Speaker 1: Sometimes the reason we've disconnected from people, or we've distanced
Speaker 1: ourselves from people, is that we're protecting ourselves from unwanted drama.
Speaker 1: Maybe we haven't had the uncomfortable or awkward discussion, and
Speaker 1: we realize, if I just stay far away from this,
Speaker 1: I never have to have it. Now, the challenge here
Speaker 1: is you're missing out on a potentially amazing relationship. But
Speaker 1: what we've done is, instead of setting a boundary, we've
Speaker 1: set a barrier. The Number one Health and Wellness Podcast,
Speaker 1: Jay Setty Jay Shetty set Hey, everyone, welcome back to
Speaker 1: On Purpose. I am so grateful that you are back
Speaker 1: with me here right now, whether you're walking your dog,
Speaker 1: whether you're cooking, whether you're driving, whether you're just hanging out,
Speaker 1: or whether you're at work. Thank you so much for
Speaker 1: lending me your time, investing your energy and your presence
Speaker 1: and your focus here on Purpose Now. Something I've been
Speaker 1: thinking about a lot late, Lee, is just as we
Speaker 1: grow older, as another year goes by, we start to
Speaker 1: reflect more deeply about the friendships that matter, the people
Speaker 1: around us, the people at work, the people we spend
Speaker 1: the most time with. How many of you have found
Speaker 1: yourself in that situation where you're starting to be much
Speaker 1: more observant about who you give your energy to, who
Speaker 1: you spend time with, how you connect with people, and
Speaker 1: to what level. And how many of you are at
Speaker 1: this point where you're just tired of small talk. You're
Speaker 1: tired of all the quick chats, the superficial, surface level conversation,
Speaker 1: and you're craving a much deeper, a much more meaningful interaction. Now,
Speaker 1: that doesn't mean that you don't want to have fun.
Speaker 1: It doesn't mean that you don't want to laugh, It
Speaker 1: doesn't mean that you don't just want to have a
Speaker 1: great time. Of course you want all of that, but
Speaker 1: you want it to mean more. You want it to
Speaker 1: matter more, You want it to to lead to more
Speaker 1: in that relationship rather than less. And I think a
Speaker 1: lot of us are feeling distant, feeling further away, feeling
Speaker 1: disconnected from people that we were once close with. How
Speaker 1: many of you have a friend in your life that
Speaker 1: you know used to talk to every day but now
Speaker 1: you rarely talk. How many of you have someone in
Speaker 1: your life that used to feel it was so easy
Speaker 1: to connect with, but recently you've just started to find
Speaker 1: it more and more difficult to open up and how
Speaker 1: many of you are struggling to find someone to be
Speaker 1: vulnerable with. I think we're hearing a lot about the
Speaker 1: loneliness epidemic. We're hearing a lot about the disconnectedness of humanity,
Speaker 1: especially since the pandemic. I think we've all found it
Speaker 1: harder and harder to kind of go back to what
Speaker 1: we had before, and we haven't really found where we're
Speaker 1: heading now. And I think a lot of people are
Speaker 1: feeling this where you're in a different emotional maturity and
Speaker 1: state than the people in your life, right, how many
Speaker 1: of you have felt that where you're like, well, I'm
Speaker 1: on this emotional track and I thought this person was
Speaker 1: with me, but actually they're on a completely different track.
Speaker 1: And it may have even taken you a while to
Speaker 1: even let that settle and to understand it. At the
Speaker 1: core of it, what a lot of us feel is
Speaker 1: that we don't have people around us who really understand us,
Speaker 1: who really see us, and who really hear us. Right,
Speaker 1: have you felt that recently where you're like, I think
Speaker 1: I'm talking to a wall, I think I'm talking right
Speaker 1: through people. Or maybe you're feeling, oh, I don't want
Speaker 1: to trouble someone with this I know that they've got
Speaker 1: enough on, but we all have that feeling, that need
Speaker 1: of yearning for connection, of yearning for understanding. The first
Speaker 1: thing I'm going to ask you to focus on, as
Speaker 1: I always do, is yourself. Do you understand where you're
Speaker 1: at and can you articulate it effectively? I think for
Speaker 1: so many of us, we're wanting other people to understand us,
Speaker 1: other people to read our minds. We assume that they
Speaker 1: should know, We assume that they should be able to adapt,
Speaker 1: that they should recognize, that acknowledge, value, whatever it is
Speaker 1: that we need. But I really want you to sit
Speaker 1: with this. Do you understand where you're at and can
Speaker 1: you articulate it? I think this is such an important
Speaker 1: point in order for you to consider, because the better
Speaker 1: you are at communicating, sharing how you feel, why you
Speaker 1: feel that way, what you're going through, you're actually increasing
Speaker 1: the list ability to also comprehend your thoughts. Now, the
Speaker 1: second point I wanted to make today is from a
Speaker 1: writer named Brian A. Chalker, and this writer wrote this
Speaker 1: beautiful poem called Season Reason or a Lifetime. This has
Speaker 1: been such a big reflection point in my life, and
Speaker 1: as the author says, everyone comes into our life for
Speaker 1: a season, a reason, or a lifetime. And I want
Speaker 1: to ask you to think about a list of people
Speaker 1: that came to your mind when I started this episode,
Speaker 1: and ask yourself, is that a seasonal person? Is that
Speaker 1: someone who came in for one season and that was it?
Speaker 1: Or are they someone who shows up seasonally but then
Speaker 1: they aren't as relevant, important, consistent at other times? You
Speaker 1: think about certain things, Right, you don't need ice cream
Speaker 1: all ly around, But it's really fun when you can
Speaker 1: eat ice cream when it's hot outside and it's warm
Speaker 1: and you're feeling like it, but you don't have to
Speaker 1: eat it every day to appreciate it. I think we
Speaker 1: often feel like, oh, if someone's seasonal, they're not good.
Speaker 1: If someone's seasonal or just for a season, then they're
Speaker 1: not a great person. The truth is they can play
Speaker 1: their role. They can play their part, and you play
Speaker 1: your part and your role in their life and things
Speaker 1: go on. It's when we expect to be able to
Speaker 1: eat ice cream all ly around that we have the issue. Right,
Speaker 1: we don't have an issue with the fact that we
Speaker 1: like enjoying ice cream at a certain time of year,
Speaker 1: but to think I need it all lyae around that's
Speaker 1: where the challenge arises. So who in your life is
Speaker 1: like that. Maybe they're back every summer, Maybe they turn
Speaker 1: up at the beginning of the year or the end
Speaker 1: of the year, or they're amazing during the holidays. Maybe
Speaker 1: they're a family member, but they're not someone that you
Speaker 1: can hang out with all the time. They're not someone
Speaker 1: who resonates all the time. It's okay, And what we're
Speaker 1: doing is we're almost compartmentalizing for ourselves that that is
Speaker 1: a season or a seasonal person, and that's their role.
Speaker 1: We're not expecting more of them, and we're not expecting
Speaker 1: less of them. We recognize what they want to do
Speaker 1: in our life. And what I've realized is when you
Speaker 1: can accept what someone shows you is who they want
Speaker 1: to be and how they show up for you, you
Speaker 1: can now share moments and memories with them without what
Speaker 1: they should have been, what they could have been, what
Speaker 1: they should have been for you by now, right, So
Speaker 1: wee need to recognize that. Chalker also talks about people
Speaker 1: who come into your life for a reason. These are
Speaker 1: often the most difficult people that we meet. Right. This
Speaker 1: could be someone who actually caused a challenge or an
Speaker 1: issue they came in our life to teach us something
Speaker 1: that was painful. And if you went through this a
Speaker 1: while ago, you can now see the reason. But if
Speaker 1: you went through it recently, the reason is the last
Speaker 1: thing you want. So if you're going through pain right
Speaker 1: now now, if you're going through stress right now, if
Speaker 1: you're going through pressure right now because someone just came in,
Speaker 1: created a whirlwind and then left and you can't see
Speaker 1: the reason right now because you're just dealing with the
Speaker 1: debris that's cascaded all over your life, then that's okay.
Speaker 1: But at one point, with some distance, you'll be able
Speaker 1: to recognize the reason. And when we recognize the reason,
Speaker 1: it changes us. When we recognize the reason that someone
Speaker 1: came into our life with, we now protect ourself from
Speaker 1: that experience in the future, and we prepare ourself to
Speaker 1: know these two points are really important. We prepare ourself
Speaker 1: for future relationships, and we protect ourself for future relationships.
Speaker 1: And this is something that I really want you to
Speaker 1: hone in on and value and deeply deeply recognize of
Speaker 1: where in your life have you not understood the reason
Speaker 1: someone came in with. Maybe there was someone long long
Speaker 1: ago that you've even hidden a way that you feel
Speaker 1: triggered by an uncomfortable bringing up in a safe space,
Speaker 1: maybe with a therapist, with a friend, maybe when you've
Speaker 1: created some distance, reflect on it and ask yourself, when
Speaker 1: they did that, what did I learn from it? What
Speaker 1: was the reason? And the third part that your talks
Speaker 1: about is people who are there for a lifetime. There
Speaker 1: are some people who may not have the biggest impact
Speaker 1: on you, they may not do the most for you,
Speaker 1: but they're always around, They're always there, They're loyalty even
Speaker 1: when it's tested, proves to be true, it proves to
Speaker 1: be real, it proves to be powerful. And that person
Speaker 1: you realize who's with you for a lifetime is someone
Speaker 1: that you continue to invest in. So I want you
Speaker 1: to think about who in your life is a season,
Speaker 1: who in your life is a reason, and who in
Speaker 1: your life came in and has stayed for a lifetime,
Speaker 1: and start understanding that it's okay that people play different
Speaker 1: roles in your life and you play different roles in
Speaker 1: their life. And I think when we expect everyone to
Speaker 1: play the same role, or we expect everyone to behave
Speaker 1: the same or we expect everyone to respect us the
Speaker 1: same or respond with us the same or connect with
Speaker 1: us the same. That's when our challenges occur. That's when
Speaker 1: our issues occur. Now, maybe you're thinking that there are
Speaker 1: certain friends you want to rebuild with, and I want
Speaker 1: to do a reflection exercise with you. You can even
Speaker 1: journal about this. I want to ask you what has broken?
Speaker 1: So when I asked you earlier like, oh, maybe there's
Speaker 1: someone in your life that you used to talk to
Speaker 1: you don't talk with anymore, or someone you used to
Speaker 1: be open with, but now you can't imagine anything but
Speaker 1: being closed with. If you want to fix it, if
Speaker 1: you want to repair it, the first question is why,
Speaker 1: Why is it worth repairing? Do we really believe that
Speaker 1: that person has something to offer us? Do we really
Speaker 1: believe that we need some closure? We have to get
Speaker 1: really intentional and clear about why we would revisit an
Speaker 1: old relationship, And then we have to ask ourselves what broke?
Speaker 1: Was it trust? Was it connection? And on a scale
Speaker 1: of one to ten, how bad was it? How truly
Speaker 1: bad was that disconnect? And ask yourself what in your
Speaker 1: current state of that relationship makes you feel uncomfortable or
Speaker 1: devalued that you've let it go. Is it too big?
Speaker 1: Is it too much? To bear, to have to reconnect,
Speaker 1: putting aside how devalued you feel, or is the relationship
Speaker 1: worth more to you? And I think that's the question
Speaker 1: we have to ask ourselves if we're trying to repair
Speaker 1: a relationship. Is repairing this relationship worth more to me
Speaker 1: than the pain caused when trying to repair it. Repairing
Speaker 1: anything will be uncomfortable, it will be hard, it will
Speaker 1: be challenging, but sometimes the belief that I want to
Speaker 1: do the right thing, I want to have this conversation.
Speaker 1: And this applies to current relationships. I know that there's
Speaker 1: someone I'm building a friendship with right now, and we're
Speaker 1: growing in our trust, we're growing in our loyalty. And
Speaker 1: I had to call them last week and have a
Speaker 1: really uncomfortable conversation with them about something that I thought
Speaker 1: could negatively affect our relationship, and actually it positively improved it.
Speaker 1: Hey guys, it's Jay Shetty here and I couldn't be
Speaker 1: more excited to share this exciting news you asked. We
Speaker 1: delivered Junie Sparkling tea with adapto gens made by my
Speaker 1: wife and I are now available in all Sprout locations
Speaker 1: across the country. Juni is the perfect midday pick me up.
Speaker 1: With only one third of the caffeine found in Brood
Speaker 1: Green Tea, it provides a gentle energy boost without the crash.
Speaker 1: It only has five calories and zero grams of sugar,
Speaker 1: making it the perfect drink. Plus, it's made with the
Speaker 1: delicious blend of adaptogens and neotropics that may help boost
Speaker 1: your metabolism, combat stress, pack your body with antioxidants, and
Speaker 1: stimulate brain function. Head over to your local Sprouts of
Speaker 1: visits sprouts dot com to find the closest location near you. Now,
Speaker 1: I didn't call with the expectation that me being honest
Speaker 1: and vulnerable and transparent would improve the relationship. I didn't
Speaker 1: call with the intention or the belief that they would
Speaker 1: turn around and say, Jay, I really respect you. Because
Speaker 1: when we act in a way in order to gain
Speaker 1: a certain reaction, we often leave feeling quite reduced and disappointed.
Speaker 1: What I mean by that is, if we behave in
Speaker 1: a certain way or act in a certain way because
Speaker 1: we are predicting, expecting, or wanting a particular type of response,
Speaker 1: we're setting ourselves up for failure. We've got to have
Speaker 1: the conversation because we believe it's the right thing to do.
Speaker 1: We have to have the conversation because we believe that
Speaker 1: it's the honest thing to do. We have to be
Speaker 1: the one to have a conversation because we think to ourselves,
Speaker 1: this is how I'd like people to treat me, this
Speaker 1: is how i'd like to be led, this is how
Speaker 1: I'd like to connect. And when we do it with
Speaker 1: that reason, whatever the response is, whether it's positive or
Speaker 1: whether it's not what we were looking for, we can
Speaker 1: hold our head high and still move forward. If you're
Speaker 1: trying to reconnect with someone too, I would ask yourself
Speaker 1: when was the last time you deeply checked in with them?
Speaker 1: I find that our society has become a lot more
Speaker 1: self centered. We're always like, why is not one checking
Speaker 1: in with me? Why do people treat me like that?
Speaker 1: Why did they say that to me? And sometimes I
Speaker 1: find and by the way, I'm prone to this as well,
Speaker 1: where I don't have the self awareness, like I don't
Speaker 1: see myself behaving in the same way as I don't
Speaker 1: like someone else behaving. Right, Does that make sense? Does
Speaker 1: that resonate? Like I remember someone I knew was telling
Speaker 1: someone else that, Like I can't believe you go to
Speaker 1: your boring job every day, And in mind, I'm thinking, wow, Like,
Speaker 1: if you're making a person feel boring and that's the
Speaker 1: job they have to go to every day, imagine how
Speaker 1: bad they're gonna feel. But the same person was saying
Speaker 1: they can't believe people say to them, Oh, I can't
Speaker 1: believe you're deciding to do that. That sounds scary, that
Speaker 1: sounds like the wrong thing. So often we don't even
Speaker 1: have the self awareness to deduce that what we're saying
Speaker 1: to others is what we don't like people saying to us.
Speaker 1: The way we behave with others is a behavior that
Speaker 1: we don't appreciate in the way people behave with us.
Speaker 1: That to me is a really subtle and nuanced point,
Speaker 1: but it can truly save or break relationships. Now I
Speaker 1: have to acknowledge that not every friendship has to have
Speaker 1: a future. Just because you had a past, just because
Speaker 1: you have memories, just because you have nostalgia, doesn't mean
Speaker 1: you have to force a future with a friend. It
Speaker 1: is okay to let it go. It's okay to let
Speaker 1: them go or let them let you go. It's okay.
Speaker 1: Trying to force a friendship into the future will actually
Speaker 1: cost you more than you realize, because if someone doesn't
Speaker 1: want to be in your life, or if you've realized
Speaker 1: that you no longer want to be in theirs, you're
Speaker 1: simply wasting time and energy. Let's celebrate something for what
Speaker 1: it was. Let's revel in what it was at the
Speaker 1: time when it served us, it nourished us, and it's okay,
Speaker 1: hey if it doesn't anymore. You had a lunch box
Speaker 1: that you took to school every day. You don't use
Speaker 1: the same lunch box anymore. You wore clothes that you
Speaker 1: loved and felt really cool in. You don't wear the
Speaker 1: same clothes anymore. You lived in an apartment that you've outgrown.
Speaker 1: It's okay, And we don't have to do it with bitterness.
Speaker 1: We don't have to do it pain. We can do
Speaker 1: it with love, celebration, and a positive outlook. One of
Speaker 1: the reasons why we feel distant from our friends is
Speaker 1: because our best memory with them is an old one.
Speaker 1: The last time our relationship achieved something or we did
Speaker 1: something was an old one. And one of the biggest
Speaker 1: things I found with friendships and why they felt shallow
Speaker 1: and not deep, was I found myself, Especially because I've
Speaker 1: left London now, I found myself. Whenever I went back home,
Speaker 1: I would often spend time with big groups of people,
Speaker 1: and I found a lot of my friends do that too. Right,
Speaker 1: we run out of time, we have less and less time.
Speaker 1: We can't see everyone, couples, friends individually, and so we go, Okay,
Speaker 1: let's just invite everyone over once a month and we'll
Speaker 1: see everyone. And what ends up happening is you have
Speaker 1: this really small, short, short conversation, this small talk exchange
Speaker 1: with each and every person. Right, you know what it
Speaker 1: feels like, you've hosted before. You just about get to Oh,
Speaker 1: how was your last week? How's the weekend? Oh yeah,
Speaker 1: you went to that place? Oh great, Okay, let me
Speaker 1: move on. Oh yeah, how's your week been? Oh yeah,
Speaker 1: your new job? Congrats? Okay, let's move on. When we're
Speaker 1: connecting with lots of people in a fast, shallow and
Speaker 1: simple way, when naturally making our relationship less and less
Speaker 1: deep and less and less meaningful. If we're always spending
Speaker 1: time with people in large groups, well we have to
Speaker 1: move on from conversations quickly. We have to figure out
Speaker 1: if you're hosting, obviously you've got to do all the
Speaker 1: hosting stuff, and you're not getting that time and space.
Speaker 1: Your relationship will always depend on how you close you
Speaker 1: were back in the day. I have a friend that
Speaker 1: we invested in deeply with probably over ten years ago,
Speaker 1: and now if I see him, it's easy for me
Speaker 1: to reconnect with him and kick it off from where
Speaker 1: we left off. But that's what we're doing. We're kicking
Speaker 1: off from over ten years ago because we don't have
Speaker 1: a dynamic, live relationship right now, and so I have
Speaker 1: to ask myself, is this a relationship I want? Is
Speaker 1: this a relationship I care about? Is this a relationship
Speaker 1: that I value? Then let me make sure I'm having
Speaker 1: these one to one conversations with I've noticed this because
Speaker 1: I've got friends back in London that I do talk
Speaker 1: to on the phone one on one. I've noticed that
Speaker 1: those are the relationships that satisfy me the most. Those
Speaker 1: are the relationships that mean the most to me. And
Speaker 1: so really figure out how much of your time are
Speaker 1: you spending in groups and how much are your time
Speaker 1: are you spending one to one? And I would argue,
Speaker 1: to really make sense of it, I would say seventy
Speaker 1: five percent of our time should be spent one on
Speaker 1: one with the people we care about and twenty five
Speaker 1: percent should be spending groups. Group time is amazing, it's exciting,
Speaker 1: it's fun, it's it's helpful in different ways, it's healing
Speaker 1: in different ways. But it's so important to have that
Speaker 1: one to one time. Sometimes the reason we've disconnected from
Speaker 1: people or we've distanced ourselves from people is that we're
Speaker 1: protecting ourselves from unwanted drama or unwanted anxiety. So we
Speaker 1: stay distanced, right like, maybe we didn't have a closer conversation,
Speaker 1: maybe we didn't figure out a relationship conversation, maybe we
Speaker 1: haven't had the uncomfortable or awkward discussion, and we realize,
Speaker 1: if I just stay far away from this and never
Speaker 1: have to have it. How many of you have felt
Speaker 1: that way? Well, you actually want to be close to someone,
Speaker 1: but you stay away from them because you know it
Speaker 1: requires a really painful conversation. Now, the challenge here is
Speaker 1: you're missing out on a potentially a amazing relationship. That
Speaker 1: person might be sitting there wondering what's going wrong as well,
Speaker 1: and what's happened to that relationship as well, And we
Speaker 1: almost miss out on the depth of connection. But I
Speaker 1: understand it. I understand it. But what we've done is
Speaker 1: instead of setting a boundary, we've set a barrier. This
Speaker 1: is a really important point I want you to listen to.
Speaker 1: So often when we're trying to set boundaries, we end
Speaker 1: up setting barriers. Barriers keep others out, Boundaries keep us
Speaker 1: safe from ourselves. Barriers make us believe the problem is
Speaker 1: the way someone treats us. Boundaries are us understanding and
Speaker 1: accepting that we need to treat ourselves better. Don't get
Speaker 1: so busy building a barrier that you lose out on
Speaker 1: a relationship or a friendship because you were actually meant
Speaker 1: to set a boundary. What I mean by this is
Speaker 1: if I reached out to someone and said, hey, you
Speaker 1: know what, I know, we haven't talked in a while,
Speaker 1: and I always felt and by the way I did
Speaker 1: this last year, I remember talking to a friend and
Speaker 1: just saying, hey, man, like I think we got distant
Speaker 1: a while ago, and this was the reason I got distant,
Speaker 1: and this is why I felt we got distant. And
Speaker 1: I'd love to hear your thoughts now. I've lifted the
Speaker 1: barrier that I've placed, and I'm allowing to hear this now.
Speaker 1: Once that person has shared how they feel with me,
Speaker 1: which they did we can now set a healthier boundary
Speaker 1: of how we'd like to deal with that moving forward together.
Speaker 1: And so a boundary is often something you can both build.
Speaker 1: And maybe it's not even a boundary. Maybe it's a bridge.
Speaker 1: Maybe it's a bridge you're building and say this is
Speaker 1: when we cross it, and this is when we don't.
Speaker 1: And I think that building a bridge back to someone
Speaker 1: with a conversation is a really healthy way to restart, rekindle,
Speaker 1: or re spark something that was meaningful to us before. Now,
Speaker 1: the biggest point I want to make today is this
Speaker 1: one a sign that you feel like you don't fit in.
Speaker 1: The sign that you don't feel disconnected is also a
Speaker 1: sign that you're growing. It's a sign that you're evolving.
Speaker 1: It's a sign that you're moving forward and you're finding
Speaker 1: your way. The difference to know this, to know whether
Speaker 1: you're growing up or whether you're growing apart, is whether
Speaker 1: you're bitter or not. If you're growing up, you won't
Speaker 1: be bitter. You'll realize that person was a season, that
Speaker 1: person was a reason, right, and then you'll grow up.
Speaker 1: But if you're growing apart or growing bitter, that's when
Speaker 1: you're thinking, oh yeah, gosh, they're not the same. You're complaining,
Speaker 1: you're finding faults. You're like, oh, yeah, like they did
Speaker 1: this to me, they did that to me, They should
Speaker 1: have done this to me, they should have done that
Speaker 1: to me. And now we're not growing, we're is growing
Speaker 1: apart from them. So it'd ask you and encourage you
Speaker 1: to think about the fact that if you don't fit
Speaker 1: in anymore, that's okay. We all go through growth spurts,
Speaker 1: we go through growth phrases. I know the plants in
Speaker 1: my house are out growing their pots all the time,
Speaker 1: right They've got to say bye bye to that soil.
Speaker 1: I know nothing about plants, but I know that much
Speaker 1: that they definitely outgrow some of the pots that they
Speaker 1: were planted in. And that's okay, and you might be
Speaker 1: going through that right now. But what we've got to
Speaker 1: be careful of is don't let growing up become growing bitter,
Speaker 1: because growing bitter creates an environment of gossip, of fault finding,
Speaker 1: of complaining, and when we start complaining and fault finding,
Speaker 1: we find ourselves stuck in that space for much longer
Speaker 1: than we ever ever imagined. I hope that these themes
Speaker 1: help you today to repair friendships that are important to you.
Speaker 1: I hope they help you deepen your relationships with the
Speaker 1: people around you, and I often find that our best
Speaker 1: relationships with people are when we do difficult things together.
Speaker 1: What I mean by that is the reason why some
Speaker 1: of our older relationships are our strongest ones, is because
Speaker 1: those people stuck with us through our greatest growth periods,
Speaker 1: our first breakup, our first job, our first redundancy, our
Speaker 1: first child, our first divorce. Those relationships because they helped
Speaker 1: you survive a pain point for you, or you help
Speaker 1: them survive a pain point for them, is the reason
Speaker 1: why they're so strong. Strong relationships are not built because
Speaker 1: you went to the movies together. Strong relationships are not
Speaker 1: built because you message each other on social media. Strong
Speaker 1: relationships are not built because you went to a concert together.
Speaker 1: They're built because you helped each other do hard things.
Speaker 1: So don't shy away when your friends need help. Don't
Speaker 1: shy away when you need help to ask for help,
Speaker 1: because that's when our best bonds are created. And stop
Speaker 1: looking at what people can do for you, and start
Speaker 1: focusing on how much you do for them when they
Speaker 1: need it, and how available you are to others as well.
Speaker 1: Thank you so much for listening. To On Purpose. I
Speaker 1: hope you're listening every day. I hope you're listening multiple
Speaker 1: times a day. Remember, we have over five hundred episodes
Speaker 1: of interviews and solos for you to go back to.
Speaker 1: This was on Purpose. Thank you for choosing us to listen,
Speaker 1: learn and grow, and I'll see you soon. If you
Speaker 1: love this episode, you'll love my interview with Dr Gabor
Speaker 1: Matte on understanding your trauma and how to heal emotional
Speaker 1: wounds to start moving on from the past. Everything in
Speaker 1: nature goes only where it's vulnerable. So a tree doesn't
Speaker 1: grow o where it's hard and thick, does it. It
Speaker 1: goes where it's soft and green and vulnerable. Mental health
Speaker 1: has now talked about more than ever, which is awesome.
Speaker 1: I mean, I don't have to tell you that it's
Speaker 1: a primary focus of on Purpose, but on a day
Speaker 1: to day baby, many people don't know where to turn
Speaker 1: or which tools can help. Over the past couple of years,
Speaker 1: I've been working with Calm to make mental wellness accessible
Speaker 1: and enjoyable, or as I like to say, fun and easy.
Speaker 1: Calm has all sorts of content to help you reduce
Speaker 1: anxiety and stress, build mindful habits, improve sleep, and generally
Speaker 1: feel better in your daily life. So many bite size
Speaker 1: options from the most knowledgeable experts in the world, along
Speaker 1: with renowned meditation teachers. You can also check out my
Speaker 1: seven minute daily series to help you live more mindfully
Speaker 1: each and every day. Right now, listeners of On Purpose
Speaker 1: get forty percent off a subscription to Calmpremium at calm
Speaker 1: dot com. Forward slash j that's calm dot com. Forward
Speaker 1: slash jay for forty percent off. Calm your Mind, Change
Speaker 1: your Life,