Speaker 1: Welcome back to Good Mom's Bad Choices. I'm Erica and
Speaker 1: I'm Meela.
Speaker 2: Happy Wednesday, Happy meda fucking Wednesday.
Speaker 3: How you doing bo I'm doing good.
Speaker 2: I'm doing good. How are you?
Speaker 3: I'm good.
Speaker 4: I'm good. It's the last week of September. I'm ready
Speaker 4: to get the fuck out of September.
Speaker 2: I am except finally, oddly, the weather in la is changing,
Speaker 2: and I'm offended as fuck. It's like been gloomy for
Speaker 2: two days. I'm like, who the fuck do you think
Speaker 2: you are?
Speaker 1: I'm happy because it's been too goddamn hot. We live
Speaker 1: in the valley, y'all, and it's disrespectful when it comes
Speaker 1: to the heat. There was like a mini fire the
Speaker 1: other day. I was like, oh shit, here we go
Speaker 1: again every year, every year.
Speaker 4: But yeah, other than that, I feel good.
Speaker 2: I'm feeling like there's I mean, obviously the seasons are changing,
Speaker 2: but it's just me that I feel like when the
Speaker 2: seasons changed, something is always like conjuring up a shift,
Speaker 2: and the energy too. I feel like shits, pop it off.
Speaker 2: And we've been busy. Erica was blind yesterday. She's had
Speaker 2: a hard week.
Speaker 3: I was legally blind.
Speaker 2: She came in today. She's like, yeah, yesterday I was blind.
Speaker 3: I was like, oh real, I was. I got it.
Speaker 1: I woke up and I couldn't see shit. It was
Speaker 1: like blurry, and I was like, what the fuck is
Speaker 1: going on? And then I put I drops in and
Speaker 1: I was like, this will for sure work.
Speaker 3: Nope.
Speaker 1: Then I got in the car and I was like, bitch,
Speaker 1: I can't see. And then I had to looked it
Speaker 1: up on Google. Could barely see the Google and it
Speaker 1: said that you probably have dry eyes. So then I
Speaker 1: went to the store. I got the lubricant. That shit
Speaker 1: didn't work.
Speaker 4: I drove to my friend near Lynd shout out to
Speaker 4: Nearland's Bridal Shower.
Speaker 3: I barely got there, and then.
Speaker 4: I yeah, I just had to just submit to the
Speaker 4: fact that I couldn't see all day.
Speaker 1: My mom won't me to have dinner with her last night.
Speaker 1: I was like, Mom, I can't drive to you, like
Speaker 1: I need to go close my eyes. Erica's had a
Speaker 1: hard week, so my body's breaking down.
Speaker 4: Guys.
Speaker 2: I went to the whiz Kid concert over the weekend,
Speaker 2: and at first I told Erica, but then I was like,
Speaker 2: she's having a hard week. Let me just tell Ashley.
Speaker 2: I was like, you know, Ashley, she's having.
Speaker 4: A heart week.
Speaker 2: You should come to Like, I've been waiting all week
Speaker 2: for you to call me. She's like I called in
Speaker 2: the morning. She's like, I hope you're calling me to
Speaker 2: tell me we have tickets. I'm like, yes, i am.
Speaker 2: And we had a good time. Wiz Kid in concert
Speaker 2: with a live band.
Speaker 4: Bitch.
Speaker 2: First of all, all the blacks were at the fucking
Speaker 2: Wilturn in line. It was beautiful Africans and the African
Speaker 2: car black people.
Speaker 3: I was like, oh my god, this is where.
Speaker 2: I belong at the wiz Kid concert. I saw all
Speaker 2: my friends there.
Speaker 3: I was even jealous. I was like, you know what,
Speaker 3: I knew you were. I was like, it was so Spotify.
Speaker 3: It was so much fun.
Speaker 4: I dance.
Speaker 2: We took a little little mushroom chocolate. Thanks Alana. That
Speaker 2: mushroom chocolate was hitting, so we gave me a little piece.
Speaker 2: Right when Essence came on and I shit hit. I
Speaker 2: was like, thank you God, thank you God, Oh my God.
Speaker 2: And then on the way there, you know, shout out
Speaker 2: to Cashley. She's always ordering the luxe the luxe lived.
Speaker 4: Yeah, I was like, wow, this is so classy.
Speaker 2: Anyway, the driver was talking to us, and I don't
Speaker 2: know what are we talking about. We're talking about open relationships,
Speaker 2: and like, I just I want a main nigga who
Speaker 2: also lets me sometimes sleep with other people. What the
Speaker 2: fuck is so hard about that? He's like, well, me
Speaker 2: and my girl have been together for five years. It's
Speaker 2: the best relationship I've ever had, and we sleep with
Speaker 2: other people all the time.
Speaker 3: It's healthy competition.
Speaker 2: After she goes and sleeps with someone, I'm always like, yeah,
Speaker 2: let me bust it down so she knows who's daddy.
Speaker 3: I'm like, that's right. Blue.
Speaker 2: He's like, he's like, let me tell you where you
Speaker 2: go if you want to find more open minded people.
Speaker 2: We're like where He's like, Bar Sinister. Here goes Ashley.
Speaker 2: I put it in my notes. I'm like, well, he's like, yeah,
Speaker 2: there's a girl there with blue hair. I'm let me
Speaker 2: show you her Instagram asked for her till I blue
Speaker 2: scent you. I was like, thank you, fucking Blue. Guess
Speaker 2: where we went after the wiz K concert, Bar Sinister. Yes,
Speaker 2: we did go to Bar Sinister.
Speaker 3: What are they doing there?
Speaker 2: Okay, well there's a long line on the other side.
Speaker 2: But I went in the back and there's a clear door.
Speaker 2: And back there they're doing like a BDSM demo through
Speaker 2: a clear door.
Speaker 3: Wait, wait, my bad, Like I'm getting the babysitter next weekend.
Speaker 3: Let's go bar sinister, bitch. Thank ye apparently right in
Speaker 3: bar sinister. What the fuck? So I'm I had a
Speaker 3: really good night.
Speaker 2: It was fun. I wasn't super hung over the next day,
Speaker 2: but I just yeah, I've had a good weekend.
Speaker 3: It's been a whild week.
Speaker 2: We've been busy, which brings me to our tarot card.
Speaker 2: Today we pulled the eight of brooms, and the eight
Speaker 2: of brooms means I actually pulled another one and I
Speaker 2: didn't like that one, But then I pulled this one,
Speaker 2: and it's very accurate. Movement, fast paced change, action, alignment,
Speaker 2: and air travel. This one says that the eight of
Speaker 2: ones it can mark significant delays, particularly concerning travel or
Speaker 2: fast moving plans. Despite having a lot of energy enthusiasm
Speaker 2: to progress things forward, you now face multiple obstacles in
Speaker 2: your course.
Speaker 3: Wait, did I pick up the wrong one? This that
Speaker 3: was reversed? Oh okay, okay, that we did not reverse.
Speaker 3: We need it regularly.
Speaker 2: That was regular Wait, sorry, we regularly It wasn't reverse.
Speaker 2: It invites you to be laser focused with your intentions
Speaker 2: and actions, determine what you want to manifest, and then
Speaker 2: align all of your resources and energy to folks becus
Speaker 2: on the singular goal, remove all distractions and devote yourself
Speaker 2: to the task with total concentration, determination, and will. This
Speaker 2: experience can be highly productive, allowing you to accomplish a
Speaker 2: lot in a short time. The other one that I
Speaker 2: picked up that it said it said the eight of
Speaker 2: Wance represents rapid movement forward applied to your career. This
Speaker 2: principle can mean rapid movement in the literal or figurative
Speaker 2: sense physically. The card can sometimes indicate that you're about
Speaker 2: to take a business triph. Eric and I are about
Speaker 2: to go to New York. It's mostly pleasure, but we're
Speaker 2: going to do some business and we're going to the
Speaker 2: Hardersoft podcast, So shout out to them for their show.
Speaker 2: So hopefully we see people. And we've been really feeling
Speaker 2: super busy and so I feel like that card was
Speaker 2: pretty accurate.
Speaker 3: Amen.
Speaker 2: Amen.
Speaker 1: Well, I would love to introduce you guys to this
Speaker 1: week's guest. We have Brittany Floyd Mayo aka Trap yoga
Speaker 1: bay that flows off the tong a little easier for me.
Speaker 1: She is a four break yoga instructor, mindset coach.
Speaker 4: Masters holders that the way you say, you know, bitch
Speaker 4: is master's level educating.
Speaker 3: Master's level educated.
Speaker 1: She's smarter than us, bitches. That's why she's here for
Speaker 1: her back to school month.
Speaker 3: Okay, teach, teach us your ways.
Speaker 4: He just britain A.
Speaker 3: Please, welcome to the show.
Speaker 4: Thank you for having me. I'm super excited.
Speaker 3: I'm so excited.
Speaker 1: I've been stalking you and I'm like, oh my god.
Speaker 1: She has a class coming up in LA on October
Speaker 1: nineteenth through the twenty third. I think yeah, And I
Speaker 1: was like, a bitch needs to go to work and
Speaker 1: do some yoga asap.
Speaker 3: I wish the shit was like this week.
Speaker 4: Okay, you know what, Oddly enough, I got you on
Speaker 4: the virtual side. I was teaching a virtual class on
Speaker 4: the thirtieth of September. And it's fun because you get
Speaker 4: to choose if you want to be on screen or
Speaker 4: if you want to be off and the people on
Speaker 4: screen I actually interact with. So there will be hundreds
Speaker 4: of people in the class, but maybe like fifty and
Speaker 4: like when they give up. I'll be like, bitch, get
Speaker 4: your ass up AND's work. Throw that ass and hill
Speaker 4: of circle? What are you doing?
Speaker 3: I throw that circle? What are you doing?
Speaker 4: So?
Speaker 1: Yeah, I love that. Wow, that's amazing. Well, thank you
Speaker 1: for coming onto this show.
Speaker 3: I know that you have.
Speaker 1: You know, we always ask our guests to share an affirmation.
Speaker 1: I know you have your ratchet affirmations, so I would
Speaker 1: love for you to share one with our with our people.
Speaker 4: It's so hard to pick one. I think with like
Speaker 4: with the way y'all's podcast works, A cute, simple one
Speaker 4: like I am a priority in my beautiful ass life.
Speaker 4: You know it really works and something that's resonating with
Speaker 4: me right now. You ask for one, but I'm extra
Speaker 4: as fuck. I'm gonna give you two. It's you can
Speaker 4: accept someone for who they are and not fuck with
Speaker 4: them for the very same reason. Yes, as we enter
Speaker 4: this retrograde and you know what I mean.
Speaker 3: Both of those speak to me. Both of those. Wait,
Speaker 3: what was the first one?
Speaker 4: It was I am a priority and it's beautiful in
Speaker 4: my ownership, it's yours in my beautiful ass life.
Speaker 1: I am a priority in my beautiful ass life.
Speaker 3: Yes, like a.
Speaker 1: Choir that speaks to me because I've like been not
Speaker 1: feeling like a priority and yeah, and like literally the
Speaker 1: past week, my body has been betraying me. Yeah, but
Speaker 1: in the blindness, and it has been been like, bitch,
Speaker 1: we can't do this anymore.
Speaker 3: Like this no longer.
Speaker 4: I heard your story. You know sometimes what you're experiencing
Speaker 4: with your eyes. Because I'm also a mid school drop out,
Speaker 4: it might be a migraine. Migraines can cause.
Speaker 3: My head was really hurting.
Speaker 4: You're not always really Sometimes it's orbs. Sometimes it's temporary blindness.
Speaker 4: So just something to see.
Speaker 3: I told you I was temporary blind. She was laughed.
Speaker 3: She always laughs at my pain. Laughed at you. You're like,
Speaker 3: I'm like, bitch.
Speaker 4: I was like, really not, but I'm devastated. I don't
Speaker 4: feel good.
Speaker 3: I'm awkward.
Speaker 2: I don't know how to if that's not me laughing
Speaker 2: at your pain, it's everything awkward. I just laugh my
Speaker 2: natural response to things. I care about. Your temporary blind.
Speaker 1: I was like, bitch, I'm legally blind. I was like,
Speaker 1: is this what it feels like when people need glasses?
Speaker 3: Yes, bitch, it's not fun.
Speaker 2: That's how I feel if I don't have a contact
Speaker 2: in I'm probably gonna get robbed. I see anything, can't identify.
Speaker 4: I lost my glasses once and went six months without them.
Speaker 4: And when I got new glasses because I couldn't drive
Speaker 4: I have a stigmatism, I put them on and I
Speaker 4: like cried. I was like wow. I was like, the
Speaker 4: world is an age? Did you like this?
Speaker 3: Shit is beautiful?
Speaker 4: It's crazy?
Speaker 3: Oh my god.
Speaker 2: I value my vision so much that I don't even
Speaker 2: really like wearing sunglasses. If I'm in a beautiful place,
Speaker 2: I'm wearing sunglasses, like, bitch, take them off.
Speaker 1: You gotta see this. I got to see it for
Speaker 1: what it actually looks like. I can't see it through this.
Speaker 1: I will never take my vision for granted again. But
Speaker 1: their affirmation is something that I This week, I was like, okay,
Speaker 1: this week, I'm after you leave today, I am going
Speaker 1: to go through my calendar for the week and really
Speaker 1: block off time for myself, specifically in the day, even
Speaker 1: if it's just twenty minutes. I don't give a fuck
Speaker 1: what I'm doing. I have to stop and do something
Speaker 1: for myself because I don't know how to.
Speaker 3: I'm I don't mean doing that, I don't be doing that.
Speaker 3: I just like work, work, work, work, work, work, work, work, work,
Speaker 3: And I wake up and I'm like, work work work.
Speaker 4: Yeah, you get into those bathroom You're like, I think
Speaker 4: I cuddled my laptop last night.
Speaker 3: Literally it's more.
Speaker 4: Heat.
Speaker 3: It was hard, hard, hard, new day.
Speaker 4: And I'm an accountability partner. That's a lot of what
Speaker 4: I do. So I'm gonna follow up with you ask okay,
Speaker 4: please do please.
Speaker 2: What was the second one? The second infirmation?
Speaker 4: Yeah, you can accept someone for who they are and
Speaker 4: not funk with them for the very same reason.
Speaker 2: You can accept someone for who they are and not
Speaker 2: fuck with them for the same reason that mine might be.
Speaker 2: For me, it'sating deep because I love everybody.
Speaker 3: I'm a cancer.
Speaker 2: I be loving everybody, and yeah, I get attached to
Speaker 2: people for no reason.
Speaker 4: I forgot to say bye to that girl.
Speaker 3: She's like who the crime made? Met in the bathroom,
Speaker 3: So you don't know her. I'm like, I do, but
Speaker 3: I do.
Speaker 4: Oh, I looked in her eyes.
Speaker 3: We made friends her Instagram. She told me about her
Speaker 3: dead grandma. Now I have to check in on her.
Speaker 4: I'm like, oh lord, oh, that's a lot of energy output.
Speaker 3: That is a lot of.
Speaker 2: Energetical I am trying to manage my energetic output and
Speaker 2: be more like conscious of it because I just do
Speaker 2: it so naturally. And then I'm like, bitch, what's wrong
Speaker 2: with you? That's what's wrong with you. You're doing a lot
Speaker 2: of energetic output.
Speaker 3: Do some input.
Speaker 2: You need to chield the fuck out input. But it's
Speaker 2: just like it's so in my nature. But I'm you know,
Speaker 2: reprogramming as an adult is really really, really hard, but
Speaker 2: I'm learning. That's my back to school lesson. Bitch, you
Speaker 2: can be always lessons outside of yourself. The lessons really
Speaker 2: start and end with yourself.
Speaker 4: That is the answer, right, right, So how did you
Speaker 4: get into where you are now and your purpose and
Speaker 4: walking in purpose?
Speaker 3: So I did some I did do a little bit
Speaker 3: of research on you and listen to.
Speaker 1: A few podcasts and learned about your history with violence
Speaker 1: as a young girl and child, and like having to
Speaker 1: unlearn those things, like Jamila said, like un learning things
Speaker 1: after like a certain age can feel really challenging. It's
Speaker 1: really impossible at times. So can you just share kind
Speaker 1: of like you know, your journey to trap Yoka Bay.
Speaker 3: Yes, in a nutshell in a shell.
Speaker 4: Right, boom, bullet points. So what happened was in the
Speaker 4: year was twenty twelve. Seriously, it was twenty fifteen. I
Speaker 4: was married, I have two children. We were living in Austin, Texas.
Speaker 3: You were married, brother young?
Speaker 4: Right, Yeah, I got married at nineteen doors at twenty seven.
Speaker 4: Honestly I heard that's the way to do it, because
Speaker 4: now I'm thirty three, and I'm like, you know, but
Speaker 4: I had gotten to an argument with my husband, which
Speaker 4: wasn't unlike us, but was unlike him was to put
Speaker 4: his hands on me, and that day he like snapped
Speaker 4: and brutally beat me, and I like didn't like, I
Speaker 4: was in shock, went to sleep, had this like crazy
Speaker 4: dream and woke up and was like, nah, like this
Speaker 4: just thing they say, what like what God has planned
Speaker 4: for me? So I was like hit him with the YO,
Speaker 4: I'm going to Walmart R. I put the kids in
Speaker 4: the car, I grabbed my dirty clothes out of the garage,
Speaker 4: and I drove thirty two hours from Austin, Texas back
Speaker 4: home to Oakland, California, where I had When I left,
Speaker 4: I was like, yeah, I'm a Christian now and like
Speaker 4: I just don't do this secular stuff. My friend was like, oh,
Speaker 4: mich when I came back and was like yeah, he
Speaker 4: wasn't that great? Was he was?
Speaker 3: Oh? Was he was? He like religious?
Speaker 4: Oh? We were Pentecostal, hardcore or I didn't curse. I
Speaker 4: didn't wear pants.
Speaker 3: You didn't wear pants. It was from that. Wow.
Speaker 2: Okay, well did you grow did you grow up that way?
Speaker 2: And then you met him and.
Speaker 4: The Jesus as your Lord and savior? Okay, that is
Speaker 4: some demon dick, demon dick. Yes, two kids, Come on,
Speaker 4: I came.
Speaker 3: You were wearing pants. You weren't wearing pants.
Speaker 4: I wasn't wearing pain, not cursing. That's I wasn't listening
Speaker 4: to the secular music. That's what I called it, like
Speaker 4: Beyonce what, I don't know what it was. It was
Speaker 4: at Ordeal. It was yes, very cult like life. And
Speaker 4: so I was laying on my grandmother's floor and me
Speaker 4: and my grandma don't even get along. She was like, yo,
Speaker 4: what the fuck like when you're gonna get the fuck
Speaker 4: out of here? And I had had some savings from
Speaker 4: my job. I was in tech, so I was in recruiting,
Speaker 4: had made me good money and was like, I need
Speaker 4: to find myself and I am not being a good mom.
Speaker 4: I am just like sitting these kids in front of
Speaker 4: the TV. I'm just feeding them. I'm lost. God, I'm
Speaker 4: about to dip and I let y'all know when I
Speaker 4: fucking find me. And so I booked a flight China, India, Brazil.
Speaker 4: I was gone. Yeah. So I studied at the how
Speaker 4: do You Own? School of Vinyasin Rashikasha, India, where I
Speaker 4: became a certified yoga instructor. Then I went on to Shanghai.
Speaker 4: Then I went on to Brazil and once I like
Speaker 4: was like, I found me and can nobody tell me shit?
Speaker 4: I came back home and was basically like yo yo, yo,
Speaker 4: yo yo. So that person you thought you knew the
Speaker 4: bitch is dead.
Speaker 3: Where your kids like, mama.
Speaker 4: Oh, it's probably why. Yeah, No, I came back different, different,
Speaker 4: But what was They were two and six? Okay, so
Speaker 4: my son doesn't have My son was two. He doesn't
Speaker 4: have as much recollection my daughter did. But the thing
Speaker 4: was there was some For a moment, I put her
Speaker 4: in therapy and that was really really good for her.
Speaker 4: And then when I became happier, I noticed my kids
Speaker 4: were changing. And that was what the dream was. It
Speaker 4: was that my kids felt like they grew up and
Speaker 4: they didn't know me because I was too busy trying
Speaker 4: to appease and trying to be accepted that I wasn't myself.
Speaker 4: So as I became more of me, my kids they
Speaker 4: became like happier kids. And then I was like, damn,
Speaker 4: this is kind of lonely being this like evolved bitch
Speaker 4: who don't give a fuck no more. Let me create
Speaker 4: like a tribe of women. And I had a friend
Speaker 4: who had a dance studio in San Francisco. She offered
Speaker 4: me the opportunity to teach. The class took off. Two
Speaker 4: weeks later, two chains called. Three weeks later, Erica Baidu called,
Speaker 4: and then I'm on tour with Sheila Marie as Hood's
Speaker 4: now wife. And somehow I went out for yoga but
Speaker 4: ended up crossing over into like the entertainment industry. Then
Speaker 4: three years later, we're a million dollar company and I'm
Speaker 4: in my high rise looking like a villain in downtown
Speaker 4: l Right, I'll be looking out like I wonder what
Speaker 4: the peasants are doing. I'm getting I'm.
Speaker 3: Kidding going down there.
Speaker 2: Wait, you have a question, how long were you gone?
Speaker 2: How long was that Eat Prey love trip?
Speaker 4: Almost four months? And then when I came back, I
Speaker 4: literally would like find every excuse to go. So since
Speaker 4: then I have traveled like the whole world. Like, we
Speaker 4: won't have time today, so you gotta to invite me back
Speaker 4: so I can say about the one time Dick got
Speaker 4: me put in jail in Singapore.
Speaker 3: Oh, I've seen my hotel.
Speaker 2: That you found in Singapore that put you in jail.
Speaker 4: That ain't the I was wild, girl. I wasn't cursing.
Speaker 2: I wasn't really Oh yeah, you had to you had
Speaker 2: to relate this. Yeah, you had like seven years.
Speaker 3: Jail and Singapore. I'm thinking of what's that broke down Palace?
Speaker 4: That is the movie? So that is the movie that
Speaker 4: made me lose my mind in jail. And they're like,
Speaker 4: I'm a good girl. I'm a good girl. I'm good
Speaker 4: forgive me Jesus. Yeah, okay. Bullet points told the man
Speaker 4: not to can't take niggas nowhere nowhere, and I was like,
Speaker 4: oh you got good Dick, Like, why don't you just
Speaker 4: come to Singapore?
Speaker 3: He bring weed lord.
Speaker 4: And they ran through the bag and I called my friend,
Speaker 4: was like, girl, I wasn't attached to my girl. He
Speaker 4: about to go to motherfucking jail. I ain't saying no,
Speaker 4: Bill like like you with him and I was like
Speaker 4: not really, and then they took you like oh yeah you.
Speaker 4: And so I went to jail for five days and
Speaker 4: I was in there like losing my ship so much
Speaker 4: that they were like maybe psychiatry evaluation, and they sent
Speaker 4: me to the psych unit and I was like that's fine.
Speaker 4: I got there and was like, actually, I like jail better.
Speaker 4: Can I go back to jail all of that ordeal?
Speaker 4: And they were just like, give us five thousand dollars
Speaker 4: and don't come back.
Speaker 2: And I was like, so you can never go to
Speaker 2: Singapore ever again.
Speaker 4: I got six years left. Oh is he still him?
Speaker 2: I don't know where he at.
Speaker 4: Wait, you haven't changed his lines under the jail. You
Speaker 4: didn't google or anything, gonna cause family, his mom. This
Speaker 4: was a safe space. I hear a little judgment, A
Speaker 4: little judgment I don't really get.
Speaker 3: I think it's fine.
Speaker 4: I got kids. It's a cancer in me, Like you
Speaker 4: didn't check this? He still like that, don't give He
Speaker 4: was seutarious. He's all right, oh yeah, yeah, I'm furious.
Speaker 4: It's well within my nature to be like, oh I
Speaker 4: don't like that detached to detach yuh, that's sad. Everybody's
Speaker 4: doing what they're doing.
Speaker 2: Let this be a testament to everyone. Don't ship no niggas,
Speaker 2: So don't ship no no imports to any form really anywhere.
Speaker 3: Don't ship them in period.
Speaker 1: Okay, if they can't get them fucking cells there. If
Speaker 1: the shoe was on the other foot, and this was
Speaker 1: Jamila's cancer ass.
Speaker 4: She'd been like, is he okay? Let me go check
Speaker 4: on him.
Speaker 5: Actually gotta fly back his court case or maybe probably right,
Speaker 5: But first of all, after five days in Singapore and jail,
Speaker 5: that would be my first step into not giving a fuck.
Speaker 3: Okay, I'm like, don't care, don't ever call me for real.
Speaker 4: Cancer's guide to not giving a funk go to jail
Speaker 4: was singing part for five days. And when I saw
Speaker 4: him in past and he was like.
Speaker 3: Nobody told you to bring marijuana.
Speaker 4: Everything specifically told you don't bring shit here, like and
Speaker 4: if you can't leave your house with ill weed, you
Speaker 4: got a problem. Not everybody gets come shit happened.
Speaker 3: That's so.
Speaker 4: With circle back, what was talking about.
Speaker 3: I'm just so inspired by this story.
Speaker 2: I want to know. I'm you know, we're personally beginning
Speaker 2: everybody's business. Was that the okay, minus the arguing. Was
Speaker 2: that the first time he ever put his hands on you,
Speaker 2: and that was like, that's what that was, Like, you're
Speaker 2: the cam.
Speaker 3: What is the straw that broke the camel's back.
Speaker 4: M It was the first time he was like looking
Speaker 4: at me, and I was like, I'm from the hood,
Speaker 4: Like I've been in tons of his fights, and so
Speaker 4: it's not like I was like, oh my god, he's
Speaker 4: hitting me. I was just like, for real, nigga, for real,
Speaker 4: you know, like I started cursing again, and he's just
Speaker 4: like body shots. So we had got like he was
Speaker 4: like taking pride. It was like a lot of it.
Speaker 4: There had been an argument that we'd gotten into before,
Speaker 4: and he slammed me in a car door and he
Speaker 4: was very like apologetic, and so I was like, eh,
Speaker 4: you know, and then young love, I'll take him back.
Speaker 4: But that was the first time that I had really
Speaker 4: just like you know, like Bruce clavical face swollen.
Speaker 2: Like oh, I'm in a lifetime movie type shit.
Speaker 4: Yeah. Yeah, Like it was one of those, and so yeah,
Speaker 4: I'm happy that I walked away, and I think, you know,
Speaker 4: let that be a testament. A lot of times people
Speaker 4: think like that was the worst day of my life
Speaker 4: and the worst day of your life is a springboard
Speaker 4: for the best life that you could ever live. Walk
Speaker 4: the fuck away. I'm suggested.
Speaker 1: I was listening to you on highway and another jumla. Yeah,
Speaker 1: I was listening and you said something that really stuck
Speaker 1: with me, and it was the prerequisite for joy is
Speaker 1: basically experiencing the other end of that. And I was like, damn,
Speaker 1: like it's show it's so true, and I feel like,
Speaker 1: I mean, obviously that's your testament to that. How do
Speaker 1: you now navigate in that space because obviously your I
Speaker 1: don't know if your kids are you know, if he's
Speaker 1: so involved with your kids, and like, how do you
Speaker 1: navigate co parenting essentially with your abuser in some capacity,
Speaker 1: Like yeah, like how do you navigate that space? And like,
Speaker 1: I'm sure you guys have come a long way since
Speaker 1: that moment.
Speaker 3: Maybe I don't know. I don't know. I trust me, amen,
Speaker 3: I know how you feel.
Speaker 4: No, it's a good question. So for the first ten
Speaker 4: months when I left, he was very much like fuck
Speaker 4: you and them kids, like if I can't have you,
Speaker 4: I will start over. And then one day he popped
Speaker 4: up at my new home and like had like broken
Speaker 4: girl had put his tooth firsh for my tooth first, wooh,
Speaker 4: what tattoo of my face on his hands? I had
Speaker 4: lost his fucking mind. And what was I was coming
Speaker 4: back from a speaking engagement with the homeboy and he
Speaker 4: just assumed I was sleeping with the homeboy and was like,
Speaker 4: I knew it so biblical people. So he was waiting
Speaker 4: at the wait walked in with the dew. When you
Speaker 4: sleeping with the dow? Walked in with the dow. And
Speaker 4: what's funny is like church folk call you a harlet.
Speaker 4: He was like you harlot, and he was like, you'd
Speaker 4: be letting these men fuck on you. And I was like, correction,
Speaker 4: I fucked them back, fuck each other. We be fucking
Speaker 4: each other, not this one. And he like went to
Speaker 4: lunch at me and the guy friend like beat the
Speaker 4: shit out of it.
Speaker 3: He imagine that man.
Speaker 4: And I was watching very calmly, and eventually I got
Speaker 4: over it and like called my brother and was like, yo,
Speaker 4: can you just can come with these niggas off my floor?
Speaker 4: You know this is my lanm broke. It's a little
Speaker 4: bit much. And so the divorce was gnarly. It was nasty,
Speaker 4: It was very, very hard. And then when my company
Speaker 4: took off, that is when he was like, oh, I
Speaker 4: want to make your life live in hell. We went
Speaker 4: through child support. There was a point where I was
Speaker 4: paying six thousand dollars a month in child support. You ladies,
Speaker 4: if you have an LLC, make sure you separate your
Speaker 4: shit because they can pierce your veil. And all of
Speaker 4: the income from trap Yoga Bay got assigned to me
Speaker 4: and they was like, pay that man.
Speaker 2: So because there was it wasn't separate enterity.
Speaker 4: Yeah, it wasn't like it wasn't it wasn't LLC, but
Speaker 4: I was co mingling funds. I didn't know what the
Speaker 4: fuck I was doing, like my first year, and I
Speaker 4: think people should be more transparent about this. My first year,
Speaker 4: I made over three hundred thousand dollars. I know what
Speaker 4: the fuck was.
Speaker 3: I was like money, right, right, right, And.
Speaker 4: Then you'd be like, actually, it's not that rich. But
Speaker 4: the divorce took almost two and a half years. I
Speaker 4: had to get a lawyer and the n we ended
Speaker 4: up with fifty to fifty custody and then there was
Speaker 4: a lot of contention. But I quickly just like reframed
Speaker 4: my mindset around it and like he knows it. He
Speaker 4: listens to the podcast, like he'll hear this one. I
Speaker 4: affectionately now call him my baby mama. I'm like my
Speaker 4: baby mama, bad bitch. You know, he's beautiful. He like
Speaker 4: our dynamic is very much like he treats me like
Speaker 4: the baby daddy. And so this school year, or when
Speaker 4: I up and moved to la during the pandemic, it
Speaker 4: was fine because the kids had virtual school. But now
Speaker 4: they're back in school and my daughter has a lot
Speaker 4: of say in her life. So she was like, I
Speaker 4: want to go back to my old school. I want
Speaker 4: to see my old friends. And I was like, oh,
Speaker 4: so you're gonna go back to Oakland. Hmmm, all right,
Speaker 4: well I'm gonna miss you. Call me and so jokingly
Speaker 4: because I see my kids all the time and I
Speaker 4: call them, but I'm like, this is the year of
Speaker 4: the dead beat mom, Like this is the year. This
Speaker 4: is the year beat mom, you know, like it is
Speaker 4: what it is. This is I've had kids since I
Speaker 4: was twenty. I've never been an adult woman without children.
Speaker 4: This is the longest stint and it's been five weeks.
Speaker 4: This is the longest stint where I've been like in
Speaker 4: love with myself, financially stable, happy, joyful and finest, fuck
Speaker 4: childless what I'm out? You know?
Speaker 3: So so you're winning.
Speaker 4: So yeah. So now because he's like taking over the
Speaker 4: parenting thing, Like he'll be like the son is eating groceries.
Speaker 4: I'll be like, damn, okay, here's like five hundred dollars,
Speaker 4: Like what the fuck? Like, can I order y'all some
Speaker 4: Hello Fresh?
Speaker 3: Like what you mean you need pee too?
Speaker 2: I mean to deliver pictures to Hype, right, I'd be like.
Speaker 4: She got my uber east the count, Like tell that
Speaker 4: girl order some pizza, don't order. Don't be doing too much.
Speaker 4: Don't be doing too much, like call your daddy. So
Speaker 4: this is a very interesting and unique time where I
Speaker 4: am now thirty three, fully navigating womanhood without children. So
Speaker 4: I don't know if that resonates with anybody, but it's
Speaker 4: it's a different day.
Speaker 3: That's amazing.
Speaker 1: I mean, I think I think that that's a story
Speaker 1: that you don't hear often, right, Like you hear that,
Speaker 1: you know, you know, the kid is always supposed to
Speaker 1: be with the mother, Like that's.
Speaker 4: What mom's amazing to be.
Speaker 1: But I have a question though, because because of the
Speaker 1: history that you have with him. Do you ever con
Speaker 1: because this is always my fear because I mean we're
Speaker 1: both single parents, and for me, like I don't really
Speaker 1: know what kind of parenting is happening on the other side,
Speaker 1: Like I just don't. He doesn't care to share with me,
Speaker 1: he doesn't care to co parent with me. Really, yeah,
Speaker 1: and we're not it's not a team effort. So do
Speaker 1: you ever get concerned about like, you know, how how
Speaker 1: how being real? Yeah, if you're going to have to
Speaker 1: do a lot of unprogramming.
Speaker 4: Oh, absolutely definitely there's reprogramming. I mean things as simple
Speaker 4: as you know, the way my son in him interact
Speaker 4: versus like what I allow is different. So they come over,
Speaker 4: you know, and it's just like day one is always
Speaker 4: like transitions. Day two is like, all right, so we're here.
Speaker 4: Let me tell y'all, y'all might have forgot the rules
Speaker 4: the same datty house. You know, it's not his house.
Speaker 4: So I think, you know, there is that. But if
Speaker 4: we can start focusing on only controlling what we can, right,
Speaker 4: and I think it illuminates the differences in parenting styles
Speaker 4: when you guys are parenting separate. But if you think
Speaker 4: about it, if you guys. Ever, you know, cohabitated with
Speaker 4: the children, there was still that contention, there was still
Speaker 4: that difference in how you parented. And you know, I
Speaker 4: remember when you know, we were doing the crowdout method
Speaker 4: to sleep train my daughter and I was very much
Speaker 4: like not tripping when she was crying, and he was like,
Speaker 4: damn you a monster, and no, she'll figure it out,
Speaker 4: and we would have those moments of this is how
Speaker 4: I want a parent, This is how I want a parent.
Speaker 4: So when I can remember that, this is no different
Speaker 4: than when we were in one household, and you know,
Speaker 4: what's my ideal situation outside of us being married is,
Speaker 4: you know, eventually I move forward and find a person
Speaker 4: who loves me and loves the kids, and he does
Speaker 4: the same. And now these children have four parents. And
Speaker 4: typically I like his girlfriends more than I like him
Speaker 4: like and that's one thing I'll give him. He was
Speaker 4: not a good husband to me. He show know how
Speaker 4: to pick some good women, and he's an amazing father,
Speaker 4: and so I trust his process and I ask a
Speaker 4: lot of questions, which I think it sometimes puts undue
Speaker 4: pressure on my daughter to like report because you get
Speaker 4: in and I'll be like, all right, snitch to me,
Speaker 4: what's going on over there, you know, And so I
Speaker 4: acknowledge that, but it's out of our you know, it's
Speaker 4: out of my control. And as long as I'm never
Speaker 4: hearing things that feel alarming like abuse because he has
Speaker 4: a history of abusing women or you know, heavy patriarchal
Speaker 4: things that I'm like, yeah, we're not gonna be putting
Speaker 4: that on my daughter, then then I kind of just
Speaker 4: gotta let him do his things. I picked him, and
Speaker 4: sometimes I apologize to myself and other people, like, I'm sorry,
Speaker 4: that's who I chose. He was mine. I did not
Speaker 4: stick beside him, but I him.
Speaker 3: Do you think you get married again? Do you think
Speaker 3: you get married again?
Speaker 4: Girl? Did you see my mission?
Speaker 3: What do you speak of?
Speaker 4: I felt like you jumped in my over. I felt
Speaker 4: like you proposed to me. It's a little quick for
Speaker 4: that ship. I believe in commitment and I believe in
Speaker 4: deep connection and joy, and that is what I prioritize
Speaker 4: over titles in time, and so I think at best
Speaker 4: I could I could do a commitment ceremony.
Speaker 3: Best.
Speaker 4: At best I can do I can let everybody know,
Speaker 4: like I'm fucking with this person. We rocking steady.
Speaker 3: Are you in a relationship right now? Okay, it comes
Speaker 3: maybe a.
Speaker 2: Little bit, it's not even it's not complicated, Like do
Speaker 2: you not believe like maybe not marriage. Do you believe
Speaker 2: in saying, oh, this is my partner or not that's
Speaker 2: even a.
Speaker 4: Yeah, No, I believe I believe in saying like, this
Speaker 4: is my partner. I think the variety is important, and
Speaker 4: I have someone that I cherish and I love spending
Speaker 4: in time with. But I'm also like, yeah.
Speaker 2: There's a lot there's a lot of fish.
Speaker 4: Inc there's a lot of fish in the sea, and
Speaker 4: you know, I go on a date over there, like
Speaker 4: it ain't so great, and then I'm like, yeah, I
Speaker 4: didn't have a good time, like you hungry? Hell yeah,
Speaker 4: I'm hungry, Like you know what I need? My bad
Speaker 4: I don't even know. Let me just go ahead and
Speaker 4: send all my friends call me the hr hoe because
Speaker 4: I send hr messages when I break it off with people, which, oh,
Speaker 4: thank you so much for your time and your effort.
Speaker 4: After careful consideration, I do not think that it sads
Speaker 4: for us to move forward with this. However, I wish
Speaker 4: you're messing your future.
Speaker 3: It may afford me that time.
Speaker 1: H you are hr I feel I've been doing that
Speaker 1: ship too. I recently did that with somebody and he
Speaker 1: just could not believe it. He could not believe that
Speaker 1: this was happening. And then I find that when you
Speaker 1: do that, though they respect it, they act that they
Speaker 1: respect it, and then they always they think you're they
Speaker 1: think you're joking.
Speaker 2: No, they want to they want to prove to you
Speaker 2: that you you're wrong.
Speaker 3: Well, they just they don't want to believe you have boundaries.
Speaker 4: And that's what it is.
Speaker 1: And I know that, like you know, I know that
Speaker 1: you talk a lot about boundaries and like how importan
Speaker 1: in a jam, yeah, and how important they are, and
Speaker 1: like how do you what is your biggest I guess
Speaker 1: tip for starting to implement boundaries in your life? Because
Speaker 1: I know there's a lot of people listening to that,
Speaker 1: like they don't even know where to start for.
Speaker 4: Sure, for sure, because it's not easy. I would say,
Speaker 4: people don't know where to start where They're like, I
Speaker 4: don't even know where, like where that boundary line is?
Speaker 4: And I said, or when I need to implement them?
Speaker 4: My biggest step one advice is if you feel like
Speaker 4: I have to choose between loving you and loving me.
Speaker 4: Then the boundary is I need to love myself, and
Speaker 4: that's in compromising. A lot of times you're like, oh,
Speaker 4: you know, I found out he's talking to somebody else,
Speaker 4: but we're in a close relationship.
Speaker 3: Oh you know.
Speaker 4: If I stay, I'm low key gonna hate myself and
Speaker 4: it's gonna change the dynamic. Then it's time for a boundary,
Speaker 4: because now if I proceed with this, I'm gonna feel
Speaker 4: some kind of way about me and to me. That's
Speaker 4: at least the starting point of like, now, let's be
Speaker 4: aware that we don't like that. So I've got an
Speaker 4: hr message for you. Oh my god, I can't wait
Speaker 4: tear this please, So I said, was this reason? Yes, yes,
Speaker 4: and it actually is the hotel that I was going
Speaker 4: to tell you about. So I said, stink, you already
Speaker 4: had a nickname for this nigga. No, No, that that's general.
Speaker 3: It's okay.
Speaker 4: I have to make this very clear. I cannot participate
Speaker 4: in this. I do not want to be a part
Speaker 4: of your life. I would never suggest that you meet
Speaker 4: a meeting, miss a meeting. He was like, he was
Speaker 4: gonna miss a meeting to come talk to me. I
Speaker 4: don't want to talk miss a meeting for someone who
Speaker 4: is not interested in moving forward. I appreciate you for
Speaker 4: your transparency and for giving me a genuine try. I
Speaker 4: will not be responding to any calls or text beyond
Speaker 4: this message. Please take care of yourself.
Speaker 3: I for I didn't stop. So, wait, what are the
Speaker 3: links he's sending?
Speaker 4: What is that link?
Speaker 3: Review of what?
Speaker 2: So?
Speaker 4: He told me that I was giving him cardiomyopathy, being
Speaker 4: responded heart palpitations, bullshit no. So then he me a
Speaker 4: video of how I like. If you watch my Instagram,
Speaker 4: you notice I make my bed every day and I
Speaker 4: show people how I felt close. And then he showed
Speaker 4: me how he folds close like me. Now, oh but here,
Speaker 4: here's boundaries. You see all of these?
Speaker 3: Wait? Was he sending you tomor Braxton music music?
Speaker 4: Yes?
Speaker 3: Stop?
Speaker 4: What does his voice know? What is his signa? Crazy?
Speaker 3: Crazy?
Speaker 4: Wow? We should tell this story.
Speaker 3: Yeah, I'm trying to.
Speaker 2: Remember he was aries, he was I don't know anything
Speaker 2: about them, their fiery.
Speaker 4: And it ended with like, look, can I just bring
Speaker 4: you some money? And I'm just like, I'm not moves
Speaker 4: my money money not. The last message was like, look
Speaker 4: I have somebody who can bring you four thousand dollars
Speaker 4: right now needs you to respond?
Speaker 3: Why need he's a con artist?
Speaker 4: He wasn't, so I'm like, oh, if this man find
Speaker 4: he gonna kill me. He like, I don't do thugs.
Speaker 4: I don't, I don't.
Speaker 2: Is that a thug sending your tamar b was a thug?
Speaker 4: Was a thug? I don't do thugs? So oh shit,
Speaker 4: what happened? What happened was I was out here an
Speaker 4: event and I had met a guy right, and I
Speaker 4: was like, ooh, I like him, right, but he lived
Speaker 4: in New York. He had to fly out, and so
Speaker 4: we were talking on the phone and he was just
Speaker 4: like I can't take it, Like can you come see
Speaker 4: me in New York? And I was like, yeah, I
Speaker 4: guess I can come see you in New York. Be like,
Speaker 4: you know, I can't stay with you. Get me a
Speaker 4: hotel room, all that shit, and he's like, okay, cool,
Speaker 4: I got you. So he gets me my flight, he
Speaker 4: gives me my hotel room. I'm on my way. I
Speaker 4: text him and I'm like, are you excited to see me?
Speaker 4: And he's like yeah, but I have to be honest
Speaker 4: with you. I'm a little tired, so I won't be
Speaker 4: able to pick you up from the airport, and I'm
Speaker 4: like the problem. So then what he forgot to do
Speaker 4: was blocking me from his Instagram stories.
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Speaker 2: Stupid.
Speaker 4: I watched his Instagram stories and he ain't at no
Speaker 4: motherfucking gang bitchy at Barclay's, sleep at Barclay's with another bitch,
Speaker 4: like while you got.
Speaker 2: Me in transit to New York, So why didn't you
Speaker 2: take me out of your story?
Speaker 3: You're a dumb asshole, oh dumb as fuck? Right, and
Speaker 3: so why are you? Like, hey, thanks for the free trip.
Speaker 4: Right, So I'm on my way in here. I'm pissed,
Speaker 4: and so randomly I get another long ass text message
Speaker 4: and it's like, yo, Brittany, like I saw in your
Speaker 4: story that you were on your way to New York.
Speaker 4: Because I have posts like hey, you know anybody else
Speaker 4: for some fun? Out my way in New York was popping,
Speaker 4: and I'm just like, who is this? He tells me
Speaker 4: who it is. It's somebody that I knew from like
Speaker 4: way bit I'm talking like middle school. He's like, I've
Speaker 4: been watching your journey. I think it's you're amazing. I
Speaker 4: want to see you when you get to New York.
Speaker 4: And typically I'd be like, nah, hell no like you
Speaker 4: being we like you. You sound like a fan, and
Speaker 4: I've had fans and I've had stalkers, so like, but
Speaker 4: I was like.
Speaker 3: The Spike, let me do some ho shit.
Speaker 4: I'm available, absolutely, absolutely, And he's like, oh, where you staying.
Speaker 4: I'm like, oh, I'm at this hotel, nice hotel in
Speaker 4: Brooklyn's like no, like you're a Manhattan gir, I'm gonna
Speaker 4: put you up in a different hotel.
Speaker 3: Man like these a lot. So then so then.
Speaker 4: He's like, here's the restaurants. I can take you to,
Speaker 4: my strolls whatever, whatever. My driver is gonna pick you up.
Speaker 4: So I'm just like, okay, I'm doing middle school. He's
Speaker 4: been doing big things this middle school right. So now
Speaker 4: he's like he's like deals in weed. He like does
Speaker 4: like a whisked leaf. And then when they like buy
Speaker 4: weed and they white label it. So he white labels
Speaker 4: weed for celebrities. So I'm like, okay, all right to
Speaker 4: talk about it. So we get there, like he's sitting
Speaker 4: in my hotel and I'm like, okay, like you're talking
Speaker 4: to me to the sun come up. I'm like, he's like,
Speaker 4: you know, I was really hoping something. I was like,
Speaker 4: let me tell someth about this pussy sir, Like you
Speaker 4: don't seem stable enough, like I just I don't recommend it,
Speaker 4: like you could smell.
Speaker 2: It, like look, I love it, don't for my child's
Speaker 2: after that.
Speaker 4: Right, And so I was like I'm gonna take a shower,
Speaker 4: like maybe you should go. So took a shower and
Speaker 4: came back. He's like I thought about it. I don't care.
Speaker 4: You can ruin my life. And I was like, no, seriously,
Speaker 4: the most you can do is smell upussy like.
Speaker 3: And I just let him snip it just a little bit.
Speaker 3: You're my hero. You didn't even look it.
Speaker 2: No, you're no, because I was like, you're gonna go.
Speaker 4: We're gonna cry, right, And so then the next day
Speaker 4: I was like, still, there're supposed to be there for
Speaker 4: four days. But then I was like like we went shopping,
Speaker 4: had a great time, but there was something a little
Speaker 4: like a little too possessive about it. So then y'all,
Speaker 4: his driver looks at me in the rear view mirror. Oh,
Speaker 4: slightly lustfully he does. He was looking like and this
Speaker 4: guy says, what the fuck you're looking at? My bitch
Speaker 4: for reaches forward and slaps his driver.
Speaker 3: I'm like, wait, hold the fuck up.
Speaker 4: He slaps the dog ship out of his driver for
Speaker 4: looking at open.
Speaker 3: Hand, driving lustily.
Speaker 4: Yes, bitch, waits you got girl, I'm pussy smell like girl.
Speaker 4: Have you ever seen my recipe for pussy juice? I
Speaker 4: highly recommend it.
Speaker 3: Oh wow, get that one.
Speaker 4: Yes, it's all my stories, It's in my highlights.
Speaker 3: It's like, shit, what did you do?
Speaker 4: Bitch? Bitch? I was like, I got a meeting. I
Speaker 4: gotta get the body.
Speaker 3: My meeting just came up and just came up back and.
Speaker 4: Back in la. All right. I got stuck. I am
Speaker 4: not about to see this through my boy. So so
Speaker 4: I'm like, for real, I gotta go. I like text
Speaker 4: my assist and was like call me act soberly, like
Speaker 4: just run with it, and she like she knows sometimes
Speaker 4: I'll be on my whole shop. So she knows.
Speaker 3: She like she got me.
Speaker 4: She got me. So I get my bags. My assistant
Speaker 4: like books my flight and I'm like, yo, you know,
Speaker 4: like you don't got to take me to the airport.
Speaker 4: He's like, oh, but I will. So he leaves. The
Speaker 4: driver comes back, takes me to the airport. Y'all. I
Speaker 4: get to the motherfucking airport. The driver takes out my bag.
Speaker 4: The driver takes out another bag and I'm like, what's
Speaker 4: that stuffing? What's that? And he's like, I can't live
Speaker 4: without you.
Speaker 3: The driver, no dude.
Speaker 4: To get killed. And he's like, I'm coming with you
Speaker 4: back to California. And I'm like like, no, the fuck,
Speaker 4: you're not.
Speaker 3: I'm scared.
Speaker 4: No the but I'm scared.
Speaker 3: You're scared, but I am fright, tend right.
Speaker 4: And so he's like he's like, I know you, I
Speaker 4: know you, and mind you. He was like, I've been
Speaker 4: checking for you throughout the years. I'm like spilling all
Speaker 4: the tea. So I went to high school with an
Speaker 4: actor who's like super famous now yeah tea, and I
Speaker 4: had a crustion on him.
Speaker 3: Back a tell him I'm looking for I've been It's
Speaker 3: my man. It's my man.
Speaker 4: Well, well maybe can we both can we can we
Speaker 4: just maybe for both variety, Maybe we can both go
Speaker 4: for careful you know dudes together, baby, we might politic
Speaker 4: my yoga post together. And but like, let me be transparent, right,
Speaker 4: he ain't fucking with me, like like like we were
Speaker 4: supposed to be in Australia. It ain't work out, and
Speaker 4: like he ain't really been he ain't really like so
Speaker 4: but we all went to school together and he was like, yeah,
Speaker 4: I know you'd be trying to fuck on yah y'ah.
Speaker 3: Oh yeah, got that right.
Speaker 4: He's like I did that. And I was like, oh,
Speaker 4: so you why I can't get yah yah? Draws you
Speaker 4: the reason? You the reason he said he did what
Speaker 4: he did, like I did it that ship.
Speaker 3: He's a crazy lady.
Speaker 4: So anyway, so I'm like, he's like, I know you
Speaker 4: you're a runner and if now let you get on
Speaker 4: this flight, I will never see you again. And I
Speaker 4: was like, you don't know what's gonna happen, Like this
Speaker 4: plane could crash and I could die. And he was like.
Speaker 3: And I was like, yo, let me get this is
Speaker 3: all happening at the airport.
Speaker 4: A report at JFK just walking around in the wild
Speaker 4: and people he knows, God, I'm scared. Yeah, so I
Speaker 4: needed to say his full name. People women watch watch clubs.
Speaker 4: So I get on the flight and he like and
Speaker 4: he was just like you left me, and I was
Speaker 4: just like yo, yo do. And so then that's where
Speaker 4: the HR message comes from.
Speaker 3: Like oh, okay, this is wow.
Speaker 4: And then all those messages yeah, and so I'm like whoa.
Speaker 4: And so maybe the more of the story is like,
Speaker 4: don't do spiteful ship. I would have never ever hung
Speaker 4: out with this man unless I had gotten that odd
Speaker 4: And when the odd thing happened with the other dude, like,
Speaker 4: I sent one cryptic DM and I was like, I
Speaker 4: just want to know, did your team win?
Speaker 3: Not a cryptic DM from you?
Speaker 4: No, he didn't respond that day. He didn't and then
Speaker 4: he was like blowing me up.
Speaker 3: The whole trip.
Speaker 4: And I'm like, no, I'm good, I'm good.
Speaker 3: I didn't have no hotels.
Speaker 4: I never spoke to him again. I don't play that
Speaker 4: boundaries boundaries.
Speaker 2: Wow, that's an epic psycho crazy.
Speaker 3: That's an epic story on boundaries.
Speaker 2: Wait, okay, so I have a question about boundaries. So
Speaker 2: like we talked about your experience and how you've like
Speaker 2: made this drastic change and like that like upstarted all
Speaker 2: this other amazing shit. But like, how would you say, Like,
Speaker 2: because I also stopped you a little bit, did some research.
Speaker 2: I know you've had like you know, family history traumas
Speaker 2: and shit like.
Speaker 4: We all have.
Speaker 2: But obviously like you have this abusive relationship with this
Speaker 2: very Christian baby daddy, and then like I think women
Speaker 2: have a hard time setting boundaries with men because we'd
Speaker 2: be getting digmatized and were all were so programmed to
Speaker 2: be like you need a partner, you need this person
Speaker 2: and like the comfort almost even if you're unhappy you
Speaker 2: come from like toxic ast relationships and me personally, I'm
Speaker 2: all always talking about childhood trauma and how to like
Speaker 2: heal from it because that's that's your whole adult life
Speaker 2: if you're if you care about growing, it's all about yeah, right,
Speaker 2: So how would you say, like, you've your experience has
Speaker 2: really like in both ways who you've attracted, because how
Speaker 2: the fuck did you? First of all, you chose your
Speaker 2: baby daddy, as we all show, But like I think
Speaker 2: women have a hard time shifting that, Like it's one
Speaker 2: thing to recognize that you have some things that you
Speaker 2: need to work on. It's a whole different thing to
Speaker 2: act on them and then choose a partner based on
Speaker 2: the choices and the changes that you've made. I think
Speaker 2: when you've grown up in like abusive situations trauma, it's
Speaker 2: easy to attract relationships and partners like that because it's familiar, right,
Speaker 2: But like, how do you like first to recognize that,
Speaker 2: like until like maybe it's not you getting hit in
Speaker 2: the face or whatever, even though that's the case for
Speaker 2: a lot of women, Like what really made you start
Speaker 2: acting on those boundaries and the people you choose, people
Speaker 2: who share your energy, because that's hard for me.
Speaker 4: Yeah, And I think, like you said that, childhood trauma,
Speaker 4: it permeates every facet of your life, how you show
Speaker 4: up in corporate how you show up in friendships, how
Speaker 4: you show up as a parent. In a lot of ways,
Speaker 4: what we end up being led by is fear instead
Speaker 4: of love, fear of loss, fear of judgment, fear of abandonment.
Speaker 4: Instead of I give from a place of love, It's
Speaker 4: like I give from a place of like, please love
Speaker 4: me back. And I think that is where mindfulness becomes
Speaker 4: very important and a lot of times people are telling
Speaker 4: me like, I don't like to meditate because I can't
Speaker 4: quiet my mind. The point isn't ever to quiet your mind.
Speaker 4: It's to create some separation so that you can then
Speaker 4: observe yourself so that then you can say, Hm, why
Speaker 4: did I make that decision? And it's how bothered am
Speaker 4: I by the outcome of that? And so I think
Speaker 4: for me since my ex husband, you know, and like
Speaker 4: these three random stories I told you, those are times
Speaker 4: where I know that I fucking chose chaos. Like I
Speaker 4: kid you not, I was like, mindful moment, Brittany, what
Speaker 4: are we doing? How do we feel violence?
Speaker 3: Right?
Speaker 4: Because for a little razzle dazzle. But outside of like
Speaker 4: those scenarios that I told you about, which I feel
Speaker 4: like I'm mindfully chose, I come across some of the
Speaker 4: most amazing and phenomenal you know, and I date men
Speaker 4: and women, amazing phenomenal women and men who cherish me
Speaker 4: and treat me great. And I think it's not just
Speaker 4: what you'll tolerate from other people, but it's the boundaries
Speaker 4: that you set with yourself, which is which is your habits,
Speaker 4: which is you know, deciding who you are and not
Speaker 4: wavering from that. So when I tell somebody like, oh, no,
Speaker 4: like I cannot go on a date with you because
Speaker 4: I have to wake up at five am to meditate.
Speaker 4: I can't hang out tonight because it's a full moon
Speaker 4: and I need to ritualize some things. Those little things
Speaker 4: like that teaches people that like, oh, she's got boundaries,
Speaker 4: Oh she's got routines, and I don't get the opportunity
Speaker 4: to take over her life. I get to integrate in it.
Speaker 4: And that's how I approach relationships and partners is to say, hey,
Speaker 4: I'm whole and complete, and I like the variety of
Speaker 4: other humans. Are you also that? Because if so, do
Speaker 4: you want to orbit around each other for a time
Speaker 4: and so so? Yeah, I think for that it's really important.
Speaker 4: And the boundary setting, I think a lot of it,
Speaker 4: and nobody wants to hear it. Is you gotta And
Speaker 4: this is like Christian work. You got to consecrate yourself.
Speaker 4: You have to step back and figure out who you
Speaker 4: are when people aren't telling you who you are. And
Speaker 4: that's what traveling got to do for me. I got
Speaker 4: to to test my identity and see how I show
Speaker 4: up in the world. Who are people telling you were
Speaker 4: before people were telling me that I was anxious, that
Speaker 4: I was too much. I was told that that I
Speaker 4: was smart and would do well in corporate, that I
Speaker 4: wasn't an entrepreneur, that because I decided to be a mother,
Speaker 4: that my life was over, that I was too bubbly,
Speaker 4: too friendly, and so I really would pack that on.
Speaker 4: And again it's not just partners. I remember I used
Speaker 4: to have anxiety so bad that I would faint, Like
Speaker 4: I would just get upset and boom, I'm like on
Speaker 4: the ground, face red. And it was either that or
Speaker 4: like physical violence. And I remember when I came back
Speaker 4: and I had told everybody like like, I'm not who
Speaker 4: y'all thought I was. And I was on the phone
Speaker 4: with my mom and she's like, ooh, that sounds like
Speaker 4: a frustrating thing. You know. Don't don't go doing what
Speaker 4: you're doing, fighting or fainting. And I was like, actually,
Speaker 4: I don't. I don't do that anymore. That's not who
Speaker 4: I am. And she was like mm hm. And so
Speaker 4: from that moment on, I started telling people, Hey, I
Speaker 4: cannot control who you think I am or how you
Speaker 4: see me, but I'm telling you that that's not who
Speaker 4: I am. And you can say whatever the fuck you
Speaker 4: want to say about me behind my back, but don't
Speaker 4: bring that shit to my face. Do not tell me
Speaker 4: who I am to my face. And when they did,
Speaker 4: it was a two year stint where I would be like, Hey,
Speaker 4: you're on that bullshit. You're telling me something that I'm
Speaker 4: telling you I'm not, and I would be like, I'm disengaging,
Speaker 4: and that's where the hr HO probably came from. I started,
Speaker 4: I called it this again. I'm like, I'm going to
Speaker 4: disengage in this conversation. Please don't call me for two weeks,
Speaker 4: and I will hang up anybody's face, mother, anybody, and
Speaker 4: I'll call back in two weeks and say, hey, I
Speaker 4: really love you and I want to move forward, and
Speaker 4: I think the best way is for us to talk
Speaker 4: about what happened two weeks ago. Are you ready to
Speaker 4: have that conversation? Which is really hard thing to do,
Speaker 4: but when you have fell to the depths of hell
Speaker 4: and you're like, I clearly don't love mine and I've
Speaker 4: clearly chosen love and all of these other titles and
Speaker 4: accolades over my authentic self. And you know how sad
Speaker 4: and how dark and how how like lonely. That darkness
Speaker 4: is what you were like. I will never go back
Speaker 4: there again, and I will do whatever it takes. And
Speaker 4: so now my journey is every day, how do I
Speaker 4: become more me? More me? How do I continue to
Speaker 4: test who I am and what I say and believe
Speaker 4: in that and what I've been able to accomplish with
Speaker 4: that finding of self has sometimes I cry because I'm
Speaker 4: just like, I cannot believe that I've been able to
Speaker 4: reprogram my mind and recreate this life in such a
Speaker 4: way that I'm almost unrecognizable. I look younger now than
Speaker 4: I did in pictures when I was twenty three.
Speaker 3: It's insane that shit will aige you.
Speaker 2: Not being happy, not living as yourself, showing up as
Speaker 2: yourself will damn the fuck out of you, Like you
Speaker 2: will start looking like a different person. And that's shit,
Speaker 2: is true. I've seen like pictures of myself an unhappy relationship.
Speaker 3: I'm like, oh, bitch, you're not doing well. Yeah, you
Speaker 3: weren't doing well.
Speaker 4: Yeah you weren't doing well.
Speaker 3: Who would you say you are now?
Speaker 4: I would say now, I'm free, I am free, I
Speaker 4: am authentic, I lean into that. I'm a nurturer and
Speaker 4: I am discerning. I think that I am wise. I
Speaker 4: think that wise enough to know that I don't know
Speaker 4: shit that kind of way. And I think that I
Speaker 4: think that I'm a lover. I think I'm a lover
Speaker 4: of humanity. And before I was afraid of humanity, I
Speaker 4: was I was. I was scared of people and scared
Speaker 4: of interactions and scared of either they would take something
Speaker 4: from me or reject me. And now I live my
Speaker 4: life not requiring acceptance of anyone, but also not denying that.
Speaker 4: And I think that, like I'm like, damn, okay, cool,
Speaker 4: let's go, you know, yeah, and I'm myself.
Speaker 3: Yeah, that's what a beautiful journey.
Speaker 1: I mean, I mean, I feel like this conversation is
Speaker 1: so necessary, I think for both of us, and I
Speaker 1: think for the people listening too, like knowing that like
Speaker 1: it really it's sometimes it's just taking the smallest step
Speaker 1: to finding who you are. And like I know, for
Speaker 1: especially for moms, like you know, some moms, like we
Speaker 1: don't have the luxury of like leaving our kids for
Speaker 1: four months to go find ourselves, you know, Like so
Speaker 1: moms are like.
Speaker 4: Well, how the fuck do I do that? How the
Speaker 4: fuck do I mean, I know, don't. I can't leave
Speaker 4: my child for four months.
Speaker 3: I don't know. If I don't, I couldn't.
Speaker 1: But I know that they're like even me, like today
Speaker 1: saying like, Okay, I need to create space in my life.
Speaker 4: I've been it.
Speaker 1: I have to create space in my life. I have
Speaker 1: to make it a priority, even if I have to
Speaker 1: fucking schedule it.
Speaker 4: In my goddamn Google calendar.
Speaker 3: And you will to do that.
Speaker 1: I think that that's really really important, And because we
Speaker 1: do ourselves such a disservice and suffer so much, like
Speaker 1: just avoiding ourselves and avoiding the work and not setting
Speaker 1: the boundaries. And sometimes boundaries can feel I don't know
Speaker 1: that word, and I think sometimes it gets a bad
Speaker 1: connotation of like negativity or coldness or heartlessness. But I
Speaker 1: think you create so much more space for love and
Speaker 1: light when you have those boundaries.
Speaker 4: Absolutely. And one of the things that and I love
Speaker 4: what you said. A quote come to mind is like
Speaker 4: everywhere you go, there you are, and people got to
Speaker 4: so we gott to stop running from ourselves. But when
Speaker 4: it comes to that boundary setting, I think it's when
Speaker 4: you first start boundaries, you're like, ah, I get away
Speaker 4: from me because you're just like pent up aggression and
Speaker 4: anger and you're trying to protect yourself. But I think
Speaker 4: the deeper you get in your boundaries, the softer you
Speaker 4: can be, and the more you can say, like, it
Speaker 4: doesn't have to be this big blowout, it can just
Speaker 4: be you know, actually this doesn't work for me. Actually
Speaker 4: I'm gonna unsubscribe to this interaction. And you know, learning
Speaker 4: that is the game changer. So one of the things
Speaker 4: that I mean, this is years of therapy and work,
Speaker 4: but I learned that it's okay to be used. I
Speaker 4: want to be used. I want to be used in
Speaker 4: the way that I prescribed I can be used for.
Speaker 4: And so when I can say this is how you could,
Speaker 4: you can empty my vessel right and everything else is
Speaker 4: off limits, then I don't have to feel like a
Speaker 4: bad person for upholding boundaries because you just were out
Speaker 4: of my wheelhouse. So when it comes to you know,
Speaker 4: people wanting to tell me their life story as I'm
Speaker 4: walking down the street because something about me just does that,
Speaker 4: you know, And so then it's like, well, I feel
Speaker 4: bad because I like, I'm a good person and I
Speaker 4: want to help and I actually get invested in people's story.
Speaker 4: But a couple of things. You get invested in people's
Speaker 4: story and their success, and they aren't always invested in
Speaker 4: their own Yes, and so now you've depleted your energy
Speaker 4: and you could have helped somebody who is actually ready.
Speaker 4: So that's why that boundary is important, because your energy
Speaker 4: is finite. So instead of listening to people's stories, I
Speaker 4: have a set of questions, and I'm like, if you
Speaker 4: really want help, you can book a free fifteen minute call,
Speaker 4: and then after that, I'm going to try to sell
Speaker 4: you something a very expensive coaching program, and so very
Speaker 4: like it just is what it is. So then now
Speaker 4: I know that I can live in my purpose because
Speaker 4: I'm not being out of order by constantly being pulled
Speaker 4: to help other people. Because if we went to help
Speaker 4: everyone who needed us, we would never make it out
Speaker 4: of our front door. So we have to learn to
Speaker 4: put our blinders on and to decide who and what
Speaker 4: it is that we pour out to and under what circumstances,
Speaker 4: so that we can then be fruitful in how we
Speaker 4: show up in the world and how we give back.
Speaker 4: So boundaries isn't about shutting people out. It's about walking
Speaker 4: in your purpose and in a way that will actually
Speaker 4: make a difference in the world, and that is that's
Speaker 4: where my mindset coaching comes in, and that's where I'm like, no,
Speaker 4: let's just reframe that. It's not no, I don't want
Speaker 4: to help my mom pay her mortgage. It's I'm using
Speaker 4: this money to send to Haiti because I believe that
Speaker 4: those kids are important and what they need. You know,
Speaker 4: there is that I love my mom. That's just not it.
Speaker 4: That's not what it is. So so I think that's also
Speaker 4: like boundary set setting, you know, one on two one
Speaker 4: one o.
Speaker 3: Two one o two. Yeah.
Speaker 2: Yeah, I think it's important too, like because listening to
Speaker 2: your story and listening to what you're talking about. I
Speaker 2: remember when I first took the steps to like leave
Speaker 2: my baby daddy. It was something like traumatic and big
Speaker 2: like that, and I went went played taughter what you
Speaker 2: taughttered that line a lot. But when I first finally
Speaker 2: got out of it and finally got powered and like
Speaker 2: like okay, I'm here. I took a long time to
Speaker 2: get I knew for a long time it was wrong.
Speaker 2: I took a long time to get here. I remember
Speaker 2: I went out with a guy and he like said
Speaker 2: something crazy to me and my baby Daddy used to
Speaker 2: talk crazy to me, so I was kind of used
Speaker 2: to it, but I was so not in that place anymore.
Speaker 2: I was like, my fangs must have come out. I
Speaker 2: was like, get the fuck out. I'm like, I don't
Speaker 2: know who the fuck. But I was just like, you're
Speaker 2: not gonna send me back to that place by any means.
Speaker 2: But I think sometimes in life, when you are programmed
Speaker 2: a certain way into certain things, you forget you'll get
Speaker 2: in new relationships that are a little bit different. They
Speaker 2: don't look just like that, so you're kind of like
Speaker 2: relaxed in it, but they still like cross your boundaries
Speaker 2: in other way other ways, and you have to be
Speaker 2: like constantly exercising and reevaluating because you can grow, but
Speaker 2: if you let yourself get comfortable, you can still kind
Speaker 2: of totter and teeter into those things that are still
Speaker 2: not quite this but not quite what you need either.
Speaker 3: So I think it's important.
Speaker 2: I'm so happy that you came like reminding, reigniting that fire,
Speaker 2: like there was a place that that stemmed from, and
Speaker 2: that work has to continue to happen and continue to happen,
Speaker 2: or else you can easily fall back into old even
Speaker 2: if it doesn't look just like it. You're being abused,
Speaker 2: or you be allowing some inneverbally abused you, or you
Speaker 2: being so miserable you look ugly, but.
Speaker 4: You were speaking for both of them.
Speaker 3: Yeah, I was talking.
Speaker 2: It's still it's still always lingering, and you have to
Speaker 2: constantly be evaluating the people you keep and why.
Speaker 4: Absolutely, thank you so much. I needed.
Speaker 2: I needed to hear all your information today and definitely
Speaker 2: that crazy ass story about that crazy ass nigga. Don't
Speaker 2: answer dms from niggas from Junior High, don't do it, don't.
Speaker 1: I was going back to read my HR message and
Speaker 1: it was not as direct as that. I was like, wow,
Speaker 1: I really could have fine tuned this more.
Speaker 4: It was not as actually love crafting those messages.
Speaker 1: It sounded like if you took joy in that, and
Speaker 1: can tell I'm sure everywhere was spelled correctly.
Speaker 4: Yes it was my and my you know, like I'm
Speaker 4: a thing for words, But it's not just I don't
Speaker 4: take joy in.
Speaker 3: It joy, but but you do take joy and setting.
Speaker 4: Your boundary and also being a good person about it.
Speaker 4: Because I could do I could do like all these
Speaker 4: other bitches I heard like, I could I could block
Speaker 4: you I could take your money.
Speaker 3: I could do all of that, but you could pick
Speaker 3: up that four thousand dollars.
Speaker 4: I could have picked up that kish But like I
Speaker 4: was like, again, every day, when you're faced with these things,
Speaker 4: this is the opportunity for you to say who you
Speaker 4: are and show up as that. And so I'm like,
Speaker 4: I am a good human I have boundaries. I respect
Speaker 4: other people's boundaries, and I respect other people's humanity. Clearly,
Speaker 4: this nigga is in way over his head with me, right,
Speaker 4: and I called it. I was like, Nah, you could
Speaker 4: just sniff the pussy, not you. You can't see.
Speaker 3: He slapped the goddamn driver.
Speaker 4: He has zero motherfucking boundaries.
Speaker 3: The driver beat his ass.
Speaker 4: Driver react with the no, the driver just took it.
Speaker 3: Oh my god, poor baby. That was not the first time.
Speaker 4: I don't think so oh no, but him. It's also
Speaker 4: it's also like I want to learn, right, and there
Speaker 4: are things that I learned from that, right, we learned
Speaker 4: from every interaction I learned. I do like it when
Speaker 4: somebody's driver picks me up, just not when they slapped
Speaker 4: the driver, right. I do like when someone is very
Speaker 4: attentive and you know, those sort of things. But not
Speaker 4: when they're possessive, and so you learn something from every
Speaker 4: single interaction. And that's why everyone is like, it's all good,
Speaker 4: you know there there I have no no, no heart
Speaker 4: feelings or anything. But it's also like I have a model.
Speaker 4: I leave everything better than I found it, even crazy niggas,
Speaker 4: I will still leave you better than I found you.
Speaker 4: And I want you to know that, like your behavior
Speaker 4: will chase away the woman of your dreams, and so
Speaker 4: to be able to do that and get your words
Speaker 4: across so that they hear the words. Because I used
Speaker 4: to be very angry, very screaming, and then people like,
Speaker 4: don't talk to me like that. You're yelling, and I'm like,
Speaker 4: but you're not listening. And so I've learned that if
Speaker 4: I can maintain my composure and take the anger, because
Speaker 4: anger is not even a real emotions, it's an emotion
Speaker 4: that hides fear or jealousy or anguish. If I can
Speaker 4: take the emotion out and just put it on the table,
Speaker 4: I've been authentic to who I am. And if you
Speaker 4: are open to learning, you just learn acting crazy go
Speaker 4: and lose a real bad.
Speaker 3: Bitch fast fast.
Speaker 4: Right. So yeah, it's boundaries, it's not easy. It's not easy,
Speaker 4: and if I can take two seconds. One of my
Speaker 4: biggest pieces of advice for people who are starting who
Speaker 4: can't say no, I said, I teach the yes and
Speaker 4: have you guys.
Speaker 3: Ever heard of the yes and yes? And I will
Speaker 3: do this for you.
Speaker 4: Right like you set the parameter, you know, like can
Speaker 4: I borrow your car? Yes? And you will need to
Speaker 4: pay my car note for six months. And people be like,
Speaker 4: well I only need to borrow your car for twenty minutes.
Speaker 3: Okay, Well I guess you don't need it.
Speaker 4: I guess you don't need it. Like it's low key
Speaker 4: game of like how bad do you want it? But
Speaker 4: it's it's it's boundary setting for beginners. It's saying like,
Speaker 4: I don't want to be displeased, but let me tell
Speaker 4: you at what level I will be comfortable with you
Speaker 4: using me in the way that you want to use me? Yes,
Speaker 4: you can?
Speaker 1: Why Because this is what it's gonna calls people who
Speaker 1: don't have problems setting boundaries yes as part of it's
Speaker 1: just part of their every day intuitive dialogue.
Speaker 3: So the and is where? But that and is? It's
Speaker 3: hard even then even with the yes, if you're scared,
Speaker 3: like yes, and can you pay my car? Not for right?
Speaker 4: Right, And so when I when I'm coaching my people,
Speaker 4: I'm like, and after you say your and bitch, don't
Speaker 4: say shit, ain't nothe necessary, don't explain nothing, nothing to explain.
Speaker 4: And and that's another one my ratchet affirmations. Noah is
Speaker 4: a full last motherfucking sentence. But yes, yes you can
Speaker 4: do this right. And when it comes to like dating,
Speaker 4: and guys typically wanting to be able to date other women,
Speaker 4: but they don't want the women to do that, and
Speaker 4: I'm very quick to be like, yes, you can fuck
Speaker 4: other bitches and I will too. The paulse nothing else
Speaker 4: to say, and then they can make that decision. But
Speaker 4: when you make that and what feels good for you,
Speaker 4: and I do it in business, yes I can teach
Speaker 4: this class and even when you know, I'm so excited
Speaker 4: to be here, but I also have a life. Yes
Speaker 4: I can come, and these are the times that I'm available.
Speaker 4: So that way, when I walk away from this, I
Speaker 4: feel invigorated, I feel excited, and I don't feel like
Speaker 4: anyone took something from me that I wasn't giving. Yes,
Speaker 4: you can have what you want and this is the price.
Speaker 4: And most of the time, you realize that people make
Speaker 4: you feel like you were their last resort. And here
Speaker 4: comes another ratch of affirmation. You were not that suckers
Speaker 4: last resort. You were only the most convenient one. Make
Speaker 4: it not so convenient to use the fuck out of
Speaker 4: you as No, but.
Speaker 3: I needed all of those but thank you.
Speaker 4: You know.
Speaker 2: I would pass. You have all my money, all the
Speaker 2: cash I got, you got memo.
Speaker 3: Oh my gosh.
Speaker 1: Okay, Well, we usually end our episodes with our guests
Speaker 1: in a horri.
Speaker 3: And I feel like that ship was the horror.
Speaker 4: I mean I gave that was the horror.
Speaker 1: I just feel like you are a plethora of story,
Speaker 1: so I'm going to drain all of you.
Speaker 2: Yes, yes, we want more, well do you? But Jamila,
Speaker 2: you said you have a horri Why the fuck do
Speaker 2: you remember my my common volunteered.
Speaker 3: It's a quick one, so it'll be quick.
Speaker 4: Who stories.
Speaker 2: I was on Priman, which is a popular hiking mountain
Speaker 2: here in l A. And I was with the guy
Speaker 2: and we went on I was like going on the back,
Speaker 2: the back trail because I'm from LA.
Speaker 3: I know the back trail. And then we were like buy.
Speaker 2: A tree, and I was like, you want to eat
Speaker 2: my pussy and he's like, okay, so you got to ask.
Speaker 2: And then he just sat me up on a very
Speaker 2: convenient tree and I just scooted my biker shorts down
Speaker 2: at my pussy a. I was like looking at looking
Speaker 2: at the view, and I was like trying to Matt
Speaker 2: like I was feeling good. I was trying to like
Speaker 2: manifest a house in the hills, but I was getting
Speaker 2: a pissya and it was great. And then I was like,
Speaker 2: this is so nice. I love asking for what I want.
Speaker 2: And then I got down and as soon as I
Speaker 2: put my pants up, a guy walked by and I
Speaker 2: was like, look at God.
Speaker 3: And that's it. That was That was the story.
Speaker 2: Asked for what you want, even if it's getting ahead. Yeah,
Speaker 2: I hate that word if it's used towards me. But
Speaker 2: he was obedient, right, So good.
Speaker 4: Thank you?
Speaker 3: Yeah that's what I did.
Speaker 4: Thank you for sharing.
Speaker 2: You're welcome. So you want to tell all of our
Speaker 2: listeners where they can find all this amazingness.
Speaker 4: Yeah, well they won't find these kind of stories. Pay
Speaker 4: I typically stay away from relationships. I think I've been
Speaker 4: holding this for.
Speaker 3: I'm so grateful we got the exclusive drop y'all.
Speaker 4: Y'all have heard you said you heard a lot of podcasts.
Speaker 4: You've never heard any of these things. No, the energy
Speaker 4: in this room, I'm like, let me just tell my
Speaker 4: hotels to my roof.
Speaker 2: Can we put this can be on a group chat
Speaker 2: because now I need to know all of your ship.
Speaker 4: Last night when but yes, thank you so much. I
Speaker 4: can be found on Instagram as trap yoga bay that's
Speaker 4: t R A P y O G A B A
Speaker 4: E and really on all platforms that way. And if
Speaker 4: you get confused, like google me bitch. And if you
Speaker 4: guys are in La, make sure you come to her
Speaker 4: class on October nineteenth through the twenty third, and then
Speaker 4: I'll be in Philadelphia on the eleven through the six
Speaker 4: of November. And if you so happened to be in Cali,
Speaker 4: Colombia or Cabo, hit me up because I'll be teaching
Speaker 4: at some private events there.
Speaker 3: But I can always Oh wait, Colombia. Do I need
Speaker 3: to go to Colombia?
Speaker 4: Yes you do?
Speaker 2: She I want to go to Columbia for a variety
Speaker 2: of ratchet and wellness reasons.
Speaker 4: Like, honestly, I should just start traveling with y'all, because honestly,
Speaker 4: I have not learned my lesson about important dick. I
Speaker 4: still do not. You know what.
Speaker 2: Everywhere I go still Erica has taught me bring a
Speaker 2: vibrator like travel essentials, bring a vibrator.
Speaker 4: Even if even if you never hooked up overseas, what
Speaker 4: you'd just be bringing them in. Yeah, we didn't learn
Speaker 4: your lesson from rotating never hood bit. I've never hooked
Speaker 4: that I'm going to empower you. I've always just.
Speaker 3: Tried some foreign dick.
Speaker 4: It is because my best friend said, thorn dick, don't.
Speaker 2: Count it, don't it does out of state lines.
Speaker 4: Thorn dick might make you stay in the foreign country
Speaker 4: that you're at being gonea like fuck y'all a.
Speaker 3: Prince far.
Speaker 2: Also speaking of going on trips and finding yourself, we
Speaker 2: are doing our retreat in Costa Rica, and by the
Speaker 2: time this comes out, we will have put out the
Speaker 2: first round of people who we've invited to come. So
Speaker 2: be sure to look out for that email and put
Speaker 2: your money's in to reserve your spot, because we would
Speaker 2: love to grow and get well with you on the
Speaker 2: coast of Caribbean, Costa Rica.
Speaker 4: Maybe a little trap yoga and I'll promise I won't
Speaker 4: bring them dick.
Speaker 2: Oh there's all women, so you can't bring dick, but
Speaker 2: we do encourage you.
Speaker 3: Ton't find the locals, there's the local dick I found some.
Speaker 4: Leave it to Erica scavenger hunt I found.
Speaker 2: What if we tell our community, like, invite your nick
Speaker 2: us to Coasta Rica during this time.
Speaker 3: You can only see them during these days.
Speaker 4: No, there's plenty of dick on.
Speaker 2: Please please come with us trap yoga bay I know,
Speaker 2: Oh my god, it'll be so fun.
Speaker 1: Love to But you guys know where to find us.
Speaker 1: Good Mom's Bad Choices on all platforms. Make sure you
Speaker 1: follow us on Instagram at Good Mom's Underscore Bad Choices.
Speaker 3: Check out our Patreon.
Speaker 4: I've been like uploading little blog posts up there because
Speaker 4: I've been in my fields all week. So I've been
Speaker 4: like crying on Patreon. So you know, gosh with your
Speaker 4: girls in love on Patreon. That's patreon dot com. Backslash
Speaker 4: Good Mom's Bad Choices and have a good day.
Speaker 3: Bye bye