WEBVTT - Boundaries 101 Feat. Trap Yoga Bae

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<v Speaker 1>Welcome back to Good Mom's Bad Choices. I'm Erica and

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<v Speaker 1>I'm Meela.

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<v Speaker 2>Happy Wednesday, Happy meda fucking Wednesday.

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<v Speaker 3>How you doing bo I'm doing good.

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<v Speaker 2>I'm doing good. How are you?

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<v Speaker 3>I'm good.

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<v Speaker 4>I'm good. It's the last week of September. I'm ready

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<v Speaker 4>to get the fuck out of September.

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<v Speaker 2>I am except finally, oddly, the weather in la is changing,

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<v Speaker 2>and I'm offended as fuck. It's like been gloomy for

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<v Speaker 2>two days. I'm like, who the fuck do you think

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<v Speaker 2>you are?

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<v Speaker 1>I'm happy because it's been too goddamn hot. We live

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<v Speaker 1>in the valley, y'all, and it's disrespectful when it comes

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<v Speaker 1>to the heat. There was like a mini fire the

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<v Speaker 1>other day. I was like, oh shit, here we go

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<v Speaker 1>again every year, every year.

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<v Speaker 4>But yeah, other than that, I feel good.

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<v Speaker 2>I'm feeling like there's I mean, obviously the seasons are changing,

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<v Speaker 2>but it's just me that I feel like when the

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<v Speaker 2>seasons changed, something is always like conjuring up a shift,

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<v Speaker 2>and the energy too. I feel like shits, pop it off.

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<v Speaker 2>And we've been busy. Erica was blind yesterday. She's had

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<v Speaker 2>a hard week.

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<v Speaker 3>I was legally blind.

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<v Speaker 2>She came in today. She's like, yeah, yesterday I was blind.

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<v Speaker 3>I was like, oh real, I was. I got it.

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<v Speaker 1>I woke up and I couldn't see shit. It was

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<v Speaker 1>like blurry, and I was like, what the fuck is

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<v Speaker 1>going on? And then I put I drops in and

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<v Speaker 1>I was like, this will for sure work.

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<v Speaker 3>Nope.

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<v Speaker 1>Then I got in the car and I was like, bitch,

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<v Speaker 1>I can't see. And then I had to looked it

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<v Speaker 1>up on Google. Could barely see the Google and it

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<v Speaker 1>said that you probably have dry eyes. So then I

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<v Speaker 1>went to the store. I got the lubricant. That shit

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<v Speaker 1>didn't work.

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<v Speaker 4>I drove to my friend near Lynd shout out to

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<v Speaker 4>Nearland's Bridal Shower.

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<v Speaker 3>I barely got there, and then.

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<v Speaker 4>I yeah, I just had to just submit to the

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<v Speaker 4>fact that I couldn't see all day.

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<v Speaker 1>My mom won't me to have dinner with her last night.

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<v Speaker 1>I was like, Mom, I can't drive to you, like

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<v Speaker 1>I need to go close my eyes. Erica's had a

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<v Speaker 1>hard week, so my body's breaking down.

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<v Speaker 4>Guys.

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<v Speaker 2>I went to the whiz Kid concert over the weekend,

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<v Speaker 2>and at first I told Erica, but then I was like,

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<v Speaker 2>she's having a hard week. Let me just tell Ashley.

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<v Speaker 2>I was like, you know, Ashley, she's having.

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<v Speaker 4>A heart week.

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<v Speaker 2>You should come to Like, I've been waiting all week

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<v Speaker 2>for you to call me. She's like I called in

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<v Speaker 2>the morning. She's like, I hope you're calling me to

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<v Speaker 2>tell me we have tickets. I'm like, yes, i am.

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<v Speaker 2>And we had a good time. Wiz Kid in concert

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<v Speaker 2>with a live band.

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<v Speaker 4>Bitch.

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<v Speaker 2>First of all, all the blacks were at the fucking

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<v Speaker 2>Wilturn in line. It was beautiful Africans and the African

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<v Speaker 2>car black people.

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<v Speaker 3>I was like, oh my god, this is where.

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<v Speaker 2>I belong at the wiz Kid concert. I saw all

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<v Speaker 2>my friends there.

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<v Speaker 3>I was even jealous. I was like, you know what,

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<v Speaker 3>I knew you were. I was like, it was so Spotify.

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<v Speaker 3>It was so much fun.

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<v Speaker 4>I dance.

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<v Speaker 2>We took a little little mushroom chocolate. Thanks Alana. That

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<v Speaker 2>mushroom chocolate was hitting, so we gave me a little piece.

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<v Speaker 2>Right when Essence came on and I shit hit. I

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<v Speaker 2>was like, thank you God, thank you God, Oh my God.

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<v Speaker 2>And then on the way there, you know, shout out

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<v Speaker 2>to Cashley. She's always ordering the luxe the luxe lived.

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<v Speaker 4>Yeah, I was like, wow, this is so classy.

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<v Speaker 2>Anyway, the driver was talking to us, and I don't

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<v Speaker 2>know what are we talking about. We're talking about open relationships,

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<v Speaker 2>and like, I just I want a main nigga who

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<v Speaker 2>also lets me sometimes sleep with other people. What the

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<v Speaker 2>fuck is so hard about that? He's like, well, me

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<v Speaker 2>and my girl have been together for five years. It's

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<v Speaker 2>the best relationship I've ever had, and we sleep with

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<v Speaker 2>other people all the time.

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<v Speaker 3>It's healthy competition.

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<v Speaker 2>After she goes and sleeps with someone, I'm always like, yeah,

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<v Speaker 2>let me bust it down so she knows who's daddy.

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<v Speaker 3>I'm like, that's right. Blue.

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<v Speaker 2>He's like, he's like, let me tell you where you

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<v Speaker 2>go if you want to find more open minded people.

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<v Speaker 2>We're like where He's like, Bar Sinister. Here goes Ashley.

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<v Speaker 2>I put it in my notes. I'm like, well, he's like, yeah,

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<v Speaker 2>there's a girl there with blue hair. I'm let me

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<v Speaker 2>show you her Instagram asked for her till I blue

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<v Speaker 2>scent you. I was like, thank you, fucking Blue. Guess

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<v Speaker 2>where we went after the wiz K concert, Bar Sinister. Yes,

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<v Speaker 2>we did go to Bar Sinister.

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<v Speaker 3>What are they doing there?

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<v Speaker 2>Okay, well there's a long line on the other side.

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<v Speaker 2>But I went in the back and there's a clear door.

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<v Speaker 2>And back there they're doing like a BDSM demo through

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<v Speaker 2>a clear door.

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<v Speaker 3>Wait, wait, my bad, Like I'm getting the babysitter next weekend.

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<v Speaker 3>Let's go bar sinister, bitch. Thank ye apparently right in

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<v Speaker 3>bar sinister. What the fuck? So I'm I had a

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<v Speaker 3>really good night.

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<v Speaker 2>It was fun. I wasn't super hung over the next day,

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<v Speaker 2>but I just yeah, I've had a good weekend.

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<v Speaker 3>It's been a whild week.

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<v Speaker 2>We've been busy, which brings me to our tarot card.

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<v Speaker 2>Today we pulled the eight of brooms, and the eight

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<v Speaker 2>of brooms means I actually pulled another one and I

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<v Speaker 2>didn't like that one, But then I pulled this one,

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<v Speaker 2>and it's very accurate. Movement, fast paced change, action, alignment,

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<v Speaker 2>and air travel. This one says that the eight of

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<v Speaker 2>ones it can mark significant delays, particularly concerning travel or

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<v Speaker 2>fast moving plans. Despite having a lot of energy enthusiasm

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<v Speaker 2>to progress things forward, you now face multiple obstacles in

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<v Speaker 2>your course.

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<v Speaker 3>Wait, did I pick up the wrong one? This that

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<v Speaker 3>was reversed? Oh okay, okay, that we did not reverse.

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<v Speaker 3>We need it regularly.

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<v Speaker 2>That was regular Wait, sorry, we regularly It wasn't reverse.

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<v Speaker 2>It invites you to be laser focused with your intentions

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<v Speaker 2>and actions, determine what you want to manifest, and then

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<v Speaker 2>align all of your resources and energy to folks becus

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<v Speaker 2>on the singular goal, remove all distractions and devote yourself

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<v Speaker 2>to the task with total concentration, determination, and will. This

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<v Speaker 2>experience can be highly productive, allowing you to accomplish a

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<v Speaker 2>lot in a short time. The other one that I

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<v Speaker 2>picked up that it said it said the eight of

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<v Speaker 2>Wance represents rapid movement forward applied to your career. This

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<v Speaker 2>principle can mean rapid movement in the literal or figurative

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<v Speaker 2>sense physically. The card can sometimes indicate that you're about

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<v Speaker 2>to take a business triph. Eric and I are about

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<v Speaker 2>to go to New York. It's mostly pleasure, but we're

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<v Speaker 2>going to do some business and we're going to the

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<v Speaker 2>Hardersoft podcast, So shout out to them for their show.

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<v Speaker 2>So hopefully we see people. And we've been really feeling

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<v Speaker 2>super busy and so I feel like that card was

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<v Speaker 2>pretty accurate.

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<v Speaker 3>Amen.

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<v Speaker 2>Amen.

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<v Speaker 1>Well, I would love to introduce you guys to this

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<v Speaker 1>week's guest. We have Brittany Floyd Mayo aka Trap yoga

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<v Speaker 1>bay that flows off the tong a little easier for me.

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<v Speaker 1>She is a four break yoga instructor, mindset coach.

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<v Speaker 4>Masters holders that the way you say, you know, bitch

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<v Speaker 4>is master's level educating.

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<v Speaker 3>Master's level educated.

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<v Speaker 1>She's smarter than us, bitches. That's why she's here for

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<v Speaker 1>her back to school month.

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<v Speaker 3>Okay, teach, teach us your ways.

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<v Speaker 4>He just britain A.

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<v Speaker 3>Please, welcome to the show.

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<v Speaker 4>Thank you for having me. I'm super excited.

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<v Speaker 3>I'm so excited.

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<v Speaker 1>I've been stalking you and I'm like, oh my god.

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<v Speaker 1>She has a class coming up in LA on October

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<v Speaker 1>nineteenth through the twenty third. I think yeah, And I

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<v Speaker 1>was like, a bitch needs to go to work and

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<v Speaker 1>do some yoga asap.

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<v Speaker 3>I wish the shit was like this week.

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<v Speaker 4>Okay, you know what, Oddly enough, I got you on

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<v Speaker 4>the virtual side. I was teaching a virtual class on

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<v Speaker 4>the thirtieth of September. And it's fun because you get

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<v Speaker 4>to choose if you want to be on screen or

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<v Speaker 4>if you want to be off and the people on

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<v Speaker 4>screen I actually interact with. So there will be hundreds

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<v Speaker 4>of people in the class, but maybe like fifty and

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<v Speaker 4>like when they give up. I'll be like, bitch, get

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<v Speaker 4>your ass up AND's work. Throw that ass and hill

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<v Speaker 4>of circle? What are you doing?

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<v Speaker 3>I throw that circle? What are you doing?

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<v Speaker 4>So?

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<v Speaker 1>Yeah, I love that. Wow, that's amazing. Well, thank you

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<v Speaker 1>for coming onto this show.

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<v Speaker 3>I know that you have.

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<v Speaker 1>You know, we always ask our guests to share an affirmation.

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<v Speaker 1>I know you have your ratchet affirmations, so I would

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<v Speaker 1>love for you to share one with our with our people.

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<v Speaker 4>It's so hard to pick one. I think with like

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<v Speaker 4>with the way y'all's podcast works, A cute, simple one

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<v Speaker 4>like I am a priority in my beautiful ass life.

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<v Speaker 4>You know it really works and something that's resonating with

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<v Speaker 4>me right now. You ask for one, but I'm extra

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<v Speaker 4>as fuck. I'm gonna give you two. It's you can

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<v Speaker 4>accept someone for who they are and not fuck with

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<v Speaker 4>them for the very same reason. Yes, as we enter

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<v Speaker 4>this retrograde and you know what I mean.

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<v Speaker 3>Both of those speak to me. Both of those. Wait,

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<v Speaker 3>what was the first one?

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<v Speaker 4>It was I am a priority and it's beautiful in

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<v Speaker 4>my ownership, it's yours in my beautiful ass life.

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<v Speaker 1>I am a priority in my beautiful ass life.

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<v Speaker 3>Yes, like a.

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<v Speaker 1>Choir that speaks to me because I've like been not

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<v Speaker 1>feeling like a priority and yeah, and like literally the

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<v Speaker 1>past week, my body has been betraying me. Yeah, but

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<v Speaker 1>in the blindness, and it has been been like, bitch,

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<v Speaker 1>we can't do this anymore.

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<v Speaker 3>Like this no longer.

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<v Speaker 4>I heard your story. You know sometimes what you're experiencing

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<v Speaker 4>with your eyes. Because I'm also a mid school drop out,

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<v Speaker 4>it might be a migraine. Migraines can cause.

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<v Speaker 3>My head was really hurting.

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<v Speaker 4>You're not always really Sometimes it's orbs. Sometimes it's temporary blindness.

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<v Speaker 4>So just something to see.

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<v Speaker 3>I told you I was temporary blind. She was laughed.

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<v Speaker 3>She always laughs at my pain. Laughed at you. You're like,

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<v Speaker 3>I'm like, bitch.

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<v Speaker 4>I was like, really not, but I'm devastated. I don't

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<v Speaker 4>feel good.

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<v Speaker 3>I'm awkward.

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<v Speaker 2>I don't know how to if that's not me laughing

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<v Speaker 2>at your pain, it's everything awkward. I just laugh my

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<v Speaker 2>natural response to things. I care about. Your temporary blind.

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<v Speaker 1>I was like, bitch, I'm legally blind. I was like,

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<v Speaker 1>is this what it feels like when people need glasses?

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<v Speaker 3>Yes, bitch, it's not fun.

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<v Speaker 2>That's how I feel if I don't have a contact

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<v Speaker 2>in I'm probably gonna get robbed. I see anything, can't identify.

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<v Speaker 4>I lost my glasses once and went six months without them.

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<v Speaker 4>And when I got new glasses because I couldn't drive

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<v Speaker 4>I have a stigmatism, I put them on and I

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<v Speaker 4>like cried. I was like wow. I was like, the

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<v Speaker 4>world is an age? Did you like this?

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<v Speaker 3>Shit is beautiful?

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<v Speaker 4>It's crazy?

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<v Speaker 3>Oh my god.

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<v Speaker 2>I value my vision so much that I don't even

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<v Speaker 2>really like wearing sunglasses. If I'm in a beautiful place,

0:09:29.640 --> 0:09:31.120
<v Speaker 2>I'm wearing sunglasses, like, bitch, take them off.

0:09:31.160 --> 0:09:33.439
<v Speaker 1>You gotta see this. I got to see it for

0:09:33.480 --> 0:09:35.120
<v Speaker 1>what it actually looks like. I can't see it through this.

0:09:35.600 --> 0:09:37.679
<v Speaker 1>I will never take my vision for granted again. But

0:09:38.320 --> 0:09:41.240
<v Speaker 1>their affirmation is something that I This week, I was like, okay,

0:09:41.280 --> 0:09:45.320
<v Speaker 1>this week, I'm after you leave today, I am going

0:09:45.360 --> 0:09:47.800
<v Speaker 1>to go through my calendar for the week and really

0:09:48.400 --> 0:09:52.240
<v Speaker 1>block off time for myself, specifically in the day, even

0:09:52.280 --> 0:09:53.960
<v Speaker 1>if it's just twenty minutes. I don't give a fuck

0:09:54.000 --> 0:09:56.600
<v Speaker 1>what I'm doing. I have to stop and do something

0:09:56.640 --> 0:09:58.720
<v Speaker 1>for myself because I don't know how to.

0:09:58.760 --> 0:10:01.240
<v Speaker 3>I'm I don't mean doing that, I don't be doing that.

0:10:01.320 --> 0:10:04.240
<v Speaker 3>I just like work, work, work, work, work, work, work, work, work,

0:10:04.520 --> 0:10:07.120
<v Speaker 3>And I wake up and I'm like, work work work.

0:10:07.960 --> 0:10:10.280
<v Speaker 4>Yeah, you get into those bathroom You're like, I think

0:10:10.280 --> 0:10:12.720
<v Speaker 4>I cuddled my laptop last night.

0:10:12.880 --> 0:10:13.800
<v Speaker 3>Literally it's more.

0:10:15.440 --> 0:10:15.680
<v Speaker 4>Heat.

0:10:15.920 --> 0:10:21.640
<v Speaker 3>It was hard, hard, hard, new day.

0:10:22.280 --> 0:10:25.000
<v Speaker 4>And I'm an accountability partner. That's a lot of what

0:10:25.080 --> 0:10:27.200
<v Speaker 4>I do. So I'm gonna follow up with you ask okay,

0:10:27.280 --> 0:10:28.200
<v Speaker 4>please do please.

0:10:29.720 --> 0:10:31.840
<v Speaker 2>What was the second one? The second infirmation?

0:10:32.120 --> 0:10:34.560
<v Speaker 4>Yeah, you can accept someone for who they are and

0:10:34.600 --> 0:10:36.319
<v Speaker 4>not funk with them for the very same reason.

0:10:36.679 --> 0:10:39.560
<v Speaker 2>You can accept someone for who they are and not

0:10:39.800 --> 0:10:43.280
<v Speaker 2>fuck with them for the same reason that mine might be.

0:10:43.400 --> 0:10:48.120
<v Speaker 2>For me, it'sating deep because I love everybody.

0:10:48.200 --> 0:10:48.760
<v Speaker 3>I'm a cancer.

0:10:48.800 --> 0:10:51.880
<v Speaker 2>I be loving everybody, and yeah, I get attached to

0:10:52.120 --> 0:10:53.040
<v Speaker 2>people for no reason.

0:10:53.640 --> 0:10:54.800
<v Speaker 4>I forgot to say bye to that girl.

0:10:54.840 --> 0:10:57.400
<v Speaker 3>She's like who the crime made? Met in the bathroom,

0:10:57.440 --> 0:10:59.640
<v Speaker 3>So you don't know her. I'm like, I do, but

0:10:59.720 --> 0:10:59.920
<v Speaker 3>I do.

0:11:00.040 --> 0:11:01.640
<v Speaker 4>Oh, I looked in her eyes.

0:11:02.040 --> 0:11:05.320
<v Speaker 3>We made friends her Instagram. She told me about her

0:11:05.360 --> 0:11:07.439
<v Speaker 3>dead grandma. Now I have to check in on her.

0:11:07.640 --> 0:11:11.000
<v Speaker 4>I'm like, oh lord, oh, that's a lot of energy output.

0:11:11.440 --> 0:11:12.120
<v Speaker 3>That is a lot of.

0:11:12.200 --> 0:11:16.040
<v Speaker 2>Energetical I am trying to manage my energetic output and

0:11:16.160 --> 0:11:18.920
<v Speaker 2>be more like conscious of it because I just do

0:11:19.000 --> 0:11:21.440
<v Speaker 2>it so naturally. And then I'm like, bitch, what's wrong

0:11:21.480 --> 0:11:23.559
<v Speaker 2>with you? That's what's wrong with you. You're doing a lot

0:11:23.559 --> 0:11:24.480
<v Speaker 2>of energetic output.

0:11:25.200 --> 0:11:25.760
<v Speaker 3>Do some input.

0:11:25.840 --> 0:11:28.520
<v Speaker 2>You need to chield the fuck out input. But it's

0:11:28.600 --> 0:11:30.960
<v Speaker 2>just like it's so in my nature. But I'm you know,

0:11:31.040 --> 0:11:34.800
<v Speaker 2>reprogramming as an adult is really really, really hard, but

0:11:34.920 --> 0:11:37.439
<v Speaker 2>I'm learning. That's my back to school lesson. Bitch, you

0:11:37.440 --> 0:11:39.960
<v Speaker 2>can be always lessons outside of yourself. The lessons really

0:11:40.200 --> 0:11:41.720
<v Speaker 2>start and end with yourself.

0:11:41.880 --> 0:11:45.120
<v Speaker 4>That is the answer, right, right, So how did you

0:11:45.440 --> 0:11:48.560
<v Speaker 4>get into where you are now and your purpose and

0:11:48.600 --> 0:11:49.199
<v Speaker 4>walking in purpose?

0:11:49.200 --> 0:11:50.480
<v Speaker 3>So I did some I did do a little bit

0:11:50.480 --> 0:11:51.840
<v Speaker 3>of research on you and listen to.

0:11:51.880 --> 0:11:55.400
<v Speaker 1>A few podcasts and learned about your history with violence

0:11:55.840 --> 0:11:58.920
<v Speaker 1>as a young girl and child, and like having to

0:11:59.000 --> 0:12:02.680
<v Speaker 1>unlearn those things, like Jamila said, like un learning things

0:12:02.800 --> 0:12:06.680
<v Speaker 1>after like a certain age can feel really challenging. It's

0:12:06.920 --> 0:12:10.280
<v Speaker 1>really impossible at times. So can you just share kind

0:12:10.280 --> 0:12:12.439
<v Speaker 1>of like you know, your journey to trap Yoka Bay.

0:12:12.920 --> 0:12:14.840
<v Speaker 3>Yes, in a nutshell in a shell.

0:12:14.679 --> 0:12:17.560
<v Speaker 4>Right, boom, bullet points. So what happened was in the

0:12:17.600 --> 0:12:22.200
<v Speaker 4>year was twenty twelve. Seriously, it was twenty fifteen. I

0:12:22.280 --> 0:12:26.080
<v Speaker 4>was married, I have two children. We were living in Austin, Texas.

0:12:27.520 --> 0:12:28.559
<v Speaker 3>You were married, brother young?

0:12:28.679 --> 0:12:31.640
<v Speaker 4>Right, Yeah, I got married at nineteen doors at twenty seven.

0:12:32.040 --> 0:12:33.760
<v Speaker 4>Honestly I heard that's the way to do it, because

0:12:33.800 --> 0:12:37.520
<v Speaker 4>now I'm thirty three, and I'm like, you know, but

0:12:38.480 --> 0:12:41.640
<v Speaker 4>I had gotten to an argument with my husband, which

0:12:41.720 --> 0:12:45.120
<v Speaker 4>wasn't unlike us, but was unlike him was to put

0:12:45.120 --> 0:12:47.760
<v Speaker 4>his hands on me, and that day he like snapped

0:12:47.800 --> 0:12:51.520
<v Speaker 4>and brutally beat me, and I like didn't like, I

0:12:51.559 --> 0:12:53.880
<v Speaker 4>was in shock, went to sleep, had this like crazy

0:12:53.960 --> 0:12:56.160
<v Speaker 4>dream and woke up and was like, nah, like this

0:12:56.320 --> 0:12:59.760
<v Speaker 4>just thing they say, what like what God has planned

0:12:59.800 --> 0:13:02.679
<v Speaker 4>for me? So I was like hit him with the YO,

0:13:02.880 --> 0:13:06.600
<v Speaker 4>I'm going to Walmart R. I put the kids in

0:13:06.679 --> 0:13:09.680
<v Speaker 4>the car, I grabbed my dirty clothes out of the garage,

0:13:10.040 --> 0:13:12.679
<v Speaker 4>and I drove thirty two hours from Austin, Texas back

0:13:12.720 --> 0:13:15.720
<v Speaker 4>home to Oakland, California, where I had When I left,

0:13:15.720 --> 0:13:17.400
<v Speaker 4>I was like, yeah, I'm a Christian now and like

0:13:17.480 --> 0:13:19.720
<v Speaker 4>I just don't do this secular stuff. My friend was like, oh,

0:13:19.840 --> 0:13:21.599
<v Speaker 4>mich when I came back and was like yeah, he

0:13:21.679 --> 0:13:23.000
<v Speaker 4>wasn't that great? Was he was?

0:13:23.440 --> 0:13:25.560
<v Speaker 3>Oh? Was he was? He like religious?

0:13:25.559 --> 0:13:27.959
<v Speaker 4>Oh? We were Pentecostal, hardcore or I didn't curse. I

0:13:27.960 --> 0:13:28.800
<v Speaker 4>didn't wear pants.

0:13:28.880 --> 0:13:31.240
<v Speaker 3>You didn't wear pants. It was from that. Wow.

0:13:31.280 --> 0:13:34.160
<v Speaker 2>Okay, well did you grow did you grow up that way?

0:13:34.600 --> 0:13:38.559
<v Speaker 2>And then you met him and.

0:13:35.640 --> 0:13:41.040
<v Speaker 4>The Jesus as your Lord and savior? Okay, that is

0:13:41.360 --> 0:13:45.160
<v Speaker 4>some demon dick, demon dick. Yes, two kids, Come on,

0:13:46.200 --> 0:13:46.439
<v Speaker 4>I came.

0:13:46.679 --> 0:13:48.280
<v Speaker 3>You were wearing pants. You weren't wearing pants.

0:13:48.320 --> 0:13:51.320
<v Speaker 4>I wasn't wearing pain, not cursing. That's I wasn't listening

0:13:51.360 --> 0:13:53.600
<v Speaker 4>to the secular music. That's what I called it, like

0:13:53.920 --> 0:13:56.920
<v Speaker 4>Beyonce what, I don't know what it was. It was

0:13:57.120 --> 0:14:00.240
<v Speaker 4>at Ordeal. It was yes, very cult like life. And

0:14:00.320 --> 0:14:02.600
<v Speaker 4>so I was laying on my grandmother's floor and me

0:14:02.600 --> 0:14:04.440
<v Speaker 4>and my grandma don't even get along. She was like, yo,

0:14:04.559 --> 0:14:06.600
<v Speaker 4>what the fuck like when you're gonna get the fuck

0:14:06.679 --> 0:14:10.480
<v Speaker 4>out of here? And I had had some savings from

0:14:10.480 --> 0:14:12.840
<v Speaker 4>my job. I was in tech, so I was in recruiting,

0:14:12.960 --> 0:14:15.000
<v Speaker 4>had made me good money and was like, I need

0:14:15.000 --> 0:14:18.360
<v Speaker 4>to find myself and I am not being a good mom.

0:14:18.440 --> 0:14:19.920
<v Speaker 4>I am just like sitting these kids in front of

0:14:19.960 --> 0:14:23.160
<v Speaker 4>the TV. I'm just feeding them. I'm lost. God, I'm

0:14:23.160 --> 0:14:25.120
<v Speaker 4>about to dip and I let y'all know when I

0:14:25.200 --> 0:14:28.800
<v Speaker 4>fucking find me. And so I booked a flight China, India, Brazil.

0:14:29.400 --> 0:14:31.760
<v Speaker 4>I was gone. Yeah. So I studied at the how

0:14:31.760 --> 0:14:34.400
<v Speaker 4>do You Own? School of Vinyasin Rashikasha, India, where I

0:14:34.400 --> 0:14:37.440
<v Speaker 4>became a certified yoga instructor. Then I went on to Shanghai.

0:14:37.520 --> 0:14:40.640
<v Speaker 4>Then I went on to Brazil and once I like

0:14:40.760 --> 0:14:43.000
<v Speaker 4>was like, I found me and can nobody tell me shit?

0:14:43.400 --> 0:14:45.840
<v Speaker 4>I came back home and was basically like yo yo, yo,

0:14:45.960 --> 0:14:48.440
<v Speaker 4>yo yo. So that person you thought you knew the

0:14:48.520 --> 0:14:50.480
<v Speaker 4>bitch is dead.

0:14:51.320 --> 0:14:54.600
<v Speaker 3>Where your kids like, mama.

0:14:53.720 --> 0:14:58.280
<v Speaker 4>Oh, it's probably why. Yeah, No, I came back different, different,

0:14:58.480 --> 0:15:02.920
<v Speaker 4>But what was They were two and six? Okay, so

0:15:02.960 --> 0:15:05.400
<v Speaker 4>my son doesn't have My son was two. He doesn't

0:15:05.440 --> 0:15:08.120
<v Speaker 4>have as much recollection my daughter did. But the thing

0:15:08.320 --> 0:15:11.760
<v Speaker 4>was there was some For a moment, I put her

0:15:11.800 --> 0:15:15.040
<v Speaker 4>in therapy and that was really really good for her.

0:15:15.480 --> 0:15:18.760
<v Speaker 4>And then when I became happier, I noticed my kids

0:15:18.760 --> 0:15:21.560
<v Speaker 4>were changing. And that was what the dream was. It

0:15:21.600 --> 0:15:23.200
<v Speaker 4>was that my kids felt like they grew up and

0:15:23.240 --> 0:15:25.760
<v Speaker 4>they didn't know me because I was too busy trying

0:15:25.760 --> 0:15:29.120
<v Speaker 4>to appease and trying to be accepted that I wasn't myself.

0:15:29.480 --> 0:15:33.000
<v Speaker 4>So as I became more of me, my kids they

0:15:33.040 --> 0:15:35.960
<v Speaker 4>became like happier kids. And then I was like, damn,

0:15:36.000 --> 0:15:37.880
<v Speaker 4>this is kind of lonely being this like evolved bitch

0:15:37.880 --> 0:15:40.240
<v Speaker 4>who don't give a fuck no more. Let me create

0:15:40.320 --> 0:15:43.480
<v Speaker 4>like a tribe of women. And I had a friend

0:15:43.480 --> 0:15:46.560
<v Speaker 4>who had a dance studio in San Francisco. She offered

0:15:46.600 --> 0:15:49.240
<v Speaker 4>me the opportunity to teach. The class took off. Two

0:15:49.240 --> 0:15:52.880
<v Speaker 4>weeks later, two chains called. Three weeks later, Erica Baidu called,

0:15:53.160 --> 0:15:55.560
<v Speaker 4>and then I'm on tour with Sheila Marie as Hood's

0:15:55.680 --> 0:15:59.560
<v Speaker 4>now wife. And somehow I went out for yoga but

0:15:59.640 --> 0:16:03.600
<v Speaker 4>ended up crossing over into like the entertainment industry. Then

0:16:03.680 --> 0:16:07.400
<v Speaker 4>three years later, we're a million dollar company and I'm

0:16:07.440 --> 0:16:09.720
<v Speaker 4>in my high rise looking like a villain in downtown

0:16:09.800 --> 0:16:14.240
<v Speaker 4>l Right, I'll be looking out like I wonder what

0:16:14.280 --> 0:16:17.120
<v Speaker 4>the peasants are doing. I'm getting I'm.

0:16:17.040 --> 0:16:19.080
<v Speaker 3>Kidding going down there.

0:16:19.480 --> 0:16:21.480
<v Speaker 2>Wait, you have a question, how long were you gone?

0:16:21.480 --> 0:16:23.200
<v Speaker 2>How long was that Eat Prey love trip?

0:16:23.880 --> 0:16:26.280
<v Speaker 4>Almost four months? And then when I came back, I

0:16:26.360 --> 0:16:29.520
<v Speaker 4>literally would like find every excuse to go. So since

0:16:29.520 --> 0:16:32.360
<v Speaker 4>then I have traveled like the whole world. Like, we

0:16:32.400 --> 0:16:34.200
<v Speaker 4>won't have time today, so you gotta to invite me back

0:16:34.240 --> 0:16:35.720
<v Speaker 4>so I can say about the one time Dick got

0:16:35.720 --> 0:16:36.920
<v Speaker 4>me put in jail in Singapore.

0:16:37.040 --> 0:16:40.840
<v Speaker 3>Oh, I've seen my hotel.

0:16:41.760 --> 0:16:44.200
<v Speaker 2>That you found in Singapore that put you in jail.

0:16:44.560 --> 0:16:47.880
<v Speaker 4>That ain't the I was wild, girl. I wasn't cursing.

0:16:47.920 --> 0:16:49.760
<v Speaker 2>I wasn't really Oh yeah, you had to you had

0:16:49.800 --> 0:16:54.360
<v Speaker 2>to relate this. Yeah, you had like seven years.

0:16:53.600 --> 0:16:56.200
<v Speaker 3>Jail and Singapore. I'm thinking of what's that broke down Palace?

0:16:56.760 --> 0:16:59.360
<v Speaker 4>That is the movie? So that is the movie that

0:16:59.680 --> 0:17:02.720
<v Speaker 4>made me lose my mind in jail. And they're like,

0:17:02.760 --> 0:17:05.160
<v Speaker 4>I'm a good girl. I'm a good girl. I'm good

0:17:05.240 --> 0:17:07.399
<v Speaker 4>forgive me Jesus. Yeah, okay. Bullet points told the man

0:17:07.480 --> 0:17:10.199
<v Speaker 4>not to can't take niggas nowhere nowhere, and I was like,

0:17:10.240 --> 0:17:11.679
<v Speaker 4>oh you got good Dick, Like, why don't you just

0:17:11.680 --> 0:17:12.240
<v Speaker 4>come to Singapore?

0:17:16.840 --> 0:17:17.960
<v Speaker 3>He bring weed lord.

0:17:19.440 --> 0:17:22.600
<v Speaker 4>And they ran through the bag and I called my friend,

0:17:22.680 --> 0:17:24.720
<v Speaker 4>was like, girl, I wasn't attached to my girl. He

0:17:24.760 --> 0:17:26.720
<v Speaker 4>about to go to motherfucking jail. I ain't saying no,

0:17:26.800 --> 0:17:30.719
<v Speaker 4>Bill like like you with him and I was like

0:17:30.800 --> 0:17:34.160
<v Speaker 4>not really, and then they took you like oh yeah you.

0:17:34.760 --> 0:17:37.399
<v Speaker 4>And so I went to jail for five days and

0:17:37.440 --> 0:17:39.440
<v Speaker 4>I was in there like losing my ship so much

0:17:39.480 --> 0:17:43.040
<v Speaker 4>that they were like maybe psychiatry evaluation, and they sent

0:17:43.119 --> 0:17:44.920
<v Speaker 4>me to the psych unit and I was like that's fine.

0:17:45.160 --> 0:17:47.320
<v Speaker 4>I got there and was like, actually, I like jail better.

0:17:48.520 --> 0:17:50.439
<v Speaker 4>Can I go back to jail all of that ordeal?

0:17:50.520 --> 0:17:52.080
<v Speaker 4>And they were just like, give us five thousand dollars

0:17:52.119 --> 0:17:52.760
<v Speaker 4>and don't come back.

0:17:52.760 --> 0:17:54.960
<v Speaker 2>And I was like, so you can never go to

0:17:54.960 --> 0:17:55.960
<v Speaker 2>Singapore ever again.

0:17:56.560 --> 0:18:01.120
<v Speaker 4>I got six years left. Oh is he still him?

0:18:01.119 --> 0:18:01.960
<v Speaker 2>I don't know where he at.

0:18:02.640 --> 0:18:05.520
<v Speaker 4>Wait, you haven't changed his lines under the jail. You

0:18:05.520 --> 0:18:07.960
<v Speaker 4>didn't google or anything, gonna cause family, his mom. This

0:18:08.040 --> 0:18:10.040
<v Speaker 4>was a safe space. I hear a little judgment, A

0:18:10.080 --> 0:18:11.560
<v Speaker 4>little judgment I don't really get.

0:18:11.960 --> 0:18:12.720
<v Speaker 3>I think it's fine.

0:18:12.760 --> 0:18:14.840
<v Speaker 4>I got kids. It's a cancer in me, Like you

0:18:14.880 --> 0:18:16.840
<v Speaker 4>didn't check this? He still like that, don't give He

0:18:16.920 --> 0:18:22.040
<v Speaker 4>was seutarious. He's all right, oh yeah, yeah, I'm furious.

0:18:22.480 --> 0:18:24.440
<v Speaker 4>It's well within my nature to be like, oh I

0:18:24.440 --> 0:18:27.520
<v Speaker 4>don't like that detached to detach yuh, that's sad. Everybody's

0:18:27.520 --> 0:18:28.120
<v Speaker 4>doing what they're doing.

0:18:28.280 --> 0:18:32.960
<v Speaker 2>Let this be a testament to everyone. Don't ship no niggas,

0:18:33.000 --> 0:18:37.920
<v Speaker 2>So don't ship no no imports to any form really anywhere.

0:18:37.920 --> 0:18:39.040
<v Speaker 3>Don't ship them in period.

0:18:39.160 --> 0:18:41.879
<v Speaker 1>Okay, if they can't get them fucking cells there. If

0:18:41.920 --> 0:18:43.240
<v Speaker 1>the shoe was on the other foot, and this was

0:18:43.320 --> 0:18:44.600
<v Speaker 1>Jamila's cancer ass.

0:18:44.440 --> 0:18:47.600
<v Speaker 4>She'd been like, is he okay? Let me go check

0:18:47.600 --> 0:18:47.840
<v Speaker 4>on him.

0:18:47.840 --> 0:18:52.920
<v Speaker 5>Actually gotta fly back his court case or maybe probably right,

0:18:52.960 --> 0:18:56.000
<v Speaker 5>But first of all, after five days in Singapore and jail,

0:18:56.280 --> 0:18:58.400
<v Speaker 5>that would be my first step into not giving a fuck.

0:18:58.480 --> 0:19:01.240
<v Speaker 3>Okay, I'm like, don't care, don't ever call me for real.

0:19:01.800 --> 0:19:04.000
<v Speaker 4>Cancer's guide to not giving a funk go to jail

0:19:04.119 --> 0:19:06.480
<v Speaker 4>was singing part for five days. And when I saw

0:19:06.520 --> 0:19:07.640
<v Speaker 4>him in past and he was like.

0:19:10.160 --> 0:19:11.840
<v Speaker 3>Nobody told you to bring marijuana.

0:19:11.880 --> 0:19:14.600
<v Speaker 4>Everything specifically told you don't bring shit here, like and

0:19:14.640 --> 0:19:16.680
<v Speaker 4>if you can't leave your house with ill weed, you

0:19:16.800 --> 0:19:20.679
<v Speaker 4>got a problem. Not everybody gets come shit happened.

0:19:21.640 --> 0:19:22.520
<v Speaker 3>That's so.

0:19:24.400 --> 0:19:26.680
<v Speaker 4>With circle back, what was talking about.

0:19:27.359 --> 0:19:29.000
<v Speaker 3>I'm just so inspired by this story.

0:19:29.040 --> 0:19:31.359
<v Speaker 2>I want to know. I'm you know, we're personally beginning

0:19:31.359 --> 0:19:35.520
<v Speaker 2>everybody's business. Was that the okay, minus the arguing. Was

0:19:35.520 --> 0:19:37.119
<v Speaker 2>that the first time he ever put his hands on you,

0:19:37.160 --> 0:19:38.800
<v Speaker 2>and that was like, that's what that was, Like, you're

0:19:39.440 --> 0:19:39.760
<v Speaker 2>the cam.

0:19:39.920 --> 0:19:41.800
<v Speaker 3>What is the straw that broke the camel's back.

0:19:42.560 --> 0:19:45.399
<v Speaker 4>M It was the first time he was like looking

0:19:45.440 --> 0:19:47.480
<v Speaker 4>at me, and I was like, I'm from the hood,

0:19:47.480 --> 0:19:49.119
<v Speaker 4>Like I've been in tons of his fights, and so

0:19:49.240 --> 0:19:51.080
<v Speaker 4>it's not like I was like, oh my god, he's

0:19:51.119 --> 0:19:53.560
<v Speaker 4>hitting me. I was just like, for real, nigga, for real,

0:19:53.720 --> 0:19:55.399
<v Speaker 4>you know, like I started cursing again, and he's just

0:19:55.440 --> 0:19:57.840
<v Speaker 4>like body shots. So we had got like he was

0:19:57.880 --> 0:20:00.439
<v Speaker 4>like taking pride. It was like a lot of it.

0:20:00.480 --> 0:20:03.200
<v Speaker 4>There had been an argument that we'd gotten into before,

0:20:03.240 --> 0:20:05.639
<v Speaker 4>and he slammed me in a car door and he

0:20:05.720 --> 0:20:08.680
<v Speaker 4>was very like apologetic, and so I was like, eh,

0:20:08.840 --> 0:20:10.600
<v Speaker 4>you know, and then young love, I'll take him back.

0:20:10.600 --> 0:20:12.200
<v Speaker 4>But that was the first time that I had really

0:20:12.280 --> 0:20:16.000
<v Speaker 4>just like you know, like Bruce clavical face swollen.

0:20:15.920 --> 0:20:17.680
<v Speaker 2>Like oh, I'm in a lifetime movie type shit.

0:20:18.080 --> 0:20:21.240
<v Speaker 4>Yeah. Yeah, Like it was one of those, and so yeah,

0:20:21.520 --> 0:20:24.280
<v Speaker 4>I'm happy that I walked away, and I think, you know,

0:20:24.400 --> 0:20:26.160
<v Speaker 4>let that be a testament. A lot of times people

0:20:26.200 --> 0:20:27.760
<v Speaker 4>think like that was the worst day of my life

0:20:27.960 --> 0:20:29.840
<v Speaker 4>and the worst day of your life is a springboard

0:20:30.119 --> 0:20:32.680
<v Speaker 4>for the best life that you could ever live. Walk

0:20:32.760 --> 0:20:34.960
<v Speaker 4>the fuck away. I'm suggested.

0:20:35.160 --> 0:20:39.960
<v Speaker 1>I was listening to you on highway and another jumla. Yeah,

0:20:40.000 --> 0:20:42.760
<v Speaker 1>I was listening and you said something that really stuck

0:20:42.760 --> 0:20:45.280
<v Speaker 1>with me, and it was the prerequisite for joy is

0:20:45.320 --> 0:20:48.600
<v Speaker 1>basically experiencing the other end of that. And I was like, damn,

0:20:48.720 --> 0:20:50.720
<v Speaker 1>like it's show it's so true, and I feel like,

0:20:50.760 --> 0:20:53.679
<v Speaker 1>I mean, obviously that's your testament to that. How do

0:20:53.760 --> 0:20:56.080
<v Speaker 1>you now navigate in that space because obviously your I

0:20:56.119 --> 0:20:58.640
<v Speaker 1>don't know if your kids are you know, if he's

0:20:58.640 --> 0:21:00.640
<v Speaker 1>so involved with your kids, and like, how do you

0:21:01.040 --> 0:21:06.120
<v Speaker 1>navigate co parenting essentially with your abuser in some capacity,

0:21:06.400 --> 0:21:09.680
<v Speaker 1>Like yeah, like how do you navigate that space? And like,

0:21:09.880 --> 0:21:11.520
<v Speaker 1>I'm sure you guys have come a long way since

0:21:11.560 --> 0:21:12.119
<v Speaker 1>that moment.

0:21:12.880 --> 0:21:16.200
<v Speaker 3>Maybe I don't know. I don't know. I trust me, amen,

0:21:16.240 --> 0:21:17.000
<v Speaker 3>I know how you feel.

0:21:18.680 --> 0:21:22.280
<v Speaker 4>No, it's a good question. So for the first ten

0:21:22.359 --> 0:21:25.359
<v Speaker 4>months when I left, he was very much like fuck

0:21:25.440 --> 0:21:27.399
<v Speaker 4>you and them kids, like if I can't have you,

0:21:27.480 --> 0:21:30.439
<v Speaker 4>I will start over. And then one day he popped

0:21:30.480 --> 0:21:33.960
<v Speaker 4>up at my new home and like had like broken

0:21:34.080 --> 0:21:36.480
<v Speaker 4>girl had put his tooth firsh for my tooth first, wooh,

0:21:36.720 --> 0:21:40.080
<v Speaker 4>what tattoo of my face on his hands? I had

0:21:40.160 --> 0:21:43.840
<v Speaker 4>lost his fucking mind. And what was I was coming

0:21:43.880 --> 0:21:47.600
<v Speaker 4>back from a speaking engagement with the homeboy and he

0:21:47.840 --> 0:21:49.720
<v Speaker 4>just assumed I was sleeping with the homeboy and was like,

0:21:49.800 --> 0:21:52.639
<v Speaker 4>I knew it so biblical people. So he was waiting

0:21:52.720 --> 0:21:56.920
<v Speaker 4>at the wait walked in with the dew. When you

0:21:57.040 --> 0:21:59.160
<v Speaker 4>sleeping with the dow? Walked in with the dow. And

0:21:59.280 --> 0:22:01.680
<v Speaker 4>what's funny is like church folk call you a harlet.

0:22:01.680 --> 0:22:07.080
<v Speaker 4>He was like you harlot, and he was like, you'd

0:22:07.080 --> 0:22:09.680
<v Speaker 4>be letting these men fuck on you. And I was like, correction,

0:22:10.119 --> 0:22:13.359
<v Speaker 4>I fucked them back, fuck each other. We be fucking

0:22:13.400 --> 0:22:15.560
<v Speaker 4>each other, not this one. And he like went to

0:22:15.640 --> 0:22:17.560
<v Speaker 4>lunch at me and the guy friend like beat the

0:22:17.600 --> 0:22:18.159
<v Speaker 4>shit out of it.

0:22:18.240 --> 0:22:19.520
<v Speaker 3>He imagine that man.

0:22:19.640 --> 0:22:21.760
<v Speaker 4>And I was watching very calmly, and eventually I got

0:22:21.800 --> 0:22:23.960
<v Speaker 4>over it and like called my brother and was like, yo,

0:22:24.080 --> 0:22:26.560
<v Speaker 4>can you just can come with these niggas off my floor?

0:22:26.920 --> 0:22:28.800
<v Speaker 4>You know this is my lanm broke. It's a little

0:22:28.840 --> 0:22:32.520
<v Speaker 4>bit much. And so the divorce was gnarly. It was nasty,

0:22:32.640 --> 0:22:36.240
<v Speaker 4>It was very, very hard. And then when my company

0:22:36.240 --> 0:22:39.600
<v Speaker 4>took off, that is when he was like, oh, I

0:22:39.640 --> 0:22:41.720
<v Speaker 4>want to make your life live in hell. We went

0:22:41.760 --> 0:22:44.080
<v Speaker 4>through child support. There was a point where I was

0:22:44.080 --> 0:22:48.080
<v Speaker 4>paying six thousand dollars a month in child support. You ladies,

0:22:48.160 --> 0:22:50.800
<v Speaker 4>if you have an LLC, make sure you separate your

0:22:50.800 --> 0:22:53.320
<v Speaker 4>shit because they can pierce your veil. And all of

0:22:53.320 --> 0:22:56.200
<v Speaker 4>the income from trap Yoga Bay got assigned to me

0:22:56.320 --> 0:22:57.480
<v Speaker 4>and they was like, pay that man.

0:22:57.960 --> 0:23:00.120
<v Speaker 2>So because there was it wasn't separate enterity.

0:23:00.320 --> 0:23:03.399
<v Speaker 4>Yeah, it wasn't like it wasn't it wasn't LLC, but

0:23:03.480 --> 0:23:05.200
<v Speaker 4>I was co mingling funds. I didn't know what the

0:23:05.200 --> 0:23:07.240
<v Speaker 4>fuck I was doing, like my first year, and I

0:23:07.280 --> 0:23:09.359
<v Speaker 4>think people should be more transparent about this. My first year,

0:23:09.400 --> 0:23:11.000
<v Speaker 4>I made over three hundred thousand dollars. I know what

0:23:11.000 --> 0:23:11.480
<v Speaker 4>the fuck was.

0:23:11.560 --> 0:23:14.960
<v Speaker 3>I was like money, right, right, right, And.

0:23:15.200 --> 0:23:18.040
<v Speaker 4>Then you'd be like, actually, it's not that rich. But

0:23:18.080 --> 0:23:20.199
<v Speaker 4>the divorce took almost two and a half years. I

0:23:20.240 --> 0:23:22.320
<v Speaker 4>had to get a lawyer and the n we ended

0:23:22.359 --> 0:23:25.040
<v Speaker 4>up with fifty to fifty custody and then there was

0:23:25.080 --> 0:23:29.240
<v Speaker 4>a lot of contention. But I quickly just like reframed

0:23:29.320 --> 0:23:31.919
<v Speaker 4>my mindset around it and like he knows it. He

0:23:32.000 --> 0:23:34.480
<v Speaker 4>listens to the podcast, like he'll hear this one. I

0:23:34.520 --> 0:23:37.840
<v Speaker 4>affectionately now call him my baby mama. I'm like my

0:23:37.840 --> 0:23:41.160
<v Speaker 4>baby mama, bad bitch. You know, he's beautiful. He like

0:23:41.359 --> 0:23:43.760
<v Speaker 4>our dynamic is very much like he treats me like

0:23:43.840 --> 0:23:46.960
<v Speaker 4>the baby daddy. And so this school year, or when

0:23:47.000 --> 0:23:49.040
<v Speaker 4>I up and moved to la during the pandemic, it

0:23:49.080 --> 0:23:51.879
<v Speaker 4>was fine because the kids had virtual school. But now

0:23:51.920 --> 0:23:54.879
<v Speaker 4>they're back in school and my daughter has a lot

0:23:54.920 --> 0:23:56.159
<v Speaker 4>of say in her life. So she was like, I

0:23:56.160 --> 0:23:57.520
<v Speaker 4>want to go back to my old school. I want

0:23:57.520 --> 0:23:59.160
<v Speaker 4>to see my old friends. And I was like, oh,

0:23:59.560 --> 0:24:02.800
<v Speaker 4>so you're gonna go back to Oakland. Hmmm, all right,

0:24:02.840 --> 0:24:08.000
<v Speaker 4>well I'm gonna miss you. Call me and so jokingly

0:24:08.000 --> 0:24:09.359
<v Speaker 4>because I see my kids all the time and I

0:24:09.400 --> 0:24:10.760
<v Speaker 4>call them, but I'm like, this is the year of

0:24:10.760 --> 0:24:13.679
<v Speaker 4>the dead beat mom, Like this is the year. This

0:24:13.720 --> 0:24:16.240
<v Speaker 4>is the year beat mom, you know, like it is

0:24:16.280 --> 0:24:18.520
<v Speaker 4>what it is. This is I've had kids since I

0:24:18.600 --> 0:24:21.760
<v Speaker 4>was twenty. I've never been an adult woman without children.

0:24:22.040 --> 0:24:24.520
<v Speaker 4>This is the longest stint and it's been five weeks.

0:24:25.680 --> 0:24:28.360
<v Speaker 4>This is the longest stint where I've been like in

0:24:28.359 --> 0:24:33.760
<v Speaker 4>love with myself, financially stable, happy, joyful and finest, fuck

0:24:34.040 --> 0:24:37.600
<v Speaker 4>childless what I'm out? You know?

0:24:37.840 --> 0:24:38.760
<v Speaker 3>So so you're winning.

0:24:39.000 --> 0:24:42.560
<v Speaker 4>So yeah. So now because he's like taking over the

0:24:42.640 --> 0:24:45.600
<v Speaker 4>parenting thing, Like he'll be like the son is eating groceries.

0:24:45.600 --> 0:24:47.520
<v Speaker 4>I'll be like, damn, okay, here's like five hundred dollars,

0:24:47.600 --> 0:24:49.199
<v Speaker 4>Like what the fuck? Like, can I order y'all some

0:24:49.200 --> 0:24:49.760
<v Speaker 4>Hello Fresh?

0:24:49.800 --> 0:24:51.080
<v Speaker 3>Like what you mean you need pee too?

0:24:51.080 --> 0:24:52.800
<v Speaker 2>I mean to deliver pictures to Hype, right, I'd be like.

0:24:52.800 --> 0:24:54.399
<v Speaker 4>She got my uber east the count, Like tell that

0:24:54.440 --> 0:24:57.840
<v Speaker 4>girl order some pizza, don't order. Don't be doing too much.

0:24:57.880 --> 0:24:59.760
<v Speaker 4>Don't be doing too much, like call your daddy. So

0:25:00.040 --> 0:25:03.359
<v Speaker 4>this is a very interesting and unique time where I

0:25:03.440 --> 0:25:08.040
<v Speaker 4>am now thirty three, fully navigating womanhood without children. So

0:25:08.080 --> 0:25:10.320
<v Speaker 4>I don't know if that resonates with anybody, but it's

0:25:10.320 --> 0:25:11.160
<v Speaker 4>it's a different day.

0:25:12.480 --> 0:25:13.080
<v Speaker 3>That's amazing.

0:25:13.160 --> 0:25:15.080
<v Speaker 1>I mean, I think I think that that's a story

0:25:15.080 --> 0:25:17.160
<v Speaker 1>that you don't hear often, right, Like you hear that,

0:25:17.320 --> 0:25:20.600
<v Speaker 1>you know, you know, the kid is always supposed to

0:25:20.600 --> 0:25:21.840
<v Speaker 1>be with the mother, Like that's.

0:25:21.680 --> 0:25:22.800
<v Speaker 4>What mom's amazing to be.

0:25:23.080 --> 0:25:25.000
<v Speaker 1>But I have a question though, because because of the

0:25:25.080 --> 0:25:26.760
<v Speaker 1>history that you have with him. Do you ever con

0:25:26.960 --> 0:25:29.080
<v Speaker 1>because this is always my fear because I mean we're

0:25:29.119 --> 0:25:32.080
<v Speaker 1>both single parents, and for me, like I don't really

0:25:32.359 --> 0:25:34.680
<v Speaker 1>know what kind of parenting is happening on the other side,

0:25:35.200 --> 0:25:37.399
<v Speaker 1>Like I just don't. He doesn't care to share with me,

0:25:37.440 --> 0:25:39.440
<v Speaker 1>he doesn't care to co parent with me. Really, yeah,

0:25:39.480 --> 0:25:43.119
<v Speaker 1>and we're not it's not a team effort. So do

0:25:43.200 --> 0:25:46.119
<v Speaker 1>you ever get concerned about like, you know, how how

0:25:46.280 --> 0:25:49.359
<v Speaker 1>how being real? Yeah, if you're going to have to

0:25:49.400 --> 0:25:51.879
<v Speaker 1>do a lot of unprogramming.

0:25:51.119 --> 0:25:55.560
<v Speaker 4>Oh, absolutely definitely there's reprogramming. I mean things as simple

0:25:55.600 --> 0:25:59.360
<v Speaker 4>as you know, the way my son in him interact

0:25:59.480 --> 0:26:02.840
<v Speaker 4>versus like what I allow is different. So they come over,

0:26:02.960 --> 0:26:04.879
<v Speaker 4>you know, and it's just like day one is always

0:26:04.880 --> 0:26:07.200
<v Speaker 4>like transitions. Day two is like, all right, so we're here.

0:26:07.359 --> 0:26:09.240
<v Speaker 4>Let me tell y'all, y'all might have forgot the rules

0:26:09.280 --> 0:26:11.840
<v Speaker 4>the same datty house. You know, it's not his house.

0:26:12.160 --> 0:26:15.080
<v Speaker 4>So I think, you know, there is that. But if

0:26:15.080 --> 0:26:18.800
<v Speaker 4>we can start focusing on only controlling what we can, right,

0:26:19.359 --> 0:26:23.240
<v Speaker 4>and I think it illuminates the differences in parenting styles

0:26:23.240 --> 0:26:25.680
<v Speaker 4>when you guys are parenting separate. But if you think

0:26:25.720 --> 0:26:28.320
<v Speaker 4>about it, if you guys. Ever, you know, cohabitated with

0:26:28.359 --> 0:26:31.120
<v Speaker 4>the children, there was still that contention, there was still

0:26:31.119 --> 0:26:33.960
<v Speaker 4>that difference in how you parented. And you know, I

0:26:34.040 --> 0:26:36.920
<v Speaker 4>remember when you know, we were doing the crowdout method

0:26:36.960 --> 0:26:39.440
<v Speaker 4>to sleep train my daughter and I was very much

0:26:39.520 --> 0:26:42.840
<v Speaker 4>like not tripping when she was crying, and he was like,

0:26:42.960 --> 0:26:45.960
<v Speaker 4>damn you a monster, and no, she'll figure it out,

0:26:46.359 --> 0:26:48.640
<v Speaker 4>and we would have those moments of this is how

0:26:48.680 --> 0:26:50.320
<v Speaker 4>I want a parent, This is how I want a parent.

0:26:50.400 --> 0:26:52.760
<v Speaker 4>So when I can remember that, this is no different

0:26:52.840 --> 0:26:55.840
<v Speaker 4>than when we were in one household, and you know,

0:26:55.920 --> 0:26:59.679
<v Speaker 4>what's my ideal situation outside of us being married is,

0:26:59.760 --> 0:27:02.960
<v Speaker 4>you know, eventually I move forward and find a person

0:27:03.000 --> 0:27:04.760
<v Speaker 4>who loves me and loves the kids, and he does

0:27:04.800 --> 0:27:07.359
<v Speaker 4>the same. And now these children have four parents. And

0:27:08.280 --> 0:27:10.480
<v Speaker 4>typically I like his girlfriends more than I like him

0:27:11.040 --> 0:27:12.800
<v Speaker 4>like and that's one thing I'll give him. He was

0:27:12.800 --> 0:27:14.520
<v Speaker 4>not a good husband to me. He show know how

0:27:14.520 --> 0:27:17.280
<v Speaker 4>to pick some good women, and he's an amazing father,

0:27:17.400 --> 0:27:20.879
<v Speaker 4>and so I trust his process and I ask a

0:27:20.920 --> 0:27:24.639
<v Speaker 4>lot of questions, which I think it sometimes puts undue

0:27:24.760 --> 0:27:28.000
<v Speaker 4>pressure on my daughter to like report because you get

0:27:28.000 --> 0:27:29.840
<v Speaker 4>in and I'll be like, all right, snitch to me,

0:27:30.520 --> 0:27:33.439
<v Speaker 4>what's going on over there, you know, And so I

0:27:33.480 --> 0:27:36.320
<v Speaker 4>acknowledge that, but it's out of our you know, it's

0:27:36.359 --> 0:27:38.480
<v Speaker 4>out of my control. And as long as I'm never

0:27:38.560 --> 0:27:41.919
<v Speaker 4>hearing things that feel alarming like abuse because he has

0:27:41.920 --> 0:27:45.760
<v Speaker 4>a history of abusing women or you know, heavy patriarchal

0:27:45.840 --> 0:27:49.280
<v Speaker 4>things that I'm like, yeah, we're not gonna be putting

0:27:49.280 --> 0:27:51.520
<v Speaker 4>that on my daughter, then then I kind of just

0:27:51.520 --> 0:27:54.439
<v Speaker 4>gotta let him do his things. I picked him, and

0:27:54.480 --> 0:27:57.400
<v Speaker 4>sometimes I apologize to myself and other people, like, I'm sorry,

0:27:57.480 --> 0:28:01.600
<v Speaker 4>that's who I chose. He was mine. I did not

0:28:01.640 --> 0:28:04.320
<v Speaker 4>stick beside him, but I him.

0:28:04.440 --> 0:28:06.400
<v Speaker 3>Do you think you get married again? Do you think

0:28:06.400 --> 0:28:07.120
<v Speaker 3>you get married again?

0:28:07.480 --> 0:28:10.960
<v Speaker 4>Girl? Did you see my mission?

0:28:12.119 --> 0:28:12.800
<v Speaker 3>What do you speak of?

0:28:13.600 --> 0:28:15.240
<v Speaker 4>I felt like you jumped in my over. I felt

0:28:15.280 --> 0:28:17.280
<v Speaker 4>like you proposed to me. It's a little quick for

0:28:17.320 --> 0:28:20.959
<v Speaker 4>that ship. I believe in commitment and I believe in

0:28:21.280 --> 0:28:24.760
<v Speaker 4>deep connection and joy, and that is what I prioritize

0:28:24.880 --> 0:28:29.480
<v Speaker 4>over titles in time, and so I think at best

0:28:29.520 --> 0:28:31.040
<v Speaker 4>I could I could do a commitment ceremony.

0:28:32.080 --> 0:28:32.399
<v Speaker 3>Best.

0:28:32.560 --> 0:28:34.280
<v Speaker 4>At best I can do I can let everybody know,

0:28:34.359 --> 0:28:36.800
<v Speaker 4>like I'm fucking with this person. We rocking steady.

0:28:37.160 --> 0:28:41.880
<v Speaker 3>Are you in a relationship right now? Okay, it comes

0:28:42.000 --> 0:28:42.320
<v Speaker 3>maybe a.

0:28:42.320 --> 0:28:45.160
<v Speaker 2>Little bit, it's not even it's not complicated, Like do

0:28:45.200 --> 0:28:47.400
<v Speaker 2>you not believe like maybe not marriage. Do you believe

0:28:47.400 --> 0:28:49.520
<v Speaker 2>in saying, oh, this is my partner or not that's

0:28:49.560 --> 0:28:49.880
<v Speaker 2>even a.

0:28:50.080 --> 0:28:52.240
<v Speaker 4>Yeah, No, I believe I believe in saying like, this

0:28:52.280 --> 0:28:56.000
<v Speaker 4>is my partner. I think the variety is important, and

0:28:56.480 --> 0:29:00.000
<v Speaker 4>I have someone that I cherish and I love spending

0:29:00.080 --> 0:29:03.360
<v Speaker 4>in time with. But I'm also like, yeah.

0:29:03.160 --> 0:29:05.000
<v Speaker 2>There's a lot there's a lot of fish.

0:29:05.000 --> 0:29:06.960
<v Speaker 4>Inc there's a lot of fish in the sea, and

0:29:07.160 --> 0:29:08.720
<v Speaker 4>you know, I go on a date over there, like

0:29:08.760 --> 0:29:10.880
<v Speaker 4>it ain't so great, and then I'm like, yeah, I

0:29:10.880 --> 0:29:12.840
<v Speaker 4>didn't have a good time, like you hungry? Hell yeah,

0:29:12.840 --> 0:29:14.960
<v Speaker 4>I'm hungry, Like you know what I need? My bad

0:29:15.000 --> 0:29:16.520
<v Speaker 4>I don't even know. Let me just go ahead and

0:29:16.520 --> 0:29:18.400
<v Speaker 4>send all my friends call me the hr hoe because

0:29:18.440 --> 0:29:22.440
<v Speaker 4>I send hr messages when I break it off with people, which, oh,

0:29:22.960 --> 0:29:24.720
<v Speaker 4>thank you so much for your time and your effort.

0:29:24.760 --> 0:29:27.560
<v Speaker 4>After careful consideration, I do not think that it sads

0:29:27.640 --> 0:29:29.800
<v Speaker 4>for us to move forward with this. However, I wish

0:29:29.840 --> 0:29:30.680
<v Speaker 4>you're messing your future.

0:29:31.120 --> 0:29:32.160
<v Speaker 3>It may afford me that time.

0:29:32.880 --> 0:29:36.000
<v Speaker 1>H you are hr I feel I've been doing that

0:29:36.040 --> 0:29:38.239
<v Speaker 1>ship too. I recently did that with somebody and he

0:29:38.360 --> 0:29:40.240
<v Speaker 1>just could not believe it. He could not believe that

0:29:40.280 --> 0:29:42.720
<v Speaker 1>this was happening. And then I find that when you

0:29:42.760 --> 0:29:44.479
<v Speaker 1>do that, though they respect it, they act that they

0:29:44.520 --> 0:29:46.600
<v Speaker 1>respect it, and then they always they think you're they

0:29:46.640 --> 0:29:47.520
<v Speaker 1>think you're joking.

0:29:47.720 --> 0:29:50.080
<v Speaker 2>No, they want to they want to prove to you

0:29:50.200 --> 0:29:51.440
<v Speaker 2>that you you're wrong.

0:29:51.880 --> 0:29:54.040
<v Speaker 3>Well, they just they don't want to believe you have boundaries.

0:29:54.480 --> 0:29:55.440
<v Speaker 4>And that's what it is.

0:29:55.480 --> 0:29:57.200
<v Speaker 1>And I know that, like you know, I know that

0:29:57.200 --> 0:29:59.960
<v Speaker 1>you talk a lot about boundaries and like how importan

0:30:00.080 --> 0:30:02.440
<v Speaker 1>in a jam, yeah, and how important they are, and

0:30:02.680 --> 0:30:05.120
<v Speaker 1>like how do you what is your biggest I guess

0:30:05.520 --> 0:30:09.960
<v Speaker 1>tip for starting to implement boundaries in your life? Because

0:30:09.960 --> 0:30:11.480
<v Speaker 1>I know there's a lot of people listening to that,

0:30:11.520 --> 0:30:13.000
<v Speaker 1>like they don't even know where to start for.

0:30:13.000 --> 0:30:15.720
<v Speaker 4>Sure, for sure, because it's not easy. I would say,

0:30:15.920 --> 0:30:17.360
<v Speaker 4>people don't know where to start where They're like, I

0:30:17.360 --> 0:30:19.840
<v Speaker 4>don't even know where, like where that boundary line is?

0:30:19.880 --> 0:30:21.840
<v Speaker 4>And I said, or when I need to implement them?

0:30:22.240 --> 0:30:25.200
<v Speaker 4>My biggest step one advice is if you feel like

0:30:25.240 --> 0:30:27.400
<v Speaker 4>I have to choose between loving you and loving me.

0:30:28.240 --> 0:30:30.520
<v Speaker 4>Then the boundary is I need to love myself, and

0:30:30.760 --> 0:30:33.960
<v Speaker 4>that's in compromising. A lot of times you're like, oh,

0:30:34.080 --> 0:30:36.200
<v Speaker 4>you know, I found out he's talking to somebody else,

0:30:36.200 --> 0:30:37.960
<v Speaker 4>but we're in a close relationship.

0:30:38.800 --> 0:30:39.600
<v Speaker 3>Oh you know.

0:30:39.640 --> 0:30:42.000
<v Speaker 4>If I stay, I'm low key gonna hate myself and

0:30:42.040 --> 0:30:45.240
<v Speaker 4>it's gonna change the dynamic. Then it's time for a boundary,

0:30:45.240 --> 0:30:48.400
<v Speaker 4>because now if I proceed with this, I'm gonna feel

0:30:48.400 --> 0:30:51.000
<v Speaker 4>some kind of way about me and to me. That's

0:30:51.840 --> 0:30:54.120
<v Speaker 4>at least the starting point of like, now, let's be

0:30:54.160 --> 0:30:57.160
<v Speaker 4>aware that we don't like that. So I've got an

0:30:57.280 --> 0:30:59.160
<v Speaker 4>hr message for you. Oh my god, I can't wait

0:30:59.160 --> 0:31:02.600
<v Speaker 4>tear this please, So I said, was this reason? Yes, yes,

0:31:02.720 --> 0:31:04.479
<v Speaker 4>and it actually is the hotel that I was going

0:31:04.520 --> 0:31:10.120
<v Speaker 4>to tell you about. So I said, stink, you already

0:31:10.120 --> 0:31:13.600
<v Speaker 4>had a nickname for this nigga. No, No, that that's general.

0:31:13.760 --> 0:31:14.680
<v Speaker 3>It's okay.

0:31:16.520 --> 0:31:19.080
<v Speaker 4>I have to make this very clear. I cannot participate

0:31:19.120 --> 0:31:20.960
<v Speaker 4>in this. I do not want to be a part

0:31:20.960 --> 0:31:23.080
<v Speaker 4>of your life. I would never suggest that you meet

0:31:23.080 --> 0:31:24.600
<v Speaker 4>a meeting, miss a meeting. He was like, he was

0:31:24.600 --> 0:31:25.760
<v Speaker 4>gonna miss a meeting to come talk to me. I

0:31:25.760 --> 0:31:28.600
<v Speaker 4>don't want to talk miss a meeting for someone who

0:31:28.680 --> 0:31:31.160
<v Speaker 4>is not interested in moving forward. I appreciate you for

0:31:31.240 --> 0:31:34.560
<v Speaker 4>your transparency and for giving me a genuine try. I

0:31:34.560 --> 0:31:37.520
<v Speaker 4>will not be responding to any calls or text beyond

0:31:37.520 --> 0:31:39.840
<v Speaker 4>this message. Please take care of yourself.

0:31:40.520 --> 0:31:46.680
<v Speaker 3>I for I didn't stop. So, wait, what are the

0:31:46.800 --> 0:31:47.600
<v Speaker 3>links he's sending?

0:31:47.600 --> 0:31:48.240
<v Speaker 4>What is that link?

0:31:48.560 --> 0:31:49.160
<v Speaker 3>Review of what?

0:31:49.360 --> 0:31:49.479
<v Speaker 2>So?

0:31:49.520 --> 0:31:53.000
<v Speaker 4>He told me that I was giving him cardiomyopathy, being

0:31:53.040 --> 0:32:00.200
<v Speaker 4>responded heart palpitations, bullshit no. So then he me a

0:32:00.280 --> 0:32:02.680
<v Speaker 4>video of how I like. If you watch my Instagram,

0:32:02.760 --> 0:32:04.280
<v Speaker 4>you notice I make my bed every day and I

0:32:04.320 --> 0:32:05.920
<v Speaker 4>show people how I felt close. And then he showed

0:32:05.920 --> 0:32:08.920
<v Speaker 4>me how he folds close like me. Now, oh but here,

0:32:08.960 --> 0:32:10.720
<v Speaker 4>here's boundaries. You see all of these?

0:32:11.080 --> 0:32:13.720
<v Speaker 3>Wait? Was he sending you tomor Braxton music music?

0:32:13.840 --> 0:32:14.040
<v Speaker 4>Yes?

0:32:14.080 --> 0:32:14.360
<v Speaker 3>Stop?

0:32:14.800 --> 0:32:18.120
<v Speaker 4>What does his voice know? What is his signa? Crazy?

0:32:18.520 --> 0:32:19.160
<v Speaker 3>Crazy?

0:32:19.680 --> 0:32:23.000
<v Speaker 4>Wow? We should tell this story.

0:32:21.880 --> 0:32:23.920
<v Speaker 3>Yeah, I'm trying to.

0:32:23.840 --> 0:32:28.400
<v Speaker 2>Remember he was aries, he was I don't know anything

0:32:28.400 --> 0:32:30.160
<v Speaker 2>about them, their fiery.

0:32:29.960 --> 0:32:31.880
<v Speaker 4>And it ended with like, look, can I just bring

0:32:31.880 --> 0:32:33.680
<v Speaker 4>you some money? And I'm just like, I'm not moves

0:32:33.720 --> 0:32:36.560
<v Speaker 4>my money money not. The last message was like, look

0:32:36.720 --> 0:32:38.800
<v Speaker 4>I have somebody who can bring you four thousand dollars

0:32:38.920 --> 0:32:40.560
<v Speaker 4>right now needs you to respond?

0:32:41.040 --> 0:32:44.200
<v Speaker 3>Why need he's a con artist?

0:32:44.360 --> 0:32:46.680
<v Speaker 4>He wasn't, so I'm like, oh, if this man find

0:32:46.720 --> 0:32:49.960
<v Speaker 4>he gonna kill me. He like, I don't do thugs.

0:32:50.040 --> 0:32:51.080
<v Speaker 4>I don't, I don't.

0:32:51.160 --> 0:32:53.320
<v Speaker 2>Is that a thug sending your tamar b was a thug?

0:32:54.240 --> 0:32:57.040
<v Speaker 4>Was a thug? I don't do thugs? So oh shit,

0:32:57.120 --> 0:33:00.160
<v Speaker 4>what happened? What happened was I was out here an

0:33:00.200 --> 0:33:02.760
<v Speaker 4>event and I had met a guy right, and I

0:33:02.800 --> 0:33:05.720
<v Speaker 4>was like, ooh, I like him, right, but he lived

0:33:05.720 --> 0:33:07.920
<v Speaker 4>in New York. He had to fly out, and so

0:33:08.000 --> 0:33:09.479
<v Speaker 4>we were talking on the phone and he was just

0:33:09.520 --> 0:33:11.800
<v Speaker 4>like I can't take it, Like can you come see

0:33:11.840 --> 0:33:13.880
<v Speaker 4>me in New York? And I was like, yeah, I

0:33:13.920 --> 0:33:15.320
<v Speaker 4>guess I can come see you in New York. Be like,

0:33:15.360 --> 0:33:16.880
<v Speaker 4>you know, I can't stay with you. Get me a

0:33:16.880 --> 0:33:19.280
<v Speaker 4>hotel room, all that shit, and he's like, okay, cool,

0:33:19.680 --> 0:33:21.520
<v Speaker 4>I got you. So he gets me my flight, he

0:33:21.560 --> 0:33:24.280
<v Speaker 4>gives me my hotel room. I'm on my way. I

0:33:24.320 --> 0:33:27.080
<v Speaker 4>text him and I'm like, are you excited to see me?

0:33:27.120 --> 0:33:29.560
<v Speaker 4>And he's like yeah, but I have to be honest

0:33:29.560 --> 0:33:31.600
<v Speaker 4>with you. I'm a little tired, so I won't be

0:33:31.600 --> 0:33:33.520
<v Speaker 4>able to pick you up from the airport, and I'm

0:33:33.560 --> 0:33:36.840
<v Speaker 4>like the problem. So then what he forgot to do

0:33:37.400 --> 0:33:39.320
<v Speaker 4>was blocking me from his Instagram stories.

0:33:42.360 --> 0:33:44.480
<v Speaker 1>I got my box from like a Kitten. You might

0:33:44.480 --> 0:33:47.720
<v Speaker 1>have seen me post it on Instagram. I'm fucking obsessed.

0:33:48.200 --> 0:33:52.520
<v Speaker 1>Not only did I get beautiful jewelry like handcuffs, I

0:33:52.560 --> 0:33:57.120
<v Speaker 1>got sattin restraints, I got a bomb ass vibrator, I

0:33:57.160 --> 0:33:59.040
<v Speaker 1>got a beautiful silk robe.

0:33:59.400 --> 0:34:01.720
<v Speaker 2>It really is. I mean, sometimes going into a sex

0:34:01.760 --> 0:34:05.000
<v Speaker 2>shop can be super overwhelming. There's so much shit, but like,

0:34:05.200 --> 0:34:07.800
<v Speaker 2>just reminding to keep your sexy in a subscription box

0:34:07.840 --> 0:34:11.040
<v Speaker 2>every month is just like the perfect gift, surprise gift

0:34:11.080 --> 0:34:13.799
<v Speaker 2>to keep it sexy literally every month without having to

0:34:14.160 --> 0:34:15.840
<v Speaker 2>get in a car go to a shop. It just

0:34:15.840 --> 0:34:18.640
<v Speaker 2>comes right to your fucking front door and it's sexy

0:34:18.680 --> 0:34:19.440
<v Speaker 2>time exactly.

0:34:19.480 --> 0:34:21.480
<v Speaker 1>And this month they're helping you choose your own adventure

0:34:21.520 --> 0:34:25.480
<v Speaker 1>with their byob Box aka build your own box, so

0:34:25.560 --> 0:34:27.920
<v Speaker 1>you can pick out whatever you want and put it

0:34:27.920 --> 0:34:29.920
<v Speaker 1>in that box. And what's amazing is that this box

0:34:30.000 --> 0:34:33.120
<v Speaker 1>is only sixty nine dollars. Some of the vibrators alone

0:34:33.239 --> 0:34:35.440
<v Speaker 1>retail for more than sixty nine. Oh the old neglige

0:34:35.440 --> 0:34:37.640
<v Speaker 1>a little pink, sexy, little teddy. As soon as I

0:34:37.640 --> 0:34:39.040
<v Speaker 1>came to my front door, I put that shit on.

0:34:39.080 --> 0:34:40.839
<v Speaker 1>I was by myself, and I was like, damn, I'm

0:34:40.880 --> 0:34:43.239
<v Speaker 1>a bad bit. Well right now, Like a Kitten is

0:34:43.280 --> 0:34:46.000
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0:34:46.040 --> 0:34:48.359
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0:34:48.440 --> 0:34:52.600
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0:34:52.719 --> 0:34:56.640
<v Speaker 1>promo code GMBC, and the link is in this episode's description.

0:34:57.560 --> 0:35:01.200
<v Speaker 2>Oh my god, wash day in my house is crazy.

0:35:01.360 --> 0:35:07.160
<v Speaker 2>Luna screams like I'm beating her. It's literally insane every

0:35:07.200 --> 0:35:07.960
<v Speaker 2>time we do it.

0:35:08.200 --> 0:35:11.000
<v Speaker 3>Every time, it's like, girl, you've been had this hair.

0:35:11.800 --> 0:35:14.400
<v Speaker 2>So I'm super excited because I got a new product

0:35:14.440 --> 0:35:18.359
<v Speaker 2>from Talia Wajid, and it's perfect to entangle her hair.

0:35:18.400 --> 0:35:20.880
<v Speaker 2>It's perfect for kinky, curly hair, and it makes the

0:35:20.920 --> 0:35:23.000
<v Speaker 2>screaming and the crying mute.

0:35:23.200 --> 0:35:23.520
<v Speaker 3>You know what.

0:35:23.640 --> 0:35:25.680
<v Speaker 1>And our kids have different textured hair, and that's why

0:35:25.719 --> 0:35:27.920
<v Speaker 1>I know this shit actually works because both of our

0:35:28.000 --> 0:35:30.160
<v Speaker 1>kids their hair is a little bit different. And I

0:35:30.280 --> 0:35:32.080
<v Speaker 1>called Mila and I was like, girl, did you try

0:35:32.120 --> 0:35:34.960
<v Speaker 1>this shit? Because I got through washed egg with no

0:35:35.200 --> 0:35:38.160
<v Speaker 1>tears none. A miracle and.

0:35:38.160 --> 0:35:42.680
<v Speaker 2>It smells delicious. Snaw apple and Allo ingredients smells so good.

0:35:42.960 --> 0:35:45.319
<v Speaker 2>It doesn't flake, it keeps it moisturized all day, and

0:35:45.360 --> 0:35:46.800
<v Speaker 2>it has great curl definition.

0:35:47.280 --> 0:35:48.799
<v Speaker 1>I also love it because I only needed to use

0:35:48.840 --> 0:35:51.320
<v Speaker 1>three products to achieve the look and it lasted all

0:35:51.480 --> 0:35:55.120
<v Speaker 1>week long. And this week we are giving our listeners

0:35:55.200 --> 0:35:58.480
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0:35:58.520 --> 0:36:02.000
<v Speaker 1>click the link in this week episode description and use

0:36:02.239 --> 0:36:04.480
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0:36:08.160 --> 0:36:08.600
<v Speaker 2>Stupid.

0:36:08.640 --> 0:36:10.400
<v Speaker 4>I watched his Instagram stories and he ain't at no

0:36:10.480 --> 0:36:14.920
<v Speaker 4>motherfucking gang bitchy at Barclay's, sleep at Barclay's with another bitch,

0:36:15.280 --> 0:36:16.240
<v Speaker 4>like while you got.

0:36:16.000 --> 0:36:19.000
<v Speaker 2>Me in transit to New York, So why didn't you

0:36:19.000 --> 0:36:19.719
<v Speaker 2>take me out of your story?

0:36:19.760 --> 0:36:23.400
<v Speaker 3>You're a dumb asshole, oh dumb as fuck? Right, and

0:36:23.440 --> 0:36:26.400
<v Speaker 3>so why are you? Like, hey, thanks for the free trip.

0:36:26.239 --> 0:36:28.000
<v Speaker 4>Right, So I'm on my way in here. I'm pissed,

0:36:28.400 --> 0:36:31.920
<v Speaker 4>and so randomly I get another long ass text message

0:36:32.320 --> 0:36:35.839
<v Speaker 4>and it's like, yo, Brittany, like I saw in your

0:36:35.880 --> 0:36:37.600
<v Speaker 4>story that you were on your way to New York.

0:36:37.640 --> 0:36:39.239
<v Speaker 4>Because I have posts like hey, you know anybody else

0:36:39.239 --> 0:36:40.720
<v Speaker 4>for some fun? Out my way in New York was popping,

0:36:41.120 --> 0:36:42.680
<v Speaker 4>and I'm just like, who is this? He tells me

0:36:42.680 --> 0:36:44.400
<v Speaker 4>who it is. It's somebody that I knew from like

0:36:44.640 --> 0:36:47.120
<v Speaker 4>way bit I'm talking like middle school. He's like, I've

0:36:47.120 --> 0:36:50.640
<v Speaker 4>been watching your journey. I think it's you're amazing. I

0:36:50.880 --> 0:36:53.040
<v Speaker 4>want to see you when you get to New York.

0:36:53.200 --> 0:36:55.680
<v Speaker 4>And typically I'd be like, nah, hell no like you

0:36:55.800 --> 0:36:57.840
<v Speaker 4>being we like you. You sound like a fan, and

0:36:57.880 --> 0:37:00.319
<v Speaker 4>I've had fans and I've had stalkers, so like, but

0:37:00.360 --> 0:37:00.839
<v Speaker 4>I was like.

0:37:01.840 --> 0:37:03.160
<v Speaker 3>The Spike, let me do some ho shit.

0:37:04.280 --> 0:37:08.400
<v Speaker 4>I'm available, absolutely, absolutely, And he's like, oh, where you staying.

0:37:08.440 --> 0:37:10.400
<v Speaker 4>I'm like, oh, I'm at this hotel, nice hotel in

0:37:10.440 --> 0:37:12.560
<v Speaker 4>Brooklyn's like no, like you're a Manhattan gir, I'm gonna

0:37:12.560 --> 0:37:13.480
<v Speaker 4>put you up in a different hotel.

0:37:13.520 --> 0:37:19.720
<v Speaker 3>Man like these a lot. So then so then.

0:37:19.640 --> 0:37:21.880
<v Speaker 4>He's like, here's the restaurants. I can take you to,

0:37:22.120 --> 0:37:24.560
<v Speaker 4>my strolls whatever, whatever. My driver is gonna pick you up.

0:37:25.200 --> 0:37:27.919
<v Speaker 4>So I'm just like, okay, I'm doing middle school. He's

0:37:27.960 --> 0:37:30.319
<v Speaker 4>been doing big things this middle school right. So now

0:37:30.360 --> 0:37:33.759
<v Speaker 4>he's like he's like deals in weed. He like does

0:37:33.840 --> 0:37:35.879
<v Speaker 4>like a whisked leaf. And then when they like buy

0:37:36.080 --> 0:37:38.240
<v Speaker 4>weed and they white label it. So he white labels

0:37:38.239 --> 0:37:41.120
<v Speaker 4>weed for celebrities. So I'm like, okay, all right to

0:37:41.480 --> 0:37:44.520
<v Speaker 4>talk about it. So we get there, like he's sitting

0:37:44.560 --> 0:37:46.560
<v Speaker 4>in my hotel and I'm like, okay, like you're talking

0:37:46.560 --> 0:37:49.200
<v Speaker 4>to me to the sun come up. I'm like, he's like,

0:37:49.239 --> 0:37:51.400
<v Speaker 4>you know, I was really hoping something. I was like,

0:37:51.480 --> 0:37:53.560
<v Speaker 4>let me tell someth about this pussy sir, Like you

0:37:53.560 --> 0:37:56.440
<v Speaker 4>don't seem stable enough, like I just I don't recommend it,

0:37:56.480 --> 0:37:57.480
<v Speaker 4>like you could smell.

0:37:57.200 --> 0:38:00.680
<v Speaker 2>It, like look, I love it, don't for my child's

0:38:00.680 --> 0:38:01.280
<v Speaker 2>after that.

0:38:01.239 --> 0:38:02.920
<v Speaker 4>Right, And so I was like I'm gonna take a shower,

0:38:03.040 --> 0:38:04.640
<v Speaker 4>like maybe you should go. So took a shower and

0:38:04.680 --> 0:38:06.200
<v Speaker 4>came back. He's like I thought about it. I don't care.

0:38:06.280 --> 0:38:08.000
<v Speaker 4>You can ruin my life. And I was like, no, seriously,

0:38:08.040 --> 0:38:09.600
<v Speaker 4>the most you can do is smell upussy like.

0:38:11.360 --> 0:38:13.160
<v Speaker 3>And I just let him snip it just a little bit.

0:38:14.120 --> 0:38:15.799
<v Speaker 3>You're my hero. You didn't even look it.

0:38:16.080 --> 0:38:20.800
<v Speaker 2>No, you're no, because I was like, you're gonna go.

0:38:21.520 --> 0:38:24.319
<v Speaker 4>We're gonna cry, right, And so then the next day

0:38:24.400 --> 0:38:25.799
<v Speaker 4>I was like, still, there're supposed to be there for

0:38:25.840 --> 0:38:28.400
<v Speaker 4>four days. But then I was like like we went shopping,

0:38:28.520 --> 0:38:30.640
<v Speaker 4>had a great time, but there was something a little

0:38:30.680 --> 0:38:33.439
<v Speaker 4>like a little too possessive about it. So then y'all,

0:38:34.040 --> 0:38:36.879
<v Speaker 4>his driver looks at me in the rear view mirror. Oh,

0:38:37.160 --> 0:38:41.239
<v Speaker 4>slightly lustfully he does. He was looking like and this

0:38:41.320 --> 0:38:43.920
<v Speaker 4>guy says, what the fuck you're looking at? My bitch

0:38:43.960 --> 0:38:46.840
<v Speaker 4>for reaches forward and slaps his driver.

0:38:48.360 --> 0:38:51.560
<v Speaker 3>I'm like, wait, hold the fuck up.

0:38:54.200 --> 0:38:57.719
<v Speaker 4>He slaps the dog ship out of his driver for

0:38:58.040 --> 0:38:59.200
<v Speaker 4>looking at open.

0:38:59.080 --> 0:39:01.960
<v Speaker 3>Hand, driving lustily.

0:39:02.120 --> 0:39:08.520
<v Speaker 4>Yes, bitch, waits you got girl, I'm pussy smell like girl.

0:39:09.400 --> 0:39:11.480
<v Speaker 4>Have you ever seen my recipe for pussy juice? I

0:39:11.560 --> 0:39:12.560
<v Speaker 4>highly recommend it.

0:39:12.600 --> 0:39:13.960
<v Speaker 3>Oh wow, get that one.

0:39:14.440 --> 0:39:17.120
<v Speaker 4>Yes, it's all my stories, It's in my highlights.

0:39:17.280 --> 0:39:19.360
<v Speaker 3>It's like, shit, what did you do?

0:39:19.520 --> 0:39:22.759
<v Speaker 4>Bitch? Bitch? I was like, I got a meeting. I

0:39:22.760 --> 0:39:23.799
<v Speaker 4>gotta get the body.

0:39:24.440 --> 0:39:26.840
<v Speaker 3>My meeting just came up and just came up back and.

0:39:26.719 --> 0:39:30.200
<v Speaker 4>Back in la. All right. I got stuck. I am

0:39:30.280 --> 0:39:32.839
<v Speaker 4>not about to see this through my boy. So so

0:39:33.080 --> 0:39:35.120
<v Speaker 4>I'm like, for real, I gotta go. I like text

0:39:35.120 --> 0:39:38.359
<v Speaker 4>my assist and was like call me act soberly, like

0:39:38.640 --> 0:39:40.800
<v Speaker 4>just run with it, and she like she knows sometimes

0:39:40.840 --> 0:39:41.960
<v Speaker 4>I'll be on my whole shop. So she knows.

0:39:42.000 --> 0:39:42.719
<v Speaker 3>She like she got me.

0:39:42.800 --> 0:39:45.400
<v Speaker 4>She got me. So I get my bags. My assistant

0:39:45.480 --> 0:39:47.520
<v Speaker 4>like books my flight and I'm like, yo, you know,

0:39:47.640 --> 0:39:48.720
<v Speaker 4>like you don't got to take me to the airport.

0:39:48.760 --> 0:39:51.279
<v Speaker 4>He's like, oh, but I will. So he leaves. The

0:39:51.360 --> 0:39:53.799
<v Speaker 4>driver comes back, takes me to the airport. Y'all. I

0:39:53.840 --> 0:39:56.680
<v Speaker 4>get to the motherfucking airport. The driver takes out my bag.

0:39:57.400 --> 0:40:01.640
<v Speaker 4>The driver takes out another bag and I'm like, what's

0:40:01.640 --> 0:40:05.440
<v Speaker 4>that stuffing? What's that? And he's like, I can't live

0:40:05.440 --> 0:40:05.960
<v Speaker 4>without you.

0:40:06.239 --> 0:40:09.080
<v Speaker 3>The driver, no dude.

0:40:11.320 --> 0:40:14.839
<v Speaker 4>To get killed. And he's like, I'm coming with you

0:40:15.160 --> 0:40:18.399
<v Speaker 4>back to California. And I'm like like, no, the fuck,

0:40:18.480 --> 0:40:18.799
<v Speaker 4>you're not.

0:40:19.239 --> 0:40:19.880
<v Speaker 3>I'm scared.

0:40:19.960 --> 0:40:21.200
<v Speaker 4>No the but I'm scared.

0:40:21.280 --> 0:40:24.640
<v Speaker 3>You're scared, but I am fright, tend right.

0:40:25.040 --> 0:40:28.279
<v Speaker 4>And so he's like he's like, I know you, I

0:40:28.320 --> 0:40:30.480
<v Speaker 4>know you, and mind you. He was like, I've been

0:40:30.520 --> 0:40:33.000
<v Speaker 4>checking for you throughout the years. I'm like spilling all

0:40:33.040 --> 0:40:35.160
<v Speaker 4>the tea. So I went to high school with an

0:40:35.200 --> 0:40:37.759
<v Speaker 4>actor who's like super famous now yeah tea, and I

0:40:37.760 --> 0:40:38.440
<v Speaker 4>had a crustion on him.

0:40:38.440 --> 0:40:47.399
<v Speaker 3>Back a tell him I'm looking for I've been It's

0:40:47.440 --> 0:40:48.359
<v Speaker 3>my man. It's my man.

0:40:48.600 --> 0:40:51.279
<v Speaker 4>Well, well maybe can we both can we can we

0:40:51.280 --> 0:40:54.440
<v Speaker 4>just maybe for both variety, Maybe we can both go

0:40:54.520 --> 0:40:59.760
<v Speaker 4>for careful you know dudes together, baby, we might politic

0:41:00.160 --> 0:41:04.000
<v Speaker 4>my yoga post together. And but like, let me be transparent, right,

0:41:04.120 --> 0:41:07.839
<v Speaker 4>he ain't fucking with me, like like like we were

0:41:07.840 --> 0:41:10.680
<v Speaker 4>supposed to be in Australia. It ain't work out, and

0:41:10.719 --> 0:41:14.239
<v Speaker 4>like he ain't really been he ain't really like so

0:41:15.320 --> 0:41:17.399
<v Speaker 4>but we all went to school together and he was like, yeah,

0:41:17.400 --> 0:41:18.839
<v Speaker 4>I know you'd be trying to fuck on yah y'ah.

0:41:19.000 --> 0:41:20.640
<v Speaker 3>Oh yeah, got that right.

0:41:20.880 --> 0:41:22.600
<v Speaker 4>He's like I did that. And I was like, oh,

0:41:22.640 --> 0:41:25.319
<v Speaker 4>so you why I can't get yah yah? Draws you

0:41:25.440 --> 0:41:27.799
<v Speaker 4>the reason? You the reason he said he did what

0:41:27.880 --> 0:41:29.439
<v Speaker 4>he did, like I did it that ship.

0:41:29.800 --> 0:41:31.400
<v Speaker 3>He's a crazy lady.

0:41:31.520 --> 0:41:35.000
<v Speaker 4>So anyway, so I'm like, he's like, I know you

0:41:35.000 --> 0:41:38.239
<v Speaker 4>you're a runner and if now let you get on

0:41:38.280 --> 0:41:40.799
<v Speaker 4>this flight, I will never see you again. And I

0:41:40.840 --> 0:41:42.640
<v Speaker 4>was like, you don't know what's gonna happen, Like this

0:41:42.719 --> 0:41:44.640
<v Speaker 4>plane could crash and I could die. And he was like.

0:41:46.200 --> 0:41:48.160
<v Speaker 3>And I was like, yo, let me get this is

0:41:48.239 --> 0:41:49.320
<v Speaker 3>all happening at the airport.

0:41:50.480 --> 0:41:54.240
<v Speaker 4>A report at JFK just walking around in the wild

0:41:54.280 --> 0:41:57.480
<v Speaker 4>and people he knows, God, I'm scared. Yeah, so I

0:41:57.520 --> 0:42:01.000
<v Speaker 4>needed to say his full name. People women watch watch clubs.

0:42:01.360 --> 0:42:04.400
<v Speaker 4>So I get on the flight and he like and

0:42:04.600 --> 0:42:07.279
<v Speaker 4>he was just like you left me, and I was

0:42:07.280 --> 0:42:11.920
<v Speaker 4>just like yo, yo do. And so then that's where

0:42:11.960 --> 0:42:13.719
<v Speaker 4>the HR message comes from.

0:42:13.800 --> 0:42:16.320
<v Speaker 3>Like oh, okay, this is wow.

0:42:16.920 --> 0:42:21.480
<v Speaker 4>And then all those messages yeah, and so I'm like whoa.

0:42:22.120 --> 0:42:24.400
<v Speaker 4>And so maybe the more of the story is like,

0:42:24.480 --> 0:42:28.200
<v Speaker 4>don't do spiteful ship. I would have never ever hung

0:42:28.239 --> 0:42:31.640
<v Speaker 4>out with this man unless I had gotten that odd

0:42:31.880 --> 0:42:33.799
<v Speaker 4>And when the odd thing happened with the other dude, like,

0:42:33.840 --> 0:42:35.920
<v Speaker 4>I sent one cryptic DM and I was like, I

0:42:35.960 --> 0:42:37.879
<v Speaker 4>just want to know, did your team win?

0:42:38.960 --> 0:42:41.200
<v Speaker 3>Not a cryptic DM from you?

0:42:41.200 --> 0:42:43.000
<v Speaker 4>No, he didn't respond that day. He didn't and then

0:42:43.040 --> 0:42:44.080
<v Speaker 4>he was like blowing me up.

0:42:44.239 --> 0:42:44.759
<v Speaker 3>The whole trip.

0:42:45.000 --> 0:42:46.640
<v Speaker 4>And I'm like, no, I'm good, I'm good.

0:42:46.840 --> 0:42:47.840
<v Speaker 3>I didn't have no hotels.

0:42:47.880 --> 0:42:49.560
<v Speaker 4>I never spoke to him again. I don't play that

0:42:49.600 --> 0:42:51.239
<v Speaker 4>boundaries boundaries.

0:42:51.960 --> 0:42:54.879
<v Speaker 2>Wow, that's an epic psycho crazy.

0:42:54.680 --> 0:42:56.480
<v Speaker 3>That's an epic story on boundaries.

0:42:56.600 --> 0:42:59.279
<v Speaker 2>Wait, okay, so I have a question about boundaries. So

0:42:59.560 --> 0:43:03.319
<v Speaker 2>like we talked about your experience and how you've like

0:43:03.400 --> 0:43:06.960
<v Speaker 2>made this drastic change and like that like upstarted all

0:43:06.960 --> 0:43:10.560
<v Speaker 2>this other amazing shit. But like, how would you say, Like,

0:43:10.640 --> 0:43:12.960
<v Speaker 2>because I also stopped you a little bit, did some research.

0:43:13.040 --> 0:43:15.520
<v Speaker 2>I know you've had like you know, family history traumas

0:43:15.560 --> 0:43:16.120
<v Speaker 2>and shit like.

0:43:16.080 --> 0:43:16.480
<v Speaker 4>We all have.

0:43:16.680 --> 0:43:19.239
<v Speaker 2>But obviously like you have this abusive relationship with this

0:43:19.320 --> 0:43:22.440
<v Speaker 2>very Christian baby daddy, and then like I think women

0:43:22.520 --> 0:43:25.440
<v Speaker 2>have a hard time setting boundaries with men because we'd

0:43:25.480 --> 0:43:28.520
<v Speaker 2>be getting digmatized and were all were so programmed to

0:43:28.520 --> 0:43:30.640
<v Speaker 2>be like you need a partner, you need this person

0:43:30.719 --> 0:43:33.160
<v Speaker 2>and like the comfort almost even if you're unhappy you

0:43:33.280 --> 0:43:37.120
<v Speaker 2>come from like toxic ast relationships and me personally, I'm

0:43:37.120 --> 0:43:39.759
<v Speaker 2>all always talking about childhood trauma and how to like

0:43:39.840 --> 0:43:42.799
<v Speaker 2>heal from it because that's that's your whole adult life

0:43:42.800 --> 0:43:46.680
<v Speaker 2>if you're if you care about growing, it's all about yeah, right,

0:43:47.120 --> 0:43:50.600
<v Speaker 2>So how would you say, like, you've your experience has

0:43:50.680 --> 0:43:54.640
<v Speaker 2>really like in both ways who you've attracted, because how

0:43:54.680 --> 0:43:56.440
<v Speaker 2>the fuck did you? First of all, you chose your

0:43:56.440 --> 0:44:00.239
<v Speaker 2>baby daddy, as we all show, But like I think

0:44:00.239 --> 0:44:02.399
<v Speaker 2>women have a hard time shifting that, Like it's one

0:44:02.400 --> 0:44:04.520
<v Speaker 2>thing to recognize that you have some things that you

0:44:04.560 --> 0:44:06.360
<v Speaker 2>need to work on. It's a whole different thing to

0:44:06.480 --> 0:44:09.480
<v Speaker 2>act on them and then choose a partner based on

0:44:09.640 --> 0:44:11.920
<v Speaker 2>the choices and the changes that you've made. I think

0:44:11.920 --> 0:44:16.560
<v Speaker 2>when you've grown up in like abusive situations trauma, it's

0:44:16.600 --> 0:44:20.439
<v Speaker 2>easy to attract relationships and partners like that because it's familiar, right,

0:44:20.760 --> 0:44:23.040
<v Speaker 2>But like, how do you like first to recognize that,

0:44:23.080 --> 0:44:25.400
<v Speaker 2>like until like maybe it's not you getting hit in

0:44:25.480 --> 0:44:27.680
<v Speaker 2>the face or whatever, even though that's the case for

0:44:27.719 --> 0:44:31.480
<v Speaker 2>a lot of women, Like what really made you start

0:44:31.880 --> 0:44:34.640
<v Speaker 2>acting on those boundaries and the people you choose, people

0:44:34.760 --> 0:44:36.719
<v Speaker 2>who share your energy, because that's hard for me.

0:44:37.120 --> 0:44:39.799
<v Speaker 4>Yeah, And I think, like you said that, childhood trauma,

0:44:39.880 --> 0:44:42.040
<v Speaker 4>it permeates every facet of your life, how you show

0:44:42.080 --> 0:44:44.239
<v Speaker 4>up in corporate how you show up in friendships, how

0:44:44.280 --> 0:44:46.600
<v Speaker 4>you show up as a parent. In a lot of ways,

0:44:46.719 --> 0:44:48.920
<v Speaker 4>what we end up being led by is fear instead

0:44:48.920 --> 0:44:52.719
<v Speaker 4>of love, fear of loss, fear of judgment, fear of abandonment.

0:44:52.800 --> 0:44:54.879
<v Speaker 4>Instead of I give from a place of love, It's

0:44:54.880 --> 0:44:57.040
<v Speaker 4>like I give from a place of like, please love

0:44:57.120 --> 0:45:01.080
<v Speaker 4>me back. And I think that is where mindfulness becomes

0:45:01.200 --> 0:45:03.919
<v Speaker 4>very important and a lot of times people are telling

0:45:04.000 --> 0:45:05.839
<v Speaker 4>me like, I don't like to meditate because I can't

0:45:05.880 --> 0:45:09.000
<v Speaker 4>quiet my mind. The point isn't ever to quiet your mind.

0:45:09.040 --> 0:45:11.480
<v Speaker 4>It's to create some separation so that you can then

0:45:11.560 --> 0:45:15.759
<v Speaker 4>observe yourself so that then you can say, Hm, why

0:45:15.800 --> 0:45:19.080
<v Speaker 4>did I make that decision? And it's how bothered am

0:45:19.080 --> 0:45:22.080
<v Speaker 4>I by the outcome of that? And so I think

0:45:22.320 --> 0:45:25.799
<v Speaker 4>for me since my ex husband, you know, and like

0:45:25.920 --> 0:45:28.560
<v Speaker 4>these three random stories I told you, those are times

0:45:28.560 --> 0:45:32.000
<v Speaker 4>where I know that I fucking chose chaos. Like I

0:45:32.160 --> 0:45:35.319
<v Speaker 4>kid you not, I was like, mindful moment, Brittany, what

0:45:35.360 --> 0:45:38.160
<v Speaker 4>are we doing? How do we feel violence?

0:45:38.960 --> 0:45:39.160
<v Speaker 3>Right?

0:45:39.920 --> 0:45:42.520
<v Speaker 4>Because for a little razzle dazzle. But outside of like

0:45:42.640 --> 0:45:45.759
<v Speaker 4>those scenarios that I told you about, which I feel

0:45:45.800 --> 0:45:49.000
<v Speaker 4>like I'm mindfully chose, I come across some of the

0:45:49.040 --> 0:45:52.239
<v Speaker 4>most amazing and phenomenal you know, and I date men

0:45:52.320 --> 0:45:56.080
<v Speaker 4>and women, amazing phenomenal women and men who cherish me

0:45:56.160 --> 0:45:59.319
<v Speaker 4>and treat me great. And I think it's not just

0:46:00.680 --> 0:46:03.400
<v Speaker 4>what you'll tolerate from other people, but it's the boundaries

0:46:03.440 --> 0:46:06.800
<v Speaker 4>that you set with yourself, which is which is your habits,

0:46:06.880 --> 0:46:10.759
<v Speaker 4>which is you know, deciding who you are and not

0:46:11.080 --> 0:46:14.759
<v Speaker 4>wavering from that. So when I tell somebody like, oh, no,

0:46:15.040 --> 0:46:18.200
<v Speaker 4>like I cannot go on a date with you because

0:46:18.239 --> 0:46:20.800
<v Speaker 4>I have to wake up at five am to meditate.

0:46:21.239 --> 0:46:23.520
<v Speaker 4>I can't hang out tonight because it's a full moon

0:46:23.640 --> 0:46:26.640
<v Speaker 4>and I need to ritualize some things. Those little things

0:46:26.680 --> 0:46:29.480
<v Speaker 4>like that teaches people that like, oh, she's got boundaries,

0:46:29.719 --> 0:46:33.719
<v Speaker 4>Oh she's got routines, and I don't get the opportunity

0:46:33.760 --> 0:46:36.120
<v Speaker 4>to take over her life. I get to integrate in it.

0:46:36.480 --> 0:46:40.399
<v Speaker 4>And that's how I approach relationships and partners is to say, hey,

0:46:40.480 --> 0:46:43.759
<v Speaker 4>I'm whole and complete, and I like the variety of

0:46:43.800 --> 0:46:46.840
<v Speaker 4>other humans. Are you also that? Because if so, do

0:46:46.880 --> 0:46:49.760
<v Speaker 4>you want to orbit around each other for a time

0:46:51.160 --> 0:46:54.440
<v Speaker 4>and so so? Yeah, I think for that it's really important.

0:46:54.480 --> 0:46:57.319
<v Speaker 4>And the boundary setting, I think a lot of it,

0:46:57.360 --> 0:46:59.520
<v Speaker 4>and nobody wants to hear it. Is you gotta And

0:46:59.560 --> 0:47:01.840
<v Speaker 4>this is like Christian work. You got to consecrate yourself.

0:47:02.120 --> 0:47:05.200
<v Speaker 4>You have to step back and figure out who you

0:47:05.320 --> 0:47:08.640
<v Speaker 4>are when people aren't telling you who you are. And

0:47:08.680 --> 0:47:11.160
<v Speaker 4>that's what traveling got to do for me. I got

0:47:11.200 --> 0:47:13.600
<v Speaker 4>to to test my identity and see how I show

0:47:13.680 --> 0:47:15.560
<v Speaker 4>up in the world. Who are people telling you were

0:47:15.600 --> 0:47:20.160
<v Speaker 4>before people were telling me that I was anxious, that

0:47:20.360 --> 0:47:25.319
<v Speaker 4>I was too much. I was told that that I

0:47:25.400 --> 0:47:28.560
<v Speaker 4>was smart and would do well in corporate, that I

0:47:28.600 --> 0:47:32.439
<v Speaker 4>wasn't an entrepreneur, that because I decided to be a mother,

0:47:32.520 --> 0:47:36.480
<v Speaker 4>that my life was over, that I was too bubbly,

0:47:36.520 --> 0:47:40.239
<v Speaker 4>too friendly, and so I really would pack that on.

0:47:40.320 --> 0:47:43.480
<v Speaker 4>And again it's not just partners. I remember I used

0:47:43.480 --> 0:47:46.160
<v Speaker 4>to have anxiety so bad that I would faint, Like

0:47:46.160 --> 0:47:48.520
<v Speaker 4>I would just get upset and boom, I'm like on

0:47:48.600 --> 0:47:52.680
<v Speaker 4>the ground, face red. And it was either that or

0:47:52.719 --> 0:47:55.600
<v Speaker 4>like physical violence. And I remember when I came back

0:47:55.600 --> 0:47:58.279
<v Speaker 4>and I had told everybody like like, I'm not who

0:47:58.360 --> 0:47:59.799
<v Speaker 4>y'all thought I was. And I was on the phone

0:47:59.800 --> 0:48:01.920
<v Speaker 4>with my mom and she's like, ooh, that sounds like

0:48:01.960 --> 0:48:04.400
<v Speaker 4>a frustrating thing. You know. Don't don't go doing what

0:48:04.400 --> 0:48:06.760
<v Speaker 4>you're doing, fighting or fainting. And I was like, actually,

0:48:06.800 --> 0:48:08.520
<v Speaker 4>I don't. I don't do that anymore. That's not who

0:48:08.520 --> 0:48:10.239
<v Speaker 4>I am. And she was like mm hm. And so

0:48:10.320 --> 0:48:13.319
<v Speaker 4>from that moment on, I started telling people, Hey, I

0:48:13.360 --> 0:48:16.200
<v Speaker 4>cannot control who you think I am or how you

0:48:16.280 --> 0:48:18.359
<v Speaker 4>see me, but I'm telling you that that's not who

0:48:18.440 --> 0:48:20.320
<v Speaker 4>I am. And you can say whatever the fuck you

0:48:20.360 --> 0:48:22.520
<v Speaker 4>want to say about me behind my back, but don't

0:48:22.560 --> 0:48:24.480
<v Speaker 4>bring that shit to my face. Do not tell me

0:48:24.520 --> 0:48:27.160
<v Speaker 4>who I am to my face. And when they did,

0:48:27.239 --> 0:48:29.919
<v Speaker 4>it was a two year stint where I would be like, Hey,

0:48:30.160 --> 0:48:32.480
<v Speaker 4>you're on that bullshit. You're telling me something that I'm

0:48:32.480 --> 0:48:35.080
<v Speaker 4>telling you I'm not, and I would be like, I'm disengaging,

0:48:35.120 --> 0:48:37.120
<v Speaker 4>and that's where the hr HO probably came from. I started,

0:48:37.160 --> 0:48:38.320
<v Speaker 4>I called it this again. I'm like, I'm going to

0:48:38.360 --> 0:48:40.880
<v Speaker 4>disengage in this conversation. Please don't call me for two weeks,

0:48:40.920 --> 0:48:43.719
<v Speaker 4>and I will hang up anybody's face, mother, anybody, and

0:48:43.760 --> 0:48:45.759
<v Speaker 4>I'll call back in two weeks and say, hey, I

0:48:45.840 --> 0:48:48.040
<v Speaker 4>really love you and I want to move forward, and

0:48:48.080 --> 0:48:49.480
<v Speaker 4>I think the best way is for us to talk

0:48:49.480 --> 0:48:51.680
<v Speaker 4>about what happened two weeks ago. Are you ready to

0:48:51.719 --> 0:48:54.879
<v Speaker 4>have that conversation? Which is really hard thing to do,

0:48:55.239 --> 0:48:57.879
<v Speaker 4>but when you have fell to the depths of hell

0:48:58.280 --> 0:49:00.839
<v Speaker 4>and you're like, I clearly don't love mine and I've

0:49:00.880 --> 0:49:05.000
<v Speaker 4>clearly chosen love and all of these other titles and

0:49:05.040 --> 0:49:10.600
<v Speaker 4>accolades over my authentic self. And you know how sad

0:49:10.640 --> 0:49:14.360
<v Speaker 4>and how dark and how how like lonely. That darkness

0:49:14.440 --> 0:49:17.160
<v Speaker 4>is what you were like. I will never go back

0:49:17.160 --> 0:49:18.960
<v Speaker 4>there again, and I will do whatever it takes. And

0:49:19.000 --> 0:49:21.719
<v Speaker 4>so now my journey is every day, how do I

0:49:21.760 --> 0:49:24.799
<v Speaker 4>become more me? More me? How do I continue to

0:49:24.880 --> 0:49:29.360
<v Speaker 4>test who I am and what I say and believe

0:49:29.400 --> 0:49:32.560
<v Speaker 4>in that and what I've been able to accomplish with

0:49:32.719 --> 0:49:37.120
<v Speaker 4>that finding of self has sometimes I cry because I'm

0:49:37.160 --> 0:49:39.600
<v Speaker 4>just like, I cannot believe that I've been able to

0:49:39.880 --> 0:49:43.040
<v Speaker 4>reprogram my mind and recreate this life in such a

0:49:43.080 --> 0:49:47.279
<v Speaker 4>way that I'm almost unrecognizable. I look younger now than

0:49:47.320 --> 0:49:48.919
<v Speaker 4>I did in pictures when I was twenty three.

0:49:49.320 --> 0:49:50.840
<v Speaker 3>It's insane that shit will aige you.

0:49:51.000 --> 0:49:53.839
<v Speaker 2>Not being happy, not living as yourself, showing up as

0:49:53.880 --> 0:49:56.520
<v Speaker 2>yourself will damn the fuck out of you, Like you

0:49:56.560 --> 0:49:59.000
<v Speaker 2>will start looking like a different person. And that's shit,

0:49:59.120 --> 0:50:02.239
<v Speaker 2>is true. I've seen like pictures of myself an unhappy relationship.

0:50:02.239 --> 0:50:04.279
<v Speaker 3>I'm like, oh, bitch, you're not doing well. Yeah, you

0:50:04.280 --> 0:50:05.000
<v Speaker 3>weren't doing well.

0:50:05.120 --> 0:50:06.359
<v Speaker 4>Yeah you weren't doing well.

0:50:06.360 --> 0:50:07.560
<v Speaker 3>Who would you say you are now?

0:50:09.239 --> 0:50:13.520
<v Speaker 4>I would say now, I'm free, I am free, I

0:50:13.560 --> 0:50:20.000
<v Speaker 4>am authentic, I lean into that. I'm a nurturer and

0:50:20.320 --> 0:50:25.239
<v Speaker 4>I am discerning. I think that I am wise. I

0:50:25.280 --> 0:50:28.520
<v Speaker 4>think that wise enough to know that I don't know

0:50:28.560 --> 0:50:32.120
<v Speaker 4>shit that kind of way. And I think that I

0:50:32.120 --> 0:50:33.799
<v Speaker 4>think that I'm a lover. I think I'm a lover

0:50:33.880 --> 0:50:37.400
<v Speaker 4>of humanity. And before I was afraid of humanity, I

0:50:37.480 --> 0:50:39.680
<v Speaker 4>was I was. I was scared of people and scared

0:50:39.680 --> 0:50:42.799
<v Speaker 4>of interactions and scared of either they would take something

0:50:42.840 --> 0:50:45.239
<v Speaker 4>from me or reject me. And now I live my

0:50:45.320 --> 0:50:49.520
<v Speaker 4>life not requiring acceptance of anyone, but also not denying that.

0:50:49.960 --> 0:50:52.360
<v Speaker 4>And I think that, like I'm like, damn, okay, cool,

0:50:53.800 --> 0:50:57.200
<v Speaker 4>let's go, you know, yeah, and I'm myself.

0:50:58.040 --> 0:51:00.000
<v Speaker 3>Yeah, that's what a beautiful journey.

0:51:00.080 --> 0:51:03.920
<v Speaker 1>I mean, I mean, I feel like this conversation is

0:51:03.960 --> 0:51:06.279
<v Speaker 1>so necessary, I think for both of us, and I

0:51:06.280 --> 0:51:08.759
<v Speaker 1>think for the people listening too, like knowing that like

0:51:08.960 --> 0:51:12.800
<v Speaker 1>it really it's sometimes it's just taking the smallest step

0:51:13.360 --> 0:51:17.120
<v Speaker 1>to finding who you are. And like I know, for

0:51:17.360 --> 0:51:19.920
<v Speaker 1>especially for moms, like you know, some moms, like we

0:51:19.920 --> 0:51:22.239
<v Speaker 1>don't have the luxury of like leaving our kids for

0:51:22.280 --> 0:51:25.000
<v Speaker 1>four months to go find ourselves, you know, Like so

0:51:25.160 --> 0:51:25.839
<v Speaker 1>moms are like.

0:51:25.840 --> 0:51:27.880
<v Speaker 4>Well, how the fuck do I do that? How the

0:51:27.880 --> 0:51:29.920
<v Speaker 4>fuck do I mean, I know, don't. I can't leave

0:51:29.920 --> 0:51:30.719
<v Speaker 4>my child for four months.

0:51:30.719 --> 0:51:33.280
<v Speaker 3>I don't know. If I don't, I couldn't.

0:51:33.480 --> 0:51:35.520
<v Speaker 1>But I know that they're like even me, like today

0:51:35.560 --> 0:51:38.640
<v Speaker 1>saying like, Okay, I need to create space in my life.

0:51:38.680 --> 0:51:39.120
<v Speaker 4>I've been it.

0:51:39.600 --> 0:51:41.600
<v Speaker 1>I have to create space in my life. I have

0:51:41.680 --> 0:51:43.560
<v Speaker 1>to make it a priority, even if I have to

0:51:43.600 --> 0:51:44.879
<v Speaker 1>fucking schedule it.

0:51:44.840 --> 0:51:46.680
<v Speaker 4>In my goddamn Google calendar.

0:51:47.640 --> 0:51:49.239
<v Speaker 3>And you will to do that.

0:51:49.320 --> 0:51:52.640
<v Speaker 1>I think that that's really really important, And because we

0:51:52.640 --> 0:51:56.960
<v Speaker 1>do ourselves such a disservice and suffer so much, like

0:51:57.360 --> 0:52:01.760
<v Speaker 1>just avoiding ourselves and avoiding the work and not setting

0:52:01.840 --> 0:52:05.759
<v Speaker 1>the boundaries. And sometimes boundaries can feel I don't know

0:52:05.800 --> 0:52:07.799
<v Speaker 1>that word, and I think sometimes it gets a bad

0:52:07.840 --> 0:52:12.960
<v Speaker 1>connotation of like negativity or coldness or heartlessness. But I

0:52:13.000 --> 0:52:15.799
<v Speaker 1>think you create so much more space for love and

0:52:15.920 --> 0:52:17.680
<v Speaker 1>light when you have those boundaries.

0:52:17.719 --> 0:52:20.640
<v Speaker 4>Absolutely. And one of the things that and I love

0:52:20.680 --> 0:52:22.800
<v Speaker 4>what you said. A quote come to mind is like

0:52:22.800 --> 0:52:24.960
<v Speaker 4>everywhere you go, there you are, and people got to

0:52:24.960 --> 0:52:27.799
<v Speaker 4>so we gott to stop running from ourselves. But when

0:52:27.840 --> 0:52:31.520
<v Speaker 4>it comes to that boundary setting, I think it's when

0:52:31.560 --> 0:52:34.000
<v Speaker 4>you first start boundaries, you're like, ah, I get away

0:52:34.040 --> 0:52:36.759
<v Speaker 4>from me because you're just like pent up aggression and

0:52:36.800 --> 0:52:38.879
<v Speaker 4>anger and you're trying to protect yourself. But I think

0:52:38.920 --> 0:52:41.440
<v Speaker 4>the deeper you get in your boundaries, the softer you

0:52:41.480 --> 0:52:43.680
<v Speaker 4>can be, and the more you can say, like, it

0:52:43.680 --> 0:52:45.440
<v Speaker 4>doesn't have to be this big blowout, it can just

0:52:45.480 --> 0:52:48.240
<v Speaker 4>be you know, actually this doesn't work for me. Actually

0:52:48.280 --> 0:52:53.120
<v Speaker 4>I'm gonna unsubscribe to this interaction. And you know, learning

0:52:53.239 --> 0:52:56.160
<v Speaker 4>that is the game changer. So one of the things

0:52:56.400 --> 0:52:59.080
<v Speaker 4>that I mean, this is years of therapy and work,

0:52:59.239 --> 0:53:02.799
<v Speaker 4>but I learned that it's okay to be used. I

0:53:02.880 --> 0:53:05.360
<v Speaker 4>want to be used. I want to be used in

0:53:05.400 --> 0:53:08.279
<v Speaker 4>the way that I prescribed I can be used for.

0:53:08.680 --> 0:53:11.600
<v Speaker 4>And so when I can say this is how you could,

0:53:11.640 --> 0:53:15.560
<v Speaker 4>you can empty my vessel right and everything else is

0:53:15.600 --> 0:53:18.160
<v Speaker 4>off limits, then I don't have to feel like a

0:53:18.200 --> 0:53:21.960
<v Speaker 4>bad person for upholding boundaries because you just were out

0:53:21.960 --> 0:53:25.000
<v Speaker 4>of my wheelhouse. So when it comes to you know,

0:53:25.719 --> 0:53:28.600
<v Speaker 4>people wanting to tell me their life story as I'm

0:53:28.600 --> 0:53:31.000
<v Speaker 4>walking down the street because something about me just does that,

0:53:31.400 --> 0:53:34.240
<v Speaker 4>you know, And so then it's like, well, I feel

0:53:34.239 --> 0:53:36.440
<v Speaker 4>bad because I like, I'm a good person and I

0:53:36.480 --> 0:53:38.760
<v Speaker 4>want to help and I actually get invested in people's story.

0:53:38.960 --> 0:53:40.720
<v Speaker 4>But a couple of things. You get invested in people's

0:53:40.719 --> 0:53:43.239
<v Speaker 4>story and their success, and they aren't always invested in

0:53:43.320 --> 0:53:46.680
<v Speaker 4>their own Yes, and so now you've depleted your energy

0:53:46.760 --> 0:53:49.480
<v Speaker 4>and you could have helped somebody who is actually ready.

0:53:49.840 --> 0:53:52.320
<v Speaker 4>So that's why that boundary is important, because your energy

0:53:52.360 --> 0:53:56.080
<v Speaker 4>is finite. So instead of listening to people's stories, I

0:53:56.080 --> 0:53:58.440
<v Speaker 4>have a set of questions, and I'm like, if you

0:53:58.520 --> 0:54:01.640
<v Speaker 4>really want help, you can book a free fifteen minute call,

0:54:01.880 --> 0:54:03.399
<v Speaker 4>and then after that, I'm going to try to sell

0:54:03.440 --> 0:54:07.399
<v Speaker 4>you something a very expensive coaching program, and so very

0:54:07.480 --> 0:54:09.920
<v Speaker 4>like it just is what it is. So then now

0:54:10.120 --> 0:54:12.680
<v Speaker 4>I know that I can live in my purpose because

0:54:12.760 --> 0:54:16.040
<v Speaker 4>I'm not being out of order by constantly being pulled

0:54:16.320 --> 0:54:19.479
<v Speaker 4>to help other people. Because if we went to help

0:54:19.560 --> 0:54:21.520
<v Speaker 4>everyone who needed us, we would never make it out

0:54:21.560 --> 0:54:23.600
<v Speaker 4>of our front door. So we have to learn to

0:54:23.600 --> 0:54:26.640
<v Speaker 4>put our blinders on and to decide who and what

0:54:26.719 --> 0:54:30.480
<v Speaker 4>it is that we pour out to and under what circumstances,

0:54:30.719 --> 0:54:33.360
<v Speaker 4>so that we can then be fruitful in how we

0:54:33.400 --> 0:54:35.279
<v Speaker 4>show up in the world and how we give back.

0:54:35.360 --> 0:54:39.560
<v Speaker 4>So boundaries isn't about shutting people out. It's about walking

0:54:39.600 --> 0:54:43.040
<v Speaker 4>in your purpose and in a way that will actually

0:54:43.120 --> 0:54:45.799
<v Speaker 4>make a difference in the world, and that is that's

0:54:45.800 --> 0:54:48.120
<v Speaker 4>where my mindset coaching comes in, and that's where I'm like, no,

0:54:48.239 --> 0:54:50.680
<v Speaker 4>let's just reframe that. It's not no, I don't want

0:54:50.680 --> 0:54:54.160
<v Speaker 4>to help my mom pay her mortgage. It's I'm using

0:54:54.239 --> 0:54:57.759
<v Speaker 4>this money to send to Haiti because I believe that

0:54:58.320 --> 0:55:01.200
<v Speaker 4>those kids are important and what they need. You know,

0:55:01.440 --> 0:55:05.320
<v Speaker 4>there is that I love my mom. That's just not it.

0:55:05.400 --> 0:55:08.439
<v Speaker 4>That's not what it is. So so I think that's also

0:55:08.480 --> 0:55:10.880
<v Speaker 4>like boundary set setting, you know, one on two one

0:55:10.920 --> 0:55:11.360
<v Speaker 4>one o.

0:55:11.440 --> 0:55:14.120
<v Speaker 3>Two one o two. Yeah.

0:55:14.440 --> 0:55:17.719
<v Speaker 2>Yeah, I think it's important too, like because listening to

0:55:17.760 --> 0:55:20.040
<v Speaker 2>your story and listening to what you're talking about. I

0:55:20.080 --> 0:55:23.040
<v Speaker 2>remember when I first took the steps to like leave

0:55:23.040 --> 0:55:25.520
<v Speaker 2>my baby daddy. It was something like traumatic and big

0:55:25.560 --> 0:55:28.400
<v Speaker 2>like that, and I went went played taughter what you

0:55:28.520 --> 0:55:31.960
<v Speaker 2>taughttered that line a lot. But when I first finally

0:55:32.000 --> 0:55:34.160
<v Speaker 2>got out of it and finally got powered and like

0:55:34.160 --> 0:55:36.520
<v Speaker 2>like okay, I'm here. I took a long time to

0:55:36.520 --> 0:55:37.919
<v Speaker 2>get I knew for a long time it was wrong.

0:55:37.960 --> 0:55:39.800
<v Speaker 2>I took a long time to get here. I remember

0:55:39.800 --> 0:55:41.040
<v Speaker 2>I went out with a guy and he like said

0:55:41.040 --> 0:55:42.680
<v Speaker 2>something crazy to me and my baby Daddy used to

0:55:42.719 --> 0:55:44.239
<v Speaker 2>talk crazy to me, so I was kind of used

0:55:44.239 --> 0:55:46.680
<v Speaker 2>to it, but I was so not in that place anymore.

0:55:46.760 --> 0:55:48.759
<v Speaker 2>I was like, my fangs must have come out. I

0:55:48.760 --> 0:55:50.160
<v Speaker 2>was like, get the fuck out. I'm like, I don't

0:55:50.160 --> 0:55:51.719
<v Speaker 2>know who the fuck. But I was just like, you're

0:55:51.760 --> 0:55:54.640
<v Speaker 2>not gonna send me back to that place by any means.

0:55:55.040 --> 0:55:57.440
<v Speaker 2>But I think sometimes in life, when you are programmed

0:55:57.480 --> 0:56:00.279
<v Speaker 2>a certain way into certain things, you forget you'll get

0:56:00.320 --> 0:56:01.960
<v Speaker 2>in new relationships that are a little bit different. They

0:56:01.960 --> 0:56:03.640
<v Speaker 2>don't look just like that, so you're kind of like

0:56:03.680 --> 0:56:06.560
<v Speaker 2>relaxed in it, but they still like cross your boundaries

0:56:06.600 --> 0:56:08.480
<v Speaker 2>in other way other ways, and you have to be

0:56:08.640 --> 0:56:12.840
<v Speaker 2>like constantly exercising and reevaluating because you can grow, but

0:56:12.920 --> 0:56:15.799
<v Speaker 2>if you let yourself get comfortable, you can still kind

0:56:15.800 --> 0:56:18.040
<v Speaker 2>of totter and teeter into those things that are still

0:56:18.360 --> 0:56:20.520
<v Speaker 2>not quite this but not quite what you need either.

0:56:20.880 --> 0:56:21.680
<v Speaker 3>So I think it's important.

0:56:21.680 --> 0:56:25.440
<v Speaker 2>I'm so happy that you came like reminding, reigniting that fire,

0:56:25.640 --> 0:56:28.120
<v Speaker 2>like there was a place that that stemmed from, and

0:56:28.160 --> 0:56:30.799
<v Speaker 2>that work has to continue to happen and continue to happen,

0:56:30.920 --> 0:56:34.200
<v Speaker 2>or else you can easily fall back into old even

0:56:34.239 --> 0:56:36.320
<v Speaker 2>if it doesn't look just like it. You're being abused,

0:56:36.400 --> 0:56:38.360
<v Speaker 2>or you be allowing some inneverbally abused you, or you

0:56:38.440 --> 0:56:40.440
<v Speaker 2>being so miserable you look ugly, but.

0:56:42.560 --> 0:56:43.560
<v Speaker 4>You were speaking for both of them.

0:56:43.640 --> 0:56:45.000
<v Speaker 3>Yeah, I was talking.

0:56:46.560 --> 0:56:49.560
<v Speaker 2>It's still it's still always lingering, and you have to

0:56:49.600 --> 0:56:53.040
<v Speaker 2>constantly be evaluating the people you keep and why.

0:56:53.480 --> 0:56:56.000
<v Speaker 4>Absolutely, thank you so much. I needed.

0:56:56.040 --> 0:56:58.480
<v Speaker 2>I needed to hear all your information today and definitely

0:56:58.480 --> 0:57:01.359
<v Speaker 2>that crazy ass story about that crazy ass nigga. Don't

0:57:01.440 --> 0:57:04.399
<v Speaker 2>answer dms from niggas from Junior High, don't do it, don't.

0:57:04.760 --> 0:57:07.000
<v Speaker 1>I was going back to read my HR message and

0:57:07.000 --> 0:57:09.040
<v Speaker 1>it was not as direct as that. I was like, wow,

0:57:09.040 --> 0:57:10.560
<v Speaker 1>I really could have fine tuned this more.

0:57:10.640 --> 0:57:13.640
<v Speaker 4>It was not as actually love crafting those messages.

0:57:14.280 --> 0:57:17.040
<v Speaker 1>It sounded like if you took joy in that, and

0:57:17.120 --> 0:57:19.440
<v Speaker 1>can tell I'm sure everywhere was spelled correctly.

0:57:19.760 --> 0:57:22.760
<v Speaker 4>Yes it was my and my you know, like I'm

0:57:22.760 --> 0:57:24.760
<v Speaker 4>a thing for words, But it's not just I don't

0:57:24.760 --> 0:57:25.240
<v Speaker 4>take joy in.

0:57:25.200 --> 0:57:27.800
<v Speaker 3>It joy, but but you do take joy and setting.

0:57:27.520 --> 0:57:30.800
<v Speaker 4>Your boundary and also being a good person about it.

0:57:30.840 --> 0:57:32.400
<v Speaker 4>Because I could do I could do like all these

0:57:32.440 --> 0:57:34.560
<v Speaker 4>other bitches I heard like, I could I could block

0:57:34.640 --> 0:57:36.120
<v Speaker 4>you I could take your money.

0:57:36.160 --> 0:57:37.480
<v Speaker 3>I could do all of that, but you could pick

0:57:37.520 --> 0:57:38.400
<v Speaker 3>up that four thousand dollars.

0:57:38.480 --> 0:57:41.360
<v Speaker 4>I could have picked up that kish But like I

0:57:41.400 --> 0:57:44.680
<v Speaker 4>was like, again, every day, when you're faced with these things,

0:57:44.720 --> 0:57:47.560
<v Speaker 4>this is the opportunity for you to say who you

0:57:47.600 --> 0:57:49.920
<v Speaker 4>are and show up as that. And so I'm like,

0:57:50.000 --> 0:57:52.680
<v Speaker 4>I am a good human I have boundaries. I respect

0:57:52.720 --> 0:57:55.760
<v Speaker 4>other people's boundaries, and I respect other people's humanity. Clearly,

0:57:55.880 --> 0:57:59.000
<v Speaker 4>this nigga is in way over his head with me, right,

0:57:59.280 --> 0:58:01.120
<v Speaker 4>and I called it. I was like, Nah, you could

0:58:01.120 --> 0:58:04.400
<v Speaker 4>just sniff the pussy, not you. You can't see.

0:58:06.200 --> 0:58:08.440
<v Speaker 3>He slapped the goddamn driver.

0:58:08.640 --> 0:58:11.439
<v Speaker 4>He has zero motherfucking boundaries.

0:58:13.040 --> 0:58:14.320
<v Speaker 3>The driver beat his ass.

0:58:14.920 --> 0:58:17.560
<v Speaker 4>Driver react with the no, the driver just took it.

0:58:17.680 --> 0:58:20.080
<v Speaker 3>Oh my god, poor baby. That was not the first time.

0:58:20.240 --> 0:58:24.560
<v Speaker 4>I don't think so oh no, but him. It's also

0:58:24.720 --> 0:58:27.680
<v Speaker 4>it's also like I want to learn, right, and there

0:58:27.680 --> 0:58:29.800
<v Speaker 4>are things that I learned from that, right, we learned

0:58:29.840 --> 0:58:32.000
<v Speaker 4>from every interaction I learned. I do like it when

0:58:32.000 --> 0:58:34.000
<v Speaker 4>somebody's driver picks me up, just not when they slapped

0:58:34.000 --> 0:58:37.400
<v Speaker 4>the driver, right. I do like when someone is very

0:58:37.560 --> 0:58:40.440
<v Speaker 4>attentive and you know, those sort of things. But not

0:58:40.520 --> 0:58:43.560
<v Speaker 4>when they're possessive, and so you learn something from every

0:58:43.600 --> 0:58:46.880
<v Speaker 4>single interaction. And that's why everyone is like, it's all good,

0:58:47.240 --> 0:58:49.120
<v Speaker 4>you know there there I have no no, no heart

0:58:49.160 --> 0:58:52.160
<v Speaker 4>feelings or anything. But it's also like I have a model.

0:58:52.280 --> 0:58:55.760
<v Speaker 4>I leave everything better than I found it, even crazy niggas,

0:58:55.840 --> 0:58:57.800
<v Speaker 4>I will still leave you better than I found you.

0:58:58.160 --> 0:59:00.880
<v Speaker 4>And I want you to know that, like your behavior

0:59:01.240 --> 0:59:04.680
<v Speaker 4>will chase away the woman of your dreams, and so

0:59:04.960 --> 0:59:07.680
<v Speaker 4>to be able to do that and get your words

0:59:07.720 --> 0:59:09.840
<v Speaker 4>across so that they hear the words. Because I used

0:59:09.840 --> 0:59:12.160
<v Speaker 4>to be very angry, very screaming, and then people like,

0:59:12.200 --> 0:59:14.280
<v Speaker 4>don't talk to me like that. You're yelling, and I'm like,

0:59:14.360 --> 0:59:17.080
<v Speaker 4>but you're not listening. And so I've learned that if

0:59:17.120 --> 0:59:21.000
<v Speaker 4>I can maintain my composure and take the anger, because

0:59:21.000 --> 0:59:23.360
<v Speaker 4>anger is not even a real emotions, it's an emotion

0:59:23.440 --> 0:59:27.440
<v Speaker 4>that hides fear or jealousy or anguish. If I can

0:59:27.440 --> 0:59:30.000
<v Speaker 4>take the emotion out and just put it on the table,

0:59:30.520 --> 0:59:32.720
<v Speaker 4>I've been authentic to who I am. And if you

0:59:32.800 --> 0:59:35.840
<v Speaker 4>are open to learning, you just learn acting crazy go

0:59:35.840 --> 0:59:36.680
<v Speaker 4>and lose a real bad.

0:59:36.560 --> 0:59:39.080
<v Speaker 3>Bitch fast fast.

0:59:39.320 --> 0:59:45.440
<v Speaker 4>Right. So yeah, it's boundaries, it's not easy. It's not easy,

0:59:45.440 --> 0:59:47.360
<v Speaker 4>and if I can take two seconds. One of my

0:59:47.480 --> 0:59:50.320
<v Speaker 4>biggest pieces of advice for people who are starting who

0:59:50.360 --> 0:59:52.400
<v Speaker 4>can't say no, I said, I teach the yes and

0:59:52.920 --> 0:59:53.480
<v Speaker 4>have you guys.

0:59:53.360 --> 0:59:55.720
<v Speaker 3>Ever heard of the yes and yes? And I will

0:59:55.760 --> 0:59:57.800
<v Speaker 3>do this for you.

0:59:57.480 --> 1:00:01.600
<v Speaker 4>Right like you set the parameter, you know, like can

1:00:01.680 --> 1:00:05.520
<v Speaker 4>I borrow your car? Yes? And you will need to

1:00:05.520 --> 1:00:07.760
<v Speaker 4>pay my car note for six months. And people be like,

1:00:07.920 --> 1:00:09.600
<v Speaker 4>well I only need to borrow your car for twenty minutes.

1:00:09.640 --> 1:00:12.000
<v Speaker 3>Okay, Well I guess you don't need it.

1:00:12.120 --> 1:00:14.080
<v Speaker 4>I guess you don't need it. Like it's low key

1:00:14.120 --> 1:00:15.560
<v Speaker 4>game of like how bad do you want it? But

1:00:15.600 --> 1:00:18.840
<v Speaker 4>it's it's it's boundary setting for beginners. It's saying like,

1:00:19.480 --> 1:00:22.560
<v Speaker 4>I don't want to be displeased, but let me tell

1:00:22.600 --> 1:00:26.520
<v Speaker 4>you at what level I will be comfortable with you

1:00:26.640 --> 1:00:29.160
<v Speaker 4>using me in the way that you want to use me? Yes,

1:00:29.280 --> 1:00:29.520
<v Speaker 4>you can?

1:00:30.120 --> 1:00:32.360
<v Speaker 1>Why Because this is what it's gonna calls people who

1:00:32.360 --> 1:00:35.640
<v Speaker 1>don't have problems setting boundaries yes as part of it's

1:00:35.760 --> 1:00:39.280
<v Speaker 1>just part of their every day intuitive dialogue.

1:00:39.400 --> 1:00:42.720
<v Speaker 3>So the and is where? But that and is? It's

1:00:42.800 --> 1:00:46.040
<v Speaker 3>hard even then even with the yes, if you're scared,

1:00:46.160 --> 1:00:49.360
<v Speaker 3>like yes, and can you pay my car? Not for right?

1:00:49.560 --> 1:00:51.760
<v Speaker 4>Right, And so when I when I'm coaching my people,

1:00:51.840 --> 1:00:54.080
<v Speaker 4>I'm like, and after you say your and bitch, don't

1:00:54.120 --> 1:00:57.600
<v Speaker 4>say shit, ain't nothe necessary, don't explain nothing, nothing to explain.

1:00:57.720 --> 1:00:59.920
<v Speaker 4>And and that's another one my ratchet affirmations. Noah is

1:00:59.920 --> 1:01:03.600
<v Speaker 4>a full last motherfucking sentence. But yes, yes you can

1:01:04.000 --> 1:01:06.800
<v Speaker 4>do this right. And when it comes to like dating,

1:01:06.880 --> 1:01:09.080
<v Speaker 4>and guys typically wanting to be able to date other women,

1:01:09.120 --> 1:01:10.480
<v Speaker 4>but they don't want the women to do that, and

1:01:10.520 --> 1:01:12.240
<v Speaker 4>I'm very quick to be like, yes, you can fuck

1:01:12.280 --> 1:01:19.160
<v Speaker 4>other bitches and I will too. The paulse nothing else

1:01:19.200 --> 1:01:21.880
<v Speaker 4>to say, and then they can make that decision. But

1:01:21.920 --> 1:01:24.280
<v Speaker 4>when you make that and what feels good for you,

1:01:24.360 --> 1:01:26.479
<v Speaker 4>and I do it in business, yes I can teach

1:01:26.520 --> 1:01:29.640
<v Speaker 4>this class and even when you know, I'm so excited

1:01:29.680 --> 1:01:31.560
<v Speaker 4>to be here, but I also have a life. Yes

1:01:31.600 --> 1:01:34.320
<v Speaker 4>I can come, and these are the times that I'm available.

1:01:34.480 --> 1:01:36.960
<v Speaker 4>So that way, when I walk away from this, I

1:01:37.000 --> 1:01:39.520
<v Speaker 4>feel invigorated, I feel excited, and I don't feel like

1:01:39.560 --> 1:01:42.840
<v Speaker 4>anyone took something from me that I wasn't giving. Yes,

1:01:43.080 --> 1:01:46.680
<v Speaker 4>you can have what you want and this is the price.

1:01:46.720 --> 1:01:49.840
<v Speaker 4>And most of the time, you realize that people make

1:01:49.880 --> 1:01:51.560
<v Speaker 4>you feel like you were their last resort. And here

1:01:51.560 --> 1:01:53.920
<v Speaker 4>comes another ratch of affirmation. You were not that suckers

1:01:54.000 --> 1:01:56.800
<v Speaker 4>last resort. You were only the most convenient one. Make

1:01:56.840 --> 1:01:58.480
<v Speaker 4>it not so convenient to use the fuck out of

1:01:58.520 --> 1:02:00.800
<v Speaker 4>you as No, but.

1:02:00.920 --> 1:02:02.800
<v Speaker 3>I needed all of those but thank you.

1:02:02.720 --> 1:02:03.000
<v Speaker 4>You know.

1:02:05.320 --> 1:02:07.720
<v Speaker 2>I would pass. You have all my money, all the

1:02:07.760 --> 1:02:09.240
<v Speaker 2>cash I got, you got memo.

1:02:11.680 --> 1:02:12.680
<v Speaker 3>Oh my gosh.

1:02:12.760 --> 1:02:16.160
<v Speaker 1>Okay, Well, we usually end our episodes with our guests

1:02:16.320 --> 1:02:17.360
<v Speaker 1>in a horri.

1:02:17.680 --> 1:02:19.760
<v Speaker 3>And I feel like that ship was the horror.

1:02:19.760 --> 1:02:21.040
<v Speaker 4>I mean I gave that was the horror.

1:02:25.400 --> 1:02:27.120
<v Speaker 1>I just feel like you are a plethora of story,

1:02:27.240 --> 1:02:29.920
<v Speaker 1>so I'm going to drain all of you.

1:02:30.640 --> 1:02:36.080
<v Speaker 2>Yes, yes, we want more, well do you? But Jamila,

1:02:36.160 --> 1:02:38.760
<v Speaker 2>you said you have a horri Why the fuck do

1:02:38.760 --> 1:02:41.520
<v Speaker 2>you remember my my common volunteered.

1:02:41.760 --> 1:02:43.080
<v Speaker 3>It's a quick one, so it'll be quick.

1:02:47.360 --> 1:02:48.800
<v Speaker 4>Who stories.

1:02:49.800 --> 1:02:53.680
<v Speaker 2>I was on Priman, which is a popular hiking mountain

1:02:53.840 --> 1:02:56.160
<v Speaker 2>here in l A. And I was with the guy

1:02:56.280 --> 1:02:57.720
<v Speaker 2>and we went on I was like going on the back,

1:02:57.960 --> 1:03:01.040
<v Speaker 2>the back trail because I'm from LA.

1:03:00.960 --> 1:03:03.800
<v Speaker 3>I know the back trail. And then we were like buy.

1:03:03.680 --> 1:03:05.080
<v Speaker 2>A tree, and I was like, you want to eat

1:03:05.120 --> 1:03:09.400
<v Speaker 2>my pussy and he's like, okay, so you got to ask.

1:03:10.080 --> 1:03:11.640
<v Speaker 2>And then he just sat me up on a very

1:03:11.680 --> 1:03:14.760
<v Speaker 2>convenient tree and I just scooted my biker shorts down

1:03:15.040 --> 1:03:17.720
<v Speaker 2>at my pussy a. I was like looking at looking

1:03:17.720 --> 1:03:20.040
<v Speaker 2>at the view, and I was like trying to Matt

1:03:20.080 --> 1:03:21.480
<v Speaker 2>like I was feeling good. I was trying to like

1:03:21.520 --> 1:03:23.280
<v Speaker 2>manifest a house in the hills, but I was getting

1:03:23.280 --> 1:03:25.040
<v Speaker 2>a pissya and it was great. And then I was like,

1:03:25.080 --> 1:03:27.200
<v Speaker 2>this is so nice. I love asking for what I want.

1:03:28.200 --> 1:03:29.760
<v Speaker 2>And then I got down and as soon as I

1:03:29.760 --> 1:03:31.600
<v Speaker 2>put my pants up, a guy walked by and I

1:03:31.640 --> 1:03:32.680
<v Speaker 2>was like, look at God.

1:03:33.680 --> 1:03:35.880
<v Speaker 3>And that's it. That was That was the story.

1:03:36.400 --> 1:03:40.080
<v Speaker 2>Asked for what you want, even if it's getting ahead. Yeah,

1:03:40.760 --> 1:03:42.440
<v Speaker 2>I hate that word if it's used towards me. But

1:03:42.480 --> 1:03:46.880
<v Speaker 2>he was obedient, right, So good.

1:03:46.720 --> 1:03:47.080
<v Speaker 4>Thank you?

1:03:48.280 --> 1:03:49.439
<v Speaker 3>Yeah that's what I did.

1:03:49.800 --> 1:03:50.640
<v Speaker 4>Thank you for sharing.

1:03:51.120 --> 1:03:54.960
<v Speaker 2>You're welcome. So you want to tell all of our

1:03:55.000 --> 1:03:58.120
<v Speaker 2>listeners where they can find all this amazingness.

1:03:57.560 --> 1:03:59.960
<v Speaker 4>Yeah, well they won't find these kind of stories. Pay

1:04:00.160 --> 1:04:02.440
<v Speaker 4>I typically stay away from relationships. I think I've been

1:04:02.480 --> 1:04:03.440
<v Speaker 4>holding this for.

1:04:04.080 --> 1:04:06.200
<v Speaker 3>I'm so grateful we got the exclusive drop y'all.

1:04:06.480 --> 1:04:08.080
<v Speaker 4>Y'all have heard you said you heard a lot of podcasts.

1:04:08.080 --> 1:04:10.880
<v Speaker 4>You've never heard any of these things. No, the energy

1:04:10.920 --> 1:04:12.760
<v Speaker 4>in this room, I'm like, let me just tell my

1:04:12.800 --> 1:04:13.720
<v Speaker 4>hotels to my roof.

1:04:14.240 --> 1:04:15.840
<v Speaker 2>Can we put this can be on a group chat

1:04:15.880 --> 1:04:17.680
<v Speaker 2>because now I need to know all of your ship.

1:04:20.240 --> 1:04:24.360
<v Speaker 4>Last night when but yes, thank you so much. I

1:04:24.400 --> 1:04:26.840
<v Speaker 4>can be found on Instagram as trap yoga bay that's

1:04:26.920 --> 1:04:29.640
<v Speaker 4>t R A P y O G A B A

1:04:29.840 --> 1:04:33.480
<v Speaker 4>E and really on all platforms that way. And if

1:04:33.520 --> 1:04:37.240
<v Speaker 4>you get confused, like google me bitch. And if you

1:04:37.240 --> 1:04:40.240
<v Speaker 4>guys are in La, make sure you come to her

1:04:40.640 --> 1:04:43.800
<v Speaker 4>class on October nineteenth through the twenty third, and then

1:04:43.840 --> 1:04:47.320
<v Speaker 4>I'll be in Philadelphia on the eleven through the six

1:04:47.600 --> 1:04:50.760
<v Speaker 4>of November. And if you so happened to be in Cali,

1:04:50.840 --> 1:04:53.560
<v Speaker 4>Colombia or Cabo, hit me up because I'll be teaching

1:04:53.600 --> 1:04:54.760
<v Speaker 4>at some private events there.

1:04:54.800 --> 1:04:58.040
<v Speaker 3>But I can always Oh wait, Colombia. Do I need

1:04:58.080 --> 1:04:58.800
<v Speaker 3>to go to Colombia?

1:04:58.880 --> 1:04:59.439
<v Speaker 4>Yes you do?

1:04:59.520 --> 1:05:02.960
<v Speaker 2>She I want to go to Columbia for a variety

1:05:03.000 --> 1:05:06.000
<v Speaker 2>of ratchet and wellness reasons.

1:05:05.880 --> 1:05:08.160
<v Speaker 4>Like, honestly, I should just start traveling with y'all, because honestly,

1:05:08.160 --> 1:05:10.200
<v Speaker 4>I have not learned my lesson about important dick. I

1:05:10.240 --> 1:05:12.000
<v Speaker 4>still do not. You know what.

1:05:12.280 --> 1:05:14.960
<v Speaker 2>Everywhere I go still Erica has taught me bring a

1:05:15.080 --> 1:05:18.320
<v Speaker 2>vibrator like travel essentials, bring a vibrator.

1:05:18.360 --> 1:05:21.360
<v Speaker 4>Even if even if you never hooked up overseas, what

1:05:21.480 --> 1:05:24.200
<v Speaker 4>you'd just be bringing them in. Yeah, we didn't learn

1:05:24.200 --> 1:05:28.160
<v Speaker 4>your lesson from rotating never hood bit. I've never hooked

1:05:28.160 --> 1:05:30.560
<v Speaker 4>that I'm going to empower you. I've always just.

1:05:30.680 --> 1:05:32.120
<v Speaker 3>Tried some foreign dick.

1:05:32.440 --> 1:05:34.600
<v Speaker 4>It is because my best friend said, thorn dick, don't.

1:05:34.400 --> 1:05:37.240
<v Speaker 2>Count it, don't it does out of state lines.

1:05:37.360 --> 1:05:39.840
<v Speaker 4>Thorn dick might make you stay in the foreign country

1:05:39.840 --> 1:05:43.280
<v Speaker 4>that you're at being gonea like fuck y'all a.

1:05:43.320 --> 1:05:44.200
<v Speaker 3>Prince far.

1:05:47.960 --> 1:05:52.480
<v Speaker 2>Also speaking of going on trips and finding yourself, we

1:05:52.720 --> 1:05:58.120
<v Speaker 2>are doing our retreat in Costa Rica, and by the

1:05:58.120 --> 1:06:00.320
<v Speaker 2>time this comes out, we will have put out the

1:06:00.360 --> 1:06:04.880
<v Speaker 2>first round of people who we've invited to come. So

1:06:05.760 --> 1:06:08.280
<v Speaker 2>be sure to look out for that email and put

1:06:08.320 --> 1:06:10.959
<v Speaker 2>your money's in to reserve your spot, because we would

1:06:11.000 --> 1:06:13.760
<v Speaker 2>love to grow and get well with you on the

1:06:13.800 --> 1:06:16.760
<v Speaker 2>coast of Caribbean, Costa Rica.

1:06:16.960 --> 1:06:18.920
<v Speaker 4>Maybe a little trap yoga and I'll promise I won't

1:06:18.920 --> 1:06:19.480
<v Speaker 4>bring them dick.

1:06:19.720 --> 1:06:21.640
<v Speaker 2>Oh there's all women, so you can't bring dick, but

1:06:21.640 --> 1:06:22.360
<v Speaker 2>we do encourage you.

1:06:22.920 --> 1:06:26.160
<v Speaker 3>Ton't find the locals, there's the local dick I found some.

1:06:26.920 --> 1:06:30.720
<v Speaker 4>Leave it to Erica scavenger hunt I found.

1:06:30.720 --> 1:06:33.120
<v Speaker 2>What if we tell our community, like, invite your nick

1:06:33.160 --> 1:06:34.200
<v Speaker 2>us to Coasta Rica during this time.

1:06:34.200 --> 1:06:35.680
<v Speaker 3>You can only see them during these days.

1:06:38.280 --> 1:06:41.120
<v Speaker 4>No, there's plenty of dick on.

1:06:43.160 --> 1:06:45.880
<v Speaker 2>Please please come with us trap yoga bay I know,

1:06:45.920 --> 1:06:47.000
<v Speaker 2>Oh my god, it'll be so fun.

1:06:47.080 --> 1:06:49.440
<v Speaker 1>Love to But you guys know where to find us.

1:06:49.480 --> 1:06:51.640
<v Speaker 1>Good Mom's Bad Choices on all platforms. Make sure you

1:06:51.680 --> 1:06:54.280
<v Speaker 1>follow us on Instagram at Good Mom's Underscore Bad Choices.

1:06:55.000 --> 1:06:56.240
<v Speaker 3>Check out our Patreon.

1:06:56.400 --> 1:06:58.600
<v Speaker 4>I've been like uploading little blog posts up there because

1:06:58.600 --> 1:07:00.440
<v Speaker 4>I've been in my fields all week. So I've been

1:07:00.440 --> 1:07:03.600
<v Speaker 4>like crying on Patreon. So you know, gosh with your

1:07:03.600 --> 1:07:06.400
<v Speaker 4>girls in love on Patreon. That's patreon dot com. Backslash

1:07:06.440 --> 1:07:10.080
<v Speaker 4>Good Mom's Bad Choices and have a good day.

1:07:10.080 --> 1:07:21.960
<v Speaker 3>Bye bye