WEBVTT - All opposed should offer ideas

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<v Speaker 1>Welcome to Before Breakfast, a production of iHeartRadio. Good Morning.

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<v Speaker 1>This is Laura, Welcome to the Before Breakfast podcast. Today's

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<v Speaker 1>tip is that if you don't like a plan others

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<v Speaker 1>have developed, you have a responsibility to offer a reasonable alternative.

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<v Speaker 1>You can also set that as an expectation when others

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<v Speaker 1>offer feedback. That is the difference between complaining and being constructive.

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<v Speaker 1>These days, we take it for granted that getting feedback

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<v Speaker 1>is a good thing and that hearing multiple viewpoints helps

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<v Speaker 1>us make better decisions. Often that is true, two heads

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<v Speaker 1>can be better than one, and so forth. But there

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<v Speaker 1>is a difference between constructive feedback and complaining, and unfortunately,

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<v Speaker 1>the latter is quite common, even in situations where the

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<v Speaker 1>plans have involved a lot of work. I am sure

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<v Speaker 1>you have experienced this. Your team labors for weeks to

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<v Speaker 1>draw up programming for your office retreat, and then someone

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<v Speaker 1>spends the whole time complaining that the food was better

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<v Speaker 1>two years ago when it was catered by a restaurant

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<v Speaker 1>that has since gone out of business, and so wasn't

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<v Speaker 1>an option this time around. Anyway, If your neighborhood association

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<v Speaker 1>planned a neighborhood cookout for July fourth, instead of the

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<v Speaker 1>usual Fourth of July bicycle parade. Because your township made

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<v Speaker 1>it a lot harder to get a permit to close roads.

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<v Speaker 1>You will, no doubt here complaints from families who wanted

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<v Speaker 1>to do things the way the neighborhood has always done it,

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<v Speaker 1>even if that was impossible municipal bureaucracy. Even in our

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<v Speaker 1>own homes, plans developed by one family member may be

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<v Speaker 1>critiqued by another. If you propose going to the amusement park,

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<v Speaker 1>a proposal that seems like a surefire winner, you may

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<v Speaker 1>get gripes from your kids that they never get to

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<v Speaker 1>go on the fun rides because the little siblings are

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<v Speaker 1>too short for them, or that the nearby park is

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<v Speaker 1>boring and they want to go to one that's a

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<v Speaker 1>three hour drive away, and so forth. But whatever the context,

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<v Speaker 1>when someone has done a lot of research and spend

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<v Speaker 1>a lot of time and effort pulling something together, it

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<v Speaker 1>is not fair to simply oppose the idea. Anyone objecting

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<v Speaker 1>has a responsibility to suggest something reasonable that they would

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<v Speaker 1>be in favor of. Feedback is fine, but we need

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<v Speaker 1>to be constructive, not negative. If an activity gets mixed

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<v Speaker 1>reactions from your kids, you could suggest everyone come up

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<v Speaker 1>with three ideas that they would be excited about and

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<v Speaker 1>see where there's overlap. Maybe there will be. We can

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<v Speaker 1>hope those people objecting to the fourth of July cookout

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<v Speaker 1>they definitely need to take on a leadership role in

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<v Speaker 1>the neighborhood association so they can share their great ideas

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<v Speaker 1>and also put in the sweat equity necessary to plan

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<v Speaker 1>next year and at work. If people have ideas for

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<v Speaker 1>improving things, they definitely should be part of the appropriate

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<v Speaker 1>planning groups and they may take you up on that offer,

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<v Speaker 1>and they will call ten area restaurants next time to

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<v Speaker 1>get bids on the catering and see if they can

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<v Speaker 1>do better, and they might try to get out of it.

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<v Speaker 1>But at least when it is explained what is involved,

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<v Speaker 1>people have a chance to appreciate the work that goes

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<v Speaker 1>into planning and decisions, even if they do still pout

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<v Speaker 1>about it. I am not saying that ideas shouldn't be

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<v Speaker 1>critiqued and that feedback isn't helpful. I am just saying

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<v Speaker 1>that when someone is critiquing, they should be asked to

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<v Speaker 1>offer practical ideas on what can be done differently, rather

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<v Speaker 1>than just complaining or as someone once put it all

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<v Speaker 1>in favor, say I all opposed can serve on the

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<v Speaker 1>committee next time. In the meantime, this is Laura. Thanks

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<v Speaker 1>for listening, and here's to making the most of our time. Hey, everybody,

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<v Speaker 1>I'd love to hear from you. You can send me

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<v Speaker 1>your tips, your questions, or anything else. Just connect with

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<v Speaker 1>me on Twitter, Facebook and Instagram at Before Breakfast Pod.

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<v Speaker 1>That's b E the number four then Breakfast pod. You

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<v Speaker 1>can also shoot me an email at Before Breakfast Podcasts

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<v Speaker 1>at iHeartMedia dot com. That Before Breakfast is spelled out

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<v Speaker 1>with all the letters. Thanks so much. Should I look

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<v Speaker 1>forward to staying in touch. Before Breakfast is a production

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<v Speaker 1>of iHeartRadio. For more podcasts from iHeartRadio, visit the iHeartRadio app,

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<v Speaker 1>Apple Podcasts, or wherever you listen to your favorite shows.