1 00:00:03,480 --> 00:00:09,440 Speaker 1: Welcome to Before Breakfast, a production of iHeartRadio. Good Morning. 2 00:00:10,960 --> 00:00:17,080 Speaker 1: This is Laura, Welcome to the Before Breakfast podcast. Today's 3 00:00:17,120 --> 00:00:20,560 Speaker 1: tip is that if you don't like a plan others 4 00:00:20,600 --> 00:00:26,560 Speaker 1: have developed, you have a responsibility to offer a reasonable alternative. 5 00:00:28,000 --> 00:00:32,040 Speaker 1: You can also set that as an expectation when others 6 00:00:32,640 --> 00:00:40,440 Speaker 1: offer feedback. That is the difference between complaining and being constructive. 7 00:00:43,000 --> 00:00:45,960 Speaker 1: These days, we take it for granted that getting feedback 8 00:00:46,040 --> 00:00:50,080 Speaker 1: is a good thing and that hearing multiple viewpoints helps 9 00:00:50,159 --> 00:00:56,600 Speaker 1: us make better decisions. Often that is true, two heads 10 00:00:56,640 --> 00:01:00,840 Speaker 1: can be better than one, and so forth. But there 11 00:01:00,880 --> 00:01:07,600 Speaker 1: is a difference between constructive feedback and complaining, and unfortunately, 12 00:01:07,800 --> 00:01:12,280 Speaker 1: the latter is quite common, even in situations where the 13 00:01:12,319 --> 00:01:16,759 Speaker 1: plans have involved a lot of work. I am sure 14 00:01:16,840 --> 00:01:21,399 Speaker 1: you have experienced this. Your team labors for weeks to 15 00:01:21,480 --> 00:01:25,440 Speaker 1: draw up programming for your office retreat, and then someone 16 00:01:25,520 --> 00:01:28,800 Speaker 1: spends the whole time complaining that the food was better 17 00:01:28,840 --> 00:01:32,120 Speaker 1: two years ago when it was catered by a restaurant 18 00:01:32,120 --> 00:01:35,200 Speaker 1: that has since gone out of business, and so wasn't 19 00:01:35,200 --> 00:01:40,120 Speaker 1: an option this time around. Anyway, If your neighborhood association 20 00:01:40,319 --> 00:01:43,840 Speaker 1: planned a neighborhood cookout for July fourth, instead of the 21 00:01:43,920 --> 00:01:48,040 Speaker 1: usual Fourth of July bicycle parade. Because your township made 22 00:01:48,080 --> 00:01:50,520 Speaker 1: it a lot harder to get a permit to close roads. 23 00:01:51,360 --> 00:01:54,080 Speaker 1: You will, no doubt here complaints from families who wanted 24 00:01:54,120 --> 00:01:56,960 Speaker 1: to do things the way the neighborhood has always done it, 25 00:01:57,920 --> 00:02:03,600 Speaker 1: even if that was impossible municipal bureaucracy. Even in our 26 00:02:03,640 --> 00:02:07,280 Speaker 1: own homes, plans developed by one family member may be 27 00:02:07,360 --> 00:02:12,120 Speaker 1: critiqued by another. If you propose going to the amusement park, 28 00:02:12,680 --> 00:02:16,600 Speaker 1: a proposal that seems like a surefire winner, you may 29 00:02:16,639 --> 00:02:19,280 Speaker 1: get gripes from your kids that they never get to 30 00:02:19,280 --> 00:02:21,840 Speaker 1: go on the fun rides because the little siblings are 31 00:02:21,880 --> 00:02:24,600 Speaker 1: too short for them, or that the nearby park is 32 00:02:24,639 --> 00:02:27,200 Speaker 1: boring and they want to go to one that's a 33 00:02:27,200 --> 00:02:32,799 Speaker 1: three hour drive away, and so forth. But whatever the context, 34 00:02:32,840 --> 00:02:35,960 Speaker 1: when someone has done a lot of research and spend 35 00:02:36,040 --> 00:02:39,560 Speaker 1: a lot of time and effort pulling something together, it 36 00:02:39,639 --> 00:02:45,560 Speaker 1: is not fair to simply oppose the idea. Anyone objecting 37 00:02:46,400 --> 00:02:51,160 Speaker 1: has a responsibility to suggest something reasonable that they would 38 00:02:51,160 --> 00:02:55,520 Speaker 1: be in favor of. Feedback is fine, but we need 39 00:02:55,560 --> 00:03:01,520 Speaker 1: to be constructive, not negative. If an activity gets mixed 40 00:03:01,560 --> 00:03:05,880 Speaker 1: reactions from your kids, you could suggest everyone come up 41 00:03:05,919 --> 00:03:09,640 Speaker 1: with three ideas that they would be excited about and 42 00:03:09,720 --> 00:03:13,960 Speaker 1: see where there's overlap. Maybe there will be. We can 43 00:03:14,000 --> 00:03:18,000 Speaker 1: hope those people objecting to the fourth of July cookout 44 00:03:19,080 --> 00:03:21,799 Speaker 1: they definitely need to take on a leadership role in 45 00:03:21,840 --> 00:03:25,680 Speaker 1: the neighborhood association so they can share their great ideas 46 00:03:26,680 --> 00:03:29,720 Speaker 1: and also put in the sweat equity necessary to plan 47 00:03:30,280 --> 00:03:34,800 Speaker 1: next year and at work. If people have ideas for 48 00:03:34,960 --> 00:03:39,120 Speaker 1: improving things, they definitely should be part of the appropriate 49 00:03:39,120 --> 00:03:42,800 Speaker 1: planning groups and they may take you up on that offer, 50 00:03:43,480 --> 00:03:46,920 Speaker 1: and they will call ten area restaurants next time to 51 00:03:46,960 --> 00:03:48,800 Speaker 1: get bids on the catering and see if they can 52 00:03:48,800 --> 00:03:52,600 Speaker 1: do better, and they might try to get out of it. 53 00:03:53,880 --> 00:03:56,640 Speaker 1: But at least when it is explained what is involved, 54 00:03:57,520 --> 00:04:01,360 Speaker 1: people have a chance to appreciate the work that goes 55 00:04:01,400 --> 00:04:06,400 Speaker 1: into planning and decisions, even if they do still pout 56 00:04:06,440 --> 00:04:10,480 Speaker 1: about it. I am not saying that ideas shouldn't be 57 00:04:10,520 --> 00:04:14,640 Speaker 1: critiqued and that feedback isn't helpful. I am just saying 58 00:04:14,680 --> 00:04:18,800 Speaker 1: that when someone is critiquing, they should be asked to 59 00:04:18,880 --> 00:04:23,559 Speaker 1: offer practical ideas on what can be done differently, rather 60 00:04:24,040 --> 00:04:28,640 Speaker 1: than just complaining or as someone once put it all 61 00:04:28,680 --> 00:04:33,320 Speaker 1: in favor, say I all opposed can serve on the 62 00:04:33,320 --> 00:04:39,400 Speaker 1: committee next time. In the meantime, this is Laura. Thanks 63 00:04:39,400 --> 00:04:50,680 Speaker 1: for listening, and here's to making the most of our time. Hey, everybody, 64 00:04:50,880 --> 00:04:52,960 Speaker 1: I'd love to hear from you. You can send me 65 00:04:53,000 --> 00:04:56,640 Speaker 1: your tips, your questions, or anything else. Just connect with 66 00:04:56,680 --> 00:05:01,080 Speaker 1: me on Twitter, Facebook and Instagram at Before Breakfast Pod. 67 00:05:01,760 --> 00:05:07,039 Speaker 1: That's b E the number four then Breakfast pod. You 68 00:05:07,080 --> 00:05:10,560 Speaker 1: can also shoot me an email at Before Breakfast Podcasts 69 00:05:10,600 --> 00:05:13,960 Speaker 1: at iHeartMedia dot com. That Before Breakfast is spelled out 70 00:05:13,960 --> 00:05:16,400 Speaker 1: with all the letters. Thanks so much. Should I look 71 00:05:16,480 --> 00:05:24,760 Speaker 1: forward to staying in touch. Before Breakfast is a production 72 00:05:24,839 --> 00:05:30,200 Speaker 1: of iHeartRadio. For more podcasts from iHeartRadio, visit the iHeartRadio app, 73 00:05:30,520 --> 00:05:37,680 Speaker 1: Apple Podcasts, or wherever you listen to your favorite shows.