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Speaker 1: On this week's episode of Cultivating her Space.

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Speaker 2: And even folks who have severe mental illness, because usually

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Speaker 2: that's what we associate the word crazy with. Someone who's

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Speaker 2: experiencing severe mental illness, they still do not deserve to

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Speaker 2: be called crazy. What might be happening to them psychologically.

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Speaker 3: Is horrific, bizarre, strange, but.

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Speaker 2: They themselves are not crazy. And lady, if you are

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Speaker 2: experiencing depression, you are not crazy. There may be moments

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Speaker 2: where you feel like you are having an out of

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Speaker 2: body experience because it might be something that you're not

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Speaker 2: used to, but again, I cannot reiterate enough, you are

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Speaker 2: not crazy.

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Speaker 1: Today's episode is sure to provide you with motivation, inspiration,

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Speaker 1: or a fresh perspective. If you have any AHA moments

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Speaker 1: or appreciate anything from this episode, please leave us a

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Speaker 1: review to let us know we're on the right track. Also,

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Speaker 1: we release episodes every Friday, so be sure to subscribe

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Speaker 1: on iTunes and visit cultivatingheirspace dot com to access our

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Speaker 1: exclusive after show and other bonus content from the Patreon tab.

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Speaker 4: Welcome to Cultivating her Space, a podcast dedicated to uplifting

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Speaker 4: women like you. We're your hosts, Doctor Dominique Bussard, a

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Speaker 4: college professor and psychologist.

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Speaker 5: And Terry Lomax, a techie and motivational speaker. In a

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Speaker 5: world where black women are often misrepresented and misunderstood, please

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Speaker 5: join us as we initiate authentic conversations on everything from

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Speaker 5: five roids to fake friends and create a safe space

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Speaker 5: were black Coleman can just be.

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Speaker 6: Hey, lady, it's Terry here from the Cultivating her Space podcast.

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Speaker 6: I'm hosting a free podcasting masterclass where I'm going to

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Speaker 6: teach you how to create your impactful podcast and how

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Speaker 6: you can generate multiple streams of income. You can visit

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Speaker 6: podcast with Terry dot com to register for free. I

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Speaker 6: hope to see you.

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Speaker 2: There, lady today. Before we dive into this topic of conversation,

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Speaker 2: we do want to acknowledge that this is a very

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Speaker 2: sensitive topic and keeping that sensitivity in mind, we want

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Speaker 2: to note that we will be talking about depression, mental health,

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Speaker 2: and possibly suicide. And so, lady, if you or someone

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Speaker 2: you know is experiencing a mental health crisis or having

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Speaker 2: suicidal thoughts, we want you to know that help is available.

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Speaker 2: Feel free to call nine eight eight, and that number

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Speaker 2: is a suicipher prevention hotline and it's available to you

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Speaker 2: twenty four hours a day, seven days a week. And

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Speaker 2: now let's jump into the conversation. Our quote of the day.

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Speaker 2: On particularly rough days when I'm sure I can't possibly endure,

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Speaker 2: I like to remind myself that my track record for

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Speaker 2: getting through bad days so far is one hundred percent.

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Speaker 2: And that's pretty damn good. That quote can be found

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Speaker 2: on healthyplace dot com. So t today, we're talking about

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Speaker 2: something that a lot of us experience, depression or depressive episode.

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Speaker 2: You want to tell us, tell us more about your experience.

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Speaker 5: Yes, lady, I really appreciate that quote of the day

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Speaker 5: because I think sometimes that's literally the only motivating factor

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Speaker 5: is the fact that you know what I've been through

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Speaker 5: these rough times before I can make it out. And so, lady,

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Speaker 5: although this is going to be I would's it like

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Speaker 5: a bit of a somber, you know episode because of

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Speaker 5: the topic. You may hear us laugh and be playful

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Speaker 5: in the midst of the conversation, because that is the

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Speaker 5: type of energy that we bring to these conversations in general.

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Speaker 5: So let's got on that part of it. That's part

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Speaker 5: that's part of that. Have you ever like been crying

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Speaker 5: and then started laughing. Yeah, okay all the time, right, yes, okay,

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Speaker 5: don't get in this together, lady. But what I want

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Speaker 5: to do before we jump into the actual episode, I

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Speaker 5: want to share with you a short journal entry or

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Speaker 5: basically like a blog post that I wrote the week

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Speaker 5: that I was struggling with depression, which is actually when

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Speaker 5: I mapped out this episode. Because Domini sometimes will think

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Speaker 5: of topics that we really like or topics that relate

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Speaker 5: to something that we're going through in life, and so

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Speaker 5: we'll each either map out an episode or we'll co

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Speaker 5: create content. That's that's part of our process. So I

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Speaker 5: wrote this when I was in a very dark space

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Speaker 5: because I wanted to normalize this experience and also shed

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Speaker 5: light on what depression can look like for some people.

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Speaker 5: So let's dive into the journal entry and then I'll

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Speaker 5: let you know when the journal entry stops. So here

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Speaker 5: we go, lady. As I map out this episode, I'm

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Speaker 5: moving through a bout of what feels like depression. I've

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Speaker 5: struggled with depression ever since I was a kid. I

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Speaker 5: don't think I was aware of it at the time,

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Speaker 5: but when I revisited my journal entries as a child,

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Speaker 5: I was reminded that depression, anxiety, and suicidal ideations were

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Speaker 5: constants throughout my formative years. So today I feel like shit.

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Speaker 5: I'm under the weather, I have a stuffy nose, body aches,

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Speaker 5: and my eyes are a bit watering. I don't have COVID,

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Speaker 5: but my period is also on, so it feels like

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Speaker 5: a double up you. Yes, I have so much to

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Speaker 5: be grateful for, but today was one of those days

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Speaker 5: where I just wanted to wallow in my shit. I

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Speaker 5: don't feel like focusing on the post. I don't feel

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Speaker 5: like talking to anyone. I feel like the proverbial sky

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Speaker 5: is falling, and it's been so easy to find all

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Speaker 5: the things that are wrong with my life. On top

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Speaker 5: of that, I feel alone. Yes, I have friends, a

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Speaker 5: supportive husband, a beautiful baby, siblings who love me, a therapist,

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Speaker 5: and coaches who support me, and I still feel lonely.

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Speaker 5: When I talk to my colleagues or respond to people

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Speaker 5: on social media, I'm all smiles and fun emojis, but

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Speaker 5: it's just a front because those aren't spaces where my

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Speaker 5: real emotions can be expressed, and everyone else has their

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Speaker 5: own stuff to deal with, so I'm not interested in

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Speaker 5: being a burden or putting people unnecessarily into my business.

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Speaker 5: I don't feel motivated, Feelings of unworthiness keep creeping in,

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Speaker 5: and I've cried a few times today. This is what

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Speaker 5: depression looks like for me. End journal entry.

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Speaker 2: See thank you for sharing that. You know, as I

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Speaker 2: was listening to you read your entry, the thing that

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Speaker 2: kept coming up for me is so many people can

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Speaker 2: relate to this. Each of the various things that you

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Speaker 2: mentioned that you were experiencing or how you felt. There

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Speaker 2: are so many women out there, so many people out

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Speaker 2: there who have been in that same space that you

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Speaker 2: were in that day. So one, I want to thank

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Speaker 2: you for sharing this with us, right, letting us in,

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Speaker 2: because I'm included into that comment that you wrote that

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Speaker 2: you didn't want to share it on social media because

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Speaker 2: you didn't want to be a burden and you didn't

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Speaker 2: want people in your business, right, And so what change

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Speaker 2: for you that you wanted to share it today?

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Speaker 5: You know what's funny time? I want to make sure

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Speaker 5: I answer that question. But there are two things that

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Speaker 5: I thought of as I was reading that. When I

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Speaker 5: wrote that my I was in such a just heavy,

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Speaker 5: just heavy energy space and I'm so far removed. I

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Speaker 5: think this was about two weeks ago, and I thought

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Speaker 5: we were going to record it the next day or

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Speaker 5: something like that. And so when I was in that moment,

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Speaker 5: I was in such a different energy space. Now I'm

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Speaker 5: having a fantastic day. I had a wonderful day. I'm

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Speaker 5: so far removed from those feelings that I knew that

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Speaker 5: that would happen, because, like the quote was saying, I

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Speaker 5: had been there before and I knew it would pass,

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Speaker 5: but I had to go through it to get through.

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Speaker 5: And so I would say, for me, Dom, I usually

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Speaker 5: don't like to share things that I'm going through in

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Speaker 5: that very moment on social media because I'm still working

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Speaker 5: through it oftentimes. And also I noticed that sometimes people

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Speaker 5: they'll try to like help their quotes help and try

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Speaker 5: to provide feedback or you know, input, and it's not

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Speaker 5: very helpful at all. Or they'll come and try to

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Speaker 5: like solve your problem, and that that doesn't work well

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Speaker 5: for me, especially when they don't have context. So for me,

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Speaker 5: I was ready to share that soon after I wrote

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Speaker 5: the post because I was already feeling better. But I

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Speaker 5: think now because I don't even I don't resonate with

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Speaker 5: that version of Terry the same way that I does

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Speaker 5: that make sense, Like I don't resonate with that version

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Speaker 5: of myself because I'm in such a different space now,

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Speaker 5: but I know that that is part of the ebb

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Speaker 5: and flow that I experience going through depression and coming

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Speaker 5: out and having those ties and loads. Does that make

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Speaker 5: sense at all.

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Speaker 2: Dumb, Yeah, that does. That does. And so so thank

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Speaker 2: you for thank you for putting that out there, because

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Speaker 2: I think that's another very important point too, write that

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Speaker 2: there are ebbs and flows that and there are different

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Speaker 2: types of depression. And we have multiple other episodes where

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Speaker 2: we talk about depression and how to depression. But I

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Speaker 2: think the difference is that this particular episode, what we're

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Speaker 2: focusing on are those not the long term depression right

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Speaker 2: or necessarily identifying the general symptoms of depression, But this

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Speaker 2: episode is focusing more on what does it look like

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Speaker 2: to encounter a depressive episode or to be experiencing what

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Speaker 2: we would call either you've heard the term either low

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Speaker 2: grade depression or high functioning depression, and essentially what that

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Speaker 2: is is high functioning or low grade depression means that

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Speaker 2: it's not stopping you from accomplishing your day to day things. Right. So, Sarah,

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Speaker 2: you talked about you wanted to sit and wallow, yet

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Speaker 2: you were also talking about using like creating material for

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Speaker 2: a podcast episode that we were going to record the

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Speaker 2: next day. And my guess, if I'm also reflecting back

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Speaker 2: to a couple of weeks ago, you were also throughout

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Speaker 2: the day still handling business, yet you were feeling this way.

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Speaker 2: And so the difference for a lot of folks who

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Speaker 2: are experiencing major depression is that they are struggling to

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Speaker 2: do those day to day things. They might not be

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Speaker 2: able to get out of the bed at all for

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Speaker 2: days at a time. Someone who has high functioning or

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Speaker 2: low grade depression, or might be experiencing a depressive episode,

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Speaker 2: they are still able to get up and do the

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Speaker 2: day to day things. They are still able to, like

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Speaker 2: you said, engage on Instagram in the same way that

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Speaker 2: they normally would without anyone detecting the difference.

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Speaker 5: Yes, don that is so spot on and so important

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Speaker 5: a lady you not. This is a grown woman podcast, okay,

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Speaker 5: get to the tips, lady and like what we do

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Speaker 5: in our personal lives to help us move through the

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Speaker 5: depression that we might experience. Right, And this is not

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Speaker 5: a I'm trying to say. What I'm trying to say

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Speaker 5: is it's not one of those situations where it's going

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Speaker 5: to like fix everything or it's not going to apply

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Speaker 5: to everyone's situation. But this is That's what I was

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Speaker 5: trying to say. Thank you, Dom. It's not a cure

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Speaker 5: all for everyone. Thank you teamwork. It's not a cure

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Speaker 5: off for everyone. But it's just what we do. And

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Speaker 5: so I'm going to just sit with it for a

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Speaker 5: little bit because I feel like people don't do that

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Speaker 5: enough where it's like, do I feel low as shit?

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Speaker 5: It's so mind boggling to me, don when I think

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Speaker 5: about the human experience and how I was just so

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Speaker 5: low as I was, And I do believe that it

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Speaker 5: was hormonal for me because it was like period a

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Speaker 5: little bit of stress prepping for you know, traveling and speaking, engagement,

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Speaker 5: all those things, and then now today having a fantastic day,

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Speaker 5: us having a great conversation right before this, like everything's

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Speaker 5: amazing today. And so I try not to get too

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Speaker 5: high with the highs and not get too low with

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Speaker 5: the lows. But one of the quotes that I found

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Speaker 5: in doing this research, because mapping out the episode, Surprise

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Speaker 5: was one of my healing techniques that I used to

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Speaker 5: move through it. And so one of the quotes I

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Speaker 5: found was, there's hope even when your brain tells you

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Speaker 5: there isn't. And that's a quote by a man named

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Speaker 5: John Green. And I found that quote, and I found

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Speaker 5: that this quote really spoke to me because I realized

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Speaker 5: that sometimes our thoughts can low key betray us, especially

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Speaker 5: if you're in your head a lot like me. Right,

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Speaker 5: So I want to I'm going to be very vulnerable,

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Speaker 5: as you can say, I've already been very vulnerable in

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Speaker 5: this episode. So y'all, this is a safe space, no judgment,

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Speaker 5: all right, So I want to share some other things

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Speaker 5: that be going through my mind. But I do want

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Speaker 5: to let you know that I'm okay, I'm fantastic actually,

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Speaker 5: and I have support in my corner. What I'm sharing

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Speaker 5: is not apply for attention or help, like I'm good,

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Speaker 5: but I'm just letting you know what's going on. So, Dom,

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Speaker 5: I am a little nervous to share, but I hope

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Speaker 5: that you can either let me know whether you've either

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Speaker 5: experienced this or whether you've heard someone else talk about this.

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Speaker 5: So just because a thought comes up doesn't mean we

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Speaker 5: have to entertain it, right, Okay, So sometimes y'all, when

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Speaker 5: I'm depressed, right, I may think about suicide, but I'm

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Speaker 5: not thinking about it in a suicidal way, if that

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Speaker 5: makes sense. So for me, it's like, you know, it'll

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Speaker 5: come up in my mind. And Dom, have you ever

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Speaker 5: heard anyone sharing that that shruggles with depression? Before I

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Speaker 5: move on, I just want to check in with you

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Speaker 5: as I share.

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Speaker 2: Yes, I was going to go into a whole spiell,

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Speaker 2: but I will wait to. So what therapists or clinicians

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Speaker 2: would say is that you may be having passive suicidal ideation.

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Speaker 2: That's the clinical terminology that we would use, or existential thoughts, right,

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Speaker 2: those are some of the clinical high level terms that

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Speaker 2: we might use to describe what you were experiencing. Right,

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Speaker 2: And so what that looks like for folks who are listening,

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Speaker 2: and then Terry, you tell me how much this like

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Speaker 2: felt like, You're like what you were dealing with. What

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Speaker 2: it typically looks like is it's a fleeting thought. So

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Speaker 2: maybe it lasts for a quick second of I'm feeling

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Speaker 2: really low right now, and I wonder what it would

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Speaker 2: be like if I weren't here, or I think the

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Speaker 2: world will just be better off of just I just weren't

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Speaker 2: here right now, or I wonder if folks will admit

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Speaker 2: I wonder who would miss me if I were gone,

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Speaker 2: or I wonder what it would be like to end

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Speaker 2: all of this pain, And then the thought stops and

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Speaker 2: you move on to something else. You don't take it

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Speaker 2: any further, right, And maybe that thought comes up in

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Speaker 2: the course of your depressive episode, Maybe that thought comes

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Speaker 2: up multiple times, but it doesn't go past that. Those

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Speaker 2: type of leading suicidal existential thoughts are way more common

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Speaker 2: than people admit. All of us know at least Let's

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Speaker 2: say you know five people. Right. If you know five people,

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Speaker 2: at least three of those five people have had at

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Speaker 2: some point in life a fleeting thought of suicide.

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Speaker 5: I'm so glad you share that. Don because again, this

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Speaker 5: is the whole purpose, Lady of us having this conversation, right,

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Speaker 5: we're normalizing this. And I'm so grateful to hear that

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Speaker 5: from my friend and co host and therapists and psychologists,

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Speaker 5: because I didn't know that. I didn't know the formal terminology,

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Speaker 5: and I think what you said is fine. On So

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Speaker 5: for me, dom like, again, suicide will come up, but

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Speaker 5: I don't have a plan, right, it just kind of

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Speaker 5: pops into my mind. So you ever find yourself standing

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Speaker 5: on like a platform where the train is gonna come by,

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Speaker 5: and in your mind it's like, damn, that'd be some

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Speaker 5: wild shit if I were to jump. I'm not gonna jump,

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Speaker 5: but it's like, damn, that be some wild shit. Or

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Speaker 5: if you like, are getting something out of the garbage

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Speaker 5: disposal and the sink and you're like, damn, that'd be crazy.

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Speaker 5: That'd be bizarre. Let me use bizarre. That'd be bizarre.

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Speaker 5: If I turn on the garbage disposal, I'm not going

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Speaker 5: to do it. But it's just like you have this thought,

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Speaker 5: and so lady, as you're listening, you might be like

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Speaker 5: you Terry is tripping right, or you might be like, no, doctor,

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Speaker 5: don I'm resonating what she just shared. Right, But I

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Speaker 5: guarantee you that at least five other women that you

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Speaker 5: know have had those same thoughts of like the garbage

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Speaker 5: disposal or the train. I dare you to ask a

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Speaker 5: friend okay and DM me if one of them says, yes, girl,

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Speaker 5: that has happened to me, because I want to know. Okay,

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Speaker 5: so y'all, dea mustn't let us know. And if they

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Speaker 5: say no, I bet you somebody is they're not being

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Speaker 5: truthful because I've heard other people that had similar thoughts,

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Speaker 5: and I will say, our thoughts are not factual. And

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Speaker 5: that's something I've had to remind myself over the years,

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Speaker 5: because thoughts will come up and I thought, oh, this

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Speaker 5: popped into my mind, so it must mean that it

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Speaker 5: means something, right, or you try to attach some meaning

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Speaker 5: to it, and it's like no, at least not all

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Speaker 5: the time.

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Speaker 6: Right.

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Speaker 5: Even as I navigated my day of low energy, I

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Speaker 5: knew that it would pass, and I buckled up and

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Speaker 5: I made the most of the ride until it did pass.

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Speaker 5: And I also dug into my toolbox, which will dive

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Speaker 5: into and just a bit of the things that I

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Speaker 5: know typically help me navigate those times. Because it's not

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Speaker 5: about going around the depression or getting over it. It's

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Speaker 5: literally going through the depression. It's kind of like when

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Speaker 5: you go through a bad storm. You got to go

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Speaker 5: through the rain and through the storm to get to

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Speaker 5: the other side. And so that's my spell before we

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Speaker 5: go into how we want to hear from you, lady

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Speaker 5: and interact with you. So anything else down from this,

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Speaker 5: whether it's like your experience of how it feels for you,

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Speaker 5: like moving through your body, or even clients.

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Speaker 2: Yeah, you know, I think I appreciate that we are

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Speaker 2: normalizing this because I'm seeing it spoken about more and more. Particularly,

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Speaker 2: you know, I work on a college campus and have

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Speaker 2: and that's a question that we ask our clients on

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Speaker 2: a regular basis, right, or do you have thoughts of

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Speaker 2: farming yourself? Do you have thoughts of farming someone else? Right?

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Speaker 2: Because then we're obligated to address that, right, And I

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Speaker 2: think sometimes folks are scared to admit that, Yeah, I've

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Speaker 2: had a thought of not wanting to be here, or yeah,

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Speaker 2: I was on that train platform and had a quick

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Speaker 2: thought of like what would that be like if I

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Speaker 2: stepped off? Right? And I want to remind us that

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Speaker 2: that's not always an indication of suicide, right, that you

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Speaker 2: grew that you truly intend on taking your life, that

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Speaker 2: you don't want to be here. Sometimes it may be

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Speaker 2: an experience of curiosity. Right, of that looks it feels

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Speaker 2: like that would be incredibly incredibly painful. What must that

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Speaker 2: be like? Right? And I think the differences is in

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Speaker 2: how we know that it's something that is a fleeting

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Speaker 2: thought versus we need to stop and get help immediately.

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Speaker 2: Is if our thoughts, if that train of thought continues,

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Speaker 2: if you start feeling like you're really you feel really hopeless,

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Speaker 2: there's nothing that you have to look forward to. If

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Speaker 2: you start thinking about writing a letter to folks or

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Speaker 2: saying goodbye to people. Right, if you start actually developing

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Speaker 2: a plan on how you really want to take your life,

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Speaker 2: then we need to stop and get immediate help. Right.

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Speaker 2: I think even those fleeting thoughts are important for us

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Speaker 2: to tune into. Though, even those fleeting thoughts, we want

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Speaker 2: to pause and acknowledge them and like you said, move

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Speaker 2: through that, right, Because I also recognize that if we

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Speaker 2: don't address something, if we don't and by something, I

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Speaker 2: mean if we don't address what those thoughts are, what

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Speaker 2: the feelings are, that are coming up. If we push

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Speaker 2: them to the side, try to ignore them, or try

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Speaker 2: to avoid them because they're uncomfortable, they might go away

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Speaker 2: for a few minutes, for a few days, but eventually

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Speaker 2: it's going to come back, and it's going to keep

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Speaker 2: intensifying until we address it.

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Speaker 5: I love that, Dome. I love that you share that,

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Speaker 5: and I'm just I can't stress enough how appreciative I

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Speaker 5: am that we are having this conversation, because it really

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Speaker 5: is important, Dome. And when I think about the fleeting

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Speaker 5: thoughts that you were just mentioning, I think about my

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Speaker 5: mental state now compared to back years ago when I

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Speaker 5: when I had a plan to, you know, in my life,

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Speaker 5: and so I would say today, my fleeting thoughts typically

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Speaker 5: come up when i'm when I feel that depression sort

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Speaker 5: of cloud coming over me. But on a on a

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Speaker 5: regular my typical mood is excitement and joy for living.

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Speaker 5: I'm excited to wake up and I'm excited to be

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Speaker 5: with my daughter, and be with my husband, and be

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Speaker 5: with my friends. You know, I'm excited for life. But

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Speaker 5: I remember a time when I wasn't. I remember when

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Speaker 5: I did feel hopeful and I would pray like, oh,

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Speaker 5: I hope I die in my sleep because I was

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Speaker 5: just so miserable and I wanted to be gone. And

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Speaker 5: so even comparing the depression that I experienced now as

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Speaker 5: opposed to the depression that I had years ago, like

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Speaker 5: a decade plus ago, it's very different. And I want

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Speaker 5: to talk about don can we just talk a bit

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Speaker 5: about advice or guidance that we can give folks who

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Speaker 5: do feel that they have a plan and they are

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Speaker 5: thinking through. Okay, what it would be like for me

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Speaker 5: to write this letter, because I know when I was struggling,

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Speaker 5: there was some shame, right, there was the stigma of Okay,

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Speaker 5: it's not just that, it's beyond just finding a therapist.

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Speaker 5: Now going to someone and admitting to them that I

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Speaker 5: want in my life, like the shame that comes with that.

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Speaker 5: You know, people used to see word a lot like, oh,

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Speaker 5: I feel like am I crazy?

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Speaker 7: Right?

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Speaker 5: Like, what guidance can we give folks that are at

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Speaker 5: that set where they're like, I do need help? What now?

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Speaker 8: You know?

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Speaker 2: Program the number nine eight eight into your phone, so

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Speaker 2: that is the National Suicide Prevention Hotline, And lady, if

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Speaker 2: you're listening and you're not located in the US, I

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Speaker 2: would just encourage you to find what the number is

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Speaker 2: in your country and program it into your phone and

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Speaker 2: that way. And I want to note that this new

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Speaker 2: number is a recent change. It used to be a

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Speaker 2: longer toll free number, and just literally a couple of

432
00:25:39,640 --> 00:25:42,760
Speaker 2: months ago, they released this new number to make it

433
00:25:42,800 --> 00:25:46,919
Speaker 2: easier for folks to remember. Even as a therapist, I

434
00:25:46,920 --> 00:25:51,400
Speaker 2: would sometimes forget it was one eight hundred two seven

435
00:25:51,560 --> 00:25:53,720
Speaker 2: three talk, or maybe it was one eight eight eight.

436
00:25:53,800 --> 00:25:55,760
Speaker 2: I think it was one eight hundred, but it was

437
00:25:55,760 --> 00:25:57,879
Speaker 2: too But see, I can't even fully remember I had

438
00:25:57,880 --> 00:26:01,240
Speaker 2: a programmed in my phone, but nine to eight eight

439
00:26:01,440 --> 00:26:05,880
Speaker 2: is simple enough to remember. It's three digits, and so

440
00:26:06,880 --> 00:26:10,080
Speaker 2: I would say, program that number into your phone and

441
00:26:10,160 --> 00:26:13,639
Speaker 2: don't hesitate to use it. There's again, like I mentioned

442
00:26:13,640 --> 00:26:15,800
Speaker 2: at the top of the show, there is someone on

443
00:26:15,840 --> 00:26:20,720
Speaker 2: the other side of that line twenty four seven to

444
00:26:21,320 --> 00:26:25,600
Speaker 2: help you to talk to you and to get you

445
00:26:25,680 --> 00:26:28,320
Speaker 2: connected to the help that you might need. And the

446
00:26:28,400 --> 00:26:31,200
Speaker 2: help that you might need is gonna look different depending

447
00:26:31,240 --> 00:26:33,320
Speaker 2: on your unique circumstances.

448
00:26:35,160 --> 00:26:36,920
Speaker 5: As you said that, Dom, I'm just looking at the

449
00:26:37,040 --> 00:26:39,679
Speaker 5: number and I see that when I googled it, I

450
00:26:39,720 --> 00:26:41,880
Speaker 5: saved it into my phone. So lady, if you feel

451
00:26:41,920 --> 00:26:44,119
Speaker 5: a little a certain way about doing it. Just no,

452
00:26:44,240 --> 00:26:46,159
Speaker 5: Domini have it in our phones as well, so I

453
00:26:46,240 --> 00:26:48,520
Speaker 5: just saved it to my phone. So be in this together, y'all.

454
00:26:49,160 --> 00:26:51,320
Speaker 5: But I see that you can text it, you can chat,

455
00:26:51,400 --> 00:26:52,840
Speaker 5: you can go to the website, and you can call,

456
00:26:52,960 --> 00:26:55,320
Speaker 5: so there are options. And I have caught a hotline

457
00:26:55,320 --> 00:26:58,080
Speaker 5: be four years ago because I was by myself and

458
00:26:58,119 --> 00:27:00,520
Speaker 5: I was like, I'm struggling and I called and I

459
00:27:00,560 --> 00:27:02,280
Speaker 5: never thought that I'd be a person to call, but

460
00:27:02,359 --> 00:27:04,600
Speaker 5: I did and it helped me that day, like it

461
00:27:04,600 --> 00:27:07,359
Speaker 5: felt good to do. So, lady. We also have another

462
00:27:07,400 --> 00:27:10,439
Speaker 5: episode about suicide, if I'm not mistaken, So if you

463
00:27:10,520 --> 00:27:14,160
Speaker 5: google the word suicide with the podcast name, that should

464
00:27:14,200 --> 00:27:15,800
Speaker 5: come up for you. We don't have it, or we

465
00:27:15,840 --> 00:27:17,120
Speaker 5: can put it in the show notes as well, because

466
00:27:17,119 --> 00:27:19,760
Speaker 5: I don't have it readily accessible in my mind right now.

467
00:27:20,040 --> 00:27:21,440
Speaker 5: But one of the things that we would love for

468
00:27:21,480 --> 00:27:24,399
Speaker 5: you to do, lady, is we have posted a black

469
00:27:24,440 --> 00:27:27,840
Speaker 5: square on Instagram that says depression, and so if you

470
00:27:27,960 --> 00:27:30,480
Speaker 5: head on over to that post, please let us know

471
00:27:31,160 --> 00:27:32,879
Speaker 5: you know after we share, of course, like what your

472
00:27:32,920 --> 00:27:35,720
Speaker 5: takeaways are, what tips you want to offer if you've

473
00:27:35,760 --> 00:27:38,200
Speaker 5: ever had a thought and you were standing on the platform,

474
00:27:38,359 --> 00:27:40,440
Speaker 5: you know, waiting for a train, like, let us know

475
00:27:40,520 --> 00:27:43,560
Speaker 5: if any of that resonated with you, and also share

476
00:27:43,560 --> 00:27:45,639
Speaker 5: any words of encouragement that you would offer to someone

477
00:27:45,640 --> 00:27:47,920
Speaker 5: else that's going through. Let's kind of build a community

478
00:27:47,960 --> 00:27:49,840
Speaker 5: around that post. So you can literally go to our

479
00:27:49,880 --> 00:27:52,720
Speaker 5: Instagram at herspace podcast just scroll until you see the

480
00:27:52,760 --> 00:27:55,639
Speaker 5: black square that says depression and you'll know exactly what

481
00:27:55,720 --> 00:27:59,160
Speaker 5: to do on that particular post. So, don what should

482
00:27:59,160 --> 00:28:01,000
Speaker 5: we dive into around this topic?

483
00:28:02,000 --> 00:28:05,400
Speaker 2: Well, I think it's important to talk about some of

484
00:28:05,440 --> 00:28:11,600
Speaker 2: the misconceptions right. There are a lot of misconceptions out

485
00:28:11,640 --> 00:28:15,639
Speaker 2: there because I think that oftentimes what I see as

486
00:28:15,760 --> 00:28:20,520
Speaker 2: a clinician, and what a lot of my clinician friends

487
00:28:20,520 --> 00:28:24,679
Speaker 2: and colleagues will note, is that particularly for black women,

488
00:28:25,640 --> 00:28:33,879
Speaker 2: because we are perceived as being strong women, right, and

489
00:28:33,920 --> 00:28:38,560
Speaker 2: the expectation is that we are resilient and that we

490
00:28:38,800 --> 00:28:41,960
Speaker 2: you know, and there is that misconception out there that

491
00:28:42,080 --> 00:28:45,360
Speaker 2: we don't experience pain, right, which we know is bullshit,

492
00:28:46,480 --> 00:28:50,640
Speaker 2: But that's how people tend to treat us and how

493
00:28:50,720 --> 00:28:55,400
Speaker 2: sometimes we treat ourselves, and so I think it's important

494
00:28:55,480 --> 00:28:59,400
Speaker 2: to talk about the misconceptions about what it means to

495
00:28:59,600 --> 00:29:06,560
Speaker 2: expect experience a depressive episode or high grade depression or

496
00:29:06,640 --> 00:29:12,440
Speaker 2: I'm sorry, high functioning depression, so that we under we

497
00:29:12,480 --> 00:29:16,160
Speaker 2: can have a full understanding of how to recognize it

498
00:29:16,240 --> 00:29:20,600
Speaker 2: when we might be experiencing it or one of our

499
00:29:20,600 --> 00:29:22,080
Speaker 2: friends is experiencing it.

500
00:29:23,360 --> 00:29:27,160
Speaker 5: Yes, yes, yes, A men to all of that. I'm

501
00:29:27,160 --> 00:29:29,680
Speaker 5: going to just die right in with the first misconception,

502
00:29:30,280 --> 00:29:34,320
Speaker 5: and that's that depression or any mental struggles that you

503
00:29:34,440 --> 00:29:37,400
Speaker 5: are experiencing, they don't take away from your ability to

504
00:29:37,480 --> 00:29:40,200
Speaker 5: inspire and motivate. And that's so key for me, don

505
00:29:40,240 --> 00:29:42,280
Speaker 5: because I used to believe. You know, years ago, when

506
00:29:42,320 --> 00:29:44,920
Speaker 5: I first started my brand online, it took me a

507
00:29:44,960 --> 00:29:47,320
Speaker 5: while to post and to share because I felt like

508
00:29:47,360 --> 00:29:49,440
Speaker 5: I had to be a perfect person and I had

509
00:29:49,440 --> 00:29:51,560
Speaker 5: to be you know, this cookie cutter image. Now everyone

510
00:29:51,600 --> 00:29:56,400
Speaker 5: presents this highlight reel with no imperfections on social media

511
00:29:56,920 --> 00:29:59,160
Speaker 5: and even in speaking engagements. I thought that I had

512
00:29:59,200 --> 00:30:03,120
Speaker 5: to have a in order to be an asset or

513
00:30:03,160 --> 00:30:05,360
Speaker 5: to be an inspiration to other people. But then I

514
00:30:05,440 --> 00:30:09,480
Speaker 5: learned that people really value and appreciate imperfect people and

515
00:30:09,520 --> 00:30:12,800
Speaker 5: imperfections anyway. So that's something really important to note, Like,

516
00:30:12,840 --> 00:30:14,600
Speaker 5: you don't have to be a perfect person that doesn't

517
00:30:14,680 --> 00:30:17,800
Speaker 5: exist in order for you to inspire or motivate other people.

518
00:30:18,160 --> 00:30:21,120
Speaker 5: They will most likely connect with your vulnerability and the

519
00:30:21,200 --> 00:30:22,320
Speaker 5: authenticity anyway.

520
00:30:24,240 --> 00:30:28,120
Speaker 2: Yes, just think about Michelle Obama in that was in

521
00:30:28,440 --> 00:30:30,720
Speaker 2: towards the end of twenty twenty, and we all know

522
00:30:30,800 --> 00:30:32,960
Speaker 2: what was happening in our world and in our lives

523
00:30:33,240 --> 00:30:38,480
Speaker 2: in twenty twenty, and she shared on her podcast and

524
00:30:38,560 --> 00:30:43,120
Speaker 2: in several interviews that she was experiencing low grade depression.

525
00:30:44,320 --> 00:30:47,560
Speaker 2: Did we stop following Michelle Obama because she said that

526
00:30:47,640 --> 00:30:53,000
Speaker 2: she was experiencing depression? No is anything that made her

527
00:30:53,160 --> 00:30:57,280
Speaker 2: more relatable. So I think that that goes to that

528
00:30:57,440 --> 00:30:59,880
Speaker 2: misconception that you talked about, right, Like, that doesn't that

529
00:31:00,680 --> 00:31:04,400
Speaker 2: having depression does, or having a depressive episode does not

530
00:31:04,480 --> 00:31:09,040
Speaker 2: take away from your ability to inspire and motivate. I

531
00:31:09,040 --> 00:31:14,880
Speaker 2: think another misconception that's tied into that is that people

532
00:31:14,920 --> 00:31:19,120
Speaker 2: think that it could detract from your credibility and your brilliance.

533
00:31:19,400 --> 00:31:25,360
Speaker 2: Right again, Auntie Chelle out here talking about she had

534
00:31:25,960 --> 00:31:29,760
Speaker 2: low grade depression, and nobody is about to go and

535
00:31:29,840 --> 00:31:34,200
Speaker 2: take away her law degree, right, Nobody's about to tell

536
00:31:34,240 --> 00:31:37,960
Speaker 2: her that her work at Princeton ain't shit because she

537
00:31:38,160 --> 00:31:45,640
Speaker 2: experienced depression. And the same thing applies to you. Yes you, lady,

538
00:31:45,680 --> 00:31:52,040
Speaker 2: that's listening and having that question, yes you, It does

539
00:31:52,320 --> 00:31:59,120
Speaker 2: not take away from your credibility or your brilliance.

540
00:32:00,240 --> 00:32:02,240
Speaker 5: At a spot on Dom And it makes me think

541
00:32:02,320 --> 00:32:05,440
Speaker 5: back to when I was with this one particular therapist

542
00:32:05,720 --> 00:32:07,840
Speaker 5: and she had mentioned how she was going to therapy,

543
00:32:08,120 --> 00:32:10,400
Speaker 5: and it actually made me so happy to hear that

544
00:32:10,440 --> 00:32:12,880
Speaker 5: because I learned at a very young age that every

545
00:32:12,920 --> 00:32:15,400
Speaker 5: teacher needs a teacher, like every coach to have a coach.

546
00:32:15,440 --> 00:32:18,480
Speaker 5: Everyone should be accountable to someone and ideally should be

547
00:32:18,920 --> 00:32:22,760
Speaker 5: developing themselves or growing and expanding in some way, no

548
00:32:22,760 --> 00:32:25,160
Speaker 5: matter what level you're at. And so for me, I

549
00:32:25,200 --> 00:32:27,160
Speaker 5: was like, Oh, that's super dope. Like that my therapist

550
00:32:27,200 --> 00:32:27,760
Speaker 5: has a therapist.

551
00:32:27,840 --> 00:32:28,320
Speaker 2: It made me.

552
00:32:29,040 --> 00:32:31,200
Speaker 5: It just made it more normal, Like it felt like

553
00:32:31,480 --> 00:32:35,480
Speaker 5: it was normalizing using therapy as a tool for us

554
00:32:36,000 --> 00:32:39,800
Speaker 5: and really just taking away the stigma. And I think

555
00:32:39,840 --> 00:32:42,400
Speaker 5: for me as well, Dom, the more that I see

556
00:32:42,440 --> 00:32:50,120
Speaker 5: my humanness and I realized that my mental struggles don't

557
00:32:50,160 --> 00:32:52,960
Speaker 5: detract from my credibility and brilliance, it allows me to

558
00:32:53,000 --> 00:32:57,360
Speaker 5: extend that same perspective to other people as well. So

559
00:32:57,440 --> 00:32:59,240
Speaker 5: I really do believe like it starts with ourselves.

560
00:32:59,320 --> 00:32:59,560
Speaker 6: First.

561
00:33:00,120 --> 00:33:02,479
Speaker 5: You are still worthy, you know, if you have if

562
00:33:02,520 --> 00:33:05,240
Speaker 5: you're struggling with something, and other people are too, so

563
00:33:05,280 --> 00:33:08,680
Speaker 5: it kind of goes hand in hand, and that takes

564
00:33:08,760 --> 00:33:12,120
Speaker 5: us only to number three, which is there's nothing to

565
00:33:12,160 --> 00:33:14,600
Speaker 5: be ashamed of. Sometimes there is a lot of shame

566
00:33:15,080 --> 00:33:18,040
Speaker 5: that comes along with either being depressed or struggling with

567
00:33:18,080 --> 00:33:21,280
Speaker 5: some type of you know, mental illness and mental struggle.

568
00:33:21,360 --> 00:33:24,120
Speaker 5: And I honestly believe that the more we speak about it,

569
00:33:24,200 --> 00:33:27,400
Speaker 5: the more that we can normalize these conversations and decrease

570
00:33:27,440 --> 00:33:29,800
Speaker 5: the stigma, which is why we're chatting about it now.

571
00:33:30,160 --> 00:33:32,960
Speaker 5: There definitely was a time where I would not have

572
00:33:33,000 --> 00:33:36,200
Speaker 5: these conversations publicly, and I would not share my personal

573
00:33:36,240 --> 00:33:39,000
Speaker 5: struggles or the fact that I randomly, you know, have

574
00:33:39,080 --> 00:33:41,360
Speaker 5: the thought of, hmm, you it would be like to

575
00:33:41,480 --> 00:33:44,479
Speaker 5: jump off this building or wherever I might be. You know,

576
00:33:44,800 --> 00:33:46,880
Speaker 5: I wouldn't say that out loud, but I think because

577
00:33:47,640 --> 00:33:50,959
Speaker 5: I have more knowledge and more empathy for myself and

578
00:33:51,000 --> 00:33:53,880
Speaker 5: I realize what it is internally, that it allows me

579
00:33:53,920 --> 00:33:57,920
Speaker 5: to just share openly so that is our third misconception?

580
00:33:58,040 --> 00:34:03,320
Speaker 2: Lady, Yes, I yeah. I think that the more we

581
00:34:03,640 --> 00:34:07,240
Speaker 2: talk about it, the more it's normalized, the more we

582
00:34:07,480 --> 00:34:11,400
Speaker 2: decrease the stigma, you know, And I think about you know,

583
00:34:13,239 --> 00:34:18,200
Speaker 2: I I remember, like I recognize that, like I have

584
00:34:18,520 --> 00:34:23,520
Speaker 2: when I'm driving across bridges, I have this thought of,

585
00:34:25,280 --> 00:34:28,200
Speaker 2: oh lord, what if my car, like what if something happens?

586
00:34:28,280 --> 00:34:31,000
Speaker 2: And particularly when I was living in the Bay, like

587
00:34:32,440 --> 00:34:35,680
Speaker 2: because we had heard about the years ago about that

588
00:34:36,000 --> 00:34:40,040
Speaker 2: horrible earthquake and part of the Bay Bridge collapse, like

589
00:34:40,719 --> 00:34:43,279
Speaker 2: driving over that, I would have that fear like what

590
00:34:43,400 --> 00:34:45,279
Speaker 2: the hell would happen if if there's an earthquake? And

591
00:34:45,360 --> 00:34:47,359
Speaker 2: like I follow this and not follow in this faith

592
00:34:47,880 --> 00:34:50,560
Speaker 2: like the bridge collapse, or like if I'm driving over

593
00:34:50,600 --> 00:34:53,839
Speaker 2: other bridges, like what happens if something random happens, and

594
00:34:53,880 --> 00:34:57,640
Speaker 2: like my cargoes into into the water. I want to

595
00:34:57,680 --> 00:35:01,520
Speaker 2: be clear that that's not a thought of suicide, right,

596
00:35:01,840 --> 00:35:05,399
Speaker 2: Like I'm in a great space and like fantastic action,

597
00:35:06,400 --> 00:35:11,040
Speaker 2: and I have those thoughts and that those thoughts are

598
00:35:11,120 --> 00:35:18,400
Speaker 2: more about anxiety than depression or suicide. Right, So I

599
00:35:18,480 --> 00:35:20,360
Speaker 2: want to put it out there that there are thoughts

600
00:35:20,360 --> 00:35:22,680
Speaker 2: that we have and how we can start to distinguish

601
00:35:22,719 --> 00:35:26,839
Speaker 2: those thoughts right, and that there's nothing to be ashamed

602
00:35:26,840 --> 00:35:30,680
Speaker 2: of with having those thoughts, and which goes to our

603
00:35:30,719 --> 00:35:38,200
Speaker 2: next misconception that you are not quote unquote crazy. Now,

604
00:35:38,480 --> 00:35:41,960
Speaker 2: those who know me know that I am not a

605
00:35:42,000 --> 00:35:47,600
Speaker 2: fan of the word race, particularly around with mental health,

606
00:35:49,000 --> 00:35:52,680
Speaker 2: and that I work very hard, very intentionally in my

607
00:35:52,840 --> 00:35:59,440
Speaker 2: own everyday language to not use that word. Like sometimes

608
00:35:59,480 --> 00:36:05,120
Speaker 2: I'll be in conversation with someone and I might even say,

609
00:36:05,160 --> 00:36:08,120
Speaker 2: I'd be like, man, that shit is crazy, and then

610
00:36:08,160 --> 00:36:11,239
Speaker 2: I will stop myself in the moment and say, wait,

611
00:36:11,280 --> 00:36:13,600
Speaker 2: hold on, let me step back, let me clarify what

612
00:36:13,640 --> 00:36:18,400
Speaker 2: I really mean by what's happened with how I'm really

613
00:36:18,440 --> 00:36:23,360
Speaker 2: trying to describe this experience, because I want to be intentional,

614
00:36:23,760 --> 00:36:27,680
Speaker 2: And even with clients who come in and they say

615
00:36:28,080 --> 00:36:31,240
Speaker 2: that someone told them that they were crazy or someone

616
00:36:31,320 --> 00:36:34,520
Speaker 2: said some called something crazy, I stopped them and like

617
00:36:35,000 --> 00:36:37,839
Speaker 2: we unpack that, Like what does that word really mean?

618
00:36:39,520 --> 00:36:48,000
Speaker 2: And let's be clear that if you are experiencing any

619
00:36:48,120 --> 00:36:53,400
Speaker 2: type of psychological concern or symptom, it's nothing to be

620
00:36:53,440 --> 00:36:56,680
Speaker 2: ashamed of and it doesn't make you quote unquote crazy.

621
00:36:58,360 --> 00:37:03,520
Speaker 2: And even folks who have severe mental illness, because usually

622
00:37:03,560 --> 00:37:06,359
Speaker 2: that's what we associate the word crazy with someone who's

623
00:37:06,440 --> 00:37:11,640
Speaker 2: experiencing severe mental illness. They still do not deserve to

624
00:37:11,760 --> 00:37:18,239
Speaker 2: be called crazy. What might be happening to them psychologically.

625
00:37:18,960 --> 00:37:26,840
Speaker 3: Is horrific, bizarre, strange, but.

626
00:37:26,960 --> 00:37:32,640
Speaker 2: They themselves are not crazy. And lady, if you are

627
00:37:32,719 --> 00:37:38,480
Speaker 2: experiencing depression, you are not crazy. There may be moments

628
00:37:38,520 --> 00:37:40,520
Speaker 2: where you feel like you are having an out of

629
00:37:40,600 --> 00:37:45,560
Speaker 2: body experience because it might be something that you're not

630
00:37:45,840 --> 00:37:51,640
Speaker 2: used to, but again, I cannot reiterate enough you are

631
00:37:51,680 --> 00:37:52,600
Speaker 2: not crazy.

632
00:37:53,560 --> 00:37:56,719
Speaker 5: I'm just snapping, go ahead, down and hit the nail

633
00:37:56,760 --> 00:37:58,920
Speaker 5: the head with that one. I think this would be

634
00:37:58,960 --> 00:38:00,880
Speaker 5: a good time for us to talk a bit about

635
00:38:01,040 --> 00:38:05,600
Speaker 5: our depression slash mental health toolbox and what we have

636
00:38:05,640 --> 00:38:08,080
Speaker 5: in our toolbox now. But we've talked about this on

637
00:38:08,200 --> 00:38:11,440
Speaker 5: numerous episodes as far as what we do to be okay,

638
00:38:12,040 --> 00:38:14,000
Speaker 5: and I think I have many where I know I

639
00:38:14,040 --> 00:38:16,960
Speaker 5: have many practices in my toolbox, but I only wanted

640
00:38:16,960 --> 00:38:19,239
Speaker 5: to touch on the ones that I actually use for

641
00:38:19,400 --> 00:38:24,160
Speaker 5: this specific time, just to share. So the first one

642
00:38:24,320 --> 00:38:27,799
Speaker 5: for me is clean my space. That is I feel

643
00:38:27,840 --> 00:38:29,879
Speaker 5: like that's always so important for me because that kind

644
00:38:29,880 --> 00:38:33,440
Speaker 5: of goes back to what we've said on the podcast.

645
00:38:33,880 --> 00:38:36,239
Speaker 5: Dom this is one of your favorite sayings is not

646
00:38:36,280 --> 00:38:39,160
Speaker 5: trust the process, but control what you can control, or

647
00:38:39,200 --> 00:38:41,600
Speaker 5: focus on what you can control. And for me, when

648
00:38:41,640 --> 00:38:43,719
Speaker 5: I feel there's chaos in my mind, I love to

649
00:38:43,800 --> 00:38:45,799
Speaker 5: just have a clean space in general, but when I

650
00:38:45,800 --> 00:38:48,960
Speaker 5: feel like my mind is chaotic, cleaning my space and

651
00:38:49,000 --> 00:38:52,320
Speaker 5: having it look pretty and smell good that does something

652
00:38:52,360 --> 00:38:54,759
Speaker 5: for my spirit. And I know that about myself. So

653
00:38:54,840 --> 00:38:56,480
Speaker 5: that is one of the first things that I do

654
00:38:56,600 --> 00:39:00,040
Speaker 5: usually before I get into the second one. Anything I

655
00:39:00,080 --> 00:39:01,640
Speaker 5: want to add to that one down.

656
00:39:02,200 --> 00:39:06,480
Speaker 2: Listen what I notice, and other people may be experience,

657
00:39:06,560 --> 00:39:08,480
Speaker 2: may experience this as well. So this is why I

658
00:39:08,480 --> 00:39:13,080
Speaker 2: want to share it is that I, particularly when I

659
00:39:13,160 --> 00:39:17,920
Speaker 2: was teaching, I wouldn't notice that towards the like in

660
00:39:18,000 --> 00:39:23,759
Speaker 2: the most stressful, hectic parts of the semester, when I

661
00:39:23,800 --> 00:39:28,440
Speaker 2: was feeling anxious or I might have been feeling burned out,

662
00:39:28,960 --> 00:39:34,080
Speaker 2: it was reflected in my space, right And so lady,

663
00:39:34,280 --> 00:39:36,680
Speaker 2: this is you. This is something to pay attention to.

664
00:39:37,360 --> 00:39:45,120
Speaker 2: So I noticed that when my apartment is cluttered because

665
00:39:45,120 --> 00:39:48,719
Speaker 2: I'm a mild germophobe. That's the topic for another conversation.

666
00:39:48,880 --> 00:39:53,320
Speaker 2: But I'm a mild germophobe and so maybe high key germophobe,

667
00:39:53,600 --> 00:39:59,520
Speaker 2: and so my place is not going to be dirty,

668
00:39:59,640 --> 00:40:04,360
Speaker 2: but it's gonna be cluttered, right, because it's a reflection,

669
00:40:04,520 --> 00:40:06,840
Speaker 2: like you said, Tea, of what's going on in my mind.

670
00:40:07,640 --> 00:40:12,560
Speaker 2: So laundry might be piled up, So I might have

671
00:40:12,640 --> 00:40:16,680
Speaker 2: that that laundry, that laundry body next to next to

672
00:40:16,680 --> 00:40:21,120
Speaker 2: me in the bed because I just don't have the

673
00:40:21,320 --> 00:40:25,799
Speaker 2: energy or wherewithal to motivation to fold the clothes after

674
00:40:25,880 --> 00:40:29,560
Speaker 2: I've actually done the laundry, or laundry might pile up

675
00:40:30,680 --> 00:40:32,920
Speaker 2: for a really long time, even though I have a

676
00:40:33,000 --> 00:40:37,160
Speaker 2: washing on driver right here in my apartment. Dishes might

677
00:40:37,239 --> 00:40:39,120
Speaker 2: pile up in the sink, and I might forget to

678
00:40:39,200 --> 00:40:44,040
Speaker 2: run the dishwasher right like and again like raise germo, folks,

679
00:40:44,080 --> 00:40:46,400
Speaker 2: So dishes everything is rint, but stuff is starting to

680
00:40:46,400 --> 00:40:53,160
Speaker 2: stack up, right, work papers all over the place, mail

681
00:40:53,960 --> 00:41:00,600
Speaker 2: scattered on the dining room table. Right. And so when

682
00:41:00,680 --> 00:41:04,040
Speaker 2: I start to notice that those little things are happening,

683
00:41:05,000 --> 00:41:10,799
Speaker 2: that's an indicator that something's off. And so one thing

684
00:41:10,840 --> 00:41:15,040
Speaker 2: that helps me in that toolbox is as I mentioned

685
00:41:15,080 --> 00:41:19,319
Speaker 2: in previous episodes, having a housekeeper, someone who comes in

686
00:41:19,520 --> 00:41:25,680
Speaker 2: regularly to clean my space, because then that also if

687
00:41:25,719 --> 00:41:28,080
Speaker 2: I'm in. First of all, I can't have the housekeeper.

688
00:41:28,120 --> 00:41:29,759
Speaker 2: I know I'm on a tangent, but we're gonna roll

689
00:41:29,840 --> 00:41:32,000
Speaker 2: with it. I can't have the housekeeper, and I know

690
00:41:32,080 --> 00:41:33,719
Speaker 2: other people can relate to this. I can't have the

691
00:41:33,719 --> 00:41:35,680
Speaker 2: housekeeper seeing me in the cluttered.

692
00:41:35,360 --> 00:41:40,239
Speaker 5: Space, right, come on, somebody, So.

693
00:41:40,360 --> 00:41:44,000
Speaker 2: Having the housekeeper come in forces me to reset even

694
00:41:44,040 --> 00:41:47,360
Speaker 2: if I'm in. So if I'm in that headspace and

695
00:41:47,560 --> 00:41:52,920
Speaker 2: I might not have the energy to clean my space,

696
00:41:55,320 --> 00:41:59,759
Speaker 2: the housekeeper can't do all of it. So now I'm

697
00:42:00,360 --> 00:42:06,040
Speaker 2: to do it, which then housekeeper leaves and I have

698
00:42:06,080 --> 00:42:10,640
Speaker 2: a clean space and my moon shifts because I have

699
00:42:10,680 --> 00:42:14,040
Speaker 2: a clean space. So that was a long tangent to

700
00:42:14,120 --> 00:42:19,479
Speaker 2: support this idea and really to also help illustrate how

701
00:42:19,560 --> 00:42:24,720
Speaker 2: that plays out in real life. Right. So the second

702
00:42:24,760 --> 00:42:30,560
Speaker 2: item in our toolbox is to meditate. People meditate for

703
00:42:30,600 --> 00:42:37,800
Speaker 2: different reasons. Some people meditate to empower them. I meditate

704
00:42:38,960 --> 00:42:42,800
Speaker 2: to encourage ress, like I use meditation to fall asleep.

705
00:42:45,160 --> 00:42:52,480
Speaker 2: But when you are experiencing a depressive episode, meditation can

706
00:42:52,560 --> 00:42:57,200
Speaker 2: help ground you when you're feeling Also anxiety, meditation can

707
00:42:57,239 --> 00:43:00,800
Speaker 2: help ground you and bring you back to the present

708
00:43:00,960 --> 00:43:05,680
Speaker 2: moment that you're in. So see how did meditation help

709
00:43:05,719 --> 00:43:07,160
Speaker 2: you in this particular instance.

710
00:43:08,160 --> 00:43:11,200
Speaker 5: Yes, for sure, Well after the space is clean, smelling good,

711
00:43:11,200 --> 00:43:13,400
Speaker 5: I got the candles, litt and everything. Meditation for me,

712
00:43:13,480 --> 00:43:16,840
Speaker 5: it does help with grounding. It also really helps me

713
00:43:17,080 --> 00:43:20,000
Speaker 5: because I am in my head a lot. I feel

714
00:43:20,040 --> 00:43:22,360
Speaker 5: like I'm so grateful. I used to complain about this,

715
00:43:22,440 --> 00:43:24,560
Speaker 5: but I'm so grateful for this beautiful mind that I have.

716
00:43:25,200 --> 00:43:29,000
Speaker 5: And there are so many creative thoughts and ideas and

717
00:43:29,080 --> 00:43:32,520
Speaker 5: conversations going on up and here, and it can be

718
00:43:32,640 --> 00:43:35,200
Speaker 5: very overwhelming at times. And so for me, meditation does

719
00:43:35,280 --> 00:43:37,640
Speaker 5: help to just bring me to the present moment, allow

720
00:43:37,719 --> 00:43:40,560
Speaker 5: me to focus on my breath, calm down, stop the

721
00:43:40,640 --> 00:43:44,960
Speaker 5: constant thoughts. And part of my meditation process often includes

722
00:43:44,960 --> 00:43:46,880
Speaker 5: a brain dump where I can get stuff out of

723
00:43:46,880 --> 00:43:48,920
Speaker 5: my head and put it on paper. And then also

724
00:43:49,000 --> 00:43:52,279
Speaker 5: gratitude is also part of the meditation practice because even

725
00:43:52,320 --> 00:43:55,640
Speaker 5: though you know I mentioned this in our and the

726
00:43:55,719 --> 00:43:58,520
Speaker 5: intro about you know, having all these amazing things in

727
00:43:58,560 --> 00:44:02,319
Speaker 5: life and still feeling low. Just acknowledging what I have

728
00:44:02,960 --> 00:44:06,120
Speaker 5: it does make me really grateful, Like if y'all are

729
00:44:06,520 --> 00:44:08,759
Speaker 5: you know faithful supporters. You know that we did an

730
00:44:08,800 --> 00:44:12,880
Speaker 5: episode about chronic pain and I talked about how after

731
00:44:12,920 --> 00:44:14,640
Speaker 5: I had the baby, I wanted to get a pedicure

732
00:44:14,680 --> 00:44:17,080
Speaker 5: and I had this this I got this Pierre Nikkia,

733
00:44:17,160 --> 00:44:19,279
Speaker 5: I think it's called this this inground toe now on

734
00:44:19,280 --> 00:44:21,880
Speaker 5: my toe, and literally it was it was it was

735
00:44:21,880 --> 00:44:23,640
Speaker 5: like infected and it was causing me pain for like

736
00:44:23,680 --> 00:44:26,640
Speaker 5: a year. So when I do my gratitude in the mornings,

737
00:44:26,680 --> 00:44:29,040
Speaker 5: now I am grateful because my toe is healed and

738
00:44:29,120 --> 00:44:31,239
Speaker 5: I don't have that constant pain. So now I have

739
00:44:31,280 --> 00:44:33,960
Speaker 5: a great appreciation for that because I experienced what it

740
00:44:34,000 --> 00:44:36,239
Speaker 5: was like for a year to deal with this and

741
00:44:36,280 --> 00:44:39,040
Speaker 5: have all these various procedures on it. So now something

742
00:44:39,080 --> 00:44:40,799
Speaker 5: like that is a part of my gratitude and I'm

743
00:44:40,840 --> 00:44:43,040
Speaker 5: just extremely grateful for it because it was such a

744
00:44:43,040 --> 00:44:47,000
Speaker 5: painful experience. So I like to also think about things

745
00:44:47,040 --> 00:44:49,640
Speaker 5: that I often take for granted, right like having a

746
00:44:49,680 --> 00:44:53,680
Speaker 5: clear you know pathway what is it called airway?

747
00:44:53,880 --> 00:44:54,200
Speaker 2: And my.

748
00:44:55,960 --> 00:44:59,360
Speaker 5: No, thank you, Dom'm helping me with my birds today,

749
00:44:59,600 --> 00:45:02,160
Speaker 5: having a clear nasal passage because I've been stealthy for

750
00:45:02,200 --> 00:45:05,120
Speaker 5: the past few weeks, and so once this clears up,

751
00:45:05,480 --> 00:45:07,239
Speaker 5: that's going to be added to the gratitude list. So

752
00:45:07,280 --> 00:45:10,320
Speaker 5: I think it does help, which is grounding and reorienting

753
00:45:10,440 --> 00:45:13,920
Speaker 5: myself as I am attempting to move through whatever difficult

754
00:45:13,960 --> 00:45:17,719
Speaker 5: situation I'm in. And that takes us to number three,

755
00:45:17,840 --> 00:45:20,520
Speaker 5: which is move your body. Move move your body. And

756
00:45:20,560 --> 00:45:22,600
Speaker 5: for me, you know, I'll be in the gym, y'all.

757
00:45:22,719 --> 00:45:24,719
Speaker 5: I'm going three days a week right now, working with

758
00:45:24,760 --> 00:45:27,640
Speaker 5: a trainer and the gym. It just really has my

759
00:45:27,680 --> 00:45:31,080
Speaker 5: body feeling amazing, even on those low energy days, Like

760
00:45:31,320 --> 00:45:33,160
Speaker 5: it just does something. I know it releases dumb you

761
00:45:33,160 --> 00:45:35,480
Speaker 5: can probably speak to this. I know it releases endorphins

762
00:45:35,520 --> 00:45:38,400
Speaker 5: and a lot of other scientific stuff. It just it

763
00:45:38,400 --> 00:45:43,520
Speaker 5: makes me feel amazing. So move your body, whether it's dancing, gym, treadmill,

764
00:45:43,600 --> 00:45:44,239
Speaker 5: whatever it is.

765
00:45:45,560 --> 00:45:48,960
Speaker 2: Yeah, I second that. I mean, and even if you know,

766
00:45:49,000 --> 00:45:52,480
Speaker 2: and I remember telling folks during the pandemic, at the

767
00:45:52,520 --> 00:45:55,320
Speaker 2: start of the pandemic, in the height of the pandemic,

768
00:45:55,719 --> 00:45:59,040
Speaker 2: when gyms were legit shut down, nobody you could not

769
00:45:59,239 --> 00:46:03,120
Speaker 2: go and people didn't really have the motivation. What I

770
00:46:03,160 --> 00:46:06,319
Speaker 2: would tell folks is and I continue to continue to

771
00:46:06,360 --> 00:46:09,920
Speaker 2: tell folks when they're experiencing depression or they're lacking motivation,

772
00:46:10,000 --> 00:46:13,880
Speaker 2: that gets started with working out. Move your body for

773
00:46:13,880 --> 00:46:18,279
Speaker 2: fifteen minutes, right, set a timer, move your body for

774
00:46:18,320 --> 00:46:22,359
Speaker 2: fifteen minutes, and see how much that helps you. What

775
00:46:22,480 --> 00:46:24,839
Speaker 2: I notice is that when I because I go through

776
00:46:24,880 --> 00:46:26,960
Speaker 2: cycles of when I'm really on top of it with

777
00:46:27,120 --> 00:46:33,080
Speaker 2: working out and when I'm in a slump, and in

778
00:46:33,120 --> 00:46:37,320
Speaker 2: those slumps, I notice the difference in my body because

779
00:46:37,360 --> 00:46:42,000
Speaker 2: I'm not moving it. And so even like the slightest

780
00:46:42,080 --> 00:46:45,840
Speaker 2: things like ladies is about to be TMI. But you'll

781
00:46:46,000 --> 00:46:49,640
Speaker 2: you'll relate if you go, if you go and go

782
00:46:49,719 --> 00:46:54,719
Speaker 2: for waxing, like even the slightest like oh, I have

783
00:46:54,800 --> 00:46:57,799
Speaker 2: to lift up my arm so that they can do

784
00:46:57,840 --> 00:47:02,080
Speaker 2: the underarm wax. If you are are not moving your

785
00:47:02,160 --> 00:47:07,759
Speaker 2: body in a regularly, you start to feel stiff and

786
00:47:08,400 --> 00:47:13,000
Speaker 2: little things start to hurt, which then adds to the depression.

787
00:47:13,480 --> 00:47:15,799
Speaker 2: And I get that when we're you know, when we

788
00:47:15,840 --> 00:47:21,719
Speaker 2: are in a serious depressive episode, that you don't have

789
00:47:21,800 --> 00:47:28,480
Speaker 2: the energy give yourself fifteen minutes, I would say, you know,

790
00:47:28,600 --> 00:47:30,400
Speaker 2: just think about the joy that you end up feeling

791
00:47:30,400 --> 00:47:32,120
Speaker 2: on the focus on the joy that you feel in

792
00:47:32,160 --> 00:47:34,960
Speaker 2: the other end of it. The other day, I was

793
00:47:35,040 --> 00:47:40,040
Speaker 2: with one of my nieces and my nephew and they're

794
00:47:40,560 --> 00:47:44,560
Speaker 2: five and two, and they were watching We were watching

795
00:47:44,680 --> 00:47:48,200
Speaker 2: I'm not even gonna try and say, some kid cartoon movie,

796
00:47:48,960 --> 00:47:51,600
Speaker 2: and there was a song that came on and they

797
00:47:51,719 --> 00:47:55,560
Speaker 2: wanted to get up and dance, and I got up

798
00:47:55,600 --> 00:47:58,040
Speaker 2: and I was like moving my body with the little

799
00:47:58,040 --> 00:48:03,400
Speaker 2: ones and I was already in a decent move but

800
00:48:03,719 --> 00:48:07,239
Speaker 2: the joy that I felt after like letting go of

801
00:48:07,360 --> 00:48:11,200
Speaker 2: the thoughts of like having the dance perfect right, like

802
00:48:11,360 --> 00:48:14,760
Speaker 2: just literally just moving my body with the little ones,

803
00:48:15,680 --> 00:48:20,359
Speaker 2: like you're right, Tea, that it releases endorphins, and those

804
00:48:20,520 --> 00:48:24,840
Speaker 2: endorphins those are the things that increase pleasure and reduce pain,

805
00:48:25,239 --> 00:48:27,600
Speaker 2: and that's what we want to continue to do. And

806
00:48:27,680 --> 00:48:30,120
Speaker 2: so then that takes us to the fourth item in

807
00:48:30,160 --> 00:48:34,880
Speaker 2: the tool box, which is which is journaling getting those

808
00:48:34,920 --> 00:48:40,279
Speaker 2: thoughts out. You know, I tell clients all the time

809
00:48:40,320 --> 00:48:44,000
Speaker 2: that journaling doesn't have to just be writing. You know,

810
00:48:44,440 --> 00:48:48,560
Speaker 2: TU taught me this early on that like video recording

811
00:48:48,600 --> 00:48:51,680
Speaker 2: yourself and getting those thoughts out on the video and

812
00:48:52,440 --> 00:48:57,160
Speaker 2: doing or doing a voice note, right, So it doesn't

813
00:48:57,200 --> 00:49:00,600
Speaker 2: have to be writing It doesn't have to be typing

814
00:49:00,640 --> 00:49:03,719
Speaker 2: it out on the computer. You determine the medium that

815
00:49:03,840 --> 00:49:08,040
Speaker 2: feels right for you. But get those words out of

816
00:49:08,080 --> 00:49:15,080
Speaker 2: your head onto something, onto a phone, laptop, piece of paper.

817
00:49:15,760 --> 00:49:17,000
Speaker 2: Get them out of your head.

818
00:49:17,160 --> 00:49:21,560
Speaker 5: That helps, amen, y'all know I will voice note it up,

819
00:49:21,600 --> 00:49:24,239
Speaker 5: and I have thousands of notes on my phone. So yes, yes,

820
00:49:24,320 --> 00:49:27,440
Speaker 5: yes to all that. The fifth one, y'all, is nap.

821
00:49:28,120 --> 00:49:30,960
Speaker 5: I find it sometimes. I know all this is u

822
00:49:31,080 --> 00:49:33,560
Speaker 5: Don's alley or down a play about her sleep. I

823
00:49:33,600 --> 00:49:37,040
Speaker 5: saw your face when I said nap, so yeah, I

824
00:49:37,280 --> 00:49:39,319
Speaker 5: think I'm a topasity to you, don't. The only thing

825
00:49:39,360 --> 00:49:41,640
Speaker 5: I'll say is like, sometimes it's just helpful to take

826
00:49:41,640 --> 00:49:44,440
Speaker 5: a nap, and it helps to sort of reset the energy.

827
00:49:44,920 --> 00:49:47,759
Speaker 5: Sometimes if I feel so exhausted, I'll take a nap

828
00:49:47,760 --> 00:49:49,400
Speaker 5: and I'll try to think about something that I might

829
00:49:49,440 --> 00:49:51,919
Speaker 5: want to dream about, so I can just go into

830
00:49:51,960 --> 00:49:54,200
Speaker 5: a different space, you know, to kind of shift my mood.

831
00:49:54,239 --> 00:49:55,440
Speaker 6: But that's all.

832
00:49:55,760 --> 00:49:57,120
Speaker 5: That's all I have to say about napping.

833
00:49:58,960 --> 00:50:01,480
Speaker 2: I would say, yeah, you know how much I love sleep,

834
00:50:01,680 --> 00:50:06,560
Speaker 2: and I would say that be mindful of just use

835
00:50:06,600 --> 00:50:11,960
Speaker 2: it for data. Right. So if you find that you

836
00:50:12,040 --> 00:50:16,520
Speaker 2: are napping every day for multiple hours in addition to sleeping,

837
00:50:17,440 --> 00:50:20,280
Speaker 2: that's a sign of a bigger issue. We're no longer

838
00:50:20,360 --> 00:50:24,880
Speaker 2: using napping to as part of our toolbox. Napping is

839
00:50:24,920 --> 00:50:29,440
Speaker 2: now a symptom of our depression. So we want to

840
00:50:29,440 --> 00:50:31,080
Speaker 2: be mindful and we want to make sure that if

841
00:50:31,080 --> 00:50:37,720
Speaker 2: we're napping in a healthy way that twenty to thirty

842
00:50:37,800 --> 00:50:43,880
Speaker 2: minutes our mats to give ourselves a chance to reset. Right.

843
00:50:45,760 --> 00:50:51,320
Speaker 2: A nap is not slumber. So if we're going past

844
00:50:51,360 --> 00:50:57,200
Speaker 2: an hour again, past an hour multiple days in a row,

845
00:50:58,080 --> 00:51:01,080
Speaker 2: that might be the sign of a problem. Naps in

846
00:51:01,120 --> 00:51:05,640
Speaker 2: general can be healthy and done in moderation. And so

847
00:51:05,719 --> 00:51:10,080
Speaker 2: then that takes us to our sixth tip in the toolbox,

848
00:51:10,080 --> 00:51:17,440
Speaker 2: which is to cry. Listen, let them tears flow, and

849
00:51:17,920 --> 00:51:21,520
Speaker 2: if you sometimes I know that when we are feeling depressed,

850
00:51:23,040 --> 00:51:26,040
Speaker 2: the tears might be right there on the cusp of

851
00:51:26,160 --> 00:51:32,080
Speaker 2: coming out, but they won't fall. I cry pretty easily,

852
00:51:32,600 --> 00:51:36,200
Speaker 2: So what I think would usually if I find myself

853
00:51:36,239 --> 00:51:40,640
Speaker 2: in a space where I need to cry and I can't, like,

854
00:51:40,680 --> 00:51:43,240
Speaker 2: I know that that release is going to be helpful.

855
00:51:43,840 --> 00:51:46,680
Speaker 2: What I do is I listen to a song that

856
00:51:46,800 --> 00:51:53,160
Speaker 2: I know is going to release tears like I have

857
00:51:53,400 --> 00:51:57,799
Speaker 2: a handful of songs, then automatically, no matter what kind

858
00:51:57,840 --> 00:52:00,160
Speaker 2: of mood I'm in them, tears.

859
00:51:59,840 --> 00:52:03,480
Speaker 5: Are slowly Girl, I was gonna, I'm so glad you

860
00:52:03,480 --> 00:52:05,400
Speaker 5: said that. There are two songs I can think of

861
00:52:05,400 --> 00:52:07,040
Speaker 5: off the top of my head. One is the song

862
00:52:07,040 --> 00:52:09,680
Speaker 5: they played in my dad's funeral. It's a donniemcclerking song.

863
00:52:10,040 --> 00:52:14,160
Speaker 5: And the other one is I'll Be Missing You. That

864
00:52:14,239 --> 00:52:16,200
Speaker 5: literally comes on the radio I have to turn. That

865
00:52:16,280 --> 00:52:17,799
Speaker 5: is such a sad song to me. I think about

866
00:52:17,840 --> 00:52:21,200
Speaker 5: the music video with Oh my goodness. Yeah, I cannot

867
00:52:21,239 --> 00:52:23,080
Speaker 5: play that song. But I love that you said that

868
00:52:23,640 --> 00:52:26,360
Speaker 5: you try to initiate the client if you feel it

869
00:52:26,400 --> 00:52:29,399
Speaker 5: there that's so powerful, so consuming some type of piece

870
00:52:29,440 --> 00:52:33,040
Speaker 5: of content that will help you move through that. I

871
00:52:33,080 --> 00:52:35,120
Speaker 5: think that is a pro tip. I appreciate you sharing

872
00:52:35,120 --> 00:52:39,560
Speaker 5: that down and lady, that takes us to number seven.

873
00:52:39,560 --> 00:52:41,440
Speaker 5: We're gonna do a quick recap for you as well.

874
00:52:41,719 --> 00:52:49,040
Speaker 5: Number seven is slow Things DWN And my goal with

875
00:52:49,200 --> 00:52:52,560
Speaker 5: this here is because I'm fast, I'll be just moving

876
00:52:52,640 --> 00:52:54,880
Speaker 5: moving like I feel like sometimes I forget to breathe.

877
00:52:55,480 --> 00:52:57,279
Speaker 5: I think a lot of it does have to do

878
00:52:57,400 --> 00:53:00,440
Speaker 5: with upbringing in the type of environment up in when

879
00:53:00,480 --> 00:53:02,040
Speaker 5: I had to I was kind of in a constant

880
00:53:02,080 --> 00:53:05,040
Speaker 5: fight or flight mode. And I remember, y'all may think

881
00:53:05,080 --> 00:53:07,640
Speaker 5: I talk fast now, I used to talk hella fast

882
00:53:07,680 --> 00:53:10,560
Speaker 5: like people used to be like, slow down, What the

883
00:53:10,600 --> 00:53:12,319
Speaker 5: fuck did you just say? I used to talk very

884
00:53:12,400 --> 00:53:14,799
Speaker 5: very fast, and I was just like this because that's

885
00:53:14,840 --> 00:53:17,200
Speaker 5: how my brain just going going going. So for me,

886
00:53:17,280 --> 00:53:21,560
Speaker 5: when I slow down, my goal is to be responsive

887
00:53:21,840 --> 00:53:25,320
Speaker 5: versus reactive, and so I'll take lots of deep breaths.

888
00:53:25,840 --> 00:53:30,279
Speaker 5: I will also shy away from any major concerns that

889
00:53:30,440 --> 00:53:33,760
Speaker 5: might shift my energy or get me out of wax.

890
00:53:33,760 --> 00:53:37,560
Speaker 5: So let's say that I'm in this depressive state and

891
00:53:37,760 --> 00:53:39,319
Speaker 5: I know that I want to have a conversation with

892
00:53:39,360 --> 00:53:41,759
Speaker 5: a good friend about something that happened. I'll wait so

893
00:53:41,760 --> 00:53:44,399
Speaker 5: that I can be in a good headspace to dive

894
00:53:44,440 --> 00:53:46,560
Speaker 5: into that. And then the other thing for me is,

895
00:53:47,000 --> 00:53:49,920
Speaker 5: in this particular depressive state, I've slowed down so I

896
00:53:49,920 --> 00:53:52,360
Speaker 5: could be very patient with my daughter because she's a

897
00:53:52,400 --> 00:53:56,080
Speaker 5: toddler who's busy and testing limits to just try to,

898
00:53:56,120 --> 00:53:59,080
Speaker 5: you know, just explore the world. And sometimes I can

899
00:53:59,120 --> 00:54:01,839
Speaker 5: see how you can be in a depressive state and

900
00:54:01,880 --> 00:54:04,680
Speaker 5: you can respond in a way or react in a

901
00:54:04,719 --> 00:54:08,439
Speaker 5: way that you don't that you may regret later when

902
00:54:08,480 --> 00:54:10,760
Speaker 5: dealing with your children. And so for me, slowing down

903
00:54:11,160 --> 00:54:14,720
Speaker 5: allows me to be mindful and very intentional and also

904
00:54:14,880 --> 00:54:17,600
Speaker 5: allows me to communicate with my partner, so if I'm

905
00:54:17,640 --> 00:54:19,799
Speaker 5: feeling a certain way, I can let him know, like, Hey,

906
00:54:20,640 --> 00:54:23,759
Speaker 5: I'm going through this right now. I really need you

907
00:54:23,800 --> 00:54:25,839
Speaker 5: to be patient with me because I feel the horn.

908
00:54:26,400 --> 00:54:28,399
Speaker 5: You ever know when you feel the hormonaly like I'm

909
00:54:28,400 --> 00:54:32,760
Speaker 5: about to be real bitchy, Like it's about to really baby,

910
00:54:33,040 --> 00:54:36,080
Speaker 5: it's yeah, I'm about to be rageful, angry, petty, all that, Like,

911
00:54:36,120 --> 00:54:38,480
Speaker 5: I just feel it bubbling, and so being able to

912
00:54:38,520 --> 00:54:41,279
Speaker 5: slow things down and be self aware enough to communicate

913
00:54:41,280 --> 00:54:44,080
Speaker 5: that with those around me so that they know, oh

914
00:54:44,120 --> 00:54:45,960
Speaker 5: maybe I'll just chill. I won't play so much with

915
00:54:46,000 --> 00:54:48,000
Speaker 5: her right now because she's not in the mood she

916
00:54:48,120 --> 00:54:50,759
Speaker 5: with the shit. So yeah, all right, now, I guess

917
00:54:50,760 --> 00:54:51,800
Speaker 5: we should do our recap.

918
00:54:52,680 --> 00:54:59,360
Speaker 2: Yes, so our seven items and our mental health hoping

919
00:54:59,400 --> 00:55:09,560
Speaker 2: with depression toolbox for today is one clean your space, two, meditate, three,

920
00:55:09,960 --> 00:55:19,560
Speaker 2: move your body or journal bye now, six, five and

921
00:55:19,960 --> 00:55:21,799
Speaker 2: seven slow.

922
00:55:22,200 --> 00:55:27,000
Speaker 5: Things all right, lady, We appreciate you for tuning in.

923
00:55:27,120 --> 00:55:29,080
Speaker 5: Be sure to head on over to our instagram to

924
00:55:29,120 --> 00:55:31,880
Speaker 5: find that black square that says depression, so you can

925
00:55:31,880 --> 00:55:34,560
Speaker 5: share your feedback about the episode and the additional tips.

926
00:55:34,880 --> 00:55:36,759
Speaker 5: Anything that came up for you as you were tuning in,

927
00:55:37,080 --> 00:55:40,840
Speaker 5: be sure to share there on our Instagram. At hearspace podcast,

928
00:55:41,200 --> 00:55:43,720
Speaker 5: Dom and I are going to now end this episode

929
00:55:43,719 --> 00:55:45,920
Speaker 5: and go record the after show and we're going to

930
00:55:45,960 --> 00:55:47,719
Speaker 5: talk about some of the things that are making us

931
00:55:47,800 --> 00:55:50,200
Speaker 5: smile these days. So be sure to visit our website

932
00:55:50,320 --> 00:55:53,640
Speaker 5: Heirspace podcast dot com. Click on Wisdom Wednesday with Terry

933
00:55:53,680 --> 00:55:57,080
Speaker 5: Patreon to access our patreons so you can support us, y'all,

934
00:55:57,080 --> 00:56:00,640
Speaker 5: because this is a free resource that we give today community.

935
00:56:00,640 --> 00:56:04,440
Speaker 5: It's the labor of love and yeah, support, support your girls.

936
00:56:04,440 --> 00:56:06,840
Speaker 5: All right, we'll see you on Patreon you.

937
00:56:07,760 --> 00:56:10,560
Speaker 8: Hey, lady, it's doctor dom here from the Cultivating her

938
00:56:10,600 --> 00:56:14,600
Speaker 8: Space Podcast. Are you currently a resident of the state

939
00:56:14,640 --> 00:56:20,080
Speaker 8: of California and contemplating starting your therapy journey? Well, if so,

940
00:56:20,880 --> 00:56:25,120
Speaker 8: please reach out to me at doctor Dominique Brusard dot com.

941
00:56:25,560 --> 00:56:30,560
Speaker 8: That's d R D O M I N I q

942
00:56:30,760 --> 00:56:35,120
Speaker 8: U E B R O U S S r d

943
00:56:35,800 --> 00:56:40,840
Speaker 8: dot com to schedule a free fifteen minute consultation. I

944
00:56:40,920 --> 00:56:45,800
Speaker 8: look forward to hearing from you. Thanks for joining us today.

945
00:56:46,800 --> 00:56:52,279
Speaker 8: Please note that our show may contain conversations about self help, advice,

946
00:56:52,920 --> 00:56:57,160
Speaker 8: self empowerment, and mental health, but is by no means

947
00:56:57,360 --> 00:57:00,239
Speaker 8: meant to be a substitute for an ongoing form more

948
00:57:00,280 --> 00:57:04,719
Speaker 8: relationship with a trained mental health provider. If you are

949
00:57:04,760 --> 00:57:07,560
Speaker 8: someone you know is in need of mental health care,

950
00:57:08,160 --> 00:57:12,720
Speaker 8: please visit a Therapy for Black Girls directory Psychology today

951
00:57:13,560 --> 00:57:15,480
Speaker 8: or contact your insurance provider.

952
00:57:16,040 --> 00:57:17,880
Speaker 7: If you liked what you heard and want to keep

953
00:57:17,920 --> 00:57:22,920
Speaker 7: the conversation going, visit our website at cultivatinghirspace dot com

954
00:57:23,280 --> 00:57:25,560
Speaker 7: and be sure to click the Patreon tab to get

955
00:57:25,600 --> 00:57:29,920
Speaker 7: access to video content, bonuses, and our weekly

956
00:57:30,000 --> 00:57:33,840
Speaker 5: After show and before we meet again, repeat after me,

957
00:57:34,840 --> 00:57:37,280
Speaker 5: just because I can do it all doesn't mean I

958
00:57:37,320 --> 00:57:38,200
Speaker 5: have to do it all.