1 00:00:00,240 --> 00:00:07,840 Speaker 1: Hmm. Thirteen Days of Halloween Penance, a co production of 2 00:00:07,880 --> 00:00:11,640 Speaker 1: iHeart three D Audio Blumhouse Television and Grim and Mild 3 00:00:11,680 --> 00:00:16,120 Speaker 1: from Aaron Yankee. Headphones recommended Listener discretion advised. 4 00:00:32,400 --> 00:00:42,959 Speaker 2: Hm hmmm, well someone here soon as an expect. 5 00:00:44,000 --> 00:00:47,800 Speaker 3: No time to waste on the examination table. There prepper 6 00:00:47,960 --> 00:00:56,480 Speaker 3: for treatment? Oh where am I? 7 00:00:58,920 --> 00:00:59,400 Speaker 2: Where am I? 8 00:00:59,680 --> 00:00:59,920 Speaker 1: Doctor? 9 00:01:00,160 --> 00:01:00,680 Speaker 3: She's come to? 10 00:01:01,920 --> 00:01:02,840 Speaker 1: Why can't I move? 11 00:01:02,960 --> 00:01:05,840 Speaker 3: The application is already prepped? Am I in the hospital? 12 00:01:06,080 --> 00:01:08,839 Speaker 3: The clinical make a fist for me? Why am I restrained? 13 00:01:09,000 --> 00:01:11,040 Speaker 3: It's for your own safety, my safety. 14 00:01:11,920 --> 00:01:14,119 Speaker 2: You could hurt yourself or someone else. 15 00:01:14,280 --> 00:01:16,440 Speaker 3: Why would I do that? 16 00:01:16,440 --> 00:01:17,280 Speaker 1: That's the single dose? 17 00:01:17,360 --> 00:01:18,560 Speaker 3: What the fuck might be enough? 18 00:01:18,600 --> 00:01:19,840 Speaker 2: Why did you just inject me? 19 00:01:24,120 --> 00:01:30,320 Speaker 3: Huh? Why would you look at that? 20 00:01:31,880 --> 00:01:33,720 Speaker 2: I believe she's already responding. 21 00:01:34,360 --> 00:01:35,919 Speaker 3: Should it really be so fast acting? 22 00:01:36,280 --> 00:01:40,320 Speaker 4: She probably hasn't aiden, But this one, too is a 23 00:01:40,400 --> 00:01:41,440 Speaker 4: special case. 24 00:01:43,040 --> 00:01:51,360 Speaker 2: What's happening? Well, missus Rodrige, that's not my name, that's 25 00:01:51,440 --> 00:01:52,960 Speaker 2: not just remain coin. 26 00:01:53,840 --> 00:02:00,320 Speaker 4: Everything will be much easier if you are cold. 27 00:02:00,320 --> 00:02:05,000 Speaker 3: You give me tell me what are you seeing? What 28 00:02:05,200 --> 00:02:12,880 Speaker 3: are you here? I think it could be sick. 29 00:02:14,160 --> 00:02:15,360 Speaker 5: Maybe we gave her too much. 30 00:02:16,520 --> 00:02:18,120 Speaker 2: Well, no science is exact. 31 00:02:19,040 --> 00:02:19,920 Speaker 3: Let's give it a beat. 32 00:02:20,520 --> 00:02:24,400 Speaker 2: Seven, Gatherine, can you. 33 00:02:24,360 --> 00:02:30,920 Speaker 3: Talk her through it? What am I just relaxed? 34 00:02:30,919 --> 00:02:31,160 Speaker 6: Now? 35 00:02:32,000 --> 00:02:36,359 Speaker 2: Talk to Catherine right back to check on you. 36 00:02:38,360 --> 00:02:50,360 Speaker 4: Could you imagine should be scheduled next week? 37 00:02:59,280 --> 00:03:03,480 Speaker 3: First time? Where are you just the next bed over? 38 00:03:06,120 --> 00:03:14,919 Speaker 3: How does it feel strange? I can't seem to focus. Yes, 39 00:03:15,440 --> 00:03:19,320 Speaker 3: it does give one a bit of a tumble. Well, 40 00:03:20,160 --> 00:03:22,480 Speaker 3: if you can listen to my voice while the worst 41 00:03:22,520 --> 00:03:26,560 Speaker 3: of it passes, you'll be right asway against soon, though 42 00:03:26,639 --> 00:03:31,919 Speaker 3: I suppose I should warn you I'm spectacularly tedious. Listen 43 00:03:32,000 --> 00:03:34,360 Speaker 3: to me too long and you may end up quite 44 00:03:34,400 --> 00:03:41,800 Speaker 3: literally bored to death. Who are you, oh, Catherine Sherwin? 45 00:03:42,280 --> 00:03:46,080 Speaker 3: I'm a scholar of medieval theology. Sounds dreadful, doesn't it. 46 00:03:46,400 --> 00:03:48,640 Speaker 3: I write books that no one reads, about books that 47 00:03:48,720 --> 00:03:51,920 Speaker 3: no one has read. My specialty is since Anselm of 48 00:03:52,000 --> 00:04:00,880 Speaker 3: Canterbury and the ontological argument? You familiar um? And why 49 00:04:00,880 --> 00:04:04,040 Speaker 3: would you be? Anselm was a Catholic theologian of the 50 00:04:04,080 --> 00:04:08,600 Speaker 3: eleventh century, a thundering, black habited engineer of the Arcanetus 51 00:04:08,720 --> 00:04:13,160 Speaker 3: of God. Before he was my research subject, Anselm was 52 00:04:13,200 --> 00:04:16,920 Speaker 3: a homegrown obsession of my father's yes, Dad, It was 53 00:04:16,960 --> 00:04:20,200 Speaker 3: a bit of an amateur theologian himself. He spent so 54 00:04:20,320 --> 00:04:24,839 Speaker 3: many hours pouring over Anselm, Augustine and that whole spectral 55 00:04:24,960 --> 00:04:29,880 Speaker 3: faculty of god minded men from ages past. Of course, 56 00:04:29,920 --> 00:04:31,599 Speaker 3: when I was a girl, I had about as much 57 00:04:31,680 --> 00:04:33,479 Speaker 3: interest in all of that as I had in the 58 00:04:33,520 --> 00:04:38,440 Speaker 3: design of seward rains. But I suppose death does have 59 00:04:38,520 --> 00:04:42,800 Speaker 3: a way of rearranging one's engrossments. My father died when 60 00:04:42,839 --> 00:04:47,640 Speaker 3: I was in my first year at university. He was alone, 61 00:04:48,440 --> 00:04:52,000 Speaker 3: alone on one of his meditations, as he called them, 62 00:04:52,440 --> 00:04:55,960 Speaker 3: hiking the peak of a mountain in Scotland called khn Aran. 63 00:04:59,000 --> 00:05:02,080 Speaker 3: It was a heart attack, or so they assumed. But 64 00:05:02,160 --> 00:05:05,919 Speaker 3: would you guess this, He did make it to the top. 65 00:05:06,600 --> 00:05:09,799 Speaker 3: They found him there in the cold rocks, in the fog, 66 00:05:10,160 --> 00:05:14,440 Speaker 3: as high as the mountain goes. I always liked that 67 00:05:15,080 --> 00:05:18,159 Speaker 3: felled by his ambition, but he did make it all 68 00:05:18,279 --> 00:05:23,320 Speaker 3: the way up. After he was gone, I found myself 69 00:05:23,360 --> 00:05:25,919 Speaker 3: home for Christmas reading through the books and papers in 70 00:05:26,000 --> 00:05:30,159 Speaker 3: his study. One story from a book on his desk 71 00:05:30,240 --> 00:05:35,200 Speaker 3: that arrested my attention was about Saint Anselm's childhood. Apparently, 72 00:05:35,200 --> 00:05:37,919 Speaker 3: as a young boy Anselm had met face to face 73 00:05:39,000 --> 00:05:45,039 Speaker 3: with God himself, or so he said. The encounter took 74 00:05:45,080 --> 00:05:48,359 Speaker 3: place on top of a mountain called Beccadinona, near his 75 00:05:48,440 --> 00:05:52,560 Speaker 3: home town of Aosta in Italy. After the young Anselmo 76 00:05:52,640 --> 00:05:55,880 Speaker 3: climbed the cliffs and scrambled over the ice and rocks 77 00:05:55,880 --> 00:05:59,400 Speaker 3: to the summit, he was found by a wandering angel 78 00:06:00,080 --> 00:06:03,479 Speaker 3: and ushered into the secret mansion of the Lord, where 79 00:06:03,520 --> 00:06:07,160 Speaker 3: they welcomed him with a meal the bread of God. 80 00:06:10,640 --> 00:06:13,200 Speaker 3: Now when I read this, I couldn't help but wonder 81 00:06:13,279 --> 00:06:17,120 Speaker 3: if Daddy's solitary mountaintop journeys were all in the vain 82 00:06:17,200 --> 00:06:20,120 Speaker 3: hope that he would one day stumble into the garden 83 00:06:20,279 --> 00:06:23,640 Speaker 3: of a secret manner and be welcomed inside by a 84 00:06:23,680 --> 00:06:29,919 Speaker 3: seraphic majordomo and taste the bread of God himself. After 85 00:06:29,960 --> 00:06:33,599 Speaker 3: I uncovered this window into my father's obsession, I had 86 00:06:33,640 --> 00:06:36,880 Speaker 3: to learn more about Anselm. It was in this that 87 00:06:36,960 --> 00:06:40,240 Speaker 3: I first crossed paths with my life's work and Saint 88 00:06:40,320 --> 00:06:46,040 Speaker 3: Anselm's most favorite invention, the ontological argument for the existence 89 00:06:46,279 --> 00:06:50,719 Speaker 3: of God. Are you ready for me to prove it 90 00:06:50,760 --> 00:06:58,920 Speaker 3: to you? The existence of God? Anselm says, if God exists. 91 00:06:59,160 --> 00:07:03,679 Speaker 3: He is the great conceivable being. No being greater could 92 00:07:03,680 --> 00:07:08,559 Speaker 3: be imagined. Now, I ask, would the greatest conceivable being 93 00:07:08,680 --> 00:07:12,280 Speaker 3: be greater if it existed only in your mind? Or 94 00:07:12,320 --> 00:07:15,120 Speaker 3: if it existed both in your mind and in reality. 95 00:07:16,120 --> 00:07:19,120 Speaker 3: Surely if the being were real, it would be greater 96 00:07:19,520 --> 00:07:23,360 Speaker 3: than if it were only imaginary. Therefore, the imaginary one 97 00:07:23,680 --> 00:07:28,120 Speaker 3: is not the greatest. The real one is. Therefore, by definition, 98 00:07:28,280 --> 00:07:33,480 Speaker 3: the greatest conceivable being must and does exist, not just 99 00:07:33,560 --> 00:07:41,480 Speaker 3: in here but out there. Ah, I take it, you're 100 00:07:41,520 --> 00:07:45,960 Speaker 3: not convinced. Some say the same form can be used 101 00:07:46,000 --> 00:07:48,640 Speaker 3: to prove the existence of any silly thing, the most 102 00:07:48,640 --> 00:07:54,080 Speaker 3: perfect island or the most perfect cup of laps and tea. 103 00:07:54,640 --> 00:07:59,000 Speaker 3: But that first night, when I read the proof, I 104 00:07:59,120 --> 00:08:02,520 Speaker 3: was flawed. It was late in the evening, and I 105 00:08:02,640 --> 00:08:06,760 Speaker 3: was alone in his study, and everything was quiet except 106 00:08:06,760 --> 00:08:09,800 Speaker 3: for the crackle of snow falling outside the window. I 107 00:08:09,840 --> 00:08:12,880 Speaker 3: walked out into the night and let the snow fall 108 00:08:12,960 --> 00:08:17,240 Speaker 3: on my face and melt on my skin. Every sensation 109 00:08:17,560 --> 00:08:21,560 Speaker 3: was rapturous. The air around me was bursting with the 110 00:08:21,680 --> 00:08:27,560 Speaker 3: life force of the presence previously unknown. I knew there 111 00:08:27,800 --> 00:08:32,720 Speaker 3: was a God. I had absolute proof, and that knowledge 112 00:08:33,400 --> 00:08:41,040 Speaker 3: meant I would one day see my father again. I 113 00:08:41,080 --> 00:08:45,120 Speaker 3: slept fitfully that night, dreaming about strange clouds that gathered 114 00:08:45,200 --> 00:08:48,400 Speaker 3: round a mountain top. When I woke in the morning, 115 00:08:48,440 --> 00:08:51,319 Speaker 3: I ran to my father's study and read the ontological 116 00:08:51,440 --> 00:08:58,240 Speaker 3: argument again. But something was wrong. The words were the same, 117 00:08:58,480 --> 00:09:01,120 Speaker 3: but they lacked the force of certainty they had the 118 00:09:01,240 --> 00:09:05,840 Speaker 3: night previous. To my horror, I was no longer persuaded. 119 00:09:06,520 --> 00:09:09,960 Speaker 3: Instead of absolute proof, I was left with a humiliating 120 00:09:10,080 --> 00:09:13,720 Speaker 3: sense of the hollowness of it all, like the whole 121 00:09:13,760 --> 00:09:16,480 Speaker 3: thing had been a mere word game, some kind of 122 00:09:16,880 --> 00:09:20,560 Speaker 3: clever trick of grammar. I couldn't say what was wrong 123 00:09:20,600 --> 00:09:24,439 Speaker 3: with Anselm's argument, but it just didn't feel right at all. 124 00:09:27,559 --> 00:09:32,280 Speaker 3: And that's where I stayed. For thirty years. I became 125 00:09:32,320 --> 00:09:36,440 Speaker 3: a scholar of Saint Anselm. I under a professorship at Oxford, married, 126 00:09:36,520 --> 00:09:39,640 Speaker 3: had children, sent them off to university to foster their 127 00:09:39,679 --> 00:09:43,520 Speaker 3: own obsessions. I wrote several books about Anselm, dozens of 128 00:09:43,600 --> 00:09:47,920 Speaker 3: articles on the subject of the ontological argument, its modern proponents, 129 00:09:47,960 --> 00:09:52,240 Speaker 3: and so on and so on, bloody blaody blah. But 130 00:09:52,320 --> 00:09:54,920 Speaker 3: as many in my profession know, though they dare not 131 00:09:55,080 --> 00:10:00,920 Speaker 3: confess expertise has diminishing returns. In all all those years 132 00:10:01,120 --> 00:10:06,160 Speaker 3: and through all that study, I never once again found 133 00:10:06,200 --> 00:10:09,640 Speaker 3: what I was searching for that moment that night, where 134 00:10:09,679 --> 00:10:13,880 Speaker 3: I knew in my bones the ontological argument was sound, 135 00:10:14,400 --> 00:10:23,480 Speaker 3: and I knew he orri it was out there. This 136 00:10:23,600 --> 00:10:27,760 Speaker 3: rather boring life of flapping dust jackets and compiling endnotes 137 00:10:27,880 --> 00:10:31,840 Speaker 3: went on until one day, at an academic conference, I 138 00:10:31,960 --> 00:10:37,120 Speaker 3: was approached by another professor, not of theology or medieval studies, 139 00:10:37,160 --> 00:10:42,640 Speaker 3: but of biochemistry. I'd just given a presentation on modern 140 00:10:42,720 --> 00:10:46,480 Speaker 3: challenges on the ontological argument, and she met me afterwards 141 00:10:46,520 --> 00:10:48,280 Speaker 3: to see if I would like to chat over a 142 00:10:48,280 --> 00:10:53,840 Speaker 3: cup of tea. Her name was Professor Raymond. She was 143 00:10:53,920 --> 00:10:58,240 Speaker 3: a dashing woman with long black hair and livid eyes, 144 00:10:58,720 --> 00:11:03,400 Speaker 3: and her attention was dangerously exciting. I could hardly say no. 145 00:11:06,600 --> 00:11:10,400 Speaker 3: Raymard led me to a secluded corner in the college's library. 146 00:11:11,080 --> 00:11:13,880 Speaker 3: Once we were snuggled away in our little den, to 147 00:11:14,000 --> 00:11:17,800 Speaker 3: my astonishment, she narrated that she had one night long 148 00:11:17,840 --> 00:11:23,040 Speaker 3: ago become absolutely convinced that the ontological argument had force, 149 00:11:23,440 --> 00:11:26,600 Speaker 3: only to find upon waking the next morning that she 150 00:11:26,800 --> 00:11:30,520 Speaker 3: was once again doubtful. But she had never been able 151 00:11:30,559 --> 00:11:35,000 Speaker 3: to shake the memory of the Catharsis, the almost psychedelic 152 00:11:35,200 --> 00:11:39,160 Speaker 3: arising to a second substance of life that came from 153 00:11:39,200 --> 00:11:46,440 Speaker 3: that one night when it seemed true. Since then, she 154 00:11:46,440 --> 00:11:49,160 Speaker 3: had thought about the argument every day, but with a 155 00:11:49,200 --> 00:11:52,880 Speaker 3: different sort of lens than I had. Raymond asked me, 156 00:11:53,920 --> 00:11:54,640 Speaker 3: suppose that. 157 00:11:54,600 --> 00:11:58,120 Speaker 6: The argument is at bottom correct, and that it does 158 00:11:58,280 --> 00:12:02,600 Speaker 6: prove the greatest conceivable being must exist in reality out there? 159 00:12:03,280 --> 00:12:06,160 Speaker 6: Why are we so quick to assume we know what 160 00:12:06,240 --> 00:12:10,240 Speaker 6: the other qualities of the greatest conceivable being are? Might 161 00:12:10,320 --> 00:12:14,079 Speaker 6: not our idea of greatness be an illusion, a biological 162 00:12:14,240 --> 00:12:19,440 Speaker 6: contingency based on our ancestral environment. For example, we believe 163 00:12:19,480 --> 00:12:22,679 Speaker 6: the greatest conceivable being to be the biggest because it 164 00:12:22,760 --> 00:12:26,440 Speaker 6: is cooked into our animal brains that bigger beasts win 165 00:12:26,720 --> 00:12:31,120 Speaker 6: over smaller ones in a fight. But sweet aside the 166 00:12:31,160 --> 00:12:35,880 Speaker 6: preferences of generous Homo sapiens and ask, from the perspective of, say, 167 00:12:36,679 --> 00:12:41,080 Speaker 6: an atom of hydrogen, what are the qualities of the 168 00:12:41,120 --> 00:12:48,000 Speaker 6: greatest conceivable being? Might bound cell be proving the existence 169 00:12:48,080 --> 00:12:51,560 Speaker 6: of a different kind of being altogether? And if so, 170 00:12:52,280 --> 00:12:55,959 Speaker 6: what are those qualities that are the greatest as conceivable 171 00:12:56,040 --> 00:12:59,920 Speaker 6: by the universe, the true superlatives, if you will. 172 00:13:02,720 --> 00:13:07,240 Speaker 3: This stirred something both thrilling and frightening in me. I 173 00:13:07,320 --> 00:13:10,080 Speaker 3: remembered for the first time in years, the dream I 174 00:13:10,120 --> 00:13:15,200 Speaker 3: had about the clouds round the mountain top. Anyway, Raymond 175 00:13:15,240 --> 00:13:18,360 Speaker 3: had a theory about our mutual obsession with Anselm's argument 176 00:13:19,080 --> 00:13:23,760 Speaker 3: that to truly grasp the proof through ontology requires not 177 00:13:24,040 --> 00:13:29,880 Speaker 3: just an intellectual understanding, but an experience. To use the 178 00:13:29,960 --> 00:13:33,720 Speaker 3: analogy of an alien life form from the burning, sulfurous planet, 179 00:13:34,080 --> 00:13:39,400 Speaker 3: who could never understand the wetness of water, no matter 180 00:13:39,400 --> 00:13:41,880 Speaker 3: how many papers it read on the chemical properties of 181 00:13:42,000 --> 00:13:45,320 Speaker 3: H two O. The wetness must be seen with the eyes, 182 00:13:45,480 --> 00:13:49,360 Speaker 3: and felt with the skin, and tasted with the tongue. 183 00:13:49,559 --> 00:13:53,280 Speaker 3: And whom you've had the experience of a damp cloth 184 00:13:53,360 --> 00:13:57,400 Speaker 3: wrung out and dripping on your toes, you don't understand 185 00:13:57,559 --> 00:14:04,080 Speaker 3: what water is. After all, didn't Anselm himself taste of 186 00:14:04,160 --> 00:14:07,880 Speaker 3: the bread of God. This seemed true enough to me. 187 00:14:08,480 --> 00:14:11,760 Speaker 3: I'd spent years trying to recreate the experience of that 188 00:14:11,920 --> 00:14:15,080 Speaker 3: night in my father's study, and I didn't know anything 189 00:14:15,240 --> 00:14:23,400 Speaker 3: that could conjure it again. Well, she did, Remard had 190 00:14:23,520 --> 00:14:27,640 Speaker 3: in her laboratory happened to isolate a compound called seven 191 00:14:27,800 --> 00:14:33,560 Speaker 3: methyl ionamine. This molecule was an enzymatic byproduct of a 192 00:14:33,600 --> 00:14:37,040 Speaker 3: species of alpine lichen that grew on rocks above the 193 00:14:37,080 --> 00:14:40,880 Speaker 3: tree line in certain mountain ranges. It just so happened. 194 00:14:40,920 --> 00:14:44,240 Speaker 3: She noticed that this molecule was similar in structure to 195 00:14:44,320 --> 00:14:48,200 Speaker 3: a number of other molecules that are known as ensogens, 196 00:14:49,320 --> 00:14:53,480 Speaker 3: those used in religious ceremonies to bring messages from the gods. 197 00:14:54,160 --> 00:14:56,360 Speaker 3: She said that she had, on more than one occasion 198 00:14:56,400 --> 00:15:00,280 Speaker 3: happened to ingest a significant amount of this compound, and 199 00:15:00,400 --> 00:15:04,400 Speaker 3: she believed it had given her profound insights into the 200 00:15:04,480 --> 00:15:11,840 Speaker 3: ontological argument and the being to which it pointed naturally. 201 00:15:11,880 --> 00:15:15,120 Speaker 3: I asked what these insights were. She said that they 202 00:15:15,160 --> 00:15:17,880 Speaker 3: were difficult to put into words. She said, I would 203 00:15:17,880 --> 00:15:21,200 Speaker 3: need to see for myself. I would need to wring 204 00:15:21,640 --> 00:15:26,080 Speaker 3: the cloth to understand what it meant for water to 205 00:15:26,120 --> 00:15:32,960 Speaker 3: be wet. So I took what she offered me. It 206 00:15:33,080 --> 00:15:36,520 Speaker 3: was a white powder in a small plastic bag. She 207 00:15:36,560 --> 00:15:39,360 Speaker 3: gave me a dosy'ch advisory said she'd be in touch. 208 00:15:41,840 --> 00:15:45,120 Speaker 3: I mulled over it for a while. I'd never taken 209 00:15:45,200 --> 00:15:47,480 Speaker 3: drugs of any sort, not even a puff of grass. 210 00:15:47,520 --> 00:15:50,960 Speaker 3: In my school years, I only drank wine at Christmas time, 211 00:15:51,080 --> 00:15:55,320 Speaker 3: but I felt I owed it to myself, or perhaps 212 00:15:55,360 --> 00:16:01,680 Speaker 3: to Daddy, to understand what Raymard was hinting at. It 213 00:16:01,720 --> 00:16:04,200 Speaker 3: was a night my husband was away on some silly 214 00:16:04,240 --> 00:16:07,400 Speaker 3: mission of his, collecting fossils in Devon or some such 215 00:16:07,920 --> 00:16:11,640 Speaker 3: so I had the house to myself. I dipped candles. 216 00:16:12,360 --> 00:16:16,480 Speaker 3: Isn't that humorous? Why did I like candles? It just 217 00:16:17,040 --> 00:16:19,920 Speaker 3: seemed the thing to do. But I only had half 218 00:16:19,920 --> 00:16:22,920 Speaker 3: a dozen or so in the house. So there they were, 219 00:16:23,120 --> 00:16:25,840 Speaker 3: my six candles, melting on the sofa table while I 220 00:16:25,920 --> 00:16:33,040 Speaker 3: waited for the drug to take effect. I didn't know 221 00:16:33,040 --> 00:16:36,240 Speaker 3: what to expect, and for a long time nothing happened. 222 00:16:38,360 --> 00:16:40,640 Speaker 3: I rubbed my toes on the carpet and took deep 223 00:16:40,680 --> 00:16:46,880 Speaker 3: breaths and waited to feel something. I confess after some 224 00:16:47,080 --> 00:16:49,880 Speaker 3: time I grew rather bored. I began to wonder if 225 00:16:49,920 --> 00:16:53,160 Speaker 3: the powder had lost its potency, or if Reymard had 226 00:16:53,160 --> 00:16:56,240 Speaker 3: been pulling some kind of prank. For a while, I 227 00:16:56,320 --> 00:16:59,320 Speaker 3: became convinced this must be the case, and that I 228 00:16:59,400 --> 00:17:03,280 Speaker 3: had just swallowed several grams of baby powder dissolved in 229 00:17:03,320 --> 00:17:06,560 Speaker 3: a cup of tea. I was so embarrassed, What a 230 00:17:06,600 --> 00:17:11,560 Speaker 3: stupid thing to even try. But then, while I was 231 00:17:11,600 --> 00:17:15,520 Speaker 3: sitting there, feeling sorry for myself, I witnessed something quite 232 00:17:15,600 --> 00:17:19,320 Speaker 3: strange in my border. I'd flicked on the television, which 233 00:17:19,440 --> 00:17:22,600 Speaker 3: was showing a football match, but at some point, without 234 00:17:22,640 --> 00:17:27,880 Speaker 3: me noticing, everyone had stopped playing. No one was running 235 00:17:28,000 --> 00:17:31,320 Speaker 3: or kicking, no line up for a penalty, and they 236 00:17:31,359 --> 00:17:34,520 Speaker 3: weren't leaving the pitch either. They were just standing there, 237 00:17:34,960 --> 00:17:38,679 Speaker 3: all of them, stock still on the green. The crowd 238 00:17:38,720 --> 00:17:43,000 Speaker 3: in the stands had fallen silent, and one by one 239 00:17:43,040 --> 00:17:46,600 Speaker 3: all of the players began looking up up into the 240 00:17:46,720 --> 00:17:51,320 Speaker 3: sky at what. I had no idea. I suppose at 241 00:17:51,359 --> 00:17:56,040 Speaker 3: the camera hovering over the pitch, because our eyes met. 242 00:17:57,000 --> 00:18:00,280 Speaker 3: I was looking at them, and they were looking to me. 243 00:18:01,600 --> 00:18:05,440 Speaker 3: No one moved. For what seemed like ages, they gazed 244 00:18:05,520 --> 00:18:09,159 Speaker 3: into my eyes. I said to myself, now that is 245 00:18:09,320 --> 00:18:13,399 Speaker 3: rather odd. Then one of the football announcers answered me. 246 00:18:13,480 --> 00:18:19,280 Speaker 3: He said, scarcely ever happens. And I said, what makes 247 00:18:19,359 --> 00:18:22,320 Speaker 3: them do that? And the man at the microphone said, 248 00:18:22,960 --> 00:18:27,119 Speaker 3: they're showing respect for the arrival of an important guest. 249 00:18:28,560 --> 00:18:32,600 Speaker 3: I said, well, I suppose I'm flattered, and he said, 250 00:18:32,880 --> 00:18:39,000 Speaker 3: I'm not talking about you. The hare stood up on 251 00:18:39,040 --> 00:18:41,919 Speaker 3: the back of my neck. I felt jets of cold 252 00:18:42,000 --> 00:18:45,800 Speaker 3: water rushing over my bones. I swirled round to look 253 00:18:45,880 --> 00:18:50,440 Speaker 3: behind me, but saw nothing except the blank wall. However, 254 00:18:50,600 --> 00:18:54,679 Speaker 3: I knew there was someone in the house with me. 255 00:18:56,000 --> 00:18:59,600 Speaker 3: I didn't know who it was. I said, I'm afraid, 256 00:19:01,200 --> 00:19:04,640 Speaker 3: but the announcer wouldn't reply again. The football players all 257 00:19:04,640 --> 00:19:07,919 Speaker 3: stood there, looking right at me, not smiling, saying nothing, 258 00:19:08,200 --> 00:19:14,480 Speaker 3: just watching what I was going to do. Suddenly, they 259 00:19:14,600 --> 00:19:18,119 Speaker 3: all raised their arms and pointed upward to the sky. 260 00:19:21,000 --> 00:19:24,479 Speaker 3: Without warning, the telly switched off. Then all the lights 261 00:19:24,520 --> 00:19:28,639 Speaker 3: began to grow dim. The lamp bulbs faded to gray, 262 00:19:28,960 --> 00:19:32,119 Speaker 3: and even the flames on my half dozen candles shrunk 263 00:19:32,200 --> 00:19:38,200 Speaker 3: down to mruborn pinpricks of light. I stood and they 264 00:19:38,240 --> 00:19:42,040 Speaker 3: all snuffed out completely. The only light left was what 265 00:19:42,119 --> 00:19:47,240 Speaker 3: I could see up the staircase from the second story. 266 00:19:47,400 --> 00:19:50,920 Speaker 3: It was as if the tide of darkness were rising 267 00:19:51,000 --> 00:19:58,520 Speaker 3: through the house. In that darkness, there were things. I 268 00:19:58,560 --> 00:20:02,200 Speaker 3: could hear them, soft squeaks and shuffling on the wood 269 00:20:02,240 --> 00:20:05,600 Speaker 3: of the floor, like little infants crawling towards me to play, 270 00:20:05,720 --> 00:20:12,440 Speaker 3: But without laughter or even breath, I lunged for the 271 00:20:12,520 --> 00:20:15,160 Speaker 3: staircase and climbed it into the safety of the light. 272 00:20:15,560 --> 00:20:17,920 Speaker 3: But no sooner had I come into the upper hall 273 00:20:18,160 --> 00:20:22,119 Speaker 3: than the lamps there began to fade as well. The 274 00:20:22,200 --> 00:20:26,040 Speaker 3: dark flood was rising evermore, driving me up and up. 275 00:20:26,880 --> 00:20:29,640 Speaker 3: I heard the crawling of the creatures. Now upon the stairs, 276 00:20:30,359 --> 00:20:33,639 Speaker 3: How could I go any higher? Then I looked to 277 00:20:33,760 --> 00:20:37,200 Speaker 3: the ceiling and saw, yes, in the little crack around 278 00:20:37,200 --> 00:20:38,919 Speaker 3: the door to the loft, there was a glow of 279 00:20:39,040 --> 00:20:43,480 Speaker 3: yellow light. I snatched the chain, leave it down the door, 280 00:20:43,680 --> 00:20:46,080 Speaker 3: and scurried off the ladder as fast as I could. 281 00:20:54,160 --> 00:20:56,440 Speaker 3: The loft was lit with a single yellow light bulb. 282 00:20:57,160 --> 00:21:01,320 Speaker 3: The shadows were throbbing, and there in the just within 283 00:21:01,440 --> 00:21:06,520 Speaker 3: reach of the light, there it was the stack of 284 00:21:06,720 --> 00:21:12,359 Speaker 3: things from Daddy's office. I tore open the boxes and 285 00:21:12,400 --> 00:21:16,359 Speaker 3: began paging moniately through the papers inside. These were not 286 00:21:16,440 --> 00:21:19,400 Speaker 3: my father's books, which were now part of my own library, 287 00:21:19,560 --> 00:21:23,600 Speaker 3: but his notes and his diaries. I blazed through the pages, 288 00:21:23,640 --> 00:21:26,000 Speaker 3: searching for something that would make sense of it all. 289 00:21:26,480 --> 00:21:29,199 Speaker 3: I said out loud, what is it you want to 290 00:21:29,280 --> 00:21:36,640 Speaker 3: show me? And Then a voice, speaking from a darkened 291 00:21:36,680 --> 00:21:46,719 Speaker 3: corner of the loft whispered, what shood dear. At that moment, 292 00:21:47,119 --> 00:21:49,919 Speaker 3: the tattered notebook in my hand fell open to a 293 00:21:50,000 --> 00:21:53,119 Speaker 3: page where my father had made a long diary entry 294 00:21:53,480 --> 00:21:57,280 Speaker 3: about plans for one of his meditations, a mountain hike 295 00:21:57,440 --> 00:22:02,200 Speaker 3: at Ben Lower's. He noted his transportation, his packing list, 296 00:22:02,320 --> 00:22:04,919 Speaker 3: the books he would take with him, et cetera, et cetera. 297 00:22:06,280 --> 00:22:09,760 Speaker 3: But after his return from the mountain, the entry was 298 00:22:09,840 --> 00:22:14,400 Speaker 3: only two words, written with such force his pen had 299 00:22:14,560 --> 00:22:25,760 Speaker 3: cut through the page. It said most ancient. After this, 300 00:22:25,920 --> 00:22:29,119 Speaker 3: I have very little memory of that night. I know 301 00:22:29,280 --> 00:22:32,119 Speaker 3: there was something else. The man in my house told 302 00:22:32,160 --> 00:22:36,960 Speaker 3: me something important, but I couldn't recall beyond that, only 303 00:22:37,000 --> 00:22:40,800 Speaker 3: faint sensations of fibers, like soft hair brushing against my 304 00:22:40,960 --> 00:23:27,760 Speaker 3: skin and hearing a melody ah. When I woke the 305 00:23:27,800 --> 00:23:30,960 Speaker 3: next morning, I was in a rather strange position, blank 306 00:23:31,000 --> 00:23:33,520 Speaker 3: curled on the floor of my son's bedroom, with a 307 00:23:33,720 --> 00:23:36,639 Speaker 3: vague sense of discomfort in my mouth and a taste 308 00:23:36,640 --> 00:23:41,239 Speaker 3: of salt on my tongue. When I went to wash up, 309 00:23:41,320 --> 00:23:43,680 Speaker 3: I discovered the source of the taste in my mouth, 310 00:23:44,080 --> 00:23:47,000 Speaker 3: which was an unexpected gap in the molars on the 311 00:23:47,000 --> 00:23:50,359 Speaker 3: lower left side of my jaw. I searched around the 312 00:23:50,359 --> 00:23:54,159 Speaker 3: house for the missing tooth to no avail, but no 313 00:23:54,240 --> 00:23:57,320 Speaker 3: sense wailing about a lost tooth. Here and there. I 314 00:23:57,520 --> 00:24:01,840 Speaker 3: was exhilarated about what had been revealed to me, the 315 00:24:02,480 --> 00:24:08,440 Speaker 3: most Ancient. I tried to call Raymond on the telephone 316 00:24:08,440 --> 00:24:12,520 Speaker 3: that very morning. Could it be that most Ancient was 317 00:24:12,520 --> 00:24:16,920 Speaker 3: one of her true superlatives? Had I and Daddy before 318 00:24:16,960 --> 00:24:20,480 Speaker 3: me somehow discovered one of the objective properties of the 319 00:24:20,480 --> 00:24:25,479 Speaker 3: greatest conceivable being. It's hard to express how true and 320 00:24:25,640 --> 00:24:30,280 Speaker 3: how important this discovery felt. I was tingling all over, 321 00:24:32,080 --> 00:24:35,880 Speaker 3: but alas Raymond's telephone rang and rang and rang without answers, 322 00:24:35,920 --> 00:24:41,000 Speaker 3: so I couldn't share what I'd found. It was, I 323 00:24:41,000 --> 00:24:45,960 Speaker 3: think the loneliest I had ever been ah, but I 324 00:24:46,080 --> 00:24:49,359 Speaker 3: was ravenous to learn more. A few nights later, I 325 00:24:49,440 --> 00:24:52,680 Speaker 3: fabricated a story to feed my husband about an overnight 326 00:24:52,720 --> 00:24:56,720 Speaker 3: trip to visit relatives on my side. Instead, I set 327 00:24:56,720 --> 00:25:00,160 Speaker 3: out to have another meeting with the presents. This time, 328 00:25:00,280 --> 00:25:03,000 Speaker 3: I wanted to learn as much as I possibly could, 329 00:25:03,320 --> 00:25:06,879 Speaker 3: so I ignored Raymard's dosage instructions and took the rest 330 00:25:07,000 --> 00:25:14,159 Speaker 3: of what she had given me. In one go, I 331 00:25:14,240 --> 00:25:16,439 Speaker 3: had landed at the ruins of an abbey in the 332 00:25:16,440 --> 00:25:19,800 Speaker 3: East Country, thinking this setting would aid in perceiving the 333 00:25:19,880 --> 00:25:23,800 Speaker 3: qualities of Anselm's God. Of course, I had to do 334 00:25:23,840 --> 00:25:26,240 Speaker 3: a bit of fence jumping, since the grounds were closed 335 00:25:26,240 --> 00:25:30,080 Speaker 3: to tourists after sunset, but I didn't think much of it. 336 00:25:30,480 --> 00:25:32,760 Speaker 3: Little was left but a broken wall on the southern 337 00:25:32,840 --> 00:25:36,080 Speaker 3: face and a row of stone archways, all of it 338 00:25:36,119 --> 00:25:38,480 Speaker 3: now covered in moss so green it seemed to glow 339 00:25:38,480 --> 00:25:44,760 Speaker 3: in the dark. I took the powder and waited, writing 340 00:25:44,800 --> 00:25:47,240 Speaker 3: meanwhile in my journal, which I had brought along so 341 00:25:47,320 --> 00:25:52,879 Speaker 3: I could record my experience despite my previous encounter. It 342 00:25:52,920 --> 00:25:55,919 Speaker 3: took long enough that I began to wonder, if you 343 00:25:56,000 --> 00:25:57,800 Speaker 3: may laugh at me for this, But so be it. 344 00:25:58,480 --> 00:26:02,040 Speaker 3: I wondered if it had ever done anything in the 345 00:26:02,080 --> 00:26:05,200 Speaker 3: first place, and the source of my previous experience had 346 00:26:05,200 --> 00:26:08,600 Speaker 3: been nothing but my own mind, perhaps in the effort 347 00:26:08,680 --> 00:26:14,200 Speaker 3: of arriving at some form of madness. Oh but as 348 00:26:14,240 --> 00:26:17,679 Speaker 3: I put all this down to paper, I began to 349 00:26:17,720 --> 00:26:27,280 Speaker 3: hear voices singing a quiet melody that was unlike any 350 00:26:27,400 --> 00:26:30,919 Speaker 3: chance I'd ever heard before. I tried to sing along, 351 00:26:45,359 --> 00:26:53,480 Speaker 3: and then I was somewhere else. Entirely the abbey was gone. 352 00:26:54,320 --> 00:26:58,399 Speaker 3: I was floating up, as if clutching to a trail 353 00:26:58,520 --> 00:27:04,720 Speaker 3: of steam rising in the sky. But I wasn't simply 354 00:27:04,840 --> 00:27:11,239 Speaker 3: rising up. I was rising backwards, backwards in time. I 355 00:27:11,280 --> 00:27:15,960 Speaker 3: saw the earth below my feet, with civilization retreating, every 356 00:27:16,040 --> 00:27:19,320 Speaker 3: road fading to grass, and then grass fading to stone, 357 00:27:19,359 --> 00:27:22,480 Speaker 3: and then stone to icy waters, and then icy waters 358 00:27:22,520 --> 00:27:28,680 Speaker 3: to entrails of flame, a landscape of illimitable, writhing worms 359 00:27:28,720 --> 00:27:35,520 Speaker 3: made of molten rock. The earth glowed like a forge, 360 00:27:35,760 --> 00:27:42,720 Speaker 3: and I was silent. And then he was there with me, 361 00:27:43,840 --> 00:27:48,320 Speaker 3: the presence from the shadows in my loft, the one 362 00:27:48,320 --> 00:27:52,080 Speaker 3: who would show me the way. I asked him, Are 363 00:27:52,119 --> 00:27:55,920 Speaker 3: you going to welcome me into the mansion of God? 364 00:27:56,640 --> 00:28:07,159 Speaker 3: The voice said, The sterile earth burned below us. I 365 00:28:07,240 --> 00:28:14,439 Speaker 3: asked what we were looking at? He said rest. I 366 00:28:14,480 --> 00:28:18,159 Speaker 3: gathered my wits and remembered why I had come. I 367 00:28:18,240 --> 00:28:22,720 Speaker 3: asked him of the ontological argument. I asked him what 368 00:28:22,920 --> 00:28:25,840 Speaker 3: it was I had understood the night in my father's 369 00:28:25,840 --> 00:28:31,200 Speaker 3: study that I could no longer see now, And damn 370 00:28:31,200 --> 00:28:33,360 Speaker 3: it to hill as I tell it, I can't explain 371 00:28:33,440 --> 00:28:36,639 Speaker 3: precisely what he said. He did whisper something to me 372 00:28:37,160 --> 00:28:40,720 Speaker 3: from just behind my ears, so that I could feel 373 00:28:40,720 --> 00:28:47,440 Speaker 3: his breadth through my hair, something so so not words, 374 00:28:47,480 --> 00:28:52,280 Speaker 3: more like a melody, a melody that somehow in itself 375 00:28:52,400 --> 00:28:56,160 Speaker 3: carried a logic. And I knew. I knew in some 376 00:28:56,520 --> 00:29:01,200 Speaker 3: sense it contained a hidden premise that made the ontological 377 00:29:01,400 --> 00:29:06,760 Speaker 3: argument irrefuteable. I could almost put it into words. It 378 00:29:06,840 --> 00:29:10,240 Speaker 3: was right behind the veil in the back of my mind. 379 00:29:10,840 --> 00:29:13,160 Speaker 3: How I failed around for my notebook so I would 380 00:29:13,160 --> 00:29:15,040 Speaker 3: be ready to write it down as soon as I 381 00:29:15,080 --> 00:29:18,520 Speaker 3: worked it out. But then then below, as the earth 382 00:29:18,560 --> 00:29:23,000 Speaker 3: opened its mouth a chasm of unimaginable heat and darkness, 383 00:29:24,240 --> 00:29:38,480 Speaker 3: I asked, Must I go in there? He whispered. A 384 00:29:38,640 --> 00:29:42,760 Speaker 3: change came over me, the beginning of an unfolding of 385 00:29:42,840 --> 00:29:49,280 Speaker 3: sensation into impossible dimensions of strangeness and understanding and pain, 386 00:29:49,880 --> 00:29:57,640 Speaker 3: thought without meaning, sight without light. There was an infinite more, 387 00:29:57,760 --> 00:30:05,400 Speaker 3: but I could not remember it. I came to the 388 00:30:05,440 --> 00:30:09,360 Speaker 3: next morning with a policeman gruptly shaking me awake. Had 389 00:30:09,400 --> 00:30:11,160 Speaker 3: slept in the grass at the crest of the hill, 390 00:30:11,280 --> 00:30:14,240 Speaker 3: somewhere beyond the abbey. I dealt with the policeman quickly 391 00:30:14,240 --> 00:30:19,640 Speaker 3: as I could, and darted off to my car leave me. 392 00:30:19,680 --> 00:30:24,400 Speaker 3: Through the pages of my journal, I'd left several indecipherable illustrations, 393 00:30:24,800 --> 00:30:27,480 Speaker 3: along with scribbled notes from the part of the night 394 00:30:27,680 --> 00:30:32,840 Speaker 3: I could not recall. One note said the terrible Angel 395 00:30:33,440 --> 00:30:38,640 Speaker 3: the Majordomo. Another said the bread of God. It is 396 00:30:38,800 --> 00:30:44,920 Speaker 3: of God, but it is not bread. And finally, at 397 00:30:44,920 --> 00:30:47,680 Speaker 3: the end of my notes I had written with such 398 00:30:47,840 --> 00:30:53,680 Speaker 3: force that my pen tore through the pages most secret. 399 00:30:55,440 --> 00:30:58,719 Speaker 3: Upon reading this, my heart raised, Could this be another 400 00:30:58,800 --> 00:31:04,200 Speaker 3: of the true superlityis of the greatest conceivable being? It 401 00:31:04,280 --> 00:31:07,440 Speaker 3: must be, Though it made less sense than the last. 402 00:31:08,120 --> 00:31:11,320 Speaker 3: It was hard to reconcile the evangelical message of Christ 403 00:31:11,600 --> 00:31:15,160 Speaker 3: with the idea that God's greatness could be a secret. 404 00:31:15,960 --> 00:31:19,560 Speaker 3: But nevertheless I knew this insight had to be correct. 405 00:31:20,560 --> 00:31:24,360 Speaker 3: I would make sense of it somehow next time I 406 00:31:24,400 --> 00:31:31,320 Speaker 3: would understand. In this excitement, I knew immediately I had 407 00:31:31,320 --> 00:31:34,760 Speaker 3: to get more of the powder. I called and called 408 00:31:34,760 --> 00:31:38,760 Speaker 3: for Professor Raymond dozens of times, but you never answered 409 00:31:38,760 --> 00:31:42,760 Speaker 3: the telephone. Eventually, I became so desperate I booked a 410 00:31:42,760 --> 00:31:47,640 Speaker 3: plane ticket and made my way to her university. After 411 00:31:47,680 --> 00:31:50,480 Speaker 3: a bit of asking around, I came to the correct building. 412 00:31:53,560 --> 00:31:57,400 Speaker 3: I found her office locked, with parcels overflowing her mailbox. 413 00:31:58,120 --> 00:32:00,000 Speaker 3: So I went to the office next door, where I 414 00:32:00,080 --> 00:32:03,240 Speaker 3: met a small, timid looking man, framed with a bald 415 00:32:03,320 --> 00:32:06,800 Speaker 3: head and neatly trimmed beard. He was friendly at first, 416 00:32:07,160 --> 00:32:09,800 Speaker 3: asked if I needed help. I told him I was 417 00:32:09,800 --> 00:32:12,760 Speaker 3: looking for Raymond. He said that she'd recently gone on 418 00:32:12,800 --> 00:32:15,480 Speaker 3: sabbatical and he didn't know when she would be back. 419 00:32:16,040 --> 00:32:19,200 Speaker 3: He asked who I was. I said I was a 420 00:32:19,600 --> 00:32:23,960 Speaker 3: research partner, and that we were considering authoring a book 421 00:32:24,120 --> 00:32:28,680 Speaker 3: chapter together. The little man frowned. My deception must have 422 00:32:28,720 --> 00:32:32,520 Speaker 3: been rather obvious and really not good at lying. He 423 00:32:32,600 --> 00:32:35,560 Speaker 3: asked what we were writing about, and in a panic 424 00:32:35,680 --> 00:32:39,479 Speaker 3: for what to say, I blurted out a compound, A 425 00:32:39,520 --> 00:32:45,920 Speaker 3: compound called seven metal I ownamine. He stiffened, rose from 426 00:32:45,960 --> 00:32:48,640 Speaker 3: his chair and took a step backward, as if suddenly 427 00:32:48,680 --> 00:32:52,200 Speaker 3: afraid of me. He looked me up and down. His 428 00:32:52,320 --> 00:32:57,080 Speaker 3: voice became very quiet. You're not one of them, he said, 429 00:32:58,200 --> 00:33:02,480 Speaker 3: Did they send you? I asked who he meant? With 430 00:33:02,640 --> 00:33:07,920 Speaker 3: evident terror, he whispered foss. I said I didn't know 431 00:33:08,000 --> 00:33:11,000 Speaker 3: what he was talking about, but that I had been 432 00:33:11,440 --> 00:33:14,320 Speaker 3: given to some of the compound by raymart and I 433 00:33:14,400 --> 00:33:17,720 Speaker 3: needed more. Could he get it for me? He said 434 00:33:17,760 --> 00:33:20,840 Speaker 3: no and told me to go away. I explained I 435 00:33:20,960 --> 00:33:24,000 Speaker 3: was desperate. I told him I would pay anything for it. 436 00:33:24,520 --> 00:33:27,959 Speaker 3: He began shouting, shouting for me to leave his office 437 00:33:27,960 --> 00:33:34,200 Speaker 3: and never come back. Not knowing what to do, I 438 00:33:34,240 --> 00:33:36,800 Speaker 3: hid in a laboratory stall down the hall until later 439 00:33:36,880 --> 00:33:39,240 Speaker 3: that night, when every one had left and the building 440 00:33:39,320 --> 00:33:46,160 Speaker 3: was locked up. With a bit of a jimmy, I 441 00:33:46,240 --> 00:33:53,920 Speaker 3: broke into Raymard's laboratory and began looking around. I ransacked 442 00:33:53,920 --> 00:33:57,360 Speaker 3: the cupboards and the sample drawers and the file cabinets. Nothing. 443 00:33:57,880 --> 00:34:04,920 Speaker 3: There was no powder anywhere. But then something caught my attention. 444 00:34:06,280 --> 00:34:09,480 Speaker 3: A large photograph lying in the heap among all the 445 00:34:09,520 --> 00:34:13,080 Speaker 3: papers from the file cabinets, A photograph of a rock 446 00:34:13,480 --> 00:34:19,080 Speaker 3: covered in splotches of gray, green, and yellow. I knelt 447 00:34:19,080 --> 00:34:23,080 Speaker 3: and picked up the picture. It was a patch of lichen. 448 00:34:24,239 --> 00:34:27,239 Speaker 3: The photo was dated from several years before, and it 449 00:34:27,320 --> 00:34:32,560 Speaker 3: was labeled source of sample north face of khn Iron. 450 00:34:35,840 --> 00:34:39,640 Speaker 3: I felt something grip inside my gut. I'd heard that 451 00:34:39,800 --> 00:34:44,160 Speaker 3: name before, long before. Khn Iron was the mountain of 452 00:34:44,239 --> 00:34:47,600 Speaker 3: Daddy's last meditation, where they found him at the top. 453 00:34:49,840 --> 00:34:52,799 Speaker 3: Without returning home, I booked another ticket and made my 454 00:34:52,880 --> 00:34:58,719 Speaker 3: way to Aberdeen. There I rented a car. I was delirious, 455 00:34:59,120 --> 00:35:01,400 Speaker 3: no telling how long I had gone without proper sleep. 456 00:35:04,920 --> 00:35:08,040 Speaker 3: I drove up a long, lonely road through the Highland 457 00:35:08,040 --> 00:35:14,279 Speaker 3: glen to the foot of cahn Aran. The peak of 458 00:35:14,320 --> 00:35:16,799 Speaker 3: the mountain was ringed with gray fog when it came 459 00:35:16,880 --> 00:35:20,120 Speaker 3: into view, and the rocks along the path were slick 460 00:35:20,160 --> 00:35:30,120 Speaker 3: from the morning's rain. I began to hike up the slope, 461 00:35:30,160 --> 00:35:33,399 Speaker 3: clutching the photograph of the Lichen. I made my way 462 00:35:33,480 --> 00:35:36,200 Speaker 3: up through the corner of the forest, then on a 463 00:35:36,200 --> 00:35:39,319 Speaker 3: steep incline over a ridge like the spine of a 464 00:35:39,400 --> 00:35:45,440 Speaker 3: great beast. I looked all around for the Lichen, venturing 465 00:35:45,480 --> 00:35:48,280 Speaker 3: far off the hiking trail, turning over rocks and checking 466 00:35:48,320 --> 00:35:53,040 Speaker 3: their undersides like a child collecting insects. And finally, at 467 00:35:53,160 --> 00:35:58,680 Speaker 3: long last, I found it on the upturned face of 468 00:35:58,760 --> 00:36:04,960 Speaker 3: a huge flat boulder. The lichen was a papery mass 469 00:36:04,960 --> 00:36:11,720 Speaker 3: of pale green and yellow substance that somehow looked almost delicious. 470 00:36:12,520 --> 00:36:17,120 Speaker 3: I assure you it was not. It was poisonously bitter, 471 00:36:17,480 --> 00:36:20,960 Speaker 3: with the texture of old rope. But I choked down 472 00:36:21,000 --> 00:36:23,879 Speaker 3: as much as I could. I managed quite a bit. 473 00:36:27,280 --> 00:36:31,440 Speaker 3: I waited and waited for what seemed like hours on end, 474 00:36:31,520 --> 00:36:35,520 Speaker 3: but I felt nothing save for an increasingly vicious stirring 475 00:36:35,560 --> 00:36:40,000 Speaker 3: of nausea. Eventually I had to be sick in the 476 00:36:40,040 --> 00:36:47,480 Speaker 3: weeds beside the boulder. Had I lost my mind? I 477 00:36:47,560 --> 00:36:50,200 Speaker 3: didn't even know if it would work this way? Did 478 00:36:50,320 --> 00:36:53,759 Speaker 3: Raymond have to do some sort of chemistry to isolate 479 00:36:53,840 --> 00:36:57,280 Speaker 3: something within the lichen? Was I even sure I'd found 480 00:36:57,320 --> 00:37:03,080 Speaker 3: the right organism? It was a miserable defeat. I sat 481 00:37:03,120 --> 00:37:06,640 Speaker 3: on the boulder, ill and exhausted, and sulked in self 482 00:37:06,680 --> 00:37:12,440 Speaker 3: pity as clouds gathered their gray bulk. Evermore overhead, the 483 00:37:12,480 --> 00:37:15,200 Speaker 3: sun went down, and the shadow of the mountain swept 484 00:37:15,200 --> 00:37:17,760 Speaker 3: over the valley to the east at a racing clip. 485 00:37:19,320 --> 00:37:23,399 Speaker 3: As I thought about it, I realized Daddy may well 486 00:37:23,480 --> 00:37:27,480 Speaker 3: have looked out over the same gloomy view his last 487 00:37:27,560 --> 00:37:31,200 Speaker 3: day on Earth. Did he sit on the same boulder 488 00:37:31,960 --> 00:37:35,279 Speaker 3: and rest half way up the mountain? Was he surrounded 489 00:37:35,320 --> 00:37:41,200 Speaker 3: by pale pink frogs just like these? Would he have 490 00:37:41,400 --> 00:37:45,480 Speaker 3: noticed the way their skin looked like rare veal, leaking 491 00:37:45,640 --> 00:37:49,479 Speaker 3: juices under the pressure of the carving fork. I tried 492 00:37:49,520 --> 00:37:52,680 Speaker 3: to ask the rosy froglets if they had any memory 493 00:37:52,680 --> 00:37:57,480 Speaker 3: of him, but they were not especially talkative. Instead, they 494 00:37:57,520 --> 00:38:00,360 Speaker 3: began to leave my side all at once, in a 495 00:38:00,360 --> 00:38:06,279 Speaker 3: frenzy up the mountain slope. How strange, I thought it 496 00:38:06,360 --> 00:38:09,680 Speaker 3: was almost as if they were fleeing in terror. So 497 00:38:09,800 --> 00:38:13,000 Speaker 3: I turned back to look down at the valley, and 498 00:38:13,120 --> 00:38:17,759 Speaker 3: I saw what it was, the water line of darkness. 499 00:38:18,680 --> 00:38:21,440 Speaker 3: I had felt just the edges of it in my 500 00:38:21,560 --> 00:38:25,480 Speaker 3: house a few nights before. Now I saw it complete 501 00:38:25,640 --> 00:38:29,520 Speaker 3: in its awful majesty, stretching as far as an ocean 502 00:38:29,520 --> 00:38:33,320 Speaker 3: would have. A mist of moonless blackness rose from the 503 00:38:33,400 --> 00:38:37,239 Speaker 3: valley and ascended the mountain side, And hidden in the 504 00:38:37,360 --> 00:38:44,839 Speaker 3: darkness came the things creatures of a chilling primeval innocence, 505 00:38:45,440 --> 00:38:50,600 Speaker 3: the silent Cambrian infants crawling on hands and knees. My 506 00:38:50,719 --> 00:38:53,279 Speaker 3: mind was seized with flashes of what could happen if 507 00:38:53,360 --> 00:38:56,600 Speaker 3: the little children overtook me. They did not laugh or 508 00:38:56,640 --> 00:39:02,000 Speaker 3: shout that they would play. My heart contracted with terror. 509 00:39:02,880 --> 00:39:05,400 Speaker 3: I scrambled from the boulder and ran as fast as 510 00:39:05,440 --> 00:39:10,000 Speaker 3: I could up the mountain path. Up above me were 511 00:39:10,000 --> 00:39:13,240 Speaker 3: the silhouettes of several men, whose skin seemed to glitter 512 00:39:13,320 --> 00:39:17,880 Speaker 3: with dull reflections in the gray light. When I came close, 513 00:39:18,280 --> 00:39:22,840 Speaker 3: I saw they were man shaped things, made not a flesh, 514 00:39:22,920 --> 00:39:27,200 Speaker 3: but of thousands of little metal objects, safety pins, batteries 515 00:39:27,200 --> 00:39:29,759 Speaker 3: and fish hawks, all held together by a sort of 516 00:39:30,480 --> 00:39:36,920 Speaker 3: animate magnetism. They were slow moving. They begged me for 517 00:39:37,000 --> 00:39:40,239 Speaker 3: help in their rattling language, but I couldn't stop. I 518 00:39:40,600 --> 00:39:44,520 Speaker 3: ran past and left them behind to be played with. 519 00:39:49,040 --> 00:39:52,080 Speaker 3: The path steepened, and I climbed with a ferocity of 520 00:39:52,120 --> 00:39:55,760 Speaker 3: which I wouldn't have thought myself capable. I was driven 521 00:39:55,800 --> 00:39:58,600 Speaker 3: now not only by the fear of what rose from below, 522 00:39:59,120 --> 00:40:02,320 Speaker 3: but by a del larious ecstasy of what lay above. 523 00:40:04,040 --> 00:40:07,960 Speaker 3: Stone shattered under my toes like globes of glass, and 524 00:40:08,000 --> 00:40:12,120 Speaker 3: the soil gave off the aroma of bread crust. The 525 00:40:12,160 --> 00:40:15,480 Speaker 3: boulders that lined the path bloomed with the sacred lichen 526 00:40:15,560 --> 00:40:20,880 Speaker 3: in shapes of naked bodies, humming with pleasure, and splitting 527 00:40:21,000 --> 00:40:24,400 Speaker 3: up masses of oysters and offal that fell at my 528 00:40:24,520 --> 00:40:29,360 Speaker 3: feet as I passed this. This was their way of 529 00:40:29,400 --> 00:40:35,920 Speaker 3: showing respect. Meanwhile, all around black habitat. Monks stood guard 530 00:40:36,200 --> 00:40:40,399 Speaker 3: underneath prisoners who were hoisted up to the sky upon 531 00:40:40,600 --> 00:40:47,480 Speaker 3: Catherine wheels, my namesake, I thought. The men and women 532 00:40:47,520 --> 00:40:52,600 Speaker 3: blashed on the wheels sang together. Yes, it was all 533 00:40:52,640 --> 00:40:56,759 Speaker 3: starting to make sense. I understood that the prisoners on 534 00:40:56,840 --> 00:41:00,480 Speaker 3: the wheels were not being punished. They were in the shines, 535 00:41:01,400 --> 00:41:05,279 Speaker 3: machines for generating a kind of power, like the turbines 536 00:41:05,320 --> 00:41:11,640 Speaker 3: in a down. The monks standing guard under the wheels 537 00:41:11,640 --> 00:41:14,520 Speaker 3: of torture all raised their arms when they saw me, 538 00:41:15,000 --> 00:41:19,799 Speaker 3: all pointing in the same direction to the top, just 539 00:41:20,080 --> 00:41:24,880 Speaker 3: over the last ridge of rock. As I climbed above, 540 00:41:25,040 --> 00:41:36,960 Speaker 3: finally I felt him, the presence the Major DOMO. He 541 00:41:37,040 --> 00:41:42,200 Speaker 3: was looming just behind me, breathing on my neck. But 542 00:41:42,320 --> 00:41:45,160 Speaker 3: I knew it would be terribly bad manners to turn 543 00:41:45,160 --> 00:41:52,719 Speaker 3: and look. Without a word, he guided me through the 544 00:41:52,760 --> 00:41:56,160 Speaker 3: fog until the jagged rocks of the peak gave way 545 00:41:56,280 --> 00:42:01,080 Speaker 3: to a smooth, paved pathway of flagstones and mortar, surrounded 546 00:42:01,120 --> 00:42:05,920 Speaker 3: by crisp green hedges on either side. It was a 547 00:42:06,000 --> 00:42:11,120 Speaker 3: secret garden path leading me to a mansion with its 548 00:42:11,200 --> 00:42:17,520 Speaker 3: windows bleeding yellow light. My voice trembling, I asked the 549 00:42:17,560 --> 00:42:24,240 Speaker 3: Major d'ama, Will you ah take me inside? The Major 550 00:42:24,320 --> 00:42:33,160 Speaker 3: d'omo whispered, perhaps, but not yet. I understood there was 551 00:42:33,160 --> 00:42:36,439 Speaker 3: something I had to do first. I had to meet 552 00:42:36,440 --> 00:42:42,640 Speaker 3: some one. There was a lanky human shadow on the 553 00:42:42,680 --> 00:42:45,640 Speaker 3: path just ahead. When I saw the figure, my heart 554 00:42:45,719 --> 00:42:51,040 Speaker 3: leapt into my throat. I thought, Daddy. But as I 555 00:42:51,120 --> 00:42:54,040 Speaker 3: ran to meet him, with tears gathering in my eyes, 556 00:42:54,719 --> 00:42:57,560 Speaker 3: the shape that came into focus was all wrong. It 557 00:42:58,040 --> 00:43:04,480 Speaker 3: was not my father. It was Raymard, standing athwart the path, 558 00:43:04,880 --> 00:43:09,160 Speaker 3: wearing a cheshire cat grin. I asked her what she 559 00:43:09,360 --> 00:43:15,359 Speaker 3: was doing here, and she leaned in to embrace me, whispering, Catherine, 560 00:43:15,640 --> 00:43:19,760 Speaker 3: I have the most wonderful news. I have been given 561 00:43:19,800 --> 00:43:25,120 Speaker 3: a research grant by God Almighty, and you are to 562 00:43:25,160 --> 00:43:30,840 Speaker 3: be my assistant. I was flummoxed to say the least. 563 00:43:31,280 --> 00:43:35,160 Speaker 3: I said, but his house is right there. Can't I 564 00:43:35,360 --> 00:43:39,600 Speaker 3: go inside and learn what he is like? Raymard said, 565 00:43:40,360 --> 00:43:44,960 Speaker 3: you will, but you're not ready yet. First you must 566 00:43:45,080 --> 00:43:55,640 Speaker 3: learn the secret, the oldest secret. She then stepped back 567 00:43:56,440 --> 00:44:04,360 Speaker 3: and unbuttoned her glass, and her skin was not skin, 568 00:44:05,520 --> 00:44:12,120 Speaker 3: but a sort of plate thronged with legs. Hundreds thousands 569 00:44:12,160 --> 00:44:18,080 Speaker 3: of dancing, undulating articulated legs like the underside of a 570 00:44:18,160 --> 00:44:23,560 Speaker 3: horseshoe crab. A tear of blue blood leaped from the 571 00:44:23,600 --> 00:44:27,280 Speaker 3: corner of her eye. She came in close to embrace 572 00:44:27,320 --> 00:44:30,440 Speaker 3: me again. In horror, I tried my best to recoil, 573 00:44:30,800 --> 00:44:34,160 Speaker 3: but now the major Domo stood behind to hold me 574 00:44:34,239 --> 00:44:40,200 Speaker 3: in place. Raymond's breath smelled like copper. The legs wriggled 575 00:44:40,200 --> 00:44:45,200 Speaker 3: and flexed, close enough to tickle my stomach. I screamed, no, no, 576 00:44:45,440 --> 00:44:51,400 Speaker 3: this is not what I wanted. Raymond leaned to my 577 00:44:51,520 --> 00:44:53,160 Speaker 3: ear and said. 578 00:44:55,680 --> 00:44:58,560 Speaker 2: Hard, let us be here. 579 00:44:59,200 --> 00:45:14,320 Speaker 3: Instr my memory stops there. I woke the next morning, 580 00:45:14,400 --> 00:45:17,240 Speaker 3: lying on the cold rocks of the mountain top, parched 581 00:45:17,560 --> 00:45:20,200 Speaker 3: stiff as a plank. There was a man dressed in 582 00:45:20,239 --> 00:45:25,080 Speaker 3: a black habit, kneeling beside me, touching my arm. He said, good, Heavens, 583 00:45:25,120 --> 00:45:29,160 Speaker 3: are you all right? He must have seen me looking 584 00:45:29,200 --> 00:45:33,040 Speaker 3: at his clothes, and answered, without my asking, I'm one 585 00:45:33,080 --> 00:45:36,040 Speaker 3: of the brothers of the monastery here at carm Aron. 586 00:45:36,840 --> 00:45:39,680 Speaker 3: You look like you've taken a fall. Would you like 587 00:45:39,800 --> 00:45:43,160 Speaker 3: me to get some help? I told him not to bother, 588 00:45:44,040 --> 00:45:46,440 Speaker 3: and I rose to go on my way, limping on 589 00:45:46,480 --> 00:45:49,640 Speaker 3: a leg I had injured somehow in the night. But 590 00:45:49,719 --> 00:45:53,840 Speaker 3: as I was walking away, he said, were you invited in? 591 00:45:56,360 --> 00:46:02,200 Speaker 3: I stopped. I asked in where? He said, beyond the 592 00:46:02,320 --> 00:46:08,080 Speaker 3: secret garden, into his house. I rushed back to the 593 00:46:08,120 --> 00:46:11,400 Speaker 3: monk's side. What do you know about it? I asked. 594 00:46:12,320 --> 00:46:16,960 Speaker 3: The monk smiled. He said, are you seeking to believe 595 00:46:17,320 --> 00:46:21,880 Speaker 3: in order that you may understand? Or seeking to understand 596 00:46:22,160 --> 00:46:27,120 Speaker 3: in order that you may believe? I felt a hopeless 597 00:46:27,120 --> 00:46:31,319 Speaker 3: despair come over me. I didn't know. In truth, I 598 00:46:31,400 --> 00:46:33,319 Speaker 3: feared I'd lost track of what it was I was 599 00:46:33,320 --> 00:46:35,239 Speaker 3: trying to prove and whom I was trying to prove 600 00:46:35,280 --> 00:46:39,440 Speaker 3: it too. But I was in his presence, I said, 601 00:46:40,040 --> 00:46:45,319 Speaker 3: nearly in his mansion, I see, said the monk, the 602 00:46:45,360 --> 00:46:50,520 Speaker 3: greatest conceivable being, I said. He smiled placidly, as if 603 00:46:50,520 --> 00:46:53,759 Speaker 3: to humor me, the god who called out to Abraham, 604 00:46:54,080 --> 00:47:00,200 Speaker 3: I said. But then the monk's expression changed. He looked, amuteoos, 605 00:47:01,000 --> 00:47:06,120 Speaker 3: oh him, you think down here on this bleak mountain 606 00:47:06,200 --> 00:47:09,959 Speaker 3: top with us. I didn't know what to make of that. 607 00:47:10,480 --> 00:47:13,520 Speaker 3: The monk said to me, if there were two beings, 608 00:47:13,840 --> 00:47:18,840 Speaker 3: both infinitely beyond your understanding, and both claimed to be 609 00:47:18,960 --> 00:47:25,000 Speaker 3: the greatest? How would you tell them apart? I had 610 00:47:25,000 --> 00:47:29,520 Speaker 3: no answer. I asked, will I ever understand what he is? 611 00:47:30,560 --> 00:47:34,440 Speaker 3: The monk said, well, now, if you wish to be 612 00:47:34,560 --> 00:47:38,960 Speaker 3: welcomed into his manner and taste of his bread, I 613 00:47:39,040 --> 00:47:44,479 Speaker 3: suggest you make yourself a courteous house guest. I said, 614 00:47:44,880 --> 00:47:49,319 Speaker 3: how would one do that? He said, for one thing, 615 00:47:49,960 --> 00:47:54,239 Speaker 3: when a courteous house guest comes to visit, she always 616 00:47:54,360 --> 00:47:58,080 Speaker 3: brings a gift. I asked, well, what should she bring? 617 00:48:00,000 --> 00:48:02,560 Speaker 3: I laid a gentle hand on my shoulder and said, 618 00:48:03,239 --> 00:48:14,160 Speaker 3: what is most precious? Looking back, I realized the sheer 619 00:48:14,239 --> 00:48:17,799 Speaker 3: hubris of my initial endeavor. Though I find myself in 620 00:48:17,840 --> 00:48:22,600 Speaker 3: good company with the likes of Daddy and Saint Anselm himself, 621 00:48:23,640 --> 00:48:26,719 Speaker 3: I know now that the mysteries of totality are too 622 00:48:26,800 --> 00:48:30,800 Speaker 3: much for one mind alone, and with alacrity I settled 623 00:48:30,800 --> 00:48:34,400 Speaker 3: for just a glimpse. So I turned myself over to 624 00:48:34,440 --> 00:48:38,720 Speaker 3: Doctor Raymard's care, in which I have been ever since. 625 00:48:42,040 --> 00:48:46,840 Speaker 3: Ever said, what do you mean? Will call me a 626 00:48:46,920 --> 00:48:50,400 Speaker 3: test case? An experiment in the long term effects of 627 00:48:50,520 --> 00:48:54,799 Speaker 3: seven metal ie on mine on human consciousness? How can 628 00:48:54,800 --> 00:48:59,560 Speaker 3: you big if you like but one of many and 629 00:49:00,080 --> 00:49:04,560 Speaker 3: the labrat likes to have company in her cage. 630 00:49:07,280 --> 00:49:10,839 Speaker 6: You're saying, you're saying they drugged me too. 631 00:49:12,160 --> 00:49:16,440 Speaker 3: Oh I mview you know, experiencing it all for the 632 00:49:16,520 --> 00:49:23,520 Speaker 3: first time. No, no, help, give me out, you need 633 00:49:24,080 --> 00:49:32,200 Speaker 3: let out? You mean cat? No you say, let me 634 00:49:32,280 --> 00:49:35,720 Speaker 3: have her heart rate spike crack on the rejection. 635 00:49:35,920 --> 00:49:37,360 Speaker 2: All of you will get away from me. 636 00:49:37,719 --> 00:49:38,359 Speaker 1: What's the course? 637 00:49:38,400 --> 00:49:41,080 Speaker 3: Gave me alone? It's a tranquilizer with one more dos 638 00:49:41,480 --> 00:49:44,400 Speaker 3: seven stop stops. 639 00:49:45,280 --> 00:49:59,360 Speaker 5: No you see look here not seeing me? 640 00:49:59,680 --> 00:49:59,920 Speaker 6: Was it? 641 00:50:00,200 --> 00:50:01,480 Speaker 3: Where are you taking me? 642 00:50:06,239 --> 00:50:07,240 Speaker 2: Where is this saying? 643 00:50:08,920 --> 00:50:09,640 Speaker 5: Was on the ground? 644 00:50:09,880 --> 00:50:10,720 Speaker 3: How much you listen? 645 00:50:13,160 --> 00:50:14,480 Speaker 2: Why are you carrying me? 646 00:50:15,800 --> 00:50:19,080 Speaker 3: Because you wouldn't walk? 647 00:50:19,920 --> 00:50:21,840 Speaker 2: Where are my shoes? 648 00:50:22,040 --> 00:50:23,040 Speaker 5: Would you t. 649 00:50:25,040 --> 00:50:25,200 Speaker 1: There? 650 00:50:25,239 --> 00:50:25,680 Speaker 6: You go. 651 00:50:33,480 --> 00:50:33,880 Speaker 3: Go to? 652 00:50:34,040 --> 00:50:34,719 Speaker 6: What the like? 653 00:50:40,160 --> 00:50:46,120 Speaker 3: Mm hmm? Well look who's back? 654 00:50:47,440 --> 00:50:47,800 Speaker 6: Frip. 655 00:50:48,120 --> 00:50:52,560 Speaker 3: I wasn't sure you were still with us? Frip. I 656 00:50:52,560 --> 00:50:53,680 Speaker 3: I sorry. 657 00:50:55,760 --> 00:50:57,720 Speaker 2: Everything is so overwhelming. 658 00:50:58,800 --> 00:51:05,160 Speaker 3: What happened to you? The door? I'm the dungeon. 659 00:51:06,520 --> 00:51:07,400 Speaker 6: And the doctor. 660 00:51:09,480 --> 00:51:12,879 Speaker 3: Did you put you on a new course of treatment? Yes, 661 00:51:14,760 --> 00:51:18,640 Speaker 3: and I am. I don't know if I can take it? 662 00:51:19,200 --> 00:51:24,200 Speaker 3: You can, it will run its course. How How do 663 00:51:24,280 --> 00:51:25,680 Speaker 3: I just relax? 664 00:51:26,680 --> 00:51:28,640 Speaker 2: Okay, lay down on the bed. 665 00:51:29,160 --> 00:51:39,600 Speaker 3: Okay, okay, now, imagine you are in a river right 666 00:51:39,640 --> 00:51:43,719 Speaker 3: in the middle where the current is strongest. You guess 667 00:51:43,760 --> 00:51:44,560 Speaker 3: whom against it? 668 00:51:45,560 --> 00:51:45,680 Speaker 6: Uh? 669 00:51:46,120 --> 00:51:47,400 Speaker 3: You can't fight back? 670 00:51:48,360 --> 00:51:51,880 Speaker 5: Nope, I can't, but you can. 671 00:51:51,760 --> 00:51:58,640 Speaker 3: Float Okay, don't fight it. Okay, let the current move you. Okay, 672 00:51:59,239 --> 00:51:59,799 Speaker 3: float down? 673 00:52:00,600 --> 00:52:06,560 Speaker 6: Okay, okay, Hey, frip myself. 674 00:52:06,680 --> 00:52:10,680 Speaker 3: They didn't, They didn't give it away. Who would they 675 00:52:10,680 --> 00:52:11,279 Speaker 3: have given it to? 676 00:52:12,680 --> 00:52:13,040 Speaker 6: Frip? 677 00:52:14,360 --> 00:52:17,319 Speaker 3: Have you seen anyone walk in the halls at night? 678 00:52:18,520 --> 00:52:22,840 Speaker 3: You mean, besides the guards, the barefoot woman? Have you 679 00:52:22,880 --> 00:52:29,640 Speaker 3: heard her singing? Quiet? Now? Okay, just flew okay down? 680 00:52:31,040 --> 00:52:31,440 Speaker 6: Thank you? 681 00:52:31,560 --> 00:52:38,440 Speaker 3: Frip Frip, frip. 682 00:52:40,280 --> 00:52:40,720 Speaker 6: Frip. 683 00:53:00,080 --> 00:53:01,040 Speaker 3: Oh YEA. 684 00:53:16,200 --> 00:53:21,439 Speaker 1: Thirteen Days of Halloween pennance starring Natalie Morales, Episode four 685 00:53:21,719 --> 00:53:26,399 Speaker 1: Evaluation written by Joe McCormick, editing and sound design by 686 00:53:26,480 --> 00:53:30,440 Speaker 1: Chandler Mays, featuring the voices of Roz Gentel Blair, Chandler, 687 00:53:30,719 --> 00:53:35,759 Speaker 1: Alex Bowling, Jay Jones, Raphael Corkil, and Wilbur Fitzgerald, with 688 00:53:35,960 --> 00:53:41,400 Speaker 1: music by Noel Brown. Directed by Alexander Williams. Executive producers 689 00:53:41,440 --> 00:53:45,880 Speaker 1: Aaron Mankey, Noah Feinberg, Chris Dicky, Matt Frederick and Alexander 690 00:53:45,920 --> 00:53:51,400 Speaker 1: Williams Supervising producers Trevor Young and Josh Thain. Producers Jesse Funk, 691 00:53:51,560 --> 00:53:56,680 Speaker 1: Rima Ilkali, Noami Griffin, Chandler Mays, and Casby Bias. Script 692 00:53:56,840 --> 00:54:01,040 Speaker 1: editing by Lauren Vogelbaum, Story consultants Ben Bowley and Matthew Riddle. 693 00:54:01,400 --> 00:54:05,840 Speaker 1: Casting by Sunday Bowling CSA and Meg Mormon CSA. Production 694 00:54:05,960 --> 00:54:11,160 Speaker 1: coordinator Wayna Calderon. Production assistants Jenna Johnson and Winona Low. 695 00:54:11,480 --> 00:54:15,440 Speaker 1: Theme music by Rose Aserti with vocals by Anna Hummler, 696 00:54:15,800 --> 00:54:20,120 Speaker 1: recorded at This Is Sound Design Studios in Burbank, California. 697 00:54:20,200 --> 00:54:25,359 Speaker 1: Engineered by Ross aeronaut special thanks to Romelia Osorio, Nathan Rule, 698 00:54:25,600 --> 00:54:29,560 Speaker 1: Glen Nishida, and Rob Mosca. Thirteen Days of Halloween was 699 00:54:29,640 --> 00:54:33,040 Speaker 1: created by Matt Frederick and Alexander Williams and is a 700 00:54:33,080 --> 00:54:37,000 Speaker 1: production of iHeart Podcasts, Blumhouse Television, and Grim and Mild 701 00:54:37,120 --> 00:54:40,640 Speaker 1: from Aaron Makey. Learn more about the show at Grimandmild 702 00:54:40,800 --> 00:54:44,319 Speaker 1: dot com slash thirteen Days and find more podcasts from 703 00:54:44,360 --> 00:54:48,520 Speaker 1: iHeartRadio by visiting the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever 704 00:54:48,600 --> 00:54:51,640 Speaker 1: you listen to your favorite shows. Happy Halloween,