1 00:00:03,440 --> 00:00:06,680 Speaker 1: Welcome to Before Breakfast, a production of My Heart Radio. 2 00:00:09,440 --> 00:00:14,040 Speaker 1: Good Morning, This is Laura. Welcome to the Before Breakfast podcast. 3 00:00:14,880 --> 00:00:19,000 Speaker 1: Today's tip is about how to push back respectfully when 4 00:00:19,079 --> 00:00:23,639 Speaker 1: somebody makes an unreasonable request at work. Today's tip, like 5 00:00:23,720 --> 00:00:27,200 Speaker 1: some will cover next week, comes from management expert Allison 6 00:00:27,200 --> 00:00:31,320 Speaker 1: Green's book Ask a Manager. In this book, she covers 7 00:00:31,360 --> 00:00:35,159 Speaker 1: all sorts of sticky situations that make the workplace a 8 00:00:35,200 --> 00:00:39,479 Speaker 1: bit less wonderful. In a perfect world, everyone would be 9 00:00:39,560 --> 00:00:44,120 Speaker 1: mature and emotionally aware, no one would ever ask for 10 00:00:44,200 --> 00:00:49,360 Speaker 1: anything unreasonable. Alas, we work with human beings who, like us, 11 00:00:49,840 --> 00:00:53,200 Speaker 1: are wrapped up in their own dramas. What often happens 12 00:00:53,280 --> 00:00:56,600 Speaker 1: is that people have no idea what goes into your job, 13 00:00:57,160 --> 00:01:01,120 Speaker 1: and so they have no idea what's reasonable and what isn't. 14 00:01:02,000 --> 00:01:04,120 Speaker 1: When I was having some home renovation work done, I 15 00:01:04,240 --> 00:01:06,600 Speaker 1: visited a contractor who'd put a cartoon on the wall 16 00:01:07,080 --> 00:01:09,640 Speaker 1: featuring a couple asking for their entire house to be 17 00:01:09,720 --> 00:01:14,039 Speaker 1: gutted and redone for some pittance. The beleaguered contractor in 18 00:01:14,040 --> 00:01:18,000 Speaker 1: the cartoon suggested that perhaps they've been watching a bit 19 00:01:18,040 --> 00:01:21,360 Speaker 1: too much h G TV, So it goes in the 20 00:01:21,400 --> 00:01:24,880 Speaker 1: rest of life for instance, maybe a colleague keeps giving 21 00:01:24,880 --> 00:01:28,960 Speaker 1: you last minute work. Is she a terrible person? Maybe, 22 00:01:29,600 --> 00:01:32,600 Speaker 1: but maybe in her mind it's a small request, or 23 00:01:32,680 --> 00:01:35,560 Speaker 1: she cluelessly believes it's the only thing you have on 24 00:01:35,600 --> 00:01:39,679 Speaker 1: your plate and ask a manager. Green suggests keeping this 25 00:01:39,800 --> 00:01:43,120 Speaker 1: mindset that she may not even realize that what she's 26 00:01:43,160 --> 00:01:46,319 Speaker 1: doing is a problem. So how can you explain that 27 00:01:46,360 --> 00:01:50,960 Speaker 1: it is a problem and solve it? Try this script? 28 00:01:51,760 --> 00:01:53,280 Speaker 1: Is there a way for me to get this type 29 00:01:53,280 --> 00:01:56,200 Speaker 1: of work earlier? It can take a while to turn 30 00:01:56,240 --> 00:01:59,240 Speaker 1: it around, and when I have other looming deadlines, it's 31 00:01:59,280 --> 00:02:03,000 Speaker 1: hard to fit it, and when I don't have more notice. Ideally, 32 00:02:03,320 --> 00:02:05,160 Speaker 1: I'd like at least a few days with this kind 33 00:02:05,200 --> 00:02:08,400 Speaker 1: of thing, since I'm fitting it in around other priorities. 34 00:02:09,520 --> 00:02:12,600 Speaker 1: And if it keeps happening, well, maybe make her deadline 35 00:02:13,160 --> 00:02:16,160 Speaker 1: not your problem. I can try to fit this in, 36 00:02:16,360 --> 00:02:18,480 Speaker 1: but I had most of today and tomorrow scheduled for 37 00:02:18,520 --> 00:02:20,960 Speaker 1: other work. Is there any wiggle room on the deadline 38 00:02:21,000 --> 00:02:23,520 Speaker 1: for this since it's coming to me so late? If 39 00:02:23,520 --> 00:02:25,799 Speaker 1: you've got clearance from your boss for something else that 40 00:02:25,919 --> 00:02:28,880 Speaker 1: really has to get done, first, mentioned this and then 41 00:02:28,880 --> 00:02:31,639 Speaker 1: just smile and let her figure out how to deal 42 00:02:31,680 --> 00:02:34,600 Speaker 1: with this reality, or perhaps you have a colleague who 43 00:02:34,680 --> 00:02:38,160 Speaker 1: keeps asking you to do something that really isn't your job. 44 00:02:38,840 --> 00:02:42,000 Speaker 1: As Green notes, you probably don't want to directly say 45 00:02:42,360 --> 00:02:46,279 Speaker 1: that's not my job. And true all hands on deck situations, 46 00:02:46,320 --> 00:02:49,800 Speaker 1: everything is everyone's job. But for day to day stuff, 47 00:02:49,840 --> 00:02:52,359 Speaker 1: you're best off explaining why you're not the right person, 48 00:02:52,400 --> 00:02:56,440 Speaker 1: and if possible, who might be some scripts. I'm on 49 00:02:56,520 --> 00:02:58,720 Speaker 1: deadline with high priority X, and I've got to stay 50 00:02:58,760 --> 00:03:02,359 Speaker 1: focused on that, so I can't help. Unfortunately, you can 51 00:03:02,480 --> 00:03:05,000 Speaker 1: again cite your manager and note that you've been told 52 00:03:05,000 --> 00:03:09,000 Speaker 1: to focus exclusively on cleaning up some other backlog. Now, 53 00:03:09,040 --> 00:03:12,320 Speaker 1: of course, the problem with the busy excuse is that 54 00:03:12,360 --> 00:03:14,600 Speaker 1: you might want to make sure that your computer screen 55 00:03:14,720 --> 00:03:17,840 Speaker 1: is an obviously tuned to online headlines that have nothing 56 00:03:17,840 --> 00:03:21,040 Speaker 1: to do with your job as you're saying this, And 57 00:03:21,080 --> 00:03:24,640 Speaker 1: this is why I prefer Green's other potential script, which 58 00:03:24,680 --> 00:03:28,160 Speaker 1: takes the focus off time and puts it back on 59 00:03:28,240 --> 00:03:32,640 Speaker 1: the actual work. M hmm. You might say, I'm not 60 00:03:32,720 --> 00:03:35,560 Speaker 1: usually the person who handles that. I think Pablo is, 61 00:03:35,640 --> 00:03:38,800 Speaker 1: and he should be able to help you, because, honestly, 62 00:03:38,840 --> 00:03:42,000 Speaker 1: a big part of solving the problem of unreasonable requests 63 00:03:42,160 --> 00:03:45,400 Speaker 1: is as green notes, believing that it's okay to protect 64 00:03:45,400 --> 00:03:47,880 Speaker 1: your own time and say no to this kind of thing. 65 00:03:48,680 --> 00:03:52,120 Speaker 1: If you truly internalize this, then you're more naturally push 66 00:03:52,160 --> 00:03:55,800 Speaker 1: back in a friendly but confident way. If you're not 67 00:03:55,880 --> 00:03:58,680 Speaker 1: a millionaire and someone asked you for a million dollars, 68 00:03:59,240 --> 00:04:01,920 Speaker 1: you'd laugh, shrug it off with a simple wish I 69 00:04:01,960 --> 00:04:05,360 Speaker 1: could help you there. You wouldn't agonize ever your answer. 70 00:04:06,040 --> 00:04:08,120 Speaker 1: And just like you don't have a million dollars, you 71 00:04:08,160 --> 00:04:11,320 Speaker 1: don't have all the time in the world either. We 72 00:04:11,360 --> 00:04:14,600 Speaker 1: can save our help for the reasonable requests. That is, 73 00:04:14,680 --> 00:04:17,520 Speaker 1: the ones where there is a clear objective, we know 74 00:04:17,640 --> 00:04:21,039 Speaker 1: we can help and the person has enough relationship capital 75 00:04:21,080 --> 00:04:23,839 Speaker 1: with us where we want to do what we can 76 00:04:24,960 --> 00:04:30,840 Speaker 1: Absent that. This is withdrawals without deposits. No one can 77 00:04:30,880 --> 00:04:34,279 Speaker 1: sustain that for long. So what will you push back 78 00:04:34,320 --> 00:04:39,280 Speaker 1: on today? In the meantime, this is Laura. Thanks for listening, 79 00:04:39,920 --> 00:04:49,000 Speaker 1: and here's to making the most of our time. Hey, everybody, 80 00:04:49,200 --> 00:04:51,320 Speaker 1: I'd love to hear from you. You can send me 81 00:04:51,360 --> 00:04:55,000 Speaker 1: your tips, your questions, or anything else. Just connect with 82 00:04:55,040 --> 00:04:59,440 Speaker 1: me on Twitter, Facebook and Instagram at Before Breakfast Pod. 83 00:05:00,160 --> 00:05:04,479 Speaker 1: That's b E. The number four then Breakfast p o D. 84 00:05:05,320 --> 00:05:08,160 Speaker 1: You can also shoot me an email at before Breakfast 85 00:05:08,240 --> 00:05:11,640 Speaker 1: podcast at i heeart media dot com that before Breakfast 86 00:05:11,760 --> 00:05:14,320 Speaker 1: is spelled out with all the letters. Thanks so much, 87 00:05:14,560 --> 00:05:22,640 Speaker 1: I look forward to staying in touch. Before Breakfast is 88 00:05:22,640 --> 00:05:25,920 Speaker 1: a production of I heart Radio. 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