Speaker 1: Welcome. Uh oh huh, jan Benido.
Speaker 2: Okay, you veta tour guide. Let's go. What's up everybody?
Speaker 2: I'm a shutting out.
Speaker 3: This is Jordan Carlos clearly has been listening to Rosetta
Speaker 3: Stone and you guys are listening to Adulting.
Speaker 1: Dub it adulting. Mmm, I'm kind of excited. I have
Speaker 1: to say. My wife's coming to lunch with me today.
Speaker 2: Oh that's nice.
Speaker 1: Yeah, we've been doing that a lot. It's kind of
Speaker 1: like crazy, like, who are we right now?
Speaker 2: You're people that like to eat lunch? Why is that crazy?
Speaker 1: I don't know. We never got to do that before.
Speaker 1: You know, we just never have done this before, and
Speaker 1: now we're like doing it and it feels so ilicit.
Speaker 1: Now it feels good.
Speaker 2: Do you guys have a little glass of wine with lunch?
Speaker 2: Is that why it feels a little naughty?
Speaker 1: Yeah, you've done that before. Maybe a little cherry soda.
Speaker 1: Who knows what can happen?
Speaker 2: Oh, Chirley Temple, not Reddy, give me an extra cherry.
Speaker 2: I'm feeling salcy. I love it.
Speaker 3: I love a boozy lunch for no motherfucking reason. A
Speaker 3: salady swaza, give it your best shot. A name make that,
Speaker 3: bitch buttery, Okay.
Speaker 1: I know what you like. You like to go to
Speaker 1: that's like your spot. When you took me to, I
Speaker 1: was like, does she own a majority share of this?
Speaker 3: Now everyone's gonna go and see if I'm there, bitch,
Speaker 3: just get out. There's a lot of great restaurants in
Speaker 3: New York City, and that's like one thing I really
Speaker 3: do love about New York.
Speaker 2: Yes, so I've picked a couple.
Speaker 3: I have a favorite restaurant in each burrow, essentially, so
Speaker 3: if I have to meet somebody, we can meet up
Speaker 3: and I'm gonna have fun. I like to see familiar faces.
Speaker 3: I like to know what the chef is doing with
Speaker 3: their menu. I want to know what's in season and
Speaker 3: how you feel about that white asparagus.
Speaker 2: Let's go. Where is your cheesy cream sauce? Bitch?
Speaker 3: You know, I don't mind like a little oyster, you know,
Speaker 3: and apparently oysters are better.
Speaker 2: I think we talked about this in a month that
Speaker 2: ends in er.
Speaker 1: Oh really, I didn't know that. Did the oysters know?
Speaker 1: Is it the er and oyster? The er corresponds, that's beautiful.
Speaker 1: Oh my god, do.
Speaker 2: You guys see what I'm dealing with here? I didn't
Speaker 2: know that, do you guys didn't know what I'm dealing
Speaker 2: with here, but yeah, you know what I find too.
Speaker 3: It's like, yeah, married folks with kids and responsibilities and shit,
Speaker 3: sometimes it's just easier to get it popping.
Speaker 2: During the day.
Speaker 1: That's what it is.
Speaker 4: Like.
Speaker 3: A day lunch is just easier to connect than a
Speaker 3: date night because you got to like go through your
Speaker 3: whole day. Get the babysitter set up that bitch, you know,
Speaker 3: try to hide all your pop tarts and shit so
Speaker 3: she don't eat the good snacks. You know, this bitch's
Speaker 3: always looking for the last avocado. Talking about you said
Speaker 3: help yourself. You said help yourself to anything now, right,
Speaker 3: And so you have more energy during the day. I
Speaker 3: know I do, and I didn't before like five years ago.
Speaker 3: I was definitely a night owl. And now I'm just
Speaker 3: like give me to e am the rapid.
Speaker 1: I'm man, But I will say that the craziest thing
Speaker 1: that ever happened to me with the babysitter was they
Speaker 1: went into my fridge and then cooked something.
Speaker 2: No, ma'am, what the.
Speaker 1: Nok they cooked the steak?
Speaker 2: I am livid.
Speaker 3: Is this a family member or is this just like
Speaker 3: an Angie's list, witch.
Speaker 1: This is a this is a recommendation from a friend.
Speaker 1: And they were just like, They're like, I hope it's okay.
Speaker 3: No, you don't get the protein. I hope she was
Speaker 3: severely anemic. I hope her iron levels were low, because
Speaker 3: that is wild. What are you saying to my bloated,
Speaker 3: freckled face. I am no, we gotta we gotta talk Sean.
Speaker 1: King bone in al Sharpton bone in like marbleized steak.
Speaker 3: But she just cooked on the frying Did she wash
Speaker 3: the frying pan?
Speaker 1: I don't recall that happening. I just remember just being
Speaker 1: blinded with rage and being like what And then I
Speaker 1: had to pay you?
Speaker 3: On top of that, I had to pay you to
Speaker 3: eat my steak? What this is an OnlyFans bitch. I
Speaker 3: am so angry for you.
Speaker 2: I thought I.
Speaker 3: Really was going through it when I was doing nanny
Speaker 3: interviews and one of them came over and took a dump.
Speaker 1: Okay, well, that's just anxiety. People are nervous to get nervous.
Speaker 3: Yeah, maybe she was nervous. Maybe she had too much caffeine.
Speaker 3: Maybe she had some spicy food the night before. You know,
Speaker 3: I don't go in people's homes. And I don't go
Speaker 3: on airplanes. I just want to, I don't.
Speaker 1: I don't absolutely listen, it's a pressurized cabin. I get it,
Speaker 1: But like.
Speaker 2: Wait, are we talking about my butt or the airplane?
Speaker 1: Oh?
Speaker 3: You guys, I'm so much better than this, am I
Speaker 3: I'm questioning everything.
Speaker 1: She was just too nervous. The moment was too big,
Speaker 1: you know, That's what it is.
Speaker 2: Her moment was too big.
Speaker 1: God, damn, can I tell you something? Please? My kids? Now?
Speaker 1: You know how your eyes? Your eyes stay the same
Speaker 1: size your whole life. That's why kids are so cute.
Speaker 1: You see where I'm going with this? Do you see
Speaker 1: where I'm going with this? I hope he grows into
Speaker 1: his poops. I really do, because if they get any bigger,
Speaker 1: we have serious, serious plumbing.
Speaker 3: Pa, you can never get him the same. Also, they
Speaker 3: don't even finish all their food, so like how.
Speaker 1: I don't know, I don't know. I think it's just
Speaker 1: the efficiency of the young body. You know, it's just like,
Speaker 1: get out all the waste, all the waste we got,
Speaker 1: so then we know we got to I'm sorry, all right,
Speaker 1: no problem.
Speaker 3: Well you guys, we got a great episode coming up.
Speaker 2: Boy, we really got this one in the can.
Speaker 1: Okay, let's leave the bathroom.
Speaker 2: We'll leave the bathroom. Okay, we'll leave the bathroom. You guys,
Speaker 2: we're doing to.
Speaker 1: Save the bathroom. Oh my gosh.
Speaker 2: We need to be adults.
Speaker 1: We need to be Yes, we have to be adults.
Speaker 1: I wash my hands.
Speaker 3: I just got a wet white. Thanks everyone. Okay, yeah,
Speaker 3: don't forget to try just somebody's pants.
Speaker 2: Okay.
Speaker 3: Very excited about our guest this episode. No, really and
Speaker 3: truly because she's one of these people that I always
Speaker 3: I always see her name and her flyer at all
Speaker 3: the places I perform at in New York. We never
Speaker 3: had a chance to do a show together. She's so
Speaker 3: fucking dope. She's so fire, you know, she is an
Speaker 3: artist in every meeting of the word. I mean, bitches
Speaker 3: are calling her up and be like, Gene, can you
Speaker 3: come over to my house and go through my closet
Speaker 3: because I need to know what to do with these deads.
Speaker 3: She's like the friend you want to call when you
Speaker 3: want to run something by because she's so dope.
Speaker 2: You guys, shut the fuck.
Speaker 1: Up, Please give it up for the one and know me.
Speaker 3: Jean Gray put up We're not doing a live show,
Speaker 3: I know, but I like saying it.
Speaker 2: What are they giving it up on the subway?
Speaker 1: It's fun, you know. Somebody could be on a bicycle
Speaker 1: just like. Okay, like that?
Speaker 5: What's that program makes some motherfucking no? Okay, ys, look
Speaker 5: at you, bitch, Oh my goodness. Can I get to
Speaker 5: the top flights real quick? I want to see who
Speaker 5: is out on Oscar night not giving up flying?
Speaker 2: Fuck?
Speaker 1: Yeah, they don't care about the champagne carpet.
Speaker 2: I love it.
Speaker 4: Look we got a they b all boot up, this
Speaker 4: little couple right now.
Speaker 2: Look at you.
Speaker 4: I don't know.
Speaker 2: They got a clean sink in the kitchen. I like it.
Speaker 2: Can you turn my mic up a little bit? I'm
Speaker 2: not loud enough.
Speaker 3: Test test top titty mete. That's good, thank you? Oh
Speaker 3: my goodness. Look everyone looks yup.
Speaker 1: They look good, they look young. Look at these two
Speaker 1: right here. I know love these two right over here.
Speaker 3: You guys doing trying to make a new you're trying
Speaker 3: to rebrand my space. What the fuck are you doing
Speaker 3: with your ripped jeans and your little kneeledge hanging out?
Speaker 2: Little sexy fuck?
Speaker 1: Look did you meet at warby Parker or something like that.
Speaker 2: A clean nose ring.
Speaker 4: Everybody looks nice like they walk the ass.
Speaker 1: Well absolutely, these too, definitely have their bill set to
Speaker 1: auto pay. Look at these two.
Speaker 2: Look at these two.
Speaker 3: Did y'all get a babysitter or a dog sitter to
Speaker 3: be here? Kind of leave like the good grass out
Speaker 3: for the cat.
Speaker 1: Thanks for coming, Thanks for coming to the show.
Speaker 2: He's got his.
Speaker 3: Glasses on top of his head, ready for the bill. Oh,
Speaker 3: thank you, Marianne, our producer.
Speaker 1: Give it up. Please give it up for DJ down
Speaker 1: well over here as well.
Speaker 3: Give it up for Don Will's hair looking fly. Come
Speaker 3: on too, leaving conditioners. Somebody went to Target with the coupon.
Speaker 3: Give it up for the people on the side wearing masks,
Speaker 3: not trying to fuck up that day.
Speaker 2: At work tomorrow.
Speaker 1: Cheers.
Speaker 3: Yeah, you guys are responsible. I'll have shit to do tomorrow.
Speaker 3: So my face is out, bitch. So I'm wearing I'm
Speaker 3: wearing a black shirt? Is a podcast I inscribe. I know,
Speaker 3: thank you, but like it's been a day, so I'm like,
Speaker 3: this is what she's gonna wear, you.
Speaker 2: Know what I mean? Like fight, it does no stains,
Speaker 2: it looks nice. Let's keep it moving.
Speaker 3: It's a black button down shirt by Nina Parker and
Speaker 3: some black.
Speaker 2: Shoes and a black pant.
Speaker 3: And when my husband saw my outfit when I was
Speaker 3: leaving the house, He's like, no color and I'll I
Speaker 3: was like, that's what I say when.
Speaker 2: I go home to your mom's house.
Speaker 1: You know what I mean?
Speaker 2: Like, wow off, Yeah, that's what I'm saying.
Speaker 1: That's all those locations on the back though.
Speaker 3: So it's giving like bank manager in the front, but
Speaker 3: it's giving Lizzo's manager.
Speaker 2: In the back the back.
Speaker 4: Bitch in the back, back back back back.
Speaker 3: Back, pitch back, pitch back back back, backe bye bye back.
Speaker 2: You're welcome.
Speaker 1: Put your glasses down for that. They will steam up.
Speaker 1: They will steam up. And I am wearing some alow pants.
Speaker 2: This this is giving like Brooklyn Dad that knows the directions.
Speaker 4: This is great.
Speaker 1: Fun Brooklyn Dad, fun guy on the playground. I love it.
Speaker 3: I love I love an elevated casual look because it's
Speaker 3: definitely giving, Like you just got up graded from like,
Speaker 3: you know, a middle seat to like an aisle.
Speaker 1: Seat, you know what I mean, truly to comfort plus. Yes,
Speaker 1: I graduated from Maine to comfort plus. Yes, comfort plus
Speaker 1: to like business. But you still brought your quin Wa
Speaker 1: wrap with you. Oh truly that I bought Hudson News.
Speaker 4: Are you shopping now?
Speaker 2: You have new clothes?
Speaker 1: I am shopping now. I do have new clothes.
Speaker 4: Because this is.
Speaker 3: Adulting for you, I will say, because when we first
Speaker 3: started the show, it was the same tired jeans with
Speaker 3: like masking tape.
Speaker 1: We were kids. It was a different time, bitch.
Speaker 2: Please, I'm like, what got you all like shopping for
Speaker 2: yourself and whatnot?
Speaker 1: What got me shopping for myself? I don't know. I
Speaker 1: think just after COVID, I was like, I need to
Speaker 1: really reset. Yes, I need to say, hey I am
Speaker 1: a sexual being. Oh okay, wait, wait come back. I didn't.
Speaker 1: I didn't know.
Speaker 2: I didn't know what kind of reset we were doing.
Speaker 4: No.
Speaker 1: I just I was like, I have I have a
Speaker 1: lot more Like I wasn't trying and I was like
Speaker 1: paying too much attention, pouring too much into like how
Speaker 1: my kids looked and making sure you know, like that
Speaker 1: they were.
Speaker 3: Okay and you were with everybody else. But you gotta
Speaker 3: put your little fucking mask on your face first? Can
Speaker 3: we turn his mic up to I can't believe I
Speaker 3: said that but I need to hear more of you.
Speaker 1: Yeah, thanks, Bud, I just couldn't. I don't know. I
Speaker 1: get embarrassed talking about myself.
Speaker 3: Like you, it's my well favorite thing and you alsoddenly confrontation,
Speaker 3: which is very wild because your wife is from Brooklyn
Speaker 3: and I'm from Jersey.
Speaker 2: Is like, but that's why you have us in your life.
Speaker 1: Yes, I don't have to. I'm drawn to like assertive, aggressive,
Speaker 1: abrasive people. I love them. But you know what, Actually,
Speaker 1: I'm gonna tell you something though. I got into it
Speaker 1: with the cops this week. Yeah, what is in front
Speaker 1: of your kids? Not in front of my kids. I
Speaker 1: was coming back from a comedy show and uh, I
Speaker 1: pulled up to a light. There was a guy ahead
Speaker 1: of me. It was red, and then the light turned
Speaker 1: green and he didn't move in point to two seconds,
Speaker 1: and so I was like, and I laid on the horn.
Speaker 1: And then this drew the ire of a policeman who
Speaker 1: was like crossing the street against the light. And I
Speaker 1: didn't know who was coming towards me, but this person
Speaker 1: was like, first of all, they were like they were
Speaker 1: going real slow, real slow, And I was like, and
Speaker 1: I know that there's some fitness tests that cops have
Speaker 1: to take, but he didn't pass them. Very slow. Came
Speaker 1: up to me, big mustache, like a walrus mustache, and
Speaker 1: he's like, Roy, oh my god. I was like, all right,
Speaker 1: I rolled my window down. He's like, what are you
Speaker 1: hawking for? Like that? And I was like, because there
Speaker 1: was a car ahead of me and they didn't move
Speaker 1: in to two seconds?
Speaker 2: Din you hear from New York, you know why I
Speaker 2: was honking. Everybody doesn't do you know what I mean? Like,
Speaker 2: are you serious?
Speaker 1: Exactly? So I no, he did not. He was like
Speaker 1: pointy two seconds, and so I was like, that's why
Speaker 1: I did it. And then he goes he hears me
Speaker 1: say that, and then he goes, was there an emergency?
Speaker 2: Oh, we're having a moment right right, right right right?
Speaker 1: So I was like, I was like, I was like,
Speaker 1: what I'm gonna do in this moment? And sometimes listen,
Speaker 1: this is the only benefit for uh, for me for
Speaker 1: being raised in the suburbs, right, It's like being black,
Speaker 1: but raised in the suburbs, you know how to talk
Speaker 1: to authority figures. And so this is what I did.
Speaker 1: I said nothing, and I just smiled at him. I
Speaker 1: just smiled and smiled and smiled, and he's like, was
Speaker 1: there an emergency? This is a residential neighborhood. We don't
Speaker 1: honk around here. And I was like mm hmmm, hmm, yeah,
Speaker 1: mm hmmm. And then and then when he was done,
Speaker 1: I rolled my window back up and I went the
Speaker 1: fuck home. That does not happen for everybody. It does.
Speaker 1: I would recommend in that situation to pack a white
Speaker 1: witness if you can.
Speaker 2: But but I got, yeah, you're sassy.
Speaker 1: I'm not sasy.
Speaker 2: That's sassy.
Speaker 1: I'm not sassy. I know how to talk to the whites.
Speaker 1: You do.
Speaker 2: I was also raised in the suburbs that it wouldn't
Speaker 2: happen like that with me. It wouldn't. And I feel
Speaker 2: like this is a good tool to have.
Speaker 3: Say nothing, like you know, with a boss, in a
Speaker 3: relationship with the cop, like it's it really behooves you.
Speaker 1: Please behoove me? No ill behooves talking about say nothing.
Speaker 3: I can't though, because also my face says everything anyways,
Speaker 3: And I don't even know I'm rolling my eyes or
Speaker 3: kissing my teeth until my husband tells me. But yeah,
Speaker 3: I mean that's crazy, right, This is so, this is poetry.
Speaker 3: Don't start none, They'll beat like, why is he coming up?
Speaker 3: Isn't why is he coming up to you?
Speaker 1: He's coming out to me because he well he was
Speaker 1: on an ego trip, so he just did his thing.
Speaker 1: And then it was the moment was over. And then
Speaker 1: there were people behind me and you know what they
Speaker 1: were doing, honking. So it had to fucking end, you know.
Speaker 1: So I was like, Okay, I gotta go. Okay, I'm sorry,
Speaker 1: but I gotta go. Fuck yeah hy Sarah, yeah man. Anyway,
Speaker 1: I get I get nervous.
Speaker 3: I get very nervous, especially like when I go into
Speaker 3: a tunnel or go like on St. Bridge and you
Speaker 3: see like the cops just waiting to like maybe pull
Speaker 3: over like a truck that's got something suspicious. But I'm
Speaker 3: always just like I don't know, Like I suck in
Speaker 3: my stomach, like I'm taking a picture.
Speaker 2: I'm like, like, my body it just changes.
Speaker 1: Your body changes, it does.
Speaker 3: I should probably have a cop somewhere when I'm taking
Speaker 3: my pictures next time, because I'm just holding it.
Speaker 1: The fucking My week was crazy though, it was crazy
Speaker 1: that happened. Can I talk to him? Can I say
Speaker 1: something else? Sure?
Speaker 2: Should I sit down?
Speaker 1: I'm I may have hooked up with my wife three
Speaker 1: or four times this week. That airhorn was so long.
Speaker 2: We need just more airhorns.
Speaker 1: This is crazy.
Speaker 2: That's amazing, especially after how many.
Speaker 1: Years fifteen years together.
Speaker 3: So most of my friends that are like, I don't
Speaker 3: know if I should get married, I don't know, like
Speaker 3: if you know, I should commit to someone. A lot
Speaker 3: of them are worried that they're making them like it's
Speaker 3: a tattoo, Like will I be attract to this person
Speaker 3: for a very long time?
Speaker 1: Yes, you know what I mean?
Speaker 3: And then a lot of my friends in relationships figure
Speaker 3: out on understanding with an open relationship in case that happened.
Speaker 2: So everyone's happy, But I mean.
Speaker 6: It is.
Speaker 1: We got openers over here.
Speaker 2: We'll get to you in a minute.
Speaker 3: I like to know, like what like the rules are
Speaker 3: for everybody, because it definitely changes with every couple. We're
Speaker 3: not in an open relationship. But they talking to me,
Speaker 3: I was like, I know, if it feels right, do
Speaker 3: you If it doesn't feel good, then don't do it.
Speaker 3: That's like my general fucking thing. But all this to say,
Speaker 3: it's fascinating and fun that you're still attracted to each
Speaker 3: other and still get it in because you have to.
Speaker 3: I say this all the time. Bitches, we're not gonna
Speaker 3: be wet forever. You got to sit and spin while
Speaker 3: you can, you know what I mean. They don't teach
Speaker 3: us that in school. Look, there's people here. I'm so sorry,
Speaker 3: but you got the view. I think what it is
Speaker 3: is she can't help but be attracted to my mammentlian thing.
Speaker 1: God that I am just a smokestack beef castle and
Speaker 1: she can't edible. Okay, you see my wife, she's beautiful.
Speaker 1: You know, she's so gorgeous. Yeah, she's still gorgeous. And
Speaker 1: she's got a lob. Now she looks good. That's a
Speaker 1: long bob.
Speaker 3: Kids, all right, Oh my god, I was like I
Speaker 3: didn't even know something else. Okay, cool, No, no.
Speaker 1: I think I think what's important is that, like we
Speaker 1: try to go out on date nights and stuff like that,
Speaker 1: make sure that it's fun and spicy and take edibles
Speaker 1: and and yeah, and there is a lock on our door,
Speaker 1: so it's cool.
Speaker 2: Oh yeah, a lock.
Speaker 1: I don't know.
Speaker 3: My kids are so young, it's like, yeah, you know,
Speaker 3: everything is like a panic room for them anyways, and
Speaker 3: they can't figure it out.
Speaker 2: So it really is fine.
Speaker 4: Do you know what I mean?
Speaker 3: Like, they're not coming to my room. I could, I
Speaker 3: could tell them it's like broccoli in my bedroom. They're
Speaker 3: like not going in. I'm like bye bye, you know
Speaker 3: what I mean. Like I just put on Netflix. I
Speaker 3: put on my special, they watch it.
Speaker 1: Just kidding.
Speaker 3: Gotta get them numbers where I get. That's fu a while,
Speaker 3: But that is a very fucking exday. I also think
Speaker 3: it's important when you're in a long term relationship to
Speaker 3: let your partner do them. You know, my husband went
Speaker 3: on a ski trip in January and came back refreshed
Speaker 3: as fuck. I'm like, Okay, sometimes it's not a like
Speaker 3: day at the nail place or a spot like sometimes
Speaker 3: you have to like go off and do something without
Speaker 3: your partner to come back to appreciate them.
Speaker 1: Oh truly, you know what I mean. Aren't you going?
Speaker 1: You're going on like on a girl's trip.
Speaker 2: Yeah, I'm going on a girl's trip to Jamaica.
Speaker 1: See do you Mother's Day.
Speaker 3: We're gonna have our teddies out. It's gonna be fun
Speaker 3: and buy out like you know on a tankini.
Speaker 1: No big deal. You know what I mean.
Speaker 3: You're gonna, uh Montie, We're gonna fly to Montego Bay,
Speaker 3: but we're gonna drive to the grill.
Speaker 1: There you go.
Speaker 2: Yeah, okay, Christopher Columbus, What else do you want to know?
Speaker 2: I'm not trying to put all my business out there
Speaker 2: on the podcast.
Speaker 1: Which hotel? Which room?
Speaker 3: I got a new Netflix special? It's not don't fuck
Speaker 3: with cass is like, don't fuck with my pussy, you.
Speaker 1: Know what I mean?
Speaker 2: Like, No, I don't want to let people know where
Speaker 2: I'm at. That's scary. That's another thing.
Speaker 3: Please don't put your location all up on fucking Instagram.
Speaker 2: That's crazy. Why would you do that?
Speaker 3: People are wild and bored. They'll come, They fucking will.
Speaker 3: People are like, oh, I'm not you know, you might
Speaker 3: say I'm not famous. Who's gonna come stay?
Speaker 1: You don't know.
Speaker 3: You don't know who's gonna come stalk your fine ass,
Speaker 3: you know what I mean? Like, let's not fuck around
Speaker 3: and find out, especially after hosting five seasons of The
Speaker 3: Circle on Netflix.
Speaker 2: Excuse me.
Speaker 6: So much.
Speaker 2: It's really an airhorn for me paying taxes.
Speaker 1: But like, do you have you have stocky type people
Speaker 1: now in your life?
Speaker 2: Besides my mom? Let me think? Yeah, yeah, it's okay.
Speaker 1: I feel like You know.
Speaker 3: This sounds so crazy, but everybody just needs to be loved.
Speaker 3: You need to be loved in like your formative years
Speaker 3: to like really fucking understand like how to navigate your life,
Speaker 3: you know what I mean, Like you you have to
Speaker 3: really like like yourself and not have to like. Yeah,
Speaker 3: the people who like try to follow me to like
Speaker 3: Chili's or whatever, what you can tell that they weren't
Speaker 3: Not only were they not popular, they were probably bullied.
Speaker 3: And I went to three different high schools, so I
Speaker 3: was bullied a lot, you know what I mean.
Speaker 2: Yeah, I'm from Jersey.
Speaker 3: Like you learn how to fight, like before you learn
Speaker 3: how to write your name, you know what I mean,
Speaker 3: It's why gotcha?
Speaker 1: Yeah yeah, So you're saying that they kind of like
Speaker 1: they're broken and they that's why they latch on. Yeah
Speaker 1: yeah yeah.
Speaker 2: It isn't like single light skinned female like I want
Speaker 2: to tell jokes too, you know what I mean. It
Speaker 2: isn't like I feel you just said that shit at all.
Speaker 2: But I also we got to get to the show.
Speaker 3: But like I just want to say, we had a
Speaker 3: guest on the show a couple of years ago called
Speaker 3: Her name is Naomi Echa Paragin she's hilarious. Yeah, she's
Speaker 3: so fucking good. We like roasted her a bit because
Speaker 3: you know, she's been in a relationship over ten years
Speaker 3: long time, and has been engaged for like eight years
Speaker 3: long time, and so we're just like, you've had like
Speaker 3: three one hour specials in the time, what's it gonna happen?
Speaker 2: And she finally made it happen but yesterday, and it
Speaker 2: was very fucking adorable. It was adorable.
Speaker 1: It's that you love to see it.
Speaker 2: You love to see it.
Speaker 1: One loves to see it. What there's a are you okay?
Speaker 1: There's answer is no, not okay, there's an idiom idiom.
Speaker 1: You love to see it? Right, yes, And when you
Speaker 1: hear good news, you say you love to see it.
Speaker 2: I know that's what you said.
Speaker 1: Yeah, yeah, I just want I feel crazy. These are
Speaker 1: your final moments, Michelle. What's say that words have power?
Speaker 3: I do not smell toes. Oh my god, before I die,
Speaker 3: let's get to our first guests. Everybody, Yes, Oh my god,
Speaker 3: they're so fucking dope dope. Former rapper, yes, full time artist, Yes,
Speaker 3: I mean dope fly New York by way of South Africa.
Speaker 2: What the fuck more do you need?
Speaker 1: Please? Give it up for good.
Speaker 2: Oh my goodness, look at that we got New Chiss.
Speaker 4: I feel like both of us as your security.
Speaker 2: Yes, really coming through. Really had to tell Black, it's
Speaker 2: just giving assertiveness.
Speaker 4: It's giving New York. It's giving full on, it's.
Speaker 3: Giving Black reboot, diehard. Oh Christmas party, Let's figure out
Speaker 3: where the terrorists are.
Speaker 2: And one of the terror was South African.
Speaker 4: So I am down to kill anyone at any point
Speaker 4: in time, Christmas or no Christmas.
Speaker 2: Do you have you gotten into fistfights before? Yeah, I'm
Speaker 2: from New York.
Speaker 1: What was your best fist fight?
Speaker 2: Oh shit? Oh oh shit, we're just going out.
Speaker 4: Yeah, no, this is a good way to start.
Speaker 1: Fights.
Speaker 4: I don't necessarily know. I'm okay. Here's the thing. I'm
Speaker 4: unusually strong. Yes, sometimes I surprised myself and I think
Speaker 4: the last it wasn't a fight. But she was a
Speaker 4: very small girl at the time, and she underestimated me,
Speaker 4: and I, damn it, I picked her up and I huh,
Speaker 4: I hung her on a fence.
Speaker 2: What what what in this Jackson is going on? Can
Speaker 2: you please walk me through the moments?
Speaker 1: Rod Iron? What did you what do you mean? She was?
Speaker 4: She was doing a lot of in my face movements,
Speaker 4: which I feel like, you know, it feels like when
Speaker 4: like a small dog is yapping at you and you're
Speaker 4: just like, I just want this to stop. And I
Speaker 4: felt like a fight would be an unfair move. And
Speaker 4: we were in this is in nineties, this is Clinton Hill,
Speaker 4: and there were you know, there's a lot of great fences.
Speaker 2: To hang people.
Speaker 1: I'm talking about you're telling a cyclone fence or a
Speaker 1: rod iron fence or a rod iron fence. Paint the picture,
Speaker 1: Thank you so much.
Speaker 4: Okay, So I just picked her up and I put
Speaker 4: her away. Yeah, would she like come back and get me?
Speaker 1: No.
Speaker 4: She had two friends who were with her, but she
Speaker 4: was like swinging like why I want us? And I
Speaker 4: was like, and they just left.
Speaker 2: They left her. Wow, Oh I hope they're off her
Speaker 2: Christmas list. That's not nice.
Speaker 4: Yeah.
Speaker 1: Wait, were her legs just kicking in the air like
Speaker 1: this kind of thing? Yeah?
Speaker 2: Oh you are very strong.
Speaker 4: Yeah, I mean, to be fair, she is maybe like
Speaker 4: one hundred pounds.
Speaker 2: He was very one hundred pounds is still a Yeah.
Speaker 3: You gotta definitely go with your knees and put your
Speaker 3: back into it and lean like you're about.
Speaker 4: To say one hundred pounds of like crazy New York
Speaker 4: Kid though, because you never know what's gonna happen. Like
Speaker 4: in a mob deep song Prodigy very RPI Prodigy started
Speaker 4: like a line that says, I'll throw a TV at
Speaker 4: you crazy, and I was always like, how's he gonna
Speaker 4: pick that TV up?
Speaker 3: Yeah, so many questions about rapping right when you were little?
Speaker 3: Did shit just like come in your mind? You're like,
Speaker 3: I have to say it like this, I have to
Speaker 3: write it down, Like you can't sleep at night because
Speaker 3: you're just thinking of like lyrics and words and just
Speaker 3: shit like that.
Speaker 4: That would be horrible. No, I was when I was
Speaker 4: very young. My first career. I've had many careers and lives.
Speaker 4: My first career was as a dancer. I was one
Speaker 4: of the youngest dancers in the second company of Alvin Allen.
Speaker 2: So, wow, thanks.
Speaker 3: Guys, what a power of that? I mean, were you
Speaker 3: forced to be a certain size? Did everybody accept everybody
Speaker 3: for who they.
Speaker 2: Are and what they look like.
Speaker 4: I think in the world of dance and especially I
Speaker 4: did a lot of things. I was into like Katherine
Speaker 4: Dunham dance. I was studying that in modern dance and ballet.
Speaker 4: I sort of knew early on on. First of all,
Speaker 4: dance is a very short fucking career that I was like,
Speaker 4: I don't think my body is built for this.
Speaker 2: Yeah.
Speaker 1: I felt the same way as a child. I was
Speaker 1: going to ask you when I I did one grande
Speaker 1: when I was a child, and I.
Speaker 2: Felt, why do you know these terms?
Speaker 1: Well? I know as well.
Speaker 4: You know, do you know any any of the Are
Speaker 4: you just finding this out right now?
Speaker 1: No?
Speaker 2: He wasn't a dancer. He just likes to learn stuff.
Speaker 1: I'm a private dancer. Okay, wife his.
Speaker 4: Wife three to four times a week any.
Speaker 2: Home will do.
Speaker 1: I'm proud.
Speaker 2: What part of the song was that.
Speaker 1: Proud? We're paying attention?
Speaker 3: She's like, those are the ad libs that he What
Speaker 3: I do love about pop stars is like leaning on
Speaker 3: all the other things they could do, you know what
Speaker 3: I mean. And when I watched Jennifer Lopez do anything,
Speaker 3: it overwhelms me in a way that I really I'm like,
Speaker 3: kudos to that bitch. Also, I never want to do
Speaker 3: that because it's just like like it just seems like
Speaker 3: she never has a thought.
Speaker 1: She like.
Speaker 3: Like that that is catch me, catch me, and then
Speaker 3: like a ce note and I'm like, and then people
Speaker 3: are like, it was okay.
Speaker 2: I'm like, it was okay. Look at how knee.
Speaker 4: That is also, by far the best j Lowe impression.
Speaker 2: I know it's a podcast, but.
Speaker 4: Y'all, really they have a movements. I agree, I am
Speaker 4: Joe and Jennifer Lopez does some stuff and then there's
Speaker 4: other stuff you're like, yeah, that's not the stuff.
Speaker 3: Also, Janet Jackson out here doesn't have to be touring
Speaker 3: right now, no, but just loves it so much. And
Speaker 3: I feel like I'm also at that age where I
Speaker 3: need to see people before they retire and or die.
Speaker 1: Yeah.
Speaker 2: Who who's on your ears? Lionel Richie?
Speaker 4: How old is Lionel Richie?
Speaker 1: Hello, I got seventy?
Speaker 3: Yeah, yeah, I can't wait to see his like tailor
Speaker 3: blazer and his square jaw.
Speaker 2: It's great that.
Speaker 4: Man got a Joel. But you know who knew how square?
Speaker 4: Linel Richie's Joel who? I don't know if you're familiar
Speaker 4: with video for Hello, oh yeah, but she really concentrated
Speaker 4: on the jaw car of the sculpture. And if you
Speaker 4: don't know what I'm talking about, google it.
Speaker 2: When you get it's the fact at Sun Lemons, google.
Speaker 1: It the blind woman is sculpting, Yeah, lionel Richie's head
Speaker 1: and makes him look like a lion or something like that.
Speaker 2: Right, Yeah, yeah, it's giving lion, it's giving Leo energy.
Speaker 1: Yeah, it's giving lion. No Ridge.
Speaker 2: Wait, So what I love about this time now?
Speaker 3: Like twenty twenty three, I've never known so many female
Speaker 3: mcs to exist. Yeah, with Spotify accounts like hopefully making money.
Speaker 3: I've also like never heard so many women talk about
Speaker 3: how what the pussy is.
Speaker 4: Yeah, there is a lot of great sexual freedom. I
Speaker 4: think what was interesting for me was I'm like, I
Speaker 4: had songs about sex, but because I wasn't dressing in
Speaker 4: a certain way, I tended to get like very asexualized.
Speaker 4: And men would be like, that's why we like her,
Speaker 4: and I'm like, most of these songs are either about
Speaker 4: murders or fucking or fucking and then murdering. It's just
Speaker 4: that the visual to you is all you're getting and
Speaker 4: you can't like process the other shit. And would consistently
Speaker 4: hit me against women who were owning their sexuality and
Speaker 4: I'm like, no, no, that's not the fucking deal at all.
Speaker 4: Get you pussy, but everybody, Yeah, yeah, what do you
Speaker 4: think is lacking in music today, the same thing that's
Speaker 4: generally been lacking. I think there's always a misunderstanding of
Speaker 4: how hard independent artists work and being like, you know,
Speaker 4: there's always an equation of sales to success. And what
Speaker 4: I always want to tell everyone is, you know, it
Speaker 4: doesn't have to be this way. You can like who
Speaker 4: you like and support who you want to support. And
Speaker 4: I think we definitely live in a day where you know,
Speaker 4: if you're just on SoundCloud or you're on YouTube, you
Speaker 4: don't need these labels to do it. You don't need
Speaker 4: to have Spotify. And I wish everyone out there if
Speaker 4: you like some independent artists and they're selling some shit
Speaker 4: on their own or on their website, go fucking buy
Speaker 4: it from them, buy it directly from them, because there's
Speaker 4: so many talented people who just fucking quit and they're like,
Speaker 4: I just don't want to do this anymore. So you know,
Speaker 4: be the change that you want to see.
Speaker 1: Yeah, what about what about the artists that are pushing
Speaker 1: their CDs in Harold Square?
Speaker 4: And if that still I mean, yeh fuck yes, no
Speaker 4: I'm not.
Speaker 1: Last week a CD a CD And I said, where
Speaker 1: did you get a CD? Who?
Speaker 4: Someone's burning CD at home?
Speaker 1: How you can still burn CD?
Speaker 2: People are still making guava drinks and selling them like
Speaker 2: at the red light Michelle? What sometimes animal juice? It's delicious?
Speaker 1: Where where are you getting.
Speaker 2: The bronx? Noways checks out?
Speaker 4: Checks out?
Speaker 1: Yeah? Is it wile?
Speaker 4: The juice? And then like nutcrackers in the summer, I'm
Speaker 4: open have have you had a nutcracker? What are we
Speaker 4: talking about?
Speaker 1: I've heard tell of a nutcracker, but I don't know
Speaker 1: what goes into a nutcracker?
Speaker 2: What are we talking about?
Speaker 1: Drinks?
Speaker 4: Right? Fair question. I think the better question is like,
Speaker 4: what doesn't go into a nutcracker?
Speaker 2: What are we talking about?
Speaker 4: Yeah?
Speaker 2: Again, fair fucking question. I have a question for you.
Speaker 2: You've worked with your husband? How the fuck does that go?
Speaker 4: I am Jenneral don't like working with people? Right, I'm not.
Speaker 2: I'm not a people person.
Speaker 4: I know that I like I present as very friendly
Speaker 4: as guys. You wanna you want to hang out? You
Speaker 4: want to?
Speaker 1: I want to hang out with you?
Speaker 2: You don't you know that? Like, don't fuck around? You
Speaker 2: would think so.
Speaker 4: But I'm also uh. I've seen it described just this
Speaker 4: week on TikTok as someone who has very inviting energy.
Speaker 4: So I thought the tattoos would make it stop.
Speaker 2: Yes, and they did not.
Speaker 4: They made it worse.
Speaker 2: Yes, people want to know.
Speaker 4: People want to People want to tell me all their deepest,
Speaker 4: darkest secrets, and especially older white women really like to
Speaker 4: show me all of their hidden tattoos.
Speaker 2: Karen, that's a no. Yeah, it's all a no.
Speaker 4: Working with your spouse, your partner, it depends if you
Speaker 4: both can work on the same level. I'm a very
Speaker 4: anxious I like to get shit in on time. I
Speaker 4: like shit to get done. I am. I'm an artist,
Speaker 4: but I'm also like I like the business of it.
Speaker 1: Yeah.
Speaker 4: I like to write a strongly worded email.
Speaker 1: I liked.
Speaker 2: I like to show up and be like, where the fuck.
Speaker 4: Is my money? Yeah, you know, And he's not he's
Speaker 4: he's very lovely.
Speaker 1: Yeah.
Speaker 2: So it was a struggle.
Speaker 1: Yeah.
Speaker 3: My husband and I own a furniture store together. Yeah,
Speaker 3: and he really is like Rainman when it comes to furniture,
Speaker 3: And I'm like, how do you remember this nineteen seventy
Speaker 3: two cherry wood fucking whatever the fuck? But you can't
Speaker 3: remember recycling on Thursday.
Speaker 1: That is a thing.
Speaker 4: That is a thing. I think him as a person
Speaker 4: who's like really into his art and very free with it.
Speaker 4: But I'm also like, what about the fucking chores, bitch.
Speaker 2: We gotta get to the questions.
Speaker 3: But I just want to since we were talking about
Speaker 3: just like white women really just trying to bond because
Speaker 3: I thought, let's go. I co host the Today Show.
Speaker 3: Sometimes I'm just like, this isn't me, but.
Speaker 2: It's inviting.
Speaker 3: I know, my body's like a typopedic mattress, so people
Speaker 3: are like, I want to hug it and lay on
Speaker 3: it and put a lot of wine on it and
Speaker 3: hope it doesn't spill. But like, what I am trying
Speaker 3: to say is like language vocabulary. My mom never was
Speaker 3: able to really give me the language of like, because
Speaker 3: it's like micro dosing racism and and and being inappropriate
Speaker 3: when someone like wants to touch your hair, wants to
Speaker 3: count your freckles, wants to be like, you're black, But
Speaker 3: how'd you get so light like when they asked you
Speaker 3: like that?
Speaker 2: So what do you say?
Speaker 3: What do you say to people when they want to
Speaker 3: like just ask you some shit that's really inappropriate or
Speaker 3: touch you?
Speaker 1: Or no?
Speaker 4: It's either it's either no, I do like a no
Speaker 4: thank you or none for me.
Speaker 2: I love it.
Speaker 1: I love it.
Speaker 3: Okay, let's get to some questions. You guys got a
Speaker 3: lot of questions, and I do appreciate you. Y'all got
Speaker 3: a lot of feelings. And where do you put them
Speaker 3: in there in the bowl?
Speaker 2: Oh god? At what point do I throw out my
Speaker 2: stained underwear?
Speaker 4: What?
Speaker 2: Why the fuck?
Speaker 1: What kind of a stain are we talking about? No?
Speaker 4: What?
Speaker 1: Thank you? Wait? Who this guy? This guy just just
Speaker 1: like yep, I hear you? Is a green with you?
Speaker 1: Yeah he understands. Okay, so what were we talking about?
Speaker 1: An animal? Vegetable? Mineral? Like? What kind of a stain
Speaker 1: are we talking about? Able?
Speaker 4: Is it like uh uh, your your period panties?
Speaker 2: That my follow whip is?
Speaker 1: I don't need to know?
Speaker 2: Yeah, none of that, No, thank you?
Speaker 4: None for me.
Speaker 1: I think if it's you're not going out underwear, then
Speaker 1: like you're sexy underwear. You know what I'm saying. Like,
Speaker 1: if you have an underwear that has a stain it
Speaker 1: looks like the shroud of Turn, then you should probably nerds.
Speaker 1: Then you should probably throw it away.
Speaker 3: Okay, here's the deal. If you have a stain or
Speaker 3: a hole, throw it away. You can go to Target
Speaker 3: and get like like five for twenty. Treat yourself just
Speaker 3: three for ten. Look you know what I mean, because
Speaker 3: then you're gonna look at it all the time.
Speaker 2: And be like, oh, what's the one?
Speaker 1: What the s?
Speaker 2: No, just could throw them all away and he just
Speaker 2: gets you underwear.
Speaker 4: Here's here's the deal. If you fucking die.
Speaker 1: Right, okay, go on and either if I die, if.
Speaker 4: You die soon, because we can die at any time.
Speaker 1: Yeah, okay, and.
Speaker 4: You got a drawer full of weird stained underwear, or
Speaker 4: you're wearing the weird stained underwear.
Speaker 2: You don't want that that you don't want people to
Speaker 2: remember you that way.
Speaker 1: That's a good that's a valid point. Can you use
Speaker 1: them as cleaning rags? Though? Think about that when you
Speaker 1: went home. Next question es what god, wow, how do
Speaker 1: I convince my husband to have a second child? Oh
Speaker 1: my god?
Speaker 2: Oh this is not a question to me again.
Speaker 4: No children, no, thank you?
Speaker 1: Yeah. How do you convince someone to have a second child?
Speaker 1: That's a great question.
Speaker 2: That's hard.
Speaker 1: I I don't know if there's a good time for anything,
Speaker 1: you know, So it's just like.
Speaker 2: Well, the time is now. Like if you have pep
Speaker 2: in your step and breath in your body, this is
Speaker 2: your prime.
Speaker 1: You fucking do it.
Speaker 3: The thing is, even when people are like, this should
Speaker 3: be a conversation before you get together. Some people don't
Speaker 3: want kids, and then they're with someone, they're like, oh shit, yeah,
Speaker 3: you know, I see the future in your eyes.
Speaker 2: Here we are, you know what I mean?
Speaker 3: And so I feel like I would definitely bring in
Speaker 3: a therapist because I want to know what husband says
Speaker 3: and feels. I want to know what you say and
Speaker 3: feel like it could work out. But you know, having
Speaker 3: a kid to fill a void is yeah, no, that's wild.
Speaker 3: You should like go to Alvin Ali and take a class.
Speaker 4: Yeah, go to Alvin Alien. And just in general, if
Speaker 4: you're in a relationship, you should probably have a couple
Speaker 4: of seraphas. Anyway, Yeah, that part just on my deck.
Speaker 3: That's right, because if some this is the last thing
Speaker 3: I'll say. If something is going on in your relationship
Speaker 3: and it's already cracked, right, A kid is so much work.
Speaker 3: You're just gonna put something very heavy on it and
Speaker 3: it'll break.
Speaker 4: M Well, that's the end of the show.
Speaker 1: Guys. We should question ask questions.
Speaker 4: I didn't know. I didn't know we were answering questions
Speaker 4: for real.
Speaker 2: Sorry, back to the.
Speaker 3: Oh, what's the best side? Hustle dash, low energy? What
Speaker 3: what take pictures of your feet and put them on OnlyFans? Now,
Speaker 3: now that being said, the market is flooded, So what
Speaker 3: can you do to.
Speaker 2: Make your feet special?
Speaker 4: A puppet show Marcel the Shell is nominated tonight.
Speaker 2: Out here creative? What's the question, Jordan?
Speaker 1: Should forty year old men do recreational LSD to help
Speaker 1: with creativity? Should?
Speaker 4: What?
Speaker 1: Should forty year old men do recreational LSD to help
Speaker 1: with creativity?
Speaker 3: I think every white man over forty should do LSD,
Speaker 3: especially if they're making laws about people's bodies, mainly in
Speaker 3: let's stop, I.
Speaker 2: Don't answer questions about men. I'm tired. Oh this is
Speaker 2: a cute question.
Speaker 3: At what age do I stop taking paper towels and
Speaker 3: lifthol wipes.
Speaker 2: From my mom's house when I visit?
Speaker 1: Never?
Speaker 4: Never, never, never ever.
Speaker 1: That's why she ad buys them.
Speaker 4: So you come over, honor it, honor it, cherish it
Speaker 4: anything your mom ever gives you in a dumb ass
Speaker 4: care pass.
Speaker 1: Yes, these have.
Speaker 2: No Yeah, I love it so much. Okay, let's see.
Speaker 4: Oh no, I got two questions the same.
Speaker 3: Oh this is supplicated I'm twenty eight and gay.
Speaker 2: Congratulations that's me. It's my question. Never been in an
Speaker 2: adult relationship?
Speaker 4: Good for you?
Speaker 3: How do I navigate it? I just started dating the
Speaker 3: world's hottest guy.
Speaker 1: Oh well, Airhorn, thank you, congratulations, very show us the
Speaker 1: world's hottest guy.
Speaker 2: Show us this man look as a former hoe hoe
Speaker 2: and spirit.
Speaker 3: I will say, like, do it all so you're not
Speaker 3: like completely focused on one person and just like really
Speaker 3: enjoy the different parts of people. And then when you
Speaker 3: feel like, oh, I'm done talking to four to six
Speaker 3: people this month about my day and you want to focus.
Speaker 4: On one to two. That's nice.
Speaker 2: Why are you looking at me like that?
Speaker 4: Then do that?
Speaker 2: But like, yeah, what is an adult relationship to you?
Speaker 3: Because I feel like a lot of my friends in
Speaker 3: their thirties and forties are dating and they don't know
Speaker 3: how to like just break it off with someone after
Speaker 3: one or two dates or like one or two hangouts.
Speaker 3: Like adult relationship is also like not ghosting someone and
Speaker 3: telling someone I'm not interested, you know what I mean?
Speaker 4: So the adult relationship is like really with yourself. I
Speaker 4: think we all have an idea when we're young, and
Speaker 4: especially like late twenties, early thirties about what an adult
Speaker 4: is supposed to be, what an adult is supposed to
Speaker 4: look like, what an adult relationship is. And I'm gonna
Speaker 4: tell you you kind of always never really see yourself
Speaker 4: that way. You're always kind of cause plan and be like,
Speaker 4: I'm a grown up, right, so you know, enjoy yourself.
Speaker 4: It's a you got the most energy you're ever gonna have.
Speaker 4: Enjoy the hottest man on earth.
Speaker 3: Also, you're a hot man too, so yeah, don't don't
Speaker 3: be giving him all your power and all your cookies
Speaker 3: like you yeah, able to.
Speaker 1: I just I want to say this, I've never not
Speaker 1: been the hot one in a relationship.
Speaker 2: Oh god.
Speaker 1: But let me just say, oh god.
Speaker 6: That if if I if the peanut, if the shoe
Speaker 6: were on the other foot, I can imagine that you
Speaker 6: would be like tap dancing and making sure that they
Speaker 6: were really happy all the time, and that that can
Speaker 6: cause a lot of stress.
Speaker 1: So just be yourself in all this as much as
Speaker 1: you can be and know that you have. Even though
Speaker 1: you might not think you're as hot as this other person,
Speaker 1: you're attractive nonetheless.
Speaker 2: Yeah, it's chemistry. You talk. You're always a hot motherfucker.
Speaker 4: You're always the hottest motherfucker in the room, in the
Speaker 4: relations ship, in the building, wherever the fuck you go.
Speaker 4: Everyone should feel.
Speaker 2: Like that all the time. And if you don't fake
Speaker 2: it till you make it, because you will get there at.
Speaker 3: A certain point, it'll be like you don't you just
Speaker 3: go walk in every room like fucking Billy Porter at
Speaker 3: the Grammy and be like, what's.
Speaker 4: All you standing there crying in the mirror and being like.
Speaker 2: Yeah, with like fringe on your hat, It'll be great. Okay.
Speaker 3: This actually leads into this question, at what point will
Speaker 3: I stop questioning a guy genuinely liking me and being
Speaker 3: kind to me?
Speaker 2: Hashtag jaded in New York City? Who is this bitch?
Speaker 3: And can I motivoat you right away? Your worth does
Speaker 3: not depend on other people liking you.
Speaker 1: Ever, this person did not clap at that.
Speaker 4: He was like that.
Speaker 2: Valid man.
Speaker 3: Can I just say just practice getting off of Instagram?
Speaker 3: Get off Instagram it's not fucking real, and just have
Speaker 3: some like real fucking connections with people, especially yourself.
Speaker 2: Yep, you know what I mean? Like whatever that is.
Speaker 2: And if you can just jerk off every.
Speaker 4: Day, yeah you may get wraw, but you know, get
Speaker 4: in there. You were you were talking earlier about liking yourself.
Speaker 4: I just had a conversation tonight. I was like, there's
Speaker 4: a real difference between loving yourself and liking yourself. And
Speaker 4: I might not every day love all of the things
Speaker 4: about me, but I fucking like myself, yes, all the
Speaker 4: fucking time.
Speaker 2: Yes, you know it's important.
Speaker 1: Do you like yourself every day? I like myself every day.
Speaker 1: I like myself a lot. Oh yeah, yeah, sometimes I
Speaker 1: like myself until it's raw, you know what I'm saying.
Speaker 4: No, No, I've never not wanted an airhorn to punctuate
Speaker 4: a sentence.
Speaker 2: Oh my god, we can't addle that. Jordan's okay, Oh
Speaker 2: my god, how is it gonna be? Please?
Speaker 1: Should I say for a house or focused on saving
Speaker 1: and spending my money on travel and making memories?
Speaker 4: Travel and make motherfucking memories. This country has sold you
Speaker 4: that you need to be living some sort of a
Speaker 4: life where you get married, you have a kid, you
Speaker 4: buy a house. That that is a thing to fucking do.
Speaker 4: The thing is about you and your adventure and your
Speaker 4: journey and connection. Have a good fucking time, get out there.
Speaker 4: Travel experienced racism in other lands. It's not the same
Speaker 4: as here. You're not gonna know what to expect. You
Speaker 4: just want to go out and have a good time,
Speaker 4: and people think you a sex worker, but you were
Speaker 4: just trying to have a good.
Speaker 2: Time in Italy.
Speaker 4: Wow, have a good fucking time so that you can
Speaker 4: come back and then decide if you want those things
Speaker 4: or not. Oh my god, I love it.
Speaker 2: Okay, we have time for one more.
Speaker 3: How has your relationship with your parents or siblings changed
Speaker 3: as you've gotten older.
Speaker 2: Well, I'm only child, so fuck everybody.
Speaker 4: I'm not an only child, okay, and also fuck everybody.
Speaker 4: There's a point. I have an older brother, he's a
Speaker 4: piece of shit, and then my dad also a piece
Speaker 4: of shit. Yeah, my mom passed on, and at a
Speaker 4: certain point in life I was like, I'm okay with
Speaker 4: you being a piece of shit. You just can't be
Speaker 4: a piece of shit around me, you know. Yeah, Like
Speaker 4: I feel like that deserves bigger applause and me an airhorn. Yeah,
Speaker 4: I know.
Speaker 2: Boundaries.
Speaker 3: Boundary boundaries are a motherfucker because it is like a job,
Speaker 3: like you put in the time and still nothing's changed,
Speaker 3: so you're going to walk away. Yes, And I've always
Speaker 3: admired people like that. I've met in college, right out
Speaker 3: of college who just knew who their parents were, and
Speaker 3: they're like, I'm good on it. And I'm like, damn,
Speaker 3: you know what I mean?
Speaker 2: That is so powerful.
Speaker 3: I don't think I really knew or accepted that my
Speaker 3: parents and I love each other, but we're just very
Speaker 3: different and they'll never like understand me.
Speaker 2: So I was like thirty.
Speaker 3: And that's because I was in love, and so I
Speaker 3: was like, oh my goodness, I'm I'm not a different
Speaker 3: person with my husband. I'm my most true ist self.
Speaker 3: And he's like, why do you change? Why do you
Speaker 3: diminish yourself? Why do you like, why are you not
Speaker 3: as loud and do the things that you.
Speaker 2: Usually do around your parents.
Speaker 4: I'm just like, that's a good ask question because anyone,
Speaker 4: anyone that you get around and you notice yourself not
Speaker 4: being full of yourself, whether it's your parents or not,
Speaker 4: they gotta go, yeah, you gotta that's gotta end.
Speaker 2: That's right, you know what. Let me just leave Jordan,
Speaker 2: this is I'm.
Speaker 1: No, I'm just kidding. I was just gonna say that.
Speaker 1: The Japanese say that we were a different person in
Speaker 1: every room that we enter. But oh God has.
Speaker 2: God Jesus, I know, welcome to my world.
Speaker 4: For me.
Speaker 1: As I've aged father, uh and I have a much
Speaker 1: more deeper respect for one another. My father now sees
Speaker 1: me as a whole person.
Speaker 4: Do you see him also as a whole person? Story?
Speaker 2: When he starts talking like Obama, I'm like, what is this?
Speaker 1: I'm gonna say, braiker than me. Now, he's weaker than
Speaker 1: me now and I can defeat him. Do you see
Speaker 1: what I'm saying?
Speaker 4: So basically, and you can take them?
Speaker 6: Yes?
Speaker 1: What I literally go could you hang them on a fence,
Speaker 1: cyclone or wrought iron? Okay, so it depends, all right,
Speaker 1: But I literally go home, hug my dad and check
Speaker 1: his shoulders every like every holiday, Sam, I don't.
Speaker 4: Know if this is healthy? Yeah, this guy's dark.
Speaker 1: Say it was healthy? You've asked?
Speaker 2: You know what's really fucking nice?
Speaker 3: The older you get, you realize like your friends are
Speaker 3: your chosen family, and you're like, I'm a fuck with them.
Speaker 3: They understand me. We can talk about it. There's no
Speaker 3: fucking grudges for two years and ship and you know why.
Speaker 4: Sometimes they're not.
Speaker 2: Shit point counter points.
Speaker 4: Sometimes those motherfuckers gotta go to Yes, what did you say?
Speaker 4: Sometimes you gotta check their shoulders had a bar where
Speaker 4: you I'll be like, it's tonight the night.
Speaker 2: You know, while I have you here? Do you do
Speaker 2: you like freestyling?
Speaker 1: No?
Speaker 3: Okay, now, thank you, because I was gonna think you
Speaker 3: want to answer a question and like freestyle, but that's
Speaker 3: not a good thing to do.
Speaker 2: Let me tell you.
Speaker 4: Let me tell you if there's two things I fucking
Speaker 4: hate about rap that uh people think anytime you're involved
Speaker 4: in rap is one freestyling.
Speaker 2: Leave me alone. I don't come to your.
Speaker 4: Job and ask you to fucking type out some ship randomly.
Speaker 1: To two.
Speaker 4: I have this. I just started, uh writing this chapter
Speaker 4: with my book called Don't Fuck Up My Funeral. And
Speaker 4: one of the rules is if anyone, anyone invites a beatbox, sir,
Speaker 4: I will have a sniper positioned and ready.
Speaker 2: Okay, stop it, stop spitting on people.
Speaker 3: No one.
Speaker 2: No one wants that. Okay, okay, no one. I will
Speaker 2: call justin Timberlake and cancel my camera.
Speaker 4: Doesn't need to cancel him. And is he still around?
Speaker 2: No, he's not around. He's not around. He's Jessica problem.
Speaker 4: He is.
Speaker 2: He is less of just taking everybody down, one brown
Speaker 2: titty at a time. So we asked, Oh, that's right,
Speaker 2: it's powerful. Oh you forgot.
Speaker 4: I didn't.
Speaker 3: I did not the most beautiful every oh I've ever
Speaker 3: seen during a halftime show show.
Speaker 2: More So, we had all.
Speaker 4: Been waiting to see that are Ona in a respectful
Speaker 4: way when she was ready to show it. My Woman's King,
Speaker 4: is that the beginning of your of your Janet Jackson?
Speaker 4: Can I ask you, yes, I won't freestyle, but if
Speaker 4: you would end this segment with a short spoken word
Speaker 4: as you just did of Janet Jackson, scht Aiola called
Speaker 4: my woman King.
Speaker 1: Yes, I'd hear it.
Speaker 2: I feel like we would all do a little bit
Speaker 2: of ad libs.
Speaker 4: Sure, are you ready? Yeah? Get ready to snap?
Speaker 2: Short brown Brown took over the town. People were not ready,
Speaker 2: not ready, not ready, not ready. But I said, when
Speaker 2: we when will we did come together?
Speaker 4: Come together, love each other, love each other in respect, respect,
Speaker 4: my beautiful black queen.
Speaker 2: Black queen, black queen, black.
Speaker 1: Queen, very gentle, gentle airhord.
Speaker 2: I'm so sorry, Justin said, I'm just kidding.
Speaker 3: Okay, So we asked all our guests, Yeah, what is
Speaker 3: the most adult thing you want to do for yourself
Speaker 3: this year that you haven't had a chance to do
Speaker 3: and it can be anything, truly anything.
Speaker 4: Stop working for a few months.
Speaker 2: Wow.
Speaker 4: I planned that for last year and as we all know,
Speaker 4: life be life in and I was like, okay, I
Speaker 4: just got to make it through April, got to hand
Speaker 4: everything in and from the end of April until next
Speaker 4: April nothing, I have nothing. I'm just gonna fucking be
Speaker 4: a person. I'm gonna trapes around the globe. I'm gonna
Speaker 4: go to Italy. I'm gonna get some racism, I'm gonna
Speaker 4: get some pasta, I go to friends. I'm just gonna
Speaker 4: go fucking be a person. Yeah, yeah, I'm very excited.
Speaker 2: I'm excited for you. She great everyone.
Speaker 1: Wow, what an experience. That was really cool.
Speaker 2: I know, mainly the poetry. I'm just kidding.
Speaker 3: I will never ask a rapper ever, ever, ever, ever,
Speaker 3: ever put me in my place.
Speaker 2: You would have put me in my place. That was bad.
Speaker 3: I feel bad, but lesson learned. You know, the people
Speaker 3: that love to freestyle are the people that you never
Speaker 3: want to hear freestyle. It's sort of like the people
Speaker 3: that are always naked in the locker room, or like
Speaker 3: never the people that you want to see naked, you
Speaker 3: know what I mean.
Speaker 1: Oh my god. I was about to say, like the
Speaker 1: people on the nude beach.
Speaker 3: Like, yes, full of I don't want to break their confidence,
Speaker 3: but like, do you have to be stretching and blow
Speaker 3: drying your hair while you're naked?
Speaker 1: That's a lot.
Speaker 2: I'll even blow drying my hand naked alone in public.
Speaker 1: You ain't wrong.
Speaker 2: Have you been to a nude beach?
Speaker 1: I've been to one on Matha's Vineyard.
Speaker 4: I was on one.
Speaker 1: Oh my god, yeah, I didn't know it was a
Speaker 1: nude beach. I thought this alien was walking towards us.
Speaker 1: But it was just like an old white dude who's
Speaker 1: had a short torso, his legs were long. It was
Speaker 1: going off.
Speaker 3: My husband has apologized profusely. I don't know why he
Speaker 3: keeps bringing it up. It was not so you did
Speaker 3: not know you were going to a nude beach.
Speaker 1: I didn't know it's on a new beach. I was like,
Speaker 1: somebody called the police, but did you get nude? I've
Speaker 1: never I'm a never nude.
Speaker 2: Why why would you go to Thanksgiving dinner and not
Speaker 2: eat turkey?
Speaker 1: I don't I was just like, well, I wasn't prepared
Speaker 1: in that moment. We had gone to see the lighthouse
Speaker 1: was like, oh the lighthouse, let's go down to the beach.
Speaker 1: So we got under the beach and then it's just
Speaker 1: nothing but dingers and doggers and like I didn't know.
Speaker 1: I was like, same, Zias, that's why I'm here. That's
Speaker 1: they should have prepped you. You know, I had no
Speaker 1: idea none.
Speaker 2: To this episode of adulting.
Speaker 3: Everybody, It's been brought to you by the Diggers and
Speaker 3: Doggers in March this vineyard.
Speaker 1: Thank you for keeping.
Speaker 3: Hope alive question Mark and uh, don't forget to wash
Speaker 3: your hands and.
Speaker 2: Make sure to read the reviews of the beach before
Speaker 2: you go bye. Thank you so much.
Speaker 1: This has been an exactly right production.
Speaker 2: Our senior producer is g Holley.
Speaker 1: Our seeing a producer is Alex Chief.
Speaker 2: This episode was mixed by John Bradley.
Speaker 1: Our guest booker is Patrick Cottner.
Speaker 2: Additional production support from Hannah Kyle Crichton.
Speaker 1: Theme song and live show DJing is by Don will.
Speaker 2: Our live show producer is Marion Ways.
Speaker 1: Artwork by Jamie Bechtel.
Speaker 2: Photography by Gis vander Most.
Speaker 1: Executive produced by Karen kilgera Georgia Hardstar and Daniel Kramer.
Speaker 2: Follow the show on Instagram at adulting the Pod.
Speaker 1: Email your questions to Adulting Questions at gmail dot com.
Speaker 3: Mmmm