Speaker 1: Episode to how to utilize buy nothing groups. Welcome to
Speaker 1: the Frugal Friends podcast, where you'll learn to save money,
Speaker 1: embrace simplicity, rice and liver with your life. Here your
Speaker 1: host Jen and Jill M M M. Welcome to Frugal
Speaker 1: Friends podcast. My name is Jen, my name is Jill,
Speaker 1: and today we are talking about buy nothing groups. If
Speaker 1: you are unfamiliar, will explain it. If you're not on
Speaker 1: Facebook and you wish you had access to buy nothing groups,
Speaker 1: we will say alternatives. Don't worry. Buy nothing groups are
Speaker 1: just a great way to get things for free and
Speaker 1: to pass on things you don't need, and we're excited
Speaker 1: to do a deep dive on them today. It is
Speaker 1: what it sounds like. It's buying nothing, spending money on nothing,
Speaker 1: but still getting things and giving things with our second
Speaker 1: favorite effort, which is free. Yes. But first, this episode
Speaker 1: is brought to you by Debt Free Stories. So we
Speaker 1: are doing a project this fault to inspire our listeners
Speaker 1: paying off debt and celebrate those of you who have
Speaker 1: been listening and succeeding with your debt payoff goals. So,
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Speaker 1: who are on the same journey, celebrate yourself. Please had
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Speaker 1: You know, we love to highlight our listeners stories and voices,
Speaker 1: which is why we've never given up the Bill of
Speaker 1: the Week segment absolutely and you all have sent in
Speaker 1: so many great submissions and this is like imagine Bill
Speaker 1: of the Week elevated, Yes to your debt free, debt
Speaker 1: payoff stories. Cannot wait to hear them because when we
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Speaker 1: the number one thing. So we're going all in. We
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Speaker 1: highlighting people you've already heard from all the time. Uh so, yeah,
Speaker 1: please Frugal Friends podcast, dot com slash stories. So by
Speaker 1: nothing groups love them, some people don't love them. We're
Speaker 1: going to cover that alternatives ways to get through it.
Speaker 1: Um if you are somebody who loves free stuff. We've
Speaker 1: even talked about by nothing groups in a while the
Speaker 1: last episodes we have our way back in the archives,
Speaker 1: like two hundred episodes ago. Yeah, so we've got episode
Speaker 1: thirty one, which is how to Get Everything for Free,
Speaker 1: So that's where we cover by nothing groups. We cover
Speaker 1: time banks, Craigslist, um, and we've got some updates on
Speaker 1: on that kind of in this episode any more. That's
Speaker 1: how old was four years ago. Uh So, no Craigslist
Speaker 1: in this episode. But yeah, so how to get Everything
Speaker 1: for Free? And let us know if you'd like a
Speaker 1: singular episode on time banks, give us an email or
Speaker 1: a shout somewhere. Let us know if you'd like one
Speaker 1: on time banks too, because that's another topic we can
Speaker 1: dive into. It's really interesting. Um. And then episode fifty
Speaker 1: eight building a frugal culture in your community, which is
Speaker 1: what buy nothing groups are essentially here to do. Um.
Speaker 1: So that's episode fifty eight and it is time for
Speaker 1: an update for sure. So here we are. Yes, uh,
Speaker 1: So let's dive into our first article. And this is
Speaker 1: called five reasons why I love by Nothing Groups. This
Speaker 1: is from simple by Emmy and uh and in quotation
Speaker 1: or in parentheses and you will to So, how how
Speaker 1: do you feel about this article, Jill? And how do
Speaker 1: you feel about buy nothing groups? It did get me
Speaker 1: excited and I think a desire to re engage and
Speaker 1: by nothing groups. I really love the concept of them.
Speaker 1: I am a part of my local buy nothing group.
Speaker 1: I have maybe used it a handful of times to
Speaker 1: offload items in my home. I have not yet used
Speaker 1: it to s or anything free for myself yet, So
Speaker 1: I love them. I think I kind of ebb and
Speaker 1: flow in seasons too. How much I have the time
Speaker 1: to kind of give to donating things and posting pictures
Speaker 1: and answering questions and when I don't And then and
Speaker 1: this article mentions this, but how often maybe I want
Speaker 1: to actually sell an item versus giving it away for free?
Speaker 1: And and both are possible. We're not advocating that to
Speaker 1: use it by nothing group means now you forever and
Speaker 1: always have to give things away for free. That's not
Speaker 1: the case, but there are plenty of things and I
Speaker 1: experienced this too that it just it's it doesn't feel
Speaker 1: worth my time for the amount of money I could
Speaker 1: get for the item to sell it, but yet it
Speaker 1: still is valuable and useful, just not useful to me anymore,
Speaker 1: And so I think it's it's a great way to
Speaker 1: serve the community. So all in all, I like them.
Speaker 1: I can't say though that that like is attached to
Speaker 1: me utilizing it constantly. Yeah, it's definitely seasonal, and we'll
Speaker 1: talk about all of that through these next two articles.
Speaker 1: But yeah, we're gonna go through all five on this
Speaker 1: one because we really like all five. So for starters,
Speaker 1: the article does talk about just what by nothing groups are,
Speaker 1: and the name does it. It's pretty self explanatory. It
Speaker 1: is a group online, usually local to your area, where
Speaker 1: you can post things for free and get things for free.
Speaker 1: You're buying nothing, but you are getting something out of
Speaker 1: being a part of the group. And so some of
Speaker 1: the things that they're highlighting in this article, and we'll
Speaker 1: go through them just to hype you up on this concept.
Speaker 1: Number one is that by nothing groups are hyper local,
Speaker 1: and this is my experience as well, meaning that you're
Speaker 1: connecting with your actual neighbors. Most buy nothing groups, especially
Speaker 1: if you are in more populated area a city like
Speaker 1: we are in St. Pete, are by nothing groups are
Speaker 1: just a couple of miles that covered. I don't even
Speaker 1: think we're in the same by nothing we're not. And
Speaker 1: and in our area you're not allowed. And that's a
Speaker 1: pretty standard rule that you can be in multiple by
Speaker 1: nothing groups so that you're not getting like super grabby
Speaker 1: with all the stuff that's being posted. And one of
Speaker 1: the things that they say about this hyper local concept,
Speaker 1: like you're you're meeting you're very real neighbors that are
Speaker 1: just a few blocks away, is that the likelihood of
Speaker 1: people kind of flaking out on you or just sending
Speaker 1: a standard is this still available and then ghosting you
Speaker 1: isn't happening as much. There seems to be a little
Speaker 1: bit more higher level of engagement and respect for one another.
Speaker 1: Of course, when you take money out of the equation
Speaker 1: that can also sometimes it helps, sometimes it doesn't. But
Speaker 1: they're just saying that the follow through seems to be
Speaker 1: a little bit heightened within a buy nothing group, and
Speaker 1: it could be because it's hyperlocalized. Yeah, so my first
Speaker 1: complaint about buy nothing groups four and this is for
Speaker 1: bigger cities because we have so many buy nothing groups
Speaker 1: in St. Pete. It's that it can alienate some people.
Speaker 1: So like the more expensive parts of town, you can't
Speaker 1: benefit from the nicer quality stuff that they are giving
Speaker 1: because you can't get into their buy nothing group. And
Speaker 1: so if you are in a lower income area, the
Speaker 1: quality does fluctuate. I've been into buy nothing groups not
Speaker 1: at the same time, and I've noticed a big difference
Speaker 1: the what I was in first before we moved. It
Speaker 1: was definitely higher income, definitely had better quality stuff. And
Speaker 1: if you are in a more spread out area you
Speaker 1: may not experience this. But because we are so densely populated,
Speaker 1: we're the most densely populated county in the state of Florida,
Speaker 1: we experience this here. And so so you can only
Speaker 1: be in one group at a time, and they do
Speaker 1: ask you where you live, like not your address, but
Speaker 1: like if you're in the zones. But they're not going
Speaker 1: to check your tax records to see if you're lying
Speaker 1: or not. They're just going to check to see if
Speaker 1: you're in another group. If you are, you've got to
Speaker 1: like either leave or be kicked out before you can
Speaker 1: join the other group. That's the vetting that they do,
Speaker 1: so you will have to undergo some vetting. So if
Speaker 1: you want to be in the and this sounds bad,
Speaker 1: but if you want to be in the buy nothing
Speaker 1: group on the rich side of town, you can't be
Speaker 1: in the one by you. The caveat that would come
Speaker 1: with that would be you can't do like a porch
Speaker 1: pick up. If you're going to give something away, you'll
Speaker 1: have to bring it to that neighborhood because as of
Speaker 1: the hyperlocal nous of it um and same thing, if
Speaker 1: you want to pick something up, you're going to have
Speaker 1: to drive to that part of town for that. So
Speaker 1: something to be aware of. If you're in a densely
Speaker 1: populated county and there's a ton of fine stuff in
Speaker 1: our area, I would say try it in its purest
Speaker 1: form first. And if you don't see success, but you
Speaker 1: see there's another group having a lot of success that's
Speaker 1: really busy, you don't have to relegate yourself to just yours.
Speaker 1: What I am preferring now, especially since I've left Facebook,
Speaker 1: for the most part, is the next door app. So
Speaker 1: it's like, so the buy Nothing group has released an app,
Speaker 1: and we'll talk about that later. But I I like
Speaker 1: the next door app because it's not it doesn't have
Speaker 1: the segregation almost that the buy nothing groups on Facebook
Speaker 1: havep you can you get that wider area of of things.
Speaker 1: So yeah, that's just something to be aware of. Hyperlocal
Speaker 1: is great you get to meet your close neighbors, but
Speaker 1: it can also have drawbacks. Yeah, I would just add
Speaker 1: the caveat that the purpose of a buy nothing group
Speaker 1: is reciprocity, and I know we'll get there, but just
Speaker 1: to that point of potentially exploring a buy nothing group
Speaker 1: that isn't actually in your area. Two, as you said, Jen,
Speaker 1: first begin in your area and actually see if it's
Speaker 1: active and working for you, and if not, still follow
Speaker 1: the rules of only being a part of one by
Speaker 1: nothing group. But my strong encouragement would still be to
Speaker 1: be an active member who's also giving and not just receiving.
Speaker 1: Like I could see that being a draw to say,
Speaker 1: we'll let me go here so I can get like
Speaker 1: all of these better things just for myself. But the
Speaker 1: buy nothing group in the community that it creates is
Speaker 1: definitely one of reciprocity, giving and receiving. So I just
Speaker 1: want to highlight that aspect, please keep that in mind. Yeah,
Speaker 1: well that leads into this second point is that buy
Speaker 1: nothing focuses on abundance, collaboration, and creativity rather than scarcity culture.
Speaker 1: And this is the ethos of the buy nothing group.
Speaker 1: It's not necessarily carried out by its members, but all
Speaker 1: of the admin for buy nothing groups are fantastic. They
Speaker 1: are very as long as you get they're very like
Speaker 1: adamant about the ethos. If you get admin that are
Speaker 1: really adamant about the ethos, then it's a really great, positive,
Speaker 1: encouraging group and you can even ask questions. That's part
Speaker 1: of the collaboration and the creativity, and it's people giving
Speaker 1: out of abundance. You will sometimes see people asking for
Speaker 1: money out of need. It's typically rare though, if you've
Speaker 1: got a well maintained group, and those are usually monitored
Speaker 1: by the admin anyway. So it's just it's a really
Speaker 1: good place where people are giving out of abundance, taking
Speaker 1: because they need not to resell, and just getting to
Speaker 1: know your neighbors um and even the language that they
Speaker 1: require that you use, it's like you have it's not
Speaker 1: like a buy sell kind of like language they require
Speaker 1: that you use plain language like you're talking to people,
Speaker 1: so there's no like I s oh, you know whatever,
Speaker 1: where you're just looking for stuff. You have to recognize
Speaker 1: that that we're all people and we're all in this collaboratively.
Speaker 1: So like, yeah, this really does work based on the
Speaker 1: admin of the group. But if you've got good admin,
Speaker 1: then it really does just really like set a really
Speaker 1: good ethos for the group. Yeah, speaking of ethos, another
Speaker 1: reason that this article advocates for buy nothing groups and
Speaker 1: a re isn't I really like it too. I've noticed
Speaker 1: this in mind by Nothing group number three is that
Speaker 1: group members are encouraged to slow down and let post
Speaker 1: simmer for at least twelve hours, which really does make
Speaker 1: the giving and receiving process less frantic. That reduces this
Speaker 1: high sense of urgency and and just makes it more
Speaker 1: in a more enjoyable process. And I love this especially
Speaker 1: for some of your more high ticket items. And that's
Speaker 1: usually where I'll see it is somebody posts Let's say
Speaker 1: somebody posts a vitam X mixer. I don't know why
Speaker 1: they would ever do that, But let's say someone posts
Speaker 1: a itemics blender. A lot of people are gonna want that.
Speaker 1: Who wouldn't you know, and so rather than making it
Speaker 1: a first come, first serve like we might be accustomed
Speaker 1: to in a Facebook, market place or or yard sale
Speaker 1: kind of situation, this is really a matter of giving
Speaker 1: everybody an opportunity to be able to you have access
Speaker 1: to this thing by letting it simmer. And it's not
Speaker 1: just given to, you know, the person who yells the
Speaker 1: loudest or his quickest on the draw letting something simmer,
Speaker 1: and sometimes it's it's up to really the giver to
Speaker 1: decide who it's going to go to. Sometimes they'll do
Speaker 1: a random like spin the wheel of names. Sometimes they'll
Speaker 1: just get to choose who they wanted to go to.
Speaker 1: But what I think this also reduces is the same
Speaker 1: person constantly getting the things just because that's all they're
Speaker 1: doing is sitting at home and seeing all these posts
Speaker 1: and having access to it. And also a really good
Speaker 1: admin is going to make sure that that's not happening either,
Speaker 1: that you've got your one person who's always asking for stuff,
Speaker 1: always the first to take stuff. That there really is
Speaker 1: this culture of reciprocity that is really encouraged in the group.
Speaker 1: And it's a reason I love it too, because sometimes
Speaker 1: especially on Facebook, marketplace. I can see something that Yeah,
Speaker 1: I would really love to purchase that thing, but there's
Speaker 1: already fifty comments, so forget about it. But with something
Speaker 1: like a buy nothing group, there could be fifty comments.
Speaker 1: But if it's not given away yet, you could still
Speaker 1: have a chance to be able to get that thing.
Speaker 1: Not everything is like a hot ticket item like that.
Speaker 1: But I really love that simmer approach. Yeah, and and
Speaker 1: those posts will be marked like this is a simmer post.
Speaker 1: I like it when they say a time when they're
Speaker 1: going to come back and check that way, you know,
Speaker 1: like if it's done simmering or not. Um. But I
Speaker 1: love the ones that are like I'm gonna let this
Speaker 1: one simmer. Post your funniest meme and I'll pick my favorite,
Speaker 1: or post your best dad joke or GIF something like that. Um.
Speaker 1: But I also just like I'm gonna put the copy
Speaker 1: and paste the names into a wheel and pick the
Speaker 1: one that comes up. But I really, I really like
Speaker 1: the ones that are funny memes and gifts because then
Speaker 1: everyone just gets to like scroll, everyone benefits. Even if
Speaker 1: you don't get it, you still get to scroll through
Speaker 1: a bunch of funny memes and gifts. Uh. So Yeah,
Speaker 1: I love the simmer post and it means you don't
Speaker 1: have to be babysitting Facebook, which is another complaint. A
Speaker 1: chief complaint that people have about by nothing groups is
Speaker 1: that you have to babysit it to get the good stuff.
Speaker 1: But when you've got good admins, when you've got good
Speaker 1: participants in the group, and you get these simmer posts,
Speaker 1: then you feel better. Like if you're checking it once
Speaker 1: a day and you've missed something, you feel okay about
Speaker 1: it because the next day you're going to hit on
Speaker 1: a simmer post that you're going to get, so it's um,
Speaker 1: it's really good. Fourth is too is buy nothing groups
Speaker 1: allow you to live more sustainably by thinking second hand first.
Speaker 1: And you know that is something that we personally love
Speaker 1: is thinking second hand first. It not only saves you
Speaker 1: a ton of money, but it helps the environment because
Speaker 1: when you are throwing away stuff, you pay for your
Speaker 1: city's dump Like in your utilities, you pay for that.
Speaker 1: And so the more space your city has to use
Speaker 1: to throw junk away, the more property they have to
Speaker 1: buy elsewhere, the more you pay for that. So thinking
Speaker 1: secondhand first isn't just an environmental choice, it's actually a
Speaker 1: double sided money saving choice. And this is really another
Speaker 1: part of the ethos of buy nothing groups is that
Speaker 1: you are instead of also just giving something to goodwill,
Speaker 1: that good will, if they don't sell, will also just
Speaker 1: throw away. You know, you're giving it to somebody who
Speaker 1: actually wants it. And so this is it takes out
Speaker 1: the middleman of thrift stores. Um, it is not that
Speaker 1: much extra work for the giver, and it saves a
Speaker 1: lot of people money. I love the example that they
Speaker 1: given here too, and I've seen this as well, that
Speaker 1: there can be some borrowing that happens and buy nothing
Speaker 1: groups it's not always just about giving and never seeing
Speaker 1: that item again. Sometimes there's opportunities or someone just wants
Speaker 1: something for quick use but doesn't need it long term,
Speaker 1: and what a more sustainable way to approach things. The
Speaker 1: writer gives the example of wanting a chocolate fountain for
Speaker 1: a brunch meeting that they were doing, and before buying
Speaker 1: it on Amazon for bucks, they checked with the buy
Speaker 1: nothing group and someone was willing to just let them
Speaker 1: borrow their's which was awesome because they didn't need a
Speaker 1: chocolate fountain long term, they needed to use it for
Speaker 1: the brunch meeting. So I also love that that possibility
Speaker 1: within the buy Nothing group. Yeah, I see that all
Speaker 1: the time. And this is a place where that hyperlocal,
Speaker 1: which is why you should try the hyperlocal pure local
Speaker 1: group first, is that you can create these relationships with
Speaker 1: people where you know you can borrow their stuff, they
Speaker 1: can borrow your stuff, and you're just creating these relationships
Speaker 1: that are really important to using resources that are not
Speaker 1: money to get things that you would normally spend money on.
Speaker 1: So the money is not ultimately the thing we ever want.
Speaker 1: It's the thing the money gets us. And if we
Speaker 1: can get those things without the middleman, so to speak,
Speaker 1: without the money, then why wouldn't we? And the way
Speaker 1: we normally get those things without money is through relationships,
Speaker 1: and that's what we're building. That's the capital, uh, that
Speaker 1: we're building through these hyperlocal relationships, and that's just that's
Speaker 1: a mindset shift to to live that way. Um and
Speaker 1: the buy Nothing group is kind of this facilitated way
Speaker 1: when you've made this mindset shift and you're like, Okay,
Speaker 1: where do I go? Now? Do I just like walk
Speaker 1: up to my next door neighbors and offer them a
Speaker 1: cup of sugar? Like I don't know? The buy Nothing
Speaker 1: group gives you away to work out this mindset and
Speaker 1: build those relationships with other people who have also made
Speaker 1: the mindset shift. Yeah, because it might take a little
Speaker 1: more time to do this than it would just to
Speaker 1: one click buy something on Amazon. But when we've made
Speaker 1: that mindset shift that it's valuable to connect with our community,
Speaker 1: it's valuable to go second hand first and to reuse
Speaker 1: what's already out in the world, than than the additional
Speaker 1: time that it takes suddenly become so much more worth it.
Speaker 1: The last one on this list is that number five.
Speaker 1: Generosity is a cornerstone of buy nothing groups, and we
Speaker 1: love this. We love the tenants of generosity, the way
Speaker 1: that it can be woven into a frugal lifestyle, of
Speaker 1: values based lifestyle. And what we can also see happen
Speaker 1: is when we give and we see the impact of
Speaker 1: that giving, it can spur us on to want to
Speaker 1: give more. And there's the benefit, as we've already said,
Speaker 1: of giving and receiving. Others are also being generous within
Speaker 1: the buy nothing group, but I could see this having
Speaker 1: an additional benefit of maintaining less clutter, maintaining some more
Speaker 1: of your minimalist or simple living lifestyle when you've begun
Speaker 1: to approach your home as I'm not going to keep
Speaker 1: everything just because it's already here, or I'm sentimentally attached
Speaker 1: to it, but I'm not using it. If this could
Speaker 1: serve someone else better, there's kind of that that other
Speaker 1: thing that we can click into of generosity to say,
Speaker 1: I have this, it's just sitting around, I never use it,
Speaker 1: and rather than throw it away, throwing it away it
Speaker 1: could benefit somebody else. And then now I've got even
Speaker 1: less clutter in my home that's not being used. So
Speaker 1: there's just a lot of really beautiful things that can happen. Yeah,
Speaker 1: I love that thought for those things that are a
Speaker 1: little harder to give up to imagine them going into
Speaker 1: somebody's home versus just the you know, a box at
Speaker 1: Goodwill or the or the dump. It can't help you
Speaker 1: get over that hump to get rid of an item
Speaker 1: you've needed to get rid of but have been holding
Speaker 1: onto because you just don't want to see it go
Speaker 1: to the wrong place. That's a really good one and
Speaker 1: I love their gratitude posts. Again, this comes down to
Speaker 1: the ethos of the group and the admin and the participants.
Speaker 1: But um, you're encouraged to post gratitude posts with the
Speaker 1: things that you've received, and it's just like a really
Speaker 1: positive good space. I love that not every group has
Speaker 1: done that. My old group did that more so than
Speaker 1: this one, but it is um it is really sweet
Speaker 1: to see. Like I got all of my baby stuff
Speaker 1: for Kai from the buy Nothing group and I remember
Speaker 1: just like posting the bags of clothes because I I
Speaker 1: just posted, oh my gosh, if you're having a baby,
Speaker 1: this is probably the biggest. When we did our like
Speaker 1: frugal parenting episode, I was like buy Nothing group, man,
Speaker 1: that's that's where it's at. And so I just I said,
Speaker 1: I'm having a baby boy, and I have nothing. Please
Speaker 1: anything anyone is trying to, you know, pass on. Please. Also,
Speaker 1: I know nothing, so tell me what I need, right.
Speaker 1: So I just got all these like bags of clothing.
Speaker 1: I got a crib. I didn't even go there for
Speaker 1: a crib, but I went there for clothing. And she's like, actually,
Speaker 1: we have this crib that we're not using. Do you
Speaker 1: need a crib? And I'm like, yes, I need a crib.
Speaker 1: I I met I had nothing when I said so,
Speaker 1: so we got so much stuff and I and I
Speaker 1: posted a gratitude postum to the lady I got the
Speaker 1: crib from. And it's just really great. It's a really
Speaker 1: great place. And if all of this is just making
Speaker 1: you super antsy to get on or by nothing group,
Speaker 1: but you don't have one in your area, we're gonna
Speaker 1: talk about how you well, first of all, how you
Speaker 1: can find one, and if you don't have one, how
Speaker 1: you can start one if you've got the gumption for it,
Speaker 1: and if you have one, how you can participate well
Speaker 1: in it too. Um And this is from share able
Speaker 1: dot net and this is this is an updated um thing.
Speaker 1: We're going to go through all six of these steps,
Speaker 1: whether so this is whether you don't have one or
Speaker 1: you do. We're gonna give you some useful tips for
Speaker 1: using it. And if you're not on Facebook, we'll we've
Speaker 1: in some tips for next door and then buy nothing app.
Speaker 1: So the first step, if you don't have one, actually
Speaker 1: make sure that one doesn't exist. So the easiest thing
Speaker 1: to do is to search Facebook for buy nothing groups
Speaker 1: and if you see one, just try to join it.
Speaker 1: They'll ask you for confirmation of where you live. And
Speaker 1: if there's another one that's a better you know, that's
Speaker 1: more hyperlocal. The admin knows. The admin will tell you actually,
Speaker 1: this is your group. So if you don't see one
Speaker 1: specifically for you, just join the closest one. You'll go
Speaker 1: through the filtering process. It'll be fine. But if there
Speaker 1: is actually not one for you, then you can go
Speaker 1: to buy Nothing Project dot org. You also, so there's
Speaker 1: a list that Buy Nothing Project dot org too, but
Speaker 1: I would trust the Facebook more first. Um, and you
Speaker 1: can contact the administration through the website and follow the
Speaker 1: protocol because buy Nothing Project is trademarked. Like we said,
Speaker 1: there's an ethos, there's steps, there are guidelines and stuff,
Speaker 1: so there are things to follow. It's absolutely not a
Speaker 1: free for all, and that's one of the things that
Speaker 1: makes being part of a buy nothing group and in
Speaker 1: joyable experience. It can also be an annoyance for some people,
Speaker 1: but ultimately the guidelines, they're very strict guidelines. Ultimately that's
Speaker 1: a good thing for these groups because there's so many people,
Speaker 1: so many ideas, so many walks of life. The only
Speaker 1: thing they share in common is an is an address
Speaker 1: location area. So yeah, definitely search ask admin and then
Speaker 1: if you really want to start one Buy Nothing Project
Speaker 1: dot org. So then the second step just regarding so
Speaker 1: if you do end up setting one up, is talking
Speaker 1: about setting clear boundaries. Some of this is related to
Speaker 1: the borders of where the buy nothing group is kind
Speaker 1: of what what roads, what miles, kind of demarket where
Speaker 1: that buy nothing group is located. And of course, if
Speaker 1: there's not much in your area, then it might be
Speaker 1: a wider range, a larger geographic area where the buy
Speaker 1: nothing group exists. If it's more city, you might need
Speaker 1: to really hone it in a lot more. And sometimes
Speaker 1: you might start with a wide radius and then break
Speaker 1: off over time if the group starts becoming too large
Speaker 1: and if it's covering too much surface area within within
Speaker 1: your location. But then this also gets into some of
Speaker 1: the other sets of rules that you just talked about
Speaker 1: jen regarding what buy nothing groups say is and isn't allowed,
Speaker 1: the boundaries and the policies that they've set up, and
Speaker 1: recognizing that it's going to make it a better experience
Speaker 1: for everybody if we are recognizing and adhering to the
Speaker 1: rules of not being a part of more than one
Speaker 1: at a time, of identifying the best location of these
Speaker 1: ideas of reciprocity and generosity, and not asking to sell
Speaker 1: things on the platform or being too greedy the things
Speaker 1: that are being given. So there's it's really important for
Speaker 1: if you're a joining one to make sure that some
Speaker 1: of these things are in place, that the admin is
Speaker 1: running it in a really um ethical, beneficial way for everybody,
Speaker 1: and if you are starting one, that you're setting these
Speaker 1: clear boundaries and policies from the start to have a
Speaker 1: really good experience for everybody. Yeah, and you can always
Speaker 1: ask the Buy Nothing Project like administrators the other email
Speaker 1: or other local admin that maybe a little further away
Speaker 1: from you, maybe there's a group that's getting bigger. So
Speaker 1: usually it about thousand people, groups will split off. They'll
Speaker 1: split Like the reader or the writer said, when the
Speaker 1: group started, hers was a wide swath of Philadelphia, and
Speaker 1: as by Nothing Project has gained notoriety, more people have joined.
Speaker 1: Now her group is less than one square mile. So
Speaker 1: that happens to groups are always breaking off, so they
Speaker 1: are more manageable. They try not to have more than
Speaker 1: a thousand people in a group at a time, and
Speaker 1: so once they get to that, then they'll start to
Speaker 1: break off. So maybe your group is approaching that and
Speaker 1: you want to say, hey, I'm willing to you know,
Speaker 1: start another one because we're quite far away from you whatever.
Speaker 1: So that's also something you can be open to doing.
Speaker 1: And you can ask the admin of that group, like,
Speaker 1: what's been your experience, what do you think by boundaries
Speaker 1: should be? So ask for help for sure. Third is
Speaker 1: to give freely from your own abundance and only take
Speaker 1: what you can use. Uh. So this is not a
Speaker 1: place where people are keeping score. Giving is not based
Speaker 1: on financial need. It's not a scarcity mindset. It is
Speaker 1: a sharing mindset. Sometimes giving is based on the best meme,
Speaker 1: you know, Like, that's what I love about this. The
Speaker 1: best SOB story does not win, like the This is
Speaker 1: not where we're trying to prove that we are the
Speaker 1: poorest person so we get the best stuff. This is
Speaker 1: a place where we give out of abundance and generosity.
Speaker 1: I love that. That's a helpful reminder for me. I
Speaker 1: And as I'm hearing you describe this step, it's highlighting
Speaker 1: for me that I think this might be one of
Speaker 1: the barriers for why I don't use it very often
Speaker 1: is I think I constantly have this thought surface and
Speaker 1: me of I don't want to take something from somebody
Speaker 1: who might need it more than I do, which I
Speaker 1: don't want to totally get rid of that idea, but
Speaker 1: it is a little bit of a mindset shift to say,
Speaker 1: but everyone is sharing and sometimes yeah, anybody who's a
Speaker 1: part of the group could have access to receive that thing.
Speaker 1: It doesn't just have to be the person with the
Speaker 1: biggest need to be able to receive, especially if you're giving.
Speaker 1: If this is sometimes you post things for free and
Speaker 1: sometimes you're able to get things for free, it's it
Speaker 1: still feels like a little uncomfortable for me, But I
Speaker 1: do appreciate needing to look at that reality that when
Speaker 1: you're a part of this sort of sharing, generous community,
Speaker 1: it doesn't have to always be based on who has
Speaker 1: the most acute need. We can just give to one another. Well,
Speaker 1: that is the biggest thing from the last articles that
Speaker 1: we don't give out of scarcity, We give out of relationship,
Speaker 1: the desire for relationship and the desire to connect with people,
Speaker 1: because this is what we have lost in the age
Speaker 1: of social media, is the face to face connection with
Speaker 1: our neighbors, and that is ultimately what the buy nothing
Speaker 1: group wants to build. That's why there's a high emphasis
Speaker 1: on hyperlocal, a high emphasis on giving out of abundance,
Speaker 1: because we're giving out of relationship, so giving freely from
Speaker 1: your own abundance. And if you're starting one, it will
Speaker 1: start slow. Uh so don't be afraid of that. I
Speaker 1: know there's all kinds of tricks you can use to
Speaker 1: like build up a buy nothing group, and that's definitely
Speaker 1: over on the Buy Nothing project dot org website. But
Speaker 1: it does start slow, and if you're starting when, you'll
Speaker 1: have to start with giving of your own stuff stuff first.
Speaker 1: But yeah, and and just so, the way we make
Speaker 1: sure that we don't like take too much and play
Speaker 1: into that like need needy scarcity is that you only
Speaker 1: take what you can use as well, but if you
Speaker 1: can use it, don't be afraid to ask for it. Yeah.
Speaker 1: I like that too, that you can ask for things
Speaker 1: in the buy nothing groups. I didn't really realize that
Speaker 1: until I was in Mind for a couple of months
Speaker 1: and started seeing both say does anyone happen to have
Speaker 1: fill in the blank. I'm like, oh, that's another cool
Speaker 1: way of approaching the group, rather than just waiting for
Speaker 1: the potential thing. It's possible someone has the thing, you
Speaker 1: just need to ask for it. Yeah, And something like admins.
Speaker 1: I have seen delete or people that are just like
Speaker 1: I s, oh my gosh, what is it. Somebody asked
Speaker 1: for a laptop like I s l a working laptop,
Speaker 1: which sure, that's fine the brevity of it and not
Speaker 1: like just viewing people as things with stuff to give.
Speaker 1: That's the problem versus the actual like you need to
Speaker 1: probably buy that on Facebook marketplace, Like you're asking a
Speaker 1: little too much. That that was my problem with it.
Speaker 1: That's not a buy nothing problem. You totally have the
Speaker 1: freedom to ask for a working laptop, but if you're
Speaker 1: going to do it, you need to have a really
Speaker 1: good story. You need to do you need to need
Speaker 1: to be you need to sell me on what I
Speaker 1: should give you my free working laptop. But sometimes people
Speaker 1: have one and some and that's what I'm saying. Like
Speaker 1: I instantly judged, but then I was like, you know what,
Speaker 1: that is in their right. Somebody may have that, but
Speaker 1: you didn't sell me well enough on why you deserve
Speaker 1: my laptop. They're not and they might not be asking
Speaker 1: to take your laptop jen they're not like that. I
Speaker 1: would have been much much better, Like if you're like
Speaker 1: I have a I have a meeting like that for
Speaker 1: these people that are really important, and I'm looking for
Speaker 1: a chocolate fountain to make it special. Anyone got one
Speaker 1: I can borrow or anyone who got this thing that
Speaker 1: I can have. Sometimes you do need the story, you
Speaker 1: need the you need. It's not a SOB story. You
Speaker 1: don't need a SOB story. There's a difference. I'll make
Speaker 1: them cry talking to people like they are humans versus
Speaker 1: only things that can offer you something. That's the differentiation. Okay,
Speaker 1: So another thing step forward. Won't use the buy nothing
Speaker 1: platform to buy or sell things standard because it's in
Speaker 1: the name buy nothing. So yeah, there's plenty of other
Speaker 1: groups for that. And and also make sure that you're
Speaker 1: reading kind of well the post whatever someone's posting, some
Speaker 1: of the pin documents, basic rules of group decorum. Make
Speaker 1: sure that you're aware of how the group is asking
Speaker 1: that you engage. But definitely one of the biggest no
Speaker 1: nos is trying to buy or sell things, which is
Speaker 1: it can seem like one is worse than another, like
Speaker 1: trying to sell something is worse than trying to buy something,
Speaker 1: but both are equally frowned upon that. Do not try
Speaker 1: to offer money for something, because that too elevates you
Speaker 1: above somebody else to receive something because you're offering money.
Speaker 1: So it's kind of like two ends of the spectrum,
Speaker 1: Like it's not about the most needy person, and it's
Speaker 1: also not about the most wealthy person. All are equal
Speaker 1: and the buy nothing group and we give out of
Speaker 1: generosity and relationship and abundance and creativity. Yeah, and if
Speaker 1: somebody sees something from the buy nothing group on Facebook Marketplace,
Speaker 1: you will get banned from buying nothing groups in general
Speaker 1: in your area. Oh, like you went and took something
Speaker 1: for free and then then tried to set That has happened,
Speaker 1: I have seen it. You will get banned, not just
Speaker 1: kicked out of your group, you will get banned from
Speaker 1: all the support. Yes, please do. Somebody will find you
Speaker 1: out because the same people browsing there buy nothing group
Speaker 1: are browsing Facebook Marketplace. You know that you Yeah, you
Speaker 1: will be found. Can run, you can hide, but you
Speaker 1: will be caught. Yeah. So step five is to share
Speaker 1: your skills. That's another. You don't have to just give things,
Speaker 1: you can give skills. This is actually a big thing
Speaker 1: in time Bank. So if you're looking to share skills
Speaker 1: and receive service in the form of skills, definitely see
Speaker 1: if your city has a time bank, because that's really
Speaker 1: all time banks do instead of things, its services. And
Speaker 1: lastly number six. We've talked about this already, but show
Speaker 1: appreciation and I love this. It also makes it enjoyable
Speaker 1: for others who are scrolling the group, but certainly for
Speaker 1: the person who gave the item to go back and
Speaker 1: leave a thank you. Even pictures, but just a simple
Speaker 1: thank you can go a really long way and continues
Speaker 1: to motivate the group. Provides a little bit of that
Speaker 1: follow up of you having received the thing putting it
Speaker 1: to use. This is just good practice. I think in
Speaker 1: general that we've gotten away from a following up with
Speaker 1: a thank you. Whether you're going to buy nothing group
Speaker 1: or you're just a person trying to be a good
Speaker 1: friend or a good employer or partner, following up with
Speaker 1: a thank you, it's just good life advice. Man. You
Speaker 1: know what else is good life advice? And I'm really
Speaker 1: grateful for it. I usually do follow up with a
Speaker 1: thank you. I never forget it. The bill of the week,
Speaker 1: that's right, it's time for the best minute of your
Speaker 1: entire week. Maybe a baby was born and his name
Speaker 1: is William. Maybe you paid off your mortgage, maybe your
Speaker 1: car died, and you're happy to not have to pay
Speaker 1: that bill anymore. To bills Buffalo bills, Bill Clint, this
Speaker 1: is the bill of the week. Hi, Jen and Jill,
Speaker 1: this is Michelle from Chicago. My bill of the week
Speaker 1: is actually two bills, one for each of my children,
Speaker 1: medical bills that collectively totaled almost d dollars. And these
Speaker 1: bills were unexpected it and they were burning a hole
Speaker 1: in my heart. So I just took the plunge and
Speaker 1: I paid both of them in the same day, paid
Speaker 1: them off completely. It tightened us up a little bit
Speaker 1: for the month, but I am so glad that I
Speaker 1: did it and that I was able to do it,
Speaker 1: and now we can move on from these two medical situations.
Speaker 1: My children are beautiful and healthy, and I'm just so
Speaker 1: grateful that we're able to put this behind us. Thank
Speaker 1: you so much for the podcast. I totally love it.
Speaker 1: It's become one of my all time favorites in a
Speaker 1: very short amount of time. So keep up the great
Speaker 1: work and I can't wait to keep listening. Thank you,
Speaker 1: Thank you, Michelle. That is amazing. And as someone with
Speaker 1: the day uh and one on the way, I totally
Speaker 1: know the feeling of that. Just having that weight off
Speaker 1: of your child. It's so good. Yeah, connecting these medical
Speaker 1: bills with them every time you see them, you're minded.
Speaker 1: Just any bill that is hanging over us. Just being
Speaker 1: able to get it gone out of the mind move
Speaker 1: on with your life feels like a major relief of
Speaker 1: from the to do list, but also the financial weight
Speaker 1: lingering over you. So first of all, so glad you
Speaker 1: had the money to pay it off. It sounds like
Speaker 1: it made the month a bit tight, but all worth
Speaker 1: it for the freedom that you experience with those bills gone.
Speaker 1: Happy to hear your children are healthy, Michelle, this is awesome.
Speaker 1: Thanks for phoning in from Chicago. If you all listening
Speaker 1: to us, have a bill that you want to submit,
Speaker 1: whether it has to do with your beautiful, healthy children
Speaker 1: that you pay off their medical bills for, or just
Speaker 1: literally and anything else you literally ran into a duck
Speaker 1: bill and a lot of offenses. There's probably a lot
Speaker 1: of options there. Yeah, visit Frugal Friends podcast dot com,
Speaker 1: slash bill, leave us your bill. We're ready for it,
Speaker 1: just sitting over here waiting. We got nothing else to do.
Speaker 1: Now it's time for road alright, So today's lightning around
Speaker 1: question from our podcast manager Goldie. What's the And I
Speaker 1: like how she denotes this, what's the best material thing
Speaker 1: that you've gotten for free? Because we all know the
Speaker 1: best things in life are free, But what's the bestial
Speaker 1: thing from my husband? Try again, that's not free. Also,
Speaker 1: it's not some sort of exchange there. Um okay, so
Speaker 1: this it doesn't have to be through it by nothing
Speaker 1: group right? No? Absolutely, Okay. I've got some really great
Speaker 1: ones I have gotten. We have gotten my husband and
Speaker 1: I who freely gives me his love a car, a vehicle,
Speaker 1: and a hot tub. Nice hot tub. There's other things,
Speaker 1: but those are like probably some of the biggest ones
Speaker 1: that I can think of. It is a good hot
Speaker 1: time like that. Now, I will say, yes, they were free.
Speaker 1: Both of those things were a bit of exchanges, kind
Speaker 1: of a trading of goods and services, but no money
Speaker 1: was exchanged. Yeah, and I love that. Okay, that's great.
Speaker 1: That's that still counts. You're getting what you want without
Speaker 1: exchanging money um or bodies. Yea for the car, we
Speaker 1: install the backsplash for good friends. Kevin and Chelsea. Shout
Speaker 1: out to you guys, you're the best holding it down,
Speaker 1: we installed the backsplash, They gave us their car and
Speaker 1: with the hot tub. H it was our neighbors. He
Speaker 1: was getting a new one's who was looking to get
Speaker 1: rid of the old one, and he also needed a
Speaker 1: place to park his trailer his smoker that was on
Speaker 1: a trailer, So we let him park his smoker on
Speaker 1: a trailer in our backyard for about six months and
Speaker 1: we got his hot tub. Fair trade. Yeah, I mean
Speaker 1: I still think we got the better end of that deal,
Speaker 1: but that is a trade. I would do the trade. Yeah, absolutely,
Speaker 1: that's a trade I would do if anybody wants to
Speaker 1: give me their hot hot tub. I have a lot
Speaker 1: of land in Gulfport to park things on which cannot
Speaker 1: be said around here. Here's the thing. There are a
Speaker 1: lot of people who are trying to get rid of
Speaker 1: their hot tubs, but a lot of times it's because
Speaker 1: they need work. Don't be fooled. Because we were burning
Speaker 1: on this. Eric and I in our very younger, younger years,
Speaker 1: were so excited about this hot tub, and essentially what
Speaker 1: we ended up being was free junk removal for these people.
Speaker 1: There was no way that the hot tub was ever
Speaker 1: going to work again. But I don't. I don't know.
Speaker 1: We were young and naive and two nice that we
Speaker 1: still ended up taking it from them. And then the
Speaker 1: next few weekends were spent saws alling it into tiny
Speaker 1: little pieces so that bit by bit we could throw
Speaker 1: it away. And that was silly. We were just yeah,
Speaker 1: we just did a service for for someone. They were elderly.
Speaker 1: We felt bad and so we were free drunk removal
Speaker 1: for the day. Don't do that. Don't recognize a lot
Speaker 1: of people trying to get rid of their hot dubs.
Speaker 1: It's not because they're in perfectly working conditions. Yours isn't working, yes,
Speaker 1: and it's fantastic. What about you? Okay? Um, So I
Speaker 1: would say the crib definitely, all the baby stuff that
Speaker 1: we got mostly free. I didn't have like a nesting
Speaker 1: instinct where I had to decorate a nursery. I had
Speaker 1: as like, how do I get this baby into this
Speaker 1: house like sort of my body and into the house.
Speaker 1: What is the minimum I have to do to get there?
Speaker 1: How do I do the least? And I think, unfortunately
Speaker 1: that comes from my many years of working in Foster
Speaker 1: Karen group homes, where I'm like, it doesn't take much,
Speaker 1: So what's the minimum, and I did that minimum to
Speaker 1: give my son a very cushy life, a very cushy crib.
Speaker 1: He's got all the things he needs. Yeah he does. Yeah.
Speaker 1: Now he has like a full sized memory foam mattress,
Speaker 1: and he still chooses the floor beside my bed to sleep.
Speaker 1: You know, you can give him the world and they'll
Speaker 1: choose the floor. Yeah. I played with buttons as a kid.
Speaker 1: I had toys, but what I wanted were the buttons
Speaker 1: in a jar. So there you go. So that's why
Speaker 1: I do the least to the least, and Travis gets
Speaker 1: so many free things he does, I can't even begin
Speaker 1: to say, oh, the free thing, So I think the
Speaker 1: last one I will just say one of the most
Speaker 1: recent ones. So we are redoing the back of our
Speaker 1: house to be a mid term rental, and the upstairs
Speaker 1: everywhere needs flooring, but the upstairs part of the rental,
Speaker 1: we were going to just do the same flooring as
Speaker 1: throughout the house. And Travis was taking something to the
Speaker 1: dump and this was unique because it costs like eleven
Speaker 1: or twelve bucks to dump a load, so he usually
Speaker 1: just takes things in small amounts to his work and
Speaker 1: dumps them at the airport, and that day he just
Speaker 1: went to the dump and paid the eleven twelve bucks.
Speaker 1: But what he got was a contractor who was dumping
Speaker 1: a ton of flooring and he found literally the perfect
Speaker 1: amount of flooring that we needed for the upstairs for
Speaker 1: free at the dump. I love it. So he got
Speaker 1: he cleared out the bed of his truck with the
Speaker 1: things that were not salvageable, and came home with plenty
Speaker 1: that was salvageable. So we played like twelve bucks for
Speaker 1: the flooring in the rental, but we weren't paying for
Speaker 1: the floor and we're just paying for the dump. So
Speaker 1: that was the most recent really cool free thing that
Speaker 1: Travis got. Mm hmm. That's things like this can happen
Speaker 1: outside of buy nothing groups too, just when your eyes
Speaker 1: are open and you're sniffing about when you are engaged
Speaker 1: in your community. It happens because Travis is very engaged,
Speaker 1: uh in where he's at, Like I'm I'm kind of
Speaker 1: like tunnel vision. I'm like a get in, get out
Speaker 1: kind of person. And wherever Travis is, he fully is um.
Speaker 1: He'll talk to people, he will engage, and he gets
Speaker 1: stuff for free. It's a gift. So if it's not you,
Speaker 1: Maybe it's your partner. Yes, see which one of you
Speaker 1: can sniff it out to be an active community member. Well, everyone,
Speaker 1: thanks so much for listening. We hope that this inspires
Speaker 1: you to be a part of your by nothing group,
Speaker 1: give and receive and just enjoy being a bigger part
Speaker 1: of your community. Many of you know we have a
Speaker 1: private community where we do monthly money challenges and offer
Speaker 1: accountability groups, and right now we want to take this
Speaker 1: time to congratulate one of our members for a big win.
Speaker 1: This comes from Brittany, who literally titled it debt payoff
Speaker 1: win exclamation mark, exclamation mark. I was able to pay
Speaker 1: an extra three hundred eighty dollars to debt this month.
Speaker 1: Exclamation work exclamation mark. It's hard to say a bunch
Speaker 1: of times back. That's it. That that's the one sentence,
Speaker 1: and that is the massive win. What was our goal,
Speaker 1: like at least put an extra hundred forwards challenge last month?
Speaker 1: It was do something to make an extra hundred bucks
Speaker 1: to put towards debt. That was the challenge, and she
Speaker 1: quadrupled her debt Like that goal. She exceeded it by
Speaker 1: nearly quad Well, Brittany is a winning. She's of society,
Speaker 1: and I was going to say she's a savage, but
Speaker 1: not positive for me. It's not positive for everyone. But
Speaker 1: Brittany also leads our open accountability groups. So for for
Speaker 1: anybody who doesn't have an accountability group, we have an
Speaker 1: open group that meets once a month that you can
Speaker 1: join in. Brittany leads that. So Brittany Russian, I'm so excited.
Speaker 1: Thanks for listening. If you want to check out our
Speaker 1: monthly challenge community had to Frugal Friends podcast dot com
Speaker 1: slash club to see what challenge we have coming up next.
Speaker 1: See you next time. Frugal Friends is produced by Eric
Speaker 1: Siriannie oh oh Jen, Yes we're in person. We didn't
Speaker 1: mention that we did right now. You won't know unless
Speaker 1: you listen. Yeah. I wonder though, if like are really
Speaker 1: astute listener would be able to tell, like there's something
Speaker 1: different about the dynamic. We look more at our laptops
Speaker 1: and we do at each other. We still do, but
Speaker 1: because it's vulnerable to just like stare at each other's eyes.
Speaker 1: But then also I can get so lost in what
Speaker 1: you're saying when really I do need to be ready
Speaker 1: with like what I'm going to be saying, Max, that's
Speaker 1: part of it. I don't know if that's the case
Speaker 1: for you too, but I'm like, wait a second. I
Speaker 1: can't just only be a listener. I have to be
Speaker 1: an active participant and talk too. So that's sometimes why
Speaker 1: I have to like break focus and look at my
Speaker 1: laptop so that I'm on the ball and not just
Speaker 1: like lost in your eyes. That's a lot to take in.
Speaker 1: I don't listen when you talk. I just focus on
Speaker 1: what I'm going to say. That's kind of what I'm saying.
Speaker 1: I'm still listening and just like preparing for the next thing.
Speaker 1: It's such a It is a different way of interacting
Speaker 1: when you're on the mic, Like, yes, it's a conversation
Speaker 1: between you and I, but we're we are more aware
Speaker 1: of the process of creating something together and giving something
Speaker 1: of value that it can't just be this how hum
Speaker 1: convo where we are actually listening to each other when
Speaker 1: we're just having a conversation. Nobody would want to hear that.
Speaker 1: Nobody wants to hear our conversations. Maybe that's hear us
Speaker 1: when we're actually listening, when we're not talking, when we're
Speaker 1: not talking with an outline like giving each other life updates.
Speaker 1: Our life updates are good though, so they're so good
Speaker 1: actually people would want to listen to them, but they
Speaker 1: should not be repeated. That's probably what I meant, is
Speaker 1: that they should not be recorded or repeated. That's why
Speaker 1: we don't post much behind the scenes stuff. Yeah. I
Speaker 1: did have the idea though, because when we got together,
Speaker 1: we hung out last night, and it made me think
Speaker 1: that it could be a fun thing to do sometimes,
Speaker 1: like give a three bullet point life update, so it's
Speaker 1: just like real quick, like three things. You could choose
Speaker 1: follow up questions or not, just like like three bullet
Speaker 1: point life update now. No, no, no, I'm not prepared
Speaker 1: in the future like our post posts that like hardly
Speaker 1: anyone knows about, just like really quick boom boom boom,
Speaker 1: and like be as vague or specific. Well, I would
Speaker 1: have to be relatively vague and simple. That'd be kind
Speaker 1: of fun. Let's try it out in a vague on purpose.
Speaker 1: I like that. Yeah,