1
00:00:00,040 --> 00:00:02,719
Speaker 1: Today effed up by getting a DNA test and finding

2
00:00:02,720 --> 00:00:06,320
Speaker 1: out my granny got stuffed by another man's meat. The update.

3
00:00:07,560 --> 00:00:09,080
Speaker 2: I've been waiting for this update. John.

4
00:00:09,360 --> 00:00:12,200
Speaker 1: You know, we we got to see who's whose sausage

5
00:00:12,320 --> 00:00:14,400
Speaker 1: granny was gobbling down.

6
00:00:14,800 --> 00:00:20,320
Speaker 2: Right, Glizzie? Was she Goblin Gobbler?

7
00:00:20,320 --> 00:00:25,520
Speaker 1: Over Hazy Gobbler? The Glizzie Goblin. She's the Glizzie Gobblers.

8
00:00:25,520 --> 00:00:28,040
Speaker 1: He's eating that shit like French cobbler.

9
00:00:28,640 --> 00:00:31,160
Speaker 2: That was a good one. She's holding on to it

10
00:00:31,520 --> 00:00:32,440
Speaker 2: like a Hoddler.

11
00:00:32,720 --> 00:00:35,960
Speaker 1: Ooh, we're not talking, bitcoy, we're talking.

12
00:00:36,280 --> 00:00:36,480
Speaker 2: Yeah.

13
00:00:36,520 --> 00:00:39,000
Speaker 1: I guess who's now on top of her. Oh, it

14
00:00:39,040 --> 00:00:40,480
Speaker 1: ain't Grandpa.

15
00:00:40,159 --> 00:00:41,760
Speaker 2: It's the Polish sausager.

16
00:00:42,080 --> 00:00:44,919
Speaker 1: So in my previous post, I said that my grandmother

17
00:00:45,080 --> 00:00:47,800
Speaker 1: promised to tell all when my sister comes to town

18
00:00:47,880 --> 00:00:51,880
Speaker 1: next week. Oh the fable, tell all, tell us please.

19
00:00:52,200 --> 00:00:55,520
Speaker 1: Officially that is still the plan. But my sister, who

20
00:00:55,520 --> 00:00:58,880
Speaker 1: apparently missed her calling as a special prosecutor, got my

21
00:00:58,920 --> 00:01:02,720
Speaker 1: grandmother to admit everything over the phone, and the story

22
00:01:02,760 --> 00:01:08,000
Speaker 1: of what actually happened is interesting. I'm interested due to

23
00:01:08,160 --> 00:01:13,480
Speaker 1: dominated body sausages. I can't stop thinking about that story

24
00:01:13,560 --> 00:01:14,399
Speaker 1: in me back in my.

25
00:01:14,560 --> 00:01:19,400
Speaker 3: Day I was cobblerlimb over the place when your father

26
00:01:19,520 --> 00:01:23,000
Speaker 3: went to the war. You know, I had to keep

27
00:01:23,040 --> 00:01:32,679
Speaker 3: this the Salami cave war. One man that could fill

28
00:01:32,760 --> 00:01:37,039
Speaker 3: that cave. And let's just say, wasn't your grandfather. Only

29
00:01:37,120 --> 00:01:39,240
Speaker 3: thing that was big about that man was his nose.

30
00:01:40,319 --> 00:01:45,240
Speaker 3: It wasn't It wasn't your grandfather. It was his grandfather.

31
00:01:45,959 --> 00:01:49,520
Speaker 3: He knows what he's doing. You say, the First World War,

32
00:01:49,840 --> 00:01:51,520
Speaker 3: but the biggest horse.

33
00:01:52,920 --> 00:01:56,160
Speaker 1: Without getting too much into my family history, when I

34
00:01:56,200 --> 00:01:59,440
Speaker 1: first noticed the inconsistencies in my DNA test, I had

35
00:01:59,480 --> 00:02:03,120
Speaker 1: an early idea, who of who might be my biological

36
00:02:03,280 --> 00:02:04,320
Speaker 1: parental grandfather?

37
00:02:04,600 --> 00:02:07,240
Speaker 2: Oh wait, like they know who it's like? Who it is?

38
00:02:07,680 --> 00:02:13,240
Speaker 1: They they got some ideas? Oh no, okay, Basically, my

39
00:02:13,280 --> 00:02:18,480
Speaker 1: grandmother had a long time family friend. Oh let's just

40
00:02:18,560 --> 00:02:21,520
Speaker 1: say that family friends more than friends. Oh he's getting

41
00:02:21,639 --> 00:02:25,519
Speaker 1: real friendly, really close. And this family friend she had

42
00:02:25,560 --> 00:02:28,800
Speaker 1: known even before my grandfather. Weird friend zone to be

43
00:02:28,880 --> 00:02:32,600
Speaker 1: in moving forward, I'm gonna call him Polish Grandpa and

44
00:02:32,680 --> 00:02:34,760
Speaker 1: the other guy real grandpa.

45
00:02:34,919 --> 00:02:35,280
Speaker 2: Okay.

46
00:02:35,440 --> 00:02:39,240
Speaker 1: She and this friend real Grandpa maintained contact for years

47
00:02:39,280 --> 00:02:42,799
Speaker 1: and years, all the way until both of their second

48
00:02:42,880 --> 00:02:48,799
Speaker 1: spouses had died and they married each other. Wait what okay, well, okay, okay,

49
00:02:49,000 --> 00:02:55,480
Speaker 1: so he's in the family maybe, well, yeah, it sounds

50
00:02:55,560 --> 00:02:57,919
Speaker 1: like it. And their kids had grown up together even

51
00:02:57,960 --> 00:03:01,360
Speaker 1: before they became step siblings as adults. And there's still

52
00:03:01,400 --> 00:03:04,640
Speaker 1: a part of my extended family as quote unquote aunts

53
00:03:04,680 --> 00:03:07,640
Speaker 1: and uncles, even though real grandfather died when I was

54
00:03:07,639 --> 00:03:11,360
Speaker 1: a baby almost thirty years ago. So fake grandpa was

55
00:03:11,360 --> 00:03:15,760
Speaker 1: actually real grandpa, Like step grandpa was real. Yeah, step grandfather, Like, oh,

56
00:03:15,840 --> 00:03:17,639
Speaker 1: he's a part of the family. And it's like, uh,

57
00:03:17,720 --> 00:03:18,360
Speaker 1: yeah he is.

58
00:03:18,440 --> 00:03:18,760
Speaker 2: All right.

59
00:03:18,880 --> 00:03:23,560
Speaker 1: That wasn't That wasn't very surprising. I you know, like, oh,

60
00:03:23,639 --> 00:03:26,360
Speaker 1: who could have done it? Maybe it's the person my

61
00:03:26,400 --> 00:03:29,919
Speaker 1: grandma's married to. Telling this information to Grandma was what

62
00:03:30,080 --> 00:03:33,080
Speaker 1: made her admit it. I was going to be matched

63
00:03:33,200 --> 00:03:36,080
Speaker 1: as a cousin with my sister's best friend.

64
00:03:36,440 --> 00:03:36,720
Speaker 2: Wait.

65
00:03:36,720 --> 00:03:39,840
Speaker 1: Oh man, wait, so they were like matches and they

66
00:03:39,840 --> 00:03:41,400
Speaker 1: were going to date. No, no, no, he was going

67
00:03:41,480 --> 00:03:44,880
Speaker 1: to be matched as a cousin with my sister's best friend.

68
00:03:44,960 --> 00:03:48,440
Speaker 1: Oh I thought, like I thought that the family is

69
00:03:48,480 --> 00:03:50,040
Speaker 1: like as they were step siblings.

70
00:03:50,080 --> 00:03:52,000
Speaker 2: It's like my whole fuck.

71
00:03:51,960 --> 00:03:56,040
Speaker 1: New new Reddit story. Grandma tell me who you fucked

72
00:03:56,080 --> 00:03:59,760
Speaker 1: or I'm gonna fuck my cousin. Tell me now.

73
00:04:00,080 --> 00:04:02,200
Speaker 3: Oh, now, the reprecations will be.

74
00:04:02,240 --> 00:04:05,480
Speaker 1: Dire because my sister's best friend should have had no

75
00:04:05,800 --> 00:04:09,520
Speaker 1: biological relation to me. But here's where it gets a

76
00:04:09,560 --> 00:04:12,840
Speaker 1: little confusing. Oh no, I thought I was already confusing.

77
00:04:12,920 --> 00:04:16,120
Speaker 1: How we solve the confusion? My grandmother claims that Polish

78
00:04:16,200 --> 00:04:19,400
Speaker 1: Grandpa was sterile as the result of something that happened

79
00:04:19,400 --> 00:04:22,479
Speaker 1: to him during World War Two. Uh oh, what his

80
00:04:22,560 --> 00:04:27,600
Speaker 1: sausage got sizzled. She says that all three of her

81
00:04:27,680 --> 00:04:32,359
Speaker 1: children are biologically from real Grandpa, but that it was

82
00:04:32,440 --> 00:04:35,839
Speaker 1: all done intentionally through artificial insemination.

83
00:04:37,560 --> 00:04:42,120
Speaker 2: Hmm was the artificial insemination technology like advance enough.

84
00:04:42,240 --> 00:04:46,760
Speaker 1: But you know, I mean straight turkey based for it? Maybe, Like,

85
00:04:46,880 --> 00:04:49,599
Speaker 1: I don't know, you know, that's that's some old school

86
00:04:49,600 --> 00:04:54,480
Speaker 1: technology throwing it back. Okay, my grandma was doing.

87
00:04:56,279 --> 00:04:57,359
Speaker 2: Hey, heyo.

88
00:04:57,800 --> 00:05:01,320
Speaker 1: She desperately wants us to be a secret from everyone,

89
00:05:01,680 --> 00:05:04,599
Speaker 1: including my dad and his siblings, because she is worried

90
00:05:04,600 --> 00:05:07,200
Speaker 1: that people will assume the worst about her.

91
00:05:07,400 --> 00:05:08,520
Speaker 2: I almos assuming the worst.

92
00:05:09,040 --> 00:05:12,799
Speaker 1: Yeah, I think I think Granny was slipping and sliding

93
00:05:12,839 --> 00:05:15,760
Speaker 1: all over them sausages. My dad and his siblings were

94
00:05:15,760 --> 00:05:18,720
Speaker 1: born in the early nineteen fifties. Does anyone know what

95
00:05:18,800 --> 00:05:22,120
Speaker 1: the odds of this were? How common was artificial insemination

96
00:05:22,279 --> 00:05:25,080
Speaker 1: back then? Would just imagine very common?

97
00:05:25,440 --> 00:05:25,880
Speaker 2: Yeah?

98
00:05:26,200 --> 00:05:30,320
Speaker 1: Definitely less common? Yeah. Would someone have really used a

99
00:05:30,360 --> 00:05:34,400
Speaker 1: friend as a donor more than three separate times? And

100
00:05:34,480 --> 00:05:37,400
Speaker 1: my grandmother had at least one miscarriage that she told

101
00:05:37,440 --> 00:05:42,279
Speaker 1: me about at some point, so could be four. Yeah,

102
00:05:42,360 --> 00:05:44,760
Speaker 1: I don't know, man, it sounds like she was getting

103
00:05:45,200 --> 00:05:49,640
Speaker 1: railed regularly by this guy. My grandmother has a known

104
00:05:49,720 --> 00:05:54,960
Speaker 1: history of rewriting events in her favor. I guess Grandma's like, right,

105
00:05:55,000 --> 00:05:57,920
Speaker 1: I'm gonna say Grandma's like, I'm I'm team Grandma. I'll

106
00:05:57,920 --> 00:06:00,559
Speaker 1: explain my thought process later. I guess it really doesn't

107
00:06:00,600 --> 00:06:04,039
Speaker 1: matter at this point why real grandfather was the father,

108
00:06:04,520 --> 00:06:06,760
Speaker 1: but it is frustrating to feel like she might be

109
00:06:06,839 --> 00:06:09,760
Speaker 1: throwing in more lies on top of everything.

110
00:06:10,040 --> 00:06:10,200
Speaker 2: Now.

111
00:06:10,240 --> 00:06:12,280
Speaker 1: A lot of people asked to know which DNA test

112
00:06:12,320 --> 00:06:14,520
Speaker 1: I used. I used my heritage, but I have no

113
00:06:14,560 --> 00:06:16,640
Speaker 1: idea if it's better than the others. I picked it

114
00:06:16,839 --> 00:06:18,720
Speaker 1: just because it was the cheapest, And a lot of

115
00:06:18,760 --> 00:06:21,159
Speaker 1: people wanted to tell me that these tests are not

116
00:06:21,440 --> 00:06:25,560
Speaker 1: very accurate. That's what all the spouses who were cheated

117
00:06:25,600 --> 00:06:30,680
Speaker 1: on say exactly what I took it in It said

118
00:06:30,800 --> 00:06:33,240
Speaker 1: that my wife would have had to cheat on me,

119
00:06:33,320 --> 00:06:36,400
Speaker 1: so it was false. I don't really know what to

120
00:06:36,440 --> 00:06:38,680
Speaker 1: say or what to expect. All I know is that

121
00:06:38,720 --> 00:06:41,760
Speaker 1: I was accurate enough to say I didn't have any

122
00:06:41,800 --> 00:06:46,560
Speaker 1: Polish ancestry, and my grandma was on another man's sausage.

123
00:06:47,360 --> 00:06:50,240
Speaker 1: It sounds like grandma's keeping something like. It sounds like

124
00:06:50,240 --> 00:06:54,800
Speaker 1: grandma's lying. Yeah, what do you think? Oh yeah, what's

125
00:06:54,839 --> 00:07:01,560
Speaker 1: your so? If so? Okay, assuming that uh, the Polish

126
00:07:01,560 --> 00:07:03,560
Speaker 1: her and the Polish grandpa were having sex. If they

127
00:07:03,680 --> 00:07:05,480
Speaker 1: if they never had sex, then that makes it simple.

128
00:07:06,040 --> 00:07:09,040
Speaker 1: But what if they were. She was hooking up with

129
00:07:09,200 --> 00:07:12,120
Speaker 1: Polish grandpa and real grandpa.

130
00:07:12,720 --> 00:07:14,160
Speaker 2: I think that's exactly what she was doing.

131
00:07:14,360 --> 00:07:20,520
Speaker 1: But like but if but if Polish grandpa is infertile, yeah,

132
00:07:20,520 --> 00:07:23,040
Speaker 1: maybe maybe she did. I believe that Polish grandpa is

133
00:07:23,200 --> 00:07:26,679
Speaker 1: like it could be infertile. That makes sense, that's true,

134
00:07:27,800 --> 00:07:30,160
Speaker 1: that's true. So she took she took that little bit

135
00:07:30,240 --> 00:07:32,800
Speaker 1: and it's like, let me just sprinkle a little dash

136
00:07:32,880 --> 00:07:36,600
Speaker 1: on here. And he was but maybe maybe maybe Polish

137
00:07:36,640 --> 00:07:42,080
Speaker 1: Grandpa wasn't infertile, but he wasn't like he wasn't told that,

138
00:07:42,640 --> 00:07:46,680
Speaker 1: and so like it was like he just thought, oh

139
00:07:46,760 --> 00:07:48,360
Speaker 1: I I I beat it.

140
00:07:48,480 --> 00:07:49,360
Speaker 2: I had kids.

141
00:07:49,800 --> 00:07:53,400
Speaker 1: And maybe she probably knew because they probably were trying

142
00:07:53,600 --> 00:07:55,760
Speaker 1: doing the deed and she's like, I'm not getting any

143
00:07:55,760 --> 00:07:58,840
Speaker 1: buns in my oven. And all of a sudden, someone else,

144
00:07:59,000 --> 00:08:01,800
Speaker 1: this family friend, comes like, hey, let me help you.

145
00:08:01,960 --> 00:08:03,920
Speaker 1: So let me be a good neighbor and lend you

146
00:08:04,000 --> 00:08:04,720
Speaker 1: some sugar.

147
00:08:05,160 --> 00:08:05,600
Speaker 2: Oh boy,