WEBVTT - EP 455: The Truth About Egg Freezing (feat. Zuri Hall) 0:00:00.280 --> 0:00:02.760 Welcome to Decisions Decisions. I don't think you should say 0:00:02.800 --> 0:00:06.000 decisions decisions. It sounded like you was talking to Kirsty. 0:00:06.440 --> 0:00:09.400 You definitely say to welcome, welcome to the new podcast. 0:00:10.400 --> 0:00:13.960 Oh wait, you want to say together the decisions Decisions. 0:00:14.000 --> 0:00:19.040 Hey guys, welcome to another episode of the Sisy Hall 0:00:19.360 --> 0:00:22.880 To Sisy Hall, Listen, my vocals ain't really hit him. 0:00:23.400 --> 0:00:27.400 But I'll never be a superstar singer, but I am 0:00:28.120 --> 0:00:31.440 maybe be Aka paid the sign Aka debts Beach. 0:00:31.760 --> 0:00:34.600 Hey, y'all, I'm weazy. Welcome back to another episode of 0:00:34.600 --> 0:00:38.560 our show. We have a guest today and her bio 0:00:38.640 --> 0:00:40.320 is so long that I'm gonna have to pick my 0:00:40.520 --> 0:00:46.600 favorite things to say. Missouri Hall. She's an any award 0:00:46.640 --> 0:00:49.479 winning TV personality who would be known from what I 0:00:49.560 --> 0:00:54.640 know eve Redcarpet, NBC's Access Hollywood, bringing the energy and empathy. 0:00:55.320 --> 0:01:00.320 She's to who email this growned us? 0:01:00.480 --> 0:01:05.760 Okay warrior, Oh you're from Ohio anyway. She's also a 0:01:05.760 --> 0:01:08.080 global ambassador for the Global Fund of Children. Oh, we 0:01:08.120 --> 0:01:11.440 only talk about the ones that we and yeah, I'll 0:01:11.440 --> 0:01:13.440 don't say it's kids all day over. 0:01:13.480 --> 0:01:17.000 The nois the kids that assault. 0:01:17.240 --> 0:01:20.759 We love the kids, but Zouri Hall is a season host. 0:01:20.840 --> 0:01:23.480 She's known from covering anything from Vanity Fair to Vogue, 0:01:23.520 --> 0:01:24.319 is a style star. 0:01:24.840 --> 0:01:28.200 So I want you guys give it that for Hi, Hi, Hi, 0:01:28.520 --> 0:01:29.520 thank you, thank you for that. 0:01:29.760 --> 0:01:32.280 But I also apologize that you were subjected to have 0:01:32.800 --> 0:01:33.880 to edit that real time. 0:01:34.080 --> 0:01:36.120 Hell up, no, I will tell you this. 0:01:36.319 --> 0:01:38.160 Like we've been talking about having uri, I feel like 0:01:38.240 --> 0:01:41.000 we all alongstage each other something, come on, come on. 0:01:41.520 --> 0:01:45.559 But the reason this one episode happen is the egg 0:01:45.600 --> 0:01:46.600 freezing journeys. 0:01:46.760 --> 0:01:48.200 You're the second person on my timeline. 0:01:48.200 --> 0:01:50.400 I've been seeing Cammy Crawford talk about everything from her 0:01:50.400 --> 0:01:54.240 experience to money, and it was just like, Okay, let's 0:01:54.320 --> 0:01:54.960 let's do this. 0:01:55.080 --> 0:01:55.280 Yeah. 0:01:55.640 --> 0:01:58.920 And I know that women listening you may want to 0:01:58.920 --> 0:02:01.080 have kids, may not want to kids, may not. 0:02:01.000 --> 0:02:02.640 Even give a shait or say fuck them kids too. 0:02:03.000 --> 0:02:05.080 But I think just even knowing about it, because all 0:02:05.120 --> 0:02:07.440 of our friends that are at this age maybe have 0:02:07.480 --> 0:02:09.240 tossed the idea. And I don't really know how to 0:02:09.240 --> 0:02:11.600 get in conversation about egg freezing as much. 0:02:11.919 --> 0:02:13.160 I've had three friends do it. 0:02:13.280 --> 0:02:17.400 So two of them went through egg freezing for they 0:02:17.400 --> 0:02:21.400 were diagnosed with breast cancer. So having to have their 0:02:21.400 --> 0:02:24.560 eggs frozen before going through chemo, and then another friend 0:02:24.560 --> 0:02:30.360 of mine currently has gone through I think two rounds total, 0:02:30.600 --> 0:02:34.959 still hasn't gotten everything, but two rounds of IVF for 0:02:35.200 --> 0:02:39.640 diminishing ovarian syndrome, which this is my first time hearing 0:02:39.639 --> 0:02:41.720 about it, and I've talked about it because it's a lot. 0:02:42.560 --> 0:02:45.440 She's younger than me, so early thirties. 0:02:45.600 --> 0:02:50.480 And literally trying to save it for later and realize 0:02:50.840 --> 0:02:53.600 so diminishing ovarian syndrome. Basically, even when you have IVF, 0:02:54.280 --> 0:02:56.600 they want to be able to get ten eggs. 0:02:56.440 --> 0:02:58.000 Out of you during this process. 0:02:58.360 --> 0:03:01.359 Now, the IVF is to make you, you know, get 0:03:01.400 --> 0:03:03.000 more eggs and make them. They have to be a 0:03:03.000 --> 0:03:05.480 certain size for them to even retrieve them, for them 0:03:05.520 --> 0:03:07.240 to be able to be considered healthy, for them to 0:03:07.240 --> 0:03:07.840 be able. 0:03:07.639 --> 0:03:08.680 To be frozen. 0:03:09.320 --> 0:03:12.560 Mind you, they can insert this egg later and it 0:03:12.600 --> 0:03:15.240 still doesn't mean it's going to be a full a 0:03:15.320 --> 0:03:20.200 full egg. So basically her going through this, her egg 0:03:20.240 --> 0:03:24.280 count is just drastically low. She has no reason why, 0:03:24.480 --> 0:03:26.800 like and it's just something that's rare. They can't really 0:03:26.840 --> 0:03:31.160 explain it. So in her early thirties, she's not producing 0:03:31.200 --> 0:03:34.120 eggs like she should. So she's gone through two rounds 0:03:34.120 --> 0:03:38.440 and only has three eggs. Three and mind you, with 0:03:38.640 --> 0:03:42.360 insurance it doesn't really matter. It's cost her over seven 0:03:42.400 --> 0:03:46.520 thousand dollars each time for this process help cover some 0:03:46.560 --> 0:03:49.640 of it, some of it, but also the medication that 0:03:49.680 --> 0:03:52.760 she's had to take, and because she has not as 0:03:52.800 --> 0:03:55.480 many eggs, she has to keep doing it. But one 0:03:55.480 --> 0:03:56.800 of the things I do want to share before we 0:03:56.840 --> 0:03:58.560 get into this because it's one of the most amazing 0:03:58.640 --> 0:04:02.880 things Facebook groups. So she was spending so much money 0:04:02.960 --> 0:04:07.760 on the medication. There's women that during their IVF journeys 0:04:08.120 --> 0:04:14.280 end up seriously getting pregnant, like from naturally. And so 0:04:14.360 --> 0:04:16.920 what's dope is if you're in whatever city you are, 0:04:17.160 --> 0:04:20.440 there's normally groups of women that are doing IVF and 0:04:20.480 --> 0:04:24.600 they'll hey, guys, I got my magical baby. If y'all 0:04:24.720 --> 0:04:27.440 if you need any medication, I haven't, And so there's 0:04:27.480 --> 0:04:30.520 women that like share their medications. But yeah, I think 0:04:30.880 --> 0:04:34.599 being being thirty five and having so many friends go 0:04:34.760 --> 0:04:39.120 through fertility journeys in the way that they have, especially 0:04:39.120 --> 0:04:42.880 through egg freezing, has been really interesting to like learn, Yeah, firsthand. 0:04:42.400 --> 0:04:45.200 It's fascinating and it feels like everyone just pops up 0:04:45.240 --> 0:04:48.279 all at once talking about yes, which is awesome but 0:04:48.360 --> 0:04:51.560 also points to what kind of threw me for a 0:04:51.600 --> 0:04:54.440 loop of why was nobody talking about this when we 0:04:54.520 --> 0:04:58.159 were younger and could have been seriously considering their options. 0:04:58.240 --> 0:05:00.560 Right. We're always told, you've guys so much. 0:05:00.400 --> 0:05:03.000 Time, don't worry about it, don't think of like girl, 0:05:03.040 --> 0:05:05.440 focus on your career, do your thing. That is true, 0:05:05.720 --> 0:05:08.640 but there is also the biological truth of what our 0:05:08.720 --> 0:05:11.640 bodies are going to do. And so when I was 0:05:11.640 --> 0:05:14.000 in my twenties, you always think the guy is going 0:05:14.080 --> 0:05:14.800 to be the guy, and it's like. 0:05:14.880 --> 0:05:17.240 The next guy I mean to get girlfud look at him. 0:05:17.240 --> 0:05:19.480 I'll be like, that's our wedding and it's going to 0:05:19.520 --> 0:05:21.360 be where that's my king. 0:05:21.640 --> 0:05:24.200 I'm ready. So that's not how that went. 0:05:24.400 --> 0:05:28.880 And I remember in my late twenties, when I ended 0:05:28.920 --> 0:05:31.479 the relationship that I was in, I was like, you 0:05:31.480 --> 0:05:33.119 know what, I should probably freeze my eggs. 0:05:33.120 --> 0:05:34.080 I always thought I would. 0:05:33.880 --> 0:05:36.160 Be You had this thought in your late twenties, Yes, 0:05:36.560 --> 0:05:37.400 oh okay, but. 0:05:37.320 --> 0:05:40.080 I did not do it, and I don't believe it. Regrets. 0:05:40.240 --> 0:05:42.480 Okay, if I could do that one more time, I 0:05:42.520 --> 0:05:45.880 would because at the time I was at NBC Universal still, 0:05:45.920 --> 0:05:49.120 so I've been at NBC for ten years, but business wise, 0:05:49.160 --> 0:05:51.480 like I was an employee for those first four or 0:05:51.520 --> 0:05:54.159 five years, the last half of my tenure there, I've 0:05:54.160 --> 0:05:57.120 been alone out my own business right myself. But that 0:05:57.200 --> 0:06:00.800 also means I'm covering my own insurance. And I'm employed 0:06:00.839 --> 0:06:05.279 by Zuri Hall and back then because I was an employee, 0:06:05.440 --> 0:06:09.560 they had incredible benefits. So late twenties, broke up with 0:06:09.640 --> 0:06:11.800 the guy I was with, decided I want to freeze 0:06:11.839 --> 0:06:14.200 my eggs. I was working down stop. I was so busy. 0:06:14.480 --> 0:06:17.240 I tried calling. They were like, call your insurance do this. 0:06:18.000 --> 0:06:19.680 Two days into that, I was like, I don't have 0:06:19.839 --> 0:06:22.719 time for this. I would literally rather just figure it 0:06:22.720 --> 0:06:24.880 out whoever my marriage. Yeah, even go through all of 0:06:24.920 --> 0:06:27.800 this insurance stuff because it was so complicated, it wasn't 0:06:27.839 --> 0:06:30.280 easy and I was busy, so I didn't do it, 0:06:30.400 --> 0:06:33.520 even though they covered almost one hundred percent. No way, 0:06:33.720 --> 0:06:35.240 I don't know what I was doing. Well, I know 0:06:35.360 --> 0:06:39.120 I wasn't thinking because I was overworked, exhausted and just 0:06:39.120 --> 0:06:41.479 trying to get through the days. So I didn't end 0:06:41.560 --> 0:06:45.360 up doing it, even though they covered almost the entire procedure. 0:06:45.360 --> 0:06:48.119 And then around. 0:06:47.640 --> 0:06:50.279 Early to mid thirties I started thinking about it again. 0:06:50.760 --> 0:06:52.720 It was because there are things that I want in 0:06:52.720 --> 0:06:54.760 my life. I want to be married, I want to 0:06:54.760 --> 0:06:58.559 have children. I don't want anything in my life more 0:06:58.600 --> 0:07:00.320 than having it and making sure it feel right. 0:07:00.600 --> 0:07:03.360 And a lot of the questions like we're gonna talk 0:07:03.360 --> 0:07:05.920 to you about today are not even just the process, 0:07:05.920 --> 0:07:08.960 but like why because I think some of the things 0:07:08.960 --> 0:07:12.240 that was interesting to me When Cammy froze her eggs, 0:07:12.240 --> 0:07:13.960 I saw a lot of comments like but you got 0:07:14.040 --> 0:07:17.480 me in yeah, you know, and so like that's the ignorance, right, 0:07:17.480 --> 0:07:18.280 They don't get it. 0:07:18.600 --> 0:07:19.200 They don't get it. 0:07:19.240 --> 0:07:21.200 I think it's great to talk about, like even the 0:07:21.280 --> 0:07:23.760 quantity of kids they want to have or just whatever. 0:07:23.800 --> 0:07:27.800 We just are always swing everybody else's couscy. Now we're 0:07:27.800 --> 0:07:32.400 not gonna get yours yet. So we have a few 0:07:32.440 --> 0:07:34.520 lookings to play with you in our favorite game, really, 0:07:34.560 --> 0:07:36.200 I feel like, because it's a fun one to play 0:07:36.280 --> 0:07:36.920 is poetry. 0:07:37.200 --> 0:07:38.240 But we're gonna do a. 0:07:38.520 --> 0:07:40.840 Song, singing it like it's poetry or reading it like 0:07:40.880 --> 0:07:43.400 it's poetry, and you have to guess the song. You 0:07:43.440 --> 0:07:48.440 absolutely know this song, do what you gotta do, keep 0:07:48.480 --> 0:07:49.400 me up all night. 0:07:50.720 --> 0:07:58.960 Hurt, what you canna do night period? 0:08:00.240 --> 0:08:00.520 I'm on. 0:08:02.880 --> 0:08:06.120 Yes, go so good, dam bo good? That mixed up 0:08:06.240 --> 0:08:09.200 like I'm a twelve good Okay, wait. 0:08:09.000 --> 0:08:10.920 Now I want to give you one that don't push 0:08:10.960 --> 0:08:13.600 me too. She said, all right, witch, I got it. Next. 0:08:13.600 --> 0:08:16.440 What's the next game? Because I got one like this one? 0:08:17.480 --> 0:08:21.960 I can't remember. No, Literally that was to me. Lyrics 0:08:21.960 --> 0:08:24.040 are what you know? You know, it's crazy. I make 0:08:24.120 --> 0:08:24.880 up lyrics so much. 0:08:25.040 --> 0:08:29.280 Say I don't know what wait out like that you 0:08:29.280 --> 0:08:31.400 could literally say to the window, to the wall, and 0:08:31.440 --> 0:08:34.160 I'm be like, when what dropped. 0:08:33.880 --> 0:08:36.000 Down the ball dropping? 0:08:36.240 --> 0:08:39.560 No no, no, like when I when I remember. 0:08:39.720 --> 0:08:41.840 I have a I have a homeboy who loves R 0:08:41.880 --> 0:08:42.160 and B. 0:08:42.640 --> 0:08:45.280 And literally like we get to where we'll play, we'll 0:08:45.280 --> 0:08:47.440 play like card games and ship it's R and B 0:08:47.520 --> 0:08:49.360 and we're just saying at the top of our lungs 0:08:49.400 --> 0:08:52.040 all together in unison. So he puts on I want 0:08:52.080 --> 0:08:54.880 to say, it's one twelve Cupid. And so it gets 0:08:54.880 --> 0:08:58.240 to a part and I say truth is and they're like, 0:08:59.080 --> 0:09:03.080 did you just say through truth is? Apparently it's Cupid 0:09:04.559 --> 0:09:07.200 would have got them song and I made up a 0:09:07.280 --> 0:09:10.960 whole another line and my last podcast used to be 0:09:11.040 --> 0:09:12.000 music Bitch. 0:09:12.120 --> 0:09:16.920 I would literally be making up lyrics not all made 0:09:16.960 --> 0:09:22.840 up truth. Kid is nuts, but it's cupid. I don't 0:09:22.840 --> 0:09:27.480 know that young tongue song live live, live loud thing. Yes, 0:09:27.600 --> 0:09:30.280 I'm gonna tell you, no one knows that lyric. Wait 0:09:32.720 --> 0:09:35.760 do it more? Wait, A lot of ship just live 0:09:36.280 --> 0:09:38.679 in lives. What is it? Came from the bottom to 0:09:38.840 --> 0:09:43.599 the top. My life's out. I just hopping on lifestyle. 0:09:44.840 --> 0:09:47.160 That's it, you know what I mean. But we didn't 0:09:47.200 --> 0:09:53.040 know what Missy was staying with reversed. It was a 0:09:53.080 --> 0:09:55.600 sisence that was really reversed ReBs. 0:09:55.679 --> 0:10:00.880 It literally reversed bit And I was like you, maybe 0:10:00.920 --> 0:10:03.600 this is another language because wait, it was at the 0:10:03.600 --> 0:10:05.240 time when that came out. It was at the time 0:10:05.280 --> 0:10:08.480 when like we we as hip hop. I will say, 0:10:08.520 --> 0:10:11.640 I'm blaming y'all culturally appropriated like India. 0:10:11.720 --> 0:10:15.079 So they were like to th thing they had what. 0:10:15.240 --> 0:10:18.360 They didn't say it like god, bro, I'm thinking, like. 0:10:18.400 --> 0:10:20.720 Those words didn't make it India. There was the beat. 0:10:21.200 --> 0:10:25.120 I mean, same thing. Maybe Asian toya gotta mean something. 0:10:25.760 --> 0:10:32.120 It sound like it means something in Asian. Okay, now 0:10:32.240 --> 0:10:33.400 I signed this other game. 0:10:33.520 --> 0:10:35.000 I just made this ship up, so I'm not as 0:10:35.040 --> 0:10:38.360 gonna go one, two, three? Oh okay. 0:10:38.360 --> 0:10:40.720 I got this question and I never one. The second 0:10:40.760 --> 0:10:42.600 one is two okay, and the next one is three. 0:10:43.360 --> 0:10:43.840 Okay. 0:10:44.080 --> 0:10:45.920 You have to craft the perfect date night, but you 0:10:45.960 --> 0:10:49.240 could only go to one place? Where would it be? 0:10:49.440 --> 0:10:52.520 Think of the vibes in activity? Is there fooding around? 0:10:52.720 --> 0:10:54.800 Hottailor's definitely food all of it? 0:10:55.000 --> 0:10:56.839 Okay? Where do you take someone for the perfect date? 0:10:57.040 --> 0:10:57.880 Perfect dating? 0:10:57.920 --> 0:10:58.000 Oh? 0:10:58.080 --> 0:10:58.120 No? 0:10:58.320 --> 0:10:59.839 Where does she want to be taken to? Or where 0:10:59.840 --> 0:11:00.559 does she takes something? 0:11:00.600 --> 0:11:03.840 Doesn't have to be a hard thing, Okay, maybe plentying 0:11:03.840 --> 0:11:06.280 a great day one place, one place that. 0:11:09.200 --> 0:11:11.559 What's the one place? And I'll see you later at 0:11:11.600 --> 0:11:12.160 five o'clock? 0:11:12.240 --> 0:11:12.360 Right? 0:11:12.440 --> 0:11:16.520 This is such a fun after there? Okay? One place 0:11:16.600 --> 0:11:18.800 that is a really fun question. 0:11:21.040 --> 0:11:25.160 I mean it's kind of like cliche. 0:11:25.520 --> 0:11:26.600 Yes, what I think? 0:11:26.640 --> 0:11:29.679 The reason it works a spot like Dave and Busters, right, 0:11:29.760 --> 0:11:31.000 or something where you can have. 0:11:31.040 --> 0:11:34.120 In our cage, Yes, an arcade because they have food. 0:11:34.120 --> 0:11:36.680 They got drinks there so you can have a little appetizer, 0:11:36.720 --> 0:11:38.160 little life by maybe one drink. 0:11:38.400 --> 0:11:42.240 I read something recently and then whoop. You know what 0:11:42.280 --> 0:11:44.600 I mean. You get to talk, youre is, you get 0:11:44.640 --> 0:11:46.480 to go back and forth. Stakes are high. 0:11:46.559 --> 0:11:48.959 You can see what their competition game is like all 0:11:49.000 --> 0:11:52.319 they get when they are overly comoyfriend just. 0:11:52.240 --> 0:11:55.120 Made a comment about okay, sorry, now I'm taking it. 0:11:55.960 --> 0:11:57.800 We went on a throttle day. This girl we see 0:11:57.800 --> 0:12:00.680 and we took her to vote. He was okay, but 0:12:00.679 --> 0:12:02.360 we'd already had sex. It was in our next date. 0:12:02.400 --> 0:12:05.720 But he was like, I don't really like activity dates 0:12:05.800 --> 0:12:09.040 because I feel like I'm not in the flirty vibe 0:12:09.080 --> 0:12:12.080 because we're too competitive and we're like now he's like 0:12:12.080 --> 0:12:14.360 with bowling, like it's her turn, then you go play. 0:12:14.440 --> 0:12:17.040 Now it's me and her talking. Know how you that is? 0:12:17.320 --> 0:12:19.200 You gotta slept the ass. 0:12:20.240 --> 0:12:22.080 No, you gotta, you gotta make it warning, you gotta 0:12:22.120 --> 0:12:26.680 start making best make its up. I get to lick 0:12:26.760 --> 0:12:30.000 them nipples to not like I do that. I do 0:12:30.320 --> 0:12:32.160 I do that for oh no, like if you make 0:12:32.200 --> 0:12:34.520 it if you don't want to make it like super friendly, 0:12:34.559 --> 0:12:37.199 you don't you want to make it sexual like you 0:12:37.240 --> 0:12:37.920 just make every you. 0:12:37.880 --> 0:12:40.120 Turn everything into it because you're separate. 0:12:40.240 --> 0:12:44.479 But I do like activity if it's like playing games together. 0:12:44.480 --> 0:12:46.720 For sure, and that makes it a little trigger. 0:12:47.120 --> 0:12:50.160 I've never navigated to throttle dynamics, so I would imagine 0:12:50.200 --> 0:12:52.439 when it's one and two and then once sitting back, 0:12:52.480 --> 0:12:55.440 that's a little tricky or vice versa. But I think, yeah, 0:12:55.559 --> 0:12:58.679 to your point, it can be whatever you make it. 0:12:59.000 --> 0:13:01.840 It can't do with sexual You can just be chill friendly. 0:13:01.880 --> 0:13:05.040 And I feel like I don't have to do it. 0:13:05.400 --> 0:13:07.480 And and if anyone has ever gone, I went on 0:13:07.520 --> 0:13:09.920 a date before I left New York to there's like 0:13:10.000 --> 0:13:13.040 an arcade in Chinatown, but it's like all these old 0:13:13.120 --> 0:13:16.800 school games, and just from a nostalgic being in your 0:13:16.840 --> 0:13:19.640 thirties and playing pat Man and ship like that, I 0:13:19.760 --> 0:13:22.640 was like, oh, this is really cute, like and so 0:13:22.760 --> 0:13:23.200 it was fun. 0:13:23.240 --> 0:13:24.680 And then after that you get to go get fucking 0:13:24.760 --> 0:13:27.240 dumplings and boba tate exactly. You know, well that's adding 0:13:27.240 --> 0:13:28.839 to Okay, now, now I'm gonna really sound like a 0:13:28.920 --> 0:13:34.400 hu tar me out, Okay, no judgment listening. We listen 0:13:34.480 --> 0:13:37.520 and we judged. We listening and we judged the perfect date. 0:13:37.760 --> 0:13:39.480 So to me, the perfect date means you spend like 0:13:39.520 --> 0:13:41.920 all day together, okay, and I can only go one place. 0:13:42.600 --> 0:13:44.920 Okay, let's say we're in l A. I'm gonna pick. 0:13:46.520 --> 0:13:49.160 Let's say the addition, Okay, we're gonna go to the 0:13:49.200 --> 0:13:51.240 pool during the day. Then we're gonna go to the 0:13:51.240 --> 0:13:53.880 spa that you're cheating, and then we're gonna have to. 0:13:58.640 --> 0:14:02.640 You see how she changed. Question. Now, here's number two. 0:14:02.800 --> 0:14:03.760 Me while I'm at David. 0:14:03.600 --> 0:14:08.040 Buster's for two hours speaking to two not like what 0:14:08.120 --> 0:14:08.719 I need to be in this. 0:14:08.840 --> 0:14:09.440 Mine's three. 0:14:09.760 --> 0:14:14.160 You're me your dream man physically fine as books, but 0:14:14.240 --> 0:14:16.400 he can only excel in two out of the five 0:14:16.480 --> 0:14:17.280 love languages. 0:14:18.120 --> 0:14:19.080 So what are they going to be? 0:14:19.120 --> 0:14:24.480 For a reminder for everyone here, words of affirmation, quality time, gifts, 0:14:24.800 --> 0:14:27.080 acts of service, and physical touch. 0:14:28.120 --> 0:14:30.240 Fine, he only gonna be good at two of them. 0:14:32.240 --> 0:14:35.360 That is a great question. My love languages were one 0:14:35.360 --> 0:14:38.520 thing for so many years. I got curious about myself 0:14:38.560 --> 0:14:40.160 and how I changed since the last time I took 0:14:40.200 --> 0:14:42.400 the test, which would have been seven or eight years ago, 0:14:42.960 --> 0:14:44.240 and was surprised to. 0:14:44.160 --> 0:14:46.440 Realize, no, they changed. 0:14:46.520 --> 0:14:48.600 She changed, which is such a reflection of where I 0:14:48.600 --> 0:14:50.160 am in my life now makes. 0:14:50.760 --> 0:14:53.240 Matters in so these days? 0:14:53.280 --> 0:14:55.520 My number one is quality time, So he's got to 0:14:55.560 --> 0:14:56.200 be good at that. 0:14:56.200 --> 0:14:59.240 That matters to me. I work a lot. I would 0:14:59.320 --> 0:15:01.080 imagine he very busy too. 0:15:01.280 --> 0:15:04.200 In a perfect world, he's doing something and that he 0:15:04.280 --> 0:15:06.680 loves and is passionate about, and so our time together 0:15:06.760 --> 0:15:08.160 becomes all the more sacred. 0:15:08.240 --> 0:15:12.560 So quality times work, So that now what else is 0:15:12.600 --> 0:15:13.160 finance too? 0:15:16.320 --> 0:15:20.640 You know when I say it's fine, those. 0:15:19.680 --> 0:15:21.800 Are my facto service. I was gonna say, act. 0:15:21.600 --> 0:15:23.560 Of service and quality time are like why are they 0:15:23.600 --> 0:15:26.920 for you? So it used to be gifts and physical touch? 0:15:26.960 --> 0:15:29.720 Are you saying like if if a if a man 0:15:30.200 --> 0:15:32.680 got me gifts and fucked me good, just another man? 0:15:33.880 --> 0:15:36.000 But now someone who can come in and just make 0:15:36.040 --> 0:15:39.080 my life simpler, Like I want someone who adds and 0:15:39.120 --> 0:15:42.240 makes Like this is gonna sound so cliche, we saying 0:15:42.240 --> 0:15:45.440 cliche shit up here today, but like saying, you want 0:15:45.440 --> 0:15:47.680 someone to be your peace. So for me, if you 0:15:47.760 --> 0:15:50.600 can come in and make my life easier, like and 0:15:50.640 --> 0:15:54.240 it's so funny because one of the things that I mean, 0:15:54.280 --> 0:15:55.880 I get made fun of on here if a man 0:15:55.880 --> 0:15:56.600 come to my house. 0:15:56.720 --> 0:15:57.960 But like my boyfriend just. 0:15:57.960 --> 0:16:00.400 Recently did in the house, make one of my boyfriends, 0:16:01.040 --> 0:16:03.480 but he came over, spent some time in Atlanta and 0:16:03.560 --> 0:16:06.440 before leaving for his flight. Not only did he make 0:16:06.440 --> 0:16:08.640 my bed, he took the trash out. He don't even 0:16:08.720 --> 0:16:11.400 live to ask, didn't have to ask. He started picking 0:16:11.440 --> 0:16:13.320 up the bags, the empty bottles because we had a 0:16:13.320 --> 0:16:16.320 good time, and he's like, where's your where's your dumpster? 0:16:16.400 --> 0:16:17.720 I want to make sure I take your trash out 0:16:17.760 --> 0:16:19.840 before I leave, And I'm just like he listened to 0:16:19.840 --> 0:16:22.800 the No, he's never will wed. 0:16:22.840 --> 0:16:26.000 He ain't nothing. No, he's had this trash cank for 0:16:26.160 --> 0:16:28.280 five years. Well, it's not even that. 0:16:28.400 --> 0:16:31.640 I was in my first relationship at twenty nine going 0:16:31.640 --> 0:16:35.360 to the thirty right, that relationship, how you said seven 0:16:35.440 --> 0:16:38.560 years ago it was one way, seven years later, it's another. 0:16:38.640 --> 0:16:41.480 It's because I went through this relationship and I was 0:16:41.520 --> 0:16:44.240 able to be like, this is what I like, and 0:16:44.280 --> 0:16:47.280 it had nothing to do with any gifts he bought me. Yes, 0:16:47.360 --> 0:16:50.160 sex was great, but it started to be it was 0:16:50.200 --> 0:16:52.960 an intimate thing that I started appreciating with my partners 0:16:53.280 --> 0:16:54.760 and then it changed to that. But those are my 0:16:54.840 --> 0:16:58.280 top two right there as well. And I don't think 0:16:58.400 --> 0:17:01.280 men know how to show up that way fully. So 0:17:01.360 --> 0:17:03.600 when you get it, like a lot of men will 0:17:03.640 --> 0:17:06.000 lead with their wallets. So that's the gift giving right. 0:17:06.119 --> 0:17:08.199 Then you have, of course physical touch. You have a 0:17:08.240 --> 0:17:10.760 man that'll you know, do all those things. And then 0:17:10.760 --> 0:17:13.000 words of affirmations has always been the last one. I 0:17:13.000 --> 0:17:14.920 don't need you to I don't have a praise kid, 0:17:14.960 --> 0:17:17.320 and I know that that's something. But yeah, the older 0:17:17.359 --> 0:17:21.000 you get those other two. Oh baby, yeah, take trash. 0:17:21.400 --> 0:17:33.439 I'm gonna be like this. Listen. Are you ready for 0:17:33.480 --> 0:17:35.120 the three? Yes? Three? Yes? 0:17:35.320 --> 0:17:37.280 This one is simple. Now I call it a whole bag. 0:17:37.320 --> 0:17:39.960 I'm sure a nice lady like call it the overnight bag. 0:17:40.040 --> 0:17:43.320 Yes, the overnight bag. You can only put three things 0:17:43.320 --> 0:17:47.480 in the bag. Oh what are those three? Oh my god? Okay, 0:17:47.640 --> 0:17:48.360 overnight bag. 0:17:48.560 --> 0:17:50.600 Now, let's just say you know, you know you're gonna 0:17:50.600 --> 0:17:52.400 be over there that night, but also he might take 0:17:52.440 --> 0:17:56.840 you somewhere the next day. No, no, no, hey, that 0:17:56.960 --> 0:17:59.400 is a let's just say it's not the fit. 0:17:59.480 --> 0:18:01.239 But what's in the what's in the bat and what 0:18:01.280 --> 0:18:01.879 do I need? 0:18:02.800 --> 0:18:06.760 I'm going to assume that there is listening, toothpaste and 0:18:06.840 --> 0:18:08.160 an extra toothbrush. 0:18:07.800 --> 0:18:11.480 And especially if he's a hope, I would say I 0:18:11.480 --> 0:18:17.480 think the extra tooth the extra toothbrushes for like, okay, I. 0:18:17.600 --> 0:18:20.560 Guess I forget I did. I did too, but I 0:18:21.280 --> 0:18:25.040 mean hot take about the toothbrush thing. So one of 0:18:25.040 --> 0:18:27.800 my friends starts blacking about this dude having a bit 0:18:27.840 --> 0:18:28.840 a lot of toothbrushes. 0:18:29.320 --> 0:18:30.840 I'm like, this just seems so normal to me. I 0:18:30.840 --> 0:18:35.159 know you're upset. She's like, I'm in Missouri. Nobody's visiting 0:18:35.200 --> 0:18:35.520 his name. 0:18:36.119 --> 0:18:38.080 She's like, maybe if you live in New York, LA, 0:18:38.160 --> 0:18:39.520 people come through for the weekend. 0:18:39.800 --> 0:18:41.200 Ain't nobody's visiting anyone else. 0:18:42.200 --> 0:18:45.600 That's what I'm saying that I do believe that people 0:18:45.680 --> 0:18:46.960 visit too. 0:18:47.359 --> 0:18:49.480 Me too. So then I was like, maybe here, any 0:18:49.520 --> 0:18:51.800 big family guy, maybe people do. I love it. I 0:18:51.840 --> 0:18:53.720 love mis Zouri was like, let me let y'all know 0:18:53.880 --> 0:18:56.439 my breath. Do not think. But I'm gonna assume he 0:18:56.520 --> 0:18:57.000 got out of that. 0:18:57.119 --> 0:18:59.720 So I'm not pecking it record for the record dental 0:18:59.760 --> 0:19:04.920 high ortante period. But I'm just you said he got it, Okay, yes, yes, yes, okay, 0:19:04.960 --> 0:19:08.520 So I am bringing Can I bring it off? Change 0:19:08.520 --> 0:19:10.119