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Speaker 1: We've all lied to our parents before. Sometimes you have to. Yeah, like, no, Mom,

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Speaker 1: the chicken wasn't too dry. Yeah, I love the electric

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Speaker 1: nose hair tremmer for my birthday. I'm so glad you

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Speaker 1: gave me that instead of a car.

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Speaker 2: Yeah.

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Speaker 1: I never even wanted to be cool anyway. But some

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Speaker 1: lies are bigger than others. And one of our listeners

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Speaker 1: today needs our help for that exact reason, because she's

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Speaker 1: worried that her brother has been hiding something from her

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Speaker 1: entire family for over two years. It's a big secret,

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Speaker 1: and I can promise you this, it might lead to

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Speaker 1: a huge family blowout if we don't step in right now.

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Speaker 3: Oh, I love family secrets. Let's step in.

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Speaker 1: We're gonna do it. Your awkward Tuesday phone call. Next,

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Speaker 1: it's awkward.

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Speaker 3: It's Tuesday.

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Speaker 1: It's awkward Tuesday phone call. I've told you guys countless

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Speaker 1: times about how awkward it is to hang out with

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Speaker 1: my family. Yeah, hearing about it's one thing. Living it

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Speaker 1: is a different experience because just this past weekend, my

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Speaker 1: father angrily did dishes for a half hour. Why because

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Speaker 1: nobody else was doing them at the time, so he

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Speaker 1: was getting his hands wet cursing while violently shoving plates

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Speaker 1: into the dishwasher, screaming about how he doesn't want to

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Speaker 1: get food poisoning again.

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Speaker 3: All right, checks out.

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Speaker 1: So there just a normal family gathering for the debos,

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Speaker 1: and one of our listeners, Lauren, is having your own

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Speaker 1: issues with an upcoming family get together, apparently regarding her brother, Lauren,

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Speaker 1: do you think maybe your brother wants to hang out

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Speaker 1: and do dishes with my dad because it might actually

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Speaker 1: solve both of our problems? Yeah?

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Speaker 4: I would love that, Okay, I mean, Jeff says that,

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Speaker 4: but you know, he was in the other room being like,

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Speaker 4: I know he's mad, but I really don't want to

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Speaker 4: do him.

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Speaker 2: Yeah, he's like dad came down watching the music.

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Speaker 1: Don't judge me enough about my dad and his dishes. Anger.

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Speaker 1: What about your brother? What's going on with them?

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Speaker 5: Oh?

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Speaker 6: Okay, So it's rather bizarre because my brother has been

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Speaker 6: in a relationship with a girl for about two years now.

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Speaker 3: Okay, so they've been together for a while.

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Speaker 6: Yeah they have, They have two years. Especially for my brother,

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Speaker 6: two years is a while because he's always been a

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Speaker 6: super career oriented focused guy.

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Speaker 3: You know, I thought for sure that was not going

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Speaker 3: to be followed by a compliment, and it was, well, you.

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Speaker 1: Thought he's gonna use a big loser?

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Speaker 3: Yeah, exactly, he's my brother and who'd want to be

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Speaker 3: with him?

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Speaker 1: Okay, sister, Some people are like that though they don't

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Speaker 1: get into a lot of relationships. Yeah, like me.

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Speaker 5: Right, yeah.

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Speaker 6: But the issue was that it's been two years and

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Speaker 6: we've never met her.

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Speaker 3: What oh oh that sketch. That's a long time you've

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Speaker 3: never met her.

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Speaker 6: Well, he's super secretive about her and like he won't

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Speaker 6: tell us or show us photos, like he's showing me

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Speaker 6: a couple of polaroids. Polaroid, I mean polaroids. I know

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Speaker 6: he's he's vintage. What I think you can put him

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Speaker 6: from your phone now?

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Speaker 5: Oh?

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Speaker 3: Yeah?

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Speaker 6: Right?

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Speaker 3: Do they live in another country or something?

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Speaker 5: Is that? What?

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Speaker 3: Like, I just they can't be close to you then, right, we.

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Speaker 6: Don't live super close. No, But whenever the opportunity for

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Speaker 6: us to meet her comes up, all of a sudden,

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Speaker 6: you either busy or sick, or something's come up, and

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Speaker 6: it's you know, it's just getting super weird.

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Speaker 1: What do you think is happening in this situation? Do

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Speaker 1: you think he's just ashamed of you and your family?

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Speaker 3: Oh, I thought it was the girlfriend.

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Speaker 1: That's where I went. That's that's why I didn't introduce anybody.

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Speaker 6: Yeah, I think there's always this pressure from my parents.

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Speaker 6: So when are you going to settle down? You know,

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Speaker 6: when are you going to get married and have a family.

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Speaker 6: And part of me thinks he may have made her

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Speaker 6: up just to get them off his back.

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Speaker 1: Oh she's real.

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Speaker 3: Oh, there's a realty.

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Speaker 5: Oh.

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Speaker 1: I had one of those girlfriends for years and that

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Speaker 1: was kind of nice.

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Speaker 5: Yeah.

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Speaker 1: I'm just someone that you make up just to get

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Speaker 1: your parents off your back.

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Speaker 2: Girl for fifteen years and thousand and third grade.

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Speaker 1: I told you, Sarah's just very shy.

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Speaker 3: Okay, okay, that would be one thing to make it

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Speaker 3: up for your parents because they're putting pressure on you.

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Speaker 3: But he would lie to you as well. You think

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Speaker 3: you're his own sister about a girlfriend.

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Speaker 6: Yeah, I think that's.

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Speaker 1: Where you should be cool.

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Speaker 6: He might be embarrassed, you know, and I just want

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Speaker 6: to let him know that if that's the case, he

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Speaker 6: doesn't have to make someone up like he can be honest.

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Speaker 3: So we're just going to publicly call him out. I

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Speaker 3: like it.

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Speaker 1: Yeah, I am confused. What is it that you want

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Speaker 1: to do with your call here. You want to call

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Speaker 1: your brother and.

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Speaker 6: Say what, I don't know what to say. That's why

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Speaker 6: I'm calling you. Like, the big issue is that I

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Speaker 6: have to do it this way because my parents said

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Speaker 6: that they are going to confront him about it. Yes,

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Speaker 6: I want to get to him and get the answers

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Speaker 6: before they You.

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Speaker 3: Know, it's like a whole family discussion behind his back

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Speaker 3: that everyone thinks his girlfriend's fake.

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Speaker 6: And I would say that.

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Speaker 2: Now after two years, You're like, okay.

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Speaker 3: Yeah, single time every years.

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Speaker 1: It does kind of geta Are you sure you don't

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Speaker 1: want that to happen, just for like the good video

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Speaker 1: that you could post.

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Speaker 6: No, I'm trying to save him before things get really

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Speaker 6: ugly because there could be a huge fallout.

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Speaker 1: I didn't think about that. Maybe she is really ugly.

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Speaker 1: You could be right about that. Is that what she's saying.

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Speaker 1: I thought I heard her say she could be really ugly.

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Speaker 3: No, things could get really ugly and there could be

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Speaker 3: a fallout.

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Speaker 1: Oh okay, but it still is a decent theory, right, Okay,

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Speaker 1: that could be it. We'll find out, We're going to

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Speaker 1: play a song, we'll come back, and we'll give you one.

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Speaker 5: Sorry.

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Speaker 1: Yeah, we're gonna play a song. We'll come back and

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Speaker 1: we'll give you some advice and let you make your

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Speaker 1: awkward Tuesday phone call to your brother to find out

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Speaker 1: if his girlfriend is real or made up. We're gonna

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Speaker 1: do it right after this.

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Speaker 6: All right, thank you?

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Speaker 5: All right?

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Speaker 1: Hold on, it's awkward.

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Speaker 3: It's Tuesday.

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Speaker 1: It's awkward Tuesday phone call. Today. We're on a mission,

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Speaker 1: a mission to track down the invisible girlfriend. Is she real?

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Speaker 1: We don't know. This is what we have. We have

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Speaker 1: no social media posts of the two of them together,

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Speaker 1: no family meetups, and two blurry polaroid photos that have

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Speaker 1: been seen at a brother sister get together, along with

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Speaker 1: a million excuses for why she can't ever meet the fan.

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Speaker 4: Oh my god, maybe she's bigfoot photos.

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Speaker 1: But here's my question. If she's invisible, how do we

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Speaker 1: know she's not on the phone with us right now? Dana,

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Speaker 1: are you here? Blink twice? If you're here, I'm not

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Speaker 1: here hearing the blinks.

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Speaker 5: I prefer that.

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Speaker 1: But no, this is a real situation. We're not joking around.

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Speaker 1: It's been two years and one of our listeners, Lauren,

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Speaker 1: says she has still not met her brother's girlfriend and

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Speaker 1: it's becoming a little bit of an issue in their family,

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Speaker 1: so she's looking to get ahead of this before her

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Speaker 1: parents get involved. What's your advice for Lauren before we

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Speaker 1: call her brother.

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Speaker 4: Listen, the quickest way to bond with your sibling is

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Speaker 4: to have a common enemy, and we all know that

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Speaker 4: enemy is always your parents.

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Speaker 1: I'm right, okay.

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Speaker 4: So listen, you need to go to him and be like,

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Speaker 4: oh my god, you are not going to believe what

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Speaker 4: mom and dad are saying behind your back, and I

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Speaker 4: don't even know how to respond. Under the bus, Yeah, no, yes,

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Speaker 4: throw parents under the bus and.

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Speaker 3: Then hopefully he'll come clean and be honest with you.

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Speaker 1: Lauren, you liking that.

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Speaker 6: I do like that strategy. I do divide and conquered,

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Speaker 6: divide parents.

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Speaker 1: So throw the parents under the bus. That's option one. Jose,

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Speaker 1: what do you think?

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Speaker 2: I really like what you said towards the end of

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Speaker 2: our last phone call, which was you are trying to

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Speaker 2: save him, so so he knows like, Hey, I'm not

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Speaker 2: just being a boss the older sister here. I'm truly

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Speaker 2: trying to help, and I think that he'll matter.

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Speaker 3: Really, you don't care if he doesn't have a girlfriend, right, regardless.

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Speaker 1: Right, you're the hero here. In fact, call yourself a

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Speaker 1: hero when you talk to me. You're gonna save his

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Speaker 1: relationship with mom and dad. Are you ready to do this?

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Speaker 6: That's all I want for Christmas.

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Speaker 1: Okay, that's sweet. Here we go, family war, family division.

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Speaker 1: All right, I'm gonna dial your brother's phone number. We're

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Speaker 1: going to back away and let you talk to him,

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Speaker 1: but we'll jump in when we feel like you need

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Speaker 1: a little help.

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Speaker 6: Okay, okay, sounds good.

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Speaker 1: All right, here we go.

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Speaker 5: Hello, Hello, Jake, Lauren.

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Speaker 6: Yes, how are you?

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Speaker 5: I'm good. I didn't know what you call in. Your

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Speaker 5: name didn't pop up.

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Speaker 6: Oh, I'm sorry about that. You know, sometimes gotta make

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Speaker 6: it a surprise, right, got switch things up?

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Speaker 5: Yeah? What do you mean?

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Speaker 6: Well, I don't know.

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Speaker 5: Listen, listen.

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Speaker 6: So the holidays are right around the.

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Speaker 7: Corner, right, yeah, yeah, Mom and dad are really excited

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Speaker 7: to get together as always, and they keep after me

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Speaker 7: if we're gonna get to me Kana.

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Speaker 5: Uh, Well, I don't know. I mean, she's got a

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Speaker 5: lot on our plate right now. So I'm I'm not

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Speaker 5: sure if you'll have time.

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Speaker 6: I mean, maybe you're joking, right, What do you mean

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Speaker 6: he's not gonna have time. It's yeah, it's been over

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Speaker 6: two years now, Jake, we haven't met her.

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Speaker 5: Well yeah, I mean, I'm sorry, but timing's been off.

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Speaker 5: Just hasn't been the right time.

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Speaker 6: I mean, Jake, timing's always been off. It's just is

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Speaker 6: there something else going on?

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Speaker 5: I don't know what to tell you. I mean, she's

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Speaker 5: just not ready, is it?

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Speaker 3: Dad?

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Speaker 6: Cream cheese and rantam because trust to me, I get it.

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Speaker 5: No, there's nothing to do with that. Okay.

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Speaker 6: Well, I'm your big sister, and mom and dad have

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Speaker 6: been talking about this to me and I hate that.

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Speaker 6: It's not good.

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Speaker 5: Well, so what I mean, it's not their business. I

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Speaker 5: mean they can talk about it, it's not to me.

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Speaker 6: They think you're hiding something, Jake. And to be honest

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Speaker 6: at this point, I kind of do too. Oh come on, Jake,

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Speaker 6: just be honest. Okay, that she exists?

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Speaker 5: Is she real?

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Speaker 6: Is they not a real person? Because it's okay if

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Speaker 6: she's not, like I guess the pressure I was there

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Speaker 6: too before. I'm at Cooper.

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Speaker 5: Listen, she's real. I've already told you that. And honestly,

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Speaker 5: that's crazy that you think I'm lying about it. It's

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Speaker 5: kind of why what am.

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Speaker 6: I supposed to think? What am I supposed to think?

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Speaker 6: There's no social media posts. I come over to your

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Speaker 6: house and there's a few blurry polaroids.

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Speaker 5: You know.

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Speaker 6: It's it's just it's it's weird.

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Speaker 5: Look, I mean, I get it, but I can't do

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Speaker 5: anything about it. She's not ready. We're not ready. It's

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Speaker 5: just not the time.

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Speaker 6: What do you mean, We're not ready? Not ready for what?

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Speaker 6: It's been two years?

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Speaker 5: Fine, we're not ready because Dana is her real name?

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Speaker 6: What are you talking about.

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Speaker 5: The real name is Claire and you know her.

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Speaker 6: What are you talking about right now? I don't I

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Speaker 6: don't understand.

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Speaker 5: It's it's our stepsister. Okay? What that?

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Speaker 1: Oh my god?

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Speaker 3: Jake?

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Speaker 1: Hey what hey man? You're need a second over here?

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Speaker 6: My name is jeffreaking out.

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Speaker 5: Oh my god, Jake.

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Speaker 1: You're on a radio show right now. What don't worry.

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Speaker 1: Not a lot of people listen to us, just a

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Speaker 1: few million. But it is interesting to hear this. We

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Speaker 1: we know a lot about some of your story from

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Speaker 1: your sister.

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Speaker 6: Are you serious? It's Claire?

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Speaker 1: Okay? Please tell me.

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Speaker 4: It's like an adult stepsister, like you didn't grow up together?

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Speaker 3: Did you grow up together?

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Speaker 5: Yeah, we were like thirteen.

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Speaker 1: Okay, you're basically adults teenagers. Yeah, well, in the Jewish tradition,

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Speaker 1: thirteen is adults. And I don't know what your religion is,

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Speaker 1: but since you celebrate Christmas, it's probably not your stepsister, Lauren.

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Speaker 5: Lauren, I knew you'd react like this. This is why

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Speaker 5: I don't tell you guys stuff. I mean, everyone is dutchmental.

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Speaker 1: This really does make a lot of sense.

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Speaker 6: That's not normal, Jake, that's not normal.

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Speaker 5: Why not? It's not like we're blood related. It's fine.

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Speaker 6: Happened?

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Speaker 3: Did this happen at at like another family holiday event?

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Speaker 5: Like?

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Speaker 7: Do you know what I'm saying?

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Speaker 1: Brook wants to take notes so she can make it

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Speaker 1: happen for the organize it.

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Speaker 5: It happened way after our teenage years. I never thought

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Speaker 5: this would happen. I just I don't know. We ended

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Speaker 5: up hanging out and the notes and started falling for

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Speaker 5: each other. I like her. I don't know. I don't

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Speaker 5: care that point.

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Speaker 1: So wait, when we're.

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Speaker 3: Talking about your mom and dad, is it your mom

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Speaker 3: and stepdad that we're talking like? Oh my, there's like

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Speaker 3: a lot of family dynamics here.

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Speaker 2: Yeah, we can have at least acknowledge there's no blood relation.

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Speaker 6: Yeah, with her in high school. I lived with her

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Speaker 6: in high school. You can't hate her.

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Speaker 1: Well, it's great, so that way, you've already met That

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Speaker 1: was what the whole problem was. He said that you

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Speaker 1: never met her so you know her.

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Speaker 5: Well, yeah, you should be happy because you have already

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Speaker 5: met her and she's great.

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Speaker 3: Isn't she already at your family holiday stuff? You guys

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Speaker 3: just aren't acting like a couple.

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Speaker 5: During it, Like, what is exactly? I mean, that's why

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Speaker 5: I haven't made a big announce that she's already there.

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Speaker 6: So what do you do?

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Speaker 2: You have to wait until you guys get engaged to

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Speaker 2: tell us break up?

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Speaker 1: What exactly was the plan here, Jake? Like when were

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Speaker 1: you going to come forward and say what your relationship was?

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Speaker 5: I mean, this is the issue. I mean I get it,

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Speaker 5: Like I know that it's maybe not the most normal thing,

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Speaker 5: you know, to be attracted to your stepsister, but I

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Speaker 5: just know I can't. I can't ignore my feelings with me,

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Speaker 5: can she?

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Speaker 6: I Mean?

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Speaker 1: Look, we are a show that's all about love, right Brooke.

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Speaker 1: Love is love and you have to.

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Speaker 4: Support this it But like the shock and if you

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Speaker 4: were going to pull the band aid off. It would

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Speaker 4: have helped, like two years ago. Now you have created

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Speaker 4: all of this for two years.

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Speaker 2: They're going to be upset that he didn't say anything before.

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Speaker 3: And they're both they're both in the same room while

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Speaker 3: people are asking him about girlfriends.

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Speaker 1: Okay, be honest, you guys.

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Speaker 2: Ever sneak away though, And I don't know.

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Speaker 1: I imagine it's like, oh, I know all those family

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Speaker 1: vacations against are.

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Speaker 5: Oh, so now you guys get it right, Like why

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Speaker 5: I have not totally?

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Speaker 1: Yeah, Oh, I can kind of understand why that would

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Speaker 1: be difficult to tell mom and dad text I would

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Speaker 1: have deleted it.

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Speaker 6: Yeah, I never thought I would say this, But maybe

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Speaker 6: it's better not to tell mom and dad. And I'm

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Speaker 6: going to cross my fingers and hope you break up

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Speaker 6: by that.

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Speaker 3: I feel like she'll tell them for you.

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Speaker 1: It's not going to be horrible. Then if you don't

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Speaker 1: tell him, then we can maybe even do closure call

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Speaker 1: coming up or a second date update in the future

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Speaker 1: like parents, No with Jake and his stepsister. Oh, it's

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Speaker 1: the content that keeps on giving. That's what the segment

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Speaker 1: is all about.

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Speaker 2: Why don't we just do a phone tap on the

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Speaker 2: parents and see how they react and at.

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Speaker 1: The end we can go. It's a new recurring segment

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Speaker 1: that we need.

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Speaker 3: I like it. Yeah, Brooke and Jeffrey in the Morning