WEBVTT - Living In Denial 0:00:01.880 --> 0:00:04.439 Hey, this is Stephen Ferdick. I'm the pastor of Elevation 0:00:04.720 --> 0:00:06.960 Church and this is our podcast. I wanted to thank 0:00:06.960 --> 0:00:10.280 you for joining us today. Hope this inspires you. Hope 0:00:10.280 --> 0:00:12.360 it builds your faith. Hope it gives your perspective to 0:00:12.360 --> 0:00:15.160 see God is moving in your life. Enjoy the message. 0:00:17.120 --> 0:00:19.599 A lot of times when I'm up here, I'm welcoming 0:00:20.120 --> 0:00:21.919 the guest who's going to preach, But today, I guess 0:00:21.920 --> 0:00:25.720 I'm welcoming myself because I had the incredible honor of 0:00:25.840 --> 0:00:29.080 being able to preach and bring God's word to you today. 0:00:29.120 --> 0:00:32.240 I'm so grateful that Pastor Stephen would trust me to preach. 0:00:32.280 --> 0:00:34.559 And I'm really excited about this word because God has 0:00:34.600 --> 0:00:37.360 been working it in my heart over the last several weeks. 0:00:37.360 --> 0:00:39.320 He's been preaching it to me so that I can 0:00:39.400 --> 0:00:41.600 have something to bring to y'all. I'm going to stay 0:00:41.600 --> 0:00:43.880 in the flow of our Savage Jesus series. Haven't you 0:00:43.920 --> 0:00:47.960 loved Savage Jesus? In case you're new, We've been looking 0:00:48.040 --> 0:00:50.560 at the life of Jesus through the Book of Mark, 0:00:50.600 --> 0:00:52.360 and I think one of the reasons this series is 0:00:52.400 --> 0:00:55.280 resonating so powerfully with me and with our churches is 0:00:55.320 --> 0:00:59.000 really just an overflow of our pastor's heart. Because I've 0:00:59.000 --> 0:01:01.360 been here for eleven year and I can say in 0:01:01.520 --> 0:01:04.759 every single season, he has always fought to keep our 0:01:04.800 --> 0:01:07.080 focus as a church on the main thing, which will 0:01:07.080 --> 0:01:10.520 always and forever be Jesus. And it's not just what 0:01:10.600 --> 0:01:14.600 he preaches on the platform. It's in the decisions he 0:01:14.720 --> 0:01:17.319 makes behind the scenes. It's in the way that he's 0:01:17.400 --> 0:01:20.160 kind of savage, and how he loves and encourages and 0:01:20.200 --> 0:01:22.880 blesses people that you'll never hear about in a sermon. 0:01:22.959 --> 0:01:24.720 So I just want to thank God for a pastor 0:01:24.760 --> 0:01:28.800 he keeps as centered on the heart of God, which 0:01:28.840 --> 0:01:32.319 is to reach people with the Gospel of Jesus Christ. 0:01:33.680 --> 0:01:35.880 And I'm so excited about what God's going to do today. 0:01:35.880 --> 0:01:41.360 You guys can have a seat now. This is a 0:01:41.400 --> 0:01:44.399 significant weekend for me, not just because I get the 0:01:44.440 --> 0:01:47.760 honor of preaching, but anyone who knows me knows that 0:01:47.800 --> 0:01:50.440 I'm pretty excited that there's a new Star Wars movie 0:01:50.440 --> 0:01:55.160 out this weekend. If you're watching this later, Solo came 0:01:55.200 --> 0:01:58.360 out this weekend, and I am just a full fledged, 0:01:58.640 --> 0:02:01.680 unashamed geek. I love anything that has to do with 0:02:01.840 --> 0:02:04.160 a long time ago in a galaxy far far away. 0:02:04.720 --> 0:02:06.920 And it's not just me, I've converted my kids. So 0:02:06.960 --> 0:02:09.000 this is you can see our favorite like post dinner 0:02:09.480 --> 0:02:11.840 lightsaber fight. That's kind of what we do to bond 0:02:12.160 --> 0:02:14.480 as a family. But you know, my kids even have 0:02:14.520 --> 0:02:17.080 a Star Wars YouTube channel called the Three Pos. I 0:02:17.160 --> 0:02:19.680 was pretty impressed with that name. Three Kids, three Pos. 0:02:19.800 --> 0:02:22.680 My wife came up with it. But I'm also a 0:02:22.720 --> 0:02:24.640 forty two year old man who may or may not 0:02:24.720 --> 0:02:27.720 collect Star Wars comics. But that's that's okay. But I'm 0:02:27.800 --> 0:02:30.920 just I'm just a casual collector. I don't hold a 0:02:30.960 --> 0:02:34.200 candle compared to some serious collectors out there. And my 0:02:34.280 --> 0:02:37.320 friend who's on staff, Ryan Monette, he is a legit 0:02:37.720 --> 0:02:40.680 Star Wars, just anything sci fi collector. You go to 0:02:40.720 --> 0:02:43.000 his house and you feel like you're walking into a 0:02:43.120 --> 0:02:47.440 sci fi museum. You got life sized, real costumes and replicas. 0:02:47.440 --> 0:02:49.600 And let me show you how much better he is 0:02:49.600 --> 0:02:53.080 as a collector than me. So this is the prize 0:02:53.080 --> 0:02:55.000 of my collection. This was my R two D two 0:02:55.080 --> 0:02:59.240 when I was five years old and I still have it. Actually, 0:02:59.240 --> 0:03:01.359 one night it just randomly turned on in my room 0:03:01.400 --> 0:03:03.320 as a kid and just felt that it freaked me out, 0:03:03.360 --> 0:03:06.000 but still still kept it. But I love this thing. 0:03:06.080 --> 0:03:09.040 This is this is like the pinnacle of my collection. 0:03:09.800 --> 0:03:12.600 Let me show you the highlight of Ryan's collection. I 0:03:12.600 --> 0:03:19.880 want to introduce that to you really quick. In case 0:03:19.919 --> 0:03:24.600 you missed this, RTD two is on the stage at Valentine. 0:03:24.720 --> 0:03:29.079 I'm living out every childhood dream. My eight year old 0:03:29.120 --> 0:03:32.680 self would be going nuts right now. It took Ryan 0:03:33.560 --> 0:03:36.600 four years to build this. First of all, I've never 0:03:36.640 --> 0:03:39.280 realized R two is this big. I feel even kind 0:03:39.280 --> 0:03:44.240 of short scented next to him. But my thanks, artwo. 0:03:45.680 --> 0:03:47.560 It took him four years to build this because you 0:03:47.560 --> 0:03:49.360 had to get parts from certain parts of the country 0:03:49.360 --> 0:03:51.120 and they're only available at certain times of the year. 0:03:51.160 --> 0:03:53.760 There's this whole R two builders club. And how many 0:03:53.800 --> 0:03:55.760 of you think that the best way Ryan could honor 0:03:55.760 --> 0:03:57.560 his worship pastor after preaching all week and would be 0:03:57.640 --> 0:04:00.000 to let me take this home if you want to say, 0:04:00.120 --> 0:04:04.920 start a petition. So R two, is there anything you'd 0:04:04.920 --> 0:04:09.880 like to say to the people? Oh? Really, what was 0:04:09.920 --> 0:04:12.760 your favorite sermon ins What was your favorite sermon in 0:04:12.760 --> 0:04:18.040 savage Jesus? Oh this is significant. I like that one too. 0:04:17.960 --> 0:04:23.800 Would you like to preach today instead of me? That's 0:04:23.800 --> 0:04:25.680 how I feel too, buddy. All right, you need to 0:04:25.720 --> 0:04:28.120 go because I'll play with R two the whole time. 0:04:28.160 --> 0:04:29.919 I won't preach, So go that way, give it up 0:04:29.960 --> 0:04:37.240 for our two. So that is what a true collector 0:04:37.960 --> 0:04:40.880 will build. And you know, sometimes collections get out of hand, 0:04:40.920 --> 0:04:42.520 and maybe some of you think four years to build 0:04:42.560 --> 0:04:44.239 that is out of hand. I don't I fully endorse 0:04:44.320 --> 0:04:48.080 that and support that. But if you've ever seen Hoarders, 0:04:48.640 --> 0:04:50.080 you know what I have you ever seen that show? 0:04:51.000 --> 0:04:54.120 There's some ridiculous, like gross stuff on that show. But 0:04:54.760 --> 0:04:57.080 what you can see sometimes is that someone starts out 0:04:57.120 --> 0:04:59.760 with an innocent collection, maybe a doll collection that's something 0:04:59.800 --> 0:05:02.080 good that you love, or a book collection. And I've 0:05:02.120 --> 0:05:04.400 seen the show where this woman was trapped in her 0:05:04.440 --> 0:05:07.600 house by the fifty thousand dolls that she collected, this 0:05:07.680 --> 0:05:10.640 tiny house surrounded by dolls, couldn't even move, couldn't function. 0:05:11.040 --> 0:05:13.640 Or this one man who had five hundred thousand books, 0:05:14.160 --> 0:05:16.600 and they're overwhelmed by their collection and they can't even 0:05:16.680 --> 0:05:19.839 live their life anymore. And the crazy thing is they're 0:05:19.839 --> 0:05:22.320 living in denial. They don't even see that they have 0:05:22.360 --> 0:05:24.960 a problem. It takes somebody else to come and show 0:05:25.000 --> 0:05:28.919 them that this collection isn't helping you anymore, it's hurting you. 0:05:29.000 --> 0:05:33.240 So collections can get out of hand. And Jesus in 0:05:33.360 --> 0:05:36.400 Mark Eate talks about a collection that can get out 0:05:36.400 --> 0:05:38.520 of hand and maybe something more important that we should 0:05:38.560 --> 0:05:41.080 collect instead. So this is our passage that we're going 0:05:41.120 --> 0:05:43.880 to focus on today. It's in Mark chapter eight, verses 0:05:43.920 --> 0:05:47.280 thirty four through thirty seven. So let's look at this now. 0:05:47.279 --> 0:05:50.120 It says, then he called the crowd to him, along 0:05:50.160 --> 0:05:53.000 with his disciples, and said, whoever wants to be my 0:05:53.080 --> 0:05:56.880 disciple must deny themselves and take up their cross and 0:05:56.960 --> 0:05:59.640 follow me. For whoever wants to save their life will 0:05:59.640 --> 0:06:02.080 lose it. But whoever loses their life for me and 0:06:02.120 --> 0:06:04.560 for the Gospel will save it. What good is it 0:06:04.560 --> 0:06:07.160 for someone to gain the whole world yet forfeit their soul, 0:06:07.640 --> 0:06:10.800 Or what can anyone give in exchange for their soul? 0:06:11.279 --> 0:06:13.000 So I want to talk to you today about living 0:06:13.400 --> 0:06:17.280 in denial. Living in denial. Turn to your neighbor and 0:06:17.320 --> 0:06:22.000 ask them, are you in denial? So here we have 0:06:22.080 --> 0:06:25.239 Jesus talking. I'd be real curious to know. They answered 0:06:25.240 --> 0:06:28.679 to some of that. Here we have Jesus talking about 0:06:29.040 --> 0:06:32.880 a collection gaining the whole world, and it's meaningless you 0:06:32.960 --> 0:06:36.440 lose your soul and instead taking up something far more valuable, 0:06:36.800 --> 0:06:41.279 which is collecting, taking up across. And so for me, 0:06:41.960 --> 0:06:44.320 I grew up in church. My granddad was a pastor, 0:06:44.440 --> 0:06:47.039 my dad was the music minister, my mom played the organ. 0:06:47.120 --> 0:06:50.120 My aunt and uncle they worked with the youth. So 0:06:50.320 --> 0:06:53.159 I was always around these nice little Christian cliches. I 0:06:53.160 --> 0:06:55.599 heard all these things in youth group and sermon, and 0:06:55.640 --> 0:06:58.400 they would sound great on a bumper sticker, like deny yourself, 0:06:58.440 --> 0:07:04.160 take up your cross, and sounds cute. Right. Can we 0:07:04.320 --> 0:07:07.960 just admit that no one lives like that? No? I 0:07:08.000 --> 0:07:10.640 mean maybe you do, maybe you're way more holy than 0:07:10.680 --> 0:07:14.000 I am. But I'm trying to imagine how the disciples 0:07:14.080 --> 0:07:17.240 must have felt when they heard Jesus say take up 0:07:17.240 --> 0:07:19.680 your cross, because for them, across was not something you 0:07:19.720 --> 0:07:23.920 wore on a necklace. Across was where someone was brutally 0:07:24.000 --> 0:07:28.280 murdered and executed. And the disciples had to be freaking 0:07:28.280 --> 0:07:31.160 out because, honestly, for them, up until this point, things 0:07:31.160 --> 0:07:33.840 have been pretty good. In Galilee. I mean, the crowds 0:07:33.840 --> 0:07:36.360 were growing, they were seeing miracles. Yeah, there was a 0:07:36.360 --> 0:07:38.760 little controversy here and there, but all of a sudden, 0:07:38.840 --> 0:07:42.440 Jesus is talking about taking up across and dying, and 0:07:42.440 --> 0:07:44.520 not just him taking up across, telling them to take 0:07:44.600 --> 0:07:47.080 up across. And so I'm imagining them kind of murmuring 0:07:47.120 --> 0:07:48.680 to each other like wait a second, or we do 0:07:48.720 --> 0:07:51.320 we have to die too. It wasn't what they wanted 0:07:51.680 --> 0:07:55.840 to hear. And what they wouldn't realize until much later 0:07:56.040 --> 0:08:00.680 is that Mark eight. This is the point where everything changes, because, 0:08:00.720 --> 0:08:02.400 like I said, up until that point, they'd have been 0:08:02.440 --> 0:08:07.280 in Galilee doing ministry there, doing miracles, feeding the five thousand, 0:08:07.880 --> 0:08:11.480 and this is the point where Jesus turns and faces Jerusalem, 0:08:11.800 --> 0:08:13.200 and the rest of the Book of Mark is the 0:08:13.280 --> 0:08:15.480 last week of his life in Jerusalem as he goes 0:08:15.760 --> 0:08:20.160 to take up his cross. And so, like I said, 0:08:20.320 --> 0:08:23.800 when I was younger, that sounded nice, deny yourself, take 0:08:23.840 --> 0:08:25.280 up your cross, follow me, And I thought, you know, 0:08:25.320 --> 0:08:29.080 I've got this whole denying someend thing down, Like I 0:08:29.120 --> 0:08:32.000 feel pretty good. I'm in church every time the doors 0:08:32.000 --> 0:08:33.560 are open, but I kind of have to be because 0:08:33.600 --> 0:08:36.000 my granddad's the pastor and my parents work there, but 0:08:36.400 --> 0:08:39.120 that's cool, that should work in my favor. And yeah, 0:08:39.160 --> 0:08:41.280 I watch MTV every now and then, even though my 0:08:41.320 --> 0:08:43.160 parents tell me not to when they're out of the room. 0:08:43.200 --> 0:08:45.240 And if I'm getting really crazy, I'll watch the Simpsons. 0:08:45.280 --> 0:08:49.959 But you know, that's that's okay. And maybe I think 0:08:49.960 --> 0:08:52.760 about Kelly Kapowski a little too much after watching Say 0:08:52.800 --> 0:08:54.280 By the Bell. But I've repented of all this at 0:08:54.320 --> 0:08:59.040 youth camp, so I'm good. I'm good. But then I 0:08:59.040 --> 0:09:03.480 got older and I started to be confronted with the 0:09:03.520 --> 0:09:06.440 depth of my sin, and I started to realize that 0:09:06.440 --> 0:09:09.040 there was a lot of jealousy in my heart when 0:09:09.240 --> 0:09:13.040 someone got something that I thought I deserved. And I 0:09:13.080 --> 0:09:17.160 realized I was pretty selfish in my relationships and I 0:09:17.200 --> 0:09:21.040 wasn't ever really content. I always wanted more. And I 0:09:21.080 --> 0:09:23.679 began to feel really discouraged and defeated because I was like, well, 0:09:23.720 --> 0:09:25.959 I gave my life to Christ. I said, I was 0:09:26.000 --> 0:09:28.760 going to commit my life to following Jesus. But how 0:09:28.760 --> 0:09:31.440 do I deny the sin because it's always right there 0:09:31.440 --> 0:09:33.520 before me? And I feel defeated all the time, like 0:09:33.559 --> 0:09:35.520 I could never live for God because I don't know 0:09:35.600 --> 0:09:39.000 how to deny my sin, and maybe you feel the 0:09:39.040 --> 0:09:42.160 same way. Maybe right now you just hear the voice 0:09:42.440 --> 0:09:47.160 of accusation all around you, saying you're a liar, you're 0:09:47.160 --> 0:09:52.440 an addict, you're an adulter, you're a cheat, you're insecure. 0:09:52.559 --> 0:09:55.200 You're hearing just the voice of your sin right in 0:09:55.200 --> 0:09:57.679 front of you, and you feel like it's impossible to 0:09:57.720 --> 0:09:59.920 deny your sin, and you don't know what it means 0:10:00.080 --> 0:10:05.079 to live for Christ. With that being the case, God 0:10:05.120 --> 0:10:08.520 showed me something in this passage this week that has 0:10:08.559 --> 0:10:11.640 helped me so much. And I've been praying all week 0:10:12.000 --> 0:10:14.640 that would help you in the same way. Because I've 0:10:14.679 --> 0:10:17.959 read this passage for years, for my whole life, I've 0:10:18.000 --> 0:10:20.920 read it wrong. I've never noticed this until this week, 0:10:20.920 --> 0:10:23.000 and I want us to look at it again. Let's 0:10:23.040 --> 0:10:26.120 read it one more time. Then he called the crowd 0:10:26.160 --> 0:10:29.080 to him along with his disciples, and said, whoever wants 0:10:29.120 --> 0:10:32.160 to be my disciple must deny themselves and take up 0:10:32.160 --> 0:10:35.760 their cross and follow me. Whoever wants to save their 0:10:35.800 --> 0:10:38.240 life will lose it. But whoever loses their life from 0:10:38.280 --> 0:10:41.120 me and for the Gospel will save it. What good 0:10:41.160 --> 0:10:43.360 is it for someone to gain the whole world yet 0:10:43.440 --> 0:10:47.319 forfeit their soul, or what can anyone gain in exchange 0:10:47.320 --> 0:10:52.120 for their soul? Did you notice what's missing in that 0:10:52.160 --> 0:10:57.640 passage The word sin. The word sin is nowhere in 0:10:57.679 --> 0:11:01.360 that passage because Jesus wasn't talking about sin this whole time. 0:11:01.360 --> 0:11:04.200 I thought it was about denying my sin. Jesus never 0:11:04.240 --> 0:11:10.800 said deny your sin. He said deny yourself. But what 0:11:10.880 --> 0:11:13.480 about my sin? I mean, that's still a pretty big deal. 0:11:13.559 --> 0:11:15.840 Yet it is a big deal, And that's the whole reason. Jesus, 0:11:15.880 --> 0:11:18.360 when he said this, was about to head to Jerusalem 0:11:18.720 --> 0:11:20.640 to deal with your sin once and for all on 0:11:20.760 --> 0:11:23.719 his cross, on his cross. He was going to deal 0:11:23.720 --> 0:11:25.959 with your sin on his cross. He was going to 0:11:26.000 --> 0:11:28.200 deal with your shame on his cross. He was going 0:11:28.280 --> 0:11:31.360 to deal with your condemnation once and for all. We 0:11:31.440 --> 0:11:36.240 receive his grace because of his cross. But the thing 0:11:36.320 --> 0:11:38.320 that has just been blowing my mind all week is 0:11:38.360 --> 0:11:41.640 that Jesus never told us to take up his cross. 0:11:42.480 --> 0:11:47.800 He said take up yours. You can't take up his cross. 0:11:48.600 --> 0:11:51.120 It's too big of a weight to bear. And the 0:11:51.120 --> 0:11:53.280 good news is you don't have to. He took up 0:11:53.320 --> 0:11:56.640 his cross, dealt with your sin once and for all 0:11:56.760 --> 0:11:59.280 it is finished. You do not have to atone for 0:11:59.360 --> 0:12:04.280 your sin. You do not have to make yourself righteous. 0:12:04.320 --> 0:12:08.520 He made you righteous on his cross, and you can't 0:12:08.559 --> 0:12:11.640 deal with your sin on your cross. Your cross has 0:12:11.720 --> 0:12:16.079 nothing to do with sin. We deal with self on 0:12:16.120 --> 0:12:21.520 our cross. And if our cross has nothing to do 0:12:21.600 --> 0:12:25.000 with sin, maybe it means that there are some things 0:12:25.000 --> 0:12:28.760 that we've never thought of as sin, maybe even some 0:12:28.840 --> 0:12:33.320 good things that we're holding on to that God wants 0:12:33.400 --> 0:12:36.800 us to let go of, that God wants us to 0:12:36.880 --> 0:12:39.800 deny in order to follow him. Because this, I believe 0:12:39.840 --> 0:12:41.920 is the word of the Lord for our church this week. 0:12:41.960 --> 0:12:45.839 And if you're a follower of Christ, your sin has 0:12:45.880 --> 0:12:48.000 been made right because of the cross of Jesus Christ. 0:12:48.080 --> 0:12:51.600 But your refusal to deny yourself will cause you to 0:12:51.640 --> 0:12:54.640 miss out on the power of God in your life. 0:12:54.840 --> 0:12:59.080 We cannot experience the fullness of life in Jesus Christ 0:12:59.240 --> 0:13:02.920 if we do not deny ourself. And His cross was 0:13:03.000 --> 0:13:06.040 done once and for all, but we take up our 0:13:06.080 --> 0:13:10.560 cross daily, every single day. We have to learn what 0:13:10.600 --> 0:13:12.880 it means to take up our cross and deny ourselves. 0:13:12.880 --> 0:13:14.880 In fact, in the Book of Luke, when Luke is 0:13:14.920 --> 0:13:17.920 talking about this same passage. He says, you have to 0:13:17.920 --> 0:13:21.840 take up your cross daily. This is a daily dying 0:13:21.960 --> 0:13:24.040 to self. And I've been asking myself all week, and 0:13:24.120 --> 0:13:26.440 God has been showing me that there are some good 0:13:26.440 --> 0:13:29.520 things that I need to let go of, and maybe 0:13:29.600 --> 0:13:31.800 there's some good things that you need to let go 0:13:31.840 --> 0:13:33.800 of as well, in order to embrace the power of 0:13:33.840 --> 0:13:38.520 God and your life. I know some of you are thinking, well, okay, 0:13:38.520 --> 0:13:40.840 so I have to feel bad about my sin, and 0:13:40.920 --> 0:13:42.680 now I have to feel bad about the good things too. 0:13:43.679 --> 0:13:46.600 That's not the point at all. But Jesus is saying 0:13:47.000 --> 0:13:49.160 that when you take up your cross, you're taking up 0:13:49.480 --> 0:13:52.080 his way of life and his way of life. He 0:13:52.160 --> 0:13:57.120 promises peace, he promises joy, he promises fulfillment, but it 0:13:57.160 --> 0:14:01.920 does require letting go. So a couple weeks ago, I 0:14:01.920 --> 0:14:04.000 have my little Saturday routine with my kids before I 0:14:04.040 --> 0:14:08.440 get ready for church, and Ferris, my wife, she took Sydney, 0:14:08.480 --> 0:14:11.360 our youngest daughter, to dance class, and so I was upstairs. 0:14:11.360 --> 0:14:14.160 I have twin girls that are nine, and I was 0:14:14.240 --> 0:14:16.760 upstairs and I was playing video games with them, which 0:14:16.760 --> 0:14:18.960 is what any good dad would do when alone with 0:14:19.000 --> 0:14:22.720 the kids. And so I'm playing video games, and I 0:14:22.720 --> 0:14:24.520 feel guilty. After a while, I'm like, well, we need 0:14:24.560 --> 0:14:26.520 to go downstairs and go outside. It's a nice day 0:14:26.560 --> 0:14:28.960 and do something productive. And so I'm about to go 0:14:29.000 --> 0:14:31.080 down the stairs. And here's one thing you need to 0:14:31.080 --> 0:14:35.840 know about me. I am addicted to soda. I love if, PEPSI, coke, 0:14:35.920 --> 0:14:39.600 whatever it is. I love it a little bit too much. 0:14:39.800 --> 0:14:42.840 So like none ten soda is a day. I know 0:14:42.920 --> 0:14:51.280 it's it's bad, don't judge me. But this is my 0:14:51.400 --> 0:14:53.760 healthy option. This is ZeVA and so this is what 0:14:53.840 --> 0:14:55.640 makes me feel a little bit better about drinking all that. 0:14:56.400 --> 0:14:58.320 And so I always have one of these in my hand. 0:14:58.400 --> 0:15:01.640 And so we have this long flight of wooden stairs 0:15:01.720 --> 0:15:05.400 at our house. Zv is in my hand and I 0:15:05.480 --> 0:15:08.920 get three stairs from the top. My feet slip out 0:15:08.920 --> 0:15:12.160 from under me. It's like time stands still in this moment. 0:15:12.200 --> 0:15:14.280 And the first thought, I kid you not. The first 0:15:14.280 --> 0:15:16.440 thing I think of is oh no, I don't want 0:15:16.440 --> 0:15:22.240 to spill my ZBA. First thought, second thought is wow, 0:15:22.400 --> 0:15:25.720 that stair hurts my head really really bad. My head 0:15:25.760 --> 0:15:28.040 slams against the stairs, my back slams, and then I 0:15:28.120 --> 0:15:31.160 hit every single stair on the way down. I mean, 0:15:31.240 --> 0:15:33.240 think of the worst scene in a movie you've ever 0:15:33.280 --> 0:15:35.560 seen of someone falling down the stairs. I can't even 0:15:35.640 --> 0:15:38.440 get words out. It hurts so much. It's just like 0:15:39.840 --> 0:15:43.480 it's the sound I made in my mind. I'm thinking, 0:15:43.520 --> 0:15:45.320 this is how I am. This is the worst way 0:15:45.360 --> 0:15:48.880 to go, most embarrassing way to go. I slam on 0:15:48.920 --> 0:15:52.440 the bottom of the floor in the fetal position, and 0:15:52.520 --> 0:15:54.840 I hear adleon Leonna just come to the top of 0:15:54.840 --> 0:15:56.720 the stairs in the rail and they just look down, 0:15:56.760 --> 0:15:59.680 and I kind of like compare about them, like, Daddy, 0:15:59.720 --> 0:16:02.960 are you okay? Once again, I can't like vocalize words. 0:16:02.960 --> 0:16:07.480 I'm just like, ah, you would think my beloved daughters, 0:16:08.120 --> 0:16:12.280 who love me, who are compassionate, who are kind, would 0:16:12.280 --> 0:16:15.040 come and run to the aid of their loving father. 0:16:16.120 --> 0:16:19.240 That is not what happened. They were so scared and 0:16:19.280 --> 0:16:21.600 thought that I was dying that instead of coming to 0:16:21.600 --> 0:16:23.840 help me, they ran to their room, screamed and slammed 0:16:23.840 --> 0:16:26.320 the door and just left me there all by myself 0:16:27.680 --> 0:16:31.560 for like five minutes. I'm there all by myself, and 0:16:31.600 --> 0:16:35.040 then once I can finally move, and then I start 0:16:35.080 --> 0:16:37.040 getting mad at them for running away, forgetting that I'm 0:16:37.080 --> 0:16:38.840 the dad that they're not supposed to take care of me. 0:16:39.400 --> 0:16:41.640 They come down the stairs to check on me, and 0:16:41.680 --> 0:16:43.520 I'm just like, well, just clean up the zvia, And 0:16:43.560 --> 0:16:45.120 so they clean up the zva and then we have 0:16:45.160 --> 0:16:47.040 a nice chat about what to do if mommy or 0:16:47.080 --> 0:16:54.440 daddy actually was hurt. But here's what I realized after 0:16:54.480 --> 0:16:58.000 the fact. If I just let go of the zvia 0:16:58.280 --> 0:17:03.920 and grabbed the handrail, I could have just saved myself 0:17:04.520 --> 0:17:10.960 a lot of pain, a lot of embarrassment right now. 0:17:11.240 --> 0:17:13.480 And I was driving later that day and I was wondering, 0:17:14.840 --> 0:17:17.719 are there any things in my life that I'm holding 0:17:17.720 --> 0:17:21.000 onto that are going to hurt me if I don't 0:17:21.080 --> 0:17:31.400 let go? And in your life, are there any things 0:17:31.440 --> 0:17:34.600 that you're holding onto any zba is that you're just 0:17:34.640 --> 0:17:36.439 refusing to let go of. And God is saying, if 0:17:36.480 --> 0:17:39.040 you just let go of this, not only will it 0:17:39.080 --> 0:17:41.240 save you from getting hurt, but actually have something better. 0:17:42.320 --> 0:17:48.159 And so today I want to talk about three things 0:17:48.200 --> 0:17:51.600 that don't fall in the category of sin, and maybe 0:17:51.600 --> 0:17:54.400 some are even good things that God may be calling 0:17:54.520 --> 0:17:57.960 us to let go of. And I can't preach everything 0:17:58.000 --> 0:18:00.959 about what it means to deny yourself. In twenty minutes. 0:18:01.000 --> 0:18:03.719 But I think these are things that we can make 0:18:03.800 --> 0:18:07.120 decisions on every single day, and I think God will 0:18:07.119 --> 0:18:08.920 bless us if we learn how to have a posture 0:18:09.160 --> 0:18:11.840 of letting go in the first thing is this, let 0:18:11.880 --> 0:18:21.359 go approving yourself right. Let go approving yourself right now. 0:18:21.480 --> 0:18:25.560 Do marriage counseling sometimes and one of the things I 0:18:25.560 --> 0:18:28.119 try to tell the husband's right away this is marriage 0:18:28.119 --> 0:18:32.440 one oh one fundamentalism. Marriage. There are four words, four 0:18:32.520 --> 0:18:35.280 words that you have to avoid at all costs, no 0:18:35.280 --> 0:18:37.360 matter how right you think you are, no matter how 0:18:37.440 --> 0:18:39.640 vindicated you would feel in saying them, no matter how 0:18:39.800 --> 0:18:44.080 justified you think your case is, don't say these four words. 0:18:44.119 --> 0:18:45.879 I have never said these four words because I'm not 0:18:45.920 --> 0:18:48.119 that foolish and my wife would never do anything wrong. 0:18:48.600 --> 0:18:53.240 But fellas, tell me if you if you feel me 0:18:53.240 --> 0:18:59.360 on this, I told you so. It's not worth it. 0:18:59.680 --> 0:19:03.639 Do not do it. Not even if you're putting the 0:19:03.680 --> 0:19:06.399 rowing machine on Craigslist that your wife begged for for 0:19:06.480 --> 0:19:08.800 Christmas and you said, honey, you don't need a rowing machine, 0:19:08.840 --> 0:19:10.439 you're perfect, and she said, no, I'm going to use 0:19:10.480 --> 0:19:11.960 it every single day. I want to get in shape, 0:19:12.000 --> 0:19:14.120 and I'm going to use it every day, and you're like, well, okay, 0:19:14.119 --> 0:19:15.520 I'll go ahead and buy it for you. And then 0:19:15.720 --> 0:19:17.119 she uses it twice and we use it as a 0:19:17.119 --> 0:19:18.720 coat rack in the closet after that, and you're putting 0:19:18.720 --> 0:19:20.760 it on Craigslist, which is exactly what you say, what happened. 0:19:21.520 --> 0:19:23.480 I would never say I told you so if that happened. 0:19:23.480 --> 0:19:26.119 That never happened in the Joy household. That's just a hypothetical, 0:19:26.640 --> 0:19:32.840 hypothetical situation. But we love to be proven right. And 0:19:33.040 --> 0:19:36.919 sometimes it's silly like that. Sometimes it's more serious. I 0:19:36.960 --> 0:19:40.959 listen to a podcast sometimes on potential wrongful convictions, and 0:19:41.000 --> 0:19:44.359 I can't imagine how infuriating it would be to be 0:19:44.440 --> 0:19:47.280 on trial for something that you did not do and 0:19:47.320 --> 0:19:51.240 to be convicted for that. But that's exactly what Jesus 0:19:51.280 --> 0:19:55.639 was walking into in Mark chapter eight. He was going 0:19:55.680 --> 0:19:59.720 to Jerusalem, where within days he would go from celebrated 0:19:59.760 --> 0:20:04.320 miss Pah to accuse blasphemer, where the son of God 0:20:04.720 --> 0:20:07.120 was going to be treated like a common criminal, and 0:20:07.240 --> 0:20:10.320 he didn't fight back. He could have said one word 0:20:10.440 --> 0:20:12.960 and a host a legion of angels could have come 0:20:13.000 --> 0:20:17.080 down and proven his credentials, but instead he was mostly 0:20:17.200 --> 0:20:22.680 silent at his trial. He didn't fight back. Jesus didn't 0:20:22.720 --> 0:20:26.480 try to prove he was right with his words. He 0:20:26.600 --> 0:20:31.560 simply did the right thing. And it's got me thinking 0:20:32.760 --> 0:20:37.120 about all the times I've sabotaged my relationships, not by 0:20:37.160 --> 0:20:39.840 what I did wrong, but by trying to prove that 0:20:39.880 --> 0:20:44.560 I was right, refusing to humble myself. And I believe 0:20:44.680 --> 0:20:50.760 taking up our cross in relationships means laying down our 0:20:50.840 --> 0:20:54.080 needs and taking up the needs of others, because that 0:20:54.200 --> 0:20:56.560 is the heart of Jesus, and we see that in 0:20:56.600 --> 0:20:59.640 Philippians too. Let's look at this. It says, do nothing 0:20:59.680 --> 0:21:03.880 out of selfish ambition or vain conceit. Rather, in humility, 0:21:04.280 --> 0:21:07.800 value others above yourselves, not looking to your own interests, 0:21:07.840 --> 0:21:10.200 but each of you to the interests of the others 0:21:10.440 --> 0:21:13.480 in your relationships with one another. Had the same mindset 0:21:13.680 --> 0:21:17.000 as Christ. Jesus, who, being in very nature God, did 0:21:17.040 --> 0:21:20.119 not consider equality with God something to be used to 0:21:20.200 --> 0:21:24.720 his own advantage. So have you been wronged? So is Jesus. 0:21:25.720 --> 0:21:28.399 Have you been betrayed? Jesus was betrayed by one of 0:21:28.440 --> 0:21:32.080 his closest friends. Have you been misunderstood? That is part 0:21:32.160 --> 0:21:35.320 of following Christ. Jesus was misunderstood the whole time he 0:21:35.440 --> 0:21:38.760 was in Jerusalem. And this isn't permission to be walked 0:21:38.800 --> 0:21:41.439 all over, but this is a call to value the 0:21:41.480 --> 0:21:49.159 relationship over the argument. I think the most powerful cross 0:21:49.200 --> 0:21:51.240 you can take up in any relationship is the cross 0:21:51.240 --> 0:21:56.960 of forgiveness. That means that instead of reminding your wife 0:21:57.000 --> 0:21:59.320