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Speaker 1: This is Cowboys Sam and this is eh John. And

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Speaker 1: we've last owed.

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Speaker 2: In some amazing stories for y'all the Okay Storytime podcasts.

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Speaker 3: But before that we got a wrangle, a quick little

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Speaker 3: two minute outbreak from those bucking sponsors.

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Speaker 2: We bucking love so much they paid us the bucks

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Speaker 2: to help this show stay alive. My husband wants to

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Speaker 2: open our marriage. I'm considering divorce close it for good.

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Speaker 4: Background, I thirty three Mail and my husband, thirty three Mail,

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Speaker 4: let's call him Ethan, have been married for over a

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Speaker 4: year and have been together for over three years. By

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Speaker 4: the way, this comes from Jock CDF and if you

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Speaker 4: want to spend your own stories, go to the r slash.

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Speaker 4: Okay Storytime suppered it. So Ethan was previously married for

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Speaker 4: eight years. During that time, he and his ex husband

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Speaker 4: had an open relationship. And I also just wanted to

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Speaker 4: see how so they've been married for over a year,

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Speaker 4: so like, let's say he's thirty two, okay, so you okay,

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Speaker 4: I'm twenty four to twenty five maybe all right, yep,

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Speaker 4: but eventually divorced amicably. While they were finalizing the divorce,

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Speaker 4: Ethan and I'm not Tinder, we spent almost three months

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Speaker 4: just talking online every day through text and FaceTime before

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Speaker 4: we finally met in person. When we did meet, while

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Speaker 4: Ethan was searching for an apartment so he could move

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Speaker 4: out of the house he and his ex owned together.

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Speaker 4: From that day on, we became inseparable and eventually made

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Speaker 4: our relationship official. I must say this is the best

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Speaker 4: relationship I've ever had. We do everything together. We're both

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Speaker 4: physically active, but also enjoy being couch potatoes. I love

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Speaker 4: da whether it's playing video games all night or watching TV.

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Speaker 4: Last year, Ethan got me into RuPaul's Drag Race, and

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Speaker 4: now we spend our Friday nights waiting for the latest

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Speaker 4: episode Sparkles. That's like the ideal for me, Like a

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Speaker 4: lot of activeness and then also just a lot of

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Speaker 4: little lazon around, little chill time.

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Speaker 1: Ye Angie show.

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Speaker 4: Yeah, I know. In the early stages of our relationship,

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Speaker 4: we discussed what kind of relationship we wanted. I made

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Speaker 4: it clear that I didn't want to be in an

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Speaker 4: open relationship because it's just not for me. He agreed

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Speaker 4: and said he wanted a monogamous relationship too. Is That

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Speaker 4: was one of the factors that led to the failure

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Speaker 4: of his previous marriage. Was he the one who initiated.

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Speaker 1: I was about to ask that we also.

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Speaker 4: Discussed his preferences regarding his fantasies, which I believe is

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Speaker 4: called stag or can I even say that by other

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Speaker 4: spicy hobbies? Not sure which term applies. You share that

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Speaker 4: he fantasizes about me being intimate with another man, whether

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Speaker 4: it be me using or being used by someone else. Okay,

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Speaker 4: I admitted that it would be difficult for me to

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Speaker 4: fulfill that fantasy, but I was willing to find a compromise.

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Speaker 4: But that feels like, I mean, obviously, no, that's not

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Speaker 4: what I was gonna say. It feels like that is

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Speaker 4: a not necessarily for everyone, But in this set of circumstances,

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Speaker 4: that feels like a precursor to open relationship.

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Speaker 3: Yeah, Like he's like, oh, what's the fantasy? Is things

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Speaker 3: that happen in an open relationship.

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Speaker 4: It's in an open relationship.

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Speaker 3: And then so now he's like, well, so like, but

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Speaker 3: I don't like want the open relationship.

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Speaker 4: You know, maybe it's my fantasy? Are you kink shaming?

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Speaker 4: Check me?

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Speaker 1: What do we do? Yeah? Now we're just chick me

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Speaker 1: Now have just canceled each other out? What's going on?

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Speaker 4: So we introduced toys into our schmecksy time and began

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Speaker 4: incorporating talk about scenarios involving other people called during that time.

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Speaker 4: You didn't, I said, so stop saying spicy goal. This

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Speaker 4: approach seems to work, as he appears to be satisfied.

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Speaker 1: Uh huh, never miss satisfied.

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Speaker 4: Okay. Over a year later we got married. It was

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Speaker 4: a mid sized wedding, around eighty guests at a nice venue,

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Speaker 4: around forty five guests on his side and thirty five

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Speaker 4: with mine. So two years into the relationship, it seems

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Speaker 4: or maybe is it one whole like one year total?

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Speaker 4: I can I've been married for over a year. They've

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Speaker 4: been married for over a year and have been together

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Speaker 4: for over three years. At the beginning, dig his spot

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Speaker 4: you failed. Yeah, so they've been together for three years.

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Speaker 4: So we went on a nice honeymoon to Hawaii, staying

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Speaker 4: an entire week there. Earlier today, Ethan and I made

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Speaker 4: plans for from schmicksy time while we were in bed

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Speaker 4: and I was scrolling through TikTok kind of a thing

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Speaker 4: before spicy Time.

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Speaker 1: Yeah, yeah, it was like.

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Speaker 4: Okay, okay, take five scroll break a spicy time in

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Speaker 4: five places. Thank you more? Yeah, He's like, thank you places.

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Speaker 4: That was a theater joke. He asked me a question.

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Speaker 4: You probably already know what it is from the title

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Speaker 4: of the post. He asked if I'd be willing to

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Speaker 4: open up the marriage for h some He then went

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Speaker 4: on a whole speech encouraging me to keep an open

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Speaker 4: mind and think about it. Once he was done, I

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Speaker 4: immediately said no and asked him what his reasons were

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Speaker 4: for wanting it. He gave me two reasons.

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Speaker 1: Here we go.

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Speaker 4: Fun.

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Speaker 1: Hey, did you think about fun?

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Speaker 4: I don't think you did. Excitement.

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Speaker 1: Oh, there's another one.

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Speaker 4: I don't know. It seems like the same reason, but whatever.

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Speaker 4: He's like, oh, why do you want to open the

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Speaker 4: relationship with them? And Even's like, I don't know. Fun

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Speaker 4: number one, I don't know. Number two? Excitement. Did you

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Speaker 4: think about them?

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Speaker 1: More fun? Maybe?

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Speaker 4: More fun?

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Speaker 1: Maybe some joy?

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Speaker 4: I number won Fun number two? Funner?

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Speaker 1: Yeah? Do you want me to keep going funnest?

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Speaker 4: That's at least three. I asked him if our spicy

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Speaker 4: sleeplight was boring and if that's why he wanted to

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Speaker 4: do that. He said no, and that he just wants

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Speaker 4: to spice things up a little. He also mentioned that

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Speaker 4: he's been meaning to ask me this for a while

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Speaker 4: but got too scared to do so he's been wanting

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Speaker 4: them for a while. I will say, he's kind of

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Speaker 4: already asked you before. He said this was his fantasy.

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Speaker 1: This is true, So like, I don't know if I.

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Speaker 4: Would be like completely shocked in this scenario. Yeah, my

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Speaker 4: partner said, hey, my fantasy is a three, and then

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Speaker 4: they're like, hey, I want to have a three.

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Speaker 3: I guess in fairness, it is. I guess a little

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Speaker 3: bit because it did seem like he was pretty adamant

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Speaker 3: at the beginning of relationship, like, oh, this is why

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Speaker 3: my last relationship failed, So it seems like maybe there

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Speaker 3: were some cross signals and maybe op he was leaning

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Speaker 3: so much on like Okay.

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Speaker 1: He's agreeing and like this is good.

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Speaker 3: That kind of like missing the very heavy handed Yeah.

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Speaker 4: But I'm just like a little bit confused because it

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Speaker 4: seems like we heard that Ethan said earlier, Hey, my

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Speaker 4: fantasy is this, and then Opie was like, oh, that's

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Speaker 4: not my thing, but like I can try to be

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Speaker 4: open to like thinking.

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Speaker 1: Well, they came up with an alternative.

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Speaker 4: Solution and then he's bringing it up again. Yeah, so

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Speaker 4: I just don't know if this is going to work

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Speaker 4: out that if he really wants that, and you're like, no.

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Speaker 3: Yeah, and I do think it is. I think Ethan

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Speaker 3: always wanted this, But I think I agree. I think

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Speaker 3: he lied in the beginning. Yes, and he like was

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Speaker 3: was like, oh, all work, I'll work my way up

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Speaker 3: to it over.

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Speaker 5: No.

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Speaker 4: I think he's absolutely like tricking Opine, I argued, saying

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Speaker 4: it's boring for you. You wouldn't want to spice things

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Speaker 4: up if it weren't. I told him that we were

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Speaker 4: becoming spicily incompatible and suggested that we might need to

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Speaker 4: consider being legally separated, which is kind of what I

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Speaker 4: just said. Even though I love you and this is

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Speaker 4: gonna suck, it's better to end this now because it's

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Speaker 4: something I cannot fulfill. It's against my morals, and even

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Speaker 4: if I did it once, it would unlive my mental

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Speaker 4: health to go against my principles just to please you.

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Speaker 3: Yeah, because this isn't just about like a aspect of

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Speaker 3: their their spicy sleep life. It is a kind of

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Speaker 3: promise and standard that OPI set in the beginning of

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Speaker 3: the relationship. Yeah, and so it's like, hey, you're you're

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Speaker 3: going against this, like, you know, for for me, a

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Speaker 3: non negotiable thing that I hadn't said, I want a monogamous.

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Speaker 1: Relationship, totally fair.

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Speaker 3: And it's like, if this is what you really want them,

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Speaker 3: we're incompatible exactly.

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Speaker 4: And I think that's a super fair thing to say.

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Speaker 4: It's like we just I'm never gonna do it and

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Speaker 4: you want it. And Kimberly Fine says, is OPI male

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Speaker 4: or female? OPI is male?

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Speaker 1: Mm hmm.

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Speaker 4: He got quiet and eventually said that we should go

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Speaker 4: to couples counseling. I told him that there's nothing wrong

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Speaker 4: with him. A lot of gay and straight couples have

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Speaker 4: open relationships, even polyamorous ones. But that's not for me

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Speaker 4: or something I want to be a part of. I

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Speaker 4: said it, it's better to end it now before it

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Speaker 4: reaches a point where you might resent me for not

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Speaker 4: fulfilling your fantasy. That we just lay there in bed,

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Speaker 4: deep in our thoughts. And then he went to the

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Speaker 4: store to grab something or cool off. What do you

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Speaker 4: think we should do?

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Speaker 1: I just want to call out real quick.

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Speaker 3: I love to Opie's comment on that, Hey, there's nothing

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Speaker 3: like inherently wrong with you for wanting that there are

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Speaker 3: people like is previous you know that lationship ended. But

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Speaker 3: it's like, hey, your previous husband, you both wanted that.

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Speaker 3: There's nothing wrong with you. You know, it's just not

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Speaker 3: what I want in a relationship. And I think it's

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Speaker 3: a great response. I think that's a great response. What

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Speaker 3: did you say right after that?

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Speaker 1: Too? There's another piece that I a.

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Speaker 4: Lot, But that's not I said, it's better to end

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Speaker 4: it out before it reaches a point where you might

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Speaker 4: resent me for not fulfilling your fantasy.

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Speaker 1: Yes, and then that too, So it's like, hey, there's

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Speaker 1: nothing wrong with you.

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Speaker 3: I'm not like attacking you or like what you want

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Speaker 3: out of relationship or life, and like, hey, I don't

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Speaker 3: want to like basically, I don't want to stop you

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Speaker 3: from being able to get what you want and building

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Speaker 3: up feelings of resentment and stuff.

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Speaker 1: Yeah, I like that.

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Speaker 4: Agree.

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Speaker 1: Do you think that he might weaponize the therapist?

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Speaker 4: Well, I just think there's no point, like, what what

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Speaker 4: are you going to therapy for?

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Speaker 3: Ye?

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Speaker 6: If he picked out the therapist, Hey, we're gonna go

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Speaker 6: to this therapist. I found that agrees with these kind

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Speaker 6: of things. But Opie doesn't know that.

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Speaker 4: Maybe, but it's just yeah, like the only thing that

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Speaker 4: a therapist like. It feels like what Ethan wants the

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Speaker 4: therapist to do is to completely change one either his

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Speaker 4: mind or Ope's mind, probably OPI's. Yeah, probably probably Opie's.

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Speaker 4: And which case, you can't. You can't change someone's mind

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Speaker 4: on something that's a moral value.

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Speaker 1: Yeah, and also.

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Speaker 4: You can't be you know yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.

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Speaker 1: Basically Opie is like, hey, look, this is just not

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Speaker 1: for me. You can have it.

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Speaker 3: It's fine, I don't I don't hate you for it,

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Speaker 3: but like, we just can't be in a relationship with

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Speaker 3: these misaligning things.

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Speaker 4: Yeah, that's a fair thing, but there are some comments

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Speaker 4: common one says, Honestly, it's up to you. I mean,

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Speaker 4: if my wife suggested opening the marriage, we would be done.

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Speaker 4: And that's it. You handled it well. You still showed

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Speaker 4: him love and support, and you drew your boundary. Do

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Speaker 4: you sound well adjusted? He knows the consequences now the

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Speaker 4: ball is in his comment two says pretty sure his

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Speaker 4: first marriage ended because he wanted to open it up

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Speaker 4: and his ex didn't want to, And now he's trying

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Speaker 4: his luck with you, hoping you'd be more easy to

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Speaker 4: be manipulated into it than his X was. Well, I

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Speaker 4: think that if this has always been his fantasy when

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Speaker 4: he said, oh, yeah, my previous marriage didn't work because

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Speaker 4: of an open relationship, probably something that he suggested.

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Speaker 1: Yeah, I think I think you're probably right.

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Speaker 4: If I were you and I knew the X was

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Speaker 4: not a crazy person, I'd try reaching out to ask

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Speaker 4: exactly what happened to cause it to fail inside of

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Speaker 4: the story might help you make more sense of the

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Speaker 4: story instead of only ethanside. Common three says, I really

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Speaker 4: wish people would stop requesting their partners to hook up

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Speaker 4: with other people for their pleasure. If a m effort

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Speaker 4: tells you they're monogamous, don't pretend you are two to

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Speaker 4: lock them down, then randomly try to sneak some other

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Speaker 4: people into the mix down the road. It's deceitful and

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Speaker 4: manipulative as f Sorry, Hope, I just got pissed for you.

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Speaker 3: Dude, dude, rout of applause for Sophie's freestyle censoring right there,

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Speaker 3: they're just jumping doged.

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Speaker 4: There is an update, though, give.

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Speaker 3: Me thoughts, I mean just quickly reiterating, Yeah, I liked

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Speaker 3: I liked the Opie's response and like heyl nothing wrong

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Speaker 3: with you, go live your life. But it ain't it

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Speaker 3: ain't gonna Bena be with me. Yes, and yeah, I

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Speaker 3: think the like the way o P. It's not like

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Speaker 3: he is like M I'm kind of like on the fence.

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Speaker 1: I'm not sure. Op, He's like, this is very I

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Speaker 1: know very clearly what I want.

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Speaker 3: Yeah, and so there's it's just gonna cause more friction, tension,

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Speaker 3: pain and heartache to try to spicy.

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Speaker 4: Alignment is a very important part of a relationship. Yes,

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Speaker 4: it's like you have to make sure that you guys

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Speaker 4: are both on the same page about what you want.

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Speaker 4: And if someone wants less, that's not a problem at all.

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Speaker 4: And if someone wants more that's not a problem either.

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Speaker 4: It's just you have to make sure that you're on

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Speaker 4: the same page.

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Speaker 3: What is this, dude, I'm being weaponized with the zooms today.

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Speaker 4: What are you talking about?

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Speaker 5: A line NIGN guys shop.

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Speaker 4: But there is an update.

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Speaker 1: Okay.

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Speaker 4: Since my last post, I've been sleeping on the couch

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Speaker 4: for the past two nights because I didn't want to

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Speaker 4: be around him. Last night, when I got home from work,

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Speaker 4: my husband and I spent nearly three hours discussing our

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Speaker 4: relationship and the threesome he wanted us to engage in.

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Speaker 4: I was very emotional throughout the conversation, and while I

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Speaker 4: may have forgotten some details, I remember the important points clearly.

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Speaker 4: He was very apologetic after seeing how his request slash

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Speaker 4: offer upset me, and he assured me that he didn't

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Speaker 4: mean to make a big issue of it. I started

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Speaker 4: asking him questions. I asked if there was a specific

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Speaker 4: person he had in mind for us to engage with

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Speaker 4: in the activity, and he said no. I also asked

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Speaker 4: if he had slept with anyone else since we've been together,

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Speaker 4: and he said no. I asked him if something had

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Speaker 4: happened or changed that made him want to have a

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Speaker 4: threes He said no. A lot of notes, but he

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Speaker 4: did mention that he wanted to ask just in case

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Speaker 4: my stance on them or non monogamy had changed. I

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Speaker 4: asked him again to clarify what he meant by spicying

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Speaker 4: things up, and he explained that we've been having vanilla

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Speaker 4: spicy sleep, which is why he made the suggestion.

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Speaker 1: And he did clock it. He did say early.

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Speaker 3: Ask him earlier, like, you want this because you think

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Speaker 3: our spicy sleep life is boring.

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Speaker 4: He's it's like, yeah, you wouldn't be asking otherwise.

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Speaker 1: Dude, Okay, that makes me trust you way less. War

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Speaker 1: my guy.

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Speaker 4: I told him that there's nothing wrong with vanilla spicy sleep,

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Speaker 4: but there are other ways to spice things up without

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Speaker 4: involving non monogamy, like the adult toys we use from

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Speaker 4: time to time. I then reiterated that I'm seriously considering

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Speaker 4: separation because of his quests. I also reminded him of

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Speaker 4: our plan to buy a house later this year or

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Speaker 4: early next year, and eventually adopt a child to raise

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Speaker 4: as our own. I explained that open marriages have a

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Speaker 4: high failure rate, and I don't want to adopt a

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Speaker 4: child only for them to experience us separating because our

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Speaker 4: marriage failed. Wow, this isn't the case for all open marriages.

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Speaker 4: I'm not willing to take that risk, and I don't

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Speaker 4: want that dynamic in our relationship, which is very smart.

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Speaker 4: I mean, you want as stable of a home for.

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Speaker 1: Your child, so absolutely yeah.

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Speaker 4: He then apologized again and said that his fantasies were

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Speaker 4: just that fantasies, and that he could live without them

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Speaker 4: being fulfilled and could just get off and be back

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Speaker 4: to normal. He also told me that he still loves

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Speaker 4: me so much and wants to spend the rest of

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Speaker 4: our lives together. I expressed to him that my trust

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Speaker 4: is shaken and it's going to take a lot of

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Speaker 4: work for us to get back to where we were.

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Speaker 4: He then suggested couples counseling again, and I agreed. I

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Speaker 4: also brought up the idea of seeing Spicy sleep therapist,

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Speaker 4: either for him individually or for both of us, to

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Speaker 4: help us better understand each other and possibly explore new

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Speaker 4: fantasies that we can enjoy together without involving non monogamy.

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Speaker 4: He then promised not to bring up anything about non monogamy.

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Speaker 4: I want to thank everyone who responded to my post.

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Speaker 4: I understand some of you hope for a different outcome,

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Speaker 4: but I don't want to end the relationship solely because

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Speaker 4: of Spicy related fantasies. I truly hope I made the

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Speaker 4: right choice and won't end up with a broken heart

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Speaker 4: down the line. But you know what is of the

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Speaker 4: right choice?

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Speaker 1: God?

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Speaker 4: What Sophia listening to full episodes with stories just like this?

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00:14:56,880 --> 00:15:00,360
Speaker 4: Just go to Spotify, Apple Podcasts, or iHeartRadio and search

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Speaker 4: a pocket story time. But man, there is a little

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Speaker 4: bit left to the story in John, Yes, do you

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Speaker 4: believe Ethan?

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Speaker 3: I don't believe him for a second. Also believe him either. Also,

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Speaker 3: just just the irony about He's like, hey, look, I

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Speaker 3: know things aren't going so great, so I think we

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Speaker 3: need to bring a third person in this council.

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Speaker 4: I think we need a therapist. It's not gonna look

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Speaker 4: like a therapist's office.

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Speaker 1: It's a very new style.

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Speaker 4: Yeah, it's kind of like you know how they have

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Speaker 4: music therapy.

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Speaker 3: Oh yeah, yeah, yeah, it's nothing like that. Yeah, dude,

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Speaker 3: I literally like he was just we we caught him

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Speaker 3: in he said in the beginning relationship, I'm cool with

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Speaker 3: n Agmy And he's like, I have this fantasy. He said,

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Speaker 3: our spicy sleep life isn't boring us, not it. Then

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Speaker 3: he said, we have a vanilla suppicy sleep five like

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Speaker 3: he keeps. It's not just now the misalignment in, you know,

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Speaker 3: a big foundational piece of how they want to operate

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Speaker 3: a relationship. It's also now that we keep catching him

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Speaker 3: like in these lies and I'm like, how how do

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Speaker 3: we trust him?

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Speaker 4: No, he's telling op what he wants to hear.

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Speaker 1: Yes, he's warm tongue in it.

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00:16:08,840 --> 00:16:12,040
Speaker 4: Yes, oh, dear, Yeah. I mean, like the thing is,

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Speaker 4: we already saw Ethan come top say I want to

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Speaker 4: do this and let's go to therapy, and OP said no.

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Speaker 4: And now he's saying what OP wants to hear, and

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Speaker 4: then also adding let's go to therapy. I know, like

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Speaker 4: he knows he's trying to manipulate OP, and so he's

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Speaker 4: using what OP wants to It feels like, hopefully we.

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Speaker 3: Don't have the full context of the whole relationship, but

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Speaker 3: I agree with you. From all we can see, it

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Speaker 3: absolutely seems like he's just saying that they kind of

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Speaker 3: go to it.

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Speaker 4: Yeah, but uh, there's a little bit left to the story.

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Speaker 1: Oh.

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Speaker 4: Hopefully this will be the last update on this topic,

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Speaker 4: but if there's more, I'll be sure to reach out again.

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Speaker 4: I'd also love to hear everyone's take on this. Did

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Speaker 4: I make the right choice by not ending this relationship outright?

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Speaker 4: Edit to clarify, when I said my trust is shaken,

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Speaker 4: I was referring to our relationship. I'm questioning everything we've

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Speaker 4: planned to other, including whether we should move forward with

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Speaker 4: the house and have children. I don't want to deepen

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Speaker 4: our commitments. If this is something he strongly feels about

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Speaker 4: and cannot compromise on or live without. In that case,

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Speaker 4: those plans would definitely need to be reconsidered. Comments to

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Speaker 4: finish the story off Comment one says it should be

390
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Speaker 4: okay to open up to a partner as a fantasy

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Speaker 4: as long as they get to say no and have

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Speaker 4: you respect that and not pressure them. People have fantasies,

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Speaker 4: both mundane and wild, and not being able to fill

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Speaker 4: them isn't the end of your marriage. I think you'll

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Speaker 4: get through this, that's true. I mean, there are fantasies.

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Speaker 4: Like sometimes you bring up fantasies and they're not things

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Speaker 4: that you necessarily are, like a sneaks app but I'm

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Speaker 4: just you know.

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Speaker 1: Yeah, it's like about this.

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Speaker 3: It's like it's like when you go to a restaurant

401
00:17:42,040 --> 00:17:44,800
Speaker 3: and you're like, oh, hey, do you have like my

402
00:17:44,680 --> 00:17:47,320
Speaker 3: my favorite salmonedih and like ah, Nah's like oh, well,

403
00:17:47,359 --> 00:17:49,480
Speaker 3: like do you have like a like a beer battered

404
00:17:49,480 --> 00:17:51,040
Speaker 3: fish and like yeah, like okay, great.

405
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Speaker 4: Yeah exactly. I mean, and I think that really quickly.

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Speaker 4: I think that would have been fine if Ethan had

407
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Speaker 4: come and said, hey, this is my fantasy and then ope,

408
00:17:58,440 --> 00:18:00,520
Speaker 4: he said, I don't ever want to do that.

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Speaker 1: This is not that. This case is not no.

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Speaker 4: It's a it's like Ethan came said, this is my fantasy.

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Speaker 4: He said no. Ethan said, okay, that's totally fine. I

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00:18:10,000 --> 00:18:12,119
Speaker 4: don't even care. Then came back and said, actually I

413
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Speaker 4: do care. Let's do it, and op he said no,

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Speaker 4: and he said, oh but it's boring, like our spicy

415
00:18:16,280 --> 00:18:18,159
Speaker 4: sleep life is boring. And so it was just this

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00:18:18,240 --> 00:18:20,480
Speaker 4: back and forth of him lying yes, yeah.

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Speaker 6: Also I forgot this was two dudes until now. Yes,

418
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Speaker 6: And if this is the case, dide I just punch

419
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Speaker 6: him and be like, leave me alone.

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00:18:27,720 --> 00:18:30,600
Speaker 4: No, I don't know. That's terrible advice.

421
00:18:30,440 --> 00:18:33,160
Speaker 1: Is knock my brother? You know that's that's the abuse.

422
00:18:33,560 --> 00:18:36,359
Speaker 1: Oh that's me and my brother hit each other all

423
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Speaker 1: the time.

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00:18:36,680 --> 00:18:38,520
Speaker 4: It's not your brother, this is your partner.

425
00:18:39,240 --> 00:18:42,399
Speaker 1: Well, you guys are still bros. No, false, Come on,

426
00:18:42,520 --> 00:18:44,080
Speaker 1: if you're a couple, aren't you bros?

427
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Speaker 3: No?

428
00:18:45,720 --> 00:18:47,920
Speaker 4: You were like definition not bros.

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Speaker 6: I don't know, but like bros are pretty tie and

430
00:18:50,160 --> 00:18:51,760
Speaker 6: then they like hit each other. But you're saying if

431
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Speaker 6: I marry a dude, I can't hit him.

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00:18:53,359 --> 00:18:57,080
Speaker 1: Yes, that is what we're saying. That's exactly.

433
00:18:58,680 --> 00:19:01,680
Speaker 4: Okay, That's why Riley's not yet.

434
00:19:04,520 --> 00:19:04,879
Speaker 1: Reply.

435
00:19:05,320 --> 00:19:07,040
Speaker 4: Would you be able to look at your wife or

436
00:19:07,119 --> 00:19:09,640
Speaker 4: husband the same again if they told you they had

437
00:19:09,640 --> 00:19:12,760
Speaker 4: a fantasy associated with eating each other's extra I don't

438
00:19:12,760 --> 00:19:15,560
Speaker 4: even want to say that. Probably not, lol. It is

439
00:19:15,600 --> 00:19:18,280
Speaker 4: definitely okay to open up about fantasies, but it is

440
00:19:18,320 --> 00:19:20,719
Speaker 4: also okay for the person to find the revelation that

441
00:19:20,720 --> 00:19:23,119
Speaker 4: their partner is interested in that thing to be distressing.

442
00:19:23,320 --> 00:19:24,800
Speaker 4: I think that goes into like kink shaming.

443
00:19:25,240 --> 00:19:27,600
Speaker 1: Seems like that's where that's at. But yeah, you know,

444
00:19:28,000 --> 00:19:28,560
Speaker 1: but yeah, I know.

445
00:19:28,960 --> 00:19:33,040
Speaker 3: Sometimes again, sometimes people don't have the same the same preferences,

446
00:19:33,080 --> 00:19:35,800
Speaker 3: and that's okay, that's okay.

447
00:19:36,200 --> 00:19:38,720
Speaker 4: Totally, And sometimes it doesn't mean the end of the

448
00:19:38,720 --> 00:19:42,159
Speaker 4: relationship because that person's preferences are not like make or

449
00:19:42,160 --> 00:19:44,399
Speaker 4: break for them. And sometimes it does mean the end

450
00:19:44,440 --> 00:19:46,560
Speaker 4: of the relationship because it is make or break for them.

451
00:19:46,720 --> 00:19:50,200
Speaker 3: Yes, and to us this seems like one of those times,

452
00:19:50,240 --> 00:19:53,119
Speaker 3: but apparently to op it is not. You know, and

453
00:19:53,280 --> 00:19:55,800
Speaker 3: you know, more power to them. Hopefully the counseling goes

454
00:19:55,840 --> 00:19:57,760
Speaker 3: well and they learn and who knows.

455
00:19:58,040 --> 00:20:00,600
Speaker 4: I so agree, and you're poison. Toonic has a great

456
00:20:00,680 --> 00:20:02,960
Speaker 4: quote from Severn's bow efeculence.

457
00:20:03,520 --> 00:20:06,639
Speaker 3: All right, we're getting the sex story already.

458
00:20:06,720 --> 00:20:09,120
Speaker 1: We're gonna close out. My wife belittles me in public,

459
00:20:09,320 --> 00:20:11,400
Speaker 1: but is the total opposite in private.

460
00:20:11,600 --> 00:20:17,480
Speaker 3: Mmmm, that's called the step on me Mommy, well baby,

461
00:20:17,600 --> 00:20:19,280
Speaker 3: humiliate is too strong a word.

462
00:20:19,440 --> 00:20:23,160
Speaker 1: Tell Riley that more like condescends to me. So my wife,

463
00:20:23,240 --> 00:20:26,600
Speaker 1: what's color? Victoria is tall, beautiful, and well educated. Her

464
00:20:26,600 --> 00:20:28,440
Speaker 1: degrees in social science. She's a writer.

465
00:20:28,520 --> 00:20:32,920
Speaker 3: Her writings are mostly critical treatses. I probably pronounced that wrong,

466
00:20:33,359 --> 00:20:35,679
Speaker 3: but as of yet she has not published anything. She

467
00:20:35,960 --> 00:20:39,080
Speaker 3: is a volunteer Buddist.

468
00:20:39,800 --> 00:20:40,720
Speaker 1: What does that mean?

469
00:20:42,040 --> 00:20:42,520
Speaker 4: Assistant?

470
00:20:42,920 --> 00:20:47,280
Speaker 1: Okay? Can you text that Toanina? Can you text that? Please?

471
00:20:47,359 --> 00:20:47,800
Speaker 1: Thank you?

472
00:20:48,080 --> 00:20:53,040
Speaker 3: She is a volunteer assistant at a yoga meditation group

473
00:20:53,200 --> 00:20:55,400
Speaker 3: once or twice a month. By the way, this comes

474
00:20:55,440 --> 00:20:57,960
Speaker 3: from Lebon Holme Oliver And if you want to submit

475
00:20:58,000 --> 00:20:59,960
Speaker 3: your own story, it's good our slash Okay, storytime, So

476
00:21:00,000 --> 00:21:01,720
Speaker 3: I read it. I have a master's degree in history

477
00:21:01,800 --> 00:21:04,080
Speaker 3: and teach that subject at a community college. I also

478
00:21:04,080 --> 00:21:06,600
Speaker 3: work at the same yoga studio at which Victoria volunteers,

479
00:21:06,640 --> 00:21:08,760
Speaker 3: but as a full time teacher. I teach hot yoga

480
00:21:08,840 --> 00:21:11,440
Speaker 3: and yoga with weights. Don't sign sofia up.

481
00:21:11,560 --> 00:21:13,399
Speaker 4: I will get heat stroke.

482
00:21:13,440 --> 00:21:16,040
Speaker 3: She will pass out. We met a community college I

483
00:21:16,080 --> 00:21:18,000
Speaker 3: teach at three years ago. She was taking a writing

484
00:21:18,040 --> 00:21:20,320
Speaker 3: workshop and I happened to be friends with the instructor

485
00:21:20,320 --> 00:21:23,400
Speaker 3: and met Victorian class. Five months later, we were engaged.

486
00:21:23,560 --> 00:21:26,560
Speaker 1: What wow, that's quick. That is a super quick.

487
00:21:26,640 --> 00:21:30,240
Speaker 3: At that time, Victoria supported herself as a substitute teacher

488
00:21:30,240 --> 00:21:32,480
Speaker 3: and a sales associate at a department store. Now that

489
00:21:32,520 --> 00:21:35,040
Speaker 3: she's married to me, she doesn't work. We rely completely

490
00:21:35,080 --> 00:21:38,320
Speaker 3: on my salary as a college teacher primarily, and as

491
00:21:38,359 --> 00:21:41,280
Speaker 3: a secondary source, my salary as a yoga teacher. I

492
00:21:41,320 --> 00:21:44,439
Speaker 3: consider my marriage to Victoria to be generally happy. However,

493
00:21:44,600 --> 00:21:47,920
Speaker 3: she kind of is disrespectful to me. I think we're

494
00:21:47,920 --> 00:21:50,720
Speaker 3: a I think we're about to open a can of worms.

495
00:21:51,040 --> 00:21:53,360
Speaker 4: I think she's got a degradation.

496
00:21:54,040 --> 00:21:58,080
Speaker 1: Oh yes, yes. Remember in the first few moments of

497
00:21:58,440 --> 00:22:00,600
Speaker 1: for Christmases, that movie Christmases?

498
00:22:00,640 --> 00:22:00,919
Speaker 4: What's that?

499
00:22:00,960 --> 00:22:03,359
Speaker 6: Anyways, there's a couple role playing this it's very early,

500
00:22:03,480 --> 00:22:06,440
Speaker 6: not spoiling anything, and this one's like, gee, says really

501
00:22:06,480 --> 00:22:08,159
Speaker 6: mean things and the guy snaps.

502
00:22:07,800 --> 00:22:12,680
Speaker 1: Back, shut up witch, and she's like and then they

503
00:22:12,680 --> 00:22:13,240
Speaker 1: go home together.

504
00:22:13,400 --> 00:22:16,880
Speaker 3: Uh oh, and then you're like, oh, it's that's their thing.

505
00:22:17,000 --> 00:22:18,520
Speaker 1: Yeah, yeah, so you might have to just do that.

506
00:22:18,960 --> 00:22:20,160
Speaker 4: Yeah, maybe it's their thing.

507
00:22:20,400 --> 00:22:21,800
Speaker 1: Maybe we're about to find out.

508
00:22:21,880 --> 00:22:24,560
Speaker 3: In private, she's great, our spicy sleep life is completely

509
00:22:24,560 --> 00:22:28,080
Speaker 3: normal and frequent. She'll laugh, joke, and be conversational with me.

510
00:22:28,640 --> 00:22:31,320
Speaker 3: We'll just be a normal, happy, married couple outside her home,

511
00:22:31,320 --> 00:22:34,959
Speaker 3: though outside she seems to be a completely different person.

512
00:22:35,280 --> 00:22:37,399
Speaker 3: When we're out with friends, She'll often make it a

513
00:22:37,440 --> 00:22:39,959
Speaker 3: point to say I'm not a real college professor. If

514
00:22:39,960 --> 00:22:42,520
Speaker 3: it comes up in conversation, she's like, he's not a

515
00:22:42,560 --> 00:22:48,919
Speaker 3: real doctor. Dude, came on, and his salary is what

516
00:22:49,000 --> 00:22:51,320
Speaker 3: they're basing basing both of their livelihood.

517
00:22:50,920 --> 00:22:53,320
Speaker 1: Off of two Ooh not cool, girl.

518
00:22:53,600 --> 00:22:56,320
Speaker 3: Cool, come on, because my job is at a community

519
00:22:56,320 --> 00:22:58,879
Speaker 3: college and not a four year university. Or if I

520
00:22:58,920 --> 00:23:01,480
Speaker 3: tell people I'm a yo teacher, she'll make sure to

521
00:23:01,520 --> 00:23:04,920
Speaker 3: say something like he chose wearing tights over a PhD.

522
00:23:05,119 --> 00:23:05,800
Speaker 4: I hate that?

523
00:23:06,119 --> 00:23:09,399
Speaker 1: Why? What what are we doing here? This is just

524
00:23:09,440 --> 00:23:11,639
Speaker 1: a bully, Yeah she is.

525
00:23:11,680 --> 00:23:14,679
Speaker 3: Though meanwhile she knows perfectly well, I can't afford to

526
00:23:14,720 --> 00:23:17,119
Speaker 3: go back to school right now to finish my doctorates

527
00:23:17,280 --> 00:23:18,880
Speaker 3: because I'm working.

528
00:23:18,600 --> 00:23:21,240
Speaker 1: To support both of us and she doesn't earn any money.

529
00:23:22,160 --> 00:23:27,560
Speaker 6: Girl girl, And you know Opie's a good guy because

530
00:23:27,720 --> 00:23:30,000
Speaker 6: you know he could just throw this in her face. Well,

531
00:23:30,040 --> 00:23:32,080
Speaker 6: maybe I'd go back to school to work out a

532
00:23:32,119 --> 00:23:33,800
Speaker 6: real school if you would actually.

533
00:23:33,440 --> 00:23:34,240
Speaker 1: Pay for something.

534
00:23:34,520 --> 00:23:38,280
Speaker 4: There's like playful ribbing that's okay between like friends or

535
00:23:38,320 --> 00:23:40,480
Speaker 4: partners and stuff where it's just like, oh, like no,

536
00:23:40,720 --> 00:23:42,359
Speaker 4: you know you did that oah blah blah blah. This

537
00:23:42,480 --> 00:23:45,080
Speaker 4: is just bullying. This is just mean and it's obviously

538
00:23:45,119 --> 00:23:47,120
Speaker 4: affecting you. It's definitely like call around on that.

539
00:23:47,400 --> 00:23:50,480
Speaker 1: Yeah, one hundred. Also, could you never say that word again?

540
00:23:50,800 --> 00:23:51,159
Speaker 4: Ribbing?

541
00:23:51,480 --> 00:23:53,480
Speaker 1: Please, that's what it's called. I don't like it.

542
00:23:54,840 --> 00:23:55,280
Speaker 2: Teasing.

543
00:23:55,520 --> 00:24:01,480
Speaker 4: I'm sure playful banter, Banta school bunta AnyWho.

544
00:24:01,600 --> 00:24:04,480
Speaker 3: So Opie says, it's also kind of hurtful because I

545
00:24:04,560 --> 00:24:06,680
Speaker 3: know if I said something like you shouldn't call yourself

546
00:24:06,720 --> 00:24:09,120
Speaker 3: a professional writer if no one ever wanted to buy

547
00:24:09,160 --> 00:24:12,879
Speaker 3: your articles, and also pointed out that I myself have

548
00:24:12,960 --> 00:24:15,680
Speaker 3: been published numerous times in a minor sense, she would

549
00:24:15,720 --> 00:24:16,760
Speaker 3: probably get really hurt.

550
00:24:17,080 --> 00:24:19,000
Speaker 1: Hence why I would never say that to her.

551
00:24:19,400 --> 00:24:22,359
Speaker 4: Yeah, if you're even thinking that you need to have

552
00:24:22,400 --> 00:24:26,880
Speaker 4: a conversation asap with her and say, hey, you're hurting

553
00:24:26,920 --> 00:24:29,760
Speaker 4: my feelings. Yes, this is bring it up.

554
00:24:30,200 --> 00:24:30,800
Speaker 1: This is not good.

555
00:24:30,880 --> 00:24:33,639
Speaker 3: Victoria also identifies it as a feminist in public and

556
00:24:33,680 --> 00:24:35,760
Speaker 3: says that she and other women are oppressed and being

557
00:24:35,760 --> 00:24:38,439
Speaker 3: held down by men. I don't remember ever trying to

558
00:24:38,440 --> 00:24:40,520
Speaker 3: hold her back from doing what she wants. In fact,

559
00:24:40,560 --> 00:24:42,920
Speaker 3: I encouraged her to write articles and always buy her

560
00:24:42,920 --> 00:24:45,600
Speaker 3: whatever materials and posted she asked in order to try

561
00:24:45,600 --> 00:24:46,720
Speaker 3: and get herself publish.

562
00:24:46,760 --> 00:24:49,119
Speaker 4: Well, she's probably not talking about you.

563
00:24:49,240 --> 00:24:51,720
Speaker 1: Yeah, he's your your conflicting Yeah.

564
00:24:51,640 --> 00:24:55,080
Speaker 4: She's like, oh, she's always says she's oppressed by men,

565
00:24:55,200 --> 00:24:58,480
Speaker 4: but not all men. It's like, okay, she's not talking

566
00:24:58,480 --> 00:24:58,800
Speaker 4: about you.

567
00:24:58,800 --> 00:25:01,120
Speaker 1: Any one of these things. Don't gotta be about the other.

568
00:25:01,240 --> 00:25:01,760
Speaker 1: MAA why.

569
00:25:02,119 --> 00:25:05,040
Speaker 3: But she'll also ironically say a bunch of sexist stuff

570
00:25:05,040 --> 00:25:07,560
Speaker 3: when we're out in public with other people, often saying

571
00:25:07,600 --> 00:25:09,880
Speaker 3: I have no sense of direction since I'm a man,

572
00:25:10,240 --> 00:25:13,080
Speaker 3: that all I do is think with my wiener and

573
00:25:13,119 --> 00:25:15,800
Speaker 3: that I'm messy, that I love to eat, and she'll

574
00:25:15,840 --> 00:25:17,760
Speaker 3: pat my stomach as if I'm fat.

575
00:25:18,000 --> 00:25:20,840
Speaker 4: The thing is like, I think she's just being mean

576
00:25:21,000 --> 00:25:24,200
Speaker 4: to you, you know, yeah, Like I like they could

577
00:25:24,280 --> 00:25:25,840
Speaker 4: have something to do with sexist her, but but I

578
00:25:25,880 --> 00:25:28,560
Speaker 4: feel like it's just like she does, like she's being

579
00:25:28,680 --> 00:25:30,600
Speaker 4: mean to you that at the end of the day,

580
00:25:30,720 --> 00:25:33,280
Speaker 4: that's the problem here, and that's not okay.

581
00:25:33,560 --> 00:25:36,919
Speaker 3: Yes, one hundred percent my abs are ripped by the

582
00:25:36,920 --> 00:25:38,679
Speaker 3: way she's boothing you.

583
00:25:38,880 --> 00:25:40,440
Speaker 4: She wants to like make you insecure.

584
00:25:40,760 --> 00:25:43,639
Speaker 1: Yeah, which is dude, so completely talk to me.

585
00:25:43,720 --> 00:25:46,800
Speaker 4: Theory she because she has no money, like she's not

586
00:25:46,880 --> 00:25:48,919
Speaker 4: bringing any in any of the money in, like she

587
00:25:48,920 --> 00:25:51,320
Speaker 4: doesn't have a job or anything. She feels less like

588
00:25:51,359 --> 00:25:53,520
Speaker 4: bad about herself and so she's trying to bring a

589
00:25:53,600 --> 00:25:56,840
Speaker 4: pee down. It's like classic me and girl like, oh

590
00:25:57,040 --> 00:25:59,200
Speaker 4: I'm insecure, so I'm gonna make other people.

591
00:25:59,000 --> 00:26:02,840
Speaker 1: Insecure, right. I think you're right, But it's it's sad.

592
00:26:03,119 --> 00:26:04,719
Speaker 4: It's sad, not okay.

593
00:26:04,880 --> 00:26:07,359
Speaker 3: But if I said something even a remotely sexist, like

594
00:26:07,440 --> 00:26:10,080
Speaker 3: she loves shoes or some crap like that, she wouldn't

595
00:26:10,119 --> 00:26:10,400
Speaker 3: like it.

596
00:26:10,840 --> 00:26:12,560
Speaker 1: She likes that's is that work.

597
00:26:12,720 --> 00:26:13,439
Speaker 4: She likes shoes.

598
00:26:13,600 --> 00:26:16,080
Speaker 1: One of these things is that, Like the other was using.

599
00:26:15,920 --> 00:26:18,080
Speaker 4: The word sexist, and I don't think it means what

600
00:26:18,160 --> 00:26:21,800
Speaker 4: he thinks it means she's bullying you, And I think

601
00:26:21,840 --> 00:26:24,840
Speaker 4: she just likes shoes. If you're saying she likes shoes,

602
00:26:24,920 --> 00:26:26,159
Speaker 4: maybe she just likes shoes.

603
00:26:26,320 --> 00:26:28,800
Speaker 6: I told her she likes shoes, or maybe I thought

604
00:26:28,800 --> 00:26:31,040
Speaker 6: it was he said, oh, you like shoes, and she

605
00:26:31,200 --> 00:26:32,320
Speaker 6: was like, stop being.

606
00:26:32,240 --> 00:26:37,080
Speaker 4: Sex as Like if I said you like washing, Riley liked, okay,

607
00:26:37,119 --> 00:26:40,040
Speaker 4: well I don't like washing. The hold an amn like

608
00:26:41,200 --> 00:26:44,359
Speaker 4: a minute for example. Not sexist me saying, oh, Riley

609
00:26:44,480 --> 00:26:48,240
Speaker 4: likes cutting wood, chopping wood, like that's just true sexist

610
00:26:48,440 --> 00:26:49,720
Speaker 4: Riley calling me a dishwasher.

611
00:26:49,960 --> 00:26:50,520
Speaker 1: There we go.

612
00:26:50,600 --> 00:26:52,720
Speaker 6: Wait wait wait wait wait wait wait, I thought you

613
00:26:52,720 --> 00:26:54,200
Speaker 6: were going to call me something sexist.

614
00:26:54,359 --> 00:26:56,040
Speaker 4: No no, no, I was showing two examples.

615
00:26:57,920 --> 00:27:00,480
Speaker 6: No, no, no, you gotta that doesn't make any since, okay,

616
00:27:01,000 --> 00:27:02,000
Speaker 6: something sexist.

617
00:27:02,240 --> 00:27:06,360
Speaker 4: Riley should pay for everyone's meals.

618
00:27:06,560 --> 00:27:10,439
Speaker 1: All right, there you go take it, there, gotta love it.

619
00:27:11,119 --> 00:27:12,720
Speaker 1: Examples have been examped.

620
00:27:12,880 --> 00:27:15,320
Speaker 3: It seems like I'm more considerate of her feelings than

621
00:27:15,359 --> 00:27:17,760
Speaker 3: she is of mine. Once we're back at our own home,

622
00:27:17,880 --> 00:27:19,800
Speaker 3: she's nice to me, telling me how much she loves

623
00:27:19,800 --> 00:27:21,800
Speaker 3: to cook for me and how great I am, and

624
00:27:21,800 --> 00:27:24,280
Speaker 3: how she's my woman and how she loves it when

625
00:27:24,320 --> 00:27:26,080
Speaker 3: I get a little rough with her, and so I

626
00:27:26,119 --> 00:27:29,000
Speaker 3: oblige in an affectionate sense. When I try to talk

627
00:27:29,000 --> 00:27:31,120
Speaker 3: to her about the hurtful thing she says, she'll act

628
00:27:31,160 --> 00:27:33,040
Speaker 3: like she has no idea what I'm talking about, or

629
00:27:33,040 --> 00:27:35,879
Speaker 3: accuse me of just being sensitive it quickly changed the subject,

630
00:27:36,040 --> 00:27:38,160
Speaker 3: or else she'll just start coming on to me. We'll

631
00:27:38,160 --> 00:27:41,000
Speaker 3: have spicy sleep and of course I will be distracted.

632
00:27:41,080 --> 00:27:43,720
Speaker 3: I don't know, we can trying to have a conversation

633
00:27:43,720 --> 00:27:45,960
Speaker 3: with her. Yeah, So basically when he brings it up,

634
00:27:46,160 --> 00:27:48,719
Speaker 3: sometimes she'll divert someway. One of the ways is if

635
00:27:48,720 --> 00:27:50,800
Speaker 3: he's bringing it up, she just starts coming on to him,

636
00:27:50,840 --> 00:27:51,040
Speaker 3: and my.

637
00:27:51,080 --> 00:27:55,080
Speaker 4: Guy, you gotta you gotta like hold on, you know, Yeah,

638
00:27:55,240 --> 00:28:01,879
Speaker 4: just stays strong. Whoa stop, stop, Let's have a conversation.

639
00:28:02,200 --> 00:28:05,000
Speaker 3: Let me tell you something, Okay, unless what we gotta do,

640
00:28:05,160 --> 00:28:07,399
Speaker 3: I don't know. We completely depend on my job to

641
00:28:07,440 --> 00:28:09,520
Speaker 3: put food on the table and a roof over our heads.

642
00:28:09,600 --> 00:28:11,520
Speaker 3: I don't think that these are things to joke about

643
00:28:11,600 --> 00:28:13,879
Speaker 3: or belittle. It kind of hurts my self esteem. Yeah,

644
00:28:14,119 --> 00:28:16,960
Speaker 3: like I'm not doing enough with my life. What can

645
00:28:17,000 --> 00:28:19,440
Speaker 3: I do to help Victoria? Realize how mean she's behaving,

646
00:28:19,480 --> 00:28:22,040
Speaker 3: how her attitude just isn't right when it comes to

647
00:28:22,040 --> 00:28:22,720
Speaker 3: the things she's saying.

648
00:28:22,720 --> 00:28:23,880
Speaker 1: And we have an update.

649
00:28:24,200 --> 00:28:28,160
Speaker 3: Let's answer Opeace question, Sophia, how can op tell his wife, hey,

650
00:28:28,560 --> 00:28:29,280
Speaker 3: these things hurt me?

651
00:28:29,480 --> 00:28:31,760
Speaker 4: Well, first off, you have the conversation, and when she

652
00:28:31,800 --> 00:28:36,199
Speaker 4: tries to sidetrack you, you go stop, sit over there, but

653
00:28:36,280 --> 00:28:38,120
Speaker 4: try and do it in a not sexy way, And

654
00:28:38,200 --> 00:28:42,120
Speaker 4: so she sits over there and then you say hey, tough, tough,

655
00:28:42,640 --> 00:28:46,640
Speaker 4: like wait geez ah, and you say, hey, the comments

656
00:28:46,640 --> 00:28:49,040
Speaker 4: that you've been making about my job and about me,

657
00:28:49,240 --> 00:28:51,840
Speaker 4: I've really hurt my feelings and I don't appreciate them.

658
00:28:51,960 --> 00:28:55,480
Speaker 1: Bingo, bingo, bango ding spot. Who is the bully or

659
00:28:55,640 --> 00:28:56,520
Speaker 1: person being mean?

660
00:28:56,840 --> 00:28:58,560
Speaker 3: First answer was the characters in the story or named

661
00:28:58,600 --> 00:29:01,719
Speaker 3: Victorian Ope. Second one, In this story, the character Victoria

662
00:29:01,800 --> 00:29:04,320
Speaker 3: is betrayed as the bully or the person being disrespectful

663
00:29:04,360 --> 00:29:05,640
Speaker 3: and mean ports her husband.

664
00:29:05,720 --> 00:29:07,560
Speaker 1: I'm that's opy ingas is dingusing.

665
00:29:08,000 --> 00:29:11,040
Speaker 3: We're getting there, boys and girls, but we're also getting

666
00:29:11,040 --> 00:29:14,280
Speaker 3: into this next updates. So first of all, I can't

667
00:29:14,320 --> 00:29:16,640
Speaker 3: thank all of you enough for your encouraging, helpful advice.

668
00:29:16,760 --> 00:29:19,160
Speaker 3: I also got so many private messages that were extremely

669
00:29:19,160 --> 00:29:20,040
Speaker 3: helpful in showing me.

670
00:29:20,000 --> 00:29:21,800
Speaker 1: That I really do need to stand up for myself.

671
00:29:21,880 --> 00:29:23,520
Speaker 1: The original post is below this update.

672
00:29:23,600 --> 00:29:26,440
Speaker 3: I decided this morning it's a new day, Independence day,

673
00:29:26,680 --> 00:29:27,680
Speaker 3: So why not start now?

674
00:29:27,760 --> 00:29:29,720
Speaker 1: Is OPI about to become a lot more independent?

675
00:29:31,320 --> 00:29:31,520
Speaker 3: Hint?

676
00:29:31,840 --> 00:29:32,280
Speaker 1: I see you?

677
00:29:32,680 --> 00:29:34,800
Speaker 3: So an answer of some of the questions I got

678
00:29:34,800 --> 00:29:36,160
Speaker 3: asked at least a dozen times.

679
00:29:36,440 --> 00:29:38,720
Speaker 1: Yes, she is hot, Yes.

680
00:29:38,640 --> 00:29:41,680
Speaker 4: She's hot. It doesn't it's not relevant.

681
00:29:41,320 --> 00:29:46,560
Speaker 3: Re readuncuously hot. She's five eleven with a body like

682
00:29:46,880 --> 00:29:50,400
Speaker 3: Gesell bunche in both a nicer face, Kyley, can you

683
00:29:50,600 --> 00:29:51,080
Speaker 3: look at that?

684
00:29:51,200 --> 00:29:53,400
Speaker 4: And also that seems kind of insulting to Giseel?

685
00:29:53,760 --> 00:29:57,160
Speaker 1: Oh true, Yeah, Opie keeps throwing throwing, stra does have

686
00:29:57,200 --> 00:30:00,000
Speaker 1: a nice face, that's the shocking thing. Let's see it.

687
00:30:00,080 --> 00:30:02,360
Speaker 4: Well, I would say, like, but an even nicer face

688
00:30:02,600 --> 00:30:03,520
Speaker 4: like that, but a.

689
00:30:03,560 --> 00:30:06,560
Speaker 1: Nice face even more yeautiful.

690
00:30:06,160 --> 00:30:08,720
Speaker 4: Yeah he was but a nice but like if she

691
00:30:08,800 --> 00:30:12,240
Speaker 4: had a nice face, like a beautiful woman.

692
00:30:12,440 --> 00:30:15,280
Speaker 3: Yeah, and Opie says, I myself am six three humble

693
00:30:15,280 --> 00:30:19,080
Speaker 3: brag butit okay? And yes, part of why I put

694
00:30:19,160 --> 00:30:22,360
Speaker 3: up with her behavior so long is because, yes, smashing

695
00:30:22,400 --> 00:30:25,560
Speaker 3: that is a privilege, and yes, at the time, I

696
00:30:25,640 --> 00:30:27,080
Speaker 3: was thinking with my wiener.

697
00:30:27,320 --> 00:30:30,560
Speaker 4: So when your when your wife says, oh, he's always

698
00:30:30,600 --> 00:30:32,920
Speaker 4: thinking with his is wiener, it's true.

699
00:30:33,440 --> 00:30:36,960
Speaker 3: Well that's because I was thinking with my wiener, says Opie.

700
00:30:37,160 --> 00:30:39,360
Speaker 1: But anyways, here's John, you og host.

701
00:30:39,400 --> 00:30:39,480
Speaker 3: Here.

702
00:30:39,520 --> 00:30:40,880
Speaker 1: We're gonna get back to the stories. But here's a

703
00:30:40,920 --> 00:30:42,960
Speaker 1: quick three minute break of ass from our sponsors.

704
00:30:43,400 --> 00:30:45,680
Speaker 3: We had a brunch, just turned myself and I figured

705
00:30:45,800 --> 00:30:48,320
Speaker 3: that because you're in a crowded, popular restaurant yet at

706
00:30:48,320 --> 00:30:50,240
Speaker 3: a table for two, she wouldn't cause the scene or

707
00:30:50,280 --> 00:30:52,320
Speaker 3: yell at me. So I followed a lot of people's advice,

708
00:30:52,600 --> 00:30:54,239
Speaker 3: just held her hand and reminded her that I love

709
00:30:54,280 --> 00:30:56,120
Speaker 3: her and I'm totally in love with their respect her

710
00:30:56,120 --> 00:30:58,240
Speaker 3: and will always be on her side. But I reminded

711
00:30:58,240 --> 00:31:00,360
Speaker 3: her that she had said things in the past more

712
00:31:00,400 --> 00:31:03,520
Speaker 3: often than one or two isolated incidents where I felt

713
00:31:03,600 --> 00:31:06,160
Speaker 3: totally disrespected. I reminded her that I worked hard at

714
00:31:06,160 --> 00:31:08,160
Speaker 3: two jobs, keep both of us in comfort in a

715
00:31:08,240 --> 00:31:10,120
Speaker 3: nice home, and that I support her in all she

716
00:31:10,160 --> 00:31:11,760
Speaker 3: wants to do in life. I reminded her that I

717
00:31:11,800 --> 00:31:13,959
Speaker 3: have tried numerous times in the past to discuss her

718
00:31:14,000 --> 00:31:16,160
Speaker 3: disrespect with me, but she always blew me off, and

719
00:31:16,200 --> 00:31:18,920
Speaker 3: I reminded her like oh he loves reminding blinded her

720
00:31:18,960 --> 00:31:20,200
Speaker 3: that I've always supported her and.

721
00:31:20,200 --> 00:31:22,640
Speaker 4: Spoke, yeah, she always blew you off.

722
00:31:23,160 --> 00:31:28,200
Speaker 2: Oh God, sophieing got m ladies and gentlemen.

723
00:31:30,080 --> 00:31:32,200
Speaker 1: Got him, and spoke highly of her.

724
00:31:32,320 --> 00:31:35,040
Speaker 4: Don't always like what I have to do.

725
00:31:35,080 --> 00:31:37,440
Speaker 1: You see what I've become because of these pies.

726
00:31:37,720 --> 00:31:40,240
Speaker 3: And always smoke higher of her because she is my wife.

727
00:31:40,280 --> 00:31:42,360
Speaker 3: First of all, I love her, and second because I

728
00:31:42,400 --> 00:31:44,840
Speaker 3: believe every word when I say I love her, respect

729
00:31:44,840 --> 00:31:47,320
Speaker 3: her nice. I reminded her how smart she is and

730
00:31:47,360 --> 00:31:49,920
Speaker 3: she can't possibly fail to see that what she's doing

731
00:31:50,000 --> 00:31:50,760
Speaker 3: is hurtful to me.

732
00:31:51,040 --> 00:31:52,880
Speaker 1: Yeah, okay, what's the problem.

733
00:31:53,320 --> 00:31:55,880
Speaker 4: Well, that was a whole lot of preamble.

734
00:31:55,920 --> 00:31:57,640
Speaker 1: We got it, We got a whole whole lot of.

735
00:31:57,800 --> 00:31:58,840
Speaker 4: We got a butt coming out.

736
00:32:00,440 --> 00:32:03,120
Speaker 1: Okay, I can't even lie. She really surprised. She actually

737
00:32:03,120 --> 00:32:03,880
Speaker 1: started to cry.

738
00:32:04,560 --> 00:32:12,840
Speaker 3: Embarrassing, Sophia slipped some more silly juice. We were at

739
00:32:12,880 --> 00:32:14,600
Speaker 3: a corner table and no one could see her, so

740
00:32:14,680 --> 00:32:15,960
Speaker 3: she wasn't scared of looking.

741
00:32:15,720 --> 00:32:17,560
Speaker 1: Bad in front of strangers or embarrassing herself.

742
00:32:17,600 --> 00:32:19,320
Speaker 3: The waiter came up to the table a couple of

743
00:32:19,320 --> 00:32:22,440
Speaker 3: times to offer things, but I signaled him to come later.

744
00:32:22,840 --> 00:32:25,440
Speaker 1: Sometimes wads becoming at the worst time, we really do.

745
00:32:25,760 --> 00:32:28,760
Speaker 4: She's like, she's like crying and the water's like, can

746
00:32:28,800 --> 00:32:32,000
Speaker 4: I offer you some wine yet?

747
00:32:32,080 --> 00:32:35,120
Speaker 3: Yeah? Have you heard about our new specials?

748
00:32:36,120 --> 00:32:36,360
Speaker 4: No?

749
00:32:37,000 --> 00:32:37,680
Speaker 1: I don't want to.

750
00:32:37,880 --> 00:32:40,120
Speaker 3: She confessed she knew that she was being a witch,

751
00:32:40,280 --> 00:32:42,400
Speaker 3: she couldn't help it, that she knew as she was wrong,

752
00:32:42,440 --> 00:32:45,200
Speaker 3: and that she felt horrible, but she felt pressure to succeed.

753
00:32:45,360 --> 00:32:46,200
Speaker 1: That she felt that.

754
00:32:46,160 --> 00:32:49,200
Speaker 3: She's getting old and feels horrible because supposedly I'm in

755
00:32:49,280 --> 00:32:51,840
Speaker 3: my prime while she's past hers. Ridiculous by the way,

756
00:32:51,920 --> 00:32:54,160
Speaker 3: she told me, she felt guilty that I'm younger than

757
00:32:54,160 --> 00:32:56,120
Speaker 3: her but taking care of her, and that she's older

758
00:32:56,160 --> 00:32:58,800
Speaker 3: and she could be the one caring for me, and

759
00:32:58,840 --> 00:33:01,719
Speaker 3: that since she's suppose going downhill, I won't find her

760
00:33:01,720 --> 00:33:03,680
Speaker 3: attractive anymore and we'll cheat on her.

761
00:33:04,040 --> 00:33:06,520
Speaker 4: Yeah, she's insecure and she's lashing out and taking it

762
00:33:06,560 --> 00:33:09,600
Speaker 4: out on you so that you feel more insecure. Yes,

763
00:33:09,920 --> 00:33:15,040
Speaker 4: it's classic, classic insecure relationship tactics. You make your partner

764
00:33:15,200 --> 00:33:19,520
Speaker 4: feel bad about themselves so that they by comparison, like

765
00:33:19,560 --> 00:33:22,920
Speaker 4: think you were better and like you're you. You know,

766
00:33:22,960 --> 00:33:24,760
Speaker 4: you don't even deserve them, so like why would I

767
00:33:24,800 --> 00:33:25,280
Speaker 4: leave them?

768
00:33:25,440 --> 00:33:27,800
Speaker 1: And you know what, Sophia, the levels of I don't

769
00:33:27,880 --> 00:33:32,600
Speaker 1: like that are high. Bad bad bad bad.

770
00:33:32,640 --> 00:33:35,440
Speaker 4: Talk about your insecurities. Don't take them out on your partner.

771
00:33:35,880 --> 00:33:37,760
Speaker 1: Let's talk about it, talk about it.

772
00:33:37,800 --> 00:33:40,440
Speaker 3: All these things, she said, made her feel really insecure,

773
00:33:40,560 --> 00:33:42,800
Speaker 3: and that she just lashed out. Was angry at me

774
00:33:43,000 --> 00:33:45,840
Speaker 3: for imaginary things I might do in some pretend future

775
00:33:45,840 --> 00:33:46,960
Speaker 3: where I stopped loving her.

776
00:33:47,080 --> 00:33:47,480
Speaker 1: Oh man.

777
00:33:47,640 --> 00:33:51,400
Speaker 3: She said that she felt her words hopelessly outclassed by

778
00:33:51,440 --> 00:33:54,440
Speaker 3: my accomplishments and that it hurt her self esteem to

779
00:33:54,440 --> 00:33:56,920
Speaker 3: be so reliant on me. This is the one time

780
00:33:56,960 --> 00:33:59,840
Speaker 3: I agreed with her early teasing and said being community

781
00:33:59,840 --> 00:34:02,600
Speaker 3: called teacher isn't that amazing, and that she's only thirty

782
00:34:02,600 --> 00:34:05,880
Speaker 3: three and has lots of life left and her story

783
00:34:05,960 --> 00:34:07,600
Speaker 3: isn't yet a third written.

784
00:34:07,800 --> 00:34:09,239
Speaker 1: There were still unwritten.

785
00:34:11,000 --> 00:34:11,400
Speaker 4: Yeah.

786
00:34:11,480 --> 00:34:13,879
Speaker 3: She confessed that her younger brother he's also my age,

787
00:34:13,920 --> 00:34:16,200
Speaker 3: maybe a couple of years older, also outperformed her in

788
00:34:16,200 --> 00:34:17,759
Speaker 3: school and it made her feel bad.

789
00:34:17,920 --> 00:34:20,359
Speaker 4: Her comparison is the thief of.

790
00:34:20,480 --> 00:34:24,759
Speaker 3: Joy, thief swiper nos swiping my joy. That is, her

791
00:34:24,800 --> 00:34:26,880
Speaker 3: parents tease her about it, and in some ways I

792
00:34:26,960 --> 00:34:30,320
Speaker 3: reminded her insecurity about being outdone by a younger sibling.

793
00:34:30,480 --> 00:34:32,960
Speaker 3: Side note, I hope she doesn't see me as a sibling. Hell,

794
00:34:33,120 --> 00:34:34,759
Speaker 3: get these washing machines out of here.

795
00:34:34,920 --> 00:34:36,120
Speaker 4: Yeah, I know you guys are bros.

796
00:34:36,280 --> 00:34:38,600
Speaker 1: Yeah come on, yeah right, nice dig.

797
00:34:38,880 --> 00:34:41,040
Speaker 3: She explained that when we're alone together, she can be

798
00:34:41,080 --> 00:34:43,319
Speaker 3: herself and that's when she loves life best. But when

799
00:34:43,360 --> 00:34:46,000
Speaker 3: we're with other people, especially her female friends, she feels

800
00:34:46,000 --> 00:34:47,320
Speaker 3: a huge pressure to show how.

801
00:34:47,200 --> 00:34:49,080
Speaker 1: Strong and how independent she is.

802
00:34:49,400 --> 00:34:51,439
Speaker 3: She promised me that she would never do it again,

803
00:34:51,480 --> 00:34:53,560
Speaker 3: and that if she did that, I should immediately tell

804
00:34:53,600 --> 00:34:54,719
Speaker 3: her to knock it off.

805
00:34:55,040 --> 00:34:56,279
Speaker 4: A great conversation.

806
00:34:56,560 --> 00:34:59,040
Speaker 3: We are making some progress here. Gotta give it to her.

807
00:34:59,080 --> 00:35:01,319
Speaker 3: She kind of emitted every time.

808
00:35:01,360 --> 00:35:06,400
Speaker 4: Absolutely really great. I mean, we're all human. We got bias, biases,

809
00:35:06,520 --> 00:35:09,960
Speaker 4: and insecurities, and sometimes we dike them out on other

810
00:35:10,000 --> 00:35:12,560
Speaker 4: people and it's just like all it's nice to be

811
00:35:12,640 --> 00:35:15,080
Speaker 4: with people that keep you in check. Yeah and say hey,

812
00:35:15,200 --> 00:35:16,600
Speaker 4: stop it, and then you go, oh my god, I

813
00:35:16,640 --> 00:35:18,359
Speaker 4: didn't even realize I was doing that. I'm so sorry.

814
00:35:18,480 --> 00:35:20,480
Speaker 3: Yeah, saying the quiet part out loud can can do

815
00:35:20,560 --> 00:35:21,360
Speaker 3: some magic something.

816
00:35:21,440 --> 00:35:25,000
Speaker 4: Yeah, like sometimes people really just don't even notice that

817
00:35:25,040 --> 00:35:25,960
Speaker 4: they're doing something.

818
00:35:26,440 --> 00:35:28,520
Speaker 3: Very true, very true. Sophia is killing it with the

819
00:35:28,560 --> 00:35:31,719
Speaker 3: advice that I can't even lie now. She also begged me,

820
00:35:31,880 --> 00:35:35,839
Speaker 3: absolutely begged me, with handwringing and everything, not to leave

821
00:35:35,880 --> 00:35:38,080
Speaker 3: her and that she would be better and ask me

822
00:35:38,120 --> 00:35:40,479
Speaker 3: for another chance, promising not to mess up again.

823
00:35:40,680 --> 00:35:41,800
Speaker 1: And now for the best part.

824
00:35:41,880 --> 00:35:44,720
Speaker 3: She explained that she poked fun at my non existent

825
00:35:44,760 --> 00:35:47,880
Speaker 3: stomach fat because she was insecure about the fact that

826
00:35:48,000 --> 00:35:50,399
Speaker 3: she herself had put on a few pounds the last

827
00:35:50,440 --> 00:35:53,120
Speaker 3: month or so. She was utterly distraught that I would

828
00:35:53,160 --> 00:35:55,520
Speaker 3: think she was ugly and a would not want to

829
00:35:55,520 --> 00:35:57,600
Speaker 3: sleep with there anymore and be cheat on.

830
00:35:57,920 --> 00:36:01,719
Speaker 4: Oh so sad, And that's her your own issues she

831
00:36:01,880 --> 00:36:04,120
Speaker 4: needs to deal with, not your problem.

832
00:36:04,120 --> 00:36:07,279
Speaker 1: Ope, this is true, dingus bought who is cheating? Trying

833
00:36:07,280 --> 00:36:07,839
Speaker 1: to trip it up?

834
00:36:08,239 --> 00:36:10,399
Speaker 3: Let's see question in the story there was no mention

835
00:36:10,480 --> 00:36:14,680
Speaker 3: of anyone cheating. Boom, all right, I see what you

836
00:36:14,719 --> 00:36:17,040
Speaker 3: did there. By the way, you can't trick me. There's

837
00:36:17,080 --> 00:36:21,080
Speaker 3: no way, Sophia, me Riley, we're untrickable, untrickable, and guess

838
00:36:21,120 --> 00:36:23,600
Speaker 3: what because if you haven't gone to Spotify, Apple or

839
00:36:23,640 --> 00:36:26,040
Speaker 3: iHeart searched. Okay, story time and listen to all two

840
00:36:26,040 --> 00:36:28,880
Speaker 3: thousand episodes that you can binge, I mean, NonStop content

841
00:36:28,960 --> 00:36:30,760
Speaker 3: to fill your work day while you're doing the dishes

842
00:36:30,800 --> 00:36:32,200
Speaker 3: whatever for your listening pleasure.

843
00:36:32,360 --> 00:36:34,400
Speaker 1: If you want to lie, and so.

844
00:36:34,440 --> 00:36:37,120
Speaker 3: You've listened to every episode and I don't believe you, well,

845
00:36:37,160 --> 00:36:38,440
Speaker 3: you haven't done what I just told you to do.

846
00:36:38,560 --> 00:36:39,080
Speaker 4: It's true.

847
00:36:39,280 --> 00:36:41,440
Speaker 1: Go look up the podcast and start listening to it. Guys.

848
00:36:41,440 --> 00:36:46,400
Speaker 4: Oh go, don't don't make him do it. I'm I'm

849
00:36:46,440 --> 00:36:49,600
Speaker 4: gonna kill you will. This is a hostage situation.

850
00:36:49,680 --> 00:36:54,080
Speaker 3: This is or else I will draw smiley face on

851
00:36:54,239 --> 00:36:56,960
Speaker 3: your smiley face, so you watch out. Okay, now let's

852
00:36:56,960 --> 00:36:58,799
Speaker 3: get into the last part of the story. So it

853
00:36:58,880 --> 00:37:00,000
Speaker 3: turns out she's pregnant.

854
00:37:00,200 --> 00:37:04,920
Speaker 4: What hormones too? Also maybe, but also I think this

855
00:37:05,080 --> 00:37:06,239
Speaker 4: was kind of going on the whole time.

856
00:37:06,280 --> 00:37:08,320
Speaker 1: Probably. Wow, that's really sexist, Sophia.

857
00:37:08,719 --> 00:37:09,800
Speaker 4: No, it's just bodily.

858
00:37:09,960 --> 00:37:10,440
Speaker 1: I don't know that.

859
00:37:11,480 --> 00:37:13,600
Speaker 4: You can't, Johnny. That's just how mormones work. Man.

860
00:37:14,040 --> 00:37:17,000
Speaker 6: So whenever I'm saying you're getting too hormonal, it's a problem.

861
00:37:17,080 --> 00:37:19,840
Speaker 1: When have you ever said that being too hormonal. Is

862
00:37:19,840 --> 00:37:21,480
Speaker 1: it a problem though, we're about that problem?

863
00:37:21,760 --> 00:37:25,160
Speaker 5: Oh yep, we're bros, right Riley.

864
00:37:26,239 --> 00:37:30,760
Speaker 1: You know it comes with that. She was a sweet

865
00:37:30,880 --> 00:37:31,160
Speaker 1: and girl.

866
00:37:31,719 --> 00:37:32,360
Speaker 4: I'm good guys.

867
00:37:32,880 --> 00:37:34,320
Speaker 1: One free shot, one free shot.

868
00:37:36,680 --> 00:37:42,440
Speaker 3: Oh you know, get ready world, give me a.

869
00:37:43,120 --> 00:37:45,239
Speaker 1: So it turns out she's pregnant and I'm gonna be

870
00:37:45,280 --> 00:37:46,560
Speaker 1: a dad. She says.

871
00:37:46,560 --> 00:37:49,160
Speaker 3: She's been irritable and judgy and a total witch lately

872
00:37:49,200 --> 00:37:51,080
Speaker 3: because of hormones. And on top of all of that,

873
00:37:51,200 --> 00:37:53,480
Speaker 3: she feared that I'd lose interest in her if I

874
00:37:53,480 --> 00:37:55,600
Speaker 3: couldn't have spicy sleep with her for several months while

875
00:37:55,600 --> 00:37:56,120
Speaker 3: he's pregnant.

876
00:37:56,280 --> 00:37:59,160
Speaker 1: Heck, I don't mind. Well, gladly wait, she says. She'll

877
00:37:59,200 --> 00:38:01,320
Speaker 1: happily give oral in the meantime.

878
00:38:02,280 --> 00:38:06,680
Speaker 3: There's some details for you, which is pretty awesome. So

879
00:38:07,600 --> 00:38:14,319
Speaker 3: happy ending and happy for Ama and God bless America.

880
00:38:14,640 --> 00:38:17,560
Speaker 6: Also low key with how this guy talks besides him

881
00:38:17,560 --> 00:38:20,839
Speaker 6: being a yoga teacher. Yes, yeah, you know, someone's gonna

882
00:38:20,840 --> 00:38:22,759
Speaker 6: hate me after I say this. But she's being she's

883
00:38:22,760 --> 00:38:25,800
Speaker 6: a feminist and she's like I am independent, which is great, awesome,

884
00:38:25,840 --> 00:38:28,160
Speaker 6: but it's bothering her because she is with someone that

885
00:38:28,239 --> 00:38:30,720
Speaker 6: she's relying on. She is dependent and this guy seems

886
00:38:30,719 --> 00:38:32,920
Speaker 6: to be a very like America kind of guy.

887
00:38:33,120 --> 00:38:36,680
Speaker 4: What because he said happy for I don't know. Yeah,

888
00:38:36,760 --> 00:38:37,560
Speaker 4: I don't know.

889
00:38:37,760 --> 00:38:40,360
Speaker 1: He was like, I'm so totally happy to be hitting that.

890
00:38:40,719 --> 00:38:42,799
Speaker 4: Well, I think it's because he's happy it.

891
00:38:42,719 --> 00:38:43,360
Speaker 1: Okay, you know what.

892
00:38:43,680 --> 00:38:46,520
Speaker 6: It didn't work, editors, take it out, keep it in,

893
00:38:46,719 --> 00:38:47,239
Speaker 6: keep it in.

894
00:38:48,560 --> 00:38:51,040
Speaker 1: Yeah, anything else you want to share with the classroom?

895
00:38:51,160 --> 00:38:53,080
Speaker 4: No, I just thought you had something else to share.

896
00:38:53,360 --> 00:38:58,600
Speaker 1: I did not. I had a question for Riley. I

897
00:38:58,680 --> 00:39:00,520
Speaker 1: love that. Sobia's gona ask me you have anything else?

898
00:39:00,560 --> 00:39:04,040
Speaker 1: He just goes, ah, that's.

899
00:39:03,960 --> 00:39:05,040
Speaker 4: The end of that story.

900
00:39:05,320 --> 00:39:07,600
Speaker 3: Yes, that's the end of the story. And we're going

901
00:39:07,680 --> 00:39:09,919
Speaker 3: to do something crazy. When I finished counting down from three,

902
00:39:10,000 --> 00:39:12,920
Speaker 3: we're going to completely change clothes and maybe people, and

903
00:39:12,920 --> 00:39:13,800
Speaker 3: it's going to be crazy.

904
00:39:13,840 --> 00:39:14,680
Speaker 1: Are you ready? Everyone?

905
00:39:15,239 --> 00:39:15,479
Speaker 4: One?

906
00:39:16,239 --> 00:39:20,360
Speaker 1: Two, three, and we're back in different clothes. Well, you

907
00:39:20,400 --> 00:39:21,200
Speaker 1: don't look at that.

908
00:39:21,320 --> 00:39:22,320
Speaker 4: Just as we promise.

909
00:39:22,520 --> 00:39:24,000
Speaker 1: Yes, let's get into it.

910
00:39:24,160 --> 00:39:26,720
Speaker 4: My husband wants me to be a stay at home mom.

911
00:39:27,200 --> 00:39:29,000
Speaker 4: There's no way i'd agree.

912
00:39:29,239 --> 00:39:31,360
Speaker 1: You're about to be a stay at home as gotcha?

913
00:39:31,360 --> 00:39:35,080
Speaker 4: Oh you can say also, you should stay away.

914
00:39:34,840 --> 00:39:36,920
Speaker 1: From me ooh, I didn't think of that.

915
00:39:37,920 --> 00:39:40,880
Speaker 4: For anonymity, I can't go into details. But my husband,

916
00:39:40,880 --> 00:39:44,400
Speaker 4: thirty four male, has developed something in it that's well

917
00:39:44,480 --> 00:39:46,319
Speaker 4: known and it made him rich.

918
00:39:46,800 --> 00:39:49,080
Speaker 1: Niche okay, niche industry.

919
00:39:49,680 --> 00:39:52,279
Speaker 4: I thirty eight female, am a chef and I make

920
00:39:52,360 --> 00:39:55,560
Speaker 4: probably one one hundredth of what he does. It doesn't

921
00:39:55,600 --> 00:39:57,600
Speaker 4: matter for me, however, because I love my job.

922
00:39:57,760 --> 00:40:01,480
Speaker 1: Wait what he makes one hundred times more than she does? Yeah,

923
00:40:02,320 --> 00:40:03,200
Speaker 1: what are you doing?

924
00:40:03,800 --> 00:40:05,319
Speaker 4: Well, she's a chef and he's rich.

925
00:40:05,400 --> 00:40:05,600
Speaker 5: Rich.

926
00:40:05,760 --> 00:40:08,240
Speaker 4: Doesn't matter for me, however, because I love my job.

927
00:40:08,440 --> 00:40:10,920
Speaker 4: We have a great life together. We had our first child,

928
00:40:10,960 --> 00:40:13,520
Speaker 4: a baby girl, three years ago, and our twin boys

929
00:40:13,600 --> 00:40:15,759
Speaker 4: are nine months old. By the way, this comes from

930
00:40:15,840 --> 00:40:20,480
Speaker 4: throwingal and if you want to spend your own stories,

931
00:40:20,480 --> 00:40:22,480
Speaker 4: go to the r slash okay storytime separate it.

932
00:40:22,719 --> 00:40:22,799
Speaker 1: So.

933
00:40:23,280 --> 00:40:25,520
Speaker 4: I have a few months left on my maternity leave,

934
00:40:25,600 --> 00:40:27,759
Speaker 4: and with the country closing up again because of the

935
00:40:27,800 --> 00:40:31,600
Speaker 4: new omicron isn't it omnikron anyway, I started getting worried

936
00:40:31,719 --> 00:40:34,080
Speaker 4: that my workplace won't take me back. I voiced my

937
00:40:34,200 --> 00:40:36,520
Speaker 4: borries to my husband a couple of days ago, and

938
00:40:36,600 --> 00:40:39,560
Speaker 4: he just shrugged, said, not like we needed the money.

939
00:40:40,800 --> 00:40:45,880
Speaker 1: You're completely missing the points. It's gone points.

940
00:40:47,160 --> 00:40:49,480
Speaker 4: I was confused and told them, but I knew that

941
00:40:49,640 --> 00:40:52,040
Speaker 4: it wasn't about the money. He just shrugged. I was

942
00:40:52,080 --> 00:40:54,160
Speaker 4: a bit annoyed, to be honest, because I thought he

943
00:40:54,200 --> 00:40:55,960
Speaker 4: didn't think it a big deal that I might be

944
00:40:56,000 --> 00:40:58,440
Speaker 4: out of work. Yesterday, I was still thinking about it,

945
00:40:58,480 --> 00:41:01,120
Speaker 4: so I decided to talk to him. He was confused

946
00:41:01,120 --> 00:41:02,960
Speaker 4: and told me that I should instead be happy that

947
00:41:03,000 --> 00:41:05,719
Speaker 4: I could spend more time with my babies. And he

948
00:41:05,800 --> 00:41:08,719
Speaker 4: asked me why I insisted on working when we have

949
00:41:08,880 --> 00:41:11,919
Speaker 4: three small children and he made enough money for both

950
00:41:11,960 --> 00:41:15,000
Speaker 4: of us. Because she wants to have a fulfilling.

951
00:41:14,600 --> 00:41:17,279
Speaker 3: Career, because she wants to live her life how she

952
00:41:17,440 --> 00:41:17,920
Speaker 3: wants to.

953
00:41:18,200 --> 00:41:20,080
Speaker 1: This is silly, very silly.

954
00:41:20,160 --> 00:41:23,000
Speaker 4: He didn't like me working four to five evenings a week,

955
00:41:23,280 --> 00:41:25,520
Speaker 4: including one to two weekends a month. I told him

956
00:41:25,520 --> 00:41:27,560
Speaker 4: that I love my job and that I'm good at it.

957
00:41:27,719 --> 00:41:30,040
Speaker 4: I've been doing it for almost twenty years now, and

958
00:41:30,080 --> 00:41:31,920
Speaker 4: the thought of not doing anything for the rest of

959
00:41:31,920 --> 00:41:35,040
Speaker 4: my life is suffocating. He was visibly upset by then,

960
00:41:35,160 --> 00:41:38,080
Speaker 4: and he accused, what is it, sorry, I was making

961
00:41:38,080 --> 00:41:39,319
Speaker 4: myself lap.

962
00:41:40,600 --> 00:41:42,759
Speaker 5: Okay, okay, who do you want to share with your

963
00:41:42,760 --> 00:41:46,160
Speaker 5: class or okay, you find out okay.

964
00:41:47,120 --> 00:41:49,759
Speaker 4: He was visibly upset by then, and he accused me

965
00:41:49,840 --> 00:41:52,279
Speaker 4: of loving my job more than my babies and him.

966
00:41:52,520 --> 00:41:54,520
Speaker 4: He said I could always cook at home for the family,

967
00:41:54,600 --> 00:41:57,719
Speaker 4: and if I was worried I would lose my independence,

968
00:41:58,000 --> 00:42:00,160
Speaker 4: he could transfer the same amount I earned from my

969
00:42:00,239 --> 00:42:01,920
Speaker 4: job to my private account monthly.

970
00:42:02,160 --> 00:42:07,520
Speaker 1: This man is just dude. I don't at all, not

971
00:42:07,719 --> 00:42:08,200
Speaker 1: at all.

972
00:42:08,960 --> 00:42:09,840
Speaker 4: You don't get anything.

973
00:42:10,080 --> 00:42:11,480
Speaker 1: Oh, wow, you want to cook for other people and

974
00:42:11,520 --> 00:42:12,040
Speaker 1: not us.

975
00:42:12,400 --> 00:42:14,919
Speaker 4: He's like, why are you? Yeah, why are you being

976
00:42:14,960 --> 00:42:18,520
Speaker 4: a chef for others and you can't even cook NonStop

977
00:42:18,560 --> 00:42:18,880
Speaker 4: for us?

978
00:42:18,960 --> 00:42:19,160
Speaker 6: Oh?

979
00:42:19,239 --> 00:42:23,560
Speaker 3: I didn't know you liked hoarding food away from your family.

980
00:42:24,000 --> 00:42:26,160
Speaker 1: I didn't know. That's like what you were like freaking

981
00:42:26,239 --> 00:42:28,560
Speaker 1: into what am I not enough to cook for? Might

982
00:42:28,600 --> 00:42:29,239
Speaker 1: not have to cook for?

983
00:42:29,360 --> 00:42:32,040
Speaker 4: Huh? I started crying, and he kissed and hugged me

984
00:42:32,160 --> 00:42:34,000
Speaker 4: and told me that he loved me, but he had

985
00:42:34,040 --> 00:42:36,319
Speaker 4: been thinking about this since our girl was born. He

986
00:42:36,360 --> 00:42:38,560
Speaker 4: didn't like me coming home late at night, so I

987
00:42:38,640 --> 00:42:41,800
Speaker 4: needed a choose between my job or being a family.

988
00:42:42,239 --> 00:42:45,200
Speaker 4: I was startled. Did he mean it as an ultimatum?

989
00:42:45,440 --> 00:42:47,880
Speaker 4: He did he actually wants me to be a housewife

990
00:42:48,000 --> 00:42:49,640
Speaker 4: or we go our separate way?

991
00:42:49,840 --> 00:42:52,319
Speaker 1: Oh? Yike, no.

992
00:42:54,160 --> 00:42:57,840
Speaker 6: More than you, dude, or a hundred times one hundred

993
00:42:57,880 --> 00:42:58,600
Speaker 6: times more than you.

994
00:42:58,680 --> 00:43:02,960
Speaker 4: And that's just so so messed up. I mean, like,

995
00:43:03,239 --> 00:43:06,640
Speaker 4: I'm sorry. Being a stay at home parent is something

996
00:43:06,680 --> 00:43:10,720
Speaker 4: that you should agree upon as partners, not just something

997
00:43:10,719 --> 00:43:12,040
Speaker 4: that you force on someone.

998
00:43:12,200 --> 00:43:15,839
Speaker 3: Yes, could Sophia in an alternate universe he had been like, hey, like,

999
00:43:16,520 --> 00:43:19,440
Speaker 3: would you know you staying home with the kids be

1000
00:43:19,480 --> 00:43:20,400
Speaker 3: something you would enjoy?

1001
00:43:20,480 --> 00:43:22,240
Speaker 1: Is that something that fulfills you or whatever?

1002
00:43:22,440 --> 00:43:24,520
Speaker 3: That's kind of like what I would you know, Oh,

1003
00:43:24,640 --> 00:43:26,520
Speaker 3: in a partner, but of course you have to live

1004
00:43:26,520 --> 00:43:26,879
Speaker 3: your life.

1005
00:43:26,920 --> 00:43:29,600
Speaker 1: Is that something interested in? Is this an acceptable way?

1006
00:43:29,840 --> 00:43:32,600
Speaker 4: That is an accept to address it? That is an

1007
00:43:32,640 --> 00:43:33,439
Speaker 4: acceptable way?

1008
00:43:33,600 --> 00:43:35,319
Speaker 1: But is this an acceptable way?

1009
00:43:35,640 --> 00:43:39,279
Speaker 4: Isn't an acceptable way? Not at all. I went to

1010
00:43:39,320 --> 00:43:41,960
Speaker 4: my mom's place first thing this morning. She listened to

1011
00:43:42,040 --> 00:43:44,760
Speaker 4: me talking and crying, but when I finished, she wasn't

1012
00:43:44,840 --> 00:43:48,000
Speaker 4: indignant on my behalf like I expected. She was silent

1013
00:43:48,040 --> 00:43:49,759
Speaker 4: for a while, and then she asked me to think

1014
00:43:49,800 --> 00:43:53,080
Speaker 4: carefully about my next move. If we got divorced, I'd

1015
00:43:53,120 --> 00:43:55,200
Speaker 4: need to think about my babies. I would never be

1016
00:43:55,239 --> 00:43:57,200
Speaker 4: able to give them a life their dad is giving them,

1017
00:43:57,239 --> 00:43:59,680
Speaker 4: and I might lose them because of it. Is it

1018
00:43:59,680 --> 00:44:02,839
Speaker 4: where it to change their lives so drastically and have

1019
00:44:02,880 --> 00:44:05,279
Speaker 4: them live in two separate houses? All that for a

1020
00:44:05,400 --> 00:44:07,759
Speaker 4: job I worked my whole adult life, and I just

1021
00:44:07,800 --> 00:44:10,560
Speaker 4: could see this as an early retirement. Many people dreamed

1022
00:44:10,560 --> 00:44:13,720
Speaker 4: of this. Why couldn't I enjoy it? I wasn't expecting

1023
00:44:13,760 --> 00:44:16,160
Speaker 4: my mom to say these things. She's always been this strong,

1024
00:44:16,280 --> 00:44:19,000
Speaker 4: independent woman who raised us to be independent and taught

1025
00:44:19,000 --> 00:44:21,080
Speaker 4: me to never rely one hundred percent on anyone other

1026
00:44:21,120 --> 00:44:23,560
Speaker 4: than myself. Hearing her say all of that made me

1027
00:44:23,680 --> 00:44:26,640
Speaker 4: question my feelings before I met her, I was totally

1028
00:44:26,680 --> 00:44:28,080
Speaker 4: sure before you met your.

1029
00:44:27,920 --> 00:44:37,480
Speaker 5: Mom, Yeah, I think you're right right, good cats, good

1030
00:44:37,520 --> 00:44:38,839
Speaker 5: catch my mom.

1031
00:44:38,880 --> 00:44:41,879
Speaker 1: Before I met my mom, I met my own mom.

1032
00:44:42,080 --> 00:44:44,839
Speaker 1: I mean, at one point, you do meet your mom? Yeah,

1033
00:44:44,920 --> 00:44:49,080
Speaker 1: consciously true? Yeah, I met my lady.

1034
00:44:48,960 --> 00:44:51,319
Speaker 4: It's my mom. Before I met up with her, I

1035
00:44:51,400 --> 00:44:54,480
Speaker 4: was totally sure I was right being hurt and angry.

1036
00:44:54,520 --> 00:44:56,920
Speaker 4: But now I think maybe I'm overreacting and that my

1037
00:44:57,040 --> 00:45:00,600
Speaker 4: husband's request wasn't that unreasonable. But if that it's the case,

1038
00:45:00,719 --> 00:45:02,960
Speaker 4: why do I feel like my heart is swollen in

1039
00:45:03,080 --> 00:45:05,680
Speaker 4: my throat. Why does it feel like he made this

1040
00:45:05,800 --> 00:45:09,080
Speaker 4: ultimatum because he knew he had power and he's using it.

1041
00:45:09,320 --> 00:45:12,600
Speaker 4: Throw any suggestion or advice my way, and please be honest,

1042
00:45:12,760 --> 00:45:15,040
Speaker 4: because I feel I'm wronged here and I'm having a

1043
00:45:15,080 --> 00:45:18,719
Speaker 4: hard time thinking from my husband's perspective. And there is

1044
00:45:18,760 --> 00:45:20,680
Speaker 4: an update. But Riley's got a question.

1045
00:45:20,880 --> 00:45:23,399
Speaker 6: Yes, more like advice. That's what we're gonna do. I'm

1046
00:45:23,400 --> 00:45:25,839
Speaker 6: gonna sit, He'll be down. Hey, I'll be the stay

1047
00:45:25,880 --> 00:45:27,480
Speaker 6: at home wife. But this is what I want, my

1048
00:45:27,520 --> 00:45:30,440
Speaker 6: own cooking show and a babysitter. I'm not gonna stop

1049
00:45:30,440 --> 00:45:32,719
Speaker 6: cooking because you want me to. And I think I

1050
00:45:32,719 --> 00:45:35,960
Speaker 6: would use this for something else. Boom, use that against

1051
00:45:35,960 --> 00:45:38,720
Speaker 6: some scale up and then be, you know, one hundred

1052
00:45:38,719 --> 00:45:41,040
Speaker 6: ex him, have your own like you know, dog food

1053
00:45:41,080 --> 00:45:44,000
Speaker 6: company or whatever like that one person did and that

1054
00:45:44,040 --> 00:45:44,760
Speaker 6: could be you.

1055
00:45:44,760 --> 00:45:49,439
Speaker 4: No, it's it's incredibly frustrating because some people genuinely don't

1056
00:45:49,440 --> 00:45:51,360
Speaker 4: want to have a job. They're like, ah, job is

1057
00:45:51,520 --> 00:45:54,359
Speaker 4: just boring. I don't like it. I hate my job.

1058
00:45:54,640 --> 00:45:57,080
Speaker 4: It's just some way to get money. And some people

1059
00:45:57,200 --> 00:46:00,279
Speaker 4: it's a vocation, it's something that they find a lot

1060
00:46:00,320 --> 00:46:03,200
Speaker 4: of like, they have a lot of passion for and

1061
00:46:03,239 --> 00:46:06,600
Speaker 4: it gives them, you know, a kind of like meaning

1062
00:46:06,640 --> 00:46:09,759
Speaker 4: in their life. And either is okay as long as

1063
00:46:09,800 --> 00:46:11,759
Speaker 4: you get to make that choice. And the reason that

1064
00:46:11,760 --> 00:46:13,840
Speaker 4: you're upset is because he's taking away that choice.

1065
00:46:13,920 --> 00:46:16,400
Speaker 3: Yes, he is controlling. At the end of the day,

1066
00:46:16,719 --> 00:46:19,960
Speaker 3: she does not have to explain why that's what you.

1067
00:46:20,160 --> 00:46:23,160
Speaker 3: Of course like communicating you know how you feel is good.

1068
00:46:23,160 --> 00:46:26,520
Speaker 3: But like I say that meaning, she is one thousand

1069
00:46:26,600 --> 00:46:29,680
Speaker 3: percent fully entitled to live her life the way she wants.

1070
00:46:29,719 --> 00:46:32,359
Speaker 3: She's not neglecting the children, she's not doing anything bad

1071
00:46:32,400 --> 00:46:35,839
Speaker 3: to the relationship. This is the husband completely controlling her

1072
00:46:36,080 --> 00:46:37,680
Speaker 3: and she does.

1073
00:46:37,520 --> 00:46:38,480
Speaker 1: Not deserve that.

1074
00:46:38,920 --> 00:46:42,120
Speaker 4: I agree. I agree. And it's weird that your mom

1075
00:46:42,160 --> 00:46:43,279
Speaker 4: is not being supportive of you.

1076
00:46:43,560 --> 00:46:46,799
Speaker 1: Yeah, dude, el mom Elle mom el freakin' mom. Bro.

1077
00:46:47,280 --> 00:46:48,280
Speaker 4: But there is an update.

1078
00:46:48,440 --> 00:46:49,680
Speaker 1: This is Cowboy.

1079
00:46:49,400 --> 00:46:52,840
Speaker 3: Sam and this is Yeehaw John, And we've lastowed in

1080
00:46:53,040 --> 00:46:56,920
Speaker 3: some amazing stories for you all the Okay Storytime podcasts.

1081
00:46:56,920 --> 00:46:59,280
Speaker 3: But before that we got to wrangle a quick little

1082
00:46:59,320 --> 00:47:02,040
Speaker 3: tom minute out break from those bucking sponsors.

1083
00:47:02,080 --> 00:47:04,080
Speaker 2: We bucking love so much, and they paid us the

1084
00:47:04,080 --> 00:47:05,760
Speaker 2: bucks to help this show stay alive.

1085
00:47:06,520 --> 00:47:11,040
Speaker 4: Oh boie, I don't work four to five days plus weekends.

1086
00:47:11,160 --> 00:47:13,439
Speaker 4: I work thirty five to forty five hours a week

1087
00:47:13,440 --> 00:47:16,200
Speaker 4: in total, and sometimes it's during the weekend. That is

1088
00:47:16,280 --> 00:47:19,680
Speaker 4: already such a small amount of hours. So it's clearly

1089
00:47:19,960 --> 00:47:22,600
Speaker 4: like not the case at all that OPI is neglecting

1090
00:47:22,600 --> 00:47:23,080
Speaker 4: her kids.

1091
00:47:23,160 --> 00:47:25,880
Speaker 3: Yeah, and again, even if it is more, it's like, listen,

1092
00:47:25,960 --> 00:47:28,759
Speaker 3: you got a bajillion dollars like this is. Don't you

1093
00:47:28,760 --> 00:47:31,040
Speaker 3: want to see your wife happy and explore what she

1094
00:47:31,160 --> 00:47:32,080
Speaker 3: enjoys in her.

1095
00:47:32,000 --> 00:47:34,279
Speaker 4: Life exactly, But the fact that like, yeah, I mean,

1096
00:47:34,320 --> 00:47:36,319
Speaker 4: even if it was more, yeah, I'm in fact that

1097
00:47:36,440 --> 00:47:39,600
Speaker 4: it's this amount, and he's still complaining and saying, oh,

1098
00:47:39,640 --> 00:47:41,719
Speaker 4: I want an ultimatum. You know that you can't do

1099
00:47:41,800 --> 00:47:44,320
Speaker 4: this anymore. Staying at home as a mom isn't normal.

1100
00:47:44,320 --> 00:47:46,440
Speaker 4: In my country. Daycare is free and we don't have

1101
00:47:46,480 --> 00:47:48,440
Speaker 4: a nanny. I'm saying this because I want you to

1102
00:47:48,520 --> 00:47:51,920
Speaker 4: understand why I was taken aback by this whole situation.

1103
00:47:52,080 --> 00:47:54,680
Speaker 4: I'm not trying to be disrespectful to stay at home mom's.

1104
00:47:54,760 --> 00:47:57,000
Speaker 4: You can't get so custodied just because of his wealth

1105
00:47:57,080 --> 00:47:59,520
Speaker 4: or because of my work hours. It doesn't work like this,

1106
00:47:59,640 --> 00:48:02,840
Speaker 4: yere thank goodness. But I'm thankful for those who express

1107
00:48:02,840 --> 00:48:04,680
Speaker 4: to worry about that, because I know that is a

1108
00:48:04,680 --> 00:48:07,279
Speaker 4: sad reality in other parts of the world. So to

1109
00:48:07,320 --> 00:48:09,840
Speaker 4: the updates, I have had long talks with my husband

1110
00:48:09,880 --> 00:48:12,600
Speaker 4: about all that happened, trying to understand his point of view.

1111
00:48:12,680 --> 00:48:14,480
Speaker 4: I have told him that I can't see myself as

1112
00:48:14,520 --> 00:48:16,839
Speaker 4: a housewife ever, but that I am willing to start

1113
00:48:16,840 --> 00:48:19,759
Speaker 4: looking for jobs with better hours, or that I can

1114
00:48:19,840 --> 00:48:22,920
Speaker 4: finally start my own restaurant. I mean, yeah, if I

1115
00:48:23,040 --> 00:48:25,800
Speaker 4: was this husband, I'd be like, oh, my wife wants

1116
00:48:25,840 --> 00:48:29,719
Speaker 4: to be a chef. I'm going to buy you a restaurant. Yes, like,

1117
00:48:29,880 --> 00:48:32,040
Speaker 4: use all that money that you got, let her be

1118
00:48:32,120 --> 00:48:34,600
Speaker 4: a cook full time man, Because.

1119
00:48:34,239 --> 00:48:36,160
Speaker 1: You know what, so, if you're not buying a restaurant,

1120
00:48:36,200 --> 00:48:38,400
Speaker 1: you're buying your partners some happiness.

1121
00:48:38,680 --> 00:48:41,040
Speaker 4: Not that you're going to say you're buying your partner's.

1122
00:48:40,680 --> 00:48:42,200
Speaker 1: Love, incorrect.

1123
00:48:42,920 --> 00:48:45,600
Speaker 4: I could start searching for a location in office buildings

1124
00:48:45,640 --> 00:48:47,319
Speaker 4: and set up a lunch spot so then I don't

1125
00:48:47,320 --> 00:48:49,960
Speaker 4: need to work evenings and weekends. He didn't seem happy

1126
00:48:50,000 --> 00:48:52,520
Speaker 4: at all with that suggestion. He asked me why I'm

1127
00:48:52,560 --> 00:48:55,120
Speaker 4: so insistent on going back to work. He said these

1128
00:48:55,200 --> 00:48:57,640
Speaker 4: last months have been the happiest of his life, coming

1129
00:48:57,680 --> 00:48:59,560
Speaker 4: home from work every day to his family, and that

1130
00:48:59,600 --> 00:49:01,000
Speaker 4: he thought I was happy too.

1131
00:49:01,320 --> 00:49:05,160
Speaker 1: Did you literally like, oh this is this is what

1132
00:49:05,239 --> 00:49:05,560
Speaker 1: you did?

1133
00:49:05,600 --> 00:49:07,400
Speaker 3: This is oh yeah, yeah, this dude, this is this

1134
00:49:07,480 --> 00:49:10,279
Speaker 3: is drinking so much silly juice the other day.

1135
00:49:10,360 --> 00:49:13,000
Speaker 1: She got so silly and kooky. It was crazy.

1136
00:49:13,239 --> 00:49:14,000
Speaker 4: It was just weird.

1137
00:49:15,120 --> 00:49:16,279
Speaker 1: I thought I put it on you, though.

1138
00:49:16,360 --> 00:49:20,319
Speaker 4: I was really confused. I am. I love being with

1139
00:49:20,360 --> 00:49:22,880
Speaker 4: my babies all day. But just because I'm enjoying my

1140
00:49:23,000 --> 00:49:25,399
Speaker 4: maternity leave doesn't mean I don't want to go back

1141
00:49:25,440 --> 00:49:28,560
Speaker 4: to work. In fact, I'm enjoying every minute now because

1142
00:49:28,600 --> 00:49:31,200
Speaker 4: I know it's not permanent. We had a row. He

1143
00:49:31,239 --> 00:49:33,399
Speaker 4: said He's always felt that I'm scared of him making

1144
00:49:33,480 --> 00:49:36,000
Speaker 4: much more money and that I'm scared of being dependent

1145
00:49:36,080 --> 00:49:38,719
Speaker 4: on him. So if I'm insisting on working because I

1146
00:49:38,760 --> 00:49:40,560
Speaker 4: don't want to be a dependent, he could pay me

1147
00:49:40,680 --> 00:49:43,000
Speaker 4: ten times what I earned to stay home.

1148
00:49:43,040 --> 00:49:47,359
Speaker 1: So out of not getting it, he is not getting it.

1149
00:49:47,520 --> 00:49:51,400
Speaker 4: I started crying and told him I'm not going to

1150
00:49:51,400 --> 00:49:54,000
Speaker 4: be a housewife, and I don't accept ultimatums, so he

1151
00:49:54,040 --> 00:49:56,719
Speaker 4: should do what he feels is fit. Yes, he said

1152
00:49:56,760 --> 00:49:58,799
Speaker 4: he's tired of going around feeling that his wife is

1153
00:49:58,840 --> 00:50:01,960
Speaker 4: intimidated by a six And why are you intimidated by

1154
00:50:01,960 --> 00:50:03,160
Speaker 4: your wife having a career.

1155
00:50:03,360 --> 00:50:05,920
Speaker 1: Yes, he's doing this for both of us.

1156
00:50:06,200 --> 00:50:08,359
Speaker 4: I have to admit that I'm sometimes scared of him

1157
00:50:08,400 --> 00:50:11,000
Speaker 4: having more power than me. I mean, but that's exactly

1158
00:50:11,040 --> 00:50:15,319
Speaker 4: what he's doing. Yeah, he's asserting his power. Yeah, he said,

1159
00:50:15,360 --> 00:50:17,680
Speaker 4: it's all in my head. But really, would he ever

1160
00:50:17,840 --> 00:50:19,759
Speaker 4: dared to ask me to quit my job if he

1161
00:50:19,800 --> 00:50:21,759
Speaker 4: didn't feel he had the power to do it? Could

1162
00:50:21,840 --> 00:50:23,960
Speaker 4: I ask him to quit his job with the same ease.

1163
00:50:24,320 --> 00:50:27,040
Speaker 4: There's no denying the power dynamics in our relationship, and

1164
00:50:27,120 --> 00:50:29,400
Speaker 4: I have every right to be scared of it. So

1165
00:50:29,560 --> 00:50:32,120
Speaker 4: there was no progress, really, And no matter how much

1166
00:50:32,160 --> 00:50:35,040
Speaker 4: I explain myself, he doesn't seem to understand me, and

1167
00:50:35,080 --> 00:50:37,680
Speaker 4: probably he feels the same way about me. It feels

1168
00:50:37,719 --> 00:50:41,200
Speaker 4: like we're on different levels. I have suggested counseling.

1169
00:50:41,320 --> 00:50:41,760
Speaker 1: Good.

1170
00:50:41,800 --> 00:50:44,600
Speaker 4: Definitely need it, he said, I'll think about it now.

1171
00:50:44,600 --> 00:50:46,560
Speaker 4: We're just civil to each other, but we don't talk

1172
00:50:46,680 --> 00:50:49,040
Speaker 4: much and we haven't been intimate since I first brought

1173
00:50:49,120 --> 00:50:51,680
Speaker 4: up going back to work. I love him and miss him.

1174
00:50:51,880 --> 00:50:53,719
Speaker 4: I don't want it to end, but the ball is

1175
00:50:53,760 --> 00:50:56,400
Speaker 4: in his court now. My mom is very angry with me.

1176
00:50:56,600 --> 00:50:58,680
Speaker 4: We haven't spoken for a week. I don't know what

1177
00:50:58,760 --> 00:51:00,960
Speaker 4: to do with her either. I wonder if she was

1178
00:51:01,000 --> 00:51:04,360
Speaker 4: involved in that conversation, you know, like if maybe the

1179
00:51:04,520 --> 00:51:05,200
Speaker 4: husband had.

1180
00:51:05,040 --> 00:51:08,040
Speaker 1: Talked to her like plotting together kind of totally could

1181
00:51:08,080 --> 00:51:09,080
Speaker 1: be yeah.

1182
00:51:08,760 --> 00:51:11,319
Speaker 4: Because it seems like op he thinks for her mom.

1183
00:51:11,400 --> 00:51:14,319
Speaker 4: It's really out of character. So I don't know, Uh,

1184
00:51:16,280 --> 00:51:20,000
Speaker 4: I know her off hmmm. He's like, hey, I'll pay

1185
00:51:20,080 --> 00:51:22,920
Speaker 4: you to stay home if you get your daughter to

1186
00:51:23,120 --> 00:51:23,640
Speaker 4: stay home.

1187
00:51:24,000 --> 00:51:26,640
Speaker 1: How about how would you like to retire for five

1188
00:51:26,840 --> 00:51:27,600
Speaker 1: human lives?

1189
00:51:28,680 --> 00:51:28,919
Speaker 6: Mother?

1190
00:51:29,000 --> 00:51:30,080
Speaker 4: In a long time?

1191
00:51:30,440 --> 00:51:31,799
Speaker 1: Five human lives.

1192
00:51:31,560 --> 00:51:38,359
Speaker 4: You're retired every reincarnation exactly. Pretty nice, trust fun baby

1193
00:51:38,960 --> 00:51:42,120
Speaker 4: Day two. Thank you everyone for the support. I won't

1194
00:51:42,160 --> 00:51:44,399
Speaker 4: be able to make any more updates because you're only

1195
00:51:44,440 --> 00:51:47,080
Speaker 4: allowed one. This, however, is not a big update, so

1196
00:51:47,160 --> 00:51:49,240
Speaker 4: I thought I could just add it here. My husband

1197
00:51:49,280 --> 00:51:52,680
Speaker 4: and I talked yesterday for the first time in two weeks,

1198
00:51:52,719 --> 00:51:56,040
Speaker 4: and he was the one who initiated the conversation. Y'all

1199
00:51:56,080 --> 00:51:58,880
Speaker 4: haven't talked in two weeks. You'll have kids and you

1200
00:51:58,920 --> 00:52:01,840
Speaker 4: haven't talked in two weeks. How How I.

1201
00:52:02,040 --> 00:52:05,880
Speaker 3: Was communicate like, you know, just like Okay, baby needs food.

1202
00:52:06,080 --> 00:52:08,400
Speaker 1: Yeah, that's it. I bet you she's taking care of

1203
00:52:08,440 --> 00:52:08,719
Speaker 1: the kid.

1204
00:52:09,080 --> 00:52:09,560
Speaker 4: Probably.

1205
00:52:09,840 --> 00:52:10,240
Speaker 3: Yeah.

1206
00:52:10,320 --> 00:52:11,560
Speaker 4: He's probably not even doing.

1207
00:52:11,360 --> 00:52:13,840
Speaker 3: Anything and he's running around just typing on a computer

1208
00:52:13,920 --> 00:52:17,400
Speaker 3: like oh on my tea, Oh I made a hundred times.

1209
00:52:17,440 --> 00:52:19,200
Speaker 1: What do you make? Yeah, that's what he's doing.

1210
00:52:19,320 --> 00:52:22,760
Speaker 4: He's very seems like he is very thinks very highly

1211
00:52:22,760 --> 00:52:23,320
Speaker 4: of himself.

1212
00:52:23,600 --> 00:52:24,480
Speaker 1: Ooh yes.

1213
00:52:24,800 --> 00:52:27,479
Speaker 4: I told him that while I'm enjoying my maternity leave,

1214
00:52:27,640 --> 00:52:29,520
Speaker 4: the thought of it being the rest of my life

1215
00:52:29,880 --> 00:52:33,400
Speaker 4: suffocates me. I suffer from severe claustrophobia. I don't know

1216
00:52:33,440 --> 00:52:35,280
Speaker 4: if it has anything to do with this. I asked

1217
00:52:35,320 --> 00:52:37,920
Speaker 4: him why he's doing this. He knew my job was

1218
00:52:37,960 --> 00:52:40,560
Speaker 4: important to me, so why was he making this impossible

1219
00:52:40,600 --> 00:52:43,319
Speaker 4: request when he knew it would mean the end of us.

1220
00:52:43,520 --> 00:52:45,480
Speaker 4: If you're having second thoughts about our marriage and want

1221
00:52:45,480 --> 00:52:47,439
Speaker 4: it out, please just tell me the truth. He became

1222
00:52:47,520 --> 00:52:50,399
Speaker 4: very upset and accused me of trying to gaslight him.

1223
00:52:50,520 --> 00:52:53,080
Speaker 4: He said his reasons are legit, and there's nothing wrong

1224
00:52:53,120 --> 00:52:55,400
Speaker 4: with wanting his wife to be there for her family.

1225
00:52:55,560 --> 00:52:58,200
Speaker 4: He also said the children won't stop needing me just

1226
00:52:58,239 --> 00:53:01,840
Speaker 4: because they go to school. Started crying. Sorry, I'm a

1227
00:53:01,880 --> 00:53:04,000
Speaker 4: cry baby, and I told him if this is over,

1228
00:53:04,200 --> 00:53:06,640
Speaker 4: he should know it's all on him. He started yelling, no,

1229
00:53:07,160 --> 00:53:10,320
Speaker 4: because you're too stubborn and too self involved to actually

1230
00:53:10,320 --> 00:53:12,920
Speaker 4: take a second then think about my wishes. I wanted

1231
00:53:12,960 --> 00:53:15,080
Speaker 4: to leave because I couldn't be with him anymore, but

1232
00:53:15,120 --> 00:53:17,640
Speaker 4: he said that it would be more convenient if he did.

1233
00:53:17,840 --> 00:53:20,400
Speaker 4: He's moved to our city apartment. Y'all have a city apartment.

1234
00:53:20,480 --> 00:53:23,200
Speaker 1: He has a city apartment. How often is he staying there?

1235
00:53:23,440 --> 00:53:24,680
Speaker 4: And who else is staying there?

1236
00:53:24,760 --> 00:53:25,000
Speaker 1: Yeah?

1237
00:53:25,160 --> 00:53:29,080
Speaker 3: Riley, he did this comment earlier from a Yaghura cheating Yeah.

1238
00:53:28,719 --> 00:53:30,680
Speaker 4: I think I think that's a high likelihood.

1239
00:53:32,160 --> 00:53:36,080
Speaker 3: Yes, He's like, why won't you consider my ones and

1240
00:53:36,239 --> 00:53:38,799
Speaker 3: needs of like having you like around so I could

1241
00:53:38,800 --> 00:53:39,200
Speaker 3: go to my.

1242
00:53:39,280 --> 00:53:41,680
Speaker 4: City Permont and cheat? What you would tell I want?

1243
00:53:41,880 --> 00:53:44,239
Speaker 4: I just want you to watch the kids all the

1244
00:53:44,320 --> 00:53:46,720
Speaker 4: time so that I can check out of this family.

1245
00:53:47,040 --> 00:53:48,160
Speaker 1: Why won't you let me do it?

1246
00:53:48,239 --> 00:53:50,759
Speaker 4: I feel so lost and hurt. I love him so much,

1247
00:53:50,800 --> 00:53:53,200
Speaker 4: but I don't think continuing this relationship is healthy for

1248
00:53:53,280 --> 00:53:55,920
Speaker 4: either of us. My heart is breaking for my children.

1249
00:53:56,160 --> 00:53:58,080
Speaker 4: I don't know what to do. For now, I will

1250
00:53:58,160 --> 00:53:59,800
Speaker 4: just sit tight and wait for him to send me

1251
00:53:59,840 --> 00:54:02,640
Speaker 4: the horse papers. Thank you again for the help and advice.

1252
00:54:02,800 --> 00:54:05,520
Speaker 4: It helped a lot. PS. My mom was here yesterday.

1253
00:54:05,680 --> 00:54:08,880
Speaker 4: We talked a lot, and she's finally getting on my side. Good.

1254
00:54:09,200 --> 00:54:11,640
Speaker 4: I knew that when it came to it, she would

1255
00:54:11,680 --> 00:54:13,680
Speaker 4: be on my side, and I'm grateful. And there is

1256
00:54:13,719 --> 00:54:16,040
Speaker 4: a third update. Despite what OPI said about only be

1257
00:54:16,120 --> 00:54:17,640
Speaker 4: a being able to post once, it.

1258
00:54:17,680 --> 00:54:20,120
Speaker 1: Was lies, but good lies because we get to see

1259
00:54:20,200 --> 00:54:20,800
Speaker 1: what happens.

1260
00:54:20,840 --> 00:54:23,480
Speaker 4: That's true. Any thoughts before we get into this final update.

1261
00:54:23,680 --> 00:54:26,560
Speaker 3: I would counter divorce. I don't know, like, I don't

1262
00:54:26,560 --> 00:54:28,239
Speaker 3: know what the legal proceeding is.

1263
00:54:28,400 --> 00:54:30,080
Speaker 4: I raise you one divorce.

1264
00:54:30,200 --> 00:54:33,359
Speaker 3: I did recently hear a story where two people were

1265
00:54:33,400 --> 00:54:35,279
Speaker 3: divorced and trying to serve each other.

1266
00:54:35,360 --> 00:54:37,560
Speaker 1: Because it's like, so if she likes.

1267
00:54:37,520 --> 00:54:40,120
Speaker 3: At first or serves him or like, I don't know

1268
00:54:40,160 --> 00:54:42,400
Speaker 3: exactly how it works, but like I would look into

1269
00:54:42,480 --> 00:54:45,600
Speaker 3: seeing if that would help, would would help because then,

1270
00:54:45,800 --> 00:54:49,600
Speaker 3: I mean, bro is loaded, Like, in my opinion, you

1271
00:54:49,719 --> 00:54:52,160
Speaker 3: helped raise his children. He has plenty of money. Get

1272
00:54:52,160 --> 00:54:54,560
Speaker 3: that get that money for your dream lunch restaurant.

1273
00:54:55,080 --> 00:54:58,400
Speaker 4: Yeah, Cale von Combon has what like I was thinking saying,

1274
00:54:58,640 --> 00:55:00,880
Speaker 4: I sure hope they don't have a prina. I'm wondering

1275
00:55:01,239 --> 00:55:04,600
Speaker 4: when he became uber wealthy, you know, because if he

1276
00:55:04,680 --> 00:55:07,359
Speaker 4: made this thing post marriage, then they might not have

1277
00:55:07,400 --> 00:55:10,920
Speaker 4: a prenup. Yeah, but he did it pre marriage, ma'am

1278
00:55:11,040 --> 00:55:12,120
Speaker 4: a prenup.

1279
00:55:11,920 --> 00:55:15,120
Speaker 3: Yeah, which also too is like he's initiating the divorce.

1280
00:55:15,320 --> 00:55:18,120
Speaker 3: So if they don't, I would guess maybe they do

1281
00:55:18,239 --> 00:55:20,520
Speaker 3: have a prenup because he's like, oh, I'm good, the

1282
00:55:20,520 --> 00:55:21,680
Speaker 3: prenup is airtime.

1283
00:55:22,120 --> 00:55:23,200
Speaker 4: Yeah, don't care.

1284
00:55:23,640 --> 00:55:27,560
Speaker 1: Oh boy, Well let's see what actually is the truth.

1285
00:55:28,000 --> 00:55:32,360
Speaker 4: Update three, we're separating. Thank you everyone for the supports.

1286
00:55:32,560 --> 00:55:35,160
Speaker 4: My husband and I are separating. This is what he wants.

1287
00:55:35,360 --> 00:55:37,919
Speaker 4: As I suspected, this was more than just me going

1288
00:55:37,960 --> 00:55:40,359
Speaker 4: back to work. He's been feeling resentment towards a lot

1289
00:55:40,360 --> 00:55:42,520
Speaker 4: of things about me. Many of them I can't change,

1290
00:55:42,600 --> 00:55:44,600
Speaker 4: and the rest I don't want to change. It's not

1291
00:55:44,800 --> 00:55:47,399
Speaker 4: his or my fault. We're just not compatible with each

1292
00:55:47,400 --> 00:55:51,600
Speaker 4: other anymore. By the way, you're compatible with us. If

1293
00:55:51,640 --> 00:55:54,120
Speaker 4: you listen to full episodes of stories just like this.

1294
00:55:54,480 --> 00:55:57,600
Speaker 4: Just go to Spotify, Apple Podcasts, or iHeartRadio and search

1295
00:55:57,600 --> 00:55:59,680
Speaker 4: a Pocus story time. But there is a little bit

1296
00:55:59,760 --> 00:56:00,960
Speaker 4: left to the story.

1297
00:56:01,000 --> 00:56:04,720
Speaker 3: Any final thoughts, John, I mean very glad that Ope

1298
00:56:05,120 --> 00:56:07,600
Speaker 3: will now be free to live her life as she wants,

1299
00:56:07,600 --> 00:56:11,280
Speaker 3: as she deserves, as any person deserves. I just hope

1300
00:56:11,320 --> 00:56:14,440
Speaker 3: that she gets a little bit of this one hundred

1301
00:56:14,840 --> 00:56:16,440
Speaker 3: x salary money.

1302
00:56:16,640 --> 00:56:19,200
Speaker 4: Yeah, I mean, at the very least she should get

1303
00:56:19,200 --> 00:56:23,600
Speaker 4: some good child support definitely. Yeah, yeah, but no. Yeah,

1304
00:56:23,640 --> 00:56:26,120
Speaker 4: It's just like knowing that if someone is asking you

1305
00:56:26,200 --> 00:56:28,200
Speaker 4: to do, like being a stay at home mom is

1306
00:56:28,640 --> 00:56:31,760
Speaker 4: very worthy, very worthy vocation. But if someone is forcing

1307
00:56:31,800 --> 00:56:34,400
Speaker 4: you to do that and you don't want to, uh,

1308
00:56:34,400 --> 00:56:36,240
Speaker 4: take a look at that relationship and see.

1309
00:56:36,680 --> 00:56:39,120
Speaker 1: Whether or not you're being controlled indeed.

1310
00:56:38,920 --> 00:56:41,120
Speaker 4: Or attempted be controlled. But there's a little bit left.

1311
00:56:41,160 --> 00:56:44,400
Speaker 4: I still have fourteen months with my babies. Afterwards, all

1312
00:56:44,520 --> 00:56:47,160
Speaker 4: children are big enough for shared custody. I'm staying in

1313
00:56:47,160 --> 00:56:49,399
Speaker 4: the big house for now, but after the divorce, I'm

1314
00:56:49,440 --> 00:56:51,359
Speaker 4: going to move back to the city. I have been

1315
00:56:51,400 --> 00:56:53,839
Speaker 4: talking to my boss about my job. She will help

1316
00:56:53,880 --> 00:56:56,520
Speaker 4: me find a schedule around having the kids. So maybe

1317
00:56:56,560 --> 00:56:58,919
Speaker 4: I will work lunch hours the weeks I have them.

1318
00:56:59,120 --> 00:57:01,920
Speaker 4: My ambition is to still open my business, but maybe

1319
00:57:01,920 --> 00:57:04,040
Speaker 4: a bit further in the future. I still love him.

1320
00:57:04,120 --> 00:57:06,760
Speaker 4: I thought we were inseparable, but when he started resenting

1321
00:57:06,840 --> 00:57:08,959
Speaker 4: the very same things he loved about me, I knew

1322
00:57:08,960 --> 00:57:11,880
Speaker 4: this was hopeless. It sucks big time and it hurts sly,

1323
00:57:11,880 --> 00:57:14,520
Speaker 4: like hech, but here we are, and that's the end

1324
00:57:14,560 --> 00:57:18,400
Speaker 4: of that house. That's it what I said, that's the

1325
00:57:18,480 --> 00:57:19,120
Speaker 4: end of that house.

1326
00:57:19,360 --> 00:57:19,720
Speaker 1: You did?

1327
00:57:20,000 --> 00:57:20,840
Speaker 4: Why did I say that?

1328
00:57:20,920 --> 00:57:24,040
Speaker 3: I guess it's like that household is I honestly I

1329
00:57:24,080 --> 00:57:27,240
Speaker 3: was like, okay, slightly odd and rummage, but you know,

1330
00:57:27,280 --> 00:57:31,040
Speaker 3: it's still like their house is, you know, now separated whatever,

1331
00:57:31,080 --> 00:57:31,840
Speaker 3: like split.

1332
00:57:31,560 --> 00:57:32,120
Speaker 1: Home or whatever.

1333
00:57:32,320 --> 00:57:33,920
Speaker 4: The end of dead line, I meant to say, that's

1334
00:57:33,920 --> 00:57:34,800
Speaker 4: the end of that story.

1335
00:57:34,920 --> 00:57:37,360
Speaker 3: Oh and the end of this episode. There's there's no

1336
00:57:37,400 --> 00:57:42,040
Speaker 3: more snapping in new future versions of Sophia, O'Reilly and

1337
00:57:42,160 --> 00:57:44,600
Speaker 3: John popping up out of nowhere. It's just it's just

1338
00:57:44,800 --> 00:57:46,760
Speaker 3: actually over done done zone.

1339
00:57:46,880 --> 00:57:48,840
Speaker 1: No, I want to update. Let me see if there

1340
00:57:48,880 --> 00:57:49,440
Speaker 1: is an update.

1341
00:57:49,800 --> 00:57:54,240
Speaker 4: Oh no, I was gonna say. Opie's husband has this

1342
00:57:54,440 --> 00:57:59,000
Speaker 4: very I think he's falling into the trap of sometimes

1343
00:57:59,440 --> 00:58:02,200
Speaker 4: men can put women on this kind of not pedestal,

1344
00:58:02,280 --> 00:58:05,120
Speaker 4: but they can be obsessed with this one facet of

1345
00:58:05,160 --> 00:58:08,200
Speaker 4: a woman, like very independent, or she's like like, for example,

1346
00:58:08,320 --> 00:58:10,160
Speaker 4: like she's at the club and they're like, oh my god,

1347
00:58:10,160 --> 00:58:12,440
Speaker 4: they're so cool. She's at the club, and then when

1348
00:58:12,440 --> 00:58:14,280
Speaker 4: they get in a relationship with her, they're like, why

1349
00:58:14,360 --> 00:58:17,720
Speaker 4: is she at the club dancing? Yeah, but that's inappropriate.

1350
00:58:17,800 --> 00:58:19,959
Speaker 1: I don't like her. You met her, it's like, isn't

1351
00:58:20,000 --> 00:58:22,840
Speaker 1: it the thing you wanted from me in the first place?

1352
00:58:23,160 --> 00:58:23,520
Speaker 4: Yeah?

1353
00:58:23,640 --> 00:58:26,600
Speaker 1: Yeah. User has deleted their account.

1354
00:58:26,840 --> 00:58:28,400
Speaker 4: Well then that's that. Folks.

1355
00:58:28,680 --> 00:58:30,680
Speaker 1: There we go. So if you love us, make sure

1356
00:58:30,760 --> 00:58:31,320
Speaker 1: subscribe

1357
00:58:31,440 --> 00:58:33,640
Speaker 4: We love you and see it tomorrow.