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Speaker 1: Hey, guys, I'm Gailie Shore, and this is too much

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Speaker 1: to say question out you Happy New Year is over,

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Speaker 1: but it's probably gonna bleed into one a little bit.

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Speaker 1: I do think that things are looking up, they're getting better.

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Speaker 1: But oh, I was really hoping this will be over

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Speaker 1: so we could just start with that lovely, fresh, slate,

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Speaker 1: clean page that we all love so much about the

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Speaker 1: New Year. It's honestly kind of a joke though, the

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Speaker 1: whole like, oh new Year, knew me. I mean, it's

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Speaker 1: a marking of the passage of time. But self improvement

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Speaker 1: can happen any time year. I mean, I find that

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Speaker 1: the biggest epiphanies I have when it comes to growth

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Speaker 1: and you know, quitting the bullshit that I put myself

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Speaker 1: through is something bad happening as a result of my

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Speaker 1: actions and me like snapping out of it and realizing,

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Speaker 1: oh okay, well, um, you are the captain of your

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Speaker 1: own fate and the master of your own ship, so

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Speaker 1: figure it out and just like those wake up calls.

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Speaker 1: But you know, the new year is also a really

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Speaker 1: good reason to you know, assess, think about what's happened

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Speaker 1: in the past year, because a lot can happen in

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Speaker 1: a year. I like loosely believe in resolutions. I didn't

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Speaker 1: set one for twenty twenty, but I think I'm gonna

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Speaker 1: set some this year, just to like keep in mind

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Speaker 1: and you know, pick some things that I'd like to

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Speaker 1: focus on and try to do it because I have

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Speaker 1: a little bit more time on my hands these days. Honestly,

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Speaker 1: not a lot more. It's just I'm not in my

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Speaker 1: car as much. All my Zoom meetings are like, you know,

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Speaker 1: one after the other, which is kind of nice. I

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Speaker 1: don't know if we're looking on the bright side of

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Speaker 1: all this stuff. I do like there's so many less

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Speaker 1: meetings that should have been an email in There's been

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Speaker 1: so few for me, Like nobody wants to be on

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Speaker 1: Zoom anymore than they possibly have to be, so you

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Speaker 1: can like hash it out during an email. And I'm

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Speaker 1: so much more of that kind of person because you

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Speaker 1: can be multitasking, Like obviously you can't be looking at

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Speaker 1: your phone when you're in a meeting, but you can

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Speaker 1: be doing a million things at once and answering this

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Speaker 1: email and having that conversation. And I'm just trying to

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Speaker 1: knock out as much as possible. But I definitely have

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Speaker 1: a little bit more time on my hands. So I

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Speaker 1: think I'm gonna try to do more yoga. I really

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Speaker 1: didn't do any this past year at all. I did

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Speaker 1: some during quarantine. But it's been a really great outlet

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Speaker 1: for me in the past, you know, a few years

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Speaker 1: that I got into it to like manage anxiety and

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Speaker 1: stay healthy and do something active with my body, but

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Speaker 1: not in a like obsessive, working out, eating disordered way.

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Speaker 1: It's been a really healthy outlet for me. So I

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Speaker 1: need to do that more because I always feel so

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Speaker 1: good after I do it. Like I've never been like,

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Speaker 1: oh wow, I wish I hadn't taken that yoga class.

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Speaker 1: I've already been doing this, but I want to read more. Um,

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Speaker 1: I've read like three or four books in the past

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Speaker 1: two weeks. It's been it's been really nice. I another thing,

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Speaker 1: like I never finished a book and I'm like, oh,

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Speaker 1: I wish I had watched Netflix instead. I always feel

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Speaker 1: so good after, and so it's like finding those things,

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Speaker 1: reminding yourself of how you feel when you're done, and

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Speaker 1: being like, okay, do this just it's always just like

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Speaker 1: that first step. It's just picking up the book, it's

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Speaker 1: just signing up for the class, it's you know, putting

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Speaker 1: on your workout clothes and then everything else is fun.

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Speaker 1: I think one of the craziest things about New Year's

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Speaker 1: that that always strikes me is thinking about how much

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Speaker 1: can change in a year, and like, where I was

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Speaker 1: this time a year ago, and so much has happened.

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Speaker 1: So last New Year's Eve, I rang it in on

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Speaker 1: stage with Stevie Nicks and Nicole Kidman cheers in Champagne

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Speaker 1: on national television after just having opened for Keith Urban

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Speaker 1: and Jason Isbell and oh my god, it was an

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Speaker 1: amazing night and actually one of the funniest things ever happened.

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Speaker 1: Um And it's so crazy to talk about this because

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Speaker 1: none of this would be even kind of okay in

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Speaker 1: the world we live in now. And when you look back,

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Speaker 1: you're like, oh my god. The people just like shared candy,

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Speaker 1: you know. But Jason Isabel's little daughter, she's so so cute.

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Speaker 1: She was walking around handing out candy to everybody backstage,

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Speaker 1: and I was talking to um her and and her

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Speaker 1: her mom, Amanda Shires, and I was like, handy out

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Speaker 1: candy is a really great way to make friends, and

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Speaker 1: she was like the little one was like it's a

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Speaker 1: really great way to get attention. And she's like four

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Speaker 1: I think I was. I was like, ma'am. The self awareness,

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Speaker 1: the empowerment, I love it. And then I eat the candy.

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Speaker 1: But you couldn't just like eat candy, eat somebody gave

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Speaker 1: you right now. It's so it's so weird, but that

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Speaker 1: was a really magical night. And weirdly enough, my now

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Speaker 1: boyfriend Sam was there that night and we were just

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Speaker 1: friends at that point. But my friend Katherine after he

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Speaker 1: walked away like he'd been um he was backstage for

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Speaker 1: another reason and we were talking and stuff, and um,

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Speaker 1: he walks away, and Katherine goes, have you really why

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Speaker 1: didn't you talk to him? Like why haven't you gone

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Speaker 1: on a date with him or something? And I was like,

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Speaker 1: I don't know. He's pretty cute, right, And Katherine's like, yeah, Kaylee,

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Speaker 1: he's really freaking cute. And I was like, Okay, i'll

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Speaker 1: get it. I'll get to it. I'll get to it.

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Speaker 1: That's what I said. I mean, I did get to it,

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Speaker 1: but um, it was it was a really really great night.

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Speaker 1: I had so much fun. And that memory alone of

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Speaker 1: playing for like two thousand people and getting to do

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Speaker 1: that with my band and we're a sequined power suit

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Speaker 1: that has gotten me through some of the toughest moments

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Speaker 1: of twenty and I like go back, and I watched

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Speaker 1: these videos to remind myself that that's going to happen again,

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Speaker 1: and that's also been really good for me. But yeah,

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Speaker 1: this New Year's will look a lot different. Um, I'm

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Speaker 1: really pumped because, Um, I have a couple of friends.

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Speaker 1: Were all going to hang out at my boyfriend's parents house,

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Speaker 1: like by a couple, I mean like actually a couple.

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Speaker 1: They got their COVID tests. Pretty much all of us

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Speaker 1: have antibodies, so we're like able to like do like

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Speaker 1: a little tiny get together. Like I'm telling talking like

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Speaker 1: five people and most of whom are in the same household.

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Speaker 1: So judge me if you want. I think that, you know,

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Speaker 1: for me, being being with people is so so important

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Speaker 1: and I've been trying to find ways to do it safely.

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Speaker 1: And um, thankfully, my my best friend Candy has also

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Speaker 1: had COVID and the antibodies are are definitely holding up

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Speaker 1: for sure, so um we can hang out. And I

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Speaker 1: hugged her for the first time in a while, like

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Speaker 1: a little bit ago, and I was just like, oh

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Speaker 1: my god, like this is so emotional. But anyways, so

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Speaker 1: now I'm going to be sitting on a couch with

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Speaker 1: just a handful of people and not performing for two people.

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Speaker 1: But I'm still really excited about it. I have this

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Speaker 1: really beautiful floor length stress that I'm gonna be wearing

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Speaker 1: because extra doesn't stop just because the world does, all right.

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Speaker 1: But so yeah, him and I were just friends and

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Speaker 1: we started hanging out in February of this past year. UM,

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Speaker 1: So it took me about like a month to figure out,

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Speaker 1: like to get around to it, as I said, but

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Speaker 1: January of was weird for me. Um. I go back

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Speaker 1: and I read my diary entries from then, and it

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Speaker 1: just feels like a different person. Um. For one thing,

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Speaker 1: when I go back and I read, um, there's one

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Speaker 1: from December eighteenth, and December eighteenth was the first time

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Speaker 1: that Sam and I ever wrote and like hung out alone,

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Speaker 1: and we wrote a song together and had a really

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Speaker 1: good time, and I just remember thinking he was so

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Speaker 1: talented and I really liked hanging out with him. And

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Speaker 1: I was kind of seeing somebody in New York at

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Speaker 1: that time, so I didn't like super pick up on it,

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Speaker 1: but I was like, oh, he's really cute, and literally

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Speaker 1: a year to the day later, he um, he got

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Speaker 1: to meet my mom for this Christmas. So that was

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Speaker 1: really that was really cool. But it's just funny, like

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Speaker 1: everything that can happen in a year. And if i'd

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Speaker 1: you know, in that right with him, if someone had

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Speaker 1: told me like, oh, yeah, by the way, a year

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Speaker 1: from now, he's going to be meeting your mom and

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Speaker 1: be like, what you know? But going back and reading

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Speaker 1: these journal and trees is pretty crazy. I had. Okay,

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Speaker 1: So speaking of the moments that make you have a

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Speaker 1: wake up call and change your ridiculous behavior, Um, this

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Speaker 1: week last year, I had, Um what I had, just

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Speaker 1: what I decided immediately after would be my final one

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Speaker 1: night stand. It was not good, Um it was. It

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Speaker 1: was just like I think I legitimately did it. I

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Speaker 1: was out with Laurena Lena, and the guy was really cute.

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Speaker 1: He was friends with her friend, and you know, we

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Speaker 1: we hit it off, I suppose, But I was trying

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Speaker 1: to get back together with this guy had been talking

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Speaker 1: to for like on and off forever, and I was

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Speaker 1: literally trying to make him jealous. So I did it

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Speaker 1: to piss him off, which is one of the worst

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Speaker 1: things you can possibly do. It was really stupid. Didn't work, um,

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Speaker 1: and I'm glad it didn't work. I wouldn't have wanted

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Speaker 1: it to work in retrospect, but it was just overall

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Speaker 1: like very bad behavior. But what really was the icing

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Speaker 1: on the cake? There was the next morning. I woke

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Speaker 1: up at this guy's house and I was like, okay, um,

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Speaker 1: I needed to get the funk out of here, because

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Speaker 1: I didn't have any intention of staying over, but I

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Speaker 1: just I had fallen asleep and whatever. Um, and he

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Speaker 1: had blackout curtains. I'm very anti blackout curtains, Like I

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Speaker 1: want to have like shades, but like at least be

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Speaker 1: able to know what time of day it is. When

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Speaker 1: I look out the window. You can tell when it's

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Speaker 1: like eight am light versus one it's eleven am light.

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Speaker 1: But he had blackout curtains. So I wake up and

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Speaker 1: also I'm like trying to handle my ship together and

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Speaker 1: I can't see anything because fucking blackout curtains. And then

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Speaker 1: I'm like stumbling out. I swear to god it I

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Speaker 1: thought it was like seven am, Like I literally thought

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Speaker 1: it was Like I was like, I'm sneaking out of

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Speaker 1: here and then he catches me and he's like, oh hey,

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Speaker 1: I was like, huh yeah, hey, stup I'm pretty sure

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Speaker 1: I literally said stup um, and I just found an

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Speaker 1: excuse and I just ran out of there. I'm in

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Speaker 1: the elevator and there's so many people, and I looked

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Speaker 1: like a fucking hot mess. I remember I was wearing

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Speaker 1: a tank top that said in retrograde, and I was

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Speaker 1: in retrograde. I legitimately Mercury and me, we're both in retrograde.

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Speaker 1: And I'm looking around and like people are like walking

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Speaker 1: their dogs and fully dressed. And I was like, it's

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Speaker 1: not seven am. And I look at my phone as

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Speaker 1: soon as I got my the uber and I plug

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Speaker 1: it in and it was eleven am. And I was like,

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Speaker 1: fucking blackout curtains. Oh my god. It was terrible. It

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Speaker 1: was really terrible. So I was like, I'm never doing

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Speaker 1: that ever again. It was stupid. It's never worth it. Also,

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Speaker 1: like it's just not satisfying, you know, Like I don't.

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Speaker 1: I've never had a night like that and been like

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Speaker 1: yeah the next day ever, like anyways, but I think

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Speaker 1: that will probably be my last one ever. And I'm

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Speaker 1: pretty excited about that. Because they're not fun. So if

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Speaker 1: you're ever thinking about doing something like that and you haven't,

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Speaker 1: don't like at least like talk to the person for

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Speaker 1: a little bit before. I don't know, I'm not out

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Speaker 1: here just let shame people. But I'm just telling you

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Speaker 1: I've never once had a good time to eat. So

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Speaker 1: that's where I was at January. Another thing that was

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Speaker 1: happening in January of last year was I was going

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Speaker 1: to l A. And I've been back and forth for

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Speaker 1: a while. I really really love Los Angeles and I

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Speaker 1: was falling in love with Los Angeles. Um, I just

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Speaker 1: have so much fun when I'm out there, and I

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Speaker 1: was really getting caught up in it, and I was

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Speaker 1: like convincing myself I was going to move out there,

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Speaker 1: and my manager was like, Kaylee comb the funk on.

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Speaker 1: And the last journal entry I wrote before I started

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Speaker 1: seeing Sam was l A feels more and more like

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Speaker 1: home lately, and that was all I said. And I

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Speaker 1: was getting so ready to just call it and leave

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Speaker 1: Nashville and go there, and I just, you know, I

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Speaker 1: was looking for a reason to want to stay. I

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Speaker 1: opened my eyes to all the good things in Nashville

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Speaker 1: that I had been ignoring. Also around this time, I

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Speaker 1: moved in with roommates for the first time, So I

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Speaker 1: went from living by myself in an incredibly overpriced department

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Speaker 1: that would have been completely unsustainable during COVID, So thank

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Speaker 1: god I did that. Um but I had like a

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Speaker 1: yard for the first time, in a porch, and honestly

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Speaker 1: so my mom. I grew up in a two bedroom apartment,

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Speaker 1: like in a really shitty part of town, like I

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Speaker 1: hated it. I my mom still lives there. I'm trying

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Speaker 1: to get her to move. I just hate that place

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Speaker 1: so much and I always did. And my dad had

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Speaker 1: this beautiful like farmhouse up in northern Maine and it

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Speaker 1: was my favorite place on earth. We had a big

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Speaker 1: trampoline and it was white and had a big American

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Speaker 1: flag in the yard and it was just amazing. It

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Speaker 1: was on the river and it burnt down when I

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Speaker 1: was nine. So after that I literally only lived in

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Speaker 1: an apartment. So this is my first time living in

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Speaker 1: a house since that was nine, and I love it

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Speaker 1: so much. It's been it's been really cool. So that

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Speaker 1: was a big life change that is definitely paid off.

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Speaker 1: And I love my roommates. I love living with them.

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Speaker 1: It's so fun. My house is so girly and UM,

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Speaker 1: we just get along so well. It's it's amazing. But

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Speaker 1: so while I was out in l A this time

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Speaker 1: last year, I UM, I was doing meetings and had

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Speaker 1: a meeting with who would end up being my co

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Speaker 1: manager with my my current one, Todd and um he

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Speaker 1: helped me find my record deal. But I literally wrote

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Speaker 1: down a list on or eight and I said problems

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Speaker 1: I currently have, and they were being in debt. Okay,

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Speaker 1: that's that one's still there, UM working on it. UM

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Speaker 1: My car's damaged. I ran into a neighborhood watch sign

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Speaker 1: one time and it kind of messed up my bumper.

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Speaker 1: And it's like small enough that I don't care, and

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Speaker 1: I just have not got around to fixing it. Because

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Speaker 1: anytime I have like that amount of money laying around,

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Speaker 1: there's always something better to spend it on. So that

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Speaker 1: problem is still there, but I just have gotten really

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Speaker 1: used to it. I just don't care. UM owing my

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Speaker 1: manager money, I got to pay that back with my

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Speaker 1: record label advance. That was good. UM Owing my band

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Speaker 1: money because I hadn't gotten paid for the show yet.

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Speaker 1: I got I paid them back and then not having

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Speaker 1: a record deal solved that. And uh, wanting to be

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Speaker 1: with I need to have the nicknames for these guys.

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Speaker 1: Wanted to be with this guy that I did not

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Speaker 1: feel the same, and that one is absolute not a

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Speaker 1: problem anymore. So that's really good. The only problems they

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Speaker 1: still have are my bumper and my debt, and that's

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Speaker 1: just called being twenty six. There's definitely some other stuff

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Speaker 1: happening around this time last year, Like I was planning

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Speaker 1: my first ever headlining tour and thankfully I got to

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Speaker 1: do three dates on that um only three dates, but

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Speaker 1: I mean, that's happened to so many people. I saw

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Speaker 1: Dan and Stay on their first ever arena tour on

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Speaker 1: the first weekend and ended up being the only weekend.

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Speaker 1: But that was one of the last things I did

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Speaker 1: before quarantine, So I can, I can get over it,

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Speaker 1: because that must have that must have been so so

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Speaker 1: hard for them, like so many people have been hit

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Speaker 1: by that. But I was planning my first tour. I

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Speaker 1: was so excited it was gonna be amazing. Obviously we

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Speaker 1: know how that played out, but yeah, I mean, just god,

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Speaker 1: so much can happen in a year, And now looking

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Speaker 1: back at who I was a year ago. I'm so

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Speaker 1: much more centered. Obviously I still have my issues, but

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Speaker 1: my coping me could is ms are definitely better. I

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Speaker 1: can't believe I'm in a healthy relationship. I literally never

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Speaker 1: thought I would I would be in one. I think

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Speaker 1: that part of me thought I didn't deserve to be

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Speaker 1: in one. I think that you know that quote that

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Speaker 1: says we set the love we think we deserve is

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Speaker 1: so real. Like, if you're letting somebody love you poorly,

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Speaker 1: that means that you love yourself poorly. So like whatever

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Speaker 1: you're putting up with from a partner is how you

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Speaker 1: feel about yourself. So if like you're letting somebody just

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Speaker 1: treat you like garbage, it's because you're treating yourself like

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Speaker 1: garbage by extension and m So, I think a big

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Speaker 1: part of me, like this time last year, never thought

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Speaker 1: that I would I would see that I would, I

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Speaker 1: would be in one, And it's really awesome. It's really

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Speaker 1: fucking cool, and I'm so happy. And it's kind of

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Speaker 1: interesting because falling in love in quarantine is weird, but

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Speaker 1: it I kind of got to just focus on falling

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Speaker 1: in love and enjoy that feeling with so few distractions,

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Speaker 1: and that's an incredibly rare opportunity to ever get to

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Speaker 1: do something like that, but especially given how much I tore,

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Speaker 1: I would have been able to spend like literally a

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Speaker 1: quarter of the amount of time with him that I

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Speaker 1: was able to because the world shut down. So that's

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Speaker 1: been like kind of cool. But um, I'm just so

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Speaker 1: glad that I moved into a house and got a

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Speaker 1: boyfriend literally like weeks before quarantine, because otherwise I would

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Speaker 1: have been living by myself in this kind of stuffy,

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Speaker 1: um downtown apartment with like a very small balcony, and

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Speaker 1: I would have I mean, god, I can only imagine

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Speaker 1: like who I would have been texting during quarantine if

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Speaker 1: I hadn't had a boyfriend, and all of it is

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Speaker 1: just terrible, terrible options. I'm like, what would I have done?

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Speaker 1: Like quarantine dating so weird. But him and I like

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Speaker 1: when we first started dating, um, we both got corona,

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Speaker 1: so he had to quarantine with me and my roommates

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Speaker 1: because his roommate was like, please don't come home and

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Speaker 1: give me COVID, So we literally had to be like okay, well, um, anyways,

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Speaker 1: I know we just kind of decided to be official,

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Speaker 1: but um, you want to move in together for two weeks,

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Speaker 1: and by the end of the two weeks were like

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Speaker 1: we were like, oh, yeah, I guess you probably have

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Speaker 1: to leave. Okay, I mean you don't I have to, um.

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Speaker 1: But it was it was definitely a weird, a weird time,

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Speaker 1: and the beginning of was such a whirlwind for me,

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Speaker 1: and I think I I felt so hopeless this past

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Speaker 1: January because I thought I was never gonna be in

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Speaker 1: a healthy relationship. I thought I was never going to

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Speaker 1: have a record deal. I thought I was, you know,

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Speaker 1: never gonna be able to get myself out of out

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Speaker 1: of some of the debts that I have, like all

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Speaker 1: my now is personal debt. But I had like a

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Speaker 1: bunch of people to pay back from making the album,

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Speaker 1: and I was able to do that with my advance,

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Speaker 1: which is awesome. But I just felt so crippled by that.

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Speaker 1: And I wouldn't say I was like doing like terrible

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Speaker 1: like I was. I was definitely really excited. I was

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Speaker 1: coming off the New York Times Best in twenty nineteen

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Speaker 1: list thing that happened last year, and that was so

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Speaker 1: fucking cool. It gave me this massive like confidence boost,

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Speaker 1: and you know, touring and all of that that was

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Speaker 1: so fun. Like there's a lot of good things going on,

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Speaker 1: but I just I feel so much more mature and

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Speaker 1: I've calmed down too, because, like I've said before, I

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Speaker 1: don't think I've ever had like an alcohol problem, but

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Speaker 1: I was addicted to going out. Like I was addicted

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Speaker 1: to going to bars with my friends and staying out

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Speaker 1: all night and coming home at four am. And even

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Speaker 1: if I wasn't drinking, I still like I had to

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Speaker 1: do that. And there were so many times, like when

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Speaker 1: I was single and living alone, I would just be

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Speaker 1: gone seven and uh, being forced to stay home because

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Speaker 1: of quarantine like really showed me that I don't have

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Speaker 1: to be surrounded by noise to be happy. I don't

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Speaker 1: have to be you know, running from my problems, and

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Speaker 1: I don't have to go out every night. I've saved

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Speaker 1: a lot of money from that, for sure. Um, I

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Speaker 1: don't know, it's interesting. It's interesting just to look back.

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Speaker 1: So I'm really interested to hear from you guys where

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Speaker 1: you were last year versus where you are now, How

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Speaker 1: much has changed, how much hasn't. I'd love to talk

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Speaker 1: to you about it. You can always tweet me at

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Speaker 1: Kaylie Shore I love Twitter more than anything, so let's

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Speaker 1: chat on there. It's one of my favorite things to do.

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Speaker 1: I hope that you guys have a really happy New Year.

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Speaker 1: I have such high hopes for I think it's going

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Speaker 1: to be really incredible, and I think that we're all

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Speaker 1: gonna come out of this stronger and better. And I'm

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Speaker 1: just feeling really thankful, even though there's so much ship

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Speaker 1: going on right now, I'm very thankful for what I

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Speaker 1: do have, which is you know, you guys, and this

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Speaker 1: podcast and having an incredible team over at Teamwork Records,

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Speaker 1: and this healthy relationship and these incredible friendships. I don't

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Speaker 1: have anybody toxic in my life, Like, I don't have

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Speaker 1: a single toxic person in my life anymore. Like I

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Speaker 1: cut everybody out and it was easy to do that

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Speaker 1: during quarantine too, because you just stopped hanging out with

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Speaker 1: them and then you just kind of like slowly backed off.

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Speaker 1: And that's been really really great. So I don't know,

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Speaker 1: it's a complicated year. I feel like even though I

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Speaker 1: was just sitting at my house for all of it,

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Speaker 1: I feel like I could write a book about I

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Speaker 1: could write a full novel about what that was for me.

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Speaker 1: So thank you guys for being a really huge bright

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Speaker 1: spot in it. Here's to happy New Year. I love

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Speaker 1: you guys so much. My name is Kaili Shore and

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Speaker 1: this is too much to say it out of you