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Speaker 1: Wind Down with Janet Kramer and I'm Heart Radio Podcast.

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Speaker 1: I just want to start this off by saying it.

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Speaker 1: I am having a very bad day today. Today is

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Speaker 1: just not a great day. Does everyone else? How's everyone

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Speaker 1: else feeling?

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Speaker 2: Well? Not wonderful because today it's very rainy in Los Angeles?

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Speaker 3: Really, and I got my booster yesterday, so I'm a

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Speaker 3: little bit I feel like I want to.

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Speaker 2: Go light out.

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Speaker 4: I've heard so terrible.

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Speaker 2: It's about the same as the second, my last one.

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Speaker 2: It's about the same, which is I'm somewhere between great

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Speaker 2: and terrible.

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Speaker 5: That's thanks Easton.

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Speaker 6: I'm good.

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Speaker 7: You know.

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Speaker 8: I had that booster like a month or two ago.

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Speaker 8: I was fine, baby, I was. I don't think they

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Speaker 8: gave me the right one. I think I think they.

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Speaker 4: I'm just trying to get I'm working on it. Don't

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Speaker 4: look at me that crazy. I'm almost there. I'm taller

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Speaker 4: than whom everyone was here before.

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Speaker 5: How are you, Catherine?

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Speaker 4: I'm good.

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Speaker 5: You got that microphone figured out there? I hear you can.

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Speaker 6: Yeah, the listener is going to hear that too.

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Speaker 5: I'm doing it before we start.

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Speaker 1: Well, we're actually started, Okay. I told you I'm in

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Speaker 1: a bad mood clearly.

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Speaker 2: What's the genesis of your bad mood?

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Speaker 7: You know?

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Speaker 1: I received an email I think by accident, and it

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Speaker 1: bothered me because it was someone spending money from my

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Speaker 1: past and I just felt like annoyance and just and

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Speaker 1: then some things happened after that, and then I just

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Speaker 1: I just I just I just am just a lot

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Speaker 1: of emotions came up of a resentment and annoyances and

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Speaker 1: I'm getting rid of like this like work bench thing

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Speaker 1: that he spent a lot of money on, and it

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Speaker 1: was like never, it was never.

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Speaker 5: I don't know, I mean, I don't even.

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Speaker 3: I know it's hard to talk about, but I think

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Speaker 3: all of us know exactly what you're saying, and I

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Speaker 3: understand how frustrated that would be.

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Speaker 1: Yeah, but I did hear did you say that me

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Speaker 1: and Ryan had a connection?

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Speaker 2: You know, I feel that there was a vibe there,

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Speaker 2: there was something. There's a nice back and forth happening

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Speaker 2: with Seacrest. Yeah.

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Speaker 1: I was on the Sea Crusher, which I was actually

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Speaker 1: really nervous about. Did I did I sound nervous?

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Speaker 2: You did not seem nervous. No, really, you didn't know,

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Speaker 2: you seem you seem great, You were great.

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Speaker 5: Oh, thanks but there was great.

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Speaker 1: There was a nice back and forth banter, but I

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Speaker 1: didn't feel a connection.

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Speaker 2: No, no, well hey, well the drawing board.

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Speaker 1: No, we're good. Yeah, but anyways, I missed you guys.

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Speaker 1: You guys have been gone a few shows.

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Speaker 6: Ish.

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Speaker 2: It's tough. Your schedule affair is always changing. It's hard

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Speaker 2: to keep up.

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Speaker 6: Yes, happy to be here today.

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Speaker 8: Well that's good, very blessed to be here. I'm being serious.

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Speaker 8: I love you any moment with you as a treasure.

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Speaker 1: Oh there's so much sarcasm in that.

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Speaker 4: I he's just sucking up to you, does it?

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Speaker 5: Okay? I have a question.

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Speaker 1: Can we talk about gifts for a second, because the

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Speaker 1: holiday season is coming up and.

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Speaker 5: I Catherine just said I'm.

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Speaker 1: Really hard to buy for which I really And here's

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Speaker 1: here's here's the thing. Let's just say that you're starting

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Speaker 1: to let me let me just do you like to

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Speaker 1: get gifts as a man?

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Speaker 5: Easton Mark go.

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Speaker 6: Receive them or buy them?

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Speaker 5: Both?

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Speaker 6: Yeah?

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Speaker 8: I like to get them more than I like to

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Speaker 8: buy them. I guess so if I'm being honest here.

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Speaker 3: Yes, I enjoy receiving gifts. It's great. I'm not great

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Speaker 3: at buying them.

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Speaker 9: Okay, I will defend men in this one, okay, because

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Speaker 9: I think it's really really hard to get it right.

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Speaker 9: I think you're you can You're intent can be good,

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Speaker 9: like getting shoes, for instance, But are you really gonna

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Speaker 9: pick out the shoes that you're.

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Speaker 4: Really gonna wear? Want to wear?

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Speaker 9: And are you really gonna keep them and wear them

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Speaker 9: if they get the shoes that you don't like.

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Speaker 1: I've never returned a pair of shoes. Are you gonna

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Speaker 1: wear I've always worn them.

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Speaker 4: I don't believe you.

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Speaker 9: I'm gonna buy you someware don't purposely by the shoes.

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Speaker 1: I Why am I so hard to buy for? And

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Speaker 1: you're to have to say this, beast, I truly don't

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Speaker 1: want anything. Having said that, why are you looking.

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Speaker 5: At me like that?

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Speaker 4: Because that's not true.

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Speaker 1: I just I like to say I mean it. I

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Speaker 1: want something meaningful, like you know, my last Christmas is

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Speaker 1: like there was. It's like I like to give a

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Speaker 1: lot for Christmas to the person that I love. So

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Speaker 1: when I receive a the day and Amazon pens back,

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Speaker 1: it can be a little hurtful.

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Speaker 9: Well, the answer to your question about why you're hard

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Speaker 9: to shop for is one is because you are so

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Speaker 9: giving with gifts, So there's there's a lot of pressure there,

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Speaker 9: I'll be honest.

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Speaker 4: Yeah, it raises the bar a lot. That's one.

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Speaker 9: Two, Like you do have a particular style or a

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Speaker 9: particular any girl, any girl.

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Speaker 4: That's hard. Like that's why my husband stopped buying me

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Speaker 4: because I.

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Speaker 9: Took everything back, like you said, like if I didn't

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Speaker 9: like it, I'm not going to just keep it and

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Speaker 9: waste the money, like if I'm not gonna wear it

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Speaker 9: or it sits in the closet. I don't like hurting,

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Speaker 9: like I like to pretend like I like it.

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Speaker 5: Oh, I pretend because I don't want to hurt his.

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Speaker 4: Face because at least he tried, you know.

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Speaker 1: Like I remember one year Mike got me like the

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Speaker 1: ugliest shirt ever, and I was like, oh.

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Speaker 5: My god, I love it. You have to pretend, but

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Speaker 5: I love it so much.

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Speaker 1: I could never tell someone I don't like their gifts,

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Speaker 1: like I just I can't.

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Speaker 8: I think that men men are have more of like

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Speaker 8: a they have more stuff, their stuff, you know, like

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Speaker 8: like Mark Mark likes the Brewers, like I like Captain America,

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Speaker 8: Like like men don't grow out of that boy thing,

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Speaker 8: and women have much more just a much more discerning

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Speaker 8: palate when it comes to the things they like.

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Speaker 2: Because we're children, because yes, because.

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Speaker 8: Men are children and women are full grown adults that

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Speaker 8: like exist in the world. And I think that's why

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Speaker 8: it's it's easy to buy for men and harder to

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Speaker 8: buy for women.

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Speaker 6: That's some navoys thought about.

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Speaker 1: Yeah, sure, I think I get that, But I also

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Speaker 1: I feel like it is it a fantasy to just

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Speaker 1: be like on Christmas morning to open this like beautiful,

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Speaker 1: little like delicate piece of jewelry and be like, oh

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Speaker 1: my God, thank you and you didn't have to ask

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Speaker 1: all my friends and.

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Speaker 9: Like, well, no, I mean I don't think it's a

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Speaker 9: complete fantasy, but for it to be the perfect exactly

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Speaker 9: what you wanted.

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Speaker 1: But it's the thought that counts. That's the thing. Like

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Speaker 1: I don't care actually what it is. It's like the

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Speaker 1: thought and the intention behind.

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Speaker 9: It, which I think you mean, But I think the

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Speaker 9: pressure on the other end is getting it right.

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Speaker 4: Interesting, Like I was even dressed about the necklace I

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Speaker 4: got for you.

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Speaker 5: I love it and I really.

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Speaker 4: Genuinely do, right, but you actually do, but like you

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Speaker 4: might not think.

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Speaker 1: The prettiest, little daintiest and it's like it's all like

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Speaker 1: at the end of the day, like it's just like

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Speaker 1: write me a beautiful letter and frame it or like

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Speaker 1: things like that are so sweet.

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Speaker 5: But I'm just saying, what girl doesn't like a little diamond?

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Speaker 4: You are there, so do we want diamonds or shoes?

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Speaker 1: Anyways, we have an amazing guest in the uh uh

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Speaker 1: the waiting room, Jesus, I like with the waiting room.

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Speaker 1: We're going to bring her on and we're going to

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Speaker 1: talk about mental health because it needs to be talked

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Speaker 1: about more so, and then we'll get back to this

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Speaker 1: Christmas combo because a certain someone texted Catherine asking for

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Speaker 1: a gift idea for me, So stay tuned.

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Speaker 5: All right, Hey, Mandy, how.

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Speaker 10: Are you, lady good?

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Speaker 6: How are you?

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Speaker 5: I'm Janna. This is my co host and best friend Catherine.

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Speaker 4: Hey, how are you?

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Speaker 10: Nice to meet you?

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Speaker 5: Nice to meet you, Nice to meet you.

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Speaker 1: I feel like you have just joined us on the

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Speaker 1: perfect day because I woke up in just a funk,

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Speaker 1: like a total frickin' funk, you know, just one of

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Speaker 1: those days where we're just like, you don't even like

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Speaker 1: there's like things that are bothering you. But at the

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Speaker 1: same time, it's just this like blanket over you.

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Speaker 5: You know.

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Speaker 10: Oh yeah, I get that.

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Speaker 7: I get that a lot where you just feel like,

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Speaker 7: uh and there's no reason to be like uh.

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Speaker 1: Like there's like maybe a little pieces, but it's like

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Speaker 1: it's like that shouldn't be bringing me down to like,

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Speaker 1: you know, depression town.

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Speaker 10: All right, well, let's perk you up there.

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Speaker 1: I know, I know, but I but I was, you know,

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Speaker 1: I was so excited to have you on because I think,

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Speaker 1: you know, what you guys are doing are is incredible,

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Speaker 1: and I know I know that it's launching. Wonder Mind

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Speaker 1: is launching in February, So could you just kind of

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Speaker 1: give a synopsis of what it is to our listeners

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Speaker 1: and and what's going to be on Wonderland wonder Mind.

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Speaker 7: Yeah, wonder Mine is basically we're creating the first mental

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Speaker 7: fitness ecosystem, which for what that means to us is

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Speaker 7: we're going to cover all media like daily content, podcasts, film,

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Speaker 7: and television, but we're also going to create tangible product,

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Speaker 7: so instead of it being an app, it's something that

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Speaker 7: will kind of disconnect you. We are thinking about an app,

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Speaker 7: but I can't like say for sure if that's going

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Speaker 7: to happen. But like tangible products, So what would a

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Speaker 7: mental health aisle at target mean and what would it

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Speaker 7: look like? And for example, with a tangible product, I

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Speaker 7: like to use ADHD because that's what I have, And

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Speaker 7: but they give you these big, bulky timers to keep

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Speaker 7: you focused.

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Speaker 10: So we're going to create like cool little.

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Speaker 7: Dice so that like kids will carry them, you can

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Speaker 7: put them on your desk. Nobody's going to ask you

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Speaker 7: what it is, and so everything is going to be

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Speaker 7: We're building.

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Speaker 10: Our advisory board, We're going to work.

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Speaker 7: With neuroscientists to create new content and not like necessarily

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Speaker 7: new verbiage. We're gonna stay aligned with like everything that's

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Speaker 7: already been scientifically proven, but also kind of pushed those

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Speaker 7: boundaries to, you know, with with the proper people because

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Speaker 7: none of us are professionals and we're not here to

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Speaker 7: diagnose anyone. We're here to kind of go on that

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Speaker 7: journey of learning how you make your mind your mindset,

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Speaker 7: that you're more unique than defective. Because people like to

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Speaker 7: think as a mental illness. If you're diagnosed with that

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Speaker 7: it started back with it used to be religion. If

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Speaker 7: you know you had mental health back in the seventeenth century,

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Speaker 7: you're demonic. Then you know, the eighteenth century became like unhygienic,

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Speaker 7: and so there's always just been this like stigma on

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Speaker 7: it where people don't really want to like talk about

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Speaker 7: it because also the media ourself has played a role

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Speaker 7: in kind of like showing the darkest side of mental

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Speaker 7: health with things like Girl in Erupted or One Who

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Speaker 7: Flew Over the Cuckoo's Nest.

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Speaker 10: So I feel like trying.

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Speaker 7: To detach some of the apps and some of that

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Speaker 7: to build an outside community where we're really touching like

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Speaker 7: each other one on one and in person. We want

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Speaker 7: them to be able to talk about it. So, like

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Speaker 7: our first podcast will be called two and eight, which

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Speaker 7: means State of Mind and Cockney, And we're just going

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Speaker 7: to have conversations with anybody and everybody about like daily.

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Speaker 10: Routines or something.

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Speaker 7: They may want to talk about how they overcame something,

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Speaker 7: but we're not going to like put a label. If

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Speaker 7: someone wants to say, yeah, I'm diagnosed by polar that's

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Speaker 7: their right, but we're not going to push it and say, oh,

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Speaker 7: we'll have you checked out like this or you know,

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Speaker 7: We're just going to have honest conversations to where.

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Speaker 10: Where people see that even if you have.

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Speaker 7: A diagnosed mental health illness, that you are not broken

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Speaker 7: and you can't have a fruitful life like it's going

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Speaker 7: to be a journey. It's never going to be fixed.

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Speaker 7: So let's how do you exercise your mind? And my partner,

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Speaker 7: Danielle as she uses a great metaphor that when you

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Speaker 7: are working out and you have a personal trainer, you

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Speaker 7: can't not work out the rest of the week, otherwise

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Speaker 7: you're not getting that six pack. So your therapist is

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Speaker 7: your personal trainer. And some people can't afford to go

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Speaker 7: to therapy more than once a month, So what do

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Speaker 7: you do in between? And we want to provide some

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Speaker 7: of those tools that will be free and accessible because

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Speaker 7: we also want to reach the underprivileged communities that don't

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Speaker 7: have access to any of it and where the government

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Speaker 7: kind of wants to keep it like out because then

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Speaker 7: the prison systems are going to fail if all everybody

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Speaker 7: starts getting you know, their mental health aligned. So you know,

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Speaker 7: that was a long answer to what mental fitness means,

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Speaker 7: but it's just becoming part of your daily routine. And

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Speaker 7: all of our stuff is going to be done through

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Speaker 7: creative Like our journal is a creative journal. It's not

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Speaker 7: this morning I woke up failing five. My goal is

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Speaker 7: to fill ten because there's so much toxic positivity and

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Speaker 7: toxic happiness that you know, when you are dealing with,

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Speaker 7: like say depression and you've never dealt with it before,

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Speaker 7: you could get it can get misconstrued to where you

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Speaker 7: feel like your your you're you know, you're wrong, or

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Speaker 7: you're bad or and then you watch other people just saying, oh,

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Speaker 7: breathe five times and you're going to be okay, And yeah, breathe.

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Speaker 7: Breathing is helpful, but that's not going to fix a

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Speaker 7: long term, you know issue you may.

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Speaker 5: Have for sure.

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Speaker 1: Yeah, what what is the thing that helps you? Like

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Speaker 1: they're you know, like for me, like with my physical fitness,

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Speaker 1: like I love to run, that also helps my mental

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Speaker 1: fitness too, Yes, but what's what's the thing that kind

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Speaker 1: of is like is your top that helps you with

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Speaker 1: your mental fitness?

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Speaker 7: Putting my phone down, not looking at social media? And

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Speaker 7: you know, I I try to.

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Speaker 10: I try to just like read books.

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Speaker 7: Or find like go into my bedroom and kind of

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Speaker 7: relax or meditate, and you know I I do.

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Speaker 10: I am blessed to be able to have therapy once

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Speaker 10: a week and you know, uh.

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Speaker 7: CBT DBT cognitive behavioral therapy, where you know, there's there's

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Speaker 7: this one thing I learned when I went away to

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Speaker 7: treatment that it's a balloon. And so every time you're

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Speaker 7: mad at someone, you like draw a picture of that

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Speaker 7: person on the balloon and then you pop it and

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Speaker 7: you just keep blowing that up and popping that, and

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Speaker 7: then eventually the anger goes away and then you could

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Speaker 7: make more like decisive decisions on how you're going to

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Speaker 7: actually approach that person. So it like, you know, it's

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Speaker 7: like the screaming and the pillow, but it's actually a

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Speaker 7: lot more fun to pop on with a needle.

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Speaker 1: Yes, I need that so badly, Like that would be

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Speaker 1: that would be fantastic. Something else you said too with

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Speaker 1: the your ADHD that could the time or the counter thing.

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Speaker 1: Sometimes I've noticed, like today I even noticed that like

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Speaker 1: I kind of got into like a depressed state and

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Speaker 1: was you know, I had so much to do and

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Speaker 1: I literally just like stared at my computer screen for

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Speaker 1: like and stayed in it for like a good few hours,

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Speaker 1: and it was like mindlessly like doing stuff. But like

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Speaker 1: I just was like and the entire time I had

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Speaker 1: was like get up, like get up and go do

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Speaker 1: what you have to do, or like either I get

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Speaker 1: up do something, you know what I mean, and then

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Speaker 1: I but if I could have something that was just

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Speaker 1: like you know, I sometimes think of Mel when she

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Speaker 1: she's Mel Robins Robins, Yeah, when she's like five four

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Speaker 1: three two one, get up, like go and it's like

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Speaker 1: sometimes I have to like do things like that, but

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Speaker 1: that something tangible like that would be really great to

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Speaker 1: like help in those moments. But I just I love

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Speaker 1: it because I especially when when you're when we're on

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Speaker 1: social media and or the internet or whatever, it'd be

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Speaker 1: nice to have a place where you're actually getting things

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Speaker 1: that are helpful and not things that are triggering more

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Speaker 1: of the stressors and the triggers and the depression and

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Speaker 1: all that stuff.

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Speaker 7: Yeah, I think I think simplifying it is like, you know,

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Speaker 7: I'm not talking about like professionals that are aligned trying

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Speaker 7: to make change. I'm talking about, you know, more of

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Speaker 7: the armchair therapists. Like you know, I've I was misdiagnosed

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Speaker 7: bipolar and just found out in my forties. I'm actually

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Speaker 7: eighthd with trauma, so I know everything there is to

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Speaker 7: know about bipolar. But I'm relearning how my brain functions

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Speaker 7: really as ADHD. So I think like when you know,

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Speaker 7: I use this example all the time, but like when

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Speaker 7: you do the go on the YouTube and these people

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Speaker 7: are just like pretending to be a therapists and it's

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Speaker 7: like five tips he's a narcissist.

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Speaker 10: It's like those are all five tips of me.

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Speaker 7: And I don't feel I'm narcissistic. I cry, I have emotions,

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Speaker 7: I have empathy. Like, so I think that as kind

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Speaker 7: of really we need to take back the language. We

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Speaker 7: need to take back the verbiage and kind of like

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Speaker 7: gas lighting is so thrown out there, like and do

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Speaker 7: some people really know what gas lighting is? Or you

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Speaker 7: can't say someone's a sociopath? You know, It's like we're

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Speaker 7: all diagnosing each other. And so what I feel is

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Speaker 7: what we can do at Wondermine is just all kind

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Speaker 7: of talk to each other and and you know, like

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Speaker 7: all of us are gonna be honest because we're three

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Speaker 7: different women from three different generations that have our own

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Speaker 7: successful businesses prior to this, so we wanted to That's

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Speaker 7: why the entrepreneur was so important to us, because we're

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Speaker 7: showing you can have a diagnose mental illness and.

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Speaker 10: Still live a fruitful life.

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Speaker 7: You Still it's not I'm not saying it's going to

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Speaker 7: be easy, but I feel that that's what some of

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Speaker 7: these armchair like therapists do, is like, oh, like if

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Speaker 7: you just go out and meditate for ten minutes, it's

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Speaker 7: a combination of getting a routine together that can actually.

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Speaker 10: Help you.

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Speaker 7: In other forms. And so, like we with with kind

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Speaker 7: of the app situation, we have done some discovery that

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Speaker 7: the reason why some of it like falls off is

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Speaker 7: because there is no physical or verbal interaction, and so

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Speaker 7: we want to kind of go back to where you know, this.

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Speaker 10: Is a child's dream come true.

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Speaker 7: But like back in my day, they would like people

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Speaker 7: would just show up at your house and you would

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Speaker 7: just all hang out with your family and everybody was welcome.

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Speaker 7: And now today, like it just seems the more and

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Speaker 7: more social media, the more and more enclosed we're getting.

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Speaker 7: And when you already have a mental health diagnosis, you

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Speaker 7: already feel isolated. So now this isolation that we're all

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Speaker 7: experiencing on top of you know, already feeling like no

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Speaker 7: one understands you is so dangerous and it's that's that's

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Speaker 7: where the toxicity comes in. And we just want to

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Speaker 7: share our stories and grow with our listeners, grow with it,

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Speaker 7: and like just you know, may may everyone know that

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Speaker 7: you're not broken.

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Speaker 10: You're not.

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Speaker 7: If your religion is like, oh, you're you know, a

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Speaker 7: demon when we need to do an exorcism. There's so

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Speaker 7: many like barriers that we have to get through that

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Speaker 7: our first agenda is just like, let's chill, let's talk,

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Speaker 7: let's build these tools that you're not ashamed to use.

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Speaker 7: And like our journal I already said it was kind

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Speaker 7: of creative or whatever, and but we're going to work

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Speaker 7: with neuroscientists on creating all of this content of how

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Speaker 7: you may not even feel and you're enjoying working your mind.

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Speaker 9: It's such a good point you brought up earlier about

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Speaker 9: you know, we talk about therapy a lot on this

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Speaker 9: podcast and how fortunate enough we are to go to therapy.

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Speaker 9: But I was actually thinking about this before, like how

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Speaker 9: many people can truly afford to go to if insurance

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Speaker 9: doesn't cover it, you know, every week to therapy or

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Speaker 9: every month or you know, I actually have a friend

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Speaker 9: who is looking for therapy for two of her sons,

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Speaker 9: and she's like, I can't afford that.

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Speaker 4: I can't afford to.

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Speaker 9: Go every week, you know, but I need they need help,

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Speaker 9: you know, and it's it's they need something, you know.

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Speaker 9: There has to be something out there for people that

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Speaker 9: cannot afford to do that. I mean it's expensive, you know,

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Speaker 9: it's a lot more fortunate, but yeah.

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Speaker 10: No, it's really expensive.

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Speaker 7: And then if you need medication, you've seen a psychologist

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Speaker 7: and a psychiatrist, so there's two bills, you know, and

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Speaker 7: the psychiatrists talked to you for like fifteen minutes, and

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Speaker 7: just to assume the.

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Speaker 10: Medication is working. You know.

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Speaker 7: I have a very good relationship with my psychiatrists. But

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Speaker 7: whenever I finally went away, I had actually for my

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Speaker 7: bipolar I was put on anti seizure medication. And when

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Speaker 7: I started getting an early menopause, my hormones started changing

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Speaker 7: and I was having grand mall seizures from this anti

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Speaker 7: seizure medication. And then I was having this medication to

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Speaker 7: override this medication, to override this medication, and I just like,

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Speaker 7: I took so many sleeping pills because it had been

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Speaker 7: like a week and I hadn't slept, and then I

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Speaker 7: didn't go to sleep, and I just looked at my

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Speaker 7: husband and I said, there's something wrong and it's not

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Speaker 7: working like.

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Speaker 10: My weekly therapy.

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Speaker 7: And I got on a plane and went away and

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Speaker 7: spent thirty days with people who really listened and really tested.

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Speaker 7: And that facility was fifteen hundred dollars a day. Luckily

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Speaker 7: my instaurants covered it. But I want to take some

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Speaker 7: of those tools and put those online, you know, like

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Speaker 7: we can't replace that, but we want to like offer some.

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Speaker 10: Of those like work books that maybe you can do,

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Speaker 10: or like.

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Speaker 7: That, you know, popping the balloon, like it really used

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Speaker 7: to just have a wall of balloon so you could

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Speaker 7: just walk through and pop them a lot.

445
00:22:44,280 --> 00:22:44,560
Speaker 2: Like I have.

446
00:22:44,720 --> 00:22:45,359
Speaker 10: Yeah, I have.

447
00:22:45,440 --> 00:22:46,919
Speaker 1: I have a bunch of balloons saved up for my

448
00:22:46,920 --> 00:22:48,760
Speaker 1: son's third birthday party. So I'm just going to start

449
00:22:48,760 --> 00:22:51,560
Speaker 1: blowing some up and just start taking to the wall. Yeah,

450
00:22:51,560 --> 00:22:53,120
Speaker 1: I know, right there, right there on the wall. It's

451
00:22:53,119 --> 00:22:56,480
Speaker 1: gonna be great. I asked him some of the listeners

452
00:22:57,119 --> 00:23:01,520
Speaker 1: on my Instagram some questions you know about because I said,

453
00:23:01,520 --> 00:23:05,160
Speaker 1: I was talking to you and just I know, you.

454
00:23:05,040 --> 00:23:08,080
Speaker 5: Know, I'm not therapist. You're not therapists. You're not therapists.

455
00:23:08,119 --> 00:23:12,160
Speaker 1: But we've also have our own issues around mental health

456
00:23:12,160 --> 00:23:15,720
Speaker 1: and we all go through things, and so someone there's

457
00:23:15,760 --> 00:23:17,879
Speaker 1: a few questions I wanted to ask you. This is

458
00:23:17,920 --> 00:23:21,439
Speaker 1: from Miss Angela. How do you help others deal with

459
00:23:21,480 --> 00:23:25,080
Speaker 1: mental health while still watching yours? Because I think that's

460
00:23:25,119 --> 00:23:28,800
Speaker 1: a really good because I'm always like trying to be

461
00:23:29,000 --> 00:23:32,159
Speaker 1: authentic on my Instagram, but at the same time, I'm like, well, shoot,

462
00:23:32,200 --> 00:23:34,440
Speaker 1: like I still have, you know, my own issues too

463
00:23:34,440 --> 00:23:36,440
Speaker 1: that I have to, you know, make sure I go

464
00:23:36,480 --> 00:23:38,160
Speaker 1: to therapy or talk to a friend, or like today

465
00:23:38,359 --> 00:23:40,160
Speaker 1: just being like, I had a really crappy day today

466
00:23:40,160 --> 00:23:41,440
Speaker 1: and I feel depressed.

467
00:23:41,480 --> 00:23:43,480
Speaker 5: But how do you how do you do it? Yours?

468
00:23:44,640 --> 00:23:48,240
Speaker 7: I used to have a major problem. Even when I

469
00:23:48,280 --> 00:23:51,440
Speaker 7: went away to the facility, I was afraid to get

470
00:23:51,480 --> 00:23:54,200
Speaker 7: close to anyone because it's so easy to deflect your

471
00:23:54,240 --> 00:23:57,680
Speaker 7: issues and want to help other people fix their issues,

472
00:23:58,080 --> 00:24:00,159
Speaker 7: but then you run out of any steam, so you're

473
00:24:00,200 --> 00:24:04,760
Speaker 7: not helping yourself. So what I've learned to do is listen.

474
00:24:05,080 --> 00:24:08,480
Speaker 7: Just let them talk, Just let them talk completely, hear

475
00:24:08,520 --> 00:24:11,479
Speaker 7: them out, and then ask them do you want me

476
00:24:11,520 --> 00:24:14,000
Speaker 7: to listen or do you want advice or do you

477
00:24:14,040 --> 00:24:17,960
Speaker 7: want to know my experience? And knowing that I can't

478
00:24:18,000 --> 00:24:21,640
Speaker 7: give you advice, but like maybe I.

479
00:24:21,600 --> 00:24:23,480
Speaker 10: Can guide you to a book I read.

480
00:24:23,400 --> 00:24:26,080
Speaker 7: Or got it and then not hold on to it

481
00:24:26,160 --> 00:24:28,320
Speaker 7: and then follow up and check on to them. And

482
00:24:28,359 --> 00:24:30,360
Speaker 7: that's a really hard thing for me, Not to hold

483
00:24:30,440 --> 00:24:34,600
Speaker 7: on to someone else's trauma or experience, is because I

484
00:24:34,640 --> 00:24:38,119
Speaker 7: want to be a fixer, and it's just I can't

485
00:24:38,119 --> 00:24:41,480
Speaker 7: fix anyone if I have nothing to give, even myself.

486
00:24:41,720 --> 00:24:45,120
Speaker 1: Well, I think too if something's like because I early on,

487
00:24:45,480 --> 00:24:51,000
Speaker 1: when like my ex husband cheated a bunch, I started

488
00:24:51,000 --> 00:24:53,760
Speaker 1: helping some women that had come into my DMS, and

489
00:24:53,840 --> 00:24:55,840
Speaker 1: because I wanted to help, but then I realized, I

490
00:24:55,840 --> 00:24:58,439
Speaker 1: was like, this is actually triggering me more because I

491
00:24:58,480 --> 00:25:02,040
Speaker 1: still have so much on healed trauma from it that

492
00:25:02,320 --> 00:25:05,320
Speaker 1: I I'm now going to be I'm doing a disservice

493
00:25:05,320 --> 00:25:08,199
Speaker 1: to myself. But by talking to the women that like

494
00:25:08,280 --> 00:25:10,280
Speaker 1: he's either hurt or or that hurt some you know

495
00:25:10,320 --> 00:25:12,200
Speaker 1: that hurt them. So it's like I just I can't,

496
00:25:12,280 --> 00:25:15,040
Speaker 1: I can't do this anymore. And then now I've kind

497
00:25:15,040 --> 00:25:17,080
Speaker 1: of started to help you know, a few more people,

498
00:25:18,040 --> 00:25:20,000
Speaker 1: but more so, but I keep more of like an

499
00:25:20,119 --> 00:25:22,560
Speaker 1: arm's length because I'm like I I still notice the

500
00:25:22,600 --> 00:25:25,440
Speaker 1: triggers that come up still to this day.

501
00:25:26,400 --> 00:25:27,160
Speaker 10: Yeah, for sure.

502
00:25:27,240 --> 00:25:31,720
Speaker 7: Like I I interesting enough, I was in a very

503
00:25:31,760 --> 00:25:35,280
Speaker 7: abusive relationship when I was younger, and I really thought

504
00:25:35,400 --> 00:25:40,320
Speaker 7: that I had overcame it, and like I've I've had

505
00:25:40,359 --> 00:25:40,960
Speaker 7: a lot of trauma.

506
00:25:41,000 --> 00:25:43,920
Speaker 10: I lost a lot of friends to murder, to suicide.

507
00:25:44,440 --> 00:25:46,840
Speaker 7: I had like a high gang violence area. So it

508
00:25:46,920 --> 00:25:50,640
Speaker 7: was really like, you survived, That's what your main goal

509
00:25:50,760 --> 00:25:53,080
Speaker 7: was to do. And I thought I had really worked

510
00:25:53,119 --> 00:25:56,960
Speaker 7: on a lot of it, and then someone brought up

511
00:25:56,960 --> 00:26:01,760
Speaker 7: my abuser's name and I literally went into trauma, like

512
00:26:01,960 --> 00:26:04,720
Speaker 7: I was like back in that place, and this wasn't

513
00:26:04,760 --> 00:26:07,200
Speaker 7: too long ago, a couple of weeks ago, and I

514
00:26:07,320 --> 00:26:10,879
Speaker 7: was just shaking and shivering and I'm and I hadn't

515
00:26:11,119 --> 00:26:14,119
Speaker 7: experienced that, so that was like totally new to me.

516
00:26:14,760 --> 00:26:17,320
Speaker 7: And I, you know, luckily was able to get a

517
00:26:17,320 --> 00:26:20,399
Speaker 7: hold of my therapist and she's like she kind of

518
00:26:20,440 --> 00:26:23,680
Speaker 7: guided me through a little bit of it. But there's

519
00:26:24,200 --> 00:26:27,439
Speaker 7: there has to be accessibility for some of these people.

520
00:26:27,880 --> 00:26:30,360
Speaker 7: You know, there is a suicide prevention hotline that does

521
00:26:30,400 --> 00:26:33,720
Speaker 7: really well, not saying anybody you're speaking to is suicidal,

522
00:26:33,760 --> 00:26:38,120
Speaker 7: over cheating, but it does it abuses you in more

523
00:26:38,160 --> 00:26:41,040
Speaker 7: ways than just the action of what they have done.

524
00:26:41,119 --> 00:26:43,320
Speaker 10: It like it like.

525
00:26:45,160 --> 00:26:48,359
Speaker 7: It makes you feel less valuable when you're not the

526
00:26:48,400 --> 00:26:52,640
Speaker 7: actual one who's doing things that are in like wrong

527
00:26:52,720 --> 00:26:55,280
Speaker 7: or whatever. But that's my opinion because I was cheated

528
00:26:55,280 --> 00:26:58,720
Speaker 7: on too massively by the physical abuse er.

529
00:27:00,000 --> 00:27:00,800
Speaker 5: I like to do both.

530
00:27:01,880 --> 00:27:14,119
Speaker 1: Yeah, Jordan says, how to be happy?

531
00:27:14,160 --> 00:27:16,960
Speaker 5: Struggling to wake up and feel happy lately? What helps you?

532
00:27:17,680 --> 00:27:20,720
Speaker 1: I honestly the I go to gratefulness as much as

533
00:27:20,720 --> 00:27:23,520
Speaker 1: I can. I'm like, okay, yeah, that's yeah, that's been

534
00:27:23,560 --> 00:27:26,480
Speaker 1: something that's been helpful. Are you guys going to have

535
00:27:26,520 --> 00:27:28,360
Speaker 1: something like that on on there too?

536
00:27:28,440 --> 00:27:28,640
Speaker 10: Yeah?

537
00:27:28,680 --> 00:27:31,760
Speaker 7: I mean thinking more of like the positive out of

538
00:27:31,800 --> 00:27:35,440
Speaker 7: the negative. You know, whatever the situation is is always

539
00:27:35,480 --> 00:27:40,200
Speaker 7: helpful sometimes, Like getting out of bed and even showering

540
00:27:40,560 --> 00:27:44,120
Speaker 7: is a mission for me. Like if I I don't

541
00:27:44,119 --> 00:27:47,080
Speaker 7: think I've blow dried my own hair in like six

542
00:27:47,160 --> 00:27:50,200
Speaker 7: months while I was like in the hospital and going

543
00:27:50,240 --> 00:27:53,919
Speaker 7: through all that and all this other stuff, and and

544
00:27:54,000 --> 00:27:56,120
Speaker 7: like I go get it blown out, and that makes

545
00:27:56,160 --> 00:28:00,840
Speaker 7: me feel better. And I always like want to be

546
00:28:00,920 --> 00:28:04,000
Speaker 7: going and going and doing something, so me getting my

547
00:28:04,080 --> 00:28:06,600
Speaker 7: nails done or me getting my hair done, it's like

548
00:28:06,880 --> 00:28:08,560
Speaker 7: I don't care about it because I don't feel like

549
00:28:08,600 --> 00:28:11,560
Speaker 7: I'm changing the world or doing something more important. But

550
00:28:11,720 --> 00:28:15,920
Speaker 7: self care is so important to get up and look

551
00:28:16,000 --> 00:28:21,119
Speaker 7: forward to a massage or even like, like, what I

552
00:28:21,200 --> 00:28:23,000
Speaker 7: do when I have a hard time getting out of

553
00:28:23,000 --> 00:28:26,040
Speaker 7: bed is I've created a routine where I get up

554
00:28:26,080 --> 00:28:28,439
Speaker 7: at five point thirty, I put on one of my

555
00:28:29,960 --> 00:28:33,280
Speaker 7: true crying podcasts, and I drive to Starbucks, get my

556
00:28:33,400 --> 00:28:35,800
Speaker 7: Starbucks And the fact that I just got out of

557
00:28:35,840 --> 00:28:38,040
Speaker 7: the house makes me not want to go back in

558
00:28:38,040 --> 00:28:40,240
Speaker 7: the house and shut it up. And that is that's

559
00:28:40,240 --> 00:28:42,239
Speaker 7: the hard part. That's the hard part, getting out of

560
00:28:42,560 --> 00:28:45,080
Speaker 7: your comfort because my comfort is my bed and the

561
00:28:45,120 --> 00:28:48,479
Speaker 7: shade shut and it just has always been that, So

562
00:28:49,400 --> 00:28:52,520
Speaker 7: you do have to put some force behind it. But

563
00:28:52,760 --> 00:28:56,480
Speaker 7: I also hope that wonder Mine can help people understand

564
00:28:56,560 --> 00:28:59,680
Speaker 7: what is keeping them in bed? What is keeping what

565
00:28:59,840 --> 00:29:03,520
Speaker 7: is what is the root of the problem that can

566
00:29:03,640 --> 00:29:10,080
Speaker 7: be corrected with something that is not necessarily like medication.

567
00:29:10,200 --> 00:29:12,959
Speaker 7: And I'm not anti medication. It saved my life, but

568
00:29:13,160 --> 00:29:17,120
Speaker 7: it's also not for everybody. So what works for me

569
00:29:17,320 --> 00:29:20,280
Speaker 7: is not going to work for maybe you two. So

570
00:29:20,680 --> 00:29:24,520
Speaker 7: I just feel like that's what's important is people getting

571
00:29:25,200 --> 00:29:26,560
Speaker 7: the connecting.

572
00:29:27,600 --> 00:29:31,200
Speaker 10: Mindset with your body. Yeah, and because we are so

573
00:29:31,320 --> 00:29:33,520
Speaker 10: disconnected and so on social media.

574
00:29:33,880 --> 00:29:36,479
Speaker 7: And I've gone sixty days without my phone and I

575
00:29:36,520 --> 00:29:38,040
Speaker 7: did not miss it for five seconds.

576
00:29:39,200 --> 00:29:40,960
Speaker 10: It was amazing, says.

577
00:29:41,080 --> 00:29:43,640
Speaker 1: And as a mom, you know, obviously you know your

578
00:29:43,720 --> 00:29:48,680
Speaker 1: daughter has been very vocal about you know, bipolar and

579
00:29:48,760 --> 00:29:53,880
Speaker 1: her mental health, and how do you how do you

580
00:29:53,920 --> 00:29:58,440
Speaker 1: continue to support and be there for Like someone had asked,

581
00:29:58,480 --> 00:30:00,840
Speaker 1: as a parent, how can you your daughter who has

582
00:30:00,840 --> 00:30:01,760
Speaker 1: bipolar disorder?

583
00:30:01,800 --> 00:30:02,880
Speaker 5: Because I feel helpless.

584
00:30:04,080 --> 00:30:06,200
Speaker 7: It is it's a very helpless feeling because you will

585
00:30:06,480 --> 00:30:09,160
Speaker 7: you just automatically want to take the pain away. But

586
00:30:10,640 --> 00:30:13,320
Speaker 7: what I have found because we've gone through our ups

587
00:30:13,320 --> 00:30:16,160
Speaker 7: and downs with my mental health and her mental health,

588
00:30:16,200 --> 00:30:21,560
Speaker 7: and how we reacted and we would do conversations together,

589
00:30:22,520 --> 00:30:26,600
Speaker 7: like not necessarily family therapy, but like try to you know,

590
00:30:26,680 --> 00:30:29,479
Speaker 7: the older she got, the easier was. But you know,

591
00:30:29,640 --> 00:30:34,480
Speaker 7: she's been in facilities a few times, and I've learned.

592
00:30:35,400 --> 00:30:38,000
Speaker 7: I've learned to be the mother she needs instead of

593
00:30:38,000 --> 00:30:41,000
Speaker 7: the mother I want to be. And so I would

594
00:30:41,080 --> 00:30:44,840
Speaker 7: learn like like things like you know, because I needed

595
00:30:45,080 --> 00:30:48,640
Speaker 7: a parent that was a hard ass and supported me

596
00:30:49,200 --> 00:30:52,040
Speaker 7: and like my parents were always working, and so I

597
00:30:52,080 --> 00:30:55,040
Speaker 7: would protect her to a fault and didn't let her

598
00:30:55,080 --> 00:30:57,960
Speaker 7: grow up. And then and it's still hard, but I

599
00:30:58,000 --> 00:31:01,560
Speaker 7: had to retrain, like I'm like, what do you need

600
00:31:02,080 --> 00:31:05,440
Speaker 7: from me? If you don't need me asking you twenty questions,

601
00:31:05,680 --> 00:31:07,440
Speaker 7: then I won't ask you twenty questions.

602
00:31:07,680 --> 00:31:09,320
Speaker 10: And then let's get through this moment.

603
00:31:09,520 --> 00:31:12,360
Speaker 7: And then I find most of the times they just

604
00:31:12,640 --> 00:31:13,320
Speaker 7: they just want.

605
00:31:13,120 --> 00:31:13,600
Speaker 10: To be held.

606
00:31:14,200 --> 00:31:16,720
Speaker 7: They truly do, even if they start punching you and

607
00:31:16,800 --> 00:31:20,560
Speaker 7: kicking you, holding them just put them in such a

608
00:31:20,600 --> 00:31:25,040
Speaker 7: peaceful place. So, you know, we have been through a

609
00:31:25,080 --> 00:31:28,280
Speaker 7: lot with that and me thinking I had bipolar.

610
00:31:28,320 --> 00:31:29,640
Speaker 10: I thought I understood her.

611
00:31:29,960 --> 00:31:33,520
Speaker 7: In reality, I was understanding what I read in books,

612
00:31:33,560 --> 00:31:37,480
Speaker 7: which does not qualify me to, you know, like talk.

613
00:31:37,320 --> 00:31:39,040
Speaker 10: To her therapeutically.

614
00:31:39,600 --> 00:31:45,040
Speaker 7: So we had to learn with our like like I

615
00:31:45,160 --> 00:31:48,240
Speaker 7: know when I don't hear from her for a couple

616
00:31:48,280 --> 00:31:51,200
Speaker 7: of days on text, I know she's needing a minute,

617
00:31:51,720 --> 00:31:52,960
Speaker 7: you know, Whereas.

618
00:31:52,600 --> 00:31:54,640
Speaker 10: Before I would blow her up and like are you okay?

619
00:31:54,640 --> 00:31:56,640
Speaker 10: Are you okay? Like where are you?

620
00:31:56,640 --> 00:32:00,480
Speaker 7: You know, because she's a celebrity, so I get freaked

621
00:32:00,520 --> 00:32:03,680
Speaker 7: out about Luckily, sometimes there's just pictures every day of

622
00:32:03,680 --> 00:32:05,200
Speaker 7: what she's doing and I know where she is.

623
00:32:05,520 --> 00:32:08,760
Speaker 10: But like you know, most parents don't have that luxury.

624
00:32:09,080 --> 00:32:11,520
Speaker 10: So but like I had to learn to.

625
00:32:13,200 --> 00:32:18,360
Speaker 7: Not always like talk about it in a medicinal way

626
00:32:18,560 --> 00:32:22,080
Speaker 7: and talk about it in an emotional supportive way and.

627
00:32:22,640 --> 00:32:24,800
Speaker 10: Just say what do you need? Like what do you

628
00:32:24,880 --> 00:32:25,520
Speaker 10: need from me?

629
00:32:26,280 --> 00:32:28,280
Speaker 7: And sometimes they need peace, Sometimes they need you to

630
00:32:28,320 --> 00:32:31,200
Speaker 7: hear them. Sometimes they need a hug. Sometimes I'll say

631
00:32:31,520 --> 00:32:34,280
Speaker 7: off like it, but they need to say that, and

632
00:32:34,320 --> 00:32:37,600
Speaker 7: then you come back and they usually apologize, and like

633
00:32:37,680 --> 00:32:39,200
Speaker 7: this is where my head's faces.

634
00:32:39,480 --> 00:32:40,040
Speaker 10: So it does.

635
00:32:40,120 --> 00:32:44,120
Speaker 7: It just takes time to kind of really understand each other.

636
00:32:44,360 --> 00:32:47,400
Speaker 7: And I do feel like a lot of that fault

637
00:32:47,680 --> 00:32:50,680
Speaker 7: was me not mothering my child the way she needed.

638
00:32:51,800 --> 00:32:54,600
Speaker 1: Do you have because I'm just thinking that because I've

639
00:32:55,680 --> 00:32:57,960
Speaker 1: we both have kids, and my daughter she's she's about

640
00:32:58,240 --> 00:33:02,560
Speaker 1: to turn six, but I'm so fearful for the day

641
00:33:02,800 --> 00:33:04,880
Speaker 1: to be like, oh I wish I did that because

642
00:33:05,160 --> 00:33:07,920
Speaker 1: now I'm now I've screwed her up this way, or

643
00:33:07,960 --> 00:33:10,040
Speaker 1: I wrote her too much, or I was too hard

644
00:33:10,080 --> 00:33:13,000
Speaker 1: on her like the other day, Like it's I'm emotional.

645
00:33:13,080 --> 00:33:15,360
Speaker 1: I don't know why, but like like every time I

646
00:33:15,400 --> 00:33:17,760
Speaker 1: talk to my kids, I always never never want them

647
00:33:17,800 --> 00:33:21,400
Speaker 1: to like, you know, I don't want to screw them up.

648
00:33:21,440 --> 00:33:24,000
Speaker 1: But like I was like writing her on her freaking

649
00:33:24,120 --> 00:33:26,280
Speaker 1: sight words, and I'm like, Jolie, like how why are

650
00:33:26,320 --> 00:33:28,520
Speaker 1: you saying? Do there's no like when there's an M

651
00:33:28,720 --> 00:33:30,880
Speaker 1: like it's me. It was like and I was like,

652
00:33:30,920 --> 00:33:32,680
Speaker 1: oh my god, Jana, And then I started like crying

653
00:33:32,680 --> 00:33:34,120
Speaker 1: because I was like, what is wrong with you? Like

654
00:33:34,120 --> 00:33:36,720
Speaker 1: stop writing there freaking five year old you know what

655
00:33:36,720 --> 00:33:38,600
Speaker 1: I mean about her sight words? Like she's gonna she's

656
00:33:38,600 --> 00:33:40,760
Speaker 1: gonna read in her time. But like then I'm like,

657
00:33:40,800 --> 00:33:42,240
Speaker 1: am I being too hard on her? Like is this

658
00:33:42,320 --> 00:33:44,520
Speaker 1: going to cause this? Or like or if I'm a

659
00:33:44,560 --> 00:33:47,240
Speaker 1: not hotter earner, she's gonna be too soft or I'm like,

660
00:33:47,280 --> 00:33:48,200
Speaker 1: oh sorry.

661
00:33:47,920 --> 00:33:48,480
Speaker 4: I'll do that.

662
00:33:49,720 --> 00:33:51,760
Speaker 10: No, no, no, we do, we all all do it. I

663
00:33:51,840 --> 00:33:55,440
Speaker 10: prois my husband more than me. I'm kind of like

664
00:33:55,480 --> 00:33:56,360
Speaker 10: a hippie parent.

665
00:33:56,520 --> 00:34:02,440
Speaker 7: But with I, I mean, do you feel like this

666
00:34:02,640 --> 00:34:08,160
Speaker 7: was maybe something that is insecure about your your own

667
00:34:08,239 --> 00:34:09,280
Speaker 7: self that you write?

668
00:34:09,320 --> 00:34:12,239
Speaker 1: So yeah, I always I always reflect that because it's

669
00:34:12,280 --> 00:34:14,239
Speaker 1: always like, Okay, if I'm feeling something, it's because I

670
00:34:14,280 --> 00:34:16,440
Speaker 1: have to like what what is unresolved in me? Or

671
00:34:16,480 --> 00:34:18,239
Speaker 1: what is like what do I need to reflect back?

672
00:34:18,280 --> 00:34:22,120
Speaker 1: And I think I'm so afraid of failing.

673
00:34:23,680 --> 00:34:28,239
Speaker 7: Yeah yeah, but look, you're raising two beautiful kids. So

674
00:34:28,800 --> 00:34:31,640
Speaker 7: how you're feeling applaud I heard you actually.

675
00:34:31,600 --> 00:34:33,240
Speaker 10: Doing a movie, you got.

676
00:34:33,840 --> 00:34:38,279
Speaker 7: Podcast, and you love your parents. I mean, you love

677
00:34:38,280 --> 00:34:40,279
Speaker 7: your kids. I don't know if you love your parents.

678
00:34:41,480 --> 00:34:42,960
Speaker 5: Scre me up, but I love you.

679
00:34:42,960 --> 00:34:47,799
Speaker 7: You know. It's like it's but you know, it's I

680
00:34:47,800 --> 00:34:52,120
Speaker 7: think we are as parents really really hard on ourselves

681
00:34:52,160 --> 00:34:54,879
Speaker 7: and with if if you're asking me if I had

682
00:34:54,880 --> 00:35:00,319
Speaker 7: that moment with Selena, I do feel like when was

683
00:35:00,360 --> 00:35:04,320
Speaker 7: getting in her twenties and I was still managing her.

684
00:35:05,200 --> 00:35:09,840
Speaker 7: Our family was so because managers know everything about their kids,

685
00:35:10,280 --> 00:35:12,960
Speaker 7: I mean, their their talent, and so I was coming

686
00:35:13,000 --> 00:35:16,000
Speaker 7: to the point where if she did something silly or

687
00:35:16,719 --> 00:35:20,600
Speaker 7: you know, controversial or whatever, like you want as a manager,

688
00:35:20,640 --> 00:35:21,759
Speaker 7: it's your job to fix it.

689
00:35:22,239 --> 00:35:24,239
Speaker 10: But then I would go, Okay, as your mom, what

690
00:35:24,360 --> 00:35:25,400
Speaker 10: the were you thinking?

691
00:35:25,960 --> 00:35:29,919
Speaker 7: And so I regret those days, sure, you know, and

692
00:35:31,080 --> 00:35:33,680
Speaker 7: but like you know, raising a kid as hard anyways,

693
00:35:33,719 --> 00:35:35,959
Speaker 7: and you're raising one in Hollywood. It's like you don't

694
00:35:35,960 --> 00:35:39,239
Speaker 7: know what's right from wrong, and it's it's so.

695
00:35:40,280 --> 00:35:42,319
Speaker 10: I think we kind of all do it.

696
00:35:42,360 --> 00:35:45,080
Speaker 7: And maybe just the only advice I can really give

697
00:35:45,160 --> 00:35:48,360
Speaker 7: is I wish sometimes I listened more and wasn't so

698
00:35:48,560 --> 00:35:52,359
Speaker 7: laxidaisal with her and certain things. You know, she came

699
00:35:52,400 --> 00:35:54,120
Speaker 7: in one day and she's like, I did this, and

700
00:35:54,160 --> 00:35:56,719
Speaker 7: I was like, uh, because I knew how to do,

701
00:35:56,800 --> 00:35:58,200
Speaker 7: We'll deal with it the next day. And I was like,

702
00:35:58,239 --> 00:36:00,520
Speaker 7: we'll talk about this in the morning. And then through

703
00:36:00,560 --> 00:36:04,359
Speaker 7: therapy I found out that that literally broke her heart.

704
00:36:05,120 --> 00:36:07,600
Speaker 7: I was like, and it was weird because I remembered

705
00:36:07,600 --> 00:36:10,640
Speaker 7: that moment, but at that moment it didn't seem that

706
00:36:10,800 --> 00:36:14,360
Speaker 7: important to me. And also she always felt like she

707
00:36:14,440 --> 00:36:18,520
Speaker 7: had to try harder because I would never make a

708
00:36:18,560 --> 00:36:21,680
Speaker 7: big deal out of awards, like because I didn't want

709
00:36:21,680 --> 00:36:24,359
Speaker 7: her to think that that's what matters. So in my mind,

710
00:36:24,400 --> 00:36:27,759
Speaker 7: not doing something great wow, But in her mind, she's like,

711
00:36:27,840 --> 00:36:29,800
Speaker 7: I got to push further or my mom's not proud

712
00:36:29,840 --> 00:36:30,040
Speaker 7: of me.

713
00:36:30,360 --> 00:36:31,719
Speaker 10: I had no idea this was going on.

714
00:36:32,400 --> 00:36:35,560
Speaker 7: So that was you know, that was something that we

715
00:36:35,640 --> 00:36:38,719
Speaker 7: learned through communications. So I mean, all you can really

716
00:36:38,760 --> 00:36:41,560
Speaker 7: do is just listen. I mean, we're bound to mess

717
00:36:41,640 --> 00:36:44,000
Speaker 7: up somehow or.

718
00:36:44,200 --> 00:36:47,360
Speaker 1: That's so crazy, like it makes so much like you

719
00:36:48,040 --> 00:36:49,400
Speaker 1: doing what you should.

720
00:36:49,600 --> 00:36:51,719
Speaker 4: Yeah, but then it's how they take it and what

721
00:36:51,880 --> 00:36:53,919
Speaker 4: they want. I mean that's hard.

722
00:36:54,040 --> 00:36:55,920
Speaker 1: I mean that's so because I and then you wouldn't.

723
00:36:55,920 --> 00:36:57,360
Speaker 1: I would never have thought that that she would have

724
00:36:57,400 --> 00:36:59,640
Speaker 1: thought like, oh, I need to do get this award

725
00:36:59,680 --> 00:37:01,759
Speaker 1: because then maybe my mom will like be excited or

726
00:37:01,760 --> 00:37:03,840
Speaker 1: happy about it like that, because I would do exactly

727
00:37:03,880 --> 00:37:05,480
Speaker 1: what you would have done, and that then like.

728
00:37:06,400 --> 00:37:08,920
Speaker 10: I'd be like, oh, that's awesome, and then like.

729
00:37:08,960 --> 00:37:10,400
Speaker 5: The next conversation happened.

730
00:37:10,520 --> 00:37:14,480
Speaker 7: Yeah, there she was wanting me to be like, you know,

731
00:37:14,680 --> 00:37:17,759
Speaker 7: super proud of her. So now I've I've learned that

732
00:37:18,040 --> 00:37:22,120
Speaker 7: and I am proud of her. And so I've just

733
00:37:22,200 --> 00:37:24,720
Speaker 7: learned that I need to reach out when moments happen

734
00:37:24,800 --> 00:37:27,960
Speaker 7: that I know are milestones and let her know I'm

735
00:37:27,960 --> 00:37:31,080
Speaker 7: proud of her, you know, because they obviously mean something

736
00:37:31,120 --> 00:37:33,239
Speaker 7: to her, and I just never wanted that to be

737
00:37:33,280 --> 00:37:33,960
Speaker 7: her value.

738
00:37:34,440 --> 00:37:35,720
Speaker 6: Yeah for award.

739
00:37:36,160 --> 00:37:39,800
Speaker 1: So when our listeners go to wondermind dot com, I

740
00:37:39,880 --> 00:37:42,160
Speaker 1: know it officially launches in February, but what is there

741
00:37:42,200 --> 00:37:44,799
Speaker 1: anything there that they can see now or is there

742
00:37:44,880 --> 00:37:47,040
Speaker 1: like an email thing to like get them when.

743
00:37:46,920 --> 00:37:48,480
Speaker 10: It Yeah, you can definitely.

744
00:37:48,520 --> 00:37:52,359
Speaker 7: When you go to wondermine dot com, there is a

745
00:37:52,360 --> 00:37:54,680
Speaker 7: at the very first page where you can put your

746
00:37:54,719 --> 00:37:58,200
Speaker 7: email that we can give you updates on okay, and

747
00:37:58,239 --> 00:38:03,120
Speaker 7: then eventually they're well and then there's you know, our bios,

748
00:38:03,360 --> 00:38:06,759
Speaker 7: which aren't very exciting, but you will be updated on

749
00:38:07,400 --> 00:38:10,040
Speaker 7: like when the podcast states are set, and then we

750
00:38:10,080 --> 00:38:14,040
Speaker 7: can start spending daily content and like in February, so

751
00:38:14,440 --> 00:38:17,280
Speaker 7: roughly some of that is like where we're kind of looking.

752
00:38:17,680 --> 00:38:19,919
Speaker 7: The product will be down the line because that's got

753
00:38:19,960 --> 00:38:25,160
Speaker 7: a lot of responsibility, and but yeah, we're we're really

754
00:38:25,200 --> 00:38:30,879
Speaker 7: excited to to explore the space and try to make

755
00:38:31,000 --> 00:38:35,839
Speaker 7: like something that should have been done decades ago.

756
00:38:36,040 --> 00:38:40,600
Speaker 5: For sure. Well, I mean I hate that we all

757
00:38:40,640 --> 00:38:41,239
Speaker 5: go through things.

758
00:38:41,280 --> 00:38:43,919
Speaker 1: But at the same time, you're, you know, Selena, you

759
00:38:43,920 --> 00:38:46,640
Speaker 1: you guys are using a platform to help other people,

760
00:38:46,840 --> 00:38:49,719
Speaker 1: and so you know, thank you for that, thank you

761
00:38:49,800 --> 00:38:53,080
Speaker 1: for you know, continuing and you must be so proud

762
00:38:53,080 --> 00:38:54,719
Speaker 1: because of that too, you know, and I hope you

763
00:38:54,760 --> 00:38:56,560
Speaker 1: know that you're going to be helping a lot of people,

764
00:38:56,680 --> 00:38:58,600
Speaker 1: So thank you for doing what you do and to

765
00:38:58,640 --> 00:39:00,680
Speaker 1: help all the listeners go to wonder Mind so you

766
00:39:00,680 --> 00:39:05,640
Speaker 1: can get all the latest stuff info when it starts

767
00:39:05,680 --> 00:39:08,279
Speaker 1: officially lunching. So thank you Mandy so much.

768
00:39:08,800 --> 00:39:10,160
Speaker 10: Thank you, thank you.

769
00:39:10,480 --> 00:39:12,600
Speaker 5: Nice to be nice to meet you too, Honey. Well

770
00:39:12,640 --> 00:39:15,759
Speaker 5: that was good. God. Parenting stuff is so hard, so hard.

771
00:39:15,880 --> 00:39:19,719
Speaker 1: I since I was an emotional train, I'll continue the train.

772
00:39:19,800 --> 00:39:22,000
Speaker 1: I walked out to the bus stop. This is probably

773
00:39:22,080 --> 00:39:24,160
Speaker 1: like a week or so ago, and one of the

774
00:39:24,200 --> 00:39:26,240
Speaker 1: moms was like, are you okay? And I just started

775
00:39:26,360 --> 00:39:29,719
Speaker 1: crying and I was like, I just yelled so hard

776
00:39:29,760 --> 00:39:31,880
Speaker 1: at Jolie that now I'm like, now she's gonna go

777
00:39:31,880 --> 00:39:33,640
Speaker 1: to school and thinks she's like a bad girl. And

778
00:39:33,680 --> 00:39:36,480
Speaker 1: I apologize to her, but I was just so fed up.

779
00:39:36,800 --> 00:39:40,120
Speaker 1: Jolie and Jays were like, you know, screaming and fighting

780
00:39:40,160 --> 00:39:42,680
Speaker 1: with each other, and I was like stop because I

781
00:39:42,719 --> 00:39:45,000
Speaker 1: was just like couldn't like. I just was like and

782
00:39:45,080 --> 00:39:47,479
Speaker 1: I felt awful, and they were just like.

783
00:39:48,000 --> 00:39:49,200
Speaker 5: Won't be the last time you do that?

784
00:39:49,400 --> 00:39:50,560
Speaker 10: Nope?

785
00:39:50,760 --> 00:39:53,239
Speaker 4: But I was like, I feel there and that the

786
00:39:53,320 --> 00:39:55,160
Speaker 4: last time you'll cry about it either. I cry pretty

787
00:39:55,200 --> 00:39:57,320
Speaker 4: much every time I get mad at my good.

788
00:39:57,200 --> 00:39:59,800
Speaker 2: But we always tell people don't beat yourself up. Everyone

789
00:39:59,880 --> 00:40:01,399
Speaker 2: know said it happens to all of us. But I'm

790
00:40:01,440 --> 00:40:03,719
Speaker 2: as bad as anybody. I'm totally beating myself up for

791
00:40:03,760 --> 00:40:04,240
Speaker 2: that stuff.

792
00:40:04,320 --> 00:40:06,520
Speaker 4: I think it's apologizing that's really important.

793
00:40:06,640 --> 00:40:08,160
Speaker 1: I mean I did, and I grabbed her and by

794
00:40:08,160 --> 00:40:10,040
Speaker 1: her little face, and I was like, Jolie, Mommy is

795
00:40:10,160 --> 00:40:12,920
Speaker 1: so sorry. Y'all those like it just really it frustrates

796
00:40:12,960 --> 00:40:16,040
Speaker 1: mommy when you don't listen, and I just like, I'm

797
00:40:16,080 --> 00:40:17,839
Speaker 1: so sorry because I don't do it a lot.

798
00:40:17,880 --> 00:40:19,880
Speaker 5: So when I do, they like, yeah.

799
00:40:21,120 --> 00:40:23,800
Speaker 3: Well that's good because then they will apologize in the

800
00:40:23,840 --> 00:40:25,359
Speaker 3: future when they make a mistake and they.

801
00:40:25,280 --> 00:40:31,120
Speaker 5: Are it may parenting, you, guys is so so hard. Well,

802
00:40:32,040 --> 00:40:33,319
Speaker 5: I think that's an episode.

803
00:40:34,120 --> 00:40:35,720
Speaker 2: Check check check.

804
00:40:35,920 --> 00:40:37,080
Speaker 5: Got the episode done?

805
00:40:38,200 --> 00:40:42,480
Speaker 1: Yeah all right, well I gotta do some Christmas shopping,

806
00:40:42,680 --> 00:40:45,000
Speaker 1: so I got to finish it up.

807
00:40:45,719 --> 00:40:47,840
Speaker 2: Got to overdo it and make everybody else feel guilty.

808
00:40:47,920 --> 00:40:52,320
Speaker 1: Yep. I really don't like I'm about to get a

809
00:40:52,600 --> 00:40:53,640
Speaker 1: You're so spoiled.

810
00:40:53,640 --> 00:40:56,320
Speaker 5: I'm like, I don't, actually, I just want Oh.

811
00:40:56,160 --> 00:40:59,319
Speaker 9: It's not it's not at all that you're spoiled at all,

812
00:40:59,440 --> 00:41:01,080
Speaker 9: Thank you, it's not at all you.

813
00:41:01,280 --> 00:41:03,640
Speaker 5: This is from Amazon it's fifteen dollars people.

814
00:41:03,440 --> 00:41:05,560
Speaker 4: It's not that, it's not about that, it's just.

815
00:41:06,680 --> 00:41:08,399
Speaker 6: You know, go to her Instagram for the link.

816
00:41:08,840 --> 00:41:11,080
Speaker 5: Yeah, exactly, thank you very much.

817
00:41:11,600 --> 00:41:14,080
Speaker 1: Later why she walked in earlier and I was like,

818
00:41:14,160 --> 00:41:15,719
Speaker 1: nice boots, and she's like, I got them from your page.

819
00:41:15,719 --> 00:41:17,960
Speaker 5: I was like, right, dsw they were like one hundred bucks.

820
00:41:18,000 --> 00:41:19,040
Speaker 4: Let's swipe up on all of it.

821
00:41:19,280 --> 00:41:25,960
Speaker 1: Yeah, or link and everything else is just TBD, TBD, okay,

822
00:41:26,520 --> 00:41:27,280
Speaker 1: I love you guys,