WEBVTT - Mid-Week Mom Chat: Romance post baby. 0:00:00.200 --> 0:00:04.680 Hey, hey, hey, So on this midweek mom chat, I 0:00:04.680 --> 0:00:08.000 am just going to answer questions because I asked, y'all, 0:00:08.039 --> 0:00:11.720 what do you want me to talk about? And a 0:00:11.720 --> 0:00:14.440 bunch of you all have questions, so let's just go 0:00:14.560 --> 0:00:17.599 through them question number one, and I get a lot 0:00:17.880 --> 0:00:21.040 of I get a lot of questions about this diet 0:00:21.120 --> 0:00:24.520 and exercise and when you allow yourself to splurge or 0:00:24.600 --> 0:00:29.680 eat out. Okay, So, as you guys know, I have 0:00:29.720 --> 0:00:33.080 been talking about a new system I've been doing this 0:00:33.159 --> 0:00:38.680 year called Profile by Sanford. And also, as y'all know, 0:00:38.840 --> 0:00:43.159 I've struggled with different like eating disorders, nothing ever crazy, 0:00:43.240 --> 0:00:47.520 but like I struggled with like being believing a little 0:00:47.520 --> 0:00:51.200 bit here and there. Um. I call it exercise interrexia, 0:00:51.360 --> 0:00:53.680 where you work out a ton to try to burn 0:00:53.680 --> 0:00:58.280 off all the calories that you eight um. Every diet 0:00:58.280 --> 0:01:03.480 in the world from Adkins which just like no carbs too, juice, 0:01:03.480 --> 0:01:08.520 cleanses too, vegetarian too, which is a great lifestyle. Actually 0:01:08.560 --> 0:01:10.560 pretty much try to eat vegetarian when I can. I 0:01:10.600 --> 0:01:13.080 eat meat too, but I just sometimes meat grosses me out. 0:01:13.160 --> 0:01:16.520 I just prefer the vegetarian lifestyle. But I've just done 0:01:16.560 --> 0:01:19.360 every fad diet that you could eat that cayenne pepper 0:01:19.560 --> 0:01:27.400 and like lemon and water juice cleans. I've done everything, 0:01:28.600 --> 0:01:36.440 diet pills, all the stuff. And I so once I 0:01:36.440 --> 0:01:41.160 got pregnant and had Sunny, I am really started to 0:01:41.160 --> 0:01:43.840 be my body differently, and I started realizing that my 0:01:43.880 --> 0:01:45.800 body is amazing, and then I'm getting to grow this 0:01:46.520 --> 0:01:49.760 life inside of me. And I didn't want to focus 0:01:49.920 --> 0:01:52.640 on body image because what was what I was doing 0:01:52.760 --> 0:01:56.800 was so spiritual and as also y'all know people who 0:01:56.800 --> 0:02:00.480 fought along with me on this journey. We tried to 0:02:00.480 --> 0:02:03.320 have a baby for like a year, and we went 0:02:03.320 --> 0:02:05.600 through miscarriages and stuff like that, and so like when 0:02:05.600 --> 0:02:07.800 I got pregnant, I was like, Okay, my body is amazing, 0:02:07.880 --> 0:02:11.080 Like I I really like I am so grateful for 0:02:11.120 --> 0:02:13.440 this opportunity, Like I do not want to be plagued 0:02:13.560 --> 0:02:18.240 by body image stuff and like miss this spiritual experience. 0:02:18.280 --> 0:02:22.760 So I really stopped dieting. And I had stopped writing 0:02:22.760 --> 0:02:25.880 before that because I just didn't want to just I 0:02:25.919 --> 0:02:30.480 couldn't do it anymore. Like I found how yoga that 0:02:30.480 --> 0:02:32.440 actually really helped me, to be honest with you, how 0:02:32.520 --> 0:02:36.280 yoga started transforming my mind my life and my body, 0:02:36.400 --> 0:02:38.400 and I started. It was first exercise I found that 0:02:38.440 --> 0:02:42.120 I loved. So that's something I would encourage you to do, 0:02:42.320 --> 0:02:44.839 is find an exercise that you actually love to do, 0:02:44.919 --> 0:02:48.640 even if it's just walking, because if you're making yourself 0:02:48.680 --> 0:02:50.840 like get on a treadmill and run, and you hate 0:02:50.880 --> 0:02:53.440 getting on a treadmill and running, then it's going to 0:02:53.480 --> 0:02:57.400 feel like work or torture. If you're making yourself go 0:02:57.440 --> 0:03:00.280 to the gym and do StairMaster and do eights and 0:03:00.280 --> 0:03:02.800 stuff and you hate it, then like it's gonna feel awful. 0:03:02.919 --> 0:03:05.959 So I would just find a way to move your 0:03:06.000 --> 0:03:08.840 body that you love. For me, it has been hard 0:03:08.960 --> 0:03:12.720 having since having Sunny to exercise just because my days 0:03:12.720 --> 0:03:16.400 are so jam packed, and I know all y'all's days 0:03:16.400 --> 0:03:18.360 are probably so jam packed, and it's so hard to 0:03:18.360 --> 0:03:20.639 find out to exercise, and when you do have a 0:03:20.680 --> 0:03:22.280 little bit of downtime, the last thing you want to 0:03:22.320 --> 0:03:25.040 do is to go exercise. But what I'm doing is walking, 0:03:26.120 --> 0:03:27.639 and my husband and I love to go for a walk, 0:03:27.760 --> 0:03:29.720 So Michael and I will go we'll go for like 0:03:29.760 --> 0:03:31.560 four mile walks, And we went for a four mile 0:03:31.639 --> 0:03:34.320 walk the other day with Sunny and the sunshine, and 0:03:34.440 --> 0:03:36.440 that is really what I love and you can get 0:03:36.440 --> 0:03:41.200 a great workout. So but I've been doing Profile by Sanford, 0:03:41.480 --> 0:03:45.440 which is this awesome company. I really really have enjoyed 0:03:45.480 --> 0:03:49.280 working with them because they taylor make a program for 0:03:49.360 --> 0:03:56.080 you based on your lifestyle and your goals and what 0:03:56.320 --> 0:03:59.520 is really achievable for you. Not like that's another thing, 0:03:59.560 --> 0:04:01.400 like I'm not trying to set myself out for failure 0:04:01.440 --> 0:04:04.280 this year. I don't want to have all these goals 0:04:04.280 --> 0:04:08.840 that I can't keep because there's there they're too hard 0:04:08.880 --> 0:04:10.280 for me to keep at this point in my life. 0:04:10.320 --> 0:04:15.200 Like I know, right now in my life, I taking 0:04:15.240 --> 0:04:18.440 care of Sonny, keeping this house going, keeping all her 0:04:18.560 --> 0:04:23.000 needs met, keeping all my needs, Michael's needs met, running 0:04:23.040 --> 0:04:27.280 my podcast, running my business, which is just me and 0:04:27.480 --> 0:04:29.800 it's a lot like I am actually about to start 0:04:29.800 --> 0:04:31.440 trying to get to try to get a little help, 0:04:31.480 --> 0:04:33.680 try to try to have a part time someone help 0:04:33.720 --> 0:04:38.280 me with social media and UM content creating. So if 0:04:38.320 --> 0:04:40.360 y'all act, if any of you guys are good at 0:04:40.400 --> 0:04:46.159 content creating and running websites and YouTube and UM editing videos, 0:04:46.200 --> 0:04:48.599 please email me. I'm looking for someone to help me 0:04:48.600 --> 0:04:52.680 a little bit part time in Nashville and take pictures anyway. 0:04:52.720 --> 0:04:56.120 But I like profile by Sandford because I went in 0:04:56.160 --> 0:04:57.960 there and I was like, listen, I and you get 0:04:57.960 --> 0:05:00.799 a coach every week. My coach is Colleen and she's awesome. 0:05:00.839 --> 0:05:04.480 I love her and we actually have like therapy sessions together. 0:05:05.360 --> 0:05:09.520 She's great. Um. I was like, listen, I've had a 0:05:09.560 --> 0:05:11.839 bad relationship with food in my past, and whereas like 0:05:12.279 --> 0:05:14.760 certain foods are bad, certain foods are good. You can't 0:05:14.800 --> 0:05:16.800 eat this, you can only eat this. You gotta work 0:05:16.839 --> 0:05:19.800 out diet diet, diet, diet, die diet diet, and I'm 0:05:19.839 --> 0:05:21.599 not trying to live that life. And she was like, 0:05:21.600 --> 0:05:25.120 I totally hear you. We don't do diets here. It's 0:05:25.120 --> 0:05:30.120 all about helping yourself just make healthy choices and come 0:05:30.200 --> 0:05:32.880 up with good eating plans. They have amazing shakes that 0:05:33.000 --> 0:05:36.159 I love, so if you're ever starving or in a bind, 0:05:36.240 --> 0:05:37.680 I just make one of these shakes and they have 0:05:38.000 --> 0:05:40.720 tons of flavors like strawberry and the banana cream pie 0:05:40.839 --> 0:05:43.479 and it's great and like Quinn, it like gets that 0:05:43.800 --> 0:05:48.440 um sweet tooth craving. And they just like go through 0:05:48.800 --> 0:05:52.359 each week meal plans and like talk about your cravings 0:05:52.360 --> 0:05:54.560 and what you want and come up with better options 0:05:54.600 --> 0:06:01.440 instead of eating a kitcat bar, eat a shake or make, um, 0:06:01.560 --> 0:06:04.680 what is that kind of putting with the the chiese 0:06:04.680 --> 0:06:07.720 seed puttings or have some oat milk or make I mean, 0:06:07.880 --> 0:06:09.760 just like they help you come up with plants, and 0:06:09.760 --> 0:06:13.720 then they also pre made food and bars and all 0:06:13.720 --> 0:06:17.600 sorts of stuff. I've really enjoyed it, so y'all check 0:06:17.680 --> 0:06:22.599 them out. Profile by Stanford UM. I have a on 0:06:22.720 --> 0:06:27.120 my highlight reel on my um Instagram. I have a 0:06:27.279 --> 0:06:29.640 thing that says profile, So if you are wanting to 0:06:29.640 --> 0:06:32.960 follow along with my journey, check that out. But I 0:06:33.040 --> 0:06:36.040 really enjoyed that. And they're also encouraging me callings, encouraging 0:06:36.080 --> 0:06:39.039 me to exercise and just don't do anything I can't do, 0:06:39.080 --> 0:06:41.479 because I was like, I can't go four times a week. 0:06:41.520 --> 0:06:43.680 I can't, like at this point in my life, I 0:06:43.800 --> 0:06:46.120 just don't have the energy for it. I don't have 0:06:46.160 --> 0:06:47.960 the time for it. I'm not gonna leave sunny. We 0:06:48.000 --> 0:06:49.680 have the pellets on bike and I've got to start 0:06:49.720 --> 0:06:52.000 doing that because I do love it. But I'm just 0:06:52.400 --> 0:06:54.560 tired and I'm not trying to make an excuse but 0:06:54.600 --> 0:06:56.040 I am tired at the end of the day, and 0:06:56.080 --> 0:06:57.440 I know everyone is tired at the end of the 0:06:57.560 --> 0:07:01.240 day that i haven't wanted to exercise. So I've just 0:07:01.279 --> 0:07:04.760 started walking and I've loved that, and I've started adding 0:07:04.800 --> 0:07:07.040 in yoga. I went to hot Yoga last week and 0:07:07.080 --> 0:07:10.480 I'm trying to go once a week. Baby steps, baby 0:07:10.480 --> 0:07:12.920 steps back in And that's why I like Profile because 0:07:13.280 --> 0:07:16.760 Profile by Standford, the program, Profile by Sandford the program, 0:07:16.800 --> 0:07:19.840 because they just help me take help me, help me 0:07:19.880 --> 0:07:21.840 to take those baby steps, and they're not forcing me 0:07:21.880 --> 0:07:24.920 to like move at a pace that's too fast for 0:07:24.960 --> 0:07:27.040 me because right now I'm just working my way back 0:07:27.040 --> 0:07:33.120 into it. So I to answer your question, that was 0:07:33.160 --> 0:07:36.360 a long roundabout way to get to your question. I 0:07:36.440 --> 0:07:39.040 allow myself to splourage and eat on anytime I want to. 0:07:39.880 --> 0:07:42.720 I do not want. I mean I want to on 0:07:43.720 --> 0:07:47.239 the daily eat healthy. But if I am craving something, 0:07:47.240 --> 0:07:49.400 I'm gonna go have it. Like I'm not I'm not 0:07:49.480 --> 0:07:52.880 going to live my life in deprivation. If there's another 0:07:52.960 --> 0:07:56.440 choice that does the trick, then that's healthy for me. 0:07:56.480 --> 0:07:58.040 I'm gonna go with that. But if I have to 0:07:58.080 --> 0:08:00.440 have a hot chocolate chip, cookie with ice cream. I'm 0:08:00.480 --> 0:08:02.040 not gonna say no, but I'm just gonna try to 0:08:02.080 --> 0:08:06.480 be reasonable about it. Um, I don't know, so that's 0:08:06.480 --> 0:08:07.920 how I'm doing it. I just don't want to put 0:08:07.920 --> 0:08:10.880 any pressure on myself or make myself feel bad, because 0:08:10.920 --> 0:08:13.240 I think when you start making yourself feel bad, then 0:08:13.240 --> 0:08:15.000 you're not enjoying what you're doing. And if you're gonna 0:08:15.000 --> 0:08:16.920 go ahead and eat the kickcat or the chocolate chip cookie, 0:08:16.920 --> 0:08:18.360 you might as well enjoy it and not feel bad. 0:08:18.640 --> 0:08:21.160 You know. I just don't over eat. I really, That's 0:08:21.160 --> 0:08:24.480 another thing. I used to overreach, binge and purge and 0:08:24.520 --> 0:08:26.640 all that, and like, I just do not overad anymore. 0:08:26.760 --> 0:08:28.920 Like when I'm full and full, I know I can 0:08:28.960 --> 0:08:30.600 have it again later, Like I don't have to eat 0:08:30.600 --> 0:08:35.959 the whole thing right now. UM relationships post baby, that's 0:08:35.960 --> 0:08:39.040 a great question. I mean, I think every relationship I 0:08:39.040 --> 0:08:42.600 have has changed post baby because my whole life has changed. 0:08:42.640 --> 0:08:46.800 I don't view life the same at all anymore. UM. Friendships. 0:08:46.840 --> 0:08:48.600 I used to be the friend that would if I 0:08:48.640 --> 0:08:53.680 got invited, I would go. UM. I loved social events. 0:08:53.679 --> 0:08:55.719 My husband and I are really social and we love 0:08:55.760 --> 0:08:59.600 going out and being involved with the community and all 0:08:59.600 --> 0:09:01.400 sorts of off and we still love that. But like, 0:09:02.200 --> 0:09:05.240 I don't know, after having Sunny, I don't want to leave, 0:09:05.360 --> 0:09:08.360 Like I still get anxiety leaving her the babysitter. I 0:09:08.400 --> 0:09:13.840 have several babysitters in our night nurse Paula from Nashville 0:09:13.840 --> 0:09:17.280 baby Boss, you'll check her out, Um that I trust, 0:09:17.400 --> 0:09:20.320 But still like I like being the one with Sunny. 0:09:20.440 --> 0:09:24.800 I like, I like being here and doing her routine 0:09:24.800 --> 0:09:26.800 with her and feeding her and playing with her and 0:09:27.320 --> 0:09:30.560 loving on her and having moments with her every day 0:09:30.640 --> 0:09:33.240 and putting her to sleep and giving her bath, Like 0:09:33.400 --> 0:09:35.360 I want to be that one to do that. And 0:09:35.440 --> 0:09:39.560 so I'm also like worried that you know, people don't 0:09:39.640 --> 0:09:40.839 other people are going to do it the way that 0:09:40.840 --> 0:09:42.920 I want to do it, or I don't know. I 0:09:42.960 --> 0:09:46.760 don't know. I just have that mama bird super protective 0:09:46.840 --> 0:09:48.720 vibea for her, which I think is normal and a 0:09:48.760 --> 0:09:52.160 lot of most moms haven't, especially new moms. So I, 0:09:52.280 --> 0:09:55.120 UM don't want to leave her. So for me to 0:09:55.280 --> 0:09:59.839 go somewhere and do something, it has to really, it 0:10:00.040 --> 0:10:04.439 has to really. Um, I'm very selective now, let's put 0:10:04.440 --> 0:10:06.960 it that way. He used to before I would go 0:10:07.000 --> 0:10:09.400 to lunch with friends all the time I was out 0:10:09.400 --> 0:10:11.600 and about doing everything, And now it's like, I'm not 0:10:11.720 --> 0:10:13.400 just gonna go have a casual lunch with a friend, 0:10:13.520 --> 0:10:15.280 Like if I haven't caught up with a friend in 0:10:15.320 --> 0:10:18.120 a long time and we need to catch up, or 0:10:18.120 --> 0:10:20.640 if there's something happening, if there's like a woman's group 0:10:20.720 --> 0:10:24.479 get together, that matters to me, Like I do prioritize 0:10:24.480 --> 0:10:26.559 that stuff because I do think it's important to keep 0:10:27.080 --> 0:10:31.280 your girlfriends and your friendships up and you stay connected, 0:10:31.320 --> 0:10:33.040 Like you don't want to get totally on an island 0:10:33.040 --> 0:10:36.839 where you're just all by yourself if you can help it, um, 0:10:36.880 --> 0:10:38.920 but even just a phone call, like I'll have phone 0:10:39.000 --> 0:10:41.840 dates now with people more, and because when Sunday's napping, 0:10:42.240 --> 0:10:44.600 I'll just call people on the phone or you know, 0:10:44.800 --> 0:10:46.720 just check it in that way, like you don't. I 0:10:46.880 --> 0:10:50.079 just every relationship has changed because Sunday is the priority 0:10:50.240 --> 0:10:52.960 she is, and like being here for her and being 0:10:53.000 --> 0:10:55.400 able to take care of her, and then I work 0:10:56.160 --> 0:10:58.600 all the other times. Like I'm literally it is nine 0:10:58.640 --> 0:11:02.160 o'clock right now and I'm recording podcast at night because 0:11:02.240 --> 0:11:04.839 I have literally recorded a podcast earlier today. I was 0:11:04.960 --> 0:11:08.720 editing a video, I was doing some brand stuff and 0:11:10.320 --> 0:11:12.200 taking care of Sonny. And now it's nine o'clock and 0:11:12.240 --> 0:11:14.080 I'm just now having time to get to this, and 0:11:14.160 --> 0:11:16.280 I want to get to this, but it's like you 0:11:16.320 --> 0:11:18.320 just don't have any time. I don't have any extra 0:11:18.400 --> 0:11:20.560 time anymore. And if I do have extra time, I 0:11:20.600 --> 0:11:22.840 just want to spend it with Michael and Sunny. So 0:11:24.200 --> 0:11:26.360 and my relationship with Michael has changed because I mean, 0:11:26.440 --> 0:11:30.760 we're both tired, you know, like it's gotten deeper on it. 0:11:30.760 --> 0:11:33.080 It's everyone always says that, like it gets deeper, and 0:11:33.120 --> 0:11:37.520 it has gotten deeper because we now have something so 0:11:37.600 --> 0:11:41.040 much bigger than I don't know if I'm gonna say 0:11:41.080 --> 0:11:43.079 this right. It's not bigger than our love, like Michael 0:11:43.120 --> 0:11:45.240 and I still love each other so much, but like 0:11:46.040 --> 0:11:50.160 our love made a human and now we are fully 0:11:50.200 --> 0:11:52.800 in charge of this human's life right now. And it's 0:11:52.880 --> 0:11:58.080 like whoa, I think we both just we're just we 0:11:58.120 --> 0:12:00.880 feel driven to work harder in our careers. We feel 0:12:00.960 --> 0:12:06.040 driven to show up for Sunny all the time. Like 0:12:06.600 --> 0:12:12.240 you just you're tired because you're NonStop doing stuff. And 0:12:12.280 --> 0:12:15.680 so it's like before, I mean, Michael and I would work, 0:12:16.240 --> 0:12:18.200 and then we'd have all the rest of the time 0:12:18.240 --> 0:12:21.080 to do whatever we want to want, you know, And 0:12:21.120 --> 0:12:23.559 now it's like we're working and he's on the road 0:12:23.600 --> 0:12:25.760 in a musician. So when he goes on the road, 0:12:26.160 --> 0:12:29.920 he obviously doesn't get to be a sunny which I 0:12:29.960 --> 0:12:32.240 know he misses her, but he can kind of have 0:12:32.360 --> 0:12:36.120 a little um bit of and I guess not I 0:12:36.120 --> 0:12:39.319 wouldn't be it's not a little bit of just having 0:12:39.320 --> 0:12:41.480 that old lifestyle a little bit where you know, you 0:12:41.840 --> 0:12:44.760 can wake up when you want to wake up or 0:12:44.800 --> 0:12:46.320 need to wake up, not when the baby wakes you 0:12:46.400 --> 0:12:48.240 up and all that. But for the most part we 0:12:48.320 --> 0:12:54.480 are twenty pretty much just on an intense sunny schedule, 0:12:54.480 --> 0:12:57.560 and it's great and it's amazing. And I would say 0:12:57.760 --> 0:13:03.600 everything has gotten harder in the sense that like you 0:13:03.800 --> 0:13:07.480 just are going, going, going, NonStop, and every second of 0:13:07.520 --> 0:13:10.640 your day is valuable. Whereas before I had a lot 0:13:10.640 --> 0:13:14.360 of time that I could just leisurely spin places and 0:13:14.640 --> 0:13:17.520 that's why I was super social. Now it's like I 0:13:17.520 --> 0:13:20.600 am not super social, but I'm grateful for the season 0:13:20.600 --> 0:13:23.200 of my life right now because I love it. I 0:13:23.320 --> 0:13:27.079 love that no is my first response to things instead 0:13:27.120 --> 0:13:31.160 of yes, Like I love that I'm being selective and 0:13:31.200 --> 0:13:34.160 my time management has gotten so good. I mean, I 0:13:35.040 --> 0:13:37.200 unfortunately show up late now because getting out of the 0:13:37.200 --> 0:13:38.880 house with a kid, like I feel like I'm like 0:13:38.920 --> 0:13:42.679 twenty minutes late everywhere I go just terrible. But like 0:13:42.720 --> 0:13:44.840 if she's napping and she's not up yet, and there's 0:13:44.840 --> 0:13:49.280 something happening, like a friends get together or somebody's having 0:13:49.320 --> 0:13:52.280 like a birthday party, like I'm gonna let her finish 0:13:52.320 --> 0:13:55.040 her nap because if she didn't finish her nap, she's 0:13:55.080 --> 0:13:57.199 gonna be crying and she's gonna be tired. I mean, 0:13:57.240 --> 0:13:59.760 you know, it's just like your priority has completely changed. 0:14:01.280 --> 0:14:02.720 Or if she wakes up and I got a feed her, 0:14:02.760 --> 0:14:05.319 and like she's not taking her bottle, like I want 0:14:05.320 --> 0:14:06.720 to get the bottle down before we get in the car. 0:14:06.720 --> 0:14:07.840 And then when you get in the car, you gotta 0:14:07.880 --> 0:14:10.000 pack like seventeen thousand things to get out of the house. 0:14:10.360 --> 0:14:13.040 So everything has changed because it's like I said, it's 0:14:13.080 --> 0:14:16.520 like harder to leave, like it's much more of an ordeal. 0:14:17.120 --> 0:14:19.680 You gotta get a babysitter, you gotta pack up basically 0:14:19.720 --> 0:14:22.480 your whole baby nursery. When you leave like all that stuff, 0:14:22.520 --> 0:14:26.720 but it is so fulfilling and it's made me just 0:14:26.840 --> 0:14:30.160 get the laser focused on what matters to me, and 0:14:30.200 --> 0:14:34.160 that for that, I'm grateful because I I definitely know 0:14:34.200 --> 0:14:36.600 what matters to me, Like when something comes up or 0:14:36.640 --> 0:14:40.120 I get an opportunity to do something, I know immediately 0:14:40.160 --> 0:14:43.400 if it's worth going to the trouble to get there 0:14:43.640 --> 0:14:45.720 with Sonny, or or to go into the trouble to 0:14:45.760 --> 0:14:48.200 get a babysitter to go, or if it's just not 0:14:48.560 --> 0:14:50.800 going to happen for me right now. And so it's 0:14:50.800 --> 0:14:56.120 definitely allowed me to filter and prioritize what really matters. 0:14:56.160 --> 0:14:57.680 And at the end of the day, nothing matters more 0:14:57.760 --> 0:15:00.320 than her. It does matter to me to keep my 0:15:01.080 --> 0:15:04.280 self going, to keep my career growing going and growing, 0:15:04.400 --> 0:15:07.000 and to keep my life going and my friendships going on, 0:15:07.080 --> 0:15:08.760 my marriage going like that all matters to me. So 0:15:08.840 --> 0:15:12.640 there is balance. But um, I would say my relationships 0:15:12.640 --> 0:15:15.920 have changed just I just don't have all this time 0:15:15.960 --> 0:15:22.600 to just be anywhere any time doing anything. I'm just 0:15:22.600 --> 0:15:25.120 not on my own schedule anymore. I'm on Sunday schedule, 0:15:25.200 --> 0:15:28.400 and so um it has to be a major hell 0:15:28.520 --> 0:15:32.560 yes for me to leave her, and so that's how 0:15:32.760 --> 0:15:35.560 it's all changed. But as far as like romance and stuff, 0:15:35.600 --> 0:15:38.000 Michael and I still have romance and we still love 0:15:38.040 --> 0:15:42.400 each other. I think when you're young and your twenties 0:15:42.440 --> 0:15:46.520 and you're working and you don't have any other responsibility, 0:15:47.600 --> 0:15:51.200 and it's a lot easier to have romance all the time. 0:15:51.360 --> 0:15:56.240 But we prioritize each other and so you just prioritize 0:15:56.280 --> 0:15:59.400 it and you don't forget that you love each other 0:15:59.440 --> 0:16:02.720 and you know, make time for each other. It's not like, 0:16:04.240 --> 0:16:06.760 you know, you're not like just rolling around the bed 0:16:06.760 --> 0:16:08.440 twenty four hours a day maybe like you did in 0:16:08.480 --> 0:16:10.840 your early twenties or when you first were meeting without kids. 0:16:10.880 --> 0:16:13.760 But it's still there and it's deeper, and I feel 0:16:13.760 --> 0:16:16.760 grateful for it because we're just we have a big focus, 0:16:16.760 --> 0:16:19.800 like we have big goals and we have a family, 0:16:19.880 --> 0:16:22.520 and it's like awesome to be in this family unit 0:16:22.560 --> 0:16:24.960 with someone and to be on somebody's team and we 0:16:25.080 --> 0:16:30.240 both I really have passion and a big purpose together 0:16:30.400 --> 0:16:32.920 and it's awesome. So I would say it's hard, but 0:16:33.120 --> 0:16:36.360 heart isn't bad. Heart is good, Like nothing worth doing 0:16:36.440 --> 0:16:39.680 is easy, and so it's hard, but like it's good hard. 0:16:39.800 --> 0:16:41.800 Everything I'm doing I want to do. And I said 0:16:41.840 --> 0:16:45.640 that to myself the other day. Like, I'm busier than 0:16:45.680 --> 0:16:47.600 I've ever been, and I'm more tired than i've ever 0:16:47.640 --> 0:16:50.080 been in My days are so jam packed, more than 0:16:50.080 --> 0:16:52.640 they've ever been. But everything I'm doing I love to do. 0:16:53.480 --> 0:16:56.840 I love getting to wake up and take care of Sunny. 0:16:57.000 --> 0:16:59.760 I love getting to wake up and do my podcast 0:16:59.800 --> 0:17:02.040 and work on brand deals that I love and like 0:17:02.160 --> 0:17:05.320 partner with different companies that I love, and collaborate with 0:17:05.320 --> 0:17:08.159 people that I love. I love getting to dream with 0:17:08.200 --> 0:17:10.280 Michael and be a part of his career, and I 0:17:10.320 --> 0:17:13.240 love watching him work so hard to cheat his school. 0:17:13.320 --> 0:17:15.600 So I love what we're doing. I love my family. 0:17:15.680 --> 0:17:20.399 I love my friends. I love making time for them. Um, 0:17:20.440 --> 0:17:23.919 I love. I love my life. It's I'm tired more 0:17:23.960 --> 0:17:26.479 than I've ever been, but I love it and everything 0:17:26.480 --> 0:17:28.840 I'm doing has meaning to me, and that feels really, 0:17:28.880 --> 0:17:34.320 really good. What advice would you tell your twenty year 0:17:34.359 --> 0:17:40.960 old self? Be free, live it up, and do exactly 0:17:41.000 --> 0:17:46.400 what you did. Like, I love how my twenty year 0:17:46.440 --> 0:17:50.200 old self did it. I would tell her to drop 0:17:50.240 --> 0:17:53.040 the anxiety, but I would tell myself that now at 0:17:53.040 --> 0:17:58.399 thirty six, like, try not to have anxiety because anxiety 0:17:59.119 --> 0:18:04.719 it doesn't give you anywhere, and worrying is a waste 0:18:04.720 --> 0:18:08.120 of time and what you worry about most likely will 0:18:08.240 --> 0:18:11.640 never happen. And there's so many things that can happen. 0:18:12.240 --> 0:18:16.119 Nobody's exempt from stuff happening. There's so much fear in 0:18:16.160 --> 0:18:18.560 the world, but also there's so much love and joy 0:18:18.720 --> 0:18:21.760 in the world, and so we can't control what's gonna happen. 0:18:22.680 --> 0:18:25.800 Like I and that's what happened to me with Sonny 0:18:25.840 --> 0:18:28.600 in the beginning, her first three months of life, Like 0:18:28.640 --> 0:18:31.239 I was so and I still have anxiety, but I 0:18:31.280 --> 0:18:36.159 was so anxious about everything, so worried about everything that 0:18:36.200 --> 0:18:39.560 could happen to her, like anything that could go wrong. Finally, 0:18:39.560 --> 0:18:43.240 I'm like, I just can't live like that. There's so 0:18:43.280 --> 0:18:46.640 many things that could go right, too, And if something 0:18:46.760 --> 0:18:49.760 is going to happen to any of us, it's going 0:18:49.800 --> 0:18:52.239 to probably happen, whether we're worried about it or not. 0:18:52.440 --> 0:18:57.000 And so why not enjoy the people in your life, 0:18:57.000 --> 0:18:59.159 Like I want to wake up every day and enjoy 0:18:59.240 --> 0:19:01.719 Sonny without a not in my stomach because I'm fearful 0:19:01.760 --> 0:19:03.800 of what can happen in the world. I want to 0:19:03.840 --> 0:19:06.080 wake up every day and have peace in my stomach 0:19:06.119 --> 0:19:08.960 and be like, I'm gonna love the ship out of 0:19:09.000 --> 0:19:11.439 this child today because she is such a blessing to me. 0:19:12.200 --> 0:19:16.639 I love her little smile, her little laugh. I love 0:19:16.720 --> 0:19:18.960 watching her try to do new things, like today she's 0:19:19.080 --> 0:19:22.119 trying to learn how to crawl. I don't want to 0:19:22.119 --> 0:19:23.600 sit around and live with fear. I want to be 0:19:23.680 --> 0:19:30.680 in that moment and whatever comes our way, I will 0:19:30.920 --> 0:19:32.720 lean on God and deal with it then. But I 0:19:32.800 --> 0:19:36.400 am not going to sit around and doomsday myself and 0:19:36.440 --> 0:19:39.120 miss my beautiful blessings in my life that I prayed 0:19:39.680 --> 0:19:42.800 so much for, and then I am so grateful to 0:19:42.840 --> 0:19:47.040 have because I'm sitting around worry about all this awful 0:19:47.320 --> 0:19:49.399 ship circulating in the world. I'm gonna deal with what 0:19:49.440 --> 0:19:50.880 I need to deal with when I need to deal 0:19:50.880 --> 0:19:54.200 with it, and until then, I'm not gonna I'm really 0:19:54.240 --> 0:19:55.960 try hard not to have anxiety. And that's what I 0:19:56.040 --> 0:19:58.080 have told my younger self. I would have said, you're 0:19:58.160 --> 0:20:00.560 doing it you because I went for if. I still 0:20:00.600 --> 0:20:03.240 do like, I'm not scared to jump, I'm not scared 0:20:03.240 --> 0:20:05.159 to take a risk. I'm not scared to go all in. 0:20:05.280 --> 0:20:07.520 I'm not scared to fall flat on my face. I'm 0:20:07.520 --> 0:20:11.440 not scared to pick myself up. I'm always always good 0:20:11.480 --> 0:20:14.360 at following my heart. And when I get those nudges 0:20:14.400 --> 0:20:17.560 and that instinct and those big pushes inside of me 0:20:17.600 --> 0:20:19.560 that I feel like I gotta go somewhere and make 0:20:19.600 --> 0:20:21.240 a move and do it, and like this is the 0:20:21.320 --> 0:20:24.840 right direction. Even if I have no idea what I'm doing, 0:20:25.040 --> 0:20:27.680 I will go for it. I always have, I always will, 0:20:28.560 --> 0:20:31.119 And I did that a lot of my twenties, and 0:20:31.400 --> 0:20:33.440 it was so great to end up doing the amazing race. 0:20:33.440 --> 0:20:34.840 A couple of times. I've been in a couple of 0:20:34.840 --> 0:20:38.320 record deals. I've gotten to travel the world, meet awesome people, 0:20:38.359 --> 0:20:43.960 get amazing experiences, and learn so much, had awesome jobs, 0:20:44.000 --> 0:20:47.800 and I just kind of learn so much and experience 0:20:47.880 --> 0:20:50.000 so much because I was never scared to take a risk. 0:20:50.119 --> 0:20:53.760 But I would say, what would I tell my twenty 0:20:53.800 --> 0:20:57.960 year OLDSLF go for it. When you get opportunities, take them, 0:20:58.240 --> 0:21:02.240 take them now ever, abandoned the responsibilities that you have 0:21:02.359 --> 0:21:05.680 in your life. If you are a young mom, or 0:21:05.720 --> 0:21:08.679 if you are in a relationship, you know, like a 0:21:08.760 --> 0:21:12.600 marriage or something, and if it's not abusive, like, never 0:21:12.640 --> 0:21:18.280 abandon your responsibilities if you have, if you have big responsibilities, 0:21:18.280 --> 0:21:21.320 to take care of those responsibilities. But also when you 0:21:21.359 --> 0:21:24.960 get it an opportunity that works with your responsibilities, take 0:21:25.080 --> 0:21:29.080 those opportunities. And if you don't have any responsibilities, fly 0:21:29.320 --> 0:21:33.400