1 00:00:00,080 --> 00:00:03,400 Speaker 1: The Club is a production of I Heart Radio and 2 00:00:03,520 --> 00:00:09,240 Speaker 1: Double Elvis. Amy Winehouse died at the age of and 3 00:00:09,360 --> 00:00:12,400 Speaker 1: she lived a life that gravitated towards trouble like a 4 00:00:12,440 --> 00:00:15,800 Speaker 1: moth to a flame. I can give you twenty seven 5 00:00:15,840 --> 00:00:19,919 Speaker 1: reasons why that statement is true. Fourteen would be the 6 00:00:20,000 --> 00:00:23,120 Speaker 1: number of months Pete Doherty and the Libertine spent behind 7 00:00:23,239 --> 00:00:27,080 Speaker 1: bars before linking up with Amy to make some disturbing 8 00:00:27,200 --> 00:00:31,560 Speaker 1: videos featuring baby mice. Three more would be the number 9 00:00:31,600 --> 00:00:33,839 Speaker 1: of days she went on a binge of class A 10 00:00:34,120 --> 00:00:38,360 Speaker 1: drugs shortly after being introduced to them by her then husband. 11 00:00:39,200 --> 00:00:42,400 Speaker 1: Another six would be the number of substances coursing through 12 00:00:42,400 --> 00:00:45,640 Speaker 1: her body when she overdosed and nearly died at the 13 00:00:45,760 --> 00:00:49,040 Speaker 1: end of that binge. Two more would be the number 14 00:00:49,040 --> 00:00:51,440 Speaker 1: of years that her marriage would last before she was 15 00:00:51,520 --> 00:00:55,560 Speaker 1: served divorce papers from behind prison bars, sending her into 16 00:00:55,600 --> 00:00:59,840 Speaker 1: a post rehab downward spiral. Another one for the number 17 00:00:59,840 --> 00:01:03,200 Speaker 1: of theater managers she violently assaulted while attending a live 18 00:01:03,240 --> 00:01:07,720 Speaker 1: holiday performance of Cinderella. In a final one will be 19 00:01:07,760 --> 00:01:10,119 Speaker 1: the number of years she'd have left to live after 20 00:01:10,240 --> 00:01:14,440 Speaker 1: making a surprise performance with Mark Ronson and giving everyone 21 00:01:14,520 --> 00:01:21,000 Speaker 1: hope that things were finally turning around all totally. On 22 00:01:21,160 --> 00:01:26,960 Speaker 1: this episode disturbing videos Class A, drugs, downward spirals in 23 00:01:27,160 --> 00:01:32,880 Speaker 1: Amy Winehouse Um Jake Brennan in This Is the Seven 24 00:01:32,959 --> 00:02:15,160 Speaker 1: Club m M. The low quality camera was fixed on Amy. 25 00:02:15,919 --> 00:02:19,679 Speaker 1: She stood half naked in a dingy room, her fingernails 26 00:02:19,720 --> 00:02:23,840 Speaker 1: full of dirt and ash. Clothes hung from her thin frame. 27 00:02:24,639 --> 00:02:28,200 Speaker 1: Her eyes were sunken and dark. The room was filled 28 00:02:28,240 --> 00:02:32,240 Speaker 1: with an oppressive blue light. It's glow reflected off Amy's pale, 29 00:02:32,320 --> 00:02:36,880 Speaker 1: sickly skin, a sharp contrast with the black beehive atop 30 00:02:36,960 --> 00:02:40,840 Speaker 1: her head. She wasn't the only one in the room. 31 00:02:40,880 --> 00:02:44,560 Speaker 1: Another lanky, gunt figure stalked in the shadows behind her, 32 00:02:45,280 --> 00:02:49,320 Speaker 1: a figure who, like Amy's husband, Blake Fielder, Civil, was 33 00:02:49,400 --> 00:02:53,079 Speaker 1: no stranger to the inside of a jail cell, a 34 00:02:53,200 --> 00:02:56,440 Speaker 1: walking train wreck who also happened to be in indie 35 00:02:56,520 --> 00:03:00,480 Speaker 1: rock icon the king ship of London's two only first 36 00:03:00,480 --> 00:03:04,920 Speaker 1: century guitar rock Renaissance, Pete Daugherty of the Libertines and 37 00:03:05,080 --> 00:03:08,519 Speaker 1: Baby Shamble's Fame, the one and the same who hadn't 38 00:03:08,520 --> 00:03:11,360 Speaker 1: met a bottle model or snortable substance he didn't like 39 00:03:11,520 --> 00:03:14,720 Speaker 1: in all of England. He had the look of a 40 00:03:14,760 --> 00:03:17,480 Speaker 1: man on a perpetual bender, like he was due to 41 00:03:17,520 --> 00:03:20,000 Speaker 1: stumble out of his own body at any time. An 42 00:03:20,040 --> 00:03:23,600 Speaker 1: atomic bomb of debauchery dropped Drank and Demons, and he 43 00:03:23,639 --> 00:03:28,919 Speaker 1: had just entered Amy's orbit. Amy held up a small 44 00:03:28,960 --> 00:03:32,760 Speaker 1: plastic container. It was full of two dozen day old mice. 45 00:03:33,440 --> 00:03:36,880 Speaker 1: Amy and Pete had been nursing them. The newborn rodents 46 00:03:36,920 --> 00:03:39,800 Speaker 1: couldn't even hold their heads up. Their skin was still 47 00:03:39,840 --> 00:03:43,440 Speaker 1: pink translucent. They were blissfully unaware that one of the 48 00:03:43,480 --> 00:03:48,000 Speaker 1: two junkies providing their care had recently was alleged forced 49 00:03:48,040 --> 00:03:51,720 Speaker 1: his own cat to smoke crack with him. Amy's hand 50 00:03:51,800 --> 00:03:55,000 Speaker 1: trembled as she reached into the container and held up 51 00:03:55,040 --> 00:03:57,920 Speaker 1: one of the mice. She handed it to Pete. She 52 00:03:58,000 --> 00:04:00,760 Speaker 1: picked up another, sat it on her law bony finger 53 00:04:00,880 --> 00:04:03,760 Speaker 1: and held it to the camera. This one's got a 54 00:04:03,800 --> 00:04:08,520 Speaker 1: message for Blake. Blake, please don't divorce mummy. She loves you. 55 00:04:08,600 --> 00:04:12,440 Speaker 1: Ever so, Pete turned his mouse to the camera. If 56 00:04:12,440 --> 00:04:15,880 Speaker 1: you divorce her, you'll have to deal with me. The 57 00:04:16,000 --> 00:04:19,440 Speaker 1: video was a tough watch, and so naturally it was 58 00:04:19,480 --> 00:04:24,320 Speaker 1: posted to YouTube, and it was titled Wine Mouse to 59 00:04:25,160 --> 00:04:28,600 Speaker 1: Century musical icons out of their minds on another fucking planet, 60 00:04:28,880 --> 00:04:33,359 Speaker 1: handling rodents in some nondescript London flat to musical icons 61 00:04:33,360 --> 00:04:37,120 Speaker 1: who had respectively been released from police custody and from prison, 62 00:04:37,400 --> 00:04:40,880 Speaker 1: both on drug related charges just days before the video's release. 63 00:04:41,960 --> 00:04:44,640 Speaker 1: Two musical icons who wouldn't know a brake pedal if 64 00:04:44,680 --> 00:04:47,400 Speaker 1: it hit them in their numbed faces, both on a 65 00:04:47,440 --> 00:04:51,839 Speaker 1: collision course, with the abyss willingly sarching towards it hand 66 00:04:51,880 --> 00:04:56,360 Speaker 1: in hand. The video was shocking, but really not surprising. 67 00:04:57,080 --> 00:05:00,479 Speaker 1: It seemingly proved that everything that tabloids wrote about Amy 68 00:05:00,480 --> 00:05:03,680 Speaker 1: Winehouse had been accurate. Amy Winehouse and Pete already had 69 00:05:03,680 --> 00:05:08,000 Speaker 1: already been photographed popping around town. The paparazzi were onto them, 70 00:05:08,160 --> 00:05:11,920 Speaker 1: and the tabloids already decided what was happening. While Blake 71 00:05:12,000 --> 00:05:14,560 Speaker 1: Fielder civil was sitting in a jail cell for his 72 00:05:14,600 --> 00:05:17,680 Speaker 1: assault on James King at the Macbeth Pub and the 73 00:05:17,720 --> 00:05:21,520 Speaker 1: subsequent attempt to extort that victim, Amy was shacking up 74 00:05:21,560 --> 00:05:24,760 Speaker 1: with the biggest druggie in the country, getting her rocks 75 00:05:24,800 --> 00:05:28,200 Speaker 1: off in more ways than one. And then, to back 76 00:05:28,320 --> 00:05:33,359 Speaker 1: up that tabloid thesis remarkably, a second video surfaced. The 77 00:05:33,480 --> 00:05:38,440 Speaker 1: camera was shaky, the quality again. Poor Amy sat over 78 00:05:38,480 --> 00:05:41,839 Speaker 1: a small cage, holding one of the newborn mice in 79 00:05:41,920 --> 00:05:44,960 Speaker 1: one hand and a bottle in the other. She slurred 80 00:05:44,960 --> 00:05:48,000 Speaker 1: her words as she bottle fed the mouse. Her mood 81 00:05:48,200 --> 00:05:51,279 Speaker 1: was far more subdued, as if she was smack in 82 00:05:51,279 --> 00:05:54,680 Speaker 1: the middle of a harsh come down. This one, this 83 00:05:54,839 --> 00:05:58,560 Speaker 1: is baby blue. Amy nurse the day's old road and 84 00:05:58,720 --> 00:06:03,719 Speaker 1: gently move slowly and deliberately in an almost trance like state. 85 00:06:04,400 --> 00:06:06,920 Speaker 1: I'm going to keep a special eye on this one. 86 00:06:07,520 --> 00:06:14,760 Speaker 1: He feels very neglected. Amy could relate. Blake was incarcerated, 87 00:06:15,200 --> 00:06:18,599 Speaker 1: and she was feeling a little neglected herself. Had already 88 00:06:18,600 --> 00:06:21,640 Speaker 1: felt like Blake had been gone for an eternity, but 89 00:06:21,760 --> 00:06:24,160 Speaker 1: they still had a long way to go before they 90 00:06:24,160 --> 00:06:27,919 Speaker 1: would be together again. And that's when Pete already stepped 91 00:06:27,920 --> 00:06:32,240 Speaker 1: in hell. He even looked a little like Blake. Amy 92 00:06:32,320 --> 00:06:35,680 Speaker 1: claimed that she and Pete were nothing more than platonic friends, 93 00:06:35,720 --> 00:06:38,760 Speaker 1: but to the public's prying eyes, she had a thing 94 00:06:38,880 --> 00:06:43,600 Speaker 1: for jailbirds. Pete had just been released from Wormwood Scrubs, 95 00:06:43,640 --> 00:06:46,600 Speaker 1: a dirty old relic of a prison. The place was 96 00:06:46,640 --> 00:06:49,880 Speaker 1: so dicey and dangerous that an officer once said, if 97 00:06:49,880 --> 00:06:52,320 Speaker 1: a prisoner wanted to take a hostage, you would be 98 00:06:52,360 --> 00:06:55,960 Speaker 1: at their mercy. Pete had been jailed fourteen weeks for 99 00:06:56,080 --> 00:06:59,040 Speaker 1: missing a meeting with his probation officer after a very 100 00:06:59,160 --> 00:07:03,400 Speaker 1: public Hero and bust give him Pezz rap sheet. The 101 00:07:03,480 --> 00:07:06,039 Speaker 1: fact that fourteen weeks was as long as stint in 102 00:07:06,120 --> 00:07:09,840 Speaker 1: prison with something of a miracle. His backlog of brush 103 00:07:09,960 --> 00:07:13,960 Speaker 1: ups the law made Amy look bush leak. Two thousand 104 00:07:14,080 --> 00:07:17,960 Speaker 1: three robbery. Pete broke into his own bandmate's apartment and 105 00:07:18,000 --> 00:07:21,160 Speaker 1: get away with instruments and recording equipment to sell so 106 00:07:21,200 --> 00:07:25,600 Speaker 1: he could buy more dope. Two thousand five Robbery and blackmail. 107 00:07:26,040 --> 00:07:28,960 Speaker 1: He and a friend attacked a documentary filmmaker who sold 108 00:07:29,000 --> 00:07:32,960 Speaker 1: photos of Pete smoking hero into several tabloids. Pete broke 109 00:07:33,040 --> 00:07:36,800 Speaker 1: the Guys Knows two thousand five. Possession of Class A 110 00:07:36,960 --> 00:07:41,360 Speaker 1: drugs twice, driving under the influence twice within ten days 111 00:07:41,520 --> 00:07:45,920 Speaker 1: order to enter a rehabilitation center didn't stick. Two thousand six, 112 00:07:46,240 --> 00:07:48,920 Speaker 1: driving under the influence suspected to have been high on 113 00:07:49,000 --> 00:07:52,720 Speaker 1: Class A drugs, required to attend eighteen months in rehabilitation. 114 00:07:53,120 --> 00:07:58,080 Speaker 1: Fat fucking chance. Drug possession five more times, casual car 115 00:07:58,200 --> 00:08:02,040 Speaker 1: theft under the influence of drugs Assault that BBC radio 116 00:08:02,120 --> 00:08:05,120 Speaker 1: reporter would think twice before approaching him again. Two thousand 117 00:08:05,200 --> 00:08:09,120 Speaker 1: seven driving without insurance, probably high possession of crack, heroin, 118 00:08:09,240 --> 00:08:13,120 Speaker 1: cannabis and kennemy possession while at London's v Festival. Assault 119 00:08:13,280 --> 00:08:15,280 Speaker 1: the photographer was trying to take pictures of him and 120 00:08:15,320 --> 00:08:22,320 Speaker 1: his girlfriend. Thirteen arrests in four years. The British tabloids 121 00:08:22,400 --> 00:08:25,160 Speaker 1: dragged Pete through the mud every chance they got, and 122 00:08:25,200 --> 00:08:29,640 Speaker 1: he gave them no shortage of chances. Rehab. Yes, actually 123 00:08:29,680 --> 00:08:31,520 Speaker 1: he'd been there, but he could never find a way 124 00:08:31,560 --> 00:08:34,959 Speaker 1: to kick the habit, not completely. He was addicted not 125 00:08:35,040 --> 00:08:38,160 Speaker 1: just to elicit substances. He was addicted to the life 126 00:08:38,200 --> 00:08:42,440 Speaker 1: of a zero fox. Given Lawbreaker, his atomic glow shone 127 00:08:42,480 --> 00:08:46,839 Speaker 1: brightly on Amy Winos. He detonated on impact. Amy was 128 00:08:46,920 --> 00:08:50,600 Speaker 1: scorched earth ground zero. She had pushed her addictions to 129 00:08:50,640 --> 00:08:55,040 Speaker 1: the absolute limit. Years later, in an interview with The 130 00:08:55,120 --> 00:08:58,440 Speaker 1: Daily Mail, Pete Doherty would confess that his relationship with 131 00:08:58,480 --> 00:09:02,520 Speaker 1: Amy did cross over and friends to lovers, albeit briefly. 132 00:09:03,160 --> 00:09:06,600 Speaker 1: Towards the end, he said, as only lovers can, she 133 00:09:06,720 --> 00:09:10,200 Speaker 1: became quite mean and cruel to me, And when words 134 00:09:10,240 --> 00:09:14,200 Speaker 1: weren't enough to communicate exactly how she felt, Pete claimed 135 00:09:14,240 --> 00:09:17,720 Speaker 1: her mean right hook did the talking for her. Amy 136 00:09:17,800 --> 00:09:21,400 Speaker 1: saved her tenderness, for the mice and for Blake, whom 137 00:09:21,440 --> 00:09:24,720 Speaker 1: she continued to love against the odds, even when the 138 00:09:24,760 --> 00:09:27,840 Speaker 1: odds were not just sad, they were stacked against her, 139 00:09:28,440 --> 00:09:32,040 Speaker 1: even as things were about to go from sad to worse. 140 00:09:59,280 --> 00:10:03,240 Speaker 1: First her eyes went out, then her body followed, gravity 141 00:10:03,280 --> 00:10:06,520 Speaker 1: claimed her. She dropped straight down, hit the bed full 142 00:10:06,559 --> 00:10:10,440 Speaker 1: body convulsions. The partygoers clammed up, and no one said 143 00:10:10,440 --> 00:10:13,480 Speaker 1: a goddamn thing. She made noises and slid off of 144 00:10:13,480 --> 00:10:16,240 Speaker 1: the bed and hit the floor, collapsed like a dying star. 145 00:10:16,400 --> 00:10:22,160 Speaker 1: Was nothing but a dull thud. August two thousand seven. 146 00:10:22,840 --> 00:10:26,760 Speaker 1: At this point, Blake Fielder Civil had zero experience dealing 147 00:10:26,840 --> 00:10:30,160 Speaker 1: with seizures. He was high as ship, and now he 148 00:10:30,200 --> 00:10:33,680 Speaker 1: was panicking. On top of being high, his heart bounded, 149 00:10:33,960 --> 00:10:37,320 Speaker 1: his head felt like a squall at sea. In his head, 150 00:10:37,360 --> 00:10:40,200 Speaker 1: he thought to himself, somebody do something, someone to save 151 00:10:40,280 --> 00:10:43,040 Speaker 1: my wife's life. But the only word that kept coming 152 00:10:43,040 --> 00:10:46,679 Speaker 1: out of his mouth was Amy, each time louder and 153 00:10:46,720 --> 00:10:49,439 Speaker 1: more helpless than before, Like if he said her name 154 00:10:49,480 --> 00:10:51,560 Speaker 1: loud enough, it would reach her and she would snap 155 00:10:51,559 --> 00:10:54,280 Speaker 1: out of it. But saying Amy's name over and over 156 00:10:54,320 --> 00:10:57,040 Speaker 1: again wasn't going to do anything, and neither was anyone 157 00:10:57,080 --> 00:10:59,320 Speaker 1: else fright out of their minds at this house party. 158 00:11:00,000 --> 00:11:03,240 Speaker 1: Blake was going out to come to Amy's rescue, so 159 00:11:03,280 --> 00:11:05,880 Speaker 1: he quickly dropped to the floor and picked up Amy's head. 160 00:11:06,200 --> 00:11:08,000 Speaker 1: He pulled her tongue out of her mouth to make 161 00:11:08,040 --> 00:11:11,400 Speaker 1: sure she didn't swallow it or bite it off. Suddenly, 162 00:11:11,720 --> 00:11:16,760 Speaker 1: Amy stopped breathing. No, no, she couldn't die, not here, 163 00:11:16,760 --> 00:11:18,520 Speaker 1: not now. She had so much left to do. She 164 00:11:18,600 --> 00:11:21,319 Speaker 1: was just getting started, and they had just been partying 165 00:11:21,320 --> 00:11:24,600 Speaker 1: with some friends. Nothing out of the ordinary. Sure, they 166 00:11:24,600 --> 00:11:26,880 Speaker 1: were on a three day drug bench, but it wasn't 167 00:11:26,880 --> 00:11:28,720 Speaker 1: even like she had done that much at one time. 168 00:11:29,200 --> 00:11:32,600 Speaker 1: They had paced themselves in this moment. It wasn't even 169 00:11:32,640 --> 00:11:35,440 Speaker 1: sure if he could remember exactly what she had recently taken, 170 00:11:35,679 --> 00:11:38,960 Speaker 1: or in what order mouth to mouth he had seen 171 00:11:38,960 --> 00:11:42,480 Speaker 1: that done before. It seemed easy. No, Sweat just used 172 00:11:42,520 --> 00:11:46,080 Speaker 1: his mouth to breathe inside her mouth. Blake pried open 173 00:11:46,120 --> 00:11:49,440 Speaker 1: Amy's jaw and pushed air into her lungs. Felt for 174 00:11:49,480 --> 00:11:54,880 Speaker 1: a pulse nothing fuck had her heart completely stopped. All 175 00:11:54,920 --> 00:11:57,400 Speaker 1: he could hear was his own heart practically bursting from 176 00:11:57,440 --> 00:12:00,360 Speaker 1: his own body. He tried mouth to mouth again, and 177 00:12:00,400 --> 00:12:03,559 Speaker 1: more forcefully this time, hopefully this would do the trick 178 00:12:03,840 --> 00:12:06,960 Speaker 1: in her chest would finally rise, blowing more air into 179 00:12:06,960 --> 00:12:10,520 Speaker 1: her mouth, hoping for some sign of life, anything at all. Amy, 180 00:12:10,559 --> 00:12:12,760 Speaker 1: come on, love, wake up, wake up, Please wake up. 181 00:12:13,559 --> 00:12:16,160 Speaker 1: And once more he attempted to blow air into her lungs. 182 00:12:17,240 --> 00:12:21,000 Speaker 1: Third time was the charm. Amy coughed and took a 183 00:12:21,040 --> 00:12:24,640 Speaker 1: massive in him. Returning back from the other side, back 184 00:12:24,679 --> 00:12:29,040 Speaker 1: to the land of the living, she looked around the room, startled. 185 00:12:29,600 --> 00:12:31,440 Speaker 1: She didn't know who the hell the man sitting over 186 00:12:31,480 --> 00:12:33,600 Speaker 1: her was, and she sure as didn't know where she 187 00:12:33,800 --> 00:12:36,800 Speaker 1: was or what she was doing on the floor. All 188 00:12:36,880 --> 00:12:40,320 Speaker 1: she knew was that she needed another hit. Someone bring 189 00:12:40,320 --> 00:12:44,760 Speaker 1: her another hit. Immediately, her eyes closed again, and then 190 00:12:44,840 --> 00:12:48,200 Speaker 1: they opened and then closed. She began slipping in and 191 00:12:48,200 --> 00:12:51,800 Speaker 1: out of consciousness every few seconds. A friend rang a 192 00:12:51,840 --> 00:12:54,680 Speaker 1: taxi service and had her taken directly to the hospital 193 00:12:54,720 --> 00:12:58,720 Speaker 1: to recover. She knew the questions from the press would 194 00:12:58,720 --> 00:13:01,600 Speaker 1: come fast and furious us, and they probably already got 195 00:13:01,640 --> 00:13:04,199 Speaker 1: wind of this already smelled the blood of the wounded 196 00:13:04,200 --> 00:13:07,040 Speaker 1: animal and were ready to pounce, so she got out 197 00:13:07,080 --> 00:13:09,920 Speaker 1: ahead of it. Once she recovered, she told the press 198 00:13:10,000 --> 00:13:14,240 Speaker 1: to stop speculating, stop spreading rumors. It was exhaustion, plain 199 00:13:14,320 --> 00:13:17,160 Speaker 1: and simple. That's all. She checked into the hospital because 200 00:13:17,160 --> 00:13:21,320 Speaker 1: she was exhausted. The press had their field day, as 201 00:13:21,360 --> 00:13:24,560 Speaker 1: they always did, and it was later revealed and reported that, 202 00:13:24,640 --> 00:13:27,880 Speaker 1: of course it wasn't exhaustion at all. Amy Caesar was 203 00:13:27,920 --> 00:13:31,240 Speaker 1: doing in an overdose of a mixture of heroin, cocaine, ecstasy, 204 00:13:31,240 --> 00:13:34,679 Speaker 1: academy whiskey, and vodka. She shouldn't have survived. She was 205 00:13:34,720 --> 00:13:38,199 Speaker 1: so tiny and her intake was so large. Doctors warned 206 00:13:38,200 --> 00:13:40,960 Speaker 1: her that the next time she may not be so lucky. 207 00:13:42,640 --> 00:13:46,400 Speaker 1: I'm lucky for Blake Fielder, Civil bad memories, Linger and 208 00:13:46,440 --> 00:13:49,440 Speaker 1: so Amy's two thousand seven overdose was the kind of 209 00:13:49,480 --> 00:13:52,200 Speaker 1: memory running through his mind as he sat in a 210 00:13:52,280 --> 00:13:56,000 Speaker 1: prison cell in January of two thousand nine, on account 211 00:13:56,000 --> 00:14:00,040 Speaker 1: of the whole Macbeth pub dustop, he lurged over a 212 00:14:00,040 --> 00:14:03,000 Speaker 1: some copy of the tabloid News of the World. He'd 213 00:14:03,040 --> 00:14:05,240 Speaker 1: heard about the article on the inside, but needed to 214 00:14:05,280 --> 00:14:08,800 Speaker 1: see it with his own eyes. Inside he found a 215 00:14:08,840 --> 00:14:12,800 Speaker 1: photo of his wife, the Beehive Diva. But in this photo, 216 00:14:13,160 --> 00:14:16,200 Speaker 1: she no longer had that beehive. Her clothes looked like 217 00:14:16,240 --> 00:14:19,000 Speaker 1: they actually fit her. She no longer had the skeletal 218 00:14:19,040 --> 00:14:21,520 Speaker 1: figure that she had been parading around Camden Town just 219 00:14:21,680 --> 00:14:25,440 Speaker 1: months before. She was clean. Jamie told the news of 220 00:14:25,440 --> 00:14:28,000 Speaker 1: the world that she had escaped the so called hell 221 00:14:28,080 --> 00:14:32,000 Speaker 1: of her marriage, traded the stuffy rehabilitation clinics of London 222 00:14:32,040 --> 00:14:34,920 Speaker 1: for the sun soaked beaches of St. Lucia, and she 223 00:14:35,160 --> 00:14:39,320 Speaker 1: a married woman, even at herself a new man. Blake 224 00:14:39,360 --> 00:14:43,600 Speaker 1: read the article imprickled. This wasn't mice man Pete Dharty, 225 00:14:43,840 --> 00:14:46,840 Speaker 1: Jimmy wasn't in a drug induced haste. She was clear 226 00:14:46,840 --> 00:14:49,240 Speaker 1: headed and making a clear headed decision to move on 227 00:14:49,320 --> 00:14:53,000 Speaker 1: with her life. Blake's eyes pulled out quotes. I'll be 228 00:14:53,120 --> 00:14:55,640 Speaker 1: with Blake when I get back. Our whole marriage was 229 00:14:55,720 --> 00:14:58,840 Speaker 1: based on doing drugs for the time being. I've forgotten 230 00:14:58,840 --> 00:15:04,200 Speaker 1: I'm even married, forgotten they were even married. Ouch. It 231 00:15:04,360 --> 00:15:07,400 Speaker 1: was tabloid junk, sure, but it was tabloid junk created 232 00:15:07,400 --> 00:15:10,640 Speaker 1: out of direct quotes from Amy's mouth. So maybe she 233 00:15:10,840 --> 00:15:13,920 Speaker 1: was better off without him. Maybe he was a bad influence. 234 00:15:14,000 --> 00:15:16,440 Speaker 1: He was mad enough to admit that. It's not like 235 00:15:16,480 --> 00:15:18,560 Speaker 1: she was on the straight and narrow by any means 236 00:15:18,600 --> 00:15:21,000 Speaker 1: before they met, But he had introduced her to the 237 00:15:21,040 --> 00:15:25,400 Speaker 1: hard stuff, to kenemie, to ecstasy, to smack. That's said. 238 00:15:25,560 --> 00:15:29,000 Speaker 1: Here he was stuck behind concrete and bars, and there 239 00:15:29,080 --> 00:15:33,040 Speaker 1: she was, his wife, parading around in public with another man. 240 00:15:34,200 --> 00:15:38,680 Speaker 1: Blake contacted his attorney from behind bars, started the divorce process, 241 00:15:39,160 --> 00:15:41,440 Speaker 1: cited adultery. He wasn't gonna be made to look like 242 00:15:41,480 --> 00:15:44,040 Speaker 1: a fool in front of the entire planet, the Sun, 243 00:15:44,160 --> 00:15:46,880 Speaker 1: the Guardian, the Daily Mail, news of the fucking world. 244 00:15:47,160 --> 00:15:49,880 Speaker 1: They had all picked the relationship apart for years, like 245 00:15:49,960 --> 00:15:52,760 Speaker 1: the cynical, desperate vultures they were, and now they'd be 246 00:15:52,800 --> 00:15:56,640 Speaker 1: responsible for putting the final nail in the coffin. When 247 00:15:56,640 --> 00:16:02,200 Speaker 1: divorce papers reached Amy, she was frankly shocked, and then 248 00:16:02,520 --> 00:16:05,160 Speaker 1: she was livid. Blake had done the same thing to 249 00:16:05,240 --> 00:16:08,440 Speaker 1: her before he went to prison, shagging her German supermodel, 250 00:16:08,560 --> 00:16:12,360 Speaker 1: something widely reported in the tabloids. This after a he 251 00:16:12,360 --> 00:16:15,280 Speaker 1: had stood by his side, held a public visual form 252 00:16:15,320 --> 00:16:19,240 Speaker 1: for months, called out his name during performances, changed lyrics 253 00:16:19,240 --> 00:16:22,120 Speaker 1: to her songs to make them more obviously about him. 254 00:16:22,320 --> 00:16:24,880 Speaker 1: She just had to give it time. He would come around. 255 00:16:25,240 --> 00:16:29,240 Speaker 1: He had to. Amy told the son that she still 256 00:16:29,320 --> 00:16:31,960 Speaker 1: loved Blake and that she wouldn't let him divorce her, 257 00:16:32,280 --> 00:16:35,120 Speaker 1: that her behavior in St. Lucia was just her having 258 00:16:35,160 --> 00:16:39,000 Speaker 1: a good time. With each tabloid article, in each interview, 259 00:16:39,200 --> 00:16:42,480 Speaker 1: it became clearer that this wouldn't blow over. Now that 260 00:16:42,520 --> 00:16:45,640 Speaker 1: there was a very real chance of Blake leaving, Amy 261 00:16:45,800 --> 00:16:50,440 Speaker 1: was freaking the funk out. She unraveled, and shortly after 262 00:16:50,480 --> 00:16:53,880 Speaker 1: the St. Lucia Jazz Festival debacle, the press once again 263 00:16:53,960 --> 00:16:56,640 Speaker 1: went on the hunt, and there were reports that Amy 264 00:16:56,640 --> 00:16:59,480 Speaker 1: had been banned from St. Lucia bars and hotels, that 265 00:16:59,600 --> 00:17:02,000 Speaker 1: she had had stayed her welcome, that she had become 266 00:17:02,040 --> 00:17:06,080 Speaker 1: what the locals deemed a nuisance when she's drunk. A 267 00:17:06,200 --> 00:17:08,760 Speaker 1: month later, Amy was on her way back to England 268 00:17:08,800 --> 00:17:10,800 Speaker 1: to attend a court date for her assault on a 269 00:17:10,840 --> 00:17:13,800 Speaker 1: burlesque dancer at the Prince's Trust Charity ball back in 270 00:17:13,840 --> 00:17:16,800 Speaker 1: two thousand and eight. When she stepped off the plane, 271 00:17:17,119 --> 00:17:20,240 Speaker 1: she burst into tears. It had been eight long months 272 00:17:20,280 --> 00:17:23,280 Speaker 1: since she'd been home. She declined to speak to the 273 00:17:23,320 --> 00:17:27,200 Speaker 1: media and though she appeared healthy, the press knew things 274 00:17:27,200 --> 00:17:31,359 Speaker 1: weren't as rosy as they seemed. In fact, if experience 275 00:17:31,400 --> 00:17:34,399 Speaker 1: with Amy Winehouse taught them anything, it was that you 276 00:17:34,400 --> 00:17:36,920 Speaker 1: didn't have to go too far below the beautiful surface 277 00:17:36,960 --> 00:17:45,119 Speaker 1: to discover an ugly truth. We'll be right back after 278 00:17:45,200 --> 00:17:56,439 Speaker 1: this word. We were December two nine, Buckinghamshire, England. Amy 279 00:17:56,480 --> 00:17:59,560 Speaker 1: Winehouse was already a few vodkas SODA's deep as she 280 00:17:59,600 --> 00:18:03,680 Speaker 1: stood backstage at the Milton Keynes Theater. She watched his 281 00:18:03,800 --> 00:18:06,439 Speaker 1: actors and crew members milled around and prepared to do 282 00:18:06,520 --> 00:18:10,000 Speaker 1: something magical. Play make believe in a quote unquote all 283 00:18:10,080 --> 00:18:16,440 Speaker 1: star production of Cinderella. Translation it started octogenarian Mickey Rooney. Reality, 284 00:18:16,440 --> 00:18:18,720 Speaker 1: it was a bunch of washed out blisters performing a 285 00:18:18,840 --> 00:18:22,399 Speaker 1: children's fairy tale. Amy knew it would be a bust. 286 00:18:22,760 --> 00:18:27,520 Speaker 1: Fairy tales were bullshit. There weren't any happy endings in reality. 287 00:18:27,840 --> 00:18:31,240 Speaker 1: Amy was invited to the event by her friend Anthony Kavanaugh, 288 00:18:31,520 --> 00:18:34,480 Speaker 1: a blonde haired pop star turned reality star who was 289 00:18:34,520 --> 00:18:38,119 Speaker 1: a last minute replacement for Prince Charming. At least he 290 00:18:38,160 --> 00:18:41,400 Speaker 1: had the look. Anthony was busy and Amy was bored, 291 00:18:41,480 --> 00:18:45,200 Speaker 1: buzzing and funk her wrist was bleeding again. She'd accidentally 292 00:18:45,240 --> 00:18:47,560 Speaker 1: cut it earlier in the night before the event, and 293 00:18:47,600 --> 00:18:51,240 Speaker 1: now the wound had reopened, and thea Turner, the television 294 00:18:51,240 --> 00:18:55,720 Speaker 1: presenter turned fairy godmother, excitedly approached Amy. She treated Amy 295 00:18:55,800 --> 00:18:59,200 Speaker 1: like she was some novelty, patronizing her, grabbing her hand 296 00:18:59,240 --> 00:19:03,800 Speaker 1: and shaking it vigorously, smiling wide, fake ass TV personality, 297 00:19:04,240 --> 00:19:07,760 Speaker 1: and Amy gave it right back. Oh, I love you, Antea. 298 00:19:08,560 --> 00:19:11,080 Speaker 1: Amy pulled her in close, wiping her bloodied hand on 299 00:19:11,160 --> 00:19:15,119 Speaker 1: the side of Anthea's dress. Hilarious, fuck your fairy tale. 300 00:19:15,960 --> 00:19:19,320 Speaker 1: Anthony looked at her costume with dismay. She scurried off 301 00:19:19,359 --> 00:19:22,080 Speaker 1: towards wardrobe and away from the malevolent force that was 302 00:19:22,119 --> 00:19:27,200 Speaker 1: Amy Winehouse. Amy freshened up her glass. No one should 303 00:19:27,200 --> 00:19:29,360 Speaker 1: be expected to make it through this show without vodka. 304 00:19:31,240 --> 00:19:34,240 Speaker 1: Amy knocked back glass number five and sauntered over to 305 00:19:34,280 --> 00:19:37,080 Speaker 1: her seat at the front of the stage. The curtain 306 00:19:37,080 --> 00:19:40,080 Speaker 1: went up, and she began to heckle the actors, at 307 00:19:40,119 --> 00:19:43,639 Speaker 1: one point calling the evil stepsisters bitches audibly enough for 308 00:19:43,680 --> 00:19:47,920 Speaker 1: the entire general admissionary at to hear. Staff informed the manager, 309 00:19:48,040 --> 00:19:50,520 Speaker 1: who was now paying special attention to the patron with 310 00:19:50,560 --> 00:19:54,160 Speaker 1: the beehive. One character on stage began to sneak up 311 00:19:54,200 --> 00:19:58,960 Speaker 1: on another. Amy couldn't resist. He's fucking behind you. Shishes 312 00:19:59,000 --> 00:20:02,600 Speaker 1: and looks of severe irritation from the audience members surrounded her. 313 00:20:03,640 --> 00:20:07,199 Speaker 1: Oh boo, fucking who? What were they complaining about? She 314 00:20:07,280 --> 00:20:10,480 Speaker 1: was making the show at least palatable. Someone needed to 315 00:20:10,480 --> 00:20:13,320 Speaker 1: provide a little entertainment, because it's sure as hell wasn't 316 00:20:13,320 --> 00:20:17,159 Speaker 1: coming from the knobs on stage. When Kavanaugh appeared for 317 00:20:17,200 --> 00:20:21,119 Speaker 1: his next scene as Prince Charming, Amy couldn't resist. She 318 00:20:21,200 --> 00:20:25,840 Speaker 1: unleashed her masterpiece of the evening, Fox Cinder's Prince Charming 319 00:20:26,119 --> 00:20:31,280 Speaker 1: Marry Me. A nearby child burst into tears. That didn't 320 00:20:31,800 --> 00:20:35,320 Speaker 1: The theater manager had let the slash celebrity slide long enough. 321 00:20:35,840 --> 00:20:39,080 Speaker 1: He shuffled towards Amy's seat with a pair of security guards. 322 00:20:39,440 --> 00:20:41,960 Speaker 1: Could they perhaps move him his winehouse to a private 323 00:20:42,040 --> 00:20:46,320 Speaker 1: luxury box? Private being the operative word. She was fine, 324 00:20:46,359 --> 00:20:49,720 Speaker 1: just where she was, thank you, and the manager knew 325 00:20:49,760 --> 00:20:52,320 Speaker 1: that she was not fine. He needed to get her out, 326 00:20:52,359 --> 00:20:54,520 Speaker 1: and needed to get her out now. She had already 327 00:20:54,600 --> 00:20:58,520 Speaker 1: ruined enough of his guest experiences, and the manager stood 328 00:20:58,520 --> 00:21:01,840 Speaker 1: his ground with the security guard standing next to him. Amy, 329 00:21:01,880 --> 00:21:04,080 Speaker 1: I had the guards. She didn't have the energy for 330 00:21:04,119 --> 00:21:09,159 Speaker 1: this fine upstairs in the luxury box. Amy was restless, 331 00:21:09,160 --> 00:21:13,040 Speaker 1: Her buzz was fading. On her way to the bathroom, 332 00:21:13,320 --> 00:21:16,399 Speaker 1: she passed the theater manager in the hall, mumbling curses 333 00:21:16,440 --> 00:21:19,479 Speaker 1: at him under her breath. Why no, at it again. 334 00:21:20,960 --> 00:21:23,200 Speaker 1: On the way back to her seat, the theater manager 335 00:21:23,240 --> 00:21:26,639 Speaker 1: was standing behind the bar. Amy moved confidently towards him 336 00:21:26,680 --> 00:21:29,680 Speaker 1: and asked for another drink. The bartender looked her over 337 00:21:30,280 --> 00:21:33,560 Speaker 1: no chance. The manager offered her a glass of water, 338 00:21:34,000 --> 00:21:36,520 Speaker 1: maybe something that wasn't a hundred proof of MS Winehouse. 339 00:21:36,960 --> 00:21:40,200 Speaker 1: What kind of funckory was this? Amy refused the water. 340 00:21:40,560 --> 00:21:43,600 Speaker 1: In her mind, the manager made a scene. He was 341 00:21:43,640 --> 00:21:45,960 Speaker 1: the one who forced her to move seats, and now 342 00:21:46,000 --> 00:21:48,879 Speaker 1: he was further making a scene, refusing her service, like 343 00:21:48,920 --> 00:21:50,840 Speaker 1: she was some sort of child and she was a 344 00:21:50,880 --> 00:21:54,359 Speaker 1: grown woman. Amy raised your voice loud enough for everyone 345 00:21:54,400 --> 00:21:57,080 Speaker 1: around her to hear, who the funk do you think 346 00:21:57,160 --> 00:22:02,439 Speaker 1: you are? Okay, now he was done, The theater manager 347 00:22:02,520 --> 00:22:05,879 Speaker 1: requested that Amy leave the building. Two nearby security guards 348 00:22:05,880 --> 00:22:08,960 Speaker 1: were watching intently. She eyed them. This story was being 349 00:22:08,960 --> 00:22:11,720 Speaker 1: written as it happened. Amy could see the headline. Now, 350 00:22:12,119 --> 00:22:14,960 Speaker 1: Amy Winehouse charged with the salt after her foul mouth 351 00:22:15,040 --> 00:22:18,800 Speaker 1: tyrede fucking Amy grabbed a fistful of the manager's hair 352 00:22:19,040 --> 00:22:21,760 Speaker 1: and twisted with every ounce of force she had. Then 353 00:22:21,800 --> 00:22:23,880 Speaker 1: she lined up a kick and released a brutal boot 354 00:22:24,000 --> 00:22:27,800 Speaker 1: right to the manager's growing jackpot. He collapsed to the floor, 355 00:22:28,119 --> 00:22:31,040 Speaker 1: reeling as the guards and several other staff numbers jumped 356 00:22:31,040 --> 00:22:34,720 Speaker 1: into the fray. Amy was escorted out of the theater 357 00:22:34,840 --> 00:22:37,120 Speaker 1: in front of thunderstruck guests who were able to catch 358 00:22:37,119 --> 00:22:40,480 Speaker 1: a glimpse, and the lobby of police attachment was waiting 359 00:22:40,480 --> 00:22:43,600 Speaker 1: with open arms to deal with her. Amy was eventually 360 00:22:43,640 --> 00:22:45,840 Speaker 1: booked on a sault and had her court date set 361 00:22:45,880 --> 00:22:52,399 Speaker 1: three weeks out. Merry fucking Christmas in the courthouse was 362 00:22:52,440 --> 00:22:56,560 Speaker 1: an absolute scene. Paparazzi out in full force. This wasn't 363 00:22:56,560 --> 00:22:59,720 Speaker 1: Amy's home, this was public property. The photographer's feared no 364 00:23:00,040 --> 00:23:03,040 Speaker 1: or ordered injunction here. They took all the shots they wanted, 365 00:23:03,520 --> 00:23:05,960 Speaker 1: and man, they were glad to have Amy Winehouse back 366 00:23:06,000 --> 00:23:08,280 Speaker 1: in town, but they didn't quite get the train wreck 367 00:23:08,359 --> 00:23:12,520 Speaker 1: they were expecting. Amy walked up to the courthouse in 368 00:23:12,560 --> 00:23:16,760 Speaker 1: a miniskirt, low cut button blouse, her trademark ballerina shoes, 369 00:23:16,760 --> 00:23:21,280 Speaker 1: her hair and makeup flawless inside the courthouse, staring down 370 00:23:21,400 --> 00:23:24,800 Speaker 1: six months on the inside, the district court judge dropped 371 00:23:24,800 --> 00:23:29,119 Speaker 1: his gavel and instead sentenced Amy to a fine pounds 372 00:23:29,119 --> 00:23:32,200 Speaker 1: and costs a hundred pounds to the manager and his bollocks. 373 00:23:32,760 --> 00:23:35,200 Speaker 1: And the judge asked Amy to promise to the court 374 00:23:35,280 --> 00:23:37,160 Speaker 1: that she'd do her best to stay in the straight 375 00:23:37,160 --> 00:23:41,280 Speaker 1: and narrow for two years. And then he said something 376 00:23:41,320 --> 00:23:45,560 Speaker 1: Amy wasn't expecting. It was clear to him that she 377 00:23:45,680 --> 00:23:49,080 Speaker 1: was trying her best. Her medical reports proved that, and 378 00:23:49,200 --> 00:23:51,760 Speaker 1: so did her appearance in court, and he gave her 379 00:23:51,760 --> 00:23:56,679 Speaker 1: credit for that. Amy exited the courthouse brimming, flashed a 380 00:23:56,720 --> 00:24:00,320 Speaker 1: grin at the paparazzi. Nothing to see here, you vultures. 381 00:24:00,320 --> 00:24:02,679 Speaker 1: She took that positive energy and ran with it. She 382 00:24:02,840 --> 00:24:06,000 Speaker 1: recorded music with legend Quincy Jones. She had her first 383 00:24:06,040 --> 00:24:09,280 Speaker 1: successful show in years, a surprise appearance at a little 384 00:24:09,280 --> 00:24:12,760 Speaker 1: club gig supporting Mark Ronson No getting booed off stage, 385 00:24:13,280 --> 00:24:16,439 Speaker 1: engaged receptive crowds reveling in Amy at the height of 386 00:24:16,440 --> 00:24:21,280 Speaker 1: her powers, things did feel different, and that's when an 387 00:24:21,320 --> 00:24:25,439 Speaker 1: eight months self prescribed beachside reset an injunction against the press, 388 00:24:25,480 --> 00:24:28,480 Speaker 1: and a divorce will do for you that long lasted 389 00:24:28,560 --> 00:24:31,680 Speaker 1: seeing that the long awaited new Amy winehouse had arrived. 390 00:24:32,400 --> 00:24:34,879 Speaker 1: She was no princess, she knew that, never said she 391 00:24:35,080 --> 00:24:38,399 Speaker 1: was Fox Cinders. Indeed, maybe she could relate to some 392 00:24:38,440 --> 00:24:40,840 Speaker 1: of that story, the one she half watched at the 393 00:24:40,840 --> 00:24:44,920 Speaker 1: Milton Keys Theater. Cinderella had her own struggles to overcome, 394 00:24:45,160 --> 00:24:47,840 Speaker 1: not least of which were her sisters. They held her 395 00:24:47,840 --> 00:24:50,320 Speaker 1: back and said she would never amount to anything, but 396 00:24:50,440 --> 00:24:53,200 Speaker 1: she proved them wrong, and no doubt achieved some sort 397 00:24:53,240 --> 00:24:56,520 Speaker 1: of personal vindication at the end. Sure Amy could relate 398 00:24:56,600 --> 00:24:59,119 Speaker 1: to that. But what the story of Cinderella got wrong 399 00:24:59,480 --> 00:25:02,040 Speaker 1: is that it's stopped at the most crucial moment, the 400 00:25:02,080 --> 00:25:04,480 Speaker 1: moment that Cinders become someone that she never thought she 401 00:25:04,520 --> 00:25:07,640 Speaker 1: would be, never really wanted to be, honestly, and then 402 00:25:07,680 --> 00:25:11,479 Speaker 1: what happened She lived happily ever after? Bullshit? How does 403 00:25:11,520 --> 00:25:13,919 Speaker 1: she deal with being a fucking princess? How does she 404 00:25:14,000 --> 00:25:16,080 Speaker 1: deal with being someone that others in the kingdom fond 405 00:25:16,160 --> 00:25:20,960 Speaker 1: overlusted after and ship talked an equal measure? Cinderella wasn't real, 406 00:25:21,320 --> 00:25:25,240 Speaker 1: and neither were fairy tales. Amy Winehouse, on the other hand, 407 00:25:25,600 --> 00:25:28,080 Speaker 1: was living in the real world, so she passed in 408 00:25:28,160 --> 00:25:30,440 Speaker 1: the high, not in the high of an illicit drug 409 00:25:30,520 --> 00:25:33,280 Speaker 1: for once, but the high of being back on top 410 00:25:33,320 --> 00:25:36,280 Speaker 1: of her game. She knew the high king with a 411 00:25:36,320 --> 00:25:40,359 Speaker 1: caveat that there were no happy endings in the real world. 412 00:26:03,000 --> 00:26:07,000 Speaker 1: Blake Fielder civil was bleary eyed. He searched through his 413 00:26:07,040 --> 00:26:10,720 Speaker 1: pocket for the key card. Amy Winehouse leaned against him. 414 00:26:10,960 --> 00:26:15,040 Speaker 1: Both bodies required the other to remain upright. Blake unlocked 415 00:26:15,080 --> 00:26:17,280 Speaker 1: the door to their East London hotel room and the 416 00:26:17,359 --> 00:26:20,960 Speaker 1: duo staggered inside, and they were exhausted. It was late 417 00:26:21,400 --> 00:26:25,080 Speaker 1: another long night at the club. Amy collapsed on the bed. 418 00:26:25,280 --> 00:26:28,919 Speaker 1: Blake the camp to the bathroom. He prepared his nightly ritual, 419 00:26:29,200 --> 00:26:31,159 Speaker 1: the one that came in clutch. After a night of 420 00:26:31,240 --> 00:26:33,879 Speaker 1: ear rattling bass and more drinks than he could count, 421 00:26:34,400 --> 00:26:36,879 Speaker 1: he stood over the sink and produced a small piece 422 00:26:36,880 --> 00:26:40,240 Speaker 1: of tinfoil, a lighter, and ten pounds worth of white 423 00:26:40,280 --> 00:26:43,320 Speaker 1: powder from his pocket. He opened his wallet, pulled a 424 00:26:43,440 --> 00:26:46,040 Speaker 1: crisp bill, rolled it tight, and then lit the foil. 425 00:26:47,000 --> 00:26:49,720 Speaker 1: He inhaled the smoke through the bill. He felt it 426 00:26:49,800 --> 00:26:52,879 Speaker 1: fill his lungs, but taste was different than the steady 427 00:26:52,920 --> 00:26:57,160 Speaker 1: diet of cigarettes he'd inhaled all evening. The feeling was euphoric. 428 00:26:57,960 --> 00:27:00,960 Speaker 1: It reached out to every receptor like an eraser on 429 00:27:01,000 --> 00:27:05,240 Speaker 1: a chalkboard. Every negative thought or feeling was instantly wiped out. 430 00:27:05,600 --> 00:27:08,040 Speaker 1: He would call it a dream, but dreams didn't feel 431 00:27:08,080 --> 00:27:12,119 Speaker 1: this good. Blake heard a noise from behind him. He 432 00:27:12,240 --> 00:27:15,639 Speaker 1: turned around to see Amy in the doorway. She saw 433 00:27:15,680 --> 00:27:18,160 Speaker 1: what he was doing. He could tell if she was intrigued, 434 00:27:18,920 --> 00:27:22,000 Speaker 1: and this was new territory for her. She asked if 435 00:27:22,040 --> 00:27:25,159 Speaker 1: she could take a hit. Blake shook his head. He 436 00:27:25,200 --> 00:27:27,440 Speaker 1: couldn't say for sure if he didn't want her doing 437 00:27:27,520 --> 00:27:29,720 Speaker 1: heroin because he didn't want her to get hooked on 438 00:27:29,760 --> 00:27:32,439 Speaker 1: at her, because he didn't want to share a stash. 439 00:27:32,720 --> 00:27:36,840 Speaker 1: Amy kept asking, wouldn't take no for an answer. Blake 440 00:27:37,119 --> 00:27:40,080 Speaker 1: was weak. He eventually handed her the bill and lit 441 00:27:40,119 --> 00:27:43,080 Speaker 1: the foil. She did as he had done, and she 442 00:27:43,160 --> 00:27:46,879 Speaker 1: felt that rush, the rush for the first time, and 443 00:27:46,920 --> 00:27:48,840 Speaker 1: there was nothing else in the world that even came 444 00:27:48,880 --> 00:27:52,200 Speaker 1: close to the sensation. It was her key to escape, 445 00:27:52,600 --> 00:27:56,120 Speaker 1: to escape the tabloids, the fame, the pressure. She wasn't 446 00:27:56,119 --> 00:27:58,879 Speaker 1: sure where heroin took her. But it wasn't here, and 447 00:27:58,920 --> 00:28:02,520 Speaker 1: it wasn't now, and that was just all right. Amy 448 00:28:02,520 --> 00:28:05,960 Speaker 1: couldn't get enough. She and Blake went deep into dope 449 00:28:06,240 --> 00:28:09,520 Speaker 1: chase that rush for a month and then another and another, 450 00:28:09,880 --> 00:28:13,920 Speaker 1: and by month before Blake was in jail, Amy was inconsolable, 451 00:28:14,000 --> 00:28:17,159 Speaker 1: and without Blake she was in pain, not just emotional 452 00:28:17,200 --> 00:28:19,800 Speaker 1: but physical pain that there was only one thing she 453 00:28:19,920 --> 00:28:22,919 Speaker 1: knew that would help her make that pain go away. 454 00:28:25,440 --> 00:28:30,320 Speaker 1: February two, Blake Fielder civil felt the studio lights beare 455 00:28:30,400 --> 00:28:32,479 Speaker 1: down on him as he told the story about that 456 00:28:32,600 --> 00:28:35,520 Speaker 1: night in a London hotel room some six years earlier. 457 00:28:36,240 --> 00:28:39,040 Speaker 1: It wasn't just the lights bothering him. The camera lens 458 00:28:39,120 --> 00:28:41,680 Speaker 1: is stared at him like they were judging him, and 459 00:28:41,800 --> 00:28:45,400 Speaker 1: the television host, Jeremy Kyle, went right for the jugular 460 00:28:45,960 --> 00:28:48,560 Speaker 1: you gave her heroin for the first time, the host said, 461 00:28:49,040 --> 00:28:52,240 Speaker 1: more statement than question. They all already knew the answer. 462 00:28:52,520 --> 00:28:55,200 Speaker 1: They all saw Blake as a pariah. They all blamed 463 00:28:55,280 --> 00:28:57,520 Speaker 1: him for the tragedy that had befallen his ex wife 464 00:28:57,560 --> 00:29:00,520 Speaker 1: some two years earlier. They just wanted to hear him saying. 465 00:29:01,200 --> 00:29:04,680 Speaker 1: Blake nodded He admitted that he had introduced Amy to 466 00:29:04,720 --> 00:29:08,000 Speaker 1: Class A drugs just two months after they married. He 467 00:29:08,120 --> 00:29:11,800 Speaker 1: felt responsible for her addiction years later, when he felt 468 00:29:11,840 --> 00:29:15,520 Speaker 1: emasculated and humiliated after reading about Amy's affair from behind 469 00:29:15,560 --> 00:29:18,920 Speaker 1: prison bars. And maybe that was karma. What goes around 470 00:29:18,960 --> 00:29:22,400 Speaker 1: comes around. Maybe he did deserve that. Blake wasn't trying 471 00:29:22,400 --> 00:29:24,360 Speaker 1: to make a buck. He just wanted to set the 472 00:29:24,360 --> 00:29:27,320 Speaker 1: record straight. He wanted the world to understand that Amy 473 00:29:27,360 --> 00:29:30,520 Speaker 1: wasn't some pitiful junkie. She just made some bad choices, 474 00:29:30,680 --> 00:29:32,800 Speaker 1: that was all. And God damn it, some of those 475 00:29:32,800 --> 00:29:35,920 Speaker 1: bad choices were on him. Sure, he touched the spot 476 00:29:35,960 --> 00:29:37,920 Speaker 1: behind his ear where he had a tattoo that read 477 00:29:38,000 --> 00:29:40,680 Speaker 1: a m y. He liked the things. She did it 478 00:29:40,720 --> 00:29:43,440 Speaker 1: for him so that he wouldn't be alone. That she 479 00:29:43,520 --> 00:29:46,160 Speaker 1: did it out of love. And there it was that 480 00:29:46,200 --> 00:29:50,480 Speaker 1: word again. Love. Love changed the course of your life, 481 00:29:51,080 --> 00:29:54,360 Speaker 1: sometimes for better, sometimes for worse, and sometimes it was 482 00:29:54,440 --> 00:29:58,680 Speaker 1: just a losing game. Now, Blake Fielder civil sat on 483 00:29:58,720 --> 00:30:01,520 Speaker 1: a stage in front of a video audience and spewed 484 00:30:01,560 --> 00:30:04,520 Speaker 1: intimate knowledge to the same people who drove Amy mad, 485 00:30:05,160 --> 00:30:07,200 Speaker 1: the ones who took away your ability to live a 486 00:30:07,200 --> 00:30:10,520 Speaker 1: normal life. Blake pulled back the curtain and what the 487 00:30:10,560 --> 00:30:14,320 Speaker 1: public saw with some truly horrific close calls was crack, 488 00:30:14,480 --> 00:30:18,400 Speaker 1: cocaine and heroin. But it was a smoke screen because 489 00:30:18,440 --> 00:30:20,560 Speaker 1: as truthful as Blake thought he was being in his 490 00:30:20,720 --> 00:30:25,240 Speaker 1: tell all interview, the truth was he wasn't telling the 491 00:30:25,360 --> 00:30:31,840 Speaker 1: whole truth. I'm Jake Brennan and this is the seven Club, 492 00:30:33,200 --> 00:30:45,600 Speaker 1: and The seven Club is hosted and produced by me 493 00:30:45,880 --> 00:30:49,680 Speaker 1: Jake Brennan for Double Elvis in partnership with I Heart Radio. 494 00:30:50,360 --> 00:30:53,400 Speaker 1: Zeth Lundie is the lead writer and co producer. This 495 00:30:53,440 --> 00:30:56,960 Speaker 1: episode was mixed by Matt Bowden. Additional music and score 496 00:30:57,040 --> 00:31:00,640 Speaker 1: elements by Ryan Spraaker and Henry Luneta. The episode was 497 00:31:00,680 --> 00:31:04,400 Speaker 1: written by Ted Omo story and copy editing by Pata Healing. 498 00:31:05,000 --> 00:31:08,280 Speaker 1: Sources for this episode are available at Double Elvis dot 499 00:31:08,320 --> 00:31:11,560 Speaker 1: com on the twenty seven Club series page. Talk to 500 00:31:11,560 --> 00:31:14,040 Speaker 1: me on Social Act, disgrace Land pod, and hang out 501 00:31:14,040 --> 00:31:17,080 Speaker 1: with me live on my Twitch channel disgrace Land Talks. 502 00:31:17,120 --> 00:31:19,920 Speaker 1: For more news on your favorite podcast, follow at Double 503 00:31:19,960 --> 00:31:26,360 Speaker 1: Elvis on Instagram. Rock rolla, What's up for your Ears