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Speaker 1: Welcome to Katie's Crib, a production of My Heart Radio

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Speaker 1: and Shonda land Audio. Hello everybody, Katie lows here, I

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Speaker 1: am your host of Katie's Crib and welcome to season three. Wow.

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Speaker 1: I imagine all these screaming going on in my head.

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Speaker 1: It might only be in my head, or it's my

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Speaker 1: son who's asleep in his nursery on the other side

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Speaker 1: of the wall of the closet that I'm currently recording in. Okay,

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Speaker 1: I first of all need to welcome back all of

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Speaker 1: you awesome returning listeners. I also want to welcome all

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Speaker 1: of you new listeners. Thank you all so much for

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Speaker 1: tuning in. So you guys know, I started Katie's Crib

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Speaker 1: two and a half years ago. I got knocked up

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Speaker 1: on the last season of Scandal and Shonda was like, Wow,

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Speaker 1: you should have a podcast, and I was like, that

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Speaker 1: would be amazing. And here we are two and a

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Speaker 1: half years later. My son is a full blown toddler. Um.

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Speaker 1: I knew nothing when I started. I felt very loan,

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Speaker 1: and Katie's Crib has proven to be the most wonderful

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Speaker 1: mom village community I could have ever asked for. I

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Speaker 1: learned so much from you guys, all of the experts

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Speaker 1: and friends and moms and mother figures we have had

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Speaker 1: on this show, They're just everything to me. And I'm

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Speaker 1: so honored to be part of this ride with you. Guys.

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Speaker 1: We are in the middle of the pandemic and we

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Speaker 1: are launching Katie's Crib season three. What an opportunity to

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Speaker 1: come together and feel less alone and help each other

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Speaker 1: to get through this, help each other be moms and

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Speaker 1: parents during this whole thing. And I thought there is

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Speaker 1: no better guest in the world to talk to right

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Speaker 1: now to kick off season three than my friend America Ferrera.

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Speaker 1: I mean, come on, you guys know her from shows

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Speaker 1: like Ugly Betty Superstore. She's um, an executive producer and

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Speaker 1: directs the bilingual dramay Dentified on Netflix. She fights for

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Speaker 1: social justice to her organization Harness. She is a freaking superwoman.

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Speaker 1: And America made time to talk to you guys and

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Speaker 1: to me five days before she gave birth to her

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Speaker 1: second child, So she's perfect. She's the best guest season opener.

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Speaker 1: I'm very, very excited to bring you this episode. I'm

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Speaker 1: so lucky to call her a friend and be able

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Speaker 1: to pick her brain today. You guys, please welcome our

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Speaker 1: first guest, first season three of Katie's Crib America, Ferrera.

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Speaker 1: Welcome to Katie's Crib America. Ferrera. Thank you so much

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Speaker 1: for being on. You have been listening to podcasts I

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Speaker 1: saw on your Instagram, like I think because during quarantine time,

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Speaker 1: like it's sort of it's very I feel very excited

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Speaker 1: to have Katie's Crib because I think we're all feeling

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Speaker 1: very isolated right now, and podcasts are a really great

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Speaker 1: way to keep people together. Yeah, but first and foremost,

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Speaker 1: congrats on your pregnancy. Thank you. How are you feeling

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Speaker 1: is it? I'm so curious. People have always said to me,

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Speaker 1: every pregnancy is different, every labor is different, blah blah blah.

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Speaker 1: Is that true? Like, are you having a complete different

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Speaker 1: experience or is it more similar than different. It's pretty different,

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Speaker 1: I mean, you know, not in like the ways that

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Speaker 1: you expect necessarily, like you know, I actually we this

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Speaker 1: is maybe t M I, but we like not no

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Speaker 1: such thing. They basically both have the exact same do date,

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Speaker 1: which means like if you know, if your back up

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Speaker 1: nine months like me, we you know we It means

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Speaker 1: you guys are really feeling each other around a certain time, Ye,

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Speaker 1: exactly were consistent. So it was so weird because I

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Speaker 1: was like I had this thought of like, oh my gosh,

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Speaker 1: everything's gonna happen exactly the same, Like it was just

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Speaker 1: a thought. And as soon as that thought entered my mind,

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Speaker 1: another voice was like, nothing is ever the same. Where

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Speaker 1: are you sever? Are you sick? Were you more sick?

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Speaker 1: Less sick? Like more tired less tired? You see, it

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Speaker 1: was less that stuff like I was. I was more

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Speaker 1: nauseous sooner, and it the nausea lasted longer, and I

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Speaker 1: was nauseous for more of the day this time around,

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Speaker 1: So like the nausea was just sort of more intense.

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Speaker 1: It did kind of go away at that, like transitioning

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Speaker 1: from first to second trimester, it did go away, thank god,

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Speaker 1: it was. It was worse this time than before, but

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Speaker 1: by no means, like to the extent that I've had

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Speaker 1: friends experience, like, you know, vomiting every day for nine months.

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Speaker 1: That seems like how anyone ever gets through that. It's

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Speaker 1: like how you know mothers are full on superheroes because

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Speaker 1: I don't understand how that happens. Yeah, and the exhaustion

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Speaker 1: was more intense, but a lot of people are like, well,

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Speaker 1: you're also like chasing a toddler around, so so there's

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Speaker 1: that like you don't just get to like lie down

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Speaker 1: every time you're like tired and take a nap. I

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Speaker 1: was working and on set, and like i'd come home

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Speaker 1: and every day around like you know, I'd usually come

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Speaker 1: home around four thirty five and like have a couple

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Speaker 1: of hours with us and like play with him and

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Speaker 1: feed him and putting over his nap. I mean, I

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Speaker 1: would come home and before I knew knew I was pregnant,

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Speaker 1: it was like I got hit by a truck at

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Speaker 1: four thirty every day and I must have been I

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Speaker 1: don't know, like two weeks pregnant, three weeks pregnant. I

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Speaker 1: didn't even know, like I hadn't taken a test, but

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Speaker 1: I was like, oh, this is a different kind of tip.

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Speaker 1: But part of it is like you've done it once before,

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Speaker 1: so you kind of know what to look out for,

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Speaker 1: and you're kind of like, oh, this is familiar, Like

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Speaker 1: I know what this is. And maybe maybe I was

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Speaker 1: that tired the first time around and I just didn't

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Speaker 1: know what to attribute it to, you know. So but

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Speaker 1: those things were relatively small I'm talking more about like

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Speaker 1: global pandemic. We need to talk about all of this

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Speaker 1: ship like we need to talk about for our moms

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Speaker 1: out there. How I'm curious because I think, like, have

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Speaker 1: you been again? I just think you're such an inspiring mom.

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Speaker 1: Do you talk to Baz about the state of the

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Speaker 1: world in which we're in right now? Obviously he's so

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Speaker 1: young and like does he even understand? Yeah, you know,

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Speaker 1: he's very young. He's not even too yet. He'll be

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Speaker 1: too in a month. Fish, So no, we're not talking

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Speaker 1: to him about like, you know, the virus and people

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Speaker 1: being sick. We were sort of advised through his um

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Speaker 1: like classes to sort of let them know, like everyone's

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Speaker 1: on a break, Like it's a break, you know, So

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Speaker 1: we keep and for him. Like he's such a social butterfly,

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Speaker 1: and he loves everyone who comes in and out of

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Speaker 1: our house, Like you know, he's super social. I remember

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Speaker 1: that one kid's birthday party. I saw him. He was

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Speaker 1: like after he was like going good. He was like

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Speaker 1: like eating, walking around, like he's very independent, does his thing. Yeah,

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Speaker 1: he like loves watching the Gardener's Garden, the yard every week.

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Speaker 1: He like loves watching the pool Man, like you know,

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Speaker 1: so every day he's like pool man, Calman coming, you know,

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Speaker 1: like everyone he's used to seeing. Like for the first

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Speaker 1: couple of weeks, he would ask almost every day and

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Speaker 1: he'd be like, like music class, will let class, like

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Speaker 1: all these things that he was used to doing. And

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Speaker 1: it was just like heartbreaking to say everyone's on a break,

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Speaker 1: will will We'll go back soon. Everyone's on a break.

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Speaker 1: And you know, that's as much as I can say

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Speaker 1: over and I love that idea. I haven't said break.

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Speaker 1: That's like a really good word. Who ever gave that

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Speaker 1: to you? That's really helpful? Are you? I mean, for me,

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Speaker 1: this is the most time consecutively I've spent with my

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Speaker 1: kid because I went back to work, and I know

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Speaker 1: you did too. Um, I'm kind of freaked out about

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Speaker 1: that transition because he's so happy, like he loves that

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Speaker 1: mommy and Daddy are around seven, and even though he

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Speaker 1: misses his friends in his little classes or he says

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Speaker 1: playground a lot because he's like, why can't I go

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Speaker 1: to the playground? But how do you feel a out

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Speaker 1: whenever this shifts into something else, you know, I feel like,

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Speaker 1: you know, last summer, when the world was in a

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Speaker 1: very different place. I took four weeks off and we

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Speaker 1: were on like a family summer vacation, and it was

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Speaker 1: four weeks of just us, and I saw how how

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Speaker 1: much he grew and developed and and how excited he

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Speaker 1: was to have us around all the time, and just like,

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Speaker 1: you know what it meant to him to be with

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Speaker 1: mom and dad and and have us there with him.

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Speaker 1: And you know, I think that those times when when

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Speaker 1: they can, when they're possible, are wonderful for for him. Um,

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Speaker 1: but that's also just like not the reality of every day.

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Speaker 1: And he has a very awesome, rich life on a

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Speaker 1: day to day basis. He has an incredible nanny who

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Speaker 1: we love so much and is so attentive to him

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Speaker 1: and interactive, and he goes to music class and he

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Speaker 1: goes to this class. So it's like his life is

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Speaker 1: so rich that there's no losing for him. It's like

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Speaker 1: he's either out like enjoying and he's very very active,

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Speaker 1: loves running and climbing and being in the park. And

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Speaker 1: for now, it's it's this and I think we just

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Speaker 1: sort of try to, you know, milk it for what

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Speaker 1: it is and and have this special time together this

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Speaker 1: because baby number two is coming basically any day now.

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Speaker 1: Thank you for being on Katie's crib. This is amazing,

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Speaker 1: this this was going to be this time was sort

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Speaker 1: of going to be this for us anyway. That's so interesting.

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Speaker 1: This is sort of your nesting hunger down time anyway,

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Speaker 1: because the baby could have come already, Like it's like right,

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Speaker 1: so you know, it's not so different from how we

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Speaker 1: had planned to spend the summer, you know, other than

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Speaker 1: obviously started seven weeks ago for us, and there's less

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Speaker 1: he can do in terms of like go out and

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Speaker 1: run around at parks and beaches and that type of thing.

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Speaker 1: But you know, it's a lot, because I think it's

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Speaker 1: a lot when you're trying to keep everything else up.

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Speaker 1: Like for now, I'm still on zooms and on calls,

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Speaker 1: and you have some projects and development and so we're

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Speaker 1: still on you know, moving things forward and and working.

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Speaker 1: I think once I have the privilege of sort of

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Speaker 1: saying I'm now on maternity leave and it's just us

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Speaker 1: the time of like bringing a baby number two, transitioning

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Speaker 1: us just having this kind of quiet time as a family,

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Speaker 1: there's there's sort of like a real silver lining and

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Speaker 1: having like the global energy support that internal turn of work.

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Speaker 1: We're not missing it. You know, you're not missing anything. Yeah,

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Speaker 1: it's not just you stopping your life. It's like, no,

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Speaker 1: everything has pretty much stopped. Are you struggling at all

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Speaker 1: with anxiety? Um, about being pregnant during this time? I

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Speaker 1: know we have a lot of listeners who are pregnant

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Speaker 1: during this time, and I've been watching endlessly about you know,

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Speaker 1: there's just not that much studied on it yet. But

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Speaker 1: thankfully the smaller case slow that they have, thank god,

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Speaker 1: you know, the majority of mothers and babies and everyone

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Speaker 1: comes out okay, even the moms who have like really

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Speaker 1: struggled with coronavirus and given birth totally. Yeah. I mean

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Speaker 1: there's the anxiety about the virus itself, which is like

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Speaker 1: you don't want to get sick. You don't want your

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Speaker 1: children to get sick, you don't want a newborn baby

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Speaker 1: to get sick. Obviously, I try to stay away from

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Speaker 1: the news cycle because I think you can drive yourself

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Speaker 1: absolutely insane. Um. The very few times that I like

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Speaker 1: have caught like some sensational story because obviously it's happening,

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Speaker 1: it's not the norm, but like young people are getting

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Speaker 1: sick and like little people are getting sick and little

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Speaker 1: people are suffering, Like I just know, like I have

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Speaker 1: to put up my filters because I don't have the

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Speaker 1: emotional capacity to let that in. And I knew. I

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Speaker 1: realized that really early on for me, like you know,

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Speaker 1: there's information that you need to know to be informed,

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Speaker 1: and and unfortunately in this day age, it's like you

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Speaker 1: have to be able to stop yourself and know like

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Speaker 1: what's healthy for you and what's not. And for me,

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Speaker 1: like I could feel my heart rate and my anxiety

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Speaker 1: and my blood brush are and like everything and go up.

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Speaker 1: And also not to be not being able to close

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Speaker 1: sitting there with all these news stories, you know, swirling

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Speaker 1: in my head and just realizing early on that like

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Speaker 1: I had to be very disciplined about what I let

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Speaker 1: in because it just doesn't serve you, especially in a

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Speaker 1: time where like you know, you just don't need that

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Speaker 1: added stress when you're pregnant. And I feel so similar

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Speaker 1: like I've had to really I really was going down

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Speaker 1: a bad spiral in the first couple of weeks, and

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Speaker 1: I was like, this is I'm not sleeping, like I'm

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Speaker 1: making myself feel mentally like I just like it was like,

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Speaker 1: this is are you a big meditator or I know

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Speaker 1: you've been in your life, you've had periods of like

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Speaker 1: being really physical and and like is that something that

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Speaker 1: you're finding help with right now? With the mental stuff

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Speaker 1: like you know, just staying calm and at peace for

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Speaker 1: your baby or you just like I'm just resting and

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Speaker 1: that's it, and I'm not looking at ship And I

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Speaker 1: definitely have my ways of like staying grounded. I mean,

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Speaker 1: I think so there's the anxiety about the virus obviously

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Speaker 1: that you know, I think that we're doing all the things.

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Speaker 1: You know, if you're doing all the things to stay

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Speaker 1: socially distance and clean and healthy and you know, safe,

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Speaker 1: like you can't really worry too much about it. You

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Speaker 1: just have to do the things that that that our

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Speaker 1: common sense and hope that that that that's enough. Even

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Speaker 1: when I had my first child, childbirth triggers for me

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Speaker 1: some really deep you know, fears and and and and

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Speaker 1: what I realized the first time around was our culture

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Speaker 1: and our culture around mothering and our kind of consumer

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Speaker 1: culture around preparing women to become mothers, like has very

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Speaker 1: little to do with what you actually or rather what

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Speaker 1: I actually needed in that time. It is so imps

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Speaker 1: right now that could not have been a tore Steve.

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Speaker 1: I'm just like, you know, I would like kill me,

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Speaker 1: Like I don't want to like pick out baby clothes

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Speaker 1: and pin the poopy diaper on the donkey, Like I

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Speaker 1: don't want to do any of that. Ship Like I

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Speaker 1: like some really primal ancestral like fear of dying in

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Speaker 1: childbirth is coming up, and like where do I get

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Speaker 1: to talk about that? You know? I used to wake

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Speaker 1: up at him in the middle of the night and

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Speaker 1: be like, first of all, like guys don't know, like

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Speaker 1: like I was just like people still fucking die in

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Speaker 1: childbirth and like as of fifty years ago, like and

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Speaker 1: that's not happening, but like fifth years ago, like everybody

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Speaker 1: did or whatever. And I'm like, this is I'm being

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Speaker 1: asked to do something that I am very, very very

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Speaker 1: We're not talking about how afraid I am right now, Like, well,

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Speaker 1: that's the thing, right, Like where in the culture does

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Speaker 1: that exist for women to be for their real deeper

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Speaker 1: fears to be seen and and you know, whether they're

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Speaker 1: physical or or whether they're just about like your life

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Speaker 1: shift and your identity shift and like you think, like, oh,

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Speaker 1: you did it one time, but you know it's all

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Speaker 1: going to change again. It's like, what does it mean

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Speaker 1: to be a mother? It took two children? What's that

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Speaker 1: going to do to my relationship with the first one?

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Speaker 1: What's that going to How's that going to impact my marriage?

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Speaker 1: How's that going to impact my ability to be the

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Speaker 1: person I want to be in the world. And like

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Speaker 1: all those things that are there the first time around

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Speaker 1: are slightly different because you've been through it what once before,

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Speaker 1: but but your world is still gonna change and shift

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Speaker 1: in a big way. And so you know, the first

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Speaker 1: time around, I really had to kind of get in

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Speaker 1: touch with what I needed it and then and then

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Speaker 1: find the community to help me get that. And you know,

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Speaker 1: I I asked some women very close to me to

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Speaker 1: like help me design like a ceremony, like a transition ceremony.

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Speaker 1: Like I was like, I don't want a baby shower.

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Speaker 1: I want people to witness and acknowledge like this deep

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Speaker 1: identity shift that I'm going through and transformation. And like

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Speaker 1: that's what I needed and I'm so grateful I reached

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Speaker 1: out And it was a little awkward to sort of

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Speaker 1: say to the people in my life, like this is

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Speaker 1: actually what I want and meet and crave right now,

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Speaker 1: So can you guys give me this? And they were

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Speaker 1: so happy to and grateful to, and in a way

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Speaker 1: was like really nourishing to them because it would have

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Speaker 1: felt so fake for them to be like making your

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Speaker 1: I mean, it's really the baby shower. We should I

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Speaker 1: got to do a whole episode on that. I was

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Speaker 1: I was so on in a spotlight and I know

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Speaker 1: I'm an actor, but my god, I was so uncomfortable,

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Speaker 1: like by that, you know what I mean, but feeling

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Speaker 1: like I had to say something like I just was

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Speaker 1: like I just felt uncomfortable. I was just like whoa,

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Speaker 1: Like I'm so sweaty. I have never been this. I hadn't.

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Speaker 1: So I've a friend, a brilliant friend named Prea Parker,

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Speaker 1: who was this book called The Art of Gathering like

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Speaker 1: How We Gather and Why it Matters? And she's amazing.

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Speaker 1: She has her own podcast, Prea Parker. She's incredible. And

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Speaker 1: I didn't really know her well and we hadn't had

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Speaker 1: these conversations at this time when I was sort of

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Speaker 1: feeling my way through like what do I actually need?

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Speaker 1: But you know, she's this master facilitator, peace and conflict

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Speaker 1: resolution moderator, And she talks about like asking the question of,

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Speaker 1: like what is the purpose of this gathering, like all

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Speaker 1: of these events that we do, weddings, birthdays, baby showers,

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Speaker 1: like we do them and almost in this protocol way

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Speaker 1: that really has so much more to do with like

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Speaker 1: consumerism and sort of you know, checking off boxes versus

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Speaker 1: asking the question like what do I need and how

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Speaker 1: is this gathering going to fulfill those needs for me?

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Speaker 1: And I feel like that's a question that as you're

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Speaker 1: a mother or becoming a mother or you know, becoming

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Speaker 1: mother of more children, like you have to be your

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Speaker 1: own best protector of asking that question like what do

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Speaker 1: I need? And how is this thing serving that need?

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Speaker 1: And once I had my like grounding ceremony with the

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Speaker 1: women that I consider like my coven, like I sobbed

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Speaker 1: and cried and you know, you know, let things go

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Speaker 1: and made space for other things. Then like Ryan and

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Speaker 1: I had like a dance party like crazy baby shower

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Speaker 1: and so there's nothing wrong. The thing is, like there's

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Speaker 1: nothing wrong with like cupcakes and poopy diaper games, but

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Speaker 1: it's just not enough for me. Like I don't think

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Speaker 1: that it really addresses the needs of of what that

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Speaker 1: what that emotional landscape is of becoming a mom and

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Speaker 1: having your identity shift that way, and and so all,

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Speaker 1: like I you know, I did it all once, so

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Speaker 1: I thought like, great, I have the road map, Like

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Speaker 1: we'll just do that again. Then, you know, a lot

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Speaker 1: was different when I was around twenty weeks pregnant. You know,

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Speaker 1: they realized my placenta was low lying, you know, so

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Speaker 1: since then it's been like, a is this going to

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Speaker 1: be a C section? And so I've never had a

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Speaker 1: c section, so that was something brand new of like, oh, okay,

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Speaker 1: this is really being different or could be different, and

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Speaker 1: and and then I had to you know change, you know,

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Speaker 1: things that I had planned on in terms of like

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Speaker 1: you know, trying to work out through my pregnancy, not intensely,

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Speaker 1: but just like to stay feeling strong and like that

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Speaker 1: had to go out the window because you know, I've

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Speaker 1: been advised to to not overdo it. Oh yeah, when

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Speaker 1: you have a low lying placenta, if you work out

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Speaker 1: really hard, there can be like there can be there. Yeah. Yeah.

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Speaker 1: So so like basically every plan that basically every single

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Speaker 1: plan that I made in this pregnancy was just like

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Speaker 1: systematically like out the window. But how great is that

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Speaker 1: this baby is already doing his job, Like the baby

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Speaker 1: is already saying like, oh you thought you did this before,

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Speaker 1: you thought you knew what you were doing. No, no, no,

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Speaker 1: I'm different, Like I'm this is going to be totally different. Moms.

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Speaker 1: I do take a little bit of pride in the

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Speaker 1: fact that, like, even as I had the thought this

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Speaker 1: is going to be exactly the same, there was another

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Speaker 1: voice that was like, girl, don't you know anything, Like

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Speaker 1: nothing is ever going to be the same, And I

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Speaker 1: was that voice was right. So I have a little

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Speaker 1: pride in the fact that I knew the expectation that

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Speaker 1: things would be the same was a ridiculous expectation, But

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Speaker 1: you still have it. I would have it too. I

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Speaker 1: mean like I'm like breastfeeding was like so shitty for

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Speaker 1: me the first time around, and I've been like, oh

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Speaker 1: my god, I got this, Like I already climbed that

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Speaker 1: fucking mountain, like I'm good to go, and I'm like,

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Speaker 1: in my the other side of me is like you

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00:20:58,440 --> 00:21:00,840
Speaker 1: was saying, like, what's it going to be? Something else

378
00:21:00,920 --> 00:21:02,240
Speaker 1: is going to bite you in the ass. You just

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00:21:02,280 --> 00:21:06,560
Speaker 1: don't know what it is. Yet in quarantine. Like a

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Speaker 1: lot of the things I found really helpful towards the

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Speaker 1: end of pregnancy last time, like acupuncture. I had this

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Speaker 1: incredible osteopath that I saw once a week who made

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Speaker 1: me feel like it's great and I had so much energy,

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Speaker 1: and I could walk for three hours and feel amazing.

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Speaker 1: Like I can't walk right now, I can't walk twenty

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Speaker 1: minutes without being like this is painful and I have

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Speaker 1: to sit down. So all of these things that I

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Speaker 1: had come to lean on and felt like okay, I

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Speaker 1: built my support system, Like none of those things are

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Speaker 1: available to me right now. And so it really is

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Speaker 1: this deep like exercise and practice of like just continually

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Speaker 1: letting go, like you gotta let that go. You gotta

393
00:21:51,720 --> 00:21:55,200
Speaker 1: let that go, you gotta let that go, and and

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Speaker 1: and really invest a lot more trust in myself and

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Speaker 1: in the fact that like I can do this, Like

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Speaker 1: I can do this, I'm going to be okay, I'm

397
00:22:04,640 --> 00:22:07,879
Speaker 1: well taken care of. It's not gonna look and feel

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Speaker 1: and have all of the amenities and the bits and

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Speaker 1: bobs of the first time around, but like this is

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Speaker 1: what it is. And so I have to kind of

401
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Speaker 1: stay connected to the fact that this this baby is

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Speaker 1: going to come into the world, and it's gonna be

403
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Speaker 1: me and this baby, and we're gonna do it and

404
00:22:27,760 --> 00:22:30,600
Speaker 1: and we're we're gonna be We're gonna have everything we

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00:22:30,680 --> 00:22:36,160
Speaker 1: need um and and so that's the meditation over which

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00:22:36,200 --> 00:22:41,239
Speaker 1: is brilliant. I mean, you sound so, I mean, but

407
00:22:41,280 --> 00:22:44,520
Speaker 1: it's it's totally Listen. There are times like yesterday I

408
00:22:44,560 --> 00:22:46,840
Speaker 1: was on the phone with my acupuncturists where I was like,

409
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Speaker 1: just show me where to push, like show me where

410
00:22:50,160 --> 00:22:53,040
Speaker 1: to like press so that this abotica goes away, you know.

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Speaker 1: And you know, talking about postpartum, like did you have

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Speaker 1: any sort of postpartum depression with Baz or were you

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Speaker 1: immediately in love? Did you? Not that that's even the measure,

414
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Speaker 1: but I mean, like, did you feel did you walk

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Speaker 1: into it like with positivity? Did you? Did you was

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Speaker 1: it a slow burn? I felt really good after postpartum, uh.

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Speaker 1: And I I definitely had some big hormonal shifts and

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Speaker 1: some big hormonal moments and events, But I don't think

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Speaker 1: that I struggled with depression. Maybe like the blues every

420
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Speaker 1: now and then, but but I had it pretty great

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Speaker 1: the first time around. You know, I know that every

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Speaker 1: pregnancy can be different, so so who knows. But but

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Speaker 1: what I'm saying is like there is a very deep

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Speaker 1: well of emotion and anxiety that I have tapped into

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Speaker 1: now and then, and it just feels so overwhelming at

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Speaker 1: the moment that I can't let myself dwell there, you know.

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00:23:50,000 --> 00:23:52,800
Speaker 1: But I know that like, yeah, there's a lot of

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Speaker 1: ship going on right now, and to be pregnant in

429
00:23:55,080 --> 00:23:57,320
Speaker 1: this moment and to have to be in and out

430
00:23:57,320 --> 00:24:00,919
Speaker 1: of hospitals and doctors offices because you're at the end,

431
00:24:00,960 --> 00:24:03,720
Speaker 1: which means you're in the doctor's office all the time

432
00:24:03,920 --> 00:24:06,159
Speaker 1: like they've been and all this stuff I've read that

433
00:24:06,320 --> 00:24:08,160
Speaker 1: you know, there are people who if you're if you're

434
00:24:08,160 --> 00:24:11,159
Speaker 1: okay and your doctors recommending it, you can not do

435
00:24:11,280 --> 00:24:13,280
Speaker 1: every two weeks at the beginning, you know, for safety,

436
00:24:13,320 --> 00:24:15,680
Speaker 1: precautious reasons. But now that you're at the end, there's

437
00:24:15,720 --> 00:24:18,760
Speaker 1: no way around that. Like you're in pandemic and you're

438
00:24:18,800 --> 00:24:22,119
Speaker 1: going to the doctor all the time, and now my

439
00:24:22,200 --> 00:24:25,280
Speaker 1: husband can't come with me, you know, to these appointments,

440
00:24:25,320 --> 00:24:29,520
Speaker 1: and so you know, I am trying to be as

441
00:24:29,920 --> 00:24:32,640
Speaker 1: grounded and as like put my big girl pants on

442
00:24:32,760 --> 00:24:35,160
Speaker 1: and just be like the whole world is dealing with this.

443
00:24:35,359 --> 00:24:37,800
Speaker 1: You can do this, like this is the time your

444
00:24:37,800 --> 00:24:40,040
Speaker 1: baby chose to come into the world for some reason.

445
00:24:40,160 --> 00:24:43,520
Speaker 1: So here we go, right, And but like I said,

446
00:24:43,560 --> 00:24:47,280
Speaker 1: like there is real there is real anxiety, there's real emotion,

447
00:24:47,359 --> 00:24:51,200
Speaker 1: there's real fear that feels very like like a lot

448
00:24:51,240 --> 00:24:55,359
Speaker 1: of it would be there anyway. I think it feels

449
00:24:55,400 --> 00:24:59,760
Speaker 1: amplified and it feels overwhelming to kind of go there

450
00:24:59,800 --> 00:25:03,800
Speaker 1: and access it in this moment. And you know, I

451
00:25:03,840 --> 00:25:06,919
Speaker 1: put out like one Instagram post about it like a

452
00:25:06,960 --> 00:25:09,359
Speaker 1: couple of weeks ago. It was so beautiful. I haven't

453
00:25:09,400 --> 00:25:11,840
Speaker 1: it was so inspiring. It was like it was it

454
00:25:11,920 --> 00:25:15,119
Speaker 1: was expecting mothers during the pandemic, and it was just like, really,

455
00:25:16,000 --> 00:25:18,960
Speaker 1: it was really lovely. Thank you. I don't know if

456
00:25:18,960 --> 00:25:24,320
Speaker 1: you can hear my toddscrep I love it on Katie's crib.

457
00:25:26,880 --> 00:25:33,680
Speaker 1: But the wave of mothers who were spot like pregnant

458
00:25:33,720 --> 00:25:36,879
Speaker 1: women responded who were like it's my first, or I

459
00:25:36,920 --> 00:25:39,840
Speaker 1: delivered yesterday, or you know I had to deliver alone,

460
00:25:40,040 --> 00:25:42,639
Speaker 1: or I was in that window where the where my

461
00:25:42,680 --> 00:25:45,280
Speaker 1: partner wasn't allowed in. I mean, lord, I mean I

462
00:25:45,359 --> 00:25:48,359
Speaker 1: was reading these comments and like sobbing and just thinking

463
00:25:48,400 --> 00:25:52,400
Speaker 1: like it's a very heightened time to be in this

464
00:25:52,480 --> 00:25:55,159
Speaker 1: state that already is a heightened place to be in

465
00:25:55,240 --> 00:25:57,440
Speaker 1: this and then to be in it with this global

466
00:25:57,520 --> 00:26:01,040
Speaker 1: event happening, and look just to be separated from your

467
00:26:01,440 --> 00:26:04,840
Speaker 1: social network, like the fact that nobody I love is

468
00:26:04,840 --> 00:26:08,439
Speaker 1: going to get to meet my baby. You know that,

469
00:26:08,760 --> 00:26:10,040
Speaker 1: you know that no one's going to be there to

470
00:26:10,119 --> 00:26:12,679
Speaker 1: like hug me and hold me, and like, you know,

471
00:26:13,480 --> 00:26:16,399
Speaker 1: some friends who like the first time around, like cooked,

472
00:26:16,720 --> 00:26:18,720
Speaker 1: Like she lived in my lives in my building in

473
00:26:18,720 --> 00:26:21,040
Speaker 1: New York and she like cooked for me for two

474
00:26:21,080 --> 00:26:23,680
Speaker 1: weeks after Bass came, and like, you know, just all

475
00:26:23,720 --> 00:26:27,800
Speaker 1: of that stuff of like knowing that you're held and

476
00:26:30,800 --> 00:26:33,480
Speaker 1: and being like, okay, it's just us. It's me and

477
00:26:33,600 --> 00:26:37,480
Speaker 1: Ryan and and our son, and we do thank god,

478
00:26:37,480 --> 00:26:41,560
Speaker 1: we're our nanny is quarantining with us, so she's here

479
00:26:41,600 --> 00:26:44,640
Speaker 1: to help us. Um, but we're just like here we go.

480
00:26:44,840 --> 00:26:49,320
Speaker 1: You know. It's like it's unprecedented this time, and we're

481
00:26:49,400 --> 00:26:53,480
Speaker 1: just going to stay focused on how lucky we are

482
00:26:53,560 --> 00:26:56,439
Speaker 1: to have all the things we do have and trust

483
00:26:56,520 --> 00:26:58,560
Speaker 1: that like we can get through this and it's going

484
00:26:58,600 --> 00:27:01,360
Speaker 1: to be okay. And and and it might even be

485
00:27:01,440 --> 00:27:04,879
Speaker 1: wonderful and beautiful and it might bring about, you know,

486
00:27:04,960 --> 00:27:16,760
Speaker 1: some circumstances that we feel great about. Have you been

487
00:27:16,840 --> 00:27:20,359
Speaker 1: super into like how do you talk to Baz about

488
00:27:20,440 --> 00:27:25,160
Speaker 1: becoming an older sibling? How do you plan on introducing him?

489
00:27:25,200 --> 00:27:26,919
Speaker 1: Are you big into that or you just sort of

490
00:27:26,920 --> 00:27:28,880
Speaker 1: like will trust or instincts and see how it goes,

491
00:27:29,119 --> 00:27:31,880
Speaker 1: or you like like you have a whole thing you've

492
00:27:31,920 --> 00:27:34,960
Speaker 1: got planned. Yeah. I was super anxious about it because

493
00:27:35,000 --> 00:27:37,639
Speaker 1: I was definitely one of those moms who like you know,

494
00:27:37,800 --> 00:27:40,080
Speaker 1: held baths and I'm like, I'm going to ruin your

495
00:27:40,119 --> 00:27:44,119
Speaker 1: life by bringing in another. Meanwhile, I'm the youngest of

496
00:27:44,400 --> 00:27:48,560
Speaker 1: six children, like you know, and I'm probably projecting a

497
00:27:48,600 --> 00:27:52,680
Speaker 1: lot onto him of like like, um, now you're gonna

498
00:27:52,680 --> 00:27:57,080
Speaker 1: have to like fight for attention, my attention. Um. But

499
00:27:57,720 --> 00:28:02,600
Speaker 1: I did right classes with as UM and we do

500
00:28:02,920 --> 00:28:09,520
Speaker 1: UM parent child classes at the Waldorf Steiner Schools, and

501
00:28:09,640 --> 00:28:12,600
Speaker 1: we sort of, you know, off their recommendations. And also

502
00:28:12,640 --> 00:28:15,960
Speaker 1: one of our mutual friends, Angelique Cabral, who is like

503
00:28:16,240 --> 00:28:19,840
Speaker 1: my go to mama for everything, and also she just

504
00:28:19,880 --> 00:28:22,719
Speaker 1: had her second so I was like, tell me everything,

505
00:28:22,880 --> 00:28:25,560
Speaker 1: and you know, her first was basically around Basie's age,

506
00:28:25,560 --> 00:28:28,800
Speaker 1: so I'd just like tell me everything. So he's so

507
00:28:28,960 --> 00:28:32,760
Speaker 1: young he can't really conceptualize it, so like burdening him

508
00:28:32,800 --> 00:28:35,080
Speaker 1: too early on with the fact that like everything's going

509
00:28:35,119 --> 00:28:37,560
Speaker 1: to change and a baby is coming and and it

510
00:28:38,400 --> 00:28:42,520
Speaker 1: just s and they you know, and the advice was like,

511
00:28:43,080 --> 00:28:45,560
Speaker 1: don't put that on them too soon, you know, and

512
00:28:45,600 --> 00:28:47,920
Speaker 1: when the time starts to come, which is around now,

513
00:28:48,480 --> 00:28:51,840
Speaker 1: like you can talk about it and you know, trying

514
00:28:51,880 --> 00:28:54,360
Speaker 1: to talk about it in ways that are that won't

515
00:28:54,400 --> 00:28:58,240
Speaker 1: trigger like scariness, you know, just even you know, Angelie

516
00:28:58,600 --> 00:29:01,440
Speaker 1: mentioned the like you know, not saying like you're going

517
00:29:01,480 --> 00:29:03,360
Speaker 1: to be a big brother and she's going to be

518
00:29:03,400 --> 00:29:05,880
Speaker 1: your little sister and she's the baby and you're a

519
00:29:05,920 --> 00:29:09,320
Speaker 1: big boy, is like just trying to imagine like, well,

520
00:29:09,360 --> 00:29:11,960
Speaker 1: he's not even two, so like he's a baby too,

521
00:29:13,040 --> 00:29:15,600
Speaker 1: and he and that might be scary to be like

522
00:29:15,960 --> 00:29:18,560
Speaker 1: get out of the baby's seat, kid like babies coming,

523
00:29:18,600 --> 00:29:20,600
Speaker 1: you know, like just even stuff like that that like

524
00:29:20,640 --> 00:29:22,800
Speaker 1: oh yeah, that makes sense. Like I don't want to

525
00:29:22,800 --> 00:29:26,480
Speaker 1: make him feel like he's not little and small and

526
00:29:26,480 --> 00:29:28,680
Speaker 1: and has these needs and and has the right to

527
00:29:28,760 --> 00:29:31,720
Speaker 1: need me in these ways. So like small things like

528
00:29:31,760 --> 00:29:36,040
Speaker 1: that are helpful. Yeah. She was the person who first

529
00:29:36,080 --> 00:29:39,480
Speaker 1: told me, like she brought her second home from the

530
00:29:39,520 --> 00:29:41,480
Speaker 1: hospital and that's where they met, and I it had

531
00:29:41,520 --> 00:29:44,160
Speaker 1: never even occurred to me. I mean, however, anyone wants

532
00:29:44,160 --> 00:29:45,120
Speaker 1: to do it is how they want to do it.

533
00:29:45,160 --> 00:29:48,200
Speaker 1: But but because we're so conditioned in movies and stuff

534
00:29:48,240 --> 00:29:49,840
Speaker 1: like that to be like, well, no, like the sibling

535
00:29:49,920 --> 00:29:52,120
Speaker 1: comes to the hospital and that's where they meet the baby.

536
00:29:52,520 --> 00:29:55,080
Speaker 1: And she was the first person who ever said to me, like, well,

537
00:29:55,600 --> 00:29:58,520
Speaker 1: he might be scared, like to go to a hospital

538
00:29:58,520 --> 00:29:59,800
Speaker 1: he has never been to before, Like why don't you

539
00:29:59,840 --> 00:30:01,520
Speaker 1: just the baby home and you can do it? Like

540
00:30:02,200 --> 00:30:04,080
Speaker 1: when I was like, oh my god, that's an option,

541
00:30:04,240 --> 00:30:07,360
Speaker 1: Like I just didn't even occur to me. Yeah. Yeah,

542
00:30:07,400 --> 00:30:10,200
Speaker 1: and that's going to be our situation because he can't

543
00:30:10,200 --> 00:30:13,760
Speaker 1: even come visit us. So so which is like that

544
00:30:13,800 --> 00:30:16,360
Speaker 1: decision was made for us. But yeah, just even the

545
00:30:16,640 --> 00:30:18,840
Speaker 1: you know, Angelie gave me such great advice. She was

546
00:30:18,920 --> 00:30:22,840
Speaker 1: like what she did was spend time alone with her first,

547
00:30:23,400 --> 00:30:26,280
Speaker 1: you know, say mommy's back, I used you and like

548
00:30:26,440 --> 00:30:28,240
Speaker 1: read a book and have a little bit of time

549
00:30:28,240 --> 00:30:31,680
Speaker 1: of just like mommy and and toddler, and and then

550
00:30:31,840 --> 00:30:34,880
Speaker 1: she had her partner walk in, her husband walking with

551
00:30:34,920 --> 00:30:38,640
Speaker 1: the baby and put the baby in in her toddler's

552
00:30:38,760 --> 00:30:41,640
Speaker 1: arms so that it wasn't like, oh, mommy came home

553
00:30:41,680 --> 00:30:43,840
Speaker 1: and she's holding the baby, and now the baby's in

554
00:30:43,880 --> 00:30:47,480
Speaker 1: her arms, like even just those psychological things of like

555
00:30:47,800 --> 00:30:51,720
Speaker 1: oh yeah, like let the introduction not be like this

556
00:30:51,800 --> 00:30:54,720
Speaker 1: is now Mommy's new attachment, Like this is now Mommy's

557
00:30:54,760 --> 00:30:57,800
Speaker 1: new sidekicks. So you know, just small things like that,

558
00:30:57,880 --> 00:30:59,880
Speaker 1: and who knows. I mean, her daughter seems to be

559
00:31:00,040 --> 00:31:02,760
Speaker 1: us doing really well. Yeah, she's great, she's doing great,

560
00:31:03,560 --> 00:31:06,760
Speaker 1: So we'll see. I mean, I have all these nerves

561
00:31:06,760 --> 00:31:09,040
Speaker 1: about it, but I've also had so many friends say like,

562
00:31:10,080 --> 00:31:14,080
Speaker 1: you know, it's also really beautiful to see the kids together.

563
00:31:14,240 --> 00:31:17,400
Speaker 1: It's a lot of times like the toddlers are really excited,

564
00:31:18,000 --> 00:31:20,760
Speaker 1: you know, And so so I've been anticipating all the

565
00:31:20,840 --> 00:31:24,040
Speaker 1: like stressful things, but I'm also trying to stay open

566
00:31:24,080 --> 00:31:26,760
Speaker 1: that like that this will that he'll love it, you know,

567
00:31:26,840 --> 00:31:30,400
Speaker 1: and that he'll love the new baby and love love

568
00:31:30,480 --> 00:31:32,840
Speaker 1: that he has a role to play. I mean, I've

569
00:31:32,840 --> 00:31:36,480
Speaker 1: started saying to him, like I keep telling Angelicia to

570
00:31:36,480 --> 00:31:39,520
Speaker 1: like write a mommy book or something. Because every day

571
00:31:39,640 --> 00:31:41,960
Speaker 1: she's been on this podcast two times and it's coming

572
00:31:41,960 --> 00:31:45,120
Speaker 1: back up for another one. Like for sure, um, you

573
00:31:45,160 --> 00:31:48,800
Speaker 1: know she said, uh, oh wait now pregnancy bright and

574
00:31:48,800 --> 00:31:51,200
Speaker 1: I lost my train. She was giving you advice about, oh,

575
00:31:51,240 --> 00:31:53,920
Speaker 1: empowering them to give them a job or something. Yeah,

576
00:31:53,960 --> 00:31:57,440
Speaker 1: or just to say, like, you're older, so you know

577
00:31:57,560 --> 00:32:00,080
Speaker 1: more things, So you get to teach the baby be

578
00:32:00,160 --> 00:32:02,600
Speaker 1: the things you know. You know, like you know how

579
00:32:02,600 --> 00:32:04,320
Speaker 1: to wash your hands, you get to teach the baby

580
00:32:04,320 --> 00:32:06,240
Speaker 1: how to do that. You know how to put your

581
00:32:06,280 --> 00:32:07,800
Speaker 1: choice away, You get to teach the baby how to

582
00:32:07,840 --> 00:32:10,560
Speaker 1: do that. So just giving him like a role in

583
00:32:10,560 --> 00:32:13,600
Speaker 1: in the baby, in the baby's life and that sort

584
00:32:13,640 --> 00:32:15,680
Speaker 1: of thing. But you know, I'm sure there's gonna be

585
00:32:17,040 --> 00:32:19,560
Speaker 1: ups and downs. I what I love about Rye and

586
00:32:19,600 --> 00:32:23,320
Speaker 1: what I love about Waldorf and that there's some intersections

587
00:32:23,360 --> 00:32:26,040
Speaker 1: there is that there's just at the core of it,

588
00:32:26,040 --> 00:32:29,840
Speaker 1: it just assumes like a deep respect for the child,

589
00:32:30,320 --> 00:32:36,040
Speaker 1: that they're a little human being, budding and growing, experiencing

590
00:32:36,080 --> 00:32:39,600
Speaker 1: the world with all these big feelings and emotions, and

591
00:32:39,680 --> 00:32:41,680
Speaker 1: that while it's easy as an adult to be like

592
00:32:41,760 --> 00:32:44,600
Speaker 1: because I said so, because Mommy can't because I like

593
00:32:44,720 --> 00:32:48,560
Speaker 1: that there's that that there's just that reminder to really

594
00:32:48,600 --> 00:32:53,440
Speaker 1: acknowledge that that their feelings are like big and real

595
00:32:53,600 --> 00:32:56,600
Speaker 1: and valid and and let them in on it, I mean,

596
00:32:57,280 --> 00:32:59,440
Speaker 1: the amount and they can take the lead to like

597
00:32:59,480 --> 00:33:02,080
Speaker 1: I think he is going to be so like That's

598
00:33:02,080 --> 00:33:04,240
Speaker 1: what I always loved about Rye stuff, was like, oh,

599
00:33:04,320 --> 00:33:07,480
Speaker 1: like I think they don't know. Like I'm just like

600
00:33:08,120 --> 00:33:10,160
Speaker 1: like they know, like they just sort of give them

601
00:33:10,160 --> 00:33:12,160
Speaker 1: the space and you're like, oh, they already know that,

602
00:33:12,200 --> 00:33:14,440
Speaker 1: Like you know what I mean. Like he blows my

603
00:33:14,520 --> 00:33:19,040
Speaker 1: mind with how much he understands every day. Absolutely. Um.

604
00:33:19,160 --> 00:33:23,120
Speaker 1: Can we talk about like sharing your Latin X culture

605
00:33:23,280 --> 00:33:25,240
Speaker 1: with bas and the baby. Do you have a lot

606
00:33:25,280 --> 00:33:29,520
Speaker 1: of like rituals or traditions or how you do that

607
00:33:29,640 --> 00:33:33,160
Speaker 1: in your household? Um? Yeah, So you know I was

608
00:33:33,240 --> 00:33:37,000
Speaker 1: raised in a Spanish speaking home. My parents were immigrants. Um,

609
00:33:37,040 --> 00:33:41,480
Speaker 1: but I was also like very americanized. You know. I

610
00:33:41,520 --> 00:33:44,240
Speaker 1: was number six, so all my siblings, so my older

611
00:33:44,280 --> 00:33:46,920
Speaker 1: siblings like who who, I can't even imagine that, Like

612
00:33:47,000 --> 00:33:49,120
Speaker 1: I can't now having one and you're about to do

613
00:33:49,240 --> 00:33:51,640
Speaker 1: like six. I mean, wow, I know, I don't know.

614
00:33:52,120 --> 00:33:55,400
Speaker 1: Just like what in the world. But my like my

615
00:33:55,480 --> 00:34:00,400
Speaker 1: older siblings, they spoke only Spanish until they went to school, right,

616
00:34:00,520 --> 00:34:02,560
Speaker 1: so they had that foundation. But by the time I

617
00:34:02,600 --> 00:34:06,200
Speaker 1: came around, all my oldert winds are speaking English. So

618
00:34:06,200 --> 00:34:08,239
Speaker 1: so I just went like straight to English. I mean

619
00:34:08,280 --> 00:34:11,160
Speaker 1: I understood Spanish because my mother spoke Spanish, my father

620
00:34:11,239 --> 00:34:14,360
Speaker 1: spoke Spanished, my aunt and grandparents and like everyone spoke

621
00:34:14,400 --> 00:34:16,839
Speaker 1: Spanish around me, So that was a big part of it.

622
00:34:16,880 --> 00:34:21,200
Speaker 1: But but I was also like very very American and

623
00:34:21,280 --> 00:34:24,640
Speaker 1: English speaking from the get go. So you know, I

624
00:34:24,680 --> 00:34:27,960
Speaker 1: struggle with ways just in my own life to to

625
00:34:28,600 --> 00:34:33,680
Speaker 1: feel you know, connected to my my cultural roots. And

626
00:34:34,080 --> 00:34:37,680
Speaker 1: it's really important to me that Baz and baby too,

627
00:34:38,280 --> 00:34:43,799
Speaker 1: like feel that connection. And I almost, I like overcompensating

628
00:34:43,880 --> 00:34:47,560
Speaker 1: for for the connection that you know, that that I

629
00:34:47,600 --> 00:34:50,719
Speaker 1: didn't get. It was really important to me that he'd

630
00:34:50,760 --> 00:34:54,600
Speaker 1: be surrounded by people who speak Spanish. My Spanish is okay,

631
00:34:54,640 --> 00:34:58,520
Speaker 1: but it's not like amazing. So our nanny speaks to

632
00:34:58,600 --> 00:35:01,520
Speaker 1: him in Spanish all day. You know, we have so

633
00:35:01,560 --> 00:35:03,400
Speaker 1: many friends who are in and out of the house,

634
00:35:03,520 --> 00:35:06,120
Speaker 1: not right now obviously, who speak to him in Spanish

635
00:35:06,200 --> 00:35:10,080
Speaker 1: all day. Like he uses a lot of Spanish words.

636
00:35:10,120 --> 00:35:14,200
Speaker 1: He understands Spanish really well, so the language and giving

637
00:35:14,239 --> 00:35:19,160
Speaker 1: him the gift of like the gift of the language

638
00:35:19,280 --> 00:35:23,520
Speaker 1: and hoping really hoping fingers crossed that like that just

639
00:35:23,560 --> 00:35:25,920
Speaker 1: always feels like a natural thing to him in a

640
00:35:25,960 --> 00:35:28,760
Speaker 1: way that it wasn't always for me, Like is really

641
00:35:28,800 --> 00:35:34,480
Speaker 1: important to me. And we blast Latino music all the time, Like,

642
00:35:35,280 --> 00:35:37,400
Speaker 1: I mean, his favorite song that he asked for twenty

643
00:35:37,440 --> 00:35:40,920
Speaker 1: five times a day is Jay Valvin's Local Contigo, and

644
00:35:40,960 --> 00:35:44,319
Speaker 1: like it's like literally any Latin beat that comes on,

645
00:35:44,520 --> 00:35:47,000
Speaker 1: he starts moving. I'm like, Oh, you've got it. You're

646
00:35:47,080 --> 00:35:50,920
Speaker 1: like a little Latino brother. I love it. Um my

647
00:35:51,040 --> 00:35:53,560
Speaker 1: husband plays, oh brother, we're art that like the Whitest

648
00:35:53,640 --> 00:35:56,319
Speaker 1: Hike is soundtrack you can imagine. I'm like, you are

649
00:35:56,360 --> 00:35:58,680
Speaker 1: equal parts both of these things, so you get to

650
00:35:58,760 --> 00:36:02,200
Speaker 1: be both of them. But um, you know, yeah, it

651
00:36:02,360 --> 00:36:06,160
Speaker 1: is really important to me that he feels that cultural connection.

652
00:36:06,280 --> 00:36:10,200
Speaker 1: But I think I think for me, my feeling of

653
00:36:10,239 --> 00:36:13,000
Speaker 1: connection had so much to do with the people I

654
00:36:13,080 --> 00:36:15,560
Speaker 1: knew and loved to are part of that culture. So

655
00:36:15,600 --> 00:36:20,600
Speaker 1: surrounding him with people who represent that culture for him,

656
00:36:20,600 --> 00:36:23,840
Speaker 1: whom he loves, Yeah, it's going to take care of

657
00:36:23,840 --> 00:36:27,680
Speaker 1: itself translates into him loving his culture and and feeling

658
00:36:28,000 --> 00:36:30,600
Speaker 1: deeply connected to that. But it is really important to me.

659
00:36:40,880 --> 00:36:45,200
Speaker 1: So you just helped launch the drama Dentified on Netflix

660
00:36:45,320 --> 00:36:48,040
Speaker 1: and you're the executive producer. You've directed a number of episodes.

661
00:36:48,080 --> 00:36:50,520
Speaker 1: I can't even believe, like what you've been doing in

662
00:36:50,600 --> 00:36:53,080
Speaker 1: this year, which is the most insane year that I've

663
00:36:53,080 --> 00:36:56,800
Speaker 1: ever lived. But please tell me what your work life

664
00:36:56,960 --> 00:36:59,359
Speaker 1: This is a huge topic on Katie's crib always Um

665
00:37:00,080 --> 00:37:06,279
Speaker 1: your work life balance as a mom and as a director, actress, producer, activist.

666
00:37:06,400 --> 00:37:10,080
Speaker 1: I mean, your list is very long. Clearly you mentioned

667
00:37:10,080 --> 00:37:12,040
Speaker 1: you have a nanny. You have a great village of

668
00:37:12,239 --> 00:37:14,200
Speaker 1: it sounds like friends who are ahead of you in

669
00:37:14,239 --> 00:37:17,719
Speaker 1: the mom department that you text and ask questions and

670
00:37:18,400 --> 00:37:21,799
Speaker 1: ask for help. Um, is it? Was it a hard

671
00:37:21,800 --> 00:37:23,840
Speaker 1: transition for you to go back to work. Do you

672
00:37:23,960 --> 00:37:26,680
Speaker 1: love that you work? And you also like, how do

673
00:37:26,719 --> 00:37:29,680
Speaker 1: you feel about being a mom and working the crazy

674
00:37:29,680 --> 00:37:32,040
Speaker 1: hours you do? I mean, I love working and I

675
00:37:32,120 --> 00:37:36,320
Speaker 1: love being the person that I am out in the world,

676
00:37:36,360 --> 00:37:38,279
Speaker 1: and I love my work and I feel connected to

677
00:37:38,320 --> 00:37:42,960
Speaker 1: it and I can't imagine not having that. You know,

678
00:37:43,280 --> 00:37:46,040
Speaker 1: there are certainly times where, like like I said, like

679
00:37:46,680 --> 00:37:49,600
Speaker 1: last summer, going away and being like for this amount

680
00:37:49,640 --> 00:37:52,480
Speaker 1: of time, like that is not what I'm doing, Like

681
00:37:52,560 --> 00:37:54,960
Speaker 1: I'm just here, I'm just with my family, I'm just

682
00:37:55,880 --> 00:37:59,480
Speaker 1: I can certainly sink into times where you know, I

683
00:37:59,800 --> 00:38:03,600
Speaker 1: don't feel the need to be constantly connected to that work,

684
00:38:03,960 --> 00:38:07,120
Speaker 1: you know, outer world identity, but you know, it's the

685
00:38:07,200 --> 00:38:10,279
Speaker 1: totality of my life and my identity like has a

686
00:38:10,320 --> 00:38:12,000
Speaker 1: lot to do with who I am in the world

687
00:38:12,000 --> 00:38:13,799
Speaker 1: and the work I do and the work I care about.

688
00:38:14,239 --> 00:38:18,360
Speaker 1: And it was a bit excruciating. I mean not physically

689
00:38:18,400 --> 00:38:22,200
Speaker 1: and logistically. To me, it was all mental and psychological.

690
00:38:22,920 --> 00:38:25,719
Speaker 1: And I feel like I'm still kind of working through that.

691
00:38:25,800 --> 00:38:29,319
Speaker 1: And I from what I hear, like it doesn't necessarily

692
00:38:29,320 --> 00:38:34,000
Speaker 1: ever go away that yeah, And for me it was

693
00:38:34,080 --> 00:38:36,200
Speaker 1: like I loved going. I went back to work when

694
00:38:36,480 --> 00:38:38,720
Speaker 1: bas was like ten weeks. We went back to set.

695
00:38:39,120 --> 00:38:41,000
Speaker 1: I had a baby nurse with me. He was there.

696
00:38:41,080 --> 00:38:43,560
Speaker 1: I was pumping, but I was so hard on myself,

697
00:38:43,560 --> 00:38:46,320
Speaker 1: where like if I had a ten minute turnaround on set,

698
00:38:47,320 --> 00:38:50,319
Speaker 1: I would run back to the trailer and like be

699
00:38:50,440 --> 00:38:52,839
Speaker 1: with him, play with him, hold him, and then run

700
00:38:52,880 --> 00:38:54,440
Speaker 1: back to set and work. And at the end of

701
00:38:54,480 --> 00:38:58,280
Speaker 1: the day, I was like, I'm exhausted and I feel

702
00:38:58,280 --> 00:39:02,120
Speaker 1: like I'm always failing and and you're doing like at

703
00:39:02,160 --> 00:39:04,480
Speaker 1: both You're just so You're like, it's like you're not

704
00:39:04,520 --> 00:39:07,000
Speaker 1: doing your best at either. But I like, I called

705
00:39:07,040 --> 00:39:09,239
Speaker 1: all my friends you were moms, and I'm just like,

706
00:39:09,320 --> 00:39:12,240
Speaker 1: what do I do? And you know, they have given

707
00:39:12,239 --> 00:39:15,000
Speaker 1: me such incredible advice, and they're just like, you gotta

708
00:39:15,040 --> 00:39:18,440
Speaker 1: be you gotta take those ten minutes and be by yourself.

709
00:39:18,480 --> 00:39:21,759
Speaker 1: It's okay to you know, BAS was fourteen months I

710
00:39:21,760 --> 00:39:25,560
Speaker 1: think before I let myself go back to working out,

711
00:39:26,239 --> 00:39:28,719
Speaker 1: because that wasn't an hour. An hour that you weren't

712
00:39:28,760 --> 00:39:31,280
Speaker 1: with him, or you weren't working on your rash project

713
00:39:31,360 --> 00:39:35,719
Speaker 1: or whatever. Wasn't exactly. It's like if I wasn't working

714
00:39:36,000 --> 00:39:38,400
Speaker 1: because I had to be working, then I felt like

715
00:39:38,440 --> 00:39:40,960
Speaker 1: I had to be with him, and if I wasn't,

716
00:39:41,000 --> 00:39:43,560
Speaker 1: I felt guilty. Like I remember a moment where I

717
00:39:43,560 --> 00:39:46,440
Speaker 1: went to get my teeth cleaned at the dentist. I

718
00:39:46,560 --> 00:39:49,080
Speaker 1: brought my baby nurse and Baz and I let her

719
00:39:49,160 --> 00:39:54,040
Speaker 1: walk around the block as I got my teeth cleaned.

720
00:39:54,080 --> 00:39:56,920
Speaker 1: Up the dentist, and I sat in the chair feeling

721
00:39:57,040 --> 00:40:00,000
Speaker 1: like if something happens to my baby while I'm getting

722
00:40:00,080 --> 00:40:04,560
Speaker 1: my teeth cleaned, like it's going to be all I'll

723
00:40:04,560 --> 00:40:06,400
Speaker 1: never forget. And I'm like, oh my gosh. I was

724
00:40:06,440 --> 00:40:09,520
Speaker 1: like I can't believe that I can't go and get

725
00:40:09,520 --> 00:40:14,120
Speaker 1: my teeth cleaned at the dentist without feeling like I'm

726
00:40:14,360 --> 00:40:18,640
Speaker 1: a terrible wasting and and I think there was an

727
00:40:18,680 --> 00:40:23,319
Speaker 1: awareness of like this isn't sustainable, it's not fair to me.

728
00:40:23,719 --> 00:40:27,080
Speaker 1: I also have the awareness that like mothers go back

729
00:40:27,120 --> 00:40:29,799
Speaker 1: to work and spend the whole day away from their

730
00:40:29,880 --> 00:40:32,799
Speaker 1: children because they have to, like my mom did, and

731
00:40:32,840 --> 00:40:35,759
Speaker 1: those kids turn out fine. So I need to get

732
00:40:35,920 --> 00:40:39,279
Speaker 1: my I don't got my ship under the drol Like

733
00:40:39,320 --> 00:40:41,640
Speaker 1: I've been in therapy for like decades, Like I am

734
00:40:42,120 --> 00:40:44,839
Speaker 1: great with therapy, so I just to me it was

735
00:40:44,880 --> 00:40:49,480
Speaker 1: just about not isolating myself. It was like I could

736
00:40:49,960 --> 00:40:53,280
Speaker 1: and forgiving myself. It's like my body is full of hormones.

737
00:40:53,320 --> 00:40:55,560
Speaker 1: I'm this new person. I've got a lot on my plate.

738
00:40:56,000 --> 00:41:00,919
Speaker 1: Like I'm physically a new person, I'm hormonally you know, new,

739
00:41:01,080 --> 00:41:04,320
Speaker 1: Like I got to forgive myself for the crazy thoughts.

740
00:41:04,400 --> 00:41:06,440
Speaker 1: I have to forgive myself for how tough I am

741
00:41:06,480 --> 00:41:10,200
Speaker 1: on myself. I have to forgive myself for the irrationality

742
00:41:10,320 --> 00:41:13,520
Speaker 1: and and just not isolate. I just kept reaching out.

743
00:41:13,640 --> 00:41:15,799
Speaker 1: I kept reaching out to my friends. I reached out

744
00:41:15,840 --> 00:41:18,960
Speaker 1: to my therapist. That's so good. You're so conscious, you're

745
00:41:19,000 --> 00:41:21,880
Speaker 1: so with I mean, I feel like that in itself,

746
00:41:21,880 --> 00:41:24,120
Speaker 1: Like you said, therapy for years and really knowing to

747
00:41:24,160 --> 00:41:25,960
Speaker 1: reach out and ask for help. I feel like that

748
00:41:26,280 --> 00:41:28,960
Speaker 1: is where a lot of moms trip up, is that

749
00:41:29,000 --> 00:41:33,000
Speaker 1: they go so inward and they feel ashamed or embarrassed

750
00:41:33,000 --> 00:41:34,480
Speaker 1: that they're not doing their best, and they don't want

751
00:41:34,480 --> 00:41:38,000
Speaker 1: anyone to know, so they don't ask um. And that's

752
00:41:38,040 --> 00:41:40,200
Speaker 1: the biggest thing because even if no one could give

753
00:41:40,239 --> 00:41:41,920
Speaker 1: you a good answer, and just like being able to

754
00:41:41,920 --> 00:41:44,279
Speaker 1: say it out loud and have a friend who's a

755
00:41:44,320 --> 00:41:48,440
Speaker 1: mom be like yeah, that sucks, just like Okay, I'm

756
00:41:48,440 --> 00:41:52,319
Speaker 1: not a terrible human being, Like like I'm It's like

757
00:41:52,480 --> 00:41:55,080
Speaker 1: it's okay that I feel guilty that I'm taking ten

758
00:41:55,120 --> 00:41:57,759
Speaker 1: extra minutes in the shower. It's okay that I want

759
00:41:57,800 --> 00:42:00,239
Speaker 1: to take ten minutes away from my baby, And it's

760
00:42:00,280 --> 00:42:04,120
Speaker 1: okay that I feel guilty about it, like it's all okay, Yeah,

761
00:42:04,120 --> 00:42:06,520
Speaker 1: it's okay. I remember someone, my friend came on the

762
00:42:06,520 --> 00:42:08,359
Speaker 1: podcast ran Bill Sorry, and she was the first person

763
00:42:08,360 --> 00:42:09,560
Speaker 1: that was like, oh no, like you know in the

764
00:42:09,600 --> 00:42:12,640
Speaker 1: airplane where you you put your mask on first. And

765
00:42:12,640 --> 00:42:15,640
Speaker 1: I was like, oh what and she was like yeah,

766
00:42:15,640 --> 00:42:18,040
Speaker 1: like if you like do the things that you need, like,

767
00:42:18,080 --> 00:42:20,520
Speaker 1: you're probably going to be better at all the stuff

768
00:42:20,520 --> 00:42:22,919
Speaker 1: you want to do. And I was like, oh right,

769
00:42:22,920 --> 00:42:26,400
Speaker 1: you know, all right, like because I think my husband

770
00:42:26,960 --> 00:42:29,359
Speaker 1: is much better at putting his own mask on, which

771
00:42:29,400 --> 00:42:32,279
Speaker 1: creates a lot of resentment because you're like, why don't

772
00:42:32,320 --> 00:42:35,680
Speaker 1: you feel the constant guilt I feel? Why don't you like,

773
00:42:35,880 --> 00:42:40,960
Speaker 1: how dare you take a shower? Before you know, we

774
00:42:41,120 --> 00:42:43,400
Speaker 1: had the exact same thing with my husband and I.

775
00:42:43,440 --> 00:42:46,200
Speaker 1: We both we had our son. He was seven months old.

776
00:42:46,200 --> 00:42:48,640
Speaker 1: We made our Broadway debuts together and Waitress the Musical,

777
00:42:48,640 --> 00:42:51,200
Speaker 1: And this is the exact example. During two show days,

778
00:42:51,760 --> 00:42:53,680
Speaker 1: I would I made the apartments that it was close

779
00:42:53,719 --> 00:42:56,040
Speaker 1: by the theater. I would run home between two shows

780
00:42:56,080 --> 00:42:58,479
Speaker 1: three hours days, breastfeed, be with him for three hours,

781
00:42:58,480 --> 00:43:00,720
Speaker 1: give him his dinner, put his bath, do his bottle,

782
00:43:00,760 --> 00:43:03,000
Speaker 1: get him down and then rush back for my half

783
00:43:03,000 --> 00:43:05,719
Speaker 1: hour and your husbandam would say, stay as the theater,

784
00:43:05,920 --> 00:43:09,560
Speaker 1: take a nap, have lunch, maybe stop by, do some

785
00:43:09,680 --> 00:43:12,359
Speaker 1: like crunches or whatever, like to get himself warmed up,

786
00:43:12,360 --> 00:43:14,400
Speaker 1: like chill the funk out so that he could perform

787
00:43:14,480 --> 00:43:18,160
Speaker 1: like crazy at night. I was like, that's not good parenting,

788
00:43:19,000 --> 00:43:22,000
Speaker 1: Like you're not seeing our kid like and he was like,

789
00:43:22,239 --> 00:43:25,000
Speaker 1: I don't. I'm committed to my job today, like I

790
00:43:25,040 --> 00:43:27,120
Speaker 1: will kick ass on Monday when I'm off, Like I'm

791
00:43:27,120 --> 00:43:29,200
Speaker 1: going to be a kick asstad on Monday. But like

792
00:43:29,480 --> 00:43:31,759
Speaker 1: and I was like, you're a dick, I know. I

793
00:43:31,800 --> 00:43:33,640
Speaker 1: mean there was a lot of judgment and a lot

794
00:43:33,640 --> 00:43:37,920
Speaker 1: of resentment going on, um of just like you're not

795
00:43:37,960 --> 00:43:40,920
Speaker 1: as committed, you don't care as much. And I mean,

796
00:43:40,960 --> 00:43:43,319
Speaker 1: I think a lot of things contribute to it. I'm

797
00:43:43,360 --> 00:43:48,600
Speaker 1: no biologist or social scientists, but you know, clearly the

798
00:43:48,680 --> 00:43:54,520
Speaker 1: physical experience that new moms have, or the physical experience

799
00:43:54,600 --> 00:43:57,239
Speaker 1: I had as a new mom that attached me to

800
00:43:57,320 --> 00:44:01,160
Speaker 1: my child and like makes my heart ace when he

801
00:44:01,239 --> 00:44:03,799
Speaker 1: cries in a way that it doesn't make Ryan's heart race.

802
00:44:04,280 --> 00:44:06,880
Speaker 1: Is like it's biological and there there that is a

803
00:44:06,960 --> 00:44:10,440
Speaker 1: real thing. But you know there's a there so acknowledging

804
00:44:10,480 --> 00:44:14,080
Speaker 1: just that like, okay, biologically we're having different experiences of

805
00:44:14,160 --> 00:44:17,400
Speaker 1: becoming parents and so that that means different things. And

806
00:44:17,760 --> 00:44:20,359
Speaker 1: it took me a while to like let go of

807
00:44:20,400 --> 00:44:23,120
Speaker 1: the anger and the resentment that he was better at

808
00:44:23,120 --> 00:44:26,440
Speaker 1: taking care of himself in this transition and then just

809
00:44:26,520 --> 00:44:28,800
Speaker 1: take his cues and be like, oh, yeah, I should

810
00:44:28,840 --> 00:44:32,640
Speaker 1: do that, Like I should go like get my nails

811
00:44:32,640 --> 00:44:35,560
Speaker 1: done once a month and like not feel bad about it,

812
00:44:35,640 --> 00:44:38,799
Speaker 1: you know, or go work out because I because that

813
00:44:38,880 --> 00:44:41,080
Speaker 1: does make me feel better, That does make me feel

814
00:44:41,120 --> 00:44:44,120
Speaker 1: more connected to myself. That like when I did finally

815
00:44:44,160 --> 00:44:47,840
Speaker 1: go back to working out, my commitment to the working

816
00:44:47,840 --> 00:44:50,000
Speaker 1: out had nothing to do with my body and had

817
00:44:50,040 --> 00:44:53,319
Speaker 1: everything to do with I will give myself this one

818
00:44:53,320 --> 00:44:55,839
Speaker 1: hour a day and that's what it was about. And

819
00:44:55,840 --> 00:44:57,879
Speaker 1: it was like and you know, really it was two

820
00:44:57,880 --> 00:44:59,279
Speaker 1: hours a day because it took me half an hour

821
00:44:59,320 --> 00:45:01,160
Speaker 1: to get to my train to get care what happened?

822
00:45:01,160 --> 00:45:04,600
Speaker 1: I want to get back. Did you struggle with body

823
00:45:04,640 --> 00:45:07,319
Speaker 1: image stuff at all? Like I'm you and I both

824
00:45:07,320 --> 00:45:09,920
Speaker 1: share this to you were on television at well, and

825
00:45:09,960 --> 00:45:11,719
Speaker 1: you way more than me. But you're far more in

826
00:45:11,760 --> 00:45:14,439
Speaker 1: the public eye than I am. Being pregnant the first

827
00:45:14,480 --> 00:45:17,719
Speaker 1: time and the second time. Did you struggle with that

828
00:45:17,840 --> 00:45:20,520
Speaker 1: at all? Did you embrace it? Did you? You know?

829
00:45:20,600 --> 00:45:23,600
Speaker 1: I've struggled with body image my whole life, and I

830
00:45:23,640 --> 00:45:25,640
Speaker 1: feel like I've gotten to such a place of like

831
00:45:25,840 --> 00:45:30,720
Speaker 1: fuck that ship, Like what a waste of time and energy,

832
00:45:30,920 --> 00:45:33,520
Speaker 1: and like fuck the patriarchy, and funk what my body

833
00:45:33,560 --> 00:45:35,640
Speaker 1: is supposed to look like, and also fuck you even

834
00:45:35,719 --> 00:45:38,399
Speaker 1: more when I just brought life into the world and

835
00:45:38,440 --> 00:45:40,880
Speaker 1: then my body was supposed to look like something like

836
00:45:41,080 --> 00:45:43,520
Speaker 1: fuck all of it. And I was so in that

837
00:45:43,560 --> 00:45:49,200
Speaker 1: place that like post baby, I didn't really struggle with

838
00:45:49,280 --> 00:45:51,960
Speaker 1: it because I was just like, I fucking dare somebody

839
00:45:52,000 --> 00:45:54,759
Speaker 1: to tell me to lose weight. I will like gouge you.

840
00:45:55,000 --> 00:45:59,799
Speaker 1: I t donuts to spite you, like fuck you, Like

841
00:45:59,840 --> 00:46:05,480
Speaker 1: I'm breastfeeding, I like you're wearing diapers. You're like I'm

842
00:46:05,520 --> 00:46:08,359
Speaker 1: I'm figuring out who I am and I'm a mother,

843
00:46:08,480 --> 00:46:13,040
Speaker 1: which is one of the most wonderful experiences. So so

844
00:46:13,160 --> 00:46:14,880
Speaker 1: when you went back to working out, finally, it was

845
00:46:14,920 --> 00:46:18,760
Speaker 1: more about the mental space of giving yourself the time

846
00:46:19,080 --> 00:46:23,320
Speaker 1: totally back into your body, connect to yourself, like feel

847
00:46:23,840 --> 00:46:27,000
Speaker 1: the endorphins that you get totally and like when I

848
00:46:27,040 --> 00:46:30,440
Speaker 1: got pregnant with Bass, I was training for my third triathlon,

849
00:46:30,600 --> 00:46:33,200
Speaker 1: like I had gotten into this like best shape of

850
00:46:33,239 --> 00:46:37,279
Speaker 1: my life again not for body reasons. Uh. I wrote

851
00:46:37,320 --> 00:46:39,120
Speaker 1: an article about it for The New York Times called

852
00:46:39,160 --> 00:46:42,239
Speaker 1: my first triathlon actually, but it was like really like

853
00:46:42,360 --> 00:46:46,480
Speaker 1: kind of a soul evolution to like do something that

854
00:46:46,520 --> 00:46:50,439
Speaker 1: I never really identified myself as somebody who could do that. Yeah,

855
00:46:50,440 --> 00:46:52,600
Speaker 1: the triathlon is the one where you swim in the ocean, right,

856
00:46:53,560 --> 00:46:56,759
Speaker 1: that's so hard. I when you swim a mile in

857
00:46:56,800 --> 00:46:59,400
Speaker 1: the ocean and then my by Fried play miles and

858
00:46:59,440 --> 00:47:02,400
Speaker 1: then you run a ka kay um And it was

859
00:47:03,000 --> 00:47:05,600
Speaker 1: you know, I spent like a year and a half

860
00:47:06,440 --> 00:47:09,920
Speaker 1: kind of in that kind of mentality and mindset of

861
00:47:09,960 --> 00:47:15,680
Speaker 1: like it felt so good to be this connected to

862
00:47:15,760 --> 00:47:18,480
Speaker 1: my strength and to my health and to feel like,

863
00:47:18,800 --> 00:47:20,360
Speaker 1: you know, there was nothing I couldn't do if I

864
00:47:20,360 --> 00:47:22,880
Speaker 1: wanted to do it. And so it had been a

865
00:47:22,920 --> 00:47:25,440
Speaker 1: long time since I I mean, I felt connected to

866
00:47:25,480 --> 00:47:28,160
Speaker 1: my body through my pregnancy and even through postpartum. I

867
00:47:28,160 --> 00:47:31,080
Speaker 1: felt I was very kind to myself. I gave myself

868
00:47:31,120 --> 00:47:34,320
Speaker 1: that space and time. And then I when I realized,

869
00:47:34,360 --> 00:47:37,160
Speaker 1: I'm like again more than anything, of like, I need

870
00:47:37,200 --> 00:47:39,400
Speaker 1: to start learning how to do things for me and

871
00:47:39,440 --> 00:47:42,920
Speaker 1: give myself time. The hour working out was more about

872
00:47:42,960 --> 00:47:45,800
Speaker 1: the hour of giving myself time than it was about

873
00:47:45,800 --> 00:47:49,800
Speaker 1: my body. But of course I got stronger and felt

874
00:47:49,800 --> 00:47:53,720
Speaker 1: great about how I was looking and feeling and um,

875
00:47:53,800 --> 00:47:57,160
Speaker 1: and then I got pregnant again. So and but you know,

876
00:47:57,200 --> 00:47:58,880
Speaker 1: in a way, I'm like, great, I don't want to

877
00:47:58,880 --> 00:48:01,359
Speaker 1: go back to like getting track long body and then

878
00:48:01,440 --> 00:48:04,680
Speaker 1: getting pregnant again. You know, but this time I was like, Okay,

879
00:48:04,680 --> 00:48:07,040
Speaker 1: this time, I'm gonna work out through my whole pregnancy,

880
00:48:07,120 --> 00:48:09,239
Speaker 1: even if it's just a little bit, I'm gonna work out.

881
00:48:09,280 --> 00:48:12,440
Speaker 1: I'm gonna feel strong. And then the placentic thing happened,

882
00:48:12,440 --> 00:48:15,960
Speaker 1: and the doctors were like you And that's the thing,

883
00:48:16,080 --> 00:48:18,080
Speaker 1: is like, I feel like there's an older version of

884
00:48:18,120 --> 00:48:23,759
Speaker 1: myself who would have felt like that. I that that

885
00:48:23,840 --> 00:48:27,759
Speaker 1: it was this deeper part of myself if something in

886
00:48:27,800 --> 00:48:29,759
Speaker 1: my plan wasn't going to go my way, that I

887
00:48:29,760 --> 00:48:32,360
Speaker 1: couldn't be pregnant and and stay fit the whole time,

888
00:48:32,400 --> 00:48:34,480
Speaker 1: that I that I, you know, couldn't be pregnant and

889
00:48:34,520 --> 00:48:36,920
Speaker 1: have the doctor that I needed or thought I needed,

890
00:48:36,920 --> 00:48:40,439
Speaker 1: Like five years ago or ten years ago, America, going

891
00:48:40,480 --> 00:48:43,640
Speaker 1: through this moment would have been a really different story.

892
00:48:44,120 --> 00:48:47,600
Speaker 1: You know, where you where you attached to these notions

893
00:48:47,600 --> 00:48:50,399
Speaker 1: in these plans that you have as if you're only

894
00:48:50,480 --> 00:48:53,040
Speaker 1: capable of doing the thing you need to do because

895
00:48:53,120 --> 00:48:56,960
Speaker 1: you have these other things that are making you capable.

896
00:48:57,440 --> 00:49:01,120
Speaker 1: And I feel like it's been in a journey of

897
00:49:01,200 --> 00:49:05,120
Speaker 1: letting go of that attachment and realizing like, no, I'm

898
00:49:05,160 --> 00:49:09,080
Speaker 1: capable because I'm capable, and these things helped me feel

899
00:49:09,800 --> 00:49:13,600
Speaker 1: more prepared, more connected. But without all of those things,

900
00:49:13,719 --> 00:49:17,319
Speaker 1: I still have everything I need and do what I

901
00:49:17,360 --> 00:49:20,239
Speaker 1: need to be and do, and I'm enough. And it

902
00:49:20,400 --> 00:49:24,239
Speaker 1: really like that's a place that I've had to work

903
00:49:24,360 --> 00:49:28,000
Speaker 1: really really hard to get to. M hmm. There's one

904
00:49:28,080 --> 00:49:30,080
Speaker 1: last thing I want to talk to you about that

905
00:49:30,160 --> 00:49:34,680
Speaker 1: you are a very politically active person, and I want

906
00:49:34,680 --> 00:49:37,399
Speaker 1: to know how being a mom has shifted at all

907
00:49:37,480 --> 00:49:42,880
Speaker 1: your view of politics, what good Lord is hasn't been insane.

908
00:49:42,920 --> 00:49:47,240
Speaker 1: We're going into election time, and how do you plan

909
00:49:47,480 --> 00:49:52,560
Speaker 1: on going through that being a mom? Like I'm you know,

910
00:49:52,719 --> 00:49:56,839
Speaker 1: I wasn't a mom the last time around, and I'm

911
00:49:56,840 --> 00:50:01,480
Speaker 1: thankful actually that I wasn't because I I just was

912
00:50:01,560 --> 00:50:04,440
Speaker 1: an emotional wreck. And I don't know, I just I

913
00:50:04,480 --> 00:50:06,600
Speaker 1: don't think I have that option this time around, if

914
00:50:06,600 --> 00:50:08,000
Speaker 1: that makes sense to you know what I mean, Like,

915
00:50:08,080 --> 00:50:13,440
Speaker 1: I just think I really have. I've never felt between

916
00:50:13,520 --> 00:50:16,759
Speaker 1: pandemic and election season, and you know, having a two

917
00:50:16,800 --> 00:50:19,239
Speaker 1: and a half year old during this administration, I've never

918
00:50:19,320 --> 00:50:23,080
Speaker 1: had to like call so much on not letting those

919
00:50:23,080 --> 00:50:26,680
Speaker 1: things affect my mothering. I might be different if my

920
00:50:26,760 --> 00:50:30,320
Speaker 1: kid was older, to be honest, it probably would be um.

921
00:50:30,360 --> 00:50:31,960
Speaker 1: But how do you feel about those things? Yeah, I

922
00:50:32,000 --> 00:50:36,200
Speaker 1: think it's it's really it's really challenging and in ways

923
00:50:36,280 --> 00:50:41,759
Speaker 1: contradictory because you have a child that heightens your sensitivity

924
00:50:41,800 --> 00:50:44,600
Speaker 1: to everything happening in the world so much more. But

925
00:50:44,680 --> 00:50:47,840
Speaker 1: it also calls for all your energy and time and attention,

926
00:50:48,080 --> 00:50:52,840
Speaker 1: and you know, even in the midst of big, crazy

927
00:50:52,880 --> 00:50:56,400
Speaker 1: things happening that can feel overwhelming. You have to find

928
00:50:56,560 --> 00:50:59,480
Speaker 1: a centered nous and a calmness to be present with

929
00:50:59,520 --> 00:51:02,120
Speaker 1: your child and to give them the experience of you

930
00:51:02,320 --> 00:51:04,680
Speaker 1: and and of the world that you want them to have.

931
00:51:04,840 --> 00:51:06,840
Speaker 1: Like I don't want bays, it two years old to

932
00:51:06,880 --> 00:51:09,640
Speaker 1: feel all the anxiety of this moment. He doesn't need that.

933
00:51:09,680 --> 00:51:11,239
Speaker 1: What is he going to do with that? And he

934
00:51:11,280 --> 00:51:12,959
Speaker 1: doesn't need to feel it in me, And he doesn't

935
00:51:12,960 --> 00:51:15,359
Speaker 1: need to feel it through me. So you know, in

936
00:51:15,400 --> 00:51:21,359
Speaker 1: a way, the child forces you to find perspective and

937
00:51:21,440 --> 00:51:25,120
Speaker 1: grounding and not get lost in the throes of you know,

938
00:51:25,280 --> 00:51:29,160
Speaker 1: the hell fire that's happening. And at the same time,

939
00:51:29,600 --> 00:51:32,040
Speaker 1: the stakes are higher because you're like, this is the

940
00:51:32,080 --> 00:51:36,120
Speaker 1: world that I'm putting my children into. Um, you know,

941
00:51:36,840 --> 00:51:40,480
Speaker 1: after I had Bays, it was like right at the

942
00:51:40,560 --> 00:51:45,480
Speaker 1: time summer when all of those images of like the

943
00:51:45,560 --> 00:51:50,200
Speaker 1: children in cages were emerging, and you know, I sat

944
00:51:50,239 --> 00:51:53,359
Speaker 1: there and like sobbed and felt all these emotions and

945
00:51:53,360 --> 00:51:56,520
Speaker 1: and you know, got on a train and went to

946
00:51:56,600 --> 00:52:00,080
Speaker 1: d C and and march. You know, I had there

947
00:52:00,280 --> 00:52:04,600
Speaker 1: four week old child at home, and like still felt

948
00:52:04,680 --> 00:52:06,719
Speaker 1: compelled to get on that train and go to d

949
00:52:06,800 --> 00:52:10,960
Speaker 1: C and march with people and rally and and you know,

950
00:52:11,280 --> 00:52:14,440
Speaker 1: it was a relief to feel that passion to be like, Okay,

951
00:52:15,320 --> 00:52:16,640
Speaker 1: I'm not all of a sudden, I'm not going to

952
00:52:16,680 --> 00:52:18,080
Speaker 1: become a mom and all of a sudden not care

953
00:52:18,080 --> 00:52:21,000
Speaker 1: about the things I care about. But it was also

954
00:52:21,080 --> 00:52:23,880
Speaker 1: a moment where I had to realize, like I can't

955
00:52:23,920 --> 00:52:26,959
Speaker 1: be all things to everything and everyone all the time,

956
00:52:27,600 --> 00:52:32,360
Speaker 1: and that's narcissism and my own stuff that I have

957
00:52:32,440 --> 00:52:35,000
Speaker 1: to deal with and say, the world isn't going to

958
00:52:35,160 --> 00:52:37,520
Speaker 1: end if I have to sit this out the world,

959
00:52:37,560 --> 00:52:39,319
Speaker 1: you know, the work isn't good, not going to get

960
00:52:39,360 --> 00:52:42,440
Speaker 1: done because America is not there. It's like it's like,

961
00:52:42,960 --> 00:52:45,279
Speaker 1: in a way, your world gets bigger and your world

962
00:52:45,320 --> 00:52:48,239
Speaker 1: gets smaller at the same time, and learning to navigate

963
00:52:48,280 --> 00:52:52,799
Speaker 1: like where can I put my resources to make an

964
00:52:52,840 --> 00:52:55,799
Speaker 1: impact and a difference in the world, And where are

965
00:52:55,840 --> 00:52:58,600
Speaker 1: the times where it's like, actually, my resources have to

966
00:52:58,640 --> 00:53:01,080
Speaker 1: go to my child, them to my family and to

967
00:53:01,200 --> 00:53:04,160
Speaker 1: what's right in front of me right now, and that

968
00:53:04,280 --> 00:53:06,000
Speaker 1: has to be enough. And I don't need to be

969
00:53:06,080 --> 00:53:09,880
Speaker 1: driven by a hero complex that that tells me that

970
00:53:09,960 --> 00:53:11,799
Speaker 1: like the world's going to fall apart if I'm not

971
00:53:11,920 --> 00:53:16,160
Speaker 1: out there marching. So you know, it's it's a balance

972
00:53:16,320 --> 00:53:20,439
Speaker 1: and and um and and I and I imagine it's

973
00:53:20,440 --> 00:53:23,839
Speaker 1: one that will just keep changing. You know, I'm kind

974
00:53:23,840 --> 00:53:25,920
Speaker 1: of excited for the time, or I don't know if

975
00:53:25,960 --> 00:53:28,960
Speaker 1: excited is the right word. But you know, I'm interested

976
00:53:29,000 --> 00:53:32,040
Speaker 1: in the time where my children have an awareness of

977
00:53:32,120 --> 00:53:35,200
Speaker 1: the world, and that has to be a totally different

978
00:53:35,280 --> 00:53:38,200
Speaker 1: kind of discussion of like who they're going to be

979
00:53:38,320 --> 00:53:40,560
Speaker 1: and who we're going to be together in the world,

980
00:53:40,600 --> 00:53:43,319
Speaker 1: and being able to do things and explain to them

981
00:53:43,680 --> 00:53:46,120
Speaker 1: why those things are important, why those things matter, why

982
00:53:46,160 --> 00:53:49,520
Speaker 1: we're a part of something bigger than ourselves. So yeah,

983
00:53:49,600 --> 00:53:53,880
Speaker 1: I've definitely especially like like in this moment, you know,

984
00:53:54,200 --> 00:53:57,799
Speaker 1: I have felt a real sense of helplessness because part

985
00:53:57,840 --> 00:54:01,719
Speaker 1: of what we're being told to do is isolate and quarantine,

986
00:54:01,840 --> 00:54:05,319
Speaker 1: and that's that's the best way to help, you know.

987
00:54:05,480 --> 00:54:08,880
Speaker 1: And yet you see and it's so anti what I

988
00:54:08,960 --> 00:54:11,520
Speaker 1: do and you too. It's like we're so active, and

989
00:54:11,520 --> 00:54:14,080
Speaker 1: I'm so like hands on, and I'm so like want

990
00:54:14,120 --> 00:54:16,839
Speaker 1: to race to the fire, and it's like no, no, no no, no,

991
00:54:16,880 --> 00:54:18,640
Speaker 1: that's actually not what you're being asked to do right

992
00:54:18,680 --> 00:54:20,279
Speaker 1: It's not what you're being asked to do right now.

993
00:54:20,320 --> 00:54:24,000
Speaker 1: And also it's like it's that it's that struggle that

994
00:54:24,160 --> 00:54:27,839
Speaker 1: I deal with sometimes where I'm like, I actually, in

995
00:54:27,880 --> 00:54:31,480
Speaker 1: this moment, don't feel the urge to race to the

996
00:54:31,480 --> 00:54:34,440
Speaker 1: front line and help. I actually feel a deep internal

997
00:54:35,080 --> 00:54:39,279
Speaker 1: call to rest and be with my child or be

998
00:54:39,400 --> 00:54:42,120
Speaker 1: with this pregnancy, and like and then dealing with the

999
00:54:42,160 --> 00:54:43,960
Speaker 1: guilt of that, I'm like, oh, what does that mean

1000
00:54:44,000 --> 00:54:47,280
Speaker 1: about me? That that that, you know, my activist self

1001
00:54:47,360 --> 00:54:50,480
Speaker 1: isn't like firing on all cylinders right now and running

1002
00:54:50,480 --> 00:54:55,040
Speaker 1: out to to to the front lines like that to me?

1003
00:54:55,160 --> 00:54:58,239
Speaker 1: Is it? I think that's a struggle that anybody who

1004
00:54:58,480 --> 00:55:01,200
Speaker 1: kind of has an activist spirit and and I want

1005
00:55:01,239 --> 00:55:03,800
Speaker 1: to be out in the world making things better struggles

1006
00:55:03,800 --> 00:55:07,080
Speaker 1: with I think when you're a mom, it's a parent,

1007
00:55:08,080 --> 00:55:11,959
Speaker 1: it intensifies because you only have so much to give

1008
00:55:12,040 --> 00:55:15,800
Speaker 1: and you only have so much energy and resources and focus.

1009
00:55:15,920 --> 00:55:19,600
Speaker 1: And I have just had to learn to go easy

1010
00:55:19,680 --> 00:55:23,960
Speaker 1: on myself and to know that like my just because

1011
00:55:24,000 --> 00:55:29,000
Speaker 1: in one moment, this aspect of my identity is resting

1012
00:55:29,120 --> 00:55:32,319
Speaker 1: and this aspect is calling me to it and then

1013
00:55:32,440 --> 00:55:35,520
Speaker 1: vice versa, it doesn't mean I've lost something. It means

1014
00:55:35,560 --> 00:55:38,120
Speaker 1: that in this moment, this is what is needed of me,

1015
00:55:38,520 --> 00:55:40,920
Speaker 1: and I can trust that, and I can trust myself,

1016
00:55:41,160 --> 00:55:42,800
Speaker 1: and I can trust that I'm not going to lose

1017
00:55:42,880 --> 00:55:46,760
Speaker 1: myself by allowing myself to go to what is calling

1018
00:55:46,800 --> 00:55:51,160
Speaker 1: me at this time, and that's that's that can be

1019
00:55:51,200 --> 00:55:54,040
Speaker 1: a struggle sometimes fraught with like a lot of guilt

1020
00:55:54,080 --> 00:55:56,600
Speaker 1: and doubt and uncertainty that that I just have to

1021
00:55:56,680 --> 00:56:00,239
Speaker 1: keep on working on letting that extra bad. Did you

1022
00:56:00,320 --> 00:56:07,800
Speaker 1: go mhm um, this is God. I'm I'm so I

1023
00:56:07,840 --> 00:56:09,880
Speaker 1: could talk to you for a hundred hours. Is there

1024
00:56:09,920 --> 00:56:14,000
Speaker 1: any last parting words? This one's always the worst. I'm like,

1025
00:56:14,040 --> 00:56:15,840
Speaker 1: why do we ask this? Because I hate when it

1026
00:56:15,840 --> 00:56:20,839
Speaker 1: has to be but because I'm I just I think

1027
00:56:20,880 --> 00:56:24,480
Speaker 1: it's hard to pick one thing. But is there any

1028
00:56:24,480 --> 00:56:27,000
Speaker 1: one thing you would give moms of advice or a

1029
00:56:27,080 --> 00:56:31,279
Speaker 1: mantra or something that has worked for you, or or

1030
00:56:31,320 --> 00:56:33,640
Speaker 1: anything you want to say to mothers out there right now.

1031
00:56:33,680 --> 00:56:36,560
Speaker 1: It doesn't have to be advice. I would just say

1032
00:56:36,600 --> 00:56:41,320
Speaker 1: that every that you're doing great, that you're doing great,

1033
00:56:42,600 --> 00:56:47,960
Speaker 1: and that nothing that happens in this moment most likely

1034
00:56:48,320 --> 00:56:54,520
Speaker 1: is going to scar or ruin your children or ruin

1035
00:56:54,560 --> 00:56:58,400
Speaker 1: your relationship to them. You know, give yourself a break

1036
00:56:58,760 --> 00:57:04,680
Speaker 1: and and allow yourself to feel whatever is coming up

1037
00:57:04,960 --> 00:57:10,560
Speaker 1: without judging it, and know that that you're doing great

1038
00:57:10,640 --> 00:57:12,160
Speaker 1: and you're going to be fine, and your kids are

1039
00:57:12,200 --> 00:57:15,040
Speaker 1: going to be fine, as long as you're healthy and

1040
00:57:15,080 --> 00:57:19,320
Speaker 1: you have all the basics that you need, like the

1041
00:57:19,400 --> 00:57:22,280
Speaker 1: small decisions that you're making from moment to moment about

1042
00:57:22,560 --> 00:57:24,600
Speaker 1: how long they get to be on a screen or

1043
00:57:24,640 --> 00:57:28,360
Speaker 1: how you know, have they had enough school stimulation, have

1044
00:57:28,480 --> 00:57:31,880
Speaker 1: they played enough? Have they eaten healthy enough? Like I

1045
00:57:31,920 --> 00:57:34,120
Speaker 1: always just go back to my childhood and think, like

1046
00:57:35,080 --> 00:57:38,320
Speaker 1: my mom was in survival mode all the time. I

1047
00:57:38,440 --> 00:57:40,920
Speaker 1: was one of she she's a single mom. Was your

1048
00:57:40,960 --> 00:57:45,440
Speaker 1: single mom raising six children at work, constantly trying to

1049
00:57:45,480 --> 00:57:49,280
Speaker 1: provide and feed for feed us. Like we grew up

1050
00:57:50,040 --> 00:57:53,920
Speaker 1: kind of in a madhouse. And and I survived, and

1051
00:57:53,960 --> 00:57:58,360
Speaker 1: we survived, and like kids are strong and resilient and

1052
00:57:58,480 --> 00:58:03,760
Speaker 1: they'll get through it. And and I would just say

1053
00:58:03,800 --> 00:58:07,160
Speaker 1: that you're that, that you're doing great, and you have

1054
00:58:08,200 --> 00:58:10,479
Speaker 1: you have everything you need to get through this. And

1055
00:58:11,320 --> 00:58:14,760
Speaker 1: just give yourself a little bit of give yourself a

1056
00:58:14,760 --> 00:58:18,800
Speaker 1: little bit of slack, and allow whatever emotions and feelings

1057
00:58:18,960 --> 00:58:24,120
Speaker 1: are coming up to come up. Yeah, and just extend

1058
00:58:24,240 --> 00:58:27,960
Speaker 1: the kindness to yourself that that you would to to

1059
00:58:28,040 --> 00:58:31,560
Speaker 1: your children or to your best friend. You know, Oh

1060
00:58:31,600 --> 00:58:34,320
Speaker 1: my gosh, hallelujah. I need to take that for my

1061
00:58:34,360 --> 00:58:36,280
Speaker 1: advice I'm sitting here like I got to teach my

1062
00:58:36,360 --> 00:58:38,680
Speaker 1: husband how to give a low back massage. I'm like,

1063
00:58:38,720 --> 00:58:43,120
Speaker 1: oh god, there's nowhere to go. I just it's so weird.

1064
00:58:43,160 --> 00:58:45,280
Speaker 1: I've like in this quarantine. I'm like, I just want

1065
00:58:45,280 --> 00:58:47,000
Speaker 1: to be touched by a stranger. I want to pay

1066
00:58:47,080 --> 00:58:54,800
Speaker 1: him assuse, I know, to rub my body like very bad. Like, ah,

1067
00:58:55,520 --> 00:58:58,000
Speaker 1: this was so wonderful America. I can't thank you for

1068
00:58:58,080 --> 00:59:00,120
Speaker 1: taking it, like an hour of your time when you

1069
00:59:00,160 --> 00:59:04,440
Speaker 1: are so close to meeting your next child and it

1070
00:59:04,520 --> 00:59:09,960
Speaker 1: was so helpful and so inspiring and it's just very needed. Well,

1071
00:59:10,000 --> 00:59:12,280
Speaker 1: thank you. I mean, I know nothing, Like what do

1072
00:59:12,360 --> 00:59:14,320
Speaker 1: I know? I know nothing. All I know is like

1073
00:59:14,360 --> 00:59:18,560
Speaker 1: my experience. Um, and I'm happy to be as honest

1074
00:59:19,120 --> 00:59:21,720
Speaker 1: and open about it as possible if it makes other

1075
00:59:21,760 --> 00:59:24,680
Speaker 1: people feel more connected and more seen. And you know,

1076
00:59:24,720 --> 00:59:26,120
Speaker 1: that's the thing is, like we don't have to have

1077
00:59:26,160 --> 00:59:28,400
Speaker 1: the same experience as to just be able to see

1078
00:59:28,400 --> 00:59:33,240
Speaker 1: each other and witness and say yep, yep, yes I

1079
00:59:33,320 --> 00:59:35,960
Speaker 1: see that and I feel that and and it's all okay,

1080
00:59:36,040 --> 00:59:39,720
Speaker 1: and it's all good. You know, we deserve that, and um,

1081
00:59:39,760 --> 00:59:41,880
Speaker 1: you know, it's nice to connect. It's nice to talk

1082
00:59:41,920 --> 00:59:46,959
Speaker 1: to moms who you know are are experiencing so many

1083
00:59:47,000 --> 00:59:52,200
Speaker 1: of these internal journeys and and it's so sad that

1084
00:59:52,280 --> 00:59:54,760
Speaker 1: anyone ever feels like they have to go through those

1085
00:59:54,760 --> 00:59:57,200
Speaker 1: by themselves, like they just don't. We don't have to

1086
00:59:57,200 --> 01:00:01,600
Speaker 1: do it alone. Yeah, that's the whole Katie's Group thing.

1087
01:00:01,600 --> 01:00:04,240
Speaker 1: It's like we have moms on here, and every single

1088
01:00:04,280 --> 01:00:07,280
Speaker 1: time anyone says any story, and they can be small,

1089
01:00:07,440 --> 01:00:09,440
Speaker 1: they can be huge, they can be dramatic, they can

1090
01:00:09,440 --> 01:00:12,800
Speaker 1: be completely uneventful, and yet it's just being able to

1091
01:00:12,840 --> 01:00:15,320
Speaker 1: sit and be like, oh, like I felt that way,

1092
01:00:15,560 --> 01:00:18,520
Speaker 1: Like I totally felt that way, or I just I've

1093
01:00:18,560 --> 01:00:20,880
Speaker 1: been feeling like ship and that made me laugh, or

1094
01:00:21,720 --> 01:00:23,560
Speaker 1: that gave me the reason to say, hey, if America

1095
01:00:23,600 --> 01:00:25,640
Speaker 1: Freyre says, I can just chill for a second, not

1096
01:00:25,720 --> 01:00:29,240
Speaker 1: be so hard on myself, Like got like yeah, it's

1097
01:00:29,320 --> 01:00:33,960
Speaker 1: like that's the whole thing. Um, So thank you so much.

1098
01:00:34,600 --> 01:00:38,720
Speaker 1: I really appreciate it. I wish you the best journey,

1099
01:00:38,760 --> 01:00:44,560
Speaker 1: most beautiful birth experience and bringing your child home and

1100
01:00:45,000 --> 01:00:50,520
Speaker 1: expansion of your already beautiful and glowing family. I'm happy

1101
01:00:50,560 --> 01:00:54,080
Speaker 1: to share, I'm happy to update how it goes, and

1102
01:00:54,120 --> 01:00:56,400
Speaker 1: i really am thinking about all the moms out there

1103
01:00:56,480 --> 01:01:03,120
Speaker 1: who who are birthing and delivering in this time, um

1104
01:01:03,120 --> 01:01:05,880
Speaker 1: in all the different ways, and you know, I just

1105
01:01:05,960 --> 01:01:12,120
Speaker 1: think women are amazing and women and moms and their

1106
01:01:12,120 --> 01:01:15,480
Speaker 1: bodies are a miracle. And just the fact that like

1107
01:01:16,960 --> 01:01:18,800
Speaker 1: we don't have a choice, you have to kind of

1108
01:01:19,480 --> 01:01:22,200
Speaker 1: put your big girl pants on and get through it,

1109
01:01:22,320 --> 01:01:26,320
Speaker 1: and like that doesn't make it any less powerful and

1110
01:01:26,680 --> 01:01:30,520
Speaker 1: a miracle and amazing, and like all of them, all

1111
01:01:30,560 --> 01:01:32,880
Speaker 1: of the pregnant mamas out there right now, like I

1112
01:01:32,920 --> 01:01:35,840
Speaker 1: feel you, it's a lot. If you got this, you

1113
01:01:35,960 --> 01:01:48,680
Speaker 1: got it. Thanks so much for listening, you guys, And

1114
01:01:48,720 --> 01:01:52,280
Speaker 1: if you love hearing from a phenomenal guests like America Ferrara,

1115
01:01:52,640 --> 01:01:55,480
Speaker 1: be sure to share Katie's Crip with your crew and

1116
01:01:55,520 --> 01:01:58,440
Speaker 1: show us some love by rating and subscribing. And if

1117
01:01:58,440 --> 01:02:01,800
Speaker 1: you're itching for more exclusive content, follow us on Instagram

1118
01:02:01,880 --> 01:02:06,360
Speaker 1: or Twitter at Katie's Crib until next week. Katie's Crib

1119
01:02:06,400 --> 01:02:08,840
Speaker 1: is a production of iHeart Radio and Shonda land Audio.

1120
01:02:09,240 --> 01:02:11,440
Speaker 1: For more podcasts from I Heeart Radio, visit the I

1121
01:02:11,480 --> 01:02:14,560
Speaker 1: Heart Radio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you listen to

1122
01:02:14,600 --> 01:02:30,640
Speaker 1: your favorite shows. You never know, I'll tell you track

1123
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Speaker 1: Inde