WEBVTT - Weirdhouse Cinema Rewind: Dungeons and Dragons (2000) 0:00:04.360 --> 0:00:07.320 Hey, welcome to Weird House Cinema. Rewind. This is Rob 0:00:07.400 --> 0:00:10.879 Lamb in today's episode originally aired four eighteen, twenty twenty five. 0:00:11.160 --> 0:00:14.920 We're talking about Dungeons and Dragons, the movie from the 0:00:15.000 --> 0:00:19.480 year two thousand. Yes, the one starring Jeremy Irons. It's 0:00:19.520 --> 0:00:22.160 a lot of fun. It's rough at times, but this 0:00:22.680 --> 0:00:26.360 was the episode that we selected for the two hundredth episode, 0:00:26.600 --> 0:00:30.720 or well, the two hundredth film selection for Weird House Cinema. 0:00:30.840 --> 0:00:33.000 So without further ado, let's jump right in. 0:00:35.720 --> 0:00:42.000 Welcome to Stuff to Blow your Mind, a production of iHeartRadio. 0:00:46.200 --> 0:00:50.040 Hey you welcome to Weird House Cinema. This is Rob Lamb. 0:00:50.080 --> 0:00:53.600 And I am Joe McCormick. And today on Weird House Cinema, 0:00:53.640 --> 0:00:58.560 we've reached a milestone. It is our two hundredth film selection. 0:00:58.840 --> 0:01:01.600 A Rob did just have to wrecked me before we 0:01:01.640 --> 0:01:03.120 started here. I was going to say it was a 0:01:03.120 --> 0:01:05.280 two hundredth episode. It is not, because we had a 0:01:05.280 --> 0:01:08.399 couple of films that went more than one episode, or 0:01:09.360 --> 0:01:12.760 multiple films crammed into a single episode. But this is 0:01:12.760 --> 0:01:15.839 going to be our two hundredth one, and we're keeping 0:01:15.840 --> 0:01:19.000 with a theme we established last week where we looked 0:01:19.000 --> 0:01:21.759 at a film for our one hundred and ninety ninth 0:01:21.800 --> 0:01:24.000 film selection, we did a film set in the year 0:01:24.360 --> 0:01:29.119 nineteen ninety nine. That was the cyberslop movie Virtuosity, starring 0:01:29.160 --> 0:01:32.720 Denzel Washington and Russell Crowe. Today we decided to stick 0:01:32.720 --> 0:01:34.800 with that into a movie I guess not set in 0:01:34.840 --> 0:01:37.200 the year two thousand, but that came out in the 0:01:37.240 --> 0:01:40.280 year two thousand, and that is so the year two 0:01:40.360 --> 0:01:43.560 thousand in film in so many ways. And that is 0:01:43.600 --> 0:01:46.880 the movie Dungeons and Dragons, not the one from twenty 0:01:46.920 --> 0:01:49.960 twenty four, the old one, the one with Jeremy Irons, 0:01:50.000 --> 0:01:54.880 Thora Birch, Justin Whalen, Marlon Wayans, and Bruce Payne. What 0:01:55.200 --> 0:01:59.000 a cosmic adventure into nostalgia in the mind this was. 0:01:59.160 --> 0:02:01.440 And we're not I'll lie to you. It's not good, 0:02:01.520 --> 0:02:02.840 but it is a good time. 0:02:03.640 --> 0:02:05.960 Yeah, I want to Some of you may have follow 0:02:06.040 --> 0:02:08.360 up questions here. You might ask, well, how about some 0:02:08.400 --> 0:02:10.640 of those films that the listeners suggested for the two 0:02:10.760 --> 0:02:13.200 hundredth We I think we'll get back to some of 0:02:13.200 --> 0:02:16.360 those suggestions in later episodes, but I don't know. For 0:02:16.440 --> 0:02:18.480 my part, I begin to just feel like, oh, Man, 0:02:18.520 --> 0:02:20.400 it's so much pressure to figure out, like what is 0:02:20.440 --> 0:02:22.880 like the weird movie to do for two hundred, and 0:02:23.040 --> 0:02:25.040 falling back on the idea of like two hundred two 0:02:25.080 --> 0:02:27.800 thousand just felt a little It felt a little easier 0:02:27.919 --> 0:02:31.959 when it came to the decision making process. And another 0:02:32.080 --> 0:02:34.880 question you might be wondering, perhaps cowering a little bit 0:02:35.000 --> 0:02:37.919 in fear, are we going to do the next twenty 0:02:37.960 --> 0:02:41.760 five episodes of Weird House Cinema related to the subsequent years. 0:02:42.080 --> 0:02:45.280 I'm going to say definitely not. I don't think we 0:02:45.280 --> 0:02:48.080 could keep that up. I mean, we'll see what happens 0:02:48.120 --> 0:02:49.920 next week, but it's definitely not going to be the 0:02:49.960 --> 0:02:51.280 next twenty five episodes. 0:02:51.639 --> 0:02:53.320 Well, next week we could do two thousand and one 0:02:53.320 --> 0:02:55.040 of Space Odyssey and keep going. 0:02:55.240 --> 0:02:56.280 Yeah, well that's true. 0:02:56.400 --> 0:02:58.760 Yeah, though I don't know. I think that's more in 0:02:58.800 --> 0:03:02.320 our category of reference text rather than subject text. 0:03:02.560 --> 0:03:04.600 But we did do a core episode of stuff to 0:03:04.639 --> 0:03:07.000 Blow your Mind on two thousand and one of Space Odyssey, 0:03:07.040 --> 0:03:09.600 so there is some Space Odyssey in the vault. 0:03:10.200 --> 0:03:12.040 Now. Obviously we're gonna have a lot to say about 0:03:12.120 --> 0:03:15.400 Dungeons and Dragons as a movie, but I think we 0:03:15.440 --> 0:03:17.520 also need to appreciate right here at the top that, 0:03:17.600 --> 0:03:20.800 of course it is an adaptation of the tabletop gaming 0:03:21.000 --> 0:03:24.600 system Dungeons and Dragons. So Rob, maybe we got to 0:03:24.639 --> 0:03:26.960 start just by talking about that, like you're a little 0:03:26.960 --> 0:03:29.960 bit of the short, short version of your personal history 0:03:29.960 --> 0:03:31.560 with D and D, because I know we could both 0:03:31.600 --> 0:03:33.080 go into a lot of detail here. 0:03:33.639 --> 0:03:35.960 So yeah, first of all, just a reminder, Dungeons and 0:03:36.040 --> 0:03:40.280 Dragons dates back to the mid nineteen seventies is a 0:03:40.320 --> 0:03:43.880 role playing game. It is I often try to explain 0:03:43.920 --> 0:03:46.080 it to people who aren't that familiar with it as 0:03:46.360 --> 0:03:50.920 kind of a communal storytelling game where you have a 0:03:51.000 --> 0:03:54.320 dungeon master running the game. You have players playing characters 0:03:54.400 --> 0:03:58.640 within that game. The dungeon master is running things and 0:03:58.800 --> 0:04:01.760 is the final say on the rule, but the players 0:04:01.760 --> 0:04:04.560 are also contributing creatively to it. They are not being 0:04:04.600 --> 0:04:08.160 told a story. Everyone is collaborating on the story together, 0:04:08.720 --> 0:04:11.040 and it's just a tremendous amount of fun it is. 0:04:11.560 --> 0:04:14.200 If you've never played Dungeons and Dragons before, or some 0:04:14.480 --> 0:04:17.640 similar role playing game, I highly recommend it. It is 0:04:17.680 --> 0:04:21.960 a great social, creative hobby in pastime that is also 0:04:22.040 --> 0:04:27.200 connected to any number of additional solo hobbies in past times. 0:04:27.240 --> 0:04:29.520 It's something that has brought a lot of joy into 0:04:29.560 --> 0:04:30.080 my life. 0:04:30.560 --> 0:04:32.680 Collaborative storytelling is a good way to put it for 0:04:32.720 --> 0:04:35.880 people who aren't familiar. Imagine that essentially, the dungeon Master 0:04:36.400 --> 0:04:40.480 creates the setting and scenario, and you create a character 0:04:40.600 --> 0:04:43.880 within that setting in scenario, you say what your character 0:04:43.960 --> 0:04:46.800 in particular does in reaction to that setting and scenario 0:04:46.920 --> 0:04:49.640 created by the dungeon Master. They tell you what happens 0:04:49.640 --> 0:04:52.360 in return, and you go back and forth. Yeah. 0:04:52.480 --> 0:04:56.120 Yeah, So I don't remember exactly when I first started 0:04:56.120 --> 0:04:58.360 getting into it. I definitely had watched the old nineteen 0:04:58.400 --> 0:05:01.520 eighty three cartoon at one point, but that didn't like 0:05:01.600 --> 0:05:04.200 really pull me in all the way. It wasn't until 0:05:04.240 --> 0:05:07.000 I was in boy Scouts and I observed some of 0:05:07.000 --> 0:05:11.640 the older scouts playing dungeons and dragons. The dungeon Master 0:05:11.760 --> 0:05:15.520 kid was using his father's like pre satanic panic, like 0:05:15.600 --> 0:05:20.760 full demon monster supplements, and it was just it looked 0:05:20.760 --> 0:05:22.480 like a lot of fun. So I started getting into it, 0:05:22.560 --> 0:05:25.039 and I by you know, by the mid nineties, I 0:05:25.160 --> 0:05:30.200 was all into Forgotten Realms, Raven Loft, Kara Tour, Dark Sun, 0:05:30.279 --> 0:05:34.120 Spell Jammer, all these different worlds and subsettings within Dungeons 0:05:34.160 --> 0:05:37.680 and Dragons. I probably read more than I played, but 0:05:37.760 --> 0:05:40.160 it was still a blast. But then, around the turn 0:05:40.160 --> 0:05:43.440 of the millennium, when this film comes out, I went 0:05:43.480 --> 0:05:48.880 to college and for idiotically didn't do any non video 0:05:48.920 --> 0:05:51.400 game D and D stuff for like more than a decade. 0:05:52.040 --> 0:05:55.120 So today's movie drops at a time in which I 0:05:55.160 --> 0:05:57.640 was weirdly disinterested and out of touch with all things 0:05:57.760 --> 0:06:00.640 D and D. I think my main memory of the 0:06:00.720 --> 0:06:03.040 trailer was that, oh, it looks like it has Jeremy 0:06:03.080 --> 0:06:05.520 Irons in it. But at the same time, I was 0:06:05.960 --> 0:06:08.400 at least slightly disappointed that he appeared to not have 0:06:08.440 --> 0:06:10.160 a wizard beard or wizard hair. 0:06:10.800 --> 0:06:13.680 That's true, you know. I was trying to We'll talk 0:06:13.720 --> 0:06:15.120 more about this as we go on, but I was 0:06:15.160 --> 0:06:17.640 trying to class all the characters in the movie. I 0:06:17.680 --> 0:06:19.840 was saying, Okay, what D and D class are you? 0:06:19.839 --> 0:06:22.000 Because when you play the game, you pick a character 0:06:22.000 --> 0:06:24.159 class that tells you, like what kind of skills and 0:06:24.240 --> 0:06:27.360 powers you have. You could be a barbarian or a fighter, 0:06:27.480 --> 0:06:30.440 or a cleric or a wizard. And I was like, man, 0:06:30.720 --> 0:06:32.880 Jeremy Irons doesn't feel like a wizard because he doesn't 0:06:32.960 --> 0:06:35.400 look like a wizard. He looks I don't know, it 0:06:35.440 --> 0:06:37.480 looks like a warlock. Maybe, what do you think? 0:06:37.760 --> 0:06:40.000 Yeah, yeah, maybe more of a warlock. Look. 0:06:40.400 --> 0:06:43.039 I mean they never mentioned a packed patron or anything. 0:06:43.120 --> 0:06:46.320 But yeah. And I don't know. I don't know one 0:06:46.360 --> 0:06:48.640 hundred percent why it bugged me at the time, because 0:06:48.839 --> 0:06:50.760 I'm not really bugged by it now. But I think 0:06:50.800 --> 0:06:52.640 a big part of it was and I was having 0:06:52.640 --> 0:06:55.320 to like piece together where things fell in the timeline. 0:06:55.920 --> 0:06:58.440 I think part of it was that by April of 0:06:58.480 --> 0:07:01.240 two thousand, Today's movie came out in like December of 0:07:01.240 --> 0:07:04.960 two thousand. By April of two thousand, we already had 0:07:05.000 --> 0:07:09.200 a trailer featurette for Peter Jackson's Fellowship of the Ring, 0:07:09.560 --> 0:07:12.400 which would come out December two thousand and one, so 0:07:12.520 --> 0:07:16.200 we already had a visual taste of what was possible 0:07:16.240 --> 0:07:20.600 with live action high fantasy, and even from the trailers, 0:07:20.640 --> 0:07:23.600 it was obvious that two thousands Dungeons and Dragons was 0:07:23.800 --> 0:07:25.840 quite obviously missing the mark. 0:07:26.080 --> 0:07:29.040 God that contrast is crazy to imagine that this was 0:07:29.160 --> 0:07:33.680 almost like overlapping in time and that we're going to 0:07:33.760 --> 0:07:36.600 try not to just like be mean or rag on 0:07:36.640 --> 0:07:38.920 the movie the whole time. But yeah, the comparison is 0:07:39.000 --> 0:07:43.360 so funny. It's like imagining that trailers for The Matrix 0:07:43.400 --> 0:07:46.480 were already out when lawnmower Man was in theaters. 0:07:46.640 --> 0:07:50.040 You know, yeah, I mean it's really not fair because 0:07:50.080 --> 0:07:51.960 we're again we're talking about Lord of the Rings here, 0:07:52.360 --> 0:07:55.520 one of and arguably the most important texts in modern 0:07:55.560 --> 0:07:58.200 fantasy literature. It served as one of the one of 0:07:58.240 --> 0:08:03.120 the primary inspirations for and dragons in general, and furthermore, 0:08:03.240 --> 0:08:06.000 Peter Jackson's adaptations. No matter what your quipples might be 0:08:06.120 --> 0:08:10.400 about the finished product, they were jaw dropping cinematic spectacles 0:08:10.600 --> 0:08:15.920 that pushed the technological envelope, that energized fans and generated mainstream, 0:08:15.960 --> 0:08:19.600 popular and critical success. So it's unfair to compare this 0:08:19.720 --> 0:08:22.560 smaller picture that had I think, when all was said 0:08:22.560 --> 0:08:24.960 and done, like half the budget, so but not that 0:08:25.080 --> 0:08:28.240 small of a budget. You know, it is never going 0:08:28.280 --> 0:08:30.800 to live up to what Fellowship of the Ring was 0:08:30.840 --> 0:08:31.679 able to achieve. 0:08:32.040 --> 0:08:34.360 You Know something I was just thinking about recently with 0:08:34.480 --> 0:08:37.280 the Peter Jackson Lord of the Rings movies is I 0:08:37.320 --> 0:08:40.320 don't know if they often get enough credit for how 0:08:40.600 --> 0:08:43.840 good of a job they did simply from a writing 0:08:43.880 --> 0:08:47.240 point of view, adapting the material. We can have our 0:08:47.280 --> 0:08:49.760 complaints about, like, oh I wish Tom Bombadill had been 0:08:49.760 --> 0:08:51.800 in there. You know, I don't like that they didn't 0:08:51.840 --> 0:08:54.480 include this, or that they made this moment like, you know, 0:08:54.760 --> 0:08:58.080 there were changes introduced, and a lot of times purists 0:08:58.080 --> 0:09:00.400 can be upset by that. But I think think they 0:09:00.520 --> 0:09:04.160 really did a kind of impossible task of cramming as 0:09:04.360 --> 0:09:08.240 much of the spirit of the story into film into 0:09:08.960 --> 0:09:12.160 reasonable I mean long but still reasonable film run times 0:09:12.200 --> 0:09:16.000 as possible. It really, I think is a marvelous achievement 0:09:16.440 --> 0:09:19.080 of adaptation writing. Yeah. 0:09:19.120 --> 0:09:23.760 Absolutely, Again, it's just unfair to compare virtually anything, especially 0:09:23.800 --> 0:09:26.440 this film, to Fellowship of the Rings and the subsequent 0:09:26.440 --> 0:09:30.240 Peter Jackson Lord of the Rings films. They just succeeded 0:09:30.559 --> 0:09:31.560 in so many ways. 0:09:32.360 --> 0:09:34.720 But while we're on the subject of the differences between 0:09:34.840 --> 0:09:37.760 Fellowship of the Ring and Dungeons and Dragons as movies 0:09:37.760 --> 0:09:41.200 from around the same time, one big difference is that, 0:09:41.240 --> 0:09:44.720 of course, Fellowship of the Ring is an adaptation of 0:09:45.040 --> 0:09:48.520 a book. It's an adaptation of something that is already 0:09:48.640 --> 0:09:51.839 a fixed narrative, which is like a you know, it's 0:09:52.040 --> 0:09:55.720 a more familiar way of making a movie from existing 0:09:55.800 --> 0:09:59.320 source material. The Dungeons and Dragons movie had a very 0:09:59.559 --> 0:10:04.000 different and kind of writing assignment, which is that it 0:10:04.040 --> 0:10:08.600 was to adapt a game system or sort of a world. 0:10:08.679 --> 0:10:12.920 There is no fixed narrative of Dungeons Dungeons and Dragons. 0:10:12.920 --> 0:10:15.520 I think there are some like, you know, pre written 0:10:15.559 --> 0:10:18.440 campaigns that exist out there. Rob you can probably shed 0:10:18.440 --> 0:10:21.160 more light on that, and there may be some like common, 0:10:21.320 --> 0:10:24.240 commonly accepted sort of history things in the Dungeons and 0:10:24.280 --> 0:10:28.040 Dragons world, but there's no fixed narrative like there is 0:10:28.080 --> 0:10:31.360 in a book. Players make up their own stories. So 0:10:31.679 --> 0:10:34.000 what your job is if you're adapting this into a 0:10:34.040 --> 0:10:36.720 movie is you have to kind of make up a 0:10:36.840 --> 0:10:41.280 story that packs in a lot of details about what 0:10:41.440 --> 0:10:46.000 it's like to play the game and captures feelings of 0:10:47.040 --> 0:10:51.439 common experiences that players have when they're playing with their friends. 0:10:51.600 --> 0:10:52.640 Does does that make sense? 0:10:52.920 --> 0:10:55.000 Yeah? Yeah, try it. You have to to attempt to 0:10:55.000 --> 0:10:56.840 try and nail the vibe of the D and D 0:10:56.960 --> 0:10:59.000 world and the vibe of playing D and D at 0:10:59.000 --> 0:11:01.720 the same time, which, to be clear, are often in 0:11:01.800 --> 0:11:04.440 stark opposition to each other. You may have like a 0:11:04.520 --> 0:11:09.120 really like very serious and even dark set of events 0:11:09.120 --> 0:11:13.880 happening within the story of the game. But yet a 0:11:14.080 --> 0:11:17.000 gaming session of Dungeons and Dragons might be just full 0:11:17.080 --> 0:11:20.920 of goof off moments and laughter and so forth, and 0:11:21.000 --> 0:11:24.240 yet they can still work together at the table in 0:11:24.280 --> 0:11:26.560 a way that might be more of a struggle thematically. 0:11:26.640 --> 0:11:29.720 With a motion picture. I would argue that twenty twenty 0:11:29.720 --> 0:11:32.520 three's Dungeons and Dragons Honor among Thieves, the most recent 0:11:32.600 --> 0:11:36.240 Dungeons and Dragons film, did more of a commendable job 0:11:36.280 --> 0:11:40.280 of pulling this off, and watching today's movie, it'd be 0:11:40.320 --> 0:11:43.760 easier to momentarily put that aside if they didn't actually 0:11:43.760 --> 0:11:47.599 say honor among Thieves multiple times in the dialogue. 0:11:48.320 --> 0:11:50.000 But they didn't know that was gonna They didn't the 0:11:50.040 --> 0:11:51.240 title of the later movie. 0:11:51.679 --> 0:11:55.320 They didn't know. But it's impossible to avoid. But no, 0:11:55.400 --> 0:11:58.120 you're right, it's like they're they're adapting a vibe. They're 0:11:58.160 --> 0:12:03.960 adapting ip a world or multiple worlds and various creatures 0:12:03.960 --> 0:12:06.880 within that world, but they're not leaning on like a 0:12:07.000 --> 0:12:10.320 core text. But to be clear, even by nineteen ninety 0:12:10.360 --> 0:12:12.880 and certainly by the year two thousand, there were plenty 0:12:12.920 --> 0:12:15.720 of Dungeons and Dragons novelizations out there. I mean, they're 0:12:15.760 --> 0:12:19.720 like a million dragon Lance novels, So there was some 0:12:19.920 --> 0:12:23.120 material out there that could have leaned on, though you know, 0:12:23.200 --> 0:12:24.439 I don't I don't know, I haven't read most of 0:12:24.480 --> 0:12:29.240 those books. Not everything is you know, reasonable for adaptation 0:12:30.120 --> 0:12:33.800 and so forth. But you know, there were and are 0:12:33.840 --> 0:12:36.440 plenty of Dungeons and Dragons stories one could could go 0:12:36.520 --> 0:12:37.520 to for things like this. 0:12:38.000 --> 0:12:41.040 But one thing that makes those stories different is they're 0:12:41.080 --> 0:12:45.240 almost like they're reading a story that someone has created 0:12:45.360 --> 0:12:48.720 within the framework of the D and D world, but 0:12:48.760 --> 0:12:51.520 they're not cannon for all, like players of. 0:12:51.520 --> 0:12:55.360 D and D, right, right, Like any given person's favorite 0:12:55.360 --> 0:12:57.680 moment from Dungeons and Dragons is going to you know, 0:12:57.760 --> 0:13:01.160 be a little different from everyone else's moment if you're 0:13:01.160 --> 0:13:04.040 just talking about the tabletop experience. 0:13:04.880 --> 0:13:07.600 Yeah, So, as you said, this is something that the 0:13:07.840 --> 0:13:10.199 more recent D and D movie did a lot of. 0:13:10.240 --> 0:13:11.920 You could tell there were a lot of in jokes 0:13:11.920 --> 0:13:13.720 in the movie. And I still think the more recent 0:13:13.760 --> 0:13:16.800 movie works pretty well. I mean, I don't know, I 0:13:16.840 --> 0:13:18.880 have played D and D, but I can imagine it 0:13:18.920 --> 0:13:21.280 still works pretty well as a film even if you've 0:13:21.320 --> 0:13:23.160 never played it. But there are just a lot of 0:13:23.160 --> 0:13:26.560 little treats in there for players, because it will have 0:13:26.720 --> 0:13:30.320 the characters in the movie getting into a situation that 0:13:30.440 --> 0:13:34.440 players commonly find themselves in, and it's funny, too funny 0:13:34.440 --> 0:13:37.520 to recognize, like, oh, I can't speak with dead and 0:13:37.559 --> 0:13:40.240 I still have this many questions I can ask and 0:13:40.280 --> 0:13:43.800 we already got the information we need, you know, and 0:13:43.840 --> 0:13:45.240 that sort of thing over and over. 0:13:45.760 --> 0:13:48.200 Yeah, And also I think the other thing that the 0:13:48.240 --> 0:13:50.760 more recent film did well is that it had it 0:13:50.760 --> 0:13:55.360 did have canonical figures that one could leave the film 0:13:55.400 --> 0:13:56.880 and say, hey, I want to know about that that 0:13:57.000 --> 0:13:59.400 Lich guy. I want to know more about these Red Wizards, 0:13:59.440 --> 0:14:01.560 and they're there is material out there you can read 0:14:01.559 --> 0:14:06.400 about them. They're part of a setting. This movie doesn't really, 0:14:06.760 --> 0:14:09.640 I think, do much of that. You might say, oh, 0:14:09.640 --> 0:14:12.080 that's a neat beholder. I just saw float by. I'd 0:14:12.080 --> 0:14:14.640 like to know more about those guys. Well, there's plenty more. 0:14:14.920 --> 0:14:17.760 But yeah, it doesn't really do much with the beholders, 0:14:17.800 --> 0:14:20.360 does it. You briefly see one as a purple blob 0:14:20.440 --> 0:14:22.520 that flies off screen, and then I'm like, ooh, we're 0:14:22.520 --> 0:14:24.080 gonna come back for a beholder fight. 0:14:24.240 --> 0:14:28.200 Nope, Nope, Nope, they're basically screen savers. 0:14:28.720 --> 0:14:30.600 But anyway, as I was saying, the more recent D 0:14:30.640 --> 0:14:33.000 and D movie does a lot of that, I think 0:14:33.120 --> 0:14:35.600 this older movie does a little bit of that. There's 0:14:35.640 --> 0:14:40.360 a little bit of nodding towards kind of common player experiences, 0:14:40.360 --> 0:14:43.840 but a lot less. It feels more like they were 0:14:43.880 --> 0:14:47.080 just trying to create a story roughly within the D 0:14:47.160 --> 0:14:48.080 and D universe. 0:14:48.720 --> 0:14:52.960 Yeah, now I should say some nice things about this film. 0:14:53.000 --> 0:14:57.000 I think, yeah, yeah, I think it has some excellent locations, 0:14:57.040 --> 0:15:01.320 including the sedl Ossuary and the Checker Public. Also, I 0:15:01.320 --> 0:15:03.840 think that the Czech Republic State Opera House is used 0:15:03.880 --> 0:15:06.360 as a location at one point, and multiple other Czech 0:15:06.400 --> 0:15:09.880 locations that look really cool and they make good use 0:15:09.920 --> 0:15:10.680 of them. 0:15:10.920 --> 0:15:15.200 Gorgeous interior locations in fact, that are a quite ludicrous 0:15:15.240 --> 0:15:18.480 contrast to like It'll cut from there to a like 0:15:18.640 --> 0:15:22.800 CGI dungeon. It is just you could not imagine something 0:15:22.920 --> 0:15:25.320 more like uglier and more dingy looking. 0:15:25.720 --> 0:15:30.240 Yes, the CGI is all horrendous, but I should also 0:15:30.320 --> 0:15:32.840 point out there are some nice practical sets as well. 0:15:33.200 --> 0:15:36.680 There's that the Eye Room and the labyrinth. The Evil 0:15:36.760 --> 0:15:40.040 Layer is really nice. So there's also like anything that's 0:15:40.080 --> 0:15:43.920 not cgi in this film has at least a reasonable 0:15:43.960 --> 0:15:45.720 shot at looking okay. 0:15:46.000 --> 0:15:49.680 There there is at one point, it's toward the end 0:15:49.680 --> 0:15:51.880 of the movie. I wish it had come earlier, a 0:15:52.200 --> 0:15:55.520 quite lovely hand painted backdrop for like a a like 0:15:55.560 --> 0:15:58.200 a mad effect when they go to when they go 0:15:58.240 --> 0:16:01.440 to like the Thomas Kincaid LOTHLRII you know, yeah, yeah, 0:16:01.520 --> 0:16:03.080 but it's it's like very pretty. 0:16:03.480 --> 0:16:06.800 Yeah. Yeah. So, I mean, the practical stuff works pretty 0:16:06.840 --> 0:16:09.120 well for the most part. And then of course we 0:16:09.200 --> 0:16:11.960 have the performances. There are some definite duds in there, 0:16:12.480 --> 0:16:14.880 but who there are some there are some really fun 0:16:14.920 --> 0:16:18.400 performances to be hold on top of everything. 0:16:18.880 --> 0:16:21.080 Yeah, we'll have to talk about that. And speaking of 0:16:21.120 --> 0:16:24.760 continuing themes from last week, A list actors getting in 0:16:24.800 --> 0:16:27.800 a B movie and just giving it everything they've got, 0:16:27.880 --> 0:16:31.680 or maybe more than they've got actually, So, Rob, what's 0:16:31.680 --> 0:16:33.120 your elevator pitch for D? 0:16:33.640 --> 0:16:35.840 The main thing I came up with was complete a 0:16:35.920 --> 0:16:39.520 D and D movie before Y two K, which yeah, 0:16:39.600 --> 0:16:41.360 it comes out after Y two K, but you know 0:16:42.520 --> 0:16:45.760 they're filming it in nineteen ninety nine, and also it 0:16:46.400 --> 0:16:49.720 comes at it's the end of a long journey to 0:16:49.760 --> 0:16:52.960 make a Dungeons and Dragons motion picture, and I'll get 0:16:52.960 --> 0:16:55.000 into some of those details when we talk about the director. 0:16:55.280 --> 0:16:57.160 I think they had to roll a twelve or above 0:16:57.200 --> 0:16:59.200 to achieve that goal, and they rolled a twelve. 0:16:59.520 --> 0:17:02.600 Yeah, yeah, at one point I think they rolled one 0:17:02.760 --> 0:17:04.679 and then they realized they did have inspiration and they 0:17:04.680 --> 0:17:07.280 were able to take that back nice. All right, let's 0:17:07.320 --> 0:17:09.360 listen to a little bit of the tray their audio here, 0:17:09.400 --> 0:17:11.880 and hopefully you'll get to hear Jeremy Irons a little 0:17:11.880 --> 0:17:12.680 bit in there as well. 0:17:13.560 --> 0:17:21.919 Yeah, in a faraway world, all people deserve to be 0:17:22.000 --> 0:17:25.520 free and equal. The child is not fit to govern 0:17:25.720 --> 0:17:28.320 an empire. The forces of darkness. 0:17:28.400 --> 0:17:32.080 You can control dragons for the Dyanami my command. 0:17:32.359 --> 0:17:33.480 I can crush the empress. 0:17:33.680 --> 0:17:35.760 This has gotta be some twisted magic experiment. 0:17:36.080 --> 0:17:39.560 Seriously wrong. I have threatened to conquer a kingdom. What 0:17:39.640 --> 0:17:41.119 can I do to stop profiance? 0:17:41.200 --> 0:17:44.080 If you can obtain a rod of Chevrial, you could 0:17:44.119 --> 0:17:45.560 control read dragons. 0:17:45.840 --> 0:17:47.800 I suggest we lay low. Let the whole thing blow 0:17:47.840 --> 0:17:52.200 of a come back rob everybody. There's one small problem problem. 0:17:52.400 --> 0:18:06.080 I kind of committed us to find it. Trust me that, 0:18:26.240 --> 0:18:28.240 oh it's your time to die. 0:18:32.119 --> 0:18:36.399 Dungeons and Dragons. You want to play video? 0:18:39.119 --> 0:18:43.880 All right? Now into Dragons against Us all right. If 0:18:43.920 --> 0:18:47.719 you want to watch Dungeons and Dragons for yourself, you 0:18:47.760 --> 0:18:51.800 can find this one in multiple formats, including some free 0:18:51.840 --> 0:18:55.919 streaming services. That's where I watched this film. You can 0:18:55.960 --> 0:18:57.840 find it on your your Plex and your two b's 0:18:58.080 --> 0:19:01.080 if those are options for you. There also there also 0:19:01.119 --> 0:19:03.840 have been different DVD and Blu Ray releases, including Dungeons 0:19:03.880 --> 0:19:06.560 and Dragons two Movie collection on Blu Ray. That's if 0:19:06.560 --> 0:19:09.600 you want to be clear, you're not getting the more 0:19:09.600 --> 0:19:12.800 recent Dungeons and Dragons adaptation in there. You're getting one 0:19:12.800 --> 0:19:16.720 of the crappy sequels to this film. So bye, with caution. 0:19:16.960 --> 0:19:19.880 Did any actors from this movie come back in that one? 0:19:20.200 --> 0:19:24.199 Bruce Payne just as Bruce Payne. He came back at 0:19:24.320 --> 0:19:27.000 least for the initial sequel. I don't know who if 0:19:27.000 --> 0:19:29.480 anyone came back for part three. I don't know if 0:19:29.480 --> 0:19:35.879 anyone seen Part three. 0:19:39.000 --> 0:19:41.520 All right, let's talk about the connections. 0:19:41.359 --> 0:19:42.919 All right. We're going to start at the top with 0:19:43.400 --> 0:19:49.440 director producer Courtney Solomon born nineteen seventy. So to be clear, 0:19:49.520 --> 0:19:52.760 there had been previous attempts to officially capitalize on D 0:19:52.800 --> 0:19:55.919 and D's popularity as a film going back to the 0:19:55.960 --> 0:20:01.200 early eighties, but nothing came together until around nineteen ninety, 0:20:01.720 --> 0:20:05.320 that is when then nineteen year old Courtney Solomon with 0:20:05.480 --> 0:20:09.080 basically only a passion for Dungeons and Dragons, some family 0:20:09.200 --> 0:20:12.479 background I think on his like on mother's side in 0:20:12.600 --> 0:20:16.119 Canadian TV production, and also we should we should, we 0:20:16.119 --> 0:20:19.280 should realize there's probably a natural twenty charisma role in here, 0:20:19.320 --> 0:20:22.560 because he managed to convince TSR, the parent company of 0:20:22.600 --> 0:20:24.720 D India at the time, to give him a shot 0:20:24.760 --> 0:20:25.880 at producing the thing. 0:20:26.280 --> 0:20:28.200 Had he made a movie at this point. 0:20:28.119 --> 0:20:31.400 No, he had not, as far as I can tell, No, 0:20:31.520 --> 0:20:34.480 nothing like that had occurred. So yeah, we may rag 0:20:34.600 --> 0:20:37.240 on this film a little bit in this episode, But man, 0:20:37.520 --> 0:20:40.760 that was roughly my age when this movie came out, 0:20:40.880 --> 0:20:44.119 and looking back at myself, I was barely capable of 0:20:44.160 --> 0:20:48.600 any level of adulting, you know. Solomon, however, at nineteen 0:20:49.160 --> 0:20:52.639 and in subsequent years won over TSR and then traveled 0:20:52.680 --> 0:20:56.560 around the world seeking financial backers and scored one in 0:20:56.640 --> 0:21:01.480 Hong Kong business magnate Alan Zamon and so by the 0:21:01.520 --> 0:21:05.600 mid nineties, the plan with Solomon as producer was to 0:21:05.640 --> 0:21:08.280 do this up as one hundred million dollar production with 0:21:08.359 --> 0:21:09.800 a big director. 0:21:10.240 --> 0:21:12.960 One hundred million dollars in the in the nineties. 0:21:13.320 --> 0:21:16.639 Yeah like that. I mean, you know, you're talking about 0:21:16.960 --> 0:21:19.639 Fellowship of the Ring range in terms of your budget. 0:21:19.640 --> 0:21:22.080 But of course that's you know, years later. So yeah, 0:21:22.520 --> 0:21:25.040 they were talking about having the likes of Francis Ford 0:21:25.080 --> 0:21:28.600 Coppola or James Cameron produced. I think Stan Winston was 0:21:28.640 --> 0:21:32.399 also attached at one point, but as often occurs in Hollywood, 0:21:32.920 --> 0:21:33.760 plans changed. 0:21:34.200 --> 0:21:36.639 Coming hot off of Pumpkinhead, I shall make the D 0:21:36.760 --> 0:21:37.480 and D movie. 0:21:38.480 --> 0:21:41.400 Wow, imagine what the effects would have looked like. Though 0:21:41.760 --> 0:21:43.480 you have gotten a good beholder in that one. 0:21:43.600 --> 0:21:48.280 I want to see that Francis Ford Coppola verse. Would 0:21:48.280 --> 0:21:50.639 it have had al Pacino in it? Oh? 0:21:50.760 --> 0:21:53.280 Yeah, Oh that would have been a different That would 0:21:53.280 --> 0:21:55.600 have been a different evil mage villain, wouldn't it. 0:21:55.840 --> 0:21:59.520 Oh, my lord? Imagine wizard, Yes, evil wizard al Pacino 0:22:00.240 --> 0:22:02.080 like he is in heat, you know with the. 0:22:03.840 --> 0:22:06.880 We joked, but I don't know, there's there. I can 0:22:07.000 --> 0:22:09.600 see a version of this film that would have worked 0:22:09.600 --> 0:22:11.400 with al Pacino, but I don't know, and we never 0:22:11.440 --> 0:22:15.840 got to have it, so plans changed. Hollywood producer Joel 0:22:15.840 --> 0:22:18.600 Silver came on board. There was talk at one point 0:22:18.640 --> 0:22:21.320 of doing it as a TV series instead. This is 0:22:21.359 --> 0:22:24.800 the natural one that I mentioned earlier. Then, No, I 0:22:24.800 --> 0:22:26.720 guess the natural one was when they were considering doing 0:22:26.720 --> 0:22:30.080 a low budget direct to video project, but they were 0:22:30.080 --> 0:22:32.159 able to push through and get things back up to 0:22:32.200 --> 0:22:34.760 a thirty to thirty five million dollar budget. And at 0:22:34.760 --> 0:22:37.240 this point it was clear Solomon himself was going to 0:22:37.280 --> 0:22:40.840 have to direct it again. This was his first directorial gig, 0:22:42.840 --> 0:22:44.400 but he did it. He pulled it off. 0:22:45.119 --> 0:22:48.000 It's like the artifact has attuned to you and you alone. 0:22:48.040 --> 0:22:49.560 You mess. You're the only one. 0:22:49.720 --> 0:22:51.639 You were the only one who can wield it. You 0:22:51.680 --> 0:22:56.120 were the chosen one, and so he did. Now as 0:22:56.119 --> 0:22:58.080 a director. He followed this up with two thousand and 0:22:58.080 --> 0:23:00.960 fives in American Haunting and twenty thirteen get Away, but 0:23:01.040 --> 0:23:03.800 it's mostly remained active as a producer on such films 0:23:03.800 --> 0:23:07.439 as two thousand and nine Universal Soldier Regeneration, twenty twelve's 0:23:07.560 --> 0:23:12.240 Universal Soldier, Day of Reckoning, twenty sixteen's Mister Church The 0:23:12.280 --> 0:23:15.120 Strangers Chapter one. From recent years, and I think there's 0:23:15.119 --> 0:23:17.159 some sequels on the way, and he's listed as a 0:23:17.160 --> 0:23:19.399 producer on an upcoming red Sonia film. 0:23:19.720 --> 0:23:22.360 Well, despite the criticisms I've already made, I do want 0:23:22.400 --> 0:23:25.359 to say this story makes it even more impressive that 0:23:25.440 --> 0:23:28.600 this film got made and is as fun as it is. 0:23:28.680 --> 0:23:31.800 I mean, it's bad, but you're not going to be bored, 0:23:31.880 --> 0:23:35.040 I think when you watch this movie. So yeah, hats 0:23:35.040 --> 0:23:37.359 off to Courtney Solomon, and I do want to echo 0:23:37.400 --> 0:23:39.520 what you said earlier. We may rag on this film, 0:23:39.520 --> 0:23:40.600 but we rag with love. 0:23:40.920 --> 0:23:43.320 Yeah. Yeah, We've said before it's a miracle that any 0:23:43.320 --> 0:23:47.840 film gets finished. And kudos to him for bringing this 0:23:47.880 --> 0:23:51.040 one home. Now the writing credits, there are two credited 0:23:51.040 --> 0:23:58.680 writers topper, Lillian and Carol Cartwright. Lillian screenwriter and director 0:23:58.720 --> 0:24:00.320 who also had a small part in the in the 0:24:00.320 --> 0:24:05.639 Conehead movie nineteen ninety three's Coneheads, and then Carol Cartwright 0:24:06.400 --> 0:24:08.719 was also one of the writers on twenty twenty two's 0:24:08.840 --> 0:24:12.040 Missus Harris Goes to Paris, which was well received and 0:24:12.119 --> 0:24:15.360 even earned her and her co writers an Australian Writers 0:24:15.359 --> 0:24:15.960 Guild Award. 0:24:16.320 --> 0:24:19.600 Oh cool. As for the Coneheads connection, I don't know 0:24:19.640 --> 0:24:21.600 how I knew, but I felt a little bit of 0:24:21.600 --> 0:24:22.800 Conehead's juice on this. 0:24:23.800 --> 0:24:25.879 Like, I don't think they were involved with writing it 0:24:25.920 --> 0:24:28.679 at all, but they showed They're credited as showing up 0:24:28.720 --> 0:24:30.240 as one of the pilots in the code, and it 0:24:30.240 --> 0:24:32.800 could be an IMDb error, but I'm going to assume 0:24:32.840 --> 0:24:33.240 it's real. 0:24:34.160 --> 0:24:36.879 Now, I think we're about to start discussing the cast 0:24:37.040 --> 0:24:39.199 and the characters. I mentioned at the top of that 0:24:39.680 --> 0:24:42.439 D and D the game has character classes in it 0:24:42.520 --> 0:24:45.320 so you can cheer. You know, your rogues, your rangers, 0:24:45.400 --> 0:24:48.600 your your clerics, and so forth. Should we take a 0:24:48.640 --> 0:24:52.080 stab at saying what actual D and D class the 0:24:52.160 --> 0:24:54.920 characters in this movie are supposed to be? If anything? 0:24:55.640 --> 0:25:00.919 Yeah, yeah, we should beginning with our chief antaganist. This 0:25:01.080 --> 0:25:05.040 is a profion, a high level mage, I would assume, now. 0:25:05.000 --> 0:25:06.680 Rob, you know the D and D lore better than 0:25:06.680 --> 0:25:09.760 I do. But the way I sort of understand it 0:25:09.800 --> 0:25:12.480 is that your main magic users in D and D 0:25:12.760 --> 0:25:17.160 are your sorcerers, your warlocks, and your wizards. The wizard 0:25:17.240 --> 0:25:20.600 is sort of the intellectual magician who learns their powers 0:25:20.600 --> 0:25:25.199 through study. The warlock is the sort of bound to 0:25:25.280 --> 0:25:28.480 a demonic entity magician who gains their powers through through 0:25:28.520 --> 0:25:31.840 this relationship with you know, something that grants the power. 0:25:32.280 --> 0:25:35.080 And then finally your sorcerer sort of has magic in 0:25:35.119 --> 0:25:37.480 their blood. They you know, they like come from a 0:25:37.520 --> 0:25:40.960 magical background and they do it on instinct. It's kind 0:25:40.960 --> 0:25:43.320 of hard to fit Jeremy Iron's character in this movie 0:25:43.320 --> 0:25:46.080 into any of the three. You would he fits the 0:25:46.280 --> 0:25:49.200 esthetic of a warlock the most, but they never mention 0:25:49.400 --> 0:25:52.240 anything about a patron. So I'm gonna say, even though 0:25:52.280 --> 0:25:54.400 he feels more warlocky, he's got to be. 0:25:54.320 --> 0:25:58.800 A wizard, right, Yeah, Yeah, I think he's definitely a wizard. Yeah, 0:25:59.160 --> 0:26:01.520 he is the puppet man as opposed to the puppet 0:26:01.600 --> 0:26:03.720 or the conduit as you would have in those other 0:26:03.720 --> 0:26:07.879 two classes. Okay, that being said, no beard, and not 0:26:08.000 --> 0:26:10.640 that a wizard has to have a beard. But again, 0:26:10.840 --> 0:26:14.360 at the time this bothered me. So Jeremy Irons born 0:26:14.440 --> 0:26:16.879 nineteen forty eight. This is I believe our first Jeremy 0:26:16.880 --> 0:26:21.840 Irons film. I've read that he joined the film during 0:26:21.840 --> 0:26:25.640 its filming at the behest of Joel Silver and, according 0:26:25.680 --> 0:26:27.359 to Irons, out of a need to help pay for 0:26:27.400 --> 0:26:28.840 a castle he had just purchased. 0:26:29.080 --> 0:26:33.439 Amazing it reminds me of that A quote from Michael 0:26:33.480 --> 0:26:36.359 Caine about Jaws the Revenge. As somebody asked him about it, 0:26:36.440 --> 0:26:38.160 he says, I haven't seen the film. I've heard it's 0:26:38.240 --> 0:26:40.320 quite terrible, but I have seen the house it built 0:26:40.359 --> 0:26:41.040 and it's lovely. 0:26:41.440 --> 0:26:45.479 Yeah. So Irons has a long and ongoing career on 0:26:45.520 --> 0:26:47.920 the stage, TV and the big screen, with credits going 0:26:47.960 --> 0:26:51.680 back to nineteen seventy one. He really began to skyrocket 0:26:51.720 --> 0:26:55.080 with TV's Brides Had Revisited in eighty one, which earned 0:26:55.119 --> 0:26:58.560 him numerous nominations, and his nineteen eighty six was pretty stellar, 0:26:58.640 --> 0:27:02.600 seeing him play Twin Gynecologist and David Cronenberg's Dead Ringers 0:27:03.720 --> 0:27:08.280 and also Father Gabriel and Roland Jeffy's masterpiece The Mission, 0:27:08.880 --> 0:27:10.679 and he then went on to win the Academy Award 0:27:10.680 --> 0:27:13.000 for Best Actor for his portrayal of Klos von Buloh 0:27:13.280 --> 0:27:16.879 in Reversal of Fortune opposite Glenn Close and Ron Silver. 0:27:17.480 --> 0:27:22.440 Subsequent notable credits include David Cronenberg's m Butterfly from ninety three, 0:27:22.920 --> 0:27:25.359 The Lion King from ninety four, in which he voiced 0:27:25.400 --> 0:27:29.520 Scar Now that's also a very juicy voice role. 0:27:29.760 --> 0:27:31.639 And also I think the way that a lot of 0:27:31.800 --> 0:27:35.800 kids come to learn who Jeremy Irons is. Yeah. You know, 0:27:35.840 --> 0:27:38.320 when I was like, I grew up watching The Lion King, 0:27:38.359 --> 0:27:40.920 and then when I was older and like learning about movies, 0:27:41.320 --> 0:27:44.000 I was like, why is this weird guy? His voice 0:27:44.040 --> 0:27:46.960 is so familiar. Oh it's Scar Oh okay, And so 0:27:47.040 --> 0:27:48.399 you make the connection that way. 0:27:48.840 --> 0:27:52.200 Yeah, Long Live the King, I'll say always back in 0:27:52.280 --> 0:27:54.639 ninety five with Diehard with a Vengeance, plays the villain 0:27:54.680 --> 0:27:57.440 in that. He's in two thousand and two is the 0:27:57.480 --> 0:28:01.399 time Machine, playing like a super intelligent more. He's in 0:28:01.400 --> 0:28:03.840 two thousand and five's Kingdom of Heaven from Ridley Scott. 0:28:03.880 --> 0:28:06.200 Two thousand and eight's The Color of Magic, that's a 0:28:06.320 --> 0:28:13.160 Terry Pratchett adaptation, TV's The Borgias, the Snyder DCU Batman films, 0:28:13.760 --> 0:28:15.679 TV's The Watchman. He's quite good in that. 0:28:15.840 --> 0:28:16.320 And then. 0:28:17.760 --> 0:28:20.520 Yeah, yeah, and then twenty twenty one's House of Gucci, 0:28:20.760 --> 0:28:23.280 which I haven't seen, but of course that was a 0:28:23.280 --> 0:28:24.560 lot of people like that as well. 0:28:25.000 --> 0:28:27.800 So of course, Jeremy Irons is a terrific actor, and 0:28:27.920 --> 0:28:30.560 I love him in so many roles. One that stands 0:28:30.560 --> 0:28:32.919 out to me is a kind of one of his 0:28:33.080 --> 0:28:36.400 unsung roles, but is really good. He plays a nasty 0:28:37.400 --> 0:28:40.200 financial CEO in the movie Margin Call. 0:28:40.200 --> 0:28:41.600 I don't know if you've seen Oh, I haven't seen 0:28:41.640 --> 0:28:41.960 that one. 0:28:42.120 --> 0:28:44.960 Yeah, he does in that A character that he often 0:28:45.000 --> 0:28:49.160 does very well, which is a deeply morally compromised and 0:28:49.280 --> 0:28:51.320 scummy but quite charismatic man. 0:28:52.040 --> 0:28:56.240 Yes, scummy charismatic aristocrat is a role that he plays 0:28:56.360 --> 0:29:00.440 very well. And I would say his performances there's often 0:29:00.520 --> 0:29:03.880 a kind of quiet subtlety to them, like he gets 0:29:03.880 --> 0:29:05.960 into higher energy zones. I don't want to, you know, 0:29:05.960 --> 0:29:09.240 make it sound like he's just, you know, like just 0:29:09.400 --> 0:29:11.800 a certain energy level for the rest of his performances, 0:29:12.200 --> 0:29:18.160 but it's generally not high energy and not like this film. 0:29:18.520 --> 0:29:19.160 I don't know if. 0:29:19.120 --> 0:29:22.840 I've ever thought to describe a movie performance this way before. 0:29:22.880 --> 0:29:26.360 But what I realized is Jeremy Irons came into this 0:29:26.400 --> 0:29:29.440 film with the idea, what if I were to approach 0:29:29.520 --> 0:29:34.640 acting with the goal of maximizing not quality, but quantity. 0:29:35.360 --> 0:29:39.480 So is this good acting from Jeremy Irons? I honestly 0:29:39.520 --> 0:29:41.760 don't even know how to answer that, But what I'm 0:29:41.800 --> 0:29:45.920 sure of is you cannot complain about the portions of acting. 0:29:46.280 --> 0:29:49.080 You will be taking leftovers home from from D and 0:29:49.160 --> 0:29:52.560 D like his His performance will leave you full and 0:29:53.200 --> 0:29:55.120 you cannot consume it all. Yeah. 0:29:55.240 --> 0:29:58.400 If a normal Jeremy Irons performance is like a subtle knife, 0:29:58.560 --> 0:30:01.600 this one is a chainsaw. He's on full blast the 0:30:01.640 --> 0:30:06.160 whole time. It's glorious to behold. He's snarling, his skull 0:30:06.240 --> 0:30:10.440 is about to pop through his face. His presence absolutely 0:30:10.440 --> 0:30:13.760 makes this film more watchable than it would have been otherwise, 0:30:14.480 --> 0:30:17.000 and so I think the energy level is absolutely the 0:30:17.080 --> 0:30:19.920 right choice for this film. I honestly don't know if 0:30:19.920 --> 0:30:21.920 this was Jeremy Iron's choice, or if this was the 0:30:22.200 --> 0:30:27.160 director's choice or some compromise between the two, but I 0:30:27.160 --> 0:30:28.840 cannot imagine this film without it. 0:30:28.960 --> 0:30:32.280 We shall have to modify our plans. 0:30:33.320 --> 0:30:37.560 Just chewing it up now, I'm not sure his performance 0:30:37.600 --> 0:30:42.400 really lifts everyone around him up in equal measure, which 0:30:42.440 --> 0:30:45.080 is something you sometimes see when you have a high 0:30:45.080 --> 0:30:49.280 caliber actor working with younger and less experienced talent. But 0:30:49.400 --> 0:30:51.720 I also have to acknowledge that maybe this film was 0:30:51.760 --> 0:30:54.720 not exactly the sort of workshop environment for that sort 0:30:54.720 --> 0:30:55.040 of thing. 0:30:55.920 --> 0:30:58.640 Yeah. I don't mean this as a slight against the 0:30:58.640 --> 0:31:01.120 great Jeremy Irons, but I would say a lot of 0:31:01.120 --> 0:31:04.720 his scenes they don't feel very collaborative. They feel more 0:31:04.760 --> 0:31:07.920 like he is a mad bull that has been unleashed 0:31:07.960 --> 0:31:11.720 on the set and they've started filming. Yeah, and everybody 0:31:11.720 --> 0:31:13.400 else is just kind of they've got to kind of 0:31:13.400 --> 0:31:14.720 deal with it. Yeah. 0:31:15.240 --> 0:31:18.160 Yeah, that's very much the vibe I get here too. Now, 0:31:18.200 --> 0:31:23.840 behind every mad villain there is a henchman, and the 0:31:23.920 --> 0:31:27.800 hinching here is provided by Bruce Payne, who plays Damadar, 0:31:28.360 --> 0:31:31.240 who I guess he's a sword made. I think the 0:31:31.320 --> 0:31:35.040 exact terminology changes from one edition of D and D 0:31:35.200 --> 0:31:38.200 to the next, but it's like a wizard, a magic 0:31:38.280 --> 0:31:41.479 user who also swings a sword around, which I mean, 0:31:41.520 --> 0:31:43.840 it's definitely in the rules, but it always feels to 0:31:43.920 --> 0:31:46.080 me like, come on, dude, you can choose to be 0:31:46.480 --> 0:31:48.680 a fighter or a wizard. Why do you have to 0:31:48.680 --> 0:31:51.320 try and be both? Share the love with the table. 0:31:52.600 --> 0:31:55.600 Yeah exactly. Yeah. I was trying to place him as 0:31:55.600 --> 0:31:59.240 well as having trouble. He's got big he's got big 0:31:59.280 --> 0:32:02.040 scary arm. Okay, so, and he's got a big sword, 0:32:02.080 --> 0:32:03.760 and that does seem to place him in the kind 0:32:03.760 --> 0:32:07.680 of physical fighter class, but he's also peripheral to a 0:32:07.720 --> 0:32:09.800 bunch of dark magic yeah. 0:32:09.560 --> 0:32:11.680 And when he shows up at one point, Richard O'Brien's 0:32:11.720 --> 0:32:13.240 character is like, get that mage out of here. No 0:32:13.320 --> 0:32:15.720 mage is allowed, so I guess he's a mage. 0:32:16.160 --> 0:32:18.720 But also that goes on something in the movie where 0:32:19.120 --> 0:32:22.040 it treats mage not as a character class in the game, 0:32:22.080 --> 0:32:25.920 but as an economic class. Like in the world of 0:32:26.200 --> 0:32:29.320 this D and D movie, if you are a mage, 0:32:29.400 --> 0:32:31.840 that means you're rich. Right. 0:32:31.960 --> 0:32:35.120 The Mages control everything, as we'll get into. But then 0:32:35.120 --> 0:32:38.280 this dude's like walking through portals, and granted, magical portals 0:32:38.280 --> 0:32:41.440 are really thrown around in this movie with reckless abandons, 0:32:41.640 --> 0:32:44.600 but I'm not entirely sure who's casting them. Is Damadar 0:32:44.720 --> 0:32:47.959 casting them or does he have like a travel wizard 0:32:47.960 --> 0:32:48.840 with him at all times? 0:32:48.920 --> 0:32:51.680 It's like they can cast misty step without being able 0:32:51.720 --> 0:32:52.680 to see where they're going. 0:32:53.120 --> 0:32:57.120 Yeah. But Bruce Payne, Yes, we've talked about Bruce Payne 0:32:57.120 --> 0:33:00.320 on the show before. Born nineteen fifty eight, British actors agent. 0:33:00.400 --> 0:33:05.160 Screen he was in Alan Clark's snooker musical Billy the 0:33:05.280 --> 0:33:09.480 Kid and the Green Bays Vampire, a glorious film and 0:33:09.800 --> 0:33:13.320 a fine supporting and singing performance by Pain as the 0:33:13.320 --> 0:33:17.959 one Akato. He's great in that, and I'm to understand 0:33:18.000 --> 0:33:20.840 he's also really good in nineteen eighty six's Absolute Beginners. 0:33:21.560 --> 0:33:24.960 But man, the nineteen nineties Bruce Payne that I think 0:33:25.000 --> 0:33:28.400 most of us are familiar with are it's this Bruce Payne. 0:33:28.560 --> 0:33:32.720 It's like looming British villain Bruce Payne, like he really 0:33:33.440 --> 0:33:37.280 found his niche, his paying niche in the nineteen nineties. 0:33:38.000 --> 0:33:40.520 Numerous films we can reference here in which he's playing 0:33:40.920 --> 0:33:42.480 some variation of this bad guy. 0:33:42.920 --> 0:33:45.960 Sometimes feels in this movie like he's trying to match 0:33:46.120 --> 0:33:49.520 or compete with Jeremy Irons, like they were literally like betting, 0:33:49.560 --> 0:33:55.080 which one could overact more just stunningly inappropriate line deliveries 0:33:55.200 --> 0:33:59.000 taking four or five times longer than necessary to spit 0:33:59.080 --> 0:34:05.440 out function very functional lines like placecards at every gate. 0:34:07.440 --> 0:34:12.000 Yeah, exactly, like really drawn out. And the look of 0:34:12.040 --> 0:34:15.560 this character too, we have to I mean, you mentioned 0:34:15.560 --> 0:34:17.640 the armor he has. He has some cool looking armor, 0:34:17.960 --> 0:34:22.880 you know, neat cape, big sword, but he also has bright. 0:34:22.520 --> 0:34:25.360 Blue lips electric blue. 0:34:26.000 --> 0:34:29.279 Yeah, like like he just had some sort of like 0:34:29.560 --> 0:34:32.920 really bright slushie or something or that. It is like 0:34:33.000 --> 0:34:36.239 just really bright blue lipstick that I kept expecting it 0:34:36.280 --> 0:34:38.560 to be explained one way or another or another, like 0:34:38.560 --> 0:34:41.440 there's some sort of like mentat wine that he drinks. 0:34:41.719 --> 0:34:43.680 But I don't think they ever really make any sense 0:34:43.680 --> 0:34:46.560 of it. It's just a bizarre visual choice. 0:34:46.719 --> 0:34:50.120 He's one of those bald guys with blue lips. Yeah, 0:34:50.160 --> 0:34:52.560 And then later part of What's in this World? 0:34:52.800 --> 0:34:56.560 And later as he's infected by a bizarre CGI brain parasite, 0:34:57.200 --> 0:35:02.080 he also begins to boast increase only inflamed ears. So 0:35:02.360 --> 0:35:04.279 most of the scenes you end up with hav him 0:35:04.360 --> 0:35:07.640 like close in on his head, bright blue lips, big 0:35:07.680 --> 0:35:09.839 red ears. It's ridiculous. 0:35:10.000 --> 0:35:11.719 Yeah, the ears look painful. 0:35:12.040 --> 0:35:14.960 Yeah, but he manages to push through all this and 0:35:15.000 --> 0:35:18.160 make you believe in the character's cardboard villainy. You know, 0:35:18.280 --> 0:35:21.920 he's a cardboard villain, very much a henchman. But you 0:35:21.960 --> 0:35:24.879 know he does a commendable job here. 0:35:25.320 --> 0:35:28.560 He gets to do the classic you know, the hero says, hey, 0:35:28.640 --> 0:35:30.799 you said if I gave you the artifact, you'd free 0:35:30.840 --> 0:35:32.680 my friends. What does he get to say? 0:35:33.080 --> 0:35:34.160 I lie? 0:35:36.960 --> 0:35:37.160 Now. 0:35:37.480 --> 0:35:40.359 Other Bruce Payne performances the nineteen nineties that I think 0:35:40.440 --> 0:35:44.239 cemented his place as a go to villain. He does 0:35:44.280 --> 0:35:47.280 have a role in nineteen ninety one's Howling the Freaks, 0:35:47.640 --> 0:35:51.399 in which he plays a hideous dart Nosferatu character under 0:35:51.440 --> 0:35:53.160 a lot of makeup. I don't know if I would 0:35:53.160 --> 0:35:56.359 have ever recognized this as Bruce Payne. But then, more 0:35:56.400 --> 0:35:58.360 to the point, he was in nineteen ninety two's Passing 0:35:58.360 --> 0:36:01.560 Your fifty seven, in which he plays the villain opposite 0:36:01.640 --> 0:36:05.040 Wesley Snipes. His subsequent credits included the likes of ninety 0:36:05.040 --> 0:36:08.320 three's Necronomicon Book of the Dead, Tales from the Crypt 0:36:08.719 --> 0:36:11.879 Warlock three, the End of Innocence, taking over the part 0:36:11.880 --> 0:36:16.440 from Julian Sand's Highlander Endgame in two thousand and the 0:36:16.440 --> 0:36:18.520 two thousand and five D and D sequel that we 0:36:18.560 --> 0:36:20.560 referenced earlier, in which he was I believe the only 0:36:20.600 --> 0:36:21.600 cast member returning. 0:36:22.040 --> 0:36:22.880 Good to stay busy. 0:36:23.239 --> 0:36:34.400 Yes, all right, so those are our chief antagonist and 0:36:34.440 --> 0:36:37.320 the henchmen. Let's get into the actual adventuring. 0:36:36.880 --> 0:36:38.440 Party here, Yeah, our heroes. 0:36:39.440 --> 0:36:42.840 So this is one of those encounters where the dungeon 0:36:42.880 --> 0:36:46.880 master didn't really tell everyone that they needed certain roles. 0:36:47.440 --> 0:36:49.840 He didn't explain that somebody needs to be the cleric 0:36:50.000 --> 0:36:52.080 because there's no cleric in the party. Now, in fact, 0:36:52.120 --> 0:36:53.080 you have two rogues. 0:36:53.280 --> 0:36:56.799 Two rogues. Our main two characters are both rogues. That 0:36:56.960 --> 0:36:58.000 is imbalanced. 0:36:59.040 --> 0:37:02.600 Imbalanced though I don't know. Anytime i'm dungeon mastering, I'm like, 0:37:02.960 --> 0:37:04.880 just play what you want to play. If we're all rogues, 0:37:04.880 --> 0:37:08.280 we'll roll with it, We'll find a way. But in general, 0:37:08.400 --> 0:37:12.040 you're supposed to sort of steer everyone towards a balanced party. 0:37:12.480 --> 0:37:17.880 So I guess our main rogue here, ultimately our lead character, 0:37:17.920 --> 0:37:22.560 our protagonist is Ridley Freeborn, a generic rogue, I guess, 0:37:22.600 --> 0:37:23.880 played by Justin Whalin. 0:37:24.239 --> 0:37:31.000 My name is Maximus protagonist. Oh boy, Yeah, he's got 0:37:31.040 --> 0:37:35.719 such like hero kid energy in this Yeah. 0:37:35.960 --> 0:37:38.160 Yeah. All of his scenes feel like they were directed 0:37:38.160 --> 0:37:42.120 by uncle baby Billy, you know, like major tings energy. Here. 0:37:43.160 --> 0:37:46.520 It's not a character that I ever found myself liking 0:37:46.760 --> 0:37:50.360 or rooting for. Not that it's the actor's fault, but 0:37:50.440 --> 0:37:53.520 it's just like, this is our hero. I don't know. 0:37:53.960 --> 0:37:56.239 Boy, you didn't like the Dark Knight of the Soul 0:37:56.360 --> 0:37:58.719 scene in the late movie when he's like, why are 0:37:59.000 --> 0:38:00.600 bad things bad? 0:38:02.800 --> 0:38:03.520 Yeah? 0:38:03.800 --> 0:38:07.279 Well why do we have to fight evil? Yeah? 0:38:07.320 --> 0:38:09.440 At that point I was more like, get on with it. 0:38:09.640 --> 0:38:11.480 Just at the scene where you fight the evil. Obviously 0:38:11.520 --> 0:38:12.759 you're going to fight the evil, dude. 0:38:12.760 --> 0:38:13.040 Come on. 0:38:14.320 --> 0:38:18.480 So this actor American actor who previously worked as a 0:38:18.560 --> 0:38:21.239 child actor on such films as nineteen eighty eight's The Deadpool, 0:38:21.600 --> 0:38:25.280 nineteen ninety one's Child's Play three, and various TV shows 0:38:25.320 --> 0:38:27.960 including The Wonder Years and Blossom. And he was active 0:38:28.000 --> 0:38:30.160 through I believe around two thousand and nine when he 0:38:30.440 --> 0:38:31.240 retired from acting. 0:38:31.480 --> 0:38:34.200 Okay, but as we said, it's it's not just one 0:38:34.320 --> 0:38:36.960 rogue in the lead. It's a buddy rogue movie. Yes, 0:38:37.400 --> 0:38:40.000 so we got the other one, played by Marlon Wayans. 0:38:40.760 --> 0:38:45.680 Yes, Marlon Wayans of the Wayans Brothers plays Snails. Snails 0:38:45.920 --> 0:38:49.960 is another generic rogue. I believe he uses the comedic 0:38:50.080 --> 0:38:54.800 sidekick specialization within the rogue archetype. 0:38:54.280 --> 0:38:56.600 Here arcane prankster. 0:38:57.960 --> 0:38:59.600 Essentially, but no magic. 0:38:59.680 --> 0:39:01.120 Yeah yeah. 0:39:01.400 --> 0:39:06.480 So. Born nineteen seventy two, Wayan's brother actor, writer, and 0:39:06.560 --> 0:39:10.600 comedian who's best known for wildly over the top comedic 0:39:10.600 --> 0:39:14.279 performances in such films as The Scary Movie Franchise, which 0:39:14.280 --> 0:39:16.920 he also co wrote and co produced, two thousand and 0:39:16.920 --> 0:39:19.880 four's White Chicks and two thousand and six Little Man 0:39:20.600 --> 0:39:22.160 and I haven't seen this one, but this is the 0:39:22.160 --> 0:39:25.640 one where he plays like a cgi face assisted baby, 0:39:25.719 --> 0:39:29.000 like it's Marlon Wayan's face on a baby. Oh no, 0:39:29.920 --> 0:39:32.960 so I mean it's what put him on the map, 0:39:33.040 --> 0:39:36.880 and people enjoyed these films that made him a success, 0:39:38.160 --> 0:39:40.400 And that is mostly the vibe we get in D 0:39:40.480 --> 0:39:43.640 and D. He is the comedic relief. He has won 0:39:44.040 --> 0:39:46.920 maybe two scenes but most likely one scene in this 0:39:47.000 --> 0:39:50.239 movie where he mostly plays it straight, but for the 0:39:50.280 --> 0:39:52.560 most part it's full scary movie mode for the rest 0:39:52.560 --> 0:39:53.120 of the picture. 0:39:53.360 --> 0:39:57.600 Yes, he's doing comedy, physical comedy, and character comedy for 0:39:57.719 --> 0:40:00.600 most of the film, which makes it rather jarring. In 0:40:00.680 --> 0:40:03.719 the scene where he gets murdered by the villain, which 0:40:03.800 --> 0:40:08.279 is suddenly very serious, and all his friends are like, no, dead, 0:40:08.840 --> 0:40:11.919 and I kept thinking, well, surely he can't really be dead. 0:40:12.000 --> 0:40:15.759 That would be so totally weird, especially given how just 0:40:16.000 --> 0:40:18.960 he's like joking all the time. But no, he's just dead. 0:40:19.280 --> 0:40:20.239 They just killed him. 0:40:20.560 --> 0:40:24.160 He pulls such faces in scenes where he's not even 0:40:24.200 --> 0:40:28.000 talking that reminded me of some of the supporting performances 0:40:28.080 --> 0:40:32.440 by this particular vaudevillian actor in Santa Claus Versus the Martians, 0:40:32.480 --> 0:40:35.440 Like it's that level of just over the top intensity. 0:40:35.719 --> 0:40:36.040 Yes. 0:40:37.960 --> 0:40:40.640 But the crazy thing for me though, was I was like, 0:40:40.719 --> 0:40:42.880 I was looking at his filmography and I realized, you know, 0:40:42.960 --> 0:40:46.120 the year two thousand, that's also the year that Marlon 0:40:46.200 --> 0:40:50.240 Wayans appeared and was widely considered a really solid, serious, 0:40:50.280 --> 0:40:53.360 dramatic performance from him. And that's Darren Aronofsky's Requiem for 0:40:53.400 --> 0:40:53.800 a Dream. 0:40:53.960 --> 0:40:56.680 Oh yeah, I had forgotten he was in that, but yeah, 0:40:56.680 --> 0:40:59.879 he's great in that. This is around the same time. Unbelievable. 0:41:00.239 --> 0:41:02.920 Yeah, so, I mean, you know, the man has and 0:41:03.000 --> 0:41:06.879 had the tools. But I mean, obviously there's a lot 0:41:06.920 --> 0:41:11.800 more money to be made in the comedy business. But yeah, 0:41:11.920 --> 0:41:15.520 that's snails. More on snails than in a bit, all right. 0:41:15.560 --> 0:41:19.000 The next character, I think is obviously an NPC. I 0:41:19.040 --> 0:41:22.239 don't think she has any marketable skills other than she 0:41:22.440 --> 0:41:26.280 is the Empress. The Empress Savina played by Thora Birch. 0:41:27.239 --> 0:41:29.319 Now we're gonna we're making a habit of having to 0:41:29.360 --> 0:41:31.560 say this as we talk about every actor playing a 0:41:31.600 --> 0:41:33.960 good character in this movie. But no offense to the 0:41:34.520 --> 0:41:37.359 actor here, no offense to Thora Birch. But there, Yeah, 0:41:37.360 --> 0:41:39.560 there is not much going on with this character. 0:41:40.000 --> 0:41:42.680 Yeah, I think they were maybe going for a childlike 0:41:42.719 --> 0:41:45.600 empress vibe here, you know, from the never ending story, 0:41:45.640 --> 0:41:48.520 Except what if we weighed her down with like two 0:41:48.560 --> 0:41:52.480 tons of chain mail, because she just ends up looking 0:41:52.640 --> 0:41:54.919 uncomfortable in most of these scenes. 0:41:54.880 --> 0:41:58.400 Well, but also force her to make speeches like engage 0:41:58.400 --> 0:42:03.200 in political rhetoric. The childlike Empress does not do that, right. 0:42:04.040 --> 0:42:06.920 So, born in nineteen eighty two, she kicked things off 0:42:06.920 --> 0:42:08.840 as a child actor, and at this point had already 0:42:08.840 --> 0:42:11.600 appeared in such films as nineteen ninety two's Patriot Games, 0:42:12.000 --> 0:42:14.560 ninety three's hocus Pocus ninety four is clear and present 0:42:14.640 --> 0:42:18.480 danger and very important one episode of the nineteen nineties 0:42:18.520 --> 0:42:22.520 Outer Limits. But this film is also sandwich between two 0:42:22.560 --> 0:42:25.640 of her most critically acclaimed films. I believe when they 0:42:25.719 --> 0:42:29.719 filmed Dungeons and Dragons, they'd already shot nineteen ninety nine's 0:42:29.719 --> 0:42:33.520 American Beauty, but then it comes out before D and 0:42:33.560 --> 0:42:36.680 D comes out, obviously, and then after American Beauty came out, 0:42:36.760 --> 0:42:39.160 of course, she received a lot of acclaim for that performance, 0:42:39.160 --> 0:42:40.960 and then she would go on to have a really 0:42:40.960 --> 0:42:44.120 solid performance in two thousand and one's Ghost World, opposite 0:42:44.160 --> 0:42:47.680 Scarlett Johansson and Steve Usimmi. It's been a long time 0:42:47.719 --> 0:42:50.359 since I've seen either of those films, but I do 0:42:50.400 --> 0:42:52.719 remember her as being rather good in Ghost World. 0:42:53.960 --> 0:42:55.919 Yeah, I don't think I've seen either of those since 0:42:55.960 --> 0:42:59.880 the early two thousands. But yeah, same like thor Birch, 0:43:00.400 --> 0:43:03.239 I like with much of the cast, I would be 0:43:03.320 --> 0:43:06.959 curious to hear her thoughts and what she remembers about 0:43:07.000 --> 0:43:07.840 making this film. 0:43:08.400 --> 0:43:13.719 Yeah, because yeah, I you know, again, solid actress, but 0:43:13.920 --> 0:43:18.960 this is not the picture. All right, let's move back 0:43:18.960 --> 0:43:24.200 to the actual adventuring party. We also have Marina Pretensa. 0:43:25.239 --> 0:43:27.400 She is a human mage and she was played by 0:43:27.520 --> 0:43:32.239 Zoe mcleland born nineteen seventy four, American TV actress, best 0:43:32.280 --> 0:43:34.080 known for this film. I think, and I have to say, 0:43:34.440 --> 0:43:36.080 I thought she was actually pretty good in this role. 0:43:36.160 --> 0:43:39.920 Despite the flat misogyny gags that were kind of shoehorned 0:43:39.920 --> 0:43:44.279 in there, I don't know, she was more alive, Her 0:43:44.360 --> 0:43:47.960 character felt more alive, and her performance therefore followed in 0:43:48.000 --> 0:43:49.320 ways that other characters did not. 0:43:50.040 --> 0:43:53.560 Yeah, yeah, yeah, Well, another example of not a great, 0:43:54.080 --> 0:43:56.560 not a wonderfully written role, but she's doing what she 0:43:56.600 --> 0:43:57.080 can with it. 0:43:57.239 --> 0:44:01.080 Yeah, she appeared on such TV shows star Trek Voyager, 0:44:01.160 --> 0:44:04.320 and I think she was main cast on Designated Survivor. 0:44:04.760 --> 0:44:08.520 All right, Next up, we have el Wood Gutworthy. He 0:44:08.640 --> 0:44:12.160 is a dwarven fighter and he is played by Lee 0:44:12.480 --> 0:44:18.840 Arenberg born nineteen sixty two, possibly under celebrated American character actor. 0:44:19.080 --> 0:44:21.480 You might not know his name, but you'll instantly recognize 0:44:21.560 --> 0:44:24.560 him from such projects as the Pirates of the Caribbean movies, 0:44:25.000 --> 0:44:28.560 which he played. His character's name is pinel Pinel. 0:44:28.880 --> 0:44:31.640 See one of the two sort of comedy pirates, the 0:44:31.760 --> 0:44:33.120 bad guy comedy Pirates. 0:44:33.320 --> 0:44:36.000 Yeah, he's the bald one, the bald bearded comedy pirate. 0:44:37.000 --> 0:44:40.560 He also has appeared on TV shows like Friends and Seinfeld. 0:44:41.120 --> 0:44:43.200 But I think the first place I saw him was 0:44:43.239 --> 0:44:46.480 a nineteen ninety Tales from the Crypt episode titled for 0:44:46.600 --> 0:44:51.560 Crying Out Loud, which co starred Katie Segal, Iggy Pop 0:44:51.640 --> 0:44:54.919 and Sam Kennison as the voice in Arenberg's head. 0:44:55.239 --> 0:44:58.880 Sam Kennison as the voice in his head. Yes. Wow. 0:44:59.360 --> 0:45:02.160 He also played the Eternal Flame in the nineteen ninety 0:45:02.160 --> 0:45:07.000 three cinematic Marvel Freaked, and you'll also find him in 0:45:07.040 --> 0:45:09.399 some other bits as well, like he plays a hold 0:45:09.480 --> 0:45:10.880 up man in RoboCop three. 0:45:12.120 --> 0:45:14.000 As for his role in this movie, I mean, I 0:45:14.040 --> 0:45:17.480 hope you like seeing food in people's beards. That's a 0:45:17.960 --> 0:45:21.120 yuck yuck. You know they're gonna go for that joke 0:45:21.239 --> 0:45:25.440 many times, and you will actually be quite impressed how 0:45:25.600 --> 0:45:27.560 much food they can fit in his beard. 0:45:28.120 --> 0:45:31.000 Yeah, they just kept saying it's not funny enough. Let's 0:45:31.040 --> 0:45:32.640 add more chicken wings to the gag. 0:45:32.880 --> 0:45:35.560 More chicken. Yeah. Yeah, you know. 0:45:35.680 --> 0:45:38.480 I remember being a little grumpy about the dwarf as 0:45:38.520 --> 0:45:42.560 comic relief elements in Jackson's Lord of the Rings. But 0:45:43.280 --> 0:45:46.080 gut worthy here is ten thousand times worse than any 0:45:46.080 --> 0:45:49.040 of that. Like, this film's vision for a dwarf is 0:45:49.080 --> 0:45:52.160 that of a kind of drunken, bearded umpa lumpa whose 0:45:52.200 --> 0:45:55.920 main character traits are alcoholism, gluttony, and poor hygiene. 0:45:56.120 --> 0:45:59.359 Yes, he drinks, he fights, he has chicken. 0:45:59.040 --> 0:46:02.080 And beard, and that's that's pretty much. Yet it's kind 0:46:02.080 --> 0:46:04.960 of awful. And I think like he is painted orange 0:46:05.480 --> 0:46:07.440 or I don't like it's like he has like an 0:46:07.440 --> 0:46:10.279 orange beard, like a bright orange beard, and I think 0:46:10.280 --> 0:46:13.520 there's like orange pain on his face. It is it's 0:46:13.600 --> 0:46:16.279 just everything is wrong. About this presentation. 0:46:16.880 --> 0:46:19.440 Okay, but no confusion about class here. This is our 0:46:19.760 --> 0:46:22.480 standard fighter. He's like, got a battle axe, That's what 0:46:22.520 --> 0:46:22.919 he does. 0:46:23.000 --> 0:46:28.120 He specializes, though, in background fighting, not like key villain fighting, 0:46:28.160 --> 0:46:29.600 but just background stuff. 0:46:29.440 --> 0:46:32.000 Doing doing a leg sweep and uh well I think 0:46:32.040 --> 0:46:34.120 he leg sweeps Damodar one time. 0:46:34.200 --> 0:46:36.560 Oh it gets one hit, you know, It's it's a 0:46:36.600 --> 0:46:37.200 team effort. 0:46:37.360 --> 0:46:40.200 Yeah, but mostly you're right. He's back there slamming around 0:46:40.280 --> 0:46:43.000 while our more prominent characters are in the foreground. 0:46:43.680 --> 0:46:46.280 All right. Up next, we have Norda, an Elvin ranger 0:46:46.719 --> 0:46:51.040 played by Kristin Wilson born nineteen sixty nine, American actress 0:46:51.080 --> 0:46:53.759 best known for playing Lisa Doolittle in nineteen ninety eight's 0:46:53.840 --> 0:46:58.640 Doctor Doolittle and It's two thousand and one sequel. Interestingly enough, 0:46:58.840 --> 0:47:02.959 she's married to makeup affects artist Martin Estell's who worked 0:47:03.000 --> 0:47:05.520 on Chronicles of Riddick and also worked on this film, 0:47:06.000 --> 0:47:09.279 So it's very possible that dungeons and dragons brought this 0:47:09.680 --> 0:47:10.400 couple together. 0:47:11.600 --> 0:47:13.319 What better way to find true love. 0:47:14.560 --> 0:47:18.000 As for her performance, I mean, I think it seems fine. 0:47:18.040 --> 0:47:21.759 They have her wearing one of those ridiculous fantasy female breastplates, 0:47:22.960 --> 0:47:26.239 but that aside. You know, I totally bought her as 0:47:26.280 --> 0:47:28.360 a no nonsense Elvian ranger. 0:47:29.200 --> 0:47:32.560 She has a good funny moment when Snails is trying 0:47:32.600 --> 0:47:35.400 to flirt with her and she's like, how old are you? 0:47:35.440 --> 0:47:37.480 And he says twenty three and she's like, I'm two 0:47:37.600 --> 0:47:38.600 hundred and thirty five. 0:47:41.160 --> 0:47:44.560 That was pretty good. Yeah, all right. Next up, we 0:47:44.640 --> 0:47:49.040 have just really a couple of kind of fun cameos, 0:47:49.200 --> 0:47:52.400 a little side characters that are encountered. The first I 0:47:52.400 --> 0:47:54.799 already mentioned in passing that Richard O'Brien shows up, and yes, 0:47:54.920 --> 0:47:59.000 Richard O'Brien shows up as Zilious, a master thief born 0:47:59.120 --> 0:48:01.919 nineteen forty two. This is, of course the mastermind behind 0:48:01.960 --> 0:48:04.680 the Rocky Heart Picture Show, in which he also played 0:48:04.719 --> 0:48:08.760 riff Raff. He played He played Mister Hand in nineteen 0:48:08.840 --> 0:48:11.440 ninety eight s Dark City, and we previously mentioned him 0:48:11.440 --> 0:48:14.040 in our episode on nineteen eighty's Flash Gordon, in which 0:48:14.080 --> 0:48:17.359 he played a character named Falco. We're gonna come back 0:48:17.400 --> 0:48:19.520 to O'Brien in the future when we talk about a 0:48:19.520 --> 0:48:22.359 film in which he's more central, So you know, I'll 0:48:22.400 --> 0:48:25.120 keep this brief and say that, yeah, he does bring 0:48:25.160 --> 0:48:28.600 his signature charisma to this small role, but he still 0:48:28.640 --> 0:48:31.000 manages to feel a bit out of place as well. 0:48:31.440 --> 0:48:33.520 I'd say, once again doing what he can. 0:48:33.960 --> 0:48:40.279 Yeah. Ooh, but then Tom Baker shows up as hal 0:48:40.360 --> 0:48:43.320 varth An Elvin Kleric kind of late in the film. 0:48:43.440 --> 0:48:47.440 He attempts, but what fails to resurrect Snails. Who's he healing? 0:48:47.719 --> 0:48:51.840 He's healing justin Welle healing Ridley. He's like, he's apps 0:48:51.880 --> 0:48:53.480 in with Yellow Zippi's apps. 0:48:53.600 --> 0:48:55.520 That's right. Yeah, Snails is just all the way dead 0:48:55.560 --> 0:48:55.839 at this. 0:48:55.800 --> 0:48:58.920 Point, Snails is dead. Well, Snails does resurrect at the 0:48:59.040 --> 0:49:02.120 end of the movie. Oh okay, remember they like they 0:49:02.120 --> 0:49:04.279 put a thing a jewel on his grave and then 0:49:04.320 --> 0:49:07.200 it suggests he's still alive somewhere else and they could 0:49:07.239 --> 0:49:07.759 go meet him. 0:49:07.800 --> 0:49:10.439 I think, oh, okay, well, all right, there's so there's 0:49:10.440 --> 0:49:13.520 some hope for Snails. Yeah so yeah, okay, so he 0:49:13.520 --> 0:49:14.799 heals our main protagonist. 0:49:15.160 --> 0:49:19.440 Yes he's not. We've been saying about a lot of people. 0:49:19.480 --> 0:49:21.240 They do what they can. I don't know. Tom Baker 0:49:21.280 --> 0:49:23.520 feels like he's kind of sleep walking through this. When 0:49:23.520 --> 0:49:25.640 he says his lines. It feels like he's saying them 0:49:25.680 --> 0:49:26.479 for the first time. 0:49:27.000 --> 0:49:29.279 Oh, I don't know. I mean, that may very well 0:49:29.320 --> 0:49:31.720 be the case, but maybe I just find Tom Baker 0:49:31.760 --> 0:49:34.960 captivating enough that that leak enough for me where I'm like, Hey, 0:49:35.360 --> 0:49:37.200 this guy's doing it, this guy knows what he's doing. 0:49:37.239 --> 0:49:37.640 Look at that. 0:49:38.080 --> 0:49:41.080 I mean Tom Baker's Tom Baker. Yeah he So he 0:49:41.160 --> 0:49:45.160 brings more Doctor Who energy than rasputant energy. 0:49:45.200 --> 0:49:48.560 I'd say here, Yeah, so Tom Baker, if you're not 0:49:48.560 --> 0:49:53.040 famire born nineteen thirty four, still active, I believe, a 0:49:53.160 --> 0:49:55.799 British actor of stage, screen and TV, best known as 0:49:55.840 --> 0:49:59.640 the fourth and longest serving incarnation of the doctor in 0:50:00.000 --> 0:50:02.719 Doctor Who from nineteen seventy four to nineteen eighty one. 0:50:03.320 --> 0:50:06.279 And there have been so many great doctors over the years, 0:50:06.280 --> 0:50:09.320 but I think Baker still stands out as one of 0:50:09.360 --> 0:50:11.480 the most iconic. And I think for me, he's like, 0:50:11.600 --> 0:50:15.000 this is my Doctor Who. If I'm ever if I 0:50:15.000 --> 0:50:17.160 remember in a room and there's a Doctor Who episode 0:50:17.160 --> 0:50:19.920 playing and it's Tom Baker, I'm just drawn in. I've 0:50:19.920 --> 0:50:21.759 got to see what he's gonna do, what's he's gonna say. 0:50:22.560 --> 0:50:23.480 He's my go to. 0:50:24.160 --> 0:50:26.279 Uh yeah, I think I know way less Doctor Who 0:50:26.320 --> 0:50:28.239 than you do, but I do think of them. I 0:50:28.280 --> 0:50:31.400 do think of him as the doctor among many doctors. 0:50:31.840 --> 0:50:34.880 Yeah, so you know, he can play it all. He 0:50:34.880 --> 0:50:39.600 can be silly, obviously. He can also play malicious characters, 0:50:40.160 --> 0:50:42.360 such as in seventy three is the Vault of Horror 0:50:42.400 --> 0:50:45.120 and also the Golden Voyage of Sinbad from the same year. 0:50:45.680 --> 0:50:48.760 He can also play serious really well. And you mentioned 0:50:48.760 --> 0:50:52.320 his role as Resputant and Nicholas and Alexandra from nineteen 0:50:52.360 --> 0:50:54.720 seventy two, for which he was nominated for a Golden Globe. 0:50:55.040 --> 0:50:57.520 He is mesmerizing in that role. 0:50:58.440 --> 0:51:00.600 That's one. I still need to see ivants in that one. 0:51:00.760 --> 0:51:02.640 But I have seen the Golden Voyage it sent that. 0:51:03.920 --> 0:51:06.279 That's a good one. It's got some great monsters in 0:51:06.320 --> 0:51:07.799 it all right. 0:51:07.840 --> 0:51:10.759 And finally, the composer for this film is Justin Cain 0:51:10.920 --> 0:51:14.399 Burnette born nineteen seventy three, American film and video game 0:51:14.480 --> 0:51:17.719 music composer who apparently worked under Hans Zimmer early in 0:51:17.760 --> 0:51:20.560 his career, and he's gone on to score numerous genre 0:51:20.680 --> 0:51:23.240 pictures such as two thousand and fives in American Haunting 0:51:23.600 --> 0:51:26.280 and some fairly big TV projects as well, like The Patient, 0:51:26.880 --> 0:51:29.319 in addition to working in the musical department on some 0:51:29.360 --> 0:51:32.480 pretty big films by the likes of Michael Bay and 0:51:32.560 --> 0:51:34.040 Tony Scott and Ridley Scott. 0:51:34.320 --> 0:51:36.600 I don't think the music in this is bad, though. 0:51:36.719 --> 0:51:40.000 Sometimes it's kind of a funny fit. Like the opening 0:51:40.160 --> 0:51:43.600 fanfare sounds to me a lot like the music from 0:51:43.680 --> 0:51:47.200 a sports movie. It sounds like, oh, you know, Johnny's 0:51:47.239 --> 0:51:49.440 running for the touchdown and you know they finally put 0:51:49.480 --> 0:51:51.840 him in and he's gonna save the team season. 0:51:52.440 --> 0:51:55.200 Yeah, Or it's just kind of like I mean, it's 0:51:55.320 --> 0:51:58.960 like I've said before, you know, sometimes the film's musical 0:51:59.040 --> 0:52:01.960 score needs to kind feel invisible. It's just working in 0:52:01.960 --> 0:52:04.560 the background doing its thing. And you know, I guess 0:52:04.360 --> 0:52:06.759 that's basically what the score here does. 0:52:16.200 --> 0:52:18.320 All right, Well, are you ready to talk about the plot? 0:52:18.600 --> 0:52:19.759 Oh? Yes, let's do it. 0:52:20.239 --> 0:52:23.600 So the movie starts with something that absolutely feels tacked 0:52:23.640 --> 0:52:28.160 on in post production. It's some voiceover narration playing over 0:52:28.239 --> 0:52:32.360 a dismal gray screen with some wisps of CGI missed, 0:52:33.239 --> 0:52:35.480 and it's just an old man's voice. I don't know 0:52:35.480 --> 0:52:39.360 who's talking here, but it says the Empire of Ismir 0:52:39.520 --> 0:52:43.240 has long been a divided land ruled by the Mages 0:52:43.400 --> 0:52:47.680 an elite group of magic users. The lowly commoners, those 0:52:47.719 --> 0:52:52.400 without magic, are little more than slaves. Izmir's young Empress 0:52:52.440 --> 0:52:56.760 Savina wishes equality and prosperity for all, but the evil 0:52:56.840 --> 0:52:59.319 mage Profion has other intentions. 0:53:00.680 --> 0:53:03.040 No, I have to admit it's intriguing. Imagine if they've 0:53:03.080 --> 0:53:03.840 shown us any of this. 0:53:05.000 --> 0:53:08.040 Yeah, so the horns start blasting. This is the part 0:53:08.080 --> 0:53:10.960 where it sounds like football. And then we zoom over 0:53:11.000 --> 0:53:14.280 a bunch of CGI. So we're zooming over bridges spanning 0:53:14.280 --> 0:53:18.960 a waterway with a mini towered castle rising beyond. And 0:53:19.320 --> 0:53:21.960 real question when we get a look at this castle, 0:53:22.080 --> 0:53:26.080 I was genuinely wondering, is this CGI model based on 0:53:26.200 --> 0:53:29.520 the Disney Castle image, the more elaborate one, Because it 0:53:29.560 --> 0:53:30.319 looks like it. 0:53:30.600 --> 0:53:33.520 We are like swooping in on it. It feels like it 0:53:33.719 --> 0:53:36.800 very much the same trajectory as we do the Disney Castle, 0:53:36.840 --> 0:53:40.719 and the opening Disney logo sequence feels a lot like it. 0:53:41.320 --> 0:53:44.320 But then, perhaps fittingly for the theme, does the camera 0:53:44.400 --> 0:53:47.240 fly into a window in one of the majestic lofty 0:53:47.320 --> 0:53:50.160 towers in the sky. No, it does not. Instead, we 0:53:50.280 --> 0:53:53.759 plunge down over the surface of the moat and then 0:53:53.800 --> 0:53:57.240 straight through the heavy iron bars of a gate leading 0:53:57.280 --> 0:53:58.520 into a dungeon. 0:53:59.280 --> 0:54:01.520 It's fittings. You know, we didn't really get into this, 0:54:01.560 --> 0:54:04.560 but it's called dungeons and dragons, so you can imagine. 0:54:04.560 --> 0:54:07.320 Producers are like, Okay, there needs to be a dungeon 0:54:07.840 --> 0:54:10.239 and there needs to be a dragon, and really, if 0:54:10.239 --> 0:54:11.799 you could fit all of this into the first ten 0:54:11.840 --> 0:54:13.799 minutes of the film, that would be great. 0:54:14.239 --> 0:54:17.239 So the environments here, again to emphasize, are at this 0:54:17.360 --> 0:54:22.239 point CGI and the animation is murky and hideous. I 0:54:22.280 --> 0:54:24.719 was trying to describe what these environments look like. It's 0:54:24.760 --> 0:54:28.400 a little difficult, but like in nineties computer game terms, 0:54:29.000 --> 0:54:33.120 imagine the CD ROM game Missed, but make it fugly 0:54:33.360 --> 0:54:38.280 instead of mysterious. So it's like misst but with the drab, 0:54:38.440 --> 0:54:42.480 depressing color palette of the original quake. Yes, So we 0:54:42.600 --> 0:54:45.359 fly through a tunnel in this dungeon into a room 0:54:45.400 --> 0:54:48.040 where a bunch of hooded occult servants are toiling in 0:54:48.080 --> 0:54:53.279 the dark. There are chains, ladders, gears, lanterns, and skulls, 0:54:53.360 --> 0:54:57.040 lots of skulls just sitting around in random places. There's 0:54:57.040 --> 0:54:59.280 one thing that looks like a kind of a ramp 0:54:59.360 --> 0:55:02.400 or a gangway on top of a pipe that's pouring 0:55:02.480 --> 0:55:05.320 water into a big stone pool, and on the ramp 0:55:05.360 --> 0:55:07.560 there's just a skull sitting right in the middle of it. 0:55:07.600 --> 0:55:08.920 Somebody's gonna step on that. 0:55:09.320 --> 0:55:11.880 Like, oh, this one fell out, just put it on 0:55:11.880 --> 0:55:12.560 top of the box. 0:55:12.760 --> 0:55:15.399 There's some kind of big machine being operated, so we've 0:55:15.440 --> 0:55:19.200 got cultists. They're pulling chains and working levers. There's a 0:55:19.239 --> 0:55:22.600 big cogwheel revolving, and then in the middle of the 0:55:22.680 --> 0:55:26.239 room there is a three axis gimbal. So you might 0:55:26.280 --> 0:55:28.080 have seen these with like I don't know, used for 0:55:28.160 --> 0:55:31.280 astronaut training, where it's the rings that spin within rings 0:55:31.320 --> 0:55:35.759 along the different axes. And what's in the middle is 0:55:35.840 --> 0:55:38.920 not an astronaut. It is a large black scepter fixed 0:55:38.960 --> 0:55:40.120 with a green jewel. 0:55:40.960 --> 0:55:43.480 You know, I need to throw in here. I was 0:55:43.520 --> 0:55:46.080 able to get my kid to watch the first like 0:55:46.280 --> 0:55:49.680 thirty minutes of this film with me because they're about 0:55:49.719 --> 0:55:52.840 to turn thirteen and they're already super into Dungeons and Dragons. 0:55:53.120 --> 0:55:56.560 You know, they've read the books, they're playing the game, 0:55:57.160 --> 0:55:59.440 and so it was fun to watch part of this. 0:55:59.560 --> 0:56:02.000 I really didn't expect or demand that they watch all 0:56:02.040 --> 0:56:04.239 of this film with me. But at this point they 0:56:04.239 --> 0:56:07.120 were already like, oh, it looks like they're making a 0:56:07.640 --> 0:56:09.960 making a magical item there, and they started spouting all 0:56:09.960 --> 0:56:12.000 the rules for how long it's going to take to 0:56:12.040 --> 0:56:13.840 make a magical weapon and so forth. 0:56:14.080 --> 0:56:15.960 Did this lead to frustration. 0:56:18.000 --> 0:56:20.680 That they did quickly realize this is not a good film, 0:56:21.400 --> 0:56:25.719 but they didn't seem bored And I have to drive home. 0:56:26.160 --> 0:56:30.080 At this point we are into the physical sets, practical sets, 0:56:30.400 --> 0:56:33.280 and it's a totally different vibe, like, Yeah, I'm buying 0:56:33.320 --> 0:56:35.560 this as a real place and I'm intrigued by what's 0:56:35.600 --> 0:56:36.200 going on here. 0:56:36.800 --> 0:56:39.799 And then also, hey, so yeah, we've come out of 0:56:39.840 --> 0:56:42.799 the CGI into the real sets and we get our 0:56:42.840 --> 0:56:45.640 first glimpse of the main attraction, Jeremy Irons. 0:56:45.800 --> 0:56:48.680 Oh what an entry. It's so good. 0:56:49.080 --> 0:56:52.040 Yeah. So he's like an evil mage dressed in black, 0:56:52.120 --> 0:56:55.400 wearing a burgundy cloak, and from the very first second 0:56:55.440 --> 0:56:59.360 he appears, he is just squealing with raw ham energy. 0:57:00.080 --> 0:57:03.840 He comes waltzing down the dungeon stairs towards the scepter machine, 0:57:03.880 --> 0:57:06.040 and he's got his arms stretched out to the sides 0:57:06.120 --> 0:57:10.160 like he's doing ballet. And also off to the side, 0:57:10.200 --> 0:57:14.359 you've got Bruce Payne playing the henchman Damnadar, and again, yeah, 0:57:14.400 --> 0:57:17.560 he's like bald and haughty with with the muscle morph 0:57:17.760 --> 0:57:20.360 armor and the big sword and the electric blue lips. 0:57:21.520 --> 0:57:24.520 And then we get a close up of Profyon the 0:57:24.520 --> 0:57:27.800 Mage here looking evil, and it's a close up, like 0:57:27.880 --> 0:57:30.680 his face fills the entire frame and you can see 0:57:30.720 --> 0:57:33.880 all his pores. You can see that this must have 0:57:33.960 --> 0:57:37.200 been filmed in the afternoon because his mustache stubble is 0:57:37.240 --> 0:57:40.040 starting to come in, and you can see the way 0:57:40.080 --> 0:57:43.200 someone appears to have combed his eyebrows so that the 0:57:43.280 --> 0:57:47.000 hairs all flare upward. And then the evil music swells 0:57:47.320 --> 0:57:51.320 and it's clear he wants that scepter, so he steps 0:57:51.360 --> 0:57:54.320 forward and he sticks his hand out and zaps the 0:57:54.440 --> 0:57:57.720 rod with force lightning. Also you can see rob I've 0:57:57.760 --> 0:57:59.760 got a screenshot for you to look at here, but 0:57:59.840 --> 0:58:03.480 it's like he has to step over some little moats, 0:58:03.720 --> 0:58:07.040 little like gutters on the floor in order to get 0:58:07.080 --> 0:58:09.000 to the thing. He's gonna get his cloak wet. 0:58:09.360 --> 0:58:11.840 That's true. I mean you've got to just expect to 0:58:11.880 --> 0:58:14.160 get your cloak muddy and bloody. 0:58:13.800 --> 0:58:18.080 And wet in these scenarios. Yeah, So Profion starts chanting 0:58:18.120 --> 0:58:20.400 a magic spell. It's a bunch of nonsense words, and 0:58:20.400 --> 0:58:23.720 we see little cgi dragons flying around inside a kind 0:58:23.760 --> 0:58:27.280 of portal in the gimbal machine. And then Jeremy Irons 0:58:27.360 --> 0:58:30.600 keeps ratcheting up the intensity and his face bones so 0:58:30.640 --> 0:58:32.840 it just goes in on him and he's going off. 0:58:33.720 --> 0:58:38.360 His face is getting weirder and crazier, and something finally 0:58:38.440 --> 0:58:42.120 works with his magic. The machine stops spinning and Profion 0:58:42.160 --> 0:58:45.640 can approach and remove the artifact and it's glowing green. 0:58:45.840 --> 0:58:49.560 It casts a sickly green light over his face. And oh, 0:58:49.600 --> 0:58:52.440 my lord, the expressions he is making here, Like he 0:58:53.000 --> 0:58:59.000 projects a quivering, overtly sexual ecstasy as he takes hold 0:58:59.040 --> 0:59:02.120 of the magic step. So he like grabs the rod 0:59:02.200 --> 0:59:05.160 with this electric zapping effect and then he holds it 0:59:05.240 --> 0:59:11.440 up in the air, screaming yes, and just like Folks, 0:59:11.560 --> 0:59:13.480 even if you don't want to watch the whole movie, 0:59:13.560 --> 0:59:16.400 I recommend you watched this scene at the beginning, just 0:59:16.440 --> 0:59:20.560 to do like the Jeremy Iron's face survey, you know, 0:59:20.640 --> 0:59:24.000 add little tasting notes at all, the little moments where 0:59:24.000 --> 0:59:27.120 you get to see his teeth doing this, his tongue 0:59:27.160 --> 0:59:29.800 doing that. What's that sound he's making? Why is he 0:59:29.840 --> 0:59:33.040 going bad? It is so good. 0:59:33.160 --> 0:59:35.880 Yeah, if you watch nothing else, watch the first fifteen 0:59:35.920 --> 0:59:38.800 minutes because you will get so much of this performance. 0:59:39.520 --> 0:59:42.160 It is just oh, it is just a like a 0:59:42.320 --> 0:59:47.840 stiff shot of absolute like one twenty percent to Jeremy 0:59:47.840 --> 0:59:48.880 Iron's ham. 0:59:49.080 --> 0:59:51.520 Yeah, and of course it's it's Bruce Payne approved. He's 0:59:51.520 --> 0:59:54.240 sitting there like the you know, his lips tight together, 0:59:54.320 --> 0:59:56.160 like yep, yep, that's my boss. 0:59:57.600 --> 0:59:58.760 Oh god, those lips. 0:59:59.520 --> 1:00:02.800 So pro says, come Damadhar, and they walk up the 1:00:02.840 --> 1:00:05.240 steps to a big door that has what can only 1:00:05.280 --> 1:00:08.080 be described as a dragon logo on it. 1:00:08.640 --> 1:00:08.880 Yeah. 1:00:08.960 --> 1:00:12.280 Yeah, it's like behind this door it's dragons are us. 1:00:13.040 --> 1:00:16.960 And Profion calls out to his terrified hooded servants. He says, 1:00:17.040 --> 1:00:21.200 release him. So the guys in hoods they're trembling with fear. 1:00:21.320 --> 1:00:24.120 They start cranking a bunch of wheels and levers and 1:00:24.320 --> 1:00:26.960 the door opens up to dragons r us and what 1:00:26.960 --> 1:00:29.080 do you know, there's a dragon inside and it starts 1:00:29.080 --> 1:00:34.800 coming out, and what a dragon this is. As I've 1:00:34.800 --> 1:00:37.080 said many times now, we're trying not to just hate 1:00:37.080 --> 1:00:39.400 on the movie too much, but We've got to tell 1:00:39.400 --> 1:00:41.760 you straight that this is some of the worst CGI 1:00:41.960 --> 1:00:44.480 I can think of in any major motion picture. 1:00:45.400 --> 1:00:48.720 Yes, oh my goodness, I mean the dragon does does 1:00:48.800 --> 1:00:53.160 not look good. I mean the the CGI is not good. 1:00:53.280 --> 1:00:56.240 And then just it's just such a generic looking dragon 1:00:56.280 --> 1:00:59.080 as well. I mean, especially when you consider what's already 1:00:59.080 --> 1:01:03.040 come before practic We talked about Verma Thrack's pejorative in 1:01:03.200 --> 1:01:07.120 the Dragon Swayer on a previous episode of Weird House Cinema, 1:01:07.160 --> 1:01:10.720 like one of the greatest dragons ever brought to life 1:01:10.760 --> 1:01:13.280 on the screen. To go from something like that to 1:01:13.360 --> 1:01:16.080 something like this, it's just it's a travesty. 1:01:16.480 --> 1:01:19.000 Now, it doesn't look quite so bad at the very 1:01:19.040 --> 1:01:23.320 first moment because it's farther away and partially hidden in darkness. 1:01:23.840 --> 1:01:26.400 But then it like lunges out and it starts spitting 1:01:26.480 --> 1:01:29.360 fire on all the hooded cult guys and it roars 1:01:29.400 --> 1:01:31.600 into the camera. I think they were actually going for 1:01:31.680 --> 1:01:34.200 a callback to Jurassic Park. There are a couple of 1:01:34.240 --> 1:01:38.000 moments where it does where the CGI dragon does a 1:01:38.640 --> 1:01:41.440 kind of body motion or something almost exactly like a 1:01:41.480 --> 1:01:44.520 shot in Jurassic Park, and it seems not accidental. 1:01:44.960 --> 1:01:51.120 It is often sobering to realize how early Jurassic Park 1:01:51.200 --> 1:01:53.560 comes out in relation to some of these films with 1:01:53.640 --> 1:01:55.280 bad CGI monsters later on. 1:01:55.600 --> 1:01:59.760 Yeah, but yeah this, so this dragon is not finished baking, 1:01:59.840 --> 1:02:01.959 but no more time. It's out of the heaven. 1:02:02.080 --> 1:02:03.880 Yeah, we gotta get this out before Y two K. 1:02:04.200 --> 1:02:07.560 Yeah, and so Profion commands the dragon to approach him, 1:02:07.720 --> 1:02:11.000 and he starts gloating. He says, yes, I control dragons now, 1:02:11.040 --> 1:02:15.240 and Damodar is just dripping with obsequious flattery. He's like, 1:02:15.320 --> 1:02:19.480 you have the power of the immortals, and Profion says 1:02:19.600 --> 1:02:23.440 he's snarling. He says, with a dragon army at my command, 1:02:23.560 --> 1:02:26.800 I can crush the Impress. I can control what is 1:02:26.920 --> 1:02:29.200 rightfully ours. Go. I'm not going to keep trying to 1:02:29.240 --> 1:02:32.560 do the Jeremy Iron's voice when I quote him. So 1:02:32.800 --> 1:02:35.680 he just keeps doing amazingly weird stuff with his face, 1:02:36.000 --> 1:02:39.200 voice and tongue. Here, Rob, this is the part where 1:02:39.200 --> 1:02:44.440 you were talking about his skull trying to escape, and 1:02:44.520 --> 1:02:46.920 so he's oh, and he also he says things that 1:02:47.000 --> 1:02:49.920 are echoing kind of the Emperor in Return of the Jedi. 1:02:50.080 --> 1:02:55.360 He's like, I can use every ounce of your rage. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, 1:02:55.400 --> 1:03:00.919 and unfortunately nothing gold can stay. There's a little pun 1:03:00.920 --> 1:03:04.040 because this is a gold dragon. Apparently something goes wrong 1:03:04.080 --> 1:03:05.280 and Profion. 1:03:05.000 --> 1:03:07.200 Keeps do they say it's a gold dragon? 1:03:07.400 --> 1:03:11.480 They say, they say that the Impresses dragons are gold dragons. 1:03:12.080 --> 1:03:13.720 Well, that's not right. I'm not going to get into it. 1:03:14.080 --> 1:03:17.400 That's that's I mean, that shouldn't be. Gold dragons are special. 1:03:17.400 --> 1:03:18.560 They're nobody's dungeon. 1:03:18.880 --> 1:03:20.600 Well no, I think we do need to get into 1:03:20.600 --> 1:03:23.720 this later. Because also they bring up like red dragons 1:03:23.760 --> 1:03:26.960 in contrast to the gold dragons, as if like it 1:03:27.040 --> 1:03:30.040 was like, oh, oh, red dragons, that that would be 1:03:30.120 --> 1:03:33.959 really that's really something, okay. 1:03:33.760 --> 1:03:36.360 I mean in short, like gold dragons are good and 1:03:36.560 --> 1:03:39.439 red dragons are bad. Okay, So it's weird that we're 1:03:39.440 --> 1:03:41.160 dealing with a gold dragon like. 1:03:41.160 --> 1:03:44.439 This, Well the gold dragon here, that makes sense because 1:03:44.480 --> 1:03:47.200 the gold dragon does not want to obey Profion, and 1:03:47.240 --> 1:03:50.080 so it like starts backing up into it. Cl It's like, no, no, 1:03:50.080 --> 1:03:53.120 I'm not working with this guy. And then the door 1:03:53.200 --> 1:03:56.120 slams shut on it and like stabs it and and 1:03:56.200 --> 1:03:59.120 a death recalling almost exactly in another callback to Return 1:03:59.120 --> 1:04:01.320 of the Jedi, the Demid the rank or in return 1:04:01.360 --> 1:04:04.000 of the Jedi. That's right, they rank or it and 1:04:04.040 --> 1:04:08.160 then we get to watch the dragon's cgi blood spill 1:04:08.200 --> 1:04:11.120 out and pool on the floor and then run down 1:04:11.240 --> 1:04:15.800 the stairs, which looks absolutely hilarious. And I have questions 1:04:15.840 --> 1:04:19.680 about shots like this in the movies, like how expensive 1:04:19.760 --> 1:04:22.760 would it have been to actually just pour some red 1:04:22.840 --> 1:04:26.640 krosyrup blood down a staircase versus the cost of computer 1:04:26.840 --> 1:04:30.680 animating flowing blood in the year two thousand? Why would 1:04:30.680 --> 1:04:31.960 this be done? Yeah? 1:04:31.960 --> 1:04:33.600 I mean, I guess we have to be at that 1:04:33.640 --> 1:04:37.360 tipping point here where the digital effect is cheaper than 1:04:37.360 --> 1:04:39.840 the practical effect, even though the digital does not look 1:04:39.880 --> 1:04:40.960 nearly as believable. 1:04:41.520 --> 1:04:44.960 How could that even be though? Like how much does 1:04:45.000 --> 1:04:47.120 it cost to make a bucket of fake blood? And 1:04:47.200 --> 1:04:49.160 just I mean, I guess the cost of the labor 1:04:49.240 --> 1:04:51.080 to clean it up after you've spilled it? 1:04:51.200 --> 1:04:53.360 Like, yeah, I don't know. I mean maybe it's it's 1:04:53.400 --> 1:04:55.480 there in the budget chet where they're like, we're already 1:04:55.480 --> 1:04:57.680 paying for these digital effects, let's have them do the blood. 1:04:57.720 --> 1:05:00.920 I don't know, they can't afford some just good Kensington 1:05:01.000 --> 1:05:02.920 Gore whip stuff on the spot. 1:05:03.000 --> 1:05:07.880 Bizarre anyway, Jeremy irons he like groans with frustration. It's 1:05:07.920 --> 1:05:10.880 like not again, and he puts his head in his hands. 1:05:10.920 --> 1:05:14.880 He just foiled. So he says, this is the part 1:05:14.880 --> 1:05:17.680 where he says, we shall have to modify our plans. 1:05:18.120 --> 1:05:20.080 He says they're going to summon the High Council of 1:05:20.160 --> 1:05:23.280 Mages and that he's going to try to turn them 1:05:23.400 --> 1:05:26.560 against the Impress, and Damadar says it will be done. 1:05:27.720 --> 1:05:30.520 And then oh, when the cgi blood hits the water below, 1:05:30.600 --> 1:05:33.439 the water catches fire, and then the fire runs out 1:05:33.480 --> 1:05:35.920 of the dungeon into the moat all around the castle. 1:05:36.000 --> 1:05:38.720 So the whole city can see the fire, and they 1:05:38.720 --> 1:05:40.400 gather around the moat to look at. 1:05:40.280 --> 1:05:45.520 It, but they're not like super concerned. It's kind of like, oh, 1:05:44.480 --> 1:05:48.360 the river's on fire again, you know, It's just this happens. 1:05:48.480 --> 1:05:50.880 This is just the kind of ecological nightmare we're living in. 1:05:51.040 --> 1:05:55.160 It's the Cuyahoga. Yeah. So on the banks of the moat, 1:05:55.200 --> 1:05:58.760 here we meet our two protagonists. This is our pair 1:05:58.800 --> 1:06:02.160 of buddy rogues. This is Ridley and Snails, Justin Whalen 1:06:02.320 --> 1:06:06.600 and Marlon Wayans. Ridley's first line, commenting on the water 1:06:06.680 --> 1:06:09.880 catching fire. He says, I'm telling you it's got to 1:06:09.920 --> 1:06:15.800 be some twisted magic experiment gone seriously wrong. And you know, 1:06:15.880 --> 1:06:18.840 Snails is less, He's got less of a bee in 1:06:18.880 --> 1:06:21.760 his bondet about this. He's just like, you know, Ridley, 1:06:21.760 --> 1:06:24.640 why are you always mad at the Mages? And Ridley says, 1:06:25.000 --> 1:06:27.040 I'd just love to find a way to give those 1:06:27.080 --> 1:06:31.720 mages some payback. So, as I said earlier, in this movie, 1:06:31.880 --> 1:06:37.040 mages seems to be an economic class. Mages are the rich, 1:06:37.560 --> 1:06:40.800 seemingly whether or not they're personally really like a wizard. 1:06:41.280 --> 1:06:43.880 And Ridley and Snails, on the other hand, are representatives 1:06:43.920 --> 1:06:47.600 of the common people. Ridley is a sort of idealistic 1:06:47.880 --> 1:06:50.280 class warrior who wants to fight for the poor and 1:06:50.320 --> 1:06:53.800 stick it to the mages, and Snails is less idealistic. 1:06:53.880 --> 1:06:56.160 The way he explains it, he's like, the world's never 1:06:56.200 --> 1:06:58.720 going to change. There are the haves, the have nots, 1:06:58.800 --> 1:07:01.880 and the gotta gets, and we two rogues. We are 1:07:01.880 --> 1:07:05.160 in the last group where the gotta gets. But Ridley 1:07:05.160 --> 1:07:07.520 comes up with an idea of what they should do 1:07:07.600 --> 1:07:10.000 to punish the Mages for setting fire to the river. 1:07:10.320 --> 1:07:12.800 They're going to pull off a heist at the Magic School, 1:07:12.920 --> 1:07:17.520 which is in the highest tower in the castle. And 1:07:17.840 --> 1:07:19.600 also I'm not going to narrate all this as we 1:07:19.680 --> 1:07:21.360 go on throughout the movie, but just be aware that 1:07:21.400 --> 1:07:24.560 in every scene with Ridley and Snails, there's a lot 1:07:24.600 --> 1:07:27.720 of what is supposed to be comedic banter and like 1:07:27.800 --> 1:07:30.720 you know, comedic back and forth and zany character gags, 1:07:31.400 --> 1:07:33.320 and I'm trying to be generous, but most of it 1:07:33.360 --> 1:07:36.160 does not work very well, and it is rarely very funny. 1:07:36.800 --> 1:07:40.040 So they have decided that they are going to get 1:07:40.040 --> 1:07:42.960 their revenge by breaking into the stronghold of some of 1:07:43.000 --> 1:07:46.200 the most powerful and dangerous people on the planet. 1:07:46.240 --> 1:07:48.000 Okay, yes, and they're going to steal from them. 1:07:48.040 --> 1:07:53.600 Ye all right, sounds good. Sounds like a good plant. 1:07:58.680 --> 1:08:00.480 So from here we move on to it scene that 1:08:00.520 --> 1:08:04.000 looks like it was filmed in the opera house in Amadeas. 1:08:04.160 --> 1:08:07.960 It's like a beautiful interior location, but this is the 1:08:08.000 --> 1:08:10.960 Council of Mages and it's got box seats full of 1:08:11.000 --> 1:08:13.560 old men and cloaks, and there appears to be a 1:08:13.600 --> 1:08:17.400 sort of floor debate going on between Profion and a 1:08:17.439 --> 1:08:21.360 guy who's sort of impress Savena's ally named Asmath. So 1:08:22.160 --> 1:08:24.360 there are a lot of old men yelling in the background, 1:08:24.360 --> 1:08:27.120 But basically the gist of the scene is that Profion 1:08:27.240 --> 1:08:29.839 is saying, the Empress is going to dissolve the Council 1:08:29.920 --> 1:08:33.880 of Mages and seize power for herself. He explains that 1:08:33.960 --> 1:08:36.599 she wants to do this because of her naive belief 1:08:36.920 --> 1:08:40.360 that she can bring justice and equality to all the people. 1:08:40.920 --> 1:08:45.040 And then as Math tries to calm him down, he's like, oh, no, no, no. 1:08:45.160 --> 1:08:47.840 In time, with our council, she will come to see 1:08:47.920 --> 1:08:52.040 why things cannot be changed. And then Profion says, maybe so, 1:08:52.360 --> 1:08:54.240 but is that a risk you are willing to take. 1:08:54.560 --> 1:08:58.160 Her revolutionary ideas have already taken root among the people. 1:08:58.520 --> 1:09:01.400 In time, her influence will go row. As the months 1:09:01.400 --> 1:09:03.960 go by, she will learn to master the powers of 1:09:04.000 --> 1:09:07.000 her scepter, and when she does, I have no doubt 1:09:07.040 --> 1:09:09.800 she will use it to enforce her changes upon us. 1:09:10.600 --> 1:09:10.720 Uh. 1:09:10.880 --> 1:09:15.840 And so you know, they're they're arguing about this political situation, 1:09:15.960 --> 1:09:17.840 but I feel like we need to go one step of, 1:09:18.479 --> 1:09:20.760 we need to go one step back. What does the 1:09:20.800 --> 1:09:24.280 Council of Mages do? Like, what are its powers and 1:09:24.320 --> 1:09:25.520 agenda currently? 1:09:25.800 --> 1:09:27.639 Yeah, what are the checks and balances right. 1:09:28.320 --> 1:09:31.840 Anyway, Profion urges the council to vote to remove the 1:09:31.880 --> 1:09:35.360 scepter from the Empress's control and destroy the threat of 1:09:35.439 --> 1:09:38.400 revolution forever. Is this supposed to be the sceptor that 1:09:38.439 --> 1:09:41.439 he was already trying to use in the scene before. 1:09:41.640 --> 1:09:45.799 I think I become increasingly confused about scepters in this movie. 1:09:46.320 --> 1:09:49.320 It starts out so clear, like there's the scepter, it's 1:09:49.360 --> 1:09:51.679 got a you know, a grain gem on it, trying 1:09:51.680 --> 1:09:53.439 to use it to control the dragons. But then there's 1:09:53.439 --> 1:09:56.080 talk of her scepter later on, there's a skeleton with 1:09:56.120 --> 1:09:58.680 a sceptor. Are these a rod? Are they? 1:09:58.760 --> 1:09:58.880 Oh? 1:09:58.920 --> 1:09:59.519 That's the rod? 1:10:00.240 --> 1:10:00.439 Rod? 1:10:01.160 --> 1:10:05.960 Okay? But I found myself confused at multiple times, like rod, scepter, 1:10:06.479 --> 1:10:09.200 multiple scepters, multiple rods. I don't know. 1:10:09.600 --> 1:10:12.240 Only a fool would confuse a rod with a sceptor. 1:10:14.840 --> 1:10:16.840 And then also we get a scene where we meet 1:10:16.880 --> 1:10:21.519 the Empress somewhere else in the castle, so thora Birch 1:10:21.640 --> 1:10:24.320 is she's the Impress, She's she's kind of goth in 1:10:24.400 --> 1:10:27.080 this scene, but in a later scene she's got some 1:10:27.880 --> 1:10:31.320 are they cool? Yeah? I guess cool? Cool weird costumes 1:10:31.320 --> 1:10:33.360 in this movie and this this scene, she's kind of 1:10:33.360 --> 1:10:36.559 goth with like pins stuck in her hair. Later on 1:10:36.680 --> 1:10:39.920 she'll be in like bizarre gold chain mail. 1:10:40.479 --> 1:10:42.080 She looks more comfortable here for sure. 1:10:42.280 --> 1:10:46.400 Yes, but this scene was actually shot in a very 1:10:46.439 --> 1:10:48.720 beautiful location. Once again, I think this must be some 1:10:48.800 --> 1:10:51.760 kind of cathedral or basilica somewhere. This doesn't look like 1:10:51.760 --> 1:10:55.559 a movie set anyway. She's been She's being advised by 1:10:55.560 --> 1:10:59.240 a kindly older mage named Vilden, and he explains that 1:10:59.479 --> 1:11:02.160 the the mages are afraid of her because she believes 1:11:02.160 --> 1:11:05.160 in freedom and equality for all the people, and so 1:11:05.200 --> 1:11:07.600 they're trying to limit her power. And he's got a 1:11:07.640 --> 1:11:10.439 way for her to outsmart the mage counsel and get 1:11:10.439 --> 1:11:13.400 the upper hand, and that is to acquire the rod. 1:11:13.600 --> 1:11:16.599 You know the rod. Yes, it's the mcguffin, the main 1:11:16.680 --> 1:11:19.360 mcguffin of the movie. She's got to acquire the Rod 1:11:19.439 --> 1:11:24.280 of Savriel, which controls dragons, but unlike her scepter, it 1:11:24.320 --> 1:11:28.120 controls red dragons. Here's what I was talking about. In 1:11:28.200 --> 1:11:30.599 the scene. They don't explain it. Is this something that 1:11:30.640 --> 1:11:33.559 the audience is supposed to understand because it's just like, oh, 1:11:33.760 --> 1:11:35.799 red dragons. Oh wow? 1:11:35.960 --> 1:11:39.280 Okay, By the way, I want to add that it 1:11:39.320 --> 1:11:42.479 does kind of feel like every MPC we encounter has 1:11:42.520 --> 1:11:45.040 a name made up on the fly by the DM 1:11:45.439 --> 1:11:48.680 where the game's like. And then the mage introduces his 1:11:48.840 --> 1:11:53.320 name as Vilden his name, and let me write that 1:11:53.360 --> 1:11:54.240 down so I remember it. 1:11:54.320 --> 1:11:57.680 Later the exact same thought. The naming game is not 1:11:57.960 --> 1:12:07.280 strong here Wilden, Yes, a Profion Yeah, anyway, Profion overhears 1:12:07.320 --> 1:12:10.559 this conversation with the help of a little magical spy creature. 1:12:10.840 --> 1:12:12.400 Where is this supposed to be a mefeit? 1:12:12.960 --> 1:12:16.400 You think, yes, I did not make this connection, but 1:12:16.840 --> 1:12:19.080 my kid did. They were like, oh the method. 1:12:19.200 --> 1:12:21.280 I think that could be right. Yeah, okay, anyway, so 1:12:21.360 --> 1:12:24.160 he's got a little like spy, a little gray spy 1:12:24.240 --> 1:12:27.599 demon that runs around peeping on things. And then he 1:12:27.640 --> 1:12:30.800 knows immediately. So Jeremy Irons is like, I must have 1:12:30.960 --> 1:12:34.320 the Rod of Savriel. He says, with one wave of it, 1:12:34.400 --> 1:12:36.320 he's going to be able to topple the Empress and 1:12:36.439 --> 1:12:39.640 bring down that useless Council of idiots with her. So 1:12:40.320 --> 1:12:42.960 he sends Damodar to the Magic School to steal the 1:12:42.960 --> 1:12:46.479 scroll that shows the location of the Rod of Savriel 1:12:46.640 --> 1:12:50.400 from Vilden and then kill Vilden too. So here's where 1:12:50.439 --> 1:12:53.160 our characters start kind of colliding with each other. So 1:12:53.360 --> 1:12:56.920 Ridley and Snails they sneak into the magic School to 1:12:57.040 --> 1:12:59.400 steal things in the night. Of course, they're using rope 1:12:59.439 --> 1:13:02.040 and grappling hooks. You know, they're rogues, that's what you do. 1:13:03.120 --> 1:13:05.320 They make a lot of jokes about how Snails, I 1:13:05.360 --> 1:13:08.120 think is afraid of heights, which is not great for 1:13:08.200 --> 1:13:08.719 a rogue. 1:13:10.200 --> 1:13:13.360 But rogues can always go under or through, they don't 1:13:13.360 --> 1:13:14.040 have to go over. 1:13:14.400 --> 1:13:17.080 I guess that's true. And then there's some gags here 1:13:17.120 --> 1:13:20.840 with like big foam dragon teeth and magical boxes of 1:13:20.920 --> 1:13:24.320 illusions and stuff. Meanwhile, in the room next door we 1:13:24.360 --> 1:13:28.160 meet another character. This is Vildun's assistant, Marina, who is 1:13:28.200 --> 1:13:31.519 a young mage in training. Yes her name is Marina 1:13:31.680 --> 1:13:36.200 like the place where boats go, and Marina is very intelligent, 1:13:36.280 --> 1:13:39.679 but she is also snobby and condescending to non mages. 1:13:41.040 --> 1:13:43.479 So Vilden and Marina are looking for the scroll that 1:13:43.560 --> 1:13:45.800 says where the rod is, because you know, you got 1:13:45.800 --> 1:13:48.519 to get the rod, and eventually they find it, but 1:13:48.600 --> 1:13:52.160 they are interrupted when Marina catches Ridley and Snails in 1:13:52.200 --> 1:13:55.439 the middle of like loading up their lut sacks. She 1:13:55.640 --> 1:13:58.280 ties them up with a magical lasso, but then is 1:13:58.320 --> 1:14:01.160 interrupted once again when damn It shows up to kill 1:14:01.240 --> 1:14:06.040 Vildan and take the scroll. So Damodar kills Vilden and 1:14:06.120 --> 1:14:09.120 Marina escapes through a magical portal, the first of many, 1:14:10.080 --> 1:14:13.880 with the scroll, inadvertently pulling Ridley and Snails along behind 1:14:13.880 --> 1:14:16.760 her with the lasso. This portal takes them out into 1:14:16.800 --> 1:14:19.880 the streets of the city below, and then, while running 1:14:19.920 --> 1:14:23.080 through the streets pursued by the bad guys, our three 1:14:23.120 --> 1:14:26.080 young heroes bump into a dwarf warrior who I believe 1:14:26.160 --> 1:14:28.040 is sleeping in a big compost heap. 1:14:28.520 --> 1:14:31.679 Yes, because according to this film, that's what dwarfs do. 1:14:31.960 --> 1:14:35.519 They drink, they eat, they don't brush their teeth, and 1:14:35.640 --> 1:14:37.360 they sleep on piles. 1:14:37.080 --> 1:14:41.679 Of garbage on compost. Yeah. So now our three heroes, 1:14:41.720 --> 1:14:43.920 and then now also the dwarf fighter, who we will 1:14:43.920 --> 1:14:47.040 come to learn is named Elwood. They all dive down 1:14:47.240 --> 1:14:50.360 into a drain pipe in the sewer to escape as 1:14:50.439 --> 1:14:53.479 Damodar closes in. So Elwood is just a member of 1:14:53.479 --> 1:14:55.880 the party. Now, it's that fast. They just bump into 1:14:55.960 --> 1:14:58.280 him in some garbage, and now he's part of the party. 1:14:58.400 --> 1:15:00.799 That was his call to adventure was just somebody bumped 1:15:00.800 --> 1:15:04.000 into him. Now we're hanging out. 1:15:03.960 --> 1:15:06.160 And here's where we get one of Bruce Payne's most 1:15:06.360 --> 1:15:09.640 unbelievable line deliveries. I wrote down exactly what it is. 1:15:09.880 --> 1:15:13.519 He says, post brigades at every sewer, entrance and exit. 1:15:13.840 --> 1:15:16.400 I want them found now. But you will just not 1:15:16.640 --> 1:15:18.040 believe how he says that. 1:15:18.520 --> 1:15:20.920 He says it like it's his only line in the film. 1:15:21.320 --> 1:15:27.320 Yeah. Yeah, Anyway, later we learned that Marina has been 1:15:27.439 --> 1:15:30.120 framed for the murder of her teacher, and the four 1:15:30.160 --> 1:15:33.800 heroes decide that they've got to work together. Ooh, and 1:15:33.880 --> 1:15:36.400 then here's where we get that great ludicrous scene where 1:15:36.439 --> 1:15:41.240 Jeremy Irons punishes Bruce Payne for letting them escape, so 1:15:41.360 --> 1:15:46.200 he puts CGI snakes in Bruce Payne's ears. I don't know, 1:15:46.200 --> 1:15:48.880 how would you describe the parasite implantation scene? 1:15:48.960 --> 1:15:52.160 Yeah, I don't know. Weird CGI creature. I'm not sure 1:15:52.200 --> 1:15:55.720 how it gets in exactly, Like does he shove in 1:15:55.760 --> 1:15:56.200 his mouth. 1:15:57.120 --> 1:15:59.439 He's like zaps it into him somehow. But then we 1:15:59.439 --> 1:16:03.000 see it like running around underneath his skin, and then 1:16:03.120 --> 1:16:05.240 it comes up to his ears and his ears get 1:16:05.240 --> 1:16:08.040 all swollen, and then the snakes pop out of his 1:16:08.120 --> 1:16:10.160 ears and he looks unhappy. 1:16:10.760 --> 1:16:14.080 Yeah, as far as I know, this is not something. 1:16:14.120 --> 1:16:16.000 It may be something in D and D. There are 1:16:16.000 --> 1:16:17.400 a lot of creatures in D and D, and this 1:16:17.479 --> 1:16:19.759 is not what I'm familiar with it in any case. 1:16:20.640 --> 1:16:23.559 But I mean, the CGI is not the best, but 1:16:23.640 --> 1:16:26.400 it's also not the worst, even by this movie's standards. 1:16:26.439 --> 1:16:30.680 It and pain does a good job selling like the 1:16:30.720 --> 1:16:35.040 otherworldly pain of having this creature inside his head. And 1:16:35.120 --> 1:16:38.600 I have to say you included a very nice screenshot 1:16:38.640 --> 1:16:41.519 here where Jeremy Irons is looming behind him and you 1:16:41.600 --> 1:16:47.479 have these like the osuary constructures like crowning his head, 1:16:47.680 --> 1:16:51.800 like horns of like skeletal horns. It's it's really cool. 1:16:52.080 --> 1:16:56.240 Yeah. Oh yeah, another actually great interior location here, but yeah, 1:16:56.280 --> 1:16:58.240 for a ridiculous scene. 1:16:58.439 --> 1:17:01.360 And it's like he's being with a fate worse than 1:17:01.439 --> 1:17:03.439 death for like a minor screw up. 1:17:03.840 --> 1:17:06.400 Yeah yeah. 1:17:06.479 --> 1:17:06.639 Oh. 1:17:06.680 --> 1:17:10.120 We also learned here that the Impress's tracker Norda, is 1:17:10.160 --> 1:17:12.400 in pursuit of the scroll as well. So this is 1:17:12.479 --> 1:17:15.240 how we're gonna work what seems like a ranger character. 1:17:14.920 --> 1:17:17.559 In Yeah, yeah, she's a ranger, and he's like, just 1:17:17.600 --> 1:17:20.400 follow her. This just got a lot easier. Also, that's 1:17:20.479 --> 1:17:22.200 that's the whine I put the snake in your head 1:17:22.240 --> 1:17:23.839 so we can follow the tracker. 1:17:25.000 --> 1:17:27.479 So now we go to a bar, which is basically 1:17:27.520 --> 1:17:30.760 the most icedly canteena scene. We just see a lot 1:17:30.840 --> 1:17:33.200 of people, a lot of different kinds of creatures running 1:17:33.200 --> 1:17:37.400 around drinking, you know, zany antics, people just dancing, just 1:17:37.439 --> 1:17:39.439 kind of dancing like they're at a club kind of. 1:17:39.600 --> 1:17:43.320 It doesn't necessarily look like the medieval aesthetic of a 1:17:43.400 --> 1:17:44.880 dance dance going on. 1:17:45.120 --> 1:17:48.200 It's a weird scene because some of the creatures just 1:17:48.240 --> 1:17:51.519 look like dudes in face paint. Others look like like 1:17:51.800 --> 1:17:55.439 serious attempts to create something like goblins or orcs. Yeah, 1:17:55.479 --> 1:17:58.280 and others look like they jumped off the page of 1:17:58.400 --> 1:18:00.200 the Garden of Earthly Delights, you know. 1:18:00.320 --> 1:18:03.360 Yes, yeah, yeah. This is also the scene where they're 1:18:03.360 --> 1:18:05.559 trying to figure out how much chicken they can fit 1:18:05.600 --> 1:18:06.599 in Elwood's beard. 1:18:06.960 --> 1:18:09.320 Yes, and the answer is a lot. 1:18:09.720 --> 1:18:13.240 Yeah. So he's trying to tell stories while he's eating 1:18:13.360 --> 1:18:15.880 like a chicken hole. You know, that's the joke like 1:18:16.040 --> 1:18:17.840 you just take the whole chicken and shove it in 1:18:17.880 --> 1:18:21.800 your face. But they seem so Our heroes seem to 1:18:21.840 --> 1:18:24.080 have arrived at a consensus that they can find the 1:18:24.160 --> 1:18:28.360 rod of Savrial themselves and that they need to do this. 1:18:28.520 --> 1:18:30.800 And this appeals to Marina because she's going to be 1:18:30.840 --> 1:18:33.559 able to clear her name. And then the others are 1:18:33.600 --> 1:18:36.599 tempted by the idea of a financial reward from the 1:18:36.600 --> 1:18:39.720 Empress when they deliver it to her. And there's a 1:18:39.760 --> 1:18:44.559 lot more banter and open mouth chewing related comedy. I 1:18:44.640 --> 1:18:47.200 was trying to think. Major takeaways from the scene are, like, 1:18:47.600 --> 1:18:53.280 there's class antagonism. Marina insults Ridley and Snails for being criminals, 1:18:53.800 --> 1:18:56.200 and they try to explain to her the concept of 1:18:56.280 --> 1:19:00.120 honor among thieves. That's where this comes in. She's like, well, 1:19:00.160 --> 1:19:05.240 commoners really are common it seems, and Elwood wants gold 1:19:05.280 --> 1:19:11.439 and chicken, and so it becomes clear that Ridley has 1:19:11.479 --> 1:19:14.760 a crush on Marina. Uh oh, So they kind of 1:19:14.840 --> 1:19:17.920 even though they argue, they don't part ways, they're kind 1:19:17.920 --> 1:19:19.800 of drawn together and they figure out how to do 1:19:19.880 --> 1:19:24.840 some kind of magic teleportation into inside the scroll. I 1:19:24.840 --> 1:19:27.880 don't remember exactly what's going on there. But also in 1:19:27.920 --> 1:19:31.439 the scene, Snails meets Norda, the Empress's ranger. You know, 1:19:31.479 --> 1:19:36.120 she's very very kind of stoic and keeps the cards 1:19:36.160 --> 1:19:38.800 close to the chest. But he goes up and tries 1:19:38.840 --> 1:19:41.559 to buy her some wine and like whispers to the bartender, 1:19:41.640 --> 1:19:46.200 like make it your cheapest wine. But then this scene 1:19:46.320 --> 1:19:48.760 is ended when Damadar and his soldiers show up. And 1:19:48.800 --> 1:19:50.719 this is going to be a pattern throughout the film 1:19:50.840 --> 1:19:54.600 where there's just like a scene that ends because Damodar 1:19:54.800 --> 1:19:57.360 arrives that just happens over and over and over. 1:19:57.800 --> 1:20:00.320 Yes, I mean it's not the worst structure have I 1:20:00.320 --> 1:20:03.799 guess in a story, but but yeah, it is definitely 1:20:03.800 --> 1:20:04.280 the pattern. 1:20:04.600 --> 1:20:08.240 Elwood cleverly covers their escape by flipping over a table 1:20:08.320 --> 1:20:12.160 and shouting bar fight yeah, which and everyone obeys. 1:20:12.360 --> 1:20:15.639 Yeah. 1:20:15.680 --> 1:20:19.040 Anyway, later Ridley and Marina they teleport like back out 1:20:19.120 --> 1:20:21.479 of the scroll and now they know what the next 1:20:21.560 --> 1:20:23.800 leg of the quest is. Somehow they know that they've 1:20:23.800 --> 1:20:26.960 got to get into the Temple of Dragons so they 1:20:26.960 --> 1:20:29.200 can get the rod. And to get into the Temple 1:20:29.240 --> 1:20:32.080 of Dragons, they've got to have a magic artifact called 1:20:32.120 --> 1:20:36.000 the Eye of the Dragon, which is held by Zylas, 1:20:36.080 --> 1:20:38.639 the boss of the Thieves Guild in a different city 1:20:38.880 --> 1:20:41.519 called Antius. You catch all that you're getting all these details. 1:20:41.560 --> 1:20:43.559 Are you supposed to write this on the back of 1:20:43.600 --> 1:20:45.920 your character sheet. I mean you can refer back to 1:20:46.000 --> 1:20:48.200 it and then check them off as you get them. 1:20:48.200 --> 1:20:49.559 It's like, Okay, first we got to get the one, 1:20:49.600 --> 1:20:50.439 and then we need to get. 1:20:50.439 --> 1:20:53.519 Okay, yeah, so that's where they're going next. And then 1:20:53.560 --> 1:20:56.479 they show like a couple of the nicest looking things 1:20:56.479 --> 1:21:00.280 in the movie are just random, like zoomed out location shot. 1:21:01.120 --> 1:21:04.479 So there's one going going into Antius that doesn't look 1:21:04.520 --> 1:21:06.880 too bad. That's like, it's kind of interesting. It's like 1:21:06.920 --> 1:21:10.840 showing these big kind of castle fortified castles up on 1:21:10.880 --> 1:21:14.160 these spires of rock rising above a valley with bridges 1:21:14.200 --> 1:21:15.160 spanning out to them. 1:21:15.360 --> 1:21:17.680 Yeah, it looks really cool. I don't really get the 1:21:17.720 --> 1:21:20.200 sense that the place we then go to is in 1:21:20.240 --> 1:21:23.160 fact this location. No, it doesn't look like it, but 1:21:23.240 --> 1:21:25.559 would have been neat to go there. There's a lot 1:21:25.600 --> 1:21:27.719 of goofing around. When our heroes arrive. 1:21:27.840 --> 1:21:30.200 They go to the marketplace and they just see weird 1:21:30.240 --> 1:21:32.760 people and creatures and it's like, oh, I'm you know, 1:21:32.800 --> 1:21:35.719 I'm getting distracted from our mission by various things. 1:21:35.880 --> 1:21:39.360 Yeah. Our mage momentarily looks at some jewelry that's being 1:21:39.400 --> 1:21:41.400 sold by a vendor, and the dwarf says, if I 1:21:41.400 --> 1:21:43.240 don't get to drink, you don't get to shop. 1:21:43.920 --> 1:21:47.480 And I'm like, oh my god, oh boy. And eventually 1:21:47.520 --> 1:21:49.960 they talk their way into a meeting with Zilas at 1:21:49.960 --> 1:21:53.840 the Thieves Guild played by Richard O'Brien and Marina. When 1:21:53.840 --> 1:21:56.400 they go in, Marina says to Justin Whalen, She's like, so, 1:21:56.479 --> 1:21:59.080 this is it, right, everything a thief strives for? And 1:21:59.160 --> 1:22:03.080 Ridley says, yea, yeah, So what a thief strives for 1:22:03.320 --> 1:22:07.840 is to live in like a baroque salon with purple walls, 1:22:08.120 --> 1:22:12.439 gold furniture, rugs and pillows everywhere, and lots of weird 1:22:12.520 --> 1:22:15.840 people lounging about in various states of dress, and also 1:22:15.880 --> 1:22:17.200 somebody to feed you grapes. 1:22:17.920 --> 1:22:21.240 Yeah, and he really. Richard O'Brien's character comes off more 1:22:21.280 --> 1:22:23.760 as like King of the Circus as opposed to like 1:22:23.920 --> 1:22:24.839 Prince of Thiefs. 1:22:25.200 --> 1:22:29.200 Yeah, yeah, I agree, there's there is a showbiz element 1:22:29.320 --> 1:22:33.400 to him that doesn't quite feel like the Thieves Guild. 1:22:34.000 --> 1:22:37.599 Yeah. Yeah, everything feels a little off with this character 1:22:37.640 --> 1:22:40.640 and this presentation and this whole scene. Again, none of 1:22:40.640 --> 1:22:42.880 this is like Richard O'Brien's fault. It's just I don't know, 1:22:42.920 --> 1:22:45.320 things didn't come together right. And then we also have 1:22:45.360 --> 1:22:49.880 that weird purple headed guy. Yeah, and the eye with 1:22:49.960 --> 1:22:54.120 the third eye, and also just like some very like 1:22:54.240 --> 1:22:58.880 strong overacting underteaeth, all that makeup that was just distracting 1:22:59.160 --> 1:23:01.160 every time he was on this. I was just trying 1:23:01.160 --> 1:23:03.439 to figure out what choices led us to this. 1:23:03.960 --> 1:23:07.320 So thoughts on Richard O'Brien's performance. He's not hamming it 1:23:07.439 --> 1:23:10.879 up with quite the rocket fuel intensity of Jeremy Irons, 1:23:11.200 --> 1:23:13.479 but I think he is having fun with this goofy roll. 1:23:13.600 --> 1:23:18.000 He's sort of a pale, greasy human eel version of 1:23:18.120 --> 1:23:21.599 Job of the Hut, but he's got this like wide 1:23:21.760 --> 1:23:26.599 ingratiating smile. He does some casual sexual harassment of Marina. 1:23:26.920 --> 1:23:29.679 He's a little off and he makes some vaguely threatening 1:23:29.720 --> 1:23:35.440 comments at them, but then eventually a deal emerges. He's like, Okay, 1:23:35.479 --> 1:23:38.760 there's a thing called the Antius Guild Maze. It's sort 1:23:38.760 --> 1:23:42.160 of a deadly obstacle course full of traps, and if 1:23:42.240 --> 1:23:44.040 Ridley can make it through, he's going to get the 1:23:44.120 --> 1:23:47.639 Dragon's Eye. And Okay, they make a deal, So I'm 1:23:47.680 --> 1:23:51.000 not going to narrate solving the maze, but anyway, Justin 1:23:51.040 --> 1:23:53.920 Whalen has to solve and avoid some Indiana Jones traps 1:23:53.960 --> 1:23:55.559 to get the prize at the end of the course. 1:23:56.200 --> 1:23:59.320 And I wonder if this maybe British listeners can chime 1:23:59.400 --> 1:24:01.439 in on this. I wonder if this whole thing is 1:24:01.439 --> 1:24:04.920 a reference to the Crystal Mayze game show that I 1:24:04.960 --> 1:24:07.200 know Richard O'Brien was one of the hosts of. 1:24:07.720 --> 1:24:09.519 Oh I know nothing of that. 1:24:09.760 --> 1:24:11.639 I mean, it's certainly nothing I've ever seen, but I'm 1:24:11.680 --> 1:24:15.280 just familiar with it from being familiar with Richard O'Brien's 1:24:15.280 --> 1:24:16.160 work over the years. 1:24:16.640 --> 1:24:19.040 Now, at the end of this whole sequence, Zilas tries 1:24:19.080 --> 1:24:22.479 to betray them. So it seems the prize that Justin 1:24:22.479 --> 1:24:25.040 Whalen retrieved from the end of the maze was the 1:24:25.160 --> 1:24:28.639 artifact that he wanted and Xilas has never been able 1:24:28.640 --> 1:24:30.960 to get this out of the maze before, so he 1:24:31.000 --> 1:24:33.800 tries to steal it from Ridley, but they are interrupted 1:24:33.800 --> 1:24:37.360 by the arrival of Damadar once again, once again, and 1:24:37.479 --> 1:24:40.320 yet again, a big fight breaks out and our heroes 1:24:40.439 --> 1:24:44.040 except for Marina, are able to escape because of the fight, 1:24:44.080 --> 1:24:56.280 and Marina gets captured. Later, our heroes regroup in the 1:24:56.320 --> 1:24:59.360 woods and they are caught by Norda, the ranger, the 1:24:59.400 --> 1:25:02.760 tracker who works for the Impress. Here's where you get 1:25:02.800 --> 1:25:05.000 a good look at her armor, and it's funny. It's 1:25:05.040 --> 1:25:09.800 like very reflective, I don't know, it's like glinting even 1:25:09.880 --> 1:25:11.600 in the dark of the forest. 1:25:11.840 --> 1:25:15.000 Yeah, very form fitting plate armor. And if you've ever 1:25:15.240 --> 1:25:19.559 seen any fantasy illustration of a female woman in armor, 1:25:19.600 --> 1:25:21.280 you know exactly what they're going for here. 1:25:21.960 --> 1:25:24.599 So she's trying to arrest them and take them back, 1:25:24.880 --> 1:25:28.040 take them and the scroll back to the Empress. But 1:25:28.400 --> 1:25:32.640 in this encounter instead she learns of the treachery of Profion, 1:25:32.760 --> 1:25:35.320 and then she reports back to thora Birch via a 1:25:35.360 --> 1:25:39.400 magical zoom call, and the Empress commands in Orda to 1:25:39.680 --> 1:25:42.919 instead work together with these people and seek out Damodar 1:25:43.040 --> 1:25:45.799 and acquire the rod. You must get the rod. Everybody 1:25:45.800 --> 1:25:49.080 wants the rod. So Norda is now on the same 1:25:49.160 --> 1:25:53.559 team as our heroes. Now Marina, of course, has been captured, 1:25:53.600 --> 1:25:57.080 and there's like an interrogation scene where Bruce Payne comes 1:25:57.080 --> 1:26:00.679 in with his blue lips and he's like, you know, ooh, 1:26:00.720 --> 1:26:03.200 I don't necessarily want to overthrow the Empress, but I 1:26:03.200 --> 1:26:05.880 have no choice. I've got ear snakes and she's like. 1:26:06.240 --> 1:26:08.200 He's like, can you help me? And she says no, 1:26:08.240 --> 1:26:10.880 I don't know how to help you. And then he 1:26:10.920 --> 1:26:15.519 gets real mad and he says he's like, well, I 1:26:15.520 --> 1:26:17.800 can suck the information I need out of your brain 1:26:17.880 --> 1:26:20.479 with my ear snakes, and then he does it. He 1:26:20.520 --> 1:26:22.759 gets the info he needs, which I think was basically 1:26:22.840 --> 1:26:25.760 like where are you going? Yeah, and then we're back 1:26:25.800 --> 1:26:28.479 with our heroes in Noorda where they're continuing their journey. 1:26:28.479 --> 1:26:30.879 We eventually find out they're going to come rescue Marina, 1:26:31.520 --> 1:26:33.920 and this is where you get that exchange between Norda 1:26:33.960 --> 1:26:35.920 and Snails where it's like, how old are you? I'm 1:26:35.960 --> 1:26:37.080 two hundred and thirty four? 1:26:37.520 --> 1:26:39.599 Yeah, yeah, reasonably good joke there. 1:26:40.200 --> 1:26:42.839 So it's time for rescue. They get to the fortress 1:26:42.920 --> 1:26:45.439 where Marina is being held, and Snails and Ridley sneak 1:26:45.479 --> 1:26:47.880 in with the grappling hooks. This is the part where 1:26:47.880 --> 1:26:53.040 they say Ridley look beholders, and then there's just like 1:26:53.080 --> 1:26:55.679 a long shot with like there are some vaguely purple 1:26:55.720 --> 1:26:59.280 looking things in the distance, Like what those the purple blobs? 1:26:59.320 --> 1:26:59.760 Way far? 1:27:00.800 --> 1:27:04.040 Yeah, I mean it almost feels like like the digital 1:27:04.080 --> 1:27:05.760 team was like, you know, we can we can throw 1:27:05.760 --> 1:27:07.479 some beholders into one of these scenes and you can 1:27:07.520 --> 1:27:09.880 do some added voiceover about it, and they're like, yeah, 1:27:09.960 --> 1:27:14.839 let's do it. But it's beholders. If you're not familiar 1:27:14.920 --> 1:27:19.839 with them, listeners. These are hideous, floating head like beings 1:27:20.320 --> 1:27:24.840 with numerous eyes on stalks and one central eye. They're 1:27:24.840 --> 1:27:29.320 incredibly dangerous creatures to run into in a Dungeons and 1:27:29.360 --> 1:27:33.680 Dragons campaign. They're they're very evil, they're like super paranoid. 1:27:34.439 --> 1:27:35.559 They don't do. 1:27:35.439 --> 1:27:38.720 Grunt work guarding castles. Uh. There are some other like 1:27:38.760 --> 1:27:41.599 beholder related creatures like spectators that I guess you could 1:27:41.600 --> 1:27:44.040 maybe have in that role, but beholders are not doing 1:27:44.080 --> 1:27:47.320 that work. Beholders are not going to just be casually encountered. 1:27:47.720 --> 1:27:50.560 And more to the point, they're like there's like central 1:27:50.880 --> 1:27:54.960 Dungeons and Dragons ip, like these are things that that 1:27:54.960 --> 1:27:59.600 that they're almost instantly recognizable as dungeons and dragons creations, 1:27:59.640 --> 1:28:02.840 so kind of I mean, it's kind of neat that 1:28:02.880 --> 1:28:05.799 they're included as a as an easter egg here, I guess. 1:28:05.800 --> 1:28:09.880 But also just they totally don't make the most out 1:28:09.920 --> 1:28:10.960 of a beholder appearance. 1:28:11.479 --> 1:28:14.759 Yeah, nobody fights one. They like throw a bone essentially 1:28:14.840 --> 1:28:17.840 to make one run off after it, and then they 1:28:17.880 --> 1:28:22.680 sneak in the Then our two rogues split up. Snails 1:28:22.720 --> 1:28:26.679 goes into Damodar's room and he gets he falls into 1:28:26.800 --> 1:28:31.080 like a pit of quicksand disguised as a rug. Is 1:28:31.120 --> 1:28:34.479 this something from D and D It may very well be. 1:28:34.640 --> 1:28:37.479 I did like the effect here, because oh yeah, this 1:28:37.560 --> 1:28:39.479 is a practical effect. They did some sort of like 1:28:39.520 --> 1:28:42.919 a painting on top of a like a movie quicksand situation, 1:28:43.400 --> 1:28:44.559 and he sinks into it. 1:28:45.000 --> 1:28:47.720 So I did like this, Yeah, I thought it looked good. 1:28:48.040 --> 1:28:50.000 He sinks into a bunch of oatmeal and his gross 1:28:50.040 --> 1:28:53.559 looking and then of course Damodar comes in and attacks Snails. 1:28:54.080 --> 1:28:58.160 He says something like he's like just like all thieves, 1:28:58.280 --> 1:29:03.280 always taking things that don't BELI long to you, like, 1:29:03.320 --> 1:29:05.280 that's a really good dig against a thief. 1:29:05.640 --> 1:29:08.240 It's true. It's true though, they're always doing it. 1:29:10.200 --> 1:29:13.000 And they fight, and you know, Snails before he's always 1:29:13.040 --> 1:29:15.479 being cowardly. He actually gets some good slashes in on 1:29:15.600 --> 1:29:19.080 Damadar and then he runs away and then we see 1:29:19.120 --> 1:29:24.360 Damadar like pursuing him at a steady march like Jason Vorhees. Meanwhile, 1:29:24.479 --> 1:29:27.800 Ridley rescues Marina from a dungeon. They fight their way out. 1:29:28.240 --> 1:29:31.280 We get one of those scenes where so many movies 1:29:31.320 --> 1:29:34.479 in the nineties like this, a scene where the girl 1:29:34.600 --> 1:29:37.519 hits a guard with a stick and the boy says nice, 1:29:39.200 --> 1:29:42.519 you know, and then you gotta have that. And then 1:29:42.800 --> 1:29:46.519 Damodar corners Snails at a dead end on the castle 1:29:46.560 --> 1:29:50.120 grounds and they fight and his brutal Damadar beats him 1:29:50.200 --> 1:29:53.519 up and like breaks his bones. We hear bones cracking 1:29:53.560 --> 1:29:56.559 and crunching, and then Ridley and Marina show up to 1:29:56.600 --> 1:30:00.880 the rescue and I was like, okay, okay, Snail's gonna 1:30:00.880 --> 1:30:03.120 be okay, They're gonna help him, and then nope, he 1:30:03.240 --> 1:30:06.639 just gets murdered. Damadar kills him. Like this is off 1:30:06.800 --> 1:30:09.360 tone something I don't know. It didn't feel like that 1:30:09.400 --> 1:30:10.280 was supposed to happen. 1:30:11.280 --> 1:30:14.000 Yeah, yeah, the tone on this choice is a little off, 1:30:14.080 --> 1:30:19.360 but yeah, kills him dead and you know, ending possibilities 1:30:19.400 --> 1:30:23.839 aside like he's super dead, he mostly stays dead also. 1:30:24.600 --> 1:30:27.599 Then then Bruce Payne stabs Ridley with the sword, and 1:30:27.640 --> 1:30:29.759 just when he's about to finish him off, Marina saves 1:30:29.800 --> 1:30:32.519 the day by zapping Damodar with pink magic and then 1:30:32.560 --> 1:30:35.880 teleporting them away to somewhere else once again. Yes, so 1:30:35.920 --> 1:30:40.800 that encounters over rip Snails. There's a brief interlude where 1:30:40.800 --> 1:30:42.799 we get to see the Empress giving a very wooden 1:30:42.840 --> 1:30:46.759 speech at the Mage's Council about the people and about 1:30:46.760 --> 1:30:50.519 Profion's treachery, and she says she says Profion is trying 1:30:50.520 --> 1:30:53.800 to take all the power for himself. Profion accuses her 1:30:53.880 --> 1:30:56.599 of the same. They go back and forth, and it's 1:30:56.680 --> 1:31:00.280 weird energy because it's like Jeremy Iron's frothing at the 1:31:00.320 --> 1:31:02.520 mouth versus an introverted teenager. 1:31:03.120 --> 1:31:07.080 Yeah, this scene just I mean, Jeremy Irons is super 1:31:07.120 --> 1:31:09.960 amusing as always, but yeah, I just felt bad for 1:31:10.000 --> 1:31:13.280 thora Birch because like this, it just feels like like 1:31:13.520 --> 1:31:16.920 two completely different planets of acting going on here, and 1:31:17.600 --> 1:31:18.799 she doesn't look comfortable. 1:31:19.320 --> 1:31:23.200 Elsewhere, our heroes reach their destination. This is the part 1:31:23.200 --> 1:31:25.000 where I'm saying it's one of the best looking things 1:31:25.040 --> 1:31:27.840 in the movie. Kind of I'm not sure exactly what 1:31:27.920 --> 1:31:29.400 this is, but it looks to me like a hand 1:31:29.439 --> 1:31:32.920 painted background. It's basically, you know, it's like a big, 1:31:33.040 --> 1:31:36.639 drooping kind of giant tree with a bunch of glowing 1:31:36.760 --> 1:31:40.720 lights in it. It's a little bit Thomas Kincaidlothlauri and 1:31:40.800 --> 1:31:43.680 a little bit Ewok village on indoor, but with some 1:31:43.760 --> 1:31:46.760 dark magic. And it may be very pretty, but we 1:31:46.840 --> 1:31:50.240 are not ready to yub nub yet because the quest 1:31:50.320 --> 1:31:53.240 is not complete now. When they arrive, there's an elf 1:31:53.280 --> 1:31:56.160 played by Tom Baker with short blonde hair who heals 1:31:56.240 --> 1:31:59.920 Ridley by zappanim and then Tom Baker says a bunch 1:31:59.920 --> 1:32:03.160 of things. He says, he's just kind of talking out 1:32:03.160 --> 1:32:05.400 of nowhere. I don't think this is prompted by anything. 1:32:05.439 --> 1:32:08.720 He's like, the Elvin peoples do not require spells to 1:32:08.760 --> 1:32:12.439 work with magic. You use magic. We are part of it, 1:32:12.800 --> 1:32:17.519 as are all living creatures, including dragons. Sadly, humans see 1:32:17.560 --> 1:32:22.600 only their destructive powers. And then Ridley wakes up. He 1:32:22.640 --> 1:32:24.439 explains he had a bad dream where he saw a 1:32:24.560 --> 1:32:28.719 dragon being born, and then Tom Baker explains that magic 1:32:29.000 --> 1:32:32.000 is the life force of nature. He keeps everything around 1:32:32.040 --> 1:32:35.680 us alive, so if the dragons were to be destroyed, 1:32:36.040 --> 1:32:38.960 it would that would destroy the fabric of magic and 1:32:39.080 --> 1:32:42.599 with it all life. And at this point I was like, wait, 1:32:42.680 --> 1:32:48.040 who is this guy? Do they even say who he is? 1:32:49.200 --> 1:32:52.000 I was just so pleased that Tom Baker had finally 1:32:52.040 --> 1:32:56.680 shown up and there was some captivating acting happening on 1:32:56.720 --> 1:32:59.120 the screen. I was like, yeah, I trust you completely, 1:32:59.479 --> 1:33:02.040 whoever you are after. 1:33:01.200 --> 1:33:03.439 This, So of course Ridley is healed, and then there's 1:33:03.479 --> 1:33:05.639 that dark Knight of the Soul scene I mentioned earlier, 1:33:05.680 --> 1:33:08.679 where like Ridley and Marina are they're arguing about whether 1:33:08.800 --> 1:33:11.960 the Impress's plan to help the common people is worth 1:33:12.000 --> 1:33:16.200 putting faith in, and at one point Marina says that 1:33:16.600 --> 1:33:23.080 Ridley is what Snails died for. But also Marina says 1:33:23.120 --> 1:33:25.720 that she now understands why the common people, why non 1:33:25.840 --> 1:33:30.040 mages are worth fighting for, and then justin Waylen's like, 1:33:30.080 --> 1:33:32.519 you know, for a mage, you're pretty smart, and then 1:33:32.600 --> 1:33:36.080 big old kiss. But of course there's a little naked 1:33:36.080 --> 1:33:39.519 cgi demon looking on the methods there again, so we're 1:33:39.600 --> 1:33:42.479 gearing up for the final showdown. Our heroes are given 1:33:42.520 --> 1:33:45.479 some magical weapons. Ridley gets a silver sword and Elf 1:33:45.560 --> 1:33:48.479 says it will protect him. I do kind of like 1:33:48.520 --> 1:33:51.479 these costumes we see. I don't know who these elves are. 1:33:51.520 --> 1:33:53.559 I guess they're like wood elves of some sort, but 1:33:53.600 --> 1:33:56.719 they look like Texas chainsaw elves. They've got ed gain 1:33:56.880 --> 1:33:57.559 masks on. 1:33:57.960 --> 1:33:59.839 Yeah, they look a little disturbing. 1:34:00.040 --> 1:34:02.600 OK, this is it's weird that a lot of the 1:34:02.640 --> 1:34:05.519 best looking visual stuff and I'm not saying it's that great, 1:34:05.600 --> 1:34:07.640 but the best stuff is like hidden away in the 1:34:07.680 --> 1:34:10.439 final third of the movie, but we get a scene 1:34:10.479 --> 1:34:12.840 where Ridley has to go into a dungeon alone to 1:34:12.920 --> 1:34:16.680 retrieve the rod before Belloc, I mean before Damadar gets it. 1:34:17.400 --> 1:34:20.559 And he's attempted by many treasures in the treasure room, 1:34:20.600 --> 1:34:23.080 but then he thinks better of it before removing anything. 1:34:23.160 --> 1:34:25.800 So he's like, gonna steal some gold, but then he's like, no, 1:34:25.880 --> 1:34:27.519 I shouldn't do this. He puts it back down and 1:34:27.520 --> 1:34:30.320 he says sorry snails, like snails would have wanted me 1:34:30.400 --> 1:34:35.240 to steal this. But he talks to a skeleton covered 1:34:35.240 --> 1:34:40.280 in cobwebs who identifies himself as sav Reel, the creator 1:34:40.479 --> 1:34:44.439 of the rod. Oh yeah, Now he says, be warned, 1:34:44.600 --> 1:34:47.200 anyone who wields the power of the Rod must suffer 1:34:47.240 --> 1:34:51.640 a horrible fate. And I think he says that the 1:34:51.760 --> 1:34:55.760 Rod must be destroyed or it's wielder will be destroyed. 1:34:56.760 --> 1:34:59.600 And then like absolutely out of nowhere, we just like 1:34:59.680 --> 1:35:02.519 cut to Jeremy Irons back in the city, back in 1:35:02.560 --> 1:35:05.080 some doll and he's screeching. The Impress has called out 1:35:05.080 --> 1:35:08.559 to dragons upon us. We see the dragons flying through 1:35:08.600 --> 1:35:12.960 the sky and attacking the tower. He's like, destroy them. 1:35:13.280 --> 1:35:16.040 So here we kind of go into action movie mode. 1:35:16.120 --> 1:35:18.200 A lot of the rest of the movie is just 1:35:18.320 --> 1:35:23.080 people fighting cgi dragons, people shooting giant ballistas at them, 1:35:23.160 --> 1:35:28.000 zapping them with magic, buildings exploding with dragonfire, and dragons 1:35:28.120 --> 1:35:31.439 versus dragons. There's like one part where a dragon gets 1:35:31.560 --> 1:35:33.400 zapped and it falls out of the sky and it 1:35:33.439 --> 1:35:36.080 gets impaled on a spire on top of a tower. 1:35:36.200 --> 1:35:39.080 The camera really lingers on this and it looks bad. 1:35:39.680 --> 1:35:42.120 And then of course a bunch of people are fighting 1:35:42.160 --> 1:35:45.400 for control of the Rod. So like Ridley brings it 1:35:45.439 --> 1:35:48.280 out of the dungeon, then Damodar steals it from Ridley 1:35:48.320 --> 1:35:52.759 in company. Then Ridley escapes and his friends they portal 1:35:52.840 --> 1:35:55.479 back to where Damodar is and then they steal the 1:35:55.520 --> 1:35:56.720 rod back from Profion. 1:35:57.400 --> 1:35:59.920 Now is it just one point each time you acquire 1:35:59.920 --> 1:36:02.800 the rod? Or how does the scoring work? 1:36:02.800 --> 1:36:06.080 Here? Very good question? Yeah, how does the experience? They're 1:36:06.120 --> 1:36:08.360 really racking up a lot of XP at the very 1:36:08.479 --> 1:36:11.519 end here. And so there's a final fight that's like 1:36:11.600 --> 1:36:15.479 Ridley versus Profion, And there is a line where Jeremy 1:36:15.520 --> 1:36:21.960 Irons says, not so talented. Hey, mister Ridley, I think 1:36:22.200 --> 1:36:24.599 the movie The Talented Mister Ripley had just come out 1:36:24.640 --> 1:36:25.760 like the year before. 1:36:26.040 --> 1:36:31.080 Yes, yeah, nineteen ninety nine. Yeah, solid movie. Always always 1:36:31.120 --> 1:36:33.479 a gamble to reference a better movie in your movie. 1:36:33.680 --> 1:36:38.439 Yeah, So Ridley is Ridley gets hold of the rod 1:36:38.439 --> 1:36:40.680 at one point and he's like, okay, now I'm going 1:36:40.720 --> 1:36:42.920 to use the rod. That's been the whole point of 1:36:42.960 --> 1:36:44.400 the story. We got to get the rod so we 1:36:44.439 --> 1:36:47.120 can use it against Profion. But then he has a 1:36:47.240 --> 1:36:49.960 tempted by the ring moment he like holds it up 1:36:49.960 --> 1:36:52.080 and you can see him grinning with all the power 1:36:52.120 --> 1:36:54.320 he has. Now it's like flowing into him, and he 1:36:54.320 --> 1:36:58.360 looks at the dragons and you see him realizing what's happening, 1:36:58.400 --> 1:37:01.280 that he's being tempted, and he turns away from the 1:37:01.320 --> 1:37:03.559 power of the ring or from the power of the rod, 1:37:04.000 --> 1:37:06.600 and he refuses it. He says, I won't become you, 1:37:07.600 --> 1:37:10.880 referring to Profion, and then he smashes the rod with 1:37:10.960 --> 1:37:11.559 his sword. 1:37:12.080 --> 1:37:14.000 Foolishly. I thought he was going to give in for 1:37:14.040 --> 1:37:17.479 a second there, and I was like this, that there's 1:37:17.520 --> 1:37:19.920 more to this kid than I thought. Maybe he's got 1:37:20.000 --> 1:37:21.920 it in him. No, he doesn't have it in him. 1:37:22.240 --> 1:37:26.559 So anyway, he smashes it and then they're still fighting Profion. 1:37:26.600 --> 1:37:29.519 At one point, Profion summons a I think like a 1:37:29.560 --> 1:37:32.520 ghost bone dragon to attack the Empress. 1:37:33.120 --> 1:37:34.920 It just kind of like climbs on her back and 1:37:35.040 --> 1:37:36.040 makes her squat down. 1:37:36.520 --> 1:37:41.680 Yeah, but the Empress uses her gold scepter against Profion, 1:37:42.280 --> 1:37:44.920 and that like makes all the gold dragons that are 1:37:44.960 --> 1:37:48.080 flying around to come and eat Profion, like one eats him, 1:37:48.120 --> 1:37:49.960 like the t rex eats the guy off the toilet. 1:37:51.160 --> 1:37:54.439 And going back to our earlier discussion, yes, it does 1:37:54.479 --> 1:37:58.000 make sense that she would command gold dragons instead of 1:37:58.040 --> 1:38:00.800 red dragons because gold dragons are good, red dragons are bad. 1:38:01.280 --> 1:38:05.040 But also I mean dragons and dungeons. Dragons are not 1:38:05.120 --> 1:38:09.280 just you know, you know, beasts, they're highly intelligent. So 1:38:09.560 --> 1:38:11.120 there's a whole discussion we could have here. 1:38:11.439 --> 1:38:14.120 Yeah, they're treated more like beasts here, like you just 1:38:14.200 --> 1:38:16.360 kind of bossom around and they do what you say, 1:38:17.240 --> 1:38:19.599 and then the dragons fly away in the end, and 1:38:19.640 --> 1:38:22.360 now it seems like everything's good, you know, every all 1:38:22.400 --> 1:38:26.280 the problems are fixed. We get we're like cutting away 1:38:26.400 --> 1:38:29.280 and then we see we don't even see off screen. 1:38:29.479 --> 1:38:32.479 We hear the Impress in voiceover saying, this is a 1:38:32.560 --> 1:38:36.800 direct quote people of ismir, I do declare that you 1:38:36.880 --> 1:38:40.120 are now all equal. Let the celebration begin. 1:38:42.920 --> 1:38:46.280 That easy, Yeah, and then they were good. 1:38:46.640 --> 1:38:48.160 Why didn't you say that from the beginning? 1:38:48.320 --> 1:38:54.040 Yeah, So here's a question. How many levels do you 1:38:54.080 --> 1:38:58.760 think these characters accrued during the during the run of 1:38:58.800 --> 1:39:01.320 the film here, because they feel like they start off 1:39:01.360 --> 1:39:06.439 at like level two and maybe cap it around level three. 1:39:07.360 --> 1:39:09.599 I don't feel like there's a tremendous amount of growth. 1:39:10.320 --> 1:39:12.439 That's funny. I was gonna say. I was going to 1:39:12.479 --> 1:39:14.920 say they spend most of the movie at level two 1:39:15.200 --> 1:39:17.720 and then in the last ten minutes they go from 1:39:17.800 --> 1:39:19.440 level two to level nine. 1:39:19.960 --> 1:39:22.040 Oh yeah, well, I mean they get some some high 1:39:22.080 --> 1:39:24.160 power magical weapons, that's for sure. 1:39:24.680 --> 1:39:28.240 Do we ever see our magic users learning additional spells? 1:39:28.360 --> 1:39:29.040 I don't think so. 1:39:29.439 --> 1:39:31.920 Do we see them throw dust around? 1:39:32.720 --> 1:39:33.200 They play? 1:39:33.400 --> 1:39:35.200 I mean, at least there are some spell components in 1:39:35.200 --> 1:39:38.040 the mix, but that's about all we see. I don't 1:39:38.040 --> 1:39:39.719 think we think we see any magical books. 1:39:39.760 --> 1:39:40.439 Really do we. 1:39:40.560 --> 1:39:43.479 See anybody reading from a tone of magic or a scroll? 1:39:45.560 --> 1:39:48.639 Not that I recall, and certainly not to learn a spell. 1:39:48.680 --> 1:39:50.920 I mean there is a library full of scrolls at 1:39:50.920 --> 1:39:51.400 the beginning. 1:39:51.479 --> 1:39:53.800 But yeah, I mean it can be disappointing if the 1:39:53.840 --> 1:39:57.640 prop department can't really meet your needs on that. I 1:39:57.720 --> 1:40:00.599 mentioned the Color of Magic earlier in the in the picture, 1:40:00.640 --> 1:40:03.280 which has a great cast, and of course I love 1:40:03.320 --> 1:40:06.679 the work of Terry Pratchett. But as memory serves, there's 1:40:06.720 --> 1:40:11.120 a magical book that shows up in that picture that 1:40:11.160 --> 1:40:13.920 they just didn't make it look believable enough for me 1:40:14.479 --> 1:40:17.200 to be like a tome of ancient magic, Like it 1:40:17.240 --> 1:40:20.040 looks like they were really rushed creating it. So it's 1:40:20.080 --> 1:40:21.960 kind of a gamble there. You got. The props department 1:40:22.000 --> 1:40:24.840 has to be able to meet you on any of 1:40:24.880 --> 1:40:25.880 these requests. For sure. 1:40:26.000 --> 1:40:28.160 It's just a paperback of how to win friends and 1:40:28.200 --> 1:40:31.720 influence people. Yeah. Oh, but we also alluded to this. 1:40:31.760 --> 1:40:33.599 There's some kind of code. There's some kind of happy 1:40:33.640 --> 1:40:36.439 coda where they go to Snails's grave and then they 1:40:36.479 --> 1:40:39.120 like put the ruby on it and it lights up, 1:40:39.520 --> 1:40:42.479 and then it's like, oh, Snails is still alive if 1:40:42.520 --> 1:40:45.320 we go somewhere else and then they turn into they 1:40:45.320 --> 1:40:47.120 turn into magic and fly away. 1:40:47.280 --> 1:40:49.000 I mean it is true in Dungeons and Dragons, there's 1:40:49.000 --> 1:40:51.360 always a way to bring a character back. You know, 1:40:51.439 --> 1:40:55.320 it's a multiverse. There are all sorts of resurrection spells. 1:40:56.040 --> 1:40:59.040 There's no reason that a fun character needs to stay 1:40:59.040 --> 1:41:04.640 dead forever. So Snails will return, but actually he won't. 1:41:05.920 --> 1:41:08.519 But Snails could return. You could all go home and 1:41:08.680 --> 1:41:12.320 roll up a Snails and tell your dungeon master, Hey, 1:41:12.840 --> 1:41:17.760 I'm changing characters. Snails from two thousands Dungeons and Dragons 1:41:17.840 --> 1:41:19.200 is now Injuring. Our campaign. 1:41:19.760 --> 1:41:26.280 Our party is Snails profion. And I was gonna say 1:41:26.360 --> 1:41:28.720 l would, but like, what's the funny twist on it? 1:41:28.800 --> 1:41:31.800 Like what if Elwood became a vegetarian and he was 1:41:31.840 --> 1:41:34.280 always just getting Satan in his beard. 1:41:34.560 --> 1:41:39.599 Yeah, yeah, Satan and beats. Yeah, these are good choices 1:41:39.640 --> 1:41:41.400 to have. You know, you need choices like this for 1:41:41.479 --> 1:41:45.719 your your character. It gives you some stick to fall 1:41:45.760 --> 1:41:48.559 back on during all the small moments of a campaign. 1:41:49.360 --> 1:41:51.880 All right, Is that all we've got on Dungeons and 1:41:51.960 --> 1:41:53.639 Dragons two thousand for now? 1:41:53.800 --> 1:41:56.519 I mean, there's so much more we could say. Every 1:41:56.680 --> 1:42:01.240 scene with Jeremy Irons is like a masterclass in overacting 1:42:02.280 --> 1:42:06.320 and hamming it up. There are so many weird choices, 1:42:06.960 --> 1:42:10.320 digital effects that don't really come together, and yet at 1:42:10.360 --> 1:42:14.400 the same time some admirable practical effects, some admirable sets, 1:42:14.439 --> 1:42:19.519 and certainly some really cool interior locations. I would say 1:42:19.920 --> 1:42:22.040 this is not a movie for everyone. I'm not encouraging 1:42:22.080 --> 1:42:25.960 everyone to go out and watch this movie in its entirety, 1:42:26.240 --> 1:42:28.360 but everyone must see the first fifteen minutes. 1:42:28.800 --> 1:42:32.040 The Emperor has decreed. All right. 1:42:32.280 --> 1:42:36.040 So that is two thousands Dungeons and Dragons. I hope 1:42:36.080 --> 1:42:38.919 you enjoyed it. I think it was a solid choice 1:42:39.080 --> 1:42:42.240 for our two hundred film selection here on Weird House Cinema. 1:42:42.720 --> 1:42:45.200 So now we just have to chug on and eventually 1:42:45.280 --> 1:42:47.840 start thinking about the three hundredth film. 1:42:48.640 --> 1:42:50.320 We will not do the movie three hundred. 1:42:50.800 --> 1:42:54.280 We will not do three hundred. It's true, all right, 1:42:54.720 --> 1:42:56.479 So we're gonna gohea and close this episode out, but 1:42:56.520 --> 1:42:58.120 we'd love to hear from everyone out there. We know 1:42:58.200 --> 1:43:02.040 that there are multiple listeners who are Dungeons and Dragons enthusiasts, 1:43:02.080 --> 1:43:05.320 and you may have additional insight on what's happening and 1:43:05.320 --> 1:43:08.960 what's not happening in this film. Likewise, if you have 1:43:09.000 --> 1:43:12.360 thoughts on anything we've referenced in passing different Dungeons and 1:43:12.439 --> 1:43:17.960 Dragons locations, Dungeons and Dragons novels, what are your favorites? 1:43:18.120 --> 1:43:20.519 Because I really haven't geez, I don't know that I've 1:43:20.520 --> 1:43:23.640 ever read one myself. I'm familiar with them, but I 1:43:24.479 --> 1:43:26.320 never picked one up. So if I were to pick 1:43:26.320 --> 1:43:30.000 one up, which one would it be? These questions and 1:43:30.080 --> 1:43:33.320 more write in with your answers. Just a reminder that 1:43:33.360 --> 1:43:35.400 Stuff to Blow Your Mind is primarily a science and 1:43:35.439 --> 1:43:38.400 culture podcast, with core episodes in the Stuff to Blow 1:43:38.439 --> 1:43:42.760 your Mind podcast feed on Thursdays and Tuesdays, and then 1:43:42.800 --> 1:43:44.760 on Wednesdays we do a short form episode, but on 1:43:44.840 --> 1:43:47.280 Fridays we set aside most serious concerns to just talk 1:43:47.320 --> 1:43:49.800 about a weird film here on weird House Cinema. If 1:43:49.840 --> 1:43:51.000 you want to see a list of all the films 1:43:51.040 --> 1:43:53.719 we've covered over the years, go to letterboxed dot com. 1:43:53.840 --> 1:43:56.240 You'll find us there. Our user name is weird House 1:43:56.479 --> 1:43:58.400 and we have a nice list of everything. We've covered 1:43:58.439 --> 1:44:00.880 all two hundred film selections, and we're going to start 1:44:00.920 --> 1:44:02.920 looking ahead at the future. Sometimes you can peek ahead 1:44:02.920 --> 1:44:05.040 and see what's coming up the following week. 1:44:05.400 --> 1:44:09.120 Huge thanks as always to our excellent audio producer JJ Posway. 1:44:09.400 --> 1:44:10.920 If you would like to get in touch with us 1:44:10.920 --> 1:44:13.360 with feedback on this episode or any other, to suggest 1:44:13.360 --> 1:44:15.400 a topic for the future, or just to say hello, 1:44:15.520 --> 1:44:18.040 you can email us at contact at stuff to Blow 1:44:18.080 --> 1:44:25.720 your Mind dot com. 1:44:25.840 --> 1:44:28.760 Stuff to Blow your Mind is production of iHeartRadio. For 1:44:28.840 --> 1:44:31.639 more podcasts from my Heart Radio, visit the iHeartRadio app, 1:44:31.800 --> 1:44:35.080 Apple Podcasts, or wherever you listen to your favorite shows.