WEBVTT - Performance Anxiety 0:00:00.320 --> 0:00:04.680 Believe it or not, I used to suffer from performance anxiety. 0:00:05.920 --> 0:00:10.320 Well, believe it or not, sometimes I still suffer from 0:00:10.360 --> 0:00:11.360 performance anxiety. 0:00:11.360 --> 0:00:13.080 But what matters is how you overcome it. 0:00:13.880 --> 0:00:19.280 Dead Ass. Wow, it all started with real talk, unfiltered, 0:00:19.360 --> 0:00:21.759 honest and straight from the heart. Since then, we've gone 0:00:21.800 --> 0:00:24.280 on to become Webby award winning podcasters in New York 0:00:24.360 --> 0:00:25.680 Times bestselling authors. 0:00:25.760 --> 0:00:28.280 Dead Ass was more than a podcast for us. It 0:00:28.360 --> 0:00:31.680 was about our growth, a place where we could be vulnerable. 0:00:31.360 --> 0:00:34.560 Be raw, or but most apportly be us. 0:00:34.640 --> 0:00:37.519 But as we know, life keeps evolving and so do we, 0:00:37.640 --> 0:00:40.639 and through it all, one thing has never changed. 0:00:41.080 --> 0:00:41.680 This is. 0:00:43.840 --> 0:00:46.479 Because we got a lot to talk about, all. 0:00:46.520 --> 0:00:49.720 Right, storytime, So I'm gonna tell y'all the moment I 0:00:49.800 --> 0:00:53.599 realized I had performance anxiety. And afterwards then we can 0:00:53.640 --> 0:00:55.840 discuss how I was able to overcome it. But I'll 0:00:55.840 --> 0:00:56.600 never forget this day. 0:00:56.640 --> 0:00:57.400 The earliest moment. 0:00:57.600 --> 0:01:00.640 This is the earliest moment that I remember, and I 0:01:00.680 --> 0:01:03.800 remember I remember saying, like, what's going on? But it 0:01:04.040 --> 0:01:08.440 was sophomore year of high school. I was playing playing 0:01:08.520 --> 0:01:10.080 JV basketball. Was the first time I ever had a 0:01:10.120 --> 0:01:12.959 chance to start. Freshman year, I played basketball in high school. 0:01:13.000 --> 0:01:14.640 I was on the bench the whole time. Mister Brown 0:01:14.720 --> 0:01:16.240 was a basketball coach. He was like, you need to 0:01:16.280 --> 0:01:18.280 learn how to play basketball, and he just like sit. 0:01:18.360 --> 0:01:21.039 So I'm sitting there watching, sitting there watching. Second year 0:01:21.120 --> 0:01:25.480 comes in. It's coach Velasquez, right, and she's a brand 0:01:25.520 --> 0:01:28.320 new coach. And I had gotten way better. I had 0:01:28.319 --> 0:01:31.280 been practicing with my cousin Sean. I had been outside 0:01:31.319 --> 0:01:32.840 in the park and I had At this time, there 0:01:32.880 --> 0:01:36.920 was no performance classes, no speed agility classes. This is 0:01:37.000 --> 0:01:40.120 nineteen ninety nine, right, So now I'm getting ready to 0:01:40.160 --> 0:01:43.759 go try out for the sophomore basketball team. Make the team. 0:01:44.120 --> 0:01:47.400 They start doing everything. I'm a starter, I'm the starting 0:01:47.440 --> 0:01:50.200 point guard. Then the first game is about to hit, 0:01:50.880 --> 0:01:54.640 and up until that point, everything was fun, Everything was cool, 0:01:54.760 --> 0:01:56.680 everything was good, like you know, everybody's oh yeah, we 0:01:56.680 --> 0:01:58.720 about to be good. Da da da da da. Then 0:01:58.720 --> 0:02:01.360 we go into the weight room before the game, we 0:02:01.480 --> 0:02:04.200 all have our warm ups on coaches talking to all 0:02:04.200 --> 0:02:06.600 the starters, and I remember one of the young freshmen 0:02:06.680 --> 0:02:08.640 was just like, Yode, I can't wait to watch you play, 0:02:08.680 --> 0:02:10.600 like you're gonna be good. And it hit me in 0:02:10.639 --> 0:02:12.880 that moment that everybody there was coming to watch you 0:02:13.840 --> 0:02:16.480 me play. And then I went and sat on the bench. 0:02:16.520 --> 0:02:19.120 My stomach got real queasy. I sat on the bench 0:02:19.120 --> 0:02:21.520 and I let my head rest back on the bench, 0:02:21.919 --> 0:02:24.480 and then all I did was wake up. I fell asleep. 0:02:24.520 --> 0:02:27.520 Didn't realize that I had fell asleep. And then I 0:02:27.639 --> 0:02:29.840 woke up, and I was like, and coach, just go, 0:02:29.960 --> 0:02:31.120 let's go to Valaces go to Vale. And I was 0:02:31.120 --> 0:02:34.240 only sleep for maybe like five minutes, but my central 0:02:34.240 --> 0:02:38.640 nervous system felt real low, and when the game started, 0:02:39.480 --> 0:02:44.240 I was like like dragging like behind. And then midway 0:02:44.280 --> 0:02:46.399 through the second quarter, I sat down on the bench 0:02:46.440 --> 0:02:48.040 and I didn't know what was going on because everything 0:02:48.120 --> 0:02:50.680 was like blurry and everything was kind of like happening, 0:02:50.680 --> 0:02:53.760 and everything seemed real loud, and I remember Coach Alaska 0:02:54.160 --> 0:02:56.280 was like, yo, yo, wake up, are you okay? And 0:02:56.320 --> 0:02:59.680 I remember everything going like whoa, And I breathed, and 0:02:59.720 --> 0:03:02.760 I said breathe. I was sweating because and I wasn't 0:03:02.760 --> 0:03:05.200 like playing. I was sweating, and I remember my body 0:03:05.240 --> 0:03:08.200 got real cool, and I breathed and I went back 0:03:08.200 --> 0:03:10.440 in the game, and then the rest was history. I 0:03:10.480 --> 0:03:12.560 was able to like I breathed and I calmed my 0:03:12.560 --> 0:03:14.960 central nervous system down and I played fine. I didn't 0:03:14.960 --> 0:03:16.600 play as good as I wanted to the first game, 0:03:17.160 --> 0:03:19.440 but then the second game, I knew that this was 0:03:19.480 --> 0:03:21.520 gonna happen. So rather than go lay down on the bench, 0:03:21.600 --> 0:03:23.760 I sat up and I just kept breathing, and I 0:03:23.800 --> 0:03:25.560 made sure that my body calmed down, and I played 0:03:25.600 --> 0:03:27.440 well a second game. But that was the first time 0:03:27.520 --> 0:03:30.480 I realized that I had performance anxiety. 0:03:31.120 --> 0:03:33.880 Interesting when we come back, I'll tell you mine. Okay, 0:03:34.920 --> 0:03:36.400 all right, time of karaoke. 0:03:36.680 --> 0:03:40.360 Yes, karaoke, and we were trying to figure out what 0:03:40.400 --> 0:03:43.320 we were going to sing. Yeah, but seeing this how 0:03:43.360 --> 0:03:47.120 to Win the Wicks, seeing this how to KNX just 0:03:47.160 --> 0:03:51.040 won the championship, it only feels right to sing this song. 0:03:51.200 --> 0:03:51.840 That's a fact. 0:03:52.440 --> 0:03:55.480 I got a honeyd guns and honey clips. I'm from 0:03:55.520 --> 0:04:00.000 New York. I gotta send me auto manic that spits 0:04:00.080 --> 0:04:05.600 the time you two and I know, shout out Fat Joe, 0:04:05.640 --> 0:04:13.080 JD Kiss. Who else is on that song? Joe Jady Kiss, 0:04:13.120 --> 0:04:17.800 fab fabuls that No, Fat Joe, what a time to 0:04:17.839 --> 0:04:18.880 be in New York has been. 0:04:18.720 --> 0:04:21.520 Going, That's all I've been hearing that. Of course, the 0:04:21.520 --> 0:04:22.520 Empire state of mind? 0:04:22.839 --> 0:04:23.080 Yeah? 0:04:23.240 --> 0:04:24.000 Is it another one? 0:04:24.120 --> 0:04:26.279 What's another one? This from from New York that we 0:04:26.320 --> 0:04:26.920 hear all the time? 0:04:28.839 --> 0:04:29.039 Oh? 0:04:29.080 --> 0:04:36.080 Shoot, one more, the one with Camon jay Z. Yes, Yes, 0:04:36.520 --> 0:04:37.400 welcome to New York City. 0:04:37.520 --> 0:04:39.320 Yeah, Welcome New York City. 0:04:39.400 --> 0:04:44.000 Those three yeah, those three heavy rotation, shout out to 0:04:44.000 --> 0:04:44.360 New York. 0:04:46.040 --> 0:04:49.760 I mean that said, I'm not from New York. But 0:04:49.800 --> 0:04:52.719 now I understand why she was on stage with jay Z. 0:04:52.800 --> 0:04:57.360 And it was little and and it's just the pride 0:04:57.760 --> 0:05:00.400 that us New Yorkers hash little Mama, So I love 0:05:00.440 --> 0:05:02.560 her down what was. 0:05:02.520 --> 0:05:03.520 Going through mine? 0:05:03.600 --> 0:05:04.920 You get on with jay Z. 0:05:05.240 --> 0:05:06.120 It's the pride. 0:05:07.080 --> 0:05:09.479 Remember, she had just lost her she had just lost 0:05:09.480 --> 0:05:13.600 her grandmother. I believe her mom. She was going through 0:05:13.640 --> 0:05:15.039 you know, she was grieving. But this was also a 0:05:15.040 --> 0:05:17.680 moment where two people who she looked up to the most. 0:05:17.680 --> 0:05:20.720 It's Alicia Keys and jay Z. She's a rapper, and 0:05:20.920 --> 0:05:23.120 you know, like, these are two people from New York 0:05:23.160 --> 0:05:25.159 who was singing this song. And I guess she just 0:05:25.200 --> 0:05:28.000 had the feeling in the moment. And you know, but 0:05:28.080 --> 0:05:30.320 I mean New Yorkers, I can't I can't say I 0:05:30.360 --> 0:05:32.560 wouldn't do it, because if I was in the garden 0:05:33.080 --> 0:05:34.920 and that and they won that championship. I'd have been 0:05:34.960 --> 0:05:36.799 up there just like this too. They'd have been escorting 0:05:36.800 --> 0:05:40.640 my body guard too, like you're not supposed to be up. 0:05:40.600 --> 0:05:44.680 There with you, but I don't right, Josh would have 0:05:44.720 --> 0:05:46.320 been right there behind him, Nick. 0:05:46.800 --> 0:05:48.960 Josh might get kicked out of the garden. 0:05:49.160 --> 0:05:53.440 Josh there, You would have been there. 0:05:53.440 --> 0:05:55.159 Yoah should have seen how Josh was screaming at me 0:05:55.200 --> 0:05:57.479 and Jackson when they want bro It's like he wanted. 0:05:57.600 --> 0:05:59.159 The first person that they called like that. 0:05:59.160 --> 0:06:01.480 That was it was little like they won and two 0:06:01.520 --> 0:06:09.200 seconds dated Jackson jobs, apologies, I love it. 0:06:09.279 --> 0:06:11.400 Shout out to New York for real. 0:06:11.760 --> 0:06:13.479 Let me take Let's take a break and we're gonna 0:06:13.480 --> 0:06:15.600 come back with the meat of the show. 0:06:15.680 --> 0:06:17.719 But before that, or Op or no oh, I. 0:06:17.720 --> 0:06:18.480 Can't speak today. 0:06:19.000 --> 0:06:20.599 We're gonna take a quick break and we're gonna be 0:06:20.600 --> 0:06:22.039 back with op or no op. 0:06:22.120 --> 0:06:23.240 So stick around. 0:06:24.960 --> 0:06:26.880 All right and we're back. I'm gonna toss to my 0:06:26.920 --> 0:06:27.599 girl trips. 0:06:28.600 --> 0:06:32.200 I will say, little Mama has the confidence that I 0:06:32.279 --> 0:06:35.560 wish I had. You know, if I had the confidence 0:06:35.600 --> 0:06:42.600 little mamad that night, I could do anything. Literally, So 0:06:42.680 --> 0:06:45.040 I like threads. I'll be on threads all the time. 0:06:45.080 --> 0:06:49.760 And I saw a video somebody reposted of some guys 0:06:49.760 --> 0:06:53.440 on a podcast, and the caption that they posted was, 0:06:54.360 --> 0:06:57.840 twelve grades with the option for college ain't enough make 0:06:57.960 --> 0:07:01.000 Mike's expensive. That's what they said, because at twelve age, 0:07:01.279 --> 0:07:04.120 twelve grades, twelve grades with the option for college ain't 0:07:04.240 --> 0:07:08.400 enough make Mike's expensive. That was the caption because in 0:07:08.440 --> 0:07:12.760 the video there's a man saying, women say they're willing 0:07:12.800 --> 0:07:13.920 to die for their kids. 0:07:13.920 --> 0:07:16.240 They do anything for the kids, they're willing to die from. 0:07:16.280 --> 0:07:19.480 But as soon as the baby daddy cheats, you leave 0:07:19.560 --> 0:07:22.640 them and break up the family. How you gonna be 0:07:22.760 --> 0:07:25.120 willing to die for your kids, Well, you won't make 0:07:25.160 --> 0:07:27.880 that sacrifice. 0:07:28.560 --> 0:07:30.480 That's a hilarious correlation. 0:07:32.280 --> 0:07:34.840 How did we get there? How did he arrive there? 0:07:35.280 --> 0:07:35.680 I don't know. 0:07:35.760 --> 0:07:38.240 You know, people post things out of context, but that 0:07:38.400 --> 0:07:40.080 was the clip, that was all I saw. 0:07:40.600 --> 0:07:42.680 I think it's funny. I think he was I think 0:07:42.720 --> 0:07:43.760 he was trying to be funny. 0:07:43.840 --> 0:07:46.720 You think so he looked like he was dead serious. 0:07:47.600 --> 0:07:50.000 Whether he was trying to be serious or not, it's 0:07:50.080 --> 0:07:52.280 hilarious if you just think to the juxtaposition, right, I'm 0:07:52.280 --> 0:07:54.640 willing to die for my kids, but I'm not gonna 0:07:54.640 --> 0:07:55.400 stay with this nigga. 0:07:55.600 --> 0:07:58.160 Yeah, that's what he's saying, right right right. 0:07:58.240 --> 0:08:01.520 Think about it. It's hilarious. I give you really think God. 0:08:04.880 --> 0:08:08.440 Death anyway, so it kind of equates to the same 0:08:08.480 --> 0:08:09.720 thing essentially. 0:08:10.280 --> 0:08:10.840 That's crazy. 0:08:10.840 --> 0:08:13.000 I think it's a funny comment. I think he's just 0:08:13.000 --> 0:08:13.679 trying to be funny. 0:08:13.760 --> 0:08:15.880 Yeah, just funny, trying to have it land on the podcast. 0:08:15.880 --> 0:08:19.920 So we have a conversation. 0:08:20.520 --> 0:08:21.400 What's your take on it? 0:08:22.120 --> 0:08:22.760 What's my take? 0:08:22.800 --> 0:08:22.920 Well? 0:08:22.960 --> 0:08:25.760 I wonder like how far are you willing to go? Like, 0:08:26.120 --> 0:08:28.560 or how far do you expect your partner to go 0:08:28.640 --> 0:08:31.280 for you? Like, when you get in a relationship with somebody, 0:08:31.320 --> 0:08:33.560 do you really think like, oh, I can hurt them 0:08:33.559 --> 0:08:35.880 one time and they'll forgive me because they really love me. 0:08:36.240 --> 0:08:38.280 And if they don't forgive you, are you really gonna 0:08:38.320 --> 0:08:40.920 be salty? Because I know some people who fucked up 0:08:41.120 --> 0:08:43.160 in their marriage. They thought it was gonna be cool 0:08:43.160 --> 0:08:46.160 and it wasn't cool, and they was salty for a 0:08:46.200 --> 0:08:48.240 long long time. And I'm like, damn, I mean, you 0:08:48.320 --> 0:08:52.200 probably shouldn't have fucked around and found that out right. 0:08:52.280 --> 0:08:55.080 That's a crazy thing to find out, but I don't 0:08:55.080 --> 0:08:57.960 know because I don't. I also don't necessarily think that 0:08:58.600 --> 0:09:01.040 I've never been married, so maybe I would feel differently, 0:09:01.040 --> 0:09:03.720 but I don't necessarily think infidelity is a deal breaker. 0:09:04.360 --> 0:09:06.800 I'm a very like open person in my relationship. So 0:09:06.840 --> 0:09:08.600 if you if we're dating and you want to date 0:09:08.640 --> 0:09:12.560 other people, we can actually have that conversation. But if 0:09:12.640 --> 0:09:14.720 I had kids, I don't think I would do anything 0:09:15.480 --> 0:09:16.280 simply for my. 0:09:16.280 --> 0:09:18.000 Kids, especially if stay in a relationship. 0:09:18.120 --> 0:09:20.040 I feel you. I don't disagree with that. I think 0:09:20.080 --> 0:09:23.480 it's intent and impact, Like would you and you said 0:09:24.360 --> 0:09:26.160 I'm gonna get into this relationship and if I cheat 0:09:26.160 --> 0:09:28.600 one time, she can't get mad. If that's your mindset, 0:09:28.640 --> 0:09:29.360 then she should lead. 0:09:29.400 --> 0:09:32.600 I was about to conceived into That's. 0:09:32.440 --> 0:09:37.600 What it feels like. Your intent was to cheat. If 0:09:37.600 --> 0:09:40.800 that wasn't your intent, then the impact is different. You 0:09:40.800 --> 0:09:44.120 see what I'm saying. The intent matters to people. If 0:09:44.120 --> 0:09:46.120 that wasn't your intent to hurt my feelings and have 0:09:46.240 --> 0:09:48.240 me deal with it, we can work through it. But 0:09:48.280 --> 0:09:50.240 if your intent was to hurt my feelings, and because 0:09:50.240 --> 0:09:51.840 I'm with you, I should just deal with it because 0:09:51.840 --> 0:09:53.480 it was only one time. No, I'm out of here. 0:09:53.760 --> 0:09:55.760 You see what I'm saying. The intent and the impact 0:09:55.800 --> 0:09:58.840 have to have some genuine or care for the other person. 0:09:59.000 --> 0:10:01.080 If it doesn't, if it's so for seeing them out. 0:10:01.240 --> 0:10:03.120 But his take on the fact that you said you're 0:10:03.120 --> 0:10:04.520 willing to die for your kids, but you want to 0:10:04.520 --> 0:10:06.640 deal with a nigga cheating is funny. It is like, 0:10:06.720 --> 0:10:07.360 it is funny. 0:10:07.520 --> 0:10:09.840 It is funny. It's pretty clever. Yeah, it's clever and 0:10:09.840 --> 0:10:10.360 crazy at. 0:10:10.240 --> 0:10:12.960 The same time, because it's really not willing. Brought that 0:10:13.040 --> 0:10:15.480 up in an argument with a woman. I'm imagining what 0:10:16.200 --> 0:10:19.079 would that look like like real life scenario? 0:10:19.320 --> 0:10:21.640 Hilarious, you said you was willing to die for these 0:10:21.720 --> 0:10:26.280 kids actually one time a bad mother. That's exactly what 0:10:27.800 --> 0:10:28.440 it wouldn't it be. 0:10:30.120 --> 0:10:32.560 And that's a real great way to gaslight somebody because 0:10:32.559 --> 0:10:35.200 I feel like argument I would have to stop and 0:10:35.200 --> 0:10:36.640 think about that first. 0:10:38.080 --> 0:10:42.480 Well, it's the greatest gas lighting I saw was on 0:10:43.400 --> 0:10:52.439 Yolan Yolanda van zand listen, listen, man I tried. 0:10:53.920 --> 0:10:54.200 At all. 0:10:54.320 --> 0:11:01.840 So Yolanda, Okay, a woman on there with two daughters 0:11:01.880 --> 0:11:05.360 and an ex husband, and Yana had this family on 0:11:05.400 --> 0:11:09.520 there and the daughters were going to the mom and saying, 0:11:09.520 --> 0:11:12.800 we're upset at you because you told us that our 0:11:12.920 --> 0:11:16.120 dad sexually assaulted us and abused us, and it turns 0:11:16.160 --> 0:11:18.280 out that he didn't. Why did you lie? 0:11:18.320 --> 0:11:18.600 You know? What? 0:11:18.640 --> 0:11:22.160 Her respond was, he should have fought harder to tell y'all. 0:11:22.160 --> 0:11:25.680 To t y is the biggest guess that I've ever 0:11:25.720 --> 0:11:30.920 seen in my lif She's straight faced. You ain't fight 0:11:30.960 --> 0:11:38.000 hard enough to tell him the truth? And excuse me, 0:11:38.800 --> 0:11:41.000 she was like, if he really loved his daughters, he 0:11:41.000 --> 0:11:42.840 would have felt harder to make sure they knew the truth. 0:11:42.960 --> 0:11:47.960 Didn't take no accountability that she held for years like 0:11:48.040 --> 0:11:51.120 yes and girls like he didn't do it. He didn't 0:11:51.120 --> 0:11:52.440 do it, Like why would you tell us that? And 0:11:52.480 --> 0:11:54.120 she was like, he should have told you, he should 0:11:54.160 --> 0:11:54.640 have worked. 0:11:54.720 --> 0:11:56.440 That's dirty. 0:11:56.440 --> 0:12:02.720 People just be wrong and strong. I'm like, that's. 0:12:03.320 --> 0:12:04.160 That's insanity. 0:12:04.760 --> 0:12:07.319 Her and him need to do a podcast together, that 0:12:07.400 --> 0:12:08.520 lady and this dude. 0:12:08.640 --> 0:12:13.480 That podcast idiots one mic. 0:12:13.679 --> 0:12:17.720 That's that's a great that's why you. 0:12:18.040 --> 0:12:20.360 Podcast exactly exactly. 0:12:20.440 --> 0:12:22.720 That is catchy as hell too, and people would probably 0:12:22.760 --> 0:12:24.079 tune in just for the shenanigans. 0:12:24.160 --> 0:12:27.559 Absolutely, it's entertainment. Absolutely, that's another thing I will say 0:12:27.600 --> 0:12:31.200 to the whole thing about attacking people who have a 0:12:31.240 --> 0:12:33.679 different opinion in you and saying they shouldn't have an 0:12:33.720 --> 0:12:37.280 opinion is what's wrong with the world. Just because someone 0:12:37.400 --> 0:12:40.880 is trying to be jestful or have a different opinion 0:12:41.080 --> 0:12:43.040 or doesn't agree with your take doesn't mean they don't 0:12:43.040 --> 0:12:44.840 have a right to talk, as long as they're not 0:12:44.880 --> 0:12:47.400 being disrespectful or causing harm to people or trying to 0:12:47.400 --> 0:12:50.760 cause violence to people. To let them people talk. We've 0:12:50.760 --> 0:12:54.120 been letting people talk before podcasts, who I I personally 0:12:54.160 --> 0:12:57.160 feel like some people shouldn't even be talking. We have presidence, 0:13:00.120 --> 0:13:01.960 you know what I'm saying. I worry about podcast people, 0:13:02.040 --> 0:13:03.880 but we have a president right now who just says 0:13:03.880 --> 0:13:07.800 whatever he wants on any random day, disrespecting. 0:13:07.200 --> 0:13:08.400 What every platform. 0:13:08.559 --> 0:13:09.960 Yes, you know what I'm saying, But we worried about 0:13:10.000 --> 0:13:12.240 people with podcasts. Man, get out of here, Like, I 0:13:12.240 --> 0:13:12.920 ain't even with that. 0:13:13.000 --> 0:13:16.640 Literally, you have a choice, yes, what you engage in. 0:13:16.960 --> 0:13:19.200 And it does irk my nerves when people are like 0:13:19.600 --> 0:13:22.760 when they hate post stuff like I hate this, let 0:13:22.760 --> 0:13:25.480 me show you. Let me get more engagement off of 0:13:25.559 --> 0:13:28.439 it because I hated it so bad, Like just skipp. 0:13:28.200 --> 0:13:31.240 It it like I never take any energy to like 0:13:31.679 --> 0:13:33.160 repost something I hate. 0:13:33.000 --> 0:13:35.240 Or that is you know who's talking about that I hate? 0:13:35.960 --> 0:13:40.000 Who's who's Courtney Kemp. Jim made a post of how 0:13:40.040 --> 0:13:43.280 she loves that people hate watch her shows, like when 0:13:43.320 --> 0:13:45.480 Power was on, people were saying, like, I hate this. 0:13:45.600 --> 0:13:47.840 The writing is terrible, the acting is terrible. She says, 0:13:47.880 --> 0:13:49.959 she enjoys like go ahead and hate watch it because 0:13:49.960 --> 0:13:52.040 it just runs the numbers up right. But it does 0:13:52.120 --> 0:13:54.440 make you wonder, like why would you watch a show 0:13:54.480 --> 0:13:56.520 that you said you hate and then go online to 0:13:56.600 --> 0:14:00.240 comment and talk for hours? How to show that you 0:14:00.280 --> 0:14:03.560 claim you hate? It makes no sense to me, it doesn't. 0:14:03.679 --> 0:14:06.600 I guess you know, people are entertained by their own 0:14:06.800 --> 0:14:10.880 like anger, or if they're just so disregulated that they 0:14:10.920 --> 0:14:13.800 got to stay in a disregulated state, like they got 0:14:13.840 --> 0:14:15.319 to be mad all the time. 0:14:15.640 --> 0:14:17.000 I don't know, I don't know. 0:14:18.679 --> 0:14:21.840 Somebody said the other day, okay, here's another opera. Not 0:14:22.120 --> 0:14:24.400 because somebody did say on threads the other day that 0:14:24.400 --> 0:14:28.320 they're tired of hearing Uh people use the word whimsy. 0:14:28.960 --> 0:14:32.360 Have y'all heard this whimsy? Yeah, you gotta be chronically 0:14:32.360 --> 0:14:34.840 online to know. But people are using the word whimsy, 0:14:34.960 --> 0:14:38.800 like you don't have any whimsy, you know. And somebody 0:14:38.840 --> 0:14:40.560 was like, oh, I hate that. Give it up learning 0:14:40.640 --> 0:14:43.160 new word. Y'all learn one word and you wear it out. 0:14:43.320 --> 0:14:45.200 Notice how ain't nobody demurreor. 0:14:44.800 --> 0:14:48.960 Anymore like demure whimsy? 0:14:49.120 --> 0:14:52.640 Narcissistic delusional was the one diabolical? 0:14:53.480 --> 0:14:56.400 Yeah, but look at us all enjoying something together. 0:14:56.480 --> 0:14:57.040 That's my op. 0:14:57.640 --> 0:15:01.000 Sometimes we gather around a word and we love to 0:15:01.160 --> 0:15:03.400 use it together. We know what it means, we laugh together, 0:15:03.480 --> 0:15:05.720 we can create jokes out of it, and we are 0:15:05.760 --> 0:15:09.160 one people for just a small amount of time. 0:15:13.480 --> 0:15:15.640 I just think people just love to hate stuff. 0:15:15.760 --> 0:15:18.080 Right like, and they find solidarity. 0:15:18.280 --> 0:15:21.880 That's how cancel culture happened. Let's let's I hate that. 0:15:21.960 --> 0:15:22.560 Let's cancel. 0:15:22.720 --> 0:15:25.200 We get a bunch of ackle to agree that. 0:15:25.240 --> 0:15:28.080 We all, for seventy two hours we hate this. Feel 0:15:28.120 --> 0:15:30.520 in the cycle shifts to something else we hate. 0:15:30.400 --> 0:15:33.520 Because that's how you can collectively. Galvin, here's the truth. 0:15:34.160 --> 0:15:39.000 Those who can't do talk right. So social media has 0:15:39.040 --> 0:15:43.760 allowed all the people who can't do to talk. So 0:15:43.800 --> 0:15:46.000 while people are going out there to try things and 0:15:46.080 --> 0:15:49.080 try things, there's other people who are just talking negatively 0:15:49.120 --> 0:15:51.360 about it. Because they can't do nothing that part. And 0:15:51.400 --> 0:15:53.520 I think more people need to realize what it is 0:15:53.560 --> 0:15:55.480 and use social media for what it's for, Like it's 0:15:55.480 --> 0:15:58.280 not real life. Let people have their billion opinions. They 0:15:58.280 --> 0:15:59.840 hate watch, They don't like this, they don't want to 0:15:59.880 --> 0:16:00.320 use the word. 0:16:00.360 --> 0:16:03.360 Is that driving up engagement? Are people actually watching her shows? Then? 0:16:03.440 --> 0:16:03.680 Great? 0:16:04.120 --> 0:16:08.360 Yeah, yeah, he's watching drives engagement said the same thing. 0:16:08.720 --> 0:16:12.280 People hate Geneva, Yes, they hate Geneva, all the clips 0:16:12.320 --> 0:16:16.600 to go about my facialist versions and all the things. Yes, yes, 0:16:16.760 --> 0:16:20.000 hate watch Geneva, y'all please do I love it? 0:16:20.320 --> 0:16:25.080 Memory Games Michael Rainey Jr. Into his own spin off 0:16:25.080 --> 0:16:28.760 that went for five seeds. They hated him on Power 0:16:28.880 --> 0:16:30.600 They talked so bad and all he did was get 0:16:30.600 --> 0:16:31.400 a whole another. 0:16:31.200 --> 0:16:33.200 Series and got another one. 0:16:33.320 --> 0:16:35.720 Yes, he got another one from see. 0:16:35.480 --> 0:16:37.680 This is and he does Wow, this is? 0:16:38.120 --> 0:16:38.800 This is important? 0:16:38.840 --> 0:16:39.600 Right, that's great. 0:16:39.920 --> 0:16:43.320 You know who hated their way into a multi billion 0:16:43.400 --> 0:16:48.480 dollar generational family, The Kardashians. I heard so much talk 0:16:48.520 --> 0:16:50.480 from people I hate the Kardashians, and they just kept 0:16:50.520 --> 0:16:53.240 making more money, dripping more products, having more TV. 0:16:53.040 --> 0:16:57.160 Shows for y'all stupid as telling us you hate it if. 0:16:56.840 --> 0:16:59.160 You think about it, if you think about it, that 0:16:59.480 --> 0:16:59.840 most of. 0:16:59.840 --> 0:17:01.680 The hate has funded their entire life. 0:17:01.920 --> 0:17:06.320 Jake Paul, Yeah, people hate watch his fights and he 0:17:06.440 --> 0:17:09.160 makes millions of dollars every time he gets on age. 0:17:09.320 --> 0:17:11.879 I'm about to fight Floyd Mayweather. This with people, so 0:17:11.880 --> 0:17:14.080 I'm not watching that ship. This ain't real boxing. 0:17:14.280 --> 0:17:16.200 Meanwhile, Jake Paul breaks another record. 0:17:17.119 --> 0:17:19.720 It's the truth both right, it's the truth. 0:17:19.760 --> 0:17:21.359 It is good ship. 0:17:22.240 --> 0:17:24.239 If you hate, keep your opinion to yourself and your 0:17:24.280 --> 0:17:24.679 shut up. 0:17:25.200 --> 0:17:25.400 Right. 0:17:25.600 --> 0:17:28.800 I can't tell you the things that I hate because 0:17:28.800 --> 0:17:30.679 if I hate it, I don't watch it. 0:17:31.000 --> 0:17:31.879 Yeah, that's true. 0:17:32.160 --> 0:17:34.840 And to me, I think this ties into what we're 0:17:34.840 --> 0:17:37.680 talking about today performance anxiety, because I feel like when 0:17:37.680 --> 0:17:40.320 you judge other people, and when you spend a lot 0:17:40.320 --> 0:17:42.840 of time judging earth people or hate watching stuff, you 0:17:42.920 --> 0:17:46.840 then start to develop like subconscious fear of doing. 0:17:48.440 --> 0:17:49.359 I like that trip. 0:17:49.520 --> 0:17:51.639 I never thought about that, but I can see that though. 0:17:52.200 --> 0:17:56.000 Yeah, because remember something because you think someone will do. 0:17:56.119 --> 0:18:00.919 To you what them it's projections, Yes, this production, So 0:18:00.960 --> 0:18:03.399 you should ask yourself first, do you have anxiety because 0:18:03.400 --> 0:18:05.680 you hate watch people and you get upset watch other 0:18:05.720 --> 0:18:08.600 people try stuff that deep? As hell. 0:18:08.880 --> 0:18:09.639 That's interesting. 0:18:10.200 --> 0:18:12.800 Did you ever overcome your performance anxiety for we're trying. 0:18:12.640 --> 0:18:13.280 To back to the story. 0:18:13.359 --> 0:18:18.119 Yeah, what did you do? Repetition tactics? Repetition this I 0:18:18.280 --> 0:18:20.800 know works for a fact, bro the thing that you're 0:18:20.880 --> 0:18:25.960 worried about the most. Practice it until it becomes muscle memory, 0:18:26.200 --> 0:18:27.760 because then when you go out to try to do it, 0:18:28.000 --> 0:18:29.840 you don't have to think about doing it, so then 0:18:29.880 --> 0:18:33.040 your anxiety shuts off because you've done it so many times. 0:18:33.560 --> 0:18:35.560 Case in point. I used to hate having to be 0:18:35.640 --> 0:18:37.800