Speaker 1: Hell I suck at Dating with Dengler Dared Haven and
Speaker 1: I heard radio podcast. Hey everybody, welcome to an all
Speaker 1: new episode of help by such a Dating. I'm Jared Haven,
Speaker 1: joined by Dean Anglert. Obviously you guys suck ar me.
Speaker 1: Thank you so much for tuning in this episode. We
Speaker 1: have a very exciting episode coming up from Bachelor. Uh
Speaker 1: you know her from Colton season, Elise del Bomb. Do
Speaker 1: you think that's how you say a dean? I'm terrible names.
Speaker 1: I didn't think that. I thought her last name was Michelle. Well,
Speaker 1: you were way off on that one. We're gonna now
Speaker 1: that I'm saying it out. Now that I'm saying it
Speaker 1: out loud, I realized how stupid I am. But that's
Speaker 1: what our Instagram thing is. It's a Elise Michelle, I
Speaker 1: think is what it is on Instagram. Right. I found
Speaker 1: that a lot of people put their middle name up there.
Speaker 1: I don't know why, but a lot of people will
Speaker 1: put their first middle name as their Instagram handle. So
Speaker 1: we're gonna have to solve this mystery with at lease
Speaker 1: later on. Um. We also have obviously some emails. We
Speaker 1: have a day eating term that I need everybody to
Speaker 1: focus and define, and then of course the big week
Speaker 1: de Mario Johnson, who we talked to a couple of
Speaker 1: weeks who is kind of dating are very lovely producer Becky,
Speaker 1: and he's gonna becomeing to l a this week, which
Speaker 1: means Dean and I get to grill Becky and give
Speaker 1: her some date ideas of what they should do. I mean,
Speaker 1: this is this is huge, This is big. I mean,
Speaker 1: Becky's gonna go on a date with the Mario, the
Speaker 1: guy that she met via Instagram because of help. I
Speaker 1: suck at dating. I mean, we're just forming relationships one
Speaker 1: podcast at a time. But we also have another big
Speaker 1: guest calling in, don't we Jared? Uh? Do we? Well,
Speaker 1: don't we have? Oh? Yeah, that's sorry, sorry, sorry, we
Speaker 1: do have a big guest. Holy, I forgot about my
Speaker 1: mother in law. All right, so apparently October is National
Speaker 1: call your mother in law Day. I don't know. It
Speaker 1: feels like a made up holiday. I gotta be honest. Oh,
Speaker 1: Ashley wants me to joke about her my mother in
Speaker 1: law's crush on Dean, which there is a massive crush.
Speaker 1: I'm gonna be honest with you, Dean. She loves you,
Speaker 1: She loves you very much. She loves your face, she
Speaker 1: loves your personality, she loves Dean. I'll tell you she
Speaker 1: loves you so much. I told the Suspender story the
Speaker 1: other day. Listen to this. So, when we're posing for pictures,
Speaker 1: apparently Audrey, my mother in law, feels super awkward taking pictures.
Speaker 1: She always has, so she needs someone to try to
Speaker 1: make her smile naturally. And the way we try to
Speaker 1: do it, I'm not joking, this is a series. Right
Speaker 1: before they take the picture, we say Dean, Dean, and
Speaker 1: she likes smiles, and then that's how we do it.
Speaker 1: It's there's two names, I swear to god, I'm not
Speaker 1: even joking about this. There's two names that we yell
Speaker 1: to make her smile naturally, Dean and Mark Wahlberg. So
Speaker 1: it's the second one. Mark Wallburg. You're in good company,
Speaker 1: Mark Walberg. I'll take Marky Mark. You ever see Marky
Speaker 1: Marks Haynes at because that is peak Marky Mark. What's
Speaker 1: funny is I even have this conversation today with one
Speaker 1: of my friends. Uh. I can't remember what it was
Speaker 1: exactly about, but I was like saying, like, I don't understand, uh,
Speaker 1: why Audrey would even like I don't know. I just
Speaker 1: it's so funny to me that she like likes me
Speaker 1: even in my own eyes. I don't know exactly why, Dean,
Speaker 1: you look like Jack Dawson. Uh is that a compliment?
Speaker 1: I don't know who Jack Dawson is. That's from Titanic. Yeah,
Speaker 1: that's Leon not or DiCaprio from Titanic. Yes, that's a compliment.
Speaker 1: I'll take you. I do think that I've been steadily
Speaker 1: declining for the past like five years, so maybe I'm
Speaker 1: just like, uh, you know, I'm a little self conscious.
Speaker 1: But that's really good to hear, and I'm I'm excited
Speaker 1: to hear from your step mom too. I'm probably gonna
Speaker 1: take a step back while you have that conversation with her,
Speaker 1: just so like you guys can kind of, you know,
Speaker 1: have your national call your mother in law day. Uh.
Speaker 1: The question for you should I call Kalin's mother because
Speaker 1: she's like my mother in law, So should should we
Speaker 1: give her a call to or No? I'm absolutely I
Speaker 1: would love for Calin's mom to be on this podcast.
Speaker 1: You know what's funny is I've been dating Calin. I
Speaker 1: want to say for like what fifteen or six teen
Speaker 1: months now, I don't think I've had a single converence.
Speaker 1: I don't I've never met her mother. I've never had
Speaker 1: a conversation with her. I I don't know. It's kind
Speaker 1: of strange. I feel like, I mean, is she close
Speaker 1: with her parents? Not to like she's not. She's not.
Speaker 1: She's very close with her grandparents, so I like, I
Speaker 1: I love her grandparents. They live in Las Vegas, and
Speaker 1: we've seen them and spent quite a lot of time
Speaker 1: with them. And she's definitely far, far closer uh with
Speaker 1: her grandparents, and she is, but she obviously, you know,
Speaker 1: it's her mom, so she loves her mom. But but yeah,
Speaker 1: it's just kind of strange that I've never met her.
Speaker 1: But I do think that this is the year. I
Speaker 1: think the thing is is her mother doesn't like to like,
Speaker 1: she's like got this um diversion for her, I'm sorry,
Speaker 1: a version for airplanes. She doesn't like to travel on airplanes.
Speaker 1: And she lives all the way on the East Coast
Speaker 1: and we just have never really killing and I've never
Speaker 1: really been to the East Coast. But but her grandparents
Speaker 1: are so close. But I just think that's kind of funny.
Speaker 1: Speaking of the devil here she comes with the plate
Speaker 1: pizza of pizza. She got a pizza for me. I
Speaker 1: was just telling them how it's kind of funny how
Speaker 1: we've been dating for what sixteen months and today seven years,
Speaker 1: and today is call your mother in law day. Jared
Speaker 1: called his mother in law Ashley's mom, and I was
Speaker 1: just thinking, it's funny. I don't think I've ever even
Speaker 1: had a conversation with your mother. Yes, we've had a
Speaker 1: brief FaceTime conversation. But I was telling them that she's
Speaker 1: got like this aversion to flying, and she doesn't like
Speaker 1: to travel very much, so that's why she's like all
Speaker 1: stuck on the East coast. Do you want to come
Speaker 1: in and say hi to everyone? I feel like I
Speaker 1: don't even think Calin has been on this podcast yet,
Speaker 1: but she's been on the Pocket time was over here.
Speaker 1: Do you know my mom's name? Yes, here's Klin, say
Speaker 1: hi to everyone, Calin. Caitlin asked if I know her
Speaker 1: mother's name. Yes, I know her mother. Your mother's name
Speaker 1: is Jalia, she said, the first time that Calin said
Speaker 1: her mom's name, Jaliah jay Leah, I was like, that
Speaker 1: is not her humans name, and her last name is
Speaker 1: Kim nicky. So he was like, you just made that up. Yeah,
Speaker 1: all right. Well, while we have Calin here, I have
Speaker 1: I have a lot of questions for Calin. So uh klin,
Speaker 1: what is the most annoying thing Dean does? Um? And
Speaker 1: if you have a list, feel free to talk as
Speaker 1: long as you need. I got a little frustrated with
Speaker 1: him because his time management skills are not the best.
Speaker 1: Sometimes he likes sometimes he likes stick golf or play
Speaker 1: video games and not do the things that he needs
Speaker 1: to do. And I'm like, well, prioritize the things that
Speaker 1: you need to get done and then you can have
Speaker 1: your fun time. Yeah. The funny thing, the ironic thing
Speaker 1: is I was twenty late to record. I would say
Speaker 1: I would agree with that. I would say if I
Speaker 1: were there was this, uh this Instagram quote I saw
Speaker 1: the other day. It's like, be the person that you
Speaker 1: want to be best friends with, Like if you like
Speaker 1: look at yourself from like another perspective, like would you
Speaker 1: be friends with yourself? And I always think about that,
Speaker 1: and I've been like acting more consciously to be friends,
Speaker 1: to like be confident that the person that I see
Speaker 1: it myself as would be my friend. And I always
Speaker 1: think about how piste off I would be if one
Speaker 1: of my friends, or like if I was another person
Speaker 1: and me Dean was always late to the things that
Speaker 1: we had planned, and it's very I would be frustrated,
Speaker 1: and I get that. It's like one of those things.
Speaker 1: You know. What's funny, though, is that you always make
Speaker 1: up for it. Like here's the thing. We talked about
Speaker 1: this on the podcast last week. It's impossible to be
Speaker 1: mad at you, Dean and Caitlin, I want to ask you,
Speaker 1: have you do you find yourself being in the same
Speaker 1: scenario where Dean will do something stupid and you want
Speaker 1: to be so mad at him, but for some reason
Speaker 1: it's impossible. Yes. No, it's so frustrating and it's funny.
Speaker 1: So we're in the Maldives. There is a guy kind
Speaker 1: of like in charge of our schedule, and Dean was
Speaker 1: always late, and he was like, I just don't understand
Speaker 1: this guy. Like he's late for scuba diving. Everyone's mad
Speaker 1: at him, and he gets off the boat and everyone's
Speaker 1: best friends with him. Like even the guy in the
Speaker 1: Maldives was like, this guy is impossible to be mad at.
Speaker 1: It was funny that we I went scuba diving and
Speaker 1: I showed up like ten minutes late to the boat,
Speaker 1: like the charter boat that we were like leaving on,
Speaker 1: and everyone was like super piste off at me. But
Speaker 1: then like when we got back, they were all like, oh,
Speaker 1: let's stay in touch and let's come scuba diving with
Speaker 1: this tomorrow. I don't know. It's kind of funny, I guess,
Speaker 1: But as much as I would love for us to
Speaker 1: just sit here and talk about all my shortcomings, I
Speaker 1: do think that we need to bring in art. You
Speaker 1: have a charm to you that's like people can't get
Speaker 1: mad at you because you're so charming and you're so
Speaker 1: sweet and you're so I think it's I think it's
Speaker 1: because you all. Honestly, I think you just like Dean,
Speaker 1: you have this kind of this is gonna be sound weird,
Speaker 1: but you you're kind of like a dog. Yeah, he's
Speaker 1: like a little puppy you can't get mad at. But
Speaker 1: also because like like I I look at Lois and
Speaker 1: she's just like happy and full of love and positive
Speaker 1: and her tails always wagging, and you're like, I can't
Speaker 1: be mad at you because you're just so sweet and
Speaker 1: like as weird is this is going to sound to
Speaker 1: describe you like that that's similar to you, Like even
Speaker 1: when you walk in fifteen minutes late, you have a
Speaker 1: huge smile on your face and you're like, God, it's
Speaker 1: good to hear your voices. And I know you're doing
Speaker 1: it to suck up because you don't want us to
Speaker 1: be mad at you, but it works. And I also
Speaker 1: know that it's like coming from it's also coming from
Speaker 1: like a place of of authenticity, like there's nothing fake
Speaker 1: about you. And I think your your overall vibe, positivity
Speaker 1: and happiness really just it shines, and uh, I think
Speaker 1: that's why nobody can get mad at you, including your
Speaker 1: your girlfriend. Listen, guys, I would love for rest all
Speaker 1: sit here and have my horn beto over and over again,
Speaker 1: but we do have to move on. Unfortunately, we can
Speaker 1: get back to the the praise and the affection later on.
Speaker 1: I honestly could talk about your guy's relationships all podcasts
Speaker 1: like Kitlin. I need you to come on because I
Speaker 1: need to just talk to both you guys, because I
Speaker 1: find you guys fascinating. One year a beautiful couple. You
Speaker 1: guys are super happy, but like I, I find your
Speaker 1: relationship fascinating and it's awesome. We're the couple that shouldn't work,
Speaker 1: but we work. It's weird. We like to We like
Speaker 1: to keep the enigmatic persona. You know, we don't do
Speaker 1: many joining interviews. Kaitlin ever comes on the podcast. I
Speaker 1: don't like to be in her YouTube videos, et cetera.
Speaker 1: We like to keep it enigmatic. But we are gonna
Speaker 1: we're gonna take one quick break and then we're gonna
Speaker 1: get to Elise, which I think she's sure calling in
Speaker 1: right now. There she is. Um, we're gonna take one
Speaker 1: quick break and we're gonna jump into our bit with
Speaker 1: Elise to check in with her and see how she's doing. Hey,
Speaker 1: welcome back to help. I saw at dating. I just
Speaker 1: that just felt right, you know, coming from the gut,
Speaker 1: coming from the soul. We have a very special guests.
Speaker 1: You of course know her from Colden season of The Bachelor,
Speaker 1: where she famously left the show on her own terms,
Speaker 1: and early she was a fan favorite. A lot of
Speaker 1: people thought that she was going to be the bachelorette.
Speaker 1: It is Elise Dell Bomb. Elise, thank you so much
Speaker 1: for joining us. How are you? Yes, thank you. I
Speaker 1: feel like this is an appropriate podcast for me to
Speaker 1: be on because I think I might suck a day too.
Speaker 1: Why do you think you stuck at dating? Let's start there. Well,
Speaker 1: I mean, if you can hear a cat in the
Speaker 1: background and being thirty three, I might just be turning
Speaker 1: into an old cat lady. By bachelor standards, how many
Speaker 1: cats you have? Just one? Oh, that's not bad, You're fine,
Speaker 1: It's not bad. I think once you reach over seven
Speaker 1: is when it becomes an issue. But as long as
Speaker 1: you have less than that, you're fine. No. I have
Speaker 1: one very high maintenance cat, and I think I'm I
Speaker 1: think I'm not gonna add that cat lady to my
Speaker 1: profile and each time soon by having seven of them. No,
Speaker 1: but it's definitely coming at least. I do have a
Speaker 1: question for you. So Jared's saying that you left on
Speaker 1: your own accord on Colton season, refresh my memory because
Speaker 1: I do remember that moment, and I know it's been
Speaker 1: what it's been a year and a half or however
Speaker 1: long it's been since you were on the Bachelor, but
Speaker 1: I do, Uh, I want to like relive that scenario
Speaker 1: real quick with here. That's okay, sure, I put on
Speaker 1: really overly dressed out fit and uh marched my ass
Speaker 1: over to his room and said goodbye, and it was
Speaker 1: obviously it played out quite dramatically because you know, it's
Speaker 1: two in the morning in Thailand and we're all in
Speaker 1: seventeen hours of time change. But um, it just wasn't.
Speaker 1: He wasn't the person for me, and I knew that.
Speaker 1: And as much as you know, going to Vietnam would
Speaker 1: have been fun, it was just my time to go.
Speaker 1: Did you asked? Did you get asked? Did you paradise? Um? I? Originally,
Speaker 1: I think when I left the show they were pretty
Speaker 1: much aware that, um, I might not be open to it.
Speaker 1: But then, um, you know, as time goes on, you
Speaker 1: kind of think, well, maybe you know, I don't want
Speaker 1: to like say no to an opportunity. So we talked
Speaker 1: about it. But by the time we got my like
Speaker 1: testing and all that stuff done, everyone had pretty much
Speaker 1: coupled up. We decided probably wasn't. Would you would you
Speaker 1: go on paradise like next year? If there is one?
Speaker 1: I'll tell you what, sure, because at least Claire's guys
Speaker 1: our age appropriate. Sure? Is that what your main hesitation
Speaker 1: was going into it? Last time? Was the younger that
Speaker 1: was you know, I shouldn't say a hundred percent, but
Speaker 1: that was a huge part of it. I don't think
Speaker 1: it doesn't necessarily matter what age you are. It's all
Speaker 1: about like life experience and lessons you've learned. But I
Speaker 1: think I've lived a lot of life in thirty three
Speaker 1: years where I just could not imagine myself like being
Speaker 1: seriously interested in year old. Yeah, no, I agree sometimes,
Speaker 1: Like you know that she has gotten a little bit
Speaker 1: of a backlash for going younger, and obviously now we're
Speaker 1: going older with with with Claire, not older Claire still
Speaker 1: very young obviously, but you know what I'm talking about. Um,
Speaker 1: I hope you go on Paradise because actually Ashley's behind
Speaker 1: her right now. But we were talking about you last
Speaker 1: night because you were coming on the podcast, and we
Speaker 1: both agreed that you were so Um it's weird to say,
Speaker 1: like you're under utilized in the Bachelor franchise, but you're beautiful,
Speaker 1: you have your together, Uh, you know, you're you're ready.
Speaker 1: Like it's like you were on Colton season. You left
Speaker 1: early and everybody wanted to see you on Paradise and
Speaker 1: people were calling for you to be the next bachelorrete
Speaker 1: because they loved how you left, and really, you know,
Speaker 1: stood your ground and said exactly what you wanted, and
Speaker 1: so I think you'd be perfect for Paradise, Like you'd
Speaker 1: be the perfect person to come. Like halfway through, we're like,
Speaker 1: I know this is not what you want, and I'm sorry,
Speaker 1: but like I'm thinking like a producer now where you
Speaker 1: come halfway through, people are already started coupling up, and
Speaker 1: it's like, oh, that's a least, that's the least, And
Speaker 1: then like you're the temptation that they throw towards guys.
Speaker 1: I mean, hopefully you're their day one, but well you know,
Speaker 1: they have a lot of girls to choose from since
Speaker 1: they didn't get to do it this year. So we'll see.
Speaker 1: But I tell you, I am have always been very
Speaker 1: comfortable when I'm single, except this year COVID when you
Speaker 1: are isolated, because I love alone. I mean, board games
Speaker 1: are pretty boring when you're playing them by yourself and
Speaker 1: you're stuck at home for a few months at a time.
Speaker 1: So at this point, I mean, get me on a beach.
Speaker 1: Just talking to people sounds thrilling. Well, at least, let's
Speaker 1: be real. You don't live alone. You've got a cat, right,
Speaker 1: but there's certain you know things, but that cuddle session
Speaker 1: only goes so far. Yeah, I mean, I hear you.
Speaker 1: I cuddle with my dog Lois all the time, but
Speaker 1: sometimes I need sometimes I like being small spoon. I'm
Speaker 1: gonna be honest, I feel like a real man amidst
Speaker 1: that I need Ashley to hold me. Sometimes I hold
Speaker 1: her too. We'll allow it. Um, So, what has dating
Speaker 1: been like for you in during COVID? You know, like
Speaker 1: you said, you're single. There's a lot of people who
Speaker 1: are dealing with dating right now during these crazy times.
Speaker 1: What it's been Has it been like for you? It's
Speaker 1: been almost non existent. I I did develop a little
Speaker 1: quarantine crush that quickly played itself out, and it was
Speaker 1: if I'm being completely honest, it would not have worked
Speaker 1: in a normal situation, But because he was just so
Speaker 1: fun to talk to, he was a lovely distraction and
Speaker 1: it was fun to have, you know, something to look
Speaker 1: forward to if FaceTime date. But you know, had we
Speaker 1: been it probably went a little bit longer than it
Speaker 1: would have if we were actually in a regular dating scenario.
Speaker 1: But I think there's something to be said that's positive
Speaker 1: about um. You know, we kind of live in an
Speaker 1: overly sexualized world. Let's just be honest, and there's nothing
Speaker 1: wrong with that. However, I think there's something to be
Speaker 1: said that people are making connections like online and having
Speaker 1: to really establish some communication and try to find more
Speaker 1: creative ways than just you know, swiping right and going
Speaker 1: out to coffee or drinks and seeing what happens. You
Speaker 1: actually have to get to know someone when you can't
Speaker 1: see them. So I think there's positives to it. But
Speaker 1: for me, it's been this has been a really really
Speaker 1: challenging year personally. My career was has basically been non
Speaker 1: existent since it started. So it's been a year of
Speaker 1: day by day and some times that my focus is
Speaker 1: not so much on dating when I'm just trying to
Speaker 1: figure out my next step when god, we don't ever
Speaker 1: know what our next step is in this there, No,
Speaker 1: it's so crazy. Now you're a business owner, I mean,
Speaker 1: you own a company called Glamour Grass LLC. So tell
Speaker 1: us a little bit about that, and I'm assuming that's
Speaker 1: what you're talking about during COVID right now, and how
Speaker 1: it's you know, struggling. Absolutely not the business I don't
Speaker 1: want to say this buzzes struggling, But for every business
Speaker 1: owner right now, we can absolutely say I've been a
Speaker 1: makeup artist for UM a little over twelve years. And
Speaker 1: then I also teach, and obviously school is shut down
Speaker 1: and makeup, you know, we do a lot of freelance
Speaker 1: for special events, weddings, things of that nature, and those
Speaker 1: those just aren't happening. And then my online business is
Speaker 1: teaching in one on one makeup lessons, kind of picking
Speaker 1: up where I think YouTube leaves off, where there's you know,
Speaker 1: makeup gurus, UM, but really teaching individual for that person,
Speaker 1: skin type, tone, texture, age, all of that. And I
Speaker 1: love it. I absolutely love it. But I've had to
Speaker 1: go back to Barton and just to have something that
Speaker 1: gives me peace of mind of I know I can
Speaker 1: pay my bills when when things have been constantly changing
Speaker 1: this year. What do you mean by bartender because you
Speaker 1: live in Arizona, YESA maybe they're just like a little
Speaker 1: bit more lax, because when I imagine bartending in like
Speaker 1: Los Angeles, for instance, I don't know if I've even
Speaker 1: seen a bartender for the past. And I'm working inside
Speaker 1: of a hotel, and so because it's a hotel, they
Speaker 1: are open, right, so they have you know, very strict regulations.
Speaker 1: But the company is privately owned, and they've just been
Speaker 1: amazing to work for and really helped out their staff
Speaker 1: during this time. Even myself, who came on right before
Speaker 1: the lockdown. Yeah, I barted him for many years of
Speaker 1: my life. I have I have some friends who are
Speaker 1: small business owners as well, Like Peter from my season Is,
Speaker 1: he owns a small gym in Wisconsin, and he was
Speaker 1: like saying his business was so new that he is
Speaker 1: having trouble, Like, Uh, it's just such a time to
Speaker 1: be a small business owner, like, especially like obviously with
Speaker 1: COVID and all that kind of stuff going on, especially
Speaker 1: when it's like hands on, like at least like yours
Speaker 1: is obviously have to like be in people's faces and
Speaker 1: like working with people directly all the time. Uh, It's
Speaker 1: just it's I'm yeah, I definitely feel for you guys well,
Speaker 1: and I don't want it to sound like a paper
Speaker 1: because we're all going through it at some level, whether
Speaker 1: it's impact to do personally or professionally or both. We've
Speaker 1: all I mean to all of us. Yeah, huh, it's crazy.
Speaker 1: Well that that just means everybody go to glamor Grass
Speaker 1: right now. If you're looking for for any type of makeup.
Speaker 1: I saw the link is in your bio correct alright,
Speaker 1: so go to Elisa's Instagram right now. If you're listening
Speaker 1: to this podcast and you don't follow, at least, I'm
Speaker 1: not sure what you're doing with your life, So go
Speaker 1: follow it right now. Go click the link in or bio,
Speaker 1: go to glamor grass buy some makeup because we all
Speaker 1: you know I'm going to need to make up to
Speaker 1: Let's be honest, like I got the light on me
Speaker 1: right now, I could use some um. But at least
Speaker 1: we also want to talk about your hosting What a
Speaker 1: Girl Wants pod cast this week. Thank you so much
Speaker 1: for stepping in and doing a far better or myself
Speaker 1: could ever imagine doing. Oh wow, that's a lot of
Speaker 1: credit that will has yet to be determined if I deserve,
Speaker 1: I have full faith. So what are you talking? What
Speaker 1: do you want to talk about? Like? What what are
Speaker 1: some things in the dating world that bug you? You love,
Speaker 1: you hate? Um? What are you gonna talk about on
Speaker 1: the podcast? Well, jeez, we might need more than one
Speaker 1: podcast to go through my experience in the dating world.
Speaker 1: But I'm actually gonna be talking to someone that I
Speaker 1: found during COVID on YouTube, and he is a therapist
Speaker 1: and he also has been a couple's therapistically for twenty
Speaker 1: plus years. But he has a YouTube channel where he
Speaker 1: reacts to reality TV shows and talks about and like
Speaker 1: will pause the video and really break down, like as
Speaker 1: a therapist, what he wishes he could see in that
Speaker 1: moment as far as communication, and I have learned so
Speaker 1: much about where I've gone wrong, um that I'm just
Speaker 1: excited talk to him and get perspective on only like
Speaker 1: how to come out of COVID and maybe have at
Speaker 1: least say that I've learned something and can date a
Speaker 1: little bit more healthy, but also to ask him questions about,
Speaker 1: you know, maybe bring up some of my past relationships
Speaker 1: and see if he has any pointers of where I
Speaker 1: missed the mark. Do you go to therapy currently or like,
Speaker 1: have you always kind of advocated for it? Absolutely? Um,
Speaker 1: I went to my first therapy session, I think when
Speaker 1: I was sixteen. I had a very good friend of
Speaker 1: mine tragically passed away and didn't quite know how to
Speaker 1: process that. And it's not something that's been consistent in
Speaker 1: my life. But I think there's just such a massive
Speaker 1: thing to be said for whether it's couples counseling, or
Speaker 1: you're just going for yourself. Um, your friends and your
Speaker 1: family are always going to have a biased opinion. So
Speaker 1: to see someone that is non biased, that has your
Speaker 1: best intentions at heart, but also can point out your faults,
Speaker 1: I think is so so important because everyone else in
Speaker 1: your life is coming from place of love and with
Speaker 1: that agenda. Whereas it's nice to have someone to really
Speaker 1: you can voice your innermost and sometimes not so nice
Speaker 1: thoughts without judgment. Right. It's funny because we've talked about
Speaker 1: this on the podcast in the past, and my journey
Speaker 1: on this podcast personally has been it's been long what
Speaker 1: we've been recording I think for like three years now.
Speaker 1: And the first year I was like very anxious and
Speaker 1: consistently like had been dealing with all this inner turmoil.
Speaker 1: And don't get me wrong, like I still have those issues,
Speaker 1: but I always had this weird like stigma attached to
Speaker 1: therapy and like seeing a therapist and how like it
Speaker 1: would be looked as on as like weak or like
Speaker 1: you're less of a person because you need therapy. But
Speaker 1: then I started going to therapy and I like just
Speaker 1: like open my eyes. And then the second I started
Speaker 1: talking about therapy with people too, Like I would even
Speaker 1: see these like, you know, if I'm having a conversation
Speaker 1: my friend, I would start talking about how I'm going
Speaker 1: to therapy, and like they're from my experience, their like
Speaker 1: eyes would light up and they'd be like wow, like
Speaker 1: it's it's just such a it's so weirdly taboo, you
Speaker 1: know what I mean. And I think that there's never
Speaker 1: enough advocation that we can make for going to therapy,
Speaker 1: whether you're consistently, whether you have like a dilemma in
Speaker 1: your life that you're trying to like sort through, you
Speaker 1: go for a short amount of time and then maybe
Speaker 1: you go take some time off and you go back.
Speaker 1: But uh, it's so it's so funny because my personal
Speaker 1: journey with therapy has been so like, uh, you know,
Speaker 1: I look down on it for so long and then
Speaker 1: I did it, and now I advocate for it. But
Speaker 1: at least, like you kind of said, I haven't been
Speaker 1: in a while, but it's definitely opened my eyes to
Speaker 1: the progress that you're able to make by going to it,
Speaker 1: you know, absolutely. And I think where the taboos sometimes
Speaker 1: come from comes from as people assume, oh, something's wrong,
Speaker 1: like maybe we should start going to therapy before there's
Speaker 1: something wrong, whether it's as like I said, as a couple,
Speaker 1: going to therapy before there's problems, so that you can
Speaker 1: navigate problems that our eyes better, but also just for yourself.
Speaker 1: I mean, we all have traumas that sometimes you don't
Speaker 1: even realize that we're dealing with and being able to
Speaker 1: work through that, you know, again in an unbiased way,
Speaker 1: and sometimes I'll be honest, eyes sometimes just have a
Speaker 1: therapy session to bitch a little bit about this year.
Speaker 1: You have to. You have to sometimes you just gotta
Speaker 1: get off your chest. You can't let it on there.
Speaker 1: You know, you can't let it linger there. It's going
Speaker 1: to destroy you. Uh yeah. Somebody made the analogy about
Speaker 1: therapy and it made a lot of sense to me.
Speaker 1: How people routinely go to the gym to like maintain health, right. Uh.
Speaker 1: You Like you don't just eat like for years and
Speaker 1: years and years and then one day but like, oh
Speaker 1: I'm just gonna go to the gym one time and
Speaker 1: like it'll be fine. No, you consistently go to the
Speaker 1: gym to try to work out and maintain health. It's
Speaker 1: the same thing with therapy. You know, you have to
Speaker 1: go routinely, and like you said before, like a bigger
Speaker 1: problem occurs, try to get some therapy in there before
Speaker 1: you know, uh, you know, just to maintain your mental health.
Speaker 1: I totally agree. I've been to therapy, um and it's
Speaker 1: it's pretty awesome that you're speaking out for that cause
Speaker 1: at least I just want to say thank you so
Speaker 1: much for joining us. You are so sweet. I truly
Speaker 1: hope that you find uh someone before Bachelor in Paradise,
Speaker 1: but if you don't, I really hope to see you
Speaker 1: on that beach. Well, let's just we don't get locked
Speaker 1: down again, because it's it's not helping the day in life.
Speaker 1: It's so bad. I feel bad for admiring that Florida
Speaker 1: went back on lockdown. I don't know. Also, I want
Speaker 1: to I want to say because Jared did mention that
Speaker 1: you were in the running to be Bachelor, and as
Speaker 1: I would love to see you as a bachelorette, but
Speaker 1: I do want to say that I think that you
Speaker 1: got lucky by not being this year's bachelorette, because it's like,
Speaker 1: who wants to just sit in India for two months
Speaker 1: and go on dates where it's just I don't know,
Speaker 1: it's fun, it's great and don't get me wrong, it
Speaker 1: could lead to wonderful, fruitful things. But it's like, there
Speaker 1: are better years to be the best. I mean, let's
Speaker 1: be honest. The travel is a huge part of the experience. Yeah,
Speaker 1: poor Claire. I feel bad, Like, of course Claire is like,
Speaker 1: waits years to be bachelor. It should becomes a bachelorette,
Speaker 1: and then a pandemic hits and it's like, oh, god's
Speaker 1: poor woman can't catch a break. Well, I can tell
Speaker 1: you I'm very flattered, but I was never in the
Speaker 1: running to be the bachelorette. So well in the public opinion,
Speaker 1: well thing, um so everybody, like I said, go to
Speaker 1: Elise's Instagram where you can check out her makeup company
Speaker 1: called Glamour Grasp l l C Again Thursday, What a
Speaker 1: Girl Wants podcast. You can get it wherever you get podcasts.
Speaker 1: It will be on this help my second dating podcast feed.
Speaker 1: Check it out. Elise will be on there. She's fantastic. Elise,
Speaker 1: thank you so much for joining on. If Ashley and
Speaker 1: I always say that we want to go to Scottsdale,
Speaker 1: so if we're ever there post COVID, we'd love to.
Speaker 1: I'd love to meet you in person and grab dinner sometime.
Speaker 1: Come on down. Just make sure it's not June and July,
Speaker 1: because I'm too redheaded to be outside those months. All right, guys,
Speaker 1: thank you so much, and thanks for letting me take
Speaker 1: over for a little bit. No, it would be great. Yeah,
Speaker 1: I'm fume to listen to it, all right, thanks guys.
Speaker 1: So Sunday today or yesterday, depending on when you're listening
Speaker 1: to this is National Call your Mother in Law Day.
Speaker 1: So guess what I'm about to do, ladies and gentlemen,
Speaker 1: suck army. I'm going to call Ashley's mother a k a. Audrey,
Speaker 1: a k a. My mother in law as soon as
Speaker 1: I find her number on here. She is aware that
Speaker 1: I will be calling her. Uh she my wife just
Speaker 1: screamed from the bathroom. Tell them that she's shy. My
Speaker 1: mother in law is a little shy, but she's been
Speaker 1: on podcast before, she's been on your podcast before, ash
Speaker 1: So here we go National Call your mother in Law,
Speaker 1: So everybody out there listening, make sure you call your
Speaker 1: mother in law. Tell them how great they are, unless
Speaker 1: they're not great. I don't say that, but mine's great, great, lucky.
Speaker 1: Here we go Audrey. Hello, it's Jared host of help.
Speaker 1: I suck at dating. How are you? I'm doing well.
Speaker 1: Thanks for doing this, Audrey. I appreciate it. I didn't
Speaker 1: I didn't know there was a national call your mother
Speaker 1: in law day. Have you ever heard of this? I've
Speaker 1: never heard of it until like ten minutes ago. On. Oh,
Speaker 1: so Ashley just said that you have to call Bobby. Oh, okay,
Speaker 1: I'll do that. Yeah, that's the that's the only right
Speaker 1: thing to do. Uh. I've never heard of that before.
Speaker 1: Neither have I. So for everybody listening, Bubby is uh
Speaker 1: Ashley's dad's it's Ashley's grandmother on her dad's side. So
Speaker 1: your mother in law, Audrey, Yes, I've had for many years.
Speaker 1: I will say so, Audrey Howard forty years. Well, Bubby
Speaker 1: is doing very well. Bubby's a wise cracker. So, Audrey,
Speaker 1: how am I as a son in law? Be honest?
Speaker 1: Oh boy, that's a big question, the honest truth. Maybe
Speaker 1: obviously you're great. You know that, Audrey, You're great if
Speaker 1: you could, um, you know, be at our house for
Speaker 1: what was it, thirteen weeks? Yeah, quarantine? Yeah, and put
Speaker 1: up with us. I mean I think that that was
Speaker 1: a real test of you know how how great you are. Well,
Speaker 1: thank you all. We really couldn't be happier. Well, I'm
Speaker 1: the lucky ones. I remember when I first met you, guys,
Speaker 1: I thought you were going to hate me because well
Speaker 1: because when I first met both you and Jay was
Speaker 1: during the charity event that Ashley organized rate after our
Speaker 1: first season of Paradise nationally and I weren't weren't dating
Speaker 1: at this point, and all you knew from me was
Speaker 1: that I pretty much broke up with your daughter on
Speaker 1: national television. And I'm like, they're They're gonna don't I
Speaker 1: can't believe I'm going to this. They're gonna hate me
Speaker 1: and you both. I'll never forget both you and Jay
Speaker 1: were so welcoming and so sweet and so nice, and
Speaker 1: it really you just made me feel at home. Well
Speaker 1: before we could not hold that against you, of course, no,
Speaker 1: you could have. You easily could have, and you would
Speaker 1: have been in the right because I was an idiot obviously,
Speaker 1: But it all worked out. And uh yeah, we were
Speaker 1: quarantined for thirteen weeks together, So if we survived that,
Speaker 1: I'm pretty sure we could survive anything. Well, You're you
Speaker 1: were very helpful and uh, I think I think we
Speaker 1: had a nice time. I think it was a good
Speaker 1: bonding experience. Um. You know you made it pretty easy.
Speaker 1: You really, you weren't difficult at all. You're very easy
Speaker 1: going and very hopeful, and your parents raised you very well. H. Well,
Speaker 1: thank you, Audrey. Well you raised Ashley and Lauren very well. Um.
Speaker 1: And I appreciate you saying that I'm easy going because
Speaker 1: I think Ashley would argue with that, but it doesn't
Speaker 1: matter because your mom said it, Ashley, and if your
Speaker 1: mom said it, I am easy going. Um. Audrey, Yeah,
Speaker 1: you're pretty easy going as long as you can put
Speaker 1: up with Ashley, which is not easy. As we know. Um,
Speaker 1: I think you guys bounced each other out and we
Speaker 1: can ask for a better son in law. Well, thank you, Audrey.
Speaker 1: I only have to put up with Ashley for um,
Speaker 1: the rest of my life, so it's not that bad. Um. Actually,
Speaker 1: half as well as we treat Lowis, that's hard. Lois
Speaker 1: gets a lot of love from her dad. Um. Well, Audrey,
Speaker 1: you are the best. I am the extremely lucky ones
Speaker 1: to have incredible in laws. Uh and uh. I love
Speaker 1: you both, and thank you so much for joining me
Speaker 1: on the podcast. As Weird as that sounds. Yeah, I'm
Speaker 1: happy to be on. Thank you very much. I know, right,
Speaker 1: all right, we'll tell Bubby. I said, Hi, okay, alright, bye,
Speaker 1: and that's my mother in law. Ladies and gentlemen. That
Speaker 1: was very nice. Audrey's the best, She's the sweetest. Um.
Speaker 1: She puts up with all my madness. She put up
Speaker 1: with me when I wasn't with Ashley, which is a
Speaker 1: testament to how wonderful they are because I've I've always
Speaker 1: felt this way and I continue to feel this way.
Speaker 1: They could have easily um kind of not been nice
Speaker 1: to me and told Ashley not to date me because
Speaker 1: of everything that happened in the past. But they were
Speaker 1: always supportive. I always got along with them. I always
Speaker 1: fell at home with my in laws, and so I'm
Speaker 1: glad that I called them on National Call your mother
Speaker 1: in law day, Jared, I want to discuss something with
Speaker 1: you that we did not get the chance to discuss
Speaker 1: last week. With a heavy heart, that I approach you
Speaker 1: with this topic. It didn't. Things just didn't pan out
Speaker 1: as I had hoped for them too. And Uh, as
Speaker 1: much as I needed Singletary to go off, he just
Speaker 1: he just decided not to go off. So I lost
Speaker 1: to you in the fantasy football and I need to
Speaker 1: pay my dues because of it. That's right. I completely
Speaker 1: forgot about that. So we we talked about this on
Speaker 1: the podcast a couple of weeks ago. We announced it
Speaker 1: on Instagram. Dean and I played each other in fantasy football.
Speaker 1: Dean lost. It was a good game, though he also traded.
Speaker 1: We had a trade between Dan and I that I
Speaker 1: I definitely won. Uh. So your punishment, sir, I figured
Speaker 1: i'd give you the choice. I would narrow it down
Speaker 1: to two. So this I asked on Instagram what the
Speaker 1: punishment should be. I got a lot of great eight
Speaker 1: great punishments. Uh. Some was eat a pack of sardines
Speaker 1: covered in pickle juice. Um temporary hair dye in the
Speaker 1: winning team's colors. So you'd have to dye your hair
Speaker 1: blue and silver or red and brown. If I'm going
Speaker 1: with Brady. Uh, the top two by far, and I'll
Speaker 1: let you choose which one you want. Okay, one I
Speaker 1: take over your Instagram for a day. I don't think
Speaker 1: whatever the next one is ill, it's just gonna The
Speaker 1: second one is a little less harsh, but something that
Speaker 1: you've been very much against and we actually had a
Speaker 1: sneak preview of it in the beginning of this episode,
Speaker 1: which of course Kalen on for the full episode. I'm
Speaker 1: on the episode two and I get to talk to
Speaker 1: Kalin questions. You can be on there if you want.
Speaker 1: It's I'm not saying you don't have to be on
Speaker 1: this episode, but it's one of the two. Either Kalin's
Speaker 1: on for a full episode and like it's a Q
Speaker 1: and A, or I take over your Instagram for a day.
Speaker 1: What a freaking punishment. My biggest punishment is having my
Speaker 1: girlfriend come on the podcast with me for an hour.
Speaker 1: People want to hear first of my arm How horrible? No,
Speaker 1: I know, it's just funny. Like that's the punishment where
Speaker 1: it's like I always have to talk to my girlfriend.
Speaker 1: You want to know what's funny? Is almost just like
Speaker 1: out of out of spite. I want to say, just
Speaker 1: take over my Instagram. Uh, but I have I have
Speaker 1: been uh thinking about having Caln come on the podcast anyways,
Speaker 1: and because of that, I think it would be great
Speaker 1: to have her on. So it might not be next week,
Speaker 1: it might be the week after that or wherever, but yes,
Speaker 1: I think that if you want to you can be
Speaker 1: like the moderator for a podcast. I mean, calin only
Speaker 1: if and I know, like they're what I'm this is
Speaker 1: your punishment. There's no stipulations on your behalf. It's fine.
Speaker 1: It's fine only if the reverse is given to me
Speaker 1: from you. So you and Ashley come on the pod cast.
Speaker 1: But I get to play. I didn't lose fantasy football.
Speaker 1: I don't know how this there's I don't I'm not
Speaker 1: getting punished. I don't have to have Ashley come on.
Speaker 1: This is you're punishment. It's not a punishment. It's just
Speaker 1: that it's a great way for our listeners and our
Speaker 1: fans and our friends to hear from you and Ashley.
Speaker 1: We always see actually come into the glam Room mid podcast.
Speaker 1: It would be a good chance to actually have a
Speaker 1: sit down conversation. Well here's the thing. I mean, like
Speaker 1: some people, even even you know, they sent in recommendations
Speaker 1: and they said, sure, have the significant other come on
Speaker 1: the podcast, but make sure that they tell embarrassing stories.
Speaker 1: So like I might, I might ask Caitlin to like
Speaker 1: think of one of you, the more embarrassing stories that
Speaker 1: you guys, that you have had during your date. So alright, perfect,
Speaker 1: the punishment is set. Kalin is going to come on
Speaker 1: the podcast. I'm very excited about this. I actually think
Speaker 1: I might have Ashley come on just to ask her questions,
Speaker 1: because Ashley really gets the juicy gossip, you know what
Speaker 1: I mean. She does a better job than I she does.
Speaker 1: Ashley has no shame in her question asking. She just
Speaker 1: gets right to the nitty gritty of the question that
Speaker 1: people always want to like, even more of a punishment
Speaker 1: for you. Yeah, exactly, it's settled. That's done. Calin will
Speaker 1: be on the podcast. Obviously, she has to approve and
Speaker 1: accept the offer to come on the podcast. I'm not
Speaker 1: gonna make her come on the podcast against her will,
Speaker 1: but tentatively that that is that is, that is the settlement.
Speaker 1: He will be on the podcast in the coming weeks.
Speaker 1: But we do have a very special segment coming up because,
Speaker 1: as you mentioned at the top of the podcast, and
Speaker 1: as we've had discussions on the podcast in the past,
Speaker 1: one of our producers, Becky, is dating a very handsome,
Speaker 1: very charismatic, very outgoing gentleman by the name of de Mario,
Speaker 1: if I'm not mistaken, and he is finally coming to
Speaker 1: Los Angeles, where Becky lives. And he will be taking
Speaker 1: her on a date, multiple dates. I can only imagine. Uh,
Speaker 1: question Beckins, Becky, if you're listening, which I think you are,
Speaker 1: are you excited? A B What are you guys gonna do? See?
Speaker 1: Where will you be going? D? Is this the first
Speaker 1: time you guys have seen each other three dimensionally? Because
Speaker 1: I think it is. Um, Okay, that was a lot
Speaker 1: of questions. Um, I am excited, I'm nervous. I have
Speaker 1: a rough idea of what we're going to be doing,
Speaker 1: but I honestly need your guys as health Um, because
Speaker 1: I feel like my ideas are subpar right now? Well
Speaker 1: I have I have. So here's the question. So tomorrow,
Speaker 1: where where's he live again? In Michigan? You know, Michigan?
Speaker 1: This first time ever going to the West coast. Um, so,
Speaker 1: never been in l A, California. And how long is
Speaker 1: he staying for? Uh? He is just here for three days?
Speaker 1: And then is he staying with you? No, he has
Speaker 1: his own hotel room. Good job both parties, Good job,
Speaker 1: Very good question, very good question. And I was actually
Speaker 1: one of my main questions too. This is the first
Speaker 1: time we're meeting in person. How long have guys been talking? Now?
Speaker 1: It's been over a little over a month, all right,
Speaker 1: So here's the question. Because usually Da Mario. First of all, sweetheart,
Speaker 1: he seems like the man. I I feel like he's
Speaker 1: going to come in with a little bit of a plan,
Speaker 1: even though he doesn't know LA, never been on the
Speaker 1: West Coast. Like he just feels like the type of
Speaker 1: guy who's going to make recommendations for you because he
Speaker 1: wants to be, you know, the guy, and he wants
Speaker 1: to show you a good time. He's coming there for you.
Speaker 1: I think it's awesome. But he's flying out to l A.
Speaker 1: That's crazy. I know, it's so crazy. I so I
Speaker 1: keep asking him like, is there anything you want to
Speaker 1: see I've always wanted to see? And of course he's
Speaker 1: just like, I'm just excited to be doing whatever it
Speaker 1: is with you. So just it thought like you tell me,
Speaker 1: I don't know, and I'm like, okay. It's a lot
Speaker 1: of pressure just to refresh the listeners too, because last
Speaker 1: time we spoke to we actually had a conversation with
Speaker 1: to Mario, much to Becky's chagrin because she did not
Speaker 1: love the conversation. Well, I think that you secretly gained
Speaker 1: some stuff out of it. But maybe you didn't like
Speaker 1: You didn't like to right right right, you didn't love
Speaker 1: some of the questions that we were asking. We were
Speaker 1: growing him a little bit. That's our job. We're like
Speaker 1: your big brother. Okay, we are. I do feel responsible
Speaker 1: in some weird way for this. Uh he turned this skeptic.
Speaker 1: I was very very skeptical of Damorrow going into the conversation,
Speaker 1: But I came out of that conversation basically want wanting
Speaker 1: to break up with Klin and asked tomorrow to be
Speaker 1: my boyfriend instead. Um, so I'm excited to see what happens.
Speaker 1: I think it's been a great it's been a great
Speaker 1: like unfolding of events. Like he listened to the podcast
Speaker 1: because he's also a fan of scrubbing In and almost Famous.
Speaker 1: He heard Becky speak and he just became immediately enamored
Speaker 1: with her voice, and then they just kind of struck
Speaker 1: up a relationship since then. I think it's like imagine
Speaker 1: telling your grandkids about how grandma and grandpa met, you
Speaker 1: know what I mean, just a beautiful genesis story. Yeah,
Speaker 1: that's amazing, Becky. I mean, do you have any ideas?
Speaker 1: So I would suggest like going down, you gotta go
Speaker 1: like down south. You gotta I feel like you gotta
Speaker 1: get out of l A. Like you gotta go to
Speaker 1: like Manhattan Beach or you know, somewhere by the water.
Speaker 1: Really show him, like the you know, the Pacific coast.
Speaker 1: That would be my suggestion, like somewhere out you know,
Speaker 1: because you can still go out to eat, like outdoor
Speaker 1: dining is fine something like that. But then I don't know,
Speaker 1: like there's no activities, Like I feel like you guys
Speaker 1: have been talking for so long. The last thing you
Speaker 1: really want to do is just like keep talking. I
Speaker 1: feel like it would be more fun if you did something.
Speaker 1: What the hell are you guys gonna do? You can't
Speaker 1: like go bowling, I know. I was like maybe there's
Speaker 1: like I think there's some arcades open, like that seems
Speaker 1: kind of fun. There's like, um, I don't know, I
Speaker 1: feel like you can just drive around in l A.
Speaker 1: It's still hard, Like how do you date, go on
Speaker 1: dates and cope during COVID? So we do. So the
Speaker 1: one thing he definitely wanted to do was take me
Speaker 1: out to dinner the first thing he gets here. So
Speaker 1: I made reservations for that. Um at Laurel Hardware over
Speaker 1: and less Okay, Yeah, they have a great outdoor dining area,
Speaker 1: so that's nice. So but that's really it. Like some
Speaker 1: lookout cool lookout points like by the beach, like you
Speaker 1: can do like what about hiking? Yeah, we could do that.
Speaker 1: You could do like Laurel Canyon, or you could do
Speaker 1: like you could take them up to like Griffith Park.
Speaker 1: Ashley and I do sometimes picnics up there. They're very nice.
Speaker 1: Uh yeah, well because we we she was inspired by
Speaker 1: La La Land because that's one of my favorite movies.
Speaker 1: So we went up there. She wore a yellow dress.
Speaker 1: It was fantastic, just like I'm a Stone in the movie. Um,
Speaker 1: what else could you guys do? It's so hard right
Speaker 1: now because I would say, I think you should think
Speaker 1: of like some sort of activity to do as well.
Speaker 1: And I know that's difficult now because of COVID, but
Speaker 1: you guys have talked so much and it's undoubtedly going
Speaker 1: to be a little awkward because you guys have never
Speaker 1: met and you talked for so long. I think dinner
Speaker 1: is great to continue talking and like get that vibe
Speaker 1: in person. But I also think it would be really
Speaker 1: nice of you guys were actively doing something together to
Speaker 1: kind of like, you know, get some laughs in there,
Speaker 1: joke around. I don't know, I just that's how I'm feeling. No,
Speaker 1: I agree, and I'm just like what does what does
Speaker 1: that mean? Like? What what is that activity? So that's
Speaker 1: where I'm stuck. So if any listeners have any ideas,
Speaker 1: any of the listeners out there, obviously email us with
Speaker 1: suggestions that you have for Becky on where she should
Speaker 1: go with tomorrow what should they do? Also, you can
Speaker 1: d m us on the help I second dating Instagram.
Speaker 1: I am here for all of it, and I know
Speaker 1: Becky is too. I think he nailed on the head.
Speaker 1: You definitely like, are gonna go to Laurel Hardware. That's
Speaker 1: gonna be fantastic. But it's also like you should just
Speaker 1: go to the beach for an entire day, like spend
Speaker 1: like four hours on the beach in like Venice or
Speaker 1: Santa Monica. You can't really hit like the Santa Monica
Speaker 1: appear per se. I have a request if you're willing, Becky,
Speaker 1: only if you're willing, no pressure, but maybe we could
Speaker 1: double date and Jared, if you're down, maybe we could
Speaker 1: all triple date. I think that would be pretty fun,
Speaker 1: just like a nice little like beach excursion. Uh, and
Speaker 1: like go to a restaurant for like lunch or something
Speaker 1: like that, just to just a suggestion, you know, I
Speaker 1: just I kind of want to hang out with you guys. Becky.
Speaker 1: What's funny enough is we always have these digital interactions
Speaker 1: to each other, but we've actually never met you in person,
Speaker 1: So it would be a good chance for Jared and
Speaker 1: I to also get to know you and to Mario better.
Speaker 1: It's just a suggestion if you're down for it, no pressure,
Speaker 1: We get to thrill your future husband, Ashley and I
Speaker 1: can talk about how we're family planning. See if you
Speaker 1: guys are on the same page, you know, really just
Speaker 1: put the pressure on. I think that's a great idea
Speaker 1: and I'm here for it. No pressure, no pressure, no
Speaker 1: preshould also look up Halloween things to do. I wonder
Speaker 1: if there's like fun Halloween, like I know they must
Speaker 1: have like drive through pumpkin things that could be something fun, festive, timely. Also, Uh,
Speaker 1: I never suggest going to a movie on a first date,
Speaker 1: but seeing how there's limited options, maybe a drive in. Yeah,
Speaker 1: there's like there's like all these like old school drive
Speaker 1: ins in l A that showed old movies that could
Speaker 1: be fun if you guys like watched if they showed like,
Speaker 1: what's like a good love story the Princess Bride, Like
Speaker 1: if they showed that on a drive in or when
Speaker 1: Harry met Sally, I think that's great. I love these
Speaker 1: corny days, honestly, I think they're great. Thank you guys
Speaker 1: for your help, and I'm so I'm really excited. For sure,
Speaker 1: we're excited for you. First of all, what help are
Speaker 1: you thinking us for? Because I feel like we did
Speaker 1: not accomplish a single cush darn thing. No, you guys did.
Speaker 1: There were some good ideas. There was the hiking, there
Speaker 1: was a drive in, there was the picnic, there was
Speaker 1: the Halloween stuff, like, all great ideas. So the wheels
Speaker 1: are turning. We're going to figure something out. And I
Speaker 1: like the beach idea because he's from Michigan, so it's
Speaker 1: definitely not around wheel beaches over there. Yeah, showing the Pacific,
Speaker 1: just big lakes. Yes. Uh, well, we're obviously gonna have
Speaker 1: to follow up on this and and see how this
Speaker 1: date went again, just to add more pressure to it.
Speaker 1: But you know what, you guys met through help by
Speaker 1: second dating. Uh, it's only poetic to figure out if
Speaker 1: if you guys are gonna get married because of help?
Speaker 1: I second dating? UM, so tomorrow, if you're listening, you're awesome,
Speaker 1: very excited for you both say travels uh and let's
Speaker 1: before we leave, let's do emails and a dating term. So, Mark,
Speaker 1: are you are you listening? I don't know, you poor bastard.
Speaker 1: You have to listen to like us, just ramped the
Speaker 1: entire time. I am here and enjoying every word, just
Speaker 1: like I do every week. Oh yeah, I'm sure. Just
Speaker 1: what a guy waiting at on bated breath for what
Speaker 1: we're gonna say next? So would you like to read
Speaker 1: the email we have today? We have one? Definitely do.
Speaker 1: It's from Emily, my X and I have two years
Speaker 1: just broke up. The breakup was very mutual. We realized
Speaker 1: that we were growing apart. During our two years of dating.
Speaker 1: I got close to his younger sister. She became one
Speaker 1: of my closest friends. Do you think it would be
Speaker 1: weird if I remained friends with his sister? We are
Speaker 1: all in our mad twenties. No, I don't think, And
Speaker 1: that's another episode of helping UM. I think I don't
Speaker 1: think it's weird. I think as long as everybody's okay
Speaker 1: with it, uh, one of two things will happen. Either, uh,
Speaker 1: you know, you and this X will just not really
Speaker 1: converse all that much and you'll move on with your lives.
Speaker 1: Or it will be super awkward and unfortunately your friendship
Speaker 1: with the sister is going to fade over time. I
Speaker 1: think that will probably one of the two things that
Speaker 1: will happen. I don't think it's weird at all. I
Speaker 1: think that, uh, it's perfectly normal to become friends with
Speaker 1: a significant others sibling. And also, let's say you broke up,
Speaker 1: you obviously broke up, but it was, as you put it,
Speaker 1: mutual and amicable whatever. I think that just as the
Speaker 1: fact that it's totally okay. On top of that, when
Speaker 1: I think about like some of my best friends, who
Speaker 1: I would I think they all have siblings. But the
Speaker 1: point is I never see any other siblings because they're
Speaker 1: my friends. Their siblings aren't my friends. So it's like,
Speaker 1: if your ex boyfriend's sister and you are really good friends,
Speaker 1: you can still see the sister constantly without kind of
Speaker 1: running into your ex boyfriend. Uh, it might be a
Speaker 1: little tricky, I would say, but I don't think that
Speaker 1: you should like cut off a friendship just because you
Speaker 1: were no longer romantically and twined with her brother. I
Speaker 1: think we all agree on this. I was just trying
Speaker 1: to expand on it a little bit more. You know,
Speaker 1: I'm curious if they all if the brother and sister
Speaker 1: are still live at home, that might make it a
Speaker 1: little bit awkward, But otherwise, my only advice is to
Speaker 1: not sneak around, be honest and open and above board
Speaker 1: on everything. If you start sneaking around and he finds
Speaker 1: out your friends, it's gonna be very weird and uncomfortable
Speaker 1: and negative feelings. So as long as you're open with everybody,
Speaker 1: I should go for it. One of my closest friends
Speaker 1: is my sister's ex boyfriend, and uh, he was in
Speaker 1: my wedding. He was one of my groomsmen. She was
Speaker 1: in my wedding too, and they don't speak to each other.
Speaker 1: But everything is fine. They're all they're all fine with it.
Speaker 1: Did she ever get mad at you? No, No, she
Speaker 1: she doesn't get mad at me. But every now and again,
Speaker 1: like if I'm talking to her and I'll be like,
Speaker 1: oh yeah, Andy, and I went into this, she'd be
Speaker 1: like she like rolls her eyes, but like she didn't
Speaker 1: even had about it. She's a good person. Wait, that's
Speaker 1: actually really that's really funny and a funny account firsthand,
Speaker 1: because obviously we wouldn't have another one. So I've got
Speaker 1: more questions too. So they don't they don't speak. They
Speaker 1: were both in your wedding, But I mean, I guess
Speaker 1: I don't have any questions. I just wanted to talk
Speaker 1: about that. It's actual hilarious. It's more of a statement
Speaker 1: than anything else. I do find that pretty interesting East
Speaker 1: And I mean, how did so you guys were just
Speaker 1: so close to you felt like that even after your
Speaker 1: sister broke up with them, like you had to just
Speaker 1: stay friends. Yeah? Yeah, they dated for like three years,
Speaker 1: they lived together and everything, and then um, they just
Speaker 1: they just grew apart and decided to break up. And
Speaker 1: I came to her and I was like, hey, Andy
Speaker 1: and I are really close, Like would it would it
Speaker 1: bother you if I stayed friends them? And She's like,
Speaker 1: knock yourself out? How close a friends are you? Like
Speaker 1: like I would say, like I have like two very
Speaker 1: close friends. It's just it's Andy and this this other guy,
Speaker 1: like he's I'd say he's one of my best friends.
Speaker 1: And how long have been broken up for? They've been
Speaker 1: broken up for seven years? Yeah, wow, so the friendships
Speaker 1: ridly So that's lasted. So so I mean Emily, I
Speaker 1: mean Eastern's firsthand. You can stay friends with your ex
Speaker 1: as long as everybody's on the same page and you're
Speaker 1: upfront about it and honest. Excess sibling, excess siblings. I
Speaker 1: have a question for you this time, an actual question,
Speaker 1: not just the stupid statement. Uh, are your is your
Speaker 1: sister in a relationship now? Or is Andy in a
Speaker 1: relationship and she is engaged and my sister is married? Yeah? Yeah, okay,
Speaker 1: so do you think even now then when like, let's
Speaker 1: say you're talking to your sister about Andy, your sister
Speaker 1: is married, and then does she still like do the
Speaker 1: I all things? Or is it kind of one of
Speaker 1: those things where it's like bygones, bygones, like move on
Speaker 1: sort of thing. This is how chill we are, Okay, guys. Uh,
Speaker 1: my sister's new husband, he's a he and I are
Speaker 1: cool too, they were, but he was in my wedding too,
Speaker 1: like so my my groomsmen. It was like a couple
Speaker 1: of buddies of mine from high school, and then my
Speaker 1: sister's ex boyfriend and my sister's current husband. We all
Speaker 1: got all on great. We all went out and like
Speaker 1: son like hung out and did stuff. Lean up to
Speaker 1: the wedding and everyone got along. It was it was
Speaker 1: totally fine. Well, it's very nice to hear everybody was
Speaker 1: very mature about it, as they should be. Exact. We're
Speaker 1: all adults, you know, and somewhat it's hard for me
Speaker 1: to make friends. I need to hang on these people's
Speaker 1: hard as like you know, yeah, we're we're all adults
Speaker 1: with superhero posters on our wall. I get it right there. Um,
Speaker 1: all right, So I have one dating term before we go,
Speaker 1: because obviously that's our new thing. We have to at
Speaker 1: least do one dating term to find it, figure out
Speaker 1: what it is. This is what it is? Dating term
Speaker 1: October twenty three or whatever the hell they we're recording
Speaker 1: this dating term? Fired orring, fire dooring? What is it?
Speaker 1: Ladies and gentlemen, even though it's just dudes on this,
Speaker 1: I know what it is. I know what it is.
Speaker 1: Fire dooring is when you so when there's a fire
Speaker 1: in a building, the first thing that you do when
Speaker 1: you approach a doorway, is you check the knob to
Speaker 1: see if there's a heat in the door knob. If
Speaker 1: there's heat, there's fire on the other side. If it's
Speaker 1: not hot, there's snow fire on the other side. Fire
Speaker 1: dooring is you're like checking, You're like testing the water.
Speaker 1: Is You're like you're like, you know, tapping the door
Speaker 1: knob to see if it's worth opening the door or not.
Speaker 1: I disagree, top fat gentleman. I think that fire dooring
Speaker 1: is like at the at the first sign of danger,
Speaker 1: like like a first sign is something going wrong, like
Speaker 1: a small fight or a little disagreement, you head for
Speaker 1: the hills, like just you the fire doors come down,
Speaker 1: you lock yourself off. You you probably just ghost them.
Speaker 1: That's what I think it is. Yeah, mine is similar.
Speaker 1: It's an extreme ghost just like mid date, he's just like,
Speaker 1: oh something, I didn't like what she just said, and
Speaker 1: he hits the check please by. It's an extreme urgent ghosting.
Speaker 1: I really wish it was that, because that's hysterical, sad,
Speaker 1: but quite funny. Uh. Fire dooring, well, we all know
Speaker 1: what a fire door is because it only opens from
Speaker 1: one side. So this is a one sided relationship. You
Speaker 1: can get out, but you can't get back in. This
Speaker 1: is an unequal relationship where one person has all the
Speaker 1: power and a connection. They may or may not reply
Speaker 1: to your text or agree to your request to meet them.
Speaker 1: When you do hear from them, it's usually because they
Speaker 1: want something from you and it's convenient for them, and
Speaker 1: they expect you to drop everything to suit them. This
Speaker 1: is an unhealthy power dynamic that can leave you unsatisfied
Speaker 1: and frustrated. Fire dooring. I've I know some relationships like that.
Speaker 1: It's not good. It's not that one though, that's pretty good.
Speaker 1: You know what, they were all good guesses. I love
Speaker 1: the effort. That's what really counts. Thank you so much, everybody,
Speaker 1: suck Army for tuning in. You guys are the best.
Speaker 1: Thank you to a Lease Dell Bomb for joining us.
Speaker 1: Make sure you tune in this Thursday for What a
Speaker 1: Girl Wants, What a Girl Needs. Thanks for leaving me
Speaker 1: hanging their fils uh her. What a Girl Wants podcast
Speaker 1: drops on Thursday. Make sure you check it out. Of course.
Speaker 1: Thank you to our producer Becky for dating Tomorroo and
Speaker 1: giving us content. I'm very excited to see what happens
Speaker 1: with this relationship. I'm very excited to see what kind
Speaker 1: of dates you go on. Uh and I think that's it, right, Dean.
Speaker 1: Thank you for being the most wonderful human being. Thank
Speaker 1: you to Calin for coming on. Yeah, I'm excited to
Speaker 1: have a full conversation with Klin again. I don't know when,
Speaker 1: maybe next week, maybe the week after that, but one
Speaker 1: of these days it's gonna be good because it's your punishment.
Speaker 1: I feel like we should like spring it upon you
Speaker 1: like I should. I should be the one scheduling when
Speaker 1: Caitlin comes on and you have no idea, how could
Speaker 1: be this week, could be, next week, could be four
Speaker 1: months from now? Who the hell notes Listen, if you
Speaker 1: want to take that into your own hands and get
Speaker 1: that done, I think you're right. It would only make
Speaker 1: it more hilarious and funny and interesting and cool. So
Speaker 1: I don't want to put that burden on you. But uh, well,
Speaker 1: we'll discuss, we'll figure it out exactly. But I'm glad
Speaker 1: that I'm glad that a that I'm paying my dues
Speaker 1: because I did lose and I deserve to be punished.
Speaker 1: I'm glad that we were able to settle on something
Speaker 1: and figure it out, and I'm glad that all of
Speaker 1: you guys are in my life. So so I guess
Speaker 1: that's all I got. Oh well deep, oh well, my
Speaker 1: dogs freaking out, but we're very lucky to have you
Speaker 1: in our life. In Dan, you want to sign us off. Yeah, well,
Speaker 1: Jared's dogs freak out over there. By the way, I
Speaker 1: just texted Jared this, but I think it's worth noting
Speaker 1: on the podcast as well. Jared, I don't know what
Speaker 1: you're doing, man, but you're looking good. You're looking fit.
Speaker 1: You've always had a strong job, but for some reason
Speaker 1: it's just popping even more now like you. Maybe it's
Speaker 1: the hair. I just want the listeners to know, I
Speaker 1: know what are listening to this podcast. We're not seeing
Speaker 1: you don't You're not seeing what I'm seeing. But this,
Speaker 1: man is you're like a fine one. You're getting better
Speaker 1: with agents did I just looked at my phone and
Speaker 1: I see a text message from Dean says, Hey, not
Speaker 1: to be weird or anything, but if you've been working out, Dean,
Speaker 1: I very much appreciate it. I've been working out a
Speaker 1: little bit. I think it's really the hair and the
Speaker 1: light and going to be honest, But anyway, Thank you
Speaker 1: for tuning in. Be sure to tune in next week
Speaker 1: for a great episode. Uh, what's funny is we can
Speaker 1: consistently tease Kalin's appearance. Maybe she'll be on next week.
Speaker 1: Maybe you should be on the week after that. The
Speaker 1: only way to find out is by tuning in and
Speaker 1: seeing if we suck just a little bit less. Follow
Speaker 1: help by Suck at Dating on I Heart Radio or
Speaker 1: wherever you listen to podcast