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Speaker 1: Wind Down with Janet Kramer and Michael Kaufman and I'm

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Speaker 1: her radio podcasts.

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Speaker 2: All right, I'm excited for today's show because I want

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Speaker 2: to have a debate with you and actually everyone here.

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Speaker 2: I'm probably gonna lose, but that's fine. It is it

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Speaker 2: just because you knew I was going to lose.

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Speaker 3: I can't wait for this debate. I don't even know

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Speaker 3: what it's about.

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Speaker 2: So we have a guest today from Bling Empires, Sharie,

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Speaker 2: And you know, I was kind of reading her background

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Speaker 2: and you watched Blaning Empire, and you know, the background

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Speaker 2: that I've heard from her is, you know, she proposed

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Speaker 2: to her to her husband, and you know, they also

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Speaker 2: went out of the traditions of the Asian culture, so

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Speaker 2: you know, they had kids first before they got married.

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Speaker 2: And it kind of leads me to traditions and what

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Speaker 2: is expected of you and Wenning laughing.

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Speaker 3: I don't know. I'm just anxious to see where this goes.

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Speaker 2: Well, so, okay, so it's like, you know, traditions and

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Speaker 2: where it's what's expected you when you're in you know,

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Speaker 2: you go to school and then you go to college,

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Speaker 2: and then you get a job and then it's like

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Speaker 2: that is what you're supposed to do. And you know,

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Speaker 2: I don't know if we've touched on this before in

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Speaker 2: the podcast, and I think we probably have, but it

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Speaker 2: just leads to, you know, why do we all have

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Speaker 2: to follow that same mold? And as parents we have

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Speaker 2: polar opposites of what that mold looks like. And you know,

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Speaker 2: I kind of fear where that's gonna maybe cost some

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Speaker 2: tension when the kids get older, because even you know

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Speaker 2: I will say this too. I mean I potentially might

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Speaker 2: be filming a movie in August and if there's quarantine stuff,

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Speaker 2: I mean Jolie, because Michael is very much like, you

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Speaker 2: will not miss like, okay, there's eight days that Jolie

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Speaker 2: can miss in school, and I'm like, she can miss

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Speaker 2: a month, Like it's fine, we'll bring the paperwork home,

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Speaker 2: we can do the homework. And Michael's like, she will

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Speaker 2: not miss a day.

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Speaker 3: And I'm like, not that she won't miss a day.

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Speaker 3: But it's like, when they get into organize school, you

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Speaker 3: can't just be like, all right, well I got to

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Speaker 3: shoot for three weeks. Let's bring a whole family up.

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Speaker 2: That's what football people do, that's what other movie people do.

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Speaker 2: We would unfortunately, have to bring put her in private school.

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Speaker 2: But that's what that's what you do. The family travels together.

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Speaker 2: So this is just a little cavy like this is

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Speaker 2: a little like peep. Let's put a pin in that one.

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Speaker 3: Get your pope ready, guys, so let's put a.

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Speaker 2: Pin in that one. The big one for me is

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Speaker 2: college because I personally don't feel like you have to

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Speaker 2: go to college. And if it's something where you don't,

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Speaker 2: if it's like, you know, if she wants to be

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Speaker 2: an actress, yeah, think you gotta go to college. There's

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Speaker 2: some great theatrical schools. Sure, but I don't think you

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Speaker 2: need to go to college. And who am I to say?

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Speaker 2: I didn't go to college? So how can I say

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Speaker 2: to my kid you have to do something like when

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Speaker 2: my dad said you have to go to college? I

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Speaker 2: basically eam the finger, drove off in my green Saturn

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Speaker 2: and went to LA.

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Speaker 3: I'm gonna dream dad.

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Speaker 2: But it's like, you know, you're very much like you.

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Speaker 2: You are a very strict traditional This is how it goes.

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Speaker 3: You're putting some words into my mouth.

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Speaker 2: What are you not traditional?

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Speaker 4: On?

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Speaker 3: What I'm saying is, look if they if Joli and

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Speaker 3: Jay's come to us. And they say they don't want

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Speaker 3: to go to college, I'll say, okay, what's your plan?

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Speaker 3: If they have a plan, say they want to be

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Speaker 3: an actor. I want to be an actor. Okay. Have

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Speaker 3: you thought about going to a theater school, a trade school,

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Speaker 3: something specific for that trade?

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Speaker 2: Okay? When if they go? Yeah, but I just want

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Speaker 2: to go out to LA and just start auditioning. And

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Speaker 2: mom has some friends that she can hook me up with.

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Speaker 3: Okay, then I'll say, what job are you going to

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Speaker 3: get in the meantime to help pay your bills while

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Speaker 3: you're out there getting auditions? Did you do you? Are

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Speaker 3: you going to be a waitress? Are you going to

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Speaker 3: be that?

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Speaker 4: Like?

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Speaker 2: What job did you have when you were playing football?

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Speaker 3: Football? Job?

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Speaker 2: But was it what bills?

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Speaker 3: Was it paying all my bills?

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Speaker 2: I'm not talking about NFL. I'm talking about in college.

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Speaker 3: What do you mean you didn't have a job scholarship?

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Speaker 2: I'm no, no, Okay, great, congrats, I'm saying, but did

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Speaker 2: you have a job because you didn't know you're gonna

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Speaker 2: be in the NFL?

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Speaker 3: Yeah, every summer I worked. What's your point here? My

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Speaker 3: point is that like I worked and played football and

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Speaker 3: went to school.

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Speaker 2: I understand that I wouldn't you know me, Like, I'm

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Speaker 2: the kind of person where it's like, hey, you're gonna

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Speaker 2: like they're going to buy their own car with their

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Speaker 2: money that they get from work. Sure, but let them

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Speaker 2: like you don't have to drill them into like, you know,

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Speaker 2: like the last thing you want is like, what are

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Speaker 2: you going to do for work? They got to figure

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Speaker 2: that out.

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Speaker 3: Right, But also our parents, as parents, our job is

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Speaker 3: to put them in the best position to succeed. So

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Speaker 3: we're not just going.

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Speaker 2: To say ever asked me what I was going to

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Speaker 2: do for work when I moved to La I just

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Speaker 2: was like, I have to get a job because I'm

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Speaker 2: eighteen and I've got zero money.

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Speaker 3: Right, But I still want our kids to here. This

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Speaker 3: is about not about tradition. This is about just my

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Speaker 3: personality of being prepared. It's I want you to go

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Speaker 3: and be able to whatever scenario comes your way. You

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Speaker 3: have a response for there's some preparation instead of just

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Speaker 3: flying by the seat of your pants with a life

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Speaker 3: changing decision, be like, ah, we'll see what it pans out.

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Speaker 2: So okay, why don't you apply that to your own life?

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Speaker 2: What do you mean, mister fly By? The seat of

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Speaker 2: the pants. What do you mean that's how you live

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Speaker 2: your life? How can you? How can you say that

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Speaker 2: and then not actually live that? That's That's what I'm saying.

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Speaker 2: You shan't be a hypocrite to your kids.

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Speaker 3: How am I hypocrite?

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Speaker 2: You don't fly? You fly by the seat of your pants? How?

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Speaker 2: How not?

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Speaker 3: How? Please tell me? How?

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Speaker 5: Like?

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Speaker 3: You know?

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Speaker 1: You know?

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Speaker 3: I don't know.

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Speaker 2: You just fly? You don't you just fly? You flutter?

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Speaker 2: You're a flutterer. With our book, you know the schedule,

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Speaker 2: we had a schedule Mark It's like no, I don't know.

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Speaker 2: With the book, we have a schedule and it's like no,

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Speaker 2: the last month ukram everything.

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Speaker 3: That's different than having planned versus how I work better.

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Speaker 2: But one's not living by a plan.

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Speaker 3: No, that's not You're taking it into a different category,

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Speaker 3: different context.

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Speaker 2: I'm just saying.

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Speaker 3: I'm talking about when you're a young adult, they.

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Speaker 2: Have to make yes, and we can say.

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Speaker 3: Right, we help push in the right direction. I'm a

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Speaker 3: grown up.

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Speaker 2: Now, Okay, then I have a question. You said that

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Speaker 2: you were going to buy them their car, and I'm

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Speaker 2: very against that. I think they should work for that.

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Speaker 2: I worked my butt off from my redilero. I got

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Speaker 2: a job when I was fourteen, and then at fifteen

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Speaker 2: I started waitressing, and I bought myself at least a

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Speaker 2: red alaer up. I maybe like signed. You know, my

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Speaker 2: dad signed for it, right, but he didn't pay for it.

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Speaker 2: I worked for it. I paid two hundred bucks a

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Speaker 2: month on that damn thing. So I'm just saying, like.

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Speaker 3: I want to give and guess what if you didn't

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Speaker 3: make the payments? Guess whose credit hurts your dad's.

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Speaker 2: Well, but he knew I would work for it. I

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Speaker 2: just okay, and this might hurt a little bit I

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Speaker 2: have Why are you looking at me? I'm strained in

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Speaker 2: my soul.

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Speaker 3: Let's hear it. We're all waiting.

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Speaker 2: Stop it making me sweat. I think there is Oh

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Speaker 2: my god, No, seriously, I'm just looking at you.

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Speaker 3: No, seriously, No, don't give me that like patronizing tap,

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Speaker 3: Like seriously, come on, I want to hear what you

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Speaker 3: have to say.

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Speaker 2: No, stop, now you're like actually being rude? Now was

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Speaker 2: that because I like being like serious?

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Speaker 3: I'm being serious too.

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Speaker 2: No. I just think if I have spoken to someone

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Speaker 2: who said that sometimes they regret helping because it makes

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Speaker 2: them not be as responsible for or in the value

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Speaker 2: of money. And I think if there's if you're helping

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Speaker 2: your kids too much, it can hurt them in adulthood.

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Speaker 3: Here's what Jane is getting at, because I'll tell you

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Speaker 3: right now it wasn't because yes, my parents always made

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Speaker 3: sure that I could cover my bills if I had

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Speaker 3: a hard time, or food in food in my refrigerator

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Speaker 3: in college or whatever. By no means it was a charity.

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Speaker 3: But whatever my scholarship didn't cover because it really wasn't enough,

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Speaker 3: especially when I was a walk on. They made sure

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Speaker 3: I didn't go hungry. But my devaluing of a dollar

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Speaker 3: didn't come from my parents being there to help me

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Speaker 3: if I needed it. I admittedly say it was from

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Speaker 3: making the money I did in my twenties. And here's

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Speaker 3: I'll say this. I've said this to other people where

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Speaker 3: because you and I are different when it comes to spending,

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Speaker 3: right Like I'm a little bit more Liza Fair, a

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Speaker 3: little bit more open to spending than you are. And

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Speaker 3: we talked about numerous times on here, and I literally

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Speaker 3: contribute that to in your twenties, your power was getting

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Speaker 3: turned off. You're in taketos for dinner like I was.

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Speaker 2: Stealing toilet paper from the wood Ranch Grill in West Hollywood.

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Speaker 3: Right, that was your early twenties. My early twenties, I

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Speaker 3: was making a ridiculous amount of money, especially for early

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Speaker 3: twenty year old So my value of a dollar early

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Speaker 3: after college, I had a different skew on things, and

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Speaker 3: that still affects me now because I was used to

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Speaker 3: being on my own, having money to buy whatever I

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Speaker 3: wanted and just doing it because I could. And so

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Speaker 3: that's where I admit that, that's where my appreciation of

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Speaker 3: a dollar has downgraded is because of that. Not from

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Speaker 3: my parents helping me in a time of need, not

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Speaker 3: from them, you know, helping me at with other things.

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Speaker 3: It came from my experience in my early twenties.

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Speaker 2: I do appreciate you saying that, though, because you've never

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Speaker 2: expressed that to me before that way, Like, you've never

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Speaker 2: you've never So I'm like, and now I'm like, oh,

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Speaker 2: that makes sense now, Like I understand now why you

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Speaker 2: value money different. I've never you've never explained it that

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Speaker 2: way to me. Really, yeah, So I do appreciate you

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Speaker 2: being able to explain it to me like that. Yeah,

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Speaker 2: you know, just yeah, I think, just like to circle back,

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Speaker 2: I think there is just I think there's healthy ways

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Speaker 2: of helping your kids. Like of course, if Jolie and

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Speaker 2: Jace come to me, one thousand percent, I'm going to

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Speaker 2: help them because I like to be able to have

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Speaker 2: the means that my parents didn't have because I had

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Speaker 2: to quit things. You know, I had to quit figure skating,

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Speaker 2: that's something I loved because my parents got divorced. I

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Speaker 2: had my mom had to work three jobs, and I

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Speaker 2: had to work because my parents got divorced. And you know,

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Speaker 2: there was a lot of things that I didn't have,

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Speaker 2: but if I needed it, I had to work for

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Speaker 2: And there's things I wish I could say, like mom,

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Speaker 2: but I will say also when our power was getting

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Speaker 2: my power was getting shut off in La, you know,

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Speaker 2: my mom took money out of her retirement, and when

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Speaker 2: I got really sick in Romania, you know, she took

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Speaker 2: more money out of her retirement and you know, flied,

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Speaker 2: fled me or flew me back home, you know. And

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Speaker 2: so it's like a mother and a father are going

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Speaker 2: to do whatever they are going to do with their

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Speaker 2: for their children, and you know, hopefully we'll continue to

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Speaker 2: have the means to be able to provide I just

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Speaker 2: know the value of not having it. And and but

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Speaker 2: also I will say too, that's affected my relationship with

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Speaker 2: money because I'm so scared to lose it that I

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Speaker 2: become very controlling of it.

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Speaker 4: Right.

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Speaker 2: So I think that's, you know, an aspect that I'm

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Speaker 2: constantly working on because it's it's so scary to be

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Speaker 2: in that situation, because I don't want to ever have

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Speaker 2: to look at, you know, to like I had my

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Speaker 2: two girlfriends, my two best girlfriends from Michigan were in

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Speaker 2: town when I was living in LA and my freaking

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Speaker 2: power turned off, you know, like it's it was embarrassing,

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Speaker 2: like here I am, I moved to LA to be

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Speaker 2: this actress and like my's getting turned off, you know.

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Speaker 2: So I just I just think there's a there is

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Speaker 2: a healthy balance. But I really I want them to

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Speaker 2: know that like they can't just like they gotta do

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Speaker 2: everything they can before they like they know, they'll know

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Speaker 2: that I was there. But I don't want to be

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Speaker 2: like here.

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Speaker 3: No, I agree, And I never said I wanted to

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Speaker 3: be like here, here's this, here's that.

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Speaker 2: But that's a car. And I'll tell and I'll tell

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Speaker 2: you what I will let me, let me do what

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Speaker 2: my grand and so I said, this is what my grandpa.

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Speaker 2: What my grandpa did for my brother was the coolest

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Speaker 2: thing ever. And it's something I've always thought of that

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Speaker 2: I want to do for our kids because we do

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Speaker 2: have them, you know, hopefully by then we have still

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Speaker 2: the means. What my grandpa did for my brother was

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Speaker 2: my my grandpa said, if you want this car, it's

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Speaker 2: my car. You got to pay me. So every two weeks,

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Speaker 2: and my brothers, my brother got you know, two jobs.

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Speaker 2: He paid my brother. He paid my grandpa for this

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Speaker 2: beat up even had a Mary Kay sign on it

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Speaker 2: because my grandma used to sell Mary Kay. And I

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Speaker 2: mean it was just like me and my friends just

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Speaker 2: jump in the back seats because they were the bouncy

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Speaker 2: like just a big old like car. It was a boat. Yeah.

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Speaker 2: But my brother paid my grandpa every two weeks on

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Speaker 2: a schedule, and my grandpa very german structured. He was like,

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Speaker 2: you'll pay me every two weeks. This is how much

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Speaker 2: it's going to be, and by this point it'll be

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Speaker 2: paid off. And so when my brother paid him off,

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Speaker 2: it was like fifteen thousand dollars, which would have been

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Speaker 2: the blue book Kelly blue Book of what the car cost.

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Speaker 2: My grandpa gave him all the money back and said,

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Speaker 2: put this in your bank, and I was just like it.

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Speaker 2: Like to this day, it still gives me chills because

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Speaker 2: I'm like, now that's awesome because he still worked for it,

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Speaker 2: but now it's go put this in your bank. You

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Speaker 2: weren't laid on a payment and now you know, invest

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Speaker 2: in this, Like what a gift. You know that you

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Speaker 2: taught them hard work does pay off, you know, And

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Speaker 2: I just love that, you.

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Speaker 3: Know, And it's there's it's interesting because there's different ways

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Speaker 3: to look at you know. I feel like people, depending

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Speaker 3: on their experiences, they can go one of the one

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Speaker 3: or one or either direction, one of two directions. Where

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Speaker 3: like we have these friends that live across from us,

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Speaker 3: that our neighbors. And he grew up with like I

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Speaker 3: mean food stamps, like barely any food with like Jason.

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Speaker 2: Oh yeah, and Jason our neighbor.

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Speaker 3: Yeah, and like you know, he had like four other

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Speaker 3: siblings and they didn't even know where next meal would

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Speaker 3: come some days. So now him and his wife they

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Speaker 3: make a little money and he'll like over buy groceries

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Speaker 3: because he never wants his kids to ever have to

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Speaker 3: know what it's like to not have food available, and

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Speaker 3: she gets frustrated because she's like, we're wasting so much.

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Speaker 3: But he just it's this childhood anxiety, like, no, I

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Speaker 3: never want to I never want our kids to ever

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Speaker 3: have to feel that ever. And so it's you know,

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Speaker 3: kind of like that where it's people that grew up

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Speaker 3: maybe without money or hard times, it's they'll maybe overcompensate,

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Speaker 3: where it's like I never want my kids to ever

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Speaker 3: come close to feeling that, Or it's the other end

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Speaker 3: where it's just like, no, I worked for this, you

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Speaker 3: gotta do the same thing. So it's fine in that

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Speaker 3: happy medium of still teaching then the lesson, but also

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Speaker 3: knowing that mom and dad got your back, you know.

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Speaker 2: I mean, I feel like we got off a little bit,

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Speaker 2: but like in a great way because the end of

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Speaker 2: the day, you know, if the kids don't want to

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Speaker 2: go to college, they do want to go to college.

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Speaker 3: Almost support them no matter what. I just here's the thing.

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Speaker 2: And what if Jolie wants to propose to somebody, what

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Speaker 2: would you say? And what if Jolie wants to have

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Speaker 2: a baby before she gets married.

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Speaker 3: Look, that's down the road. I don't want to have

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Speaker 3: to worry about that problem yet.

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Speaker 2: Okay, but because I think the dream world as everyone

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Speaker 2: you know, but some things just happen differently for people.

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Speaker 3: And it's okay, right, here's my only thing about Okay,

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Speaker 3: say you know they want to become an actor, right,

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Speaker 3: whe of the kids want to go out there, Jolie

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Speaker 3: wants to become an actor.

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Speaker 2: I mean I will, I will gladly tell them they

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Speaker 2: should not do that.

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Speaker 3: Right. But say say she wants to write, Okay, fine,

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Speaker 3: you know how hard it is to be successful at

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Speaker 3: it and to make any kind of living at it, right,

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Speaker 3: And so okay, say she does that, Say unfortunately it

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Speaker 3: doesn't pan out, and she didn't go to college or

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Speaker 3: any kind of school. Then she comes home and she's

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Speaker 3: twenty five. What career path does she have? Where it's

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Speaker 3: like it's like, what you think she's just going to

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Speaker 3: go get a job somewhere. Well, guess what. Nowadays to

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Speaker 3: get a job, it's like everyone you like have to

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Speaker 3: have a master's Before, Like when I got out of college,

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Speaker 3: it's like, yeah, you know, bachelor's degree is fine. Nowadays

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Speaker 3: it's like masters dot Like it's insanely competitive. So what

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Speaker 3: is she going to do?

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Speaker 2: Then well, I didn't go to college because I didn't

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Speaker 2: want to fall back plan because in my brain, I'm

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Speaker 2: like that way, I wouldn't fall back.

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Speaker 3: No, I'm with you, trust me. I was the same

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Speaker 3: way when I did the NFL. It's like it was

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Speaker 3: NFL or nothing. People are like, oh, what are you

355
00:17:20,480 --> 00:17:22,119
Speaker 3: gonna do after you know football? I was like, I'm

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Speaker 3: not worried about that because this is my plan A

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Speaker 3: through Z. So I get it. And with sports you're

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Speaker 3: able to go through the route of going to college

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Speaker 3: because that's part of the process.

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Speaker 2: I will say though, that even if you don't have

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Speaker 2: a backup plan, and you know, if you didn't have radio,

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Speaker 2: you might have found that you're always going to find

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Speaker 2: something else, whether some you're going to find something that

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Speaker 2: you will end up finding your passion. And I do

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Speaker 2: believe that if you set you up, set out your goal,

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Speaker 2: I think you'll always land. You're gonna land among the stars.

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Speaker 3: Or you'll land up at the bottom of a bottle.

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Speaker 2: O what Jesus.

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Speaker 3: Okay, there's other people that go that route.

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Speaker 2: I will say too, I'm not an advocate for not

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Speaker 2: going to college. I just want to say that I

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Speaker 2: think you know, having an education and a degree is

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Speaker 2: very valuable. But if you do have a you know,

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Speaker 2: acting or you want to open a pl you know.

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Speaker 2: I obviously if you want to go into business, it's

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Speaker 2: great too, you know, for a studio. But I just

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Speaker 2: think there are certain situations where maybe it isn't like

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Speaker 2: the route and that's what.

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Speaker 3: And that's fine.

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Speaker 2: Yeah.

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Speaker 3: I believe that college isn't for everybody. I do believe that.

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Speaker 3: But you know, again, I just want to plan, that's all.

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Speaker 2: I'm excited to just find out the proposal thing.

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Speaker 3: Well yeah, so on that topic, speaking of money and everything,

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Speaker 3: let's uh, let's take a quick break and then I'll

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Speaker 3: intro our guests. Sure, all right, So we have a

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Speaker 3: great guest today. You know, it's it's wildfire right now

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Speaker 3: Bling Empire on Netflix, and so we have the wonderful,

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Speaker 3: amazing sweet Cherie on the show today to talk everything

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Speaker 3: Bling Empire, her baby, her mother or her baby. Sorry,

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Speaker 3: her fiance Jesse was not able to join us, but

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Speaker 3: let's bring her in.

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Speaker 2: Hi, Hello, adorable, thank you.

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Speaker 3: You know, I just binged Bling Empire this morning actually,

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Speaker 3: and you know, I thought I was just going to

396
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Speaker 3: watch a little bit Schari just to watch you and

397
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Speaker 3: Jesse since we were supposed to have you and him on.

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Speaker 3: I know he couldn't make it today, but I really

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Speaker 3: enjoyed the show. It's very entertaining.

400
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Speaker 2: Yeah, and I have a lot of friends too that

401
00:19:41,440 --> 00:19:44,720
Speaker 2: are so you know, just like they that's all they

402
00:19:44,720 --> 00:19:47,720
Speaker 2: talk about what was for you? Like what was the

403
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Speaker 2: deciding factor for you to be on a reality show?

404
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Speaker 4: At first, I actually wasn't going to be a part

405
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Speaker 4: of it because I was so busy with my mom

406
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Speaker 4: and I was pregnant. And I told Jesse and he

407
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Speaker 4: was like, no, I'm not going to do it, and

408
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Speaker 4: he didn't even know who Jeff Drinkins was. I didn't

409
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Speaker 4: know who Jeff Drinkings was, but I knew his work.

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00:20:09,080 --> 00:20:10,520
Speaker 4: And then my friend told me, and then I went

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Speaker 4: to meet with Jeff and I thought it was too

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Speaker 4: good to be true. And I came home. I told

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Speaker 4: Jesse and he's like, no, that's that's too good to

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Speaker 4: be true, like an all Asian cast reality show. And

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Speaker 4: we just didn't think anything of it, and then you know,

416
00:20:24,800 --> 00:20:25,800
Speaker 4: he must down the road.

417
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Speaker 5: Jeff was like, hey, good news. You know we're gonna

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Speaker 5: do the show.

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Speaker 4: And all of my friends were like, oh, my gosh, Urea,

420
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Speaker 4: like they're all like happy, but I was like really depressed.

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Speaker 4: I was, you know, taking care of my mom and

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Speaker 4: being pregnant and really just trying to breathe because every

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Speaker 4: every day I went to the hospital was bad. And

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Speaker 4: I didn't think I was going to do the show

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Speaker 4: at all, really, and I spoke to my mom about

426
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Speaker 4: it and she was just she was at first, she was,

427
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Speaker 4: you know, against it, and she was just you know,

428
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Speaker 4: a very typical Chinese mom. But then later on she's like,

429
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Speaker 4: you know what, sure, you want to do the show,

430
00:21:02,160 --> 00:21:05,600
Speaker 4: you should do it. And then it's crazy because literally

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Speaker 4: a few weeks before the show started filming, she passed away,

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Speaker 4: and that gave me my Actually, the show really helped me,

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Speaker 4: helped me with a lot of grief. I think without

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Speaker 4: me being pregnant, and maybe even without the show, I

435
00:21:21,240 --> 00:21:23,720
Speaker 4: would just probably end up where my mom's at. Really,

436
00:21:23,800 --> 00:21:27,959
Speaker 4: like I couldn't. I couldn't think anything other than you know,

437
00:21:28,240 --> 00:21:31,439
Speaker 4: my mom not in my life, like but to me

438
00:21:31,480 --> 00:21:33,480
Speaker 4: that this doesn't make sense, Like even till this day,

439
00:21:33,560 --> 00:21:37,359
Speaker 4: I have trouble, especially during the holidays like today's Chinese

440
00:21:37,440 --> 00:21:41,600
Speaker 4: me Eve, and it's a big holiday in our family

441
00:21:41,720 --> 00:21:43,359
Speaker 4: and just you know, when I woke up in the

442
00:21:43,359 --> 00:21:45,359
Speaker 4: morning and she wasn't here, it just kind of shocked

443
00:21:45,400 --> 00:21:47,560
Speaker 4: me a little bit, and you know, the holidays are

444
00:21:47,560 --> 00:21:48,359
Speaker 4: really difficult for me.

445
00:21:48,640 --> 00:21:49,479
Speaker 2: I'm so sorry.

446
00:21:49,840 --> 00:21:51,560
Speaker 3: Yeah, I'm sure. I was just going to ask you,

447
00:21:51,560 --> 00:21:53,840
Speaker 3: did you know and you kind of answered it. It

448
00:21:53,880 --> 00:21:58,000
Speaker 3: seemed like the show was almost a healthy distraction for you,

449
00:21:58,560 --> 00:22:00,000
Speaker 3: and the fact that you got kind of your mother

450
00:22:00,119 --> 00:22:01,800
Speaker 3: is blessing there at the end, you know, before she

451
00:22:01,840 --> 00:22:03,919
Speaker 3: passed away. I think you're eight and a half months.

452
00:22:03,960 --> 00:22:10,360
Speaker 3: It was just before Javon was was born, correct, Yeah,

453
00:22:10,400 --> 00:22:15,920
Speaker 3: that's that's unfortunately, very very pregnant. Yeah, before he was born. Sorry,

454
00:22:15,960 --> 00:22:16,560
Speaker 3: if there's any.

455
00:22:19,400 --> 00:22:22,720
Speaker 2: M hmm. Yeah. You know, I'm curious when you say,

456
00:22:22,960 --> 00:22:28,320
Speaker 2: you know, like a typical Asian mom and the Asian culture,

457
00:22:28,880 --> 00:22:32,280
Speaker 2: what is I guess what is that? Because I don't

458
00:22:32,280 --> 00:22:35,959
Speaker 2: obviously I don't know much about the Asian culture and

459
00:22:36,000 --> 00:22:38,679
Speaker 2: how are you going to raise your kids? Like, what

460
00:22:38,760 --> 00:22:41,760
Speaker 2: are some of the the amazing attributes of the Asian

461
00:22:41,800 --> 00:22:44,360
Speaker 2: culture that you're going to bring in as a mother yourself?

462
00:22:44,920 --> 00:22:45,760
Speaker 5: I think you don't.

463
00:22:45,840 --> 00:22:48,399
Speaker 4: Yvonne definitely know a lot about Chinese food and just

464
00:22:48,480 --> 00:22:50,440
Speaker 4: Asian food in general, because we eat a lot of

465
00:22:50,480 --> 00:22:54,240
Speaker 4: it at home and out before COVID happened, and Judo

466
00:22:54,400 --> 00:22:57,040
Speaker 4: was very lucky. She actually got to travel everywhere. You know,

467
00:22:57,080 --> 00:23:00,119
Speaker 4: one baby, you can travel with them. Was easier now

468
00:23:00,160 --> 00:23:03,320
Speaker 4: with two babies and COVID, like, forget it, we're not traveling.

469
00:23:03,400 --> 00:23:06,160
Speaker 4: We're eating at home or we're buying to go right.

470
00:23:06,680 --> 00:23:09,840
Speaker 4: And so I think your Door has a lot of

471
00:23:09,920 --> 00:23:12,840
Speaker 4: Chinese values in her, more than I expect that she would.

472
00:23:13,400 --> 00:23:17,080
Speaker 4: I mean, she loves everything about the Chinese language and

473
00:23:17,160 --> 00:23:17,760
Speaker 4: learning it.

474
00:23:17,720 --> 00:23:22,320
Speaker 5: And actually every language. She's like a language girl, and she.

475
00:23:24,240 --> 00:23:26,199
Speaker 4: I don't know. I just hope I can be the

476
00:23:26,240 --> 00:23:29,959
Speaker 4: type of mom my mom was to me to Judor,

477
00:23:30,440 --> 00:23:35,360
Speaker 4: because it's just been so hectic without her, and I

478
00:23:35,400 --> 00:23:39,639
Speaker 4: feel that, you know, when she was here, I was

479
00:23:39,680 --> 00:23:42,400
Speaker 4: just like kind of being lazy, I guess, lazy mom,

480
00:23:42,440 --> 00:23:43,360
Speaker 4: but my first baby.

481
00:23:43,520 --> 00:23:44,840
Speaker 5: I was definitely there for Judor.

482
00:23:44,960 --> 00:23:47,520
Speaker 4: But I leaned a lot my mom because you know, Mom,

483
00:23:47,600 --> 00:23:50,639
Speaker 4: she came in, she did everything for me and was

484
00:23:50,680 --> 00:23:53,840
Speaker 4: really close to her. And I don't think your Door

485
00:23:53,960 --> 00:23:55,920
Speaker 4: knows my mom is gone, Like she knows that she's

486
00:23:55,960 --> 00:23:58,359
Speaker 4: not here, but she doesn't know where she's at like,

487
00:23:58,400 --> 00:24:01,720
Speaker 4: she'll ask me even today, she's oh, Popost coming in

488
00:24:01,760 --> 00:24:05,600
Speaker 4: and goole, is you know grandma Grandpa? And I told

489
00:24:05,600 --> 00:24:07,920
Speaker 4: her no, they're going to come tomorrow and she's like, okay.

490
00:24:08,000 --> 00:24:10,359
Speaker 4: But even if she doesn't see my mom, she's still like,

491
00:24:10,440 --> 00:24:12,960
Speaker 4: for some reason, feels that my mom is here.

492
00:24:13,400 --> 00:24:14,359
Speaker 5: Doesn't make any sense.

493
00:24:14,520 --> 00:24:15,920
Speaker 3: No, it definitely does.

494
00:24:16,040 --> 00:24:16,719
Speaker 5: She could feel it.

495
00:24:17,119 --> 00:24:19,200
Speaker 3: Yeah, that that definitely makes sense. How old are the

496
00:24:19,280 --> 00:24:19,800
Speaker 3: kids now?

497
00:24:20,480 --> 00:24:23,520
Speaker 5: Judor is four and a half and Japan is eighteen months?

498
00:24:24,359 --> 00:24:28,399
Speaker 3: Wow, that's that's crazy, because I guess you guys were

499
00:24:28,400 --> 00:24:30,719
Speaker 3: filming obviously a while back, because I mean, you know,

500
00:24:30,840 --> 00:24:32,880
Speaker 3: she had the birth of her of your son on

501
00:24:32,920 --> 00:24:35,439
Speaker 3: the show, which was a pretty cool experience. Was that

502
00:24:35,560 --> 00:24:38,520
Speaker 3: something that you were open to doing or did it

503
00:24:38,640 --> 00:24:41,399
Speaker 3: you know, did it just kind of it seemed to

504
00:24:41,440 --> 00:24:43,639
Speaker 3: happen that way or did you have any issue with that?

505
00:24:45,440 --> 00:24:45,640
Speaker 1: No?

506
00:24:45,760 --> 00:24:48,000
Speaker 4: I actually no, I didn't want to film my birth

507
00:24:48,040 --> 00:24:53,720
Speaker 4: on TV, not on Netflix. But then I thought about

508
00:24:53,720 --> 00:24:57,520
Speaker 4: it hard with Jesse and we're I and I told him, hey,

509
00:24:57,600 --> 00:24:59,480
Speaker 4: you know what I don't have any footage of because

510
00:24:59,520 --> 00:25:01,560
Speaker 4: when was born, he was really nervous.

511
00:25:01,560 --> 00:25:01,760
Speaker 5: He did.

512
00:25:01,960 --> 00:25:04,000
Speaker 4: I told him, like let's hire a photographer, let's have

513
00:25:04,040 --> 00:25:06,120
Speaker 4: a videographer. He's like, no, we're not doing any that.

514
00:25:06,359 --> 00:25:10,159
Speaker 4: I'm gonna do my iPhone. So he took an iPhone video,

515
00:25:10,359 --> 00:25:12,800
Speaker 4: but the whole video is in slow motion. So I

516
00:25:12,840 --> 00:25:14,680
Speaker 4: reminded him myself, are you sure you want you want

517
00:25:14,680 --> 00:25:16,600
Speaker 4: to have a slow motion like video of Javon?

518
00:25:17,119 --> 00:25:18,439
Speaker 5: Like, I don't want that.

519
00:25:18,680 --> 00:25:22,200
Speaker 4: And so we we you know, obviously talked to the producers.

520
00:25:22,200 --> 00:25:23,919
Speaker 4: We're like, okay, well make sure you know it's not

521
00:25:25,359 --> 00:25:28,200
Speaker 4: like PG thirteen. It has been PG like really clean,

522
00:25:28,760 --> 00:25:31,800
Speaker 4: like nothing, you know, grided r. And they're like, oh,

523
00:25:31,840 --> 00:25:33,760
Speaker 4: of course, not sure. Why would we do that to you,

524
00:25:34,080 --> 00:25:37,000
Speaker 4: Like it would totally be PG. And then to the

525
00:25:37,000 --> 00:25:39,280
Speaker 4: clip and then showed me and they're like, oh do

526
00:25:39,359 --> 00:25:42,360
Speaker 4: you approve? And I'm like, yeah, it's beautiful. I mean

527
00:25:42,400 --> 00:25:45,440
Speaker 4: the fact that I saw Javon's first breath on TV

528
00:25:46,240 --> 00:25:47,080
Speaker 4: like that just takes my.

529
00:25:47,080 --> 00:25:49,119
Speaker 5: Breath away every time I watch it.

530
00:25:49,720 --> 00:25:52,439
Speaker 4: Well, next cry and actually all of my family members,

531
00:25:52,440 --> 00:25:53,520
Speaker 4: all my friends cried too.

532
00:25:53,760 --> 00:25:57,320
Speaker 2: Well if you ever want to feel uh, we had

533
00:25:57,600 --> 00:26:02,960
Speaker 2: our son actually live podcast and I regret that just

534
00:26:03,000 --> 00:26:06,280
Speaker 2: because I mean, I'm like huking it I'm like throwing up.

535
00:26:06,320 --> 00:26:08,399
Speaker 2: I'm having a panic attack because when I was getting

536
00:26:08,400 --> 00:26:10,879
Speaker 2: like the epidural like there was the spinal tap or whatever.

537
00:26:10,960 --> 00:26:14,040
Speaker 2: I mean, it was just like ridiculous. So major props

538
00:26:14,080 --> 00:26:17,639
Speaker 2: to you for showing, you know, actually showing it.

539
00:26:17,880 --> 00:26:18,840
Speaker 5: You only have one baby.

540
00:26:19,320 --> 00:26:21,440
Speaker 2: We have two. We have a five year old girl

541
00:26:21,720 --> 00:26:26,560
Speaker 2: and a two year old little boy. So yeah, they're

542
00:26:26,840 --> 00:26:31,000
Speaker 2: they're fun, They're they're awesome kids. But I'm I'm curious

543
00:26:31,080 --> 00:26:34,159
Speaker 2: because you know, I've you know, I haven't watched the

544
00:26:34,160 --> 00:26:35,960
Speaker 2: show yet. I'm going to now because I love you

545
00:26:36,040 --> 00:26:38,879
Speaker 2: and you're so cute, and you know, Michael was saying

546
00:26:38,880 --> 00:26:41,359
Speaker 2: how much he really enjoyed it too. But what he

547
00:26:41,440 --> 00:26:44,520
Speaker 2: told me was that you proposed, And I was just like, wait, what,

548
00:26:44,920 --> 00:26:49,480
Speaker 2: Like she proposed to him? And I'm curious, like how that,

549
00:26:49,640 --> 00:26:52,760
Speaker 2: like a what was your deciding factor? And then was

550
00:26:52,760 --> 00:26:56,800
Speaker 2: there anything in you being like because if that was me,

551
00:26:56,840 --> 00:26:58,359
Speaker 2: I'd be like, well, why wouldn't you propose to me?

552
00:26:58,440 --> 00:27:01,199
Speaker 2: Like don't you like am I not good enough? Am

553
00:27:01,240 --> 00:27:02,040
Speaker 2: I not worth it?

554
00:27:02,080 --> 00:27:02,199
Speaker 3: Like?

555
00:27:02,200 --> 00:27:04,040
Speaker 2: What did any of those thoughts go through your head

556
00:27:04,040 --> 00:27:04,320
Speaker 2: at all?

557
00:27:05,320 --> 00:27:05,560
Speaker 3: No?

558
00:27:05,680 --> 00:27:07,879
Speaker 4: I never felt that way with Jesse. I never felt

559
00:27:07,920 --> 00:27:10,040
Speaker 4: I wasn't good enough or not worth it, because he

560
00:27:10,200 --> 00:27:16,920
Speaker 4: always he's always there for me, he like physically, emotionally everything,

561
00:27:17,000 --> 00:27:18,960
Speaker 4: Like even with my mom which is in the hospital,

562
00:27:19,000 --> 00:27:20,000
Speaker 4: he came with me all the time.

563
00:27:20,000 --> 00:27:20,520
Speaker 5: He drove me.

564
00:27:20,560 --> 00:27:23,639
Speaker 4: He didn't want me to drive, and I never felt

565
00:27:23,720 --> 00:27:25,960
Speaker 4: that he didn't want me. It was never about that.

566
00:27:26,080 --> 00:27:28,679
Speaker 4: And I think with Jesse, he just like kind of

567
00:27:28,720 --> 00:27:33,120
Speaker 4: like a snail. He takes his time and to his

568
00:27:35,080 --> 00:27:37,439
Speaker 4: I mean to back him up a little bit, he

569
00:27:37,520 --> 00:27:41,680
Speaker 4: was actually going to propose, uh, right before we found

570
00:27:41,680 --> 00:27:45,240
Speaker 4: that my mom, you know, is ill, was ill, and uh,

571
00:27:45,320 --> 00:27:47,840
Speaker 4: he had planned on it. He put like a big

572
00:27:47,880 --> 00:27:51,520
Speaker 4: trip to Japan and I don't think I was pregnant yet.

573
00:27:51,600 --> 00:27:52,240
Speaker 5: Yeah I wasn't.

574
00:27:52,359 --> 00:27:54,240
Speaker 4: I wasn't pregnant yet, and he planned a big trip

575
00:27:54,240 --> 00:27:57,640
Speaker 4: to stripand he me there with my mom there. But

576
00:27:57,680 --> 00:28:01,000
Speaker 4: then you know, we heard the bad news and he

577
00:28:01,119 --> 00:28:02,280
Speaker 4: obviously didn't.

578
00:28:02,040 --> 00:28:05,240
Speaker 5: Want me to He knew how sad it was.

579
00:28:05,440 --> 00:28:08,199
Speaker 4: My mom was everything to me, and so he just

580
00:28:08,240 --> 00:28:10,440
Speaker 4: you know, stopped the whole plan. He canceled the trip,

581
00:28:10,600 --> 00:28:14,159
Speaker 4: and he thought maybe he was going to post me

582
00:28:14,240 --> 00:28:16,000
Speaker 4: like in between that he was hoping my mom will

583
00:28:16,040 --> 00:28:18,760
Speaker 4: get better, like we're all hoping that, but she just

584
00:28:19,160 --> 00:28:21,640
Speaker 4: every day it was like a downfall for her. And

585
00:28:23,119 --> 00:28:25,840
Speaker 4: so with that being said, then he was gonna propose

586
00:28:25,920 --> 00:28:28,640
Speaker 4: like after but then there's this like Chinese like functory

587
00:28:28,840 --> 00:28:31,320
Speaker 4: thing where you're not supposed to do it. I don't

588
00:28:31,320 --> 00:28:33,560
Speaker 4: I don't really know what the story is. But yeah,

589
00:28:33,600 --> 00:28:35,760
Speaker 4: it's just like he told me. And then I was,

590
00:28:36,560 --> 00:28:39,960
Speaker 4: g that's so slow. I'm just gonna do it like whatever.

591
00:28:40,240 --> 00:28:42,560
Speaker 4: I don't care, you know, and not I don't care,

592
00:28:42,600 --> 00:28:47,440
Speaker 4: I do care, but yeah, I just w my that feeling,

593
00:28:47,560 --> 00:28:50,520
Speaker 4: and at that moment, I felt my mom. She's still

594
00:28:50,560 --> 00:28:53,240
Speaker 4: here in spirit and she would have loved to know that,

595
00:28:53,640 --> 00:28:54,800
Speaker 4: you know, we were engaged.

596
00:28:55,160 --> 00:28:57,880
Speaker 3: That's so great. I was anxious to ask both of you.

597
00:28:57,880 --> 00:29:00,560
Speaker 3: You know, when your kids get older and they get

598
00:29:00,600 --> 00:29:03,840
Speaker 3: to that point of relationship, you know, is that something

599
00:29:03,880 --> 00:29:06,080
Speaker 3: with Jesse? You know, because like what he was saying

600
00:29:06,120 --> 00:29:07,800
Speaker 3: on the show, he was like, why does everything have

601
00:29:07,880 --> 00:29:10,760
Speaker 3: to be so traditional? Like, you know, we have this family,

602
00:29:10,840 --> 00:29:13,000
Speaker 3: we love each other, like yeah, we'll get married. But

603
00:29:13,680 --> 00:29:15,440
Speaker 3: he didn't want to feel rushed or whatever it was.

604
00:29:15,480 --> 00:29:17,320
Speaker 3: I know there's a lot around it, Like you're just saying,

605
00:29:17,360 --> 00:29:20,360
Speaker 3: but when it comes to your kids. Is that something

606
00:29:20,360 --> 00:29:22,240
Speaker 3: that you guys are going to kind of teach or

607
00:29:22,280 --> 00:29:25,360
Speaker 3: preach to be, like, hey, be married before you have kids,

608
00:29:25,520 --> 00:29:27,360
Speaker 3: or are you going to be more open because y'all

609
00:29:27,400 --> 00:29:28,400
Speaker 3: story is a little different.

610
00:29:28,920 --> 00:29:31,040
Speaker 5: I think my life was meant to be this way.

611
00:29:31,080 --> 00:29:33,280
Speaker 4: But definitely for my children, I want them to get

612
00:29:33,400 --> 00:29:35,920
Speaker 4: married first and then have babies.

613
00:29:36,200 --> 00:29:37,400
Speaker 5: Yeah, and I.

614
00:29:37,360 --> 00:29:41,200
Speaker 4: Want to be there for the wedding really important to me.

615
00:29:42,200 --> 00:29:46,320
Speaker 2: So what was that for you that you know where

616
00:29:46,360 --> 00:29:48,440
Speaker 2: you didn't feel like you had to do it the

617
00:29:48,920 --> 00:29:49,760
Speaker 2: traditional way.

618
00:29:51,040 --> 00:29:53,280
Speaker 4: I think maybe that lucky. I don't know, DoD o

619
00:29:53,320 --> 00:29:58,200
Speaker 4: get lucky or unlucky. I have no idea. I never

620
00:29:58,280 --> 00:30:01,800
Speaker 4: in my life thought I would post to someone, I guess,

621
00:30:02,160 --> 00:30:04,680
Speaker 4: and the ideas kind of came to me out of

622
00:30:04,680 --> 00:30:08,960
Speaker 4: the blues. And I remember telling my friend and she's like, wait,

623
00:30:09,120 --> 00:30:11,960
Speaker 4: are you okay? Like did you drink religion tequila? I? No,

624
00:30:12,080 --> 00:30:16,520
Speaker 4: I didn't drink religion tequila? And yeah, she's yeah. She

625
00:30:16,560 --> 00:30:17,400
Speaker 4: thought was crazy.

626
00:30:17,760 --> 00:30:20,720
Speaker 3: Well, I mean, good for you because you know it

627
00:30:21,640 --> 00:30:25,040
Speaker 3: came across in such a positive way where it wasn't

628
00:30:25,120 --> 00:30:27,960
Speaker 3: like you were demanding it or just making the move.

629
00:30:27,960 --> 00:30:29,560
Speaker 3: When he didn't want to. You're like, hey, this is

630
00:30:29,560 --> 00:30:32,080
Speaker 3: what I want. I'm a I'm a strong, you know,

631
00:30:32,360 --> 00:30:34,880
Speaker 3: woman that wants to marry this man. He wants to

632
00:30:34,880 --> 00:30:36,560
Speaker 3: marry me. I know that. So I'm just gonna step

633
00:30:36,640 --> 00:30:38,440
Speaker 3: up and do it. So I love the way I

634
00:30:38,440 --> 00:30:40,000
Speaker 3: thought they framed it in such a good way, And

635
00:30:40,000 --> 00:30:41,680
Speaker 3: I thought you delivered it in such a good way

636
00:30:41,680 --> 00:30:44,480
Speaker 3: that it wasn't out of a again, a distress. It

637
00:30:44,520 --> 00:30:46,120
Speaker 3: was out of just because of you guys loved and

638
00:30:46,160 --> 00:30:48,360
Speaker 3: connected with each other. So I thought it was really beautiful.

639
00:30:48,640 --> 00:30:51,080
Speaker 2: Yeah, and I'm curious, And first of all, I'm so

640
00:30:51,120 --> 00:30:54,920
Speaker 2: sorry about your mom, you know, for our listeners, are

641
00:30:54,920 --> 00:30:59,480
Speaker 2: there any tips for you that you do like to

642
00:30:59,560 --> 00:31:02,320
Speaker 2: deal with grief or someone that's lost a loved one,

643
00:31:03,160 --> 00:31:06,320
Speaker 2: Like what what helps you? Do you meditate? Do you

644
00:31:06,360 --> 00:31:09,080
Speaker 2: write things down? Do you distract yourself? Like what are

645
00:31:09,120 --> 00:31:12,400
Speaker 2: some of the ways that you've been able to to

646
00:31:12,720 --> 00:31:14,200
Speaker 2: kind of put one foot in front of the other.

647
00:31:14,680 --> 00:31:18,520
Speaker 4: Dealing with the grief was not easy when I was

648
00:31:18,520 --> 00:31:20,920
Speaker 4: still pregnant. Every day I had to tell myself like,

649
00:31:21,040 --> 00:31:24,160
Speaker 4: don't cry, don't cry, don't cry, don't affect baby jabbon.

650
00:31:25,160 --> 00:31:28,880
Speaker 4: And up until the day he finally came out. I

651
00:31:28,960 --> 00:31:32,080
Speaker 4: thought I was gonna go home and drink and just drink,

652
00:31:32,120 --> 00:31:33,200
Speaker 4: but I don't even drink much.

653
00:31:33,800 --> 00:31:35,239
Speaker 5: But I never did any of that.

654
00:31:35,320 --> 00:31:37,400
Speaker 4: I thought I was just gonna drink and be sad

655
00:31:37,440 --> 00:31:39,680
Speaker 4: and cried out, but I actually never did any of that.

656
00:31:40,720 --> 00:31:42,840
Speaker 4: Do I cry, yes, especially during your holidays.

657
00:31:42,840 --> 00:31:44,680
Speaker 5: I cry a lot. Even today I cried.

658
00:31:45,240 --> 00:31:45,720
Speaker 1: And.

659
00:31:47,160 --> 00:31:51,040
Speaker 5: I think just I don't think too much of it.

660
00:31:51,360 --> 00:31:53,600
Speaker 4: You know, know that you're whoever that passed away in

661
00:31:53,600 --> 00:31:55,360
Speaker 4: your life is in a better place, and that they're

662
00:31:56,000 --> 00:31:58,400
Speaker 4: they're still here with you, Like I know my mom

663
00:31:58,480 --> 00:32:00,840
Speaker 4: is like in heaven, but I feel that she's around,

664
00:32:01,560 --> 00:32:02,680
Speaker 4: and I don't know.

665
00:32:02,560 --> 00:32:04,880
Speaker 5: How to explain it. I don't know how. I think

666
00:32:04,920 --> 00:32:07,840
Speaker 5: everyone deals with a grief differently, but definitely don't drink

667
00:32:07,880 --> 00:32:10,640
Speaker 5: when you're grieving. And and don't.

668
00:32:10,320 --> 00:32:14,880
Speaker 4: You know, I think I was very lucky to have Japan.

669
00:32:15,040 --> 00:32:18,520
Speaker 4: He helped me a lot, like he is the happiest baby.

670
00:32:18,560 --> 00:32:19,480
Speaker 5: I don't know how that.

671
00:32:19,400 --> 00:32:23,640
Speaker 4: Baby went through like nine months of with me being sad,

672
00:32:24,200 --> 00:32:27,720
Speaker 4: going to the hospital, going on ambulance rides, like taking

673
00:32:27,760 --> 00:32:30,840
Speaker 4: care of my mom, be a caretaker, a bookkeeper, like

674
00:32:30,880 --> 00:32:33,200
Speaker 4: a like a want to be doctor, like a nurse,

675
00:32:33,440 --> 00:32:36,120
Speaker 4: like he did everything with me and he popped out

676
00:32:36,160 --> 00:32:38,360
Speaker 4: just like the happiest baby like he. I don't know.

677
00:32:38,400 --> 00:32:40,480
Speaker 5: He he was a gift for me, like a gift

678
00:32:40,480 --> 00:32:43,640
Speaker 5: from taught to me to help me with my mom.

679
00:32:43,680 --> 00:32:44,800
Speaker 5: Literally that's how I feel.

680
00:32:44,880 --> 00:32:50,200
Speaker 4: And he he just is always smiling around me. I

681
00:32:50,600 --> 00:32:52,960
Speaker 4: can't like if I'm sad, I just look at him.

682
00:32:53,360 --> 00:32:53,760
Speaker 5: I'm done.

683
00:32:53,880 --> 00:32:54,280
Speaker 1: I don't.

684
00:32:54,320 --> 00:32:57,320
Speaker 5: I don't know I feel sad anymore. He's a gift.

685
00:32:58,080 --> 00:33:01,720
Speaker 3: Yeah, I love it. You know you're you're just mentioning

686
00:33:01,840 --> 00:33:05,080
Speaker 3: drinking a little bit chery and you mentioned religious tequila

687
00:33:05,800 --> 00:33:08,040
Speaker 3: and uh, you know, I know that's something that you

688
00:33:08,120 --> 00:33:10,400
Speaker 3: and Jesse have worked on in a business that you started.

689
00:33:10,480 --> 00:33:12,720
Speaker 3: Tell us and our listeners kind of some about the

690
00:33:12,920 --> 00:33:15,920
Speaker 3: entrepreneurial endeavors that you and Jesse are doing.

691
00:33:16,520 --> 00:33:20,520
Speaker 4: Right. Religion tequila another one of our babies. We actually

692
00:33:20,560 --> 00:33:26,280
Speaker 4: started the from scratch and it's one hundred percent worgan

693
00:33:26,320 --> 00:33:28,880
Speaker 4: in tequila. We have a Manuka honey tequila which is

694
00:33:28,920 --> 00:33:33,080
Speaker 4: really delicious and that Nuka honey. I mean, people are

695
00:33:33,320 --> 00:33:37,680
Speaker 4: crazy about it because they think, you know, if you're

696
00:33:37,720 --> 00:33:39,560
Speaker 4: not feeling well and you take a shot of Manukahan

697
00:33:39,680 --> 00:33:45,520
Speaker 4: in tequila. You're good to go, and we never marketed anything,

698
00:33:47,320 --> 00:33:49,840
Speaker 4: but we're grateful for the company. Yeah, we work so

699
00:33:49,880 --> 00:33:53,240
Speaker 4: hard on it. The bottles are are triangular shape, they're

700
00:33:53,320 --> 00:33:55,960
Speaker 4: very beautiful. Actually, we're having a private label come out

701
00:33:55,960 --> 00:33:58,280
Speaker 4: at the end of the month, and what it is

702
00:33:58,280 --> 00:34:00,600
Speaker 4: is you can it's a special bottle for you and

703
00:34:00,640 --> 00:34:02,880
Speaker 4: you can put your name on it and there's.

704
00:34:02,720 --> 00:34:04,800
Speaker 5: Only one hundred bottles and.

705
00:34:06,440 --> 00:34:10,480
Speaker 4: It's like a special private label for whoever that wants

706
00:34:10,520 --> 00:34:11,000
Speaker 4: to win one.

707
00:34:11,120 --> 00:34:14,240
Speaker 2: Yeah, that's so awesome. And where can our listeners find

708
00:34:14,320 --> 00:34:16,839
Speaker 2: you and find this Religion Tequila?

709
00:34:18,200 --> 00:34:21,560
Speaker 4: For me, it would be Surey Official on Instagram, and

710
00:34:21,640 --> 00:34:26,759
Speaker 4: for Religion Tequila it would be Tequila Religion on Instagram.

711
00:34:26,800 --> 00:34:29,840
Speaker 2: Amazing. Well, thank you so much for coming on our show.

712
00:34:30,400 --> 00:34:31,920
Speaker 2: Sorry that there was a little bit of delay, but

713
00:34:31,960 --> 00:34:34,560
Speaker 2: thank you for coming on our show and just sharing

714
00:34:34,600 --> 00:34:37,239
Speaker 2: your story with us and being open with us and

715
00:34:37,320 --> 00:34:40,240
Speaker 2: authentic and vulnerable, especially with your mom. And I'm so sorry.

716
00:34:40,360 --> 00:34:44,879
Speaker 2: And I'm excited to watch Bling Empire because yeah, you're

717
00:34:44,920 --> 00:34:48,120
Speaker 2: just You're so sweet and I'm pumped to watch it.

718
00:34:48,200 --> 00:34:49,799
Speaker 2: So thanks for coming on our show.

719
00:34:49,880 --> 00:34:51,040
Speaker 3: Thanks for for your time.

720
00:34:51,360 --> 00:34:51,680
Speaker 5: Bye.

721
00:35:03,560 --> 00:35:04,560
Speaker 2: She was so sweet.

722
00:35:04,680 --> 00:35:06,600
Speaker 3: Oh she was great. You know, I wish we had Jesse,

723
00:35:06,719 --> 00:35:11,720
Speaker 3: her her fiance, onto but no, she was super sweet.

724
00:35:11,760 --> 00:35:13,560
Speaker 3: She came across just as she does in the show,

725
00:35:14,080 --> 00:35:15,000
Speaker 3: just very like kind.

726
00:35:15,200 --> 00:35:18,120
Speaker 2: You know. What's interesting is she doesn't seem like someone

727
00:35:18,160 --> 00:35:19,840
Speaker 2: that would be on a reality show, do you know

728
00:35:19,880 --> 00:35:23,759
Speaker 2: what I mean? Okay, because yeah, I was expecting because

729
00:35:23,880 --> 00:35:26,560
Speaker 2: you see the billboard, right, and that's all I've seen

730
00:35:26,640 --> 00:35:28,600
Speaker 2: pretty much, you know, because I haven't had a chance

731
00:35:28,600 --> 00:35:30,319
Speaker 2: to watch yet. You know, you said you would watch

732
00:35:30,360 --> 00:35:32,759
Speaker 2: it and kind of you know, fill me in on that,

733
00:35:32,880 --> 00:35:37,480
Speaker 2: and and it just was like, eh, like I loved

734
00:35:37,560 --> 00:35:40,799
Speaker 2: Crazy Rich Asians, like the movie, but I was just like,

735
00:35:40,880 --> 00:35:42,440
Speaker 2: I just don't know if I can deal with another

736
00:35:43,040 --> 00:35:47,000
Speaker 2: out there reality show, you know, like a Housewives. I

737
00:35:47,040 --> 00:35:48,759
Speaker 2: just like, I cause I don't I'm not a really

738
00:35:48,760 --> 00:35:51,520
Speaker 2: big Housewives fan. I mean I watch a few shows,

739
00:35:51,520 --> 00:35:52,960
Speaker 2: but you know what I mean, Like, I'm just like,

740
00:35:53,719 --> 00:35:56,239
Speaker 2: but she was just normal and like nice.

741
00:35:56,040 --> 00:35:59,239
Speaker 3: Nor and her and her fiance Jesse are definitely the

742
00:35:59,400 --> 00:36:03,600
Speaker 3: calmest out of the crew. But even so it's not

743
00:36:03,680 --> 00:36:07,080
Speaker 3: as it's not as dramatic as some of the Housewives

744
00:36:07,440 --> 00:36:09,680
Speaker 3: shows have been. Yeah, there's some drama, but it's like

745
00:36:10,080 --> 00:36:13,120
Speaker 3: everyone's still connected and still friends. But no, Cherie and

746
00:36:13,200 --> 00:36:17,480
Speaker 3: Jesse are so sweet, are such nice gentle people on

747
00:36:17,480 --> 00:36:22,120
Speaker 3: the show, and she I mean, that's exactly what I expected.

748
00:36:22,440 --> 00:36:24,200
Speaker 2: You know, And now I want to watch it because

749
00:36:24,200 --> 00:36:26,360
Speaker 2: that's because that's the kind of reality TV I like, like,

750
00:36:26,440 --> 00:36:28,080
Speaker 2: I like like if we were to ever do a

751
00:36:28,200 --> 00:36:30,280
Speaker 2: reality show, I would want to be with like friends

752
00:36:30,520 --> 00:36:33,480
Speaker 2: or where it's like happy and it's not just like

753
00:36:33,840 --> 00:36:36,480
Speaker 2: drama and throwing tables and like hitting each other. Do

754
00:36:36,520 --> 00:36:37,040
Speaker 2: you know what I mean?

755
00:36:37,160 --> 00:36:37,279
Speaker 4: Right?

756
00:36:37,320 --> 00:36:39,319
Speaker 3: Unless it's like a contest to see who can throw

757
00:36:39,320 --> 00:36:43,319
Speaker 3: a table further, then well I'm in.

758
00:36:45,120 --> 00:36:47,520
Speaker 2: Okay, Mark, Do we have any emails?

759
00:36:47,960 --> 00:36:48,319
Speaker 3: We do?

760
00:36:48,760 --> 00:36:49,760
Speaker 1: This is from Hannah.

761
00:36:49,800 --> 00:36:50,600
Speaker 3: She's frustrated.

762
00:36:50,640 --> 00:36:52,520
Speaker 1: She says, my boyfriend went on a hunting trip with

763
00:36:52,600 --> 00:36:55,560
Speaker 1: some friends after I asked him not to go. We

764
00:36:55,600 --> 00:36:58,279
Speaker 1: live together and I'm a full time photographer. Well, four

765
00:36:58,360 --> 00:37:01,640
Speaker 1: days later, he tests positive COVID. I now have to

766
00:37:01,680 --> 00:37:04,560
Speaker 1: postpone all of my photo sessions for two weeks and

767
00:37:04,600 --> 00:37:07,640
Speaker 1: I'm taking a huge income loss. I'm so hurt and

768
00:37:07,680 --> 00:37:09,799
Speaker 1: angry with him, and I'm feeling so much resentment, even

769
00:37:09,840 --> 00:37:12,759
Speaker 1: though he has apologized many times. Neither of us can

770
00:37:12,880 --> 00:37:14,640
Speaker 1: leave the house to get any space from each other.

771
00:37:14,920 --> 00:37:16,600
Speaker 1: How would you handle working through this?

772
00:37:18,320 --> 00:37:21,680
Speaker 3: And I feel bad, as she asked, and I feel

773
00:37:21,680 --> 00:37:25,680
Speaker 3: bad for him because of course he goes. He's never

774
00:37:25,760 --> 00:37:27,680
Speaker 3: living this though never.

775
00:37:28,440 --> 00:37:30,640
Speaker 2: Poor guy, poor guy.

776
00:37:30,880 --> 00:37:33,759
Speaker 3: And poor hair, poor both of them, because this is

777
00:37:33,800 --> 00:37:36,160
Speaker 3: just an unfortunate because think of all the people that

778
00:37:36,200 --> 00:37:39,480
Speaker 3: have done. I did my buddy's weekend in North Carolina

779
00:37:40,239 --> 00:37:44,880
Speaker 3: last year during COVID and you know, knowing there's fourteen

780
00:37:44,920 --> 00:37:48,080
Speaker 3: of us there, no one got anything. And you know

781
00:37:48,120 --> 00:37:50,239
Speaker 3: which now, granted was all of our fears that we

782
00:37:50,280 --> 00:37:52,040
Speaker 3: would come home because all of our wives would have

783
00:37:52,040 --> 00:37:54,960
Speaker 3: been like, I told you not to go, But that

784
00:37:55,000 --> 00:37:56,600
Speaker 3: didn't happen. So I feel bad for him.

785
00:37:57,239 --> 00:37:59,319
Speaker 2: I will say though too. You know that was a

786
00:37:59,600 --> 00:38:02,239
Speaker 2: conver station that we had because it was sure in

787
00:38:02,280 --> 00:38:05,720
Speaker 2: the COVID times. I also knew it was with June, July, August,

788
00:38:05,920 --> 00:38:10,960
Speaker 2: September was that it was it was and July, so

789
00:38:11,000 --> 00:38:14,080
Speaker 2: I mean it was definitely during you know, still COVID times,

790
00:38:14,120 --> 00:38:15,880
Speaker 2: and I mean obviously it's all COVID times right now,

791
00:38:15,920 --> 00:38:19,160
Speaker 2: but you know it's still where it was. You should

792
00:38:19,200 --> 00:38:23,600
Speaker 2: really probably stay home, and but I knew he needed it,

793
00:38:24,000 --> 00:38:26,560
Speaker 2: and I knew that it would be good for him,

794
00:38:26,800 --> 00:38:29,600
Speaker 2: but I did say it. We did have a conversation

795
00:38:30,360 --> 00:38:34,440
Speaker 2: that if either I changed my mind like unsafe for whatever,

796
00:38:35,239 --> 00:38:37,960
Speaker 2: is it okay? Like would you can you stay home

797
00:38:38,160 --> 00:38:41,040
Speaker 2: if for some reason I just don't feel comfortable with it?

798
00:38:41,080 --> 00:38:43,640
Speaker 2: And he was like, one thousand percent if you want

799
00:38:43,680 --> 00:38:45,600
Speaker 2: me to stay home, no issues at all, And I

800
00:38:45,640 --> 00:38:48,520
Speaker 2: feel like that's that. And once he said that, I

801
00:38:48,560 --> 00:38:50,759
Speaker 2: was like, no, babe, go like go, go, go, like

802
00:38:50,840 --> 00:38:54,520
Speaker 2: you need it. Go. I think he probably would have

803
00:38:54,640 --> 00:38:57,600
Speaker 2: She probably would have been just as open to it

804
00:38:58,120 --> 00:39:01,240
Speaker 2: if if he was just as like, if you don't.

805
00:39:01,080 --> 00:39:03,640
Speaker 3: Want me to go, well, well she said no.

806
00:39:04,400 --> 00:39:06,880
Speaker 2: Yeah. But how did she say no though, because she

807
00:39:06,920 --> 00:39:09,319
Speaker 2: might have been like you're not going like a controlling way.

808
00:39:09,840 --> 00:39:12,200
Speaker 3: H Yeah. I don't know. I don't know. I make

809
00:39:12,280 --> 00:39:15,759
Speaker 3: up that she might have. She might have. She might've

810
00:39:15,800 --> 00:39:17,839
Speaker 3: been like, no, you're not going, and then that's why

811
00:39:17,880 --> 00:39:20,160
Speaker 3: he was probably likes, screw it, I'm going.

812
00:39:21,040 --> 00:39:22,879
Speaker 2: And if she would have maybe expressed it in any

813
00:39:22,880 --> 00:39:23,719
Speaker 2: more be like.

814
00:39:23,680 --> 00:39:26,239
Speaker 3: Look, I know you want to go, it's just right

815
00:39:26,239 --> 00:39:27,880
Speaker 3: now is not a good time. Because of COVID, I

816
00:39:27,880 --> 00:39:29,880
Speaker 3: got all these shoots coming up. How much would that

817
00:39:29,920 --> 00:39:32,440
Speaker 3: suck if you the off chance you came back with

818
00:39:32,480 --> 00:39:35,360
Speaker 3: it right? So can we just wait it out a

819
00:39:35,400 --> 00:39:37,640
Speaker 3: little longer and then I promise you and your buddies

820
00:39:37,640 --> 00:39:40,239
Speaker 3: can go, you know, as soon as you can after that.

821
00:39:41,560 --> 00:39:44,960
Speaker 3: So yeah, I mean, all sounds good in hindsight, and

822
00:39:45,040 --> 00:39:46,880
Speaker 3: it sound and it's a lot harder to do in

823
00:39:46,880 --> 00:39:47,920
Speaker 3: the moment we get it.

824
00:39:48,160 --> 00:39:49,239
Speaker 2: So how do they deal with it now?

825
00:39:49,239 --> 00:39:49,399
Speaker 4: Though?

826
00:39:49,440 --> 00:39:52,160
Speaker 2: Because I feel like he totally just disrespected her by

827
00:39:52,239 --> 00:39:54,480
Speaker 2: just going against her wishes.

828
00:39:54,600 --> 00:39:59,160
Speaker 3: Yes, he did, and she probably disrespected by the way

829
00:39:59,200 --> 00:40:02,879
Speaker 3: that she said no, and like probably didn't even make

830
00:40:02,880 --> 00:40:03,640
Speaker 3: it a discussion.

831
00:40:03,760 --> 00:40:05,279
Speaker 2: What if she did do it right, Let's give her

832
00:40:05,280 --> 00:40:08,320
Speaker 2: the benefit of the doubt. Let's give her the benefit

833
00:40:08,320 --> 00:40:10,279
Speaker 2: of the doubt that she did it right and was

834
00:40:10,320 --> 00:40:12,160
Speaker 2: just like, I really don't want you to go, and

835
00:40:12,200 --> 00:40:14,239
Speaker 2: he still went. How would she deal with that because

836
00:40:14,239 --> 00:40:16,839
Speaker 2: I'd be like, I feel disrespected.

837
00:40:17,120 --> 00:40:19,560
Speaker 3: That's really hard because I have a hard time thinking

838
00:40:19,600 --> 00:40:22,080
Speaker 3: she did it that way because he went. But let's

839
00:40:22,080 --> 00:40:25,879
Speaker 3: say he's just that big of an asshole and still went.

840
00:40:25,920 --> 00:40:29,160
Speaker 3: Even if she came from a good place, then she

841
00:40:29,200 --> 00:40:30,799
Speaker 3: has every right to. I mean, she has every right

842
00:40:30,840 --> 00:40:33,600
Speaker 3: to be upset anyway, but like she just needs to

843
00:40:33,640 --> 00:40:34,680
Speaker 3: continue to express it.

844
00:40:34,719 --> 00:40:37,480
Speaker 2: Be like, dude, in the future, when I'm.

845
00:40:37,360 --> 00:40:40,919
Speaker 3: Still sitting with me, just please, in the future, can

846
00:40:41,040 --> 00:40:44,279
Speaker 3: we agree that we can talk about it and you

847
00:40:44,280 --> 00:40:46,680
Speaker 3: can just come to me and tell me. So just

848
00:40:46,800 --> 00:40:49,759
Speaker 3: blatantly disrespecting me and leaving because that's not cool.

849
00:40:49,840 --> 00:40:51,759
Speaker 2: And let the resentment go. Don't let it stay, and

850
00:40:51,840 --> 00:40:53,360
Speaker 2: you talk about it and then let it go.

851
00:40:53,560 --> 00:40:56,120
Speaker 3: Yeah and yeah, Hannah, the more you remind him, though,

852
00:40:56,280 --> 00:41:00,319
Speaker 3: the more it's just gonna create a bigger divide, you know,

853
00:41:00,400 --> 00:41:02,759
Speaker 3: So the more you just keep rubbing it in his face,

854
00:41:02,760 --> 00:41:04,759
Speaker 3: So just try to Yeah, like Janna said, try to

855
00:41:04,800 --> 00:41:07,600
Speaker 3: let it go. We know it's hard. He's owning that

856
00:41:07,680 --> 00:41:10,239
Speaker 3: he messed up, so we just gotta swallow it.

857
00:41:12,360 --> 00:41:13,840
Speaker 2: Guys, I feel like that was a great show.

858
00:41:14,280 --> 00:41:14,800
Speaker 3: Great show.

859
00:41:15,160 --> 00:41:17,719
Speaker 2: Come a little close, baby, you can come closer to.

860
00:41:17,680 --> 00:41:20,040
Speaker 3: Me now I can like being kind of road.

861
00:41:21,000 --> 00:41:23,160
Speaker 2: You were just getting like too close to me. I

862
00:41:23,200 --> 00:41:24,160
Speaker 2: need my personal space.

863
00:41:24,160 --> 00:41:28,160
Speaker 3: Oh now you're too close. You don't walk intimacy, you know,

864
00:41:28,239 --> 00:41:30,040
Speaker 3: the guy actually tries to get close and intimate and

865
00:41:30,280 --> 00:41:35,919
Speaker 3: you're being roaded, So that's our show for today later