1 00:00:01,760 --> 00:00:04,600 Speaker 1: All the families were adapting from Uganda were always white people, 2 00:00:04,600 --> 00:00:06,920 Speaker 1: so that I never saw anyone who looks like me 3 00:00:07,320 --> 00:00:10,160 Speaker 1: who was doing what I saw but also being coronized 4 00:00:10,160 --> 00:00:11,080 Speaker 1: by the English. 5 00:00:11,160 --> 00:00:12,880 Speaker 2: I think we were toltal lie. 6 00:00:13,000 --> 00:00:15,920 Speaker 1: You know, certain people can do these things, and certain 7 00:00:15,960 --> 00:00:17,280 Speaker 1: people can do these things. 8 00:00:17,480 --> 00:00:22,880 Speaker 2: So for me, adaption was for these people, white people exactly. 9 00:00:23,120 --> 00:00:24,759 Speaker 3: Let's say, let's just speak. 10 00:00:24,640 --> 00:00:28,960 Speaker 2: We people white people, and then fixed that. 11 00:00:29,120 --> 00:00:31,880 Speaker 1: You know, I think for me is I can do 12 00:00:31,960 --> 00:00:34,520 Speaker 1: what I can do. You know, for me is changing 13 00:00:34,560 --> 00:00:37,519 Speaker 1: the native or the liar was told and leave the 14 00:00:37,520 --> 00:00:40,879 Speaker 1: opposite way. The white people can do this. I'm destined 15 00:00:40,880 --> 00:00:43,920 Speaker 1: to do this, you know. And for me, I said no, 16 00:00:44,200 --> 00:00:47,040 Speaker 1: that that that can't be, and I want to leave 17 00:00:47,080 --> 00:00:48,959 Speaker 1: a different way. 18 00:00:50,840 --> 00:00:53,920 Speaker 4: Welcome to an army of normal folks. I'm Bill Courtney. 19 00:00:54,360 --> 00:00:57,000 Speaker 4: I'm a normal guy. I'm a husband, I'm a father, 20 00:00:57,280 --> 00:01:00,280 Speaker 4: I'm an entrepreneur, and I've been a football coach in 21 00:01:00,400 --> 00:01:04,959 Speaker 4: inner city Memphis. And that last part incredibly led to 22 00:01:05,920 --> 00:01:09,720 Speaker 4: our film getting an oscar. That movie is called Undefeated. 23 00:01:10,600 --> 00:01:13,920 Speaker 4: I believe our country's problems are never gonna be solved 24 00:01:13,959 --> 00:01:17,000 Speaker 4: by a bunch of fancy people in nice suits. Using 25 00:01:17,120 --> 00:01:20,440 Speaker 4: big words that nobody ever uses on sinn and thoughts, 26 00:01:21,000 --> 00:01:26,200 Speaker 4: but rather by an army of normal folks. Y'all, that's us, 27 00:01:26,280 --> 00:01:29,479 Speaker 4: just you and me deciding, hey, maybe I can help. 28 00:01:30,080 --> 00:01:32,759 Speaker 3: That's what Peter Mudabazi, the voice you. 29 00:01:32,840 --> 00:01:37,440 Speaker 4: Just heard, has done. This Ugandan immigrant didn't accept the 30 00:01:37,520 --> 00:01:42,640 Speaker 4: cultural narrative that only married white people can foster kids, 31 00:01:43,640 --> 00:01:49,880 Speaker 4: and so far, this single dude has fostered forty seven kids. 32 00:01:50,280 --> 00:01:53,720 Speaker 4: He's adopted three of them, and he's in the process 33 00:01:53,960 --> 00:01:58,680 Speaker 4: of adopting two more. His radical love has also happened 34 00:01:58,680 --> 00:02:02,400 Speaker 4: to go viral, making him the most famous foster dad 35 00:02:02,440 --> 00:02:07,760 Speaker 4: in America with two point five million followers across social media. 36 00:02:08,480 --> 00:02:11,160 Speaker 4: I cannot wait for you to meet Peter. Right after 37 00:02:11,240 --> 00:02:43,000 Speaker 4: these brief messages from our general sponsors. 38 00:02:33,120 --> 00:02:35,320 Speaker 3: We have a great episode. 39 00:02:35,960 --> 00:02:38,960 Speaker 4: First of all, the guy you all are about to 40 00:02:39,000 --> 00:02:41,799 Speaker 4: be introduced to and I am going to screw this up. 41 00:02:42,040 --> 00:02:46,880 Speaker 3: I can do. Peter well, okay, last name Muda Bossi. 42 00:02:47,360 --> 00:02:48,920 Speaker 1: You got it right, did I do good? 43 00:02:49,080 --> 00:02:49,320 Speaker 3: Yes? 44 00:02:49,400 --> 00:02:56,280 Speaker 4: All right, Peter Muda BOSSI. I think that's Irish right. Okay, 45 00:02:56,520 --> 00:03:00,600 Speaker 4: he's here to join us. But this is another in 46 00:03:00,880 --> 00:03:06,600 Speaker 4: our series of luncheon listens. And today we're in Memphis, 47 00:03:06,600 --> 00:03:11,720 Speaker 4: hosted by a GAPE and we're going to open with 48 00:03:13,720 --> 00:03:18,800 Speaker 4: allowing our host to just tell us briefly about a 49 00:03:18,840 --> 00:03:23,760 Speaker 4: GAPE and what their mission is and why we're here today. 50 00:03:24,320 --> 00:03:27,560 Speaker 4: So because we're to lunch and listen all of you 51 00:03:27,680 --> 00:03:32,400 Speaker 4: people watching or hearing my voice. Now, there's probably forty 52 00:03:32,520 --> 00:03:35,680 Speaker 4: or fifty people in attendance for our lunche and listener 53 00:03:35,680 --> 00:03:39,600 Speaker 4: as usual, So everybody, let's give a kind welcome to 54 00:03:39,920 --> 00:03:44,760 Speaker 4: the CEO of a GAPE who just celebrated. 55 00:03:44,240 --> 00:03:45,320 Speaker 3: Thirty years here. 56 00:03:45,720 --> 00:03:48,160 Speaker 4: I think you know where the bathroom is by now, 57 00:03:49,040 --> 00:03:51,080 Speaker 4: David Jordan, come on up, David. 58 00:03:53,800 --> 00:03:54,480 Speaker 3: Bill, thank you. 59 00:03:55,200 --> 00:03:58,000 Speaker 5: It is so good Bill to have you in to 60 00:03:58,040 --> 00:03:59,960 Speaker 5: be a part of this in our team and visitor 61 00:04:00,440 --> 00:04:04,200 Speaker 5: who are here, Peter, my goodness, what a privilege to 62 00:04:04,280 --> 00:04:06,280 Speaker 5: have you so thank you for being here. 63 00:04:06,320 --> 00:04:06,640 Speaker 1: Thank you. 64 00:04:07,680 --> 00:04:11,240 Speaker 5: We are an army of normal folk doing this work, 65 00:04:11,760 --> 00:04:15,440 Speaker 5: the team here, the staff as we come alongside families 66 00:04:15,480 --> 00:04:18,240 Speaker 5: in communities, so a GUYPA Child and Family Services here 67 00:04:18,279 --> 00:04:23,360 Speaker 5: in Memphis. We fight poverty through God for families to flourish. 68 00:04:23,640 --> 00:04:24,440 Speaker 5: That's what we're about. 69 00:04:24,480 --> 00:04:24,960 Speaker 3: Every day. 70 00:04:25,279 --> 00:04:29,320 Speaker 5: We're deep in neighborhoods. We come alongside. In schools, we're 71 00:04:29,320 --> 00:04:33,840 Speaker 5: deep in churches where where people live, we walk alongside, holistically, 72 00:04:33,880 --> 00:04:41,520 Speaker 5: wrapping around for families to flourish spiritually, educationally, economically, relationally, systemically. 73 00:04:42,000 --> 00:04:44,600 Speaker 5: So we're thankful we just join you in being this 74 00:04:44,800 --> 00:04:48,080 Speaker 5: army of folk together. We're glad you're here, so bless 75 00:04:48,080 --> 00:04:49,480 Speaker 5: you and look forward to the show. 76 00:04:49,480 --> 00:04:53,839 Speaker 3: Thank you, thanks for having us, Thank you. All right, 77 00:04:54,040 --> 00:04:54,839 Speaker 3: So here we are. 78 00:04:56,040 --> 00:04:59,840 Speaker 4: I typically open with Peter, Welcome to Memphis, which I'm going, 79 00:05:00,360 --> 00:05:05,279 Speaker 4: but just as a setup. Peter's an author of a 80 00:05:05,320 --> 00:05:10,360 Speaker 4: book Love Does Not Conquer All and other surprising lessons 81 00:05:10,440 --> 00:05:15,679 Speaker 4: I learned as a foster dad to more than forty children. 82 00:05:17,720 --> 00:05:23,880 Speaker 4: Peter is uh is known as the foster dad flipper. 83 00:05:24,600 --> 00:05:27,640 Speaker 4: And that doesn't mean he flips kids. He flips he 84 00:05:27,680 --> 00:05:31,800 Speaker 4: flips houses. It is a foster dad. And then, of 85 00:05:31,839 --> 00:05:38,440 Speaker 4: course metaphorically, he has flipped an amazing number of children's lives. 86 00:05:39,040 --> 00:05:42,039 Speaker 3: So Peter, welcome to Memphis. 87 00:05:42,320 --> 00:05:43,720 Speaker 1: Thank you for having me here. 88 00:05:43,880 --> 00:05:45,680 Speaker 3: You flew in from Charlotte, Yes, this. 89 00:05:45,720 --> 00:05:47,280 Speaker 1: Morning, this morning? Yes? 90 00:05:47,480 --> 00:05:49,520 Speaker 3: Yeah? So are you staying tonight? Uh? 91 00:05:49,640 --> 00:05:52,560 Speaker 1: No, I'm going by Camme. I'm a single dad with 92 00:05:52,600 --> 00:05:55,680 Speaker 1: six children. You know, I want my house to not 93 00:05:55,760 --> 00:05:56,760 Speaker 1: be bunny down, so I have. 94 00:05:56,720 --> 00:06:00,400 Speaker 4: To go back. Well I guess, I guess baby sitting 95 00:06:00,440 --> 00:06:03,039 Speaker 4: services for six with cost a small fortune. 96 00:06:03,080 --> 00:06:06,040 Speaker 3: Anyways, you got to get back, got it? Okay? 97 00:06:06,160 --> 00:06:12,360 Speaker 4: So everybody, Peter's story is unique in a number of ways. 98 00:06:12,400 --> 00:06:18,279 Speaker 4: One because of the numbers of children he's affected. Two 99 00:06:18,320 --> 00:06:20,920 Speaker 4: because of the book, which, by the way, everybody, Peter 100 00:06:21,080 --> 00:06:23,400 Speaker 4: was kind enough to bring one, And at the end 101 00:06:23,480 --> 00:06:26,560 Speaker 4: of this it's complimentary to interview one and he is 102 00:06:26,600 --> 00:06:29,160 Speaker 4: going to sign it for you. Those of you who 103 00:06:29,160 --> 00:06:30,960 Speaker 4: are listening that didn't take the time to come to 104 00:06:31,040 --> 00:06:37,480 Speaker 4: lunch and listen, you miss out on that. Peter is 105 00:06:37,640 --> 00:06:41,680 Speaker 4: also interesting because in the story you will find out 106 00:06:41,839 --> 00:06:47,719 Speaker 4: why he thought he couldn't be a foster father, which 107 00:06:50,560 --> 00:06:57,400 Speaker 4: screams of social, cultural and systematic preconceived inaccuracies that we 108 00:06:57,560 --> 00:06:59,680 Speaker 4: just got to fix in this world. But we'll get 109 00:06:59,680 --> 00:07:04,760 Speaker 4: to that the meat of your story. But maybe most 110 00:07:04,839 --> 00:07:10,320 Speaker 4: uniquely is because this very American foster father, who has 111 00:07:10,400 --> 00:07:20,600 Speaker 4: this very American love of giving and service and philanthropic endeavors, 112 00:07:22,040 --> 00:07:27,400 Speaker 4: did not start out American at all. So first set 113 00:07:27,440 --> 00:07:29,720 Speaker 4: the stage for us for a few minutes, Peter and 114 00:07:29,880 --> 00:07:37,440 Speaker 4: just let everybody know the truth and candidly the trauma 115 00:07:38,600 --> 00:07:39,680 Speaker 4: of your childhood. 116 00:07:41,000 --> 00:07:42,320 Speaker 2: Yes, absolutely so. 117 00:07:42,360 --> 00:07:44,440 Speaker 1: By the way, I speak sivin languages or English is 118 00:07:44,440 --> 00:07:47,640 Speaker 1: my full language, so that means I might say something rude, 119 00:07:47,680 --> 00:07:47,880 Speaker 1: you know. 120 00:07:49,440 --> 00:07:50,800 Speaker 2: So he's why you can do through your. 121 00:07:50,720 --> 00:07:53,240 Speaker 1: iPhone at me and have two teenagers at home and 122 00:07:53,280 --> 00:07:58,000 Speaker 1: they will be able to use your iPhone. 123 00:07:56,880 --> 00:07:57,760 Speaker 2: Every night, you know. 124 00:07:58,440 --> 00:08:01,040 Speaker 1: Uh true. Yes, my name is Pizza Sabasi and I'm 125 00:08:01,080 --> 00:08:02,200 Speaker 1: originally from Uganda. 126 00:08:02,400 --> 00:08:04,760 Speaker 2: My dad is from Rwanda and my mom's from Uganda. 127 00:08:04,800 --> 00:08:07,600 Speaker 1: So that's why I get to speak so many languages 128 00:08:08,600 --> 00:08:09,360 Speaker 1: where I come from. 129 00:08:09,440 --> 00:08:10,520 Speaker 2: You know, most people. 130 00:08:10,280 --> 00:08:13,160 Speaker 1: Speak at least three and that's how I got to 131 00:08:13,240 --> 00:08:17,720 Speaker 1: really learn well. My background is sometimes it really had 132 00:08:17,720 --> 00:08:20,559 Speaker 1: to explain to American what life is as a street 133 00:08:20,680 --> 00:08:23,920 Speaker 1: kid or as a poor kid in Uganda. You know, 134 00:08:24,240 --> 00:08:26,800 Speaker 1: I grew up in a home where I was never 135 00:08:27,080 --> 00:08:28,520 Speaker 1: never told to be hopeful. 136 00:08:29,200 --> 00:08:31,600 Speaker 2: You know, hopeful was lying yourself. 137 00:08:31,680 --> 00:08:31,880 Speaker 3: You know. 138 00:08:32,200 --> 00:08:34,800 Speaker 1: I think this way that I had to go fetch 139 00:08:34,920 --> 00:08:39,000 Speaker 1: water three to four miles away one way and back 140 00:08:39,240 --> 00:08:41,040 Speaker 1: and twice a day. 141 00:08:41,160 --> 00:08:41,600 Speaker 2: We could not. 142 00:08:41,679 --> 00:08:43,760 Speaker 1: Afford to buy food, so we had to grow the food. 143 00:08:43,840 --> 00:08:46,320 Speaker 1: So my mom spent most of the time in the garden, 144 00:08:46,600 --> 00:08:50,080 Speaker 1: so she wasn't there to take care of us. In 145 00:08:50,120 --> 00:08:52,679 Speaker 1: a way, that's how she was taking care of us. 146 00:08:52,840 --> 00:08:56,240 Speaker 1: But we had to mature very very early to be 147 00:08:56,280 --> 00:08:57,920 Speaker 1: able to provide for the family. So at the age 148 00:08:57,960 --> 00:08:59,960 Speaker 1: of four, I can go fetch to wars by myself, 149 00:09:00,160 --> 00:09:02,440 Speaker 1: and back at the age of five, I can cook 150 00:09:02,480 --> 00:09:04,959 Speaker 1: food for my siblings. You know that you had to 151 00:09:05,080 --> 00:09:08,280 Speaker 1: learn so fast in order to be there for your family. 152 00:09:08,040 --> 00:09:10,559 Speaker 4: When it takes when it's four miles to get water 153 00:09:11,440 --> 00:09:15,079 Speaker 4: and four miles back and that's twice to day. How 154 00:09:15,080 --> 00:09:17,640 Speaker 4: do you find time to go to school. 155 00:09:17,400 --> 00:09:20,160 Speaker 2: As a child, Well, you don't go to school. 156 00:09:20,240 --> 00:09:23,400 Speaker 1: You know that my family could not afford five dollars 157 00:09:23,520 --> 00:09:24,640 Speaker 1: to send me to school. 158 00:09:25,000 --> 00:09:26,040 Speaker 2: But also because. 159 00:09:25,720 --> 00:09:28,120 Speaker 1: My mom needed that help that I needed to be 160 00:09:28,200 --> 00:09:31,480 Speaker 1: part of the family, I provide and do the things 161 00:09:31,520 --> 00:09:35,960 Speaker 1: that she needed or she could not do in a way. Yep. 162 00:09:37,000 --> 00:09:44,240 Speaker 4: So in addition to growing up early and no education formally, 163 00:09:45,800 --> 00:09:51,760 Speaker 4: which is the reality of many children where you come from, 164 00:09:52,559 --> 00:09:53,920 Speaker 4: you also dealt with abuse. 165 00:09:54,760 --> 00:09:55,920 Speaker 2: Craigs, Yes, you know. 166 00:09:56,360 --> 00:09:58,520 Speaker 1: So at the age of four, I began to realize 167 00:09:58,520 --> 00:10:01,040 Speaker 1: that my father was different from other dads. You know, 168 00:10:01,920 --> 00:10:04,400 Speaker 1: for me, before I went to bed and when I 169 00:10:04,440 --> 00:10:06,160 Speaker 1: woke up, these are the words that I had from 170 00:10:06,160 --> 00:10:06,600 Speaker 1: my dad. 171 00:10:07,400 --> 00:10:10,920 Speaker 2: Peter. You're worthless, Peter, you never mount anything. 172 00:10:11,280 --> 00:10:14,440 Speaker 1: Peter. I wish you were never born so I did 173 00:10:14,480 --> 00:10:18,720 Speaker 1: not have to feed you. So when you hear that 174 00:10:18,760 --> 00:10:21,280 Speaker 1: from the passion that should provide those for you or 175 00:10:21,320 --> 00:10:23,840 Speaker 1: take care of you, it's really hard to think you 176 00:10:23,880 --> 00:10:28,240 Speaker 1: have an extra day. And it wasn't just to me, 177 00:10:28,360 --> 00:10:30,600 Speaker 1: but also to my mom, my mom, you know, so 178 00:10:30,640 --> 00:10:32,760 Speaker 1: the same abus that was coming towards me was also 179 00:10:32,800 --> 00:10:35,520 Speaker 1: coming to my mom. And as a kid and the oldest, 180 00:10:35,760 --> 00:10:39,600 Speaker 1: sometimes you're afraid of saying what you need are because 181 00:10:39,600 --> 00:10:41,560 Speaker 1: you want to protect your mom. So I could never 182 00:10:41,600 --> 00:10:45,040 Speaker 1: say I'm hungry. He's why every time my mom went 183 00:10:45,080 --> 00:10:47,079 Speaker 1: to my dad and said the kids have not eaten 184 00:10:47,160 --> 00:10:50,800 Speaker 1: for days, she got beatings for them. So as a kid, 185 00:10:51,840 --> 00:10:55,560 Speaker 1: you always in order to protect your mom, you can't 186 00:10:55,559 --> 00:11:00,199 Speaker 1: say you're hungry, because it was the best way you 187 00:11:00,200 --> 00:11:04,559 Speaker 1: you could protect her. But in that way, but also 188 00:11:04,600 --> 00:11:08,040 Speaker 1: you're starving in a sense. So for me, I couldn't 189 00:11:08,280 --> 00:11:10,560 Speaker 1: hope for tomorrow. I couldn't hope for the next day. 190 00:11:11,200 --> 00:11:11,520 Speaker 3: Uh. 191 00:11:11,679 --> 00:11:13,480 Speaker 2: That for me you know, I don't know how to pray, 192 00:11:13,559 --> 00:11:15,319 Speaker 2: but I wish such a day ended. 193 00:11:15,080 --> 00:11:18,080 Speaker 1: There, you know. And that was every day and that's 194 00:11:18,080 --> 00:11:21,200 Speaker 1: what was our lives as kids. That there was poverty 195 00:11:21,240 --> 00:11:24,480 Speaker 1: outside waiting, but there was abuse inside the home. So 196 00:11:24,520 --> 00:11:26,960 Speaker 1: there was no place that you can go and say 197 00:11:27,120 --> 00:11:29,160 Speaker 1: maybe I'm a little safe here. The only time I 198 00:11:29,160 --> 00:11:32,760 Speaker 1: felt selfe was feting water that walk of and I 199 00:11:32,800 --> 00:11:35,480 Speaker 1: want to have to go get water was the safest 200 00:11:35,520 --> 00:11:38,679 Speaker 1: way or to feel unsafe, you know. But again you 201 00:11:38,800 --> 00:11:41,600 Speaker 1: go to get water there, you know, the animals are 202 00:11:41,679 --> 00:11:45,559 Speaker 1: in the water, the shipherds are there, so most time 203 00:11:45,679 --> 00:11:48,839 Speaker 1: you also get the beating or you gotta wait as well. 204 00:11:49,240 --> 00:11:52,880 Speaker 1: So there wasn't really a room like at one time 205 00:11:52,960 --> 00:11:55,800 Speaker 1: place where you can say I'm safe at all. And 206 00:11:55,840 --> 00:11:58,240 Speaker 1: that was for me as a kid. 207 00:12:04,920 --> 00:12:08,440 Speaker 4: And now a few messages from our generous sponsors. But first, 208 00:12:09,040 --> 00:12:12,840 Speaker 4: are you following us on Instagram? More than likely or not? 209 00:12:13,120 --> 00:12:16,520 Speaker 4: But you should be because it's awesome and we're cool. 210 00:12:17,160 --> 00:12:20,720 Speaker 4: We've briefly mentioned a few times this cool normal Folks 211 00:12:20,760 --> 00:12:24,720 Speaker 4: Wisdom feature that we've started doing there where we distill 212 00:12:24,880 --> 00:12:28,559 Speaker 4: down the most powerful points, data and quotes from our 213 00:12:28,640 --> 00:12:34,440 Speaker 4: guests into punchy text because normal folks got wisdom too, 214 00:12:34,840 --> 00:12:36,640 Speaker 4: and it's fun and a quick way of getting it 215 00:12:36,679 --> 00:12:39,840 Speaker 4: from them. I've even started writing them out on a 216 00:12:39,880 --> 00:12:43,040 Speaker 4: coach's clipboard because I'm a coach and you guys need 217 00:12:43,080 --> 00:12:47,319 Speaker 4: to see graphics and they are I polluting graphics. So 218 00:12:48,240 --> 00:12:53,320 Speaker 4: get on it. Follow us on Instagram at Army of 219 00:12:53,440 --> 00:12:57,640 Speaker 4: Normal Folks to check out normal folks Wisdom and other 220 00:12:57,800 --> 00:13:18,360 Speaker 4: inspirational content. We'll be right back when reading this part 221 00:13:18,400 --> 00:13:27,920 Speaker 4: of your story. This may sound weird, but my heart 222 00:13:27,920 --> 00:13:31,600 Speaker 4: broke for your father. And the reason my heart broke 223 00:13:31,640 --> 00:13:36,200 Speaker 4: for your father is he wished you were never born 224 00:13:36,280 --> 00:13:40,440 Speaker 4: because he didn't have to feed you. And if your 225 00:13:40,440 --> 00:13:43,280 Speaker 4: mom spoke up and said, our children haven't eaten for 226 00:13:43,320 --> 00:13:47,880 Speaker 4: two days, they're hungry, and he would beat her. The 227 00:13:47,960 --> 00:13:51,480 Speaker 4: truth is he was acting out on his recognition of 228 00:13:51,520 --> 00:13:56,320 Speaker 4: his own inability to care for his family, and I 229 00:13:56,360 --> 00:13:58,800 Speaker 4: think he hated himself more than he hated. 230 00:13:58,720 --> 00:13:59,440 Speaker 3: All of y'all. 231 00:14:01,120 --> 00:14:07,040 Speaker 4: But that's that's the relationship between poverty and in an 232 00:14:07,080 --> 00:14:10,760 Speaker 4: ability to get out of it in a generational sense. 233 00:14:10,840 --> 00:14:14,920 Speaker 4: And although that was all the way in Africa, I 234 00:14:14,960 --> 00:14:17,280 Speaker 4: feel like that exists in our midst too here. 235 00:14:18,360 --> 00:14:19,680 Speaker 3: What do you think about that thought? 236 00:14:21,400 --> 00:14:23,840 Speaker 1: Yes, absolutely, I mean I'm a single forced dad. I 237 00:14:24,120 --> 00:14:25,840 Speaker 1: get to see that. I get to to talk to 238 00:14:25,880 --> 00:14:31,240 Speaker 1: the dads who sometimes are viable, abusive and physical to 239 00:14:31,600 --> 00:14:32,920 Speaker 1: their children and their wives. 240 00:14:34,280 --> 00:14:37,000 Speaker 2: U Sometimes they feel I can't provide. 241 00:14:37,080 --> 00:14:40,280 Speaker 1: So you're asking me, it's taking me off, you know, 242 00:14:40,720 --> 00:14:44,000 Speaker 1: So I'm gonna lash at you instead of providing, go 243 00:14:44,120 --> 00:14:47,040 Speaker 1: instead of saying I've tried and I cannot, or let's 244 00:14:47,120 --> 00:14:49,200 Speaker 1: work together and see how we can provide for a family. 245 00:14:49,800 --> 00:14:53,760 Speaker 1: Usually when men cannot, you know, they result to the abuse. 246 00:14:53,960 --> 00:14:55,800 Speaker 3: Do you think your father grew up the same way. 247 00:14:56,920 --> 00:14:59,360 Speaker 1: I don't know. I don't have so much background of 248 00:14:59,520 --> 00:15:01,800 Speaker 1: how he grew up. You know, to me, he was 249 00:15:01,840 --> 00:15:04,160 Speaker 1: just different from other men that I knew. You know, 250 00:15:04,360 --> 00:15:07,400 Speaker 1: I had uncles who were kind, but he was just 251 00:15:07,520 --> 00:15:11,160 Speaker 1: mean at any time. And you didn't know where it 252 00:15:11,240 --> 00:15:14,080 Speaker 1: was coming. You know, you could be sitting here, if 253 00:15:14,080 --> 00:15:16,440 Speaker 1: it's holding this bottle, that's what came towards you. If 254 00:15:16,480 --> 00:15:18,800 Speaker 1: it was you're eating that food came towards you. So 255 00:15:18,840 --> 00:15:27,720 Speaker 1: there was no sense of being human in a way horrific. 256 00:15:28,720 --> 00:15:34,120 Speaker 4: So at ten, you said you probably didn't know Spanish, 257 00:15:34,200 --> 00:15:35,920 Speaker 4: at that time, but I would just say you said 258 00:15:35,960 --> 00:15:37,920 Speaker 4: adios at ten. 259 00:15:40,960 --> 00:15:44,560 Speaker 1: So, you know, for me, I knew I was going 260 00:15:44,640 --> 00:15:47,280 Speaker 1: to die. But I knew my father would take my life. 261 00:15:47,280 --> 00:15:49,000 Speaker 1: So in my head as a ten year old, I thought, 262 00:15:49,280 --> 00:15:51,280 Speaker 1: why give him the opportunity to do so? 263 00:15:51,440 --> 00:15:52,080 Speaker 2: Like why? 264 00:15:52,720 --> 00:15:54,040 Speaker 1: So one day he said, he said me to go 265 00:15:54,080 --> 00:15:56,840 Speaker 1: fetch water and not to go get cigarettes at three 266 00:15:56,840 --> 00:15:58,600 Speaker 1: in the morning. You know, as a ten year old, 267 00:15:59,040 --> 00:16:01,160 Speaker 1: you know the dogs you you're afraid, you know. So 268 00:16:01,200 --> 00:16:03,640 Speaker 1: for me, I went to get the cigarettes. But all 269 00:16:03,760 --> 00:16:07,360 Speaker 1: the way it ran, so the cigarettes got damage. So 270 00:16:07,440 --> 00:16:09,440 Speaker 1: I knew, okay, I don't have the cigarettes. I'm going 271 00:16:09,520 --> 00:16:12,040 Speaker 1: to go home and get the beatings, you know, But 272 00:16:12,240 --> 00:16:15,280 Speaker 1: why I'm going to die anyway. So for me, instead 273 00:16:15,280 --> 00:16:18,120 Speaker 1: of going home, I walked to the bus station at 274 00:16:18,160 --> 00:16:20,640 Speaker 1: ten miles away. Walked to the bus station and I 275 00:16:20,680 --> 00:16:22,520 Speaker 1: got there and I asked the lady here, of all 276 00:16:22,560 --> 00:16:25,800 Speaker 1: these buses, which one goes the farthest for me? Why, 277 00:16:25,840 --> 00:16:27,960 Speaker 1: I asked, was I wanted to go as far as 278 00:16:28,000 --> 00:16:30,120 Speaker 1: I could so he would never get to see me. 279 00:16:30,400 --> 00:16:33,040 Speaker 1: But also when I die, he would never have the 280 00:16:33,160 --> 00:16:35,920 Speaker 1: joy of burying me. That was my my thinking as 281 00:16:35,960 --> 00:16:38,280 Speaker 1: a ten year old, like, I will not give you 282 00:16:38,360 --> 00:16:41,480 Speaker 1: any opportunity take my life or even burrow me. So 283 00:16:41,520 --> 00:16:43,600 Speaker 1: that's why I asked the lady which one goes the father, 284 00:16:43,640 --> 00:16:46,360 Speaker 1: and she said that one and I go on the bus. Absolutely, 285 00:16:46,400 --> 00:16:48,520 Speaker 1: I had never been twenty miles away from my village. 286 00:16:48,720 --> 00:16:50,760 Speaker 3: So for you idea where the bus was going. 287 00:16:50,640 --> 00:16:54,280 Speaker 1: No, just the farthest farthest can go, you know, at ten. 288 00:16:54,200 --> 00:16:59,040 Speaker 2: Years old, ten years old and you ended up in Compiler. 289 00:16:59,760 --> 00:17:01,960 Speaker 3: That how many hours away? 290 00:17:02,240 --> 00:17:05,240 Speaker 1: Well that's by then it took about maybe sixteen hours 291 00:17:05,280 --> 00:17:07,639 Speaker 1: to get there from my village, you know, So I 292 00:17:07,680 --> 00:17:10,080 Speaker 1: went five hundred kilometers away from my village. 293 00:17:11,000 --> 00:17:15,120 Speaker 2: So to me, you know, all I can remember by the. 294 00:17:15,080 --> 00:17:18,960 Speaker 1: Time I arrived, my legs were swollen that I could 295 00:17:18,960 --> 00:17:20,960 Speaker 1: not walk that much because for me, I was afraid 296 00:17:21,000 --> 00:17:23,520 Speaker 1: that every time the bus stopped that my father would 297 00:17:23,520 --> 00:17:25,800 Speaker 1: be behind me. So I push, as a ten year 298 00:17:25,800 --> 00:17:29,040 Speaker 1: old push the bus. You know, in my head, I 299 00:17:29,040 --> 00:17:32,119 Speaker 1: thought I was helping the bust move, but I wasn't, 300 00:17:32,200 --> 00:17:32,399 Speaker 1: you know. 301 00:17:33,440 --> 00:17:34,680 Speaker 2: And that's how I realized. 302 00:17:34,720 --> 00:17:37,280 Speaker 1: When I got to Compeler and had one option, one 303 00:17:37,280 --> 00:17:39,320 Speaker 1: option was to be a street kid. So right there 304 00:17:39,359 --> 00:17:41,879 Speaker 1: and then I knew this is going to be my 305 00:17:41,920 --> 00:17:43,960 Speaker 1: life for now. 306 00:17:44,320 --> 00:17:47,720 Speaker 4: So describe to us briefly with a street kid and 307 00:17:47,800 --> 00:17:52,560 Speaker 4: the capitol is I gotta believe that's the kids that 308 00:17:52,800 --> 00:17:56,240 Speaker 4: we shoe away from our windows when they're trying to 309 00:17:56,280 --> 00:17:59,359 Speaker 4: scrounge up a quarter. Those are the kids we shoe 310 00:17:59,400 --> 00:18:03,119 Speaker 4: away when begging for food or asking for this or 311 00:18:03,160 --> 00:18:10,159 Speaker 4: asking for that. We've all seen the overgeneralized videos and 312 00:18:10,880 --> 00:18:16,639 Speaker 4: images of what we think that looks like. What is 313 00:18:16,680 --> 00:18:17,880 Speaker 4: it to be a street kid? 314 00:18:18,000 --> 00:18:19,920 Speaker 3: Really? From a former street kid. 315 00:18:21,760 --> 00:18:24,439 Speaker 1: That's again hard to experience on American because there's nothing 316 00:18:24,480 --> 00:18:27,159 Speaker 1: in the United States that you have the leaves like 317 00:18:27,200 --> 00:18:28,359 Speaker 1: a streetch out. 318 00:18:28,200 --> 00:18:30,240 Speaker 2: In Uganda or in Kenya or anywhere. 319 00:18:30,600 --> 00:18:33,480 Speaker 1: You know, your street animals live a better life than 320 00:18:33,560 --> 00:18:36,720 Speaker 1: most kids we live alive. So think this way. I 321 00:18:36,960 --> 00:18:39,320 Speaker 1: slept in the sore so in the middle of the compound. 322 00:18:39,359 --> 00:18:42,600 Speaker 1: There was a sewer canw that smells stinching all but 323 00:18:42,680 --> 00:18:43,320 Speaker 1: that's where. 324 00:18:43,119 --> 00:18:44,440 Speaker 2: We slipped as street kids. 325 00:18:44,440 --> 00:18:48,040 Speaker 1: Why because normal people didn't go there, So for us 326 00:18:48,119 --> 00:18:50,400 Speaker 1: that was a safe place for us. You know though 327 00:18:50,440 --> 00:18:54,320 Speaker 1: it smelled, but it was just better way to avoid 328 00:18:54,359 --> 00:18:57,000 Speaker 1: any abuse from anyone else. You know. The other part 329 00:18:57,040 --> 00:18:59,480 Speaker 1: is that's who I went through the garbage as well. 330 00:19:00,040 --> 00:19:01,880 Speaker 1: Most people didn't like us, so they would throw away 331 00:19:02,040 --> 00:19:04,880 Speaker 1: the food in the garbage, so we had to run. 332 00:19:05,000 --> 00:19:07,440 Speaker 1: So if I live next to the garbage, that means 333 00:19:07,600 --> 00:19:10,320 Speaker 1: I will be the dog before the dog gets that food. 334 00:19:10,800 --> 00:19:12,680 Speaker 1: So that's kind of the life that you lived, where 335 00:19:12,720 --> 00:19:15,800 Speaker 1: you're seeing as less of a human being, seen more 336 00:19:15,920 --> 00:19:19,160 Speaker 1: like a stray animal. And that's how we're treated every day, 337 00:19:19,200 --> 00:19:22,000 Speaker 1: every night, every hour of your life. That that's how 338 00:19:22,000 --> 00:19:24,960 Speaker 1: they saw you. And you believed this also as well, 339 00:19:25,000 --> 00:19:26,280 Speaker 1: because people said, hey. 340 00:19:26,280 --> 00:19:26,800 Speaker 2: You stink. 341 00:19:26,880 --> 00:19:31,040 Speaker 1: Well we never took showers, you know, and also we worked. 342 00:19:31,160 --> 00:19:34,200 Speaker 1: They used us in a way that we found ways 343 00:19:34,200 --> 00:19:36,960 Speaker 1: of how to steal food by those who used I 344 00:19:37,000 --> 00:19:39,560 Speaker 1: know you're gonna get cheap laver, but before I get it, 345 00:19:39,640 --> 00:19:42,520 Speaker 1: I'm also get something to eat, you know. So in 346 00:19:42,560 --> 00:19:44,719 Speaker 1: a way, it's how they treated us. That's how they 347 00:19:44,720 --> 00:19:47,520 Speaker 1: saw us, and we believed every word they thought of 348 00:19:47,600 --> 00:19:50,600 Speaker 1: us less of human being. And that's how truly I 349 00:19:50,640 --> 00:19:53,399 Speaker 1: believe myself that I was in as a human as 350 00:19:53,440 --> 00:19:55,639 Speaker 1: anyone else because of how I was treated. 351 00:19:56,720 --> 00:19:59,320 Speaker 4: And you learned all these street kids learned how to 352 00:19:59,400 --> 00:20:03,840 Speaker 4: hustle up. Some money, how to hustle up some food 353 00:20:04,680 --> 00:20:10,720 Speaker 4: and that street smarts. Hustling up led you to be 354 00:20:10,920 --> 00:20:13,320 Speaker 4: introduced to a man one day. 355 00:20:14,400 --> 00:20:16,600 Speaker 1: Great, so as street kids for us, we you know 356 00:20:16,640 --> 00:20:19,200 Speaker 1: by then, you know, this is in the eighties, most 357 00:20:19,200 --> 00:20:21,680 Speaker 1: people didn't make a dot or seventy five cents a day, 358 00:20:21,800 --> 00:20:24,000 Speaker 1: you know, so most people didn't make that, So we 359 00:20:24,040 --> 00:20:27,879 Speaker 1: didn't steal money, but rather hustle for food, you know, 360 00:20:28,240 --> 00:20:30,359 Speaker 1: and that's why people used us. So think this way 361 00:20:30,600 --> 00:20:33,720 Speaker 1: that you have a market place where people bring their produce, 362 00:20:34,160 --> 00:20:36,640 Speaker 1: but these women and men have to move these produce 363 00:20:36,680 --> 00:20:37,720 Speaker 1: from one end to the other. 364 00:20:37,880 --> 00:20:39,119 Speaker 2: So that's how we would. 365 00:20:38,960 --> 00:20:42,280 Speaker 1: Be used as carry these potatoes from here to there. 366 00:20:42,880 --> 00:20:44,919 Speaker 1: And if you don't, I'm gonna I'm gonna hit you. 367 00:20:45,760 --> 00:20:48,760 Speaker 1: So you do so, but in that doing so, you 368 00:20:48,880 --> 00:20:50,879 Speaker 1: get one banana. And we had a strategy. We can 369 00:20:50,960 --> 00:20:55,240 Speaker 1: only steal what we can roast when we burn the trash, 370 00:20:55,320 --> 00:20:57,520 Speaker 1: so we couldn't take anything that needed a pint, not 371 00:20:57,760 --> 00:21:03,120 Speaker 1: only potatoes, cassava, ash, potatoes, things that we can ross 372 00:21:03,160 --> 00:21:06,560 Speaker 1: while we are burning anything. And so that is how 373 00:21:06,960 --> 00:21:10,119 Speaker 1: we were able to survive. You know, get used, but 374 00:21:10,200 --> 00:21:13,520 Speaker 1: while you're being used, find a way to eat. So 375 00:21:13,520 --> 00:21:17,439 Speaker 1: so like women sometimes that would use us in a 376 00:21:17,480 --> 00:21:20,639 Speaker 1: sexual way that you knew they're asking me what they 377 00:21:20,680 --> 00:21:22,560 Speaker 1: want and so I'll give it to them. 378 00:21:22,720 --> 00:21:24,520 Speaker 2: But knowing at the end of that that she would 379 00:21:24,520 --> 00:21:25,880 Speaker 2: give you something to eat, you know. 380 00:21:26,160 --> 00:21:28,520 Speaker 1: So you worked for that food. That's all you worked 381 00:21:28,520 --> 00:21:32,040 Speaker 1: for in a way from anyone. The buses remember they 382 00:21:32,040 --> 00:21:35,120 Speaker 1: came from all other cities and came packed right there. 383 00:21:35,200 --> 00:21:36,639 Speaker 2: So for as the streak. 384 00:21:36,400 --> 00:21:38,440 Speaker 1: Kids, we're the ones who are to wash the buses 385 00:21:38,600 --> 00:21:42,080 Speaker 1: and clean them while cleaning them because while you're cleaning, 386 00:21:42,400 --> 00:21:44,600 Speaker 1: you're going to find a potato that fell off, you know, 387 00:21:45,240 --> 00:21:47,800 Speaker 1: or while you're removing them, you leave the bananas on 388 00:21:47,880 --> 00:21:50,200 Speaker 1: top because you know when you go cleaning there will 389 00:21:50,240 --> 00:21:53,400 Speaker 1: be a meal there. So that was what we used 390 00:21:53,480 --> 00:21:57,280 Speaker 1: to do every day so and survive. Use me, I 391 00:21:57,400 --> 00:21:59,159 Speaker 1: find a way to use you to get something in 392 00:21:59,200 --> 00:22:02,200 Speaker 1: a way. So that was my life for five years. 393 00:22:02,440 --> 00:22:04,959 Speaker 1: So one day, so as treakies, we learned how we 394 00:22:04,960 --> 00:22:07,560 Speaker 1: were always in a group, the group of tins, because 395 00:22:07,600 --> 00:22:09,959 Speaker 1: the older one would abuse us as well or use us. 396 00:22:09,960 --> 00:22:12,280 Speaker 1: So if they wanted to steal a tire, they will say, 397 00:22:12,760 --> 00:22:16,160 Speaker 1: if you don't get that tire, for me, I'll slash you, 398 00:22:16,160 --> 00:22:18,920 Speaker 1: you know. So you get to learn how to literally 399 00:22:18,960 --> 00:22:21,880 Speaker 1: steal a tire in five seconds. But you knew who 400 00:22:21,880 --> 00:22:24,119 Speaker 1: you're giving two But you knew you've been in trouble 401 00:22:24,160 --> 00:22:26,240 Speaker 1: if you didn't do so, you know. So that's why 402 00:22:26,240 --> 00:22:28,720 Speaker 1: we had to stay in groups of what our agements 403 00:22:28,800 --> 00:22:34,200 Speaker 1: were to survive. So we also knew if I steal 404 00:22:34,240 --> 00:22:36,880 Speaker 1: food from you and you give it to me, that 405 00:22:37,040 --> 00:22:39,640 Speaker 1: means I'll be the face of everyone else in the back, 406 00:22:39,880 --> 00:22:42,720 Speaker 1: you know, because you gave me food, they will always 407 00:22:42,760 --> 00:22:44,879 Speaker 1: forward me to give you food or to give me 408 00:22:44,920 --> 00:22:46,760 Speaker 1: food because at the end of the day we all 409 00:22:46,760 --> 00:22:48,600 Speaker 1: put them together and share. 410 00:22:49,200 --> 00:22:52,040 Speaker 2: So we knew who we can steal food from. 411 00:22:52,119 --> 00:22:56,480 Speaker 1: So you had to be wearing glasses, shoes and khakis. 412 00:22:59,119 --> 00:23:01,120 Speaker 3: Boy, I would have been a mark all day. 413 00:23:01,200 --> 00:23:03,480 Speaker 1: Lord absolutely got shoes, I. 414 00:23:03,440 --> 00:23:05,119 Speaker 3: Got khakis, and I got glasses. 415 00:23:05,320 --> 00:23:07,600 Speaker 1: Yeah, so any of you, if you have khakies, you know, 416 00:23:07,680 --> 00:23:10,199 Speaker 1: glasses and shoes, watch out for your wallet. I promise 417 00:23:10,280 --> 00:23:13,160 Speaker 1: you know, it might not make it to where you're going, 418 00:23:13,280 --> 00:23:15,640 Speaker 1: you know. So that's kind of how we lunch. Who 419 00:23:15,640 --> 00:23:18,080 Speaker 1: can afford food or who we can steal from in 420 00:23:18,119 --> 00:23:18,679 Speaker 1: a way, you know. 421 00:23:18,960 --> 00:23:20,080 Speaker 2: So For me, I saw a mark. 422 00:23:20,119 --> 00:23:22,680 Speaker 1: I said, I'm gonna follow this guy, and as soon 423 00:23:22,680 --> 00:23:23,960 Speaker 1: as his boy's food. 424 00:23:23,680 --> 00:23:25,119 Speaker 2: I'm gonna take it, you know. 425 00:23:25,440 --> 00:23:27,359 Speaker 1: And the way we will do it is you're gonna 426 00:23:27,400 --> 00:23:30,520 Speaker 1: carry it before he says anything. Because if you can't ask, 427 00:23:30,640 --> 00:23:32,880 Speaker 1: like I'm gonna take it, you better show me where 428 00:23:32,880 --> 00:23:36,920 Speaker 1: you're going because if you don't, it might end up somewhere. 429 00:23:37,200 --> 00:23:38,840 Speaker 2: But also you have no time to say no. 430 00:23:39,480 --> 00:23:41,680 Speaker 1: So I got to get this food from this guy 431 00:23:41,680 --> 00:23:43,800 Speaker 1: and he said, hey, put my foot down. I put 432 00:23:43,800 --> 00:23:47,239 Speaker 1: his food down, and then he followed by asking me 433 00:23:47,280 --> 00:23:50,560 Speaker 1: something that nobody ever asked me, said hey, what is 434 00:23:50,640 --> 00:23:55,119 Speaker 1: your name? And that rollwed me that this person wanted 435 00:23:55,160 --> 00:23:59,440 Speaker 1: to know my name, but also his why for everyone 436 00:23:59,680 --> 00:24:02,600 Speaker 1: was mind was also abusive at the same time. So 437 00:24:02,680 --> 00:24:06,480 Speaker 1: for me, him asking me my name was oh, no, 438 00:24:07,200 --> 00:24:10,119 Speaker 1: you're gonna do something to me, you know. But also 439 00:24:10,320 --> 00:24:13,960 Speaker 1: it wollowed me because for five years, no one human 440 00:24:13,960 --> 00:24:17,440 Speaker 1: being had ever asked me what my name was, no one, 441 00:24:17,520 --> 00:24:20,400 Speaker 1: no one I ever said what is your name? 442 00:24:24,800 --> 00:24:25,680 Speaker 3: We'll be right back. 443 00:24:38,040 --> 00:24:39,359 Speaker 2: We have people who. 444 00:24:39,359 --> 00:24:42,800 Speaker 1: Begging in our city in the United States. I dare 445 00:24:42,880 --> 00:24:45,639 Speaker 1: you one day before you give them and even if 446 00:24:45,680 --> 00:24:48,120 Speaker 1: you didn't give it anything, say hey, what is your name? 447 00:24:48,440 --> 00:24:52,240 Speaker 1: You see how they will look at you because none 448 00:24:52,280 --> 00:24:54,240 Speaker 1: of us ever get When. 449 00:24:54,000 --> 00:24:57,919 Speaker 4: I read that, I thought about the ninety times in 450 00:24:57,960 --> 00:25:02,720 Speaker 4: the last three years I've pulled up to an Exon 451 00:25:02,880 --> 00:25:06,800 Speaker 4: or a stop and go or outside of Walgreens and 452 00:25:07,000 --> 00:25:12,760 Speaker 4: somebody homeless walks up to me. I've never I've Sometimes 453 00:25:12,840 --> 00:25:15,080 Speaker 4: I will go in store and buy water and given 454 00:25:15,160 --> 00:25:17,720 Speaker 4: to them. Sometimes, if I have a dollar and they 455 00:25:17,760 --> 00:25:22,119 Speaker 4: don't look completely ridiculous, I'll give them a dollar. Sometimes 456 00:25:22,160 --> 00:25:24,840 Speaker 4: I'll give them a little coupon for a night at 457 00:25:24,840 --> 00:25:30,400 Speaker 4: the Union Mission. I don't think I've ever asked, hey, 458 00:25:30,440 --> 00:25:31,000 Speaker 4: what's your name? 459 00:25:31,720 --> 00:25:32,000 Speaker 3: Once? 460 00:25:34,200 --> 00:25:38,119 Speaker 4: And it's just so human for someone to want to 461 00:25:38,160 --> 00:25:40,959 Speaker 4: know your name. And so when I read that about you, 462 00:25:41,000 --> 00:25:43,879 Speaker 4: I thought about my own interaction as the guy with 463 00:25:43,960 --> 00:25:46,679 Speaker 4: the khaki and the glasses and the shoes, and I 464 00:25:46,760 --> 00:25:49,560 Speaker 4: myself has never asked what's your name? 465 00:25:49,760 --> 00:25:51,760 Speaker 2: Yes, so if I may ask you what's your name? 466 00:25:52,920 --> 00:25:53,360 Speaker 3: What? 467 00:25:53,359 --> 00:25:54,000 Speaker 1: What's your name? 468 00:25:54,200 --> 00:25:54,480 Speaker 3: Bill? 469 00:25:54,800 --> 00:25:58,520 Speaker 2: Bill? But we know you Bill, and we either coach 470 00:25:58,560 --> 00:25:59,800 Speaker 2: why you get to do or what. 471 00:26:00,200 --> 00:26:03,200 Speaker 1: You're known for, and that makes you unique and human, 472 00:26:03,560 --> 00:26:07,000 Speaker 1: you know, so for us, not when when you ask 473 00:26:07,040 --> 00:26:11,800 Speaker 1: a homeless person, you're basically assuming they don't live in 474 00:26:11,520 --> 00:26:14,160 Speaker 1: the same arena as you are, so you're gonna treat 475 00:26:14,200 --> 00:26:16,160 Speaker 1: them less. I don't deserve to get to know your name, 476 00:26:16,440 --> 00:26:18,199 Speaker 1: or I don't want to, you know. So for me 477 00:26:18,240 --> 00:26:20,560 Speaker 1: when you ask my name, that is what rouled me. 478 00:26:21,080 --> 00:26:23,399 Speaker 1: Well what you want to know my name? But also 479 00:26:23,400 --> 00:26:27,320 Speaker 1: for me, he broke memories that my mom named me Peter. 480 00:26:28,040 --> 00:26:30,520 Speaker 1: So the idea that you could say Peter, I could 481 00:26:30,560 --> 00:26:35,280 Speaker 1: hear my mom on the other side, like, oh my child. 482 00:26:35,600 --> 00:26:39,280 Speaker 1: You know, we all travel. When you're in the airport 483 00:26:39,320 --> 00:26:41,760 Speaker 1: and hear someone yetting someone's name, you always look back. 484 00:26:41,800 --> 00:26:43,840 Speaker 1: Are they calling me or calling my son? Or your 485 00:26:43,840 --> 00:26:46,320 Speaker 1: son is not there? But because our names give us 486 00:26:46,320 --> 00:26:49,280 Speaker 1: the dinner who we are. When you don't have that, 487 00:26:49,400 --> 00:26:52,680 Speaker 1: you are less of a human being in a way. 488 00:26:54,000 --> 00:26:58,160 Speaker 4: But you've grown up to realize the kindness equeled abuse. 489 00:26:59,200 --> 00:27:02,000 Speaker 4: So felt good to hear your name. But you took 490 00:27:02,000 --> 00:27:03,160 Speaker 4: your apple and you ran off. 491 00:27:03,280 --> 00:27:06,119 Speaker 1: Well put his food down a few steps back, like 492 00:27:06,280 --> 00:27:08,760 Speaker 1: you're gonna harm me, you know, But before I could 493 00:27:08,840 --> 00:27:11,399 Speaker 1: go his say his food, you can take my food. 494 00:27:11,440 --> 00:27:13,919 Speaker 1: But still in that in my mind, you're gonna abuse me. 495 00:27:13,960 --> 00:27:16,159 Speaker 1: So I'm gonna put your food down and run the 496 00:27:16,160 --> 00:27:17,960 Speaker 1: other way. So as soon as I put it there, 497 00:27:17,960 --> 00:27:20,320 Speaker 1: I run. I didn't think of it to me, I 498 00:27:20,359 --> 00:27:22,600 Speaker 1: thought he's gonna abuse me, so I don't want to 499 00:27:22,640 --> 00:27:25,560 Speaker 1: know you. Next week I see him again, I was like, wait, 500 00:27:25,920 --> 00:27:29,040 Speaker 1: this is the same guy. So third week and fourth 501 00:27:29,040 --> 00:27:31,320 Speaker 1: week and every time he will say Peter that he 502 00:27:31,600 --> 00:27:36,439 Speaker 1: just remembered my name. So for me, in a week, 503 00:27:36,880 --> 00:27:40,680 Speaker 1: you had one day, one day where someone new your name. 504 00:27:42,560 --> 00:27:45,159 Speaker 1: That was the only day that I felt, oh, a 505 00:27:45,160 --> 00:27:49,520 Speaker 1: little human in me, like I'm human. He knew my name. 506 00:27:50,119 --> 00:27:52,040 Speaker 1: I didn't have to steal food. He will always give 507 00:27:52,080 --> 00:27:54,680 Speaker 1: me something to eat. So for me on Monday between 508 00:27:54,720 --> 00:27:57,359 Speaker 1: five and seven, I knew someone knows my name, and 509 00:27:57,400 --> 00:28:00,000 Speaker 1: he's gonna give me something to eat before I steal it. 510 00:28:00,320 --> 00:28:02,520 Speaker 1: And that's all it took. And so he fed me 511 00:28:02,560 --> 00:28:04,760 Speaker 1: for one and a half, you know, one and a half. 512 00:28:04,920 --> 00:28:09,320 Speaker 1: He will always come. And for some reason, it wasn't 513 00:28:09,359 --> 00:28:10,359 Speaker 1: the It ceased. 514 00:28:10,119 --> 00:28:12,800 Speaker 2: To be about food, but the idea. 515 00:28:12,520 --> 00:28:15,640 Speaker 1: That someone knows me, you know that someone knows me 516 00:28:16,440 --> 00:28:18,920 Speaker 1: is all that I was always looking for. On that 517 00:28:19,000 --> 00:28:21,760 Speaker 1: Monday when he came, so he fed me for one 518 00:28:21,800 --> 00:28:23,240 Speaker 1: and a half and one day he said, hey, Peter, 519 00:28:23,520 --> 00:28:25,200 Speaker 1: if he hadn't over to go to school, who did 520 00:28:25,200 --> 00:28:28,160 Speaker 1: you love to go to school? I laughed so hard 521 00:28:28,280 --> 00:28:31,359 Speaker 1: because I thought he was mocking me. You know, think 522 00:28:31,440 --> 00:28:34,040 Speaker 1: this way you live in the Swore, treated like a 523 00:28:34,080 --> 00:28:37,680 Speaker 1: strange animal, Like when do you hope to go to school? 524 00:28:38,080 --> 00:28:41,040 Speaker 1: You know, it's like me saying, hey, Bill, you know 525 00:28:41,080 --> 00:28:42,200 Speaker 1: they're sending people to the moon. 526 00:28:42,240 --> 00:28:42,960 Speaker 2: Would you like to go? 527 00:28:43,600 --> 00:28:45,600 Speaker 3: Actually would, but it's never going to happen. 528 00:28:45,720 --> 00:28:47,880 Speaker 1: Absolutely, But how many nights did you go to bed? 529 00:28:47,960 --> 00:28:50,920 Speaker 1: Saying I wish I could go to the moon? No, Well, 530 00:28:50,960 --> 00:28:53,560 Speaker 1: to a stric kid who lives in the Swore, it's 531 00:28:53,600 --> 00:28:56,360 Speaker 1: from garbage every day. Yeah, going to school, that's how 532 00:28:56,360 --> 00:29:00,200 Speaker 1: it felt. I Yeah, that's far far away. Another as 533 00:29:00,200 --> 00:29:03,640 Speaker 1: a falster parent, I think sometimes that's how we treat 534 00:29:03,640 --> 00:29:05,560 Speaker 1: our children when they come and you're like, you know, 535 00:29:05,720 --> 00:29:07,400 Speaker 1: I need you go to school and do your homework. 536 00:29:07,840 --> 00:29:12,880 Speaker 1: Sometimes that is like there's are ten fifty steps to 537 00:29:13,560 --> 00:29:15,920 Speaker 1: before they can know what that means, Like there are 538 00:29:15,960 --> 00:29:18,720 Speaker 1: things in between now and what are you asking me 539 00:29:20,160 --> 00:29:23,040 Speaker 1: that I it would take me a while to act 540 00:29:24,040 --> 00:29:26,400 Speaker 1: to believe that I can go to school, you know, 541 00:29:27,320 --> 00:29:29,160 Speaker 1: And so for me, I said no. 542 00:29:29,400 --> 00:29:29,560 Speaker 3: Like. 543 00:29:31,040 --> 00:29:35,080 Speaker 4: Another step would be for kids that are in bad 544 00:29:35,160 --> 00:29:38,640 Speaker 4: situations to believe they could go to college, or have 545 00:29:38,680 --> 00:29:42,480 Speaker 4: a job, or be a proper husband and father right, 546 00:29:42,960 --> 00:29:44,040 Speaker 4: or create a family. 547 00:29:44,920 --> 00:29:47,760 Speaker 3: Those levels back up to. 548 00:29:47,760 --> 00:29:52,840 Speaker 4: Your reality as a child, and things that seem so 549 00:29:53,480 --> 00:29:58,840 Speaker 4: ordinary and obvious to many of us are not even 550 00:29:59,000 --> 00:30:00,040 Speaker 4: dream a bull. 551 00:30:01,560 --> 00:30:03,800 Speaker 1: Yes, and you don't want to lie yourself. You don't 552 00:30:03,840 --> 00:30:07,000 Speaker 1: want to give yourself false hope. So for me, even 553 00:30:07,040 --> 00:30:09,640 Speaker 1: if I wanted to think about it, that was lying 554 00:30:09,680 --> 00:30:12,520 Speaker 1: to myself and putting my place, putting myself in a 555 00:30:12,560 --> 00:30:16,160 Speaker 1: place that I never wanted to be, but to be hopeful. 556 00:30:16,200 --> 00:30:18,800 Speaker 4: This khaki guy with glasses that gave you food for 557 00:30:18,840 --> 00:30:21,080 Speaker 4: all this time and knew your name. 558 00:30:21,680 --> 00:30:24,360 Speaker 2: Correct, But that's all that I could. I could go, 559 00:30:24,520 --> 00:30:25,760 Speaker 2: you know, And he earned it. 560 00:30:25,800 --> 00:30:28,560 Speaker 1: Remember, he earned that right to ask me would go 561 00:30:28,600 --> 00:30:30,960 Speaker 1: to school because he fed me for one and a half, 562 00:30:31,200 --> 00:30:33,280 Speaker 1: you know. So I said no. So next time, he says, 563 00:30:33,400 --> 00:30:36,400 Speaker 1: by the way, if you go to school, there'll be lunch, dinner, 564 00:30:36,400 --> 00:30:38,560 Speaker 1: and breakfast. I said, what time can we go? 565 00:30:38,680 --> 00:30:38,920 Speaker 3: Now? 566 00:30:39,560 --> 00:30:44,440 Speaker 1: When we go? Why? Because for the first time he 567 00:30:44,560 --> 00:30:47,640 Speaker 1: mentioned the one thing I needed the most, the one 568 00:30:47,680 --> 00:30:50,280 Speaker 1: thing I lived for. To me, I stole food every day. 569 00:30:50,320 --> 00:30:53,080 Speaker 1: It wasn't just like an earned money, no food. So 570 00:30:53,160 --> 00:30:58,120 Speaker 1: by him saying there's three meals in my entire life, 571 00:30:58,160 --> 00:31:01,240 Speaker 1: I had never had two meals a day, So three meals, 572 00:31:01,240 --> 00:31:04,200 Speaker 1: I was like, that can't be possible, Like are you sure? 573 00:31:04,720 --> 00:31:07,120 Speaker 1: That must like when we think of heaven, you know, 574 00:31:07,720 --> 00:31:10,040 Speaker 1: for us Americans we think of gold and I don't 575 00:31:10,040 --> 00:31:13,720 Speaker 1: know angels. For me, as a kid growing up in 576 00:31:13,720 --> 00:31:16,480 Speaker 1: the street, I knew food, there will be food. So 577 00:31:16,680 --> 00:31:19,400 Speaker 1: him saying three, yeah, that felt like heaven. So I 578 00:31:19,440 --> 00:31:22,600 Speaker 1: said I'll go. I'll go right now. But he fed 579 00:31:22,720 --> 00:31:24,880 Speaker 1: me for one and a half, so he had in 580 00:31:24,960 --> 00:31:27,640 Speaker 1: some way I trusted him that if he fed me 581 00:31:27,640 --> 00:31:29,320 Speaker 1: for one and a half and he says there's three, 582 00:31:29,840 --> 00:31:30,720 Speaker 1: maybe there's three. 583 00:31:31,040 --> 00:31:32,320 Speaker 2: So I went too. 584 00:31:32,960 --> 00:31:35,240 Speaker 1: But he did something really cool or something I did, 585 00:31:35,360 --> 00:31:38,840 Speaker 1: like he said, go uh clean, He said go go wash, 586 00:31:39,040 --> 00:31:41,800 Speaker 1: go wash, so I can take you to me washing. 587 00:31:41,840 --> 00:31:43,520 Speaker 1: So I had never taken a shower, so we always 588 00:31:43,560 --> 00:31:45,560 Speaker 1: wait for it to rain so he can take a shower. 589 00:31:45,600 --> 00:31:46,840 Speaker 2: I mean, so for him. 590 00:31:46,720 --> 00:31:48,960 Speaker 1: Say go take a shower, I feel like, Okay, now 591 00:31:49,000 --> 00:31:51,880 Speaker 1: you really don't understand my world, Like I don't. 592 00:31:51,680 --> 00:31:53,240 Speaker 2: Take showers, so forget it, you know. 593 00:31:54,080 --> 00:31:56,480 Speaker 1: So he's kind of like could not understand what's going 594 00:31:56,520 --> 00:31:57,200 Speaker 1: on in my brain. 595 00:31:57,280 --> 00:31:57,440 Speaker 3: You know. 596 00:31:57,760 --> 00:32:00,280 Speaker 1: Next time he comes, he says, hey, go clean up, 597 00:32:00,760 --> 00:32:01,760 Speaker 1: you know, clean up. 598 00:32:02,480 --> 00:32:03,480 Speaker 2: Anyone can clean up. 599 00:32:03,520 --> 00:32:05,720 Speaker 1: So I went to the store, I put a little hair, 600 00:32:05,800 --> 00:32:07,800 Speaker 1: you know, water in the hair, cleaned my eyes, and 601 00:32:07,880 --> 00:32:10,120 Speaker 1: came back and he'd given me clothes to wear. And 602 00:32:10,200 --> 00:32:13,920 Speaker 1: as soon as I entered his car, he opened every window, 603 00:32:14,120 --> 00:32:16,520 Speaker 1: you know. And that's when I realized, like, okay, I 604 00:32:16,520 --> 00:32:19,320 Speaker 1: don't think I smell good, you know. But that didn't 605 00:32:19,320 --> 00:32:21,640 Speaker 1: stop him, and so he take me to me to school. 606 00:32:21,800 --> 00:32:24,520 Speaker 1: So when we arrived, there was lunch, so I was like, 607 00:32:24,800 --> 00:32:27,400 Speaker 1: this guy could be real, you know, there'll be lying. 608 00:32:27,480 --> 00:32:30,640 Speaker 1: So then I waited for dinner. Then I came and 609 00:32:30,680 --> 00:32:32,880 Speaker 1: then it was breakfast. But when I came in, I 610 00:32:32,960 --> 00:32:35,520 Speaker 1: never slept on a mattress before, so they gave me 611 00:32:35,560 --> 00:32:37,720 Speaker 1: a bank bed and put me on top, you know, 612 00:32:37,960 --> 00:32:40,600 Speaker 1: and I was like, dude, no, I am not, you know, 613 00:32:41,080 --> 00:32:43,920 Speaker 1: So for me, I slept on the floor for the 614 00:32:44,080 --> 00:32:46,640 Speaker 1: few weeks, you know, because I had never slept on 615 00:32:46,640 --> 00:32:50,240 Speaker 1: a mattress. So I felt like I'll die, I'll fall off, 616 00:32:50,360 --> 00:32:53,720 Speaker 1: you know, But his wife stayed. I didn't stay because 617 00:32:53,800 --> 00:32:56,120 Speaker 1: I wanted to go to school. I didn't stay. You know. 618 00:32:56,200 --> 00:32:58,120 Speaker 1: He gave me my first pair of shoes at sixteen. 619 00:32:58,160 --> 00:33:01,760 Speaker 1: I never had a pair of shoes before. So what 620 00:33:01,920 --> 00:33:04,440 Speaker 1: made me say at school was I waited for the 621 00:33:04,480 --> 00:33:08,320 Speaker 1: next meal and the next meal. Now I began to 622 00:33:08,360 --> 00:33:11,040 Speaker 1: work for the next meal. So for example, for us 623 00:33:10,960 --> 00:33:12,520 Speaker 1: as street kids, if you look in my eye, that 624 00:33:12,600 --> 00:33:14,280 Speaker 1: means you want to fight, you know, So I'm going 625 00:33:14,360 --> 00:33:16,560 Speaker 1: to hit you as quickly as possible before you hit me. 626 00:33:17,000 --> 00:33:19,120 Speaker 1: But then I'll hold back saying, well, I'm not going 627 00:33:19,200 --> 00:33:22,760 Speaker 1: to hit you because dinner is coming, you know, dinner. 628 00:33:23,680 --> 00:33:25,880 Speaker 1: I'm not gonna do that. I'm gonna risk my dinner, 629 00:33:25,920 --> 00:33:28,400 Speaker 1: you know. Or the kids was a boarding school, so 630 00:33:28,520 --> 00:33:31,200 Speaker 1: the kids would grow classes For me, I will stay 631 00:33:31,280 --> 00:33:32,680 Speaker 1: gathering through their stuff. 632 00:33:32,720 --> 00:33:34,640 Speaker 2: So know how much am I gonna steal? 633 00:33:35,080 --> 00:33:37,800 Speaker 1: So as I'm trying to take it, but I will say, hmmm, 634 00:33:38,520 --> 00:33:41,360 Speaker 1: but lunch is coming, so I'll put it back. So 635 00:33:41,440 --> 00:33:44,680 Speaker 1: I wait for lunch. So with time, I realized I 636 00:33:44,720 --> 00:33:47,719 Speaker 1: can work this thing out, you know. So now I 637 00:33:47,720 --> 00:33:49,760 Speaker 1: put on my shoes, no, because I wanted to go 638 00:33:49,880 --> 00:33:52,880 Speaker 1: class because I knew if I put on shoes, they 639 00:33:52,880 --> 00:33:55,360 Speaker 1: will allow me to have the next dinner, you know. 640 00:33:55,800 --> 00:33:57,920 Speaker 1: So now I had to go to class because now 641 00:33:57,920 --> 00:34:00,360 Speaker 1: I was like, wait, if I go to class, they 642 00:34:00,360 --> 00:34:03,240 Speaker 1: will allow me to have lunch. So in so doing 643 00:34:04,120 --> 00:34:06,800 Speaker 1: for me because I when you've never had a meal, 644 00:34:06,840 --> 00:34:09,320 Speaker 1: you always feel that it's the next one is the 645 00:34:09,400 --> 00:34:11,799 Speaker 1: last one, you know, and you work for the next one. 646 00:34:11,880 --> 00:34:14,839 Speaker 1: And that's how I stayed in school over and over. 647 00:34:15,520 --> 00:34:18,960 Speaker 1: After three months, he took me to his home. So 648 00:34:19,520 --> 00:34:21,400 Speaker 1: once he took me to his home, also, I was 649 00:34:21,440 --> 00:34:24,200 Speaker 1: afraid because it was Sunday and they had dinner. You know, 650 00:34:24,280 --> 00:34:27,360 Speaker 1: there was lunch everywhere. So for me, I was like, no, 651 00:34:27,920 --> 00:34:30,160 Speaker 1: you're gonna hit me and you're gonna beat up your family. 652 00:34:30,280 --> 00:34:33,399 Speaker 1: So outside my food and still on the exit because 653 00:34:33,400 --> 00:34:36,120 Speaker 1: that's what my father did. So I thought every father 654 00:34:36,280 --> 00:34:39,040 Speaker 1: does that to their family. So I started the exit 655 00:34:39,080 --> 00:34:41,040 Speaker 1: door because I was waiting for him to beat up 656 00:34:41,080 --> 00:34:44,200 Speaker 1: his family, you know. So next week he invited me again. 657 00:34:44,280 --> 00:34:46,520 Speaker 1: After service, we went. You know, the thought I was like, 658 00:34:46,719 --> 00:34:48,480 Speaker 1: I think they are making it up. He would do 659 00:34:48,880 --> 00:34:52,319 Speaker 1: one day, he's gonna hurt somebody, you know. The fourth week, 660 00:34:52,400 --> 00:34:55,680 Speaker 1: they did something really special. So on the dining table, 661 00:34:55,840 --> 00:34:59,000 Speaker 1: they put one extra seat and they put my name 662 00:34:59,120 --> 00:35:19,359 Speaker 1: on the seat. Maybe that's the one action that made 663 00:35:19,400 --> 00:35:22,480 Speaker 1: my whole life change because I didn't know I was 664 00:35:22,520 --> 00:35:34,680 Speaker 1: worthy to sit on the tape. I didn't know it 665 00:35:34,719 --> 00:35:41,560 Speaker 1: was good enough. And so that was the first time 666 00:35:41,560 --> 00:35:45,080 Speaker 1: that I felt like, oh wow, I belonged to this family. 667 00:35:45,680 --> 00:35:47,120 Speaker 2: And so I sat on the table. 668 00:35:48,719 --> 00:35:51,839 Speaker 1: And now my whole life changed because I said, if 669 00:35:51,840 --> 00:35:53,359 Speaker 1: there is a man that I want to be, if 670 00:35:53,400 --> 00:35:56,520 Speaker 1: I want to be like him, if there's a family 671 00:35:56,560 --> 00:35:58,400 Speaker 1: that there is on the planet, I just want to 672 00:35:58,440 --> 00:36:01,399 Speaker 1: be like his family. Because I never saw him yelling 673 00:36:01,440 --> 00:36:03,560 Speaker 1: at his family. I never saw him beat them up. 674 00:36:04,160 --> 00:36:07,280 Speaker 1: I never saw what I thought every man every day does. 675 00:36:07,640 --> 00:36:10,319 Speaker 1: That he was the opposite. And so now not only 676 00:36:10,480 --> 00:36:12,800 Speaker 1: was I going to school, but now I had something 677 00:36:12,840 --> 00:36:15,759 Speaker 1: to dream for because I knew what that looks like. 678 00:36:15,920 --> 00:36:17,479 Speaker 2: Oh, this is what a. 679 00:36:17,400 --> 00:36:19,880 Speaker 1: Good family looks like. This is what a normal father 680 00:36:19,920 --> 00:36:23,160 Speaker 1: looks like, This is what a normal day to day 681 00:36:23,239 --> 00:36:25,920 Speaker 1: life looks like. And so now I went back to 682 00:36:25,960 --> 00:36:29,279 Speaker 1: school and I excelled because I had an example of 683 00:36:29,320 --> 00:36:30,239 Speaker 1: what I wanted to be. 684 00:36:30,560 --> 00:36:36,280 Speaker 4: You had dreams now because he showed to school besides food. Yes, 685 00:36:39,920 --> 00:36:43,120 Speaker 4: And that concludes Part one of my conversation with Peter 686 00:36:43,239 --> 00:36:46,279 Speaker 4: Mudabasi and you don't want to miss part two that's 687 00:36:46,320 --> 00:36:50,520 Speaker 4: now available to listen to. Together, guys, we can change 688 00:36:50,560 --> 00:36:53,400 Speaker 4: this country, but it starts with you. I'll see in 689 00:36:53,440 --> 00:36:53,839 Speaker 4: part two