WEBVTT - Your Sandwich Made Me Sick

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<v Speaker 1>Elvis Duran in the Morning show. Here's one of our

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<v Speaker 1>world famous phone pranks, Elvis Duran, Elvis Duran, phone.

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<v Speaker 2>Tap, all right, Danielle, what's it all about? All right?

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<v Speaker 2>And that emailed us and wanted us to phone tap

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<v Speaker 2>her husband, Ralph. He owns Colombo's Market, and she wants

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<v Speaker 2>us to call him and complain about the food. And

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<v Speaker 2>he takes a lot of pride in his Ralphie Boy Special,

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<v Speaker 2>So we're gonna tell him it sticks.

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<v Speaker 1>Here we go.

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<v Speaker 3>This is Ralph Speaker. I canna help you.

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<v Speaker 2>Yeah, Hi, Ralph, This is Michelle. I was in there

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<v Speaker 2>the other day and I ordered your Ralphie Boy Special.

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<v Speaker 3>Uh huh.

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<v Speaker 2>And the purshute tastes like crap because it tastes like

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<v Speaker 2>you got it out of the garbage dump. Serious, Yeah,

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<v Speaker 2>I'm serious. What I'm gonna call you and lie to you?

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<v Speaker 3>No, I just never had a complain about my brijute

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<v Speaker 3>that costs me eleven ninety five a pounds, So it's

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<v Speaker 3>it's hard to believe that Brae de Palma would taste

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<v Speaker 3>like like you're saying it does.

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<v Speaker 2>I don't care what it costs you. It costs me

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<v Speaker 2>a stomach ache.

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<v Speaker 3>I have to tell you, I haven't had one complain

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<v Speaker 3>about a ralpie. Boy. If you come in, I'll make

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<v Speaker 3>anything you'll want on the house.

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<v Speaker 2>Well, if you ate, would you try it again?

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<v Speaker 3>Excuse me?

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<v Speaker 2>If you ate, would you try it again?

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<v Speaker 3>Well, first of all, I would never call someplace and

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<v Speaker 3>tell them that they made.

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<v Speaker 2>Well, I'm sorry, but I'm being honest with you. I

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<v Speaker 2>just got to call you up. And I never had

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<v Speaker 2>such crap food before.

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<v Speaker 3>Well, I have to I apologize, but I have to

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<v Speaker 3>tell you I've never had one complaint about that sandwich.

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<v Speaker 2>Well, I had to take two days off work because

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<v Speaker 2>my stomach cart's.

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<v Speaker 3>So bad, you know, and it's a big piece of bredoot.

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<v Speaker 3>Other people are eating it. Nobody's called me to say

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<v Speaker 3>that they've gotten sick.

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<v Speaker 2>You're working in such a dump anyway. Maybe you don't

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<v Speaker 2>take care of the food and the place.

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<v Speaker 3>And I'm sorry now I have to Now I have

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<v Speaker 3>to take offence because I feed a lot of people

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<v Speaker 3>here every day, and nobody calls me and says that

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<v Speaker 3>my food except for.

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<v Speaker 2>You, you definitely got a bad proshoot.

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<v Speaker 3>Well, Michelle, I've been eating all week. I'm not sick.

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<v Speaker 2>I'm never eating in your piece of place again.

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<v Speaker 3>You know you want to call this a piece of place.

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<v Speaker 3>But I'm telling you, nobody's called me to tell me anything.

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<v Speaker 2>Don't get smart with me.

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<v Speaker 3>I feel like you're getting smart with me.

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<v Speaker 2>No, I'm just telling you how it is. I'm just

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<v Speaker 2>being honest.

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<v Speaker 3>Now you pissed me off. Oh please, now you pissed

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<v Speaker 3>me off. I want to make this right for you.

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<v Speaker 3>If you want to make it right, fine, Otherwise, don't

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<v Speaker 3>come here and eat no more.

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<v Speaker 2>I am coming here and eat no good.

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<v Speaker 3>Columbo's Market Ralph speaking, Yeah, Ralph.

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<v Speaker 2>What the hell? You can't talk to me like a man?

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<v Speaker 3>Trying to talk to you like a man. You're yelling

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<v Speaker 3>at make You're yelling at me, and I'm telling you

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<v Speaker 3>that my food is good. I don't get nobody sick.

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<v Speaker 3>So I don't know what you ate with your bridgoot

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<v Speaker 3>sandwich or what else you did? You know? And I'm

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<v Speaker 3>not trying to be naisty. I was trying to be

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<v Speaker 3>nice to you. You call my business a pieci and

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<v Speaker 3>that's not right. I wouldn't do that, no matter what

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<v Speaker 3>you did to me. I don't have a woman that

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<v Speaker 3>comes in every day and eat that sandwich and when

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<v Speaker 3>she comes in today, I'm going to ask her how

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<v Speaker 3>it was yesterday.

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<v Speaker 2>Maybe she's got a like a death wish or something.

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<v Speaker 3>No, maybe you do, okay, Because if and if I

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<v Speaker 3>had a complaint about someplace, I would go there and

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<v Speaker 3>I would allow that person the opportunity to make it

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<v Speaker 3>right for me.

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<v Speaker 2>If I go there, I wind up smacking you in

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<v Speaker 2>the face.

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<v Speaker 3>I wish you would come here and smack me in

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<v Speaker 3>the face. I really wish you would.

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<v Speaker 2>Oh please, what were you gonna hit me back?

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<v Speaker 3>No, I'm gonna stand there with my hands behind my

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<v Speaker 3>back and watch watch all the other people watch you

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<v Speaker 3>make a fool of yourself. I get it. I got

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<v Speaker 3>a sparkling inspection from the health department. They check all

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<v Speaker 3>my food. Everything I have here is good.

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<v Speaker 2>Maybe you pay them off.

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<v Speaker 3>Maybe maybe you know I don't have time for you.

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<v Speaker 3>Miss brijuts weigh thirty five pounds. You didn't eat thirty

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<v Speaker 3>five pounds of brillute. So somebody else ate that brijute

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<v Speaker 3>and didn't get sick for Joe, push.

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<v Speaker 2>Your preshot and the MUDs. How do I know the

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<v Speaker 2>Fresh Moods wasn't crap?

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<v Speaker 3>Because I make it every day? By hand.

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<v Speaker 2>Your hands are so great that they make good moods.

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<v Speaker 3>You do know what, I'm sweetie, don't call me back

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<v Speaker 3>anymore because we're gonna just keep hanging up on you.

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<v Speaker 2>Hey what you goofy?

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<v Speaker 3>All right? Them goofy and your Cinderella?

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<v Speaker 2>Yeah, I yeah. Who's the goofy looking person that works

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<v Speaker 2>in the store with you? That lady, you.

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<v Speaker 3>Really got a lot of balls staying out on the phone.

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<v Speaker 3>I really wish you'd come in and say it in person.

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<v Speaker 2>What are you gonna do? You're gonna hit a girl?

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<v Speaker 3>I just want to see who this jerk is that's

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<v Speaker 3>looking like that.

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<v Speaker 2>The jerk is talking, that's you.

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<v Speaker 3>All right, listen, have a nice day. Okay. I just

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<v Speaker 3>tasted the brijute to make sure you that I didn't

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<v Speaker 3>get sick.

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<v Speaker 2>Oh, now you're being as smartest.

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<v Speaker 3>Oh I did. I came up here, I tasted and

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<v Speaker 3>the model and they're both fine.

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<v Speaker 2>Uh huh, Well they taste fine. But wait till you're

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<v Speaker 2>in the bathroom later on watch you come here.

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<v Speaker 3>You can watch me go.

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<v Speaker 2>You make chicken palm? What you make chicken palm?

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<v Speaker 3>Yeah?

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<v Speaker 2>Because Elvis Durant in the Morning Show would really love

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<v Speaker 2>some chicken parm and.

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<v Speaker 3>Do you have somebody do this? I'll kill you. I

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<v Speaker 3>got to take freaking viagraph I mean DIANX for this.

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<v Speaker 3>Now you did this, I'm gonna kill my wife.

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<v Speaker 2>Now you've just been phone tapped.

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<v Speaker 3>Oh Jesus Christ, I'm shaking like a leaf over here.

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<v Speaker 3>She phone tapped me.

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<v Speaker 2>This is Danielle Monaro.

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<v Speaker 3>Are you married?

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<v Speaker 2>Yes?

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<v Speaker 1>I am.

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<v Speaker 3>He's I'm gonna be a looking for a new wife.

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<v Speaker 3>Aiftered Todight Elvis phone tap. This phone tab was pre

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<v Speaker 3>recorded permission granted by all.

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<v Speaker 1>Party Serious Elvis Duran phone tab lonely Elvis Duran in

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<v Speaker 1>the morning show. Here in New Elvis Duran phone Tap

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<v Speaker 1>weekday mornings