1
00:00:01,320 --> 00:00:04,600
Speaker 1: Hey, lady, is doctor dim here. If you like this

2
00:00:04,720 --> 00:00:07,240
Speaker 1: show and you want to make your own, let me

3
00:00:07,280 --> 00:00:10,840
Speaker 1: tell you about the free platform Anchor. It's a creation

4
00:00:11,000 --> 00:00:13,800
Speaker 1: tool that allows you to record and edit your podcast

5
00:00:13,920 --> 00:00:17,280
Speaker 1: right from your phone or computer. You can add songs

6
00:00:17,280 --> 00:00:21,000
Speaker 1: from Spotify and create any type of content that you

7
00:00:21,079 --> 00:00:24,400
Speaker 1: are looking for. Anchor will distribute it all for you

8
00:00:24,760 --> 00:00:28,440
Speaker 1: so it can be heard on Spotify, Apple Podcasts, and more.

9
00:00:29,160 --> 00:00:32,040
Speaker 1: Download the free Anchor app or go to anchor dot

10
00:00:32,159 --> 00:00:33,800
Speaker 1: fm to get started.

11
00:00:33,880 --> 00:00:36,400
Speaker 2: On this week's episode in her Space.

12
00:00:37,479 --> 00:00:40,320
Speaker 3: And say what have I done contribute to the life

13
00:00:40,320 --> 00:00:42,680
Speaker 3: that I'm living right now? And that's the only way

14
00:00:42,680 --> 00:00:44,559
Speaker 3: you're going to get out of that cycle, because if

15
00:00:44,600 --> 00:00:47,920
Speaker 3: you don't take accountability, you're going to find yourself having

16
00:00:47,960 --> 00:00:50,840
Speaker 3: the same dance again, just to a different song.

17
00:00:52,240 --> 00:00:55,880
Speaker 2: Today's episode is sure to provide you with motivation, inspiration,

18
00:00:56,280 --> 00:00:59,960
Speaker 2: or even a fresh perspective. If you have any AHA moments,

19
00:01:00,280 --> 00:01:03,400
Speaker 2: or if you feel comforted throughout the episode, Lady, please

20
00:01:03,480 --> 00:01:05,240
Speaker 2: leave us a review and tell us what we're doing

21
00:01:05,319 --> 00:01:07,680
Speaker 2: right so we can stay on track. Also, we release

22
00:01:07,720 --> 00:01:11,160
Speaker 2: episodes every Friday, so be sure to subscribe on iTunes

23
00:01:11,240 --> 00:01:13,760
Speaker 2: and visit her Space podcast dot com and enter your

24
00:01:13,760 --> 00:01:16,440
Speaker 2: email address to get updates about our live events and

25
00:01:16,560 --> 00:01:19,399
Speaker 2: all the new beginnings that we have for this year.

26
00:01:21,600 --> 00:01:25,720
Speaker 1: Welcome to her Space, a podcast dedicated to uplifting women

27
00:01:25,920 --> 00:01:31,000
Speaker 1: like you. We're your costs doctor Dominique Brussard, a college

28
00:01:31,000 --> 00:01:33,240
Speaker 1: professor and psychologist.

29
00:01:32,840 --> 00:01:37,480
Speaker 2: And Terry Lomax, a techie and motivational speaker. In a

30
00:01:37,520 --> 00:01:42,119
Speaker 2: world where black women are often misrepresented and misunderstood, please

31
00:01:42,200 --> 00:01:46,920
Speaker 2: join us as we initiate authentic conversations on everything from

32
00:01:46,920 --> 00:01:50,400
Speaker 2: fibroids to fake friends, and create a safe space where

33
00:01:50,400 --> 00:02:00,080
Speaker 2: black women can just be Hey, lady, it's Terry here

34
00:02:00,120 --> 00:02:02,880
Speaker 2: from the Herspace podcast and I have a question for you.

35
00:02:03,600 --> 00:02:06,480
Speaker 2: Do you want to start your own podcast? Have you

36
00:02:06,520 --> 00:02:09,000
Speaker 2: been thinking to yourself, you know what, I want to

37
00:02:09,040 --> 00:02:11,880
Speaker 2: start a podcast, but you just haven't taken the leap.

38
00:02:12,120 --> 00:02:15,520
Speaker 2: If that's you, I got you. I am hosting a

39
00:02:15,639 --> 00:02:19,000
Speaker 2: free podcasting masterclass where I'm going to teach you how

40
00:02:19,000 --> 00:02:21,720
Speaker 2: to create your own podcast from start to finish. I'll

41
00:02:21,760 --> 00:02:24,760
Speaker 2: teach you how to format your show and pitch great guests.

42
00:02:24,960 --> 00:02:27,120
Speaker 2: I'll teach you how to stand out in the crowd

43
00:02:27,160 --> 00:02:29,840
Speaker 2: of nearly one million podcasts. But I'm also going to

44
00:02:29,880 --> 00:02:32,200
Speaker 2: teach you how to get your mind right. Okay, We're

45
00:02:32,200 --> 00:02:35,280
Speaker 2: going to talk about how to overcome imposture syndrome and

46
00:02:35,320 --> 00:02:39,680
Speaker 2: how to deal with fear on your podcasting journey. So

47
00:02:39,800 --> 00:02:43,840
Speaker 2: even if you're not tech savvy, it's okay. This masterclass

48
00:02:43,919 --> 00:02:46,680
Speaker 2: is just for you. So visit Terrylomax dot com and

49
00:02:46,720 --> 00:02:48,600
Speaker 2: click on the pink link in the middle of your

50
00:02:48,600 --> 00:02:52,959
Speaker 2: screen and register for my free podcasting masterclass. Again, that's

51
00:02:53,080 --> 00:02:58,959
Speaker 2: Terrylomax dot com T E R R I l O

52
00:02:59,760 --> 00:03:02,920
Speaker 2: m ax dot com. I hope to see you.

53
00:03:02,919 --> 00:03:08,919
Speaker 4: There, lady. Today we have a very special guest in

54
00:03:08,960 --> 00:03:13,040
Speaker 4: her space. She's inspiring and smart as hell, So pull

55
00:03:13,080 --> 00:03:15,880
Speaker 4: out your pen and paper and have those tissues ready.

56
00:03:16,400 --> 00:03:19,639
Speaker 4: King Ashley Ann Jones is a self made six figure

57
00:03:19,760 --> 00:03:24,360
Speaker 4: per month top dollar earner, a self proclaimed business builder,

58
00:03:24,840 --> 00:03:29,440
Speaker 4: best selling author. Alongside Kim Coles, event designer, and more,

59
00:03:30,040 --> 00:03:32,880
Speaker 4: she teaches everyday people and business owners how to make

60
00:03:32,960 --> 00:03:36,960
Speaker 4: money with their basic skills, which includes grossing anywhere from

61
00:03:37,040 --> 00:03:41,320
Speaker 4: eight K to twelve k per month via live streaming

62
00:03:41,400 --> 00:03:44,760
Speaker 4: and social media. Recently, she taught a course on how

63
00:03:44,800 --> 00:03:48,880
Speaker 4: to make seventy five thousand dollars and three days, yes,

64
00:03:49,280 --> 00:03:53,760
Speaker 4: seventy five thousand dollars and three days with the receipts.

65
00:03:53,240 --> 00:03:57,040
Speaker 2: To prove it. King Ashley Ann, Welcome to her space.

66
00:03:58,120 --> 00:04:01,720
Speaker 3: Hi, thank you so much for the beautiful introduction.

67
00:04:02,840 --> 00:04:07,640
Speaker 1: So well, and so now we are going to dive

68
00:04:07,800 --> 00:04:12,040
Speaker 1: into our quote of the day. The past can hurt,

69
00:04:13,200 --> 00:04:16,200
Speaker 1: but the way I see it, you can either run

70
00:04:16,240 --> 00:04:21,080
Speaker 1: from it or learn from it. And that quote comes

71
00:04:21,080 --> 00:04:26,520
Speaker 1: to us from Rafiki in The Lion King. Now, Ashley,

72
00:04:27,200 --> 00:04:31,520
Speaker 1: when you hear that quote, the past can hurt, but

73
00:04:31,600 --> 00:04:33,920
Speaker 1: the way I see it, you can either run from

74
00:04:33,920 --> 00:04:39,000
Speaker 1: it or learn from it. When I think about that

75
00:04:39,200 --> 00:04:44,719
Speaker 1: intro that Terry gave us, and I think about what

76
00:04:45,640 --> 00:04:49,719
Speaker 1: I've seen and heard about you, it makes me curious

77
00:04:49,760 --> 00:04:51,760
Speaker 1: about Okay, like I need. I want to know more

78
00:04:51,760 --> 00:04:54,800
Speaker 1: about your past and I want to know what did

79
00:04:54,880 --> 00:04:58,280
Speaker 1: you learn from it to get to where you are

80
00:04:58,360 --> 00:04:58,880
Speaker 1: right now?

81
00:05:00,120 --> 00:05:02,880
Speaker 3: A loaded question. First of all, I think that that

82
00:05:03,040 --> 00:05:05,440
Speaker 3: is an accurate quote, and I really feel like that's

83
00:05:05,440 --> 00:05:11,120
Speaker 3: one of the keys to success. Accountability is everything, and

84
00:05:11,320 --> 00:05:15,360
Speaker 3: a lot of people that I see, they really struggle

85
00:05:15,440 --> 00:05:18,799
Speaker 3: with moving forward in their lives and really walking into

86
00:05:18,920 --> 00:05:23,080
Speaker 3: everything that you know, our highest creator really it is

87
00:05:23,120 --> 00:05:25,080
Speaker 3: that you believe in. You know, I believe in God

88
00:05:25,200 --> 00:05:28,400
Speaker 3: now from Omega, creative of the universe and everything they're in,

89
00:05:28,720 --> 00:05:30,800
Speaker 3: you know, giving them the end. That's why I believe in.

90
00:05:31,360 --> 00:05:34,919
Speaker 3: But in order to walk into everything that God really

91
00:05:35,000 --> 00:05:39,040
Speaker 3: has for you, you have to, you know, take accountability

92
00:05:39,120 --> 00:05:41,159
Speaker 3: for a lot of the things that you have done

93
00:05:41,839 --> 00:05:45,120
Speaker 3: or haven't done, or have allowed inside of your life.

94
00:05:45,520 --> 00:05:49,400
Speaker 3: And I see people get stuck all the time because

95
00:05:49,400 --> 00:05:51,839
Speaker 3: they would rather play the blame game, and they'd rather

96
00:05:51,880 --> 00:05:54,520
Speaker 3: be angry at other people and fall into victim mode

97
00:05:54,920 --> 00:05:58,799
Speaker 3: instead of really, you know, digging in and saying, Okay,

98
00:05:58,839 --> 00:06:01,560
Speaker 3: what can I do to change my situation? And I

99
00:06:01,600 --> 00:06:05,600
Speaker 3: have had a lot of stuff go down in my past,

100
00:06:05,839 --> 00:06:07,400
Speaker 3: you know, and I'm sure there will be some other

101
00:06:07,440 --> 00:06:09,640
Speaker 3: things that will happen in my future and I will

102
00:06:09,720 --> 00:06:12,160
Speaker 3: learn from those as well. I think one of the

103
00:06:12,200 --> 00:06:14,440
Speaker 3: biggest turnarounds for me in my life. I call this

104
00:06:14,480 --> 00:06:18,680
Speaker 3: like my bankruptcy period. And when I say everything was

105
00:06:18,720 --> 00:06:21,160
Speaker 3: all bad, everything was all bad. I think a lot

106
00:06:21,200 --> 00:06:23,480
Speaker 3: of times when people think about bankruptcy, they just think

107
00:06:23,480 --> 00:06:27,160
Speaker 3: about monetary and please believe, I had some monetary struggles

108
00:06:27,200 --> 00:06:30,760
Speaker 3: as well during this period, but I mean anything that

109
00:06:30,839 --> 00:06:33,640
Speaker 3: you could think of, you know, that was probably going

110
00:06:33,760 --> 00:06:36,400
Speaker 3: wrong or could go wrong. It was happening. I had

111
00:06:36,400 --> 00:06:39,080
Speaker 3: a business partner that had taken twenty five thousand dollars

112
00:06:39,120 --> 00:06:41,719
Speaker 3: from me, and at the time, I was not making

113
00:06:41,720 --> 00:06:43,960
Speaker 3: money the way I'm making right now, So like that

114
00:06:44,120 --> 00:06:47,520
Speaker 3: literally almost took me out. My ex husband at the time,

115
00:06:47,680 --> 00:06:52,760
Speaker 3: his mistress was like carassing me publicly and probably and

116
00:06:52,800 --> 00:06:56,159
Speaker 3: she was writing stuff on my Facebook business pages and

117
00:06:56,520 --> 00:06:59,200
Speaker 3: leaving me like negative reviews, you know, and calling me

118
00:06:59,360 --> 00:07:01,880
Speaker 3: and trolling me and stuff like that. And it was

119
00:07:01,920 --> 00:07:04,000
Speaker 3: crazy because it wasn't one of those things where at

120
00:07:04,040 --> 00:07:06,280
Speaker 3: the time my ex husbident and I were separated, we

121
00:07:06,279 --> 00:07:09,000
Speaker 3: were still like being much together, living in the same house,

122
00:07:09,120 --> 00:07:11,040
Speaker 3: you know what I'm saying. Like I wouldieve it, go

123
00:07:11,120 --> 00:07:13,880
Speaker 3: to work and he would go into his girlfriend. He'd

124
00:07:13,920 --> 00:07:15,440
Speaker 3: make it back home by the time I got home

125
00:07:15,480 --> 00:07:17,920
Speaker 3: from work, but dinner and act like everything was okay.

126
00:07:19,280 --> 00:07:23,840
Speaker 3: My life was depreciating at an alarming rate. My doctors

127
00:07:23,880 --> 00:07:25,680
Speaker 3: had told me I needed to be prepared to be

128
00:07:25,720 --> 00:07:27,920
Speaker 3: in a wheelchair for the rest of my life. That's

129
00:07:27,960 --> 00:07:30,160
Speaker 3: literally what they had told me. And then on top

130
00:07:30,240 --> 00:07:33,680
Speaker 3: of all of that, to my so called friends, you

131
00:07:33,720 --> 00:07:37,360
Speaker 3: know that I thought were my friends were definitely nowhere

132
00:07:37,480 --> 00:07:40,120
Speaker 3: there to be found, which was, you know, very hurtful

133
00:07:40,120 --> 00:07:42,480
Speaker 3: because it was several times but I was up with

134
00:07:42,520 --> 00:07:45,160
Speaker 3: them to two or three in the morning, helping them moves,

135
00:07:45,320 --> 00:07:47,800
Speaker 3: letting them borrow money, helping them get through their baby

136
00:07:47,840 --> 00:07:50,280
Speaker 3: daddy drama, and all that other kind of stuff. And

137
00:07:50,320 --> 00:07:52,560
Speaker 3: I was like, that's what I call it my bankruptcy period,

138
00:07:52,600 --> 00:07:56,840
Speaker 3: because like literally anything that you're thinking, you know what

139
00:07:56,880 --> 00:08:00,040
Speaker 3: I'm saying, that should be there. It was not a

140
00:08:00,080 --> 00:08:03,000
Speaker 3: lot of people would easily, you know, turn around to

141
00:08:03,080 --> 00:08:05,600
Speaker 3: be the victim and say, oh my god, you know

142
00:08:05,640 --> 00:08:07,880
Speaker 3: you were horrible to me, you were terrible, you did this,

143
00:08:08,000 --> 00:08:09,960
Speaker 3: you did that, blah blah blah blah blah. But I

144
00:08:10,000 --> 00:08:12,960
Speaker 3: had to come to Jesus meeting in that time and

145
00:08:13,000 --> 00:08:15,120
Speaker 3: it was like I hate my life, like I was.

146
00:08:15,320 --> 00:08:17,160
Speaker 3: I was in a lot of pain. I really, I know,

147
00:08:17,240 --> 00:08:19,520
Speaker 3: hated a strong word, but I really hated my life.

148
00:08:19,800 --> 00:08:23,440
Speaker 3: My life was trash, like straight up and down trash. Nothing.

149
00:08:23,480 --> 00:08:27,600
Speaker 3: My health was trash, my marriage was trash, my finances

150
00:08:27,600 --> 00:08:30,200
Speaker 3: are trash at the time right, my friendships are trash.

151
00:08:30,240 --> 00:08:32,439
Speaker 3: It was just trash. It was all around around that,

152
00:08:32,720 --> 00:08:35,120
Speaker 3: and my spiritual life at the time was trash too,

153
00:08:35,480 --> 00:08:38,800
Speaker 3: if I'm being honest with myself, and it was one

154
00:08:38,840 --> 00:08:41,439
Speaker 3: of those things. It was like I hate my life.

155
00:08:42,000 --> 00:08:44,720
Speaker 3: I was in an immense amount of pain. I regret

156
00:08:44,720 --> 00:08:47,320
Speaker 3: it now, but at the time I would literally pray

157
00:08:47,360 --> 00:08:49,360
Speaker 3: to God just to go to sleep and not with them.

158
00:08:49,920 --> 00:08:52,400
Speaker 3: I did not want to live. It was a really

159
00:08:52,440 --> 00:08:56,480
Speaker 3: difficult time and just one day, you know, I'm in

160
00:08:56,559 --> 00:08:59,080
Speaker 3: the house on the bathroom floor, you know, crying my

161
00:08:59,160 --> 00:09:02,160
Speaker 3: eyes out, hadn't even the days and my all distressed.

162
00:09:02,320 --> 00:09:05,600
Speaker 3: My husband, he was then my current husband at the time,

163
00:09:05,720 --> 00:09:08,600
Speaker 3: you know, is out with this chick. We had had

164
00:09:08,640 --> 00:09:11,400
Speaker 3: a big fight. We had gotten into like a physical altercation.

165
00:09:11,960 --> 00:09:14,319
Speaker 3: So I don't want to be like I definitely have

166
00:09:14,440 --> 00:09:17,079
Speaker 3: gone through, you know, about a domestic of use. It's

167
00:09:17,120 --> 00:09:20,120
Speaker 3: not my finest moment in my life, but it definitely happened.

168
00:09:20,360 --> 00:09:22,720
Speaker 3: And I'm not gonna be ashamed of anything, you know,

169
00:09:22,880 --> 00:09:25,920
Speaker 3: that that has happened in my life, or that I've

170
00:09:26,000 --> 00:09:28,480
Speaker 3: created or whatever is going on. But I'm not gonna

171
00:09:28,480 --> 00:09:30,240
Speaker 3: see him And like I was a wildflower too. He

172
00:09:30,320 --> 00:09:33,960
Speaker 3: hit me and I hit him back. Okay, like he

173
00:09:34,000 --> 00:09:36,240
Speaker 3: thought it was. I wasn't gonna take that. I wasn't

174
00:09:36,280 --> 00:09:40,680
Speaker 3: gonna take that whooping. Okay. But so I'm in the bathroom, Brian,

175
00:09:41,040 --> 00:09:43,360
Speaker 3: you know what I'm saying being a baby. Oh my God,

176
00:09:43,400 --> 00:09:45,439
Speaker 3: I can't believe this stepping to me. And it was

177
00:09:45,480 --> 00:09:48,360
Speaker 3: doing that blah blah blahdah and all this stuff, and

178
00:09:48,440 --> 00:09:50,240
Speaker 3: it was like at that time, it was like God

179
00:09:50,320 --> 00:09:52,920
Speaker 3: was like, this not you. It's not where I designed

180
00:09:52,960 --> 00:09:54,600
Speaker 3: you to be, and this is not the life I

181
00:09:54,679 --> 00:09:56,640
Speaker 3: designed you to live. And at the end of the day,

182
00:09:56,760 --> 00:09:59,040
Speaker 3: you know that that what you're doing right now is

183
00:09:59,080 --> 00:10:01,840
Speaker 3: not how you get mind. That's not how you connect

184
00:10:01,840 --> 00:10:03,640
Speaker 3: with me, that's not how you speak to me. And

185
00:10:03,920 --> 00:10:05,840
Speaker 3: I had to sit down and I had to have

186
00:10:06,080 --> 00:10:08,160
Speaker 3: to put my big girl fannies on, and I had

187
00:10:08,160 --> 00:10:10,520
Speaker 3: to have a come to Jesus meeting and say, Okay,

188
00:10:11,000 --> 00:10:13,840
Speaker 3: what have I done, what have I spoke? What have

189
00:10:13,920 --> 00:10:17,040
Speaker 3: I thought? How have I attributed to the current life

190
00:10:17,040 --> 00:10:20,160
Speaker 3: that I have right now? And that's a hard peel

191
00:10:20,240 --> 00:10:23,439
Speaker 3: for people to swallow because it can become very comfortable

192
00:10:23,840 --> 00:10:26,160
Speaker 3: being in the victim role. And I want to make

193
00:10:26,160 --> 00:10:29,640
Speaker 3: sure that I'm clear that I'm not saying that I

194
00:10:29,840 --> 00:10:33,640
Speaker 3: was responsible for any of those horrible things that people

195
00:10:33,679 --> 00:10:38,240
Speaker 3: did to me. You, taking accountability does not absolve people

196
00:10:38,640 --> 00:10:42,959
Speaker 3: of the trifling things that they have done. Right, But

197
00:10:43,800 --> 00:10:47,160
Speaker 3: it gets to a point, how long are you going

198
00:10:47,240 --> 00:10:50,720
Speaker 3: to be a prisoner to what someone has done to you?

199
00:10:51,840 --> 00:10:54,280
Speaker 3: To a point, it's not someone else is doing it

200
00:10:54,280 --> 00:10:56,720
Speaker 3: to you anymore. You're doing it to yourself, you know

201
00:10:56,720 --> 00:10:59,319
Speaker 3: what I'm saying. So and you have to start asking

202
00:10:59,360 --> 00:11:02,400
Speaker 3: yourself these questions, like why have you selected these people

203
00:11:02,400 --> 00:11:04,840
Speaker 3: to be in your life? Why are you giving people

204
00:11:04,960 --> 00:11:07,400
Speaker 3: your time and your energy that are unworthy of it?

205
00:11:07,920 --> 00:11:10,760
Speaker 3: What conversations did you escalate when you could have de

206
00:11:11,000 --> 00:11:15,120
Speaker 3: escalated something right? What missteps did you make? Who are

207
00:11:15,160 --> 00:11:17,880
Speaker 3: you in the presence of that you know in your

208
00:11:17,920 --> 00:11:20,000
Speaker 3: heart or hearts that God told you ain't even got

209
00:11:20,040 --> 00:11:24,400
Speaker 3: no business socializing with those people? What places been at

210
00:11:24,400 --> 00:11:26,280
Speaker 3: that you know you shouldn't have been at? Right? You

211
00:11:26,320 --> 00:11:30,359
Speaker 3: have to like, really like come to terms with yourself

212
00:11:30,400 --> 00:11:32,560
Speaker 3: and with your actions and with your speech and with

213
00:11:32,640 --> 00:11:34,680
Speaker 3: your thoughts, and you know what I mean, and say,

214
00:11:34,760 --> 00:11:37,360
Speaker 3: what have I done contribute to the life that I'm

215
00:11:37,400 --> 00:11:39,680
Speaker 3: living right now? And that's the only way you're going

216
00:11:39,760 --> 00:11:41,680
Speaker 3: to get out of that cycle, because if you don't

217
00:11:41,720 --> 00:11:45,200
Speaker 3: take accountability, you're going to find yourself having the same

218
00:11:45,320 --> 00:11:48,400
Speaker 3: dance again, just to a different sum, you know what

219
00:11:48,400 --> 00:11:50,520
Speaker 3: I mean. Like it's gonna be different partners, but you're

220
00:11:50,520 --> 00:11:52,440
Speaker 3: gonna be going through the same thing again. And so

221
00:11:52,920 --> 00:11:55,880
Speaker 3: that's one of the biggest things, Like when you're going

222
00:11:55,880 --> 00:11:58,079
Speaker 3: through that quote, it's the truth, Like there are those

223
00:11:58,160 --> 00:12:01,000
Speaker 3: of us that learn from what happened in our past,

224
00:12:01,040 --> 00:12:03,240
Speaker 3: and we're able to take it as energy and fire

225
00:12:03,320 --> 00:12:06,480
Speaker 3: to fuel us. And you know, it makes you sharper,

226
00:12:06,520 --> 00:12:08,679
Speaker 3: it gives you a greater discernment, and you don't make

227
00:12:08,720 --> 00:12:11,719
Speaker 3: those missteps anymore. And then though, there are people who

228
00:12:11,800 --> 00:12:14,480
Speaker 3: that becomes the story of their life and they are

229
00:12:14,520 --> 00:12:17,240
Speaker 3: crying about who hurt their feelings or broke their heart,

230
00:12:17,400 --> 00:12:20,120
Speaker 3: or who left them or you abuse them, or who

231
00:12:20,200 --> 00:12:22,800
Speaker 3: lied on them. In nineteen eighty five, it's like, build

232
00:12:22,800 --> 00:12:25,000
Speaker 3: a bridge and get over it, Okay, Like what have

233
00:12:25,120 --> 00:12:28,040
Speaker 3: you learned about the characteristics of those people? What have

234
00:12:28,120 --> 00:12:31,360
Speaker 3: you learned about yourself? You know, what have you learned

235
00:12:31,440 --> 00:12:37,680
Speaker 3: to do to better your future? Steps? So yeah, wow,

236
00:12:37,920 --> 00:12:40,160
Speaker 3: So literally you just preached the whole servant in a

237
00:12:40,160 --> 00:12:40,480
Speaker 3: couple of.

238
00:12:40,440 --> 00:12:43,360
Speaker 4: Minutes and in an interview right now, but I gotta

239
00:12:43,440 --> 00:12:46,520
Speaker 4: hear more. We gotta hear some more. Oh my goodness.

240
00:12:46,559 --> 00:12:48,360
Speaker 4: So it sounds like one of the biggest steps for

241
00:12:48,400 --> 00:12:52,120
Speaker 4: you was just like being still understanding, okay, where am I?

242
00:12:52,120 --> 00:12:52,920
Speaker 2: I don't like my.

243
00:12:52,920 --> 00:12:55,920
Speaker 4: Life, but then also taking accountability because, like you said,

244
00:12:55,960 --> 00:12:58,400
Speaker 4: it's a hard pill to swallow, but at some point,

245
00:12:58,440 --> 00:13:01,120
Speaker 4: we're playing the game that's being played, right, We're either

246
00:13:01,240 --> 00:13:04,640
Speaker 4: choosing to be there continue to interact with these people.

247
00:13:04,720 --> 00:13:07,360
Speaker 4: And so that was a huge step that you took

248
00:13:07,440 --> 00:13:10,000
Speaker 4: to realize, you know what, I don't need this, I

249
00:13:10,000 --> 00:13:13,320
Speaker 4: don't want this. So when you were going through all that,

250
00:13:13,360 --> 00:13:15,280
Speaker 4: I heard you in another interview say that you were,

251
00:13:15,600 --> 00:13:17,320
Speaker 4: you know, being abused by your ex husband. You were

252
00:13:17,320 --> 00:13:19,880
Speaker 4: also suicidal. One of your best friends betrayed you by

253
00:13:19,960 --> 00:13:21,760
Speaker 4: sleeping with your husband. My mouse was on the floor,

254
00:13:21,800 --> 00:13:24,800
Speaker 4: So I was like, what, So what were you doing

255
00:13:24,800 --> 00:13:27,079
Speaker 4: for your mental health during that time? Like how did

256
00:13:27,120 --> 00:13:28,720
Speaker 4: you actually be okay?

257
00:13:28,920 --> 00:13:29,040
Speaker 3: Like?

258
00:13:29,040 --> 00:13:29,920
Speaker 2: How were you okay?

259
00:13:30,800 --> 00:13:35,280
Speaker 3: So a lot of my being okay came from that

260
00:13:35,440 --> 00:13:39,160
Speaker 3: when I saw how concerned my parents were about me,

261
00:13:39,760 --> 00:13:43,120
Speaker 3: and my sister was about me. That made me feel bad.

262
00:13:43,200 --> 00:13:46,360
Speaker 3: I know that sounds that sounds really crazy, but it

263
00:13:46,440 --> 00:13:48,880
Speaker 3: made me guilty to see that I had put that

264
00:13:48,960 --> 00:13:52,280
Speaker 3: type of stress on them, right, the people that I

265
00:13:52,320 --> 00:13:55,160
Speaker 3: could depend on, the people that did love me. Now

266
00:13:55,360 --> 00:13:57,880
Speaker 3: you know I was doing something to hurt them. So

267
00:13:58,080 --> 00:14:00,319
Speaker 3: I did not like that. So that was one of

268
00:14:00,360 --> 00:14:02,800
Speaker 3: the things and I immediately prayed and I said, God,

269
00:14:02,840 --> 00:14:04,800
Speaker 3: if you help me get out of this, if you

270
00:14:04,800 --> 00:14:07,400
Speaker 3: can help me fix my mind, if you can help

271
00:14:07,400 --> 00:14:09,800
Speaker 3: me fix my spirit, I would do everything in my

272
00:14:09,880 --> 00:14:13,880
Speaker 3: power to never let myself be in this situation ever. Literally,

273
00:14:14,120 --> 00:14:17,640
Speaker 3: like I made a decision that instant that I wanted

274
00:14:17,679 --> 00:14:20,160
Speaker 3: to be happy. So then I got a piece of

275
00:14:20,200 --> 00:14:25,800
Speaker 3: paper like real life. I still have the notebook, and

276
00:14:25,880 --> 00:14:28,680
Speaker 3: I wrote down like what I want my life to

277
00:14:28,760 --> 00:14:32,320
Speaker 3: look like, what my life currently looks like, and I

278
00:14:32,400 --> 00:14:35,840
Speaker 3: literally put lines through anything that was currently in my

279
00:14:35,920 --> 00:14:39,160
Speaker 3: life that did not align with what I wanted my

280
00:14:39,200 --> 00:14:41,000
Speaker 3: life to look like. And I said, this is what

281
00:14:41,080 --> 00:14:43,600
Speaker 3: I have to give up. And I did not go

282
00:14:43,760 --> 00:14:46,600
Speaker 3: have these long drawn out conversations with people to tell

283
00:14:46,640 --> 00:14:48,920
Speaker 3: them this is why I'm not speaking to you or

284
00:14:50,360 --> 00:14:52,440
Speaker 3: I do none of that. I believe a lot of

285
00:14:52,480 --> 00:14:54,520
Speaker 3: that is silliness, you know what I'm saying, Like, if

286
00:14:54,560 --> 00:14:58,040
Speaker 3: you want to go like that's literally what I just left,

287
00:14:58,080 --> 00:15:01,040
Speaker 3: like even with my ex husband, like left like I

288
00:15:01,080 --> 00:15:03,680
Speaker 3: was like here the separation papers. I'm out of here

289
00:15:03,800 --> 00:15:06,920
Speaker 3: with those people that were my so called friends. Literally

290
00:15:06,960 --> 00:15:08,720
Speaker 3: the next time they called me, I just didn't pick

291
00:15:08,800 --> 00:15:11,320
Speaker 3: up a phone, like stressed straight out. And I know

292
00:15:11,400 --> 00:15:13,640
Speaker 3: some people probably going to have a problem with that.

293
00:15:14,160 --> 00:15:16,040
Speaker 3: I don't care. You know, it was a matter of

294
00:15:16,080 --> 00:15:17,920
Speaker 3: life or death for me at that time, and for

295
00:15:18,000 --> 00:15:19,840
Speaker 3: a lot of people that are listening, it's a matter

296
00:15:19,880 --> 00:15:22,200
Speaker 3: of life and death for some of y'all. Like, you

297
00:15:22,240 --> 00:15:26,400
Speaker 3: don't owe these people an explanation, especially at the end

298
00:15:26,440 --> 00:15:28,960
Speaker 3: of the day if they haven't been there, you know

299
00:15:29,000 --> 00:15:32,880
Speaker 3: what I'm saying, truly to support you, develop you or

300
00:15:32,920 --> 00:15:35,880
Speaker 3: help you grow in some capacity if they if it

301
00:15:35,920 --> 00:15:39,880
Speaker 3: hasn't been a mutually beneficial relationship, you don't owe anything

302
00:15:40,000 --> 00:15:41,920
Speaker 3: to that, because that's how a lot of people get

303
00:15:41,960 --> 00:15:45,000
Speaker 3: caught back up. They try and have these conversations and

304
00:15:45,160 --> 00:15:47,720
Speaker 3: meetings and well, we can still be friends and I'll

305
00:15:47,760 --> 00:15:50,440
Speaker 3: hang out with them sometimes, like no cut it off,

306
00:15:50,560 --> 00:15:53,000
Speaker 3: Like people try and make it a whole complicated process.

307
00:15:53,280 --> 00:15:59,040
Speaker 3: I literally just cut it off. Every day. I was like,

308
00:15:59,160 --> 00:16:01,640
Speaker 3: I'm going to read this praying as God. I say,

309
00:16:01,720 --> 00:16:03,560
Speaker 3: you know what I'm going to face today, you know

310
00:16:03,600 --> 00:16:05,680
Speaker 3: what I have to go through. Send me a work

311
00:16:05,880 --> 00:16:07,600
Speaker 3: is gonna get me through the day. And I would

312
00:16:07,640 --> 00:16:09,920
Speaker 3: let my Bible if I opened to wherever, if we'

313
00:16:10,000 --> 00:16:12,000
Speaker 3: open to And that was what I held on to

314
00:16:12,240 --> 00:16:13,960
Speaker 3: for that day. I appreciate that.

315
00:16:14,080 --> 00:16:18,200
Speaker 1: I think that it's about identifying what is going to

316
00:16:18,280 --> 00:16:20,440
Speaker 1: work for you, right, because you said, like I heard

317
00:16:20,480 --> 00:16:22,200
Speaker 1: what you said about you know, some people might not

318
00:16:22,440 --> 00:16:26,320
Speaker 1: like that about this idea of just cutting everybody off,

319
00:16:26,600 --> 00:16:29,320
Speaker 1: and I think you're right. I think that when we're

320
00:16:29,360 --> 00:16:32,520
Speaker 1: going through something, that's part of one of our lessons

321
00:16:32,640 --> 00:16:36,120
Speaker 1: is figuring out what works for us. So for some

322
00:16:36,280 --> 00:16:38,360
Speaker 1: people it may be that they need to have that

323
00:16:38,440 --> 00:16:41,320
Speaker 1: final conversation to kind of so they can be at peace.

324
00:16:42,160 --> 00:16:45,200
Speaker 1: But it sounds like what you're saying, for you, the

325
00:16:45,240 --> 00:16:48,600
Speaker 1: conversation wasn't needed. You knew you were done. This is

326
00:16:48,600 --> 00:16:51,000
Speaker 1: what needed to happen for you to be at peace,

327
00:16:51,120 --> 00:16:54,320
Speaker 1: to work towards your happiness, and so you stood firming

328
00:16:54,400 --> 00:16:56,400
Speaker 1: it and you did it. And I appreciate that, because

329
00:16:56,400 --> 00:17:01,920
Speaker 1: I also recognize that being able to do that speaks

330
00:17:01,960 --> 00:17:06,919
Speaker 1: to your strength, because that like truly saying, I'm not

331
00:17:07,240 --> 00:17:10,639
Speaker 1: giving into this anymore. Like you said, that's where a

332
00:17:10,680 --> 00:17:14,200
Speaker 1: lot of people get caught up because it takes an

333
00:17:14,200 --> 00:17:16,919
Speaker 1: incredible amount of strength to walk away from that.

334
00:17:17,240 --> 00:17:19,560
Speaker 3: Now, I don't know if it takes so much strength,

335
00:17:19,600 --> 00:17:22,040
Speaker 3: if it just takes you being tired, you know what

336
00:17:22,040 --> 00:17:24,919
Speaker 3: I'm saying, Like, I can't look back if that I

337
00:17:24,920 --> 00:17:28,600
Speaker 3: feel like I'm strong now, but back then I can't.

338
00:17:29,200 --> 00:17:30,800
Speaker 3: And it could have been, it could have been some

339
00:17:30,960 --> 00:17:34,240
Speaker 3: level of strength, but I can't honestly say like at

340
00:17:34,280 --> 00:17:36,719
Speaker 3: that point in time I had tapped into my power.

341
00:17:37,000 --> 00:17:39,119
Speaker 3: It was the beginning of me tapping into my power

342
00:17:39,240 --> 00:17:42,199
Speaker 3: for sure, But during that time it was just like

343
00:17:42,359 --> 00:17:46,680
Speaker 3: I got tired. It was literally just thinking, this is

344
00:17:46,720 --> 00:17:49,159
Speaker 3: the life that I want to live. Are any of

345
00:17:49,200 --> 00:17:52,639
Speaker 3: the things I'm currently doing helping me get towards the

346
00:17:52,680 --> 00:17:56,200
Speaker 3: life I want to live? Are any of these conversations

347
00:17:56,280 --> 00:17:58,640
Speaker 3: or any of these actions, or any of these places,

348
00:17:58,680 --> 00:18:01,280
Speaker 3: Are any of this serving me in the capacity to

349
00:18:01,320 --> 00:18:03,000
Speaker 3: help me create the life that I want to live?

350
00:18:03,280 --> 00:18:05,439
Speaker 3: And if the answer was no, it was like, fine,

351
00:18:05,480 --> 00:18:09,359
Speaker 3: it's got to go. So I know for some people

352
00:18:09,400 --> 00:18:12,560
Speaker 3: that's extreme. But then like when you look at a

353
00:18:12,600 --> 00:18:15,919
Speaker 3: lot of the people who live lives that are aspirational

354
00:18:15,960 --> 00:18:19,080
Speaker 3: type lives right or what people or what society would

355
00:18:19,080 --> 00:18:21,679
Speaker 3: deem as successful, a lot of us are willing to

356
00:18:21,800 --> 00:18:26,080
Speaker 3: take extreme steps. We're willing to take extreme measures, and

357
00:18:26,119 --> 00:18:29,760
Speaker 3: that's part of the reason we're able to experience the success.

358
00:18:29,920 --> 00:18:32,159
Speaker 3: I have the freedom and the peace that other people

359
00:18:32,200 --> 00:18:35,439
Speaker 3: wish that they had. I talked to thousands of small

360
00:18:35,480 --> 00:18:38,560
Speaker 3: business owners and entrepreneurs every single week at this point

361
00:18:38,560 --> 00:18:41,720
Speaker 3: in my career, and there's a common thread, like I

362
00:18:41,720 --> 00:18:44,080
Speaker 3: can click. I was talking about it. They're my livestream

363
00:18:44,080 --> 00:18:46,320
Speaker 3: today and I was telling people I can like literally

364
00:18:46,359 --> 00:18:49,040
Speaker 3: identify within sixty seconds of a person that's going to

365
00:18:49,119 --> 00:18:52,200
Speaker 3: succeed and have a tremendous amount of success and somebody

366
00:18:52,800 --> 00:18:56,280
Speaker 3: running around in circles. And it's because it's a mindset thing.

367
00:18:56,359 --> 00:18:58,439
Speaker 3: It's I can have to have that readiness and that

368
00:18:58,640 --> 00:19:01,560
Speaker 3: desire to be willing to make the shift. And the

369
00:19:01,600 --> 00:19:06,359
Speaker 3: reality is most of us will not let go of

370
00:19:06,440 --> 00:19:08,800
Speaker 3: what is not serving us. We will hold on to

371
00:19:08,960 --> 00:19:11,919
Speaker 3: things that no longer service us. We will hold on

372
00:19:11,960 --> 00:19:14,840
Speaker 3: to things that hurt us. We will hold on to,

373
00:19:15,280 --> 00:19:19,520
Speaker 3: you know, terrible experiences and replay them over and over

374
00:19:19,520 --> 00:19:21,639
Speaker 3: in our minds. We will hold on to all of

375
00:19:21,680 --> 00:19:25,760
Speaker 3: these super hurtful things instead of letting go, so that

376
00:19:25,800 --> 00:19:28,880
Speaker 3: way you can make room to receive what is new

377
00:19:29,480 --> 00:19:32,840
Speaker 3: and the truth be told. Those things that are holding

378
00:19:32,880 --> 00:19:36,199
Speaker 3: you down, that extra weight, you're not going to be

379
00:19:36,240 --> 00:19:40,560
Speaker 3: able to carry that and perform for your future, if

380
00:19:40,600 --> 00:19:42,879
Speaker 3: that makes sense. You have to go through the period

381
00:19:42,920 --> 00:19:46,600
Speaker 3: where certain things are shed and where certain things are

382
00:19:46,720 --> 00:19:49,719
Speaker 3: activated inside of you so that you can move forward

383
00:19:50,240 --> 00:19:53,359
Speaker 3: and really get what God has for you. And a

384
00:19:53,400 --> 00:19:55,679
Speaker 3: lot of it. We try and blame other people, but

385
00:19:55,760 --> 00:19:58,520
Speaker 3: it's really us. It's ourselves. We're standing in the way

386
00:19:58,560 --> 00:20:02,320
Speaker 3: of our blessings. We're keeping our self forgetting everything that

387
00:20:02,359 --> 00:20:04,320
Speaker 3: we want to have. And you can get everything that

388
00:20:04,400 --> 00:20:07,280
Speaker 3: you want to have without being ugly, without being nasty,

389
00:20:07,760 --> 00:20:11,439
Speaker 3: without you know, being a backfighter, without doing illegal activities.

390
00:20:11,480 --> 00:20:14,720
Speaker 3: You can completely have integrity, be as happy as a plan,

391
00:20:14,840 --> 00:20:18,280
Speaker 3: and get everything that you want in life if you

392
00:20:18,400 --> 00:20:22,800
Speaker 3: will practice accountability. In shaking and bacon, Okay, you got

393
00:20:22,880 --> 00:20:24,879
Speaker 3: you got to shake and bake. Sometimes you got to

394
00:20:24,960 --> 00:20:26,840
Speaker 3: move and groove. Okay, you got to drop a shoulder

395
00:20:26,880 --> 00:20:29,280
Speaker 3: on somebody, get them with a turn. Those that do

396
00:20:29,320 --> 00:20:33,680
Speaker 3: when they face honey and keep on walking. It's so powerful.

397
00:20:33,760 --> 00:20:34,280
Speaker 3: I love it.

398
00:20:34,359 --> 00:20:35,000
Speaker 2: I love it.

399
00:20:35,000 --> 00:20:38,920
Speaker 4: It's so powerful because everybody can't go and everything can go.

400
00:20:39,240 --> 00:20:41,480
Speaker 4: And I think about, like, oh my gosh, I know

401
00:20:41,960 --> 00:20:44,240
Speaker 4: me and Dom and so many other people are so

402
00:20:44,280 --> 00:20:47,280
Speaker 4: grateful that God didn't answer your prayer for you to

403
00:20:47,280 --> 00:20:49,959
Speaker 4: not wake up right because you've impacted so many people

404
00:20:50,359 --> 00:20:53,160
Speaker 4: on your journey after that point. And I think about

405
00:20:53,160 --> 00:20:54,720
Speaker 4: what you've been able to do with your business and

406
00:20:54,760 --> 00:20:56,879
Speaker 4: you starting your business at twenty one and then just

407
00:20:56,960 --> 00:20:59,439
Speaker 4: kind of failing forward, and I kind of want to

408
00:20:59,480 --> 00:21:03,440
Speaker 4: dive into to, you know, the challenges that you struggled

409
00:21:03,480 --> 00:21:05,560
Speaker 4: with when you first started your business, because we want

410
00:21:05,560 --> 00:21:08,399
Speaker 4: to dive into the you know, getting results in business

411
00:21:08,400 --> 00:21:10,439
Speaker 4: and monetizing. But what were some of the challenges that

412
00:21:10,480 --> 00:21:12,639
Speaker 4: you faced in the beginning, because I know that a

413
00:21:12,680 --> 00:21:15,240
Speaker 4: lot of women listening may be faced with those challenges

414
00:21:15,240 --> 00:21:16,399
Speaker 4: in their business right now.

415
00:21:17,359 --> 00:21:21,280
Speaker 3: Yeah, one of my biggest challenges was time. I had

416
00:21:21,359 --> 00:21:25,399
Speaker 3: a big struggle with time management and balancing my time,

417
00:21:26,119 --> 00:21:31,600
Speaker 3: just really being a workaholic. To my detriment, and sometimes

418
00:21:31,640 --> 00:21:34,879
Speaker 3: being so busy that you can't even get another opportunity.

419
00:21:35,440 --> 00:21:37,720
Speaker 3: And then the next biggest challenge I would say that

420
00:21:37,760 --> 00:21:40,480
Speaker 3: I had was my mindset at the time. Back then,

421
00:21:40,720 --> 00:21:43,399
Speaker 3: I still was in the mind of I have to

422
00:21:43,400 --> 00:21:46,600
Speaker 3: do everything on my own, and I kept telling myself,

423
00:21:46,680 --> 00:21:49,679
Speaker 3: I can't afford a team, I can't afford help, I

424
00:21:49,720 --> 00:21:53,360
Speaker 3: can't afford to outsource, when the reality was I really

425
00:21:53,400 --> 00:21:57,639
Speaker 3: couldn't afford not to write because those were investments. And

426
00:21:57,680 --> 00:22:01,359
Speaker 3: so once you start using different software and programs and

427
00:22:01,440 --> 00:22:04,639
Speaker 3: you get a VA or maybe a team member, or

428
00:22:05,040 --> 00:22:08,040
Speaker 3: you pay for a membership to something, all of a sudden,

429
00:22:08,080 --> 00:22:10,679
Speaker 3: those things become investments and they're actually going to make

430
00:22:10,720 --> 00:22:13,760
Speaker 3: you money back. So that was the issue. And then

431
00:22:14,119 --> 00:22:16,919
Speaker 3: also being willing to charge my work. I didn't have

432
00:22:16,960 --> 00:22:20,080
Speaker 3: the confidence to quote my prices, and so what I

433
00:22:20,200 --> 00:22:22,320
Speaker 3: found out that I was doing is I was like

434
00:22:22,400 --> 00:22:25,399
Speaker 3: literally paying to be in business, which was trash. You

435
00:22:25,440 --> 00:22:28,720
Speaker 3: know what I'm saying. Because you're making money, you know,

436
00:22:28,800 --> 00:22:31,560
Speaker 3: so you have enough cash flow to pay your bills,

437
00:22:31,800 --> 00:22:33,639
Speaker 3: but when you really go back and look at how

438
00:22:33,720 --> 00:22:36,199
Speaker 3: much money you spent, and then you're going look at

439
00:22:36,240 --> 00:22:38,639
Speaker 3: the time that you spent that you haven't even compensated

440
00:22:38,680 --> 00:22:42,840
Speaker 3: yourself for. It was like holy smoke. So after being

441
00:22:42,960 --> 00:22:45,480
Speaker 3: in the hole, you know and making making a negative

442
00:22:45,600 --> 00:22:49,440
Speaker 3: thirty thousand or negative forty thousand dollars, that would get

443
00:22:49,440 --> 00:22:52,840
Speaker 3: your mind right and you'll be like, oh no, we

444
00:22:52,880 --> 00:22:55,920
Speaker 3: can't keep doing this. So that was a bigger thing

445
00:22:55,960 --> 00:22:58,640
Speaker 3: for me, was like getting the companies to quote my prices.

446
00:22:58,640 --> 00:23:01,640
Speaker 3: And I was able to overcome that by learning how

447
00:23:01,640 --> 00:23:05,920
Speaker 3: to educate and inform my clients. So if I realized

448
00:23:06,000 --> 00:23:08,800
Speaker 3: once I took a client through the process and explained

449
00:23:08,840 --> 00:23:12,000
Speaker 3: to them, you know what all was included inside of

450
00:23:12,040 --> 00:23:15,280
Speaker 3: the invoys, the labor hours, the amount of team members

451
00:23:15,280 --> 00:23:18,120
Speaker 3: it took, the amount of research. You know that there

452
00:23:18,160 --> 00:23:21,480
Speaker 3: were thirty to forty three vendors for every event, you know,

453
00:23:21,600 --> 00:23:23,720
Speaker 3: breaking down, these are all the things that have to

454
00:23:23,760 --> 00:23:26,160
Speaker 3: be done, and then I'm also doing all of these

455
00:23:26,160 --> 00:23:29,320
Speaker 3: things over on this side to create options for you,

456
00:23:29,400 --> 00:23:32,120
Speaker 3: and you know, just being able to like really explain

457
00:23:32,160 --> 00:23:35,080
Speaker 3: to them, breaking down to them like the average crisis

458
00:23:35,359 --> 00:23:38,920
Speaker 3: of you know, what a wedding or what a promotional

459
00:23:38,920 --> 00:23:41,359
Speaker 3: event would cause it a particular type of a venue

460
00:23:41,480 --> 00:23:44,720
Speaker 3: and what the taxes are, and what the gratuity fees are,

461
00:23:44,800 --> 00:23:46,520
Speaker 3: and you know what your bottom line is really going

462
00:23:46,600 --> 00:23:48,840
Speaker 3: to be. And then those clients going and double checking

463
00:23:48,880 --> 00:23:51,640
Speaker 3: in and seeing I was right after that no one

464
00:23:51,720 --> 00:23:54,400
Speaker 3: had a problem paying my price. So I learned how

465
00:23:54,400 --> 00:23:57,879
Speaker 3: to become better at informing my client of what my

466
00:23:58,000 --> 00:24:03,800
Speaker 3: services really entailed, benefits were of utilizing my services were,

467
00:24:04,240 --> 00:24:07,560
Speaker 3: and so therefore, this is what the price is, and

468
00:24:07,600 --> 00:24:10,800
Speaker 3: you're not paying you know, just me. You're paying for

469
00:24:11,160 --> 00:24:13,800
Speaker 3: the experience, you're paying for the labor, you're paying for

470
00:24:13,880 --> 00:24:16,199
Speaker 3: the product, you're paying, you know, for the rentals, are

471
00:24:16,400 --> 00:24:19,480
Speaker 3: really getting them to understand what was going on. And

472
00:24:19,560 --> 00:24:21,359
Speaker 3: after that I was bouching.

473
00:24:23,960 --> 00:24:26,639
Speaker 1: I appreciate that. The thing that I appreciate most about

474
00:24:26,640 --> 00:24:31,000
Speaker 1: what you shared is that acknowledging your worth right and

475
00:24:31,560 --> 00:24:37,600
Speaker 1: asking for your worth. A lot of us, particularly black women,

476
00:24:38,840 --> 00:24:45,160
Speaker 1: have a hard time with really asking for our work,

477
00:24:45,800 --> 00:24:48,720
Speaker 1: but also before even getting to the point of asking

478
00:24:48,760 --> 00:24:53,520
Speaker 1: for our worth, knowing for ourselves what we are worth.

479
00:24:54,240 --> 00:24:56,840
Speaker 1: And so I want to kind of go back a

480
00:24:56,880 --> 00:24:59,960
Speaker 1: little bit and drill down a little bit deeper, because

481
00:25:00,240 --> 00:25:03,080
Speaker 1: you said that like at one point you were like

482
00:25:03,760 --> 00:25:07,680
Speaker 1: negative thirty thousand dollars negative forty thousand dollars, and then

483
00:25:07,880 --> 00:25:10,919
Speaker 1: you started to realize, okay, I need to ask for

484
00:25:11,000 --> 00:25:15,600
Speaker 1: what I'm working. How did you get from identifying, okay,

485
00:25:16,000 --> 00:25:20,440
Speaker 1: I'm in the negative to knowing, like exactly identifying how

486
00:25:20,600 --> 00:25:21,800
Speaker 1: much you are working?

487
00:25:23,040 --> 00:25:31,840
Speaker 3: Daryl, I had to pay my bills. Really, the biggest

488
00:25:31,840 --> 00:25:36,119
Speaker 3: thing was tabulating how much I was spending at the

489
00:25:36,200 --> 00:25:39,679
Speaker 3: venus and with the labor, and for the rentals and

490
00:25:39,760 --> 00:25:42,680
Speaker 3: with the linen and with the cleaning and the upkeep.

491
00:25:43,080 --> 00:25:46,359
Speaker 3: So really looking at my expenses was the first step.

492
00:25:46,720 --> 00:25:50,080
Speaker 3: The second thing starting to tabulate the hours that I

493
00:25:50,160 --> 00:25:53,919
Speaker 3: was actually working for each client per week. So that

494
00:25:54,000 --> 00:25:57,040
Speaker 3: way I literally could say, oh, I spend forty hours

495
00:25:57,040 --> 00:26:00,600
Speaker 3: a month, you know, planning this or organizing is for you,

496
00:26:00,920 --> 00:26:04,120
Speaker 3: and this is what's happening during month, one month, two month, free,

497
00:26:04,160 --> 00:26:06,679
Speaker 3: you know, so and so forth. Because then once you

498
00:26:06,720 --> 00:26:08,760
Speaker 3: start looking at it, then you don't have a problem

499
00:26:09,080 --> 00:26:11,679
Speaker 3: asking for it. Right then, what I did is I

500
00:26:11,760 --> 00:26:14,520
Speaker 3: broke down because my Bay First company is an event

501
00:26:14,560 --> 00:26:17,480
Speaker 3: design and production company. I'm a luxury event design and

502
00:26:17,480 --> 00:26:21,200
Speaker 3: production company events fa Ashly and it's still operational right

503
00:26:21,200 --> 00:26:23,600
Speaker 3: now to this day. So when I looked at what

504
00:26:23,680 --> 00:26:27,000
Speaker 3: I was charging overall to plan someone's event, and I

505
00:26:27,040 --> 00:26:29,640
Speaker 3: looked at on average, I was spending anywhere from six

506
00:26:29,680 --> 00:26:32,200
Speaker 3: to twelve months working with each one of these clients.

507
00:26:32,400 --> 00:26:36,520
Speaker 3: When I divided that by the hours per month I

508
00:26:36,640 --> 00:26:39,240
Speaker 3: was I was working, it came up to like two

509
00:26:39,280 --> 00:26:43,400
Speaker 3: dollars and thirty eight cent I was, girl, you under

510
00:26:43,560 --> 00:26:48,639
Speaker 3: way under minimum? Way, wut that down? You know, to

511
00:26:48,760 --> 00:26:51,560
Speaker 3: a client and say like, this is what you're paying.

512
00:26:51,640 --> 00:26:54,360
Speaker 3: You know, this is the level of work. And then

513
00:26:54,560 --> 00:26:57,000
Speaker 3: also the next thing that helped me. And this is

514
00:26:57,040 --> 00:26:58,920
Speaker 3: going to be a tough decision for people to make,

515
00:26:58,920 --> 00:27:01,280
Speaker 3: but I teach my FIDS to all the time. I

516
00:27:01,320 --> 00:27:03,800
Speaker 3: was actually talking about this in my live stream today too.

517
00:27:04,359 --> 00:27:08,399
Speaker 3: You have to be able to identify what client you

518
00:27:08,480 --> 00:27:11,439
Speaker 3: are serving in the marketplace and get comfortable with the

519
00:27:11,440 --> 00:27:14,320
Speaker 3: fact that everyone is not your client. And a lot

520
00:27:14,359 --> 00:27:17,879
Speaker 3: of us struggle with trying to help everyone, trying to

521
00:27:17,960 --> 00:27:21,960
Speaker 3: service everyone. You cannot be everything to everyone. It's not

522
00:27:22,040 --> 00:27:24,520
Speaker 3: your job to be everything to everyone. I didn't want

523
00:27:24,520 --> 00:27:26,479
Speaker 3: to be on the Chipman circuit no more. So I

524
00:27:26,520 --> 00:27:29,840
Speaker 3: made a firm decision so if a client did not

525
00:27:30,000 --> 00:27:32,760
Speaker 3: have this minimum budget, I was not going to work

526
00:27:32,760 --> 00:27:35,000
Speaker 3: with them, period if that was not your minimum. But

527
00:27:35,400 --> 00:27:37,800
Speaker 3: I'm not taking you on. We're not having a consultation,

528
00:27:37,880 --> 00:27:40,000
Speaker 3: we're not going out for coffee, we're not going to tea,

529
00:27:40,400 --> 00:27:42,920
Speaker 3: none of that. You're not the client that I want

530
00:27:42,960 --> 00:27:47,840
Speaker 3: to service. And then also looking into the marketplace because

531
00:27:48,080 --> 00:27:52,200
Speaker 3: luxury event designers, any type of luxury vendor, honestly, they

532
00:27:52,280 --> 00:27:55,680
Speaker 3: circulate in a totally different place than somebody that's mid

533
00:27:55,800 --> 00:27:58,439
Speaker 3: range and somebody that's Chiplin Circuit. That's just the truth.

534
00:27:58,720 --> 00:28:03,000
Speaker 3: They're advertising in different places, they hang out at different events,

535
00:28:03,440 --> 00:28:07,480
Speaker 3: they have totally different supply chains and vendors, right, They're

536
00:28:07,480 --> 00:28:10,800
Speaker 3: a part of different organizations. So I started researching and

537
00:28:10,840 --> 00:28:14,119
Speaker 3: finding out with the type of audience like that I

538
00:28:14,160 --> 00:28:16,439
Speaker 3: wanted to reach, with the type of client that I

539
00:28:16,480 --> 00:28:18,560
Speaker 3: wanted to get in front of. I started looking and

540
00:28:18,600 --> 00:28:21,640
Speaker 3: seeing those people that were already servicing those clients. Where

541
00:28:21,680 --> 00:28:25,480
Speaker 3: are they advertising at? What online marketplaces are they subscribed to,

542
00:28:25,880 --> 00:28:29,320
Speaker 3: what services are they offering, what's going on with their packages?

543
00:28:29,600 --> 00:28:32,680
Speaker 3: But all do their packages intel? What type of price

544
00:28:32,720 --> 00:28:36,040
Speaker 3: points are general out here in the marketplace? Right? What

545
00:28:36,160 --> 00:28:38,560
Speaker 3: does the level of work look like? Okay, how can

546
00:28:38,600 --> 00:28:41,360
Speaker 3: I get my level of work up to that standard

547
00:28:41,600 --> 00:28:44,400
Speaker 3: so I could commit that price. So it was really

548
00:28:44,400 --> 00:28:47,640
Speaker 3: a multi step process, but in the long run, it

549
00:28:47,760 --> 00:28:50,600
Speaker 3: paid off. And I definitely encourage everyone to do the

550
00:28:50,640 --> 00:28:52,320
Speaker 3: same thing because at the end of the day, you're

551
00:28:52,360 --> 00:28:55,480
Speaker 3: running a business, so you know, the end goal of

552
00:28:55,520 --> 00:28:58,200
Speaker 3: a business is to have some profit. And like I said,

553
00:28:58,280 --> 00:29:02,840
Speaker 3: you gotta pay your bills. Okay, people aren't giving you

554
00:29:02,840 --> 00:29:05,040
Speaker 3: a pass on your bills because you have a good heart.

555
00:29:05,480 --> 00:29:08,200
Speaker 3: They're like, they're like, okay, that's great, we still mark.

556
00:29:09,000 --> 00:29:09,640
Speaker 1: I love that.

557
00:29:09,640 --> 00:29:10,720
Speaker 2: That is super helpful.

558
00:29:11,120 --> 00:29:14,080
Speaker 4: And I think about one actually, I want to say

559
00:29:14,240 --> 00:29:16,280
Speaker 4: I started following you maybe a couple of months ago.

560
00:29:16,360 --> 00:29:18,960
Speaker 4: I believe the six Figure Chick had posted about.

561
00:29:18,720 --> 00:29:20,000
Speaker 2: You, and I was like, let me go follow this

562
00:29:20,360 --> 00:29:22,400
Speaker 2: King Ashley in and so of course I enrolled in

563
00:29:22,440 --> 00:29:24,800
Speaker 2: one of your programs and you helped me get results

564
00:29:24,840 --> 00:29:27,040
Speaker 2: in my business and it was a game changer for me.

565
00:29:27,080 --> 00:29:31,080
Speaker 2: And so I want you to talk about the power of.

566
00:29:30,520 --> 00:29:33,120
Speaker 4: The free ninety nine. Could you talk a lot about

567
00:29:33,120 --> 00:29:35,280
Speaker 4: that in your programs and the trainings that we have.

568
00:29:35,440 --> 00:29:38,080
Speaker 4: So why is it so essential when it comes to

569
00:29:38,160 --> 00:29:39,640
Speaker 4: people getting results in their business?

570
00:29:39,640 --> 00:29:40,840
Speaker 2: The Free ninety nine.

571
00:29:41,040 --> 00:29:45,200
Speaker 3: Yeah, girl, I love some free ninety nine. Yeah, the

572
00:29:45,240 --> 00:29:47,600
Speaker 3: six figure chick, I love CC. She is one of

573
00:29:47,600 --> 00:29:49,920
Speaker 3: my clients. She makes me look good. A lot of

574
00:29:49,920 --> 00:29:54,480
Speaker 3: my clients make me look good like I'm your coach's

575
00:29:54,480 --> 00:29:59,360
Speaker 3: favorite coach. I'm like the woman baby. I try not

576
00:29:59,400 --> 00:30:00,600
Speaker 3: to get on the path. I have to trying to

577
00:30:00,680 --> 00:30:03,320
Speaker 3: name people because I forget that I have so many

578
00:30:03,360 --> 00:30:05,760
Speaker 3: clients that are out here killing it in these social

579
00:30:05,840 --> 00:30:09,760
Speaker 3: media streets, like it's crazy we were doing. I've actually,

580
00:30:10,040 --> 00:30:12,240
Speaker 3: as of today, I've helped eight thousand and three people

581
00:30:12,280 --> 00:30:15,760
Speaker 3: make money with their social media accounts, and five hundred

582
00:30:15,760 --> 00:30:18,240
Speaker 3: and eighty five of my clients have hit six figures

583
00:30:18,440 --> 00:30:20,360
Speaker 3: and one hundred and thirty eight of them have hit

584
00:30:20,400 --> 00:30:23,200
Speaker 3: a million in under a year. So and all of

585
00:30:23,240 --> 00:30:25,880
Speaker 3: them use the free ninety nine strategy, every single one

586
00:30:25,880 --> 00:30:31,120
Speaker 3: of them, because it works. Wow. Yeah, free ninety nine

587
00:30:31,320 --> 00:30:33,920
Speaker 3: leads to pay ninety nine. That's the first thing to

588
00:30:34,040 --> 00:30:37,560
Speaker 3: remember about it. And it's about being strategic with your

589
00:30:37,560 --> 00:30:39,720
Speaker 3: free ninety nine. So a lot of people they always

590
00:30:39,760 --> 00:30:41,800
Speaker 3: combat me and they go, oh my god, it doesn't right.

591
00:30:41,840 --> 00:30:44,000
Speaker 3: I got different staff and I ain't getting that gap.

592
00:30:44,160 --> 00:30:46,520
Speaker 3: Has other people that said myself and I'm like, girl,

593
00:30:46,560 --> 00:30:49,200
Speaker 3: you do it right. Okay. So, first of all, there

594
00:30:49,240 --> 00:30:51,440
Speaker 3: are only three types of people that you should be

595
00:30:51,480 --> 00:30:55,840
Speaker 3: doing free ninety nine forever period. Number one has to

596
00:30:55,880 --> 00:30:59,160
Speaker 3: be an influencer, and not just any type of I'm

597
00:30:59,200 --> 00:31:01,800
Speaker 3: not talking about a social media influencer. I mean a

598
00:31:01,880 --> 00:31:05,560
Speaker 3: real influencer just and I'm not knocking social media influencers,

599
00:31:05,600 --> 00:31:07,640
Speaker 3: but just because someone has a lot of followers, that

600
00:31:07,640 --> 00:31:10,480
Speaker 3: doesn't mean that they have influence. Okay. I'm talking about

601
00:31:10,520 --> 00:31:15,040
Speaker 3: people who have influence over people who need your products

602
00:31:15,040 --> 00:31:18,560
Speaker 3: and services, Okay, who will pay money for your products

603
00:31:18,560 --> 00:31:22,240
Speaker 3: and services. So they need to have influence over your

604
00:31:22,280 --> 00:31:25,760
Speaker 3: target audience or your idea audience. The second type of

605
00:31:25,760 --> 00:31:28,880
Speaker 3: person you want to do three ninety nine four is

606
00:31:28,960 --> 00:31:32,160
Speaker 3: someone who can actually afford the product and service, so

607
00:31:32,200 --> 00:31:34,560
Speaker 3: they have the potential to be a customer. So this

608
00:31:34,600 --> 00:31:36,760
Speaker 3: is who you want to give maybe like free trials,

609
00:31:36,840 --> 00:31:41,640
Speaker 3: to free consultations, discovery sessions, things like that, a free sample, right,

610
00:31:42,360 --> 00:31:44,560
Speaker 3: somebody that really can afford it and is going to

611
00:31:44,640 --> 00:31:46,760
Speaker 3: find the benefit in it. And then the third type

612
00:31:46,800 --> 00:31:48,920
Speaker 3: of person is a combination of the two. They're the

613
00:31:48,960 --> 00:31:51,680
Speaker 3: holy grail. They can become a customer, and they can

614
00:31:51,680 --> 00:31:54,360
Speaker 3: afford your products and services, and they also have influence

615
00:31:54,400 --> 00:31:56,960
Speaker 3: over our audience. Typically, those are the type of people

616
00:31:57,040 --> 00:31:59,400
Speaker 3: I would tell you do it for free for them forever,

617
00:31:59,480 --> 00:32:01,800
Speaker 3: as long as they are promoting and telling other people

618
00:32:01,880 --> 00:32:05,360
Speaker 3: about you forever, because you're going to get a huge

619
00:32:05,400 --> 00:32:07,719
Speaker 3: trade off of being able to pick up more customers

620
00:32:07,960 --> 00:32:12,520
Speaker 3: because their audience already knows them, likes them, and trusts them.

621
00:32:12,720 --> 00:32:15,840
Speaker 3: So when they give you an endorsement, their audience automatically

622
00:32:15,960 --> 00:32:17,680
Speaker 3: is going to say okay, you're okay, and they're going

623
00:32:17,720 --> 00:32:20,160
Speaker 3: to want to consume your products or services or whatever

624
00:32:20,200 --> 00:32:22,640
Speaker 3: your offer is. Whenever you do free ninety nine to

625
00:32:22,720 --> 00:32:25,080
Speaker 3: lead to pay ninety nine, you need to have some structure.

626
00:32:25,440 --> 00:32:27,640
Speaker 3: You need to have a certain percentage or a certain

627
00:32:27,680 --> 00:32:29,920
Speaker 3: stopping point. But you're free ninety nine, and you want

628
00:32:29,960 --> 00:32:31,800
Speaker 3: to make sure that your free ninety nine gives a

629
00:32:31,800 --> 00:32:35,280
Speaker 3: customer a result that it answers a question for them,

630
00:32:35,600 --> 00:32:38,200
Speaker 3: solves a problem, it gets them to some type of

631
00:32:38,240 --> 00:32:42,120
Speaker 3: desired state. Typically, whatever the hurdles are that someone's going

632
00:32:42,200 --> 00:32:45,200
Speaker 3: to experience before they get to your product or to

633
00:32:45,280 --> 00:32:48,200
Speaker 3: your offer is what you want to help that client with.

634
00:32:48,640 --> 00:32:51,360
Speaker 3: Then you also want to explain to them the benefits

635
00:32:51,400 --> 00:32:54,040
Speaker 3: of why they need your offer whatever it is, or

636
00:32:54,080 --> 00:32:56,480
Speaker 3: what your offer does for them. And then you want

637
00:32:56,520 --> 00:33:00,760
Speaker 3: to show examples. And so once they get in and

638
00:33:00,840 --> 00:33:03,280
Speaker 3: you help them, you know, solve a problem. Guess what,

639
00:33:03,400 --> 00:33:06,000
Speaker 3: you now have a lifelong customer's way to build up

640
00:33:06,000 --> 00:33:08,680
Speaker 3: trust with somebody is to help someone solve a problem

641
00:33:08,800 --> 00:33:11,240
Speaker 3: or answer a question for that period. If you can

642
00:33:11,280 --> 00:33:14,840
Speaker 3: do those things, people will now see you as a resource.

643
00:33:15,080 --> 00:33:17,320
Speaker 3: And when people see you as a resource, now they

644
00:33:17,360 --> 00:33:19,120
Speaker 3: want to come and buy things from me.

645
00:33:19,600 --> 00:33:24,080
Speaker 2: Wow, you have it the right.

646
00:33:25,680 --> 00:33:27,960
Speaker 3: That's a couple other steps in between there, but that's

647
00:33:28,040 --> 00:33:28,800
Speaker 3: that's the over.

648
00:33:31,280 --> 00:33:34,600
Speaker 1: That was game and so and I appreciate that. Here's

649
00:33:34,640 --> 00:33:37,560
Speaker 1: a question that I have about, like how you identify

650
00:33:37,680 --> 00:33:39,640
Speaker 1: the three different types of people that you want to

651
00:33:39,720 --> 00:33:40,240
Speaker 1: work with?

652
00:33:40,400 --> 00:33:40,600
Speaker 3: Right?

653
00:33:41,240 --> 00:33:44,400
Speaker 1: So, one thing that I know that I think about,

654
00:33:44,480 --> 00:33:49,520
Speaker 1: and I know that other folks think about, is recognizing

655
00:33:49,720 --> 00:33:53,280
Speaker 1: one where we came from, like for me personally, like

656
00:33:53,280 --> 00:33:58,480
Speaker 1: I didn't come from money, right, and wanting to be

657
00:33:58,680 --> 00:34:02,360
Speaker 1: able to give back to others who are in the

658
00:34:02,400 --> 00:34:05,680
Speaker 1: position that I may have been in when I was

659
00:34:05,680 --> 00:34:11,920
Speaker 1: growing up, Right, And so where do you find time

660
00:34:11,960 --> 00:34:14,719
Speaker 1: for that or do you say, do you make a

661
00:34:14,760 --> 00:34:19,000
Speaker 1: conscious decision to say that's not something that I want

662
00:34:19,040 --> 00:34:19,799
Speaker 1: to focus on.

663
00:34:20,320 --> 00:34:23,480
Speaker 3: I'm always in the give back one. Whatever you do

664
00:34:23,560 --> 00:34:27,600
Speaker 3: to other people has already been done to me. That's ceriods.

665
00:34:27,880 --> 00:34:30,200
Speaker 3: Whether people want to believe me or not. You can

666
00:34:30,239 --> 00:34:33,479
Speaker 3: fight me about it. Whatever, You're not gonna change your mind.

667
00:34:33,719 --> 00:34:36,440
Speaker 3: It's what it is. It's already done to you. Please

668
00:34:36,440 --> 00:34:40,520
Speaker 3: believe Number two, I feel like you have a duty

669
00:34:41,600 --> 00:34:44,719
Speaker 3: once you get to the point where you're stable, if

670
00:34:44,760 --> 00:34:47,800
Speaker 3: you can teach someone else or share with someone else

671
00:34:47,960 --> 00:34:50,680
Speaker 3: that has the desire, and you got to make sure

672
00:34:50,719 --> 00:34:53,800
Speaker 3: it's people that have the desire to make the change

673
00:34:53,880 --> 00:34:57,120
Speaker 3: or to make the transition, you're good to go. And

674
00:34:57,160 --> 00:35:00,600
Speaker 3: the reason I say desire Sometimes we get frustraighted because

675
00:35:00,760 --> 00:35:03,399
Speaker 3: we are trying to force people to change that don't

676
00:35:03,400 --> 00:35:05,919
Speaker 3: want to change. We're trying to help people that really

677
00:35:05,920 --> 00:35:08,760
Speaker 3: don't want to be helped. And if you give your

678
00:35:08,880 --> 00:35:11,600
Speaker 3: pearls to a swine, the swine is not going to

679
00:35:11,680 --> 00:35:14,120
Speaker 3: recognize them as pearls. The swine is going to trample

680
00:35:14,160 --> 00:35:16,319
Speaker 3: on the pearls and then turn around and charge and

681
00:35:16,360 --> 00:35:19,239
Speaker 3: attack you. Right, you have to make sure that you're

682
00:35:19,320 --> 00:35:22,319
Speaker 3: sewing on the ground and we're not sowing seeds on

683
00:35:22,400 --> 00:35:26,279
Speaker 3: stony ground, But for me personally, I do. That's how

684
00:35:26,320 --> 00:35:28,840
Speaker 3: I ended up starting a late night business show. I

685
00:35:29,040 --> 00:35:31,680
Speaker 3: kept seeing people getting hustled. I kept seeing people getting

686
00:35:31,680 --> 00:35:35,440
Speaker 3: taken advantage of people that look like me, who were

687
00:35:35,520 --> 00:35:38,600
Speaker 3: literally you know, going into their for one case, tapping

688
00:35:38,640 --> 00:35:41,920
Speaker 3: into their savings, working second jobs, trying to do everything

689
00:35:42,040 --> 00:35:44,919
Speaker 3: right right, trying to invest in themselves, trying to create

690
00:35:44,960 --> 00:35:49,239
Speaker 3: a better future, trying to break generational cycles, gain financial stability,

691
00:35:49,600 --> 00:35:52,560
Speaker 3: trying to be happy and get paid to do things

692
00:35:52,600 --> 00:35:54,560
Speaker 3: that they like to do. And they were getting taken

693
00:35:54,640 --> 00:35:57,359
Speaker 3: advantage that they would getting pleased. Because when you get

694
00:35:57,360 --> 00:35:59,839
Speaker 3: into the social media streets, especially when you get into

695
00:35:59,880 --> 00:36:02,920
Speaker 3: the back in with ads like Facebook and Google and

696
00:36:03,000 --> 00:36:06,320
Speaker 3: you start getting into different analytics and social media marketing

697
00:36:06,360 --> 00:36:09,759
Speaker 3: and interfaces and things, there's a lot of misinformation out there.

698
00:36:09,920 --> 00:36:12,200
Speaker 3: There's a lot of new terms, you have to learn

699
00:36:12,280 --> 00:36:14,839
Speaker 3: a lot of new software and tools and things like that,

700
00:36:15,120 --> 00:36:16,799
Speaker 3: and there are people that are out there they know

701
00:36:16,920 --> 00:36:19,239
Speaker 3: you don't know what it is, and they're gonna take

702
00:36:19,239 --> 00:36:22,400
Speaker 3: advantage of it, period. And so it's like everybody can

703
00:36:22,440 --> 00:36:24,800
Speaker 3: do their part, right. So when I started doing the

704
00:36:24,880 --> 00:36:26,320
Speaker 3: late night business show, I was like, I'm gonna just

705
00:36:26,360 --> 00:36:29,120
Speaker 3: get on and teach for free. I was already very

706
00:36:29,120 --> 00:36:31,040
Speaker 3: good at what I was doing at the time. I

707
00:36:31,120 --> 00:36:32,839
Speaker 3: was I was. I thought I was doing really well.

708
00:36:32,880 --> 00:36:35,400
Speaker 3: I mean, now I make crazy money, but back then,

709
00:36:35,440 --> 00:36:37,680
Speaker 3: I thought I was making crazy money, right, I was.

710
00:36:37,760 --> 00:36:39,440
Speaker 3: I was doing you know, I thought I was doing that.

711
00:36:39,480 --> 00:36:42,080
Speaker 3: I'm like, yeah, maybe you know, fifteen twenty thousand dollars

712
00:36:42,120 --> 00:36:48,320
Speaker 3: a month, I'm lit in these streets. My big company

713
00:36:48,400 --> 00:36:50,600
Speaker 3: is doing a million a year. You know what I'm saying.

714
00:36:50,760 --> 00:36:53,759
Speaker 3: I mean, how you're doing it big? You know I

715
00:36:53,800 --> 00:36:55,960
Speaker 3: was doing so I was doing six figures from the consultant.

716
00:36:56,400 --> 00:36:58,279
Speaker 3: You know, I had a couple speaking engagements. I was

717
00:36:58,280 --> 00:37:00,759
Speaker 3: probably doing about twenty five thirty thousand dollars a year

718
00:37:00,760 --> 00:37:03,919
Speaker 3: from speaking engagement. And then the event company was doing well.

719
00:37:03,960 --> 00:37:05,440
Speaker 3: So you know, I'm like, I'm lit. You know what

720
00:37:05,480 --> 00:37:08,080
Speaker 3: I'm saying. I'm stable, Like, let me get out here

721
00:37:08,080 --> 00:37:10,160
Speaker 3: and give the people the game. Let me show them

722
00:37:10,160 --> 00:37:12,640
Speaker 3: what it really is and how to really move. And

723
00:37:13,120 --> 00:37:15,359
Speaker 3: I had no idea that late night business was going

724
00:37:15,440 --> 00:37:18,680
Speaker 3: to take off the way that it be it blew

725
00:37:18,719 --> 00:37:21,680
Speaker 3: my mind. Being obedient to God will get you very

726
00:37:21,719 --> 00:37:24,360
Speaker 3: far in life. And so and I literally still do

727
00:37:24,520 --> 00:37:27,279
Speaker 3: late night business as busy as I am. I still

728
00:37:27,320 --> 00:37:30,920
Speaker 3: at least I purposely work, and sometimes it's hard for

729
00:37:30,920 --> 00:37:32,399
Speaker 3: me to pull off, but I do it at least

730
00:37:32,400 --> 00:37:36,160
Speaker 3: three times a week. I try and broadcast and teach,

731
00:37:36,280 --> 00:37:39,160
Speaker 3: and we teach in series. So like we just we've

732
00:37:39,200 --> 00:37:41,759
Speaker 3: been going through sales training and sales series over the

733
00:37:41,760 --> 00:37:44,240
Speaker 3: past month and we just finished the series last week

734
00:37:44,480 --> 00:37:47,880
Speaker 3: on how you go from zero to ten thousand dollars

735
00:37:47,960 --> 00:37:50,640
Speaker 3: in under a week by creating your first digital product,

736
00:37:50,840 --> 00:37:53,160
Speaker 3: And I show people how to package it, how to

737
00:37:53,239 --> 00:37:55,760
Speaker 3: do the website, how to put together the back leaks,

738
00:37:55,880 --> 00:37:58,520
Speaker 3: how to make it automated, how to deliver it, how

739
00:37:58,520 --> 00:38:02,319
Speaker 3: to market it, the whole bang right, So for me,

740
00:38:02,760 --> 00:38:05,319
Speaker 3: that's my way of giving back. I also will have

741
00:38:05,520 --> 00:38:08,799
Speaker 3: in between three to five three classes or courses available

742
00:38:09,120 --> 00:38:12,120
Speaker 3: at any given time. And then of course you know,

743
00:38:12,480 --> 00:38:16,040
Speaker 3: I'm always out doing workshops and training and teaching and

744
00:38:16,400 --> 00:38:18,640
Speaker 3: all those or other sorts of types of things. Then

745
00:38:18,719 --> 00:38:21,520
Speaker 3: I also give away cash to my audience. Especially when

746
00:38:21,520 --> 00:38:24,239
Speaker 3: COVID started happening, I was like, people need cash. They

747
00:38:24,280 --> 00:38:26,520
Speaker 3: can use it for ads, they can use to buy groceries,

748
00:38:26,560 --> 00:38:28,520
Speaker 3: they can go get lashes. They do whatever they want to,

749
00:38:28,600 --> 00:38:31,920
Speaker 3: you know, do whatever you feel like. But I started

750
00:38:31,960 --> 00:38:34,279
Speaker 3: giving cash giveaways. So during the month we gave away

751
00:38:34,280 --> 00:38:37,080
Speaker 3: over well not we I gave away over ten thousand dollars.

752
00:38:37,400 --> 00:38:41,480
Speaker 3: I give away laptops, I do courses, tickets to events,

753
00:38:41,800 --> 00:38:43,960
Speaker 3: all sorts of types of things. So I think it's

754
00:38:44,000 --> 00:38:46,800
Speaker 3: a personal thing for everyone, like how they want to

755
00:38:46,840 --> 00:38:50,120
Speaker 3: give back. But I do think it's important to give back.

756
00:38:50,200 --> 00:38:53,520
Speaker 3: And you cannot forget the people who you know are

757
00:38:53,560 --> 00:38:56,640
Speaker 3: loving on you and who are supporting you. So for me,

758
00:38:56,680 --> 00:39:00,200
Speaker 3: in particular, anytime I'm giving away cash and laptop and

759
00:39:00,239 --> 00:39:02,759
Speaker 3: things like that, I give it to my customers because

760
00:39:02,760 --> 00:39:04,799
Speaker 3: I want to support people who have been supporting me.

761
00:39:05,160 --> 00:39:07,359
Speaker 3: That's really important to me. And then you know, I'm

762
00:39:07,360 --> 00:39:09,480
Speaker 3: a part of the Strategic Boycott, so I'm one of

763
00:39:09,480 --> 00:39:12,160
Speaker 3: the founding members for that, and so we're you know,

764
00:39:12,600 --> 00:39:16,080
Speaker 3: doing the mind and the research pay to keep everything afloat,

765
00:39:16,360 --> 00:39:19,160
Speaker 3: making sure we're keeping everybody in our community up to day,

766
00:39:19,400 --> 00:39:21,799
Speaker 3: up the car, what's going on right, So you know,

767
00:39:21,880 --> 00:39:23,719
Speaker 3: you find your ways, you find your ways and your

768
00:39:23,760 --> 00:39:25,000
Speaker 3: things that you're passionate about.

769
00:39:25,360 --> 00:39:28,000
Speaker 1: Can you say more about this strategic boycott?

770
00:39:28,400 --> 00:39:31,000
Speaker 3: Oh gosh, don't get me started on that. Like I

771
00:39:31,040 --> 00:39:34,360
Speaker 3: won't say shut up. Okay. So first of all, for

772
00:39:34,640 --> 00:39:38,200
Speaker 3: those of you that don't know, my bachelor's is in finance,

773
00:39:38,440 --> 00:39:41,719
Speaker 3: and I do have a master's in business, okay, and

774
00:39:41,840 --> 00:39:44,319
Speaker 3: I've been a small business owner for fourteen years now.

775
00:39:44,360 --> 00:39:46,520
Speaker 3: So I just want to put that out there so

776
00:39:46,560 --> 00:39:48,879
Speaker 3: that you guys know I'm not just like a topping head.

777
00:39:49,160 --> 00:39:50,960
Speaker 3: I do a lot of research and I put a

778
00:39:50,960 --> 00:39:53,880
Speaker 3: lot of time into this, and before the protests started,

779
00:39:54,040 --> 00:39:57,000
Speaker 3: before the riot started, before George Floyd was murdered, this

780
00:39:57,120 --> 00:40:00,200
Speaker 3: was something that I had already been sounding off big

781
00:40:00,239 --> 00:40:03,680
Speaker 3: trap about for years with another thing that motivated me

782
00:40:03,760 --> 00:40:07,759
Speaker 3: to keep doing late night business. And so basically, when

783
00:40:07,800 --> 00:40:11,279
Speaker 3: you look at black Americans, and I do want to

784
00:40:11,320 --> 00:40:13,359
Speaker 3: say this, I'm going to continue on, but I want

785
00:40:13,400 --> 00:40:14,960
Speaker 3: to make sure that I make this clear. When I

786
00:40:15,040 --> 00:40:19,840
Speaker 3: speak about black Americans that deserve some type of reparation,

787
00:40:20,080 --> 00:40:25,240
Speaker 3: some type of compensations, I'm talking about the descendants of slaves.

788
00:40:25,640 --> 00:40:30,160
Speaker 3: I think it's very important that we identify right because

789
00:40:30,440 --> 00:40:34,600
Speaker 3: for me, I don't feel like it's fair for someone

790
00:40:35,160 --> 00:40:41,800
Speaker 3: who's ancestors did not build this country, and we didn't

791
00:40:41,800 --> 00:40:46,640
Speaker 3: build it willingly. We were forced, we were murdered, we

792
00:40:46,640 --> 00:40:50,680
Speaker 3: were beaten, we were brutalized. Families were strict apart, our

793
00:40:50,680 --> 00:40:54,960
Speaker 3: communities were burned, There were massacres, there were wars. Our

794
00:40:55,000 --> 00:40:57,080
Speaker 3: people were enslaves. There are a lot of black people

795
00:40:57,080 --> 00:40:58,960
Speaker 3: who are listening to this right now that think they

796
00:40:59,000 --> 00:41:02,440
Speaker 3: came here through that Atlantic slave trade, the trans Atlantic

797
00:41:02,520 --> 00:41:05,719
Speaker 3: slave trade. Excuse me, and you were here indigenous bill

798
00:41:05,760 --> 00:41:10,600
Speaker 3: people were indigenous to the actual you know, continent of America.

799
00:41:10,920 --> 00:41:14,520
Speaker 3: So and even our history for that has been erest right,

800
00:41:15,080 --> 00:41:20,400
Speaker 3: So someone who just got here voluntarily, who immigrated here,

801
00:41:20,520 --> 00:41:23,480
Speaker 3: it's not the same thing as your people being stolen

802
00:41:23,960 --> 00:41:26,840
Speaker 3: and brought to America or your people who are already

803
00:41:26,880 --> 00:41:30,279
Speaker 3: here in America, and they were pillaged and plundered and

804
00:41:30,360 --> 00:41:34,040
Speaker 3: beaten and brutalized and being held captive and put into

805
00:41:34,040 --> 00:41:38,440
Speaker 3: slavery and then forced to work and build the country

806
00:41:38,840 --> 00:41:41,520
Speaker 3: and then to not be you know, seen as a

807
00:41:41,600 --> 00:41:44,319
Speaker 3: human and to be seen as property. And then even

808
00:41:44,360 --> 00:41:47,239
Speaker 3: when we did pull ourselves up by our bootstraps, they

809
00:41:47,239 --> 00:41:51,520
Speaker 3: would come through and tear us up canomraphy and then

810
00:41:51,560 --> 00:41:54,640
Speaker 3: they used gym prololls in the cornerstone laws. And y'all

811
00:41:54,680 --> 00:41:56,520
Speaker 3: can go and look up what I'm saying. I'm not

812
00:41:56,640 --> 00:42:00,200
Speaker 3: I'm telling you, I'm being passionate about this. Okay, grew

813
00:42:00,280 --> 00:42:02,080
Speaker 3: up in Little Rock where I grew up in Scott,

814
00:42:02,160 --> 00:42:03,920
Speaker 3: Arkansas and the country on a farm, and I live

815
00:42:03,960 --> 00:42:07,320
Speaker 3: in Little Rock now where there's always been over racism.

816
00:42:07,680 --> 00:42:11,480
Speaker 3: But they used all of those things literally when there

817
00:42:11,560 --> 00:42:15,799
Speaker 3: were black neighborhoods. Even after slavery, they went and they

818
00:42:15,920 --> 00:42:19,480
Speaker 3: used those laws literally to come and take our neighborhoods

819
00:42:19,480 --> 00:42:22,600
Speaker 3: and our property and our businesses. They still eminent domain,

820
00:42:22,680 --> 00:42:25,600
Speaker 3: and they built freeways, and they built parks, and they

821
00:42:25,600 --> 00:42:28,600
Speaker 3: build parking garages, and they built subways and all sorts

822
00:42:28,600 --> 00:42:32,080
Speaker 3: of types of things over our neighborhoods. So when someone

823
00:42:32,640 --> 00:42:38,319
Speaker 3: who has not experienced those things, Okay, comes in and

824
00:42:38,360 --> 00:42:42,040
Speaker 3: tries to have a voice in the conversation, you should

825
00:42:42,080 --> 00:42:44,400
Speaker 3: not be speaking because you don't know what you're speaking about.

826
00:42:44,680 --> 00:42:47,520
Speaker 3: And your ancestors have not had to endure where our

827
00:42:47,560 --> 00:42:51,319
Speaker 3: ancestors had to endure, and by default, you have not

828
00:42:51,480 --> 00:42:54,000
Speaker 3: had to experience the things that we have had to

829
00:42:54,080 --> 00:42:58,200
Speaker 3: experience because we're descendants of those slaves. Even when it

830
00:42:58,280 --> 00:43:03,000
Speaker 3: breaks down to programs programs in the United States for immigrants,

831
00:43:03,360 --> 00:43:07,440
Speaker 3: there are programs in the United States or fugitives. There

832
00:43:07,480 --> 00:43:10,960
Speaker 3: are not programs in the United States for Black Americans

833
00:43:11,000 --> 00:43:14,480
Speaker 3: who are descendants of slaves. Even whenever it boils down

834
00:43:14,520 --> 00:43:17,880
Speaker 3: to like, let's just take a small example. Let's say

835
00:43:18,000 --> 00:43:20,160
Speaker 3: you want to open a business and you want a

836
00:43:20,160 --> 00:43:23,360
Speaker 3: commercial space, and you want to be inside of the

837
00:43:23,440 --> 00:43:25,200
Speaker 3: mall where you want to be inside of a really

838
00:43:25,280 --> 00:43:28,080
Speaker 3: nice shopping center. Right, we have two shopping centers here.

839
00:43:28,120 --> 00:43:31,040
Speaker 3: One is called Promenade that's really really nice, pleasant Ridges.

840
00:43:31,080 --> 00:43:34,120
Speaker 3: The other they're really really nice super Horty twenty. If

841
00:43:34,160 --> 00:43:38,000
Speaker 3: you are an immigrant, there are programs that will subsidize

842
00:43:38,360 --> 00:43:42,040
Speaker 3: your commercial rent, so you're paying under one thousand dollars

843
00:43:42,080 --> 00:43:44,040
Speaker 3: a month to be in a space that could cost

844
00:43:44,080 --> 00:43:47,359
Speaker 3: anywhere from four thousand to ten thousand dollars a month.

845
00:43:48,040 --> 00:43:51,120
Speaker 3: They're not programs design they're not and you can look

846
00:43:51,160 --> 00:43:53,120
Speaker 3: city by city. You can look city by city. This

847
00:43:53,200 --> 00:43:56,800
Speaker 3: is all across America. They're not programs put in place

848
00:43:56,880 --> 00:44:03,120
Speaker 3: for Black Americans like that. Redlining is real. There are

849
00:44:03,280 --> 00:44:05,880
Speaker 3: things put in place. Right, even when we go to

850
00:44:05,920 --> 00:44:08,919
Speaker 3: get mortgages, we have to show three times more documentation,

851
00:44:09,520 --> 00:44:12,520
Speaker 3: even if we're justice qualified, even if we have better

852
00:44:12,560 --> 00:44:16,040
Speaker 3: credit scores, even if we have better job history, even

853
00:44:16,080 --> 00:44:19,120
Speaker 3: if we make more income, because the powers that be,

854
00:44:19,239 --> 00:44:22,759
Speaker 3: the decision makers, have a bias of prejudice, or some

855
00:44:22,840 --> 00:44:25,600
Speaker 3: of them are flat out racist, and that's inside of

856
00:44:25,640 --> 00:44:28,360
Speaker 3: their minds, and they are gatekeepers, and they are keeping

857
00:44:28,440 --> 00:44:31,880
Speaker 3: us from being able to get financing for businesses, or

858
00:44:31,920 --> 00:44:36,400
Speaker 3: mortgages for right or land acquisition, and of those natures,

859
00:44:36,440 --> 00:44:39,959
Speaker 3: things of that nature. Then, when you break it down

860
00:44:40,080 --> 00:44:44,359
Speaker 3: even to business loans in capital, black business owners in

861
00:44:44,400 --> 00:44:47,759
Speaker 3: America are two times more likely to get denied for

862
00:44:47,880 --> 00:44:51,200
Speaker 3: a business loan than a Caucasian American. And then when

863
00:44:51,200 --> 00:44:54,200
Speaker 3: we are approoved for a business loan, on average, our

864
00:44:54,239 --> 00:44:57,280
Speaker 3: business line or our capital is at twenty five thousand,

865
00:44:57,280 --> 00:44:59,239
Speaker 3: which we all know in here in the grand scheme

866
00:44:59,280 --> 00:45:03,239
Speaker 3: of things with a businesusiness, that's nothing compared to the

867
00:45:03,239 --> 00:45:05,680
Speaker 3: one hundred and fifty to two hundred and twenty five

868
00:45:05,719 --> 00:45:08,520
Speaker 3: thousand dollars on averaging capital that is given to a

869
00:45:08,600 --> 00:45:13,040
Speaker 3: Caucasian business owner. I'm sorry your own point.

870
00:45:13,200 --> 00:45:15,000
Speaker 2: I mean, this is so important to point out.

871
00:45:15,760 --> 00:45:18,719
Speaker 3: But so that's that's where all of this has been

872
00:45:18,719 --> 00:45:21,040
Speaker 3: coming from with the strategic boycott. So when you look

873
00:45:21,040 --> 00:45:23,520
Speaker 3: at all of those things and then you look at

874
00:45:23,880 --> 00:45:28,759
Speaker 3: Black Americans, we are the number one consumer group in America,

875
00:45:30,120 --> 00:45:33,239
Speaker 3: not creation, right, because we don't We're not number one

876
00:45:33,239 --> 00:45:36,200
Speaker 3: when it comes to ownership. Even with our black owned

877
00:45:36,239 --> 00:45:39,680
Speaker 3: businesses that are around, we average about nine hundred and

878
00:45:39,760 --> 00:45:43,040
Speaker 3: fifteen thousand dollars a year in revenue compared to about

879
00:45:43,080 --> 00:45:46,960
Speaker 3: two point three million of a Caucasian business owner. I

880
00:45:47,360 --> 00:45:49,759
Speaker 3: let that sink in, right, And part of that is why,

881
00:45:49,800 --> 00:45:51,719
Speaker 3: because we can't get the capital. If you don't get

882
00:45:51,719 --> 00:45:53,960
Speaker 3: the capital, it's harder for you to build your team.

883
00:45:54,200 --> 00:45:56,080
Speaker 3: It's harder for you to build your own building or

884
00:45:56,120 --> 00:45:58,480
Speaker 3: your own warehouse. Right, It's harder for you to get

885
00:45:58,520 --> 00:46:00,960
Speaker 3: the initial funding to be to pick up a government

886
00:46:01,040 --> 00:46:04,680
Speaker 3: contract because the government does not pay upfront, they pay after.

887
00:46:06,239 --> 00:46:08,200
Speaker 3: So I've been able like, for instance, one of my

888
00:46:08,280 --> 00:46:11,880
Speaker 3: clients here is UAMS and it's a state hospital and

889
00:46:11,920 --> 00:46:15,200
Speaker 3: I do events for them. I can handle that contract

890
00:46:15,200 --> 00:46:18,799
Speaker 3: because I have to expel thousands of dollars to do

891
00:46:18,880 --> 00:46:22,080
Speaker 3: those events, right to pay the subcontractors to pay the labor,

892
00:46:22,120 --> 00:46:24,719
Speaker 3: the venue, the food, the caterers, whatever is coming in,

893
00:46:25,239 --> 00:46:28,759
Speaker 3: and then they pay me back after the event. If

894
00:46:28,880 --> 00:46:31,279
Speaker 3: I did not have capital, which a lot of black

895
00:46:31,320 --> 00:46:33,640
Speaker 3: business owners in the position they don't have the capital,

896
00:46:33,640 --> 00:46:35,759
Speaker 3: they can't get the loan, how can you pick up

897
00:46:35,760 --> 00:46:39,440
Speaker 3: that contract? Do you all see? I'm just I'm just

898
00:46:39,480 --> 00:46:41,560
Speaker 3: trying to paint the pictures for the listeners that way

899
00:46:41,600 --> 00:46:45,080
Speaker 3: they can understand how deep this problem is. But yet

900
00:46:45,080 --> 00:46:49,280
Speaker 3: we're the number one consumers, so we're spending, spending, spending, spending, spending.

901
00:46:49,880 --> 00:46:55,280
Speaker 3: So the strategic boycott is designed to help us understand

902
00:46:55,560 --> 00:46:59,880
Speaker 3: our power in spending and start to put pressure on

903
00:47:00,080 --> 00:47:06,400
Speaker 3: these large corporations who are funding racist politicians, racist lobbyists

904
00:47:06,640 --> 00:47:11,920
Speaker 3: who are funding and supporting anti black laws and agendas,

905
00:47:11,960 --> 00:47:14,879
Speaker 3: to say, if my dollar matters to you, my life

906
00:47:14,920 --> 00:47:17,200
Speaker 3: should matter to you, and if you don't want to

907
00:47:17,280 --> 00:47:20,600
Speaker 3: put a value on my life, I'm gonna pull my

908
00:47:20,680 --> 00:47:23,760
Speaker 3: dollar from you and you're gonna listen to me. Now,

909
00:47:24,239 --> 00:47:26,520
Speaker 3: Black people do not realize right now that if we

910
00:47:26,640 --> 00:47:29,360
Speaker 3: all stopped spending for four weeks and we got prepared

911
00:47:29,400 --> 00:47:31,600
Speaker 3: in our homes and we stopped spending for four weeks,

912
00:47:31,640 --> 00:47:34,799
Speaker 3: we would shut the economy down. We're the number one

913
00:47:34,880 --> 00:47:39,719
Speaker 3: group of consumer spending over one point two trillion, and

914
00:47:39,800 --> 00:47:43,560
Speaker 3: that's a conservative estimate. So our goal is not to,

915
00:47:44,239 --> 00:47:47,200
Speaker 3: you know, try and hurt anybody or harm anybody, right,

916
00:47:48,000 --> 00:47:50,640
Speaker 3: But we have been researching companies and we have been

917
00:47:50,680 --> 00:47:54,280
Speaker 3: looking at the agendas and the politicians and the laws

918
00:47:54,320 --> 00:47:57,279
Speaker 3: that these companies support, and so then we started going

919
00:47:57,320 --> 00:48:00,560
Speaker 3: and pulling the numbers to see how much money we're

920
00:48:00,800 --> 00:48:04,560
Speaker 3: spending with these different organizations. So, fun fact, the number

921
00:48:04,560 --> 00:48:08,600
Speaker 3: one consumer of dry brain, of brains and dried vegetables

922
00:48:08,840 --> 00:48:11,840
Speaker 3: in the United States are black people. Right. Who's a

923
00:48:11,840 --> 00:48:15,279
Speaker 3: big producer of that? Quaker who owns Breaker Pepsi owns

924
00:48:15,320 --> 00:48:19,040
Speaker 3: Breaker Pepsi also is affiliated with young brands, Right, Young

925
00:48:19,080 --> 00:48:22,279
Speaker 3: foods as KFC, Taco Bell, and Pizza Hut. Long John

926
00:48:22,320 --> 00:48:24,360
Speaker 3: Silvers used to be in there, but something happened and

927
00:48:24,360 --> 00:48:28,239
Speaker 3: they're not in that, okay, Right, So you're now you're

928
00:48:28,320 --> 00:48:32,879
Speaker 3: creating ads and products and you're targeting them towards our community, right,

929
00:48:33,480 --> 00:48:37,320
Speaker 3: But on the back end, you're donating money to people

930
00:48:37,640 --> 00:48:43,600
Speaker 3: who have very strong anti black agendas and who support

931
00:48:43,680 --> 00:48:48,960
Speaker 3: police brutality against us, who support criminalization, who support harsher

932
00:48:49,000 --> 00:48:53,680
Speaker 3: prison sentences for us, right who a man who sat

933
00:48:53,760 --> 00:48:56,839
Speaker 3: up there and called Colin Kaepernick an soob for a

934
00:48:56,840 --> 00:49:01,240
Speaker 3: peaceful protest, but then turned around at car extreme Nazis

935
00:49:01,480 --> 00:49:04,759
Speaker 3: and said that there were good people and you know

936
00:49:04,800 --> 00:49:08,400
Speaker 3: what I mean? So, like, Nick, hey, like, we don't

937
00:49:08,480 --> 00:49:13,040
Speaker 3: want some bogus statement that you've written down. We don't

938
00:49:13,040 --> 00:49:16,880
Speaker 3: want some symbolic action of you retiring and your mama

939
00:49:16,920 --> 00:49:19,359
Speaker 3: and uncle being yeah, that's a good start. Or what

940
00:49:19,400 --> 00:49:23,360
Speaker 3: we want is some real change. As a matter of fact,

941
00:49:23,360 --> 00:49:25,440
Speaker 3: did you go back and actually pay the man that

942
00:49:25,520 --> 00:49:27,319
Speaker 3: post for the picture of Uncle Ben? Did you really

943
00:49:27,360 --> 00:49:30,439
Speaker 3: go back and pay him? Because initially they pay him.

944
00:49:31,160 --> 00:49:33,120
Speaker 3: His family should be eating off of that. That should

945
00:49:33,120 --> 00:49:35,680
Speaker 3: be generational wealth because that brand makes you millions of

946
00:49:35,719 --> 00:49:40,279
Speaker 3: millions and millions and millions of dollars. Right, So I'm sorry,

947
00:49:40,360 --> 00:49:42,719
Speaker 3: let me circumvent back to Quaker. So when we get

948
00:49:42,719 --> 00:49:46,160
Speaker 3: to Quaker, but of course, black people, we're number one

949
00:49:46,160 --> 00:49:50,640
Speaker 3: consumer of brains and dry vegetables on Quaker Brits alone,

950
00:49:51,120 --> 00:49:54,040
Speaker 3: does not counting oatmeal, chewey bars, life cereal and of

951
00:49:54,080 --> 00:49:57,399
Speaker 3: that other stuff from Quaker just on Brits. We spent night.

952
00:49:57,480 --> 00:50:00,719
Speaker 3: Black people spend nineteen million dollars on brit What.

953
00:50:01,520 --> 00:50:03,360
Speaker 2: I can believe that I love me some great to

954
00:50:03,440 --> 00:50:06,240
Speaker 2: move it got some downstairs girl.

955
00:50:07,440 --> 00:50:09,720
Speaker 3: I talked to one hundred and fifty five black people.

956
00:50:10,840 --> 00:50:12,879
Speaker 3: I asked all of them going their cabinet and see

957
00:50:12,880 --> 00:50:15,280
Speaker 3: if there are some grits or some oatmeal. Every single

958
00:50:15,280 --> 00:50:16,200
Speaker 3: one of us said yes.

959
00:50:16,840 --> 00:50:18,200
Speaker 2: Wow.

960
00:50:18,600 --> 00:50:23,040
Speaker 3: So that's why we started with PETSI. With KFC, we

961
00:50:23,200 --> 00:50:25,799
Speaker 3: spend the most. On average at KFC, we spend an

962
00:50:25,800 --> 00:50:31,600
Speaker 3: average of sixteen dollars her transaction at KFC. Tell your mama,

963
00:50:31,840 --> 00:50:37,560
Speaker 3: your uncles, your grandparents stop eating KFC, right, so we

964
00:50:37,640 --> 00:50:41,000
Speaker 3: can boycott these organizations. Now we can we can have

965
00:50:41,120 --> 00:50:44,839
Speaker 3: effective change because now last week they started hitting us

966
00:50:44,840 --> 00:50:47,680
Speaker 3: all up individually saying we stay with you, right, and

967
00:50:47,680 --> 00:50:50,080
Speaker 3: then the next day they'll announced, well about two days

968
00:50:50,120 --> 00:50:52,680
Speaker 3: later they are now they're gonna retire and your mama

969
00:50:52,680 --> 00:50:55,759
Speaker 3: and uncle being again. That's great, that's a great symbolic action,

970
00:50:56,120 --> 00:50:58,720
Speaker 3: But we want a real action. How about you coming

971
00:50:58,760 --> 00:51:02,920
Speaker 3: to the community and you build centers that have technology

972
00:51:02,960 --> 00:51:05,759
Speaker 3: updates every three years, and you do them, and you

973
00:51:05,800 --> 00:51:09,560
Speaker 3: do robotics, education and language and financial literacy for the kids,

974
00:51:09,800 --> 00:51:15,640
Speaker 3: and and we have community guards. How about y'all stop

975
00:51:15,840 --> 00:51:19,720
Speaker 3: funding these racist politicians. How about you take a public

976
00:51:19,760 --> 00:51:23,000
Speaker 3: stance against them. How About you work with us on

977
00:51:23,080 --> 00:51:26,920
Speaker 3: reforming the police and destabilizing their union and making it

978
00:51:26,960 --> 00:51:29,480
Speaker 3: a law where all of a sudden, they're not allowed

979
00:51:29,520 --> 00:51:33,640
Speaker 3: to have a immunity, right, and when they commit criminal acts,

980
00:51:33,880 --> 00:51:37,399
Speaker 3: they have criminal liability, they have jail time, they stop

981
00:51:37,440 --> 00:51:40,279
Speaker 3: getting paid vacation for murdering us. How About they have

982
00:51:40,360 --> 00:51:44,239
Speaker 3: to have annual mental evaluations. How About there has to

983
00:51:44,280 --> 00:51:48,000
Speaker 3: be annual humanization training, and they have to interact with

984
00:51:48,080 --> 00:51:50,960
Speaker 3: the communities that they're policing. How about y'all do more

985
00:51:51,000 --> 00:51:55,480
Speaker 3: recruitment of people of the community to be the police there.

986
00:51:55,719 --> 00:51:58,680
Speaker 3: How about we cut down some of these asinine budgets

987
00:51:58,680 --> 00:52:01,400
Speaker 3: that the police have. Some of the police's budgets for

988
00:52:01,480 --> 00:52:04,240
Speaker 3: their city. They get over fifty percent of the city budget,

989
00:52:04,239 --> 00:52:07,280
Speaker 3: those to the police department. It's not any to education,

990
00:52:07,360 --> 00:52:11,200
Speaker 3: it's not pumped into schools, it's pumped into criminalizing us, right,

991
00:52:11,239 --> 00:52:13,120
Speaker 3: because they got to protect the good white people from

992
00:52:13,200 --> 00:52:15,920
Speaker 3: all all of the big bad, boogle woogly people, right,

993
00:52:16,160 --> 00:52:19,480
Speaker 3: which is a bunch of crap because in actuality they

994
00:52:19,520 --> 00:52:22,200
Speaker 3: are violent and hostile, and they try and paint us

995
00:52:22,200 --> 00:52:26,680
Speaker 3: as violent and hostile. So that's what the strategic boycott

996
00:52:26,800 --> 00:52:29,759
Speaker 3: is all about. And every week we send out an

997
00:52:29,760 --> 00:52:32,120
Speaker 3: email and we send a cute little text message to

998
00:52:32,200 --> 00:52:34,720
Speaker 3: let people know these are the stats for this week.

999
00:52:34,960 --> 00:52:37,440
Speaker 3: This is why we're boycotting this company. We keep them

1000
00:52:37,520 --> 00:52:39,400
Speaker 3: up to date about some of the current events that

1001
00:52:39,440 --> 00:52:41,799
Speaker 3: are happening so people can stay in their jobs. We

1002
00:52:41,920 --> 00:52:44,040
Speaker 3: remind people that they need to vote not only in

1003
00:52:44,080 --> 00:52:47,480
Speaker 3: the national elections, but in their local elections, specifically for

1004
00:52:47,600 --> 00:52:51,399
Speaker 3: your judges, for your attorney generals, right, and for your

1005
00:52:51,440 --> 00:52:54,920
Speaker 3: prosecuting attorneys. So you got a cousin, you got a homeboy,

1006
00:52:54,960 --> 00:52:57,400
Speaker 3: and they got an unfair rap or unfair sentence. You

1007
00:52:57,440 --> 00:52:59,720
Speaker 3: need to remember because you didn't vote for those judges,

1008
00:53:00,800 --> 00:53:03,120
Speaker 3: right you. You chose not to vote for the judges.

1009
00:53:03,160 --> 00:53:06,120
Speaker 3: And that's why your cousin, your mama, your daddy. You know,

1010
00:53:06,200 --> 00:53:08,719
Speaker 3: everybody is able to be harassed and be thrown in

1011
00:53:08,840 --> 00:53:13,360
Speaker 3: the pen for these ridiculous sentences for none violent offenses.

1012
00:53:13,600 --> 00:53:15,880
Speaker 3: And then you have white people who commit volot crimes

1013
00:53:15,960 --> 00:53:19,120
Speaker 3: like murder and rape, and you know, child molestation and

1014
00:53:19,160 --> 00:53:21,440
Speaker 3: things like that, and they're in and out in six months.

1015
00:53:21,480 --> 00:53:21,800
Speaker 1: Cool.

1016
00:53:21,960 --> 00:53:24,520
Speaker 3: There's a lot that needs the change inside of the system.

1017
00:53:24,880 --> 00:53:30,960
Speaker 3: So the boycott is literally all about looking at our dollars,

1018
00:53:31,040 --> 00:53:33,440
Speaker 3: and you work one company at a time, so we

1019
00:53:33,520 --> 00:53:36,040
Speaker 3: have a great impact. It's not a wise decision to

1020
00:53:36,040 --> 00:53:37,440
Speaker 3: get out there and just be like, oh, I'm a

1021
00:53:37,440 --> 00:53:40,440
Speaker 3: boycott everything that is not owned by black people. Unfortunately,

1022
00:53:40,560 --> 00:53:42,960
Speaker 3: right now, there's not enough black ownership in the nation.

1023
00:53:43,280 --> 00:53:45,640
Speaker 3: There's not a black grocery chain or even a black

1024
00:53:45,640 --> 00:53:48,800
Speaker 3: grocery store in every neighborhood. There's not a black family

1025
00:53:48,840 --> 00:53:52,120
Speaker 3: that owns a large you know, arm right to supply

1026
00:53:52,520 --> 00:53:55,279
Speaker 3: the food to the stores. There's not black ownership in

1027
00:53:55,320 --> 00:53:58,560
Speaker 3: the in the transportation and in the shipping side. There's

1028
00:53:58,600 --> 00:54:01,800
Speaker 3: not black ownership in the infrastructure as far as gas stations.

1029
00:54:02,080 --> 00:54:04,479
Speaker 3: So we and on top of that, all white people

1030
00:54:04,480 --> 00:54:08,359
Speaker 3: aren't racists, right, All white people aren't racist. So, you know,

1031
00:54:09,080 --> 00:54:11,680
Speaker 3: is if we can localize and focus and go company

1032
00:54:12,120 --> 00:54:15,640
Speaker 3: by company, product by product, and they see those numbers

1033
00:54:15,680 --> 00:54:18,880
Speaker 3: plumbitting and we're all as a collective, you know, always

1034
00:54:18,920 --> 00:54:21,319
Speaker 3: adding and using our hashtags and talking about black dollar,

1035
00:54:21,440 --> 00:54:24,520
Speaker 3: black lives. You know, and you're adding Pepsi, you're adding Quaker,

1036
00:54:24,760 --> 00:54:28,399
Speaker 3: you're adding Taco Bell, you're adding KFC. They're gonna speak

1037
00:54:28,440 --> 00:54:30,400
Speaker 3: and other companies are gonna see what we're doing and

1038
00:54:30,400 --> 00:54:32,640
Speaker 3: guess what, They're not going to want the same fate,

1039
00:54:32,680 --> 00:54:34,640
Speaker 3: and so they're gonna be willing to work with us,

1040
00:54:34,640 --> 00:54:38,279
Speaker 3: and that's how we get real chain. So that's a

1041
00:54:38,320 --> 00:54:41,680
Speaker 3: strategic boycott. And anybody that's listening, you can text B

1042
00:54:41,960 --> 00:54:44,040
Speaker 3: l A C K D O L l A R

1043
00:54:44,200 --> 00:54:47,080
Speaker 3: smash it together to twenty one thousand. That'll get you

1044
00:54:47,120 --> 00:54:50,080
Speaker 3: text updates, and you can go to black Dollar Black

1045
00:54:50,120 --> 00:54:52,680
Speaker 3: Lives dot com. You can see a list of our

1046
00:54:52,680 --> 00:54:55,920
Speaker 3: initiatives and our current goals. You can see the founding members,

1047
00:54:56,320 --> 00:54:59,120
Speaker 3: and you'll see us put up like little regular weekly

1048
00:54:59,200 --> 00:55:01,879
Speaker 3: bird blurbs. We try and tap into anybody that's doing

1049
00:55:01,920 --> 00:55:06,120
Speaker 3: any type of funding for black business owners and entrepreneurs.

1050
00:55:06,400 --> 00:55:09,560
Speaker 3: We try and put up constant lists of important petitions.

1051
00:55:09,800 --> 00:55:12,640
Speaker 3: We have a whole list of different directories and apps

1052
00:55:12,640 --> 00:55:15,359
Speaker 3: where you can find black restaurants that you can eat

1053
00:55:15,360 --> 00:55:17,839
Speaker 3: at so you can go and support them. We try

1054
00:55:17,880 --> 00:55:20,960
Speaker 3: and do everything that we can in our power, you know,

1055
00:55:21,080 --> 00:55:24,000
Speaker 3: to be able to help us all make more positive

1056
00:55:24,000 --> 00:55:27,239
Speaker 3: decisions and shift our behaviors and be more important.

1057
00:55:27,360 --> 00:55:31,360
Speaker 4: I have five words, protect Ashley at all costs. Okay,

1058
00:55:31,800 --> 00:55:35,000
Speaker 4: this is why they call her King Ashley. And that

1059
00:55:35,160 --> 00:55:37,400
Speaker 4: was so much game. I can't wait to listen to

1060
00:55:37,440 --> 00:55:40,600
Speaker 4: this episode my damn self. Okay, and now I know

1061
00:55:40,719 --> 00:55:43,239
Speaker 4: you on the other end going crazy too. We're like, bro,

1062
00:55:43,320 --> 00:55:46,280
Speaker 4: I got my black fist up. I'm just over here shouting.

1063
00:55:46,400 --> 00:55:49,640
Speaker 4: I mean, I just, oh my gosh. So, actually, what

1064
00:55:49,680 --> 00:55:51,320
Speaker 4: we're going to do real quick. We want to change

1065
00:55:51,360 --> 00:55:53,520
Speaker 4: up the energy of the interview as we close out.

1066
00:55:54,000 --> 00:55:58,600
Speaker 4: And because we recognize, appreciate, and celebrate the multifaceted women,

1067
00:55:58,680 --> 00:56:01,120
Speaker 4: and we believe that it's okay to be classy and

1068
00:56:01,280 --> 00:56:04,000
Speaker 4: ratchet and you can still be elegant and dance to

1069
00:56:04,040 --> 00:56:07,160
Speaker 4: strip club music, we want to invite you too. Okay,

1070
00:56:07,719 --> 00:56:10,719
Speaker 4: the oh you clash it segment? So do you take

1071
00:56:10,800 --> 00:56:11,759
Speaker 4: on the challenge?

1072
00:56:13,000 --> 00:56:18,160
Speaker 3: Yes? Is that even though I love the lord, Okay,

1073
00:56:18,280 --> 00:56:20,760
Speaker 3: even though I'm educated, even though I'm pro black honey,

1074
00:56:20,800 --> 00:56:26,000
Speaker 3: your girls call it twerker. Okay, I'm here for we

1075
00:56:26,200 --> 00:56:26,719
Speaker 3: like to hear.

1076
00:56:27,440 --> 00:56:29,040
Speaker 2: So we're going to dive right into our first question

1077
00:56:29,200 --> 00:56:33,000
Speaker 2: for you. What topic can you talk about all day o.

1078
00:56:33,160 --> 00:56:37,280
Speaker 3: Day Ooh, I'm a nerd. I really love gardening and flowers.

1079
00:56:39,920 --> 00:56:42,160
Speaker 3: I shot an economics gardening and flowers.

1080
00:56:42,680 --> 00:56:47,400
Speaker 1: Okay, okay, I wasn't expecting that. I appreciate how that

1081
00:56:48,680 --> 00:56:49,880
Speaker 1: multi woman.

1082
00:56:50,080 --> 00:56:50,840
Speaker 4: I love it.

1083
00:56:51,600 --> 00:56:51,880
Speaker 2: Okay.

1084
00:56:52,520 --> 00:56:55,280
Speaker 3: Anybody ever looked at my Instagram story, they will always

1085
00:56:55,320 --> 00:56:57,560
Speaker 3: see me putting up pictures of my garden. I need

1086
00:56:57,600 --> 00:56:59,680
Speaker 3: to put up some videos of my tomatoes tonight.

1087
00:57:03,200 --> 00:57:06,640
Speaker 1: I am with it. So you kind of already answered

1088
00:57:06,719 --> 00:57:08,880
Speaker 1: this question, but I'm gonna ask it again just so

1089
00:57:09,000 --> 00:57:11,200
Speaker 1: that we can be clear on what we heard.

1090
00:57:11,960 --> 00:57:17,760
Speaker 3: Work or two steps all day long, unless unless unless

1091
00:57:17,840 --> 00:57:19,720
Speaker 3: my daddy is around, and I'm probably gonna hit you

1092
00:57:19,800 --> 00:57:20,439
Speaker 3: with a two step.

1093
00:57:22,600 --> 00:57:23,120
Speaker 1: I love it.

1094
00:57:23,360 --> 00:57:26,960
Speaker 4: That sounds about right, girl. Now, Actually, what song that

1095
00:57:27,160 --> 00:57:29,680
Speaker 4: gets you on the dance floor at the club or party?

1096
00:57:30,800 --> 00:57:34,760
Speaker 3: Oh oh, that's a hard one because I like so

1097
00:57:34,960 --> 00:57:37,880
Speaker 3: much music. Like I listened to a lot of like

1098
00:57:38,440 --> 00:57:40,760
Speaker 3: op rap, a lot of ratchet rap, a lot of

1099
00:57:40,840 --> 00:57:44,440
Speaker 3: hip hop, almost any line dance. I know. I'm not

1100
00:57:44,480 --> 00:57:46,320
Speaker 3: gonna say I know all line dances, but I know

1101
00:57:46,440 --> 00:57:50,480
Speaker 3: a lot of line dances, any type of stripper anthem.

1102
00:57:50,720 --> 00:57:57,040
Speaker 3: I'm here for it. I ain't gonna lie. It's hard.

1103
00:57:58,040 --> 00:58:01,200
Speaker 3: And then even some old school stuff like like write

1104
00:58:01,240 --> 00:58:05,320
Speaker 3: me down or something like that, or bag or something

1105
00:58:05,440 --> 00:58:11,040
Speaker 3: like that. I like all of this. Okay, okay, we're

1106
00:58:11,120 --> 00:58:11,760
Speaker 3: here for it.

1107
00:58:12,720 --> 00:58:19,040
Speaker 1: And our final question, since you mentioned strip club anthems,

1108
00:58:20,080 --> 00:58:20,760
Speaker 1: what would be.

1109
00:58:21,640 --> 00:58:24,200
Speaker 3: Your stripper name? Let me think about it. Don't have

1110
00:58:24,280 --> 00:58:25,920
Speaker 3: to have something to do with money. I know that

1111
00:58:30,560 --> 00:58:33,840
Speaker 3: I was all to be a million dollar mama. Oh

1112
00:58:35,960 --> 00:58:38,480
Speaker 3: coming to the stage, the million dollar mama.

1113
00:58:38,880 --> 00:58:39,440
Speaker 1: I love it.

1114
00:58:41,280 --> 00:58:42,520
Speaker 3: I need a million dollars ago.

1115
00:58:44,560 --> 00:58:46,360
Speaker 4: Actually, we just want to thank you. This was an

1116
00:58:46,400 --> 00:58:48,600
Speaker 4: incredible interview. Thank you so much for the work that

1117
00:58:48,680 --> 00:58:51,080
Speaker 4: you do in the community. Thank you for your gems,

1118
00:58:51,160 --> 00:58:53,000
Speaker 4: thank you for your insight. Thank you for just being

1119
00:58:53,160 --> 00:58:57,800
Speaker 4: unapologetically you because you really free other people to just

1120
00:58:57,920 --> 00:58:59,840
Speaker 4: be themselves, and so we appreciate you.

1121
00:59:00,120 --> 00:59:00,640
Speaker 3: We thank you.

1122
00:59:01,320 --> 00:59:01,600
Speaker 1: Lady.

1123
00:59:01,720 --> 00:59:03,400
Speaker 4: We know that you love this interview too, so go

1124
00:59:03,520 --> 00:59:06,080
Speaker 4: follow Ashley. We'll add her links in the show notes.

1125
00:59:06,400 --> 00:59:07,240
Speaker 4: This was incredible.

1126
00:59:08,360 --> 00:59:10,840
Speaker 3: Thank you so much. Thank y'all so much for having me.

1127
00:59:11,400 --> 00:59:15,600
Speaker 3: For any of the ladies listening, I do free trainings.

1128
00:59:15,760 --> 00:59:17,960
Speaker 3: I try to at least three times a week, so

1129
00:59:18,080 --> 00:59:21,560
Speaker 3: if you text the work coins to thirty one thirty

1130
00:59:21,560 --> 00:59:24,200
Speaker 3: one thirty one, you'll get a cute little text message.

1131
00:59:24,400 --> 00:59:27,280
Speaker 3: It's the link. It will give you access to free

1132
00:59:27,680 --> 00:59:33,120
Speaker 3: social media ideas. We also send free email and marketing ideas.

1133
00:59:33,600 --> 00:59:36,480
Speaker 3: We do free content and things like that. And then

1134
00:59:36,600 --> 00:59:39,040
Speaker 3: I also will text you a little notification of when

1135
00:59:39,160 --> 00:59:42,000
Speaker 3: I'm live streaming and what we're streaming about. So if

1136
00:59:42,040 --> 00:59:44,600
Speaker 3: it's something that can help your business, you can come

1137
00:59:44,720 --> 00:59:46,560
Speaker 3: right on over, you know, and kick it with us

1138
00:59:46,600 --> 00:59:47,120
Speaker 3: in the Kingdom.

1139
00:59:47,760 --> 00:59:50,960
Speaker 1: Thank you, thanks for joining us today in her Space.

1140
00:59:51,640 --> 00:59:56,840
Speaker 1: Please note that our show may contain conversations about self help, advice,

1141
00:59:57,400 --> 01:00:00,680
Speaker 1: self empowerment, and mental health, but it is by no

1142
01:00:00,880 --> 01:00:04,120
Speaker 1: means meant to be a substitute for an ongoing formal

1143
01:00:04,240 --> 01:00:08,920
Speaker 1: relationship with a trained mental health provider. If you are

1144
01:00:09,000 --> 01:00:11,840
Speaker 1: someone you know is in need of mental health care,

1145
01:00:12,360 --> 01:00:16,480
Speaker 1: please visit the Therapy for Black Girls directory Psychology today

1146
01:00:17,080 --> 01:00:18,960
Speaker 1: or contact your insurance provider.

1147
01:00:19,520 --> 01:00:21,200
Speaker 2: If you liked what you heard and want to keep

1148
01:00:21,240 --> 01:00:24,600
Speaker 2: the conversation going, connect with us on Facebook, Instagram, and

1149
01:00:24,720 --> 01:00:29,600
Speaker 2: Twitter at her Space podcast or check out our website

1150
01:00:29,600 --> 01:00:32,919
Speaker 2: at herspace podcast dot com. And before we meet again,

1151
01:00:33,440 --> 01:00:37,600
Speaker 2: repeat after me. I am not limited by any past thinking.

1152
01:00:38,440 --> 01:00:40,200
Speaker 2: I choose my thoughts with care.

1153
01:00:41,000 --> 01:00:42,440
Speaker 1: We'll see you next week, lady