Speaker 1: Welcome to Decisions Decisions. I don't think you should say
Speaker 1: decision decisions. It sounded like you was talking to Kirsty.
Speaker 1: You definitely say to welcome, welcome to the new podcast.
Speaker 2: Oh wait, you want to say together decisions decisions.
Speaker 1: How are sow?
Speaker 3: Welcome to decisions Decisions and scene.
Speaker 2: I'm your girl, mandyb I'm weezy, and all I want
Speaker 2: to know is did you meet Denzel?
Speaker 1: I didn't get to meet Denzel, and I was so sad.
Speaker 1: But let me.
Speaker 3: Tell you how to hold everything in me to not
Speaker 3: literally lean forward and go like this, because that's how
Speaker 3: close I was to the stage. I had an inner
Speaker 3: moment of being like, Okay, bitch, this is what you
Speaker 3: work hard for. Because I was so excited to be
Speaker 3: able to go see Othello when it was on Broadway
Speaker 3: and literally my seat was bb I will say I
Speaker 3: was mad though, because uh, I got so scared last
Speaker 3: year with going to the hospital and having a kidney
Speaker 3: infection that I had to the bathroom daring Act one
Speaker 3: and bitch because I was second row and they entered
Speaker 3: through the orchestra, No, bitch, I couldn't go back to
Speaker 3: my seat. So Act one thirty five minutes. I watched
Speaker 3: it on a thirty two inch TV downstairs by the bathroom,
Speaker 3: but I got Act two is the best act anyways, but.
Speaker 1: It was you know what the line came they let
Speaker 1: you go. Yeah.
Speaker 3: No, the actors were entering through the orchestra, so so
Speaker 3: like because they were doing that, they couldn't have people.
Speaker 1: If you were orchestra and bitch you got up, you
Speaker 1: couldn't where it's the five hundred.
Speaker 3: Oh by the way, I want to give a little
Speaker 3: tip to anyone if this happens again.
Speaker 1: It's no longer on Broadway. Ended on June eighth, But
Speaker 1: if you guys.
Speaker 3: Want to see a Broadway show and the ticket seemed
Speaker 3: to be a lot, if you have the ability for
Speaker 3: someone to just go to the box office and by
Speaker 3: the ticket.
Speaker 1: I paid four ninety nine for my seat. I literally
Speaker 1: at it was with me.
Speaker 3: Right after I bought it, I went on step hub
Speaker 3: to see that same row eight eighty six. So I
Speaker 3: literally saved almost four hundred dollars by getting my ticket
Speaker 3: at the box office.
Speaker 1: Ticket master got the feed.
Speaker 2: Y'all gotta just say okay, now, oh, I did want
Speaker 2: to say, uh huh.
Speaker 1: If y'all listened to.
Speaker 3: The cinema where we talked about sinners.
Speaker 1: I felt the same, a bitch need the subtitles or
Speaker 1: was a.
Speaker 3: Little upset that they didn't speak in modern day English.
Speaker 1: How would they do the subtitles in a flame?
Speaker 3: Well, bitch, I don't know what there's there's a they
Speaker 3: got listening assistance and shit. I was like, can if
Speaker 3: I could have had something to where it was broken
Speaker 3: down in like modern day talk? So here was my
Speaker 3: thing about the show. Denzel phenomenal. He was way better
Speaker 3: on this than he was the Gladiator. Like on Gladiator,
Speaker 3: I felt like, Nigga, you and Rome while you sound
Speaker 3: like you from Brownsville, Like I felt like he didn't
Speaker 3: even try to sound like I felt like we didn't
Speaker 3: even try to sound Roman, bitch.
Speaker 1: But he sounded very Shakespeare.
Speaker 3: However, the show took place in modern time, which was confusing.
Speaker 3: So set design, they wore US marines like costumes and
Speaker 3: stuff like that, but then the props were very dated.
Speaker 3: And then in one of the things, he was like,
Speaker 3: I'm gonna put you on a plane. So I'm like, bitch,
Speaker 3: are they in Venice and Cyprus and Shakespearean times or not?
Speaker 3: Like there was a confusion a little bit for me there,
Speaker 3: but Jake Jillhome, I ain't.
Speaker 1: Gonna hold you.
Speaker 2: It looked it looked heavy as I don't know, maybe
Speaker 2: it ain't. I know he say he don't watch his legs,
Speaker 2: but he did. Yeah, he came out and say he
Speaker 2: didn't watch his legs, and I was like, I watched him.
Speaker 2: For him, it looked heavy. I will say that I'm
Speaker 2: a hood boger and I'm embarrassed to say, so Othello.
Speaker 1: For those of you who don't know.
Speaker 3: The reason also outside of Denzel and Jake as to
Speaker 3: why I wanted to see this play on stage is
Speaker 3: not because I'm as Shakespeare buff, but one of my
Speaker 3: fever films. And y'all are just gonna laugh at this
Speaker 3: at this point at my film selection is OH based
Speaker 3: on OH was based on Othello?
Speaker 1: Look it up, y'all.
Speaker 3: It's with Makai Fifer and Julia Styles and so because
Speaker 3: and instead of them being like General's bitch.
Speaker 1: Makai Fifer is the star basketball.
Speaker 2: But so it was giving like Hamilton, how it's old
Speaker 2: in time but new school, like it felt like it
Speaker 2: shouldn't have Like I'm like like if these no, I
Speaker 2: loved it.
Speaker 3: I didn't say I didn't like it. I just think
Speaker 3: that the set design was odd. And I'm like, if
Speaker 3: we and modern times make these niggas speak more English,
Speaker 3: like not Shakespeare in English, but like English English. So literally,
Speaker 3: as I'm watching it, did you go by yourself? I
Speaker 3: went by myself? Absolutely? And it was dope because the
Speaker 3: lady next to me was probably like seven or eighty.
Speaker 1: She was like, I go to place all the time
Speaker 1: by myself. Which movie? Yeah, I loved it.
Speaker 3: So for those of y'all who don't know othello, I
Speaker 3: want to give it to y'all in like a urban take, okay.
Speaker 1: Because I felt so ghetto daring.
Speaker 3: Act two is when all the drama takes place, and
Speaker 3: so I'm watching it like, oh no, she didn't like
Speaker 3: I'm literally like scary movies.
Speaker 1: I'm gagged.
Speaker 3: I'm gagged. And so basically you got a general, a
Speaker 3: black general, which was Denzel. So Denzel marries this girl, Desdemona,
Speaker 3: who's like the daughter of someone really high up right
Speaker 3: in the game, let's say that really high up. So
Speaker 3: this black general marries marries her without telling her father
Speaker 3: or anything. So the father find out and it's like, now,
Speaker 3: why you married this nigga without telling me who the
Speaker 3: fuck is this. So anyways, we meet them in a
Speaker 3: setting where the father finds out and they are in
Speaker 3: the middle of something professional, war wise, work wise, whatever.
Speaker 2: But basically we I met with Iago. Iago is looking to.
Speaker 3: Become second in line after after Denzel's character Othello like
Speaker 3: comes down. So Iago's like his right hand man, Iago
Speaker 3: like doing everything loyal, trying to kind of brown nose
Speaker 3: his way to take Othello's position.
Speaker 1: Well a little did this, Nigga.
Speaker 2: No.
Speaker 1: Othello was like, yeah, no, I'm giving a job to Cassius.
Speaker 1: So Cassius is next in line.
Speaker 2: Iago med as fuck cause he's like, bitch, I should
Speaker 2: be next. So Iago, who's who you think is loyal?
Speaker 2: Who Othello believes to be his friend is? So is
Speaker 2: so angry and upset at Othello for not choosing him
Speaker 2: to be next in line.
Speaker 1: That bitch.
Speaker 3: He started putting little things in his ear, like yo,
Speaker 3: bitch sleeping with Cassius. And so we're in this like
Speaker 3: play where Othello's like, no, not my woman, Cassius. Cassius
Speaker 3: didn't do that to me, mind you. Cassius over there
Speaker 3: fucking on a little woman of the night. He got
Speaker 3: a hold, Jezebel, a little hope or whatever. Basically, Iago
Speaker 3: start setting little things, put some shit in Cassius's room.
Speaker 1: Othello finds out.
Speaker 2: He's like, there's no way that would end up in
Speaker 2: his room without my woman leaving it there. By the way,
Speaker 2: Mandy is saving you guys five hundre dollar because I
Speaker 2: didn't know we gonna get the whole poll.
Speaker 3: No, it's Shakespeare. No, this ain't no spoiler. It's it's Shakespeare.
Speaker 3: So like it's it's everywhere, Like I'm just telling y'all
Speaker 3: if you can't understand Shakespeare in English, like me, just
Speaker 3: the tea. So basically, then Denzelle's heartbroken, like Cassius, you
Speaker 3: betrayed me.
Speaker 2: Iaga, Like what you want to do?
Speaker 1: You want me to go kill that nigga?
Speaker 3: So then Iago set up to go kill Cassius because
Speaker 3: now he feels like this is a way for him
Speaker 3: to get the job that Cassius is about to get.
Speaker 3: So bro, he gonna send one of his niggas to
Speaker 3: go kill Cassius. He believes Cassie got murked bitch and
Speaker 3: did it. But Othello don't know that yet. All O'thello
Speaker 3: know is I can't have no Hoe as a.
Speaker 2: Wife, Othello is Denzel, so bitch. Next scene, Othello pull
Speaker 2: up to the room his bitch sleep. He kissed her
Speaker 2: because he's like, bitch, you got to go. So she
Speaker 2: wakes up and it is literally telling him, bro, I
Speaker 2: ain't fucking Cassius.
Speaker 1: You sitting here acting like I cheated on you.
Speaker 3: I didn't cheat on you. I don't know why you
Speaker 3: think I cheated on you. He said, bitch, you lying.
Speaker 3: You got to go, so bitch, he literally kills that bitch.
Speaker 1: Literally. You see her like so Othello like, yeah, I.
Speaker 3: Ain't dating no Ho, you got to go kill her
Speaker 3: as literally he kills her.
Speaker 1: Bitch.
Speaker 2: Come walk in his homeboy like sorry, I know we
Speaker 2: put the hit on Cassius, but that nigga ain't die.
Speaker 3: And he's like, well, I just killed my fucking wife.
Speaker 3: So a lot of fuck Cassius. Bit y'all did my job.
Speaker 1: How you ain't doing your job? Uh huh. So the
Speaker 1: friend of the wife comes in and it's like.
Speaker 2: No, not my best friend. How you kill my best friend?
Speaker 2: Fuck nigga, Oh I'm coming for you. Start yelling at
Speaker 2: motherfucking Othello and Othello, like your friend was a house.
Speaker 1: She had to go.
Speaker 3: Next thing, you know, he brings up the thing that
Speaker 3: got left in the room that Iago placed in Cassia's room,
Speaker 3: and the friend was like, nah, I took it.
Speaker 1: Mind you.
Speaker 3: The friend is Iago's bitch, So she's like, no, I
Speaker 3: took I took that thing.
Speaker 1: She really didn't cheat on you. You just killed my friend.
Speaker 3: And she starts saying all the ways in which she like,
Speaker 3: actually did this and is now realizing Iago did it, bitch.
Speaker 3: Iago walk over to her, slice her neck.
Speaker 1: Bitch, you talking too much. You got to go.
Speaker 3: So then the arms come in and it's like Iago,
Speaker 3: this fuck nigga, we know you set up to kill Cassius.
Speaker 1: You just killed this bitch. They have him in chambers,
Speaker 1: bitch now like he's trying to get out. It looks
Speaker 1: like the Chicken man. He's trying to get out.
Speaker 2: So everybody's in the scene now and Denzel realizes he
Speaker 2: about to go to jail.
Speaker 1: He about to lose his little his little things.
Speaker 3: Cassius is about to take over, and he's like, you
Speaker 3: know what, I just killed this bitch. Y'all gonna talk
Speaker 3: about me. I'm about to be disbarred now from and
Speaker 3: that's not even disbarred. What is it when you get
Speaker 3: taken out.
Speaker 1: Of the army? So he kills himself, bitch, yes, discharged.
Speaker 3: So he's literally like every which way that I have
Speaker 3: been an honorable man will now be ruined. I can't
Speaker 3: live on this earth as an unhonorable man, dishonorable man, whatever.
Speaker 1: And he's like, who kill himself? So, bitch, you literally
Speaker 1: watch it.
Speaker 3: It's like damn, everybody did and in scene and I'm
Speaker 3: just like, damn, I know I remember watching oh, and
Speaker 3: it's why I enjoyed it so much.
Speaker 1: And I was like the same way. We have the
Speaker 1: same tropes.
Speaker 3: With like the secretary who fucks with the man and
Speaker 3: tries to kill the wife because she now wants to
Speaker 3: be the wife role. Like y'all know the Beyonce movie
Speaker 3: that we've seen in thirty different renditions. I'm like, I
Speaker 3: don't know if it's on two b, I don't know
Speaker 3: where it's at, But I want to know why we
Speaker 3: haven't seen more renditions of modern.
Speaker 1: Day Othello's no dude.
Speaker 3: That ship was That ship was a tent like and
Speaker 3: it reminded me. It reminded me of like the books
Speaker 3: and and things that I used to read that had
Speaker 3: sex love betrayal, and also at the same time, how
Speaker 3: you literally could see something and completely miss it and
Speaker 3: get it wrong because of your own peripheral vision to
Speaker 3: a not believe somebody. I think like, it was literally,
Speaker 3: it's a tragedy. It's it's it's literally a tragedy. Shut
Speaker 3: the fuck up, Edden.
Speaker 2: It's literally a tragedy. But as I was watching it,
Speaker 2: I was like, ooh, t this nigga line.
Speaker 3: Oh, this bitch really ain't cheating, but she'd being accused
Speaker 3: of cheating, and then this nigga so heartbroken, you gonna
Speaker 3: kill her. I was like, I need, I need more
Speaker 3: of this, and so maybe I just need to read
Speaker 3: some more books.
Speaker 4: Come out so you could understand centers. No, no, no
Speaker 4: old English was no.
Speaker 1: Let's be very clear.
Speaker 3: In my head, I'm like Denzel macay Pfeiffer does does Madino?
Speaker 1: Does the Dino? Whatever? Does the Mona?
Speaker 3: That's Julia Stiles diss the White Man with the Dark
Speaker 3: Hair in the movie.
Speaker 1: I'm literally watching it and only know what's happening.
Speaker 3: I'm watching it actually like the tele novella, it's given espono,
Speaker 3: it's given a language I don't understand.
Speaker 2: I think you probably just need to watch more old
Speaker 2: movies because or like medieval times, because I was struggling
Speaker 2: in the middle the middle of Game of Thrones and
Speaker 2: then it went away.
Speaker 1: Now I can watch anything like that.
Speaker 2: There's different languages, there's different like at the accent different like,
Speaker 2: so once you watch it, it's like understanding Southern people. Once
Speaker 2: you down there, you start getting it, baby. But I
Speaker 2: like it, like I don't think I like Shakespearean lingo.
Speaker 1: Like actually, like for.
Speaker 3: The way that he was talking, and it was like, Bro,
Speaker 3: you just said all the words to say nothing bitch.
Speaker 3: I was like, we could have cut this down of
Speaker 3: like two sentences instead it was like three paragraphs.
Speaker 2: It's so crazy how actors memorize all that shit. What's
Speaker 2: crazy about you? Seeing Othello last night? My friend had
Speaker 2: a birthday party last night and in Walks there was
Speaker 2: more like celebrities there. Jeremy o'harris walks in and the
Speaker 2: best play I've ever seen with slave play.
Speaker 1: And he didn't know he was.
Speaker 2: She had a party and a rooftop in Central Park,
Speaker 2: and I could tell he didn't know was somebody's birthday party.
Speaker 1: He was just chilling. I was like this right, and
Speaker 1: she's like, I mean, is he going to take a picture?
Speaker 1: And You're like, how do you know Jeremy and her?
Speaker 1: She's like who that? And I was like, you don't
Speaker 1: understand who is it? So he's seeing my face and
Speaker 1: I'm like, jagged, bitch, did you see him?
Speaker 4: I think I did see him. Yeah, oh my god,
Speaker 4: later in the night.
Speaker 1: Yeah with the fro. Yeah.
Speaker 2: Bro Let me tell you writers, directors, filmmakers, they're about
Speaker 2: to become the new ship.
Speaker 1: I just found out.
Speaker 2: I'm going to a party on Friday and Writing Coogler's invited.
Speaker 2: I'm trying to figure.
Speaker 1: Out my speech. I'm not gonna bring it up unless
Speaker 1: it just so happens.
Speaker 2: Will I have too many cocktails to where I say
Speaker 2: you can rob trains and play.
Speaker 4: I hit him with that line that what am I.
Speaker 1: Gonna do is everybody gonna bring it up? Am I
Speaker 1: just gonna be the one that don't bring it up?
Speaker 2: Am I gonna like play cool and try to be like,
Speaker 2: la bitch, My nigga is gonna be there, So it's
Speaker 2: not like I'm trying to fuck. How am I gonna
Speaker 2: let this person know? I think you made one of
Speaker 2: the best movies of all time.
Speaker 1: You can just say that.
Speaker 4: No, I don't want bring it up or do like
Speaker 4: your rendition of sinners.
Speaker 1: No, I gotta wash up what you mean?
Speaker 4: Oh my god?
Speaker 2: Okay, So I want to talk about birthdays really quick.
Speaker 2: This girl throws a birthday party my homegirl, Gabrielle.
Speaker 4: I'm sorry, I'm not mad at him laughing. It was
Speaker 4: just a birthday. Yeah, I love this.
Speaker 1: It's a ketchup.
Speaker 2: Yeah, so birthdays. Friend throws a party for thirty first
Speaker 2: birthd day on a roof. She calls me this morning,
Speaker 2: and I'm sure she would repeat this story, but I
Speaker 2: think it's the same old tale as time. And I
Speaker 2: want everybody who's got a birthday coming up to hear
Speaker 2: this story and let you know you got a chill.
Speaker 2: I was like, how is your night? Because I took
Speaker 2: her mom home and my mom home. She said, girl,
Speaker 2: I am so tired. I will never do a birthday
Speaker 2: party again. I don't want to do this. At one point,
Speaker 2: I wanted to lock myself in the bathroom. I was
Speaker 2: talking to too many people. Yeah, I cannot believe I
Speaker 2: put myself through this. I'm like, damn, I'm so sorry
Speaker 2: to hear this because you looked beautiful. All your friends
Speaker 2: are there supporting you. I hate that you feel like this.
Speaker 1: She's like, next year, I don't even I just want
Speaker 1: to do a trip with my friend. Maybe two, maybe three.
Speaker 1: Maybe I need to go myself. Like she was like, overload.
Speaker 2: What is the thing? Is it that we don't have
Speaker 2: anything else to celebrate when we get older? Why is
Speaker 2: it that we keep planning these fucking things with all
Speaker 2: these people? Birthdays become so fucking stressful. I felt so
Speaker 2: sorry for this morning, Nandy. I literally was like, oh
Speaker 2: my god, you want to go to lunch? No, I
Speaker 2: want to go sweet, I don't need anything.
Speaker 1: It's like the exhaustion of hosting.
Speaker 4: A lot was going on.
Speaker 3: I mean I've been said this, Yeah, like most of
Speaker 3: the times, I don't want to know my birthday Like yeah,
Speaker 3: he literally literally I I So. I pulled up on
Speaker 3: Eden's birthday and he wasn't DJing.
Speaker 1: You weren't you weren't working that night. I literally just
Speaker 1: dj No, he wasn't eve DJing, but he just had everyone.
Speaker 1: He had everyone pull up.
Speaker 3: So and this was during fashion week and I was like, oh,
Speaker 3: Edit's birthday, let me make sure I'll pull in and
Speaker 3: I pull in, and I think maybe as soon as
Speaker 3: I got there is just when the flood of his
Speaker 3: friends came in, and I remember going to the bar like, Eden,
Speaker 3: what do you want to drink? As soon as I
Speaker 3: ordered he we did our shot literally immediately, literally and
Speaker 3: I was only there for like fifteen maybe twenty minutes.
Speaker 3: He looked at me and was like, because everyone came
Speaker 3: at the same time, everyone was like happy birthday. And
Speaker 3: then everyone started bringing him shots.
Speaker 1: And he said, help me. It was bad, and I
Speaker 1: saw his face. It's a terror. Why do we do that?
Speaker 4: I mean, she looked like she was having fun too,
Speaker 4: but I understand the sense of being overwhelmed. There's too
Speaker 4: much attention is a thing.
Speaker 1: Doubt.
Speaker 2: Yeah. She even said at one point, like every time
Speaker 2: I wanted to dance, I took a picture, somebody was
Speaker 2: taking a picture with me. I was like, babe, mind
Speaker 2: you Gabrielle's model, Like this is her job to take photos.
Speaker 2: She said, so many times I just want to dance,
Speaker 2: but you know you're really hosting. You're making sure everybody
Speaker 2: else is having a good time. I feel so big
Speaker 2: because when she was on a hunker plane and I
Speaker 2: was like, girl.
Speaker 1: Almost another one everybody has a better time at your
Speaker 1: party than you.
Speaker 4: I mean, it's not even on the dance floor the
Speaker 4: whole time.
Speaker 1: It's not even just birthday parties.
Speaker 3: Though I hear this a lot as the sentiment around
Speaker 3: weddings like that the wedding is essentially for everyone else
Speaker 3: to celebrate, like the reception the wedding, and it's not
Speaker 3: really about the couple.
Speaker 1: It's about let's be very.
Speaker 3: Clear, everyone there is gonna judge the venue, the food,
Speaker 3: the DJ, is the bar open, and is it top
Speaker 3: shelf or not? Like everyone makes it about them and
Speaker 3: so it in turn becomes a party for everyone else,
Speaker 3: and it normally isn't fun like I think that. And
Speaker 3: I just saw a statistic about even how many couples
Speaker 3: end up actually having sex the night of their wedding,
Speaker 3: and it's a very low percentage because they're both.
Speaker 2: No, it wasn't not low, but it was low enough.
Speaker 2: I think we talked about it horrible it was. It
Speaker 2: was in the fifty or something, so it wasn't that low,
Speaker 2: but it really wasn't as much as we think.
Speaker 4: Whenever I do consultations for DJing weddings, and I actually
Speaker 4: got one coming up in May, right, I tell them.
Speaker 4: I'm like, congratulations, I'm glad it's a special day, but
Speaker 4: I know it's going to be stressful because at the
Speaker 4: end of the day, it's really for everyone else. It's
Speaker 4: all the pictures they take the bride in the groom, barelead,
Speaker 4: especially the bride because it's they're specially they trying to
Speaker 4: have the dress on everything like that, and outfit's a
Speaker 4: lot exactly, and then the speeches and then the drinks.
Speaker 1: It's so crazy guys are bringing up weddings.
Speaker 2: Because after she vented for like fifteen minutes with me,
Speaker 2: the next thing out of her mouth, this girl's not engaged.
Speaker 1: She said, eloping is going to be great. That's what
Speaker 1: she said.
Speaker 2: Because the next thing you think is, oh, I'm not
Speaker 2: gonna be able to do this. Like I'm gonna tell you.
Speaker 2: It really showed me how much we throw parties for
Speaker 2: everyone else and we want to get our people together.
Speaker 1: It's too much.
Speaker 2: Like this year on my birthday, mine kind of went
Speaker 2: the other way. So I got a big ass fucking
Speaker 2: house for all my friends to come.
Speaker 4: Christ.
Speaker 2: This is what I think people should do on their birthdays, right,
Speaker 2: I'm like, just get the house and bite people on
Speaker 2: the trip, they buy the ticket.
Speaker 1: I did that for my thirty thing. Still Nope, I'll
Speaker 1: never do it again.
Speaker 2: So it was five bedrooms, Me and my man Kill
Speaker 2: and her husband Andre, It was Vannie and I think
Speaker 2: Mea and her husband. Just a bunch of friends, right, girls,
Speaker 2: didn't you know about end a trip? It was too
Speaker 2: Andre got book for an event, Vinnie had.
Speaker 1: To go viewed his mom. Everybody was like and it
Speaker 1: was real life shit plans we had for months, you know.
Speaker 3: I know I felt bad. I did all this booking
Speaker 3: my thirtieth birthday. I have friends travel from the Carolinas, Vegas, London, Atlanta,
Speaker 3: two from Vegas, one from and went from Miami.
Speaker 4: There was I think seven of us.
Speaker 3: We fly into Mexico during a hurricane. House gets canceled,
Speaker 3: boat gets canceled.
Speaker 1: And now they know how I am. Guess what.
Speaker 3: They all land right before me. And so because they
Speaker 3: all know how I get in my anxiety, they all
Speaker 3: come together and are trying to find us another house
Speaker 3: because Mexico is trying to send everyone to a fucking
Speaker 3: stadium like on some bunker down type shit I mean,
Speaker 3: And so literally we ended up going shopping. We end
Speaker 3: up still doing the boat, but the waters were still choppy.
Speaker 3: But literally dinner, dinner, reservation, everything, what.
Speaker 4: You got on a boat?
Speaker 2: No?
Speaker 1: No, no, no. Two days later, wait no, the hurricane passed.
Speaker 1: It came and passed.
Speaker 4: I still wouldn't got down on a boat for another week.
Speaker 1: Nigga. I was in Mexico. How would that be out
Speaker 1: We're from Florida. Those Yeah, a hurricane. You go out
Speaker 1: that night, Let's be very clear. I'll say, let's be
Speaker 1: very clear. A party.
Speaker 3: We we got through the night hurricane passed. I look outside,
Speaker 3: I said, also, little a couple of branches on it.
Speaker 1: We could have win.
Speaker 3: I literally was real. Florida, Like, bro, they's so extra.
Speaker 3: They always do this when hurricanes come.
Speaker 1: It ain't even that serious.
Speaker 2: Oh, speaking of birthdays, I was literally thinking, okay, so
Speaker 2: this whole thing's going on right. My boyfriend for his
Speaker 2: birthday that week, we're going on a cruise. I was like, oh,
Speaker 2: he's never done one. I've done a munch with my
Speaker 2: family back in the day.
Speaker 1: This will be cute. From La Easy. Something came up
Speaker 1: with my job. They're very big gigs.
Speaker 2: One of the days we've bet on the boat, and
Speaker 2: I was like, you know, what if we were married.
Speaker 1: He would tell me.
Speaker 2: Do this gig like that's how much money it is.
Speaker 2: He would be like, bitch, are you out of your mind?
Speaker 2: So I called him, I told him what was going on.
Speaker 2: He was like, listen, I feel like you want to
Speaker 2: do so much for me because I do so much
Speaker 2: for you. I need you to understand this type of
Speaker 2: man I am. I'm gonna tell you again. We can eat,
Speaker 2: we can sit in the hotel room. I can be
Speaker 2: right there while you do this event, even if it
Speaker 2: was on my birthday. You have got to stop overthinking
Speaker 2: these big events in life. And like I realized, my
Speaker 2: love language is gift giving so much that sometimes it's
Speaker 2: not translating because the way that I'm like to be
Speaker 2: shown up for what he's doing is the same thing
Speaker 2: I'm doing. Is that how many times I tell you
Speaker 2: we can do nothing, we can go to eat, we
Speaker 2: could go see a movie, Please stop thinking so deeply.
Speaker 2: And I was really feeling guilty because number One, when
Speaker 2: we plan something for someone or when we're trying to
Speaker 2: do a.
Speaker 1: Gesture, it really is about them.
Speaker 2: However I do at the same time, and this could
Speaker 2: be something that's totally wrong and it's semi related to
Speaker 2: your ex partner with throwing you the birthday party. I
Speaker 2: want you to know I'm doing this for you and
Speaker 2: I want you to really feel my love from this,
Speaker 2: almost more than my brain can even think.
Speaker 1: Are you enjoying this? I want you to feel it.
Speaker 1: I guess it could.
Speaker 2: It's selfish, but it's like I don't know how else
Speaker 2: to show up sometimes because I am such a pleaser.
Speaker 2: And it was just this whole conversation of like, bitch,
Speaker 2: you wear cancel a vote and we just doing dinner.
Speaker 1: Now I didn't. I found out a way to move
Speaker 1: the event, but I say this.
Speaker 4: To say move the event.
Speaker 2: Yeah, I was like, figure out another time to do it,
Speaker 2: and I charge them less money. But basically what I
Speaker 2: was gonna say was like, anyone that's planning for a friend,
Speaker 2: anyone that's planning an event, you really do have to
Speaker 2: sit and ask maybe you're not super selfish in that
Speaker 2: story you told us you said your ex was.
Speaker 1: Like, what about what I wanted to do? Those words
Speaker 1: feel selfish?
Speaker 2: Maybe I'm not saying those words, but am I actually
Speaker 2: being selfish? And we really got to sit with ourselves,
Speaker 2: like are all the grand gestures you're making, and all
Speaker 2: the plans you're trying to make actually not something that
Speaker 2: person wants. And I haven't really sat with myself in
Speaker 2: a while and thought that because I'm just trying to
Speaker 2: be a mirror of what he's doing for me. I mean,
Speaker 2: I do think that there's a difference from gifting your
Speaker 2: partners something that hasn't been discussed and giving your partner
Speaker 2: something they literally said they didn't want verbatim.
Speaker 1: Yeah.
Speaker 3: True, Like, there's power in listening to a partner and
Speaker 3: even if you can't afford or get them exactly what
Speaker 3: they ask for, to give them something they literally said
Speaker 3: they don't want because you've never done it, or it
Speaker 3: would make you feel good, or it's a way that
Speaker 3: you feel like you could show your love is selfish.
Speaker 1: And yeah, I don't.
Speaker 2: Think that showing your trying to make grand gestures to
Speaker 2: show your love is selfish.
Speaker 1: I think not listening is. Yeah, But that's.
Speaker 2: Where where I thought about your exing the party, because
Speaker 2: I'm like, oh, this is an interesting tie because mine
Speaker 2: isn't rooted in the narcissism, but it is rooted in
Speaker 2: me people pleasing. So it's like these two different things,
Speaker 2: and you I could have really have shown up and
Speaker 2: been doing something that someone's like, this is too much.
Speaker 2: So I just realized, you know, throughout this whole thing
Speaker 2: with a birthday conversation all that like.
Speaker 1: I've been doing too much. I've you doing too much.
Speaker 1: A lot of times. I even do too much of
Speaker 1: my parents.
Speaker 2: There's times where I take my mom's shop and are
Speaker 2: we doing all these extra things? You'd be like, what
Speaker 2: is it my fucking birthday?
Speaker 1: And I don't know what that is.
Speaker 2: I wonder if it's an only child, Oh my god,
Speaker 2: please like me shit. But yeah, I'm starting to see
Speaker 2: it just show up a lot.
Speaker 4: No, I mean, I feel like, I mean, don't I
Speaker 4: guess the way I'm analyzing it, what you're saying, does
Speaker 4: it sound like like me. It's more like I'm trying
Speaker 4: to make a grand gesture.
Speaker 1: Mm hmm.
Speaker 2: I don't see it as And also, it's this thing
Speaker 2: of life. Why are we doing all this shit for
Speaker 2: someone that's just happy. Even if it's a homegirl and
Speaker 2: you're planning something great for her, she might have been like, bitch,
Speaker 2: we could have went anywhere. It's that type of shit.
Speaker 2: It's just kind of like it's not always needed. So
Speaker 2: I want to say that to say keep shit?
Speaker 4: Can I can I go on the opposite room. Have
Speaker 4: you guys done the fijidas thing? You guys talked about
Speaker 4: this man to make shit say the whole thing filling everybody.
Speaker 4: So so there was a whole thing on social media
Speaker 4: at one point talking about how you don't take too
Speaker 4: much attention from the birthday person on their birthday. An example, right,
Speaker 4: you go to a Mexican restaurant. I don't care whichever
Speaker 4: one you guys go to. The point is the com
Speaker 4: you see the you see the menu, there's tacos ares
Speaker 4: burritos that ethos A discussed the etctera. You are the
Speaker 4: birthday girl. Damn, I don't want to put you in
Speaker 4: this for fuck it, the birthday girl. We easy orders
Speaker 4: fajitas on that event. Now what happens when you get
Speaker 4: the fieta?
Speaker 1: Everybody looks at you because it's smoking, and say.
Speaker 4: By looks at you because it's smoking. Now the internet
Speaker 4: was split. Do you order the fijitas if it's not
Speaker 4: your birthday?
Speaker 1: Yo? What just because the attention? Ye niggas need to
Speaker 1: go to therapy. I ain't gonna hold you. Get the
Speaker 1: fuck out of here.
Speaker 3: First off, if y'all know me, y'all know that Mexican
Speaker 3: is the bottom three worst cuisines in the world.
Speaker 1: You are hate Mexican food.
Speaker 3: So y'all will never see me at a Mexican restaurant
Speaker 3: for a celebration. But for me, I think, let me
Speaker 3: take it away from the Mexican restaurant, so that I
Speaker 3: what's an equivalent. The equivalent would be you're good dress,
Speaker 3: so you would know the equivalent would be you are
Speaker 3: the birthday girl. There is a theme for how y'all
Speaker 3: should all dress, and someone decides that even though they
Speaker 3: received the theme, they're going to show up in whatever
Speaker 3: they want to wear, which in turn it's what they wanted.
Speaker 3: They're just not listen, you know, and so they get
Speaker 3: all the attention. Now for everyone at the table, it
Speaker 3: don't matter how good the birthday girl is dressed, which
Speaker 3: we said, we're all white, and you got on fucking
Speaker 3: pattern or black or red maybe red, you know what
Speaker 3: I mean, like to stand out shah, And that I
Speaker 3: think is that's what I would say, is that's someone
Speaker 3: that maybe shouldn't be there. To me, you ordering fajitas
Speaker 3: just because it's sizzle pop and everyone I.
Speaker 2: Mean, I see it's like in a what's the word
Speaker 2: not an analogy? Yeah, it is like it's just I
Speaker 2: get it though, because to me it's it actually is
Speaker 2: a good outfit if it's your birthday. And let's just say, yo,
Speaker 2: bitch got out fit and she got.
Speaker 1: Her hair bust down and the makeup done.
Speaker 2: You just kind of like, oh my god, I thought
Speaker 2: it was all about me. Bitches be getting like that,
Speaker 2: And I saw something online to let me know.
Speaker 1: I love boy.
Speaker 2: Bitches be like what they don't want their homegirl to
Speaker 2: show them out fun their day. There is a wedding
Speaker 2: theme saying the theme is show up the bride. My
Speaker 2: homegirl did this for her wedding in Mexico City, Gila.
Speaker 2: I walked in and I was like, why does everybody
Speaker 2: look this good? She's like, oh my god. I teld
Speaker 2: everybody like, I mean, purple, pink, green, the designs ship symmetrical,
Speaker 2: sticking out.
Speaker 1: You know what that is? That is a bitch that
Speaker 1: ain't insecure like to me.
Speaker 3: To me, also, someone out be hell subjective. I've had
Speaker 3: friends I don't like how they dress at all, so
Speaker 3: they show out. Is not my show out? And if
Speaker 3: you bet that I pulled up and you like my
Speaker 3: fit and I'm just better than you.
Speaker 1: Bitch. You should have had a solace. I don't know
Speaker 1: what it's. Here's one. I don't what about the homegirl
Speaker 1: that you call your friend? What you wearing to night?
Speaker 1: I wear jeans.
Speaker 2: I can remember jeans. I'm cute, not as social up
Speaker 2: in a tight dress. But you know I was gonna
Speaker 2: put these damn jeans and take top phone. I changed
Speaker 2: my mind because I didn't like how the jeans fit me.
Speaker 4: So you feel deceived.
Speaker 1: No, I just want to like, Oh, you should have
Speaker 1: seen it. It's so funny. Shut it.
Speaker 2: No, I don't like when I step out with one
Speaker 2: other person. If it's a few of us, it's fine.
Speaker 2: If you're really dressing in heels and I'm wearing sneakers.
Speaker 2: But you could have told me this. No, this was
Speaker 2: actually funny.
Speaker 3: This just happened me and my homegirls Shanna shout out
Speaker 3: to Shauna. We went to Barmargo Barmargo on my little spot.
Speaker 3: So we go out, and we had already gone out
Speaker 3: like three or four times before then. And sometimes I'd
Speaker 3: be me my stun attire, I'll be dressed down. But
Speaker 3: every time we went out. She likes to get caught up.
Speaker 3: She's a mom, and she's like, bitch, if I'm coming
Speaker 3: up in the city, I'm gonna be cute. So what's
Speaker 3: crazy is we go to Barbargo and she's like, okay, girl,
Speaker 3: I will pull up.
Speaker 1: I decide because I know this bitchman to be dressed up.
Speaker 3: I put on my little fucking top four heels, I
Speaker 3: put this little flour dressed on a dress to wear.
Speaker 1: I showed my my boyfriend and he was like, I
Speaker 1: didn't even know you owned anything like this. What the fuck?
Speaker 3: So I shows each I show up and I'm dressed
Speaker 3: up and she said, now, bitch, why you all dressed up?
Speaker 1: I said, bitch, because you already dressed up. And I
Speaker 1: felt bad that I don't be mad at yo.
Speaker 3: She came dressed down and she was like, bitch, I
Speaker 3: dressed down because I knew I got to meet which'all asked.
Speaker 2: So's a deal unless we playing sneak.
Speaker 3: I guess that's different at thirty at thirty five, depending
Speaker 3: on where we're going, we need flat no dress, dress
Speaker 3: for dress for the occasion, Like, bitch, you might be
Speaker 3: going to bad. I got a boyfriend, and if I
Speaker 3: don't want to dress up. I'm gonna dress with what
Speaker 3: makes me comfortable. Me and my friends actually now do
Speaker 3: not ever have conversations about, well, what you're wearing, because
Speaker 3: everyone has their own styles. Nine times out of ten,
Speaker 3: I ain't gonna like half the ship my fraywhere.
Speaker 2: To me if we're going casual, because I do think
Speaker 2: like if we're gonna show up casual together, like if
Speaker 2: me and my girl, if it's a Friday night we're
Speaker 2: going to club. If we really gonna be casual, let's
Speaker 2: be on a ship together, beach, Let's do the crop
Speaker 2: top and the cargo jeans together.
Speaker 4: Switch it up.
Speaker 3: Oh, you know, my best friend twist her ankle, and
Speaker 3: I knew that hole was gonna be wearing flats for
Speaker 3: a while.
Speaker 1: Well, bitch, I'm wearing heels. Doc my friend I wear bitch,
Speaker 1: lost a broke the fuck Anyway, let's get to our
Speaker 1: no host Bart.
Speaker 3: If you haven't yet, guys, make sure you purchase no
Speaker 3: host Bart to do a manifesto of sexual exploration and
Speaker 3: power and join us on tour NHB tour dot com.
Speaker 3: We are bringing the pages, took the stages in a
Speaker 3: city near you. We are making it so different than
Speaker 3: any live show you've seen before, but you were still
Speaker 3: getting all of the horrible Okay.
Speaker 1: Are we taking a page? Are you picking it? No?
Speaker 3: I am reading an excerpt. Okay, this comes from my chapter.
Speaker 3: Why don't they just call it a vacuum? So this
Speaker 3: is the chapter around my abortion. It's in the pain
Speaker 3: section of the book. My mom says she wishes she'd
Speaker 3: had this conversation with me earlier, and that it wasn't
Speaker 3: in the form of a trauma bond. No one had
Speaker 3: talked to her either, so this was part of our
Speaker 3: familial cycle. She said she would have talked to me
Speaker 3: earlier about the consequences and results of the actual birds
Speaker 3: and bees.
Speaker 1: But here's the issue. The problem is a cyclical one.
Speaker 3: Before she got pregnant at fifteen, no one had ever
Speaker 3: talked to her about sex either. Those were from different generations.
Speaker 3: My mom and I both remember being told very little
Speaker 3: at school. She didn't have planned parenthood or any resources
Speaker 3: at the time. In Newport, Ritchie, Florida, where she grew up.
Speaker 3: I remember a sex ad class where we, and when
Speaker 3: I say we, I mean the young women were told
Speaker 3: by our teacher to abstain from having sex the boys
Speaker 3: were going to be boys and the girls were going
Speaker 3: to say angelic virgins. Somehow, math is my strong suit,
Speaker 3: and I remember thinking about how it would work in
Speaker 3: real time that math was not mathing. We were told
Speaker 3: not to have sex because we would either A get pregnant,
Speaker 3: B get HIV or some other sexually transmitted disease that
Speaker 3: would make you filthy or see all the above. Well,
Speaker 3: I was battling the multiple choice selection, and here I
Speaker 3: was being a pregnant. I wanted to ask both of
Speaker 3: you if there is any conversation, and I know this
Speaker 3: may be a difficult question for you because she's no
Speaker 3: longer here, but are there any conversations that you wish
Speaker 3: you had had specifically with your mom regarding sex or
Speaker 3: sex sooner that maybe came up later.
Speaker 4: I think no, no, because there typically For me, it
Speaker 4: all came from my father as a man that I
Speaker 4: swear the birds in the bees conversation was five seconds
Speaker 4: that month with your dad. Yeah, and your mom never
Speaker 4: had it, which everything I've learned in terms of sex
Speaker 4: is from the entering.
Speaker 1: How are you? Oh? Wow? They had you. I wonder
Speaker 1: if this had to do with.
Speaker 4: Age thirty, because it's my father's sixty.
Speaker 3: Okay, oh wow, so even later on we're a little
Speaker 3: bit more mature.
Speaker 1: They definitely knew themselves more sexually. Yeah wow. And it
Speaker 1: was still like five seconds and that which is.
Speaker 4: But but I don't condom condom? Yeah basically that's really what?
Speaker 1: Right?
Speaker 4: Yeah, like basically that just wear a condom or don't
Speaker 4: get people pregnant.
Speaker 1: I'll be honest with you.
Speaker 3: My mom even knowing I was having sex because I
Speaker 3: had to come and throw a positive pregnancy test on
Speaker 3: the bed. I had wished that, and and that happened
Speaker 3: when I was just about to turn sixteen. And for me,
Speaker 3: that was definitely the age where instead of me being
Speaker 3: told to go to the other room or anything like that,
Speaker 3: it should have been where when her friends was over,
Speaker 3: my aunties were over and conversations were being had because
Speaker 3: a lot of my mom's friends and my aunts was dating.
Speaker 1: They weren't.
Speaker 3: Like again, I didn't grow up seeing healthy marriages or
Speaker 3: people in long standing relationships.
Speaker 1: Like my aunt wasn't with my uncle, my mom wasn't
Speaker 1: with my dad.
Speaker 3: Her friends were all single bitches out you know, they
Speaker 3: go on a playpool to find some niggas, and so
Speaker 3: I wish just the conversation about how sex doesn't really
Speaker 3: make someone like you happen.
Speaker 1: And I do wish that I knew.
Speaker 3: The trauma that my mom experienced with sex, with dating,
Speaker 3: and specifically her decision to have an abortion. I wish
Speaker 3: that conversation came without the need to trauma bond with
Speaker 3: each other. I would have liked to known my mom
Speaker 3: a little bit more or as a woman and not.
Speaker 1: Just a mom personally. What about you?
Speaker 2: I mean, I talked to my mom talked about sex
Speaker 2: so early, and I'm sure we'll dig into this convo
Speaker 2: when we interview her tomorrow, but something that's just coming
Speaker 2: to my mind. It's interesting because like a lot of
Speaker 2: my homegirls talk about their mom with dating experiences and
Speaker 2: I can't relate because she was married. But the interesting
Speaker 2: thing is, I think it's very reflective. I saw my
Speaker 2: mom in her dating. Technically, every single day all I
Speaker 2: saw was my mom and is wife, you know what
Speaker 2: I mean. So even though I knew her as an
Speaker 2: individual person, I think it's probably what shaped me to
Speaker 2: be the type of person I am because she was
Speaker 2: such a wife. Being a housewife, that's your job. Every
Speaker 2: single day, you're showing up like that, you're being that
Speaker 2: type of person.
Speaker 1: Like. It was a weird thing too, because when I.
Speaker 2: Got older and started dating men, my homegirls and I
Speaker 2: have of course had relationship talks. When I started dating
Speaker 2: romantic relationships, you talk a lot more about like my
Speaker 2: mom was saying, you know, et cetera. I didn't realize
Speaker 2: how jaded I was to single mom. It's pain like
Speaker 2: just because the dating experience as a mom, a kid
Speaker 2: sees it completely. They're watching it, they're viewing it like
Speaker 2: that never happened to me. I don't really know what
Speaker 2: my mom was like in according stage when I never
Speaker 2: really asked much about like when they met. I also
Speaker 2: don't really know what kind of happens when she's heartbroken
Speaker 2: or sad.
Speaker 1: They were in a marriage the whole time. I never
Speaker 1: saw those phases.
Speaker 2: So everything I learned about that shit is just through
Speaker 2: conversations through friends. So that's even and your parents were married, right, yeah,
Speaker 2: so like, yeah, that's something.
Speaker 3: Yeah, my experience seeing that it was interesting because through
Speaker 3: writing this book, I you know, I got to really
Speaker 3: learn my mom more and her relationship with men, and
Speaker 3: I remember getting so fucking mad at her and I
Speaker 3: snapped at her as an adult now. I remember asking
Speaker 3: her like, who, if any of the partners that I
Speaker 3: know of over the past thirty years did she feel
Speaker 3: like was her favorite or the best or the one
Speaker 3: that she wishes lasted? And the name of the person
Speaker 3: that she said to me calls so much trauma as
Speaker 3: a child, like basically in their breakup, he threatened to
Speaker 3: share something that led my mom to try to commit suicide,
Speaker 3: and it like I don't want to cry with it.
Speaker 1: I was so mad at her.
Speaker 3: I said, that's the nigga, And I said, you're pathetic,
Speaker 3: and I said, I want you to take it to therapy.
Speaker 1: This man that.
Speaker 3: Maybe you're remembering how he maybe made you feel. But
Speaker 3: the person that at the end tried to literally ruin
Speaker 3: our family and did somewhat like brought a lot of
Speaker 3: things out to where you literally almost like you know,
Speaker 3: and I had to witness that, and I was so
Speaker 3: upset and I was like, oh, I'm sorry, this is
Speaker 3: something recent, and I was just like, in terms of
Speaker 3: the conversations with my mom about like what healthy relationships
Speaker 3: could look like, it frustrates me that at thirty five,
Speaker 3: I feel like I'm teaching her how to date and
Speaker 3: value herself more and seek out a partner that's worthy
Speaker 3: of her. And I just feel like it's in reverse
Speaker 3: now because I've had this show for the last eight
Speaker 3: years and I've been able to learn myself and I've
Speaker 3: gone to therapy. My mom is just what is now
Speaker 3: in therapy for the first time in her life at
Speaker 3: fifty five.
Speaker 2: I think, and I mean even now we see your
Speaker 2: mom isn't even really wrong for probably thinking it, because
Speaker 2: we now know sometimes those highs and loads of relationships,
Speaker 2: you really keep in mind the good yeah, you want to,
Speaker 2: you want to, so it's almost more prevalent than the
Speaker 2: good guys. She probably passed over that maybe you thought
Speaker 2: about because no, no.
Speaker 1: No, no, let's be very clear. They all suck. Oh well,
Speaker 1: I like that's why I was like, which which one
Speaker 1: was the best?
Speaker 3: And what's crazy is the one that I liked the
Speaker 3: most as an adult he was an alcoholic. He was
Speaker 3: an alcoholic and a gambler. So although he was fun
Speaker 3: and he was caring and we really like enjoyed his
Speaker 3: presence because he was a lot of fun with my mom, financially,
Speaker 3: he was in debt because he would either drink or
Speaker 3: gamble all his money away, and so from an aspect
Speaker 3: of he was always a great person to be around.
Speaker 3: As an adult standpoint, he wasn't great like And it
Speaker 3: sucks that me. Looking through the history of my mom,
Speaker 3: I don't see any any quality in her decisions of dating,
Speaker 3: but in talking to her as an adult and recognizing
Speaker 3: the traumas of her with her stepdad, I just see
Speaker 3: how much has passed down and what we see. A
Speaker 3: lot of us only know what we don't want, which
Speaker 3: is why I always say I grew up knowing I
Speaker 3: didn't want to nigga like my daddy, but I didn't
Speaker 3: grow up with an example of a man that I
Speaker 3: Actually that's an example of a man.
Speaker 1: I do the opposite to men.
Speaker 2: Actually, yeah, my ex said all the time, my dad,
Speaker 2: it's like he's just pinnacle, fuck you, fuck you like
Speaker 2: my dad.
Speaker 1: This, my dad this.
Speaker 2: And it was crazy because maybe towards the end of
Speaker 2: my relationship not old baby, but another ex said, this
Speaker 2: man that your dad is is so not realistic to
Speaker 2: today's time, and it's not realistic to even the man
Speaker 2: you're looking for. That when you compare, it's frustrating. My
Speaker 2: dad doesn't really drink. My dad doesn't go out that like,
Speaker 2: I would love someone social. I've literally said on this podcast,
Speaker 2: I won't date someone but don't drink. And so just
Speaker 2: thinking about it, I'm like, oh, I really am comparing
Speaker 2: to the man that I'm not even looking for. My
Speaker 2: dad is super chill, doesn't really care. I like someone
Speaker 2: a little more hyper and more extroverted. Like it's crazy
Speaker 2: because I didn't know how much I was setting a standard.
Speaker 1: So it's like when they really are, it's all daddy issues.
Speaker 2: At the same time, maybe my daddy issues may look different,
Speaker 2: but the fact that I compared every man, it's fucked up. Oh, well,
Speaker 2: my dad does this, he takes care of the house.
Speaker 2: He would never let my mom do this. Like, meanwhile,
Speaker 2: teamwork is such a normal part of twenty twenty five.
Speaker 2: Let's be honest about the economy here. I don't even
Speaker 2: want to be a housewife. But yet in the same breath,
Speaker 2: I'm telling you I shouldn't be doing this because my
Speaker 2: dad would never let me do it. Like, it's almost
Speaker 2: crazy that the first impression of dating and men all
Speaker 2: comes from this one man.
Speaker 1: It sucks, oh for you. Yeah, I've viewed a lot
Speaker 1: of fun.
Speaker 2: No, but even in the opposite way, the impression of
Speaker 2: men in a negative way or positive.
Speaker 1: That's it.
Speaker 3: I do want to skip reaction air for this episode
Speaker 3: and do and get just a little bit more into
Speaker 3: the decision's decisions because I want to have more fun
Speaker 3: talking about it. I think it's been really fun to
Speaker 3: teach you guys the historical kind of ways in which
Speaker 3: certain things around sex started. And this week, y'all don't
Speaker 3: make fun of me for the last one, because y'all
Speaker 3: know I don't believe it, but we getting into it.
Speaker 3: We were talking about fertility rituals, the so sex soil
Speaker 3: is sacred?
Speaker 1: Did you so before fertility clinics?
Speaker 3: And again, because I've spoke about talking to my friends
Speaker 3: about navigating their biological clock and all these things, I
Speaker 3: wanted to get into what people were doing before they
Speaker 3: could go and literally get tested and to see if
Speaker 3: they could have babies or not. So before fertility clinics,
Speaker 3: people turn to sex magic, moon phases in sacred dances.
Speaker 3: That's you're real to help the babies come the moon
Speaker 3: phases real, bitch, you believe it.
Speaker 1: I'm gonna tell you how I know. Read the love chapter.
Speaker 3: Okay, yeesh, it's scary Also, what do you mean, so
Speaker 3: what do you know about moon phases being tied to
Speaker 3: fertill like just.
Speaker 2: But all are different stages of ovulation heightened fertility like
Speaker 2: it's crazy because we don't talk about it much anymore
Speaker 2: because we have so many other options. But the moon
Speaker 2: phases were like the number one resource back in the
Speaker 2: olden times on when it was prime and optimal to
Speaker 2: get pregnant. And our period also is connected to the
Speaker 2: moon as.
Speaker 3: Well, even though we all have different cycles. Yes, interesting,
Speaker 3: goddamn very interesting there is.
Speaker 1: Don't believe it's not the oh Freddian cycle.
Speaker 2: I believe not to be a hotel because I learned
Speaker 2: this watching nineteen Keys clip. It was a nigga talking
Speaker 2: meant to be very hotel.
Speaker 1: Oh no, no, no, I thought this motherfucker is bullshit.
Speaker 2: He wasn't saying it was somebody out on them like
Speaker 2: this nigga sounds stupid talking about pussy and furies, and
Speaker 2: I was like, oh, I guess not. Well, let's start
Speaker 2: as long as you got a coofie on off of
Speaker 2: the talk shit.
Speaker 1: But some of it be good, some of it don't.
Speaker 1: Let's start with the with some historical hot spots.
Speaker 3: Now, y'all know, we'd be liking to take y'all around
Speaker 3: the world, no passport needed. So in ancient Mesopotamia, it's
Speaker 3: always over there. Where is Mesopotamia? That's a real place. No,
Speaker 3: it was, It don't exist no more. I think it
Speaker 3: is the Roman or greeklan. Sorry, we're gonna let y'all
Speaker 3: know where y'all at. It's a bottom of Mediterranean seat
Speaker 3: in the Persian Gulf.
Speaker 2: Iraq, Iraq, Yeah, bitch, it exists in a bombs cataline empire.
Speaker 1: That was all it.
Speaker 2: Today Mesopotamia is actually known as present day Iraq, So bitch,
Speaker 2: we in Iraq.
Speaker 1: Uh this only time y'all gonna be able to go there,
Speaker 1: all right?
Speaker 3: So the goddess Inana's high priestess would perform sacred sex
Speaker 3: rituals with kings to ensure a fertile kingdom. This was
Speaker 3: called called heroes gamos. So basically I think it's heroes
Speaker 3: or none. No, I'm saying the game, look.
Speaker 1: At me making the Spanish it probably.
Speaker 3: And yeah, so I guess now here's the thing. Were
Speaker 3: goddesses real things? The goddess, yes, would perform sacred rituals.
Speaker 3: Goddesses was real? I thought gods and goddesses was fake.
Speaker 2: They're humans that became much like a you could say,
Speaker 2: like a prophet. Then Aphrodite is real. They made statues
Speaker 2: after them. They were real though, Yeah, real people.
Speaker 1: Yes.
Speaker 3: Hades and Zeus was real people. Yes, But Sidon he
Speaker 3: was he was in the ocean.
Speaker 1: He wasn't real real.
Speaker 2: You gotta think, for example, no, I need you no, no,
Speaker 2: For example, Moses and the parting of the Red Sea.
Speaker 1: Now that's a Bible person, let me get it, let
Speaker 1: me cook.
Speaker 2: People say, even though that sounds crazy that he did that,
Speaker 2: it was really a low tide sol all of the
Speaker 2: Poseidon ship, all of the Aphrodite shit.
Speaker 1: These gods and goddesses, they were humans. They was not humans.
Speaker 4: Ever, assertion that Greek gods are non real supported by
Speaker 4: archaeological elements evidence excuse me, comparative monology. The Greek gods,
Speaker 4: as depicted in mythology are not considered to be literal,
Speaker 4: spiritual beings that existed in the physical world. By monitor.
Speaker 1: They was not in the physical world, that was not human.
Speaker 4: However, they are viewed as powerful, symbolic.
Speaker 1: Symbolic they simples. They're not she said they were humans.
Speaker 3: At one point this is given my chicken wing. I
Speaker 3: think my chicken wing. Take bit, no, I think this
Speaker 3: is that was Hades and Zeus was not real Hercules.
Speaker 4: Wings all the time.
Speaker 3: I believe it and thought the wing was a toe.
Speaker 3: Don't don't do that. That's just an anatomy that I
Speaker 3: got wrong. You would see here.
Speaker 2: You thought a chicken wing and collucting on this day camera.
Speaker 3: B I just said it. It is kind of a toe.
Speaker 3: It's just the finger. Then, bitch, I got the wrong.
Speaker 2: I believe they were real, and I believe these books
Speaker 2: and all this Google ship makes us wants us to think.
Speaker 1: It's faith.
Speaker 3: And you can now join Weezy's call at weezysct dot
Speaker 3: com just like I think and real. All right now,
Speaker 3: y'all know we had to take it over to Egypt
Speaker 3: and the Pharaoh, which the pharaoh.
Speaker 1: Was an actual human being. This is.
Speaker 4: Now, I don't think anything's real.
Speaker 3: The pharaoh was real, that was a real. This one
Speaker 3: is crazy, y'all of Egypt. This one is crazy. And
Speaker 3: this is how I guess he wanted to boost fertility
Speaker 3: around Egypt. The pharaoh was expected to ejaculate into the
Speaker 3: Nile during a fertility festival to.
Speaker 1: Bless the lamb bitch.
Speaker 3: I want to know who had to watch it or
Speaker 3: if he did it in silence or he poured it
Speaker 3: from a cup like well.
Speaker 1: I think it was probably a kink because you know
Speaker 1: the grinks was freaks. No, you wished me in Egypt
Speaker 1: not Greece.
Speaker 4: Well all of them A good question. They also the
Speaker 4: jar directly, like.
Speaker 1: Did he have to nut immediately? Or did was it
Speaker 1: just his ferm? That was maybe everybody watched it.
Speaker 3: No, he said it he was expected to ejaculate into
Speaker 3: the nile, So I feel like he had to nut
Speaker 3: into the river. This is crazy, y'all. Okay, So northern
Speaker 3: Celtic tribes, how do we get here? For the fertility
Speaker 3: of this Bonfires and beltane orgies were common. People believe
Speaker 3: sex during these rituals would ensure abundant crops and healthy livestock.
Speaker 1: So basically they threw a whole orgy.
Speaker 3: Where people assumed that during this moment, as we're having
Speaker 3: sex and essentially everything around us would be fertile, so
Speaker 3: the livestock would grow, plants would grow, and that I
Speaker 3: would inseminate you at the same time, because we're in
Speaker 3: belief that this is corn.
Speaker 1: You know what I mean.
Speaker 2: I wonder if there's something that they used to do
Speaker 2: with taste. Just imagine you're like, hey, how do I
Speaker 2: know if my seaman's any good? If it's salty, it's this.
Speaker 2: If it's sweet, it's this. How do you know what
Speaker 2: healthy semen was back then? It can't just be consistency.
Speaker 1: You probably had to eat it.
Speaker 3: I'll say my thoughts, My thoughts on that is that
Speaker 3: nut consistency. While yes, there's healthy and unhealthy, I do
Speaker 3: also think it's subjective of what's healthy.
Speaker 1: No, no, no, of.
Speaker 2: What someone back then would assume it to be, because
Speaker 2: it would be based on what you enjoy.
Speaker 1: I know people like different nuts like you do. I
Speaker 1: like different nuts.
Speaker 3: I think i'll guarantee you since you like bukaki and
Speaker 3: shit like it and cream pies, the consistency and weigh
Speaker 3: in which you like nut is probably different than I
Speaker 3: like nut.
Speaker 1: And this is y'all getting horrible decisions at this point.
Speaker 3: But I think we're late enough into the shel to like,
Speaker 3: what is your your choice of not consistency? Okay, so
Speaker 3: let's talk about Wait, we might ask you what your
Speaker 3: nut consistency is.
Speaker 2: Yeah, it's I like a volume shooter or I like
Speaker 2: a drip down shoot. Sometimes I like it to shoot
Speaker 2: right up and then it just drips down the dick.
Speaker 1: Okay.
Speaker 2: I like to see it go from super thick white
Speaker 2: to get runny a little bit, and then if I
Speaker 2: pick it up to eat it, I like to be
Speaker 2: able to still see the white.
Speaker 1: Don't clear up too quick. I still need white see.
Speaker 1: Not that I'm racist. I ain't gonna hold you.
Speaker 3: I I like just enough nut to where I feel it.
Speaker 2: But no, I don't like a lot of nut. I
Speaker 2: like one moment. I like just enough to be like, ooh,
Speaker 2: you can't. I don't like volume. I don't want it
Speaker 2: to be like a puddle.
Speaker 1: I don't.
Speaker 2: I also don't like it too thick. I like it
Speaker 2: to kind of be like, like, what's.
Speaker 1: The point in a little bit of squirt? Might as
Speaker 1: well pee? No, that's how I feel. Might as well
Speaker 1: nut cool?
Speaker 3: So to me the law, I like it, And I
Speaker 3: also like it clear anything white, maybe because I associated
Speaker 3: with a yeast infection and I know it's not the same.
Speaker 3: I don't like super white shit like even okay, you
Speaker 3: know I watch gay porn.
Speaker 1: You want clear nuts? Oh, I'm not gonna lie when
Speaker 1: I watch gay porn.
Speaker 2: If there's too much white stuff coming out the asshole
Speaker 2: onto the dick, I'm like, oh, it's too mess isy, yucky.
Speaker 1: Don't know why it's so much white sulk, because that's
Speaker 1: the louver colored to make a hunt. I don't like it,
Speaker 1: so I won't.
Speaker 3: I will turn off a video if if the dick
Speaker 3: turns white from this.
Speaker 1: Well, now that we've taken you to Egypt, everything we should,
Speaker 1: I don't like it. No, no, no, no, no, hold on,
Speaker 1: hold up, let me finish, Let me finish. I have
Speaker 1: two more places.
Speaker 3: So Japan Shinto tradition phallic festivals, y'all know, phallic means
Speaker 3: penis or penis like shapes like Kanamara Matsuri celebrated fertility
Speaker 3: with giant penis shaped floats.
Speaker 1: By the way, y'all, this is still celebrated today.
Speaker 3: I've not been to Japan yet, and I think for
Speaker 3: research purposes, maybe the businessness can cover half of my trip.
Speaker 1: Since it's for research, I'd.
Speaker 3: Love to go be able to film these giant penis
Speaker 3: shape floats. Last one in West Africa and Yoruba religion
Speaker 3: Yoroba Thank you, Aba, fertility dances and offerings to Osha,
Speaker 3: Goddess of Love and fertility.
Speaker 1: I'm a hotel though, don't you know.
Speaker 3: By the way, they continue still today in Nigeria and
Speaker 3: diaspora communities, but there are still fertility dances and offerings
Speaker 3: to this goddess as a way to.
Speaker 1: It's afrobast basically that hope.
Speaker 3: These rituals made fertility communal joyful and spiritual, with women
Speaker 3: often seen as life bringers rather than passive vessels. So
Speaker 3: they celebrated the female bodies, their ability to carry the
Speaker 3: acknowledgment that there was a womb there that brought life
Speaker 3: into things, and so it was a way to celebrate
Speaker 3: women is not just things to bend over and fuck.
Speaker 1: And get your net off.
Speaker 3: But yeah, so that is the history of fertility in
Speaker 3: some of the rituals that have been used over time.
Speaker 2: Well, I will make sure to try my fertility dance
Speaker 2: tonight in the club.
Speaker 1: I'm staying far away from all this shit, y'all.
Speaker 2: Head on over to patreon dot com backslash Horrible Decisions
Speaker 2: if you want more sex than just me and Mandy
Speaker 2: talking about the kind of com and that we like.
Speaker 2: And also NHB tour dot com. Come and check us
Speaker 2: out in a bunch of cities. I was gonna name them,
Speaker 2: but we had no time.
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Speaker 1: sure you get your tickets, make sure you support us.
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Speaker 1: And once again, thank you so very much for tuning in.
Speaker 3: I'm gonna blend it for this outra for listening to
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