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Speaker 1: It is time now for today's Strawberry Letter. If you

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Speaker 1: need advice on relationships, work, sex, parenting, and more, please

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Speaker 1: submit your Strawberry Letter to Steve HARVEYFM dot com and

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Speaker 1: click submit Strawberry Letter.

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Speaker 2: We could be reading your.

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Speaker 1: Letter live on the air, just like we're going to

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Speaker 1: read this one right here, right now, and you never

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Speaker 1: know it could be yours.

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Speaker 2: You never know. Buckle up and hold on tight. We

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Speaker 2: got it to you here. It is Strawberry Letter. Thank you.

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Speaker 1: Nev subject she got buck Wilde on the dance floor.

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Speaker 1: Dear Stephen Shirley, I'm a fifty eight year old man

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Speaker 1: and I have had two marriages that didn't work. I

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Speaker 1: rushed in and didn't get to know them because I

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Speaker 1: cannot make it without a woman by my side.

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Speaker 2: I started dating a beautiful woman right after.

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Speaker 1: This last divorce, and my family urged me to take

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Speaker 1: my time and get to know this one and write

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Speaker 1: when I was about to make the same mistake a

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Speaker 1: third time. This woman showed out and made me think

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Speaker 1: twice about her. But because I'm not the best judge

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Speaker 1: of character, I wanted to run it by you first.

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Speaker 1: I'm an attorney and my girlfriend is a judge. We

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Speaker 1: live in a small town, so we go to a

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Speaker 1: nearby city to hang out. She recently moved to my

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Speaker 1: small town from that big city because she claimed it

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Speaker 1: was time for her to live a simpler lifestyle. We

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Speaker 1: were invited to a big sixtieth birthday for one of

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Speaker 1: her friends, and we traveled to the city and got

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Speaker 1: a hotel suite. My girlfriend and I checked in, and

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Speaker 1: then she told me she was going to catch up

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Speaker 1: with her girls for a few drinks. But I didn't

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Speaker 1: see her again until two am, and she came in

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Speaker 1: trying to have sex, smelling like brown liquor. The next

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Speaker 1: day was the wedding and she felt pretty bad all day,

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Speaker 1: so I was.

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Speaker 2: Nursing her back to health.

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Speaker 1: Then it was time for the wedding and I didn't

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Speaker 1: approve of the dress my girl was trying to wear.

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Speaker 1: The sides were out and it was super tight on

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Speaker 1: her behind. I have always known her to be very

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Speaker 1: conservative and dressed like a judge. She wore that and

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Speaker 1: all night she was not the woman I've known for

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Speaker 1: two years. She was dropping it low on the dance

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Speaker 1: floor and twerking on her girls and other men. I

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Speaker 1: saw her do shots and she got buck wild. Is

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Speaker 1: this why she moved from the city. Is this how

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Speaker 1: she is by nature? Or was she just enjoying her friends.

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Speaker 1: She was doing a little bit more than just enjoying

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Speaker 1: her friends.

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Speaker 2: This is who she is, sir.

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Speaker 1: You know the saying when people show you who they are,

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Speaker 1: believe them.

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Speaker 2: Well, believe her. Okay, I know you've known her for

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Speaker 2: two years, but believe her.

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Speaker 1: Forget about what you want her to be, how you

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Speaker 1: wish she was, or the fact that she doesn't act

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Speaker 1: like our idea of what a judge is. It is

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Speaker 1: what it is. Just because you don't want to be alone,

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Speaker 1: don't settle. Okay, wait and get the kind of woman

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Speaker 1: that you really want. You want quality, you want class.

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Speaker 1: You don't want the woman who's taken shots and making

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Speaker 1: her late and come in at two a m. In

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Speaker 1: the morning and twerking all on everybody, especially other men.

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Speaker 2: I mean, that has to be out of the question.

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Speaker 1: And this is who she is and what she would

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Speaker 1: be doing if you guys were together. So you dodged

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Speaker 1: a bullet, I think, And don't worry because just like

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Speaker 1: she had to leave the big city. If she's as

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Speaker 1: wild as she said, as you say, she is. She'll

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Speaker 1: soon have to leave your little town too, because it's

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Speaker 1: small and everybody is going to know how wild she is.

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Speaker 2: And your family is right, take your time.

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Speaker 1: Fear of being alone is no excuse to rush into anything, relationship, marriage, nothing,

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Speaker 1: just because you don't want to be alone.

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Speaker 3: Steve, Wow, Doug, you're too old for this. You too

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Speaker 3: old for this and too educated for this. Damn, you're

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Speaker 3: an attorney. What was you doing just reading books? You

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Speaker 3: weren't living no life. That's what I say about A

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Speaker 3: lot of people were just really educated. They don't really

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Speaker 3: know a lot about life, you know. So I don't

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Speaker 3: put a lot of value on education, even though I'm

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Speaker 3: extremely in awe of people who can study and get

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Speaker 3: degrees and stuff like that, because that was never a

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Speaker 3: skill set I developed. So I'm not knocking that education

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Speaker 3: is a great thing. But if you putting your education

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Speaker 3: as a priority over life skills, you gonna suffer because

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Speaker 3: you need life skills every day. You don't need your

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Speaker 3: education every day. You will not need your degree every day,

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Speaker 3: but you will need some life skills. So there is

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Speaker 3: a difference. Man, it's fifty eight year old man. You

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Speaker 3: got two marriages that didn't work, and you say it

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Speaker 3: because you rusty in and didn't get to know them

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Speaker 3: because and then you don't like to be alone. Well, okay,

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Speaker 3: I cannot make it without a woman by my side.

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Speaker 3: Well you've made two statements here that's really strong. I

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Speaker 3: don't like to be alone and I can't make it

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Speaker 3: without a woman by my side. Now, I don't have

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Speaker 3: a problem with either one of them statements, but if

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Speaker 3: you were using the women to be by your side.

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Speaker 3: But I think it's more to it than that, and

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Speaker 3: I'll get to that a little bit later. I started

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Speaker 3: dating a beautiful woman after this last divorce, and your

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Speaker 3: family told you to take your time to get to

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Speaker 3: know this one right when you were about to make

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Speaker 3: the same mistake a third time. Now, let me ask you,

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Speaker 3: some dug what is wrong with you?

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Speaker 2: I get it.

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Speaker 3: I get it, man, because Lord knows, I've made my shit,

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Speaker 3: But you was finna do it again for the third time. Now,

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Speaker 3: at one point in time, man, we got to get

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Speaker 3: off the stupid word. We got to get off the

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Speaker 3: stupid merry go round because it keeps hooking back. Now

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Speaker 3: you to keep getting on the merry go round on

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Speaker 3: the same horse. Now you're gonna have to try the

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Speaker 3: pink horse or something, because you keep getting on that

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Speaker 3: blue horse and that one right there riding your ass.

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Speaker 1: Bro.

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Speaker 3: You about to make the same mistake again, but this

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Speaker 3: time the woman showed out and made you think twice

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Speaker 3: about her. Because I'm not the best judge of character.

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Speaker 3: You know why you're not the best judge of catcher.

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Speaker 3: When we come back, I'm gonna tell you all of that.

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Speaker 3: I'm gonna get a little serious with you. I wanted

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Speaker 3: to run it by you first. Well, I appreciate you did.

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Speaker 3: I'm an attorney and my girlfriend's a judge. Two educated fools.

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Speaker 3: We'll be talking about the both of them when we

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Speaker 3: come back. An attorney and a judge, and this is

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Speaker 3: what we're talking about, which will prove once again education

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Speaker 3: ain't everything.

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Speaker 2: Order in the court and the relations from one judge

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Speaker 2: to the next. Y'all come yeah, all right.

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Speaker 1: Coming up in twenty three minutes after the hour, we

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Speaker 1: will have part two of Steve's response to today's Strawberry letter.

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Speaker 1: She got buck wild on the dance floor is the subject,

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Speaker 1: and we'll get into it right after this. You're listening

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Speaker 1: hard Morning show, all right, Come on, Steve let's recap

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Speaker 1: today's Strawberry letter.

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Speaker 2: The subject she got buck wild on the dance floor.

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Speaker 1: Yeah, she did.

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Speaker 3: Fifty eight year old man and met his chick. He's

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Speaker 3: been married twice. Both of them turn out to be

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Speaker 3: not good. He rushed into him family, telling him take

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Speaker 3: his time. He says he's not a good judge character.

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Speaker 3: And he says two things in this letter. I don't

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Speaker 3: like to be alone and I cannot make it without

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Speaker 3: a woman by my side. Okay, that's an okay statement.

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Speaker 3: But you're gonna have to learn a couple of things here,

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Speaker 3: and we'll get into that anyway. He's an attorney, she's

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Speaker 3: a judge. He was about to make the mistake for

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Speaker 3: a third time. And then this girlfriend that you're dating

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Speaker 3: showed out on you. And here's what happened. Y'all live

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Speaker 3: in this small town, so you go to the city

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Speaker 3: to hang out. She recently moved to your small town

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Speaker 3: from that big city because she claimed it was time

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Speaker 3: for her to live a simpler lifestyle. Y'all got invited

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Speaker 3: to a big sixty birthday of one of her friends,

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Speaker 3: and we traveled to the city, got a hotel suite,

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Speaker 3: a girlfriend and I checked there and then she told

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Speaker 3: me she was gonna catch up with the girls for

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Speaker 3: a few drinks. I didn't see her again. At two

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Speaker 3: o'clock in the morning, she came in trying to have sex.

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Speaker 3: Smell it like brown liquor. The next day was the

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Speaker 3: wed and she felt pretty bad all day. That's called

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Speaker 3: the hangover, so I was nursing her back to help.

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Speaker 3: Then it was time for the wedding. I didn't approve

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Speaker 3: of the dress my girl was.

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Speaker 2: Trying to wear.

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Speaker 1: Well.

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Speaker 3: Now he would go, oh, now, your girl need approval

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Speaker 3: of what to wear. But you didn't approve of it,

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Speaker 3: but she wore it anyway. The sides was out, Yes,

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Speaker 3: I know the dress you're talking though. When the sides

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Speaker 3: is out, it tied up around the neck, don't it.

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Speaker 3: It's snapping the back.

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Speaker 2: Yeah, And the sides is out.

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Speaker 3: So you can't wear no braad with that dress because

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Speaker 3: they'll be looking at broad strapped. And the reason is

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Speaker 3: sides is out. It so you can get a side

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Speaker 3: view of the you.

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Speaker 2: Know, like boot they call it.

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Speaker 3: Yeah, what the headlights You can get a side view

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Speaker 3: of the headlights and hopefully there's some light showing. The

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Speaker 3: sides were out, and it was super tight on her behind,

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Speaker 3: very similar to the dress that Shirley wore to the

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Speaker 3: Hoodies that time, made by Linda Stoke with very free Yeah,

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Speaker 3: Tommy and I were thinking the same thing, very across

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Speaker 3: her behind with best Chirch wrote across her who.

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Speaker 2: Way, I did not make the dress.

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Speaker 3: And yeah, but you put it on and had all

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Speaker 3: the hoodie categories on it. And best Church was cross

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Speaker 3: her behind, which was oh so inappropriate. But everybody clapped

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Speaker 3: for the choir when she came down. Any Way, I've

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Speaker 3: always known her to be very conservative and dressed like

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Speaker 3: a judge.

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Speaker 2: She wore that.

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Speaker 3: Dress and all she was not the woman I've known

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Speaker 3: for two years. She was dropping it low on the

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Speaker 3: dance floor, tworking on her girls, tworking on other men.

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Speaker 3: I saw her do shots. She got buck wild. Is

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Speaker 3: this why she moved from the city? Is this how

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Speaker 3: she is by nature? Or was she just enjoying her friends.

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Speaker 3: You don't just start working at the club you've been

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Speaker 3: practicing back at the house. Tworking is a very unnatural movement.

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Speaker 3: You've got to work on it at the house, and

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Speaker 3: then you come out. You're talking on women and men,

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Speaker 3: and you're throwing back shots and your sides is out. Well,

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Speaker 3: here's your problem, man, here's your whole problem. You're bad

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Speaker 3: with judgment, your old ass need to learn how to

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Speaker 3: be alone, you really do. And see, the reason that

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Speaker 3: you don't like to be alone is because you don't

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Speaker 3: know you. See, people who don't like being by is

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Speaker 3: because they're uncomfortable with themselves. So they need other people

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Speaker 3: to activate things in them, other people to to talk

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Speaker 3: to them. And the reason you're uncomfortable is as because

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Speaker 3: you don't know you.

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Speaker 2: Your old ass.

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Speaker 3: Before you get any older, you need to spend some

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Speaker 3: time with yourself so you can know you. And the

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Speaker 3: reason that you keep needing other people to complete you

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Speaker 3: that that's why you need other people to complete you,

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Speaker 3: because you don't know you. So now the judgment is

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Speaker 3: impaired with people because you're not sure of who you are.

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Speaker 3: And in that right there lies your whole dilemma. So

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Speaker 3: now says you don't know who you are, You don't

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Speaker 3: really know what's good for you because you can't stand

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Speaker 3: to be alone, and you got to have a woman

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Speaker 3: by your side. People who require other people for stimulation

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Speaker 3: justification when you need somebody to define you and help

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Speaker 3: you have a good time you're in trouble, Oh dude,

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Speaker 3: you need to go somewhere and sit down and learn how.

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Speaker 2: To enjoy yourself and be by yourself.

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Speaker 3: That's what you need to do because until then, you're

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Speaker 3: not going to ever be a pick nobody for yourself.

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Speaker 3: And she is just who she showed you. Yes, this

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Speaker 3: aint the first time she didn't him.

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Speaker 2: And that's why she had to leave the big city.

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Speaker 3: But everybody know her. Yeah, I got to get out

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Speaker 3: of here because I'm just tripping.

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Speaker 1: Can you imagine Judge Judy or Judge may Blean or

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Speaker 1: you know, some of our respects.

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Speaker 2: Yes, nothing, just come on Judge, Steve, Judge Steve. Yeah, wow,

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Speaker 2: all right, that's crazy. You know what.

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Speaker 1: Leave us your comments on Today's Strawberry Letter on Instagram

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Speaker 1: at Steve Barbi Fm and check out the Strawberry Letter

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Speaker 1: podcast on iHeart Radio and coming up next it is

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Speaker 1: Junior and Sports Talk. Right after this, you're listening Stave

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Speaker 1: Harvey Morning Show