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Speaker 1: All right, guys, time now for today's Strawberry Letter. And

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Speaker 1: if you need advice and relationships, dating, work, sex, parenting,

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Speaker 1: and more, please submit your Strawberry Letter to Steve RBFM

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Speaker 1: dot com and click submit Strawberry Letter. Because here it is,

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Speaker 1: right here. We could be reading your letter all right,

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Speaker 1: live and on the ear, just like we're reading this

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Speaker 1: one right here, right now, right here, right now. Buckle

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Speaker 1: up and hold on tight. We got it pot you

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Speaker 1: Here it is the Strawberry Letter, all right. Subject, I'm

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Speaker 1: in love with the Devil. Dear Stephen Shirley. I've been

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Speaker 1: married for exactly one year to the devil. My husband

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Speaker 1: is an IT manager and I'm a veterinarian. I celebrated

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Speaker 1: our one year anniversary and then I went to visit

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Speaker 1: my parents for the weekend. My visit was cut short

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Speaker 1: when I got a call from my neighbor saying there

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Speaker 1: were a lot of cars at my house and she

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Speaker 1: knew I was out of town. It was one am

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Speaker 1: when I got the call, so I did not bother

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Speaker 1: to call my husband. I knew something wasn't so I

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Speaker 1: drove home. It was a two hour drive, so I

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Speaker 1: got there around three thirty am. And I parked in

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Speaker 1: front of my neighbor's house. I walked in my front

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Speaker 1: door because the garage was down. I saw bottles of

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Speaker 1: alcohol and a little weed on the coffee table, and

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Speaker 1: my hand started shaking. As I walked towards my bedroom,

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Speaker 1: I got my bat out of the hall closet because

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Speaker 1: I knew something wasn't right. I saw my husband and

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Speaker 1: two other women asleep in my bed. The women, wait,

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Speaker 1: that's not even the worst part. One of the women

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Speaker 1: was my best friend. I tapped each one of them

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Speaker 1: with the bat so they would wake up. I love

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Speaker 1: that my husband jumped up first and tried to take

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Speaker 1: the bat from me. My best friend woke up, and

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Speaker 1: I hid her in the back of her knees as

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Speaker 1: she tried to run to the bathroom, to my bathroom.

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Speaker 1: She was the only one I wanted to hurt because

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Speaker 1: she was my maid of honor in my wedding. There

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Speaker 1: is no way I'd ever believe my husband would do

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Speaker 1: me like this. My best friend is engaged to be married,

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Speaker 1: so I called her fiance right away and ruined her plans.

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Speaker 1: I'm most upset with my husband, and I kept asking

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Speaker 1: him why he chose my best friend. He said it

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Speaker 1: was her oral skills that got him hooked months ago.

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Speaker 1: He admitted, it's been going on for a while and

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Speaker 1: she's better than me in bed. This hurt me to

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Speaker 1: my core. He's the devil and I want revenge. What

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Speaker 1: should I do? Oh, it's all nothing. Well, you've done

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Speaker 1: a lot. I love you getting the bat, I love that.

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Speaker 1: I love you calling her fiance and ruining her wedding.

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Speaker 1: But honestly, I'm not your revenge type of girl, okay,

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Speaker 1: because life always has a way of paying you back

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Speaker 1: for your wrongs. It just does. That's just how it goes.

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Speaker 1: But let me say, like I said, it was a

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Speaker 1: smooth move calling her fiance. That was some good revenge

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Speaker 1: right there. Now. If I were a revenge type of girl,

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Speaker 1: I would have taken her clothes and made her leave

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Speaker 1: my house. But you know what, naked, I would have

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Speaker 1: taken pictures of all three of them in my bed.

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Speaker 1: I would have sent them to her fiance and her

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Speaker 1: family and his family. Then I would have sent pictures

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Speaker 1: to her boss and all of her co workers. Then

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Speaker 1: I would have posted them all over social media with

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Speaker 1: the hashtag husband stealing STD carrying blank. I would have

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Speaker 1: downloaded Shirley Murdoch's song As We Lay, But I would

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Speaker 1: have put that with a picture, you know, the picture

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Speaker 1: up there with the song under it. All. I would

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Speaker 1: have done all of this. Let me see, did I

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Speaker 1: leave anything out? Oh? I would have gone to her church,

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Speaker 1: told her pastor and the whole congregation. Oh. I would

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Speaker 1: go to the hair salon, because you know they tell everything.

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Speaker 1: I would have gone to the hair salon where she

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Speaker 1: gets her hair done. I would have told everyone there

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Speaker 1: she's sleeping with all of her husbands. She got some

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Speaker 1: sort of nasty disease that she's spreading, so they better

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Speaker 1: go to the doctor immediately. Um. And of course I

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Speaker 1: would tell all her other girlfriends so they could light

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Speaker 1: her up, tell her how stink she is. But then again,

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Speaker 1: I'm not your revenge type of girl. So were you

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Speaker 1: so started eight who? You had a lot that you

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Speaker 1: did not do, Shirley, I'm not your revenge. You know.

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Speaker 1: I'm not a revenge Now you're not into that. You're

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Speaker 1: a nice person personally. I can agree with Shirley. But

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Speaker 1: here's where I disagree. It's like the movie. The five

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Speaker 1: heartbeams quote in the movie is just saying about you

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Speaker 1: j T, which means just letting yell that damn party.

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Speaker 1: You wouldn't even invited to the damned party. Why you

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Speaker 1: want you? Just ain't got nothing to do with you.

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Speaker 1: Why do you want to go out somebody a party,

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Speaker 1: swinging a batting and everything. I'm sure just ain't what

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Speaker 1: he had planned when he put a party together. Yes,

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Speaker 1: but y'all later on, my wife gonna come in here

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Speaker 1: with a back and beat hell out of every damn body.

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Speaker 1: He wouldn't have had people there, and he put that

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Speaker 1: on the invitation. Just ain't about you. You're gonna come

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Speaker 1: in the room and make this about you. It wasn't

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Speaker 1: about you. Just ain't got nothing to do with you

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Speaker 1: and mess up up. The man had it all plan.

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Speaker 1: You're the hard it is to get a free over

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Speaker 1: two free landing. That's all right, I'm scheduling ya. Thank you.

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Speaker 1: I'll tell you what so you know I read the letter.

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Speaker 1: You know I will say that we need to start.

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Speaker 1: Did you sound like a serving at church time? It

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Speaker 1: could be well, but let's thank God for nosing names,

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Speaker 1: They nosing neighbors. I keep you in a situation you

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Speaker 1: ain't got to be in long. It's only one year.

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Speaker 1: You still get out this marriage. It one fourth and

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Speaker 1: you know the end. Something motent girl. I don't mean

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Speaker 1: to call you this late for this show with a

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Speaker 1: lot of activ at y'all have all that music loud

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Speaker 1: over there. Hold on, we'll have part two of today's

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Speaker 1: Strawberry Letter, I'm in Love with the Devil, at twenty

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Speaker 1: three minutes after. Right after this, you're listening to Steve

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Speaker 1: Harvey Morning Show. All right, guys, let's recap today's Strawberry Letter.

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Speaker 1: The subject I'm in Love with the Devil. A woman

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Speaker 1: wrote in she's been married for exactly one year. She says,

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Speaker 1: she's been married to the devil. They have a good marriage.

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Speaker 1: She's a veterinarian. Her husband's an it manager. They just

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Speaker 1: celebrated their one year anniversary. The wife celebrated, then she

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Speaker 1: went to visit her parents, which was about a two

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Speaker 1: hour drive away. While she was there, her neighbor called

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Speaker 1: and said there were a lot of cars at her house.

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Speaker 1: She knew she was out of town. So the wife said, Okay,

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Speaker 1: I'm not going to call my husband. Something doesn't feel right.

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Speaker 1: I'm just gonna go home because this is like one

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Speaker 1: o'clock in the morning. So she drives home, sees weed

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Speaker 1: on the coffee table, bottles of alcohol everywhere. She parked

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Speaker 1: in front of her neighbor's house so nobody saw her

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Speaker 1: come in. She went right in through the front door,

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Speaker 1: her husband as she went into the bedroom. But before

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Speaker 1: she did that, she stopped at the closet to get

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Speaker 1: a bat because she didn't know what she was going

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Speaker 1: to run into. So when she got to the bedroom,

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Speaker 1: she saw her husband asleep with two women. One of

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Speaker 1: the women was her best friend, and she hit that

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Speaker 1: woman in the back of her knees with the bat

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Speaker 1: because she was upset with her, especially because she was

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Speaker 1: the bridesmaid. She was the maid of honor and her wedding,

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Speaker 1: so of course she had to get hit. Then, you know,

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Speaker 1: her husband woke up and tried to explain and tried

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Speaker 1: to take the bat from her and all of that,

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Speaker 1: and the best friend was engaged to be married, so

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Speaker 1: she called her fiance and ruined all of that. But

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Speaker 1: she said, of course, she's most upset with her husband,

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Speaker 1: and her husband told her why he did what he

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Speaker 1: did because her husband, her best friend's earl game got

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Speaker 1: him hooked, and she's better in bed than his wife.

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Speaker 1: She said, it hurt her to the core, and she

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Speaker 1: wants revenge. What should she do? I said, I'm not

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Speaker 1: a revenge type of girl, but I gave her a

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Speaker 1: couple of suggestions, but I'm not into revenge. You know.

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Speaker 1: Jay said, it wasn't about her as the wife. And

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Speaker 1: of course you said, and this sounds like a sermon. Yeah,

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Speaker 1: And the title is what junior, thank God for nosing neighbors. Right,

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Speaker 1: that's all I can tell you, Thank God for nosing neighbors,

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Speaker 1: because you know, the nosing neighbors saw the people going

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Speaker 1: in the house. Jack. You know, she said something. You know,

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Speaker 1: your cousin show look nice? Where your wife fast? You know?

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Speaker 1: She said? Then she went and made the phone call.

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Speaker 1: And here you come home at three thirty in the morning.

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Speaker 1: But you want to know about what revenge? Well, I

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Speaker 1: noticed you's a veterinarian, which means you got access to animals. Well,

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Speaker 1: since since since he like cats and stuff, let's go

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Speaker 1: ahead put these lines in here. Let's get these tigers

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Speaker 1: in this house and let them rong round. So where

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Speaker 1: he coming. Now, let's see how you do with this, tyger.

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Speaker 1: Let's see how you do with this to this line.

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Speaker 1: Let's see how you're gonna do with You got access

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Speaker 1: to animal political rilla, and now we're gonna see who

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Speaker 1: gonna be who chest first. Then you can go ahead

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Speaker 1: and get reved like this, Get you somebody and go

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Speaker 1: out of town with and then you'll show who that

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Speaker 1: is you with. You just post body parts like an arm.

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Speaker 1: That's he sees you with, somebody with all. Then you

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Speaker 1: see somebody with a chest, and y'all out on the beach.

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Speaker 1: See that's how you get your reven. Now he at

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Speaker 1: home crying worried about what you doing, then get the divorce.

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Speaker 1: I ain't gonna just stay there. Can I pick it back? That? Yeah,

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Speaker 1: since we then wrote the same damn thing, let me

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Speaker 1: figured back that you are a veterinarian. You got access

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Speaker 1: to animals, so you are snakes ought to be in

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Speaker 1: his car when he on his way to work in

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Speaker 1: the morning, as soon as he get on the pedal.

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Speaker 1: He ought to be snakes running everywhere when he come

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Speaker 1: on an evening, kangaroo in the garage. Kick it ain't

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Speaker 1: you gotta ki you are You're a veterinarian, baby. You

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Speaker 1: got access to everything, possums, possums in the bathroom as

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Speaker 1: soon as he come up in the three up. He

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Speaker 1: can't handle it. You got to put this pressure on me.

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Speaker 1: And if you really, when you really upset them pit bulls,

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Speaker 1: it's gonna do the work that's gonna I really don't,

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Speaker 1: I really don't, really don't, suggested pit bull. That's like

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Speaker 1: a little bit too far. You don't want to do that,

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Speaker 1: But I stricken back. You won't put that in the back,

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Speaker 1: y'all put these animals on his ass. You the same

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Speaker 1: way Moses did back in the day. You ought to

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Speaker 1: be just letting loose. Pigs is good. Pigs is real good.

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Speaker 1: Don't forget the dunk. Scunks could work skunks. It's gonna

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Speaker 1: be funky, but it's gonna be it's gonna be nice,

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Speaker 1: all right. Help just he's I don't know what. I

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Speaker 1: don't know what noises skunks make up. They don't have

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Speaker 1: to make no noise. When you got that kind of fume,

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Speaker 1: you don't need to make no no The smell is

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Speaker 1: once loud, you don't have to make I like animal noises. Stuff. Well,

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Speaker 1: when the tail, that's it. When they hit you with that,

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Speaker 1: it's old you anywhere you hear that, boy, your ever

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Speaker 1: hit a stuff by mistake you. That's something you never forget. Man,

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Speaker 1: I'm coming in. Wow, has that happened to you? That's

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Speaker 1: never happened to me? Yeah, you Oh my god. It

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Speaker 1: takes weeks. Is a normal thing. Not only does it stink,

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Speaker 1: it makes you itch. It's all your body. Yeah, you

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Speaker 1: deal it all what you're supposed to bathe and you're

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Speaker 1: supposed to bathe in something that was killing us, made us. Yeah,

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Speaker 1: take the smell off and the itch out. And if

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Speaker 1: you don't have no tomatoes, just put some ragu in

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Speaker 1: there and rug that on. And if the water's not enough,

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Speaker 1: throw some pot you might well cook somewhere. You get

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Speaker 1: it out. Yeah, forget it all right, guys, Thank you

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Speaker 1: all um. Please post your comments on today's Strawberry Letter

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Speaker 1: at Steve Harvey FM on Instagram and Facebook, and check

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Speaker 1: out the Strawberry Letter potcast on demand now. Or you

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Speaker 1: might have your own response. You might want to help

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Speaker 1: her out with your own form of revenge for this woman.

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Speaker 1: She said she's married to the devil. She wants revenge.

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Speaker 1: Help her out, all right. Coming up at forty six

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Speaker 1: minutes after the hour, Junior is here. He'll have Sports

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Speaker 1: Talk Sports Talk with Junior coming up. Right after this,

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Speaker 1: you're listening to the Stave Harvey Morning Show.