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Speaker 1: Hey, this is Sam. This is John, your og Okay

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Speaker 1: storytime podcast host, and we got some delicious, juicy stories

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Speaker 1: coming up.

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Speaker 2: But if you want to hear that deliciousness, you know,

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Speaker 2: just stick around for a two minute break with a

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Speaker 2: word from our sponsors.

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Speaker 1: My parents gave me an inheritance.

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Speaker 2: But I chose to throw it away, throwing all the

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Speaker 2: money in the trash.

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Speaker 1: There is a trigger warning here for verbal. Six years ago,

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Speaker 1: my father came to me and offered to buy me

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Speaker 1: a house, advising that due to my situation then I

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Speaker 1: would never be able to afford one on my own.

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Speaker 1: My now wife and I were creative university students renting

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Speaker 1: in a poorly constructed mid century cottage. By the way,

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Speaker 1: this comes from user dry text forty two seventy seven.

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Speaker 1: And I'm Dakota, I'm Carly, and we are here to

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Speaker 1: give you good advice goofy, despite how many rashes we have.

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Speaker 1: But we don't have all the answers. But we only

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Speaker 1: know what we'd do. If you do something different, just

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Speaker 1: let us know in the comments. Originally the plan was

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Speaker 1: to build a small dwelling on the family farm, but

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Speaker 1: all parties thought that was a poor choice, so we

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Speaker 1: chose a different path. My father advised that the house

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Speaker 1: he proposed to buy would be my inheritance. He would

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Speaker 1: put money into the deposit and buy it for me

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Speaker 1: and my wife, and we would pay off the remaining mortgage,

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Speaker 1: council rates, and associated bills. Further to this, we would

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Speaker 1: need to buy out the remainder of the mortgage from

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Speaker 1: him prior to his retirement. He was fifty at the

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Speaker 1: time and the planned retirement age was sixty. We came

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Speaker 1: to an agreement on what type of house we were

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Speaker 1: looking for, with the belief that this would be the

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Speaker 1: only house I would be able to own, and for

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Speaker 1: what price he was happy to pay. My mother then

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Speaker 1: added the caveat that in order for her to accept

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Speaker 1: this arrangement, my wife and I would need to save

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Speaker 1: ten k within twelve months for them to trust our

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Speaker 1: ability to pay bills. I earned twenty four K and

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Speaker 1: my wife less, and we had creeping rent prices to pay,

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Speaker 1: not to mention the bills. Regardless, we got to July

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Speaker 1: and had saved four thousand when we found a small

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Speaker 1: cottage that we thought was perfect. It was close to

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Speaker 1: my wife's elderly parents, who were a large part of

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Speaker 1: our lives and had a direct route to the city

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Speaker 1: and was one hundred and thirty thousand dollars cheaper than

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Speaker 1: what my father wanted to spend. It wasn't the prettiest

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Speaker 1: and Dad suspected some sheets in the roof might be asbestos,

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Speaker 1: but he was happy to get a building inspector to

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Speaker 1: verify this. I was happy to get it. My mother

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Speaker 1: decided it was not in their interest to pursue the house,

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Speaker 1: as we had yet to save the ten k and

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Speaker 1: they would be unable to flip it if anything went wrong.

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Speaker 1: In fairness, Dad had looked at two houses that fit

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Speaker 1: into my wife's and I criteria, and both times they

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Speaker 1: had fallen through. It was at this moment, when my

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Speaker 1: mother refused to compromise with what we were looking for

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Speaker 1: or trust that we were halfway to meeting our goal,

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Speaker 1: that it really spelled out that they wanted something different

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Speaker 1: to us. We looked at more market friendly houses from

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Speaker 1: then on, and Dad, believing us about our savings, got

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Speaker 1: pre approval and thus started a countdown. By September, one

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Speaker 1: house had stayed on the market in the small village

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Speaker 1: next to my parents' farm. It was an hour away

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Speaker 1: for my wife's family and over an hour and a

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Speaker 1: half from the city where we both worked. We had

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Speaker 1: not given it any serious thought in the months prior,

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Speaker 1: and neither of us wanted to live that far away

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Speaker 1: from everything. There was a house opening one weekend and

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Speaker 1: Dad was pressuring us with the pre approval end date.

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Speaker 1: We agreed to go, but just a few days before

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Speaker 1: our car broke down, leaving us unable to travel out

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Speaker 1: from the city to have a look at the house.

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Speaker 1: I called my dad after going over the listing and

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Speaker 1: advised that he had our permission to go ahead if

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Speaker 1: he liked it. What followed was a torrent of verbal

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Speaker 1: or the phone, telling me he didn't need our permission

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Speaker 1: to spend his money, along with horrific and personal insults

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Speaker 1: that came out of nowhere. My father often flies off

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Speaker 1: the handle when stressed and takes it out on those

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Speaker 1: around him, but this was particularly bad. I was shocked,

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Speaker 1: as it wasmpletely the opposite of what he had been

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Speaker 1: saying for the past year. Further to this, my wife

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Speaker 1: and I had been subsisting on beans and whatever I

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Speaker 1: could cook cheaply for the past nine months to save

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Speaker 1: enough to make my mother happy. I responded with anger

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Speaker 1: and raged against him, ending the argument with a firm

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Speaker 1: no to the house and any help he had to offer.

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Speaker 1: That was the first time I turned him down. He

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Speaker 1: bought the house that weekend, regardless. I promised my wife

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Speaker 1: I would never get into an argument like that again.

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Speaker 1: We spent our savings on things we desperately needed and

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Speaker 1: had our real estate agent begging us to sign up

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Speaker 1: for a long term lease in an old cottage in

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Speaker 1: a nice part of town. I had started to earn more,

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Speaker 1: and both my wife and I felt a great release

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Speaker 1: when turning down my father. We did not speak to

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Speaker 1: them for weeks, but slowly both parents began pressuring me

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Speaker 1: to take up their offer, and I turned them down.

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Speaker 1: Good for you, nice, Yeah, And now they're going to

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Speaker 1: start sweating.

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Speaker 2: They're like, wait, yeah, he's wait'stantly turning us down.

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Speaker 1: Oh wait, you're making more money now, and you're renting

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Speaker 1: a place that you really like, and now we're gonna

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Speaker 1: have to flip this house that you told us you

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Speaker 1: didn't want. Oh oh, so now we just we just

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Speaker 1: bought a huge responsibility for ourselves.

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Speaker 2: I love though, that after the first time that they

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Speaker 2: said no, they're like, oh, my god, we can do this.

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Speaker 2: And then they just got to keep saying no, and

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Speaker 2: like have that like moment of oh, my god, we

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Speaker 2: can do this.

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Speaker 1: Yeah, are you sure you don't want to buy You

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Speaker 1: don't want this house? No, Dad, guy, don't I don't

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Speaker 1: want it. You can have it.

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Speaker 3: Oh, it's like, well, I don't want the house either.

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Speaker 4: House kind of sucks.

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Speaker 1: How do I Maybe if I yell at him some more,

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Speaker 1: he'll take the house. Then my fourteen year old brother called,

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Speaker 1: saying he wanted more of a relationship with me and

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Speaker 1: felt he would not have that if we continued to

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Speaker 1: live in the city. Later he would confess that my

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Speaker 1: mother had directed him to say this, which is exactly

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Speaker 1: what I expected. But I knew back then that my

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Speaker 1: parents were threatening the relationship with my siblings over this matter.

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Speaker 1: We moved into the house in November, and shortly after

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Speaker 1: it became pregnant. We slowly changed the house to our

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Speaker 1: tastes and took out a loan to renovate the lighting

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Speaker 1: and for paint. We also used half of the loan

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Speaker 1: to buy a second car. In the next five years,

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Speaker 1: I quadrupled my wage as I became a public servant,

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Speaker 1: understanding it to be the most stable career path for

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Speaker 1: my new family. Cost of living crisis grew, the VID came,

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Speaker 1: and all the while I paid for every bill and

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Speaker 1: rate increase they asked for. My mother called our place

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Speaker 1: their rental, and despite getting married in the back garden

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Speaker 1: and raising my son there, it failed to feel like home.

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Speaker 2: Yeah, probably because someone else is sitting there going, And

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Speaker 2: don't forget this is our house, yeah, not yours, And.

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Speaker 1: Don't forget who made this possible. As life became more expensive,

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Speaker 1: my wife's and my wages spread more thinly. We were

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Speaker 1: unable to save, and as such I was living in

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Speaker 1: a house I could not buy from my father. Last October,

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Speaker 1: my mother asked us to pay a further bill on

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Speaker 1: top of our usual load the building insurance for the year,

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Speaker 1: which came to one thousand dollars. I had paid all

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Speaker 1: bills on time and had never quibbled over the price

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Speaker 1: up until this point. My engine had blown two months prior,

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Speaker 1: and my replacement wiped three and a half thousand out

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Speaker 1: of our back pocket. The bill was due in November

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Speaker 1: and I had locked all our bills in up to Christmas,

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Speaker 1: so I was a bit put out. Still, I agreed

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Speaker 1: to pay it, asked if it could be split into

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Speaker 1: four payments, and my mother agreed. Christmas came and I

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Speaker 1: found out my sister owed them five thousand in car

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Speaker 1: repairs and they were selling their last rental in the UK.

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Speaker 1: They were stressed, and Mom wanted a family chat to

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Speaker 1: basically say they could not afford to keep bailing out

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Speaker 1: their four children. I agreed with the idea, and some

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Speaker 1: further context. My father was building a three hundred thousand

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Speaker 1: dollars shed house on the farm for my younger brother,

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Speaker 1: who had consistently turned the offer down. The caveat here

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Speaker 1: was that my brother would pay off the mortgage on

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Speaker 1: the family farm and then split it with our youngest

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Speaker 1: sister when she was older, while Dad built a further

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Speaker 1: shed house for himself and Mom in retirement. This would

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Speaker 1: saddle my brother with more than a million dollars in

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Speaker 1: debt by the age of thirty. What kind of deal

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Speaker 1: is that.

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Speaker 3: Yeah, I'll build you a little shed out in the back,

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Speaker 3: but you have to pay off the whole farm mortgage,

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Speaker 3: and I'm going to build another house that I will

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Speaker 3: live in, and then you have to split it with

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Speaker 3: your sister.

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Speaker 1: It sounds like really, the reality is is that the

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Speaker 1: parents can't afford home ownership or I guess farm ownership,

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Speaker 1: and they're like, I know how to afford this. We'll

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Speaker 1: just make our children pay for it, and we'll.

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Speaker 2: Say the main house and live in a shed that's

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Speaker 2: probably a really nice house.

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Speaker 1: Yeah, I'm assuming that it's just they say they're saying shed,

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Speaker 1: but it's just like a whole other building. Yeah, that's crazy.

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Speaker 1: Before the family meeting could occur, my father belittled me

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Speaker 1: over the split insurance built. He couldn't understand how someone

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Speaker 1: in their thirties didn't have a thousand dollars on hand.

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Speaker 1: My son was in the next room, and I could

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Speaker 1: see my father wanted an argument, so I attempted to

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Speaker 1: leave twice. My father denied me the opportunity as we

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Speaker 1: had six years before, and we got into an argument,

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Speaker 1: this time over the cost of living in differences in generations.

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Speaker 1: It ended with him screaming at me that we had

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Speaker 1: six months to leave our house.

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Speaker 2: I just can't believe this, Dad.

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Speaker 1: Yeah, this is a I don't know.

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Speaker 2: How dare you not want to go into dead at thirty?

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Speaker 1: Dad? Landlord is not a great not a great vibe. Dad, lord.

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Speaker 1: We had paid over one hundred thousand into the mortgage

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Speaker 1: and council rates, two thousand on the lights, and more

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Speaker 1: for the paint. I had landscaped the garden with rare

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Speaker 1: native plants, and was looking at building decks and renovating

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Speaker 1: the shed into a studio. All of it was gone.

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Speaker 1: Over six hundred and seventy four dollars. We had paid

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Speaker 1: off part of the original bill, along with the stability

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Speaker 1: of my family. I called mom to clarify if Dad

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Speaker 1: was serious, and she advised study was not. He was

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Speaker 1: just angry. We waited three months to talk to them,

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Speaker 1: for me to calm down, and finally I came to

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Speaker 1: the conclusion to leave. My friends and other family members

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Speaker 1: and my wife had all questioned our situation over the years,

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Speaker 1: seeing it as basically just paying off my parents' mortgage.

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Speaker 1: There was no written contract, and my mother had only

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Speaker 1: recently stopped calling our house her rental. Still, I defended

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Speaker 1: my father's words for those years, and because of this

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Speaker 1: I was left without a leg to stand on. And

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Speaker 1: we have a little bit more story left here. But yeah,

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Speaker 1: would you leave this house. I'm getting out of this place.

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Speaker 2: I don't want to deal with this the second that

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Speaker 2: I turned thirty, is gonna be like, give me four

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Speaker 2: thousand dollars.

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Speaker 1: If there's literally no written agreements, how are you going

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Speaker 1: to enforce any Like you're just banking on this person

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Speaker 1: to just hand it to you when it's done, and

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Speaker 1: I'm sure the goalposts will be moved again. You go, oh, yeah,

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Speaker 1: you've paid it, but now you have to pay rent

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Speaker 1: and every month and it's still not yours. And once

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Speaker 1: I pass away, I'll give it to you in my will.

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Speaker 4: That's what it feels like.

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Speaker 1: It like, I thought this was supposed to be so

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Speaker 1: iked so that we could have a house, not so

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Speaker 1: that you could have a house that we live in.

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Speaker 1: You know, well, let's finish this story. I told my

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Speaker 1: parents we were leaving, and they seem surprised, then concerned,

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Speaker 1: then happy our house had doubled in price and they

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Speaker 1: could start charging more for renters. Dad, it often bemoaned,

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Speaker 1: he was not charging what he could rent with us.

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Speaker 1: So I suppose it worked out perfectly for them. I've

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Speaker 1: just exposed my small family to the crazy housing crisis

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Speaker 1: that is dominating Australia at the moment. My elderly in

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Speaker 1: laws have taken us in and we plan on saving

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Speaker 1: as much as possible to afford a house in the

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Speaker 1: next two years. With current prices the way they are,

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Speaker 1: I'm unsure if we can keep up. So am I

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Speaker 1: the ale for forsaking my inheritance and my family's stability.

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Speaker 1: And that is the end of that story.

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Speaker 2: My wife is upset because I let our daughter watch

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Speaker 2: a horror movie, The Horror, The Horror. I forties male,

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Speaker 2: have three kids, all girls. We are going to my

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Speaker 2: brother's wedding soon. My oldest is twelve. Anne was upset

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Speaker 2: that she's going as a guest while her sister's six

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Speaker 2: and eight get to be flower girls, which she's never been.

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Speaker 2: By the way, this comes from Desperate Dad fifty seven

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Speaker 2: sixty three. And if you want us to make your

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Speaker 2: own stories, go to the rsash okay storytime subreddit. I'm Carly,

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Speaker 2: I'm Dakota, I'm Keon, and we're here to give good advice.

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Speaker 4: Goofully.

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Speaker 2: But we don't have all the answers. We only know

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Speaker 2: what we would do, so let us know what you

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Speaker 2: would do. In the comments, an Opie says we've been

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Speaker 2: trying to find something nice for Leo Toware, but she

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Speaker 2: has not been enjoying.

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Speaker 4: The dress shopping process.

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Speaker 2: Someone suggested we do something fun afterward as a reward,

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Speaker 2: like going out for lunch, taking a friend, or seeing

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Speaker 2: a movie. Her friends are out of town, so I

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Speaker 2: suggested we go shopping first and then see a movie.

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Speaker 2: Got the dress and headed to the theater. Leah wanted

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Speaker 2: to watch Twenty eight years later. It is R rated,

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Speaker 2: and I was not really okay with her watching something

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Speaker 2: like that.

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Speaker 5: I suggested Superman, Lilla and Stitch, or taking a rain

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Speaker 5: check and watching Fantastic Four, but she was set on

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Speaker 5: twenty eight years later, I figured why not.

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Speaker 2: I watched R rated movies when I was her age.

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Speaker 2: The only person who would have an issue with it

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Speaker 2: was her mom, and she was working, so we went well.

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Speaker 2: My wife found out and she is furious. She says

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Speaker 2: it was irresponsible of me to let Leo watch that

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Speaker 2: movie and that we should.

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Speaker 4: Have done something else.

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Speaker 2: Her stance is that I should have guided us toward

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Speaker 2: a more appropriate activity instead of just going along.

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Speaker 4: With Leah's choice. I don't agree.

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Speaker 2: First, the movie was the incentive that got Leah to

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Speaker 2: agree to dress shopping without a meltdown. Second, since she

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Speaker 2: is too old to be a Flower Girl and already

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Speaker 2: feels left out. I figured she deserved to do something

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Speaker 2: more grown up, and she handled the movie fine.

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Speaker 4: She actually loved it.

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Speaker 2: But my wife thinks it was all a bribe and

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Speaker 2: says I should not have done it. Honestly, if it

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Speaker 2: was that big a deal, maybe she should have taken

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Speaker 2: Leah's shopping herself.

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Speaker 4: But I'm rambling.

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Speaker 2: Am I the a hole for taking my daughter to

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Speaker 2: twenty eight years later as a reward for cooperating with

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Speaker 2: shopping for the wedding? And I'm getting a lot of

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Speaker 2: comments about whether it was okay to let her watch

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Speaker 2: an R rated movie without her mom's input.

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Speaker 4: Here is my side of the story.

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Speaker 2: My wife did try taking Leah dress shopping before, and

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Speaker 2: it ended in a huge fight. Lea did not like

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Speaker 2: the clothes her mom picked and did not want to

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Speaker 2: go to the wedding at all. A friend suggested using

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Speaker 2: a reward to make the whole process smoother, hence the movie.

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Speaker 2: The deal was, if we could find an outfit Leah

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Speaker 2: could wear without complaint, we would go to the movie's

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Speaker 2: her choice. I honestly thought she would pick How to

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Speaker 2: Train Your Dragon or Superman. I did not expect twenty

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Speaker 2: eight years later, some people said I should have taken

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Speaker 2: her home when she would not choose a different movie.

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Speaker 2: I think that would have been counterproductive. What kind of

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Speaker 2: message would that send? We picked out a dress you

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Speaker 2: do not like and will probably donate after the wedding,

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Speaker 2: and now, since you won't pick a different movie, we're

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Speaker 2: going home. That would have made everything worse. Besides, I

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Speaker 2: watched worse when I was a kid. We do not

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Speaker 2: normally watch horror. I love them, but my wife is

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Speaker 2: a lot stricter with what the kids see. Most of

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Speaker 2: what we watch is the House of Mouse House a

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Speaker 2: shrik Or family films. As for the movie itself, Lea

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Speaker 2: genuinely enjoyed it. On the way home we had a

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Speaker 2: great talk. She had never seen twenty eight days later,

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Speaker 2: so I filled her in on the background. So I

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Speaker 2: filled her in on the background. The only part she

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Speaker 2: found upsetting was the storyline involving the mom, but that

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Speaker 2: is likely tied to her recently losing a classmate. We

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Speaker 2: talked to about how that part must have felt for

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Speaker 2: the kid in the movie he is her age, and

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Speaker 2: what it must have been like for both the character

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Speaker 2: and the actor. She has not had any nightmares. But

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Speaker 2: I am planning to check in with her again to

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Speaker 2: make sure she is still feeling okay, and we have

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Speaker 2: an update nineteen days later, not twenty eight.

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Speaker 1: The real problem in this story is that, yeah, that

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Speaker 1: he didn't discuss with his wife and problems, not that

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Speaker 1: it doesn't seem like he can. Yeah, like you should

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Speaker 1: be able to be like, no, we're not doing that.

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Speaker 1: And then even if they're like you need to be like,

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Speaker 1: it's still not happening.

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Speaker 2: You just don't present the R rated movie option up front.

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Speaker 2: She'd be like, hey, look at all over.

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Speaker 1: I mean that's there's posters. You know. She sees a poster,

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Speaker 1: she goes, I want to see that one, and then

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Speaker 1: it's like.

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Speaker 4: It's not out yet or yeah, we're just.

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Speaker 1: Not She's not five, she can tell what's the posters

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Speaker 1: just up.

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Speaker 4: It might not have a date.

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Speaker 1: They always had the date at the botto we live,

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Speaker 1: like right next to the Sony Pictures and they had

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Speaker 1: like the giants, it had the date like right on

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Speaker 1: the bottom.

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Speaker 2: Okay, and that's a Sony Pictures in LA. They might

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Speaker 2: not live there.

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Speaker 1: No, I'm just saying that the poster anyway, it doesn't matter.

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Speaker 1: You just need to be able to, first of all,

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Speaker 1: discuss with your wife and tell your kid no, regardless

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Speaker 1: of if they had, because you're just teaching your kid

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Speaker 1: that if they like have a meltdown, they get whatever

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Speaker 1: they want. That's not good at all. It's not good. Yeah,

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Speaker 1: and it's just not how life works.

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Speaker 2: I feel like he just wanted to see it, so

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Speaker 2: he didn't even argue it at all. Update nineteen days later,

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Speaker 2: I had a lot of comments reassuring me that I

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Speaker 2: did not do anything wrong. That felt like a relief.

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Speaker 2: I am an eighties kid, and I had watched movies

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Speaker 2: like Alien Terminator, Child's Play, Friday the Thirteenth by the

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Speaker 2: time I was Leah's age. Good to know others got

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Speaker 2: to share those experiences, because sometimes it feels like she

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Speaker 2: does not get to experience that freedom I got to

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Speaker 2: enjoy growing up. My wife was pissed about the movie.

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Speaker 2: She grew up in a more conservative household and did

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Speaker 2: not watch her first R rated movies into she was

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Speaker 2: in her twenties. Her concern was that Leah had never

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Speaker 2: seen a movie like twenty eight years later, and pointed

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Speaker 2: out how scary the trailer and advertisements were. She was

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Speaker 2: afraid she would get nightmares, which did not happen. Could

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Speaker 2: we not have done something else instead? That is when

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Speaker 2: I asked her what her game plan was when she

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Speaker 2: and Leo were trying to find a dress. My wife

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Speaker 2: was dumbfounded and admitted that she thought about going to

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Speaker 2: a lunch, but it did not happen. I asked her

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Speaker 2: if she noticed how upset Lea was at dress shopping,

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Speaker 2: because on the drive home, Leah told me that while

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Speaker 2: she hated shopping, she had fun at the movie. That

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Speaker 2: was when she spilled that she was upset at being

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Speaker 2: left out of the wedding, how she did not want

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Speaker 2: to be a guest when her sisters and cousins get

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Speaker 2: to be flower girls, or ushers or the ring bearer.

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Speaker 2: She did not like how she looks in dresses and

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Speaker 2: was afraid of what everyone was going to say about her.

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Speaker 2: But she hated the suit she tried on more. She

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Speaker 2: thought it felt like a chore and asked if it

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00:19:00,800 --> 00:19:04,000
Speaker 2: was too late not to go. She uh, and she

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00:19:04,080 --> 00:19:06,359
Speaker 2: told me that once her mom said it was not

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Speaker 2: about her as much as she hated that we watched.

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Speaker 2: Twenty eight years later, my wife admitted that she screwed

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Speaker 2: up on the dress part that we should have done

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Speaker 2: more of an effort to make this wedding experience better

400
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Speaker 2: for her. My wife apologized and said I did good.

401
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Speaker 2: The wedding itself was a dumpster fire, but that's a

402
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Speaker 2: story for another time. My wife did make it up

403
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Speaker 2: to Lea by letting an older cousin take her out

404
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Speaker 2: to get her hair and nails done the morning of

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Speaker 2: the wedding. One good thing that came out of this

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Speaker 2: Leah loved the movie date and has been asking when

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Speaker 2: we can do it again. I returned the dress. She

408
00:19:40,400 --> 00:19:42,760
Speaker 2: did say she hated it and will not wear it again.

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Speaker 2: And I'm going to use the money to take her

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Speaker 2: to watch Weapons when it comes out.

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Speaker 6: Like I said, Like I said, this was a gateway thing.

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Speaker 6: This is like so let's see how much she likes it.

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Speaker 6: She loves it all right to the next thing.

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Speaker 1: One specifically feels like it would be extra scary for

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Speaker 1: a twelve year old, Like I watched that movie and

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Speaker 1: I'm like, this movie's not scary at all. It's just interesting,

417
00:20:04,200 --> 00:20:07,359
Speaker 1: but that's because I'm not twelve. Like it literally centers

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Speaker 1: around like a fourth grade class that all disappear like

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Speaker 1: no spoilers that's the whole plot of the movie, is

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Speaker 1: that that's the basic premise of the movie. They all disappear.

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Speaker 2: Well, I guess now is when she gets scarred?

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00:20:20,800 --> 00:20:22,399
Speaker 1: Then yeah, I don't know.

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Speaker 7: Yeah.

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Speaker 1: Whatever.

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00:20:23,280 --> 00:20:26,760
Speaker 6: Again, he's gauging how he can get his daughter to

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Speaker 6: love horror, and he's seeing how much it can scar her.

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00:20:29,680 --> 00:20:31,399
Speaker 6: And that's the thing. But I think you need to

428
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Speaker 6: ask your wife, like, what's cool?

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Speaker 2: It sounds like the wife's down now.

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Speaker 7: Yeah.

431
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Speaker 2: We have also been watching more movies at home together

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Speaker 2: when her sisters are in bed.

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Speaker 4: Of course.

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Speaker 2: Update two is it normal to have kids at the

435
00:20:42,800 --> 00:20:45,960
Speaker 2: rehearsal dinner? My brother is getting married this weekend. There's

436
00:20:46,000 --> 00:20:48,600
Speaker 2: a rehearsal dinner on Friday night. He and his wife

437
00:20:48,680 --> 00:20:51,520
Speaker 2: to be made it clear that it was a bridal

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Speaker 2: party only. My wife and I took it to mean

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00:20:54,320 --> 00:20:57,480
Speaker 2: adults only. However, my brother is now telling me that

440
00:20:57,520 --> 00:21:00,600
Speaker 2: it includes the kids in the party aka my two

441
00:21:00,680 --> 00:21:04,200
Speaker 2: younger daughters and a nephew, and that his wife cannot

442
00:21:04,200 --> 00:21:06,479
Speaker 2: wait to see them at the dinner. We have another

443
00:21:06,560 --> 00:21:09,560
Speaker 2: kid who's not in the party. We already made plans

444
00:21:09,560 --> 00:21:11,680
Speaker 2: for an older cousin to take them to get pizza

445
00:21:11,760 --> 00:21:14,959
Speaker 2: and watch Fantastic four. I need some input. Is it

446
00:21:15,040 --> 00:21:17,920
Speaker 2: normal to have kids at the rehearsal dinner. I cannot

447
00:21:18,000 --> 00:21:21,640
Speaker 2: find any other info online. Otherwise, I am just going

448
00:21:21,680 --> 00:21:24,080
Speaker 2: to tell my brother that the kids already have plans.

449
00:21:24,880 --> 00:21:25,080
Speaker 1: Edit.

450
00:21:25,200 --> 00:21:27,399
Speaker 2: To be clear, the plan is for our younger kids

451
00:21:27,440 --> 00:21:30,359
Speaker 2: to go to the rehearsal itself, then have the cousin

452
00:21:30,440 --> 00:21:32,760
Speaker 2: come pick them up for the movie. The other reason

453
00:21:32,800 --> 00:21:35,159
Speaker 2: why we thought the dinner would be adults only is

454
00:21:35,200 --> 00:21:37,560
Speaker 2: because it is going to be at a steakhouse that

455
00:21:37,600 --> 00:21:41,280
Speaker 2: does not offer a lot for kids. Lastly, why is

456
00:21:41,320 --> 00:21:43,840
Speaker 2: my oldest not in the bridal party. My brother said

457
00:21:43,880 --> 00:21:47,000
Speaker 2: that she is too old. She is not the only one,

458
00:21:47,320 --> 00:21:49,280
Speaker 2: as she has some older cousins who did not make

459
00:21:49,280 --> 00:21:51,840
Speaker 2: the cut either. She's hanging out with them on the

460
00:21:51,920 --> 00:21:52,840
Speaker 2: day of the rehearsal.

461
00:21:53,800 --> 00:21:54,160
Speaker 1: Edit two.

462
00:21:54,920 --> 00:21:56,080
Speaker 4: I just got off the phone.

463
00:21:56,520 --> 00:21:58,639
Speaker 2: I asked my brother what he meant by bridal party

464
00:21:58,680 --> 00:22:01,439
Speaker 2: only and kids in the park. He said that the

465
00:22:01,480 --> 00:22:04,560
Speaker 2: rehearsal dinner was for everyone who went to the rehearsal

466
00:22:05,040 --> 00:22:08,120
Speaker 2: and their parents. I asked if my oldest could come,

467
00:22:08,240 --> 00:22:11,879
Speaker 2: even though she is a guest. He said no because

468
00:22:11,880 --> 00:22:14,560
Speaker 2: his wife's family is paying for it. The restaurant is

469
00:22:14,640 --> 00:22:16,760
Speaker 2: really pricey, and they want to keep it to people

470
00:22:16,760 --> 00:22:20,200
Speaker 2: who are actually in the wedding. My wife apparently got

471
00:22:20,200 --> 00:22:23,240
Speaker 2: a pass because of our two youngest. What a crock

472
00:22:23,280 --> 00:22:26,000
Speaker 2: of crap. I told my brother that, sorry, the kids

473
00:22:26,040 --> 00:22:28,320
Speaker 2: already have plans for Friday night, but my wife and

474
00:22:28,359 --> 00:22:29,880
Speaker 2: I will be there, okay.

475
00:22:30,040 --> 00:22:30,720
Speaker 4: Update three.

476
00:22:30,920 --> 00:22:34,080
Speaker 1: Yeah, how are you gonna exclude an actual You're like, yeah, no,

477
00:22:34,160 --> 00:22:36,400
Speaker 1: I don't know. It's a really pricey restaurant. We can't

478
00:22:36,440 --> 00:22:42,400
Speaker 1: afford like a child's size portion. Yeah, you know, just yeah,

479
00:22:42,440 --> 00:22:44,600
Speaker 1: a kid's meal. You would say, you're gonna have to

480
00:22:44,760 --> 00:22:46,840
Speaker 1: exclude your child, oh.

481
00:22:46,680 --> 00:22:49,000
Speaker 2: Child side portion? Keon, Come on, she.

482
00:22:49,080 --> 00:22:51,639
Speaker 1: Just hasn't earned it, nor does she deserve to be

483
00:22:51,800 --> 00:22:54,000
Speaker 1: with her family for a meal. Weird energy.

484
00:22:54,440 --> 00:22:55,080
Speaker 4: Update three.

485
00:22:55,440 --> 00:22:59,040
Speaker 2: The wedding coordinator screamed at an usher, leading us to

486
00:22:59,200 --> 00:23:03,040
Speaker 2: walk out. This happened at my brother's wedding last week.

487
00:23:03,200 --> 00:23:06,240
Speaker 2: There were four ushers, two of whom are our nephews,

488
00:23:06,320 --> 00:23:09,240
Speaker 2: and two were related to the bride. I do not

489
00:23:09,400 --> 00:23:12,560
Speaker 2: remember how they are related. This is a wedding of

490
00:23:12,640 --> 00:23:16,919
Speaker 2: two hundred and fifty plus people, and the bride's ushers disappeared,

491
00:23:17,080 --> 00:23:20,760
Speaker 2: leaving Jackson and Newt, who are seventeen and fourteen, to

492
00:23:20,800 --> 00:23:23,919
Speaker 2: hold down the fort. Something important to note is that

493
00:23:23,960 --> 00:23:28,040
Speaker 2: we think Newt is on the spectrum. He gets easily overstimulated.

494
00:23:28,600 --> 00:23:32,040
Speaker 2: Having to deal with hundreds of guests left him feeling overwhelmed.

495
00:23:32,480 --> 00:23:35,440
Speaker 2: My daughter Leah is close to Newt, and he asked

496
00:23:35,480 --> 00:23:38,320
Speaker 2: her to help while he went to calm down. I

497
00:23:38,359 --> 00:23:40,640
Speaker 2: am in this room getting ready with my brother and

498
00:23:40,760 --> 00:23:43,720
Speaker 2: the other groomsmen when someone comes to get me because

499
00:23:43,760 --> 00:23:46,520
Speaker 2: the wedding coordinator is screaming at my.

500
00:23:46,600 --> 00:23:47,520
Speaker 4: Twelve year old.

501
00:23:48,440 --> 00:23:50,480
Speaker 2: I run out to the front and I see this

502
00:23:50,760 --> 00:23:55,760
Speaker 2: Abby Lee Miller looking psycho, yelling at my daughter, screaming

503
00:23:55,800 --> 00:23:59,159
Speaker 2: at my nephew, and new is freaking out while Leah

504
00:23:59,240 --> 00:24:03,400
Speaker 2: is trying to him down. My sister Melissa is alerted

505
00:24:03,440 --> 00:24:07,160
Speaker 2: and she comes out yelling at the coordinator to stop it.

506
00:24:07,160 --> 00:24:10,000
Speaker 2: It became a whole thing where everyone was shouting and

507
00:24:10,119 --> 00:24:12,679
Speaker 2: screaming at each other like it was in episodes of

508
00:24:12,760 --> 00:24:16,200
Speaker 2: Real Housewives of Fort Myers. I feel it's so bad

509
00:24:16,280 --> 00:24:19,320
Speaker 2: for Leah though, it's like they finally kind of got

510
00:24:19,320 --> 00:24:22,520
Speaker 2: her excited about this wedding, like got her hair done

511
00:24:22,560 --> 00:24:24,879
Speaker 2: that morning, got her nails done that morning with her cousin,

512
00:24:25,000 --> 00:24:27,760
Speaker 2: Like is seeing horror movies for the first time, get

513
00:24:27,960 --> 00:24:30,720
Speaker 2: screamed out immediately before the wedding starts.

514
00:24:30,840 --> 00:24:32,800
Speaker 1: That's uh, why are you screaming at children?

515
00:24:32,920 --> 00:24:34,840
Speaker 2: You know, poor twelve year old can't cut a break.

516
00:24:34,960 --> 00:24:36,959
Speaker 2: Come on now, any final comments.

517
00:24:37,200 --> 00:24:39,080
Speaker 1: We've covered a lot of ground in this story.

518
00:24:39,280 --> 00:24:40,120
Speaker 2: Indeed we have.

519
00:24:40,440 --> 00:24:42,520
Speaker 1: I think you all should just go see another R

520
00:24:42,600 --> 00:24:43,439
Speaker 1: rated movie together.

521
00:24:44,080 --> 00:24:45,800
Speaker 2: Introduce the two young ones.

522
00:24:46,040 --> 00:24:49,159
Speaker 1: Yes, get just get them all watching R rated movies.

523
00:24:49,359 --> 00:24:52,200
Speaker 1: Have him watch Alien, You know that one. You can

524
00:24:52,480 --> 00:24:55,800
Speaker 1: just be scared for the rest of your life. Oof.

525
00:24:56,320 --> 00:24:58,480
Speaker 2: That seems like Dakota's own personal scar.

526
00:24:58,680 --> 00:25:00,479
Speaker 1: Oh well, I don't know. I'm trying to think, like

527
00:25:01,160 --> 00:25:03,879
Speaker 1: I used to just get scared from like trailers for

528
00:25:04,040 --> 00:25:06,240
Speaker 1: but I feel like back back when I was a kid,

529
00:25:06,320 --> 00:25:08,159
Speaker 1: like the trailers were way worse.

530
00:25:08,359 --> 00:25:11,040
Speaker 7: Oh yeah, that was scary jump scares. They had jump

531
00:25:11,040 --> 00:25:14,320
Speaker 7: scar jump scares in the trail the day.

532
00:25:14,359 --> 00:25:16,120
Speaker 1: I think that the one that really got I think

533
00:25:16,160 --> 00:25:18,320
Speaker 1: there was a trailer for the Unborn that I saw

534
00:25:18,359 --> 00:25:20,400
Speaker 1: and I just like would never I never got over.

535
00:25:20,440 --> 00:25:22,040
Speaker 6: The worst is when it came on at a night

536
00:25:22,160 --> 00:25:24,000
Speaker 6: that's the worst during the days I got friend.

537
00:25:24,359 --> 00:25:27,600
Speaker 2: I am assuming though, too, that because there would have

538
00:25:27,600 --> 00:25:31,000
Speaker 2: been trailers before twenty eight years later, if she really

539
00:25:31,160 --> 00:25:33,520
Speaker 2: was that scared, he probably would have figured it out

540
00:25:33,600 --> 00:25:34,600
Speaker 2: during those trailers.

541
00:25:34,760 --> 00:25:36,880
Speaker 1: Yeah, I suppose so, at least to.

542
00:25:37,000 --> 00:25:39,679
Speaker 2: The extent of, like, I don't know, like even the

543
00:25:39,720 --> 00:25:42,760
Speaker 2: tiny things like if she's gonna be like really traumatized,

544
00:25:42,800 --> 00:25:43,840
Speaker 2: you'd probably figure that one out.

545
00:25:43,920 --> 00:25:46,960
Speaker 1: Yeah, I think. I think for me, it's always the more,

546
00:25:47,080 --> 00:25:49,960
Speaker 1: the bigger, overarching ideas that that freaked me out.

547
00:25:50,080 --> 00:25:53,639
Speaker 2: When it is over, the coordinator stormed off, new is

548
00:25:53,680 --> 00:25:58,720
Speaker 2: freaking out, and Leah Jackson and Melissa are furious. Melissa

549
00:25:58,760 --> 00:26:01,640
Speaker 2: decided then and there to take the boys home. Lea

550
00:26:01,800 --> 00:26:04,240
Speaker 2: wants to go too, which me and her mom gave

551
00:26:04,280 --> 00:26:07,919
Speaker 2: her the okay. Several of their cousins also decided to

552
00:26:08,000 --> 00:26:11,679
Speaker 2: walk out. We ended up leaving immediately after the ceremony.

553
00:26:12,320 --> 00:26:16,160
Speaker 2: The bride was furious that half of the attendees, mostly

554
00:26:16,200 --> 00:26:19,120
Speaker 2: on the groom side, ended up not coming to the reception.

555
00:26:20,040 --> 00:26:22,800
Speaker 2: As for the two other ushers, right now, the bride

556
00:26:22,840 --> 00:26:25,040
Speaker 2: and groom are in trouble with the venue because the

557
00:26:25,160 --> 00:26:28,480
Speaker 2: ushers were found smoking on the grounds. We live in

558
00:26:28,520 --> 00:26:32,120
Speaker 2: Florida and what they were smoking is not legal recreationally.

559
00:26:32,720 --> 00:26:34,080
Speaker 2: That is the end of that story.

560
00:26:35,040 --> 00:26:37,080
Speaker 1: Hey, it's Sam. We get back to the stories. But

561
00:26:37,200 --> 00:26:40,280
Speaker 1: here's three minutes of ads from our sponsors. My brothers

562
00:26:40,320 --> 00:26:43,640
Speaker 1: stole my mother's inheritance, but I'm the one who took

563
00:26:43,680 --> 00:26:46,439
Speaker 1: the blame. Oh you took the fall for that. Sorry,

564
00:26:46,600 --> 00:26:49,560
Speaker 1: Hi read it. I twenty six mail recently found out

565
00:26:49,560 --> 00:26:52,159
Speaker 1: my older brother twenty nine males, stole money out of

566
00:26:52,160 --> 00:26:55,560
Speaker 1: a safe at my parents' house that was filled with

567
00:26:55,720 --> 00:26:59,199
Speaker 1: money my mother inherited from my late grandfather. Let me

568
00:26:59,240 --> 00:27:00,920
Speaker 1: try to set this up. By the way, this comes

569
00:27:00,920 --> 00:27:03,240
Speaker 1: from user a normal still seven four seven and if

570
00:27:03,280 --> 00:27:04,760
Speaker 1: you want to submit your own stories, go to the

571
00:27:04,840 --> 00:27:08,639
Speaker 1: r slash Okay store time subreddit. I'm Dakota, I'm Keon,

572
00:27:09,080 --> 00:27:10,800
Speaker 1: and we here to give you a little good advice.

573
00:27:10,960 --> 00:27:14,200
Speaker 1: Goof limp because we don't have on answers, so h

574
00:27:14,400 --> 00:27:17,480
Speaker 1: if you would do something different than what we would do,

575
00:27:17,880 --> 00:27:20,560
Speaker 1: let us know in the comments. My parents have pretty

576
00:27:20,640 --> 00:27:23,760
Speaker 1: much always been struggling financially, but always made sure that

577
00:27:23,840 --> 00:27:26,840
Speaker 1: me and my two brothers had everything we needed. At

578
00:27:26,840 --> 00:27:30,919
Speaker 1: my grandfather's Metallica bed, he told my mother about the

579
00:27:30,920 --> 00:27:33,119
Speaker 1: inheritance money and that he wanted her to buy a

580
00:27:33,160 --> 00:27:35,919
Speaker 1: house with the money he left her. My grandfather was

581
00:27:35,960 --> 00:27:38,400
Speaker 1: not wealthy by any means, but he wanted to help

582
00:27:38,520 --> 00:27:42,800
Speaker 1: my mother for legal reasons. I cannot really explain how

583
00:27:42,840 --> 00:27:44,719
Speaker 1: she got the money in cash in a safe at

584
00:27:44,760 --> 00:27:47,720
Speaker 1: our house. The only people who knew about this were me,

585
00:27:47,840 --> 00:27:51,280
Speaker 1: my parents, my brothers, and three older family members from

586
00:27:51,320 --> 00:27:55,280
Speaker 1: my dad's side. My brother has a gambling problem and

587
00:27:55,400 --> 00:27:58,679
Speaker 1: has for quite some time, but he kept quitting and

588
00:27:58,760 --> 00:28:01,840
Speaker 1: keeping all of his debt a secret. In September twenty

589
00:28:01,880 --> 00:28:05,800
Speaker 1: twenty four, my parents anniversary, my parents were about to

590
00:28:05,920 --> 00:28:08,960
Speaker 1: leave for the holiday. My mother wanted to take some

591
00:28:09,080 --> 00:28:12,080
Speaker 1: money out of the safe, just in case of an emergency.

592
00:28:12,680 --> 00:28:15,080
Speaker 1: When she checked the safe, she saw that forty two

593
00:28:15,280 --> 00:28:18,960
Speaker 1: K out of the forty five K was gone, leaving

594
00:28:18,960 --> 00:28:23,240
Speaker 1: her only with three thousand dollars, the exact amount my

595
00:28:23,320 --> 00:28:27,560
Speaker 1: parents had to pay in taxes in two months. My mother,

596
00:28:27,680 --> 00:28:32,280
Speaker 1: fifty two female, was hysterical. She kept screaming and blaming everyone.

597
00:28:32,520 --> 00:28:34,520
Speaker 1: The fact that only three thousand was left was a

598
00:28:34,520 --> 00:28:36,320
Speaker 1: big indicator that it had to be someone who was

599
00:28:36,359 --> 00:28:39,400
Speaker 1: home often, which meant me my father, fifty one male,

600
00:28:39,600 --> 00:28:42,000
Speaker 1: or one of my brothers. I was unable to calm

601
00:28:42,000 --> 00:28:44,520
Speaker 1: her down. For the first time in my life, I

602
00:28:44,600 --> 00:28:47,120
Speaker 1: looked into the eyes of my brothers, and even though

603
00:28:47,120 --> 00:28:49,560
Speaker 1: I sent some doubt looking at my older brother, I

604
00:28:49,640 --> 00:28:52,640
Speaker 1: classified it as shock and swept it under the rug.

605
00:28:53,440 --> 00:28:56,520
Speaker 1: I knew this altercation had the possibility of breaking my

606
00:28:56,600 --> 00:28:59,280
Speaker 1: family apart, so I promised both my brothers that I

607
00:28:59,320 --> 00:29:01,760
Speaker 1: would never them in the hope that we could keep

608
00:29:01,800 --> 00:29:05,760
Speaker 1: our family dynamic intact. My parents were really unpredictable at

609
00:29:05,760 --> 00:29:08,800
Speaker 1: this time, so I needed at least some insurance. I

610
00:29:08,920 --> 00:29:11,680
Speaker 1: swore to my parents that I did not do it.

611
00:29:12,040 --> 00:29:15,120
Speaker 1: I did not do this. I'm in my final year

612
00:29:15,160 --> 00:29:17,680
Speaker 1: of law school and work every weekend and holidays to

613
00:29:17,720 --> 00:29:20,680
Speaker 1: pay for everything myself since my parents can't afford it.

614
00:29:21,240 --> 00:29:23,360
Speaker 1: If I had that kind of money on the side,

615
00:29:24,120 --> 00:29:27,120
Speaker 1: I wouldn't be overworking myself anyway. But that was not

616
00:29:27,280 --> 00:29:30,760
Speaker 1: a good enough excuse because I kept being a suspect.

617
00:29:31,560 --> 00:29:34,360
Speaker 1: My father had a really weird way of going about

618
00:29:34,400 --> 00:29:36,440
Speaker 1: this whole thing. The first two weeks, he was really

619
00:29:36,440 --> 00:29:39,720
Speaker 1: calm and assumed the money was stolen by someone outside

620
00:29:39,720 --> 00:29:44,000
Speaker 1: of our household. However, after those two weeks, he snapped

621
00:29:44,760 --> 00:29:47,440
Speaker 1: I was basically living in the same house as a tyrant.

622
00:29:48,040 --> 00:29:50,680
Speaker 1: No more talking at dinner, He did not want to

623
00:29:50,760 --> 00:29:55,400
Speaker 1: drive me to the train station, and many other things.

624
00:29:55,720 --> 00:29:59,560
Speaker 1: I stay in a student home near my university during

625
00:29:59,560 --> 00:30:02,000
Speaker 1: the week and go back on weekends to see my

626
00:30:02,120 --> 00:30:04,520
Speaker 1: family and also for my student job, which is in

627
00:30:04,600 --> 00:30:07,320
Speaker 1: my hometown. He thought going about it this way would

628
00:30:07,360 --> 00:30:10,360
Speaker 1: cause guilt in the one who actually did it, but

629
00:30:10,480 --> 00:30:14,640
Speaker 1: obviously nothing came to light. After staying at home for

630
00:30:14,840 --> 00:30:17,840
Speaker 1: over a week, I had enough and simply packed my

631
00:30:17,880 --> 00:30:20,200
Speaker 1: suitcase and texted my older brother to ask if he

632
00:30:20,200 --> 00:30:23,080
Speaker 1: could drive me to the train station. He recently moved

633
00:30:23,120 --> 00:30:25,720
Speaker 1: into his house with his girlfriend, so he lives about

634
00:30:25,720 --> 00:30:28,760
Speaker 1: fifteen minutes away. I talked to him about everything that

635
00:30:28,840 --> 00:30:30,920
Speaker 1: happened and that I would not be coming back if

636
00:30:30,960 --> 00:30:34,080
Speaker 1: my parents wouldn't get their act together. He went back

637
00:30:34,080 --> 00:30:36,000
Speaker 1: home to my parents and told them he thought I

638
00:30:36,040 --> 00:30:38,720
Speaker 1: was acting very suspicious and that I was probably the

639
00:30:38,720 --> 00:30:41,120
Speaker 1: one who did it, which he obviously did not tell me.

640
00:30:41,320 --> 00:30:44,560
Speaker 1: That week, I received multiple messages from both of my parents,

641
00:30:44,640 --> 00:30:48,160
Speaker 1: but my dad's messages stung the most. They were along

642
00:30:48,200 --> 00:30:50,920
Speaker 1: the lines of I know guilt is eating you up

643
00:30:50,960 --> 00:30:54,120
Speaker 1: alive on the inside, just admit it so we can

644
00:30:54,160 --> 00:30:57,120
Speaker 1: move on from this. I denied the accusations and told

645
00:30:57,200 --> 00:30:59,680
Speaker 1: him I was not coming home until he calmed down.

646
00:31:00,520 --> 00:31:03,200
Speaker 1: Fast forward two weeks later, I'm back at home and

647
00:31:03,240 --> 00:31:06,000
Speaker 1: everyone's sitting at the dinner table. We start talking about

648
00:31:06,000 --> 00:31:08,560
Speaker 1: that stolen money. I was so fed up with it

649
00:31:08,600 --> 00:31:10,479
Speaker 1: that I took the initiative and told them about how

650
00:31:10,480 --> 00:31:13,320
Speaker 1: this is ruining our family dynamic and that we should

651
00:31:13,320 --> 00:31:16,240
Speaker 1: be putting this to rest for now, otherwise we're all

652
00:31:16,280 --> 00:31:20,520
Speaker 1: going to suffer. My older brother dared to say the following,

653
00:31:20,840 --> 00:31:23,400
Speaker 1: I have to be honest, I do think that you're

654
00:31:23,400 --> 00:31:25,640
Speaker 1: the most suspicious out of all of us. You're at

655
00:31:25,680 --> 00:31:28,200
Speaker 1: your student no, I'm doing god knows what, and you

656
00:31:28,280 --> 00:31:31,880
Speaker 1: have asked me for money before, one time twenty dollars

657
00:31:32,280 --> 00:31:36,240
Speaker 1: but okay. I didn't want to believe what I was hearing,

658
00:31:36,280 --> 00:31:38,680
Speaker 1: but immediately countered with, well, you're the one that bought

659
00:31:38,680 --> 00:31:41,760
Speaker 1: a house and is still renovating it and had a

660
00:31:41,800 --> 00:31:44,640
Speaker 1: gambling problem in the past, so I would say you

661
00:31:44,680 --> 00:31:46,719
Speaker 1: would be more likely to feel entitled to that kind

662
00:31:46,760 --> 00:31:49,720
Speaker 1: of money. I managed to divert the conversation away from

663
00:31:49,720 --> 00:31:52,760
Speaker 1: accusing each other, and finally convinced my parents to calm

664
00:31:52,800 --> 00:31:55,960
Speaker 1: down and wait it out. During the past year, family

665
00:31:55,960 --> 00:31:58,680
Speaker 1: members who knew about it turned on me and started

666
00:31:58,680 --> 00:32:02,680
Speaker 1: addressing me and my brother's thieves, and my parents took

667
00:32:02,720 --> 00:32:04,560
Speaker 1: the keys of my student home and went to look

668
00:32:04,600 --> 00:32:06,560
Speaker 1: for the money while I was at my student job

669
00:32:06,600 --> 00:32:09,680
Speaker 1: without my knowledge. This guy, the oldest brother, bought this

670
00:32:09,920 --> 00:32:12,480
Speaker 1: freaking house and has a gambling problem.

671
00:32:12,560 --> 00:32:15,880
Speaker 6: He's like barely hiding it, like it's a brand new house,

672
00:32:16,360 --> 00:32:19,560
Speaker 6: shiny renovations, new things, and everyone's like.

673
00:32:19,640 --> 00:32:22,800
Speaker 1: It can't be hid, dude. I mean, honestly, it's probably gone.

674
00:32:23,880 --> 00:32:26,680
Speaker 1: Mister gamble Ruski over here probably was like, yeah, no,

675
00:32:26,760 --> 00:32:29,440
Speaker 1: I put forty two thousand dollars on red and lost

676
00:32:29,440 --> 00:32:32,920
Speaker 1: it immediately. I was my plan. My plan. My plan

677
00:32:33,080 --> 00:32:36,120
Speaker 1: was to take all that money, double it immediately at

678
00:32:36,160 --> 00:32:38,680
Speaker 1: the casino and then bring it back and then I

679
00:32:38,720 --> 00:32:41,600
Speaker 1: could have I lost it. I lost it day one,

680
00:32:41,840 --> 00:32:43,800
Speaker 1: hour one. I lost all that money.

681
00:32:43,800 --> 00:32:48,320
Speaker 6: But they also they also went to Ope's like student living,

682
00:32:48,520 --> 00:32:51,520
Speaker 6: student dorm, whatever, and they're like, it's just gonna be

683
00:32:51,520 --> 00:32:52,040
Speaker 6: sitting there.

684
00:32:52,120 --> 00:32:54,520
Speaker 1: Yeah, it's just gonna be I'm gonna open up the

685
00:32:54,560 --> 00:32:57,560
Speaker 1: closet and it's gonna be like the hell from Hey Arnold,

686
00:32:57,680 --> 00:33:00,240
Speaker 1: Like behind the clothes, you just have a stab of

687
00:33:00,280 --> 00:33:01,080
Speaker 1: her forty two.

688
00:33:01,440 --> 00:33:03,560
Speaker 6: Sleeping on the money, like, oh, it's a money bed,

689
00:33:03,840 --> 00:33:04,520
Speaker 6: Like come on.

690
00:33:04,640 --> 00:33:09,640
Speaker 1: Money money. I gotta be clear about one thing. I've

691
00:33:09,680 --> 00:33:11,760
Speaker 1: always had a great bond with my mother, the kind

692
00:33:11,760 --> 00:33:14,479
Speaker 1: of bond where you can tell what the other is

693
00:33:14,600 --> 00:33:18,240
Speaker 1: thinking without saying a word. So finding out about this

694
00:33:18,320 --> 00:33:21,400
Speaker 1: and the fact that she was actually suspecting me was

695
00:33:21,520 --> 00:33:24,200
Speaker 1: very hard news for me to bear. Every time I

696
00:33:24,240 --> 00:33:26,760
Speaker 1: went home during the weekends, my mom started pleading for

697
00:33:26,840 --> 00:33:29,160
Speaker 1: me to tell her I did it, and afterwards she

698
00:33:29,240 --> 00:33:31,560
Speaker 1: kept saying she did the same thing with my brothers.

699
00:33:32,160 --> 00:33:35,000
Speaker 1: It was not a very nice vibe. After a week

700
00:33:35,040 --> 00:33:39,400
Speaker 1: of classes every single week, the tensions eased somewhat over

701
00:33:39,440 --> 00:33:42,360
Speaker 1: the next couple of months, but my mom always kept

702
00:33:42,400 --> 00:33:45,080
Speaker 1: talking to me about how she was still sleeping badly

703
00:33:45,160 --> 00:33:48,200
Speaker 1: and couldn't visit my grandfather's grave because she felt guilty

704
00:33:48,200 --> 00:33:52,040
Speaker 1: for losing the money. Cut to May twenty twenty five.

705
00:33:52,240 --> 00:33:54,920
Speaker 1: Last month, I was talking to mom about job offers

706
00:33:54,920 --> 00:33:57,880
Speaker 1: that I was getting and salaries included in these offers,

707
00:33:57,880 --> 00:34:00,480
Speaker 1: and suddenly she's talking to me about how this month

708
00:34:00,520 --> 00:34:02,600
Speaker 1: had been kind of rough, since this was the second

709
00:34:02,680 --> 00:34:04,480
Speaker 1: month in a row. My older brother had asked for

710
00:34:04,560 --> 00:34:07,920
Speaker 1: money one thousand dollars a month, which is a lot.

711
00:34:08,560 --> 00:34:10,600
Speaker 1: He has a study job as an electrician, so I

712
00:34:10,680 --> 00:34:12,920
Speaker 1: was very confused about why he'd be needing this amount

713
00:34:12,920 --> 00:34:15,760
Speaker 1: of money for my parents. So how did I find

714
00:34:15,800 --> 00:34:19,399
Speaker 1: out he did it? The same night I remembered him

715
00:34:19,400 --> 00:34:22,520
Speaker 1: giving me his Netflix log in. I thought to myself,

716
00:34:22,640 --> 00:34:25,000
Speaker 1: what are the odds he uses the same password for

717
00:34:25,080 --> 00:34:29,319
Speaker 1: his email address? Pretty high? Apparently, when I opened his

718
00:34:29,360 --> 00:34:32,960
Speaker 1: regular mailbox, I saw emails from over twenty different gambling

719
00:34:33,040 --> 00:34:37,840
Speaker 1: websites and confirmations for money transfers the exact days my

720
00:34:37,920 --> 00:34:41,279
Speaker 1: mom sent him money for the exact amount she sent him.

721
00:34:42,080 --> 00:34:44,800
Speaker 1: It was sad knowing he relapsed again, but this didn't

722
00:34:44,840 --> 00:34:47,920
Speaker 1: prove anything related to the money. Then I remembered that

723
00:34:47,960 --> 00:34:51,000
Speaker 1: he had a second mailbox for all his online trading stuff,

724
00:34:51,520 --> 00:34:56,239
Speaker 1: and guess what, same password again. I went back to

725
00:34:56,320 --> 00:34:58,320
Speaker 1: the period where the money could have possibly been taken

726
00:34:58,320 --> 00:35:01,080
Speaker 1: and found evidence that he did it. Emails from the

727
00:35:01,080 --> 00:35:04,240
Speaker 1: bank asking him about thirty eight thousand dollars in cash

728
00:35:04,280 --> 00:35:06,759
Speaker 1: that he had been putting on his account in less

729
00:35:06,800 --> 00:35:09,080
Speaker 1: than three months. He told him it was a gift

730
00:35:09,080 --> 00:35:11,640
Speaker 1: from family members for his home renovations, and the bank

731
00:35:11,719 --> 00:35:14,120
Speaker 1: left him alone. It was about three am when I

732
00:35:14,160 --> 00:35:16,160
Speaker 1: found out, and I immediately went to my parents' room

733
00:35:16,200 --> 00:35:18,799
Speaker 1: and woke up my mother. I told her everything, and

734
00:35:18,840 --> 00:35:21,279
Speaker 1: she was relieved that she at least knew where the

735
00:35:21,360 --> 00:35:23,760
Speaker 1: money went. Did you get proof?

736
00:35:24,239 --> 00:35:25,160
Speaker 7: That's the biggest thing.

737
00:35:25,160 --> 00:35:28,640
Speaker 6: You can't be like, ah, use my word, did you

738
00:35:28,719 --> 00:35:29,400
Speaker 6: bring the mail?

739
00:35:29,760 --> 00:35:31,160
Speaker 7: Did you take photos?

740
00:35:31,880 --> 00:35:33,960
Speaker 6: I know it's illegal to do that stuff, but at

741
00:35:34,000 --> 00:35:36,640
Speaker 6: this point, for the sanity of everybody to like get

742
00:35:36,680 --> 00:35:40,080
Speaker 6: the facts straight because a boy, oh boy, not great dude.

743
00:35:40,120 --> 00:35:42,840
Speaker 1: I agree, Ronan cue Ronan Cuter just goes yo. This

744
00:35:42,920 --> 00:35:45,920
Speaker 1: family's slow af It's like, yet no one wanted to

745
00:35:45,960 --> 00:35:49,280
Speaker 1: suspect maybe at the older brother with the gambling problem,

746
00:35:49,280 --> 00:35:53,360
Speaker 1: who's trying to say that. It's clearly like the that

747
00:35:53,440 --> 00:35:56,200
Speaker 1: it's the younger sibling who's just going to school.

748
00:35:56,320 --> 00:35:57,920
Speaker 6: I got to give it to him for trying again.

749
00:35:58,000 --> 00:36:01,560
Speaker 6: It's just like he's like, you know, just admit it.

750
00:36:01,640 --> 00:36:05,279
Speaker 6: You did it, Like you're going to school? How dare

751
00:36:05,360 --> 00:36:07,400
Speaker 6: you I bought a brand new house. But that's my money.

752
00:36:07,480 --> 00:36:10,400
Speaker 6: But you're going to school. Just admit you did it?

753
00:36:10,440 --> 00:36:11,080
Speaker 7: Come on, I.

754
00:36:11,000 --> 00:36:12,799
Speaker 6: Guarantee you for like half a second. Ope, he's like,

755
00:36:13,000 --> 00:36:15,080
Speaker 6: did I did I do it?

756
00:36:15,520 --> 00:36:19,600
Speaker 1: The day after, we already told my father and younger

757
00:36:19,600 --> 00:36:22,680
Speaker 1: brother and decided to confront him in the evening after dinner.

758
00:36:23,239 --> 00:36:24,920
Speaker 1: I made sure to print out the evidence so we

759
00:36:24,920 --> 00:36:28,040
Speaker 1: could use it during our confrontation with him. When we did,

760
00:36:28,160 --> 00:36:31,040
Speaker 1: his face went pale. He didn't utter a single word

761
00:36:31,080 --> 00:36:34,120
Speaker 1: for about an hour and simply kept his gaze fixated

762
00:36:34,160 --> 00:36:38,319
Speaker 1: on his glass of water. He didn't even apologize or

763
00:36:38,400 --> 00:36:42,279
Speaker 1: express any type of remorse. He had gambling debt of

764
00:36:42,280 --> 00:36:45,040
Speaker 1: fourteen thousand and tried to use that money on online

765
00:36:45,080 --> 00:36:47,719
Speaker 1: casinos to win this amount. He said he would have

766
00:36:47,719 --> 00:36:50,239
Speaker 1: returned the money later. He didn't make a single cent

767
00:36:50,360 --> 00:36:53,279
Speaker 1: and lost everything, so now he still has his debt

768
00:36:53,320 --> 00:36:56,200
Speaker 1: of fourteen thousand. The only thing he said to me

769
00:36:56,320 --> 00:36:58,080
Speaker 1: was thank you for finding out. I would have never

770
00:36:58,080 --> 00:37:00,520
Speaker 1: been able to admit it. This admission left an nasty

771
00:37:00,600 --> 00:37:03,560
Speaker 1: feeling in my stomach. I can assure you I did

772
00:37:03,600 --> 00:37:05,840
Speaker 1: not do all that just to do him a favor.

773
00:37:06,480 --> 00:37:09,280
Speaker 1: I left for my exam preparation shortly after and blocked

774
00:37:09,360 --> 00:37:11,120
Speaker 1: him everywhere since I didn't want to see or hear

775
00:37:11,160 --> 00:37:15,759
Speaker 1: from him for a while. Keon, Dakota, what do we do?

776
00:37:16,080 --> 00:37:17,040
Speaker 1: What do we do with this brother?

777
00:37:17,120 --> 00:37:18,200
Speaker 7: We just call him a fever?

778
00:37:18,360 --> 00:37:21,000
Speaker 1: I mean, how are we giving him any money? Dude?

779
00:37:21,000 --> 00:37:22,680
Speaker 1: How are we giving this guy a single cent?

780
00:37:23,600 --> 00:37:25,560
Speaker 6: This is where I look at my parents and go,

781
00:37:26,000 --> 00:37:26,760
Speaker 6: are we blind?

782
00:37:27,080 --> 00:37:30,279
Speaker 1: It's kind of your fault. You've enabled this behavior for

783
00:37:30,320 --> 00:37:30,719
Speaker 1: so long.

784
00:37:30,800 --> 00:37:32,360
Speaker 6: The fact that the mom, I think someone brought it

785
00:37:32,400 --> 00:37:34,600
Speaker 6: up in the comments too, They're like the mom was relieved.

786
00:37:34,800 --> 00:37:37,719
Speaker 6: He's like, oh, thank goodness, we know where the money went.

787
00:37:37,840 --> 00:37:40,120
Speaker 6: When all this time was like it was in your face.

788
00:37:40,480 --> 00:37:44,360
Speaker 6: This was so explicitly in your face, and you guys

789
00:37:44,640 --> 00:37:46,040
Speaker 6: didn't want you didn't believe me.

790
00:37:46,560 --> 00:37:47,600
Speaker 1: Yeah, you know what.

791
00:37:47,600 --> 00:37:48,200
Speaker 7: You thought it was to be.

792
00:37:48,320 --> 00:37:51,319
Speaker 6: You went to my own dorm to check, like scan

793
00:37:51,440 --> 00:37:53,360
Speaker 6: it out when I wasn't even there to see if

794
00:37:53,400 --> 00:37:55,200
Speaker 6: I had the money. This is like I would just

795
00:37:55,200 --> 00:37:57,719
Speaker 6: look at my parents and be like, I have no

796
00:37:57,880 --> 00:37:58,719
Speaker 6: hope for you too.

797
00:37:58,840 --> 00:37:59,359
Speaker 7: That's crazy.

798
00:37:59,440 --> 00:38:02,960
Speaker 1: Also, where like consequences for this guy? What where his consequences?

799
00:38:03,040 --> 00:38:04,719
Speaker 6: Oh, Jacota, you understand the consequences.

800
00:38:04,760 --> 00:38:07,439
Speaker 1: He's already fourteen k in debt well, and I think

801
00:38:07,480 --> 00:38:10,200
Speaker 1: the biggest consequence should be you wouldn't You no longer

802
00:38:10,280 --> 00:38:13,280
Speaker 1: have access to your bank account. All of your money

803
00:38:14,040 --> 00:38:17,200
Speaker 1: goes through me first, as your as your parent. We're

804
00:38:17,239 --> 00:38:22,200
Speaker 1: setting this up unconditionally. You you either have us running

805
00:38:22,239 --> 00:38:25,200
Speaker 1: your bank accounts and giving you like a stipend from it,

806
00:38:25,840 --> 00:38:31,080
Speaker 1: or like you're never getting a shingle dollar from us

807
00:38:31,120 --> 00:38:35,160
Speaker 1: of support ever again, because you're just gonna throw it away.

808
00:38:35,239 --> 00:38:37,440
Speaker 1: You stole all that money. You could have just used

809
00:38:38,040 --> 00:38:41,200
Speaker 1: half of it to you know, a little less than

810
00:38:41,239 --> 00:38:43,040
Speaker 1: half of it to just pay off your debt.

811
00:38:43,440 --> 00:38:45,640
Speaker 7: Nah, there's no he was chasing the dragon.

812
00:38:45,719 --> 00:38:45,839
Speaker 2: Bro.

813
00:38:46,120 --> 00:38:48,960
Speaker 1: You used all of the money to gamble, lost all

814
00:38:48,960 --> 00:38:51,279
Speaker 1: of it and still had fourteen thousand dollars a debt.

815
00:38:52,120 --> 00:38:56,200
Speaker 1: You cannot be trusted with money anymore. Let's finish this.

816
00:38:56,400 --> 00:38:58,520
Speaker 1: During my exams, I kept in touch with my mom

817
00:38:58,560 --> 00:39:00,920
Speaker 1: and found out she had been paying for his therapy

818
00:39:01,320 --> 00:39:04,239
Speaker 1: and she is driving him there herself every week. My

819
00:39:04,360 --> 00:39:07,200
Speaker 1: family seems to have moved on. They went to the

820
00:39:07,239 --> 00:39:10,560
Speaker 1: movies together, to restaurants, and the WhatsApp family group chat

821
00:39:10,560 --> 00:39:14,400
Speaker 1: seems to be more lively than ever. I'm dreading going home.

822
00:39:14,840 --> 00:39:17,279
Speaker 1: My older brother not only used me as a scapegoat

823
00:39:17,280 --> 00:39:21,080
Speaker 1: to buy himself time, which were his exact words, but

824
00:39:21,160 --> 00:39:23,640
Speaker 1: he also made my life miserable the past year. As

825
00:39:23,680 --> 00:39:26,600
Speaker 1: I explained above, I told my parents I need time

826
00:39:26,640 --> 00:39:28,520
Speaker 1: to think about the whole situation, and then I don't

827
00:39:28,520 --> 00:39:31,160
Speaker 1: want them to force me to forgive him. The fact

828
00:39:31,160 --> 00:39:34,360
Speaker 1: that my parents haven't apologized for suspecting me and going

829
00:39:34,440 --> 00:39:37,560
Speaker 1: to my student home to search everything also plays on

830
00:39:37,600 --> 00:39:41,800
Speaker 1: my mind. Am I overreacting and the end of the story, No, over.

831
00:39:42,000 --> 00:39:45,600
Speaker 6: I'm reacting for you again. That's ridiculous that they're not

832
00:39:45,640 --> 00:39:48,360
Speaker 6: even owning up to it. They're like, see, this is

833
00:39:48,400 --> 00:39:50,080
Speaker 6: a good lesson for both of you.

834
00:39:50,160 --> 00:39:51,960
Speaker 1: Like what I did nothing?

835
00:39:52,400 --> 00:39:53,719
Speaker 7: Your parents have a favorite.

836
00:39:53,760 --> 00:39:55,560
Speaker 1: And that's the end of this story. We're gonna go

837
00:39:55,600 --> 00:39:58,360
Speaker 1: on to the next one. My girlfriend tried to change

838
00:39:58,400 --> 00:40:01,440
Speaker 1: who I am, and now I want to I can't

839
00:40:01,520 --> 00:40:05,640
Speaker 1: change I thirty male met her a thirty two female

840
00:40:05,640 --> 00:40:08,680
Speaker 1: earlier this year. We were fast friends within a month

841
00:40:08,760 --> 00:40:11,520
Speaker 1: of meeting, and dating after a month, and we had

842
00:40:11,640 --> 00:40:15,040
Speaker 1: a beneficial for around six months or so. I met

843
00:40:15,040 --> 00:40:17,680
Speaker 1: her on a night out with some friends. By the way,

844
00:40:17,719 --> 00:40:21,200
Speaker 1: this comes from user pam Tewearer one two three, and

845
00:40:21,280 --> 00:40:23,320
Speaker 1: if you want to submit your own stories, go to

846
00:40:23,360 --> 00:40:26,720
Speaker 1: the our slide Showcase Storytime subout it. I'm Dakota, I'm Sophia,

847
00:40:26,960 --> 00:40:28,640
Speaker 1: I'm Keon, and we're already give you a little bit

848
00:40:28,640 --> 00:40:30,440
Speaker 1: of good adviss goofy, but we don't have all the answers.

849
00:40:30,440 --> 00:40:33,080
Speaker 1: We're there as much gootballs, so if you would do

850
00:40:33,120 --> 00:40:35,400
Speaker 1: something different, she just let us know in the comments,

851
00:40:35,640 --> 00:40:39,239
Speaker 1: and op says. We lived separately, but she spent a

852
00:40:39,239 --> 00:40:41,440
Speaker 1: lot of time at my house as it is nearer

853
00:40:41,480 --> 00:40:45,520
Speaker 1: to where she works. Our relationship started really nicely. I

854
00:40:45,560 --> 00:40:47,840
Speaker 1: felt like we just got on really well and she

855
00:40:48,000 --> 00:40:52,640
Speaker 1: was really supportive of me as well well. But recently

856
00:40:52,760 --> 00:40:55,440
Speaker 1: she had been quite pushy about me making changes to

857
00:40:55,480 --> 00:40:59,440
Speaker 1: my lifestyle and seemed angry and disappointed with the results.

858
00:41:00,120 --> 00:41:03,400
Speaker 1: The two big ones were my work and what I wear.

859
00:41:04,239 --> 00:41:07,040
Speaker 1: As for my work, I work at the same store

860
00:41:07,080 --> 00:41:10,319
Speaker 1: I've worked at since I was sixteen. It's just an

861
00:41:10,400 --> 00:41:13,719
Speaker 1: easy job, pays my bills, and I know how to

862
00:41:13,760 --> 00:41:17,000
Speaker 1: do everything there. I am basically a manager without the

863
00:41:17,040 --> 00:41:20,600
Speaker 1: responsibility of actually being a manager, since I don't want

864
00:41:20,600 --> 00:41:24,600
Speaker 1: that level of responsibility for no extra pay. I also

865
00:41:24,719 --> 00:41:28,400
Speaker 1: make money via stocks and cryptocurrencies, so I don't struggle

866
00:41:28,440 --> 00:41:31,600
Speaker 1: for money. As for what I like to wear, I

867
00:41:31,680 --> 00:41:34,799
Speaker 1: have many jumpers and T shirts of an emo band

868
00:41:34,840 --> 00:41:36,880
Speaker 1: my friends and I love when we were young. I

869
00:41:36,960 --> 00:41:39,880
Speaker 1: genuinely have like fifty or so that I wear a

870
00:41:39,920 --> 00:41:42,799
Speaker 1: lot because it makes me happy and does not hurt

871
00:41:42,800 --> 00:41:46,120
Speaker 1: anyone either. I admit I have a bit of a

872
00:41:46,120 --> 00:41:51,239
Speaker 1: problem with anxiety. Familiarity helps me cope with it, and

873
00:41:51,360 --> 00:41:54,360
Speaker 1: some family think I might have OCD, but I have

874
00:41:54,560 --> 00:41:57,240
Speaker 1: never been diagnosed. I think if we wear in fifty

875
00:41:57,280 --> 00:41:59,560
Speaker 1: of the same T shirt my eye, you might have it.

876
00:42:00,080 --> 00:42:03,040
Speaker 7: A bus so you're his entire wardrobe.

877
00:42:03,120 --> 00:42:05,600
Speaker 4: You're just thirty years old. You're thirty years old. We

878
00:42:05,640 --> 00:42:09,239
Speaker 4: have fifty shirts of the same band. You work at

879
00:42:09,280 --> 00:42:12,480
Speaker 4: the same job that you worked at sixteen. Have not

880
00:42:12,680 --> 00:42:13,680
Speaker 4: had a pay risk.

881
00:42:14,520 --> 00:42:16,560
Speaker 1: Apparently you're not a manager.

882
00:42:16,680 --> 00:42:17,959
Speaker 4: You do all the manager task.

883
00:42:18,480 --> 00:42:19,040
Speaker 1: No you don't.

884
00:42:19,040 --> 00:42:20,960
Speaker 4: Sorry, you get paid the same as a manager, but

885
00:42:21,000 --> 00:42:21,840
Speaker 4: you don't.

886
00:42:21,600 --> 00:42:23,680
Speaker 1: Do the manager you're basically he's basically.

887
00:42:23,640 --> 00:42:25,480
Speaker 4: Basically a manager, where you're not a manager. So there's

888
00:42:25,520 --> 00:42:28,680
Speaker 4: no actual old sword.

889
00:42:28,760 --> 00:42:32,720
Speaker 1: Are you sure there's not a pay increase to being

890
00:42:32,760 --> 00:42:33,800
Speaker 1: a manager.

891
00:42:33,480 --> 00:42:37,719
Speaker 4: Because usually there is a pay increase. That's why you

892
00:42:37,760 --> 00:42:44,399
Speaker 4: just assume that. The point is I understand why your

893
00:42:44,480 --> 00:42:46,040
Speaker 4: girlfriend might be mad.

894
00:42:46,760 --> 00:42:51,280
Speaker 1: My girlfriend a few weeks ago expressed frustration with my clothes,

895
00:42:51,320 --> 00:42:53,560
Speaker 1: saying I need to grow up and get new ones.

896
00:42:54,400 --> 00:42:56,880
Speaker 1: She spends a lot of money to get whatever clothes

897
00:42:56,920 --> 00:42:59,880
Speaker 1: are in fashion, and I don't have a problem with that,

898
00:43:00,120 --> 00:43:03,320
Speaker 1: as it's her money to spend and she's not hurting anyone.

899
00:43:03,640 --> 00:43:06,440
Speaker 1: But I do not know why she has a problem

900
00:43:06,520 --> 00:43:10,239
Speaker 1: with my clothes. The argument was big, but resolved, and

901
00:43:10,360 --> 00:43:13,080
Speaker 1: we went shopping and bought some nice new clothes. Pick

902
00:43:13,480 --> 00:43:16,200
Speaker 1: They were actually quite nice and I like wearing them. Tho,

903
00:43:16,760 --> 00:43:18,600
Speaker 1: a few days later I was wearing a band T

904
00:43:18,719 --> 00:43:20,920
Speaker 1: shirt again because the new clothes were in the wash,

905
00:43:21,040 --> 00:43:24,880
Speaker 1: and she was really angry about it. That's that I

906
00:43:24,960 --> 00:43:27,440
Speaker 1: explained the new clothes were in the wash and it

907
00:43:27,520 --> 00:43:30,480
Speaker 1: was not decided that I would completely stop wearing the

908
00:43:30,560 --> 00:43:33,400
Speaker 1: band stuff. She would not talk to me for the

909
00:43:33,400 --> 00:43:34,160
Speaker 1: rest of the day.

910
00:43:34,400 --> 00:43:35,040
Speaker 4: Well, that's silly.

911
00:43:35,480 --> 00:43:37,720
Speaker 6: Why was this not brought up at the very beginning

912
00:43:37,719 --> 00:43:38,719
Speaker 6: of your relationship?

913
00:43:38,680 --> 00:43:38,799
Speaker 2: Oh?

914
00:43:38,840 --> 00:43:41,440
Speaker 4: I think she probably expected him to change, but that.

915
00:43:41,560 --> 00:43:42,959
Speaker 4: I think that's a little I think that's a little

916
00:43:43,000 --> 00:43:47,719
Speaker 4: unreasonable to expect a person to just change completely and

917
00:43:47,800 --> 00:43:49,560
Speaker 4: not wear the things that they like to wear. Like

918
00:43:49,640 --> 00:43:53,520
Speaker 4: he's already changing and adapting in certain ways, and I

919
00:43:53,560 --> 00:43:56,040
Speaker 4: think it's unreasonable for her to say you can't do

920
00:43:56,160 --> 00:43:57,920
Speaker 4: anything that you used to like to do because you

921
00:43:58,040 --> 00:43:58,719
Speaker 4: have to do it my way.

922
00:43:58,760 --> 00:44:01,040
Speaker 1: Of course. The next day, she had cooled off and

923
00:44:01,080 --> 00:44:03,360
Speaker 1: explained that she thinks new clothes will help me grow

924
00:44:03,440 --> 00:44:06,040
Speaker 1: as a person. We talked a long time and I

925
00:44:06,080 --> 00:44:10,719
Speaker 1: eventually agreed to get rid of no. While I was

926
00:44:10,800 --> 00:44:13,640
Speaker 1: packing them up, I started crying and she called me stupid.

927
00:44:13,719 --> 00:44:18,400
Speaker 1: Oh yeah, you break up with this person, dude. Whatever.

928
00:44:18,880 --> 00:44:21,359
Speaker 4: Yeah, that's not like I want to help you change,

929
00:44:21,719 --> 00:44:23,239
Speaker 4: Like I think that you would look really nice in

930
00:44:23,280 --> 00:44:27,080
Speaker 4: these clothes. That's like I hate who you are and

931
00:44:27,120 --> 00:44:28,680
Speaker 4: I want you to completely change.

932
00:44:28,520 --> 00:44:30,759
Speaker 7: Everything like a ken doll.

933
00:44:31,080 --> 00:44:32,440
Speaker 4: Yeah, and that's growdy.

934
00:44:32,760 --> 00:44:36,160
Speaker 1: Yeah. I asked her to leave. She came back a

935
00:44:36,200 --> 00:44:39,000
Speaker 1: few hours later and we made up. I packed the

936
00:44:39,040 --> 00:44:40,680
Speaker 1: boxes into my car and told her I was going

937
00:44:40,719 --> 00:44:43,279
Speaker 1: to donate them. She was really pleased and said I

938
00:44:43,360 --> 00:44:46,319
Speaker 1: was making the right choice getting rid of them. I

939
00:44:46,440 --> 00:44:47,600
Speaker 1: did not donate them.

940
00:44:47,719 --> 00:44:48,000
Speaker 4: Good.

941
00:44:48,640 --> 00:44:51,080
Speaker 1: I took them to work and I'm keeping them there

942
00:44:51,160 --> 00:44:56,239
Speaker 1: until further notice. My boss was confused, but understanding.

943
00:44:56,440 --> 00:44:58,759
Speaker 4: If you feel the need to hide the fact that

944
00:44:58,800 --> 00:45:00,759
Speaker 4: you have these clothes, you're in a adult. You're a

945
00:45:00,800 --> 00:45:04,520
Speaker 4: thirty year old adult. You're allowed to have the clothes

946
00:45:04,560 --> 00:45:08,279
Speaker 4: that you like. She cannot tell you to get rid

947
00:45:08,360 --> 00:45:08,719
Speaker 4: of them.

948
00:45:08,800 --> 00:45:09,399
Speaker 1: Yeah, for real?

949
00:45:09,560 --> 00:45:14,160
Speaker 4: Like what she can advise, she can suggest, She cannot

950
00:45:14,200 --> 00:45:15,040
Speaker 4: force you to do anything.

951
00:45:15,120 --> 00:45:16,759
Speaker 7: Yeah, the next thing she's gonna do is like, oh,

952
00:45:16,880 --> 00:45:18,400
Speaker 7: you like this band? Never played that?

953
00:45:18,520 --> 00:45:19,960
Speaker 4: Mutic can never listen to it again?

954
00:45:20,840 --> 00:45:23,480
Speaker 1: Yeah, come on. Now. I got back home and she

955
00:45:23,520 --> 00:45:28,400
Speaker 1: had ordered me lots of new clothes without you. That's weird,

956
00:45:28,440 --> 00:45:30,640
Speaker 1: she told me. She understands it was upsetting, but I

957
00:45:30,680 --> 00:45:32,879
Speaker 1: would be better off for it. That night, a few

958
00:45:32,880 --> 00:45:35,440
Speaker 1: hours later, she wanted to talk about my work and

959
00:45:35,600 --> 00:45:38,360
Speaker 1: why I was not a manager. I explained I do

960
00:45:38,480 --> 00:45:40,680
Speaker 1: not want to be. If she had been distant and

961
00:45:40,800 --> 00:45:43,360
Speaker 1: only talked about how I should ask to be a manager,

962
00:45:43,920 --> 00:45:45,920
Speaker 1: I kept explaining why I do not want to be

963
00:45:46,040 --> 00:45:48,200
Speaker 1: and I would not even be paid more, nor is

964
00:45:48,200 --> 00:45:50,759
Speaker 1: there a need for it at the store. She kept

965
00:45:50,800 --> 00:45:52,439
Speaker 1: saying that I need to fight for a pay rise

966
00:45:52,480 --> 00:45:54,759
Speaker 1: so I can treat us to nice things. I told

967
00:45:54,760 --> 00:45:56,520
Speaker 1: her that is not how it works, and then I

968
00:45:56,560 --> 00:45:58,680
Speaker 1: make money in other ways and she has her own

969
00:45:58,680 --> 00:46:01,440
Speaker 1: money too, so it shouldn't matter. She shouted at me

970
00:46:01,600 --> 00:46:04,839
Speaker 1: that I'm useless and stormed out. My boss also told

971
00:46:04,840 --> 00:46:06,680
Speaker 1: me she called the store and asked why I'm not

972
00:46:06,719 --> 00:46:09,640
Speaker 1: a manager. I think both of you need to be

973
00:46:09,760 --> 00:46:12,920
Speaker 1: making your way to a doctor's office to get diagnosed

974
00:46:13,719 --> 00:46:18,680
Speaker 1: with something. Yeah, she's gonna get diagnosed with mean over

975
00:46:18,719 --> 00:46:22,359
Speaker 1: controlling girlfriend disease. And I don't know what you get,

976
00:46:22,800 --> 00:46:29,000
Speaker 1: but would I would bet money on something? Yeah, And

977
00:46:29,040 --> 00:46:31,920
Speaker 1: that's okay. It's just we should be informed.

978
00:46:32,400 --> 00:46:34,319
Speaker 4: We know how to manage it.

979
00:46:34,880 --> 00:46:37,160
Speaker 1: After being upset and feeling useless for a few hours,

980
00:46:37,200 --> 00:46:39,640
Speaker 1: I decided I don't want to be with her. I

981
00:46:39,719 --> 00:46:41,640
Speaker 1: realized I don't see my friends as much as I

982
00:46:41,719 --> 00:46:44,200
Speaker 1: used to because she likes to spend all our free

983
00:46:44,200 --> 00:46:48,319
Speaker 1: time just us. I just do not feel happy with

984
00:46:48,360 --> 00:46:51,759
Speaker 1: her anymore and feel like she actually acted differently when

985
00:46:51,760 --> 00:46:54,560
Speaker 1: we started out just to get close to me. She

986
00:46:54,640 --> 00:46:56,880
Speaker 1: even said she loved all the band stuff when I

987
00:46:56,960 --> 00:47:03,680
Speaker 1: first showed her. I think she may be right that

988
00:47:03,719 --> 00:47:06,720
Speaker 1: the new clothes might help me a bit. I genuinely

989
00:47:06,719 --> 00:47:09,799
Speaker 1: appreciate that, and like how I look in some of

990
00:47:09,840 --> 00:47:12,520
Speaker 1: the clothes we bought. But I also liked how I

991
00:47:12,600 --> 00:47:15,600
Speaker 1: looked in the band stuff and still think it was

992
00:47:15,640 --> 00:47:18,400
Speaker 1: not over the top. I would normally just wear jeans

993
00:47:18,400 --> 00:47:21,080
Speaker 1: and a T shirt or jumper anyway. I don't think

994
00:47:21,120 --> 00:47:23,920
Speaker 1: it's as ridiculous as she said it was. I just

995
00:47:24,040 --> 00:47:26,960
Speaker 1: thought of it as a wearable collection. People collect a

996
00:47:27,000 --> 00:47:29,840
Speaker 1: weirder things as well as this. I really don't like

997
00:47:29,880 --> 00:47:32,280
Speaker 1: that I lied to her about donating the band stuff.

998
00:47:32,680 --> 00:47:36,480
Speaker 1: It felt horrible and dishonest. My boss and colleagues could

999
00:47:36,480 --> 00:47:38,799
Speaker 1: tell something was off when I took the boxes into work.

1000
00:47:39,320 --> 00:47:41,319
Speaker 1: I try to be honest, as I do not want

1001
00:47:41,320 --> 00:47:44,759
Speaker 1: to upset people. Anyway. I wanted to break up with her,

1002
00:47:44,760 --> 00:47:46,680
Speaker 1: but I knew it was going to be difficult. She

1003
00:47:46,840 --> 00:47:49,840
Speaker 1: is good at talking me into stuff, but my mind

1004
00:47:50,160 --> 00:47:53,120
Speaker 1: was made up one hundred percent good. I was not

1005
00:47:53,200 --> 00:47:56,959
Speaker 1: sure how or when to do it, though. I felt

1006
00:47:56,960 --> 00:48:00,680
Speaker 1: really anxious about it. And there's a seven day updates.

1007
00:48:00,760 --> 00:48:02,560
Speaker 7: I mean, guests, seven days later, you did it.

1008
00:48:02,719 --> 00:48:04,839
Speaker 1: Here's how you break up with her? Yeah, yo, we're done,

1009
00:48:04,880 --> 00:48:07,040
Speaker 1: we're breaking up, and you mean to.

1010
00:48:07,000 --> 00:48:09,960
Speaker 7: Me you see the fan babe was never a fase.

1011
00:48:10,160 --> 00:48:14,200
Speaker 1: You're another lady's babe. And I'm pretty sure that gold

1012
00:48:14,360 --> 00:48:17,319
Speaker 1: ring that you have that lights up when you put

1013
00:48:17,320 --> 00:48:21,000
Speaker 1: it in the fire is actually the one ring and

1014
00:48:21,400 --> 00:48:24,319
Speaker 1: you are saar On, the Deceiver, the evilest man of

1015
00:48:24,360 --> 00:48:25,000
Speaker 1: all the land.

1016
00:48:25,440 --> 00:48:26,280
Speaker 4: True.

1017
00:48:26,400 --> 00:48:30,120
Speaker 7: I knew it seven days later, So long and good night.

1018
00:48:30,600 --> 00:48:33,080
Speaker 1: Some things I want to address first. I work at

1019
00:48:33,080 --> 00:48:35,960
Speaker 1: the same place I have done for years because of

1020
00:48:35,960 --> 00:48:38,239
Speaker 1: my anxiety. I know how to do everything at my

1021
00:48:38,320 --> 00:48:40,480
Speaker 1: job and it helps me feel grounded and not worry.

1022
00:48:40,880 --> 00:48:42,759
Speaker 1: And I said I'm basically a manager. I meant that

1023
00:48:42,800 --> 00:48:45,799
Speaker 1: I sometimes fill in shifts and responsibilities for them, and

1024
00:48:45,840 --> 00:48:48,799
Speaker 1: we have talked about me officially being manager before, but

1025
00:48:48,880 --> 00:48:51,040
Speaker 1: it's not what I want. I don't want to take

1026
00:48:51,080 --> 00:48:52,799
Speaker 1: my work home with me and never be able to

1027
00:48:52,800 --> 00:48:55,960
Speaker 1: switch off like I see some of them do. That said,

1028
00:48:56,040 --> 00:48:57,759
Speaker 1: I do want to have some more ambition in my

1029
00:48:57,800 --> 00:48:59,759
Speaker 1: life going forward, and I'm going to be looking at

1030
00:48:59,800 --> 00:49:03,400
Speaker 1: other ventures. My clothes, my band clothes are now back

1031
00:49:03,520 --> 00:49:06,000
Speaker 1: at my house. I still have the new clothes we

1032
00:49:06,080 --> 00:49:07,920
Speaker 1: bought as I paid for a lot of them, and

1033
00:49:07,960 --> 00:49:10,640
Speaker 1: I planned to continue wearing them too. I could see

1034
00:49:10,640 --> 00:49:13,600
Speaker 1: what she meant by wanting me to wear new clothes.

1035
00:49:13,760 --> 00:49:16,080
Speaker 1: I just don't like her end goal or the way

1036
00:49:16,080 --> 00:49:18,360
Speaker 1: she went about it. For the people who think I

1037
00:49:18,520 --> 00:49:21,520
Speaker 1: dressed like these goth people dancing under a bridge, I

1038
00:49:21,719 --> 00:49:24,440
Speaker 1: do not. It is usually just a band, tea or

1039
00:49:24,480 --> 00:49:26,880
Speaker 1: jumper with some normal genes. I'm not a teenager, just

1040
00:49:26,880 --> 00:49:29,720
Speaker 1: a thirty year old who still loves the same band. Okay,

1041
00:49:29,760 --> 00:49:33,160
Speaker 1: so now the main story. I took advice from some responses.

1042
00:49:33,200 --> 00:49:35,759
Speaker 1: We lived separately, so there was no lease issues, but

1043
00:49:35,800 --> 00:49:38,120
Speaker 1: I did change my lock since I had given her

1044
00:49:38,160 --> 00:49:40,160
Speaker 1: a key a few months ago. As for the breakup,

1045
00:49:40,200 --> 00:49:42,880
Speaker 1: it did not go well, but it did go at least.

1046
00:49:43,360 --> 00:49:44,799
Speaker 1: I was at home thinking of how to do it,

1047
00:49:44,840 --> 00:49:47,319
Speaker 1: which cafe or restaurant I would do it in, and

1048
00:49:47,360 --> 00:49:49,960
Speaker 1: she finished work and came to mind without prior discussion,

1049
00:49:50,080 --> 00:49:53,240
Speaker 1: which isn't unusual for her. She could tell something was off,

1050
00:49:53,480 --> 00:49:55,400
Speaker 1: and since I had been thinking about it for hours,

1051
00:49:55,440 --> 00:49:57,800
Speaker 1: I was one hundred and fifty percent sure I wanted

1052
00:49:57,840 --> 00:49:59,960
Speaker 1: to do it, so I just did it at home.

1053
00:50:00,640 --> 00:50:02,760
Speaker 1: I told her I had lied about donating my clothes,

1054
00:50:02,800 --> 00:50:06,080
Speaker 1: and I had taken into work instead. She was angry

1055
00:50:06,080 --> 00:50:08,880
Speaker 1: and called me a liar, which is what she is.

1056
00:50:09,600 --> 00:50:10,279
Speaker 4: Yeah.

1057
00:50:10,360 --> 00:50:13,040
Speaker 1: I apologized and explained that I felt a lot of

1058
00:50:13,080 --> 00:50:15,319
Speaker 1: unfair pressure to get rid of them when I did

1059
00:50:15,320 --> 00:50:18,520
Speaker 1: not really want to and my collection wasn't hurting anyone.

1060
00:50:18,760 --> 00:50:20,719
Speaker 1: I did not feel the argument was fair and feel

1061
00:50:20,800 --> 00:50:23,000
Speaker 1: she made me lie. But I hate saying stuff like that,

1062
00:50:23,080 --> 00:50:25,319
Speaker 1: so I left it alone. Then I told her I

1063
00:50:25,360 --> 00:50:28,080
Speaker 1: was really annoyed about her calling my boss. She said

1064
00:50:28,160 --> 00:50:30,400
Speaker 1: she was sorry, but I should be a manager, and

1065
00:50:30,440 --> 00:50:33,960
Speaker 1: I said that was okay. She looked confused but accepted it.

1066
00:50:34,320 --> 00:50:35,880
Speaker 1: Then I said I don't want to be with her

1067
00:50:35,880 --> 00:50:38,960
Speaker 1: anymore and I wanted her to leave. Heck, yeah, yeah,

1068
00:50:39,360 --> 00:50:41,279
Speaker 1: I said my mind was made up and technically we

1069
00:50:41,360 --> 00:50:44,120
Speaker 1: already had broken up. She called me pathetic as she

1070
00:50:44,200 --> 00:50:45,640
Speaker 1: walked out and slammed the door.

1071
00:50:45,840 --> 00:50:46,200
Speaker 3: Nice.

1072
00:50:47,440 --> 00:50:53,160
Speaker 1: Hey, boing whip, boing whip, that's your words, bouncing off

1073
00:50:53,200 --> 00:50:55,520
Speaker 1: of me and sticking to you. I sent her a

1074
00:50:55,560 --> 00:50:57,799
Speaker 1: message about picking up her stuff. There's not much here,

1075
00:50:57,800 --> 00:50:59,879
Speaker 1: so maybe she doesn't want to. I called my boss

1076
00:51:00,080 --> 00:51:02,640
Speaker 1: explain the situation and be wary of contact from her.

1077
00:51:03,120 --> 00:51:05,720
Speaker 1: We have worked together for years and our good friends,

1078
00:51:05,760 --> 00:51:07,680
Speaker 1: so he was understanding and said he would help if

1079
00:51:07,680 --> 00:51:10,480
Speaker 1: I needed it. As for me, I do want to

1080
00:51:10,520 --> 00:51:13,120
Speaker 1: work on myself a bit, partly because of things she said,

1081
00:51:13,160 --> 00:51:15,440
Speaker 1: but not for the same reasons, just for me to

1082
00:51:15,480 --> 00:51:18,280
Speaker 1: grow a bit in terms of work experience and fashion sense.

1083
00:51:18,640 --> 00:51:21,279
Speaker 1: I will be buying more smart casual clothes to wear

1084
00:51:21,320 --> 00:51:23,800
Speaker 1: as well. I don't think I will ever fully stop

1085
00:51:23,960 --> 00:51:28,880
Speaker 1: wearing band clothes. I am feeling weird, but okay. It

1086
00:51:28,920 --> 00:51:32,160
Speaker 1: feels great to have acted decisively. I've not felt sad

1087
00:51:32,239 --> 00:51:35,400
Speaker 1: yet nor happy either, just relieved. Mostly. Some of her

1088
00:51:35,440 --> 00:51:37,400
Speaker 1: stuff is still here, and it feels weird to see it,

1089
00:51:37,480 --> 00:51:39,520
Speaker 1: knowing it will never be that way again. It's okay.

1090
00:51:39,600 --> 00:51:47,640
Speaker 1: She sucked, broad, stunk, stinky, Oh shoo wee.

1091
00:51:47,680 --> 00:51:49,279
Speaker 6: I was gonna say the only positive thing she did

1092
00:51:49,360 --> 00:51:52,880
Speaker 6: was like kind of expand your warning, but like in

1093
00:51:52,920 --> 00:51:54,040
Speaker 6: a negative way.

1094
00:51:55,640 --> 00:51:57,840
Speaker 1: I do not know how to describe the feeling. I

1095
00:51:57,880 --> 00:52:00,479
Speaker 1: have spoken to friends about it and will be seeing soon.

1096
00:52:01,040 --> 00:52:02,880
Speaker 1: I do not know what she has been up to

1097
00:52:03,160 --> 00:52:05,040
Speaker 1: or what she will do. I'm not sure if I

1098
00:52:05,080 --> 00:52:07,920
Speaker 1: want to. There's nothing left for me with her anyway.

1099
00:52:08,160 --> 00:52:10,080
Speaker 1: Thank you to everyone for the kind words. It felt

1100
00:52:10,120 --> 00:52:11,880
Speaker 1: good to know I was not being treated fairly and

1101
00:52:12,040 --> 00:52:15,120
Speaker 1: was not being stupid, like she said. Some even messaged

1102
00:52:15,160 --> 00:52:17,040
Speaker 1: me with similar stuff or how much they liked their

1103
00:52:17,040 --> 00:52:20,120
Speaker 1: partners with similar habits to my band clothes, which was

1104
00:52:20,160 --> 00:52:22,640
Speaker 1: really nice. You're gonna you can find someone who just

1105
00:52:22,760 --> 00:52:26,080
Speaker 1: likes you for you, dude. That's yeah, like you know

1106
00:52:26,840 --> 00:52:29,160
Speaker 1: that really is the key. It's like sure, like wanting

1107
00:52:29,160 --> 00:52:32,120
Speaker 1: to change someone's fashion sense is one thing, but like

1108
00:52:32,239 --> 00:52:34,920
Speaker 1: being like, yeah, the stuff that you like is pathetic

1109
00:52:34,960 --> 00:52:37,560
Speaker 1: and dumb. It's soll dude.

1110
00:52:37,719 --> 00:52:41,520
Speaker 4: Like your partner can influence you to do to expand

1111
00:52:41,680 --> 00:52:44,560
Speaker 4: your worldview, but the second that they're just calling you

1112
00:52:44,680 --> 00:52:45,880
Speaker 4: dumb and stupid.

1113
00:52:46,160 --> 00:52:47,839
Speaker 1: And I think you do need to get a diet.

1114
00:52:48,040 --> 00:52:49,919
Speaker 1: I mean, it sounds like you have something. You said

1115
00:52:49,960 --> 00:52:51,719
Speaker 1: people you know you have anxiety. I don't know if

1116
00:52:51,760 --> 00:52:54,279
Speaker 1: that's self diagnosed or not. You said that there's people

1117
00:52:54,280 --> 00:52:56,520
Speaker 1: around you that think you might have OCD. I think

1118
00:52:56,520 --> 00:52:59,640
Speaker 1: you should just go get that, you know, go get

1119
00:52:59,640 --> 00:53:04,120
Speaker 1: screen for that so you can figure out how to manage,

1120
00:53:04,640 --> 00:53:07,040
Speaker 1: you know, your day to day existence.

1121
00:53:07,400 --> 00:53:11,759
Speaker 6: You know, also get a raise, get a raise, get

1122
00:53:11,800 --> 00:53:14,400
Speaker 6: a raise, hike servant if you've been there for.

1123
00:53:14,600 --> 00:53:18,000
Speaker 1: I get a raise there for almost two decades. One

1124
00:53:18,040 --> 00:53:20,560
Speaker 1: reason I still wear the band tees is sometimes other

1125
00:53:20,640 --> 00:53:23,880
Speaker 1: fans spot them and we have a nice conversation and

1126
00:53:23,960 --> 00:53:27,280
Speaker 1: always end up smiling. It is just nice.

1127
00:53:27,400 --> 00:53:29,040
Speaker 4: That's how I feel when I wear my forty nine

1128
00:53:29,120 --> 00:53:31,799
Speaker 4: ers jersey. All the forty nine ers come up to me.

1129
00:53:32,360 --> 00:53:34,359
Speaker 7: All forty nine of them, all forty nine of them.

1130
00:53:34,760 --> 00:53:36,480
Speaker 4: Know, all the forty nine er fans come up to

1131
00:53:36,480 --> 00:53:39,680
Speaker 4: me and they're like, oh, look, yeah, and then they

1132
00:53:39,680 --> 00:53:42,560
Speaker 4: start asking me questions about I feel like I'm being

1133
00:53:42,600 --> 00:53:45,240
Speaker 4: tested every time I wear it. Literally, they come up from.

1134
00:53:45,239 --> 00:53:48,160
Speaker 1: Like, you're living a BlimE, You're living a like favorite.

1135
00:53:51,080 --> 00:53:53,440
Speaker 7: I already, I already gave you your cheat sheet.

1136
00:53:53,600 --> 00:53:53,880
Speaker 1: I know.

1137
00:53:53,920 --> 00:53:57,359
Speaker 4: I tell them that. Okay, Okay, they don't ask all

1138
00:53:57,480 --> 00:53:58,800
Speaker 4: up questions, but it's.

1139
00:53:58,680 --> 00:54:00,759
Speaker 7: Just hard and they give you high five. I get

1140
00:54:00,760 --> 00:54:01,760
Speaker 7: you your life.

1141
00:54:02,080 --> 00:54:05,480
Speaker 1: I liked Joe Montana better on the Chiefs. And that's

1142
00:54:05,520 --> 00:54:07,120
Speaker 1: the end of this story. We're gonna go on to

1143
00:54:07,160 --> 00:54:10,000
Speaker 1: the next one. John here og host, We're gonna get

1144
00:54:10,000 --> 00:54:11,839
Speaker 1: back to these stories, but a quick three minute break

1145
00:54:11,840 --> 00:54:13,040
Speaker 1: from as from our sponsors.

1146
00:54:13,520 --> 00:54:16,480
Speaker 4: My girlfriend lied about having lunch with co workers, but

1147
00:54:16,560 --> 00:54:18,080
Speaker 4: now she's the angry one.

1148
00:54:18,160 --> 00:54:20,840
Speaker 1: Yeah, angry that she got caught in a lie.

1149
00:54:21,120 --> 00:54:23,200
Speaker 4: So my girlfriend texted me and that she was going

1150
00:54:23,239 --> 00:54:25,440
Speaker 4: out to lunch with a group of friends to celebrate

1151
00:54:25,480 --> 00:54:29,840
Speaker 4: two interns finishing their internship this Friday. I said, cool,

1152
00:54:30,360 --> 00:54:33,600
Speaker 4: have fun. They work in downtown Denver, where there are

1153
00:54:33,719 --> 00:54:36,840
Speaker 4: hundreds of restaurants and bars to walk to from work,

1154
00:54:37,480 --> 00:54:40,560
Speaker 4: but they decided to go to a restaurant like forty

1155
00:54:40,640 --> 00:54:44,600
Speaker 4: minutes away from work, so they drove to the restaurant.

1156
00:54:44,880 --> 00:54:45,279
Speaker 1: By the way.

1157
00:54:45,320 --> 00:54:47,279
Speaker 4: This comes from Jazz to Live and if you want

1158
00:54:47,280 --> 00:54:49,680
Speaker 4: to smit your own stories, go to the r slash Okay, storytime,

1159
00:54:49,719 --> 00:54:50,120
Speaker 4: separate it.

1160
00:54:50,280 --> 00:54:53,000
Speaker 7: I'm Sophia, I'm Dakota, I'm Keon, and.

1161
00:54:52,960 --> 00:54:54,799
Speaker 4: We're here to give good advice. Goofley, but we don't

1162
00:54:54,840 --> 00:54:57,560
Speaker 4: have all the answers really know what we'd do, so

1163
00:54:57,640 --> 00:54:59,440
Speaker 4: let us know what you would do in the comments.

1164
00:55:00,040 --> 00:55:02,759
Speaker 4: And no, he says. Thirty minutes past and I get

1165
00:55:02,800 --> 00:55:06,560
Speaker 4: a call from a friend. She says, hey, I just

1166
00:55:06,680 --> 00:55:10,759
Speaker 4: saw your girl eating lunch with some older guy. I

1167
00:55:10,920 --> 00:55:14,400
Speaker 4: replied and told her, oh, yeah, she's out with some coworkers.

1168
00:55:15,160 --> 00:55:20,640
Speaker 4: Then my friend's like, no, it's just her and some guy.

1169
00:55:21,360 --> 00:55:24,600
Speaker 4: So I start to text my girlfriend asking how lunch

1170
00:55:24,719 --> 00:55:27,319
Speaker 4: is going and who all went, and she tells me, well,

1171
00:55:27,400 --> 00:55:30,239
Speaker 4: the two interns and like four other people. I was like,

1172
00:55:30,719 --> 00:55:31,440
Speaker 4: are you sure?

1173
00:55:32,200 --> 00:55:34,399
Speaker 1: Are you sure about that? And she said yes.

1174
00:55:34,719 --> 00:55:37,120
Speaker 4: Why I tell her that I just got a call

1175
00:55:37,239 --> 00:55:40,120
Speaker 4: from a friend and described her and her guy friend

1176
00:55:40,600 --> 00:55:43,320
Speaker 4: and that it is only two of them. She tries

1177
00:55:43,400 --> 00:55:47,120
Speaker 4: to backtrack and says, oh, yeah, the other people ditched us.

1178
00:55:47,760 --> 00:55:51,399
Speaker 4: I told her, stop lying. You and this other guy

1179
00:55:51,440 --> 00:55:53,640
Speaker 4: were the only ones going out to eat from the beginning,

1180
00:55:53,640 --> 00:55:55,520
Speaker 4: and you made up. The whole story is of cover up.

1181
00:55:56,080 --> 00:55:58,040
Speaker 4: And she tried to blame me and said that she

1182
00:55:58,520 --> 00:56:00,799
Speaker 4: did not believe that a friend of mind called and

1183
00:56:00,840 --> 00:56:03,600
Speaker 4: that I was following her and I was a creeper

1184
00:56:03,640 --> 00:56:08,160
Speaker 4: and a liar. I was like, please, he got caught

1185
00:56:08,719 --> 00:56:11,080
Speaker 4: and now you're trying to blame me for it, and no,

1186
00:56:11,200 --> 00:56:13,840
Speaker 4: I did not follow you, So stop with the lying.

1187
00:56:14,680 --> 00:56:17,600
Speaker 4: My specific question, I feel like my girl is either

1188
00:56:17,680 --> 00:56:19,719
Speaker 4: cheating on me or she was just too scared to

1189
00:56:19,719 --> 00:56:21,239
Speaker 4: tell me that she was going out to lunch with

1190
00:56:21,280 --> 00:56:23,799
Speaker 4: a male coworker. What do you think I should do?

1191
00:56:24,480 --> 00:56:27,080
Speaker 4: By the way, we've been together for seven years and

1192
00:56:27,120 --> 00:56:28,480
Speaker 4: have a four year old daughter.

1193
00:56:28,800 --> 00:56:32,200
Speaker 1: Well, uh, that makes it a little more complicated. I

1194
00:56:32,239 --> 00:56:35,680
Speaker 1: think it's incredibly telling that she immediately tried to make

1195
00:56:35,719 --> 00:56:39,480
Speaker 1: you sound like an insane stalker ye for calling her

1196
00:56:39,560 --> 00:56:40,400
Speaker 1: out on a lie.

1197
00:56:40,640 --> 00:56:43,320
Speaker 4: Yeah, she lied to you. I think she is cheating

1198
00:56:43,320 --> 00:56:43,560
Speaker 4: on you.

1199
00:56:43,680 --> 00:56:45,879
Speaker 1: Yeah. That makes me feel like the reason she did

1200
00:56:45,880 --> 00:56:48,839
Speaker 1: that is because she has a very very very very

1201
00:56:48,880 --> 00:56:49,560
Speaker 1: good reason too.

1202
00:56:50,320 --> 00:56:51,440
Speaker 7: That's what I think.

1203
00:56:52,239 --> 00:56:54,319
Speaker 4: Why did she have to lie about it and then

1204
00:56:54,440 --> 00:56:57,279
Speaker 4: try to blame me for it? Here is a follow up.

1205
00:56:57,719 --> 00:57:00,399
Speaker 4: Thank you for all the support. It really helps reading

1206
00:57:00,400 --> 00:57:02,560
Speaker 4: all the feedback so I could honestly say that when

1207
00:57:02,600 --> 00:57:05,879
Speaker 4: we first met, I was not ready for a relationship.

1208
00:57:06,280 --> 00:57:08,440
Speaker 4: I had been single for three years and I was

1209
00:57:08,480 --> 00:57:11,400
Speaker 4: having fun. But on the other hand, my girlfriend had

1210
00:57:11,400 --> 00:57:14,680
Speaker 4: been single only a month before we got together. In

1211
00:57:14,719 --> 00:57:16,840
Speaker 4: her own words, she fell in love with me the

1212
00:57:16,920 --> 00:57:20,080
Speaker 4: first time she saw me. The first years were very good.

1213
00:57:20,560 --> 00:57:22,919
Speaker 4: Even though I did not want to be in a relationship,

1214
00:57:23,000 --> 00:57:26,800
Speaker 4: I still respected my girlfriend and treated her with respect.

1215
00:57:27,360 --> 00:57:29,120
Speaker 4: There were a few times that I wanted to end

1216
00:57:29,160 --> 00:57:33,040
Speaker 4: the relationship because my girlfriend was very insecure and jealous.

1217
00:57:33,320 --> 00:57:35,640
Speaker 4: I could not talk to any girls at work or

1218
00:57:35,680 --> 00:57:37,960
Speaker 4: anywhere because she would think I was trying to cheat.

1219
00:57:38,480 --> 00:57:38,920
Speaker 1: Yikes.

1220
00:57:39,440 --> 00:57:41,480
Speaker 4: I couldn't even eat lunch with one of my friends

1221
00:57:41,480 --> 00:57:44,200
Speaker 4: from work because some of his friends, who were girls,

1222
00:57:44,600 --> 00:57:47,200
Speaker 4: would stop by and talk to us, and once again,

1223
00:57:47,320 --> 00:57:49,760
Speaker 4: my girlfriend would get jealous and think I was cheating.

1224
00:57:49,960 --> 00:57:54,560
Speaker 1: So break up, great snakes, mister Tintin, break up. This

1225
00:57:55,240 --> 00:57:58,320
Speaker 1: is projection one oh one. Oh yeah, she's worried about

1226
00:57:58,360 --> 00:58:01,640
Speaker 1: every single person you talk to because she knows that

1227
00:58:01,680 --> 00:58:04,360
Speaker 1: she is down to cheat, which means she assumes you

1228
00:58:04,400 --> 00:58:05,680
Speaker 1: are as well. Yep.

1229
00:58:06,200 --> 00:58:08,240
Speaker 4: I do have to admit that my girlfriend was the

1230
00:58:08,280 --> 00:58:12,200
Speaker 4: glue to our relationship because anytime I wanted to break up,

1231
00:58:12,280 --> 00:58:14,560
Speaker 4: she was stubborn and would not give up on us.

1232
00:58:14,680 --> 00:58:16,720
Speaker 4: She would do all kind of nice things for me.

1233
00:58:16,960 --> 00:58:19,439
Speaker 4: She even bought me a boxer puppy, which she found

1234
00:58:19,480 --> 00:58:22,320
Speaker 4: out was my favorite breed. Later I found out she

1235
00:58:22,320 --> 00:58:24,040
Speaker 4: bought the puppy so that we could stay together.

1236
00:58:24,160 --> 00:58:27,280
Speaker 7: Wow, that one was obvious, right, Oh I.

1237
00:58:27,240 --> 00:58:29,680
Speaker 1: Never think already, did you? So? I guess that was

1238
00:58:29,720 --> 00:58:32,440
Speaker 1: before you had the baby, right yeah? Did you have

1239
00:58:32,560 --> 00:58:34,320
Speaker 1: the baby so you'd stay together?

1240
00:58:34,480 --> 00:58:34,640
Speaker 7: Oh?

1241
00:58:34,680 --> 00:58:37,400
Speaker 1: Yeah, no, terrible. Uh.

1242
00:58:37,440 --> 00:58:39,920
Speaker 4: I never thought my girlfriend would cheat on me or

1243
00:58:40,000 --> 00:58:42,880
Speaker 4: even think of doing something like that. She was so

1244
00:58:42,960 --> 00:58:44,960
Speaker 4: in love with me that I didn't even have to try.

1245
00:58:45,760 --> 00:58:49,040
Speaker 4: All seven years together, I thought we were good. Until

1246
00:58:49,080 --> 00:58:51,680
Speaker 4: twenty twenty four. You literally just told us that you

1247
00:58:51,760 --> 00:58:53,680
Speaker 4: try to break up with her multiple times. That's not good.

1248
00:58:53,840 --> 00:58:56,360
Speaker 4: She had just gotten promoted and was making more money

1249
00:58:56,360 --> 00:59:00,640
Speaker 4: than I was. Things started to change. She started which

1250
00:59:00,640 --> 00:59:03,160
Speaker 4: she had never done with me. She started smoking the

1251
00:59:03,200 --> 00:59:06,040
Speaker 4: Devil's let us every single day. It did not bother

1252
00:59:06,200 --> 00:59:07,920
Speaker 4: me since I would do it once in a while,

1253
00:59:08,080 --> 00:59:09,720
Speaker 4: but then she would go out with one of her

1254
00:59:09,760 --> 00:59:13,560
Speaker 4: girlfriends that also smoked the Devil's let Us. They would

1255
00:59:13,560 --> 00:59:16,840
Speaker 4: go out every Friday from eight pm to midnight smoking

1256
00:59:17,040 --> 00:59:18,560
Speaker 4: the Devil's lettuce at the park.

1257
00:59:19,200 --> 00:59:20,600
Speaker 1: What are we fourteen?

1258
00:59:21,640 --> 00:59:23,800
Speaker 4: I felt like she was acting better than I was.

1259
00:59:24,280 --> 00:59:27,520
Speaker 4: She really did not need me at all. She started

1260
00:59:27,520 --> 00:59:29,959
Speaker 4: going out with her friends, even though the first six

1261
00:59:30,080 --> 00:59:32,200
Speaker 4: years she would not go out a single time with

1262
00:59:32,240 --> 00:59:34,520
Speaker 4: her friends because she would rather stay home and chill.

1263
00:59:35,320 --> 00:59:37,960
Speaker 4: I also stayed home because I felt bad that she

1264
00:59:38,000 --> 00:59:40,640
Speaker 4: would not go out with her friends, so I didn't

1265
00:59:40,640 --> 00:59:43,000
Speaker 4: think it was fair for me to do so. In

1266
00:59:43,080 --> 00:59:45,440
Speaker 4: twenty twenty four, the beginning of January is when she

1267
00:59:45,520 --> 00:59:48,000
Speaker 4: told me that she was not happy in the relationship,

1268
00:59:48,480 --> 00:59:51,320
Speaker 4: but that she wanted to work things out. She wanted

1269
00:59:51,360 --> 00:59:55,520
Speaker 4: to help out more with our baby, stop watching sports

1270
00:59:55,560 --> 00:59:57,880
Speaker 4: or TV, and spend more time with her and the baby.

1271
00:59:58,320 --> 01:00:00,360
Speaker 4: I thought I was doing enough, but I I guess

1272
01:00:00,360 --> 01:00:03,840
Speaker 4: I was wrong. I cut the cable, I started hanging

1273
01:00:03,880 --> 01:00:06,080
Speaker 4: out with them more and taking our daughter to the park.

1274
01:00:06,520 --> 01:00:09,400
Speaker 4: I cleaned the house while she cooked. I even did

1275
01:00:09,440 --> 01:00:13,160
Speaker 4: our daughter's laundry. I say, even while I was doing

1276
01:00:13,240 --> 01:00:16,080
Speaker 4: all these new things and trying to make our relationship better,

1277
01:00:16,440 --> 01:00:19,720
Speaker 4: I found out that she was texting a coworker every

1278
01:00:19,840 --> 01:00:25,040
Speaker 4: single day from Monday through Friday, from seven thirty am

1279
01:00:25,080 --> 01:00:28,360
Speaker 4: when she would start work, to three thirty pm when

1280
01:00:28,360 --> 01:00:31,080
Speaker 4: she would get off work. This started in the middle

1281
01:00:31,120 --> 01:00:35,240
Speaker 4: of January until April twelfth, twenty twenty four. The only

1282
01:00:35,320 --> 01:00:37,720
Speaker 4: reason I found out about it in March twenty twenty

1283
01:00:37,760 --> 01:00:40,920
Speaker 4: four was because we had an argument March twenty third.

1284
01:00:41,680 --> 01:00:44,480
Speaker 4: Before the big argument, on March twentieth, I was helping

1285
01:00:44,480 --> 01:00:46,400
Speaker 4: her with a work project that she had to do

1286
01:00:46,440 --> 01:00:49,280
Speaker 4: a presentation on. I helped her a few times, and

1287
01:00:49,320 --> 01:00:51,880
Speaker 4: on the twentieth of March she asked me again to

1288
01:00:51,960 --> 01:00:54,960
Speaker 4: help her late at night, and I was like, in

1289
01:00:55,160 --> 01:00:58,720
Speaker 4: now I'm tired and I'm going to bed. Besides, we

1290
01:00:58,840 --> 01:01:01,120
Speaker 4: practiced so many times, and I believe you are ready

1291
01:01:01,120 --> 01:01:04,040
Speaker 4: for it. I saw her get upset and annoyed, so

1292
01:01:04,080 --> 01:01:06,280
Speaker 4: I decided to help her out, but she was still

1293
01:01:06,280 --> 01:01:09,720
Speaker 4: mad at me. Then on the next day, March twenty first,

1294
01:01:10,000 --> 01:01:12,280
Speaker 4: she did not communicate with me that she was going

1295
01:01:12,280 --> 01:01:14,840
Speaker 4: to go out with her friends and that I had

1296
01:01:14,840 --> 01:01:17,200
Speaker 4: to watch our baby. I was not mad that she

1297
01:01:17,320 --> 01:01:19,360
Speaker 4: was going out. I was more upset that she had

1298
01:01:19,360 --> 01:01:22,160
Speaker 4: not given me a heads up. Then on the twenty

1299
01:01:22,200 --> 01:01:25,080
Speaker 4: second of March, she decided at the last minute she

1300
01:01:25,160 --> 01:01:27,120
Speaker 4: was going to hang out with one of her friends

1301
01:01:27,160 --> 01:01:29,360
Speaker 4: and her kids. She asked me if I wanted to

1302
01:01:29,400 --> 01:01:31,840
Speaker 4: go out with them, but I said no because it

1303
01:01:31,920 --> 01:01:34,480
Speaker 4: was only going to be her friend and two kids

1304
01:01:34,960 --> 01:01:37,640
Speaker 4: and her friend's mom and my girlfriend and our daughter.

1305
01:01:38,080 --> 01:01:40,960
Speaker 4: So I stayed home and chilled. I later found out

1306
01:01:41,000 --> 01:01:43,680
Speaker 4: that she was mad because I didn't go with them.

1307
01:01:43,840 --> 01:01:47,480
Speaker 1: I mean, why wouldn't you go with them? I understand

1308
01:01:47,480 --> 01:01:49,560
Speaker 1: being a little frustrated. It's like, yeah, you didn't just

1309
01:01:49,600 --> 01:01:52,640
Speaker 1: like go somewhere as a family for no other reason

1310
01:01:52,680 --> 01:01:56,320
Speaker 1: than to just chill. That seems kind of annoy Oh.

1311
01:01:56,400 --> 01:01:58,800
Speaker 1: I don't know, man, all of this sounds a little.

1312
01:02:00,240 --> 01:02:03,800
Speaker 4: Like and then Wayopie says. I told her the reason

1313
01:02:03,840 --> 01:02:05,680
Speaker 4: I didn't go was because I was going to be

1314
01:02:05,720 --> 01:02:08,160
Speaker 4: the only male and it would be best if it

1315
01:02:08,200 --> 01:02:09,080
Speaker 4: was just Then.

1316
01:02:09,360 --> 01:02:10,720
Speaker 1: Are you afraid of women?

1317
01:02:11,480 --> 01:02:12,600
Speaker 4: What's the problem, dude?

1318
01:02:12,760 --> 01:02:15,400
Speaker 1: Yeah? Like what's going like? I don't get it going

1319
01:02:15,440 --> 01:02:18,960
Speaker 1: with your kid? Yeah? Like, what's the what's the issue?

1320
01:02:19,000 --> 01:02:19,800
Speaker 1: What's the big deal?

1321
01:02:20,520 --> 01:02:22,360
Speaker 4: March twenty third, during the middle of the day, she

1322
01:02:22,400 --> 01:02:25,400
Speaker 4: started saying some things which I thought were very disrespectful

1323
01:02:25,400 --> 01:02:27,560
Speaker 4: to me. I called her out on it, and she

1324
01:02:27,760 --> 01:02:29,919
Speaker 4: just blew up and told me that she was done

1325
01:02:29,960 --> 01:02:32,520
Speaker 4: with our relationship. She said she was bet up with

1326
01:02:32,560 --> 01:02:35,479
Speaker 4: me not really helping out, supporting her career, not hanging

1327
01:02:35,520 --> 01:02:37,920
Speaker 4: out with her friends, and not being the cuddling type.

1328
01:02:38,560 --> 01:02:41,240
Speaker 4: I was so upset that I even said, fine, we

1329
01:02:41,280 --> 01:02:41,880
Speaker 4: are done.

1330
01:02:42,280 --> 01:02:45,680
Speaker 1: Well. It sounds like you guys are just not really

1331
01:02:45,880 --> 01:02:49,040
Speaker 1: syncd up properly, you know, y yep, yep. I mean

1332
01:02:50,520 --> 01:02:54,480
Speaker 1: her probably cheating on you is definitely not cool. No,

1333
01:02:54,800 --> 01:02:56,600
Speaker 1: but it sounds like this hasn't been cool for a

1334
01:02:56,600 --> 01:02:57,080
Speaker 1: long time.

1335
01:02:57,440 --> 01:02:59,640
Speaker 4: We really did not talk or hang out the rest

1336
01:02:59,640 --> 01:03:02,160
Speaker 4: of the weeknd On Monday, I went to get our

1337
01:03:02,200 --> 01:03:05,440
Speaker 4: mail and I opened up our phone bill, and that

1338
01:03:05,600 --> 01:03:08,120
Speaker 4: is when I discovered that she had been texting a

1339
01:03:08,200 --> 01:03:10,960
Speaker 4: coworker for a few months. I told her that she

1340
01:03:11,040 --> 01:03:14,000
Speaker 4: was having an emotional affair, but she denied it. It

1341
01:03:14,120 --> 01:03:15,880
Speaker 4: was someone in her team who was a little bit

1342
01:03:15,920 --> 01:03:18,280
Speaker 4: higher position than her. He lives out on the East

1343
01:03:18,320 --> 01:03:21,120
Speaker 4: Coast with his wife and two kids. I wasn't really

1344
01:03:21,160 --> 01:03:23,200
Speaker 4: worried about it because he lived out on the East

1345
01:03:23,200 --> 01:03:25,760
Speaker 4: Coast while we were in Denver, Colorado, but I was

1346
01:03:25,800 --> 01:03:28,320
Speaker 4: worried about how many times they were texting each other.

1347
01:03:28,960 --> 01:03:31,280
Speaker 4: It reminded me of when we first got together and

1348
01:03:31,320 --> 01:03:33,960
Speaker 4: were texting every day like we were in high school. Again.

1349
01:03:34,400 --> 01:03:36,760
Speaker 4: She kept telling me that it wasn't an emotional affair

1350
01:03:36,880 --> 01:03:39,680
Speaker 4: and that all they talked about was work, his kids,

1351
01:03:39,720 --> 01:03:41,880
Speaker 4: the things he would like to do after work in sports,

1352
01:03:42,480 --> 01:03:45,440
Speaker 4: which she never talked to me about. I told her

1353
01:03:45,480 --> 01:03:48,120
Speaker 4: that I really did not feel comfortable with the situation.

1354
01:03:49,000 --> 01:03:51,800
Speaker 4: I understood they worked in the same team and would talk.

1355
01:03:52,440 --> 01:03:54,080
Speaker 4: I told her that I was okay with that as

1356
01:03:54,080 --> 01:03:57,480
Speaker 4: long as they did not talk about personal things. You

1357
01:03:57,560 --> 01:04:00,000
Speaker 4: promised that she would stop talking to him or text

1358
01:04:00,920 --> 01:04:04,240
Speaker 4: and that she would keep the conversation professional and work related.

1359
01:04:04,680 --> 01:04:07,560
Speaker 4: Two weeks past, and once again I discovered that she

1360
01:04:07,640 --> 01:04:11,080
Speaker 4: had been talking to him about personal things, and I

1361
01:04:11,120 --> 01:04:15,040
Speaker 4: was like, I'm done. I have lost trust in you.

1362
01:04:15,640 --> 01:04:18,400
Speaker 4: She apologized and once again promised that this would not

1363
01:04:18,520 --> 01:04:21,240
Speaker 4: happen again. Ever, since I lost trust in her, I

1364
01:04:21,280 --> 01:04:23,760
Speaker 4: started to question her, like how come you do not

1365
01:04:23,960 --> 01:04:26,760
Speaker 4: text me back right away like you used to? Or

1366
01:04:26,800 --> 01:04:29,440
Speaker 4: how come you changed your work schedule? Or why does

1367
01:04:29,480 --> 01:04:31,400
Speaker 4: it take you longer to get to work when it

1368
01:04:31,480 --> 01:04:34,080
Speaker 4: usually would take us like thirty to forty five minutes.

1369
01:04:34,560 --> 01:04:37,000
Speaker 4: She got fed up very quickly with me asking those

1370
01:04:37,040 --> 01:04:40,720
Speaker 4: types of questions, so I promised I would stop, and

1371
01:04:40,800 --> 01:04:43,280
Speaker 4: I did, but I still did not trust her one

1372
01:04:43,360 --> 01:04:46,480
Speaker 4: hundred percent. She'd always been good at communicating with me,

1373
01:04:46,880 --> 01:04:48,720
Speaker 4: like telling me when she was going to the gym

1374
01:04:48,840 --> 01:04:51,960
Speaker 4: to work out, or when she was going tanning, or

1375
01:04:52,000 --> 01:04:54,000
Speaker 4: when she was about to leave work and at home.

1376
01:04:54,720 --> 01:04:58,080
Speaker 4: All that stopped and there was no communication. It was

1377
01:04:58,120 --> 01:05:00,640
Speaker 4: hard for me at first, but I I adjusted to

1378
01:05:00,640 --> 01:05:04,000
Speaker 4: the new changes. I stopped worrying about things and just

1379
01:05:04,080 --> 01:05:06,360
Speaker 4: went back to my old self where I really did

1380
01:05:06,360 --> 01:05:08,360
Speaker 4: not care what would happen in our relationship.

1381
01:05:08,880 --> 01:05:10,200
Speaker 7: That's what are we doing? Op?

1382
01:05:10,480 --> 01:05:11,320
Speaker 1: Why are we? Yeah?

1383
01:05:12,760 --> 01:05:15,080
Speaker 4: He's like I went God, I went back to the

1384
01:05:15,560 --> 01:05:18,520
Speaker 4: old place where I just didn't care about our our

1385
01:05:18,640 --> 01:05:20,840
Speaker 4: love at all, or we didn't have any love and

1386
01:05:20,840 --> 01:05:21,400
Speaker 4: it was fine.

1387
01:05:22,120 --> 01:05:24,160
Speaker 1: And then I'm just like, I am shocked that she

1388
01:05:24,280 --> 01:05:30,280
Speaker 1: has sought outside sources of affection and companionship. It's like,

1389
01:05:30,400 --> 01:05:32,400
Speaker 1: you can't even hang out with her and her friends

1390
01:05:32,760 --> 01:05:35,280
Speaker 1: like I might. Yeah, you guys just don't like each other.

1391
01:05:35,880 --> 01:05:38,919
Speaker 4: I add faith in God. If this relationship was going

1392
01:05:38,960 --> 01:05:40,400
Speaker 4: to work, then it will.

1393
01:05:40,960 --> 01:05:41,680
Speaker 5: Dang.

1394
01:05:41,800 --> 01:05:45,920
Speaker 1: That is the most annoying cop out of all time.

1395
01:05:46,040 --> 01:05:48,280
Speaker 4: And if not, then God had other plans for me.

1396
01:05:48,680 --> 01:05:51,640
Speaker 4: Then in July, she and this other coworker who actually

1397
01:05:51,680 --> 01:05:55,160
Speaker 4: worked in the same building and same floor, started talking.

1398
01:05:55,800 --> 01:05:58,400
Speaker 4: She told me about him, how he was a manager

1399
01:05:58,480 --> 01:06:00,520
Speaker 4: and he was in the department where she wanted to

1400
01:06:00,520 --> 01:06:03,560
Speaker 4: make her next career move. She also told me that

1401
01:06:03,640 --> 01:06:05,960
Speaker 4: he was the only manager that would talk to everyone

1402
01:06:06,040 --> 01:06:09,400
Speaker 4: and respected everyone, that he didn't have a big ego

1403
01:06:09,480 --> 01:06:11,080
Speaker 4: because he was an upper manager.

1404
01:06:11,640 --> 01:06:14,480
Speaker 1: What are you doing? What are you doing? I just

1405
01:06:14,520 --> 01:06:17,320
Speaker 1: don't like either side of this, you know. Yeah, it's

1406
01:06:17,440 --> 01:06:20,680
Speaker 1: like instead of it just like immediately looking for Like,

1407
01:06:21,720 --> 01:06:23,440
Speaker 1: I mean, she should have come to you and been

1408
01:06:23,480 --> 01:06:25,560
Speaker 1: like I'm just like not okay, and we need to

1409
01:06:25,560 --> 01:06:28,440
Speaker 1: figure out how to make this work. And you needed

1410
01:06:28,440 --> 01:06:30,440
Speaker 1: to like you need to snap out of it and

1411
01:06:30,520 --> 01:06:34,240
Speaker 1: wake up and realize that God's not gonna swoop down

1412
01:06:34,280 --> 01:06:38,320
Speaker 1: and save your marriage for you. Nope, Like that's ridiculous.

1413
01:06:38,840 --> 01:06:42,720
Speaker 4: Yeah, I mean you've been sent all of these signs

1414
01:06:43,320 --> 01:06:46,840
Speaker 4: of how bad your relationship is and you're just like, well, yeah,

1415
01:06:46,880 --> 01:06:48,200
Speaker 4: maybe Salo get a signed someday.

1416
01:06:48,320 --> 01:06:49,880
Speaker 1: She's like, it reminds me of that scene from Bruce

1417
01:06:49,880 --> 01:06:53,240
Speaker 1: Almighty where he's like, God, just please give me a sign,

1418
01:06:53,520 --> 01:06:57,040
Speaker 1: and then a truck that just has a bajillion stop

1419
01:06:57,200 --> 01:06:59,320
Speaker 1: signs on the back of it at him pulls in

1420
01:06:59,320 --> 01:07:01,640
Speaker 1: front of him and he just goes, oh, come on,

1421
01:07:01,800 --> 01:07:06,200
Speaker 1: I mean like speeds around it. It's like, dude, pay attention, dude,

1422
01:07:06,400 --> 01:07:07,000
Speaker 1: what do you want?

1423
01:07:07,520 --> 01:07:11,400
Speaker 4: But Op says so. On July eighteenth, while she was

1424
01:07:11,440 --> 01:07:14,240
Speaker 4: at work and warming up her lunch, she bumped into

1425
01:07:14,240 --> 01:07:17,160
Speaker 4: the new guy, the manager. They somehow had a conversation

1426
01:07:17,240 --> 01:07:19,720
Speaker 4: about a pizza restaurant and that maybe they should go

1427
01:07:19,760 --> 01:07:22,680
Speaker 4: out to lunch there someday. So they made plans to

1428
01:07:22,680 --> 01:07:26,200
Speaker 4: go to the pizza restaurant the following week, July twenty sixth,

1429
01:07:26,600 --> 01:07:29,320
Speaker 4: but things did not work out because my girlfriend's sister

1430
01:07:29,440 --> 01:07:31,800
Speaker 4: came to visit, so she took time off and I

1431
01:07:31,800 --> 01:07:34,680
Speaker 4: had to cancel her lunch with the manager. Then the

1432
01:07:34,760 --> 01:07:37,240
Speaker 4: following week, after she was back in the office, she

1433
01:07:37,280 --> 01:07:39,040
Speaker 4: and the manager set up a new date and it

1434
01:07:39,040 --> 01:07:43,040
Speaker 4: would be August sixth. She never communicated with me about

1435
01:07:43,080 --> 01:07:46,160
Speaker 4: going out to lunch with this manager, but she did

1436
01:07:46,200 --> 01:07:47,960
Speaker 4: tell me about how she and a few of her

1437
01:07:48,000 --> 01:07:50,720
Speaker 4: friends were going to meet up for dinner on August second.

1438
01:07:51,600 --> 01:07:54,440
Speaker 4: So on August sixth, she calls me to let me

1439
01:07:54,520 --> 01:07:57,360
Speaker 4: know if it would be okay if she went out

1440
01:07:57,360 --> 01:07:59,720
Speaker 4: to lunch during work with a few friends, because there

1441
01:07:59,720 --> 01:08:03,160
Speaker 4: were two interns finishing their internship, so they were going

1442
01:08:03,200 --> 01:08:08,440
Speaker 4: to celebrate. Now, you know what happens next, so what not?

1443
01:08:08,560 --> 01:08:08,880
Speaker 7: Really?

1444
01:08:09,120 --> 01:08:12,720
Speaker 4: I hope that what happens next is a breakup or divorce.

1445
01:08:13,120 --> 01:08:14,760
Speaker 4: Now it's breakup, Yeah, breakup?

1446
01:08:15,360 --> 01:08:15,800
Speaker 7: I don't know.

1447
01:08:16,040 --> 01:08:17,680
Speaker 4: Yeah, this is a bad relationship.

1448
01:08:17,760 --> 01:08:20,839
Speaker 1: Ope, that was a yeah,