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Speaker 1: Hi, this is Joel and Victoria.

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Speaker 2: Thanks for listening to our podcast and thanks for supporting

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Speaker 2: the ministry. If you enjoy today's message, why don't you

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Speaker 2: be a blessing and share it with a friend, reappreciate

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Speaker 2: you and pray for God's very best in your life.

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Speaker 2: Will God bless you? Said joy to come into your homes.

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Speaker 2: If you're ever in our area, please stop buying.

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Speaker 1: Be a part of one of our services. I promise

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Speaker 1: you we'll make you feel right at home. But thanks

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Speaker 1: so much for.

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Speaker 2: Tuning in, and thank you again for coming out today.

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Speaker 2: I like to start with something funny, and I heard

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Speaker 2: about this young lady. She took her fiance home to

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Speaker 2: meet her parents. The dad said, son, tell me about yourself.

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Speaker 1: What do you do? He said, I'm a Bible scholar.

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Speaker 2: Dad said that's great, but how are you going to

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Speaker 2: provide a living for my daughter? He said, I'm going

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Speaker 2: to study the Bible and I know God will provide.

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Speaker 2: He said, yeah, but how are you going to afford

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Speaker 2: an engagement ring for her? He said, I'm going to

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Speaker 2: focus on my studies and I know God will provide.

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Speaker 2: He said, what a few years may have children? How

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Speaker 2: are you going to provide for those children.

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Speaker 1: He said, sir, don't worry. God will provide.

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Speaker 2: Later that night, the man's wife ask him how to

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Speaker 2: talk with their future son in law. Went He said,

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Speaker 2: not good. He has no plans, no job, and he

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Speaker 2: thinks that I'm God. Hold up your bibles. Say it

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Speaker 2: like you mean it. This is my Bible. I am

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Speaker 2: what it says I am. I have what it says

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Speaker 2: I have. I can do what it says I can do.

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Speaker 2: Today I will be taught the word of God. I

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Speaker 2: boldly confess. My mind is alert, my heart is receptive.

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Speaker 2: I will never be the same. In Jesus' name, God

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Speaker 2: bless you. I want to talk to you today about

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Speaker 2: accepting people for who they are.

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Speaker 1: When we get into.

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Speaker 2: Relationship with someone, it's easy to try to make them

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Speaker 2: into who we want them to be, especially our spouse,

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Speaker 2: our children, the people that are close to us. Well.

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Speaker 2: One of the best things I've learned is God. God

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Speaker 2: didn't bring people into my life to make them just

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Speaker 2: like me. God made us different on purpose, different personalities,

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Speaker 2: different strengths, different looks. We're all at different maturity levels.

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Speaker 2: The mistake we make too often is we try to

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Speaker 2: fit people into our mold. It's like we've got them

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Speaker 2: on our potter's wheel and we're trying to work out

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Speaker 2: the lumps, get rid of what we don't like, and

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Speaker 2: get them all fixed up. The problem with this is

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Speaker 2: we are not the potter.

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Speaker 1: God is. God is the one that's making and molding people. Really,

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Speaker 1: we can't change anyone.

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Speaker 2: We can encourage them, we can pray for them, we

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Speaker 2: can lead by example, but only God can truly change people.

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Speaker 2: When someone doesn't have our same strengths and we're working

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Speaker 2: over time trying to make them just like us, all

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Speaker 2: that does is frustrates us, bring stress and tension into

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Speaker 2: the relationship. You've got to give people room to be

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Speaker 2: who God made them to be. If God wanted us

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Speaker 2: to all look alike, think alike, have the same strengths,

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Speaker 2: the same personalities, he would have made us that way.

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Speaker 1: Think about this.

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Speaker 2: The same God that made the butterfly made the locust.

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Speaker 2: The same God that made the poodle made the bulldog,

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Speaker 2: same God that made the horse made the mule, and

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Speaker 2: the same God that made me made my brother Paul.

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Speaker 1: God likes variety. I'm not looking at him.

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Speaker 2: You may be trying to change someone that doesn't have

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Speaker 2: your strengths, your kind of personality, your goals. Yet God

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Speaker 2: made them like that on purpose. You're fighting against.

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Speaker 1: Who they really are.

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Speaker 2: This is what I used to do with Victoria when

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Speaker 2: we first got married. I tried to make her just

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Speaker 2: like me. I thought, what greater gift could I possibly.

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Speaker 1: Give her than that. I'm very naive.

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Speaker 2: Ye. My personality type is I'm very focused, very structured.

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Speaker 2: I've got a plan and I'm gonna stick with it.

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Speaker 2: Victoria is not like that. She's spontaneous, fun, outgoing, not

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Speaker 2: rigid at all. She's incredibly smart, a hard worker, but

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Speaker 2: she's not routine. She doesn't like to do the same

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Speaker 2: thing over and over. Not me. I get up at

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Speaker 2: the same time every morning, not two minutes, variants, the

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Speaker 2: exact same time.

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Speaker 1: I eat the same things for breakfast, been doing it

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Speaker 1: for twenty years.

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Speaker 2: Go to my office at the exact same time. I'm boring,

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Speaker 2: but I am focused. That's one of my strengths. I

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Speaker 2: used to think that it was my calling in life

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Speaker 2: to try to make Victoria like me, and I had

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Speaker 2: her on my potter's will. I thought I was supposed

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Speaker 2: to make my strengths her strengths. One day it dawned

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Speaker 2: on me. I had a revelation. She doesn't want to

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Speaker 2: be like me. That's not who she is. She likes

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Speaker 2: being who God made her to be, just like I

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Speaker 2: like being who God made me to be. We're not

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Speaker 2: supposed to go around looking down on people that don't.

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Speaker 1: Have our same strengths.

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Speaker 2: You'll enjoy your life a whole lot more if you

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Speaker 2: let people off the hook and accept them for who

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Speaker 2: they are. Because when we're always trying to change someone,

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Speaker 2: there's this underlying tension. It says there's something wrong with you.

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Speaker 2: You're not like me, you're inferior. We may not say

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Speaker 2: it out loud, but with our actions it comes out

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Speaker 2: subtly and how we treat people. But a mark of

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Speaker 2: true maturity is you accept people just the way they are.

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Speaker 2: You don't have this hidden agenda. We're deep down you're

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Speaker 2: really trying to change them and make them more like you.

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Speaker 2: The way God made us is we are drawn to

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Speaker 2: people that have strengths that are different than our own.

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Speaker 2: One reason I fell in love with Victoria not just

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Speaker 2: because she's beautiful, smart and talented, but she's fun, outgoing, spontaneous,

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Speaker 2: She's not stiff, not rigid.

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Speaker 1: She has strengths that are different than mine.

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Speaker 2: Yet we get into relationship with someone and we think, Wow,

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Speaker 2: I love your good qualities, but I want you to

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Speaker 2: have my strengths as well. The truth is no person

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Speaker 2: has it all. That's why the scripture talks about we

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Speaker 2: have to make allowances for people's weaknesses. What would happen

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Speaker 2: if we all would start accepting the people God put

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Speaker 2: in our life and not try to change them. Number one,

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Speaker 2: we'd have better relationships, and number two, we wouldn't live

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Speaker 2: frustrated trying to make them into something that they're not.

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Speaker 2: We have this plant at home. It's kind of like

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Speaker 2: an ivy. It's in this large pot and it drapes

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Speaker 2: over toward the ground. When we first got married at

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Speaker 2: our townhouse, we had this same type of plant on

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Speaker 2: our back porch and I took care of it.

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Speaker 1: It was my project.

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Speaker 2: Made sure it had the right amount of sunlight, the

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Speaker 2: right amount of water. It had these thick, dark green leaves,

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Speaker 2: very lush, very full, as healthy as can be. If

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Speaker 2: those leaves ever started turning to a lighter green, I

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Speaker 2: knew it wasn't getting enough water. I would water it

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Speaker 2: more and in no time they would be back to

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Speaker 2: dark green. Well in our backyard now we have this

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Speaker 2: same type of plant, but I could never get the

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Speaker 2: leaves to look right. They were always a little bit

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Speaker 2: lighter green, almost on the verge of being yellow. So

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Speaker 2: I watered them like I did my last plant, again

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Speaker 2: and again, but didn't do any good. Still light green leaves.

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Speaker 2: Kind of puzzled by it, and I thought, maybe something

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Speaker 2: is wrong with the soil. So I went down to

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Speaker 2: the nursery and picked up some fertilizer and I gave

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Speaker 2: that plant food. Day after day. I pampered this plant.

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Speaker 2: I prayed over it, the same to it. I told it,

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Speaker 2: I loved it. I did everything I could nothing help.

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Speaker 2: I thought, why can I get this plant healthy? Why

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Speaker 2: can't I get these leaves dark green? Finally I called

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Speaker 2: the expert out the men from the nursery.

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Speaker 1: He looked at it and said, Joel, this plant.

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Speaker 2: Is as healthy as can be. It's nothing wrong with it.

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Speaker 2: I said, well, why does it have light.

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Speaker 1: Green leaves and not dark green?

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Speaker 2: He said, this plant is a slight variation from the

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Speaker 2: plant you had last time. The vines are the same size,

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Speaker 2: same shape, they grow at the same rate.

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Speaker 1: The only difference is.

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Speaker 2: One has dark green leaves, and one has light green leaves.

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Speaker 1: Here.

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Speaker 2: I had spent months being frustrated trying to make that

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Speaker 2: plant into something that it was never designed to be.

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Speaker 2: Too often we do what I did with people. We

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Speaker 2: think they're supposed to be a certain way. They look

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Speaker 2: the same, they come from the same family. But just

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Speaker 2: like this plant, no matter how hard you try to

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Speaker 2: fit them into that mold, it's not going to happen.

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Speaker 2: It's not who God created them to be. We're not

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Speaker 2: supposed to go around trying to change everybody and try

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Speaker 2: to get them to be like their brother, their cousin,

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Speaker 2: their relative. No.

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Speaker 1: Our job is.

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Speaker 2: To love people, to accept people, to let them be

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Speaker 2: who God created them to be. Don't spend your whole

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Speaker 2: life trying to make someone have dark green leaves when

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Speaker 2: God designed them to have light green leaves. When I

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Speaker 2: was a little boy growing up, I would get into

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Speaker 2: bed every night very carefully, so I wouldn't mess up

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Speaker 2: the covers. I would sleep perfectly still, I wouldn't move.

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Speaker 1: Wouldn't roll over.

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Speaker 2: When I woke up the next day, I would get

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Speaker 2: out of bed as carefully as can be.

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Speaker 1: That way, I.

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Speaker 2: Wouldn't have to make the bed up, it was already made.

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Speaker 2: You're talking about structure. You're all around in your covers.

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Speaker 1: What's wrong with you? It's funny.

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Speaker 2: Our daughter Alexandra, she's thirteen years old, and she's just

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Speaker 2: like me, as perfect as can be. Our son, Jonathan,

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Speaker 2: he's seventeen years old, and he is just like Victoria,

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Speaker 2: perfect in a different way. Alexandra picks out her clothes

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Speaker 2: the night before, what she's going to wear to school

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Speaker 2: the next day, very prepared. We're going on a trip

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Speaker 2: in a couple of weeks. Alexandra's already got those clothes

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Speaker 2: laid out. She knows what she's going to take. Jonathan

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Speaker 2: has a different approach. He will pick his out not

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Speaker 2: two weeks before, but maybe a couple of hours before.

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Speaker 2: Different personalities, different strengths. When Alexandra packs her suitcase, it

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Speaker 2: is a work of art. Everything is strategically placed, perfectly sectioned.

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Speaker 1: All She's got all these little.

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Speaker 2: Bags, bags for makeup, bags for shampoo, bags for soap,

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Speaker 2: bag of snacks that's for the plane ride going. Then,

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Speaker 2: of course there's another bag of snacks strategically placed that's

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Speaker 2: for the plane ride coming back home. When I was

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Speaker 2: Jonathan's age, I was playing sports all the time. Jonathan

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Speaker 2: not only plays sports, but he'll go practice his guitar.

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Speaker 1: For a couple hours. I can't play any instruments.

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Speaker 2: Then he may go right on his screenplay that he's

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Speaker 2: been working on for a year and a half.

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Speaker 1: I would never write.

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Speaker 2: Anything extra unless the teachers required us to do it.

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Speaker 2: God puts people in our life that are different than

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Speaker 2: we are, different strengths, different talents, different goals.

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Speaker 1: Too often we look at.

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Speaker 2: Them and say, hey, you're not like me, Let me

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Speaker 2: fix you, let me get you straightened out.

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Speaker 1: They don't need to be fixed. They don't need to

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Speaker 1: be straightened out.

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Speaker 2: They need to be accepted, approved, loved, encouraged. Just because

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Speaker 2: they're not like you doesn't mean that they're less than.

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Speaker 2: Most likely they have that you don't have. They're good

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Speaker 2: at something that you're not good at. Don't waste your

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Speaker 2: valuable time and energy trying to make somebody just like you.

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Speaker 2: Let them be who God made them to be. I

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Speaker 2: have a fourteen year old niece named Caroline. This is

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Speaker 2: my sister Lisa's daughter and her husband Kevin, and Caroline

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Speaker 2: is not only.

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Speaker 1: Beautiful, but she's extremely creative.

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Speaker 2: She loves fashion, she's got a great eye for design.

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Speaker 2: She can take the most unusual clothes and jewelry and

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Speaker 2: put them together and make them really look great. Nobody

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Speaker 2: taught her to do this. It just comes naturally to her.

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Speaker 2: But here's the thing. Caroline doesn't like traditional. She likes

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Speaker 2: anything out of the ordinary. She likes her hair any

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Speaker 2: color but her normal color, not brown, but red or blonde,

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Speaker 2: or black, or with an oine streak through it. She's

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Speaker 2: got this incredible personality, so stylish, so fashionable. When God

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Speaker 2: puts people in our lives like that that are different,

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Speaker 2: it's easy to think, well, they're far out, they're strange.

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Speaker 2: Let me get them into my mold. Now, that's like

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Speaker 2: trying to make that dark green plant have light green leaves.

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Speaker 1: It's not who they are.

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Speaker 2: God is the one that puts the talents, the creativities,

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Speaker 2: the strengths in the different people. Our job is not

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Speaker 2: to try to change them and make them like us.

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Speaker 2: We should encourage them, give them advice, give them wisdom.

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Speaker 2: But take people off of your potter's will.

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Speaker 1: Don't try to make them just like you. Accept them

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Speaker 1: for who God made them to be.

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Speaker 2: You see me up here, and you know it may

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Speaker 2: seem like I'm really out going.

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Speaker 1: I'm very talkative, but.

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Speaker 2: The truth is, when I'm not up here, I'm very

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Speaker 2: quiet and reserved.

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Speaker 1: I'm not super talkative.

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Speaker 2: Of course, Victoria and I we talk at home and

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Speaker 2: we have fun together. There's a lot of laughter in

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Speaker 2: our home. But as much as Victoria would probably like

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Speaker 2: me to sit down and talk with her two or

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Speaker 2: three hours every evening, that's just not who I am

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Speaker 2: and I've grown. I do my best to communicate properly,

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Speaker 2: but Victoria recognizes that's not one of my strengths.

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Speaker 1: She doesn't try to make me into something that I'm not.

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Speaker 2: She accepts the fact that I'm just not one that's

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Speaker 2: probably going to sit down and tell my innermost deepest feelings.

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Speaker 2: One reason we have a good relationship is because we're

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Speaker 2: not constantly trying to change each other. We accept each

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Speaker 2: other for who we are. If you're always working on

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Speaker 2: another person, trying to change them, there's going to be

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Speaker 2: this underlying resentment that will develop. It says, why doesn't

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Speaker 2: he talk to me more? Why does she act that way?

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Speaker 2: It's much better to say that's just who God made

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Speaker 2: them to be.

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Speaker 1: I can't change them.

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Speaker 2: Only God can, and if he does great, But in

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Speaker 2: the meantime, I'm not gonna be frustrated. Here's my whole

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Speaker 2: message in a nutshell. The other person may not change,

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Speaker 2: but you can change. You don't have to allow what

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Speaker 2: they do or don't do upset you. For the next

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Speaker 2: twenty five years, Victoria has had to make allowances for

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Speaker 2: my weaknesses. I've had to make allowances for her weaknesses.

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Speaker 2: When I come to church, I like to arrive at

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Speaker 2: least thirty minutes early so I can go over my

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Speaker 2: notes and prepare and really be in peace. Victoria, on

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Speaker 2: the other hand, she likes to come just a few

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Speaker 2: minutes before the service starts. She prepares at home and

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Speaker 2: goes over her notes there. For years, I tried to

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Speaker 2: change her. I'd say, Victoria, why don't you leave a

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Speaker 2: little bit earlier, case you get caught in traffic, case you.

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Speaker 1: Get delayed for some reason.

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Speaker 2: We've been doing this for twelve years, and she's never

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Speaker 2: once missed the opening of the service. I was just

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Speaker 2: trying to fit her into my mold. When we moved

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Speaker 2: from the other localeation to this new building, said of

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Speaker 2: being a thirty minute drive, it's only a ten minute drive.

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Speaker 2: I thought, great, that's gonna solve everything. She gonna be

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Speaker 2: here twenty minutes early. But that's not how she saw it.

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Speaker 2: She already calculated that's twenty minutes for her to get

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Speaker 2: something else done.

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Speaker 1: Here's my point.

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Speaker 2: She didn't change, but I changed after twenty five years

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Speaker 2: of marriage.

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Speaker 1: Twenty five years.

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Speaker 2: Are trying to make her just like me. I had

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Speaker 2: a breakthrough a revelation. God made her like that on purpose.

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Speaker 2: I've learned to accept her and approve her just the

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Speaker 2: way she is. Are there people? Are there people in

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Speaker 2: your life. You're waiting for them to change, and then

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Speaker 2: you're gonna be happy. Then you're gonna let them off

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Speaker 2: the hook. As soon as they fit into your mold,

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Speaker 2: then you're going to give them your approval. Now take

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Speaker 2: this in the right way. They may never change, It

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Speaker 2: may not be who God created them to be.

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Speaker 1: Good news is you can change.

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Speaker 2: Doesn't have to bother you, doesn't have to lessen the relationship.

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Speaker 2: Don't focus on what you don't like about that person.

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Speaker 2: Focus on their good qualities. I've heard it said men,

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Speaker 2: when you're tempted to complain about your wife's faults, remember

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Speaker 2: it was those faults that kept her from getting a

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Speaker 2: better husband. Focus on the good qualities. Remember the reasons

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Speaker 2: that you fell in love. Proverbs eighteen twenty two says

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Speaker 2: he who finds a wife finds a good thing and

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Speaker 2: finds favor from the lord.

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Speaker 1: Husbands.

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Speaker 2: You got to remind yourself your wife is bringing you favor.

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Speaker 1: Victoria doesn't let me forget it.

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Speaker 2: She'll go through the house saying, Joel, when you got me,

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Speaker 2: you got favor. I say, yeah, and I got a

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Speaker 2: lot of other things too.

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Speaker 1: But here's the key. Give people room to not be perfect.

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Speaker 2: Your wife may not be the greatest cook in the world,

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Speaker 2: but she's a fan fantastic mother. You and your children

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Speaker 2: are blessed to have that woman in your life. See

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Speaker 2: the good. Your husband may not be the greatest communicator,

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Speaker 2: but he's a hard worker. You never have to worry

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Speaker 2: about the bills being paid. Focus on those good qualities.

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Speaker 2: The scripture says a wife is to enjoy her husband.

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Speaker 2: Notice it doesn't say you are to remodel your husband.

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Speaker 2: Take that man off your potter's whill. Sometimes we are

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Speaker 2: not enjoying the people God's put in our life because

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Speaker 2: we're too busy trying to change them. Well, Joel, my

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Speaker 2: husband doesn't bring me flowers like Susie's husband. Every week

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Speaker 2: they have a candlelight dinner every Friday night. He writes

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Speaker 2: her this beautiful romantic poetry. No quit comparing your spouse

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Speaker 2: to Romeo over there, and just accept the person God's

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Speaker 2: given you. That other men may be Romeo, but I

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Speaker 2: can assure you he has some weaknesses, something that lady

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00:19:01,119 --> 00:19:04,840
Speaker 2: has to overlook. I'll admit I'm not the most romantic person,

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Speaker 2: but I remind Victoria all the time.

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Speaker 1: I may not be Romeo, but at least i'm jo Leo.

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Speaker 1: That's really corny. I didn't come up with that. Somebody

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Speaker 1: gave it to me the other.

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Speaker 2: Instead of complaining about what you don't like about a person,

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Speaker 2: well you never bring me flowers? Will you never talk

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Speaker 2: to me? Were you always too busy? You're never available.

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Speaker 2: Try a different approach. Start telling that person what you

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Speaker 2: do like about them. I really appreciate you being such

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Speaker 2: a great mother. You are so good with our children.

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Speaker 2: I really appreciate you being such a hard worker. You're

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Speaker 2: somebody I can always count on. Listen, people respond to

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00:19:46,840 --> 00:19:50,560
Speaker 2: praise a lot better than they do criticism. Instead of

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Speaker 2: nagging that husband, you're so lazy, you never mow the lawn.

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Speaker 1: Why don't you get up off this couch? Now?

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Speaker 2: Just say, have I ever told you? When I see

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00:19:59,480 --> 00:20:04,680
Speaker 2: you out there mowing the lawn those muscles bulge in.

364
00:20:06,240 --> 00:20:10,119
Speaker 2: That's sweat dripping down your face, the wind blowing through you.

365
00:20:10,240 --> 00:20:15,920
Speaker 2: Two pay how incredibly handsome you are. You praise him

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Speaker 2: like that, and he'll mow the lawn every day. It's

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Speaker 2: amazing what people will do when you see the best

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Speaker 2: in them, when you honor them, when you respect them,

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00:20:28,280 --> 00:20:31,600
Speaker 2: it not only strengthens the relationship, but it'll help that

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00:20:31,680 --> 00:20:35,800
Speaker 2: other person rise higher. It's like a cork that's inside

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Speaker 2: a large bottle. As long as there's no water in

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Speaker 2: the bottle, the cork will be at the bottom. When

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00:20:42,080 --> 00:20:45,439
Speaker 2: you pour water in, the cork will always rise to

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Speaker 2: the top of the water. Well, the person you're in

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Speaker 2: relationship with is like the cork. They may be on

376
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Speaker 2: the bottom right now, but as you give encouragement, show honor,

377
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Speaker 2: show respect, you're pouring water into that bottle.

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Speaker 1: They won't stay where they are.

379
00:21:01,119 --> 00:21:04,080
Speaker 2: They'll continue to rise to the level that you pour

380
00:21:04,160 --> 00:21:07,400
Speaker 2: into them. You want to make your spouse, your children,

381
00:21:07,480 --> 00:21:08,959
Speaker 2: your loved one a better person.

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Speaker 1: Honor them in a greater way.

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Speaker 2: Accept them for who they are, give them your approval,

384
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Speaker 2: even if they don't fit into your mold. You have

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00:21:19,119 --> 00:21:23,840
Speaker 2: tremendous power and influence into their lives. You can push

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Speaker 2: them further with your honor, your acceptance, your approval, or

387
00:21:28,640 --> 00:21:32,080
Speaker 2: you can withhold it and keep them back. I know

388
00:21:32,160 --> 00:21:35,399
Speaker 2: this young couple that were newly married. The husband was

389
00:21:35,440 --> 00:21:39,000
Speaker 2: a graphic designer, very talented, very creative.

390
00:21:39,440 --> 00:21:41,280
Speaker 1: His wife was so proud of him.

391
00:21:41,640 --> 00:21:45,320
Speaker 2: She was always bragging on him, saying, you are so gifted,

392
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Speaker 2: You're going to do great things.

393
00:21:47,320 --> 00:21:50,560
Speaker 1: In the first few years of the marriage, this husband

394
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Speaker 1: got several major promotions. His career just took off.

395
00:21:54,720 --> 00:21:57,639
Speaker 2: It excelled, and his wife was so happy and she

396
00:21:57,800 --> 00:22:01,359
Speaker 2: continued to encourage him. But four or five year span,

397
00:22:01,920 --> 00:22:05,600
Speaker 2: things had slowed down. Didn't get any promotions. He was

398
00:22:05,640 --> 00:22:08,240
Speaker 2: at the same level, doing the same type of work.

399
00:22:08,560 --> 00:22:12,679
Speaker 2: He was still very successful, still proud of himself. The

400
00:22:12,800 --> 00:22:17,480
Speaker 2: problem is he had not met his wife's expectations. She

401
00:22:17,680 --> 00:22:21,040
Speaker 2: thought he should be further and that he wasn't nearly

402
00:22:21,119 --> 00:22:22,200
Speaker 2: as aggressive enough.

403
00:22:22,920 --> 00:22:24,280
Speaker 1: She didn't say anything.

404
00:22:23,960 --> 00:22:27,520
Speaker 2: Out loud, but by her actions you could tell she

405
00:22:27,720 --> 00:22:28,520
Speaker 2: was disappointed.

406
00:22:29,080 --> 00:22:30,720
Speaker 1: She quit pouring in the honor.

407
00:22:31,160 --> 00:22:35,040
Speaker 2: She quit encouraging, She didn't brag on him anymore. Why

408
00:22:35,800 --> 00:22:39,080
Speaker 2: he wasn't fitting in to her mold, He wasn't meeting

409
00:22:39,200 --> 00:22:42,080
Speaker 2: her standards. And it had always had a great marriage,

410
00:22:42,280 --> 00:22:45,639
Speaker 2: as happy as can be, But now the seeds of

411
00:22:45,720 --> 00:22:49,760
Speaker 2: discontent started to take root. Long story short, a few

412
00:22:49,840 --> 00:22:52,880
Speaker 2: years later they split up and went their separate ways.

413
00:22:53,560 --> 00:22:56,800
Speaker 2: That's what can happen when we try to make people

414
00:22:57,000 --> 00:23:00,399
Speaker 2: fit into our mold. We quit pouring the honor in,

415
00:23:01,000 --> 00:23:04,520
Speaker 2: we quit respecting. We may not say it out loud,

416
00:23:04,880 --> 00:23:07,960
Speaker 2: but by our actions, they can feel that we're disappointed,

417
00:23:08,160 --> 00:23:10,880
Speaker 2: that we're not proud of them. We're focused on their

418
00:23:10,960 --> 00:23:14,400
Speaker 2: faults and all the qualities that we don't like about them.

419
00:23:15,000 --> 00:23:16,840
Speaker 1: No, take people off.

420
00:23:16,720 --> 00:23:21,199
Speaker 2: Of your potter's will, your spouse, your children, the people

421
00:23:21,240 --> 00:23:24,320
Speaker 2: you love. They may not have meant your goals, they

422
00:23:24,359 --> 00:23:26,640
Speaker 2: may not be as aggressive as you would like them

423
00:23:26,680 --> 00:23:30,359
Speaker 2: to be, but you have to accept them for who

424
00:23:30,400 --> 00:23:33,760
Speaker 2: they are today. They may not be where you want

425
00:23:33,800 --> 00:23:36,880
Speaker 2: them to be, but God is the one that's directing

426
00:23:36,920 --> 00:23:39,919
Speaker 2: their steps. God is the one that's making them and

427
00:23:40,000 --> 00:23:44,200
Speaker 2: mold them. Love them for who they are right now.

428
00:23:44,760 --> 00:23:48,440
Speaker 2: Don't have the attitude. I'll love you as long as

429
00:23:48,440 --> 00:23:52,240
Speaker 2: you succeed on my timetable, as long as you meet

430
00:23:52,280 --> 00:23:55,000
Speaker 2: my standards, as long as you change the way I

431
00:23:55,040 --> 00:23:56,000
Speaker 2: want you to change.

432
00:23:56,600 --> 00:24:00,000
Speaker 1: Now, give people room to be who God created them

433
00:24:00,240 --> 00:24:00,439
Speaker 1: to be.

434
00:24:01,119 --> 00:24:04,560
Speaker 2: God's plan for their life may not be the same

435
00:24:04,680 --> 00:24:08,880
Speaker 2: plan that you have for their life. His timetable may

436
00:24:08,960 --> 00:24:13,240
Speaker 2: be different than your timetable. I can assure you God

437
00:24:13,320 --> 00:24:17,199
Speaker 2: knows what he's doing. His plan will be bigger, better,

438
00:24:17,600 --> 00:24:23,200
Speaker 2: more rewarding, more fulfilling. Now, don't withhold your blessing, keep

439
00:24:23,240 --> 00:24:27,960
Speaker 2: pouring in the honor, keep encouraging, keep respecting, and God

440
00:24:28,000 --> 00:24:28,920
Speaker 2: will get them.

441
00:24:28,800 --> 00:24:29,960
Speaker 1: To where he wants them to be.

442
00:24:30,840 --> 00:24:34,399
Speaker 2: But too many people like this woman, They end a

443
00:24:34,480 --> 00:24:38,600
Speaker 2: relationship because there's one main thing they don't like about

444
00:24:38,600 --> 00:24:44,040
Speaker 2: the person. They focus on what annoys them and magnify

445
00:24:44,200 --> 00:24:46,800
Speaker 2: how they've got too much of this or not enough

446
00:24:46,800 --> 00:24:50,639
Speaker 2: of that. They'll go find somebody else that has a

447
00:24:50,720 --> 00:24:54,880
Speaker 2: strength where that other person has a weakness. The problem

448
00:24:55,000 --> 00:24:58,159
Speaker 2: is this new person will have a weakness where the

449
00:24:58,200 --> 00:25:01,240
Speaker 2: other person had a strength just moving things around.

450
00:25:01,600 --> 00:25:03,240
Speaker 1: It's always going to come down to.

451
00:25:03,640 --> 00:25:08,479
Speaker 2: Overlooking the weaknesses, seeing the best in them, accepting people

452
00:25:08,640 --> 00:25:12,160
Speaker 2: for who they are. I've heard it said someone will

453
00:25:12,240 --> 00:25:15,640
Speaker 2: leave a person that has eighty percent of what they

454
00:25:15,720 --> 00:25:17,640
Speaker 2: need because they find.

455
00:25:17,440 --> 00:25:19,880
Speaker 1: The other twenty percent in somebody else.

456
00:25:20,760 --> 00:25:25,160
Speaker 2: What they don't realize is no person has one hundred percent.

457
00:25:25,960 --> 00:25:29,080
Speaker 2: If you leave the eighty because you find the twenty

458
00:25:29,200 --> 00:25:33,400
Speaker 2: in someone else, well, sooner than later you will realize

459
00:25:33,600 --> 00:25:36,320
Speaker 2: that there's twenty percent that that new person doesn't have

460
00:25:36,400 --> 00:25:41,560
Speaker 2: as well. It's much better to recognize no one person.

461
00:25:41,320 --> 00:25:43,120
Speaker 1: Can give you everything that you need.

462
00:25:43,680 --> 00:25:46,720
Speaker 2: You've got to focus on their good qualities and don't

463
00:25:46,760 --> 00:25:49,720
Speaker 2: be frustrated by what they don't have or what they

464
00:25:49,720 --> 00:25:52,800
Speaker 2: can't give you. It's like that old saying the grass

465
00:25:52,840 --> 00:25:55,760
Speaker 2: may look greener on the other side, but it still

466
00:25:55,800 --> 00:25:59,320
Speaker 2: has to be mode. That's basically saying there's still twenty

467
00:25:59,320 --> 00:26:02,919
Speaker 2: percent that other person is not going to have some of.

468
00:26:02,960 --> 00:26:05,679
Speaker 2: You would see your relationships go to a new level

469
00:26:06,000 --> 00:26:08,760
Speaker 2: if you would start accepting people for who they are.

470
00:26:09,640 --> 00:26:12,399
Speaker 2: Like that plant, you may be a dark green leaf,

471
00:26:12,640 --> 00:26:15,679
Speaker 2: they're a light green leaf, but you're doing everything you

472
00:26:15,760 --> 00:26:18,600
Speaker 2: can to try to make them just like you. The

473
00:26:18,720 --> 00:26:21,679
Speaker 2: problem is that's not who God designed them to be.

474
00:26:22,480 --> 00:26:23,680
Speaker 2: Why don't you let them off?

475
00:26:23,720 --> 00:26:27,040
Speaker 1: Of your potter's will. Don't try to fix them, don't

476
00:26:27,080 --> 00:26:27,440
Speaker 1: try to.

477
00:26:27,359 --> 00:26:30,439
Speaker 2: Make them fit into your mold. God is the potter.

478
00:26:30,880 --> 00:26:33,840
Speaker 2: He knows what he's doing. Now do your part and

479
00:26:33,960 --> 00:26:38,119
Speaker 2: start pouring the honor in start respecting them in a

480
00:26:38,160 --> 00:26:39,320
Speaker 2: greater way.

481
00:26:39,440 --> 00:26:40,640
Speaker 1: Don't love them.

482
00:26:40,520 --> 00:26:43,880
Speaker 2: If they meet your standards, love them for who they are.

483
00:26:43,960 --> 00:26:47,080
Speaker 1: Right now, if you will start accepting and.

484
00:26:47,000 --> 00:26:49,760
Speaker 2: Approving the people God's put in your life, you'll not

485
00:26:49,800 --> 00:26:53,400
Speaker 2: only help them rise higher and them fulfill their destiny.

486
00:26:53,640 --> 00:26:56,560
Speaker 1: But I believe and declare you will rise higher.

487
00:26:56,680 --> 00:27:00,560
Speaker 2: You will have better relationships, and you will become everything

488
00:27:00,600 --> 00:27:01,760
Speaker 2: God's created.

489
00:27:01,400 --> 00:27:03,639
Speaker 1: You to be. Amen. Do you receive it today?

490
00:27:05,680 --> 00:27:08,399
Speaker 2: We never like to close our broadcast without giving you

491
00:27:08,440 --> 00:27:11,439
Speaker 2: an opportunity to make Jesus the lord of your life.

492
00:27:11,880 --> 00:27:16,199
Speaker 1: Would you pray with me? Just say, Lord, Jesus, I

493
00:27:16,320 --> 00:27:21,240
Speaker 1: repent of my sins. Come into my heart. I make

494
00:27:21,320 --> 00:27:22,560
Speaker 1: you my lord and savior.

495
00:27:23,960 --> 00:27:26,320
Speaker 2: Friends, if you prayed that simple prayer, we believe you

496
00:27:26,400 --> 00:27:29,160
Speaker 2: got born again. Get in a good Bible based church,

497
00:27:29,520 --> 00:27:30,760
Speaker 2: Keep God first place.

498
00:27:31,000 --> 00:27:33,280
Speaker 1: He's going to take you places you've never dreamed of.

499
00:27:34,840 --> 00:27:38,840
Speaker 3: It's a new year. Time to see the impossible become possible.

500
00:27:39,160 --> 00:27:40,040
Speaker 1: It's a new year.

501
00:27:40,440 --> 00:27:44,800
Speaker 3: Life setbacks are about to become God's setups for new opportunity.

502
00:27:45,160 --> 00:27:46,080
Speaker 1: It's a new year.

503
00:27:46,560 --> 00:27:49,720
Speaker 3: Cherished dreams will become unexpected reality.

504
00:27:50,440 --> 00:27:52,680
Speaker 2: The start of the new year is the perfect time

505
00:27:52,760 --> 00:27:56,359
Speaker 2: to reset your focus, release disappointments of the past, and

506
00:27:56,440 --> 00:27:59,000
Speaker 2: get ready for the new things God has in store.

507
00:27:59,520 --> 00:28:02,880
Speaker 2: Every we create a new three hundred and sixty five

508
00:28:03,000 --> 00:28:04,800
Speaker 2: day devotional calendar.

509
00:28:05,160 --> 00:28:06,240
Speaker 1: I'd love to send it to you.

510
00:28:06,680 --> 00:28:11,040
Speaker 2: Each day is filled with inspiration, scripture, and uplifting declarations

511
00:28:11,040 --> 00:28:14,040
Speaker 2: to fuel your faith. When you begin the day thanking

512
00:28:14,080 --> 00:28:17,440
Speaker 2: God for what He's done, speaking victory over your future,

513
00:28:17,920 --> 00:28:22,440
Speaker 2: you're positioning yourself for a blessed, favor filled year. Amazing

514
00:28:22,480 --> 00:28:24,960
Speaker 2: things happen when you keep God first place.

515
00:28:25,720 --> 00:28:28,119
Speaker 3: As our way of saying thank you for your gift

516
00:28:28,160 --> 00:28:30,760
Speaker 3: of any amount this first month of the year, we

517
00:28:30,840 --> 00:28:33,080
Speaker 3: would like to send you a copy of our brand

518
00:28:33,119 --> 00:28:36,280
Speaker 3: new three hundred and sixty five day twenty twenty six

519
00:28:36,400 --> 00:28:40,200
Speaker 3: devotional calendar. Do you want to overcome your most pressing

520
00:28:40,280 --> 00:28:41,960
Speaker 3: challenges in twenty twenty six?

521
00:28:42,320 --> 00:28:43,320
Speaker 1: Do you want to see.

522
00:28:43,120 --> 00:28:47,240
Speaker 3: Your life take off in new directions of influence, favor.

523
00:28:47,080 --> 00:28:48,880
Speaker 1: And provision in the year ahead?

524
00:28:49,360 --> 00:28:53,120
Speaker 3: With this daily encouragement, you'll not only smile at your day,

525
00:28:53,520 --> 00:28:57,280
Speaker 3: you'll be reminded that God is smiling on your entire life.

526
00:28:57,720 --> 00:29:01,560
Speaker 3: Each day will be a fresh new day. Turn discouragement

527
00:29:01,800 --> 00:29:08,720
Speaker 3: to encouragement, frustration to fulfillment, anxiety to overcoming. Start each

528
00:29:08,800 --> 00:29:12,520
Speaker 3: morning knowing that it's God's desire to turn what seems

529
00:29:12,600 --> 00:29:18,000
Speaker 3: like an ordinary life into extraordinary favor, strength, and opportunities.

530
00:29:18,480 --> 00:29:23,720
Speaker 3: Using this devotional calendar is as easy as one, two, three.

531
00:29:24,040 --> 00:29:28,000
Speaker 3: One wake up with an expectancy in your heart. Two

532
00:29:28,480 --> 00:29:31,840
Speaker 3: reflect on the daily scripture, verse and devotional from Joel.

533
00:29:32,360 --> 00:29:36,640
Speaker 3: Three capture the Lord's promises to you on journaling lines

534
00:29:36,680 --> 00:29:37,960
Speaker 3: for writing and reflection.

535
00:29:38,880 --> 00:29:41,000
Speaker 2: Twenty twenty six is going to be one of your

536
00:29:41,120 --> 00:29:43,720
Speaker 2: best years ever. We're going to help you stay in

537
00:29:43,760 --> 00:29:46,360
Speaker 2: faith so you can see the goodness of God in

538
00:29:46,480 --> 00:29:49,120
Speaker 2: new ways. Dictor and I pray for you and your

539
00:29:49,200 --> 00:29:51,600
Speaker 2: family every day, and we want to thank you for

540
00:29:51,720 --> 00:29:56,000
Speaker 2: your prayer and support. Your generosity is impacting lives around

541
00:29:56,040 --> 00:29:58,720
Speaker 2: the world. A special thank you to our Champion of

542
00:29:58,720 --> 00:30:01,880
Speaker 2: Hope Partners for your money, Gibbs. You're not a partner,

543
00:30:01,880 --> 00:30:05,160
Speaker 2: I hope you'll consider becoming one. Remember you can watch

544
00:30:05,200 --> 00:30:10,320
Speaker 2: the services online live every Sunday morning. Download our daily podcast,

545
00:30:10,720 --> 00:30:14,120
Speaker 2: watch on YouTube or the new joel Ostein network twenty

546
00:30:14,120 --> 00:30:16,959
Speaker 2: four hours a day. Of course, listen live on Serious

547
00:30:17,080 --> 00:30:20,200
Speaker 2: XM as well. But until we meet again, made the

548
00:30:20,200 --> 00:30:21,800
Speaker 2: Lord bless you and keep you.

549
00:30:22,800 --> 00:30:25,480
Speaker 3: Be sure to request your copy of the twenty twenty

550
00:30:25,520 --> 00:30:29,880
Speaker 3: sixth devotional calendar available this month by simply visiting us

551
00:30:30,000 --> 00:30:33,720
Speaker 3: at Joelostein dot com or calling eight eight eight five

552
00:30:33,840 --> 00:30:40,840
Speaker 3: six seven Joel. Also, no matter what season you're in, joy, sorrow, waiting, growth,

553
00:30:41,160 --> 00:30:44,960
Speaker 3: God wants to speak into each and every moment. God's

554
00:30:45,000 --> 00:30:48,840
Speaker 3: Word for Every Season is a guided journal series designed

555
00:30:48,840 --> 00:30:52,360
Speaker 3: to help you slow down, write out scripture, and reflect

556
00:30:52,400 --> 00:30:55,440
Speaker 3: on its truth, one verse at a time. As you

557
00:30:55,560 --> 00:30:59,800
Speaker 3: engage with His Word, you'll discover fresh strength, deeper peace,

558
00:31:00,120 --> 00:31:04,040
Speaker 3: and timely encouragement for every step of your journey. You

559
00:31:04,120 --> 00:31:07,920
Speaker 3: can request these inspiring resources by calling eight eight eight

560
00:31:08,120 --> 00:31:12,000
Speaker 3: five six seven Joel or logging on to jolostein dot

561
00:31:12,040 --> 00:31:15,920
Speaker 3: com today call or click anytime twenty four hours a

562
00:31:16,000 --> 00:31:18,560
Speaker 3: day request these resources today