Speaker 1: The Nicky Glizer podcasts.
Speaker 2: Than here's Nicky Glue here.
Speaker 1: I am welcome to the show. It's the Nicky Glazer
Speaker 1: podcast here with uh Noah and Brian. Hello in Saint Louis.
Speaker 2: We're all remote. Happy New Year, good happy news.
Speaker 3: You know, we didn't get to say that because so
Speaker 3: many things happened at the beginning of the year. They
Speaker 3: were vulnerable and good.
Speaker 2: Yeah.
Speaker 3: Yeah, I don't think that Happy New Year to a
Speaker 3: single person. I don't think I said it to you
Speaker 3: on New Year's Eve.
Speaker 1: That's crazy. I don't think we did. Now, how did
Speaker 1: you guys ring in the New Year?
Speaker 3: Like?
Speaker 1: We were out doing sets that night, but then we
Speaker 1: called we were done by like I think ten forty five,
Speaker 1: and then we went home the last that was at
Speaker 1: the Comedy Store, and then Chris and I just went
Speaker 1: home and watched Anderson Cooper and yes, Andy Cohen getting
Speaker 1: drunk in Times Square.
Speaker 3: That's the best way to do it. I think that's
Speaker 3: the best of all those shows.
Speaker 1: And we looked out the window and saw some fireworks
Speaker 1: and I was just like, I thought, hate fireworks. I
Speaker 1: think they should be banned. They're so disruptive to the world.
Speaker 1: Everyone's stressed out by them. They remind you of They
Speaker 1: either sound like gunshots or bombs yea.
Speaker 2: Also fire.
Speaker 1: I mean this was before we were terrified of fire,
Speaker 1: I guess, but should have still been terrified of fire.
Speaker 1: And also they are just bad for animals. They just
Speaker 1: animals know that it's the New year, celebration of the
Speaker 1: New Year, or fourth of July. They're not animals are
Speaker 1: not festive. It's one of the worst things about animals.
Speaker 2: And but the other.
Speaker 1: Worst thing is that they're too stupid to know what's happening.
Speaker 1: And they just are horrified. Whatever your dog does is
Speaker 1: what a squirrel is doing. And they abandon their babies,
Speaker 1: and their babies starved to death, like it's it's terrible.
Speaker 1: You guys just stop at the fireworks.
Speaker 2: Just just can't.
Speaker 1: Can't you just hoot and holler? Why do we need
Speaker 1: fireworks them?
Speaker 3: The replacement for fireworks is thrones. Yeah and yeah, now
Speaker 3: the fireworks are horrible, Like nobody the birds obviously don't
Speaker 3: know that it's July fourth. Most of them are from
Speaker 3: Mexico that are around here anyway, so they're not even patriotic,
Speaker 3: and it's raised them all away and it's horrible.
Speaker 2: We have immigrant birds.
Speaker 3: All of our birds are pretty build.
Speaker 2: That wall higher. They're definitely just flying over the border.
Speaker 1: Yeah, it's just I hate fireworks and it sucks because
Speaker 1: Chris loves them so much and he's so patriotic, and
Speaker 1: it's like a part of it's not even a part
Speaker 1: of like his patriotism, but it is. He loves them,
Speaker 1: and I think it's one thing that will destroy us ultimately.
Speaker 1: It's like it's worse than like if he wanted babies
Speaker 1: or something, and I don't like it's this will divide
Speaker 1: us for forever because it's his favorite holiday, I think,
Speaker 1: And I all I can think about is just animals
Speaker 1: being scared and al's being like.
Speaker 2: Whoo and like turning their heads all the way.
Speaker 1: Around, being like where's that coming from, and then abandoning
Speaker 1: their babies another baby starve.
Speaker 2: It's the worst.
Speaker 3: Chris has always said to me ever since I've known
Speaker 3: him that he just wants to settle down with a
Speaker 3: nice women and light some fireworks together, raise fireworks. I guess.
Speaker 1: I just I've always hated them. Even as a kid,
Speaker 1: I was totally scared of them. I always felt it
Speaker 1: was the I was embarrassed at how scared.
Speaker 2: I was of them.
Speaker 1: I just don't like loud sounds out of nowhere. I
Speaker 1: hate balloons. I don't like when kids are playing with
Speaker 1: balloons because I feel like they're gonna pop at any second.
Speaker 1: I don't like a balloon just like kind of trapesing
Speaker 1: across the ground, like I just feel like it's gonna
Speaker 1: hit something. It's gonna pop, and then I'm gonna be scared.
Speaker 2: I just don't like this scare. It's a jump stack.
Speaker 2: I don't scare happen.
Speaker 1: I don't like jump scares. Yeah, I hate balloons. I
Speaker 1: love helium. I think that's a really fun part of balloons. Yeah,
Speaker 1: I just don't like any I don't like loud noises.
Speaker 1: I had pilates today and I really like this girl
Speaker 1: who's the instructor, but she it was very loud and
Speaker 1: I was plugging my ears as I was like doing
Speaker 1: a uh lunge on this like equipment, and I was
Speaker 1: I was hoping that might like catch on, like it's
Speaker 1: too loud, But then I was like, no, I don't
Speaker 1: need to be passive aggressive, and I just got off
Speaker 1: the thing and I ran and got some tissue paper
Speaker 1: and I just stuck that in my ear, So I've
Speaker 1: never kind of passive aggressiveness that is, like solving my
Speaker 1: problem and not making it her problem.
Speaker 3: She still might have seen that and taken it as
Speaker 3: a passive aggressive.
Speaker 2: That's what I'm saying.
Speaker 1: It was like, but at least I was doing a
Speaker 1: thing for myself that was like sustainable and not plugging
Speaker 1: my ears. And then after the class, she was passing
Speaker 1: out the things to wipe down your thing, and she
Speaker 1: very discreetly was like, you were amazing on the Golden globes.
Speaker 2: You blew my mind so nice.
Speaker 1: And I was like, you can scream all you want
Speaker 1: for the rest of your life.
Speaker 2: You can get away with anything now, because.
Speaker 3: She was passing things to wipe down the machines, and
Speaker 3: You're like, I don't need any I have it in
Speaker 3: my ears, and then.
Speaker 2: I can just use this.
Speaker 1: They sometimes they give me double because I sweat so much,
Speaker 1: but I, yeah, I'm back at it.
Speaker 2: That feels really good.
Speaker 3: Can I go back to the fireworks just for a second,
Speaker 3: because there's.
Speaker 2: This go back forever?
Speaker 3: Fireworks are also dangerous for the people lighting the fireworks.
Speaker 3: There's this famous incident from a football player a New
Speaker 3: York Giant Jason Pierre Paul, who's going to be a
Speaker 3: Hall of Famer. He keeps playing JPP, they called, and
Speaker 3: he's an incredible defensive lineman with a ton of sacks.
Speaker 3: But one year when he was on the Giants over
Speaker 3: the summer, he blew off two of his fingers. He
Speaker 3: still plays, Yeah, he played for like ten years after.
Speaker 3: I think he still plays.
Speaker 2: Wow.
Speaker 3: And then everyone made fun of him for having blown
Speaker 3: off his fingers.
Speaker 2: I always love that.
Speaker 1: Meme that's like July third, It's like this is the
Speaker 1: last day for so many Americans to have all their
Speaker 1: ten fingers.
Speaker 2: It's like a meme that goes around. It's like, oh,
Speaker 2: that's so true.
Speaker 1: Yeah. I think they're extremely dangerous. I don't like when
Speaker 1: they shoot every different way. I like sparklers. They're tame,
Speaker 1: they're quiet, they're gentle.
Speaker 3: When I was in high school, they smell good. There
Speaker 3: was a couple of times, or maybe it was middle school,
Speaker 3: where one of my friends got a load of fireworks
Speaker 3: and then we would go into his backyard. We'd launch
Speaker 3: them at each other, of course, you guys, yeah, which
Speaker 3: was like I can't believe I didn't. I don't care.
Speaker 1: No, most of them don't like, I'm not even joking, Like,
Speaker 1: how how do you all not run into traffic? How
Speaker 1: do you all not get severe concussions every day? How
Speaker 1: are you not just constantly? I just it's amazing that
Speaker 1: you survived.
Speaker 3: Yeah, I don't know. I've been thrown through doors, thrown
Speaker 3: through a glass showcase, I've been body slammed through a table.
Speaker 3: I took somebody. I did a Mortal Kombat move to
Speaker 3: one of my friends in elementary school, and I broke
Speaker 3: his teeth off. Oh my god, I got I punched
Speaker 3: two people in the face by accident. I closed one
Speaker 3: some kid and went flying in the.
Speaker 2: Air like A punched two kids by accident.
Speaker 3: One of them was we were playing we were in
Speaker 3: elementary school. I think it might have been even sixth grade,
Speaker 3: and when we were playing the punching game where we'd
Speaker 3: punch each other and like at first it was just like, oh,
Speaker 3: I punched you in the leg, Now you punched me
Speaker 3: in the arm. And that was the game, and then
Speaker 3: we were it was after music class we put our
Speaker 3: recorders away and I was sitting there and I was like,
Speaker 3: oh yeah, I was like, I've got a good move
Speaker 3: to do. And I was like I'm going to go
Speaker 3: to punch him in the face and then the last
Speaker 3: second go down and hit him in the stomach, you know,
Speaker 3: because like a fake app and then I just punched
Speaker 3: him in the face. I like forgot to go down.
Speaker 1: Oh yeah, yeah, okay, I guess that's accidental, but not really.
Speaker 3: I don't know what. I had no control, but yeah,
Speaker 3: lots of that.
Speaker 1: It's so much of that. But what did you What
Speaker 1: did you do anything New Year's Eve? Did you weren't
Speaker 1: with that? Ali wasn't in town, so you didn't.
Speaker 3: Yeah, I just went home. I don't even know. If
Speaker 3: I noted that it was midnight, I might have even
Speaker 3: when this, when the clock struck midnight, I might have
Speaker 3: said to myself, Hey, you know, and that's it. Look
Speaker 3: at that and that was my New Year's if year
Speaker 3: com fine with by the way.
Speaker 2: But I don't even know. I just what did you know?
Speaker 2: What were you awake?
Speaker 4: Yes?
Speaker 2: I was awake. I actually watched a magic show on
Speaker 2: New Year's Eve? Like now I'm or like in person?
Speaker 2: Oh live in person?
Speaker 3: WHOA?
Speaker 4: So we had we had a party. I was in
Speaker 4: Utah and my sister hired a magician who came in.
Speaker 2: What for, like how many people?
Speaker 4: I would say maybe like fifteen people. That's cool half
Speaker 4: but like most Sorry.
Speaker 3: What that's sharp. It's just a magician. I'm just randomly.
Speaker 1: I just don't remember the guy's name. Oh that sucks.
Speaker 1: That's just so, that's like how comedy whatever. People go,
Speaker 1: I went to a comedy show and I go and
Speaker 1: they were great, and I go, who was it?
Speaker 2: They go, I don't know, And I'm like.
Speaker 4: Oh no, no, I hadn't remember, but I was sold
Speaker 4: on it. I'm like into magic now. I believe because
Speaker 4: no thing to believe in.
Speaker 2: All you believe in is a talent, right well.
Speaker 4: I believe in the talent being some kind of like
Speaker 4: weird force of nature.
Speaker 2: No that the force of nature is physics and all
Speaker 2: the rules apply. They're not just doing anything else. But
Speaker 2: it is cool magic.
Speaker 4: And the room was set up in the way where
Speaker 4: he was standing in front of a glass door, so
Speaker 4: I could kind of see what he would like from
Speaker 4: behind him, what he was doing, like through the reflection exactly.
Speaker 4: So I was like, oh, I'm totally going to see
Speaker 4: him putting stuff now anything I couldn't see anything, I
Speaker 4: can't do.
Speaker 2: I I don't like it. Because I want to just know.
Speaker 1: That's why I used to love that Pen and Teller
Speaker 1: show that would they would try to guess what the
Speaker 1: trick was and it was called like stump us or something,
Speaker 1: and they they would have magicians come in and perform
Speaker 1: for them, and they would figure they would like, tell
Speaker 1: the magician, is this how you do it? I don't
Speaker 1: even think they like said it too like out loud,
Speaker 1: but they were like, we're gonna whisper in your ear,
Speaker 1: like is this how you do it? And if it is,
Speaker 1: you have to like admit it. And then if you
Speaker 1: stump us, like you win a bunch of money. Yeah,
Speaker 1: because they've seen every magic trick in the.
Speaker 3: Book, they don't how it was done to the general
Speaker 3: public though they I don't think so.
Speaker 2: I think that's like against the rule book.
Speaker 3: There was a show back in maybe Rus development.
Speaker 2: That's how I know, Maian, Well, there.
Speaker 3: Was a show, a special show twenty years ago, you.
Speaker 1: Know, yes, where the guy wore a mask everything.
Speaker 3: Yeah, and there was a huge blowback in the magic
Speaker 3: community about it.
Speaker 2: I was probably inspired arrest of development was that guy?
Speaker 3: Yeah, Yeah, probably Joe.
Speaker 1: On the show as a magician and he's in the
Speaker 1: Magician's alliance and he he's getting kicked out of it,
Speaker 1: and like ed he, yeah, it's but they talk a
Speaker 1: lot about about revealing things and how you can't and yeah,
Speaker 1: that guy, that guy.
Speaker 3: He was excommunicated from the Magician's ALIGNE.
Speaker 2: How they know who it was, but they probably magicians probably.
Speaker 3: Know the figure. They knew this guy was. But the
Speaker 3: thing that magic. The mass magician was saying, listen, all
Speaker 3: of these tricks have been around for twenty to thirty years.
Speaker 3: I'm only showing you how these tricks are done because
Speaker 3: I think it's time for magic as an art for
Speaker 3: to move forward and move beyond these old saw an
Speaker 3: a woman in half tricks. Right, It's time for new stuff.
Speaker 3: We need an evolution, otherwise magic will die out. That
Speaker 3: was his In reality, he's just getting paid buttloads of
Speaker 3: money by Fox.
Speaker 2: Oh Man.
Speaker 1: David Blaine changed my life when I discovered him.
Speaker 2: My freshman year of high school.
Speaker 1: That's that show that aired on like it was like ABC,
Speaker 1: I think. And he was levitating and he was sticking
Speaker 1: things in his hand, and he was taking a chicken's
Speaker 1: head off and then they put the chicken's head back on.
Speaker 2: Yeah, and uh, I convinced my.
Speaker 1: Geometry teacher, mister Booth to clear a class so that
Speaker 1: we could we could show it, and I because my
Speaker 1: dad taped it, and I was like, mister Booth, I
Speaker 1: have a show that you're gonna be obsessed with because
Speaker 1: he you know, it's like magician Marie is like math.
Speaker 1: And he let me take over the class and show
Speaker 1: this video and it blew everyone's minds. I mean, David
Speaker 1: Blaine when he first showed up on the scene was insane. Yeah,
Speaker 1: and he still is. I like love watching any kind
Speaker 1: of celebrity. He's he's impressing, but sometimes it just gets
Speaker 1: too gross, Like I don't want to see needles going
Speaker 1: into flesh and I don't want to see a frog
Speaker 1: being eaten.
Speaker 2: I just.
Speaker 3: Yeah, that's a really good teacher. I mean he was awesome.
Speaker 3: You were passionate about something and then he lets you
Speaker 3: Booth express.
Speaker 4: That shout out before Yeah, what was that? You've brought
Speaker 4: mister Booth up before him?
Speaker 1: I love mister Booth. There's some hit When teachers are good, man,
Speaker 1: it sticks with you. I saw someone recently who went
Speaker 1: to Kirkwoo High schol Oh when I was in Hawaii.
Speaker 1: This guy came up to me and was like, he
Speaker 1: was eating dinner next to us, and we kept hearing
Speaker 1: their tables say Saint Louis, so we'd be like, what.
Speaker 1: And then he came up at the end of the
Speaker 1: meal and was like, I'm sorry, I don't.
Speaker 2: Even normally do this, but I was.
Speaker 1: I just discovered you, like I knew about you, but
Speaker 1: I saw the Golden Globes and I went on a
Speaker 1: deep dive about you. And I was reading your Wikipedia
Speaker 1: last night in bed with my boyfriend, and.
Speaker 2: I guessed because I went to Kirkwood High School too.
Speaker 2: Who I was like, oh my god. And then I
Speaker 2: was like, what teachers did you When did you graduate?
Speaker 1: He graduated in like two thousand and I think like
Speaker 1: eleven or fifteen, and I graduated in two thousand and two.
Speaker 2: So I was like, oh, this is gonna be rough.
Speaker 1: But I knew one teacher, Madame Calfus.
Speaker 3: Madam about her. We've talked about her best.
Speaker 1: She's the greatest woman alive. I love her so much.
Speaker 1: And she recently wrote to me because I had posted
Speaker 1: about how being vegetarian isn't enough, like the egg industry
Speaker 1: is disgusting, dairy industry is disgusting and like it's just
Speaker 1: it's a nice step, but it's not. It's I wish
Speaker 1: it were enough to is what I said. And she
Speaker 1: wrote to my Instagram story and said, your sister taught
Speaker 1: me this. I was a vegetarian for twenty years and
Speaker 1: I had no idea what was going on in those
Speaker 1: other industries. And your sister, who my sister is a Spanish,
Speaker 1: was a Spanish teacher at Kirkwand High School. Madame Calfuss
Speaker 1: was working with her then, even though I had her,
Speaker 1: She's been there for like thirty years. She said, my
Speaker 1: sister enlightened her and she's been vegan ever since. And
Speaker 1: I was so proud of my sister. I'm so proud
Speaker 1: of my sister. My sister is not a teacher anymore
Speaker 1: at Kirkwand High School. She abandoned her career because she
Speaker 1: just wanted to try something new at the age of
Speaker 1: thirty nine, and she is now working at a I'm
Speaker 1: not going to say the name of it, but like
Speaker 1: for people who want to redecorate their bathrooms, she's like
Speaker 1: helping them design and decorate their bathrooms, which is like
Speaker 1: she's so excited about it because she's like it's a
Speaker 1: thing that people are so excited about doing, like when
Speaker 1: you get a new because she works at like a
Speaker 1: nice place, right, so these people are getting like heated
Speaker 1: floors and like a big tub and a cow rack
Speaker 1: that heats the towels, and like really like a nice
Speaker 1: basin and like a nice toilet that raises when you
Speaker 1: walk in, like and so she's like helping people do
Speaker 1: something they're so excited about, you know, which is like
Speaker 1: it's a good point, and I'm so excited for her.
Speaker 2: And she just started this new job and that's amazing.
Speaker 3: Thirty nine to switch careers is like really difficult to do,
Speaker 3: and yeah, be pulling it off and be happy. That's
Speaker 3: a that's an incredible inspiring story.
Speaker 1: It took a while, though, I will say that she
Speaker 1: you know, she stopped teaching this past year.
Speaker 2: In May was her last month.
Speaker 1: And then she was looking all summer, looking all fall
Speaker 1: like trying hard and like managing being a mom for
Speaker 1: three kids and feeling like this is all I do
Speaker 1: now is these kids. And she was you know, did
Speaker 1: a bunch of things around the house and she just
Speaker 1: learned that she was like I think I like interior design,
Speaker 1: Like I think that's interesting to me. And she never
Speaker 1: really even thought of exploring it before. But then she
Speaker 1: was just like what could I do in this space?
Speaker 1: And she met with Chris's mom, who's an interior decorator,
Speaker 1: and she got really like a lot of help from her,
Speaker 1: Like she just asked around, like she just did it
Speaker 1: the right way. Yeah, And she's so bold to like
Speaker 1: take that risk. And you know, she went to school
Speaker 1: for teaching. She got so many degree she as a master's,
Speaker 1: she has, you know, like she put a lot into teaching.
Speaker 2: And to just say, you know what, maybe I didn't
Speaker 2: pick the right.
Speaker 1: Thing for myself. Now maybe that was right for me then,
Speaker 1: and I it wasn't a waste. I taught for ten
Speaker 1: years and you know, I'm ready to like I just
Speaker 1: I know that not everyone has the opportunity to do that,
Speaker 1: but I'm really it was inspiring to me.
Speaker 3: I highly recommend for any anybody if they say it's
Speaker 3: never too late. It is too late for some things,
Speaker 3: like you can't be like a professional basketball player, you
Speaker 3: can't even do I would even say, like you probably
Speaker 3: shouldn't even do comedy if you're like if you're like
Speaker 3: forty and you're like, let me try comedy, Like, I
Speaker 3: think it's probably too late. Everyone always says like it's.
Speaker 2: Gonna take years. Maybe you could be sixty. Yeah, it's
Speaker 2: gonna take twenty.
Speaker 1: It'll take ten years to find your voice, So by
Speaker 1: fifty you could.
Speaker 2: And you know.
Speaker 3: What, give me an example of any forty year old.
Speaker 2: Well, I don't think people do it, yeah, because there's
Speaker 2: no examples.
Speaker 3: I don't think it's possible.
Speaker 2: Honestly, I would think you.
Speaker 1: I don't think it's I really don't think it's possible
Speaker 1: if you have kids and you want to be a
Speaker 1: good parent and you want to be around. I truly
Speaker 1: don't think it's possible. I don't think I would be
Speaker 1: able to be this successful with kids.
Speaker 2: I just don't.
Speaker 1: And I don't think it's possible if you're not obsessed
Speaker 1: with it. Yeah, you just have to put in so
Speaker 1: many fucking hours. But if you are someone who has
Speaker 1: kids that are like grown, I could see committing enough
Speaker 1: time to it and becoming obsessed with it and getting
Speaker 1: good enough that then you are an old comedian who's
Speaker 1: like fresh on the scene, Like that's a thing that
Speaker 1: people are interested in. If someone's like really good at
Speaker 1: comedy and old you know, and like has a fresh.
Speaker 3: Every time I see someone who's like starting off comedy
Speaker 3: and they're like, you know, fifty five or sixty or something. Yeah,
Speaker 3: their comedy styling is always like borsch Belts, like if
Speaker 3: it's always back when before they had kids.
Speaker 2: What they remember is example of someone.
Speaker 1: Miss Pat is someone who got like I don't even
Speaker 1: know how old she is because she looks ageless, but
Speaker 1: I'm guessing she's she looks in her thirties, and I'm
Speaker 1: serious about that, but I'm guessing she's in her mid
Speaker 1: to late fifties.
Speaker 3: I have her how old it's public information at fifty two.
Speaker 1: Oh shit, sorry, miss Pat, but you look in your thirties.
Speaker 1: I was just like adding up because I just I
Speaker 1: thought your story was that you were older.
Speaker 2: But she looks amazing. She is amazing. But she got
Speaker 2: her start kind of late, I think.
Speaker 1: Yeah, and she was she got shot sure tit got
Speaker 1: shot off. She was like, she hasn't a crazy life.
Speaker 1: She was she had so many kids at a really
Speaker 1: young age. She was on welfare. She was working at McDonald's.
Speaker 1: Jimmy Carter came in. She had a great story she
Speaker 1: told on Kimmel. But she lived like a thousand lives
Speaker 1: and then started comedy. And she only started comedy because
Speaker 1: of her I think her welfare person, the person who
Speaker 1: she like checked in with or whatever, said you're so funny.
Speaker 2: Yeah.
Speaker 1: Her caseworker said you should try comedy, and then she did. Yeah,
Speaker 1: and then she was great at it. Okay, So here
Speaker 1: she's she is a fresh perspective.
Speaker 3: She was She started comedy in two thousand and two,
Speaker 3: so she was thirty when she started, which I think
Speaker 3: that's probably the I can't imagine being fifty five or
Speaker 3: or fifty and starting and then actually like just being
Speaker 3: willing to go to open mics and then like kiss
Speaker 3: asked you a bunch of twenty year olds to try
Speaker 3: to get on a comedy show.
Speaker 1: Honestly, think you have a better chance of becoming super
Speaker 1: famous as a woman in her that or man in
Speaker 1: your fifties starting comedy and throwing yourself into it as
Speaker 1: fully as you would have got your in your twenties
Speaker 1: than you do in your twenties. Because there are so
Speaker 1: many people in the twenties. It's a way to stand
Speaker 1: you stand out out.
Speaker 4: Okay, Jason Ellis started.
Speaker 3: I think, but no, I disagree because it's been a
Speaker 3: long time. It's been a long time, Nikki since you've
Speaker 3: been to open mics. And I will say, you go
Speaker 3: to open mics, especially in LA, there are fifty year
Speaker 3: olds there. There are people.
Speaker 1: All they have like a vibe of, like we know,
Speaker 1: the vibe that they're bringing in. They're not bringing in
Speaker 1: a vibe of like dedicated, being obsessed with it. They're
Speaker 1: giving a vibe of like they like they just need
Speaker 1: a place to hang out.
Speaker 3: Well, no, they're all No, I totally agree with that.
Speaker 3: Now they are not all. There's a bunch I've seen
Speaker 3: that are like they have like a baby reindeer style
Speaker 3: of comedy that they're trying to push on the open
Speaker 3: mic people.
Speaker 1: Yeah, we have to go to break That is such
Speaker 1: a good point. But I do think it's never too
Speaker 1: late for comedy. And I think that if you if
Speaker 1: you just got to put in the work, maybe give
Speaker 1: ten years.
Speaker 3: I just don't want you to start because there's threat
Speaker 3: to you.
Speaker 2: You're there's no threat.
Speaker 1: To you, because they would be than you if they started.
Speaker 1: How old are you, Brian, Okay, start.
Speaker 2: To stop.
Speaker 1: I know I know that feeling, I know that feeling,
Speaker 1: but it's it's an illusion. No it's not.
Speaker 2: There's not a room for all of us. Okay, we'll
Speaker 2: be right back. Okay.
Speaker 1: So we wanted to talk about a thing that's been
Speaker 1: happening since the Globes and then since the fires after
Speaker 1: the Globes, is that during the Golden Globes, during what
Speaker 1: we called a halftime show, a halftime report, I did
Speaker 1: this thing from the floor where I was like amongst
Speaker 1: the celebrities and I was talking about, you know, the
Speaker 1: stats of the show. And it started out in the
Speaker 1: writer's room as like we were going to do like
Speaker 1: an official kind of you know football kind of NFL
Speaker 1: you know, halftime report.
Speaker 3: It also came from like from the from day one,
Speaker 3: we were saying, we want to do like TNF style
Speaker 3: jokes football, Yeah, there's any football styles jokes about what
Speaker 3: just happened, and that that kind of so good.
Speaker 1: At writing jokes hours before, like about the thing that
Speaker 1: you just watched.
Speaker 2: Right, So we were like, oh, we can easily do this.
Speaker 1: Let's like take the first half of the show and
Speaker 1: let's write a bunch of jokes about things that happened.
Speaker 2: Like there's nothing more fun. And that's why people are
Speaker 2: live tweeting.
Speaker 1: They want to see jokes about what they're watching, and
Speaker 1: then award shows get away from that because they stick
Speaker 1: to the script and it's like, let's leave this part
Speaker 1: in the show that is just for for We'll have
Speaker 1: a selective group of people in the in the room
Speaker 1: watching the feed and just writing this halftime report that
Speaker 1: that I will then be able to go over with
Speaker 1: them because I have a lot of time in between
Speaker 1: when I have to go out, that we can go
Speaker 1: over and make a half thing.
Speaker 3: Less time than we thought because you did an incredible
Speaker 3: which elevated the show ten costume change. I don't think
Speaker 3: we talked about that how much that how much that
Speaker 3: elevated the show for you to do ten wardrobe changes
Speaker 3: during the course of the show.
Speaker 2: People did very much like it.
Speaker 3: Yeah. No, it made it like, oh, this is a thing.
Speaker 2: Which she's gonna be in next.
Speaker 3: It's something for other people. It's like, maybe not for
Speaker 3: me because I'm not a fashioned person, but there are
Speaker 3: people watching this who are interested in that.
Speaker 2: And people loved it.
Speaker 3: Yeah, I mean that was an increase. I don't know
Speaker 3: whose idea that was, it was your idea or someone else's,
Speaker 3: but to do that many wardrobe changes was a great idea.
Speaker 1: Well, I think it just goes with if we just
Speaker 1: found out how many times I was potentially gonna be
Speaker 1: in the show, and we were like, Okay, let's just
Speaker 1: do a different look for each one, because why wouldn't
Speaker 1: we like.
Speaker 3: Every But I don't think did Tina and Amy do that?
Speaker 3: Did Seth Meyers do it? Definitely not.
Speaker 2: I don't think men do it. I don't think anyone cares.
Speaker 1: But I think, yeah, it was really it was really
Speaker 1: fun and it made it fun for me, and it is.
Speaker 1: It's nice to give the audience something new to look at,
Speaker 1: you know, like they've jokes, no matter how good the
Speaker 1: jokes are. It's like, I do care about what I
Speaker 1: wear because I do think talking is boring no matter
Speaker 1: what you're doing. If I were singing and dancing, I
Speaker 1: could maybe stay in an outfit the whole time. But
Speaker 1: even that, like you watched Taylor Swift, you watch Beyond
Speaker 1: say they're making outfit changes throughout the whole show because
Speaker 1: not because they want to show you different looks, yes,
Speaker 1: but because there it's part of keeping people's focus and
Speaker 1: entertaining people like you. Don't you think that sometimes outfit
Speaker 1: changes or changing up your glam is just some kind
Speaker 1: of like vapid thing, like I just want to look
Speaker 1: hot in different ways. It's like, no, you want to
Speaker 1: keep people interested. Newness is part of the performance, and
Speaker 1: I do think it matters what you wear on stage,
Speaker 1: and I do take care in that because I do
Speaker 1: think watching, especially in my stand up, watching someone talk
Speaker 1: on stage for an hour is can get boring.
Speaker 2: Yeah, no matter what.
Speaker 1: There's valleys, you know, for peaks to happen, their valleys,
Speaker 1: and during those valleys, just take a look.
Speaker 2: At my legs. I don't give a shit.
Speaker 1: Take a look at my shoes, look at my Bunion's like,
Speaker 1: I'll give you some things to look at.
Speaker 2: See if can see my skirt, I don't know. Just
Speaker 2: have some fun. Maybe you'll catch a nip slip. Maybe
Speaker 2: you'll see my underwear line.
Speaker 3: I don't.
Speaker 1: It's just like give them something else. Anyway, that was
Speaker 1: a really fun thing. But during this halftime show.
Speaker 3: I actually have it queued up. I can play it on.
Speaker 2: The Okay, Yeah, here is what I said.
Speaker 3: It's the moment. This is not the whole halftime yes.
Speaker 2: Part of this part of it.
Speaker 1: Past and crew are leading the way with eleven mentions
Speaker 1: and this is like breaking down the thank you thing
Speaker 1: strong with three shout outs God, creator of the universe,
Speaker 1: zero mentions, and Mario Lopez, host of Access Hollywood won
Speaker 1: all right, no surprise in this godless town.
Speaker 3: So that's the that's the moment in question, and by
Speaker 3: the way, it absolutely crushed. I mean, was so funny.
Speaker 1: So fun like there are moments in comedy where you
Speaker 1: like have said things like we I probably rehearsed that
Speaker 1: three times.
Speaker 2: I probably said that.
Speaker 3: We didn't even know the numbers. We didn't know that
Speaker 3: Kieran Colkin was gonna mention Mario Lopez until he did.
Speaker 1: So we were we were waiting for like something funny
Speaker 1: to put in that fourth category.
Speaker 2: We knew God.
Speaker 1: We were hoping God maybe had zero mentions. That's what
Speaker 1: we like had predicted and it true.
Speaker 4: And we were just so you that that night it
Speaker 4: wasn't like well planned.
Speaker 2: That was like a couple days before.
Speaker 1: Was part of the part of this breakdown would be
Speaker 1: we fill in the stats there of like thank yous, right,
Speaker 1: and so we predicted there'd be agents and reps, and
Speaker 1: then we predicted there'd be like a wife section and
Speaker 1: then but in uh moms or whatever, and then we
Speaker 1: predicted God's with zero. That was just like a placeholder
Speaker 1: for like, this could be funny because we actually pitched
Speaker 1: it to do with someone at first where I would
Speaker 1: be joined by someone else, so we had to we
Speaker 1: had to write out a script predicting what would how
Speaker 1: funny it could be to present to the person to
Speaker 1: sign on to do it with me, and they ended
Speaker 1: up signing on. But then we changed kind of the
Speaker 1: format of it, and we were like, we don't we
Speaker 1: were gonna make it very sports centery with graphics and
Speaker 1: me holding a mic with a little you know, the
Speaker 1: label on it, and potentially some sports people involved, and
Speaker 1: then we just kind of made it like we don't
Speaker 1: need to do all that, like it'll that'll be already implied.
Speaker 2: We did it would talk perfect. Yeah.
Speaker 3: That was one of I think a hundred different literal
Speaker 3: game time decisions that we made correctly. I mean, there
Speaker 3: were so many things, so many that were like A
Speaker 3: or B, choice A or choice B, and we just
Speaker 3: nailed it every single time. And looking back, it's just
Speaker 3: like the roast. There were some choices that if we
Speaker 3: went in the opposite direction, that would have tanked the
Speaker 3: whole thing. Yeah, there's one in particular I'm thinking about
Speaker 3: during the halftime show that's like if we did that, oh.
Speaker 2: No, that would have been bad.
Speaker 1: Yeah, and you know who said, let's like who was
Speaker 1: just not feeling that was Chris Convey was like, I
Speaker 1: just think it's about and then it just takes one
Speaker 1: person to go I don't know. And then I see
Speaker 1: that and I go, wait, do you not know?
Speaker 2: Does anyone else not know about this?
Speaker 1: And then someone else goes, I don't know either, and
Speaker 1: then we all suddenly realize, oh, we all are kind
Speaker 1: of like not on board with us as much as
Speaker 1: we thought, because yeah, it also can go in the
Speaker 1: other direction that way of like do you like that?
Speaker 1: Like popular was a perfect example of that, being like
Speaker 1: does everyone can everyone want to.
Speaker 2: Admit that we love this?
Speaker 1: And we were like yeah, and we were like kind
Speaker 1: of embarrassed too, because everyone's like at first, like, uh,
Speaker 1: I think it's fun, you know, but yeah, we made
Speaker 1: a decision not to make it all blow it out
Speaker 1: like very sportsy and not brand it so much and
Speaker 1: just like have me talking in that kind of cadence
Speaker 1: was kind of the decision I made.
Speaker 3: We need to learn that lesson by the way, let's
Speaker 3: we should flag that because this is the second time
Speaker 3: it happened on the Roast, and it happened on the
Speaker 3: Golden Globes where we were going to do this thing
Speaker 3: where we're like targeting somebody and it was like just
Speaker 3: kind of like mean, and we cut it at the
Speaker 3: last second and we didn't regret it. So next time
Speaker 3: we should just know, Yeah, maybe not targeting someone and
Speaker 3: hitting them hard for no reason is not the way
Speaker 3: to go.
Speaker 2: No, it's not.
Speaker 1: And it was it even though the person we were
Speaker 1: going to target I love so much and I knew
Speaker 1: that it was gonna it was going to come from
Speaker 1: a place of love of like it it tonally could
Speaker 1: have been misconstrued and it would have. It was I'm
Speaker 1: so glad we didn't do that.
Speaker 2: Yeah, so glad.
Speaker 1: And there was another moment too where we were going
Speaker 1: to like say kind of a roast type joke at
Speaker 1: someone that I interacted with, and I cut that joke
Speaker 1: last second. And then let's not even talk about the
Speaker 1: rock joke, Like, I'm so excited we didn't do rock too,
Speaker 1: Like not the rock, but the joke that had the
Speaker 1: word rock in it. Yeah, there were so many like
Speaker 1: we just made we made very good choices. My only
Speaker 1: regret is not saying wicked table, you're gonna love this
Speaker 1: before popular only regret and I wish we wouldn't have
Speaker 1: had the spotlight. I wish it would have just left
Speaker 1: it on the normal, Like I don't think we needed
Speaker 1: that to make it seem like it was like this moment,
Speaker 1: but I don't think it hurt it. But I don't
Speaker 1: think it needed it. Those and then I have a
Speaker 1: couple more. I mean I could go on it.
Speaker 2: All the time.
Speaker 1: So anyway, this so that part of the show people
Speaker 1: have been I first saw it. Oh, Mike Lawrence was
Speaker 1: the first person to write on I think Tuesday when
Speaker 1: the fire started, like, maybe you guys should have thanked
Speaker 1: God more.
Speaker 2: Mike Lawrence, one of our writers, like was like.
Speaker 1: Oh, as we pointed out on the show, maybe if
Speaker 1: you would have thanked more, this wouldn't be happening. He
Speaker 1: was obviously joking, and I don't think anyone saw that
Speaker 1: and then extrapolated from it. I think it was just
Speaker 1: you know, uh, he was parallel thought with some crazy people.
Speaker 1: So then there's been all these evangelical people we.
Speaker 3: Don't know evangelical Catholic.
Speaker 2: It's not no Catholics love me.
Speaker 1: Catholics wrote about me and their news letter in the
Speaker 1: number in the number one Catholic newsletter Serious Magazine, they
Speaker 1: wrote about how Nikki Glazer called out godless Hollywood. Yeah, oh,
Speaker 1: by the way, got that part where it was like
Speaker 1: no surprise in this godless town that was in the
Speaker 1: script and then got taken out, and I put it
Speaker 1: back in because I and you could hear me kind
Speaker 1: of like wait, and then I just pulled it out
Speaker 1: of my brain to say it, even though I didn't
Speaker 1: write it initially. It was just an earlier script and
Speaker 1: got taken out of the prompter. But I'm glad I
Speaker 1: said it because it just made me laugh and I
Speaker 1: liked say godless town.
Speaker 2: I like the like cadence of it. And it ended
Speaker 2: up being.
Speaker 1: A really famous person's favorite favorite You know, that day
Speaker 1: that I was on the podcast and I got a
Speaker 1: text from a really famous person. Yeah, that person, the
Speaker 1: most famous person I know, was like I loved this
Speaker 1: one joke and that was that person's favorite joke.
Speaker 2: And I and if no one.
Speaker 1: Else liked that joke, it was like worth it to
Speaker 1: tell it because that person loved it. But anyway, people
Speaker 1: have been making these videos saying that, like I I
Speaker 1: am responsible for the fires, and they don't even understand
Speaker 1: that I was calling out people not thanking God, and
Speaker 1: by the way, I was doing it sarcastically, which they
Speaker 1: don't even catch. They're just taking it the wrong way,
Speaker 1: thinking that I'm saying, don't thank God. That's good to
Speaker 1: not thank God, even though my.
Speaker 3: Characters like the Crow, God Joke and the entire ever
Speaker 3: bettered in Hollywood in the last thirty years, where we
Speaker 3: said no one thanked God.
Speaker 1: What the fuck's wrong with you? Yes, is what we've said.
Speaker 1: That's what we're blaming me. But I'm like, no, I
Speaker 1: was pointing out the right thing.
Speaker 3: Saying, now you're a responsible And some of the comments
Speaker 3: are so mean. They're like every tear shed because of
Speaker 3: the fires is Nicki Glazer's fault. They're saying like, I
Speaker 3: hope you suffer, I hope your career, I hope you die.
Speaker 1: Like I haven't read any of this, but honestly, these
Speaker 1: don't hurt my feelings at all.
Speaker 2: They're from batshit crazy people.
Speaker 3: And what's interesting is that I'd say, out of every
Speaker 3: single comment I've read, except maybe one because I'm like,
Speaker 3: I'm engaged and I'm kind of engaging with them on
Speaker 3: the instagram on Niki Glazer Pod Instagram because oh god,
Speaker 3: you all they made like a we we posted a
Speaker 3: clip of something that's not even this clip.
Speaker 2: Stupid, it's not even you like these people? What's wrong
Speaker 2: with them? Do they not understand comedy?
Speaker 3: What?
Speaker 1: Like?
Speaker 2: Okay, tell me what you're doing.
Speaker 3: It's not even this clip. We posted a clip about
Speaker 3: what do we post Noah this week on the Nicki
Speaker 3: Glazer Pod Instagram.
Speaker 2: It was it was about the making of popular.
Speaker 3: It was about the making of popular. It wasn't even
Speaker 3: about the godless town. And yet there's all these people
Speaker 3: who are commenting on it, flocking from these areas. And
Speaker 3: what's interesting is like, except for one person, I think
Speaker 3: ninety nine percent of the people are not from America.
Speaker 3: They're from South America, like Brazil, Ecuador, or they're from
Speaker 3: Southeast Asia. So yes, there must have been some influencer
Speaker 3: on TikTok that's from a foreign country who was ground
Speaker 3: zero for this conspiracy theory and who spread it and
Speaker 3: then sent all of their followers to go attack us.
Speaker 1: And I'm getting emails and my email is not even
Speaker 1: out there, like as these people are just taking a
Speaker 1: wild stab in the dark what my email might be, yeah,
Speaker 1: and finding ways to say it's all your fault. And
Speaker 1: then Sara Lena on The Girls Chat Today sent a
Speaker 1: link that said, my mom is really excited because you
Speaker 1: are going viral in the Philippines and she didn't realize
Speaker 1: she was sending me like a thing that was like
Speaker 1: this woman should burn in hell, right because it's all
Speaker 1: in like Filipino. Is that is that the language? Uh?
Speaker 3: Filipino? I think that's what they that's direct.
Speaker 1: Yes they are, but I don't think that's the language.
Speaker 1: I think it's like something. I don't I'm sorry, I
Speaker 1: don't know what it is. I'm glad I don't because
Speaker 1: I don't want to hear things about me. No, it's uh,
Speaker 1: it's it makes me really happy.
Speaker 3: I love.
Speaker 1: Okay, great, you're correct, Thanks, Okay, good, I'm thank God.
Speaker 2: Yeah it's but I thank God.
Speaker 1: Yeah, thanking God. By the way, I do believe in
Speaker 1: a higher power. I don't do God, but I'm not
Speaker 1: a godless person and I would never thank God in
Speaker 1: a speech though, because I think that's insane to think
Speaker 1: that they would have any say in me winning a
Speaker 1: Golden Globe.
Speaker 2: It just doesn't seem right.
Speaker 3: I forgot who there was a comedian or somebody who
Speaker 3: posted this who said, like the audacity of people to right. Yeah,
Speaker 3: you know what it is. I don't remember it exactly.
Speaker 1: I think I told it on the podcast, but it's
Speaker 1: Ricky Gervay is telling when people pray to God for
Speaker 1: their keys, the the arrogance that God would help you
Speaker 1: find your keys when he didn't.
Speaker 2: Stop the Holocaust.
Speaker 3: Yeah, exactly.
Speaker 2: It's like it's just it's perfect.
Speaker 3: And by the way, where were these people when Ricky
Speaker 3: Gervais was hosting the Golden Globes, a man whose entire
Speaker 3: career is based on mocking God openly?
Speaker 2: How come?
Speaker 3: How come God didn't light La on fire? And Ricky
Speaker 3: Gervais hosted the Golden Globes and all and out of
Speaker 3: all of the godless things that happened in Los Angeles,
Speaker 3: all of the crimes and sins, do you think it
Speaker 3: was a joke that was told in the Golden Globes
Speaker 3: that made him decide to set it on fire? Right?
Speaker 4: And like if I like, for all the people who
Speaker 4: are super stuff, sorry, like what is God evil? Like,
Speaker 4: why would God do that? That's not like the purpose
Speaker 4: of God. He doesn't like God?
Speaker 2: Who are are?
Speaker 3: Well, that's that's some jew shit and these people.
Speaker 2: Because why wasn't I struck down that night?
Speaker 1: Well?
Speaker 3: Yeah, I mean George Carlin did that in one of
Speaker 3: his stand up specials. He said, if God exists, may him,
Speaker 3: may he strike me down right now? And he said
Speaker 3: that on a stage. And God didn't do it. It
Speaker 3: took thirty five years, took him. Yeah, it took him longer. Yeah,
Speaker 3: Because here's the thing I believe is that I believe
Speaker 3: in God. I fear God. I don't think God cares
Speaker 3: like about these things. I don't think I think he's
Speaker 3: got bigger problems. If it's truly the creator of the universe,
Speaker 3: Earth isn't even probably on his top ten of planets.
Speaker 3: So the narcissism to think that the one creator of
Speaker 3: the universe is like focused on a joke set at
Speaker 3: the Golden globes and will destroy the lives of millions
Speaker 3: because of that joke is egotistical to the max.
Speaker 1: I'm so happy that this doesn't bother me at all.
Speaker 1: If anything, it makes me very proud because my dad,
Speaker 1: like is such an atheist that he like, there's no
Speaker 1: there would be no better flight achievement for me than
Speaker 1: to pick like to piss off all these like really
Speaker 1: these zelots, you know, these insane people, and so it
Speaker 1: makes there's something in me that feels good about that,
Speaker 1: and there's no part of me that's like it. Honestly,
Speaker 1: I wouldn't care if I came across like people calling
Speaker 1: me a bad person because you know, I upset God
Speaker 1: because I just don't believe that's true. But then it's
Speaker 1: it only hurts me when people say something that I
Speaker 1: believe is true about myself, Like that's really the only
Speaker 1: time that I feel But I will say there was
Speaker 1: a thing that I'm trying. Okay, So I'm I got.
Speaker 1: I bought this book called Let Them by Mel Robbins
Speaker 1: that I saw Oprah say was like a book that
Speaker 1: changed her life, and I've gotten. You know, I think
Speaker 1: two of the girls shack girls on it, Laura and
Speaker 1: uh Sarah Lena and yes, Laura, I just said your
Speaker 1: name the way it's sounds like it's supposed to be
Speaker 1: for not Lara, even though it Laura.
Speaker 2: Uh, Hella, Hella's reading it.
Speaker 1: And Sara Lena and it's just about you know, when
Speaker 1: someone's mad at you, when you know person in front
Speaker 1: of you is driving too slow, when someone's being irrational,
Speaker 1: if your boss is blaming you for something, you just
Speaker 1: let them and then you seriously, when you let them
Speaker 1: about something, it gives you a superiority that is not
Speaker 1: what you should stay in, but it gets you out
Speaker 1: of that feeling of like, uh. But because you sometimes
Speaker 1: need a feeling of superiority just to get out of
Speaker 1: a feeling of shame, right, so it lifts you up
Speaker 1: suddenly to be like, let them, I don't care, I'm unbothered.
Speaker 1: I'm better than all of it. And then you do
Speaker 1: the next thing, which is let me. And that's where
Speaker 1: you go back down. You take that superiority and you
Speaker 1: get back down to right sized where you go, what
Speaker 1: can I do?
Speaker 2: So, Okay, you know so and so is mad at me.
Speaker 1: Let them be mad, and then let me understand that,
Speaker 1: you know, maybe I have something to do with the
Speaker 1: fact that they're mad. How can I be a better person?
Speaker 1: Let me focus on things that actually matter, like what
Speaker 1: you can do. So anyway, it's really helped me. It's
Speaker 1: helped Saralina said. It's helped her. But I was talking
Speaker 1: to my therapist yesterday.
Speaker 2: About how.
Speaker 1: I am doing a lot better with people being like
Speaker 1: mad at me or not liking me and it not
Speaker 1: affecting me, And because there was a certain person that
Speaker 1: got really really upset with me recently and really let
Speaker 1: me have it, and they were really actually very right
Speaker 1: to be mad at me, and I felt like at
Speaker 1: my first instinct was like, oh shit, I really shouldn't
Speaker 1: have done that thing that made them mad, and like
Speaker 1: why did I do that? And all the things that
Speaker 1: you go through when someone's mad at you and you
Speaker 1: actually feel shame about it. And I was headed to
Speaker 1: Hawaii when this is going down, and I'm getting these
Speaker 1: texts that are very angry from this person, and I
Speaker 1: could see in Chris's.
Speaker 2: Eyes him being like, oh no, our trip is ruined.
Speaker 1: Like NICKI can't handle someone being mad at her and
Speaker 1: she's not being able to fix this. This person is
Speaker 1: not accepting her apology. It's just it's never they're never
Speaker 1: going to This person is like done with Nicki and
Speaker 1: is like truly telling her like, don't ever talk.
Speaker 2: To me again.
Speaker 1: And I could see Chris kind of like panigan, and
Speaker 1: even I was like, oh fuck, this is about to
Speaker 1: ruin my trip. And then I just apologized and I
Speaker 1: just was like and owned it and said, yeah, I
Speaker 1: regret doing that thing, and I'll always be sorry for
Speaker 1: this and I can't take it back, and it's taught
Speaker 1: me to be a better person. I won't make this
Speaker 1: mistake again in other ways, said my piece, and I
Speaker 1: was like, didn't think about it at all, And this
Speaker 1: is someone whose opinion I would have guessed matters very
Speaker 1: deeply to me. What this person thinks about me, And
Speaker 1: I just didn't care because I couldn't. I couldn't control it.
Speaker 1: And thank god, it was like right on the.
Speaker 2: Right.
Speaker 1: It happened right as I downloaded the book let them,
Speaker 1: so I had read like ten pages of it and
Speaker 1: kind of got the gist of it. And I just
Speaker 1: was like, let let them be mad at me. Let
Speaker 1: them like, I can't control it. Did you care if
Speaker 1: they accepted your apology or not?
Speaker 3: No?
Speaker 1: That was another thing, was like I knew in my
Speaker 1: heart that I was sorry, and it wasn't just a placeholder.
Speaker 2: I wasn't just placating them.
Speaker 1: I knew, and I also knew that I will I
Speaker 1: wouldn't have done that had I given it more thought,
Speaker 1: and I won't do it to someone again. I will
Speaker 1: it will change the way I behave in the future.
Speaker 1: So I came from this a better person, and I
Speaker 1: really there was nothing I could have done to prevent it,
Speaker 1: Like I didn't think about this person's feelings when I
Speaker 1: did the thing, and there was no way that I
Speaker 1: should have there no, there was no I should you know,
Speaker 1: obviously I should have, but there was no part of
Speaker 1: me that could have in that moment I was. I
Speaker 1: was not in a state of mind when I hurt
Speaker 1: this person's feelings to have protected their feelings.
Speaker 2: I just I forgave myself for it.
Speaker 1: And it doesn't matter if they forgive me I they
Speaker 1: get to be whatever they're gonna be. I can't change it.
Speaker 1: And it was so freeing I didn't think about it
Speaker 1: at all. I even thought, I'm not even gonna be
Speaker 1: able to interact with this person's work anymore, because this
Speaker 1: is someone whose work you could probably consume, each of
Speaker 1: us could consume. And I thought, oh, I really like
Speaker 1: this person's work. If I see it out in the
Speaker 1: world now, I'll probably have to like swipe away from
Speaker 1: it really quick and stop listening or stop watching whatever
Speaker 1: it is.
Speaker 2: And I came across this person's.
Speaker 1: Work and I loved it and was able to sit
Speaker 1: through it and enjoy it. And that was huge for
Speaker 1: me because in the past, you know, my whole Taylor
Speaker 1: Swift story, when I like said those things about her
Speaker 1: and ended up in her documentary. I couldn't like listen
Speaker 1: to Taylor Swift after that because I was like, I
Speaker 1: hurt Taylor Swift. And then I was able to after
Speaker 1: I apologize publicly, even before she wrote on it, I
Speaker 1: was able to listen to her again. But like hurting
Speaker 1: someone even if I just like can't even if I
Speaker 1: loved them, it's like makes it hard for me to
Speaker 1: enjoy their product anymore.
Speaker 3: Yeah, but this guy Michael Jackson, where it's like, are
Speaker 3: we allowed? Can we listen to Michael Jackson because he
Speaker 3: did all those things, then you kind of have to
Speaker 3: get over it. I'm having that now with Kanye where
Speaker 3: it's like I really like Kanye's music, but he hates juice.
Speaker 1: I I know, I'm able to separate the artist. Yeah,
Speaker 1: I think from almost everything all the time, but this
Speaker 1: time I was really happy about it. But I will
Speaker 1: say my friend ran into she's a huge Harry Styles
Speaker 1: fan and she ran into Harry Styles in the street
Speaker 1: after his concert.
Speaker 2: I think I maybe told this. I'm sorry if I did,
Speaker 2: and she.
Speaker 1: Asked for his picture and he said no, very politely
Speaker 1: because if what I know this too, just from being
Speaker 1: a minuscule, like you know, famous, is that when one
Speaker 1: person does it, other people see and then they start.
Speaker 2: Being like, who is that in the car?
Speaker 1: And I can only imagine that at Harry Styles level,
Speaker 1: it would be a line down the fucking block. So
Speaker 1: he was just like no, because he hadn't been noticed yet.
Speaker 1: She was the first person to kind of be like,
Speaker 1: is that you know? And so he's very polite and
Speaker 1: said no, I'm sorry, And she was so humiliated that
Speaker 1: he said no that she literally can't listen to his
Speaker 1: music gets embarrassed even hearing it because she was so embarrassed,
Speaker 1: even though he wasn't mad at her.
Speaker 2: He was very polite, but you know, just to be
Speaker 2: told no by something.
Speaker 3: At the after party of the roast, I went up
Speaker 3: to Gronk and I was gonna ask him for a
Speaker 3: photo and he like totally ignored me and boxed my out.
Speaker 3: And now I can't listen to his music anymore.
Speaker 2: What a shame?
Speaker 1: Yeah, yeah, it's uh. But I will say that I
Speaker 1: had my therapy session yesterday and I told my therapist
Speaker 1: about this moment and she was like, and I was
Speaker 1: talking about my friends, and I was like, I've noticed
Speaker 1: my friends and I don't know if i've it was
Speaker 1: ever this way, but I have a couple friends, including
Speaker 1: one of our close friends, and then some girls on
Speaker 1: the girls chat who and I don't understand this. Maybe
Speaker 1: help me understand this, both of you. If, like the
Speaker 1: other day, I think I could share this, I'll check
Speaker 1: with her and maybe we'll take it out. But I
Speaker 1: think it'll be fine.
Speaker 2: Sarah Lena said that she like she was walking.
Speaker 1: Into a coffee shop or something and she didn't see
Speaker 1: this woman behind her who was like older and probably
Speaker 1: needed help with the door, and she didn't like push
Speaker 1: the door open more, and she saw it too late
Speaker 1: to help the woman with the door, and she was like,
Speaker 1: this woman thinks I'm a terrible person and is going
Speaker 1: to be mad at me, And she like was still
Speaker 1: struggling with this feeling hours later, after this stranger might
Speaker 1: have thought she was a bitch.
Speaker 2: For me in that moment, I might be like, oh.
Speaker 1: This is awkward in the coffee shop, and she might
Speaker 1: think I'm a bit, but it probably I know that
Speaker 1: I'm not and that it was an accident, And so
Speaker 1: even if she be mad, I just wouldn't. I don't
Speaker 1: think ever a version of me before or after let
Speaker 1: them the book would have cared what this stranger thinks
Speaker 1: because I know that I'm not a bitch and I
Speaker 1: just didn't see her.
Speaker 2: Would you guys.
Speaker 1: Carry that with you all day? Our other friend was
Speaker 1: at dinner and was thought this guy was mad at him.
Speaker 1: Remember that thing.
Speaker 2: I talked about.
Speaker 1: Remember, Sean was like, that guy hates me because.
Speaker 3: Yeah, thinks about everybody all the time.
Speaker 2: Yeah, but what is that?
Speaker 1: Like? That makes me so sad for people to think
Speaker 1: that strangers might hate you.
Speaker 2: Noah, do you relate to this? I don't relate to that.
Speaker 4: But I think it has more to do with our
Speaker 4: friends wanting to be good people rather than if people.
Speaker 2: Don't like them. You know, like, does this mean that
Speaker 2: I'm a bad person?
Speaker 1: But like, I guess that's it's an insecurity on like
Speaker 1: a level that I don't like. It's like it's almost
Speaker 1: like they because that's what I was trying to say
Speaker 1: to Sara and is like, if you are certain that
Speaker 1: you're a good person, no matter what other people think,
Speaker 1: it won't matter. And you're doubting that about yourself, And
Speaker 1: as soon as you're able to solidify that and know
Speaker 1: that it won't matter what other people.
Speaker 2: Think, you're right. And I think is a good person.
Speaker 2: She's one of the best people I know.
Speaker 1: She would ever like leave anyone in the lurch or
Speaker 1: like wanting she would like buy someone a door that
Speaker 1: would be easier for them to open, Like she's the
Speaker 1: most giving person ever. So for her to feel that
Speaker 1: way was it just like it makes me so mad
Speaker 1: because I just want to like, I don't want.
Speaker 2: Her to enough to suffer with that.
Speaker 3: There are so many times that I feel like people
Speaker 3: think I'm weird or something, and so it happens so
Speaker 3: often to me that I think I'm immune to like out, yeah,
Speaker 3: how strangers feel about me, because I'm just can't do
Speaker 3: that every single day all day.
Speaker 1: That's what my therapist said. She was like, Nikki, you
Speaker 1: I the reason you are better at this now is
Speaker 1: because you've had more experience with it than other people.
Speaker 1: Of people, strangers having opinions about you and you've just
Speaker 1: gotten immune to it or because you.
Speaker 2: Gotten used to it.
Speaker 1: It's like exposure therapy, because it used to be a
Speaker 1: crippling thing to me. If like people that cared about
Speaker 1: didn't like me, right, like yeah, people, I know people
Speaker 1: are going to encounter and now even that I don't care.
Speaker 1: And I never thought it would be something that I
Speaker 1: could get used to or like have experience with enough
Speaker 1: or get my ten thousand hours of being judged that
Speaker 1: you just let it go. But I really feel like
Speaker 1: it's such an accomplishment if you can get there. And
Speaker 1: this book Let Them really help me if you're relating
Speaker 1: to this at all, Like the book Let Them by
Speaker 1: Mel Robbins is really really helpful about freeople being mad
Speaker 1: at you.
Speaker 2: It's so freeing.
Speaker 3: Did you feel like you can't control not my circus,
Speaker 3: not my monkeys, You can't control what other people are
Speaker 3: thinking about you. You just have to go. You have
Speaker 3: to just be your best self. And if you're nice,
Speaker 3: you know, you're nice. And if someone decides you're not nice,
Speaker 3: like if they're you know, in a Brazilian church and
Speaker 3: they decide you're evil, yeah you're not.
Speaker 1: On you a part that and I'll finish by saying
Speaker 1: this and we'll go to break.
Speaker 2: But the thing that really resonated with me, that made.
Speaker 1: Me feel like, oh, I can't let this happen anymore,
Speaker 1: is that when you when someone's mad at you and
Speaker 1: you are obsessed about it and having anxiety about it,
Speaker 1: you have given your whole life to them. You are
Speaker 1: wasting your potential, your growth, your strength, Like you're wasting
Speaker 1: your life and you're just like giving it to someone else.
Speaker 1: Is that what the life you want to live is
Speaker 1: giving it to other people and you don't have an option.
Speaker 1: When you're trying to control how other people feel about you,
Speaker 1: you're giving your life to them. It's like they are
Speaker 1: dictating your mood. If they're happy with you, then you
Speaker 1: get to be happy with yourself. If they're mad at you,
Speaker 1: you're mad at yourself. So is that the life you
Speaker 1: want to live is if some person your boss or
Speaker 1: the girl who works in the cubicle next to you,
Speaker 1: or the girl you went to high school with who
Speaker 1: said something shitty on your Instagram, like you're letting her
Speaker 1: decide how your day is gonna be.
Speaker 3: What?
Speaker 1: Yeah, Like that kind of put it into focus for
Speaker 1: me of like I don't want. I'm not someone who's like,
Speaker 1: I choose my life and I live it how I'm
Speaker 1: gonna but like, at least I'm not gonna let people
Speaker 1: who truly don't matter in the scheme of things tell
Speaker 1: me how I'm gonna feel about myself.
Speaker 3: Final thought, you're at two M on Instagram.
Speaker 2: Now, oh now, baby am, you're in the.
Speaker 3: Two M club. Anything that you say can be construed
Speaker 3: and made into a headline that people will want to
Speaker 3: read because there's gonna there's you've reached that next level
Speaker 3: of fame.
Speaker 1: Well, yeah, Chris was saying to me, it makes sense
Speaker 1: why celebrities don't do interviews and they don't interact with
Speaker 1: people on social media, and they don't They just don't.
Speaker 1: They like kind of isolate themselves because everything they say
Speaker 1: or do can be used against them.
Speaker 3: There's a downside to it, Like if you don't do
Speaker 3: interviews for twenty years, then all of a sudden, you
Speaker 3: come out like Robert de Niro er in the election
Speaker 3: and start rambling about Joe Biden. Yeah.
Speaker 2: Yeah, it's like whoa, whoa, whoa.
Speaker 3: That's not good. But you can do it. There is
Speaker 3: a good way to do it, and That is my boy,
Speaker 3: Timothy Shallome, who does a million interviews. Yeah, he does
Speaker 3: shout outs. He's just deferential to everybody. There's no like there.
Speaker 3: He's not being honest. He wasn't he was being honest
Speaker 3: unless he is being honest, and that's.
Speaker 2: Yeah, I just can't be honest anymore.
Speaker 3: Yeah, if he was being honest, he's not gonna start
Speaker 3: shit talking anybody for any reason, because he's acutely aware
Speaker 3: of the Internet and how the Internet responds to everything
Speaker 3: he says.
Speaker 2: I thought you were saying he's a cutie.
Speaker 3: He is a cutie.
Speaker 2: He's a cutie ware.
Speaker 3: He's a cutie. I like what he wears, and he's
Speaker 3: great at interviews. Shout out tout. He's unknown, shout out, yeah, Hollywood.
Speaker 1: But then is that who I am? Is just being
Speaker 1: someone who's positive all the time about everything.
Speaker 2: And then yeah, because.
Speaker 3: You're a comedian and he's not.
Speaker 2: How good was Bill Burr on Jimmy Kimmel by.
Speaker 3: The way, Oh yeah, I watched that. That was great.
Speaker 3: I love I love whenever he just gives that dose
Speaker 3: of reality to a situation where it's like, what are
Speaker 3: we all doing here?
Speaker 2: And you think he.
Speaker 1: Might end up on the other side of things, you
Speaker 1: know what I'm saying, Like, there's so many comedians who
Speaker 1: have who go the other way, and he's still maintaining, like,
Speaker 1: remember this level of truth.
Speaker 3: He's from Boston, and Boston has just always been that way.
Speaker 3: It's like, these are a bunch of tough, working class
Speaker 3: guys and yet they're aligned with you know, the LA
Speaker 3: and New York City. It's like, what's going on here?
Speaker 1: I love in the last moment of that clip, it's
Speaker 1: on Kimmel right now and I posted on my story,
Speaker 1: But in the last moment of the clip, he was
Speaker 1: talking about screaming in his home or something and his
Speaker 1: daughter's like, Dad, it's just the toaster. And he goes.
Speaker 1: He goes, she goes, is this really about the toaster.
Speaker 1: He's like, it's not even that has nothing to do
Speaker 1: with the toaster. He's like, and she goes, what's it
Speaker 1: about or something? And he's like, you don't even want
Speaker 1: to know it was. It was just this like nice
Speaker 1: reference to like this undercurrent of trauma or whatever that
Speaker 1: has led him to react that way. It's like it
Speaker 1: just shows a lot of introspect section on his part
Speaker 1: that I think people don't anymore, but he's Yeah, the
Speaker 1: last ten years, he's kind of developed that sensibility. He
Speaker 1: did mushrooms an awakening, Yeah, dude, it's there's a crazy
Speaker 1: clip of him on Conan during COVID where he talks
Speaker 1: about a mushroom trip and how he's been angry all
Speaker 1: these ye and he never knew what it's like. And
Speaker 1: he's not even being funny, like Conan's waiting for a
Speaker 1: punchline and he's just like, yeah, just an angry guy,
Speaker 1: and uh, there's the last going on, you know, Like
Speaker 1: he's just like he's like, he's just talking about how
Speaker 1: he did mushrooms. He took too many. He had an
Speaker 1: epiphany that he's never dealt with. Like I'm kind of
Speaker 1: paraphrasing from I'm not remembering it right at all, but
Speaker 1: he's just saying that there's a lot that happened to
Speaker 1: him that he didn't process, and it's just turned into
Speaker 1: this anger and he's like calling himself out.
Speaker 2: And it's like he even calls himself.
Speaker 1: Out in the Kim I love someone that is so
Speaker 1: can seem so righteous and then all of a sudden goes.
Speaker 2: Like, ah, I was full of shit.
Speaker 1: I don't know what I'm talking about, Like, how great
Speaker 1: is that in someone? That is a wonderful quality for
Speaker 1: someone to be so positive, no, no, so certain that
Speaker 1: they're right, and then to be able to just completely
Speaker 1: undermine it all by being.
Speaker 2: Like, eh, I didn't realize how much helicopters were.
Speaker 1: I was an idiot, like he We famously know that
Speaker 1: he got his helicopter's license because he wanted to escape
Speaker 1: LA if shit ever went down.
Speaker 2: And then Kim Will goes, did you did you do it?
Speaker 2: Were you thinking about? He goes, I didn't know they
Speaker 2: was so fucking expensive. He's like, I didn't think about that,
Speaker 2: And it was just so nice to hear.
Speaker 3: And he didn't you have to make a Sophie's choice
Speaker 3: with one of his kids about who.
Speaker 2: He's great.
Speaker 1: I'm so grateful we have his voice, Like I was
Speaker 1: just watching that being like, fuck, yeah, he got it
Speaker 1: from what I from what I can tell, he seems
Speaker 1: to get it right, and it was just it's it's
Speaker 1: so nice to have him out there talking.
Speaker 2: I'm so I'm grateful for his voice.
Speaker 1: It feels like kind of a Carlin esque uh bullshit
Speaker 1: detector that.
Speaker 2: We need out there.
Speaker 1: Yeah, we need midst of everyone trying to seem do
Speaker 1: comedy and be cool, and I'll include myself, like, you know,
Speaker 1: there's to just keep it real.
Speaker 3: It's tough because I'm curious to see what the next
Speaker 3: generation of comics comes up with, because we need the
Speaker 3: counterculture to return. And right now, the most you know,
Speaker 3: all the comedians are kind of aligned with the people
Speaker 3: in charge, and so it's it's like we're not really
Speaker 3: getting the bullshit detector version of comedy right now.
Speaker 2: Yeah.
Speaker 1: Interesting, Yeah, all right, well I saw I saw a
Speaker 1: lot of it that in that interview, and I was heartened,
Speaker 1: to say the least. I was so excited to see
Speaker 1: that clip because it's like, and he was on a
Speaker 1: talk show being funny about the fires.
Speaker 2: Already, Yeah, there you go, and he had to evacuate.
Speaker 2: It was it was really nice to see.
Speaker 1: I turned down a talk show interview that was supposed
Speaker 1: to be tomorrow, No, yeah, tomorrow Friday to you guys,
Speaker 1: because I thought it was too soon to be funny
Speaker 1: and also I'm just tired.
Speaker 2: Yeah you deserve on TV again.
Speaker 1: I didn't feel like like going to a fitting and
Speaker 1: picking out an outfit.
Speaker 3: This is also the perfect time to take a step
Speaker 3: back and just let it all, you know, just let
Speaker 3: it all sink in, let it all marinate, and let
Speaker 3: people miss.
Speaker 2: Whisper to me in Plate's classes.
Speaker 3: Yeah, exactly, and let people miss the pre fire time
Speaker 3: when we were all innocent and happy and Nicki Glazer
Speaker 3: was crushing it at the Golden Globes.
Speaker 1: Yes, the last, the last thing that happened in Hollywood.
Speaker 3: Yeah, I think I have a reason.
Speaker 2: Critics Choice Awards and they get postponed again. We don't
Speaker 2: even know if they're gonna happen.
Speaker 3: Wow.
Speaker 1: Yeah, Grammys is happening though, and they're donating. I don't
Speaker 1: know that the Grammys made money, but I guess they're
Speaker 1: donating the proceeds of the Grammys, which I didn't know
Speaker 1: was a thing to the fires.
Speaker 3: Taylor Swift donated ten million dollars she.
Speaker 2: Did, Yeah, I didn't see that. Oh my god. Yeah,
Speaker 2: she's amazing. Beyonce did two point five.
Speaker 3: Yeah. I mean, it's great that there's a lot of
Speaker 3: people donating, and you should continue to donate. And Ali
Speaker 3: and I donated to the Pasadena Humane Society too yesterday.
Speaker 2: Really, Yes, that's good to do. I saw tell.
Speaker 3: Yeah, we want to donate to the animals.
Speaker 1: I know I do too. I want to say that yesterday,
Speaker 1: but like I do two and I feel bad. But
Speaker 1: you know what, you know, you can't you can't pick
Speaker 1: and choose what pulls at your heart strings.
Speaker 2: It all does.
Speaker 1: But for me, I'm just I'm into animals and I
Speaker 1: just and I've explained it before, because animals don't know
Speaker 1: what's going on, and that is what There's something about humans.
Speaker 1: I know that the human struggle is awful and there's
Speaker 1: maybe more suffering because they know what's going on. But
Speaker 1: for some reason, animals being like I'm scared and I
Speaker 1: don't know why is so much more heartbreaking to me.
Speaker 2: And just that makes me get out my wallet faster.
Speaker 1: And I'm sorry if that offends anyone, because I think
Speaker 1: sometimes people go like, oh, you can't shut up about veganism,
Speaker 1: but you haven't even mentioned this atrocity, and it's like,
Speaker 1: I can't help what gets me going? Yeah, and this
Speaker 1: is just let them be mad at me, Nikki, let
Speaker 1: them be.
Speaker 2: Mad, let them be mad, and then let me put
Speaker 2: my money towards things that I care about.
Speaker 1: So yeah, check out that book. Do we miss any
Speaker 1: other thing? I'm going on tour. It's crazy.
Speaker 2: I know it's crazy.
Speaker 1: I have like four shows in Denver, four shows in
Speaker 1: New York, four shows in Boston. Yeah, everything's selling like crazy.
Speaker 1: If you want to get tickets, I would get them
Speaker 1: very very soon. I think some shows just went on
Speaker 1: pre sale and they're already sold out since yesterday.
Speaker 2: It's it's nuts.
Speaker 1: I'm going to bring the heat for you guys, not
Speaker 1: too much, but I'm gonna I'm gonna bring you a
Speaker 1: wet heat.
Speaker 3: Yeah. You're not gonna set the world on fire, You're
Speaker 3: gonna no.
Speaker 1: But yeah, the door date's coming up our Minnesota and
Speaker 1: at the end of the month and then Atlantic but hey,
Speaker 1: yeah there's still tickets Atlantic, but still tickets in Atlanta City.
Speaker 3: Go to a different city, call the Godless Town and
Speaker 3: see if it works. What happens there, Yeah, are let's
Speaker 3: test it.
Speaker 2: But I like this country on fire.
Speaker 1: Yeah, figuratively and literally.
Speaker 2: All right, I'll try that.
Speaker 1: Uh, we'll see you out there and we'll te you
Speaker 1: next week on the podcast, Thank you for listening this
Speaker 1: week by Brian by Noah Don't be kidded Bye. The
Speaker 1: Nicki Glazer Podcast is a production by Will Ferrell's Big
Speaker 1: Money Players and iHeart podcasts created and hosted by me
Speaker 1: Nicki Glazer, co hosted by Brian Frangie, Executive produced by
Speaker 1: Will Ferrell, Hans Sonny and Noah Avior. Edited it engineered
Speaker 1: by Lean and Loaf, video production Mark Canton and music
Speaker 1: by Anya Marina. You can now watch full episodes of
Speaker 1: the Nicki Glazer podcast on YouTube, follow at Nicki Glazer
Speaker 1: pod and subscribe to our channel