WEBVTT - “I AM A TROUBLED DELIVERY MAN” 0:00:00.080 --> 0:00:01.240 Hello, Hello, can you hear me? 0:00:01.240 --> 0:00:01.440 Sir? 0:00:02.200 --> 0:00:03.440 Yes, sir? What is your name? 0:00:04.680 --> 0:00:07.640 My name is a sicklist sicklists? 0:00:07.640 --> 0:00:09.959 What kind of name is that? Is that Greek something? 0:00:11.080 --> 0:00:14.840 No, no, dude, it's it's a fucking name that my 0:00:14.960 --> 0:00:17.759 girl gave me because my real name is I mean, 0:00:18.800 --> 0:00:23.360 kind of put it together, I guess, you know, but yeah, 0:00:23.480 --> 0:00:26.439 it's my real name is Nicholas, but sounds kind of cool. 0:00:28.280 --> 0:00:33.040 Well, well, I sick. I'm gonna forget that. I'm just gonna, uh, 0:00:33.960 --> 0:00:34.880 can I call you Nick? 0:00:35.960 --> 0:00:37.360 Yeah? 0:00:37.200 --> 0:00:40.839 Here's the here's the thing in like, in my like 0:00:41.040 --> 0:00:46.640 I to me, ideally this podcast would be completely anonymous, 0:00:46.640 --> 0:00:48.640 and it pretty much is like if like, if it 0:00:48.640 --> 0:00:52.319 were up to me. You know, there's this podcast that's 0:00:52.360 --> 0:00:55.920 called Beautiful Stories from Anonymous People that this comedian Chris 0:00:55.960 --> 0:00:59.200 Gethard does, and you know, I mean I listened to 0:00:59.240 --> 0:01:02.920 that when I was in high school, and is you know, 0:01:03.000 --> 0:01:06.080 it is definitely an inspiration for this thing, and uh, 0:01:06.080 --> 0:01:08.280 for him, it is I don't think he even does names. 0:01:08.560 --> 0:01:09.920 And I want to do it like that because I 0:01:09.959 --> 0:01:14.720 forget everyone's name anyway, and ideally and ideally this should 0:01:14.760 --> 0:01:17.920 just be anonymous. So part of me is like I 0:01:17.920 --> 0:01:20.880 should just start instead of asking everyone what their name is, 0:01:20.959 --> 0:01:22.679 I should just give them a name. But then if 0:01:22.720 --> 0:01:25.840 I need to put like in conversation, I let Sometimes 0:01:26.360 --> 0:01:29.640 I like to address people by their names, and it's 0:01:29.640 --> 0:01:31.199 a pot you can't really do that if you're talking 0:01:31.240 --> 0:01:33.480 to an anonymous person, you could say you could you 0:01:33.480 --> 0:01:36.280 could be like like on Reddit when they're like, so, 0:01:36.640 --> 0:01:40.480 ann In, what do you tell me more? You know, 0:01:40.880 --> 0:01:43.240 I think that's weird. That's like lait speak or whatever. 0:01:43.440 --> 0:01:45.840 But I'm just gonna call you Nick is basically what 0:01:45.840 --> 0:01:47.560 I'm trying to say. 0:01:47.640 --> 0:01:50.480 Yeah, that's fine. You could call me like like. 0:01:50.840 --> 0:01:52.480 No, I don't want to do that at all. I 0:01:52.560 --> 0:01:54.800 really really don't want to call you that. What were 0:01:54.800 --> 0:01:55.360 you going to say? 0:01:57.320 --> 0:02:00.360 Yeah, No, Nick's fine, dude, that's totally cool. I'm down 0:02:00.360 --> 0:02:04.600 for that ship. Nick is a good name. But I 0:02:04.720 --> 0:02:09.400 called you. Did you read my text or no? Oh? 0:02:09.440 --> 0:02:13.760 So basically, I guess it's not like I guess it's 0:02:13.760 --> 0:02:17.120 basically I guess it gives like awareness to like like 0:02:17.200 --> 0:02:18.919 something that's going on in my company, and it's like 0:02:19.000 --> 0:02:26.240 kind of nationwide, like in the US. So I live 0:02:26.560 --> 0:02:29.440 in I live in a certain state where it's like 0:02:29.440 --> 0:02:34.680 hot as fuck, but it's it's kind of like deadly 0:02:34.800 --> 0:02:37.120 doing my job. And we work outside and so let 0:02:37.120 --> 0:02:39.520 me let me just start over. I work at a UPS. 0:02:39.520 --> 0:02:42.680 I'm a driver, right, and it's a lot of physical 0:02:42.680 --> 0:02:47.639 fucking work. The ship sucks, it's pretty horrible, but it's 0:02:47.639 --> 0:02:52.600 a good pay. A little bit ago, back in last August, 0:02:52.680 --> 0:02:57.560 we were planning to go on strike for for like 0:02:57.600 --> 0:02:59.680 a new contract. So every like three to four years, 0:02:59.720 --> 0:03:06.760 you had a contract with our union, Teamsters union. Basically, 0:03:07.800 --> 0:03:10.880 if we don't come to like a contract negotiations as UPS, 0:03:10.880 --> 0:03:14.560 there's we go on shrike. So one of the big 0:03:14.600 --> 0:03:18.560 caveats for last strike was we get air conditionings in 0:03:18.600 --> 0:03:22.400 a truck. And I don't know if you noticed, but 0:03:23.120 --> 0:03:24.760 whenever you get your package deliver or you see a 0:03:24.840 --> 0:03:27.000 UPS driver, there's no air conditioning in that bitch. 0:03:27.440 --> 0:03:29.680 Like, okay, So I never knew that. I never knew 0:03:29.680 --> 0:03:32.840 there was no air conditioning, But like, there's no correct 0:03:32.840 --> 0:03:34.880 if I'm wrong. There's no like fucking doors at the 0:03:34.960 --> 0:03:39.240 UPS truck either, right, So it's all it's open, how 0:03:39.360 --> 0:03:40.920 I guess. First of all, I didn't know that there 0:03:40.960 --> 0:03:43.080 was air conditioning that I didn't know that there wasn't 0:03:43.120 --> 0:03:46.120 air conditioning. But I guess if there were air conditioning, 0:03:46.160 --> 0:03:49.360 wouldn't it like I don't know how anything fucking works, 0:03:49.400 --> 0:03:51.880 but wouldn't the air conditioning like blow out from the 0:03:52.000 --> 0:03:53.280 open door? 0:03:54.200 --> 0:03:58.080 Right right? No, you're right. So actually they're sliding doors 0:03:58.600 --> 0:04:00.920 on the left and right, so you could close the 0:04:00.960 --> 0:04:02.800 doors and open them. But the reason why we always 0:04:02.800 --> 0:04:04.920 had the doors open because there is no air conditioning. 0:04:05.440 --> 0:04:07.760 That is like the air blowing through our trucks, that's 0:04:07.800 --> 0:04:08.800 our air condition. 0:04:08.600 --> 0:04:11.760 Oh so there is Okay, so there are doors, but 0:04:11.960 --> 0:04:13.840 you guys use them because as hot as fuck? 0:04:14.920 --> 0:04:15.200 Yeah? 0:04:15.240 --> 0:04:17.520 Absolutely, what do you guys do? Do you guys use 0:04:17.560 --> 0:04:19.360 those doors in the winter? I guess I can. I don't, 0:04:19.360 --> 0:04:21.760 I don't, I never. I don't know if I remember 0:04:21.800 --> 0:04:25.440 seeing a UPS truck in the winter. I don't know why. 0:04:25.680 --> 0:04:28.480 No, Yeah, yes, sir, we sorry, I call you start. 0:04:28.520 --> 0:04:32.960 It's just manners and stuff like that, So I apologize. 0:04:33.120 --> 0:04:35.279 I don't have to apologize for that. 0:04:35.839 --> 0:04:38.600 Go ahead, Yeah, I'm sorry. I also drink like a 0:04:38.640 --> 0:04:41.760 CBD like THAC like cycle frog right now, and that's 0:04:41.839 --> 0:04:45.040 just fucking starting to kick right now. So I'm trying 0:04:45.040 --> 0:04:50.400 to anyway, I'm sorry your question was again. 0:04:52.440 --> 0:04:54.600 You know what I I don't even remember. Go ahead, 0:04:54.600 --> 0:04:55.800 go ahead, though I feel like I didn't let you 0:04:55.839 --> 0:04:56.559 finish the whole. 0:04:56.839 --> 0:04:58.960 Oh but no, there is first sliding doors for the 0:04:59.000 --> 0:05:01.200 winter time and everything like that, and that's what we 0:05:01.320 --> 0:05:03.960 used to keep us f freezing our asses off. We 0:05:04.000 --> 0:05:06.760 do have good fucking eaters, I'll tell you that. But 0:05:06.800 --> 0:05:09.839 eventually everything breaks in the truck and it's it just 0:05:09.880 --> 0:05:12.720 goes down from here, dude. So yeah, it's just it's 0:05:12.760 --> 0:05:19.360 not good. But anyway, so basically we're fighting for air 0:05:19.360 --> 0:05:23.400 conditions in a truck. And then UPS kind of put 0:05:23.560 --> 0:05:26.200 like our pay salary on blast and letting ever know, 0:05:26.839 --> 0:05:28.880 letting like the public know how much money we make, 0:05:29.000 --> 0:05:31.520 and it's we do not make that much money. We 0:05:31.560 --> 0:05:34.039 make good money, but we don't make that fucking much 0:05:34.040 --> 0:05:36.400 money as they say we do. And they were kind of, 0:05:36.480 --> 0:05:38.440 I guess, use the public against us because we had 0:05:38.480 --> 0:05:42.640 everyone riding us for riding our back for the content 0:05:42.680 --> 0:05:45.760 negotiations because again, like you didn't know. I'm pretty sure 0:05:45.760 --> 0:05:49.279 everyone that's stream or chat doesn't know that Ups, we 0:05:49.279 --> 0:05:53.200 don't have air conditions in a truck anyway, Basically, what 0:05:53.200 --> 0:05:56.640 I'm trying to say is, so that happened, right, and 0:05:56.720 --> 0:05:59.800 so this previous years before that, we've had drivers like 0:06:00.000 --> 0:06:04.840 literally passed out and died like from heat dishaustion, heat stroke, 0:06:04.960 --> 0:06:08.080 and it never makes the news or anything like that. 0:06:08.920 --> 0:06:12.479 And it's actually pretty fucking sad. Recently a few months ago, actually, 0:06:12.480 --> 0:06:13.839 I've been trying to call you a lot about this 0:06:13.920 --> 0:06:17.960 when it was more frequent, but I mean, I know 0:06:17.960 --> 0:06:20.800 you got a lot of people on that bitch calling in, 0:06:20.960 --> 0:06:26.080 but yeah, recent people have died, you know, in our state, 0:06:26.120 --> 0:06:30.599 and it's been pretty shitty, and honestly, like UPS hasn't 0:06:30.640 --> 0:06:33.200 really done anything about it either. They haven't put it 0:06:33.240 --> 0:06:36.400 hasn't been made the news. There's like a small like 0:06:36.560 --> 0:06:39.880 Facebook group maybe about the guy that passed away in 0:06:39.880 --> 0:06:43.040 his funeral date, and I don't know, it's been really shitty. 0:06:43.040 --> 0:06:44.840 So I guess I'm just really calling to, like, I guess, 0:06:44.839 --> 0:06:48.080 spread awareness that, like, hey, you know, UPS, drivers still 0:06:48.080 --> 0:06:51.200 haven't gotten that fucking AC and honestly, I don't know, 0:06:51.240 --> 0:06:53.800 it's just like really fucking sad. What's going on right now? 0:06:53.839 --> 0:06:55.800 What's I guess with our people? 0:06:55.800 --> 0:06:58.479 And I guess this sounds like something that like John 0:06:58.560 --> 0:06:59.520 Oliver would cover. 0:07:01.880 --> 0:07:04.520 Oh, I can't get in contact with John Oliver. I guess. 0:07:05.920 --> 0:07:09.240 You'll you'll, yeah, you'll, you'll, you'll take me as a consolation. 0:07:10.440 --> 0:07:13.120 Yeah, yeah, you're your net stuff gig. But yeah, dude, 0:07:13.320 --> 0:07:14.840 that the shit that's going on right now. 0:07:15.040 --> 0:07:17.600 So so they Okay, when you said they tried to 0:07:17.680 --> 0:07:23.000 use their pay I gets you because I remember hearing 0:07:23.360 --> 0:07:27.960 something about like people were going on about like ups 0:07:28.080 --> 0:07:31.200 drivers were making a lot of money. Is that is 0:07:31.240 --> 0:07:32.640 that true? It is that like a thing that they 0:07:32.680 --> 0:07:35.200 tried to do to make you, like get people to 0:07:35.200 --> 0:07:36.000 support you less. 0:07:36.720 --> 0:07:40.120 I mean, like so, I mean there's like a at 0:07:40.120 --> 0:07:43.280 a top rate and if you're getting like forty plus 0:07:43.360 --> 0:07:47.480 hours working over time, and then it because our benefits 0:07:47.520 --> 0:07:50.400 are free, like we don't have to pay dental, eye care, 0:07:51.120 --> 0:07:53.400 you know, medical. Sorry, that's my cat right there. She 0:07:53.440 --> 0:07:57.360 wants to say hello. But I mean, if you calculate everything, 0:07:57.440 --> 0:07:59.600 how much money we say from that? I mean penically, yeah, 0:07:59.680 --> 0:07:59.960 I guess. 0:08:00.240 --> 0:08:02.400 But like, by the way, hold on, I just want you. 0:08:02.400 --> 0:08:04.080 I just put you in something. I can tell that 0:08:04.120 --> 0:08:07.440 you're being coy about this, and uh, just so you know, 0:08:07.560 --> 0:08:10.520 there's no number that you could that you could say 0:08:11.160 --> 0:08:13.400 where where I would be like, you know what, you 0:08:13.520 --> 0:08:15.760 make a lot of money, you actually deserve to pass 0:08:15.760 --> 0:08:19.400 out and die. Yeah, you know, so you don't have 0:08:19.400 --> 0:08:20.320 to be coy about it. 0:08:21.280 --> 0:08:25.040 Yeah, okay, I appreciate that. Thanks for letting me know. Yeah, sorry, 0:08:25.240 --> 0:08:29.040 because we always like anytime anyone talks about like friends 0:08:29.080 --> 0:08:31.320 of ups stuff, like they go to the news, there's 0:08:31.360 --> 0:08:34.839 retaliation and god forbid, there's retaliation. I'm pretty sure that 0:08:34.920 --> 0:08:37.120 of my supervisors, any of my bosses here the ship. 0:08:37.480 --> 0:08:41.720 Or retaliation against uh who like me, Like. 0:08:41.679 --> 0:08:45.600 Hey, you spread this information to the public. YadA, YadA, YadA. 0:08:45.640 --> 0:08:47.920 You know, it's like, well what if what information? 0:08:47.920 --> 0:08:51.040 What what misinformation are you being accused of spreading to 0:08:51.080 --> 0:08:51.520 the public? 0:08:52.040 --> 0:08:55.120 Oh, just like people are dying. Like they're gonna say like, oh, 0:08:55.240 --> 0:08:57.160 no one dies. It's like no, there's plenty of people 0:08:57.160 --> 0:08:59.960 that die. There's like several several drivers that die yearly 0:09:00.320 --> 0:09:03.600 on this shit. I don't know, I'm just being like paranoid, 0:09:03.600 --> 0:09:05.840 I guess, but I mean, I mean it's fine. 0:09:06.200 --> 0:09:07.560 Did you guys get the air conditioning? 0:09:08.400 --> 0:09:10.360 No, no, we still haven't gotten the air conditioning. That's 0:09:10.400 --> 0:09:12.720 what it is. If we had that air conditioning. That 0:09:12.800 --> 0:09:17.120 guy that passed away recently, like and along several other people, 0:09:18.200 --> 0:09:20.400 maybe that should wouldn't have happened, you know, they don't. 0:09:20.400 --> 0:09:22.360 They say they're gonna provide ice machines for us. We 0:09:22.360 --> 0:09:25.480 haven't gotten ice machines. We haven't gone coolers, we haven't 0:09:25.520 --> 0:09:28.640 gotten the air conditioning, we haven't got like, you know, 0:09:28.720 --> 0:09:32.440 events throughout the truck. You know, because like it's one 0:09:32.520 --> 0:09:34.480 hundred and five and it's like one hundred and twenty 0:09:34.520 --> 0:09:37.000 back in the truck. Dude, it's fucking brutal. Dude, it's 0:09:37.000 --> 0:09:41.160 fucking is fucking brutal work. And it's especially during COVID. Dude, 0:09:41.160 --> 0:09:43.600 we were like humping out a two hundred, two hundred 0:09:43.600 --> 0:09:47.160 and fifty stops easily, and then there's been several days 0:09:47.200 --> 0:09:49.360 that did three hundred stops and I don't know, we 0:09:49.400 --> 0:09:51.559 didn't really do anything. Our union can really do anything 0:09:51.640 --> 0:09:55.080 about that. Like demand it's more money because we're supposed 0:09:55.080 --> 0:09:58.800 to get hazard pay. But rumor of several rumors have 0:09:58.840 --> 0:10:03.520 gone around saying that like ups pocketed that fucking hazard 0:10:03.559 --> 0:10:04.600 pay from us. 0:10:05.559 --> 0:10:08.920 What what? What? What? What was the circumstance that you 0:10:08.920 --> 0:10:10.760 guys were getting hazard pay under. 0:10:11.400 --> 0:10:13.960 Because we're working as like essential workers during COVID like 0:10:13.960 --> 0:10:15.199 in twenty twelve, right, ye. 0:10:15.200 --> 0:10:17.760 Yeah, sure, sure, sure, Okay, So you guys were supposed to, 0:10:17.800 --> 0:10:20.439 like the government mandated, did you got like hazard. 0:10:20.200 --> 0:10:23.320 Pay right basically yes, yes, sir, And then. 0:10:23.200 --> 0:10:25.840 And the UPS was like, oh, we're gonna take that money. 0:10:26.760 --> 0:10:28.360 Yeah. I mean we didn't see a diamond d or 0:10:28.360 --> 0:10:29.960 like hey when we supposed to get hazard pay. And 0:10:30.000 --> 0:10:32.280 then everyone was in the dark about that shit until 0:10:32.320 --> 0:10:34.760 like twenty twenty two were we all found it and 0:10:34.800 --> 0:10:38.040 we're pissed. We were fucking furious. And then when a 0:10:38.080 --> 0:10:40.559 strike started coming getting to talk in twenty twenty three, 0:10:41.600 --> 0:10:43.600 that's when we're that's when we're all going to like 0:10:43.800 --> 0:10:46.280 strike and like you know, not going to work and like, 0:10:46.320 --> 0:10:49.280 you know, put her put our cricket signs up basically 0:10:49.920 --> 0:10:50.800 to good. 0:10:51.559 --> 0:10:53.800 Do you do you think UPS will come back and 0:10:53.840 --> 0:10:55.800 be like, okay, it's a no one on the air conditioning, 0:10:55.880 --> 0:11:00.720 but we're going to give every UPS driver one glass 0:11:00.880 --> 0:11:01.720 of lemonade. 0:11:05.280 --> 0:11:07.679 Honestly, they probably want to give us that. They'll tell 0:11:07.760 --> 0:11:09.079 us to fucking suck it up. 0:11:09.920 --> 0:11:13.240 So uh how well, so, uh are you like there's 0:11:13.240 --> 0:11:14.040 a union. 0:11:13.840 --> 0:11:19.240 Right, Yeah, we're unionized company, probably one of the last 0:11:19.280 --> 0:11:22.320 ones besides like nationwide, I guess, especially in tech. 0:11:22.520 --> 0:11:25.640 Do the wait do the other guys have like, uh, 0:11:25.720 --> 0:11:28.960 like the ups guys, do they go over the FedEx? 0:11:29.120 --> 0:11:30.880 Like are you ever like at a bar and you're 0:11:30.920 --> 0:11:33.360 talking to a FedEx guy and You're like, do you 0:11:33.400 --> 0:11:35.079 guys have air conditioning? Do you guys have any of 0:11:35.120 --> 0:11:37.199 the ship or is it just like the like up 0:11:37.480 --> 0:11:39.840 usps and FedEx and all those other guys. Do they 0:11:39.840 --> 0:11:42.959 have air conditioning or is well we're having you know. 0:11:44.120 --> 0:11:47.200 Well, Amazon drivers, they have their conditioning for sure, but 0:11:48.679 --> 0:11:50.880 I mean the Feedest people, it's kind of like the 0:11:50.920 --> 0:11:53.319 same thing. If they do have air conditioning the ship broke, 0:11:54.040 --> 0:11:56.240 they're like management is going to probably keep it broken, 0:11:56.880 --> 0:11:59.880 you know what I mean. And then like the post office, 0:12:00.000 --> 0:12:02.480 they have like those little vans that they drive in 0:12:02.600 --> 0:12:06.520 for the post office workers. And I've been told by 0:12:06.520 --> 0:12:08.040 a few of them because I'm work cool with them 0:12:08.080 --> 0:12:11.000 too as well, sort of that's naturally not really some 0:12:11.040 --> 0:12:12.840 of them are cool. Some of them are rolled dickheads 0:12:13.240 --> 0:12:15.840 on the post office people, but they have told me 0:12:15.840 --> 0:12:16.920 their air conditioning. 0:12:16.960 --> 0:12:19.920 Oh yeah, hold out way what's the can can you 0:12:20.000 --> 0:12:22.960 keep me in on a little bit of the UPS 0:12:23.280 --> 0:12:26.840 versus post Yeah, the UPS versus postal workers beef. I wouldn't. 0:12:26.880 --> 0:12:30.160 I would think that you guys had some solidarity. But 0:12:30.160 --> 0:12:33.240 what's there they like chat? Are they like chads or 0:12:33.280 --> 0:12:34.800 something like? Are they margined? 0:12:34.840 --> 0:12:35.000 No? 0:12:35.000 --> 0:12:37.520 No, no, no no no. If anything, we're the fucking chads 0:12:37.600 --> 0:12:40.400 and they're like the bitches. 0:12:40.520 --> 0:12:43.360 I guess well, by the way everyone everyone thinks that, 0:12:43.480 --> 0:12:45.480 you know, they're the chads and the other people are 0:12:45.520 --> 0:12:45.880 the pitches. 0:12:45.880 --> 0:12:48.480 But go ahead, Well, so they have a weak union, 0:12:49.679 --> 0:12:53.520 They don't get paid as much as we do. They 0:12:53.520 --> 0:12:57.040 are government workers, which is like really fucking good. We 0:12:57.160 --> 0:13:00.200 have to in contract with UPS, have to give them 0:13:00.240 --> 0:13:03.679 work like we had to give him, like work like 0:13:03.760 --> 0:13:06.520 smaller packages like let's say, like a small Sephora bots 0:13:06.640 --> 0:13:09.839 or something, or like a like a t move bots 0:13:09.880 --> 0:13:11.760 and shit like that. We have to give it to them. 0:13:11.840 --> 0:13:14.800 Under contrast, so they actually have work. So if anything, 0:13:14.800 --> 0:13:16.960 we're giving them work to do. 0:13:17.320 --> 0:13:21.040 Basically, have you just like met a bunch of have 0:13:21.120 --> 0:13:23.040 you just like met a bunch of UPS people that 0:13:23.080 --> 0:13:24.840 are like just I mean a UPS, Like, have you 0:13:24.920 --> 0:13:26.719 just met a bunch of postal worker people who are 0:13:26.760 --> 0:13:29.360 just like fix personality. 0:13:28.679 --> 0:13:31.600 Wise, Yeah, dude, there wasn't. Some guy he was like, hey, 0:13:31.679 --> 0:13:33.079 you know, you're just supposed to go over there and 0:13:33.080 --> 0:13:34.880 out of here. I'm like, well, fucking you do it, dude, 0:13:34.920 --> 0:13:37.520 I ain't doing that ship. Yeah, and he's like, broll 0:13:37.640 --> 0:13:39.360 you know, fuck you. And I was like, oh, go, 0:13:39.520 --> 0:13:41.400 fucking I don't give a ship, dude. I mean, you'll 0:13:41.880 --> 0:13:45.920 get your go, get your manager. We'll talk. And he's like, hey, 0:13:46.040 --> 0:13:47.640 he's kind of a dick. I'm like, yeah, I know, 0:13:48.000 --> 0:13:51.040 you get your man, get your fucking employee under wraps man. 0:13:51.440 --> 0:13:54.840 But most of them are pretty cool. But that one guy. Oh, 0:13:55.160 --> 0:13:58.440 I fucking hated that guy. I forgot his name. He 0:13:58.559 --> 0:14:01.600 was like a little dough boy that was really rude 0:14:01.600 --> 0:14:04.240 and mean, you know what I mean. So, I mean 0:14:04.320 --> 0:14:05.560 he was ashole to me. 0:14:06.120 --> 0:14:08.079 I like that. You know, during the pandemic, all these 0:14:08.120 --> 0:14:11.440 like advertisements would play and it was it was there's 0:14:11.480 --> 0:14:14.520 a strong sentiment of like, our nation's postal workers are, 0:14:15.400 --> 0:14:17.880 you know, the backbone of society, and you're just like 0:14:17.960 --> 0:14:21.160 that guy's they're a bunch of fucking doe boys. 0:14:21.240 --> 0:14:24.000 Fuck out of here. Nah, bro, it was UPS like 0:14:24.080 --> 0:14:29.840 fucking and and Amazon. I don't know, dude, but here's. 0:14:29.440 --> 0:14:30.760 What you have to use you to. Here's what you 0:14:30.800 --> 0:14:34.400 have to understand is I don't like I like, like 0:14:34.680 --> 0:14:38.560 us fat people who are ordering things on the internet 0:14:38.600 --> 0:14:41.400 and not leaving our house and using all your guys's services. 0:14:41.640 --> 0:14:48.000 I don't. I don't. I think the layman probably doesn't 0:14:48.320 --> 0:14:52.560 think that much about the difference between all of these entities. 0:14:53.040 --> 0:14:57.720 It's just like, we order a thing, a truck comes by, 0:14:58.040 --> 0:15:01.480 driven by some person, and they give us our thing. 0:15:01.520 --> 0:15:03.680 I don't think. I think the average person probably isn't 0:15:03.680 --> 0:15:07.840 thinking too much about like UPS versus USPS versus FedEx 0:15:07.920 --> 0:15:10.920 or whatever. They're just like, I want my stuff and 0:15:10.960 --> 0:15:13.240 it's cool that someone delivers it. I guess. 0:15:13.360 --> 0:15:13.680 I don't know. 0:15:13.680 --> 0:15:15.000 That might not be true, that might not be true. 0:15:15.040 --> 0:15:15.880 Maybe I'm projecting. 0:15:17.560 --> 0:15:20.240 I mean, I mean, it looks cool in the truck. 0:15:20.840 --> 0:15:23.960 I've known several dudes that said, bro, man like the 0:15:24.040 --> 0:15:26.480 fucking uniform does have to job meet with chicks. I'm like, 0:15:26.520 --> 0:15:28.200 what do you mean, like all brock out the ship's number. 0:15:28.240 --> 0:15:31.600 I'm like, wow, I never had that. 0:15:31.960 --> 0:15:34.960 Wait, wait, which what who did he work for? 0:15:35.760 --> 0:15:37.880 You know all ups drivers. I said, oh yeah, bro, 0:15:37.960 --> 0:15:40.160 this chick on route, Bro, you flirt with me. I'm like, 0:15:40.360 --> 0:15:43.040 oh really, like wait. 0:15:42.760 --> 0:15:46.400 Wait man, that's so that's fucking that's so awesome that 0:15:46.480 --> 0:15:49.840 you can get on rayah by being uh a postal worker. 0:15:50.480 --> 0:15:53.080 That's the coolest thing I've ever heard. That's incredible. 0:15:53.160 --> 0:15:57.920 Yeah. I've heard several stories of dudes and shapes on 0:15:58.080 --> 0:16:00.080 route and ship like that, and it's just like a 0:16:00.120 --> 0:16:06.000 whole damn oh my god. Yeah bro, I'm like, get 0:16:06.040 --> 0:16:11.080 the fuck out of here. I'm like, yeah, bro, anyway, yeah, well, well. 0:16:10.920 --> 0:16:14.200 A few things. I mean, it's it's a classic uh well, 0:16:14.360 --> 0:16:16.440 I mean not that porn in any way, shape or 0:16:16.480 --> 0:16:20.000 form mirrors real life, but it's a classic. It's a 0:16:20.040 --> 0:16:22.480 classic fucking porn thing. 0:16:22.880 --> 0:16:23.120 You know. 0:16:23.240 --> 0:16:25.160 Oh I gotta I don't even want to say it. 0:16:25.400 --> 0:16:29.640 But yeah. But but also, like here's the thing, here's 0:16:29.680 --> 0:16:32.960 the as I think I do. I have to assume 0:16:33.960 --> 0:16:37.600 there's something there's something like uh like I think it 0:16:37.760 --> 0:16:42.359 just in general, you know, uh, women are attracted just competence, 0:16:43.080 --> 0:16:48.800 you know what I mean, And there's something competent about 0:16:49.320 --> 0:16:51.800 being a postal worker. I got, I got like, there's 0:16:51.800 --> 0:16:55.560 something competent seeming ish, I guess about a guy in uniform, 0:16:55.640 --> 0:16:56.360 like it makes. 0:16:56.160 --> 0:16:59.600 Sense right now? And then I mean I have thought 0:16:59.600 --> 0:17:01.440 to some it's about that, and are like, oh yeah, 0:17:01.440 --> 0:17:03.280 we love him in a uniform. I'm like, oh wow, 0:17:03.320 --> 0:17:07.399 that's crazy. Also too, we bring joy to people like 0:17:07.760 --> 0:17:10.399 who isn't happy to see the UPS guy? You know, 0:17:10.560 --> 0:17:14.800 like you bought a new fucking you know, blow up 0:17:14.840 --> 0:17:17.640 doll and then like, oh shit, this guy has my package. 0:17:17.680 --> 0:17:20.040 Thank you. You know see what I'm saying, like it 0:17:20.080 --> 0:17:21.800 brings a lot of good joy to everybody else. 0:17:23.560 --> 0:17:26.800 Well, I'll say this, UPS, probably people are more happy 0:17:26.800 --> 0:17:32.119 to see you than the postal service, because, uh, mail 0:17:32.560 --> 0:17:35.399 can mean several bad things. It can mean bills, it 0:17:35.440 --> 0:17:39.600 can mean jury duty, it can mean scathing letters from 0:17:39.600 --> 0:17:44.000 a nemesis. But a package is usually always an exciting thing. 0:17:44.840 --> 0:17:47.880 Right, No, absolutely, I know you're right about that. Yeah, 0:17:47.920 --> 0:17:50.320 I mean someone could I could get like a like 0:17:50.359 --> 0:17:52.280 a child support letter, say hey you need pay more 0:17:52.320 --> 0:17:55.360 child support through the mail? Yeah, I know what you mean. 0:17:55.520 --> 0:17:58.040 You are you? Do you have a do you have 0:17:58.080 --> 0:17:59.440 a bastard child? 0:18:00.359 --> 0:18:02.720 I have a child, yes, indeed, yeah, we all do 0:18:02.800 --> 0:18:06.160 at GPS, all every guy there is mostly on child support. Dune. 0:18:06.240 --> 0:18:11.520 Yeah, are you what do you have a relationship with them? 0:18:11.920 --> 0:18:12.000 Oh? 0:18:12.000 --> 0:18:13.919 Of course, yeah, I put my stuff on child support. 0:18:13.960 --> 0:18:16.080 Fuck yeah, dude. Oh yeah that's good. 0:18:16.200 --> 0:18:16.680 That's good. 0:18:17.200 --> 0:18:17.680 Yeah. 0:18:19.160 --> 0:18:19.919 Well, how old is he? 0:18:21.280 --> 0:18:22.000 She's seven? 0:18:22.720 --> 0:18:24.600 She's seven? Does she think what you do is cool? 0:18:26.240 --> 0:18:27.680 Uh? 0:18:28.080 --> 0:18:31.240 I have driven by the house a few times and like, 0:18:31.400 --> 0:18:33.680 you know, showed her inside, and she's thinking, oh, it's 0:18:33.680 --> 0:18:37.560 pretty cool. And then she goes back and watching TV 0:18:37.720 --> 0:18:38.840 and or chilling you out. 0:18:39.760 --> 0:18:43.760 But she gohead, go ahead. 0:18:44.000 --> 0:18:45.760 She has seen me say hey, dad, I saw you 0:18:45.800 --> 0:18:48.359 in the truck. I'm like where She was like all 0:18:48.440 --> 0:18:51.399 right there at the stoplight, and I was like, oh, 0:18:51.440 --> 0:18:53.200 my goodness, you said have said hello to me. I 0:18:53.200 --> 0:18:55.760 would have loved to see you. You know. Yeah, I 0:18:55.840 --> 0:18:57.439 was waving at you and screaming at you, but you 0:18:57.440 --> 0:18:59.359 didn't hear me. I was like, oh, ship, that's like 0:18:59.400 --> 0:18:59.920 an asshole. 0:19:00.760 --> 0:19:04.760 That's cute. Now, Okay, so she yeah, so she she 0:19:06.000 --> 0:19:09.000 thinks your job is cool as much as I guess 0:19:09.000 --> 0:19:14.480 a seven year old can comprehend and think something is cool. 0:19:15.880 --> 0:19:16.160 Right. 0:19:16.680 --> 0:19:17.160 That's nice. 0:19:17.240 --> 0:19:19.359 Yeah, No, I mean there has been some There has 0:19:19.400 --> 0:19:20.919 been a few kids that are like want me like 0:19:20.960 --> 0:19:22.840 to they do a little trucker thing, Like, first of all, 0:19:22.880 --> 0:19:25.840 I can't do that. I only do do a honk. 0:19:26.400 --> 0:19:28.560 And you know, a kids like it. They'll always get 0:19:28.560 --> 0:19:31.959 weighed by people and stuff, you know, like older people, 0:19:32.800 --> 0:19:36.040 I mean families and stuff like that. You know, it's 0:19:36.119 --> 0:19:38.000 it's a cool gig. I do like it. It's just 0:19:38.400 --> 0:19:41.360 hot as fuck, that's it. I mean. 0:19:42.880 --> 0:19:46.520 So I guess, uh, what do you believe that you'll 0:19:46.520 --> 0:19:49.399 eventually get your your. 0:19:50.560 --> 0:19:54.880 Your air condition Yeah, so we did it. So yeah, 0:19:55.160 --> 0:19:58.760 originally we did agree last August, like a day or 0:19:58.760 --> 0:20:00.639 two before we were supposed to go on strike, that 0:20:01.400 --> 0:20:04.000 we would get the air conditionings. But the shitty thing is, 0:20:04.040 --> 0:20:05.399 and that's why I think our union is like a 0:20:05.440 --> 0:20:07.919 little week right now, because they gave them up to 0:20:07.960 --> 0:20:11.399 like four years or until the next contract to like 0:20:11.480 --> 0:20:14.679 come up with like you know, retrograde fit trucks with 0:20:14.760 --> 0:20:18.520 air conditionings basically, and we haven't gotten one single fucking 0:20:18.560 --> 0:20:23.200 truck with air conditioning. So I don't know. If they don't, 0:20:23.280 --> 0:20:26.199 then you just keep grieving about it, I guess, and 0:20:27.440 --> 0:20:30.720 bitch about it, and you know, bringing up in the 0:20:30.760 --> 0:20:34.000 next like contra negotiations and that one's gonna take a 0:20:34.040 --> 0:20:36.359 lot of news too, because it's like, oh, ups hasn't 0:20:36.400 --> 0:20:38.760 given any wonder. They haven't held up their end of 0:20:38.800 --> 0:20:39.840 the bargain, you know what I mean? 0:20:41.000 --> 0:20:41.240 Yeah? 0:20:41.359 --> 0:20:42.000 Yeah, I mean. 0:20:43.640 --> 0:20:46.160 What's the deal with your your kid's mom? Are you star? 0:20:46.160 --> 0:20:47.480 Are you cool with her? 0:20:47.960 --> 0:20:51.840 Oh? Yeah, I mean sort of. I mean we're cool, 0:20:51.880 --> 0:20:54.040 but we don't like talk or anything like that. We 0:20:54.119 --> 0:20:57.040 only talk whenever it's likely it's our our daughters like hey, 0:20:57.119 --> 0:21:00.760 you know, like okay, you know called, did y'all want 0:21:00.760 --> 0:21:02.760 to meet up here today? And stuff like that, or 0:21:02.760 --> 0:21:03.840 do y'all want to go your line? 0:21:03.920 --> 0:21:08.280 Right? Relationship, there's not you're not fighting, you're not there's 0:21:08.280 --> 0:21:09.360 no custody bat all. 0:21:10.119 --> 0:21:11.920 No, it's a little rough. I mean I'm also having 0:21:11.960 --> 0:21:15.240 like I mean, we're That's like another thing I probably 0:21:15.240 --> 0:21:16.680 want to talk to you about. It was just like 0:21:17.640 --> 0:21:19.919 about like my daughter and stuff like that. She's not 0:21:19.960 --> 0:21:22.000 having she's not having like the best time around me. 0:21:23.359 --> 0:21:27.640 And she was saying like, hey, dude, like I don't 0:21:27.640 --> 0:21:29.879 feel that comfortable around you. And as my seven year 0:21:29.920 --> 0:21:35.200 old daughter, I was like, oh, what is everything all right? Said? Yeah? 0:21:35.640 --> 0:21:35.680 What? 0:21:35.960 --> 0:21:38.879 Yeah, your daughter, your seven year old daughter said I 0:21:38.880 --> 0:21:40.080 don't feel comfortable around you. 0:21:40.760 --> 0:21:42.480 Yeah, she's I don't want to beat my dad anymore. 0:21:42.520 --> 0:21:45.680 And she's like that. I was like, wait, yeah, yeah, 0:21:45.720 --> 0:21:48.920 and so I'm just trying to figure out if I 0:21:48.960 --> 0:21:51.000 don't know at school or teaching her about boundaries and 0:21:51.000 --> 0:21:54.000 shit like that and all these extra things. Mean, boundaries 0:21:54.040 --> 0:21:55.879 are cool. I get that for kids, But like, you know, 0:21:55.920 --> 0:21:57.440 she's telling me, I don't really want to hang out 0:21:57.440 --> 0:21:58.680 with you. I don't really want to talk to you. 0:21:58.760 --> 0:22:00.040 And I was like, damn, bro. 0:22:00.280 --> 0:22:04.280 Like that's that's weird. Damn. Why why do you think 0:22:04.320 --> 0:22:05.840 she's saying that I would be mortified? 0:22:06.560 --> 0:22:08.439 I have no idea. I mean, I think because she's 0:22:08.520 --> 0:22:10.600 kind of confused about the whole situation because being that 0:22:10.680 --> 0:22:15.719 the co parent never were ever together, and she had 0:22:15.800 --> 0:22:17.879 kind of kept me away from my kid. Actually that 0:22:17.960 --> 0:22:19.320 kind of she like blocked my number and I had 0:22:19.320 --> 0:22:21.760 to play like telephone through her parents and stuff like that. 0:22:22.240 --> 0:22:24.480 Oh, there was there was like a like a whole 0:22:24.560 --> 0:22:26.560 ass like there was like a custody battle kind of thing. 0:22:26.800 --> 0:22:28.560 Oh yeah, I suit her, yeah, and then I put 0:22:28.600 --> 0:22:31.600 my challenge support Yeah absolutely. 0:22:31.280 --> 0:22:34.439 Okay, all right, but now but now you and you 0:22:34.480 --> 0:22:35.800 and her are like cordial. 0:22:36.880 --> 0:22:39.040 Yeah, I mean she's asking for more money and everything 0:22:39.080 --> 0:22:40.760 like that because we got to raise And I'm like, well, 0:22:40.800 --> 0:22:43.680 I mean like it's not really like because she was 0:22:43.720 --> 0:22:45.520 like yeah, you know, she'd have a choice and yeah 0:22:45.600 --> 0:22:49.480 yah yeaha. I'm like, oh yeah, so it's like a 0:22:49.480 --> 0:22:51.800 whole thing right now. It's kind of annoying, and I'm 0:22:51.880 --> 0:22:53.760 trying to see if I'm making the right decisions or not. 0:22:55.240 --> 0:22:57.639 That's it really, you know, I'm just taking care of 0:22:57.640 --> 0:23:02.840 my kid basically. I mean yeah, I mean she's she's 0:23:02.840 --> 0:23:05.159 a good kid. I paid my child's sport and I 0:23:05.280 --> 0:23:06.520 try to taught to her. I want to go to 0:23:06.520 --> 0:23:08.199 her school event she doesn't want me to go, and 0:23:08.240 --> 0:23:10.160 I'm like all right, then, well I just called in. 0:23:10.119 --> 0:23:13.000 For why does why doesn't she want you to go? 0:23:14.040 --> 0:23:16.560 I already asked a few people about this, and then 0:23:16.760 --> 0:23:18.480 people say, oh, you think the mom's saying she didn't 0:23:18.480 --> 0:23:20.680 Like I don't think that's her character though. I don't 0:23:20.680 --> 0:23:24.240 believe that, Like I could be just like stupid as 0:23:24.240 --> 0:23:26.679 hell and try to think the best of people, but 0:23:26.760 --> 0:23:29.200 I don't see that from her. She's always been like, hey, 0:23:29.840 --> 0:23:30.960 if you're going to say by to your dad and 0:23:31.000 --> 0:23:32.720 you say goodbye. You can't just hang up, you know, 0:23:32.840 --> 0:23:34.840 and like, hey, your dad's talking to you, you know, 0:23:35.040 --> 0:23:38.159 like you asked you a question, you know, or you know, 0:23:38.200 --> 0:23:40.119 stuff like that. So I don't think. I think my 0:23:40.240 --> 0:23:42.439 daughter just really just going through some shit. I don't know. 0:23:43.040 --> 0:23:45.480 She said she feels very anxious about like a lot 0:23:45.480 --> 0:23:50.720 of stuff, and she's she's saying, are you even my dad? 0:23:50.920 --> 0:23:53.280 And like are you even my mom? You know, she's 0:23:53.320 --> 0:23:56.320 kind of like trying to like she's not really understanding everything, 0:23:56.440 --> 0:23:59.600 and I don't know, it's just like a whole thing. 0:23:59.640 --> 0:24:01.800 I guess. I don't fucking know. It's rough. 0:24:03.440 --> 0:24:09.160 So like you think it's like it's so people you're 0:24:09.200 --> 0:24:12.760 like friends have been like like, oh, maybe the mom 0:24:12.880 --> 0:24:15.320 is like putting ideas in her head, but you're like, no, 0:24:15.400 --> 0:24:17.479 I don't. I don't think that's that's of her character. 0:24:18.359 --> 0:24:20.320 I don't think that's her. Yeah. I mean I think 0:24:20.359 --> 0:24:23.480 she understands, like, hey, Lucy needs a father. I'm glad 0:24:23.480 --> 0:24:26.920 you came back. I wish it was sooner. I'm like, oh, 0:24:26.960 --> 0:24:30.320 eat a dick. But I mean, I mean, like I 0:24:30.320 --> 0:24:31.880 had to do what I had to do and stuff 0:24:31.920 --> 0:24:33.679 like that. You know, I had to get to this 0:24:33.840 --> 0:24:37.920 ups position i'm at. It took a while, and that's 0:24:37.920 --> 0:24:41.120 why I'm there. Just that's the only reason why I'm there, 0:24:41.760 --> 0:24:43.280 you know, because it made good money. I'm able to 0:24:43.280 --> 0:24:46.480 put myself on child supports or my daughter, you know, 0:24:46.600 --> 0:24:50.320 live a decent life, because's life suspensive. And yeah. So, 0:24:50.920 --> 0:24:55.200 but what I'm trying to say is I don't think. 0:24:55.280 --> 0:24:57.359 I don't think that. I don't think she's telling her, 0:24:57.600 --> 0:24:59.960 you know, like, hey, you know, like you know, you're 0:25:00.040 --> 0:25:02.240 dad doesn't love he's not really your dad, he doesn't 0:25:02.280 --> 0:25:05.359 respect you. No, she's saying, hey, if you push your 0:25:05.400 --> 0:25:08.359 boundaries and you know, listen to her, like, this is 0:25:08.400 --> 0:25:10.960 what she's gonna remember. Nick. I just know that she's 0:25:11.040 --> 0:25:12.879 what she's gonna remember, and she's gonna remember, Oh, my 0:25:13.080 --> 0:25:15.960 dad doesn't give a fuck about me or has to 0:25:16.040 --> 0:25:18.720 hear what I have to say, you know, And yeah, 0:25:18.720 --> 0:25:20.520 I starts crying and everything like that. At least his 0:25:20.600 --> 0:25:21.639 daughter wants to say a low to me. 0:25:23.880 --> 0:25:27.240 But yeah, second, you have a second daughter. 0:25:28.000 --> 0:25:29.440 Oh it's my cat and that's my daughter. 0:25:29.440 --> 0:25:30.640 That's why I thought I thought you were talking about 0:25:30.680 --> 0:25:34.560 a dog or some shit. So I will I man. Well, 0:25:34.600 --> 0:25:36.199 I'm sorry to hear that. Man, it sounds like, uh, 0:25:37.760 --> 0:25:41.240 that sounds very difficult, but I get I would I 0:25:41.400 --> 0:25:46.280 would think that, Like if I would think that, like 0:25:46.480 --> 0:25:51.040 if at complete bare minimum you are like present in 0:25:51.119 --> 0:25:56.720 your child's life and you support them financially, uh, and 0:25:57.000 --> 0:26:01.520 you go try to be invested in their well being 0:26:01.680 --> 0:26:04.000 and in what they are doing in their life, like 0:26:04.240 --> 0:26:07.440 you know, just like being a fucking regular ass dad. 0:26:07.560 --> 0:26:12.600 I would I would think that, you know, they would 0:26:12.680 --> 0:26:14.359 they would not grow up to resent you. 0:26:16.119 --> 0:26:19.720 Yeah, she I mean like I I tell my girlfriend 0:26:20.040 --> 0:26:21.879 like or I tell them like I guess my other 0:26:21.960 --> 0:26:24.679 friends like give me rechars, like, well, you're putting your 0:26:24.720 --> 0:26:26.040 best be forward. Do you want to be there? Right 0:26:26.040 --> 0:26:27.560 I'm like yeah, I'm showing up. And then she just 0:26:27.600 --> 0:26:28.960 doesn't want to hang out as I'll come out of 0:26:29.000 --> 0:26:31.920 her room and you know, hang out with me because 0:26:32.000 --> 0:26:34.160 right now I have visitations. I've been doing the visitations. 0:26:34.240 --> 0:26:36.400 So because my daughter didn't know who I was until 0:26:36.440 --> 0:26:39.680 she was like three. Wow, So I wanted to Yeah, 0:26:39.680 --> 0:26:41.600 I wanted Yeah, I wanted to like gain it like 0:26:41.640 --> 0:26:45.200 a organic relationship with her, not for not like hey, 0:26:45.280 --> 0:26:48.240 I'm this stranger is taking you away. I was trying 0:26:48.280 --> 0:26:50.600 to build an organic relationship with her, and it took 0:26:50.640 --> 0:26:52.560 a while. It took a long It took like two 0:26:52.640 --> 0:26:54.320 years to where it to really get good, you know, 0:26:54.840 --> 0:26:57.560 like every week you know, every weekend, you know, just 0:26:57.680 --> 0:27:00.560 constantly just going over there, visiting her, play with her, 0:27:00.760 --> 0:27:03.840 going get on her level. And then right now I 0:27:04.000 --> 0:27:06.359 was planning to, like, you know, you know, try to 0:27:06.400 --> 0:27:08.119 take her for the weekend officially, just me and her 0:27:08.200 --> 0:27:10.639 and stuff like that. But this shit kind of sparked 0:27:10.720 --> 0:27:13.520 up a few months ago and it's kind of put 0:27:13.560 --> 0:27:16.439 a damper on my plans. And my lawyer's like, that's bullshit, bro, 0:27:16.560 --> 0:27:19.959 you need eline need to fucking just get the standard. Bro. 0:27:20.320 --> 0:27:22.679 You're paying all this fucking money, you know, you might 0:27:22.760 --> 0:27:25.160 as well. It's it's her mom putting things in her heads. 0:27:25.160 --> 0:27:27.480 I'm like, yeah, but I don't I know her. I 0:27:27.560 --> 0:27:30.320 don't I know her not enough to like not be 0:27:30.440 --> 0:27:33.560 a piece of shit mom, you know, because like her 0:27:33.720 --> 0:27:36.040 dad didn't have a father and stuff like that, and 0:27:36.240 --> 0:27:39.120 so she knows how important is to have a dad 0:27:39.200 --> 0:27:40.879 and everything like that. Basically that's what it is. 0:27:42.080 --> 0:27:45.200 So I will watch them, can I Well, by the way, 0:27:45.280 --> 0:27:48.560 you can you know you don't have to talk about anything, 0:27:48.560 --> 0:27:49.919 you know I talk about, But like, you, why did 0:27:50.000 --> 0:27:53.879 you only see her when she was three? 0:27:55.200 --> 0:27:58.040 Because my co parent she like kept me away from 0:27:58.920 --> 0:28:02.720 my daughter, like she blocked my number. I would try 0:28:02.760 --> 0:28:04.600 to go over and see her and it's like, hey, 0:28:04.640 --> 0:28:07.520 we're not there, and I will say, you know, fucking 0:28:07.640 --> 0:28:10.760 enough enough, I'm gonna be president my daughter's life. And 0:28:11.480 --> 0:28:14.520 that's why I suit her. And I mean the only 0:28:14.600 --> 0:28:16.240 time I was able to see her, it was like 0:28:16.960 --> 0:28:19.040 I couldn't talk to my co parent who had to 0:28:19.160 --> 0:28:21.720 I had to contact her dad and then we would 0:28:21.760 --> 0:28:24.360 have to talk, you know, back and forth, like hey, 0:28:24.440 --> 0:28:26.040 you know, does this day work? Yeah, We'll be here 0:28:26.080 --> 0:28:27.840 and I'll be there for like an hour or and 0:28:27.880 --> 0:28:30.480 they're like all right, well, well you know, better get going. 0:28:30.600 --> 0:28:32.639 I was like, all right, all right, cool, and then 0:28:33.240 --> 0:28:34.680 I got really tired of it. I was like, you 0:28:34.720 --> 0:28:36.000 know what, fuck this. I'm gonna be a part of 0:28:36.040 --> 0:28:38.000 my daughter's life. If I got to pay the money, 0:28:38.320 --> 0:28:40.560 because I had to pay like like eleven hundred dollars 0:28:40.560 --> 0:28:43.720 a month like for child support, and I'm like, fuck it, 0:28:43.760 --> 0:28:45.000 if I got to pay the money, I'll pay the 0:28:45.040 --> 0:28:48.120 fucking money, and you know, and now my daughter knows 0:28:48.160 --> 0:28:50.600 who I am, but now she doesn't want any part 0:28:50.640 --> 0:28:51.840 of me, and sometimes I. 0:28:54.080 --> 0:28:55.560 Yeah, so you're. 0:28:56.880 --> 0:28:56.920 So. 0:28:57.200 --> 0:29:04.960 So why why was your uh your ex keeping your 0:29:05.040 --> 0:29:07.280 daughter away from you for like for three years, like 0:29:07.400 --> 0:29:08.640 making making this difficult? 0:29:09.800 --> 0:29:12.960 I mean back in, I mean we were both young. 0:29:13.040 --> 0:29:15.360 We planned this child out. Was really stupid of us, 0:29:15.520 --> 0:29:19.360 and I cheated and I didn't. I know now I'm 0:29:19.480 --> 0:29:21.880 probably made it. I mean, it's not the most biggest 0:29:21.920 --> 0:29:25.120 mistake in my life, but it caused the riff where 0:29:25.960 --> 0:29:28.440 we're definitely not together and we're never gonna get back together, 0:29:29.360 --> 0:29:32.640 but we have a child together. And so she felt like, 0:29:32.800 --> 0:29:34.960 you know, I didn't like because I was still like 0:29:35.120 --> 0:29:37.480 very young. I didn't have like the ups money like 0:29:37.520 --> 0:29:39.880 I do now, so I couldn't provide a lot of 0:29:39.920 --> 0:29:43.080 things for her. And then she resented me for that, 0:29:43.360 --> 0:29:45.880 resented me because like she felt like I left her. 0:29:45.920 --> 0:29:47.960 I was like, I got kicked out of my parents' place. 0:29:48.040 --> 0:29:50.400 I mean, I'm living on my brother's couch right now. 0:29:50.480 --> 0:29:53.640 I have fucking nothing. I mean, my car's about the breakdown. 0:29:53.680 --> 0:29:56.400 I'm give me some time. And she just wasn't satisfied 0:29:56.400 --> 0:30:00.360 with that and just had a whole lot of resentment 0:30:00.400 --> 0:30:03.479 towards me. And then we try to do therapy. Therapist said, hey, bro, 0:30:03.840 --> 0:30:07.280 like she's a little too much and y'all are just 0:30:07.440 --> 0:30:09.120 arguing back and forth. I just can't work with y'all. 0:30:09.800 --> 0:30:12.880 And but basically, long story short, she kept me away 0:30:12.880 --> 0:30:16.120 from my daughter, and you know, I mean that's just 0:30:16.280 --> 0:30:18.160 she just had that resentment towards me from what I know, 0:30:18.480 --> 0:30:20.760 and she thinks she thought I wasn't like a good person. 0:30:20.840 --> 0:30:22.560 Back then, I'm like, I want to do my best, dude. 0:30:22.600 --> 0:30:25.680 I mean, I'll trying to navigate my life and make 0:30:25.720 --> 0:30:28.120 sure I made enough money to keep myself aflow first 0:30:28.280 --> 0:30:31.920 before I could help out somebody else. Then when I started, 0:30:32.200 --> 0:30:34.960 I made full time, I started making a lot of money, 0:30:35.040 --> 0:30:36.960 and then I was like, cool, I can make this happen. 0:30:37.040 --> 0:30:41.120 It was very consistent work, very consistent, and then I 0:30:42.520 --> 0:30:45.560 pulled the trigger to go sue her and then get 0:30:45.640 --> 0:30:47.440 my daughter or just to have her in my life, 0:30:47.480 --> 0:30:49.800 you know, put myself on child support. And it was 0:30:49.840 --> 0:30:52.840 like a six seven months like grueling process legally, and 0:30:53.080 --> 0:30:55.320 it was fucking horrible and probably one of the worst 0:30:55.360 --> 0:30:59.920 times of my life. And but but here I am now, 0:31:00.160 --> 0:31:02.040 you know, I mean, I don't know if to answer 0:31:02.080 --> 0:31:05.480 your question, I guess about why my baby mama was 0:31:05.600 --> 0:31:08.080 like so press on that keeping me around. You know, 0:31:08.360 --> 0:31:09.040 I just think she was. 0:31:11.120 --> 0:31:17.000 I'm sure, I mean, well, fuck, I don't know. It 0:31:17.120 --> 0:31:21.320 sounds to me like, uh, yeah, I guess if you 0:31:21.440 --> 0:31:25.480 I guess if you hadn't seen her, uh since until 0:31:25.520 --> 0:31:28.640 she was three, I can I don't know. I'm no 0:31:28.880 --> 0:31:31.160 fucking I don't know. I don't understand. I don't know. 0:31:32.040 --> 0:31:35.920 I'm no family psychologist or whatever. But I guess I 0:31:35.960 --> 0:31:41.200 can understand why she would be uh apprehensive. And yeah, 0:31:41.240 --> 0:31:42.960 the way you phrased it where you were like, I 0:31:43.040 --> 0:31:46.120 want to build a natural relationship, not just like take 0:31:46.200 --> 0:31:50.360 her and be like, you know, hey, I'm this new guy. Uh, 0:31:50.640 --> 0:31:55.440 because that's probably a crazy difficult integration to make after 0:31:55.560 --> 0:31:58.360 three years. But but I mean still I think, I mean, 0:31:58.480 --> 0:32:01.800 seven is seven. It's like nothing that's so young, you know. 0:32:01.840 --> 0:32:07.120 Another you know, you got eleven years until uh college already, 0:32:07.160 --> 0:32:09.200 yeah you got you got it sounds as though there 0:32:09.320 --> 0:32:16.800 was still time to invest yourself deeply in uh in 0:32:16.960 --> 0:32:20.160 this this this this kid's life to the degree that 0:32:20.320 --> 0:32:22.200 I want to to the to the to the to 0:32:22.280 --> 0:32:25.320 the level that you want to and we're previously unable 0:32:25.400 --> 0:32:29.040 to do. So, you know, hope, hope, hopefully you get 0:32:29.080 --> 0:32:30.080 that in your air conditioning. 0:32:31.320 --> 0:32:36.360 Yeah. No, no, no, yeah, you stupid. I'm over here 0:32:36.360 --> 0:32:40.440 in my fucking feelings. You bring up air conditioning. Ship. No, 0:32:40.560 --> 0:32:43.360 I appreciate that, man, I mean yeah, I mean that's 0:32:43.480 --> 0:32:44.960 where I'm at right now. I mean, I don't know. 0:32:45.640 --> 0:32:47.640 I have a meetium with my lawyer on Tuesday, and. 0:32:49.320 --> 0:32:51.880 You wait, wait, you're still you're still you're still fighting 0:32:52.000 --> 0:32:53.640 with this person. I thought everything was. 0:32:54.160 --> 0:32:57.400 Like because like it's like because our our our temporary 0:32:57.520 --> 0:33:00.960 order is coming up and we had to finalize something 0:33:01.120 --> 0:33:03.520 or the case gets thrown out, and basically all my 0:33:03.640 --> 0:33:05.240 hard work has been for nothing. 0:33:06.400 --> 0:33:09.720 So I don't, sorry, I don't, I don't understand. What's 0:33:09.760 --> 0:33:12.320 the what do you mean the case? What's the case. 0:33:12.960 --> 0:33:15.280 It's like it's a temporary order we had, like my 0:33:15.440 --> 0:33:18.240 daughter and the child support stuff. You know, it's basically 0:33:18.560 --> 0:33:20.960 it was a temporary order that we didn't finalize because 0:33:21.440 --> 0:33:26.440 everything was going pretty good until this year. And yeah, 0:33:26.560 --> 0:33:29.520 you know, I yeah, the plan was, you know, like 0:33:29.640 --> 0:33:32.680 to keep the temporary order as long as possible so 0:33:32.720 --> 0:33:35.880 we don't have to go through lawyers because fucking lawyers 0:33:35.880 --> 0:33:39.560 are expensive. Maybe we can wear something out, but yeah, 0:33:39.560 --> 0:33:41.120 I don't know. It just hasn't been going that way. 0:33:41.280 --> 0:33:44.520 And it's kind of I mean, you guys, are you 0:33:44.600 --> 0:33:47.080 guys not cordial enough that you that you just can't 0:33:47.480 --> 0:33:51.840 work out some kind of schedule independently. 0:33:54.400 --> 0:33:57.160 Well right now not. I can't have her by myself 0:33:57.200 --> 0:33:59.320 before she starts panicking in when in her mom and 0:33:59.360 --> 0:34:01.760 sh like that. It just freaking the fuck out, you 0:34:01.800 --> 0:34:06.000 know what I mean? Does that make sense? Yeah? I don't. 0:34:06.000 --> 0:34:07.240 I don't want to put her through that. I've seen 0:34:07.280 --> 0:34:12.120 her cry before and get like stressed out and like anxious, 0:34:12.160 --> 0:34:13.759 and it breaks my heart to see that ship. So 0:34:13.840 --> 0:34:16.000 I'm like, no, I know, I. 0:34:16.040 --> 0:34:18.320 Get I get I get you, and I you know, 0:34:18.440 --> 0:34:23.560 I respect that. I respect that you're like, uh, from 0:34:23.640 --> 0:34:30.160 my perspective at least you know, you know, the past. Notwithstanding, 0:34:30.360 --> 0:34:33.680 I'm just I'm like, you know, I think I'll say 0:34:33.680 --> 0:34:36.240 I appreciate it. It seems as though you're making decisions 0:34:36.320 --> 0:34:39.000 that are like best for the kid and not just 0:34:39.160 --> 0:34:42.239 like some ego of like, no, you are mine and 0:34:42.360 --> 0:34:44.279 you must spend this time with me. 0:34:44.760 --> 0:34:48.640 Yeah, so you know I respect that. I mean like, 0:34:48.840 --> 0:34:52.160 I mean that. I think that's I don't. I hate 0:34:52.200 --> 0:34:54.000 going over there. I hate, you know, just like I 0:34:54.080 --> 0:34:56.279 want to just have her at my place and ship 0:34:56.360 --> 0:35:00.560 like that. But whatever she's comfortable with. And I feel 0:35:00.600 --> 0:35:02.680 like I do low key feel like I'm failing my 0:35:02.840 --> 0:35:05.239 child if I don't take her though, And I feel 0:35:05.280 --> 0:35:07.520 like I'm like a gets like a bitch if I don't, 0:35:08.120 --> 0:35:10.320 you know, like retaliate or fight back on this, you know. 0:35:11.200 --> 0:35:13.040 But I think I don't know if I'm making the 0:35:13.080 --> 0:35:14.960 right decision. Basically, I don't know. I don't know. I 0:35:14.960 --> 0:35:16.640 don't I'm not looking at chat. I don't know with 0:35:17.280 --> 0:35:19.560 chat saying or anything like that. If you could give 0:35:19.640 --> 0:35:22.240 me some advice from chat, I appreciate it. Major's professor, 0:35:22.320 --> 0:35:22.680 you want it. 0:35:23.400 --> 0:35:26.759 Here's I'll tell you one thing, what you're going through 0:35:26.880 --> 0:35:29.680 is very difficult, uh, you know, with with custody of 0:35:29.760 --> 0:35:31.640 a child, and you know how to be in your 0:35:31.760 --> 0:35:32.400 child's life. 0:35:32.960 --> 0:35:33.080 Uh. 0:35:33.640 --> 0:35:36.359 And I definitely would not seek advice about it from 0:35:36.400 --> 0:35:41.080 a Twitch chat. That's probably the last place I would 0:35:41.080 --> 0:35:43.880 go for advice on your issue. I would talk to 0:35:44.000 --> 0:35:47.840 a therapist or a psychologist or a child person or 0:35:47.880 --> 0:35:51.320 a lie and I I will do you a service 0:35:52.040 --> 0:35:55.400 by not taking questions from the twitch chat on this 0:35:55.560 --> 0:35:57.200 difficult issue that you're going through. 0:35:57.840 --> 0:36:01.719 Oh no, I have I have a therapist. Yeah, okay, yeah, 0:36:01.760 --> 0:36:04.719 I mean mostly just to talk about the UPS shit. 0:36:05.160 --> 0:36:07.719 But I'm like, god, man, this motherfucker got me my feelings, man, 0:36:07.920 --> 0:36:09.960 God damn all right, cool, I'll talk fuck it. 0:36:10.920 --> 0:36:14.239 Well, uh well, listen, man, thanks for thanks for talk 0:36:14.400 --> 0:36:17.160 talking to us about ups. Thanks for sharing all this stuff. 0:36:17.200 --> 0:36:20.440 I don't know. Sometimes sometimes people because there's always gonna 0:36:20.440 --> 0:36:22.520 be there's always gonna be like some fucking dude in 0:36:22.600 --> 0:36:25.640 the YouTube comments who writes an essay. I read all 0:36:25.680 --> 0:36:28.200 the YouTube comments, by the way, it like, it makes me. 0:36:29.200 --> 0:36:31.560 It makes me happy when like there's people in the 0:36:31.600 --> 0:36:34.440 YouTube comments that are like, hey, man, dealt with the 0:36:34.480 --> 0:36:36.720 same thing blah blah blah blah blah. So they'll probably 0:36:36.760 --> 0:36:39.160 be some dude like that, and they'll also be someone 0:36:39.200 --> 0:36:42.240 who's mad at you and someone who I like whatever, 0:36:42.400 --> 0:36:46.719 you know, I don't know, I fucking don't know, but yeah, dude, 0:36:46.760 --> 0:36:49.359 thanks for thanks for sharing. Good luck on good luck 0:36:49.400 --> 0:36:53.560 on your on on all of your issues air conditioning 0:36:53.640 --> 0:36:57.279 and otherwise. There anything else you want to say to 0:36:57.400 --> 0:36:59.040 the people of the computer before we go. 0:37:03.040 --> 0:37:07.520 Fuck, I mean thank you. Not everyone is be kind 0:37:07.600 --> 0:37:11.080 to yourself, but be kind to others, I guess. And yeah, 0:37:11.120 --> 0:37:12.880 I hope everyone has to get rust of your day. Thanks, uh, 0:37:13.200 --> 0:37:16.000 thanks gag for a I'm a big fan. I appreciate 0:37:16.080 --> 0:37:17.919 you found on TikTok. You're the shit. 0:37:18.760 --> 0:37:24.480 Yeah, you have a good night, thanks man, good luck Bay. Yeah, 0:37:24.560 --> 0:37:27.520 that's tough. That's really really tough. I wish I wish 0:37:27.560 --> 0:37:29.320 I got how old that guy was, because I couldn't. 0:37:29.320 --> 0:37:32.000 He was probably he sounds like he was maybe I 0:37:32.040 --> 0:37:35.560 don't know. Sometimes people call him with like deep voices 0:37:35.680 --> 0:37:40.000 and they're, you know, nineteen or whatever. But he sounded 0:37:40.080 --> 0:37:46.080 like he was, uh maybe like at most thirty four. 0:37:47.080 --> 0:37:50.920 His kid was seven, so but I'm twenty six. He 0:37:50.960 --> 0:37:52.680 probably had that. I'm going to assume he had that 0:37:52.840 --> 0:37:57.719 kid when he was younger than me. And that's tough. 0:37:57.840 --> 0:38:02.160 That's a hard thing. Kids, This is it's a hard thing. 0:38:02.320 --> 0:38:04.200 I think I want I want to have kids one day, 0:38:04.239 --> 0:38:08.239 but I don't want to do it anytime remotely soon. 0:38:08.320 --> 0:38:12.960 I think probably not for another like ten or twelve years, 0:38:13.000 --> 0:38:14.480 because I don't want to. I don't want to have 0:38:14.560 --> 0:38:16.480 a kid and let in unless if I'm like a 0:38:16.680 --> 0:38:21.640 hundred I think back, like back in in previous generations 0:38:21.760 --> 0:38:25.360 up until like kind of recently, I think people just 0:38:25.520 --> 0:38:28.440 pop them out like it was just it was just 0:38:28.560 --> 0:38:31.880 what you did, right, And I think maybe in this 0:38:32.040 --> 0:38:35.480 generation people are being a little bit more like, hey, 0:38:35.600 --> 0:38:38.759 you know what, let me like make sure that I'm 0:38:39.760 --> 0:38:42.880 in a position to properly do this. Think about, like, 0:38:42.880 --> 0:38:45.279 am I with the right person to do this with? 0:38:45.840 --> 0:38:48.360 Am I do I have my finances in order to 0:38:48.520 --> 0:38:53.200 do this? And you know, I'm still eating Reesei's pieces 0:38:53.239 --> 0:38:54.839 for dinner, So I don't think I can take care 0:38:54.880 --> 0:38:58.680 of a child uh anytime? So am I saying that 0:38:58.760 --> 0:39:01.320 it's going to take me to twelve years to become 0:39:01.440 --> 0:39:04.200 the kind of person that doesn't eat recent pieces for dinner? 0:39:04.840 --> 0:39:08.640 I hope not. But it gives me a lot of 0:39:08.719 --> 0:39:13.960 comfort to have that much runway. I think that color's 0:39:14.040 --> 0:39:15.919 name was I think I gave him the name Nick. 0:39:16.080 --> 0:39:17.120 Thank you for calling Nick? 0:39:19.480 --> 0:39:19.600 Hi? 0:39:20.920 --> 0:39:22.640 Hi, what is your name? 0:39:24.160 --> 0:39:24.640 I'm Tizzy? 0:39:25.840 --> 0:39:34.799 Tizzy Tizzy uh with T I Z z Y. Yes, Well, 0:39:34.920 --> 0:39:36.800 what the hell is going on? Tizzy? How can I 0:39:36.880 --> 0:39:38.680 get you what you want to talk about? 0:39:41.560 --> 0:39:44.879 Yeah, that's that's a good question. Yeah, I was thinking 0:39:44.880 --> 0:39:47.839 about coming to see you in Pittsburgh, but I don't 0:39:47.840 --> 0:39:52.960 know if you still have tickets left or do I 0:39:53.040 --> 0:39:55.160 have a friend's kind of see you in Philly? Is 0:39:55.200 --> 0:39:55.760 really excited? 0:39:56.400 --> 0:39:58.000 Oh cool? Oh yeah, no I did. I did my 0:39:58.080 --> 0:40:02.320 Philly show U this week. Yeah, I'm playing at the 0:40:02.480 --> 0:40:05.919 Bottle Rocket, which I've heard is in Pittsburgh. I'm playing 0:40:05.960 --> 0:40:07.799 at this with a Bottle Rocket Social club. I've heard 0:40:07.800 --> 0:40:10.600 it's a cool venue. I'm very excited for that. So yeah, 0:40:10.600 --> 0:40:12.520 I help you come, but you know you can also 0:40:12.600 --> 0:40:15.080 you can also you can. You know there's a lot 0:40:15.120 --> 0:40:17.799 to do in Pittsburgh, so I wouldn't be surprised if 0:40:17.840 --> 0:40:22.440 you had other places and not really, So what's going on? 0:40:22.520 --> 0:40:22.640 Man? 0:40:22.640 --> 0:40:23.439 Would you want to talk about? 0:40:25.160 --> 0:40:28.360 I was what's the longest you've ever slept? Because yesterday 0:40:28.480 --> 0:40:31.600 I went to sleep at like twelve thirty am and 0:40:32.000 --> 0:40:36.120 I woke up at seven pm and I had a 0:40:36.160 --> 0:40:39.200 lot to do yesterday, and I kind of woke up 0:40:39.200 --> 0:40:41.920 and I looked at outside him I saw it was evening, 0:40:42.120 --> 0:40:46.640 and I said, you know there, yeah, I think I 0:40:46.719 --> 0:40:50.520 have I burned today, like there's nothing for me to do. 0:40:51.320 --> 0:40:51.640 I had. 0:40:53.000 --> 0:40:57.560 Yeah, No, I've done that. I've burned multiple days in 0:40:57.680 --> 0:41:01.440 a row sleeping, I saw. But but usually when I'm 0:41:01.520 --> 0:41:04.520 doing that, it's because I maybe had a few days 0:41:04.560 --> 0:41:08.399 in a row where I was staying up too late 0:41:09.000 --> 0:41:11.880 or something like that, or maybe I just like, well, 0:41:11.960 --> 0:41:13.840 like when I get really, really fucking depressed, all I 0:41:13.920 --> 0:41:16.239 want to do is sleep because it's sleep is cool. 0:41:16.280 --> 0:41:21.840 It's like dying without all the commitments. Okay, so I 0:41:22.080 --> 0:41:26.719 definitely I like doing that. Well are you did you 0:41:27.000 --> 0:41:29.120 just what do you do? You think there's a reason 0:41:29.200 --> 0:41:30.560 why you've been sleeping so much? 0:41:32.000 --> 0:41:32.120 Uh? 0:41:32.320 --> 0:41:35.840 Yeah, I have also been staying up pretty late, you know, smoking, 0:41:36.160 --> 0:41:39.839 not smoking, but like getting high. And you know, I'm 0:41:39.880 --> 0:41:44.279 I'm really depressed as well, so that definitely plays into it. 0:41:45.640 --> 0:41:47.520 Like I wake up a lot of times and I 0:41:47.600 --> 0:41:49.480 just lay in bed for an hour two hours? 0:41:50.120 --> 0:41:51.440 What do you just real quick, what do you mean 0:41:51.480 --> 0:41:54.160 by your smoke? You're not smoking, but you're getting high. 0:41:55.080 --> 0:41:57.120 Not you know, vaping edibles. 0:41:57.719 --> 0:42:04.080 Okay, yeah, how how old are you? If I may ask? 0:42:04.760 --> 0:42:09.400 I'm curious three. Okay, and so you're are you sleeping 0:42:09.440 --> 0:42:11.480 because you're by the way, I'm not I'm about to 0:42:12.160 --> 0:42:15.360 play armchair therapist, which I guess is my thing, but 0:42:15.960 --> 0:42:17.600 I'm just want to I just want to clarify that 0:42:17.640 --> 0:42:19.239 I'm not a real therapist because I'm about to go 0:42:19.400 --> 0:42:22.640 I'm about to go very therapist mode on this phone call. 0:42:22.800 --> 0:42:28.800 Yeah right, no, I yeah, I know why you Oh sorry, 0:42:29.560 --> 0:42:29.920 go ahead. 0:42:30.880 --> 0:42:31.239 Oh yeah. 0:42:31.239 --> 0:42:34.160 I listened to your podcast like probably every day. Like 0:42:34.239 --> 0:42:36.560 I think I'm I'm on the premium thing because I 0:42:36.640 --> 0:42:40.640 used to listen to you a lot, and like the 0:42:40.719 --> 0:42:42.799 ads started getting annoying some like, you know, I'll pay 0:42:42.840 --> 0:42:44.000 the whatever. 0:42:45.000 --> 0:42:47.040 Thanks, thanks for throwing a little thanks for throwing a 0:42:47.080 --> 0:42:52.960 little ad for for therapy Gecko premium uh in this call. 0:42:53.600 --> 0:42:56.359 But anyway, so why are you why? Like you are 0:42:57.000 --> 0:42:59.200 are you sleeping so much? Because you're depressed? 0:43:00.840 --> 0:43:04.200 Yeah, it's definitely has to do with it. I like, 0:43:04.360 --> 0:43:07.200 I'm on some medication, but it's uh, I don't know 0:43:07.239 --> 0:43:09.600 if it's working. I've been on it for like six months, 0:43:09.640 --> 0:43:13.279 and I think I'm gonna like ask my psych to 0:43:13.360 --> 0:43:15.439 cycle me or something like that put me on something 0:43:15.520 --> 0:43:20.480 new because it's just like every day it just feels 0:43:20.560 --> 0:43:23.640 like I have to do something distract myself, like play 0:43:24.600 --> 0:43:27.680 lots of video games or like you know, get high 0:43:27.719 --> 0:43:31.040 or drink or something, or like play games on my phone, 0:43:31.160 --> 0:43:33.960 watch YouTube like I used to. I used to have 0:43:34.040 --> 0:43:36.200 a really bad I mean I still technically I have 0:43:36.239 --> 0:43:40.040 a porn addiction, which you seem to get a lot 0:43:40.080 --> 0:43:41.319 of cold about on this show. 0:43:41.800 --> 0:43:43.399 Bro, do you want to hear Do you actually want 0:43:43.440 --> 0:43:44.920 to hear something completely insane? 0:43:45.239 --> 0:43:45.359 Uh? 0:43:45.920 --> 0:43:51.920 This, dude, I'll just tell you this. This morning I 0:43:52.440 --> 0:43:57.200 went on chat GPT and I was like, I think 0:43:57.480 --> 0:44:00.320 I don't I'm trying to pull it up. But this 0:44:00.640 --> 0:44:04.160 morning I went on chat GBT and I was like, 0:44:05.600 --> 0:44:09.880 I'm trying to quit weed, alcohol, sugar, and porn, but 0:44:11.080 --> 0:44:14.640 I use them to to get over anxiety and depression. 0:44:15.120 --> 0:44:19.320 How do I do that? So I I literally literally 0:44:19.440 --> 0:44:25.840 asked chat GBT how I personally could do that this morning? 0:44:26.160 --> 0:44:29.000 So I'm I'm I'm right, I'm right there with your brother. 0:44:30.160 --> 0:44:32.960 I've been thinking about this a lot because I've been 0:44:33.440 --> 0:44:39.600 like actually fairly depressed and miserable in my personal life. 0:44:41.520 --> 0:44:43.120 I might not seem like it in this very moment 0:44:43.200 --> 0:44:46.879 because because and this actually ties into what I my thing, 0:44:47.160 --> 0:44:48.759 I might not seem like it in this very moment 0:44:48.880 --> 0:44:52.400 because I am in the flow state of doing something 0:44:52.520 --> 0:44:57.640 that is actively taking my attention away from those things 0:44:59.560 --> 0:45:02.080 and read rectally get into something productive, which is talking 0:45:02.200 --> 0:45:07.719 to you and having making this podcast. And so I'm 0:45:07.800 --> 0:45:10.240 just I'm at a point for me where I'm like, uh, Okay, 0:45:11.640 --> 0:45:17.200 how do I fill my life with as much in 0:45:17.360 --> 0:45:22.520 the moment productive flow state things as humanly possible so 0:45:22.640 --> 0:45:27.719 that I'm not fucking destroying myself? And it's actually kind 0:45:27.800 --> 0:45:31.320 of a you know, it's a question I'm in the 0:45:31.480 --> 0:45:37.920 middle of answering on a macro level, but that kind 0:45:37.960 --> 0:45:40.439 of feels like it's the answer, right, is like, well, 0:45:41.080 --> 0:45:44.960 I'm doing all these negative behaviors because I get fucking 0:45:45.080 --> 0:45:50.520 anxious and depressed, and uh, it's like, well, how do 0:45:50.600 --> 0:45:55.200 I put myself in situations where I'm not feeling those 0:45:55.320 --> 0:46:00.120 things as much? I don't have the perfect answers to 0:46:00.200 --> 0:46:02.840 those questions, but those are the questions, you know. 0:46:03.160 --> 0:46:06.719 I think that might be a little like unrealistic. I think, like, 0:46:06.840 --> 0:46:08.799 you know, people talk about the flow state a lot 0:46:09.880 --> 0:46:12.480 these days, but I don't think your life can just 0:46:12.560 --> 0:46:15.960 be moving between states of flow all the time, Like 0:46:16.040 --> 0:46:18.440 there's gonna be you know, you're gonna be pooping at 0:46:18.480 --> 0:46:21.040 some point, you know, Like, yeah, I have a lot 0:46:21.080 --> 0:46:23.360 of dark thoughts when I'm pooping or like I'm in 0:46:23.400 --> 0:46:24.959 the shower and it's like that's not a flow state, 0:46:25.640 --> 0:46:28.320 and like or like I'm doing laundry or something like 0:46:28.520 --> 0:46:31.160 there's I feel like most of my life is not 0:46:31.800 --> 0:46:35.359 doing anything productive or or something meaningful, and I feel 0:46:35.400 --> 0:46:38.120 like I have to not want to kill myself during 0:46:38.200 --> 0:46:40.560 those times as well. Yeah, so I think it has 0:46:40.640 --> 0:46:43.640 to be more than just distracting myself, even if it's 0:46:43.760 --> 0:46:45.359 a in a meaningful way. 0:46:46.440 --> 0:46:50.439 Yes, I agree with you, Okay, not to keep talking 0:46:50.440 --> 0:46:52.120 about myself, but I'm gonna do it for a second. 0:46:53.800 --> 0:46:56.279 Like these like like I'm on tour right now, I'm 0:46:56.320 --> 0:47:00.279 doing these shows. And when I'm like on stage, you're 0:47:00.320 --> 0:47:02.400 doing the shows or touring or in an airplane or 0:47:02.440 --> 0:47:06.640 do like doing all this stuff. You know, I definitely 0:47:06.719 --> 0:47:09.040 like get depressed a little bit while I'm doing this stuff. 0:47:09.080 --> 0:47:10.960 But I have noticed I'm on a flow state. I 0:47:11.040 --> 0:47:14.560 am distracted. I'm doing something and I'm like, oh, this 0:47:14.760 --> 0:47:18.160 is great, but I'm also like, well, fuck, I can't 0:47:18.360 --> 0:47:22.840 literally be doing this one hundred percent of the time. 0:47:23.600 --> 0:47:27.040 As you've said, Yes, it's true, you can't just jump 0:47:27.160 --> 0:47:29.080 from flow state thing to flow state thing to flow 0:47:29.120 --> 0:47:32.160 state thing. Eventually you have to do laundry. Eventually, you 0:47:32.320 --> 0:47:35.920 have to be alone. Eventually, you have to do you 0:47:36.040 --> 0:47:42.680 have to live kind of boring life. Can't be this amazing, beautiful, exciting, active, 0:47:42.920 --> 0:47:46.719 productive thing one hundred percent of the time. You can. 0:47:47.040 --> 0:47:49.120 I think you can kind of get to a point 0:47:49.120 --> 0:47:54.000 where it's like that I don't even I don't want 0:47:54.040 --> 0:47:57.560 to say most of the time, but where you know, 0:47:57.840 --> 0:48:00.600 there's there's where those things are or I'll say this, 0:48:00.800 --> 0:48:02.520 you can get to a point where those things and 0:48:02.640 --> 0:48:06.520 those feelings are present in your life. But yes, it's true, 0:48:06.560 --> 0:48:07.920 you have to figure out how to not want to 0:48:07.960 --> 0:48:11.840 kill yourself while you're just sitting in a room doing nothing. 0:48:13.120 --> 0:48:16.320 So I agree with you on that. I don't have 0:48:16.400 --> 0:48:21.120 any I don't have strategies on not accomplishing that because 0:48:21.160 --> 0:48:24.160 I'm trying to figure it out myself. But I agree 0:48:24.200 --> 0:48:26.239 with you. I mean, what what works for you? 0:48:29.360 --> 0:48:32.800 You know it's something worth I definitely i'd write a 0:48:32.800 --> 0:48:36.160 book about it or something, but sure, Yeah, I'm in 0:48:36.280 --> 0:48:40.440 like a twelve step program for my addiction that's been helping. 0:48:41.280 --> 0:48:45.320 They talk about your higher power turning to them for 0:48:45.480 --> 0:48:48.520 guidance and stuff like that. I was never like religious 0:48:48.560 --> 0:48:50.800 growing up, so it's kind of difficult for me to 0:48:50.880 --> 0:48:55.280 do that, but I find it is like kind of helpful, 0:48:55.520 --> 0:48:59.279 you know, like talking to God asking God for help. 0:48:59.640 --> 0:49:02.680 I don't really understand what that is for me completely 0:49:03.800 --> 0:49:07.360 because I'm pretty new at this, and so that that 0:49:07.600 --> 0:49:10.360 that's an approach I've been trying. I've been trying. Also, 0:49:11.680 --> 0:49:14.320 there's this YouTuber named Sissyphis fifty five. I don't know 0:49:14.320 --> 0:49:18.680 if you've ever seen in the videos, but he he 0:49:18.719 --> 0:49:20.040 does like the stick Man videos. 0:49:21.600 --> 0:49:23.359 Okay, I think I've heard of this guy. 0:49:23.440 --> 0:49:27.520 Yeah yeah, so he Oh, that's actually not the guy's thinking, 0:49:27.600 --> 0:49:32.680 you know, casually explained. So that's the guy who does like, 0:49:33.800 --> 0:49:35.200 you know, how to tell if a girl likes you 0:49:35.280 --> 0:49:35.680 and stuff. 0:49:36.280 --> 0:49:37.279 Yeah, sure, I know what that is. 0:49:38.160 --> 0:49:41.880 Yeah. So he has an alternate channel called Jamie's Channel, 0:49:41.920 --> 0:49:45.800 and he uploaded this video about self realization and he 0:49:45.960 --> 0:49:49.800 talks about how like the idea, we have an idea 0:49:49.880 --> 0:49:53.560 of ourselves and so like I have an idea who 0:49:53.680 --> 0:49:56.880 Lyle the gecko is, and it's just like a bundle 0:49:56.920 --> 0:50:00.320 of symbols that I have, Like he's green and he 0:50:00.520 --> 0:50:05.600 talked to people on the phone. Yes, So I imagine 0:50:05.640 --> 0:50:07.920 that when other people I talk to talk to me, 0:50:08.040 --> 0:50:11.960 they have an image of me as well. So apparently 0:50:12.040 --> 0:50:15.600 most people confuse that image with who they really are, 0:50:16.280 --> 0:50:18.719 and that is the cause of most suffering in life, 0:50:19.520 --> 0:50:22.440 because like if someone insults you, for example, that's not 0:50:22.520 --> 0:50:24.680 really an attack on you, Like nothing about your experience 0:50:24.719 --> 0:50:30.239 has changed, but your belief about yourself has changed. And 0:50:30.360 --> 0:50:33.920 he says that you were able to completely disidentify with 0:50:34.000 --> 0:50:39.759 this illusion that you will stop suffering. It's really it's 0:50:39.800 --> 0:50:45.080 a really cool video essay. But I guess I'm like 0:50:45.200 --> 0:50:46.840 trying to I think about that all the time, and 0:50:46.880 --> 0:50:50.120 I'm trying to do it and incorporate it or achieve 0:50:50.239 --> 0:50:51.960 whatever realization he's talking about. 0:50:52.440 --> 0:50:57.920 But it seems like impossible to shake almost you what 0:50:58.360 --> 0:50:59.800 is this image that you're trying to shake? This is 0:50:59.840 --> 0:51:01.640 the image that you think other people have of you. 0:51:03.440 --> 0:51:05.920 It's not just like the image that I think other 0:51:06.000 --> 0:51:07.800 people have of me. It's like the image that I 0:51:07.960 --> 0:51:13.080 used to understand my own experience. Like like the example 0:51:13.120 --> 0:51:15.480 he used in the video is like a TV if 0:51:15.560 --> 0:51:17.560 it was to show it's like, okay, what am I like? 0:51:18.080 --> 0:51:20.200 It keeps showing images on the screen of what it's 0:51:20.360 --> 0:51:22.240 what it is, and shows like a picture of itself 0:51:22.360 --> 0:51:25.040 maybe and that's pretty like a pretty good depiction of 0:51:25.120 --> 0:51:27.360 what it is. But it's not it right because the 0:51:27.480 --> 0:51:30.279 TV is the screen. It can't actually display what it 0:51:30.400 --> 0:51:34.480 is on there. So it's like the image is whatever 0:51:34.560 --> 0:51:38.040 you think you are, but you literally can't think about 0:51:38.080 --> 0:51:41.920 yourself because you are yourself. So yeah, I guess the 0:51:42.000 --> 0:51:46.800 image is like anything that any ideas you have about yourself, 0:51:47.320 --> 0:51:50.800 like I am smart, I am a son or whatever, like, no, 0:51:50.960 --> 0:51:52.840 that's not you. That's just a symbol of you that 0:51:52.960 --> 0:51:54.400 you've identified with. 0:51:56.320 --> 0:52:03.600 Interesting, m I mean just this just thinking about the 0:52:03.800 --> 0:52:07.239 I guess there. I do believe that like there we 0:52:07.560 --> 0:52:14.120 form fucking like like we form narratives and stories about 0:52:14.160 --> 0:52:19.359 our self and about the universe that we believe are 0:52:19.440 --> 0:52:27.640 like reality, whereas like reality is this fucking amorphous, undefined 0:52:28.840 --> 0:52:36.520 thing that kind of lives in every single person's perception maybe, uh, 0:52:36.600 --> 0:52:39.400 And so in that way, it can kind of be 0:52:39.680 --> 0:52:43.480 whatever you want maybe, but if you, if you, if 0:52:43.520 --> 0:52:45.680 the stories you have about yourself and the narratives you 0:52:45.719 --> 0:52:50.279 have about yourself that you fucking suck, then you just 0:52:50.320 --> 0:52:55.560 canna make life bad. So yeah, I kind of agree. 0:52:56.040 --> 0:52:57.440 Get I get what you mean. I give what you mean? 0:52:57.960 --> 0:52:58.400 What do you can? 0:52:58.440 --> 0:52:58.719 I say? 0:52:58.760 --> 0:52:59.120 What do you do? 0:52:59.360 --> 0:53:01.760 It's like, what's your what's your what's your life? 0:53:01.920 --> 0:53:01.960 Like? 0:53:02.120 --> 0:53:03.799 Like, do you go to school, do you work? 0:53:04.400 --> 0:53:06.560 You talk to me? I'm a grad. I'm a grad student. 0:53:06.680 --> 0:53:11.600 I'm studying mechanical engineering. Okay, so I guess I talk 0:53:11.680 --> 0:53:16.319 to people. It's difficult, like because I'm living I grew 0:53:16.400 --> 0:53:18.960 up in New Jersey, Like all my friends and family 0:53:18.960 --> 0:53:22.760 and stuff are there, and I'm out here doing my masters, 0:53:22.840 --> 0:53:25.279 so I don't really have a good sport structure out here. 0:53:27.680 --> 0:53:30.400 So it's there are some days I go without like 0:53:30.440 --> 0:53:33.719 talking to anyone, which is pretty bad. I'm trying to 0:53:33.800 --> 0:53:36.840 change that, but it's what do you What do you 0:53:36.920 --> 0:53:40.880 do to try to change that? You know? I go 0:53:40.960 --> 0:53:43.520 to these twelve step meetings. I try to call people up. 0:53:44.600 --> 0:53:47.120 I try to hang out with people and message them 0:53:47.120 --> 0:53:49.880 and stuff to see if we can do something. But 0:53:50.160 --> 0:53:54.560 it's it's tough. I'm like kind of uh, really anxious 0:53:54.960 --> 0:53:57.560 about connecting with people. I guess. 0:54:01.920 --> 0:54:05.440 I mean I like the tall step stuff as a 0:54:05.760 --> 0:54:09.160 as a way of community. You said you listened to 0:54:09.160 --> 0:54:12.600 every episode of the podcast, right, yeah, yeah, did you 0:54:12.680 --> 0:54:14.880 listen to the one that I put out today? 0:54:16.840 --> 0:54:17.040 Yes? 0:54:18.120 --> 0:54:19.759 What did you hear the pinball Lady? 0:54:20.840 --> 0:54:21.040 Yeah? 0:54:21.160 --> 0:54:23.400 Yeah, yeah, I like the Pinball Lady. I think I've 0:54:23.440 --> 0:54:25.840 been thinking. I had that conversation yesterday, but I've been 0:54:25.880 --> 0:54:28.359 thinking about the pinball Lady. I liked her a lot 0:54:28.440 --> 0:54:33.320 because she just fucking went for it, you know what 0:54:33.440 --> 0:54:41.759 I mean. And I understand. I understand that, like, uh, 0:54:42.320 --> 0:54:47.000 for some some people are just wired differently to have 0:54:47.320 --> 0:54:50.960 more social anxiety, whether it's because of I don't know 0:54:51.000 --> 0:54:53.520 who their parents were, or experiences they had, or the 0:54:53.560 --> 0:54:56.400 brain chemistry whatever. I understand. I get that. I I 0:54:56.800 --> 0:55:00.279 you know, I empathize with that. But I I don't know. 0:55:00.280 --> 0:55:01.840 I thought. I think about the pinball Lady because she 0:55:01.920 --> 0:55:03.320 just fucking went for it. She was just like, I 0:55:03.360 --> 0:55:04.920 want to make friends, I want to have a community, 0:55:04.960 --> 0:55:08.520 I want to be around other people. Let me start 0:55:08.719 --> 0:55:11.080 throwing pinball tournaments. 0:55:11.960 --> 0:55:12.160 You know. 0:55:12.920 --> 0:55:17.000 She came up with a creative solution to her people problem. 0:55:17.760 --> 0:55:20.960 I was inspired by that on like a personal level. 0:55:23.000 --> 0:55:26.360 So I don't know. I don't know if if something 0:55:26.560 --> 0:55:29.200 like that. I'm not literally saying start a pinball tournament, 0:55:29.239 --> 0:55:31.640 but you go, what I mean, I don't know if 0:55:31.680 --> 0:55:34.960 something like that appeals to you, especially as a grad student. 0:55:35.000 --> 0:55:39.400 I mean, you're on a college campus. You're around a lot. 0:55:39.400 --> 0:55:41.279 I don't know if you're literally like but I don't 0:55:41.280 --> 0:55:44.279 know if you live on campus or whatever. But you know, 0:55:44.320 --> 0:55:45.960 if you're on a college campus, you're around a lot 0:55:45.960 --> 0:55:50.439 of people. The opportunities for you to socialize exist. And again, 0:55:50.480 --> 0:55:52.239 I don't know how you're wired or what makes you 0:55:52.440 --> 0:55:53.320 feel whatever. 0:55:53.239 --> 0:55:53.319 But. 0:55:55.840 --> 0:56:00.200 You just I just think it's likely for you to 0:56:00.280 --> 0:56:02.880 be happier if you're around more people. I mean, you 0:56:03.000 --> 0:56:05.160 just said yourself that you'll have many times where you're 0:56:05.239 --> 0:56:09.160 not around anyone. And that's just a recipe for for fucking. 0:56:10.000 --> 0:56:13.960 That's a recipe for porn. That's a strong recipe for 0:56:14.360 --> 0:56:18.719 sitting around all day, jacking off, getting high, drinking and 0:56:18.800 --> 0:56:24.600 eating candy. That's a that's really I have a one 0:56:24.640 --> 0:56:28.160 of my friends said to me that he loves going 0:56:28.239 --> 0:56:31.520 outside because he can't jack off. It's just it's one 0:56:31.520 --> 0:56:38.879 of the reasons. It's like an it's like accountability. It's well, yeah, 0:56:38.880 --> 0:56:43.239 I mean, ye, sure you can, but you're not. That's 0:56:43.400 --> 0:56:49.160 not gonna be it's against social contract. He's held accountable 0:56:49.239 --> 0:56:52.040 by social contract to not jack off. So he goes 0:56:52.080 --> 0:56:57.520 outside and or he and he goes in public and 0:56:57.640 --> 0:56:59.520 it's great. That's one of the great things about being 0:56:59.600 --> 0:57:02.720 in public is that you can't be a fucking crazy 0:57:02.840 --> 0:57:08.440 person that holds you accountable to that. So that's I 0:57:08.520 --> 0:57:11.319 guess that's my that's my that's that's my spiel. That's 0:57:11.320 --> 0:57:11.800 my spiel. 0:57:11.800 --> 0:57:14.040 Gotta go ahead, Yeah, this is this seems to like 0:57:14.080 --> 0:57:15.680 come up on your podcast a lot, you know, the 0:57:15.800 --> 0:57:18.320 adult film stuff. I think you had kazum Me on. 0:57:19.320 --> 0:57:21.600 You had a lot of girls seem to call in 0:57:21.720 --> 0:57:24.720 and ask about having an only fans, like starting an 0:57:24.720 --> 0:57:29.680 only fans for some reason, And yeah, it makes me 0:57:29.800 --> 0:57:32.640 think a lot. I thought, like I studied like some 0:57:33.120 --> 0:57:37.439 to like a feminist class and undergrad and like read 0:57:37.440 --> 0:57:42.000 about it sometimes and they're like talk about how it's 0:57:42.200 --> 0:57:46.200 coercive like the industry and stuff, and I think it's like, 0:57:47.160 --> 0:57:49.240 I'm not. I know, you don't give advice per se 0:57:49.280 --> 0:57:52.200 and but it's like, dude, girls are like, should I 0:57:52.200 --> 0:57:54.560 start an only fans? You're like, well, if you want to, 0:57:55.200 --> 0:57:59.720 But it's like, what what does it mean to want 0:58:00.080 --> 0:58:04.320 and do that? Like, especially if they're much younger, I 0:58:04.400 --> 0:58:06.040 feel like they don't know what they're getting into a 0:58:06.080 --> 0:58:09.640 lot of the times, because it's something very difficult to 0:58:09.640 --> 0:58:11.800 get out of, right if you go to go apply 0:58:11.880 --> 0:58:14.560 for a job or something that comes up, like maybe 0:58:15.360 --> 0:58:17.120 that's going to be something you're pigeon doled into the 0:58:17.200 --> 0:58:22.840 right for the rest of your life, and it seems 0:58:22.880 --> 0:58:25.280 like a little exploitative and stuff like that. I think 0:58:25.280 --> 0:58:25.920 about that a lot. 0:58:27.240 --> 0:58:29.240 Well, Well, the reason I say if you want to 0:58:29.440 --> 0:58:34.600 is because it's like it's I mean, that's what I is. 0:58:34.640 --> 0:58:37.080 If you want to, you know, I don't know. I 0:58:37.160 --> 0:58:42.200 don't like this is a pure matter of personal philosophy, 0:58:44.280 --> 0:58:48.040 Like I don't like porn and sex and like all 0:58:48.080 --> 0:58:51.400 these things, Like I don't. I think people are very 0:58:51.640 --> 0:58:54.560 very precious about it, and I think people have a 0:58:54.600 --> 0:59:00.760 lot of opinions about it. I personally, lie do not. 0:59:01.680 --> 0:59:05.880 I understand that society has a lot of like personal 0:59:06.080 --> 0:59:11.520 like moral whatever about like porn and sex, and it's 0:59:11.600 --> 0:59:15.760 taboo and whatever. Maybe it's just because I personally don't 0:59:15.960 --> 0:59:22.640 that I'm not as keyed into what society's views are 0:59:22.800 --> 0:59:27.280 of it. But I also I don't think that I 0:59:27.360 --> 0:59:29.680 don't know, I'm not a big fan of bending to 0:59:29.840 --> 0:59:33.680 society's judgments and wills, and so that's why I'm like, So, 0:59:33.760 --> 0:59:37.240 that's why I'm like, look, dude, you're you're an independent 0:59:37.400 --> 0:59:41.800 human being who can make who you know, like like that, 0:59:41.960 --> 0:59:43.560 like the girl on the Yeah, sure you're talking about 0:59:43.560 --> 0:59:45.880 that girl on the podcast. I think I even said 0:59:45.880 --> 0:59:48.480 the story. It's not like she thought about it and 0:59:48.600 --> 0:59:51.480 decided she trying to do it. Yeah, So what does 0:59:51.520 --> 0:59:53.840 it mean to want to do something? I don't know. 0:59:54.000 --> 0:59:59.200 That's that's too, that's too, I don't That's an interesting 0:59:59.320 --> 1:00:02.440 question that we could probably spend the next six hours 1:00:02.480 --> 1:00:08.840 talking about. But what's your name again, Sir Tizzy? Oh yeah, 1:00:09.320 --> 1:00:11.400 well Tizzy, it was good to talk to you. I 1:00:11.520 --> 1:00:12.040 hope that you. 1:00:13.520 --> 1:00:15.840 Oh yeah, I wasn't trying to tell you like you 1:00:15.840 --> 1:00:16.920 should have said that. 1:00:17.080 --> 1:00:18.760 No, I don't think. I don't. I don't. I don't 1:00:18.800 --> 1:00:23.520 think you were trying to do anything. Okay, Yeah, so no, 1:00:24.680 --> 1:00:27.920 I thought you were trying to talk to a gecko 1:00:28.040 --> 1:00:30.800 on the phone about stuff, which is what we successfully 1:00:30.840 --> 1:00:31.120 did do. 1:00:32.520 --> 1:00:36.160 Yeah, that's you know, that's the thing I think the 1:00:37.160 --> 1:00:40.080 lesson that I've learned the most reviews. You never judge anyone, 1:00:40.160 --> 1:00:43.360 it seems like when you talk to them, and something 1:00:43.400 --> 1:00:45.000 I've been trying to do in my life. 1:00:45.240 --> 1:00:49.080 But well, yeah, I think, I mean, I try to. 1:00:49.120 --> 1:00:52.080 I guess I do it sometimes, but only to be funny. 1:00:54.520 --> 1:00:57.240 I like that guy I kept driving his car down 1:00:57.280 --> 1:00:58.280 the mountain at night. 1:00:59.800 --> 1:01:02.440 Yeah yeah, oh well yeah, well that that was fucking stupid. 1:01:04.760 --> 1:01:07.240 I don't know. Well anyway, well listen, well, thanks thanks 1:01:07.320 --> 1:01:08.240 for listening to the show. 1:01:09.000 --> 1:01:09.120 Uh. 1:01:09.560 --> 1:01:11.680 I have a lot of these same problems, so I'm 1:01:11.680 --> 1:01:15.960 gonna also try to work on them and not I'm 1:01:16.000 --> 1:01:18.640 gonna also figure out how to how to you know, 1:01:19.040 --> 1:01:23.720 not do things that are you know, self destructive and uh, 1:01:24.360 --> 1:01:25.960 you know, maybe one day you and I will meet 1:01:26.000 --> 1:01:28.720 at the gates of Saint Peter and God will let 1:01:28.840 --> 1:01:31.080 us in and at that point we can just jack 1:01:31.200 --> 1:01:36.120 off as much as we want because we're dead. Yeah, 1:01:36.960 --> 1:01:38.040 is there anything else you want to say to the 1:01:38.040 --> 1:01:39.200 people of the computer before we go. 1:01:42.440 --> 1:01:44.480 Buy government buy us savings bonds. 1:01:48.800 --> 1:01:49.920 Yeah, all right, by Tizzy. 1:01:51.040 --> 1:01:51.720 No thanks. 1:01:53.880 --> 1:01:56.320 Let's see, should should you buy us savings bonds? I 1:01:56.440 --> 1:02:00.680 guess I don't know where to buy them or like 1:02:00.720 --> 1:02:02.080 how they were. I don't know how bonds were. I 1:02:02.160 --> 1:02:05.120 get how like stock like the SP five hundred works, whatever, 1:02:05.280 --> 1:02:09.960 I don't get how bonds work. That's it. That's my 1:02:10.080 --> 1:02:10.760 post call thought. 1:02:11.480 --> 1:02:14.960 Never Can goes on the line taking your phone calls 1:02:15.040 --> 1:02:17.880 every night. Never be Can goes to on his Ee, 1:02:17.960 --> 1:02:18.200 you're just 1:02:18.240 --> 1:02:20.560 Teaching you about in the mid of your life, but 1:02:20.760 --> 1:02:22.680 he's not really an expert.