Speaker 1: You're listening to Comedy Centralow.
Speaker 2: From the most trusted journalists at Comedy Central. It's America's
Speaker 2: only sorts for news. It's The Daily Joke with your
Speaker 2: host Daisy Lion.
Speaker 3: Welcome to the Honey Daily Show. I'm Dannie l Nick. We've
Speaker 3: got so much to talk about. Tonight, Kamala Harris faces
Speaker 3: the mcflurry of questions, Donald Trump declares war on furniture
Speaker 3: and Ray Let's get right into it with another installment
Speaker 3: of Indecision twenty twenty four. We are just forty days
Speaker 3: away from the election, which means it's time to start
Speaker 3: working on that insurrection body. Both Kamala Harris and Donald
Speaker 3: Trump gave campaign speeches on the economy today. Kamala laid
Speaker 3: out her priorities for the middle class, while Donald Trump
Speaker 3: promised to bring back North Carolina's manufacturing jobs and he
Speaker 3: wasn't dramatic about it at all.
Speaker 4: All of your furniture makers are going to come back
Speaker 4: and come back bigger and stronger and better than ever before.
Speaker 4: They're mostly gone. They're all coming back. This is why
Speaker 4: people in countries want to kill me.
Speaker 3: That's why people want to kill Trump. Does he think
Speaker 3: IKEA issued at fatwah on him. Fatois is my favorite
Speaker 3: ikea bookshop.
Speaker 5: Now.
Speaker 3: In her speech, Kamala was emphasizing her middle class roots,
Speaker 3: while in his speech, Trump was saying, nah ah, she never.
Speaker 4: Worked at McDonald's. It was a fake story. It was
Speaker 4: a fake story. She said she worked at McDonald's and
Speaker 4: she didn't. It was a lie. She never worked at McDonald's.
Speaker 4: Over the hot French fries, I think I'm going to
Speaker 4: a McDonald's in two weeks.
Speaker 5: Actually, did Trump.
Speaker 3: Just talk himself into getting hungry? She never worked over
Speaker 3: the piping hot fries, so crispy and salty, each bite
Speaker 3: of perfect. We should go to McDonald's. Let's go to McDonald's.
Speaker 5: Go so.
Speaker 3: Trump's new conspiracy theory is that Kamala Harris never worked
Speaker 3: at McDonald's when she was young, which to him is
Speaker 3: basically stolen valor. How dare you disrespect our men women
Speaker 3: in uniform. Those people served with honor and with extra
Speaker 3: ketchup packets if you asked. And yes, it is ridiculous
Speaker 3: that Trump is asking to see Kamala's burger certificate. This
Speaker 3: isn't the kind of thing you would lie about. It's
Speaker 3: not like sex with a porn star while your wife
Speaker 3: is pregnant. But look, I get why he's suspicious. If
Speaker 3: she had ever worked at any McDonald's between the years
Speaker 3: nineteen sixty and last week, he probably would have seen her.
Speaker 3: Or maybe this whole thing is just a ploy for
Speaker 3: him to get free food. You worked at McDonald's, prove it,
Speaker 3: make me seven big macs. But look, here's the thing.
Speaker 3: Trump and Kamala weren't supposed to be doing this stuff today.
Speaker 3: Originally there was another debate scheduled for tonight, and The
Speaker 3: Daily Show would be broadcasting live. But there was no debate,
Speaker 3: and we are not. In fact, if you're watching this
Speaker 3: right now, I'm already at home in bed, watching videos
Speaker 3: about how bad it is to look at your phone
Speaker 3: in bed. And now it's looking more and more likely
Speaker 3: that the first Trump Paris debate was also the last,
Speaker 3: because while Kamala keeps saying she's down for a rematch,
Speaker 3: Trump wants no part of it.
Speaker 4: The problem with another debate is that it's just too late.
Speaker 4: Voting has already started. It's too late to do another.
Speaker 4: I'd love to in many ways, but it's too late.
Speaker 4: The voting is cast.
Speaker 3: I'm sorry, it's too late. I'd love to have my
Speaker 3: ass handed to me for another two hours, but there's
Speaker 3: just no time. There's no time, there's no time. I
Speaker 3: can't I mean, I can't blame the guy. People don't
Speaker 3: typically volunteer for a second beat down. Drake's not going
Speaker 3: to Kendrick like, hey, we should beef again. Send me
Speaker 3: some date, get it on the calendar. But then again,
Speaker 3: there's only forty days until the election. There is no
Speaker 3: time to lose, which is why Trump is working overtime
Speaker 3: to make his final sales pitch. And it's not the
Speaker 3: one you think.
Speaker 4: Hello everyone, I have something incredible to share today. We
Speaker 4: are announcing the launch of Trump Coins, a true symbol
Speaker 4: of American greatness. Each coin comes with a certificate of
Speaker 4: authenticity with my signature to ensure you have purchased a
Speaker 4: real Trump Coin. I've seen a lot of coins out
Speaker 4: there using my very beautiful face and very beautiful guy.
Speaker 3: I'm only kidding, I'm only kidding. Apparently there are some
Speaker 3: lies even Trump can't stand by. But Trump is right.
Speaker 3: There are a lot of different trump coins floating around
Speaker 3: out there, and you don't want to be scammed by
Speaker 3: some grifter's fake coin. You want to be scammed by
Speaker 3: Donald Trump's fake coin. And that's why Trump's comes with
Speaker 3: the Certificate of Authenticity, which authentically certifies that you should
Speaker 3: not be in charge of your family's finances.
Speaker 6: That idea.
Speaker 3: Now, if he was just peddling this coin, I would understand,
Speaker 3: what with all the legal bills he has to pay
Speaker 3: for the fraud and the sexual assault and all the
Speaker 3: big max. But this is just the latest in a
Speaker 3: long line of John k He's been hawking all campaign season.
Speaker 4: My popular demand, I'm doing a new series of Trump
Speaker 4: digital trading cards. These cards show me dancing and even
Speaker 4: beholding some bitcoins. The launch of World Liberty Financial. We're
Speaker 4: embracing the future with crypto. I'm proud to endorse and
Speaker 4: encourage you to get this bible. Hello to my fellow Pakrits.
Speaker 4: We have some very big news. My new book Save
Speaker 4: America published by Winning Team Publishing. We're going to remember
Speaker 4: sneaker Con. That's the real deal. Each physical trading card
Speaker 4: has an authentic piece of my suit that I wore
Speaker 4: for the presidential debate. So they just came out with
Speaker 4: this T shirt which is really pretty spectacular and it's
Speaker 4: selling like hotcakes.
Speaker 3: Yeah, so Trump is selling a lot of stuff. And
Speaker 3: keep in mind this is all in the middle of
Speaker 3: a campaign season, isn't me? Or does it seem like
Speaker 3: maybe his true passion is this Like healthcare, he only
Speaker 3: has a concept of a plan, bible hawking, he has
Speaker 3: a whole warehouse ready to go. In fact, Donald, why
Speaker 3: don't you just do this? And you know, forget about
Speaker 3: the whole presidency thing. Dickon wasn't good at Trump at
Speaker 3: helps you can sell a commemorative coin from when you
Speaker 3: retired from politics. I'd buy that. Oh oh sorry, what
Speaker 3: was that?
Speaker 5: Oh?
Speaker 3: Trump just came out with a new product. Well let's
Speaker 3: see what it is.
Speaker 1: Hello, it's your favorite President, Donald J. Trump. Over the years,
Speaker 1: you've bought my coins, my shoes, pieces of my suit
Speaker 1: and it may be wonder is there anything you won't buy?
Speaker 1: Introducing Trump Spunk. I'm the first president in American history
Speaker 1: to train his own swamp into tiny little bottles, very tiny,
Speaker 1: and pass them on to you. The American people look
Speaker 1: at that. That's my snakes us Is it that fantastic?
Speaker 1: Each vial is personally hand cranked by yours truly the
Speaker 1: greatest American president? They say, my patriotics Floode is better
Speaker 1: than Lincoln's. I don't know the krem de la creme,
Speaker 1: I guess you could say, and now that cram can
Speaker 1: be yourse. You can use trump Spunk for anything, a
Speaker 1: charm on, a friendship bracelet, an incredible for your Easter hall,
Speaker 1: or the proposed to that special summer. You can add
Speaker 1: water and make your own Eric. I wouldn't recommend it,
Speaker 1: but you can. Every vial of Trump Spunk is guaranteed
Speaker 1: to be ninety percent of my Man Better. I don't
Speaker 1: know where the rest came from. And for a limited
Speaker 1: time only, each vial of my Tadpole yogurt is only
Speaker 1: twenty nine ninety nine. Act now and get a limited
Speaker 1: edition capsule of the J six Juice, which was created
Speaker 1: while I was watching the Capitol Riots. So wonderful Trump Spunk.
Speaker 1: It's worth a shot limit to per customer. I'm not
Speaker 1: a machine.
Speaker 3: Well that was gross. When we come back, Ray won't be.
Speaker 7: Joining me on the show, so don't go away.
Speaker 3: My guest Night is the singer songwriter whose debut album
Speaker 3: earned her a record breaking six BRIT Awards. Her new
Speaker 3: live concert album is called Live at Montro Jazz Festival.
Speaker 3: Please Welcome, Ray, Welcome to the show.
Speaker 5: Thank you so much for having me.
Speaker 8: I did a couple of style jumps just to get
Speaker 8: in the Vibesa main So from out.
Speaker 3: Bress a couple a couple start jump star jumps.
Speaker 5: Will you talk Jumping Jackson America?
Speaker 3: Right, So I am now calling them star jumps for
Speaker 3: the rest of my life. That's so much better than
Speaker 3: jumping jack Break do everything better. It's just the way
Speaker 3: it is. Congratulations on all of your success. You just
Speaker 3: swept the brit Awards with a record six awards, including
Speaker 3: Best Album.
Speaker 5: Thank you.
Speaker 6: How did that?
Speaker 3: How did that feel? What does that mean to you?
Speaker 5: Oh?
Speaker 8: Honestly, I think the night just got more and more
Speaker 8: blurry and more and more emotional as the night went on.
Speaker 8: I felt like by the last the album was the
Speaker 8: last one.
Speaker 5: It was a video and I just it's all blurry.
Speaker 5: But I've watched that.
Speaker 8: Yeah, and I got to bring my grandma on stage,
Speaker 8: which is the most beautiful moment.
Speaker 5: Yeah. Yeah, she's everything to me.
Speaker 3: Oh yeah, she was so proud of you.
Speaker 5: She is. Yeah, Yeah, that's incredible.
Speaker 3: The You know, Americans are completely obsessed with British artists.
Speaker 3: Charlie XCX, you Harry styles Adel Are you all impressed
Speaker 3: with Americans at all? You can be honest, be honest.
Speaker 5: I don't know what to say, fact that we love Americans.
Speaker 5: Come on, go Americans.
Speaker 3: We need to do more starjacks, star jucks. You come
Speaker 3: You mentioned your grandma. You come from a very musical family.
Speaker 3: Your sister is a singer, songwriter, your grandfather was a songwriter.
Speaker 3: You grew up singing in the church choir. How has
Speaker 3: all of that influenced you as a musician.
Speaker 5: I don't know.
Speaker 8: I think the thing with music is when it gets you,
Speaker 8: it really gets you, do you know what I mean?
Speaker 8: And I was so young when I just decided, like
Speaker 8: this was Plan A. There was no Plan B. I'm
Speaker 8: going to be a musician or die trying. So my
Speaker 8: entire life has just been that kind of you know,
Speaker 8: pursuit of music.
Speaker 5: And I started as a songwriter.
Speaker 8: It's kind of got my foot in the door, you know,
Speaker 8: and it's it's been, Yeah, it's been. It's not the
Speaker 8: simplest journey behind the scenes, you know what I mean?
Speaker 8: I know you hear, yeah, sure, but we made it
Speaker 8: so far, so good. I've got big dreams, big plans.
Speaker 5: I'm heading there, so far, so good.
Speaker 3: Did you started out as a songwriter? You wrote songs
Speaker 3: for Beyonce, for John Legend, for Kylie Minogue? How was
Speaker 3: it last year you put out independently your solo album.
Speaker 3: How how did that feel to do that and what
Speaker 3: was the music writing process like for you writing for
Speaker 3: yourself versus another artist?
Speaker 1: Oh?
Speaker 5: I do you know? It was such a liberating thing.
Speaker 8: And you know, I've been in a record label for
Speaker 8: quite a while and it was a tricky time. And
Speaker 8: for me, albums and everything, you know, I do think
Speaker 8: everything's becoming a lot shorter now. All of our attention spans,
Speaker 8: including myself, is just getting short and shorter. But for me,
Speaker 8: albums are just essential and important and will never die.
Speaker 5: And I really believe in the album.
Speaker 8: So getting to make my own one was a really
Speaker 8: beautiful experience. And then on top of that, getting to
Speaker 8: be recognized and listened to. But that it's just opened
Speaker 8: so many doors. It's just blown my mind. A lot
Speaker 8: of people thought that I would never have success as
Speaker 8: an artist. I mean, so it's just also so vindicating
Speaker 8: to be able to prove to myself that they were
Speaker 8: just all chatting rubbish. Yeah, you have any laugh things.
Speaker 3: One of the things that I appreciate so much about
Speaker 3: your music and that I think sets you apart from
Speaker 3: so many other artists is the way that you juxtapose
Speaker 3: these big, sort of joyful, big band jazzy music along
Speaker 3: with lyrics that are really raw and vulnerable and about
Speaker 3: very serious issues. You talk about body dysmorphia, you talk
Speaker 3: about mental health, sexual assault. How do you even begin
Speaker 3: building music around those lyrics?
Speaker 8: Well, you know, I do think. I think music is medicine.
Speaker 8: I will say that. I think I think like even
Speaker 8: sitting here and talking to about these sort of heavier subjects,
Speaker 8: I get nervous. I don't really know how to address
Speaker 8: it or what to say. And I think music is
Speaker 8: a safe space to kind of be raw and honest.
Speaker 8: And for me, that's my safe place. It's my therapy.
Speaker 8: And yeah, you know, I think there's a lot of
Speaker 8: us have really broken and a lot of us are hurting,
Speaker 8: and a lot of us are dealing with things we
Speaker 8: don't know exactly how to speak about or express even
Speaker 8: with the people that we love, and I think music
Speaker 8: is a safe space to do that, to find healing
Speaker 8: or talk about it or just I don't know, process it,
Speaker 8: So that was really important to me as an independent artist.
Speaker 8: I just wanted to be honest about those things you're
Speaker 8: quiet about.
Speaker 3: You know, you've talked a lot about imposture, syndrome experiencing that.
Speaker 3: Is that something that you still think about even with
Speaker 3: this amount of success that you've reached.
Speaker 5: Oh yeah, I just feel yeah, do you know what?
Speaker 8: I'm just more of a like, you know, just I'm
Speaker 8: quite chatty and just like hang out, do you know
Speaker 8: what I mean? And then you know, you get put
Speaker 8: in these kind of fancy environments like the met Gala,
Speaker 8: for instance, I was just like, what am.
Speaker 5: I doing here? You know?
Speaker 8: So I guess you do kind of feel like that,
Speaker 8: And I don't necessarily think I feel like that's a
Speaker 8: bad thing. I think the kind of music I want
Speaker 8: to continue to create, the person I always want to
Speaker 8: be is someone who's just like, you know what I mean?
Speaker 5: Normal?
Speaker 8: I don't know, And I'm not going to be fancy
Speaker 8: the way I suck at being fancy, even though this
Speaker 8: dresses is very fancy.
Speaker 3: But I mean, you got it your song genesis, and
Speaker 3: within that you explore all of these different topics. You
Speaker 3: talk a lot about the dangers of social media, mental health, anxiety.
Speaker 3: You explore all these weighty topics. What was so important
Speaker 3: to you about covering all of those themes in this
Speaker 3: one song.
Speaker 8: Well, I don't know, Like I was kind of saying before,
Speaker 8: I feel like it's easy to kind of brush over
Speaker 8: and gloss over the truth and for us to all
Speaker 8: be you know, we're.
Speaker 5: All kind of stuck in these algorithms and it's all like.
Speaker 8: Self love, self love and everything's and everything's fine, and say, oh,
Speaker 8: and it's just not the reality at all. I've spent
Speaker 8: like five minutes on social media, my head starts to
Speaker 8: spin out. I've actually had to come off it completely.
Speaker 8: I made them change my past, where as I can't
Speaker 8: even look in. So someone hands me my phone. It's like,
Speaker 8: you've got four minutes, and I'm like, great, and I
Speaker 8: need that, you know what I mean, because it's really
Speaker 8: bad for me and I can't be the only one
Speaker 8: who feels that way. That's brilliant. So yeah, I wanted
Speaker 8: to make a song. It's a seven minute long song.
Speaker 8: I'm sorry, I'm only doing the really sad parts actually
Speaker 8: on here.
Speaker 3: That works for us.
Speaker 8: We're very sad, So it's going to be quite depressing.
Speaker 8: You know, it starts sad, it gets quite angry, and
Speaker 8: then it goes lying.
Speaker 5: I don't know.
Speaker 8: It's just art music and it's honest. It was tough
Speaker 8: to write. It's very raw. But I'm proud of it,
Speaker 8: you know, and that's what matters most. I think, Yeah,
Speaker 8: you have a lot to be proud of, so you
Speaker 8: should be very proud of yourself.
Speaker 3: And we are proud to have you here at this show.
Speaker 3: So thank you so much for coming on Live at
Speaker 3: Manto Jazz Festival is available now. That's our show for tonight.
Speaker 3: But before we go this election season, we are working
Speaker 3: with headcount to make sure that you and your friends
Speaker 3: are good to vote. Had to vote vote vote dot
Speaker 3: com to make sure that you're ready to vote this November.
Speaker 3: Now here it is your moment of zen. But what
Speaker 3: about Kamalos specifics.
Speaker 6: People like to have a connection to whoever is Ronnie
Speaker 6: fag is that they share their experience, that they understand
Speaker 6: their lives, and I think that's what she is establishing.
Speaker 3: Bite a second, she actually said her policy is a
Speaker 3: connection joining us Now. Florida Congresswoman Anna Paulina Alona Congressman,
Speaker 3: great to see you tonight.
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