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Speaker 1: It is time now for today's Strawberry Letter.

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Speaker 2: And if you need advice on relationships, on work, on sex, parenting,

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Speaker 2: and more, please submit your Strawberry Letter to STEVEVARBFM dot

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Speaker 2: com and click.

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Speaker 1: Submit Strawberry Letter.

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Speaker 2: That's all you have to do, and we could be

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Speaker 2: reading your letter live on the air, just like we're

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Speaker 2: going to read this one right here.

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Speaker 1: Right now. You never know, it could be yours.

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Speaker 3: It could be yours. Buckle up and hold on tight.

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Speaker 3: We got it for you. Here it is Strawberry Letter.

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Speaker 1: All right, thank you, nephew. Subject. I can't do that often.

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Speaker 2: I think this letter deserves a disclaimer, so if you

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Speaker 2: have young kids in the car, you might not want

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Speaker 2: them to hear this.

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Speaker 1: Here we go. Dear Stephen Shirley.

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Speaker 2: I'm twenty eight years old and I'm dating a really

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Speaker 2: nice forty year old man. He's been married twice, and

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Speaker 2: according to him, both marriages ended because his wives got

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Speaker 2: lazy and tried to deprive him of sex. He also

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Speaker 2: complain about them spending too much money. Well, since we've

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Speaker 2: been together, he's been a great provider and money has

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Speaker 2: never been an issue. I wanted to get to know

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Speaker 2: him better, to see if he's the reason he had

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Speaker 2: the two divorces after almost a year of dating, I

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Speaker 2: think it was the sex that drove his two wives away.

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Speaker 2: This man has a very high sex drive, and I

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Speaker 2: find it hard to keep up with him in the bedroom.

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Speaker 2: It's not just the high sex drive, it's his size too.

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Speaker 2: He is unbelievably well endowed, and I've set limits on

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Speaker 2: how often we have sex by telling him I'm waiting

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Speaker 2: for marriage. That's helped keep him off me for a while,

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Speaker 2: but now he's coming for me all the time because

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Speaker 2: he's claimed me as his third wife. I told him

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Speaker 2: we haven't even been together a year, so he needs

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Speaker 2: to slow.

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Speaker 1: Down on the marriage talk.

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Speaker 2: I don't like telling him no, but I can't do

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Speaker 2: it as often as he'd like to. He's too much

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Speaker 2: for me, and I feel like I should be the

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Speaker 2: one that's got.

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Speaker 1: All of the stamina. Because I'm a lot younger than

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Speaker 1: he is.

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Speaker 2: I'm finding it harder and harder to keep him happy

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Speaker 2: without having a lot of sex.

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Speaker 1: He knows what he's working with.

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Speaker 2: So he should respect my body enough to put a

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Speaker 2: reasonable time limit on our activities in the bedroom. If

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Speaker 2: I'm going to be his third wife, I'll have to

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Speaker 2: said guidelines on how often we're intimate. Do you think

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Speaker 2: that will be a deal breaker for him? Well, I'm

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Speaker 2: not really concerned about him right at this moment. I'm

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Speaker 2: concerned more about you. And why are you more worried

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Speaker 2: about his feelings and what's going on with your own

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Speaker 2: body and how you feel.

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Speaker 1: This forty year old man is only thinking of his needs.

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Speaker 2: He wants sex, and he wants a lot of it,

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Speaker 2: which is okay if both parties agree. You got to

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Speaker 2: be in agreement with this stuff. But that's not the

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Speaker 2: case here. He's selfish with what he wants. He's thinking

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Speaker 2: about the fact that this may be he's not thinking

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Speaker 2: about the fact that I should say that this is

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Speaker 2: causing you some discomfort, some pain. He's got you so

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Speaker 2: upset that you can't keep up with him that all

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Speaker 2: you do is second guess yourself. I like that you

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Speaker 2: put him on a sex diet. That is a good

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Speaker 2: thing if he's if he's too much, you know right now,

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Speaker 2: just imagine if you get married to this guy. Yeah,

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Speaker 2: you need some guidelines. You asked about setting them. You

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Speaker 2: absolutely must do what's best for you in this instance.

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Speaker 1: Okay, he's not trying to hear what you have to say.

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Speaker 2: Anyway, he may be well in doubt, but does he

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Speaker 2: really know what he's doing with it?

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Speaker 1: You know, all the time? Does he know?

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Speaker 2: I mean, you know, sex should be fun, it should

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Speaker 2: be pleasurable, it should be enjoyable. So please continue to

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Speaker 2: go at your own pace, your own pace, okay, and

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Speaker 2: make him make the necessary adjustments in this situation. Please

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Speaker 2: don't marry him right now because you can't handle him

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Speaker 2: right now. And if you can't handle him right now,

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Speaker 2: if you get married to him, and he's really gonna

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Speaker 2: think he should get it all the time, So you

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Speaker 2: need to rethink this situation. If this is not this

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Speaker 2: might not be for you. It might be just be

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Speaker 2: too much for you.

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Speaker 4: Steve, Well, well, well, well, well, I know that you've

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Speaker 4: asked me in the past.

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Speaker 3: Surely, yes, not to make these letters out me.

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Speaker 1: But you can't help it, can you, especially ones like these?

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Speaker 4: Well, be honest, this ain't about me at all, But

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Speaker 4: I got I got a couple of things I need

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Speaker 4: to address about this letter that it's gonna sound like

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Speaker 4: I know what I'm talking about, but I'm gonna do

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Speaker 4: it in a lighthearted way because this problem that you.

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Speaker 5: Have, lady, Eh, that problem is not as widespread as

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Speaker 5: people make it out to be.

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Speaker 4: In other words, this ain't a very com I'm in

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Speaker 4: the problem. All we like to say it is, Oh,

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Speaker 4: we'll lie.

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Speaker 3: About it, but this everybody.

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Speaker 4: Don't have this problem right here, and we will discuss

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Speaker 4: the real problem in a minute. You're twenty eight dating

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Speaker 4: this forty you old man been married twice and according

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Speaker 4: to him, both his marriage ended because his wise and

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Speaker 4: here is the key, got lazy and tried to deprive

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Speaker 4: him of sex. Now the key word in this letter

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Speaker 4: is they got lazy, meaning they didn't want to they

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Speaker 4: didn't feel like it.

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Speaker 3: Uh not now maybe some other time. Well yeah, and

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Speaker 3: why is that? Because of what he working with here?

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Speaker 1: In that wrong?

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Speaker 4: You got to know, you got to know, you know

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Speaker 4: if you're blessed or not. And you got to learn

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Speaker 4: how to distribute your blessings. Okay, you can't just pass

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Speaker 4: out blessings all the time. You got to you got

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Speaker 4: to distribute your blessings different.

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Speaker 1: Uh huh.

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Speaker 3: We come back.

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Speaker 4: I'm gonna share with you some things that people haven't

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Speaker 4: looked at in this letter. You just think she can't

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Speaker 4: handle the way he is he won't sex all the time,

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Speaker 4: and he's well and doubt he's just too much.

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Speaker 3: Well, you know, we'll talk about that.

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Speaker 2: Hang on, we'll have part two of Steve's response coming

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Speaker 2: up at twenty three minutes after the hour. Today's Strawberry Letter, subject,

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Speaker 2: I can't do that often. All right, we'll get back

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Speaker 2: into it right after this. You're listening Steve Harvey Morning Show.

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Speaker 6: This winter, the world will be watching the best skaters

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Speaker 6: chase their Olympic dreams. For your child, that dream could

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Speaker 6: start right here at your local rink. Through learn to

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Speaker 6: Skate USA, kids build strength, confidence, and courage, the same

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Speaker 6: qualities that take athletes to the Olympic ice. Learn to

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Speaker 6: Skate USA offers programs for skaters of all ages and abilities.

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Speaker 6: This is where the journey begins. Find a program near

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Speaker 6: you at learn to Skate usa dot com. Because every

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Speaker 6: champion starts with a first glide.

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Speaker 2: All right, See this letter I think deserves the disclaimer.

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Speaker 2: If you have small children in the car writing with

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Speaker 2: you as you listen to this letter, you might not

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Speaker 2: want them to hear this one. But having said that,

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Speaker 2: and having said that, let's recap today's Strawberry Letter.

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Speaker 1: You know, I do that often.

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Speaker 3: The disclaim is real. But I'm gonna try to be.

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Speaker 4: Very small and I'm going to be very cagy with

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Speaker 4: how i handle this good because we all know what

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Speaker 4: we're talking about. This as this twenty eight year old

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Speaker 4: girl is dating this forty year old woman is tea

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Speaker 4: and wait dating this for the old man that's been

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Speaker 4: divorced twice. And he's been divorced because he say the

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Speaker 4: women were lazy and deprived him of sex and because

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Speaker 4: he wants it too often. And you've discovered that in

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Speaker 4: dealing with him. But it's not just his high sex drive.

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Speaker 4: It's the size of what he's dealing with its creating problems.

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Speaker 4: But you know, once again, that's surely and I talked

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Speaker 4: about at the beginning.

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Speaker 3: I try not to make these letters about and I.

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Speaker 4: Won't on this one right here, But somehow I don't

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Speaker 4: really have all that problem.

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Speaker 3: I had that problem in.

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Speaker 4: The past before complicasions, but then and then I've also

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Speaker 4: had the problem where I just wasn't quite enough. You know,

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Speaker 4: I've been on both sides of the coin I've had

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Speaker 4: talking about what you're doing.

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Speaker 3: Well, hold up, non you know, hello, hello, hello, Hello, way.

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Speaker 1: Read the letter anyway.

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Speaker 4: Cat anyway anyway. It's not just as high dress sex

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Speaker 4: drives decidey too. He's unbelievably well and down.

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Speaker 3: I've set limits on how often we have sex by

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Speaker 3: telling him I'm waiting for marriage. Now.

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Speaker 4: That kind of brought you some time right there. I

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Speaker 4: told him we haven't been together. He claimed you as

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Speaker 4: his third wife. You told him we ain't been together

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Speaker 4: long enough, so we need to slow down on the

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Speaker 4: marriage talk. I don't like telling him no, but I

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Speaker 4: can't do it as often as he liked to, and

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Speaker 4: he's too much for me. I feel like I should

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Speaker 4: be the one that's got all the stamina because I'm

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Speaker 4: a lot younger than he is. You know you're gonna

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Speaker 4: learn that ain't got nothing to do with it. Nah,

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Speaker 4: we talking about me now, nine, That's why I come

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Speaker 4: here that now.

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Speaker 1: Hold on now.

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Speaker 3: Little girl, hold on, little girl, hold now. You know

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Speaker 3: I ain't all of what he is you talking about.

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Speaker 4: But you know you know I have I have and

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Speaker 4: you know I have had people you know, got to

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Speaker 4: catch their.

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Speaker 3: Breath, you know what I'm saying, Coach time you know

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Speaker 3: here now and then you know right here, I've never

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Speaker 3: had no lord.

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Speaker 4: I ain't never had nobody like grab their clothes and

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Speaker 4: run out of the room. You know, just because I

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Speaker 4: walked out the bathroom, anybody went like, I can't try this.

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Speaker 3: You know, I ain't never had that problem. Anyway. He

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Speaker 3: knows what he's.

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Speaker 4: Working with, so he should respect my body enough to

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Speaker 4: put a reasonable time living on our activities in the bedroom.

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Speaker 4: If I'm going to be his third wife, I'll have

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Speaker 4: to set some guidelines. Are hating we in him it?

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Speaker 4: Do you think this would be a deal break from him?

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Speaker 4: I think at the rate this is going, he will

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Speaker 4: be looking for his fourth wife. That's what I think

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Speaker 4: is gonna happen. Sureley is absolutely right. You cannot marry

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Speaker 4: this man. He is too much. He is too much

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Speaker 4: for most people. Two women in front of you have

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Speaker 4: tried this and failed. You are number three and you

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Speaker 4: are failing, and you ain't even the white see y'all

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Speaker 4: getting man thanking you, mad man. You gonna cut him

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Speaker 4: off just so you can have a husband. But you

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Speaker 4: got to deal with all these blessings he got.

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Speaker 3: He's stupid. He don't know how to do it. Now.

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Speaker 3: What this man needs to do is before he.

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Speaker 4: Starts meeting other women, he's got to have some questions

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Speaker 4: for women. He's got to go at this and be

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Speaker 4: a little bit more conniving and a little bit more telling. So, Shirley,

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Speaker 4: you're about to date me the man in the letter,

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Speaker 4: and I'm gonna add I'm gonna interview you. Now, I'm

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Speaker 4: gonna interview you all right, now here we go, let

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Speaker 4: me ask you any baby girl?

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Speaker 3: How you doing today? Baby?

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Speaker 2: Hi?

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Speaker 1: How are you? Honey?

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Speaker 2: You know?

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Speaker 4: I want to ask you a couple of questions. I

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Speaker 4: know we were talking about being into it, but I

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Speaker 4: just have a couple of questions, you know, see, huh.

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Speaker 3: Okay, let me ask you something right here.

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Speaker 4: When you go to a fast food restaurant and you

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Speaker 4: have to drive through one, do you ever ask for supersize?

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Speaker 1: No?

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Speaker 2: No, no, I'm no, I'm trying to, you know, watch

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Speaker 2: my sick, watch my way.

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Speaker 3: We're gonna have some problem.

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Speaker 4: But let me ask you another question right here. How

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Speaker 4: do you handle extreme pressure?

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Speaker 1: I work well under pressure.

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Speaker 3: But okay, that's good, that's good. That's good. Right there. Okay,

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Speaker 3: let me ask you a question. Are you very limber?

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Speaker 1: You know I used to be in my younger day.

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Speaker 4: Well, you have like in the gymnastics or cheer lead

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Speaker 4: or anything like that. Okay, well that ain't good right there.

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Speaker 4: When the last time you had surgery?

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Speaker 1: Surgery?

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Speaker 3: Surgery? Do you do well with anesthesia and stuff like that?

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Speaker 1: I've never really had.

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Speaker 4: And one last question right here, do you have insurance.

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Speaker 1: To have insurance?

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Speaker 3: Yes? Oh, well I don't think you and I should

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Speaker 3: be dated.

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Speaker 1: Yeah, I don't think so.

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Speaker 4: Why you probably wondered why I asked you questions like that. Oh,

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Speaker 4: it's just a little problem I've had in the past.

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Speaker 2: Leave your comments on Instagram and Steve Harvey FM.

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Speaker 1: On Today's Strawberry.

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Speaker 3: Letters, check out how the Surgery.

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Speaker 2: Check out the Strawberry Letter podcast coming on demand.

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Speaker 1: Good morning, This is Shirley Strawberry and Tims.

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Speaker 2: The season for happiness and love and giving and family,

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Speaker 2: Happy Holidays from the Steve Harvey Morning Show.

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Speaker 1: You're listening to The Steve Harvey Morning Show.