WEBVTT - Life After Prison with Angela Wright 0:00:00.080 --> 0:00:04.400 I'm a little duvall and this is Conversations with the Podcast. 0:00:04.600 --> 0:00:08.360 Today's guest is an ex convict, recently released after serving 0:00:08.400 --> 0:00:11.959 fourteen years in prison. She's a speaker and master bother ate. 0:00:12.080 --> 0:00:16.480 Let's welcome Angela Wright, live and direct in your ear checked. 0:00:17.000 --> 0:00:19.520 She boy a little duval vibe and decent. But I'm 0:00:19.520 --> 0:00:21.439 gonna start this shit off quick. I'm gonna start us 0:00:21.440 --> 0:00:25.200 off with somebody I just met. They seeing coolest motherfucker. 0:00:25.200 --> 0:00:27.800 I said, you know what, I need to hear your story, 0:00:27.880 --> 0:00:30.240 but I'm gonna record that motherfucker. 0:00:30.920 --> 0:00:32.519 Who we got with us? What's your name? Tell me 0:00:32.560 --> 0:00:33.000 what's up? 0:00:33.159 --> 0:00:36.440 Uncle Dee? You got Angela c right with you here today? 0:00:37.240 --> 0:00:42.200 Born and raised in New Jersey. Live in Atlanta, Lakewood, 0:00:42.280 --> 0:00:44.280 South Jersey, South Jersey. Yeah it look come from a 0:00:44.320 --> 0:00:48.920 little small town, a two parent home father pastor. Mom 0:00:49.040 --> 0:00:50.160 was a stay at home mom. 0:00:50.520 --> 0:00:53.000 Well, let me first say what made me say, oh yeah, 0:00:53.000 --> 0:00:56.800 I'm talk to her? She said, Nigga, I just did 0:00:56.880 --> 0:00:59.440 fair time, I did such and such. I was down 0:00:59.440 --> 0:01:02.200 there with your people's in flood. And then I say, 0:01:02.320 --> 0:01:04.360 oh shit, the fuck the. 0:01:04.360 --> 0:01:05.320 Fuck you do? Fit? 0:01:05.560 --> 0:01:08.399 Damn for wait, don't even tell me, come tell me 0:01:08.600 --> 0:01:12.000 on the goddamn Mike. So before you tell us that, 0:01:12.160 --> 0:01:15.840 let's give a quick backstory and then speed us up 0:01:15.840 --> 0:01:17.399 to where you got to the Dope Game? 0:01:17.840 --> 0:01:20.199 Was it the dope game? Yes? It was the game. 0:01:20.360 --> 0:01:21.399 No, it was the dope game. 0:01:21.440 --> 0:01:22.120 I wish it was. 0:01:22.880 --> 0:01:24.920 Yeah, Fri, you would have got that much time. But 0:01:25.840 --> 0:01:27.440 it don't last as long as But go ahead. 0:01:27.440 --> 0:01:30.200 But like I said, I was born and raised in 0:01:30.200 --> 0:01:33.399 New Jersey, come from a two parent home. Went to 0:01:33.440 --> 0:01:36.520 college here in Atlanta. I went to Clark Atlanta University, 0:01:37.000 --> 0:01:39.399 and once I graduated school, I never cared. I just 0:01:39.440 --> 0:01:42.120 never went back home. I stayed here in Atlanta, and 0:01:42.160 --> 0:01:44.119 that's how I ended up, you know, being here whatever 0:01:44.120 --> 0:01:47.560 I talked, Ye that I graduated in two thousand and two, Okay, Yeah, 0:01:47.600 --> 0:01:48.840 were around the same age. 0:01:48.960 --> 0:01:51.440 I'm older. I was here in ninety six when Olympics came. 0:01:51.680 --> 0:01:53.680 No, I came to school in ninety seven. But I 0:01:53.720 --> 0:01:56.160 graduated in two thousand and two. Oh yeah, I came 0:01:56.200 --> 0:01:56.880 in ninety seven. 0:01:57.120 --> 0:02:00.600 Okay, So you've been around in a long time, around 0:02:00.640 --> 0:02:04.000 this way a bunch of times, of course, cause I've 0:02:04.000 --> 0:02:07.160 been around. Yeah, finished telling Yeah. 0:02:07.040 --> 0:02:09.720 So, like I said, I taught school. I was a 0:02:09.720 --> 0:02:12.880 school teacher. I taught over at Gideon's Elementary that's on 0:02:12.960 --> 0:02:15.840 the that's where Mechanic Bill is over like on that 0:02:15.919 --> 0:02:18.320 side of town. Taught third grade or whatever. And I 0:02:18.360 --> 0:02:21.080 taught school maybe about two years til I jumped, like 0:02:21.280 --> 0:02:23.600 just said I wasn't teaching no more, and just jumped 0:02:23.639 --> 0:02:26.040 head first in the streets. You know, I started out 0:02:26.040 --> 0:02:26.520 in college. 0:02:26.520 --> 0:02:28.680 Woy because you aren't making enough money in school teaching. 0:02:29.080 --> 0:02:31.160 It wasn't that one day me and the principal end 0:02:31.240 --> 0:02:33.640 up exchanging words. You know, I was young. You gotta 0:02:33.680 --> 0:02:37.400 think back then, back in two thousand and two, it 0:02:37.520 --> 0:02:39.959 wasn't a lot of young school teachers. It was still 0:02:40.000 --> 0:02:44.040 like the older school teachers stern. You know, the LNG 0:02:44.160 --> 0:02:47.079 dressing here, it is that it's changing. I'm young, I'm 0:02:47.919 --> 0:02:50.880 then when she was changed, Yeah, I'm wearing my pants fitted. 0:02:51.040 --> 0:02:52.720 I'm not wearing I don't have to wear no long 0:02:52.800 --> 0:02:55.000 dress like I'm a nun. I'm not doing that. And 0:02:55.040 --> 0:02:57.720 then she we would exchange words about that, and then 0:02:57.880 --> 0:02:59.840 she was worried about like the cars that came up 0:03:00.040 --> 0:03:02.000 of the school on my lunch break, to getting just 0:03:02.000 --> 0:03:04.320 worried about the wrong thing, and I ended up going 0:03:04.360 --> 0:03:05.720 off on the one day and in my head, I 0:03:05.720 --> 0:03:07.040 was like, man, I don't even have to take this. 0:03:07.280 --> 0:03:09.320 I make this in three days what I'm making. 0:03:09.440 --> 0:03:11.560 So you already knew you could do that before you. 0:03:11.600 --> 0:03:14.919 Jo, I was already. I was teaching school and in 0:03:15.000 --> 0:03:17.760 the game. I started out counting money for these dudes. 0:03:18.120 --> 0:03:19.880 They used to pay me like five thousand dollars a 0:03:19.880 --> 0:03:22.320 week to count money, package it up. And you know, 0:03:22.320 --> 0:03:25.320 when you package money, you gotta count every denomination, run 0:03:25.320 --> 0:03:26.720 it through the machine. 0:03:26.360 --> 0:03:30.000 All right before you before you make sure everything because 0:03:30.000 --> 0:03:31.040 I don't want to get you in trouble. 0:03:31.440 --> 0:03:34.000 Oh this case is oh gone, okay, we all. 0:03:33.880 --> 0:03:36.160 Want to I just want to make sure. I don't 0:03:36.240 --> 0:03:38.880 like to set people up there. Yeah, people talk, don't 0:03:38.920 --> 0:03:41.920 even really, I'm not lad. I'm not wanting nah. 0:03:42.760 --> 0:03:43.920 Yeah, And I won't let you put me in the 0:03:43.920 --> 0:03:44.680 trick bag anyway. 0:03:46.640 --> 0:03:46.880 Yeah. 0:03:46.920 --> 0:03:49.240 But that's how I started out it. You know, just 0:03:49.280 --> 0:03:51.280 got greedy seeing all that money go through my hands, 0:03:51.280 --> 0:03:53.640 and I'm like, oh, I can broke with these cocaine. 0:03:53.920 --> 0:03:56.560 He got it he needed. And that's how it started. 0:03:56.600 --> 0:03:58.560 And before you know that, I had cousins down in 0:03:58.560 --> 0:04:02.160 Panama City, Florida. So they started getting they work from 0:04:02.280 --> 0:04:02.920 up here from me. 0:04:02.960 --> 0:04:07.080 And then from Atlanta, Panama. They were from Atlanta, Panama City. 0:04:07.080 --> 0:04:09.000 You got to think about it. Panama City is right 0:04:09.000 --> 0:04:11.800 there at the top of Alabama. It's not down there 0:04:11.800 --> 0:04:14.520 in Miami. It's at the top. So it's only four 0:04:14.520 --> 0:04:15.560 hours away from Atlanta. 0:04:15.600 --> 0:04:16.520 It's quicker to get it. 0:04:16.520 --> 0:04:18.719 It's quicker to get it. Yeah, it's quicker to get it. 0:04:18.760 --> 0:04:21.520 That whole panhandle right there, and then Dothan, Alabama. 0:04:21.600 --> 0:04:23.560 Get y'all was pumping Florida on the low. 0:04:23.760 --> 0:04:30.200 Yeah, Parry, Florida, Yup, yup, Tallahassee that whole panhandle right there. Yeah, 0:04:30.240 --> 0:04:31.800 So I got in trouble. My case was over the 0:04:31.800 --> 0:04:32.200 pair hand. 0:04:32.279 --> 0:04:34.279 How you got caught up? How you got caught? 0:04:34.880 --> 0:04:36.680 How you think everybody told? 0:04:36.720 --> 0:04:39.680 I know told, But like, what was the Did you 0:04:39.720 --> 0:04:40.359 see it coming? 0:04:40.839 --> 0:04:44.000 Yeah? I seen it coming. I can't even lie. I'm 0:04:44.040 --> 0:04:47.200 a very very spiritual person, and I always believed like 0:04:47.600 --> 0:04:49.000 warning comes before destructions. 0:04:49.000 --> 0:04:50.360 We let me ask you if it's not to cut 0:04:50.440 --> 0:04:52.839 you off, but I did. How many years was you 0:04:53.080 --> 0:04:54.960 was it running? How many years was you. 0:04:54.960 --> 0:04:56.120 Had like a seven year run? 0:04:56.200 --> 0:04:56.479 Okay? 0:04:56.600 --> 0:04:57.800 Yep, I had a seven year run. 0:04:57.839 --> 0:04:58.360 That ain't bad. 0:04:58.560 --> 0:04:59.800 No, it wasn't bad. 0:05:00.200 --> 0:05:00.680 Live good. 0:05:00.760 --> 0:05:02.320 You know. I had a seven year run. It wasn't 0:05:02.360 --> 0:05:04.800 worth it in the end because I got sentenced to 0:05:04.880 --> 0:05:05.839 thirty years do ball? 0:05:05.920 --> 0:05:07.800 Wait wait wait wait wait wait, don't go there yet. 0:05:07.960 --> 0:05:11.360 Oh man, don't shit. 0:05:14.880 --> 0:05:21.440 Shit. Yeah. So okay, so not the not the you know, 0:05:21.560 --> 0:05:23.279 get that part or whatever that spoiler. 0:05:23.839 --> 0:05:26.520 But you know you said how much the most you made? 0:05:26.720 --> 0:05:30.000 Like in one lick and one one one. 0:05:30.080 --> 0:05:34.240 I tell you this one dude from. 0:05:34.040 --> 0:05:35.800 What was you doing? Was you the mule or was 0:05:35.839 --> 0:05:36.160 you like. 0:05:36.240 --> 0:05:38.800 Never m do? 0:05:38.920 --> 0:05:41.920 I look like? Check the fuck you. 0:05:41.960 --> 0:05:42.599 Me and the mule? 0:05:42.800 --> 0:05:44.719 Play with me? Go ahead? 0:05:44.839 --> 0:05:46.599 No, So I can tell you this. This one dude 0:05:46.640 --> 0:05:50.320 from Tallahassee. He used to come to Atlanta, UH three 0:05:50.360 --> 0:05:53.960 times a week and get eleven kilos. Every like every 0:05:54.000 --> 0:05:56.440 three days he came and got eleven kilos. So if 0:05:56.480 --> 0:05:58.960 I was getting them for seventeen to five at the 0:05:59.040 --> 0:06:02.279 time and I'm selling them to twenty four, that goes 0:06:02.320 --> 0:06:02.880 to show. 0:06:02.640 --> 0:06:07.359 You this because and I always wanted this, especially at 0:06:07.400 --> 0:06:10.760 landa niggas, How did y'all figure out who who did 0:06:10.880 --> 0:06:15.279 trust was serving? Because especially Florida niggas. I'm from Florida 0:06:15.279 --> 0:06:18.760 and not know how slammy Florida niggas. So that's why 0:06:18.760 --> 0:06:22.320 I always wondered, like, how did y'all even trust. 0:06:22.240 --> 0:06:24.560 I met him through somebody else? But this was my 0:06:24.680 --> 0:06:26.440 sign that I knew I shouldn't have. I should have 0:06:26.520 --> 0:06:27.520 just stopped dealing with him. 0:06:27.600 --> 0:06:28.839 Is that the one that fucked you over? 0:06:30.120 --> 0:06:30.240 Oh? 0:06:30.320 --> 0:06:33.239 Yeah, the Florida niggas? Yeah he won? Yeah yeah, the Florida. 0:06:33.560 --> 0:06:37.320 All the Florida dudes was in court. Marianna, Florida didn't 0:06:37.320 --> 0:06:44.039 even know me. Okay, okay, okay. Yeah. So but like 0:06:44.080 --> 0:06:46.880 I said, I'm a spiritual person. So one night I 0:06:47.040 --> 0:06:50.760 was driving and I was looking up in the rear 0:06:50.839 --> 0:06:52.760 view mirror and I was putting some lip gloss on, 0:06:53.080 --> 0:06:55.280 and the spirit said to me, you're going to jail. 0:06:56.480 --> 0:07:02.200 And I said, yeah, it ain't funny, You're going to jail. Yeah, 0:07:02.640 --> 0:07:05.920 And guess what I didn't. Uh. I tried to shake 0:07:05.960 --> 0:07:08.880 it off, but it was already it was already set. 0:07:08.920 --> 0:07:11.120 And I could tell you like a year before that, 0:07:11.520 --> 0:07:14.200 my father, he had came down to visit me, and 0:07:14.240 --> 0:07:17.400 he stayed when it was like the tend Jake's thing 0:07:17.600 --> 0:07:20.920 at the TD Jake's thing, and he told me, he said, 0:07:21.720 --> 0:07:24.280 Ray Charls could see something that's going on. I was like, oh, Daddy, 0:07:24.280 --> 0:07:25.720 you always preaching. I don't want to hear it. I 0:07:25.760 --> 0:07:27.840 don't want to hear it. And uh he called me 0:07:27.880 --> 0:07:29.960 one morning he said, God said you're too high mighty. 0:07:30.000 --> 0:07:31.760 He got to bring you down. I was like, Daddy, 0:07:31.880 --> 0:07:33.720 is too early in the morning. I don't get on 0:07:33.800 --> 0:07:37.520 my phone with that. But guess what, those were my warnings. 0:07:37.720 --> 0:07:38.840 Those were my warnings. 0:07:38.960 --> 0:07:41.240 So but you raised in the good family, how was 0:07:41.280 --> 0:07:41.920 you raised? Yeah? 0:07:42.000 --> 0:07:45.080 Two pairn home. I told you my father was a pastor. 0:07:45.120 --> 0:07:47.360 I'm the least like person that ever I was an 0:07:47.400 --> 0:07:48.360 a b student. 0:07:48.760 --> 0:07:49.840 Was the chase of the money. 0:07:50.880 --> 0:07:53.680 You know what it was. It was being spoiled as 0:07:53.720 --> 0:07:57.480 a child, being spoiled as a child. Not only this 0:07:57.640 --> 0:07:59.960 people people, you know, people get mad when I say this. 0:08:00.200 --> 0:08:04.800 But being a pastor child, you watch how much power 0:08:05.680 --> 0:08:08.440 your father has. You see how people flock to him. 0:08:08.600 --> 0:08:11.520 So that's how I chose my men. You get what 0:08:11.560 --> 0:08:11.960 I'm saying. 0:08:12.040 --> 0:08:12.440 Powerful. 0:08:12.680 --> 0:08:15.320 I like powerful men. I don't like no weak sucker behind. 0:08:15.560 --> 0:08:18.400 I like powerful men. And then and then to see 0:08:18.440 --> 0:08:21.760 the power that how people was drawing to my father 0:08:21.840 --> 0:08:24.840 and stuff naturally growing up, that's how it was, because 0:08:24.840 --> 0:08:27.200 then it's handed down to the kids. Everybody cater to 0:08:27.240 --> 0:08:30.400 the pastor kids. And then I looked just like I 0:08:30.440 --> 0:08:32.800 had at the well back then I grew up, it 0:08:32.840 --> 0:08:35.120 was three of us, but my dad's remarried, so now 0:08:35.200 --> 0:08:36.560 it's it's six of us all together. 0:08:36.640 --> 0:08:37.439 And where was you at? 0:08:38.040 --> 0:08:39.800 I was a middle baby. They call the knee. 0:08:39.559 --> 0:08:43.280 Baby, the one that I always felt. They say, babies 0:08:43.320 --> 0:08:44.280 always feel left out. 0:08:44.480 --> 0:08:48.840 Can't be not with a mouth like mine, Capricorn New 0:08:48.920 --> 0:08:50.240 Year's Day, everything start with me. 0:08:50.360 --> 0:08:55.520 Oh yeah, your jury to the mailbox. I'm fucking with. 0:08:59.480 --> 0:09:02.480 Ship. I did not wear my. 0:09:06.280 --> 0:09:08.360 So what happened? What did it? What did it come down? 0:09:08.440 --> 0:09:08.520 Like? 0:09:08.559 --> 0:09:11.400 When did when did the drug? The bus come? 0:09:11.679 --> 0:09:15.480 Two thousand and five started in two thousand and five 0:09:16.480 --> 0:09:18.280 A driver got a conspiracy. 0:09:18.440 --> 0:09:19.520 They just came and set. 0:09:19.360 --> 0:09:22.320 You up conspiracy. I got indicted by myself. They came 0:09:22.320 --> 0:09:24.880 back and gave me a superseding indictment and gave me 0:09:24.960 --> 0:09:26.560 the due that I was going with at the time. 0:09:26.600 --> 0:09:28.959 They made him my co defended. And what I did 0:09:29.040 --> 0:09:31.800 not know is he was talking. My boyfriend told. 0:09:31.679 --> 0:09:34.560 On me, nigga, I just saw that on the trip. 0:09:34.880 --> 0:09:38.480 I was just watching that. The nigga, the bitch. Nigga 0:09:38.640 --> 0:09:40.880 told on lady Yea. 0:09:41.640 --> 0:09:43.880 I always tell people like I go to schools now 0:09:43.920 --> 0:09:44.400 and speak to. 0:09:44.480 --> 0:09:49.480 Kids, You like, how the fuck this nigga? 0:09:50.240 --> 0:09:54.000 Because he had already he had got he got caught, 0:09:54.000 --> 0:09:56.360 he had got busted. I wasn't even around. I was in. 0:09:56.480 --> 0:09:58.480 It was All Star weekend two thousand and seven. I 0:09:58.559 --> 0:10:01.680 was in Vegas at the All Star Game. He got caught. 0:10:01.720 --> 0:10:04.360 Somebody like set him up. He had already been in 0:10:04.400 --> 0:10:06.520 trouble before. So you know, the fans worked by a 0:10:06.559 --> 0:10:10.320 point system, so he was automatically facing a mandatory minimum 0:10:10.360 --> 0:10:12.800 of twenty years. And I guess he felt like, man, 0:10:12.840 --> 0:10:15.040 I can't do it. Yeah, get it, get it down. 0:10:15.280 --> 0:10:17.400 And they told him like, we want her, we know 0:10:17.440 --> 0:10:19.800 we just can't get to it. We know who she is. 0:10:20.320 --> 0:10:22.240 Give you give us us, We give you ten years. 0:10:22.440 --> 0:10:23.040 He gave them me. 0:10:23.480 --> 0:10:25.600 Of course, Yeah, did you forgive him? 0:10:26.920 --> 0:10:29.160 So you know you have to in order for God 0:10:29.200 --> 0:10:30.600 to forgive you, you know, you have to. 0:10:30.520 --> 0:10:33.520 Figure how long for you to get over it. 0:10:33.520 --> 0:10:35.520 It took me about I ain't gonna lie about a 0:10:35.520 --> 0:10:38.000 good ten years in prison. I was, you know, I 0:10:38.040 --> 0:10:42.000 was bitter behind it. But and the crazy thing is, 0:10:42.080 --> 0:10:45.600 about three months ago one of my homeboys face timedy, 0:10:45.920 --> 0:10:48.160 he like, and somebody wanted to talk to you, and 0:10:48.280 --> 0:10:53.400 guess who it was. I went crazy because I can 0:10:53.520 --> 0:10:55.559 forgive somebody, but I don't have to deal with you. 0:10:55.960 --> 0:10:58.440 And what audacity do you have to even want to 0:10:58.440 --> 0:11:01.120 say anything to me? Took me away from my son. 0:11:01.160 --> 0:11:03.120 My son was My son was ten when I left. 0:11:03.160 --> 0:11:05.439 If I came home, he was twenty five. I'm got 0:11:05.440 --> 0:11:06.200 nothing to say to you. 0:11:06.520 --> 0:11:06.840 Damn. 0:11:06.880 --> 0:11:09.840 So you did fifteen? I did fourteen year fourteen off 0:11:09.880 --> 0:11:11.000 of twenty three, no. 0:11:10.960 --> 0:11:11.680 Off of thirty? 0:11:11.800 --> 0:11:12.360 What did you? 0:11:12.400 --> 0:11:15.000 What did you when you were when you got locked up? 0:11:15.440 --> 0:11:16.960 What did you think you was looking? Because I know 0:11:17.000 --> 0:11:18.320 you say, all right, I know I'm going to jail. 0:11:18.440 --> 0:11:20.840 I was thinking I get ten years because with the fads, 0:11:20.840 --> 0:11:23.360 it's the mandatory minimums. So I was thinking, I get. 0:11:23.280 --> 0:11:25.040 To why they fucked you up while they said fuck 0:11:25.080 --> 0:11:25.840 you and get your thirds. 0:11:25.840 --> 0:11:29.800 The amount of drugs and I wouldn't cooperate the amount 0:11:29.840 --> 0:11:30.440 of drugs and I. 0:11:30.440 --> 0:11:32.840 Wouldn't I got what made you stand tall? 0:11:33.679 --> 0:11:35.040 What make you not stand tall? 0:11:35.559 --> 0:11:36.080 Type shit? 0:11:36.320 --> 0:11:39.160 Yeah, I was raised that even as a child, you 0:11:39.200 --> 0:11:41.400 don't tell on your sisters and brothers, and you definitely 0:11:41.440 --> 0:11:44.640 don't point the finger at somebody else because you got caught. 0:11:44.800 --> 0:11:47.640 You don't do that. And yes, my mother, cause you can. 0:11:47.679 --> 0:11:49.120 I mean a lot of people talk that, but when 0:11:49.160 --> 0:11:50.679 they get they fold under pressure. 0:11:50.800 --> 0:11:52.960 And you know what I tell people, I can see 0:11:52.960 --> 0:11:56.400 how people talk because it is intimidating when you sitting 0:11:56.440 --> 0:11:58.520 at a table and it's nothing but a bunch of 0:11:58.559 --> 0:11:59.280 agents around. 0:11:59.400 --> 0:12:00.240 That's how I feel like. 0:12:00.280 --> 0:12:03.280 I don't fault nobody from being like, if you square, 0:12:03.320 --> 0:12:05.680 I expect you to square ship. Did you see the square? 0:12:05.760 --> 0:12:07.360 Did you see the lame in them? Or did you 0:12:07.679 --> 0:12:10.240 this was some surprising to you from that? 0:12:10.320 --> 0:12:10.600 Nigga? 0:12:11.320 --> 0:12:17.800 I feel like, I honestly feel like like women are 0:12:17.800 --> 0:12:19.920 harder men when it come to it. They men just 0:12:19.960 --> 0:12:20.880 cannot do time. 0:12:21.120 --> 0:12:23.520 I believe, not just that, I believe women are more loyal. 0:12:24.160 --> 0:12:26.640 Yeah women that died about that loyalty. Yeah, you know 0:12:26.640 --> 0:12:29.800 what I'm saying. Men are just loyal as far as 0:12:29.800 --> 0:12:32.079 you feed them. Yeah, women they're starve. 0:12:32.360 --> 0:12:32.560 Yeah. 0:12:32.600 --> 0:12:34.920 The people gave me thirty years through all as a 0:12:35.000 --> 0:12:36.520 first time non violince offender. 0:12:37.400 --> 0:12:40.840 Let me ask you that, when when that motherfucker said thirty, 0:12:41.320 --> 0:12:42.520 say wait, how many months? 0:12:42.559 --> 0:12:45.240 They tell you how many hundred sixty four months? 0:12:45.679 --> 0:12:49.960 When you heard that, how did your man skills go 0:12:50.040 --> 0:12:50.880 with twelve divided? 0:12:51.320 --> 0:12:54.360 Yeah? Exactly, exactly, That's exactly what I did. In my head. 0:12:54.400 --> 0:12:57.480 I was like, twelve twelve going to thirty six automatically twelve, 0:12:57.720 --> 0:13:00.600 that's three, that's three, that's automatically thirty, get the four. 0:13:01.120 --> 0:13:03.520 You know, all the salavagis left my mind. I was 0:13:03.600 --> 0:13:04.080 just numb. 0:13:04.559 --> 0:13:06.320 I turned around. How long you were drunk? Like you know, 0:13:06.320 --> 0:13:08.199 when you go to jail, you drunk for how many 0:13:08.520 --> 0:13:09.160 was it years? 0:13:09.200 --> 0:13:10.480 Weeks? How long was you drunk? 0:13:10.480 --> 0:13:10.600 Now? 0:13:11.440 --> 0:13:14.280 Days? Couldn't get up? I lay did three like my 0:13:14.320 --> 0:13:16.640 mom and them was calling to jail, making sure like 0:13:16.720 --> 0:13:18.880 she hasn't called home, like what's going on? I couldn't 0:13:18.880 --> 0:13:22.160 get up. I'm like thirty years. I was thirty years 0:13:22.200 --> 0:13:24.120 old at the time. You know in fas you do 0:13:24.240 --> 0:13:27.000 eighty five percent, So I thirty it was automatic twenty 0:13:27.040 --> 0:13:31.800 six years. Then after like that third day, I got up, 0:13:31.920 --> 0:13:34.760 had to dust myself off, and I just was like okay, 0:13:34.960 --> 0:13:36.960 all right, my nickname is Shaye. I was like, Shay, 0:13:37.440 --> 0:13:40.000 you got yourself in this, you have to find a 0:13:40.000 --> 0:13:41.840 way to get yourself out of it. And I just 0:13:41.880 --> 0:13:44.120 had to believe, like how. 0:13:44.000 --> 0:13:45.280 Long did that really come to? 0:13:45.320 --> 0:13:49.080 Where you when you programmed your mind to say I 0:13:49.080 --> 0:13:52.600 gotta I gotta eat this time that third day? 0:13:52.920 --> 0:13:55.360 No, no, no, I need only three days? What was saying? 0:13:55.480 --> 0:13:57.480 I told myself I had to fight. 0:13:58.000 --> 0:13:59.760 I thought you're gonna say, like a year, like no 0:14:00.160 --> 0:14:03.600 drunk for I know niggas been drunk for six months 0:14:03.640 --> 0:14:04.280 to a year. 0:14:05.160 --> 0:14:07.080 You know what I'm saying, Like, damn, I really ain't 0:14:07.120 --> 0:14:07.600 going nowhere. 0:14:07.760 --> 0:14:09.680 They took my other HOMEBOYD told me it took for 0:14:09.720 --> 0:14:12.880 his birthday to come back around for him to realize, shit, 0:14:13.000 --> 0:14:15.200 I got twelve more of these motherfuckers in here. 0:14:15.320 --> 0:14:17.520 No, I never would give into it. I just used 0:14:17.559 --> 0:14:20.000 to tell myself like something gonna happen, something going break, 0:14:20.400 --> 0:14:22.920 And I just tried to learn everything I could about 0:14:22.960 --> 0:14:25.640 my situation, Like you know, I had to paid attorney, 0:14:26.160 --> 0:14:28.640 told my mom take him seventy five thousand dollars in 0:14:28.640 --> 0:14:31.880 a brown paper, bad cash, and I still had thirty years. 0:14:31.920 --> 0:14:34.000 Then we turned around and paid a pill lawyer another 0:14:34.040 --> 0:14:36.320 twenty five thousand. I lost my director. 0:14:36.360 --> 0:14:37.960 Pell you thank your lawyer fucked you over. 0:14:40.560 --> 0:14:43.600 I can't necessarily say that he messed me over. It 0:14:43.760 --> 0:14:46.960 just wasn't meant. It just wasn't meant. That wasn't the 0:14:47.000 --> 0:14:50.320 way that God seemed fit. And looking back on it, 0:14:51.000 --> 0:14:53.480 I always say, if God had allowed me to get 0:14:53.520 --> 0:14:55.160 five years and be home in three, I would have 0:14:55.200 --> 0:14:57.680 came back home selling the drugs. I would have been, Yeah, 0:14:57.840 --> 0:14:59.360 I would have been or scared. I would have came 0:14:59.440 --> 0:15:00.560 back home doing something. 0:15:00.320 --> 0:15:03.800 Because if they do ten years or better, you can't 0:15:03.800 --> 0:15:06.760 get them doing nothing illegal. No more like all my homeboys, 0:15:06.760 --> 0:15:09.320 like they do four five years, they right back in 0:15:09.360 --> 0:15:09.920 the streets. 0:15:10.120 --> 0:15:10.760 Ten years. 0:15:11.520 --> 0:15:13.960 I couldn't get that nigga across that Georgia Florida line. 0:15:14.840 --> 0:15:18.160 Georgia Florida line. But I guess after a while, you 0:15:18.160 --> 0:15:21.200 you think so you so you think by the so 0:15:21.240 --> 0:15:24.200 he said, if you were there four years, you probably 0:15:24.240 --> 0:15:26.240 would have been back out there. Of course, So that 0:15:26.280 --> 0:15:29.320 means so that means it took some time for you 0:15:29.400 --> 0:15:32.040 to say, to learn like, all right, I fucked up. 0:15:32.920 --> 0:15:36.120 It took time for me to even accept responsibility. Because 0:15:36.160 --> 0:15:39.000 for a long time, I would say, if they hadn't 0:15:39.120 --> 0:15:41.280 told on me, they wouldn't have had me. 0:15:41.320 --> 0:15:44.280 I was take pointing somebody, did somebody in there help 0:15:44.360 --> 0:15:45.560 you get to that mindset? 0:15:45.880 --> 0:15:47.840 No, you have to get that on you. I had 0:15:47.840 --> 0:15:50.080 to get there on my own. Prison is prison is 0:15:50.120 --> 0:15:53.480 a horrible environment. And you know, like a lot of people, 0:15:53.800 --> 0:15:58.880 society believes that prison rehabilitates people. Rehabilitation does not take 0:15:58.920 --> 0:16:01.480 place in prison here, point blank. In order for you 0:16:01.520 --> 0:16:03.280 to change your mindset, that has to be up to 0:16:03.320 --> 0:16:05.680 the individual. You have to do it yourself. And like 0:16:05.720 --> 0:16:09.520 I said, you know, I wasn't I'm not slow at all, 0:16:09.640 --> 0:16:11.920 you know, to stretch imagination. Came out of college with 0:16:11.960 --> 0:16:14.040 a three eight. I'm a smart girl, and God gifted 0:16:14.040 --> 0:16:16.640 me with common sense, book sits and street smarts. You know. 0:16:17.080 --> 0:16:20.880 So I just didn't have nobody there. I didn't feel 0:16:20.920 --> 0:16:22.960 like I had anything common with most of the girls, 0:16:24.480 --> 0:16:31.040 and just no, no, I couldn't turn it off. Especially 0:16:31.320 --> 0:16:33.320 it had to get to a point, believe this man, 0:16:33.400 --> 0:16:35.400 It had to get to a point that I had 0:16:35.480 --> 0:16:38.360 to stop listening to g Like anytime Jeez came on, 0:16:38.600 --> 0:16:41.840 it would take me, It would it would take me back. 0:16:41.880 --> 0:16:43.800 I had to stop listening to it. It would take 0:16:43.840 --> 0:16:46.360 me back to that time, like that was our era, 0:16:46.600 --> 0:16:49.200 you know, that whole that whole era that that that was, 0:16:49.440 --> 0:16:52.000 That was my era. That was when Atlanta the Street, 0:16:52.200 --> 0:16:53.200 Yeah that was that was. 0:16:53.400 --> 0:16:53.640 Yeah. 0:16:54.160 --> 0:16:57.200 Yeah, I had to I had to cut myself off 0:16:57.200 --> 0:16:59.680 from it because I'm like, Shay, you cannot do and 0:16:59.720 --> 0:17:03.080 hear and live out there. Just impossible. You can't. You 0:17:03.120 --> 0:17:05.359 can't be in prison and trying to live outside too. 0:17:05.440 --> 0:17:06.160 You can't do it. 0:17:07.720 --> 0:17:09.639