Speaker 1: I'm not letting nobody else call me that. I'm letting
Speaker 1: mama what you're gonna do.
Speaker 2: If they do, they gonna start laughing at your ass
Speaker 2: because they're nobody gonna be scared. You don't tap your
Speaker 2: feet like this.
Speaker 1: It's gonna distract them.
Speaker 2: I hope you steal off on them. Why you're doing that,
Speaker 2: because that's that is a good distructions that. Imagine somebody
Speaker 2: doing that and you looking down at them, just still
Speaker 2: like though I'm doing that. What are y'all gonna come
Speaker 2: from the side, y'all, I'm not coming. I'm not gonna
Speaker 2: starting doing that. Ain't they called you that? If anything,
Speaker 2: I'm gonna tap my feet.
Speaker 1: So somebody called me the N word, you wouldn't get
Speaker 1: out there with me.
Speaker 2: I would tap my feet while you come from off. Okay,
Speaker 2: either white, We in this together. And then once you
Speaker 2: got them down, once you knock them down, me and
Speaker 2: I'll probably we gotta lot together. We got them together.
Speaker 2: Worry God, I got your bag.
Speaker 3: That's what I'm saying.
Speaker 2: You got a pay what's up, y'all? It's your girl
Speaker 2: les Pete, and it's your girls.
Speaker 3: Dread in the call.
Speaker 1: Now you are tuned in to another episode of Poor Mine.
Speaker 2: We're a drunk mind speaks sober.
Speaker 1: But we ain't got no guests today. We ain't got
Speaker 1: no guests today. You know, we usually do a good
Speaker 1: job of coordinating.
Speaker 3: We didn't today. Not the bankhead bounce.
Speaker 2: We we ain't in bank here, but we close. We're
Speaker 2: in the same city.
Speaker 1: Yeah, you know what's crazy. When I was younger, I
Speaker 1: used to want to be in Atlanta so bad.
Speaker 2: I wanted to be in Atlanta real bad. When they
Speaker 2: came out we Welcome to Atlanta, Oh my gosh. And
Speaker 2: then they had then they did the remix and had
Speaker 2: all in reference on the they have nobody from Houston,
Speaker 2: and I was like, I hate being from Houston. From Warren,
Speaker 2: I was like, Houston ain't got nobody representing on the.
Speaker 1: Trade, not representing on the trade. And I remember when
Speaker 1: what was that.
Speaker 2: Group called was it Cherish? I just thought they were
Speaker 2: just like so cool. They had Cherish?
Speaker 3: What was the other group? Remember VCO Soul Boston.
Speaker 2: So you're like me Area, Yeah that was my song.
Speaker 2: Yeah that was a good song. But yeah, Atlanta. Yeah,
Speaker 2: back in the day, I feel like this was probably
Speaker 2: the best city to live in. Like when Atlanta. I'm
Speaker 2: not in Atlanta when at L came out. Yeah, that's
Speaker 2: what I really wanted to live out here.
Speaker 1: That was when you heard that tagline it.
Speaker 2: Rock never Well, I found you, miss Snooks.
Speaker 1: I was a six that was a hit. Bubba Sparks
Speaker 1: was before his time, and I'm not gonna lie if.
Speaker 2: I wonder what he doing now. I wonder if he's
Speaker 2: still in college Parks.
Speaker 3: I'm gonna get drug to hell for this.
Speaker 1: But in twenty twenty five, if I had to pick
Speaker 1: a white rapper or listen to out of Bubba Sparks
Speaker 1: in eminem, I'm choosing Bubba Sparks every time.
Speaker 2: But you don't. You're not gonna have that many songs.
Speaker 2: It don't matter at least what Buba Sparks said, because
Speaker 2: name another.
Speaker 1: Song when I look extra slick at as Nautica and
Speaker 1: just to think it was you that she bought a fuck.
Speaker 2: That don't blame me. I got a few Bubba Sports.
Speaker 2: Why do you know that you Bubba Sparkles track in
Speaker 2: my pocket? Bro? That's concerning because I only know Colli
Speaker 2: Park was fun. I'm can't no lie. Bubba Sparks first
Speaker 2: album was good. He has some hits on now. I
Speaker 2: don't know you.
Speaker 1: Remember Ugly remem.
Speaker 2: Oh. I do remember that song because it reminded me
Speaker 2: of something that Missy Elliott would make. It was a
Speaker 2: good song produced. That's probably why. Yeah, so that makes
Speaker 2: sense because it definitely sounded like Missy Elliot is. Yeah,
Speaker 2: so you're right, Bubba Sparks did have his Now me,
Speaker 2: I am still a little partial to Eminem. I don't
Speaker 2: care what nobody's saying. Eminem had he he did have.
Speaker 2: Especially if you was like in middle school and you
Speaker 2: was going through that rebellion space, he had you feeling
Speaker 2: like fuck, everybody probably gonna have to do a lot
Speaker 2: of bleepy.
Speaker 1: Okay, first, I feel like this Eminem. I'm never taking
Speaker 1: away from his artistry. So I know they're gonna clip
Speaker 1: this and drag me because Eminem has crazy sings.
Speaker 2: He does, I mean, and he has crazy he but
Speaker 2: he does.
Speaker 1: But what I'll say for me personally, his music didn't
Speaker 1: age well for me.
Speaker 2: A Detroit legend, who is listening to that.
Speaker 1: Me, you're listening to just lose it in the car.
Speaker 1: In the car when oh baby, come on, I'm.
Speaker 2: About to listen to toy Shoulder. Oh heard it that sense
Speaker 2: A little judgement, girl, I just a little judgement. What
Speaker 2: I listened to in the comfort of my own car
Speaker 2: is my beasties.
Speaker 1: Now if somebody turned on Superman, I listen to Superman.
Speaker 1: But I do know one thing though, they come there,
Speaker 1: go do Sunday Monday.
Speaker 2: That line was so hard Drakehead to receave. He did.
Speaker 2: He had to make a whole little new song anyways,
Speaker 2: I feel you.
Speaker 1: But like I said, that's you.
Speaker 2: You bet I'm back. No no, no, no, no no no
Speaker 2: no no, no, sir, because he wanted the Philly No no no, no,
Speaker 2: no no no, Like, what are we doing here? Felthy
Speaker 2: thought me, Like, yeah, he begged him. It's vague, that's all.
Speaker 1: Hi, my name is what nobody is listening to that
Speaker 1: in twenty twenty five, Bro.
Speaker 2: That is how you introduce yourself. No, I don't. When
Speaker 2: you meet people, no I don't, you do You'll be like, Hi,
Speaker 2: my name is Lexi, Why lex By? No? We don't
Speaker 2: slim shady? Oh no respect? Where did the slim shady
Speaker 2: come from? Though?
Speaker 1: Because he was slim and shady he used to throw
Speaker 1: teeth in shade. Remember how I used to this, Christina
Speaker 1: Aguilera is so bad.
Speaker 2: But he was slim shady before that.
Speaker 1: No, he's always been shady.
Speaker 2: I'm saying, where did the name slim shady from? Does
Speaker 2: anybody in the.
Speaker 3: Room now He's not.
Speaker 2: Says that it emerged from a moment of inspiration while
Speaker 2: he was on the toilet, setting that it just popped
Speaker 2: into his head and he immediately thought of rhymes for
Speaker 2: it while he was on the toilet. I came up
Speaker 2: with a lot of good ideas on the toilet. I
Speaker 2: mean the toilet. The toilet is a great place to think. Well,
Speaker 2: I can't see that song you love that man bad.
Speaker 2: I think I'll get you. I think, yeah, because Chicago,
Speaker 2: she can't go a day without breathing this man up.
Speaker 2: You need to become his pen pal. He's gonna get
Speaker 2: the little though and be like, you're too old.
Speaker 3: I'm not like, I'm not joining in on this party.
Speaker 2: No, I'm not doing it. Thirty discuss, You got a
Speaker 2: little fool. Okay. At this point they should know we
Speaker 2: have dark humor.
Speaker 1: Okay, but I will say, damn, I forgot what I
Speaker 1: was gonna say. No, we was talking about Eminem and
Speaker 1: I was saying no disrespect to that man.
Speaker 3: His music just didn't age well for me.
Speaker 2: You know what I'm saying. You don't got not one
Speaker 2: song beside Superman, I promise y'all.
Speaker 1: This is when I had to give up on eminem.
Speaker 1: It was like around that time where like they were
Speaker 1: doing like the BT ciphers and stuff. This man, I
Speaker 1: don't remember the bar before and I don't remember the
Speaker 1: bar after. But he said, that's an awfully hot coffee pot.
Speaker 2: I mean, okay, you cap you are so cap bro.
Speaker 2: Coffee pots do be hot, do they not?
Speaker 1: Girl?
Speaker 2: No, there's nothing so in the day. If you touching,
Speaker 2: you deserve to get burned. Is not talking about Okay,
Speaker 2: what was he talking about? I don't know, but it
Speaker 2: was that it did not eat. He said, I can't
Speaker 2: even get a yeah or who or a boo. Promise.
Speaker 2: He said that if you can't get a boo, you
Speaker 2: fuck girl. Y'all can get it me in a booth.
Speaker 1: So talking about, you know, the Atlanta days. But yes,
Speaker 1: I used to want to be in Atlanta so bad.
Speaker 1: But I used to want to be in Houston so bad.
Speaker 2: So are you?
Speaker 1: I was looking at y'all still tipping you.
Speaker 2: Wasn't looking at me? Yes, I want nowhere to be fine. Yeah,
Speaker 2: he was in class like this tipping. He was like,
Speaker 2: you was probably dancing just like that girl in front
Speaker 2: of that expedition. Why are you trying to be funny?
Speaker 2: That was my best friend cousin, Like, for real, I'm
Speaker 2: not even being funny. That was really her cousin. She
Speaker 2: was so proud. She was in Nabby. I don't know,
Speaker 2: she was so fish. She was very thick for the
Speaker 2: song shout out to her sickness. But she was definitely
Speaker 2: in that video. And then she was in that video
Speaker 2: with Webby and Buy and Bet she five foot seventh.
Speaker 2: Give me that, Yeah, give me that. She wasn't gimme
Speaker 2: that because my friend was so proud. She was like,
Speaker 2: oh my god, my cousin, she was instilled tipping, and
Speaker 2: now she in't give me that, and she couldn't wait
Speaker 2: to show me the video.
Speaker 1: Well, in her defense though, back then being a video bay.
Speaker 2: No, it was because I was like, oh my god.
Speaker 2: I was. I was like, oh my god, that is
Speaker 2: so crazy. I don't got no famous people in my family.
Speaker 2: I don't got no I did. I did think she
Speaker 2: was fighting. I was like, I have no famous people
Speaker 2: in my ma family.
Speaker 3: So you gotta think about it.
Speaker 2: Though.
Speaker 3: Being a video girl during those times was iconic.
Speaker 1: It was somebody had posted a clip of Big Boys video.
Speaker 1: I like the way you moved, Yes, and do y'all
Speaker 1: remember the girl that was standing with him, and she
Speaker 1: had the bikini on, and I never I didn't. Her
Speaker 1: name is Ka Toy. Of course y'all know I google everything,
Speaker 1: but I just remember.
Speaker 2: She had these legs.
Speaker 1: You could tell she worked out in this bubble butt
Speaker 1: in this small waist and it was like, oh my god,
Speaker 1: now she.
Speaker 2: Was doing She was that little CVD shite. Today we
Speaker 2: got fifty. I'm gonna make it feel the devil. You
Speaker 2: will not win. No, But for real, out of video
Speaker 2: girls did used to be fine. I mean they still
Speaker 2: be luky.
Speaker 1: No don't legs, they don't. They don't be cute deleting,
Speaker 1: all right.
Speaker 2: I think the problem is that everybody looks like the day.
Speaker 3: That's what I'm saying.
Speaker 2: Back in the day, like people were unique, looky like
Speaker 2: when I popped out that pool, I was a unique
Speaker 2: looking Okay, I was I was very unique. Oh my god,
Speaker 2: you really came up. I thought, waking through the outside
Speaker 2: may shout out to zero new talent when he saw it,
Speaker 2: I mean he was on something. The funny thing is
Speaker 2: that you really think about that type of stuff. So
Speaker 2: like Zero could tell people I had lex Peed in
Speaker 2: my video before she was lex Speed oscar. Yeah, like
Speaker 2: I had my promise.
Speaker 1: I'm gonna shout Zero and I'll be like, yeah, Zero
Speaker 1: gave me my first break, first big break. That was
Speaker 1: the first time I was like on not on camera,
Speaker 1: but like on a professional camera.
Speaker 2: Yeah. Thanks shout out to the people that believed in
Speaker 2: this before we believed in ourselves.
Speaker 3: What I'm saying humble beginning.
Speaker 2: Humble beginning, not really though, because it's humble beginnings being
Speaker 2: in the Zero video. Like humble beginning is when people
Speaker 2: be not lost in videos, for like artists that don't
Speaker 2: have no name.
Speaker 1: Yeah I almost say somebody's name, but I don't want
Speaker 1: to offend people.
Speaker 2: Who was you gonna say? When I think of like
Speaker 2: humble beginnings, I think of like if you were in
Speaker 2: my video, Yeah, like if you had a song, you
Speaker 2: you did have a song. Yeah, Lex had a song.
Speaker 2: So like if I would have been in Le's music video,
Speaker 2: that would have been a humble beginning. I was saying,
Speaker 2: like humble beginnings.
Speaker 1: I mean, it's just like being a video video girl
Speaker 1: is a humble beginning period.
Speaker 2: It doesn't matter who video you in. That's a humble beginning.
Speaker 2: I don't know, Big pimping don't sound that bad. That's
Speaker 2: a humble beginning. Though.
Speaker 1: If you imagine if you were in Big Pimping video
Speaker 1: and you go off to be an Oscar Award winning actress,
Speaker 1: that's a humble beginning because you used to just be
Speaker 1: on the yacht pop and pussy. You see what I'm saying.
Speaker 1: That's a humble beginning. I don't care who video it is.
Speaker 2: You're gonna be the first, I think, because I don't
Speaker 2: think it was anybody that was. I think somebody did
Speaker 2: videos before and they want to Oscar her.
Speaker 3: Yeah, I think we'll have to look into it.
Speaker 1: I'm pretty sure we can see Viola David somewhere doing something.
Speaker 2: I doubt, y, I highly doubt. Let me stop. I
Speaker 2: love you doubt that that lady was still cheaping anywhere.
Speaker 2: Why would you say that?
Speaker 1: I don't know because I love her so much, so
Speaker 1: I hope nobody sends that to her because it would
Speaker 1: break my heart.
Speaker 3: I would never want to offend her.
Speaker 2: I'm serious, No, because you about to offend her. I'm
Speaker 2: not because I said that because everybody was.
Speaker 1: Young once, and that's what I'm saying.
Speaker 2: We need to stop playing with that lady like this, okay,
Speaker 2: because that ain't plunny.
Speaker 3: It's not funny, but it's real.
Speaker 1: People had lies before you saw them be these great people.
Speaker 2: You know what I'm saying. But the beautiful thing about
Speaker 2: our generation is a lot of it was not documenting.
Speaker 2: I feel like the newer generation everything every Yeah, like
Speaker 2: I lived a lot of lives. Y'all don't know about
Speaker 2: it though.
Speaker 1: Snapchat got it? Thought of a lot of my stuff.
Speaker 2: Snapchat do got it?
Speaker 1: Sure. That's why I want to never delete my Snapchat.
Speaker 1: It's so many good videos on there.
Speaker 2: Oh my gosh. So real.
Speaker 1: Quick side note, So Ellen Pompeo just did call her daddy.
Speaker 2: Oh she did got out to Meredith Gray.
Speaker 3: Oh my gosh.
Speaker 1: And it was so funny because the reason I said, like,
Speaker 1: people have lives because she was talking about Serena and
Speaker 1: Cordell from Love Island and she was like, oh.
Speaker 2: That my people.
Speaker 1: Because it's like, you don't think that these people be
Speaker 1: tuned in and knowing what's going on. So That's why
Speaker 1: I said it's very possible that Valladay was possibly did
Speaker 1: the music video not necessarily.
Speaker 2: A rap video.
Speaker 1: It could have been jazz and blues classical. They have
Speaker 1: music videos, they do, yes, they do.
Speaker 2: Bb King had video.
Speaker 3: Bb King definitely had videos. I saw one.
Speaker 2: What was he doing in the video? You don't even
Speaker 2: play the flue? You just be lying for no reason.
Speaker 2: And you see how you be talking about you don't
Speaker 2: be lying no more. I was playing the flu.
Speaker 1: Bebe can't definitely have music videos, though, I think it
Speaker 1: was more so like.
Speaker 2: A Verry White dude. Oh you just keep oh, you
Speaker 2: just keep oh, you just.
Speaker 3: Keep telling me.
Speaker 2: I thought the record was skippy, and I was like, damn,
Speaker 2: chopped and screw baby, and he had that good healthy
Speaker 2: They had a parn and it was laid and curled tight.
Speaker 2: That was the first big fine had relax. That was
Speaker 2: the Barry White was.
Speaker 1: The first big nigga that was showing you, big niggas,
Speaker 1: I can we can get bitches too. I'm telling you
Speaker 1: he was the first big nigga that really had that
Speaker 1: swag for real. I'm telling you.
Speaker 2: Better listen to what I'm talking about now. Very White,
Speaker 2: I mean he was giving like nineteen seventies records.
Speaker 3: That's what I'm saying.
Speaker 1: That was before it wasn't No, this was before Biggie,
Speaker 1: This was before heavy D. This was before all that shit.
Speaker 1: Oh you just keep oh, but very hand.
Speaker 2: His wife was beautiful. Okay, we see, Yeah, you like that.
Speaker 2: That's why she had to turn her hand. You bless me.
Speaker 2: Imagine if you open the door your man say that,
Speaker 2: I'm probably closing. Oh you're not turn around. No, you
Speaker 2: not that. That's why are you saying that to me? Oh?
Speaker 2: You just keep up. No, I'm gonna keep on walking
Speaker 2: what I'm going man, excuse me. I've always said that
Speaker 2: I would like to date somebody that could sing. No
Speaker 2: I do. I think I would not not sing like that.
Speaker 1: No, No, I'm talking about I think people who can
Speaker 1: sing like you. I think people who can really sing,
Speaker 1: but like haven't made it to what they want to
Speaker 1: do if they want to.
Speaker 3: Be singers are so annoying.
Speaker 2: Oh why would I date somebody who haven't made it?
Speaker 1: Well, No, I'm saying, like say they have, they're successful
Speaker 1: in like whatever they do, but they're not a singer.
Speaker 3: But they want to know. They want everybody to know
Speaker 3: they can sing.
Speaker 2: No, if I'm a date a singer, I want to
Speaker 2: date a singer like somebody that actually really say the
Speaker 2: people that be like, oh, it's your birthday and they
Speaker 2: be like happy everybody like no, you're right though. People
Speaker 2: who can sing, who like never reach their full potential
Speaker 2: of singing this really do this all the time, just
Speaker 2: like the humming. They be like.
Speaker 3: Yeah.
Speaker 2: They be like, I get discovered because they don't know
Speaker 2: who around. Yeah, yeah, yeah, it really do be like that.
Speaker 2: But I'm not mad at it because I mean, you
Speaker 2: could get discovered that way. Hey, you never know the
Speaker 2: CEO of an A or A and R is in
Speaker 2: a room missed opportunity. I'm not gonna lie.
Speaker 1: I know people was losing the plot when we did
Speaker 1: the when.
Speaker 2: We did what's the Karaoke show we do?
Speaker 1: We just having fun and it was like people poor
Speaker 1: soul and they're not even contestant. It was like people
Speaker 1: in the audience afterwards like walking to us like singing, hey, hey,
Speaker 1: lex Man, listen, my baby mama, my baby mama.
Speaker 2: I'm gonna make you my wife.
Speaker 3: I said, sir, I can't help you.
Speaker 2: I can't what's interesting? I feel like things like that
Speaker 2: happened to you. I don't know why walk up. That's
Speaker 2: what you be talking about. You got that ear?
Speaker 1: Them in.
Speaker 2: Music? They want you to plug them. They said, she
Speaker 2: got that ear. This is my moment. This is my
Speaker 2: mom their moment to shine. Okay, this is the one time,
Speaker 2: the one chance that they gonna get to impress Lick Speed.
Speaker 2: And they don't know who you know? They said, Lou,
Speaker 2: I know a call and I can't get you know
Speaker 2: exactly exactly.
Speaker 1: Okay, let's move on. Let's get into the first topic.
Speaker 1: Go ahead, Drea, Okay, what's up y'all? Is your girl
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Speaker 2: Yeah, I'm drying the call and I'm lex C And
Speaker 2: together we are travelins from Charleston to the streets of Cardina.
Speaker 2: We're eating good.
Speaker 1: M M, drinking good tires, and experiencing the beauty of
Speaker 1: different cultures.
Speaker 3: It would be fun.
Speaker 1: It're taking me to incredible destinations with a special focus
Speaker 1: on the black experience.
Speaker 2: Still Queens One Glow, Endlessponsibility Travel Queens Serious premiere Wednesday,
Speaker 2: April twenty thirty eight on the topic. This has kind
Speaker 2: of been trending on social media, so we were like, cool,
Speaker 2: let's talk about it. Do y'all think that it's okay
Speaker 2: for parents to have their children pay bills while they're
Speaker 2: still living in their house. Like, if you get your
Speaker 2: first job and you're finally making some income, is it
Speaker 2: okay for your parents to give you the responsibility of
Speaker 2: paying a bill. Do you feel like it actually teaches
Speaker 2: the child responsibility or do you think that it's some bullshits,
Speaker 2: So cause, yeah, I know what I think. I feel like,
Speaker 2: when you get a job, I do believe.
Speaker 1: That your parents' responsibility to teach you the value of
Speaker 1: a dollar and how to manage your money, because I'm
Speaker 1: not gonna lie.
Speaker 3: My mom did not do that for me.
Speaker 1: So when I had a job, I've been working since
Speaker 1: I was fifteen, she us just let me have whatever
Speaker 1: and do whatever with my paycheck. She paid my phone bill,
Speaker 1: of course, everything. I never had to pay any bills.
Speaker 1: I didn't pay all of my bills one hundred percent
Speaker 1: by myself until I moved to Atlanta because even when
Speaker 1: I was in college, my mom was paying half of
Speaker 1: my rent, she was paying.
Speaker 3: My cell phone bill, all of that stuff.
Speaker 1: So while that did help me as far as I
Speaker 1: didn't have to stress about work so much because I
Speaker 1: was able to still have that college experience and stuff,
Speaker 1: it didn't teach me what I really needed to know
Speaker 1: about managing money. Yeah, so I feel like, I don't
Speaker 1: necessarily think you need to put that pressure on a
Speaker 1: child to pay a bill, but I think you need
Speaker 1: to show them how to save money. Okay, you know what,
Speaker 1: let me teach you about this. Put half of your
Speaker 1: paycheck right here, a thirty percent of your paycheck. Teach
Speaker 1: them money management. Don't just give your Let your kids
Speaker 1: take their paycheck and just do whatever with it. So
Speaker 1: I don't think necessarily they should be paying bills, but
Speaker 1: I think they.
Speaker 3: Need to learn about money management.
Speaker 2: Yeah, I agree. I definitely think that it's more so
Speaker 2: to me. You should be teaching your children how to say,
Speaker 2: how to in best like make them accountable for Okay,
Speaker 2: you get a paycheck every two weeks. Every two weeks
Speaker 2: when you get paid, you need to put five hundred
Speaker 2: dollars into a stock account because in ten years it's
Speaker 2: going to be quadruple that amount that can put in
Speaker 2: there that you invested in there. Like teach them the
Speaker 2: importance of things like that. But I just think asking
Speaker 2: your child to pay a bill, it's giving you short
Speaker 2: on the rentment. And I don't like that because I
Speaker 2: feel like children are supposed to be brought into the
Speaker 2: world because you want the child to be here. I
Speaker 2: just think putting responsibilities like that on them sometimes In
Speaker 2: a lot of ways, I think parents try to use
Speaker 2: their children to help them overcome struggles and stuff that
Speaker 2: they have going on, just like when parents be using
Speaker 2: their kids social Security numbers to put bills in their
Speaker 2: name and stuff like that. Oh, because I couldn't get
Speaker 2: it in my name, now I'm gonna put it in
Speaker 2: my child name. And then when your child turn eighteen
Speaker 2: and they're trying to get their first credit card or
Speaker 2: get their first apartment or whatever the case, maybe they
Speaker 2: credit is shite and they can't get shit in they
Speaker 2: name because you fucked they should. I think that that's
Speaker 2: fucked up, and I think, unfortunately, especially in a black community,
Speaker 2: a lot of parents do that. And they tried to
Speaker 2: play it off as Oh, I'm trying to teach you
Speaker 2: responsibility by getting you to pay the light billch No,
Speaker 2: this is your life, this is the lights in your home.
Speaker 2: I live here because you birth me. I didn't ask
Speaker 2: to be here. Why should I have to pay a
Speaker 2: light bill? You know what I mean? I do feel
Speaker 2: like you're right as far as not fucking your money off, Yeah,
Speaker 2: every week, because my mom definitely when I got a job,
Speaker 2: hear and my dad they didn't make me pay no bills. Well,
Speaker 2: I definitely just used to do what I wanted with
Speaker 2: my money too, And I feel like it didn't teach
Speaker 2: me any type of responsibility. It's other ways that you
Speaker 2: could teach your children responsibility when it comes to their money,
Speaker 2: outside of having them pay your household bills for you.
Speaker 1: So, how do y'all feel about when that child eighteen though,
Speaker 1: and they're still in their parents' home, do you think
Speaker 1: they should be helping then? If they're graduate, if they're
Speaker 1: out of high school, and.
Speaker 3: If they're in college or not in college.
Speaker 1: If they're eighteen, they're out of high school and now
Speaker 1: they're technically an adult and they're still in their parents' house,
Speaker 1: should they be helping with the bills?
Speaker 2: I think it depended on the circumstance, like what are
Speaker 2: you doing? Are you working? Are you trying to figure
Speaker 2: out what you want to do with your life? Are
Speaker 2: you in school? If you're in school, I'm not going
Speaker 2: to ask you to pay for anything. But if you
Speaker 2: think you just about to be in my house with
Speaker 2: no plan, doing nothing, then yeah, you gonna have to
Speaker 2: contribute some kind of way. Because you're grown now and
Speaker 2: living here. Having to help pay a bill is better
Speaker 2: than you having to go get your own apartment and
Speaker 2: pay for everything. But if you have a plan, you
Speaker 2: in school, you going to a trade school. Excuse me,
Speaker 2: you're trying to figure out what you want to do
Speaker 2: with your life. I'm not going to make you pay
Speaker 2: for anything, cause you're trying to figure it out and
Speaker 2: life is hard enough. What you think, sal Yeah, I
Speaker 2: was gonna say, I agree. I feel like if they're
Speaker 2: if I'm in college and I'm just coming home on
Speaker 2: holidays maybe the summer, maybe it's my responsibility to get
Speaker 2: a job so I can pay for gas or help
Speaker 2: around the house. But having a bill for that child,
Speaker 2: I think you should just be able to set them
Speaker 2: up so that they have they're able to save their money.
Speaker 2: Again to your point, making sure they know what to
Speaker 2: do with it, how to save it, but not necessarily
Speaker 2: putting things in their name and having these big grown
Speaker 2: up responsibilities until it's that time.
Speaker 3: If you're living.
Speaker 2: There three sixty five all year, you're not going to school, Yeah,
Speaker 2: you need to get a job and you need to
Speaker 2: definitely be helping out around here.
Speaker 1: So I do think too, it's crazy because I always
Speaker 1: regret not paying attention in school. I had a teacher,
Speaker 1: it was I think my geography teacher. He took one
Speaker 1: not semester, but like a six week period, we didn't
Speaker 1: learn any geography.
Speaker 2: He took that whole six week period to teach.
Speaker 1: Us about stocks, and I remember none of us were
Speaker 1: paying attention.
Speaker 3: We were just like, why do we need to learn this?
Speaker 1: And I feel as an adult as thirty five years
Speaker 1: old now I'm thinking back to my sixteen year old
Speaker 1: So I'm.
Speaker 3: Like, girl, why you did and listen?
Speaker 1: Because imagine if I would have listened and just took
Speaker 1: a little fifty dollars from my paycheck and figured out
Speaker 1: how to Oh, mom, can I do this? But again,
Speaker 1: my mom didn't know about you know, stocks and bonds
Speaker 1: and things like that.
Speaker 3: So I think a lot.
Speaker 1: Of the time we need to switch up the curriculum
Speaker 1: in the schools. I think there's a lot of things
Speaker 1: like why, And I think I've said this before. Why
Speaker 1: am I learning about credit when I turn eighteen?
Speaker 2: Why am I?
Speaker 1: Why are kids learning that their credit is shot because
Speaker 1: this and that happened to them. They don't even know
Speaker 1: nothing about credit? Why don't we know how to purchase properties?
Speaker 1: That these are all life skills that we need to learn.
Speaker 1: We should know about taxes, stocks and bond We should
Speaker 1: learn about all this stuff like skills that we're actually
Speaker 1: gonna need as adults. So unfortunately, in the black community,
Speaker 1: I feel like they can only teach us so much
Speaker 1: because a lot of it's a lot of financial literacy
Speaker 1: in our community, because unfortunately, my mom didn't teach me
Speaker 1: these things because she probably really didn't know. My mom
Speaker 1: was fortunate enough to have an amazing job, so she
Speaker 1: made a lot of money. And you know, when my
Speaker 1: dad passed, he left her a lot of money, so
Speaker 1: she was able. She was just not lucky, but that's
Speaker 1: the cards that she was dealt.
Speaker 3: So we were always just taken care of.
Speaker 1: But if my mom would have liked something would have happened,
Speaker 1: if she would have lost her job or something like that,
Speaker 1: she probably would.
Speaker 3: Have known what to do, you know what I'm saying.
Speaker 1: And I feel like we really have to teach our
Speaker 1: youth about managing money because a lot of times their
Speaker 1: parents don't know and they do need to help.
Speaker 3: And not saying that it's right or that it's wrong.
Speaker 1: But that's why it's like we don't know nothing about
Speaker 1: generation No. Well, you know, you see us having these
Speaker 1: conversations about fifty to fifty. Why are we talking about
Speaker 1: fifty fifty when we need to talk about how can
Speaker 1: we pass this on to our kids and we can
Speaker 1: build something together. Y'all talking about splitting rent? Who cares
Speaker 1: who pays the bills? Bro, let's get the bills paid,
Speaker 1: but let's invest in something, Let's save something. Who All
Speaker 1: these conversations are so silly, and even us we have
Speaker 1: indulging these conversations before. But like I said, as I
Speaker 1: get older, I realized, there is a bigger picture here
Speaker 1: that we are all missing.
Speaker 3: You are if your purpose is telling your.
Speaker 1: Child, hey, pay the light bill because you don't got it,
Speaker 1: that's different from hey, put it on this light bill
Speaker 1: because I'm trying to show you, or you know, whatever
Speaker 1: the case may be. So I feel like, no matter
Speaker 1: what you're doing with that money.
Speaker 2: Yeah, because then I was gonna say, or maybe you
Speaker 2: could be telling them that, But then the whole time,
Speaker 2: you're creating an account for them, and then when they
Speaker 2: turn eighteen or when they turn twenty one, you're giving
Speaker 2: the money back to them. Right, the purpose was to
Speaker 2: teach them responsibility exactly, But I just think, yeah, using
Speaker 2: the money to pay your bills as a parent, that's
Speaker 2: just crazy. Wow to crazy? But do y'all think that
Speaker 2: a lot of parents do that to try to teach
Speaker 2: their children like teamwork and family responsibility.
Speaker 1: Now, I do think, you know, things are different, cause,
Speaker 1: like I said, financially right now, we are in a
Speaker 1: very very tough economy. And you know, if you do
Speaker 1: have a household, if you have like you know, a
Speaker 1: single mom or a single dad, and you have a
Speaker 1: child that's sixteen seventeen and they are working, you know,
Speaker 1: if you even if they're only taking two hundred dollars
Speaker 1: from the kid, that probably would help, you know, if
Speaker 1: that's somebody who's not making a lot of money. So
Speaker 1: I think it could be a good lesson in that
Speaker 1: as well, contribute, to learn how to contribute and not
Speaker 1: just being for self. But like I said, it's a
Speaker 1: very thin line with that. It's a very fucking thin
Speaker 1: line because I am all for community and helping each other,
Speaker 1: but I'm also not for a sixteen year old stressing
Speaker 1: themselves out to pay bills.
Speaker 2: That's what I was gonna say. I just feel like,
Speaker 2: as a teenager, why am I responsible for the family?
Speaker 3: Right right?
Speaker 2: Right? You know? And unfortunately that kind of goes back
Speaker 2: into what I was saying earlier. I really wish it's
Speaker 2: kind of off topic, but I feel like sometimes people
Speaker 2: be having children to help them help with other and
Speaker 2: help them help with like family responsibilities. So that shouldn't
Speaker 2: be the reason why you having a child and bringing
Speaker 2: a child into these worlds. It's to help you with
Speaker 2: where you're lacking.
Speaker 1: And I think that's what a lot that we're missing
Speaker 1: in the black community. I feel like that's why we
Speaker 1: need family units again.
Speaker 3: Yeah, you know what I'm saying.
Speaker 1: We used to have neighborhoods where neighbors helping everybody, pitching it,
Speaker 1: you know, like it takes a village. We don't have
Speaker 1: villages no more. You know how many times I get
Speaker 1: online and I see a woman or a man crime
Speaker 1: because they don't have any help, Like what happened to community? Like,
Speaker 1: I'm not gonna lie y'all. Growing up in my neighborhood,
Speaker 1: my mom sometimes would have to leave for work, but
Speaker 1: we had our neighbors were right there and they'd be like, hey,
Speaker 1: if y'all need anything, come over, and they would come over,
Speaker 1: knock on the door, y'all good. You know, they would
Speaker 1: order pizza for us and make sure we straight. But
Speaker 1: it was a neighborhood like everybody knew each other, you
Speaker 1: know what I'm saying. It was like it was really
Speaker 1: taking a village even now our neighbor because like, you know,
Speaker 1: my mom has passed away, so my neighbors on the
Speaker 1: other side, they have literally turned their camera to my
Speaker 1: mom's house just to make sure nobody breaks in the
Speaker 1: house or no, you know what I'm saying. So it's
Speaker 1: like they're like, Okay, we making sure that nobody comes
Speaker 1: in the house since nobody's there anymore. So I feel
Speaker 1: like that sense of neighborhood of helping each other out
Speaker 1: is very important. But that's why a lot of these
Speaker 1: parents are relying on.
Speaker 2: Their kids, cause people don't help folks out no more.
Speaker 3: It's a lot of shame. It's a lot of shame of.
Speaker 1: Well, you didn't do good in life and you're only
Speaker 1: making minimum wage and you and you know, it's a
Speaker 1: lot of shame in that too.
Speaker 3: So I think it's a lot.
Speaker 2: Yeah, But I just feel like, if you don't know
Speaker 2: how to handle your money, you need to learn how
Speaker 2: to handle your money. You don't need to put the
Speaker 2: responsibility off on other people. Because I feel like if
Speaker 2: you're putting a responsibility off on other people to help
Speaker 2: you every time you get in a buying where's the
Speaker 2: listening being learned as an adult as I've grown up
Speaker 2: adult as a parent. If you are always counting on
Speaker 2: other people to help you, you're never going to who
Speaker 2: learned the importance of saving, investing all of these things yourself,
Speaker 2: or just not living above your means. I hate to
Speaker 2: say stuff like these cause I feel like it's a
Speaker 2: little bit harsh, but like back in the day, people
Speaker 2: was having thirteen kids fourteen keys because the cost of
Speaker 2: living was cheap. It's hell, Like no, literally, the cost
Speaker 2: of living was so fucking cheap, Like you could literally
Speaker 2: feed a family of ten. You can go get some
Speaker 2: steaks for like twenty dollars and it will feed a
Speaker 2: family of ten for like two weeks, you know what
Speaker 2: I mean. That's just not how things are anymore. So
Speaker 2: I feel like, also, if you can't afford to take
Speaker 2: care of all of these kids, why are you having
Speaker 2: all of these kids?
Speaker 3: And that's a sensitive topic.
Speaker 2: Too, it is, and I understand that it is, but
Speaker 2: like even I'm just looking at it from a standpoint
Speaker 2: of like my mom, like I said, my parents didn't
Speaker 2: make me pay any bills when I got a job,
Speaker 2: My money was just for me. They still paid my
Speaker 2: car note, they still paid my cell phone bill. I
Speaker 2: think I did start paying my cell phone bill like
Speaker 2: my senior year high school. But my parents paid all
Speaker 2: of my bills. But my mom said, the reason that
Speaker 2: she wanted to be that way with me is because
Speaker 2: her dad was not that way with them. My grandfather,
Speaker 2: he actually owned a whole bunch of restaurants in Houston
Speaker 2: back in the day, like in like the seventies, sixties
Speaker 2: and seventies and eighties, and of course my mom and
Speaker 2: all her siblings would work at the restaurants. And she
Speaker 2: basically was telling me like, he didn't used to pay them,
Speaker 2: and when he did used to pay them, like and
Speaker 2: they used to work part time hours, twenty hours, thirty
Speaker 2: hours a week. He didn't used to pay them because
Speaker 2: he felt like y' all my kids, of course y'all
Speaker 2: gonna work here. And then when he did pay them,
Speaker 2: my mom said, they used to have to help him
Speaker 2: pay the bills. And so as soon as all of
Speaker 2: them turned eighteen, they hauled ass and got the heel
Speaker 2: up out the house. They didn't want to stay there
Speaker 2: no more because it's like, yeah, because it's crazy. And
Speaker 2: I said that to say, but my mom also had
Speaker 2: a big family, like it was like six of them
Speaker 2: so all together in the household. Then with my grandparents,
Speaker 2: a's eight people. Why you had six kids and you
Speaker 2: couldn't take care of I just kind of be looking
Speaker 2: at stuff like that too, because it's not your children responsibility,
Speaker 2: Like you decided to start these restaurants. And I love
Speaker 2: my green daddy Rip damn. Yeah. I mean he died
Speaker 2: at an old age though, like he didn't die young.
Speaker 2: He was like eighty five, right, okay, okay, But I
Speaker 2: loved my grandaddy. He was super sweet before what my
Speaker 2: mom to me before when my mom used to tell
Speaker 2: me he was something else when they was like growing up.
Speaker 2: And I just think that that is a crazy responsibility
Speaker 2: to put off on your children. I started these businesses,
Speaker 2: these businesses are not flourishing the way that I would
Speaker 2: like them to, or I can't afford to hire the
Speaker 2: appropriate help, so I'm just gonna have my kids work
Speaker 2: here and not pay them.
Speaker 1: I also think too, now we also have access to
Speaker 1: a lot of knowledge that we weren't able to know
Speaker 1: about in when your mom was younger, and right, there's
Speaker 1: a lot of information. You know, there used to be
Speaker 1: the same and I don't want to fee anybody.
Speaker 3: But it was real.
Speaker 1: There was like, if this is a black community, black
Speaker 1: people talking to other black people, They're like, if you
Speaker 1: want a high something from black people, put it in
Speaker 1: the book. You know what I'm saying, because they knew,
Speaker 1: like we would just go off of whatever and just
Speaker 1: believe whatever people told us.
Speaker 2: But it's crazy because at one point we used to
Speaker 2: love to read because we could eat like it was forbidding, right, right.
Speaker 1: So I think now the fact that we have access
Speaker 1: to I mean, there's so many young women, young men
Speaker 1: on the internet that literally teach you, Hey, if you
Speaker 1: only have X, y Z to invest or save, let
Speaker 1: me show you how to do it.
Speaker 3: Let me show you how to make your money grow.
Speaker 1: That's how I started saving my money. Like when I
Speaker 1: started making money, I said, I don't want to lose
Speaker 1: this money. So what happens if you know, knock on wood,
Speaker 1: poor minds falls apart. How can I make sure if
Speaker 1: I have no income coming in that I can.
Speaker 2: Last for at least a year or two and be straight.
Speaker 1: I got on YouTube, you know, I did some research.
Speaker 1: I talked to people. So the fact that we have
Speaker 1: access to things. So I know a lot of y'all
Speaker 1: listening like, okay, but you know, if I'm you know,
Speaker 1: working from paycheck to paycheck, I under I do under
Speaker 1: staying that, but coming from somebody who was working from
Speaker 1: paycheck to paycheck, and I figured it out. And even
Speaker 1: though I was looking, I had three dollars, I did,
Speaker 1: but I was learning how to take my money and
Speaker 1: invest a little bit of money I did have into
Speaker 1: my business and little and taking little things here and there.
Speaker 1: There are small things that you can do. But we
Speaker 1: have access to so much information, y'all.
Speaker 2: We really really do.
Speaker 1: And I truly believe that we are now in the
Speaker 1: day and age where anything has always been possible, but
Speaker 1: today anything is possible. You have people online who are
Speaker 1: learning how to do digital marketing who don't know nothing
Speaker 1: about a computer, but they.
Speaker 3: Just sat there and figured it out.
Speaker 1: You got people who do day trading who didn't know
Speaker 1: how to do it, but they figured it out and
Speaker 1: they're literally, you know, making a thousand dollars a day
Speaker 1: figuring all that stuff out. So I think, if you
Speaker 1: have the time and the patience and you really are
Speaker 1: thirsty for knowledge, you can do better for your household
Speaker 1: to create something that's long lasting. Because one thing my
Speaker 1: mom said to me, though she always said, I didn't
Speaker 1: do everything right, but I'm gonna make sure you get
Speaker 1: it right, you know what I'm saying. That's what I
Speaker 1: always tell people that Lexp went through that, so you
Speaker 1: ain't got to go through that.
Speaker 3: Yeah.
Speaker 2: So I don't think you should make your kids pay bills.
Speaker 2: I don't think so either. And I think like, if
Speaker 2: you are going through a financial hardship, are you going
Speaker 2: through something and you do have to ask your kids
Speaker 2: to help you with something that's understandable because it's like
Speaker 2: if it's between the lights getting turned off, are you
Speaker 2: asking your kid, can you please help me Patty's bill?
Speaker 2: That's fine, but I feel like you should definitely get
Speaker 2: him back the money. Oh yeah, yeah, when you get
Speaker 2: back on your fee, you should get him the two
Speaker 2: hundred dollars big or they three hundred dollars big. And
Speaker 2: I was just gonna say, I know that that is
Speaker 2: a touchy subject when we start talking about like how
Speaker 2: many kids people are having and stuff like that, But
Speaker 2: I don't know. I'm just a very strong advocate for
Speaker 2: children are not your child is not supposed to come
Speaker 2: into this world and be responsible for you or live
Speaker 2: a life of struggle.
Speaker 1: No, And I said that because I know it's a
Speaker 1: sense of subject.
Speaker 2: But I agree with you.
Speaker 1: Yeah, because I remember one time your best friend Lean
Speaker 1: had tweeted something, Oh, I'm not gonna beat.
Speaker 2: Yeah, but Len is crazy.
Speaker 1: But i mean everybody was just eating her up, and
Speaker 1: I'm like, why are y'all doing her? She's right?
Speaker 2: Am? I feel like, if.
Speaker 1: You are not comfortable yourself and you are waking up
Speaker 1: and you were crying and you were struggling, why would
Speaker 1: you want to bring a child into that.
Speaker 2: Yeah, I just don't understand.
Speaker 1: I'm not saying that you gotta be a millionaire, right,
Speaker 1: you at least have a community around you. I mean,
Speaker 1: things happen, Accidents happen. I'm not saying that, and I'm
Speaker 1: not I just think that.
Speaker 3: We should be careful.
Speaker 2: I mean because it's because this is a thing too.
Speaker 2: Like you said, sometimes things happen. And I can understand. Okay,
Speaker 2: you get pregnant, you like I'm pregnant. I love the
Speaker 2: person that I'm we I'm gonna have the baby. Having five, though,
Speaker 2: is a choice when your situation have been changed having one, Okay,
Speaker 2: I get it, having five out and you still in
Speaker 2: the same situation and you still struggling. I just feel
Speaker 2: like that's like a choice. And then when your children
Speaker 2: get old enough to work, you're expecting them to contribute
Speaker 2: to the household. Like, no, this is never gonna see
Speaker 2: right with my and I don't really care who would
Speaker 2: have been right. And that's why I said, speaking of
Speaker 2: because don't do your keys.
Speaker 1: Like getting pregnant and stuff like that in the black community.
Speaker 1: I want y'all, before y'all be eating us up, just
Speaker 1: stay tuned to the bed topic today because I'm gonna
Speaker 1: tell y'all why things y'all are worried about the wrong things.
Speaker 3: But we're gonna get med to that later. So all
Speaker 3: in all, I.
Speaker 1: Think we all agree, Yeah, teach your kids money management,
Speaker 1: but stop making them pay.
Speaker 2: Your bill's strife absolutely.
Speaker 3: Okay, all right, Tom, what we drinking today?
Speaker 2: Okay? So this is our solo episode and we've had
Speaker 2: a lot of guests. Yes, we're gonna call this one
Speaker 2: the Girl's Girl, all right, cause we're behind here, all right.
Speaker 2: So for this one, you can do any spirit of choice.
Speaker 2: You can keep it a mocktail, or make it into
Speaker 2: a cocktail. I've added some passion fruit. We have a
Speaker 2: little bit of grapefruit, a little bit of lemon. I
Speaker 2: made a bagel, honey, a little bit of ginger beer,
Speaker 2: and then I used honey mango. So it's really good.
Speaker 2: It was a little bit tard. I don't know, it
Speaker 2: wasn't ripe enough good, but it was really good. I
Speaker 2: really thought y'all would like it because it has that
Speaker 2: tartness to it, and I think it goes really well
Speaker 2: with the passion fruit and a grapefruit too. This mango
Speaker 2: is juicy as hair. Yes, that's the honey mango garnish.
Speaker 2: The honey mango is garnish. And then a little bit
Speaker 2: of basil in there, just to get a little give
Speaker 2: it a little color to it. Oh but oh, you
Speaker 2: just I see what you mean by the tartness. So
Speaker 2: my eyes, it's good though, So we're gonna play with
Speaker 2: that a little bit more. But that this is the
Speaker 2: girl's girl. Thank you. Gus. Of course, realm another little
Speaker 2: CBD shops. I know you was cursing a lot.
Speaker 1: He was like, because, motherfucker, because fuck that, because the
Speaker 1: fucking motherfucker.
Speaker 2: When the fu fucking it. Fucked, it got fucked on
Speaker 2: the to be like bleed bleed, bleed bleed. I'm sorry,
Speaker 2: and I didn't realize that I had some potty mouth.
Speaker 2: You couldn't weigh an episode normally because normally I be
Speaker 2: trying to wait until like the five minutes past. You
Speaker 2: couldn't wait to be working booty by, say Booty Park College.
Speaker 2: That's what they're laying. It is low.
Speaker 1: It is the booty parks. This lady that walks around midtown. Okay,
Speaker 1: you know what I'm talking about. Maybe she got the
Speaker 1: biggest wagon I have ever seen, and she be walking fast.
Speaker 2: Where does she be going? So she's usually around the.
Speaker 1: Target said, it's me surprised she'd be walking around like target,
Speaker 1: the target area. And I mean that thing is so
Speaker 1: and she'd be walking fast.
Speaker 2: Yeah, she walks really fast.
Speaker 3: She has headphones on.
Speaker 1: She's always in like a T shirt, some you know,
Speaker 1: workout pants see all the time.
Speaker 2: And that booty is just so rotan. I love a
Speaker 2: rotund booty.
Speaker 3: It's so rotun.
Speaker 1: But like shout out to huhout out.
Speaker 2: To the queen. In meantime, shout out of it. Oh,
Speaker 2: y'all said that on this song, it's me surprise. Why
Speaker 2: did he say that? Do you ever just be listening
Speaker 2: to the.
Speaker 1: Songs sometimes with surprise. Jock's first album was a masterpiece,
Speaker 1: and he was robbed of the Grammys he deserved.
Speaker 2: Now he definitely deserves some Grammys for that. It was.
Speaker 2: It was definitely a mess. I'm trying to We gotta
Speaker 2: stop cussing so much. We never gonna become a We
Speaker 2: never gonna become legit say nigga and pussy too much.
Speaker 2: Oh my gosh, we are to cross over, but that
Speaker 2: be leg saying but busy.
Speaker 1: Bussy is a crossover word though, that in the other community,
Speaker 1: because you know, we said, we're trying to bring in
Speaker 1: the latinas the White, the Indians. We want everybody to
Speaker 1: tune in. Bussy is a universal word that that is
Speaker 1: in the LGBTQ community. They all use it.
Speaker 2: I say bussy occasionally, like when it's feeding for the topic.
Speaker 2: You'll just be saying bussy just to say busy. I
Speaker 2: think you like mine. It's like, I'm not mad at
Speaker 2: it because I know what it represents. And no, Miguel
Speaker 2: didn't say bussy. He said, tell me that that pussy
Speaker 2: is mine.
Speaker 3: The p word is not universal.
Speaker 2: Though I like the p words, some people don't like
Speaker 2: I don't like it. I like it pussy that pussy
Speaker 2: real not that all out too. But yeah, I don't
Speaker 2: know bussy is universal. I understand what it represents, and
Speaker 2: I'm glad that they have a word to represent what
Speaker 2: they needed to represent. I don't like it, though I
Speaker 2: do bussy. It's remind me too much of buto. And
Speaker 2: then so when I think of butdh sy, I think
Speaker 2: of something that's stained. And I know all bussies don't stain,
Speaker 2: don't I know all?
Speaker 3: Have you ever smelled the bussy?
Speaker 2: I smelled my bussy? You gotta everyone has a bussy
Speaker 2: if you're using it for their purpose. I mean I
Speaker 2: do have.
Speaker 1: I'm saying, have you ever smelt somebody else's bussy?
Speaker 2: Perhaps?
Speaker 1: Never mind, I don't know why that it was a girl.
Speaker 1: I don't care if it was a girl.
Speaker 2: A burrol, I feel like I had to clarify. I'm
Speaker 2: just this is not a burrel. I've never slept with
Speaker 2: a burrel. Oh my gosh, what do we call a burrow?
Speaker 2: On our show? Okay? Rolling rolling up? Okay, come back
Speaker 2: on the show. I can say I've never slept with
Speaker 2: a burrow a shim.
Speaker 3: I think shim is actually offensive.
Speaker 2: You think so, I think they.
Speaker 1: I think like burrel is cute and funny, but I
Speaker 1: think that that one is like because people use that
Speaker 1: to be offensive. Really this women and sis men assistment.
Speaker 2: See, I didn't think that. So I apologize if that's
Speaker 2: an offensive word or direction. I don't know if I
Speaker 2: just made that up as well. Okay, see you apologizing it.
Speaker 2: You don't even know. But no, because I said that. Yeah,
Speaker 2: I don't mind apologizing because I don't want to offend anybody.
Speaker 2: But I said it because when I think of shim,
Speaker 2: I just think of like she and him mixed together,
Speaker 2: just like girls boy and girl mixed together.
Speaker 1: But I feel like, I know I'm but I'm not
Speaker 1: trying to be funny. I feel like I've seen a
Speaker 1: comment or something that somebody said it was offensive, but
Speaker 1: I don't know if that person was offended or it
Speaker 1: was offending the community, you know, gotty gotty, Well, I'm
Speaker 1: just like a difference with like the E R and
Speaker 1: the A.
Speaker 2: Mmm. You know, and that bothers me too, because people
Speaker 2: love to think that that word is universal and it
Speaker 2: is indeed not what A or E R both. Yeah,
Speaker 2: you shouldn't be saying none of them if you look
Speaker 2: like this, you know I love her? Good? Yeah, why
Speaker 2: are you saying it?
Speaker 3: They want to say it bad, too.
Speaker 2: Real bad, And that may even go for some of
Speaker 2: our mulatto brothers and sisters. Y'all should not say it either,
Speaker 2: because if we can't look at you until you just
Speaker 2: shouldn't say you should just not say.
Speaker 3: Brothers and sisters.
Speaker 2: You know, I agree, because I feel like if I
Speaker 2: have to look at you and be like, are you
Speaker 2: sure you can say that, just don't say ah, don't
Speaker 2: say it.
Speaker 1: Yeah, it's it's but you know what, I'm getting to
Speaker 1: that age where I like, I don't know, like I
Speaker 1: am trying to really remove it from my vocabulary.
Speaker 2: Me too, That's what I was saying. I really, I
Speaker 2: can't wait till the day that we just don't say
Speaker 2: that word anymore on the shop, you know what. I've
Speaker 2: already had for a time.
Speaker 1: I know, but you know, it's actually harder for me
Speaker 1: not to say now it's not.
Speaker 2: The A, S, E R no, because you have a problem.
Speaker 2: I do, because I've never used the hardy do I
Speaker 2: use it a lot.
Speaker 3: You know that's me and Laura.
Speaker 2: It's too traumatizing.
Speaker 3: You know that's me and Lauren's nicknames for each other.
Speaker 2: I know, hey, little yeah, y'all be calling each other day.
Speaker 2: Y'all are so weird. You, you and Lauren are so strange.
Speaker 1: That when we entered the phone and wrong, she'd be like,
Speaker 1: I don't know. I think I just felt like I
Speaker 1: took the power back.
Speaker 2: You didn't take the power back, so like, I feel
Speaker 2: like it is so offensive to our incenses. They fought
Speaker 2: so hard for us to not be called no.
Speaker 1: They fought hard for our freedom to do what we
Speaker 1: want and to live on.
Speaker 2: This be called that anymore. But I took the I'm
Speaker 2: not letting nobody else call me that. I'm letting my move.
Speaker 2: What you're gonna do if they do, they're gonna start
Speaker 2: laughing at your ass because they don't gonna be scared.
Speaker 2: You don't tap your feet like that.
Speaker 1: It's gonna distract them.
Speaker 2: I hope you steal off on them. Why you're doing that,
Speaker 2: because that's that is a good distructions that. Imagine somebody
Speaker 2: doing that and you looking down at the steal off
Speaker 2: like I'm doing that. What are y'all gonna come from
Speaker 2: the side, y'all, I'm not coming. I'm not gonna started
Speaker 2: doing that. Ain't they called you that? If anything, I'm
Speaker 2: gonna tap my feet. So somebody called me the N word.
Speaker 2: You wouldn't get out there with me. I would tap
Speaker 2: my feet. Why you come from Okay, either white? We
Speaker 2: in this together. And then once you got them down,
Speaker 2: once you knock them down, me and I'll probably were together.
Speaker 2: You gotta them together. You don't worry. God, I got
Speaker 2: your man, That's what I'm saying. But then afterwards, I
Speaker 2: would give you a last she.
Speaker 3: Now that's race.
Speaker 2: Doctor Umar say that one thousand last years. I would
Speaker 2: give you one thousand last years after because you be
Speaker 2: saying it. That's why they probably thought they could.
Speaker 1: Say you have said it on poor mind, you.
Speaker 2: Have said the herd e R. I would go find
Speaker 2: the club and I would get inserty hobby inserted right
Speaker 2: We're gonna get flat, We're gonna get bleeve the er
Speaker 2: but inserted right here. Okay, let's this show is sponsored
Speaker 2: by Better Health. What's up y'all? As your girl XP
Speaker 2: and it's your girl draining the call.
Speaker 1: And y'all know we swear by this and we absolutely
Speaker 1: love therapy. And this is your sign to sign up
Speaker 1: for therapy at betterhelp dot com. Yes, y'all, it is
Speaker 1: mental health Awareness month, so you need to go to therapy.
Speaker 1: A recent survey at twenty six percent of Americans d
Speaker 1: said that they have not seeked out therapy. That is
Speaker 1: so crazy, y'all, go to therapy especial she will better help.
Speaker 2: It's no excuse. It's really affordable, it's easy to access,
Speaker 2: and if you need to change therapists, they make it
Speaker 2: easy to do it and you can access it from
Speaker 2: wherever you are.
Speaker 3: Yes, it's entirely online.
Speaker 1: So all you gonna do is go to better help
Speaker 1: dot com backslash poor Minds and you'll get ten percent
Speaker 1: off of your first month.
Speaker 3: That's better help.
Speaker 1: H g LP dot com backslash poor Minds.
Speaker 2: We're all better with help.
Speaker 1: Visit betterhelp dot com slash poor Minds to get ten
Speaker 1: percent off of your first month.
Speaker 2: That's better help.
Speaker 3: H g LP dot com Slash poor Minds.
Speaker 2: What's up y'all? At Your Girl XP and it's your
Speaker 2: Girl Draining the Call and we have.
Speaker 1: A very exciting announcement today.
Speaker 3: We have a brand new show dropping.
Speaker 2: Yes, we have a brand new show dropping y'all on Patreon.
Speaker 2: It's gonna air on September second, and it's called Poor Chronicles.
Speaker 2: We're gonna be doing so much stuff on there. We're
Speaker 2: gonna be doing challenges. If you can't go to Bell
Speaker 2: and che where the hell could you go? If you
Speaker 2: can't go to Bell on Noche? What the hell we're
Speaker 2: gonna be doing? Talk to me, chit chat with me.
Speaker 2: He's gonna be speeling a little tea. Oh my god,
Speaker 2: No you didn't. God, everything y'all been wanting to see,
Speaker 2: We're gonna be doing it right here on Patreon.
Speaker 1: Yes, y'all ask us for so much. Well, we've been
Speaker 1: to give it to y'all every single Monday, and it's
Speaker 1: gonna be a time. Y'all know Poor Minds has grown
Speaker 1: into its own little entity. Well, we're gonna have a
Speaker 1: lot of fun still over here at Poor Chronicles. So
Speaker 1: make sure y'all tune in September second.
Speaker 3: It's going down.
Speaker 1: Thanks having your friends back and fighting with your friends.
Speaker 1: We want to talk about constantly being your friends therapists
Speaker 1: while they're in a toxic relationship.
Speaker 2: Please pass the my tomato. Tomato.
Speaker 3: We don't like that.
Speaker 2: No, after a while. No, in the beginning years, for sure,
Speaker 2: everybody need a soundboard, everybody needs somebody to be to.
Speaker 2: Everybody needs somebody to talk to. But after a while, though,
Speaker 2: if you are still in a toxic situation, or you're
Speaker 2: complaining about this person all the time, but you don't
Speaker 2: want to leave, especially if it's not like.
Speaker 1: A, I don't want to leave it, leave it.
Speaker 2: It was good? Because what made him go in the
Speaker 2: studio that day, if they stacked to hold your down?
Speaker 2: But what made him say, I ain't my leave it.
Speaker 1: I'm afraid on your neck for the rest of your life.
Speaker 1: Ho and me, it's not good. It's never been good.
Speaker 2: When we really think about it, and we're not. Maybe
Speaker 2: we'll get into this for the bop signy, but Trey
Speaker 2: songs you just said a few questionable things. Get into
Speaker 2: that anyway if you don't want to. But if you yeah,
Speaker 2: if you don't want to leave the situation, especially if
Speaker 2: it's not like ZV. I don't want to hear about
Speaker 2: these because I can understand when women be in domestic
Speaker 2: abuse and violent situations where they be afraid for their life.
Speaker 2: Believe that's completely different. That's not what we're talking about.
Speaker 2: I'm talking about you just being a stupid bed and
Speaker 2: you just want to talk to me about it all
Speaker 2: the time. After a year or two that you've been
Speaker 2: with these persons, I have ran out of my capacity
Speaker 2: to listen. I truly have. And I feel like for
Speaker 2: some people that's probably gonna sound a little harsh, but
Speaker 2: I think that these days that's what we have therapies for.
Speaker 2: You should us talk to your therapies because as a friend,
Speaker 2: and I feel like lex kin ofticities, you can come
Speaker 2: and talk to me about stuff, and I'm gonna try
Speaker 2: to not be judge me, so I'm gonna listen to
Speaker 2: what you have to say. I'm not gonna tell you
Speaker 2: what I'm not sure. I'm gonna try because I am
Speaker 2: because sometime when it comes to niggas, damn again, when
Speaker 2: it comes to these when it comes to these men,
Speaker 2: I'm not gonna lie when it comes to situations with
Speaker 2: my friends with me, and this is what I will say.
Speaker 2: I do feel like you can come and talk to
Speaker 2: me about whatever, and I'm not gonna say nyhing. I'm
Speaker 2: gonna just listen to you. I'm gonna hear you out
Speaker 2: and unless you ask me for my opinion, that's the
Speaker 2: only time I'm gonna just give you my opinion or
Speaker 2: tell you what I think you should do. But after
Speaker 2: a certain period of time, I just don't want to
Speaker 2: hear the sheet no more because I am that type
Speaker 2: of friend who I'm just gonna let you be into me.
Speaker 2: I'm gonna let you talk to me. I'm not gonna
Speaker 2: give you my unbiased opinion for no reason. So after
Speaker 2: a while, especially if you ask me and I tell you, friend,
Speaker 2: I don't really think this is the best situation for you.
Speaker 2: I don't really feel like the love and the energies
Speaker 2: being reciprocated by him. What you're giving into the relationship,
Speaker 2: it's not what you're getting back out of it. And
Speaker 2: if I tell you that stuff any you still choose
Speaker 2: to stay, and you steady keep coming back to me
Speaker 2: talking to you out the same stuff. I just don't
Speaker 2: got the energy no more talk to your therapy.
Speaker 1: So I one hundred percent understand where you're coming from,
Speaker 1: because it does get aggravated. But I'm a little bit
Speaker 1: on the opposite end. I think you know that about me.
Speaker 1: I don't give a damn how many times you taking
Speaker 1: the man back. Sometimes people have to keep going back
Speaker 1: till they're tired. And you're gonna keep going back until
Speaker 1: you get tired. So I'm the friend that's like, I'm
Speaker 1: gonna listen, I'm gonna be here. But I will say
Speaker 1: I'm not the friend that's I'm just gonna be a
Speaker 1: listening ear. I'm finna tell you how bad he sucks.
Speaker 1: I don't like him. I'm gonna give you my opinion,
Speaker 1: whether you ask for it or now. See, I try
Speaker 1: not to tell I'm finna eat him up every time. Now,
Speaker 1: there are two situations that I don't play with. There's
Speaker 1: two things that that's. This is when I get mad
Speaker 1: because you have to cut him off and it's no hands,
Speaker 1: it's or butts about it. If he put his hands
Speaker 1: on you, and if he have a baby on you.
Speaker 1: Those are two things that I'm not tolerating that for
Speaker 1: any of my friends. Now, if it's like a cheating situation,
Speaker 1: or you know, he's not being as attentive, you know
Speaker 1: the other relationship problems which are are as bad too,
Speaker 1: Like I can handle you talking to me about that
Speaker 1: over and over again, and I'm be like, hey, look
Speaker 1: what we're doing today, how we feeling today? Are we
Speaker 1: crying today? Are we sad today? Are we happy today?
Speaker 1: Let me be here in any capacity that I can.
Speaker 1: But I will say now, I am a vocal person.
Speaker 1: Hey friend, I'm not gonna lie to you. I'm going
Speaker 1: through something today. I'm having a day. I can't take
Speaker 1: that today. I don't have the capacity to listen to
Speaker 1: this today. But my friends know that about me, so
Speaker 1: they're like, okay, friend, I understand.
Speaker 2: I'll call you tomorrow.
Speaker 1: You know what I'm saying. My friends know my boundary.
Speaker 1: So hey, les, you good? Can you talk? I got
Speaker 1: this going on? Oh yeah, what's up? What's going on?
Speaker 1: You know what I'm saying. So, but like I said, now,
Speaker 1: if this man that had a baby on you, are
Speaker 1: he gonna put his hands on you?
Speaker 2: Oh yeah? You getting them? You getting them lashings. You
Speaker 2: gonna get them fucking lashes If you talking to me
Speaker 2: about a cheating man too, I don't want to hear
Speaker 2: you talking to me about a man they keep I
Speaker 2: don't care to he not putting his hands on you.
Speaker 2: I don't care if he didn't go have a baby
Speaker 2: on you. He keep cheating on you, and you think
Speaker 2: you about to keep calling me talking to me about it?
Speaker 2: Absolutely not, are you so.
Speaker 1: I will say my friend's gonna get tired or talking
Speaker 1: to me about them. I'm not finna be like, girl,
Speaker 1: I hear you, but I'm gonna be like, you're dumb.
Speaker 2: But that's the thing too, I feel like that's fair
Speaker 2: to say. Eventually people will get tired. Sometimes people just
Speaker 2: don't get tired. That's when you have to just draw
Speaker 2: the line of I'm not least right, I just don't.
Speaker 2: I don't want to. I'm here for you, like you
Speaker 2: know what I mean. If you need me or if
Speaker 2: you decide to work up with him, you need somebody
Speaker 2: to be there for you. Cool, but I just don't
Speaker 2: want to hear you calling me telling me about the
Speaker 2: same thing as men keep doing to you over and
Speaker 2: over and over, and you won't leave when you have
Speaker 2: free will.
Speaker 3: Cause I'm not gonna lie I'm a safe space. But
Speaker 3: I'm not.
Speaker 2: I'm not either, not like that because I'm not gonna talk.
Speaker 2: We not about it.
Speaker 1: I'm gonna let you know this ain't it. We're not
Speaker 1: about to talk. We're not about to keep talking about it.
Speaker 1: I'll say this, I'm a safe space. I'm not gonna
Speaker 1: tell your business. But I'm not a safe space if
Speaker 1: you think you're fnna vent to me, and I'm not
Speaker 1: gonna have an opinion like you do a good job
Speaker 1: of like not having an opinion and just listening. I'm
Speaker 1: not gonna do that. I'm gonna tell you you're better than this,
Speaker 1: and I can't believe that you're actually dealing with this.
Speaker 2: Ain't shit man, until though, don't forget to until until
Speaker 2: what I do a good job of doing it, until
Speaker 2: I don't want to hear the shot no more. Like
Speaker 2: after a while, I definitely get to a point where
Speaker 2: I just be having to tell my friends, like give
Speaker 2: them my unsolicity opinion. If you have been talking to
Speaker 2: you about these men for seven months, a year and
Speaker 2: evening the same stuff, I'm gonna be like, okay, because
Speaker 2: I can even give people grace. I feel like you
Speaker 2: can give a man. You can give your friend grace.
Speaker 2: We'll talking to you about a situation for like a
Speaker 2: good six months, maybe even the first year. But then
Speaker 2: if after a year, now, yere's.
Speaker 3: A long time. I didn't know we were talking about.
Speaker 2: This territory what you mean like territory, but a year,
Speaker 2: I'm thinking, what are you talking about though, are you
Speaker 2: talking about like like say, okay.
Speaker 1: For example, say it's a man who's cheating. Oh, you
Speaker 1: ain't about to talk to me about that?
Speaker 2: Four month?
Speaker 3: Oh a month, so you have a month you.
Speaker 2: Can talk to I'm playing maybe not a month. But
Speaker 2: I just don't staying with somebody that's cheating on you
Speaker 2: as a choice, right right of course, especially like I said,
Speaker 2: if you're not in an abusive relationship, you're choosing to
Speaker 2: stay there, you could go find you a man that's faithful.
Speaker 2: I just don't really have a capacity to hear you
Speaker 2: complain about these men when you are not leaving or
Speaker 2: you are not setting any boundaries, and it's not no
Speaker 2: changes being made on his behalf. I just want I'll
Speaker 2: just be wanting better for my friends, and I think
Speaker 2: sometimes that can come off judgmental, and that's okay. I'm
Speaker 2: cool with looking judge if that's the reason why I
Speaker 2: look judgy to you, because I want you to do better.
Speaker 1: I think the thing is it takes some people longer
Speaker 1: to walk away than it does others.
Speaker 3: But I will say this.
Speaker 2: For me, I'll really be trying to take these Like
Speaker 2: you said.
Speaker 1: I keep had one thing that I worked on in
Speaker 1: these past three years. We have to learn to find
Speaker 1: this happiness within the problem. This is the problem. I'm
Speaker 1: gonna rouffle some feathers with this one. When you have
Speaker 1: low self esteem and not a lot of confidence about yourself,
Speaker 1: you stay in situations that are bad for your mental health. Now,
Speaker 1: if you're in a situation a man is cheating, or
Speaker 1: maybe he's not taking you on dates, whatever the issue is,
Speaker 1: if you don't feel like it's taking a toll on you,
Speaker 1: and you're like, okay, I'm trying to figure it out,
Speaker 1: then cool. But if you start you're crying every night.
Speaker 1: Your confidence is shot. You're losing your sparkle, you're losing
Speaker 1: your glow. You need to look within because your confidence
Speaker 1: is tied into this person.
Speaker 3: If you had confidence about.
Speaker 1: Yourself, you would be okay with walking away. You are
Speaker 1: this amazing woman that you know that you are, that
Speaker 1: you truly believe that you are, you would be okay
Speaker 1: with walking away.
Speaker 3: And I'm not talking shit.
Speaker 1: That's something that I had to learn, not in this
Speaker 1: last relationship I was in, but the one before that, right,
Speaker 1: I stayed in that because I let this person break.
Speaker 3: Me down, so where I felt like Oh.
Speaker 1: I have to because nobody else is gonna want me,
Speaker 1: and I let that person do that to me.
Speaker 2: You know what I'm saying, billions of people in the world,
Speaker 2: it's already it's always somebody else who's gonna want you.
Speaker 1: Especially if you I'm really hurt period. Unfortunately for these men,
Speaker 1: I'm really her. So walking away from a situation is
Speaker 1: really not that hard for me anymore. So I know
Speaker 1: all the ladies and all my friends are not there.
Speaker 1: So that's why I say I do have a little
Speaker 1: patience because I was that girl before, so I think
Speaker 1: I have a little bit more patience for it. But
Speaker 1: I will say, you're not finna get up. Oh I understand,
Speaker 1: Oh yes, well this is no You're finna get it, bitch,
Speaker 1: You're finna get it. But you now, you and your
Speaker 1: friends are all like that. I feel, I can honestly say.
Speaker 2: Because when you tell because it's been times where you
Speaker 2: have told me stuff that they have said to you
Speaker 2: about people that you dated and stuff, and it made
Speaker 2: me med. Remember, because I just be like, they don't
Speaker 2: need to tell you that all the time. Because I
Speaker 2: do feel like that. I feel like, if you know
Speaker 2: somebody is going through a messed up situation. You don't
Speaker 2: need to keep throwing it in their face that they're
Speaker 2: stupid or that they need to leave. I needed that though,
Speaker 2: I did you, Yes.
Speaker 1: But I feel I'm not a tough love person, but
Speaker 1: my heart is so big, and you know me, I
Speaker 1: will give anybody the shirt off my fucking back. And
Speaker 1: sometimes it's like, hey, Lex, this person is using you,
Speaker 1: this is not good for you.
Speaker 2: Wake the fuck up. But it's different when I think
Speaker 2: people don't know, like you really have women out here
Speaker 2: that are just naive and stupid. You not naiven stupid. Yeah,
Speaker 2: you knew and I always knew you knew that that
Speaker 2: particular person wasn't she, and like you could do better
Speaker 2: than you knew that because it would be many times
Speaker 2: where you would be meaning to me about him and
Speaker 2: I wouldn't even have to say nothing and you would
Speaker 2: say yeah, So I feel like you knew. You don't
Speaker 2: need me pounding on you like les, yeah, he ain't
Speaker 2: shitting you stupid for staying with him, right. I would
Speaker 2: rather just tell you, don't talk to me about it,
Speaker 2: go talk too.
Speaker 1: You know what's crazy. I'm so aware of myself now
Speaker 1: now as you say that. Therapy is getting harder for
Speaker 1: me because my therapists really can't tell me.
Speaker 3: She's like you already know.
Speaker 2: And also too cybor and it's it's not to try
Speaker 2: to be shady, but it was always also giving pot
Speaker 2: meets kittle. What when you would tell me, oh, oh yeah,
Speaker 2: the stuff that some people would tell you it like
Speaker 2: And that's because that's the thing for me too. I
Speaker 2: can I can say this is a problem I have.
Speaker 2: Can't nobody come tell me what the fuck I need
Speaker 2: to do When I'm looking at what you do and
Speaker 2: what you're doing is not any better than what I'm doing.
Speaker 2: Why should I take your advice?
Speaker 1: Because look at who you are dealing with, right, I think,
Speaker 1: But it's easier on the outside looking in.
Speaker 3: That's why I say I don't care what. I don't
Speaker 3: care what you got going on.
Speaker 2: Sometimes I know.
Speaker 3: I need to hear something.
Speaker 1: I need to hear that for me, that's what I
Speaker 1: need to hear. Like you have done everything you could do, girl,
Speaker 1: walk away. This person is not good for you because honestly,
Speaker 1: in that situation, because it was around the time my
Speaker 1: mom passed, if I didn't have them beating it into
Speaker 1: my head like that, it could have went somewhere where
Speaker 1: it didn't need to go, you know what I'm saying,
Speaker 1: because the mental state I was in, That's what I'm saying.
Speaker 2: So I think for me though, I'm just such a
Speaker 2: different person now what you was about to say about therapy, but.
Speaker 1: In therapy, therapy is getting harder for me because I'm
Speaker 1: so emotionally aware of who i am. So half the
Speaker 1: time when I'm talking to my therapists, I'm like, because this,
Speaker 1: and I know and I needed to because but if
Speaker 1: I did this, She's like, I can't tell you anything
Speaker 1: because you already know.
Speaker 2: What to do. That's how my therapist be with me,
Speaker 2: so she it really just be me talking yeah all
Speaker 2: the time, because she'd be like, well.
Speaker 1: She's like because she's telling me, She's like, look at
Speaker 1: the progress you've made. Because it used to be like,
Speaker 1: oh and I don't know what to do. She's like,
Speaker 1: you have the answers, do it. You know what I'm saying.
Speaker 1: So it's like now my therapy.
Speaker 2: Sessions is really just be me talking, like I'm really.
Speaker 3: Just like I have to say things out loud.
Speaker 1: But I've become so emotionally intelligent, and I think that's
Speaker 1: what it takes too confidence emotional intelligence.
Speaker 2: But I'm not gonna lie. I am that friend. We here.
Speaker 1: I'ma be here until you're ready to walk away. Whenever
Speaker 1: you're ready to move, let's move. If he's hitting you
Speaker 1: and if he had a baby on you, we moving
Speaker 1: right now. But if it's other situations, I am I
Speaker 1: am that friend. I'll be a listener here.
Speaker 2: Yeah, I'm gonna be here. You could talk to me
Speaker 2: about I gid you. No relationship is perfect, Like everybody's
Speaker 2: gonna go through stuff in their relationship. I am being
Speaker 2: through stuff in my relationships. I understand that people need
Speaker 2: to talk to somebody, but it's just certain things, like
Speaker 2: you're not about to keep talking to me about no
Speaker 2: cheating as men. I'm sorry, Like if y'all haven't misunderstandings
Speaker 2: or disagreements about things that y'all both want for y'all future,
Speaker 2: or even if y'all living together and y'all having miscommunication,
Speaker 2: or you hate that he don't never be washing his
Speaker 2: clothes or throwing his clothes on the side of the
Speaker 2: dirty dirty clothes him instead of putting them in there,
Speaker 2: and now y'all into it, and y'all haven't talked for
Speaker 2: a week. Like, I understand people are gonna go through stuff,
Speaker 2: but it's just certain things I want better from my
Speaker 2: friends because one thing about people is men can sniff
Speaker 2: out women who have low self esteem and who don't
Speaker 2: value theyselves. And a man is never going to walk
Speaker 2: away from you if you're allowing him to have his way,
Speaker 2: if you just putting up with what he dishing out
Speaker 2: and you just happy to be there and have a man,
Speaker 2: he's never gonna walk away. So it's up to you
Speaker 2: to want better for yourself because you steady coming to
Speaker 2: me complaining to me about these men, and he like, well,
Speaker 2: I feel like he loved me because he hadn't left me.
Speaker 2: He haven't left you. Not because he loved you, haven't
Speaker 2: left you. Because they never believe they begsdune me. They
Speaker 2: never They never gonna leave the woman who let them. No,
Speaker 2: you're right, but they never gonna leave the woman that
Speaker 2: is gonna let them have their way. It doesn't have
Speaker 2: anything to do with love, yes, And I feel like
Speaker 2: as a woman, you have to know that you have
Speaker 2: to have that sense of self worth. And I feel
Speaker 2: like we're getting too old for this live too. I
Speaker 2: know that we shouldn't try to use age because age
Speaker 2: is just the number. But at the same time, careful
Speaker 2: you keep that man. But seriously though, like I know,
Speaker 2: because in life it doesn't matter what age you are.
Speaker 2: We're always constantly learning, evolving, growing, and you never too
Speaker 2: old to learn a new list. However, though, I have
Speaker 2: wayless tolerance at thirty three for certain things that my
Speaker 2: friends come talk to me about than I had when
Speaker 2: we was twenty three. Yeah, no, I'm because at this
Speaker 2: point it's just kind of like figure it out. I
Speaker 2: know you this with the last five dudes that you dated,
Speaker 2: how many times we got to talk about the same situation.
Speaker 2: When you're gonna realize what the fuck going on and
Speaker 2: get together?
Speaker 1: I do believe to you picking the wrong men, it
Speaker 1: ain't their fault no more, it's yours. I also think
Speaker 1: that goes into a lot of like women don't know
Speaker 1: how to be the one that got away.
Speaker 3: It's so much power in them, and I love being.
Speaker 2: I'm the one that got away, So that's my fuck.
Speaker 2: You do what I say.
Speaker 3: But yes, I think there's so much.
Speaker 1: When I tell y'all, and you can't take away.
Speaker 3: You can't take that away from me.
Speaker 1: How much I love myself, how much I know my worth,
Speaker 1: my value, and how much I know people love me.
Speaker 1: I'm so loved and I'm not talking about me, and
Speaker 1: I'm talking about my friends, my family.
Speaker 3: I am so loved.
Speaker 1: So if you think you're finna come into my life
Speaker 1: and not love me right, you can go because I'm
Speaker 1: not gonna notice that you're gone, because I'm so loved,
Speaker 1: because I'm a good person and I know my worst
Speaker 1: and I know what I deserve, and when it comes
Speaker 1: down to it, I may be crying right now, but
Speaker 1: later on down on the road, you will never forget
Speaker 1: about me.
Speaker 2: You're gonna be.
Speaker 1: Laying in bed with that bitch, think about what lex
Speaker 1: P doing you could you gonna never ever, you could
Speaker 1: never get over this, Leo Queen. You're gonna be walking
Speaker 1: down the owl to your wife wishing it was me.
Speaker 1: I'm not wishing that you would have did it right.
Speaker 3: I agree, So I'm and I'm okay with that because
Speaker 3: I do right by people.
Speaker 2: And I wouldn't even care because once I'm doing with you,
Speaker 2: I don't care who you be thinking about. You could
Speaker 2: think about me, you could be thinking about the next beach.
Speaker 2: I don't give it in because I walked away, right,
Speaker 2: I live in the great part about walking away. Yes,
Speaker 2: And it's like you just gotta know when you need
Speaker 2: to walk away, and the girls notna be knowing. I
Speaker 2: hate when people be like, oh my god, I don't
Speaker 2: understand why he would treat me like these. I don't
Speaker 2: understand why he would do me like these? Or why
Speaker 2: is he wasting my time? You are wasting your time.
Speaker 2: You are wasting your time because you could leave. He
Speaker 2: can't waste your time if you ain't there, and he
Speaker 2: can't do you like that if you're not letting him.
Speaker 2: Do you like that? You know what I mean? Like,
Speaker 2: it's a choice. It's a choice to get mistreated. And
Speaker 2: I'm sorry. I'm not standing for no mistreatment when he
Speaker 2: comes to any man. I'm not letting a man mistreat me.
Speaker 2: And I don't want my friends to be letting me
Speaker 2: in out here be this treat mistreating them. And y'all
Speaker 2: shouldn't let people mistreat y'all period. Man, woman, borrow, I
Speaker 2: don't care who stand on business by yrself? Okay, what
Speaker 2: you think? Time I've cut off friends though, for like
Speaker 2: the one really have that choose the same man over
Speaker 2: and over and over again because it's not gonna end
Speaker 2: well for you. And now if I have if there's
Speaker 2: a DV situation that I have to feel like I'm involved,
Speaker 2: I have to come rescue you. Like some of those
Speaker 2: things I don't have a capacity for. And maybe when
Speaker 2: I was younger I could, I had more capacity. We
Speaker 2: were learning and growing. But now nearing forty, no, hon, yeah,
Speaker 2: we can't do that.
Speaker 3: No, I can't do that.
Speaker 2: You gotta love yourself.
Speaker 3: You have to love yourself, and that's the common denominator.
Speaker 2: But I realized in me.
Speaker 3: When I was in like I.
Speaker 1: Said, this is not my last relationship. I'm talking about
Speaker 1: the one before I didn't love myself. I completely had
Speaker 1: left myself go. But I was also going through something
Speaker 1: very fucking devastating as well, you know, And I truly
Speaker 1: feel like I'll say that to today I die.
Speaker 3: I felt like this.
Speaker 1: Person took advantage of the mental state I was in.
Speaker 1: But I say that because I lost all hope and everything.
Speaker 1: And like you said, men can sniff out that confidence.
Speaker 1: Because I would say this, Andre, you can attest for this.
Speaker 1: Of all the years of dealing with that man, he
Speaker 1: had never had me down bad like that. Every time
Speaker 1: we would kind of fall out. I was in a
Speaker 1: country with the next dude or I was doing I was.
Speaker 2: Like, oh yeah, yeah, you would always I would go, always,
Speaker 2: go and do.
Speaker 1: He never had me down bad, but it was like
Speaker 1: he caught me at the most vulnerable time in my life.
Speaker 3: And that's when I knew this is what women are going.
Speaker 1: Through when they can't get out of these situations because
Speaker 1: you're not loving yourself, you know. I felt like in
Speaker 1: that moment, I had lost everything, So I was just
Speaker 1: trying to attach myself onto anything anybody that was around. So, yeah,
Speaker 1: bitch ass nigga, you call me slippingever again?
Speaker 3: Yees he was.
Speaker 2: I was like, excuse me, girl. But when I tore
Speaker 2: it up to the function and I seen him, I said, oh,
Speaker 2: but let me tell you how God works, because now
Speaker 2: we can talk about it because by the time this
Speaker 2: episode drugs, let me tell how God works. When I
Speaker 2: got out this relationship, and I'm telling you all this
Speaker 2: because this is why it's important to pour into yourself.
Speaker 1: When I got off that relationship, poor minds, it was
Speaker 1: already going up. Poor minds went up. Okay, I made
Speaker 1: the next year. I have made the most money I
Speaker 1: ever made. After I have really dropped that relationship, and
Speaker 1: then in twenty twenty four that was made even more money,
Speaker 1: and now in twenty twenty five, we're finna be on
Speaker 1: BT with a travel show.
Speaker 2: Amen. Because it's a testament that God will reward you
Speaker 2: for being obedient. Hello, And I was obedient to the Lord. No, Yeah,
Speaker 2: because I I feel like God had been shown you
Speaker 2: signs that you needed to walk away from this situation.
Speaker 2: And God will tell you he will not only direction
Speaker 2: that he wants you to go, And if you keep
Speaker 2: me in d sobedient, your life is going to be
Speaker 2: your reflection of that. But as soon as you decide
Speaker 2: to listen to him and take heed to what he's
Speaker 2: trying to show you and get on the path that
Speaker 2: he wants you to be on, your blessings is going over.
Speaker 2: And I feel like that's what happened.
Speaker 3: My faith is always stronger than my doubt.
Speaker 1: And then I said what Beyonce said, the best revenge
Speaker 1: is your paper treated somebody like complete shit. And now
Speaker 1: you got to turn on the TV and see my face.
Speaker 1: You can never escape me, baby, because my blessings are
Speaker 1: rolling in. And I'm not saying that was my motivation
Speaker 1: I'm not thinking about him. I'm just saying how much
Speaker 1: my life elevated when I walked away. There is power
Speaker 1: in walking away. There is so much power in walking
Speaker 1: away because I know he looking like.
Speaker 2: Damn and some people in your life to be distractions, yes, man,
Speaker 2: you know, but you have to have that spirit of
Speaker 2: discernment to be able to walk away cut it off,
Speaker 2: no matter how painful or stressful you feel like it
Speaker 2: might be or hard to walk away from that as soon.
Speaker 2: I've experienced it so many times. As soon as you
Speaker 2: dropped that dead weight, the blessings like, like you said,
Speaker 2: you're rewarded for paying attention, for getting yourself for what
Speaker 2: do we say with the Lord dang on a space
Speaker 2: out what not? Obedience? It's another word that we use
Speaker 2: for like like you're actually listening to what the Lord
Speaker 2: is saying, like you're doing his will. Sorry I messed
Speaker 2: it up, but no, it's.
Speaker 3: Okay because I get what you're saying.
Speaker 1: Because this is the thing though, I think a lot
Speaker 1: of times we pray to God to guide us, Yeah,
Speaker 1: but we don't pay attention to the signs that he
Speaker 1: gives us.
Speaker 2: I literally, God is the type of God that if
Speaker 2: you ask him for a specific sign. He will literally
Speaker 2: seen the specific sign, and people still ignore the specific
Speaker 2: sign that you asked for. Hold on, that's not what
Speaker 2: I asked for it.
Speaker 1: But now I've learned to pay attention. Hey, God, is
Speaker 1: this what I'm supposed to do? A what am I
Speaker 1: supposed to do? Please just guide me?
Speaker 2: Man?
Speaker 1: Oh, it just be so crazy. I seriously, I'm so
Speaker 1: specific with my praise. You have to be And every
Speaker 1: morning I'll be waking up and it's like what I
Speaker 1: asked for. It's just like the simplest things I be
Speaker 1: asking for. He's like, and it just be man. And
Speaker 1: that's why I say. The fact that we have a
Speaker 1: travel show right.
Speaker 2: Now, like what now? And I probably don't remember when.
Speaker 1: I had my show with my old roommate Jazz and
Speaker 1: Lex Where to Next? So it's like doing this is
Speaker 1: like exactly we manifested this for ourselves. We y'all so
Speaker 1: worried about looking on other people play and you worried
Speaker 1: about this, man, you worried about this. Focus on God
Speaker 1: and focus on your blessings. I'm telling you I focused
Speaker 1: on myself. I got back into church, and I'm telling
Speaker 1: you it just started for everything.
Speaker 2: Because I just spoke a word when she said some
Speaker 2: people are meant to be distraction or it's a test,
Speaker 2: like sometimes God is just testing you, you know, And
Speaker 2: y'all be feeling.
Speaker 3: The tests I passed with flying tell us.
Speaker 2: Not y'all be feeling them tests because y'all will not
Speaker 2: leave these mgg A are y'all, but I'm not gonna
Speaker 2: call them to all right, all right, okay, so now
Speaker 2: my ancestors nam about to be rolling in. We gotta
Speaker 2: googling with you. What's up, y'all? Is your girl XP
Speaker 2: and it's sugarl draining the call.
Speaker 3: And if you're a.
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Speaker 3: I'm gonna tell you about ZocDoc.
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Speaker 3: Zoc doc makes it super easy.
Speaker 1: So are you gonna do is go to zoc doc
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Speaker 3: Get you an appointment. I use this and you should too.
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Speaker 2: What's up, y'all is your girl xp Andy Schagarl Dre
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Speaker 1: bow the bow d B Bow Bow Bow Bow.
Speaker 2: That'd being a theme song. It is just crazy, it's
Speaker 2: a good I'm like, how did we even come up
Speaker 2: with it. You know what's crazy.
Speaker 3: It's on episode one.
Speaker 2: I know, but I'm like, how did it even come about?
Speaker 3: I don't know, I swear.
Speaker 1: So I wanted to talk about a little sexual health
Speaker 1: for a minute and how it impacts your mental health.
Speaker 1: But I also wanted to tie that into the conversation
Speaker 1: we were having having earlier.
Speaker 3: Like I said, So I went to this thing. It
Speaker 3: was called It's a risky It's called Risky Dinner.
Speaker 1: On my phone died. I can't look it up to
Speaker 1: shout the hostyle. I think her name is Koya. I'm
Speaker 1: so sorry if I got her name wrong. But it's
Speaker 1: called Risky Dinner. Weezy hosts it with her. Shout out
Speaker 1: to Weezy, I had an amazing time. So basically, it's
Speaker 1: a dinner and they go around just letting black women
Speaker 1: know like the statistics in their state of like HIV,
Speaker 1: you know, STDs and things like that, because although you know,
Speaker 1: black women are we our population is really low, not
Speaker 1: compared to other ones. Our percentage of having HIV and
Speaker 1: a's is really high. Yeah, they talk with Coya talks
Speaker 1: with Koya, Yes, and she hosts something called Risky Dinner.
Speaker 1: So it's basically, you know, an open table, open mic
Speaker 1: where black women just get to sit and talk. They
Speaker 1: talk about prep how to protect yourself, opening up conversations
Speaker 1: with your partner about getting tested and things like that.
Speaker 1: So I wanted to talk about this because I wanted
Speaker 1: to read this fact for you. Black women account for
Speaker 1: the largest share of new HIV diagnosis among women twenty two,
Speaker 1: as well as the largest share of all women living
Speaker 1: with HIV. The rate of new diagnosis among Black women
Speaker 1: is ten times the rate among white women and three
Speaker 1: times the rate among Latinas that that number is scary,
Speaker 1: and the numbers in Atlanta, she would obviously she was
Speaker 1: talking about specifically in Georgia because the dinner, because they
Speaker 1: travel around, the numbers and Georgia are even scarier, you guys.
Speaker 1: So I wanted to talk about that because it's so
Speaker 1: crazy how growing up my mom was always like, don't
Speaker 1: get pregnant, don't get pregnant. I think that's what they
Speaker 1: do in the black community, even as we're like, don't
Speaker 1: y'all keep having these kids and you ain't got enough
Speaker 1: money'll keep up. But more importantly, we are not protecting
Speaker 1: ourselves from these diseases.
Speaker 2: Let me tell you some. My mama was definitely showing
Speaker 2: me the photos of comedy people with comedia got the rea,
Speaker 2: and I was like, oh, yes, but I agree with you.
Speaker 2: I think that people are definitely people raise their children
Speaker 2: and talk about the fears or the scares of getting
Speaker 2: pregnant rather often than actually talking about the diseases that
Speaker 2: are out here, and more specifically the ones that you
Speaker 2: can't get rid of because HIV herpes there's no cure hepatiites, right,
Speaker 2: there's no cure for these things. And these days with
Speaker 2: things like prep available, which we didn't have twenty years ago,
Speaker 2: thirty years ago, I just feel like it's no excuse
Speaker 2: to be out here living risky. Okay, I like how
Speaker 2: you did that, but yeah, it's no excuse to be
Speaker 2: out here creating risky behavior and doing risky stuff, putting
Speaker 2: yourself in scary situations when you can literally prevent it
Speaker 2: from happening. Yeah, you can prevent it.
Speaker 1: And I think what's scariest too, is like a lot
Speaker 1: of times people don't like getting excuse me, they don't
Speaker 1: like getting tested.
Speaker 2: They're at that.
Speaker 1: Now you can literally do it with your partner. You
Speaker 1: can get tested at home for HIV.
Speaker 2: I mean it is, especially when you be that be
Speaker 2: the long it's fifteen minutes of your life. You'd be like,
Speaker 2: but I'll say this, and it don't seem like every
Speaker 2: time every time you go get tested or you waited
Speaker 2: for some six results, all you see is HIV.
Speaker 1: Oh my gosh, yay. That little billboard scary, but you
Speaker 1: have to do it. That billboard's about a cookout, you
Speaker 1: know what I'm talking about.
Speaker 2: I hate that damn billboard. I'll be like, yes, I'm
Speaker 2: telling you, but it's it's necessary though, like we're we're
Speaker 2: trying to make it a little light, but for real.
Speaker 1: Though, y'all need to go get TIS. But also because
Speaker 1: it's better to know than not, because y'all have to realize.
Speaker 1: We are so advanced with the medicines and stuff that
Speaker 1: are available, so.
Speaker 2: When people are going undetectable, yeah, so it's like you
Speaker 2: can live with it, but it's like you have to.
Speaker 1: Know before it's too late, because once it's too late,
Speaker 1: it's too late.
Speaker 3: There's no going back.
Speaker 1: So I just think that the numbers when I went
Speaker 1: to this dinner of the statistics of black women who
Speaker 1: are being exposed to this who don't know, and it's
Speaker 1: really sad.
Speaker 3: It really breaks my heart because.
Speaker 1: As black men, when we just go through so much bruh,
Speaker 1: it's like the dating is hard for us, then we
Speaker 1: have to deal with stuff like this. Then we gotta
Speaker 1: deal with, you know, being single mothers, being the most unweeded.
Speaker 1: It's just like it's so much on us. And I
Speaker 1: think that's why it ties into all of this. It
Speaker 1: goes back to loving yourself, protecting yourself. Nobody is gonna
Speaker 1: protect us like us, So it's important that we all
Speaker 1: gather and we have these uncomfortable conversations because if we
Speaker 1: don't have it among us, nobody else is gonna protect us.
Speaker 2: And carry your own condom, you know. They be trying
Speaker 2: to say that you, as a woman, you're not supposed
Speaker 2: to carry your own country me and be saying that
Speaker 2: they they gonna judge you, like if they come to
Speaker 2: your house and you got y'all don't care, they gonnaud.
Speaker 1: Honestly in the way I am right now, Like I'm
Speaker 1: not in a relationship, Like I'm cool, Like I'm not like,
Speaker 1: oh my gosh, I need to have sex, Like I'm
Speaker 1: not gonna be out here, like I'm not looking at
Speaker 1: what we call grow, Yes, cause I used to be horny.
Speaker 2: You need that deep, you need that more than the
Speaker 2: air you breath. I thought I did, but you know,
Speaker 2: I don't know. I'm just so so that is real growth.
Speaker 3: I don't know what got into me.
Speaker 2: The Holy ghost, it's the Holy girl.
Speaker 3: I'm telling you.
Speaker 2: Lord, I'm I don't know, very proud of you.
Speaker 3: Yes, but I'm not even like worried about that.
Speaker 1: Like I found so much peace and just being alone,
Speaker 1: like I'm getting everything I ever wanted. Like I know
Speaker 1: I keep saying that, but bro, I'm gonna be on
Speaker 1: t B like this is what I've been fighting for
Speaker 1: my whole life.
Speaker 2: Like I get to go home and go to.
Speaker 1: Sleep, and I don't ain't nobody's son stressing me out. Yeah,
Speaker 1: I ain't gotta cook for nobody. I ain't got nothing now,
Speaker 1: don't get it twisted. Do I want partnership one day? Yeah,
Speaker 1: but when God is ready to send me my man,
Speaker 1: He's gonna send it to me. So it's just like
Speaker 1: and not a day late. So I'm not worried about it.
Speaker 2: I know the woman I am.
Speaker 3: But like I said, going.
Speaker 1: Back to this, I know that I have to protect myself.
Speaker 1: Nobody's gonna protect me. Nobody's gonna look out for me
Speaker 1: but us. Y'all, you have to go get tested. Me
Speaker 1: and black men out there. Stop thinking because she got
Speaker 1: tested and she don't got nothing that you don't got nothing.
Speaker 2: It does not work like that, cause that be their
Speaker 2: favorite line. You ain't gonna yeah, but are you?
Speaker 3: Y'all have to pay attention. If your man is throwing
Speaker 3: your bav off, stop fucking him immediately.
Speaker 2: Probably.
Speaker 1: If you wake up and you feel like a fish
Speaker 1: fry on a Friday night, stop having sex.
Speaker 2: With that man. Hey, we're keeping it real. I know
Speaker 2: we are. That's why I say you're gonna be a
Speaker 2: freaky frog.
Speaker 1: That's carry your own condoms fish from. If you wake
Speaker 1: up and you fish fries be lingering like.
Speaker 2: After you fire, after you fry some fish in your house,
Speaker 2: your clothes be smelling like your couch, it be lingering.
Speaker 2: The fish fry is not what you want to smell like.
Speaker 2: So yeah, I just specially not no cat.
Speaker 3: But it was just so eye opening. I went home.
Speaker 3: They gave us a little at home kids, Babe.
Speaker 2: I went home.
Speaker 3: I took that test so quick? Is that what these
Speaker 3: mix like?
Speaker 2: It looks like a kid, like a box and unboxing.
Speaker 2: I was looking at their yegram. They have some of
Speaker 2: them where you can get you got to send in
Speaker 2: the results. And then some of them they have where
Speaker 2: you know you can wait and they you know, the fifeste.
Speaker 1: So but yeah, y'all just please just go get tested,
Speaker 1: especially my black women. It's so many, like literally ninety
Speaker 1: nine of our listeners are black women, y'all. Please, these
Speaker 1: numbers are crazy. Do some more researcher stuff. Y'all please
Speaker 1: go get tested. Yes, y'all, please protect yourself. Please stop
Speaker 1: listening to people. And y'all know this is what we
Speaker 1: learned at risky Dinner too. Do y'all know they have
Speaker 1: people creating fake my charts for people nowadays.
Speaker 2: Hobby because what they are what hobby? It is grave
Speaker 2: random ship they're creating. No, I said, but my tie
Speaker 2: had exit of my charteys, like you know, basically when
Speaker 2: you go online and he shows you your Yeah, they're
Speaker 2: copying that like their their their photo.
Speaker 1: That they have negative test results. So again, ladies, go
Speaker 1: get tested. Protect yourself, even in a relationship, protect yourself.
Speaker 1: Unless y'all are constantly going get tested together. There was
Speaker 1: a lady there who was actually married, and she said, yes,
Speaker 1: me and my husband, we still go get tested. We
Speaker 1: go get tested, like because you know how many women
Speaker 1: get STDs that are from their husband and their husbands
Speaker 1: are you know, even vice versa. I don't, oh, you
Speaker 1: the one doing to be doing the bandage job.
Speaker 2: That's no, that's what she said in the movie, because
Speaker 2: she got HIV from her husband.
Speaker 3: Yep.
Speaker 1: And then that's another misconception to a lot of people
Speaker 1: think oh, it's just high and this and that because
Speaker 1: of the DM men. That is another thing that's like
Speaker 1: out the window. At the end of the day, it's us.
Speaker 1: We have the highest rate of it. You know what
Speaker 1: I'm saying. It's not like we are only sleeping with
Speaker 1: DM men. We're sleeping with men of all races, all everything.
Speaker 1: So we have to protect yourself and.
Speaker 2: If you engage in in risky behaviors, to make sure
Speaker 2: that you're Like, if you did something crazy last week,
Speaker 2: definitely go test yourself. But then just always be mindful
Speaker 2: that you have to test yourself again in ninety that
Speaker 2: because your results might not be accurate. If you just
Speaker 2: did something last week, I just thought I would throw it.
Speaker 3: I'm just gaking my thing a lot lot for a while.
Speaker 2: Give it to the Lord. Yea, let the Lord handily?
Speaker 1: All right, item of the week. You well, I know
Speaker 1: y'all see the orange tresses. They have been freaking out
Speaker 1: about this little hair.
Speaker 3: Little girl.
Speaker 2: It's cute, you know what I'm saying.
Speaker 1: I haven't done color in a long time. So I
Speaker 1: got this custom unit from rich Look Hair dot Com.
Speaker 1: Shout out to my girl DD. It's a custom color.
Speaker 1: If y'all want this same unit, you just go hit
Speaker 1: her up and look like it's coming from the scout.
Speaker 1: But also she has units that are like ready made
Speaker 1: to go.
Speaker 3: You can order it. She's send the sea house. You
Speaker 3: just pop it on and go.
Speaker 1: I think everybody needs to have a week to throw
Speaker 1: on their head. Yeah, between hairstyles. So I'm really trying
Speaker 1: to grow my hair out right now. So I'm trying
Speaker 1: to marry Ruth's hair growth multi vitamin little juice stuff.
Speaker 1: I'm gonna let y'all know how it goes because I'm
Speaker 1: gonna keep my glueless units on for a while because
Speaker 1: i want to really try to grow my hair back
Speaker 1: out and see what it do.
Speaker 3: So yeah, Rich Look Hair shout out to d D.
Speaker 3: That's where I got my hair from.
Speaker 2: Yes, and of course y'all know, my item of the
Speaker 2: week is mus Beautycollection dot com. Make sure you get
Speaker 2: your lip glosses, lipliners, met liquid lipsticks, jelly bliss, She's
Speaker 2: we have all the things lip plumper and I have
Speaker 2: some new products that are coming out soon mesker an
Speaker 2: eyeliner should actually be on the on the site shortly.
Speaker 2: So yeah, and what's my lipcombos today? I have on
Speaker 2: the fudgemelip gloss. I have on the Rose mattleick with
Speaker 2: lipstick and the lip plumper period poop se up. Y'all
Speaker 2: at your Girl XP and it's sugarl Dre and the call.
Speaker 2: Y'all know.
Speaker 3: We have a segment on Poor Minds called Item of
Speaker 3: the Week.
Speaker 1: But do you have a product or something that you
Speaker 1: want to promote and you want it featured on Poor Minds.
Speaker 2: Your opportunity is here period. If you have an item
Speaker 2: or you have a business and you want to get
Speaker 2: it promoted. We are now having slots available on the
Speaker 2: Poor Minds episode. So if you would like to get
Speaker 2: your product featured for Item of the Week, all you
Speaker 2: need to do is send an email to item of
Speaker 2: the week PM at gmail dot com. That's I T
Speaker 2: E M O F T H E W E E
Speaker 2: K PM at gmail dot com. Send us an email
Speaker 2: and we'll work it out. We gonna figgur it out.
Speaker 2: Get your product, get yall business sponsored, and yeah, make
Speaker 2: you some money. We love to some more.
Speaker 3: A small business man.
Speaker 2: And a black business said that, but I mean discriminade.
Speaker 2: Any business is welcome, all right.
Speaker 1: So now it's time to get into the by the
Speaker 1: bye bow the how bow bow Bow bow bow.
Speaker 2: You know what I found? This good song.
Speaker 1: I love TikTok. TikTok always puts me on the good jam.
Speaker 1: So it's a song called Ordinary. It's about this guy.
Speaker 1: His name is Alex Warren. It's a good pop ballad.
Speaker 1: I feel like the pop boys are coming back. They're
Speaker 1: making a comeback and it's just a love song. And
Speaker 1: what it is is the reason this song is so
Speaker 1: intriguing to me is because his actual wife is in
Speaker 1: the video.
Speaker 3: And like, there's a trend on TikTok right now.
Speaker 1: Everybody's showing themselves in relationships or they're showing like, hey,
Speaker 1: I'm made of love. And this is why I'm so
Speaker 1: patient because I know that one day I'm going to
Speaker 1: find a man that can write a song like this
Speaker 1: about me. It's such a beautiful song. Oh my gosh,
Speaker 1: I haven't heard a good love ballad like this in.
Speaker 2: A long time. Really.
Speaker 1: It kind of gives me, like, you know how like
Speaker 1: white people's church music sounds.
Speaker 2: Okay, you know what. I I don't know if that's
Speaker 2: making me want to go listen, But no, white people
Speaker 2: be getting down in the church. They do. They be
Speaker 2: having a little white boy on a piano and it's like, Oh,
Speaker 2: God is good. You know.
Speaker 1: I thought she was more so something about Oh, no, no,
Speaker 1: I'm talking about That's what I thought she was talking about. No, no, no,
Speaker 1: I'm not you talking about the you're getting into the
Speaker 1: Catholic I'm talking about the white Baptist church. They get
Speaker 1: down a little bit now, Okay, Okay, it is giving.
Speaker 1: I'm telling y'all, it is such a good song. If
Speaker 1: y'all listen to Alex Warren ordinary it sounds like a
Speaker 1: church song, like a white church song. But he is
Speaker 1: singing down you know what.
Speaker 2: That's fear do I'm want to be listening to. I
Speaker 2: think he's ninety nine point three in Houston. My mom
Speaker 2: would listen to their station all the time, y'all, and
Speaker 2: it's a gospel station. But all they play is like
Speaker 2: a white contemporary crest, and it sounds good.
Speaker 1: Any duet on there. I will not lie, That's what
Speaker 1: I'm saying. I wasn't being funny.
Speaker 3: It sounds like like white.
Speaker 1: I wouldn't say it's black, because you know, black church
Speaker 1: music is soulful. It's not a soulful song. Let me
Speaker 1: make sure I say the right ring.
Speaker 3: But it's a beautiful ballad, and I'm.
Speaker 2: Ready to get a beautiful bad It's a beautiful ballad.
Speaker 3: Let's get back to the love songs.
Speaker 2: I'm tired of.
Speaker 1: Like I said in the past, I don't want to
Speaker 1: wet the back up. I don't want to beat that
Speaker 1: pussy up no more. Okay, tired.
Speaker 3: Somebody said, all right, Drea, what's your bob?
Speaker 2: I don't wait. Let me make sure I see it.
Speaker 2: This same the right station.
Speaker 3: You think they're gonna give you an interview?
Speaker 2: No, but I just want to if people live in
Speaker 2: Houston and they are looking for it's eighty nine point three,
Speaker 2: I said, ninety nine point it's eighty No, what do
Speaker 2: you mean eighty nine point three FM. The Good State
Speaker 2: should be like ninety because they're ninety five and up.
Speaker 2: Because you know how every station got the theme, they'd
Speaker 2: be like eighty nine point three Spache. Let's how I go.
Speaker 2: So anyway, listening to the station. So if y'all are
Speaker 2: looking for a good Christian channel that plays contemporary Christian
Speaker 2: music and y'all live in Houston, check.
Speaker 3: Out three Period eighty nine point three.
Speaker 2: Amen. So my Bob because now we're about to get
Speaker 2: into some heathing music. But my Bob is an old song.
Speaker 2: I was listening to My Savages earlier today, my future
Speaker 2: and that is just what was I mean, he's still
Speaker 2: on his little No, I'm talking about his about that yeah,
Speaker 2: like twenty eleven to like twenty seventeen, Real Sisters dropped
Speaker 2: my life. Real, this was about my Savages, was about
Speaker 2: Pea Coats about I mean, I could really keep going
Speaker 2: because I was really in my future bag making them days.
Speaker 2: But anyways, I was listening to My Savages earlier today
Speaker 2: and I was just like, wow, now this is hood gospel. Yeah.
Speaker 3: A preacher is what he was.
Speaker 2: Yeah, apparature is a deacon, a deacon to our community,
Speaker 2: and he really said some profound words in that song.
Speaker 2: I said, wow much my spirit because I felt that,
Speaker 2: because that's how I feel about you know what on TikTok.
Speaker 3: That lady and he was arguing with on Twitter.
Speaker 1: I mean yeah, on TikTok Okay, he was on the
Speaker 1: phone screaming okay because he was getting that word up.
Speaker 2: But now and I just feel like, like I was saying,
Speaker 2: I just feel like, as I'm as, we're continuing to
Speaker 2: grow and poor Minds is getting bigger and bigger. That
Speaker 2: is really how I feel about my friends and stuff.
Speaker 2: Because you can't let the money get between us. You
Speaker 2: can't let the fame give between You can't let these
Speaker 2: beaches and these niggas get between us. That's what he
Speaker 2: said on the song. He said, this is a little
Speaker 2: for my dogs. How we let this money get between us,
Speaker 2: How we let these bitches get between us? How we
Speaker 2: let these niggas get between us? A word I got
Speaker 2: love for all my savages with fingers fingers another head
Speaker 2: Oh yeah, okay out because that was the head I
Speaker 2: must say big good times. When it came out, we
Speaker 2: was young and rich and reckless. Life was it was
Speaker 2: now we're still old and older. Oh we're not old,
Speaker 2: we're older.
Speaker 1: We live a little little bit of So now we're
Speaker 1: getting into our favorite segment of the week. If you
Speaker 1: want your question to answer on the show, and make
Speaker 1: sure you email us at ask poor Minds at gmail.
Speaker 1: If you're a Patreon member, please put that in the
Speaker 1: subject line and you will get to skip the line.
Speaker 3: Okay, you want to go first, you want me go first,
Speaker 3: I'll go first. Okay.
Speaker 2: I've been with my girlfriend for a few years now
Speaker 2: and we have a baby together. Everything was good until
Speaker 2: about six months ago when I logg on the social
Speaker 2: media and saw a picture of my child on her
Speaker 2: ex's page, with him claiming the baby as his. I
Speaker 2: confronted her, and she swore he was just being spiteful,
Speaker 2: trying to ruin our relationship. She even offered a DNA test,
Speaker 2: but I'm scared to take you because I don't believe
Speaker 2: things like these happen by coincidents. So, as two women,
Speaker 2: what do y'all think? Am I overthinking? Or is there
Speaker 2: something I need to do? I think you need to confirm.
Speaker 1: Was it a picture that he took off of her
Speaker 1: social media or was it a picture he him holding
Speaker 1: the baby?
Speaker 2: Right?
Speaker 1: Because if she brought the baby around him and it's
Speaker 1: a picture that he took, you need to get that
Speaker 1: DNA test.
Speaker 2: Well, I feel like I would get the DNA test
Speaker 2: either way if she offering, If she like, oh we
Speaker 2: can get a DNA test, I will take her up
Speaker 2: on the offer.
Speaker 1: Why I feel so comfortable doing that? Are they still
Speaker 1: having conversations? Are they still talking? Because I could imagine
Speaker 1: just somebody out the blue just posting a random baby
Speaker 1: from a random ax and being like, oh, this is
Speaker 1: my baby, and.
Speaker 2: I just I don't know. I think in situations like that,
Speaker 2: if I was presented with that type of information, if
Speaker 2: I was a man and I was presenting with that
Speaker 2: type of information for my own peace of mind, now
Speaker 2: I just need to know. Yeah, I need to know
Speaker 2: so I could sleep will at night, because it's always
Speaker 2: gonna be I feel like, if you don't get the
Speaker 2: DNA test, it's still gonna always be something that's lingering
Speaker 2: in the back of your mind. As this child is
Speaker 2: growing up, you gonna always feel like, ah, it's a
Speaker 2: possibility that this might not be my baby. Just do
Speaker 2: it for your own peace of mind, and hopefully we're
Speaker 2: gonna pray did he show baby. But if even if
Speaker 2: it's not, at least now you know, you know what
Speaker 2: I mean. At least now you know, and you could
Speaker 2: say good.
Speaker 1: Readings to that, because, like I said, she's offering a
Speaker 1: DNA test. I think you need that DNA test for
Speaker 1: peace of mind. I know you're afraid, but there's nothing
Speaker 1: better than peace of mind.
Speaker 2: I agree.
Speaker 1: All right, Hey, ladies, I'm twenty seven and I need
Speaker 1: advice from my big homies because maybe I'm tripping. I
Speaker 1: was dating this guy for three months. The first two
Speaker 1: he was checking all my boxes, but in month three
Speaker 1: I started noticing red flags his views on women, lack
Speaker 1: of accountability, etc.
Speaker 2: I was already debating cutting him off.
Speaker 1: Then one day on FaceTime, I responded with a little
Speaker 1: sass and he said it sounded like you want to
Speaker 1: get head budded. Instantly, I felt uneasy since I've been
Speaker 1: in an abusive relationships before, which he knew. I asked
Speaker 1: him to repeat it. He refused and tried to play
Speaker 1: it off. Laughed and called me crazy and said I
Speaker 1: was making him the villain. Then he admitted I heard right,
Speaker 1: but claimed it was a joke and I was overreacting.
Speaker 1: I hung up texting him how I felt and he
Speaker 1: never responded. Did I doubt dodge a bullet? Or am
Speaker 1: I projecting because of my past?
Speaker 2: Love? Y'all? Deep? What have you said?
Speaker 3: As fuck?
Speaker 2: Yeah? Because I just feel like you don't joke like
Speaker 2: to me. That's not like if you say something like that,
Speaker 2: I am under the impression that you will actually do
Speaker 2: it one day. Why you don't You shouldn't even play
Speaker 2: like that. Do you want to get head?
Speaker 1: But especially with somebody who has been in an abusive relationship,
Speaker 1: but even period, even if she wasn't in an abusive relationship,
Speaker 1: you just shouldn't even play with no woman like this
Speaker 1: saying something like well, the reason I say especially because
Speaker 1: she's been an abusive relationship before because she's told you
Speaker 1: and that's.
Speaker 2: A trigger for her.
Speaker 1: So instead of you being, hey, understanding, I'm so sorry,
Speaker 1: I won't joke like that. I didn't mean like that.
Speaker 1: I wasn't thinking you're saying that she's over, you're gaslighting her.
Speaker 1: I hate when people tell somebody how something made them
Speaker 1: feel and you're like, well, you're being stupid.
Speaker 2: You can't tell people how to feel.
Speaker 1: About something that you said to them and how it
Speaker 1: makes them feel that's crazy to me.
Speaker 2: So you're not wrong.
Speaker 1: You dodged a bullet because, like I said, I think
Speaker 1: that's somebody will joking's laugh and like that, he said.
Speaker 3: His first reaction went through his mind.
Speaker 2: I't nothing funny about being joking about. I've never like
Speaker 2: like I'll just use my like my last relationship.
Speaker 3: He ain't never said nothing like, yeah, I choke your ass?
Speaker 3: What No, No, that's crazy.
Speaker 2: List he's during six. It's a little all right, that's
Speaker 2: a little different. No, I like a little choke. Okay,
Speaker 2: that's the only one's a different. Uh cbd, that's the
Speaker 2: only that's the only appropriate time to say that. All right, y'all.
Speaker 1: Make sure y'all check out Travel Queens on B E T.
Speaker 1: Y'all make sure y'all check out Love lexp Every Monday
Speaker 1: ten am. We talk about all the hot topics and
Speaker 1: all the reality TV shows. We're doing Real Housewives of
Speaker 1: Atlanta right now. And the tea is hot.
Speaker 2: Oh yes, of course. Make sure y'all shop music. Why
Speaker 2: did you make that page cause you couldn't muse beautycollection
Speaker 2: dot com. Also make sure you follow my YouTube channel
Speaker 2: dre and a Call with three E's. I drop videos
Speaker 2: every week. It's either always gonna be a blog or
Speaker 2: something beauty lifestyle related.
Speaker 3: Stop hereiod.
Speaker 1: All right, y'all with bye y'all, y'all, make sure y'all
Speaker 1: share the content like subscribe, follow all that good stuff.
Speaker 1: And let me say this before we close off, y'all.
Speaker 1: There is one Twitter account that is connected to poor Minds.
Speaker 3: It's p O.
Speaker 1: You are underscore in my nds. Y'all are tagging the
Speaker 1: wrong poor Minds page. If you see at poor minds
Speaker 1: with no underscore, that is at fake page. Do not
Speaker 1: follow that page. Okay, they block me Andrea and the
Speaker 1: poor Minds page on both so we only have one Instagram,
Speaker 1: one Twitter, one TikTok.
Speaker 2: It is PO you are underscore in my nds, all right,
Speaker 2: and we gotta hell a fake Facebook page on the
Speaker 2: Facebook pages it's our face. The crazy thing is our
Speaker 2: Facebook page actually have the least amount of file.
Speaker 1: So if you're on Facebook, one that's ours got the
Speaker 1: least amount.
Speaker 2: Of FI, but one that's not us got like two
Speaker 2: hundred and fifty.
Speaker 1: Make if you actually look at the content, because the
Speaker 1: caption is like whoever it is, don't speak English, because
Speaker 1: their captures.
Speaker 2: Are like bumba claude? Should men? Should men pay bill?
Speaker 2: Should men pay bill?
Speaker 3: Yes?
Speaker 2: No? Check answer below block block Like that's literally what
Speaker 2: the captions. I'm like, what that DG is? Bumba claude,
Speaker 2: bumba claude.
Speaker 3: Savages.
Speaker 2: My savage is my savage is my savage? Stressing pressure
Speaker 2: in a manure. I grew up in a ruthless environment.
Speaker 2: I'm on the phone with y'all. I asked them how
Speaker 2: to trial in thirty five Rex is how my day
Speaker 2: would spend. I gotta cocky back, That's how my day
Speaker 2: would get Gonna be thinking all these bitches at official
Speaker 2: the way you acting, you must don't respect the real
Speaker 2: niggas her on a post some syrup. They try to
Speaker 2: infiltray us and then betray us. I told you way
Speaker 2: before what happened. They was hating on us. Hey, you
Speaker 2: know we was jogging for it. They was mad at us. Hey,
Speaker 2: it's a little for my dogs. How we let this
Speaker 2: money get between us? How we let these bitches get
Speaker 2: between us? How we let these niggas get between us? Yeah?
Speaker 2: I got love for all my savages with ishi fingers.
Speaker 2: I got love, buddy. It ain't like the love I
Speaker 2: got for India. She be that one I was broke.
Speaker 2: I got us to Infinity cast some murdered girl gonna.
Speaker 2: I know you feeling me r ip. My granddad Quickie
Speaker 2: should have seen this shit. Twenty was of soft support.
Speaker 2: I seen this shit roding wrong with all them choppers
Speaker 2: don't seen this sheep. These rappers mad at me. But
Speaker 2: these niggas ain't doing sh sh and I found a cushlo.
Speaker 2: I can smoke this ship and when it's fit to
Speaker 2: half a ticket at the dealer ship ship the famous
Speaker 2: doing a lot of dammite my free ship. If it's
Speaker 2: me jump ship and it's a love from my fans.
Speaker 2: Got me still here. Monster say I'm a lumin natty.
Speaker 2: They trying to fake me catch your body. I don't
Speaker 2: know what I'm a flip nigga. Give me some codin
Speaker 2: and Nigga Big Masail wiping Nigga knows Big Masai Wiping
Speaker 2: Nigga knows my girl shirts locking the dogs or by
Speaker 2: this ship pulling up a fall. Ain't falling in love
Speaker 2: with no hole.
Speaker 1: I had.
Speaker 2: I hate to fuck with any of you niggas. That's
Speaker 2: my only regret. Drada Mink on the floor on my
Speaker 2: whole home. Would have thought we was Paul. Paul would
Speaker 2: think we was oh money, laying on the floor on
Speaker 2: some holes with me. She al pro so. She never
Speaker 2: met another nigga, not another another nigga like me. Even
Speaker 2: if he got a million dollars, he can't make her
Speaker 2: come like me. We're calling men. She like me. I
Speaker 2: don't know, I have lesson fi I was. That was
Speaker 2: good clig. That was really a right man. See y'all
Speaker 2: next week, bring all my niggas in carcarratio.