1 00:00:09,600 --> 00:00:12,799 Speaker 1: I started to realize that not being an expert isn't 2 00:00:12,840 --> 00:00:16,560 Speaker 1: a liability, it's a real gift. If we don't know 3 00:00:16,640 --> 00:00:18,880 Speaker 1: something about ourselves at this point in our life, it's 4 00:00:18,920 --> 00:00:22,360 Speaker 1: probably because it's uncomfortable to know. If you can die 5 00:00:22,440 --> 00:00:25,800 Speaker 1: before you die, then you can really live. There's a 6 00:00:25,840 --> 00:00:30,520 Speaker 1: wisdom at death's door. I thought I was insane. Yeah, 7 00:00:30,960 --> 00:00:32,400 Speaker 1: and I didn't know what to do because there was 8 00:00:32,440 --> 00:00:35,880 Speaker 1: no internet. I don't know, man, I'm like, I feel 9 00:00:35,920 --> 00:00:41,440 Speaker 1: like everything is hard. Hey, y'all, my name is Kat. 10 00:00:41,880 --> 00:00:45,040 Speaker 1: I'm a human first and a licensed therapist second. And 11 00:00:45,159 --> 00:00:48,400 Speaker 1: right now I'm inviting you into conversations that I hope 12 00:00:48,479 --> 00:00:53,920 Speaker 1: encourage you to become more curious and less judgmental about yourself, others, 13 00:00:54,040 --> 00:00:58,040 Speaker 1: and the world around you. Welcome to You Need Therapy. 14 00:00:59,200 --> 00:01:01,960 Speaker 1: Hi guys, and welcome to a new episode of You 15 00:01:02,000 --> 00:01:05,080 Speaker 1: Need Therapy Podcasts. My name is Kat. I am the host, 16 00:01:05,200 --> 00:01:09,039 Speaker 1: and quick reminder before we get into today's episode that 17 00:01:09,440 --> 00:01:12,679 Speaker 1: although I'm a therapist and this podcast is called You 18 00:01:12,720 --> 00:01:16,000 Speaker 1: Need Therapy, and you might need therapy, this podcast does 19 00:01:16,040 --> 00:01:20,320 Speaker 1: not serve as a replacement or a substitute for any 20 00:01:20,360 --> 00:01:23,800 Speaker 1: actual mental health services. However, we hope that it can 21 00:01:23,840 --> 00:01:26,200 Speaker 1: help you at some point wherever you are on your 22 00:01:26,240 --> 00:01:29,679 Speaker 1: journey and wherever you're going now today, this week, we 23 00:01:29,800 --> 00:01:33,600 Speaker 1: are doing something I think is fun. For other people, 24 00:01:33,680 --> 00:01:37,360 Speaker 1: this topic can come as a bit more of a 25 00:01:37,400 --> 00:01:41,720 Speaker 1: complicated situation, and since we are in the season of giving, 26 00:01:42,240 --> 00:01:46,640 Speaker 1: I thought it would be appropriate and also maybe necessary 27 00:01:47,000 --> 00:01:51,400 Speaker 1: to do another gift minded episode. And I say another 28 00:01:51,600 --> 00:01:55,040 Speaker 1: because last year I did one that was more about 29 00:01:55,160 --> 00:01:58,760 Speaker 1: gifts that give back, and this year I thought about 30 00:01:58,800 --> 00:02:01,240 Speaker 1: doing that again, and I even started making the list, 31 00:02:01,240 --> 00:02:03,680 Speaker 1: and I still have that list that I can send 32 00:02:03,720 --> 00:02:07,760 Speaker 1: out to anyone, but I actually opted to focus on 33 00:02:08,200 --> 00:02:12,160 Speaker 1: this year gifts that are good for our mental health. Now, 34 00:02:12,160 --> 00:02:16,440 Speaker 1: if you are someone who suffers from gift purchasing paralysis 35 00:02:17,040 --> 00:02:20,799 Speaker 1: like I sometimes do, this topic might not be as 36 00:02:20,840 --> 00:02:24,320 Speaker 1: exciting and enjoyable as it is to some people. Some 37 00:02:24,360 --> 00:02:27,080 Speaker 1: people just love giving gifts. They get so much joy 38 00:02:27,120 --> 00:02:28,720 Speaker 1: out of it. They can do it all day. They 39 00:02:28,760 --> 00:02:31,799 Speaker 1: don't struggle with what to choose and they just do it. 40 00:02:32,240 --> 00:02:35,600 Speaker 1: But for some people, gift giving can be really overwhelming 41 00:02:36,240 --> 00:02:39,919 Speaker 1: and searching for the in quote perfect gift can be 42 00:02:40,240 --> 00:02:45,280 Speaker 1: paralyzing for many people, and this can end up leaving 43 00:02:45,560 --> 00:02:48,680 Speaker 1: us waiting until the last minute to buy a gift, 44 00:02:49,320 --> 00:02:51,840 Speaker 1: or overthinking it so much that you don't even allow 45 00:02:51,840 --> 00:02:54,600 Speaker 1: yourself to give what you really want to give, and 46 00:02:54,680 --> 00:02:57,880 Speaker 1: so you lose some of the specialness in what makes 47 00:02:58,520 --> 00:03:02,200 Speaker 1: it important coming from you, because you get so wrapped 48 00:03:02,280 --> 00:03:04,800 Speaker 1: up in how somebody's going to receive it, if they'll 49 00:03:04,880 --> 00:03:06,960 Speaker 1: like it, if it's enough, if it's too much. There's 50 00:03:06,960 --> 00:03:09,720 Speaker 1: just so much that goes into that. Now. I really 51 00:03:09,760 --> 00:03:13,040 Speaker 1: do love giving a meaningful gift. I love a sentimental gift. 52 00:03:13,400 --> 00:03:16,560 Speaker 1: I like to get sentimental gifts as well. I also 53 00:03:16,639 --> 00:03:20,360 Speaker 1: like to get silly gifts, simple gifts, and I also 54 00:03:20,520 --> 00:03:23,839 Speaker 1: love giving gifts that people truly, truly, true, truly love. 55 00:03:24,080 --> 00:03:25,920 Speaker 1: I don't know anybody who doesn't like the feeling of 56 00:03:26,080 --> 00:03:28,480 Speaker 1: giving a gift to somebody and knowing that it's really 57 00:03:28,560 --> 00:03:33,040 Speaker 1: really appreciated. But we put I think, way too much 58 00:03:33,080 --> 00:03:37,000 Speaker 1: pressure to obtain that experience and to get that experience, 59 00:03:37,440 --> 00:03:39,120 Speaker 1: and we put a lot of pressure on ourselves and 60 00:03:39,160 --> 00:03:41,960 Speaker 1: forget that for a gift to be meaningful and thoughtful, 61 00:03:42,040 --> 00:03:47,320 Speaker 1: it doesn't have to be perfect. Now, especially if your 62 00:03:47,360 --> 00:03:51,640 Speaker 1: love languages gifts. This topic has a lot to unpack 63 00:03:51,640 --> 00:03:53,160 Speaker 1: and we're not gonna be able to unpack all of it, 64 00:03:53,200 --> 00:03:55,080 Speaker 1: but I did think it was important to at least 65 00:03:55,080 --> 00:03:58,560 Speaker 1: mention it and touch on this stuff, because if you 66 00:03:58,600 --> 00:04:01,640 Speaker 1: are like me, you can actually get really excited about 67 00:04:01,720 --> 00:04:04,040 Speaker 1: Christmas and buying gifts for people and shopping for people, 68 00:04:04,560 --> 00:04:07,480 Speaker 1: and you kind of get in your head about things, 69 00:04:07,600 --> 00:04:10,920 Speaker 1: and you take some of the joy away that you 70 00:04:11,360 --> 00:04:14,840 Speaker 1: deserve to experience during this year and during the experience 71 00:04:14,960 --> 00:04:18,360 Speaker 1: of buying gifts for people that you love. Sometimes when 72 00:04:18,360 --> 00:04:20,279 Speaker 1: you buy a gift for someone, it can kind of 73 00:04:20,320 --> 00:04:23,720 Speaker 1: indicate your feelings about that person. And I'm thinking in 74 00:04:23,760 --> 00:04:28,440 Speaker 1: that case, especially if it's involving a romantic partner, especially 75 00:04:28,440 --> 00:04:32,159 Speaker 1: if it's involving a new romantic partner, and I think 76 00:04:32,240 --> 00:04:36,960 Speaker 1: because of that, it can sometimes feel like it's exposing 77 00:04:37,040 --> 00:04:42,120 Speaker 1: feelings or it can feel like you're saying something through 78 00:04:42,160 --> 00:04:44,720 Speaker 1: a gift that you're giving, and you don't want to 79 00:04:44,760 --> 00:04:46,799 Speaker 1: say too much, but you don't want to say not enough, 80 00:04:46,880 --> 00:04:49,080 Speaker 1: and then you're like, what is this person reading into this? 81 00:04:49,240 --> 00:04:53,520 Speaker 1: What is the symbolize? And like I said, this makes 82 00:04:53,520 --> 00:04:56,760 Speaker 1: me think a lot about new romantic relationships and how 83 00:04:56,760 --> 00:04:59,960 Speaker 1: to decide what's appropriate or not what says too much 84 00:05:00,560 --> 00:05:03,480 Speaker 1: or what says too little. And I find it really 85 00:05:03,520 --> 00:05:08,840 Speaker 1: helpful to be careful and aware of our expectations when 86 00:05:09,200 --> 00:05:12,760 Speaker 1: giving or receiving gifts. They can be saying something. I 87 00:05:12,760 --> 00:05:16,360 Speaker 1: think that's fair, but they are not always saying something. 88 00:05:17,400 --> 00:05:20,640 Speaker 1: Sometimes gifts can be really deep and there is a 89 00:05:20,680 --> 00:05:25,479 Speaker 1: big meaning and importance behind them symbolism. Sometimes they're not 90 00:05:25,640 --> 00:05:28,960 Speaker 1: that deep, and sometimes that's okay. We get to give 91 00:05:29,000 --> 00:05:31,440 Speaker 1: a gift just for the sake of giving it, and 92 00:05:31,480 --> 00:05:33,360 Speaker 1: it doesn't have to mean anything other than I thought 93 00:05:33,360 --> 00:05:36,479 Speaker 1: you would like this. If my love language is gift 94 00:05:36,480 --> 00:05:40,760 Speaker 1: giving and my friends is not, I have to it 95 00:05:40,760 --> 00:05:43,679 Speaker 1: would be important. Now my love language is not gift giving, 96 00:05:43,720 --> 00:05:46,440 Speaker 1: but if it was, I would really need to recognize 97 00:05:46,440 --> 00:05:48,560 Speaker 1: that no matter what reaction I get from my friend, 98 00:05:49,000 --> 00:05:52,359 Speaker 1: I'm still expressing love. I'm still allowed to express love 99 00:05:52,480 --> 00:05:55,520 Speaker 1: through my action and through my gift, regardless of their 100 00:05:56,040 --> 00:05:59,440 Speaker 1: reaction to it. Because if let's say my friend struggles 101 00:05:59,480 --> 00:06:03,159 Speaker 1: receiving it gifts, the reaction she offers in the moment 102 00:06:03,600 --> 00:06:08,800 Speaker 1: might not be about her appreciation or your ability to 103 00:06:08,960 --> 00:06:12,320 Speaker 1: express love through your gift. It's really just about her 104 00:06:12,360 --> 00:06:16,160 Speaker 1: and her own internal working model. People sometimes really struggle 105 00:06:16,279 --> 00:06:20,520 Speaker 1: receiving gifts from people. And if somebody struggles receiving the 106 00:06:20,600 --> 00:06:24,640 Speaker 1: gifts from somebody, it doesn't mean they struggle receiving your 107 00:06:24,680 --> 00:06:27,680 Speaker 1: love from them. And sometimes we write too much into 108 00:06:27,760 --> 00:06:30,960 Speaker 1: that story, and we make up too many stories about that. 109 00:06:31,480 --> 00:06:33,479 Speaker 1: And that's why I say it's important for us to 110 00:06:33,520 --> 00:06:38,440 Speaker 1: be careful and aware of our expectations, because I could 111 00:06:38,440 --> 00:06:41,680 Speaker 1: be setting myself up for failure when I don't have 112 00:06:41,800 --> 00:06:45,359 Speaker 1: to do that. A helpful question to ask when we 113 00:06:45,400 --> 00:06:49,080 Speaker 1: are working ourselves up around choosing gifts is is my 114 00:06:49,160 --> 00:06:53,320 Speaker 1: fear around or about me or the person I'm buying for. 115 00:06:53,920 --> 00:06:57,640 Speaker 1: It's about creating an impression or a narrative that can 116 00:06:57,680 --> 00:06:59,839 Speaker 1: be really good information for you to have. If you 117 00:07:00,120 --> 00:07:03,599 Speaker 1: want somebody to have a certain impression or story or 118 00:07:03,640 --> 00:07:06,600 Speaker 1: thought about you based on this gift, that is something 119 00:07:06,600 --> 00:07:09,039 Speaker 1: that is really important and good information for you to have, 120 00:07:09,480 --> 00:07:13,679 Speaker 1: because we can't make someone think or feel something about us. 121 00:07:14,160 --> 00:07:16,840 Speaker 1: So if we are aware of that, if we're aware 122 00:07:16,880 --> 00:07:20,240 Speaker 1: that we're wanting to create an impression or wanting to 123 00:07:20,360 --> 00:07:24,160 Speaker 1: force a thought from somebody else, then there can be 124 00:07:24,240 --> 00:07:28,040 Speaker 1: some work done around wanting to control perceptions and judgments 125 00:07:28,040 --> 00:07:32,240 Speaker 1: from others because we really don't have the ability to 126 00:07:32,280 --> 00:07:35,080 Speaker 1: do that, And when we try super hard to make 127 00:07:35,120 --> 00:07:38,280 Speaker 1: someone think something about us, we end up not truly 128 00:07:38,320 --> 00:07:42,080 Speaker 1: being our authentic selves. And if gift giving wasn't a 129 00:07:42,120 --> 00:07:46,680 Speaker 1: game in that way, how would your experience change? Then 130 00:07:46,720 --> 00:07:50,280 Speaker 1: we also have to look at in gift giving how 131 00:07:50,320 --> 00:07:53,440 Speaker 1: the paradox of choice sets us up to struggle here. 132 00:07:54,280 --> 00:07:56,520 Speaker 1: I'm sure a lot of you are like me and 133 00:07:56,560 --> 00:07:59,760 Speaker 1: have been stuck on websites like Etsy for hours an 134 00:07:59,760 --> 00:08:04,080 Speaker 1: hours and hours and hours on end, searching for something 135 00:08:04,720 --> 00:08:08,440 Speaker 1: and maybe adding about forty five different things in your 136 00:08:08,480 --> 00:08:12,800 Speaker 1: cart and then ordering nothing. I done that countless times. 137 00:08:12,800 --> 00:08:15,560 Speaker 1: I've done that more than I have actually purchased something 138 00:08:15,600 --> 00:08:19,520 Speaker 1: from Etsy. And the truth and the reality is that 139 00:08:19,560 --> 00:08:22,600 Speaker 1: when we don't know exactly what we're looking for, the 140 00:08:22,600 --> 00:08:25,240 Speaker 1: more options we have, the harder it is for us 141 00:08:25,240 --> 00:08:27,920 Speaker 1: to make a decision. When I was searching for a 142 00:08:27,920 --> 00:08:32,440 Speaker 1: white dress for bridal events earlier this year, I don't 143 00:08:32,440 --> 00:08:34,760 Speaker 1: even want to know how many hours I spent because 144 00:08:35,040 --> 00:08:38,240 Speaker 1: it would bring sadness into my life. I spent so 145 00:08:38,360 --> 00:08:42,680 Speaker 1: many hours on websites like revolve in like Lulu's looking 146 00:08:42,720 --> 00:08:45,800 Speaker 1: for what I wanted to be the perfect dress, I 147 00:08:45,880 --> 00:08:49,000 Speaker 1: mean hours, and these websites have pages and pages and 148 00:08:49,040 --> 00:08:54,520 Speaker 1: pages and pages, a bajillion pages, hundreds of options, and 149 00:08:54,800 --> 00:08:57,280 Speaker 1: needless to say, I never bought anything from any of 150 00:08:57,320 --> 00:09:01,520 Speaker 1: those stores. I became really, really over whelmed, and at 151 00:09:01,559 --> 00:09:04,360 Speaker 1: one point I was not even able to distinguish if 152 00:09:04,400 --> 00:09:08,120 Speaker 1: I liked something or not. And then I couldn't choose 153 00:09:08,160 --> 00:09:10,800 Speaker 1: because there are so many options that ended up in 154 00:09:10,800 --> 00:09:12,240 Speaker 1: my cart that I would just click out of the 155 00:09:12,280 --> 00:09:16,720 Speaker 1: website and not go back. And similarly, I was at 156 00:09:16,760 --> 00:09:19,480 Speaker 1: the mall a couple of weeks ago and we walked 157 00:09:19,559 --> 00:09:23,000 Speaker 1: past Aritzia, and Patrick didn't know what that store was, 158 00:09:23,040 --> 00:09:24,920 Speaker 1: and I think he may have been liked, you want 159 00:09:24,920 --> 00:09:26,480 Speaker 1: to go in there? And I said, no, I cannot 160 00:09:26,480 --> 00:09:29,400 Speaker 1: go even go into that store, because stores like that 161 00:09:29,559 --> 00:09:33,320 Speaker 1: have so many options of basically the same thing, but 162 00:09:33,400 --> 00:09:38,720 Speaker 1: with like an iota of a differentiation of it, Like 163 00:09:38,760 --> 00:09:40,280 Speaker 1: if you want a white T shirt, they have five 164 00:09:40,360 --> 00:09:45,640 Speaker 1: hundred different kinds, and again it creates that analysis paralysis 165 00:09:45,679 --> 00:09:48,040 Speaker 1: where you can't decide what you want. I need to 166 00:09:48,080 --> 00:09:50,400 Speaker 1: go into a store that has two white T shirts 167 00:09:50,600 --> 00:09:52,520 Speaker 1: and I could decide which one I want that's it, 168 00:09:53,120 --> 00:09:56,400 Speaker 1: and that plays into gift giving, right, So if that's 169 00:09:56,400 --> 00:09:59,079 Speaker 1: happening with me and my experience of buying things for myself, 170 00:09:59,080 --> 00:10:01,400 Speaker 1: it's going to play out to my experience of buying 171 00:10:01,440 --> 00:10:04,120 Speaker 1: things for others too. So when we're searching for a 172 00:10:04,120 --> 00:10:06,840 Speaker 1: gift for someone else and we aren't exactly sure what 173 00:10:06,840 --> 00:10:10,320 Speaker 1: we want to give them, or we just know we 174 00:10:10,360 --> 00:10:13,520 Speaker 1: want it to be perfect, it basically makes it impossible 175 00:10:13,559 --> 00:10:17,600 Speaker 1: to choose and be satisfied because there are so many options. 176 00:10:17,640 --> 00:10:19,480 Speaker 1: They're endless, and so how do I know if this 177 00:10:19,520 --> 00:10:22,360 Speaker 1: is the right one? And knowing that and thinking about 178 00:10:22,360 --> 00:10:27,560 Speaker 1: that brings up memories that I have. They feel ridiculous. 179 00:10:27,600 --> 00:10:29,680 Speaker 1: But when I was younger, when I was a kid, 180 00:10:29,800 --> 00:10:34,079 Speaker 1: I would make these extensive Christmas and Birthday lists from 181 00:10:34,120 --> 00:10:38,120 Speaker 1: my parents and they were so exact. I told them 182 00:10:38,120 --> 00:10:41,800 Speaker 1: exactly what I wanted. And at the same time, I 183 00:10:41,960 --> 00:10:44,760 Speaker 1: want to honestly text my parents and be like, you're 184 00:10:44,800 --> 00:10:48,560 Speaker 1: welcome for making buying me gifts so easy. As a child, 185 00:10:48,679 --> 00:10:51,319 Speaker 1: because there was no second guessing, I would go ahead 186 00:10:51,360 --> 00:10:54,640 Speaker 1: and make my wish list on diliaz dot com, print 187 00:10:54,640 --> 00:10:56,960 Speaker 1: it out, and hand it right to them directly. This 188 00:10:57,000 --> 00:10:58,640 Speaker 1: is what I want for Christmas, this is what I 189 00:10:58,679 --> 00:11:02,520 Speaker 1: want for my birthday. There was no confusion and that 190 00:11:02,640 --> 00:11:04,440 Speaker 1: was really great for them back then, other than the 191 00:11:04,440 --> 00:11:08,400 Speaker 1: fact that I probably asked for too much money's worth 192 00:11:08,400 --> 00:11:11,040 Speaker 1: of items, but they knew if they picked something off 193 00:11:11,040 --> 00:11:14,640 Speaker 1: that list, I would be happy. And if you have 194 00:11:14,720 --> 00:11:16,800 Speaker 1: somebody on your list this year, or just in your 195 00:11:16,800 --> 00:11:20,160 Speaker 1: life in general, buying gifts at any moment, and they 196 00:11:20,160 --> 00:11:22,319 Speaker 1: haven't been gracious enough like I was as a child, 197 00:11:22,360 --> 00:11:24,400 Speaker 1: to hand you a detailed list of things they would 198 00:11:24,400 --> 00:11:27,800 Speaker 1: like to receive, it is okay to make things simple. 199 00:11:28,679 --> 00:11:33,040 Speaker 1: And what I really want people to hear this year 200 00:11:33,320 --> 00:11:37,200 Speaker 1: and their gift giving is that extravagant, expensive and time 201 00:11:37,240 --> 00:11:41,440 Speaker 1: consuming doesn't make a gift better. I actually have two 202 00:11:41,480 --> 00:11:45,320 Speaker 1: things that I think about when I am buying gifts 203 00:11:45,320 --> 00:11:48,000 Speaker 1: for people that have made it really easy for me 204 00:11:48,080 --> 00:11:52,160 Speaker 1: to choose things at times, and that is I think 205 00:11:52,160 --> 00:11:56,160 Speaker 1: about products that I love. So gifting somebody a product 206 00:11:56,240 --> 00:12:00,400 Speaker 1: that has been helpful for me or I just liked 207 00:12:00,720 --> 00:12:03,800 Speaker 1: or has meant something to me, I go down that 208 00:12:03,880 --> 00:12:06,720 Speaker 1: route and I think of things that just make me 209 00:12:06,760 --> 00:12:09,160 Speaker 1: think of them, and that might not be the most 210 00:12:09,160 --> 00:12:11,720 Speaker 1: expensive thing, that might not be the most original thing 211 00:12:11,760 --> 00:12:15,240 Speaker 1: that might not be the most personalized thing, but it's 212 00:12:15,280 --> 00:12:18,679 Speaker 1: something that made me think of them. I bought a 213 00:12:18,720 --> 00:12:21,559 Speaker 1: deck of cards they were called like how to Speak 214 00:12:21,600 --> 00:12:25,520 Speaker 1: in cat for a friend this year because I was 215 00:12:25,559 --> 00:12:27,560 Speaker 1: just walking through a gift shop and I saw them, 216 00:12:27,559 --> 00:12:29,240 Speaker 1: and I also knew that their birthday was coming up, 217 00:12:29,840 --> 00:12:32,920 Speaker 1: and they were probably like twelve bucks or something like that, 218 00:12:33,559 --> 00:12:35,680 Speaker 1: but it was a gift that I immediately thought of 219 00:12:35,720 --> 00:12:37,280 Speaker 1: that person. I was like, Oh, this is what I'm 220 00:12:37,320 --> 00:12:40,439 Speaker 1: getting for them. Now, do I know if this person 221 00:12:40,480 --> 00:12:43,200 Speaker 1: is using those cards every day? No, they probably shoved 222 00:12:43,200 --> 00:12:46,560 Speaker 1: in a door somewhere. However, it feels really good to 223 00:12:46,600 --> 00:12:52,079 Speaker 1: receive something that wasn't just something random that they picked 224 00:12:52,080 --> 00:12:54,000 Speaker 1: out of a bag, but it was a Oh, that 225 00:12:54,720 --> 00:12:58,160 Speaker 1: is for so and so and so, I am going 226 00:12:58,240 --> 00:13:03,000 Speaker 1: to offer you a gift this year, and that is 227 00:13:03,200 --> 00:13:07,520 Speaker 1: a list of products that I love, specifically a list 228 00:13:07,559 --> 00:13:10,880 Speaker 1: of products that I love that also promote mental health, 229 00:13:11,040 --> 00:13:15,000 Speaker 1: well being, and healthier relationships. So these are gifts that 230 00:13:15,000 --> 00:13:17,400 Speaker 1: could be great for anyone, regardless if you know the 231 00:13:17,440 --> 00:13:21,280 Speaker 1: status of their mental health or not. And I actually 232 00:13:21,440 --> 00:13:24,040 Speaker 1: made a tab on my Amazon storefront page where you 233 00:13:24,040 --> 00:13:26,160 Speaker 1: can go and find a lot of these gifts and 234 00:13:26,200 --> 00:13:28,920 Speaker 1: the ones that are not on Amazon, I'm going to 235 00:13:29,080 --> 00:13:31,760 Speaker 1: just link the websites to those gifts in the show notes, 236 00:13:31,840 --> 00:13:35,000 Speaker 1: so if anything speaks out to you, you can just 237 00:13:35,200 --> 00:13:39,080 Speaker 1: easily access them there. And these, again, are all things 238 00:13:39,080 --> 00:13:42,240 Speaker 1: that I appreciate and I like. They're not random things 239 00:13:42,240 --> 00:13:45,359 Speaker 1: that I googled. They are things that I've either received, 240 00:13:45,520 --> 00:13:47,520 Speaker 1: things that I've used, or things that I have given 241 00:13:47,559 --> 00:13:49,960 Speaker 1: to others. A lot of things that I actually have 242 00:13:50,080 --> 00:13:53,280 Speaker 1: in my office or at my house. So hopefully this 243 00:13:53,360 --> 00:13:56,080 Speaker 1: list helps simplify gift giving for you this year and 244 00:13:56,240 --> 00:13:58,920 Speaker 1: allows it to be less about making sure you get 245 00:13:58,920 --> 00:14:01,200 Speaker 1: the perfect gift for somebody and making sure you leave 246 00:14:01,240 --> 00:14:04,439 Speaker 1: the perfect impression, and allow it to be more about 247 00:14:04,480 --> 00:14:07,120 Speaker 1: just doing something kind for somebody and letting somebody know 248 00:14:07,160 --> 00:14:09,400 Speaker 1: that you care about them by going out of your 249 00:14:09,440 --> 00:14:12,160 Speaker 1: way and getting something for them like that alone is 250 00:14:12,200 --> 00:14:21,640 Speaker 1: meaningful and thoughtful. So here's my list. The first thing 251 00:14:21,640 --> 00:14:23,680 Speaker 1: on my list is probably going to be no surprise 252 00:14:23,720 --> 00:14:26,400 Speaker 1: to anybody if you have been a long time listener, 253 00:14:26,480 --> 00:14:30,040 Speaker 1: because I'm sure I've mentioned these multiple times, but conversation cards. 254 00:14:30,200 --> 00:14:33,240 Speaker 1: So the past couple of years conversation cards have really 255 00:14:33,280 --> 00:14:35,880 Speaker 1: really taken off. And what I mean by conversation cards 256 00:14:35,920 --> 00:14:38,960 Speaker 1: are these decks that have been created by different people, 257 00:14:39,040 --> 00:14:43,640 Speaker 1: various people that can be used with friends or partners, 258 00:14:43,760 --> 00:14:47,120 Speaker 1: or dating or just really in any scenario to help 259 00:14:47,160 --> 00:14:50,360 Speaker 1: prompt conversations and ask questions that might not naturally come 260 00:14:50,440 --> 00:14:55,160 Speaker 1: up in everyday conversation and really allows your brain to 261 00:14:55,200 --> 00:14:58,280 Speaker 1: start thinking differently and can take you down different tangents 262 00:14:58,320 --> 00:15:01,760 Speaker 1: that you might not naturally go and it's just fun. 263 00:15:01,800 --> 00:15:04,840 Speaker 1: I think for a lot of times these cards. I 264 00:15:04,920 --> 00:15:09,560 Speaker 1: have a deck called Concrete Conversations, and they have different 265 00:15:09,680 --> 00:15:12,840 Speaker 1: kinds of decks, like ones for friends, one for relationships, 266 00:15:13,280 --> 00:15:15,320 Speaker 1: so you can pick which one would be appropriate based 267 00:15:15,320 --> 00:15:18,080 Speaker 1: on the person you're giving. I really like those cards, 268 00:15:18,200 --> 00:15:21,480 Speaker 1: and they are things that I have used on vacations, 269 00:15:21,880 --> 00:15:25,160 Speaker 1: just border around the house. I've used them with clients 270 00:15:25,320 --> 00:15:29,680 Speaker 1: to help prompt them with certain things, and I really 271 00:15:29,760 --> 00:15:33,400 Speaker 1: love those, So Concrete Conversations for a friend. I'm also 272 00:15:33,400 --> 00:15:36,440 Speaker 1: a big fan of the Friendship deck, which was created 273 00:15:36,480 --> 00:15:41,440 Speaker 1: by a former guest of the podcast Bake Blake and Beckler, 274 00:15:41,960 --> 00:15:44,720 Speaker 1: who has a tongue twister of a name, but she 275 00:15:44,800 --> 00:15:48,239 Speaker 1: created the Friendship Deck as a way to deepen friendships 276 00:15:48,320 --> 00:15:51,600 Speaker 1: and really allow friendships to become more vulnerable and just 277 00:15:51,640 --> 00:15:54,600 Speaker 1: get places that you would normally go to create more 278 00:15:54,640 --> 00:15:58,680 Speaker 1: meaningful relationships. And I love them, so I'm gonna link 279 00:15:58,720 --> 00:16:01,280 Speaker 1: those as well. I also link the episode that Blake 280 00:16:01,360 --> 00:16:03,040 Speaker 1: was in in case you guys want to listen to that. 281 00:16:04,000 --> 00:16:07,520 Speaker 1: And if you're looking for more of a game type feel, 282 00:16:08,560 --> 00:16:12,000 Speaker 1: you can also get Where Should We Begin, which is 283 00:16:12,160 --> 00:16:17,000 Speaker 1: a storytelling slash conversation game created by Esta Perell who's 284 00:16:17,120 --> 00:16:22,280 Speaker 1: a relationship couple's therapists, and that makes these conversations more 285 00:16:22,280 --> 00:16:25,080 Speaker 1: into a game which can at a different element and 286 00:16:25,200 --> 00:16:28,480 Speaker 1: be really fun. So my first idea conversation cards. They 287 00:16:28,480 --> 00:16:31,080 Speaker 1: could be good for anybody, and I love them for 288 00:16:31,120 --> 00:16:36,000 Speaker 1: myself as well. Moving on to number two, affirmation cards. 289 00:16:36,200 --> 00:16:39,320 Speaker 1: So I'm talking about more cards. This is similar to 290 00:16:39,400 --> 00:16:42,400 Speaker 1: conversation cards and that one it's a deck of cards, 291 00:16:42,440 --> 00:16:44,640 Speaker 1: but two there's a million of these kinds of things 292 00:16:44,640 --> 00:16:47,360 Speaker 1: to choose from, So I'm going to make this easy 293 00:16:47,360 --> 00:16:51,640 Speaker 1: for you. Like I said, my favorite type of affirmation 294 00:16:51,760 --> 00:16:56,160 Speaker 1: cards will always be affirmators. I have given these to 295 00:16:56,240 --> 00:16:58,120 Speaker 1: so many people that I can't give them to people 296 00:16:58,160 --> 00:17:00,480 Speaker 1: anymore because I don't know who I've already gifted them too. 297 00:17:01,040 --> 00:17:04,080 Speaker 1: But they are just these affirmation cards that also are 298 00:17:04,119 --> 00:17:07,440 Speaker 1: a little silly, and so they can brighten your way intwo. 299 00:17:07,720 --> 00:17:09,600 Speaker 1: For example, I'm gonna pull a couple of them. So 300 00:17:10,040 --> 00:17:15,560 Speaker 1: here's one. It says power, and underneath the word power, 301 00:17:15,640 --> 00:17:18,800 Speaker 1: it says, I am strong, I am grounded, I am powerful. 302 00:17:19,280 --> 00:17:22,320 Speaker 1: I am like a cross between a dinosaur and a tank, 303 00:17:22,880 --> 00:17:25,280 Speaker 1: but not a tank that is used for war. I 304 00:17:25,320 --> 00:17:29,080 Speaker 1: am like a peaceful, loving dino tank who feels so 305 00:17:29,240 --> 00:17:31,760 Speaker 1: strong and it doesn't need to do anything but be. 306 00:17:32,960 --> 00:17:35,640 Speaker 1: And then here's another one. This one says don't take 307 00:17:35,680 --> 00:17:39,760 Speaker 1: it personally, and underneath that it says, if someone starts 308 00:17:39,800 --> 00:17:42,520 Speaker 1: to speak unkindly to me, I'll remember that they've got 309 00:17:42,520 --> 00:17:45,080 Speaker 1: something going on that has nothing to do with me, 310 00:17:45,680 --> 00:17:49,399 Speaker 1: Like maybe they just poop their pants. Yeah, that's probably it. 311 00:17:50,560 --> 00:17:53,240 Speaker 1: So you see, they're just like silly, but also they 312 00:17:53,600 --> 00:17:55,800 Speaker 1: will bring a smile to your face, but also they're 313 00:17:55,880 --> 00:17:59,000 Speaker 1: helpful and they say things that actually are true and 314 00:17:59,040 --> 00:18:02,560 Speaker 1: that we need to hear some times. If affirmators are 315 00:18:02,600 --> 00:18:05,440 Speaker 1: not your jam, you can also get the you got 316 00:18:05,480 --> 00:18:08,520 Speaker 1: this cards, which is a deck of cards with different 317 00:18:08,560 --> 00:18:11,639 Speaker 1: quotes on each card, and that one is a great gift, 318 00:18:11,680 --> 00:18:14,720 Speaker 1: I think for anybody who's going through something really tough, 319 00:18:14,960 --> 00:18:17,879 Speaker 1: or somebody who's starting something new. It's just an encouragement. 320 00:18:17,960 --> 00:18:22,840 Speaker 1: You got this our next gift number three weighted blanket. 321 00:18:23,119 --> 00:18:25,359 Speaker 1: So I have had one of these in my office 322 00:18:25,440 --> 00:18:29,000 Speaker 1: since literally forever, and I love having it as a 323 00:18:29,040 --> 00:18:31,679 Speaker 1: resource for clients when they're feeling anxious or having a 324 00:18:31,720 --> 00:18:36,560 Speaker 1: hard time just grounding themselves in whatever we're doing in session. 325 00:18:37,440 --> 00:18:39,520 Speaker 1: And then I never had one in my house, but 326 00:18:39,680 --> 00:18:41,480 Speaker 1: a couple of years ago, my mom bought me one 327 00:18:42,080 --> 00:18:45,320 Speaker 1: for my birthday randomly. I didn't even give her a 328 00:18:45,359 --> 00:18:46,760 Speaker 1: list of things they wanted, and she bought it for 329 00:18:46,840 --> 00:18:49,760 Speaker 1: me randomly, and it's honestly one of the best things 330 00:18:49,760 --> 00:18:53,000 Speaker 1: she's ever given me. And if you struggle with sleeping 331 00:18:53,040 --> 00:18:57,880 Speaker 1: in general, it's amazing. Plus it's just like cozy and 332 00:18:58,440 --> 00:19:01,240 Speaker 1: like everything else, there is a million different kinds, brands, 333 00:19:01,720 --> 00:19:05,440 Speaker 1: styles all of that. I have a large knitted one 334 00:19:05,920 --> 00:19:09,480 Speaker 1: and I love that because one, it looks nice in 335 00:19:09,520 --> 00:19:12,760 Speaker 1: the home, and it also doesn't make you super hot 336 00:19:12,760 --> 00:19:14,960 Speaker 1: because there's a lot of holes in it, so you 337 00:19:15,000 --> 00:19:16,600 Speaker 1: can use it anytime of the year. I can use 338 00:19:16,600 --> 00:19:18,040 Speaker 1: it in the summer, or I can just put it 339 00:19:18,080 --> 00:19:21,639 Speaker 1: over top of my blanket in the winter. Mine is 340 00:19:21,640 --> 00:19:24,920 Speaker 1: about fifteen pounds and I wouldn't really want anything heavier 341 00:19:24,960 --> 00:19:27,520 Speaker 1: than that. But you can also get heavier ones, and 342 00:19:27,560 --> 00:19:30,320 Speaker 1: you can also get lighter ones for kids, and I 343 00:19:30,359 --> 00:19:32,399 Speaker 1: have linked the one I have on my Amazon page. 344 00:19:32,960 --> 00:19:36,080 Speaker 1: They're a little bit more pricey than affirmation cards. But 345 00:19:36,240 --> 00:19:38,920 Speaker 1: if you are buying a gift, and more expensive gift, 346 00:19:38,960 --> 00:19:43,199 Speaker 1: I really do strongly suggest this as something that you 347 00:19:43,400 --> 00:19:47,720 Speaker 1: look for. Now number four we're going back down in 348 00:19:48,040 --> 00:19:51,800 Speaker 1: the expensive category because number four is just cozy socks. 349 00:19:51,920 --> 00:19:55,040 Speaker 1: And to some people this might seem like the lame gift. 350 00:19:55,320 --> 00:19:59,280 Speaker 1: But I actually asked for socks this year, not specifically, 351 00:19:59,320 --> 00:20:02,239 Speaker 1: but I just said randomly to Patrick, which he has 352 00:20:02,240 --> 00:20:04,200 Speaker 1: a list of things when I say things, which I 353 00:20:04,240 --> 00:20:05,960 Speaker 1: think is really cute. But when I mention things that 354 00:20:06,000 --> 00:20:08,760 Speaker 1: I want or that I need, he writes it down 355 00:20:08,800 --> 00:20:10,720 Speaker 1: in his phone so he can go to that later 356 00:20:10,760 --> 00:20:16,760 Speaker 1: when he is getting paralysis from gift giving. But I 357 00:20:16,800 --> 00:20:18,920 Speaker 1: told him I wanted socks this year. I was like, 358 00:20:18,920 --> 00:20:21,440 Speaker 1: if you ever just want to buy me something, give 359 00:20:21,480 --> 00:20:24,440 Speaker 1: me some socks. And there are two kinds that I 360 00:20:24,520 --> 00:20:29,359 Speaker 1: specifically love, Barefoot Dreams socks and Bomba socks. I like 361 00:20:29,400 --> 00:20:33,080 Speaker 1: the Barefoot Dreams for lounging at home with my weighted blanket, 362 00:20:33,760 --> 00:20:36,560 Speaker 1: and then the bombas for like every day and for 363 00:20:36,760 --> 00:20:40,000 Speaker 1: working out and stuff. And a big part of taking 364 00:20:40,000 --> 00:20:42,679 Speaker 1: care of our mental health is finding comfort and this 365 00:20:42,760 --> 00:20:46,560 Speaker 1: is a very practical, inexpensive, and easy way to do that. 366 00:20:47,440 --> 00:20:49,800 Speaker 1: I think we need to put more respect on the 367 00:20:49,840 --> 00:20:52,639 Speaker 1: gift of socks. We need some more justice for the 368 00:20:52,680 --> 00:20:57,120 Speaker 1: gift of socks, because I personally love getting a pair 369 00:20:57,160 --> 00:21:00,360 Speaker 1: of socks, a pair of good socks. One of those 370 00:21:00,400 --> 00:21:01,760 Speaker 1: things that you don't really want to spend a lot 371 00:21:01,800 --> 00:21:05,160 Speaker 1: of money on yourself, but you like to get from 372 00:21:05,240 --> 00:21:09,240 Speaker 1: other people. So you know, when in college, I remember 373 00:21:09,240 --> 00:21:11,560 Speaker 1: when I had to like buy shampoo or toilet paper 374 00:21:11,640 --> 00:21:13,040 Speaker 1: or any of those kind of things that you're like 375 00:21:13,080 --> 00:21:15,400 Speaker 1: annoyed having to spend your money on. I would get 376 00:21:15,440 --> 00:21:18,000 Speaker 1: like literally the cheapest thing I could get. But when 377 00:21:18,080 --> 00:21:21,760 Speaker 1: like my mom was in town taking me shopping for 378 00:21:21,880 --> 00:21:24,080 Speaker 1: things that I need, I would like splurge and get 379 00:21:24,080 --> 00:21:26,919 Speaker 1: the good stuff. And that was mostly not because I 380 00:21:26,960 --> 00:21:29,640 Speaker 1: was taking advantage of her. But because I actually did 381 00:21:29,640 --> 00:21:31,159 Speaker 1: not have the money to spend on any of that 382 00:21:31,200 --> 00:21:34,000 Speaker 1: stuff at the time, maybe I was taking it a 383 00:21:34,040 --> 00:21:37,320 Speaker 1: little bit advantage of her kindness, but we can process 384 00:21:37,320 --> 00:21:40,560 Speaker 1: that later anyway. It's the same thing with socks, Like 385 00:21:40,680 --> 00:21:42,320 Speaker 1: it's one of those things. If you need new socks, 386 00:21:42,359 --> 00:21:45,800 Speaker 1: you're like, oh, okay, I'll just get these. Are socks 387 00:21:45,800 --> 00:21:48,520 Speaker 1: that important? But if somebody's like, what kind of socks 388 00:21:48,520 --> 00:21:50,480 Speaker 1: do you want, You're like, oh, I want the kind 389 00:21:50,480 --> 00:21:53,240 Speaker 1: that are twenty dollars a pair. And I don't necessarily 390 00:21:53,280 --> 00:21:55,440 Speaker 1: think that Bambas are twenty five dollars a pair. I'm 391 00:21:55,480 --> 00:21:58,320 Speaker 1: not sure exactly how much they are. However, I do 392 00:21:58,480 --> 00:22:01,879 Speaker 1: know that they have a giving back initiative where every 393 00:22:01,880 --> 00:22:05,679 Speaker 1: item that is purchased, they actually donate an item to 394 00:22:05,720 --> 00:22:09,480 Speaker 1: somebody in need. Plus right now as I am saying this, 395 00:22:10,080 --> 00:22:11,640 Speaker 1: so I don't know if it's still going on, they 396 00:22:11,640 --> 00:22:13,680 Speaker 1: are doing a sale on their website and it's twenty 397 00:22:13,680 --> 00:22:16,440 Speaker 1: percent off of your entire purchase when you use the 398 00:22:16,480 --> 00:22:19,480 Speaker 1: code that's on their website, which is Comfort twenty. And 399 00:22:19,880 --> 00:22:21,399 Speaker 1: I'm just saying that has nothing to do with me. 400 00:22:21,480 --> 00:22:23,960 Speaker 1: I just googled the website and it was on the website, 401 00:22:24,520 --> 00:22:27,520 Speaker 1: so hopefully that's still happening. When you guys listen to 402 00:22:27,560 --> 00:22:30,920 Speaker 1: this and you can take advantage of that because they 403 00:22:30,920 --> 00:22:34,560 Speaker 1: are really the best socks. And if you know, you know, 404 00:22:34,920 --> 00:22:36,960 Speaker 1: and if you don't know, maybe you can get some 405 00:22:37,119 --> 00:22:38,719 Speaker 1: and then you will be in the know, and then 406 00:22:38,760 --> 00:22:40,520 Speaker 1: you'll want to gift them to people in the future. 407 00:22:46,720 --> 00:22:50,560 Speaker 1: Number five coloring books and pens. And yes, if you 408 00:22:50,640 --> 00:22:53,399 Speaker 1: are like, what is as for our children, sure you 409 00:22:53,440 --> 00:22:56,240 Speaker 1: can get that for your children. Also, adult coloring books 410 00:22:56,240 --> 00:22:59,040 Speaker 1: are a thing, and they are such a helpful self 411 00:22:59,160 --> 00:23:03,080 Speaker 1: soothing tool and something that a lot of times people 412 00:23:03,080 --> 00:23:04,760 Speaker 1: don't know that they need or want until they have 413 00:23:04,840 --> 00:23:07,920 Speaker 1: them as well. And they are also great when you're 414 00:23:07,960 --> 00:23:11,480 Speaker 1: traveling and if you're someone who either doesn't like to 415 00:23:11,560 --> 00:23:15,320 Speaker 1: read or somebody who can't read while moving. I know 416 00:23:15,400 --> 00:23:17,879 Speaker 1: I can't read while in like a bus or a 417 00:23:17,920 --> 00:23:20,280 Speaker 1: car or anything like that, but I can color, and 418 00:23:20,320 --> 00:23:23,240 Speaker 1: it is something that can be really helpful to one 419 00:23:23,280 --> 00:23:27,280 Speaker 1: past time. But also it's a really good resource for 420 00:23:27,359 --> 00:23:31,200 Speaker 1: people who need to create some self soothing practices in 421 00:23:31,240 --> 00:23:34,199 Speaker 1: their lives. So coloring books and pens. I have some 422 00:23:34,240 --> 00:23:38,200 Speaker 1: of those in that Amazon page as well. Next, a diffuser, 423 00:23:38,800 --> 00:23:42,480 Speaker 1: and I found this year the cutest diffuser. It looks 424 00:23:42,520 --> 00:23:44,679 Speaker 1: really nice. It's not like an eyesore. I think some 425 00:23:44,760 --> 00:23:47,000 Speaker 1: of them can just like be bulky and take up space. 426 00:23:47,520 --> 00:23:50,399 Speaker 1: But I found one that I really liked and I 427 00:23:50,440 --> 00:23:52,920 Speaker 1: have that in my office. I tried out the pure diffuser, 428 00:23:52,960 --> 00:23:55,000 Speaker 1: which is the one that plugs into the wall and 429 00:23:55,400 --> 00:23:58,439 Speaker 1: you can control it from your phone, and I like 430 00:23:58,480 --> 00:24:01,840 Speaker 1: the sense, but it's not a exactly like an essential 431 00:24:01,880 --> 00:24:06,160 Speaker 1: oil diffuser where you get to actually have the experience 432 00:24:06,200 --> 00:24:10,480 Speaker 1: of the light and the steam and the real essential 433 00:24:10,480 --> 00:24:12,560 Speaker 1: oil is coming out of it. It just feels very different 434 00:24:12,720 --> 00:24:16,639 Speaker 1: and creates a different vibe. So I highly recommend a 435 00:24:16,880 --> 00:24:20,560 Speaker 1: essential oil diffuser. There are tons of those on Amazon. 436 00:24:20,720 --> 00:24:23,440 Speaker 1: I again, to make this easier for you, have put 437 00:24:23,680 --> 00:24:25,480 Speaker 1: the one that I got in my office on that 438 00:24:25,560 --> 00:24:28,959 Speaker 1: page and then the next one. Seven. This is going 439 00:24:29,000 --> 00:24:31,480 Speaker 1: to be a weird idea, but I also think it's 440 00:24:31,720 --> 00:24:34,000 Speaker 1: a really good idea at the same time. And it 441 00:24:34,040 --> 00:24:39,120 Speaker 1: is a cute medicine pill case. And I like this 442 00:24:39,200 --> 00:24:44,280 Speaker 1: because it normalizes medication and it's very unexpected. So this 443 00:24:44,400 --> 00:24:46,000 Speaker 1: might be a gift that you give to somebody that 444 00:24:46,080 --> 00:24:49,639 Speaker 1: you maybe know takes medication and also can be a 445 00:24:49,680 --> 00:24:51,560 Speaker 1: gift for somebody who struggles to remember to take their 446 00:24:51,600 --> 00:24:55,160 Speaker 1: medication too, because that can help them kind of remember 447 00:24:55,200 --> 00:24:57,000 Speaker 1: if they did or didn't do it that day, because 448 00:24:57,040 --> 00:24:59,600 Speaker 1: that can be a thing. But it also I just 449 00:24:59,600 --> 00:25:02,360 Speaker 1: like the idea that it normalizes it and it's okay 450 00:25:02,520 --> 00:25:06,040 Speaker 1: to want to make your pillcase fashionable. It makes it 451 00:25:06,080 --> 00:25:07,600 Speaker 1: a little bit more fun if it feels like a 452 00:25:07,680 --> 00:25:12,080 Speaker 1: drag so cute. Medicine case number eight, which is the 453 00:25:12,119 --> 00:25:16,760 Speaker 1: second to last idea, is essentially a tea slash, tea 454 00:25:16,840 --> 00:25:21,719 Speaker 1: pot and other temperature soothing things, And what I mean 455 00:25:21,800 --> 00:25:23,840 Speaker 1: by that is one of the things that I recommend 456 00:25:23,840 --> 00:25:25,640 Speaker 1: to clients. Are some of the things that I recommend 457 00:25:25,640 --> 00:25:29,280 Speaker 1: to clients often for ways to self soothe and regulate 458 00:25:29,960 --> 00:25:35,200 Speaker 1: heavy or overwhelming emotions and feelings at home include things 459 00:25:35,240 --> 00:25:38,840 Speaker 1: like face masks that have a cooling effect, ice rollers, 460 00:25:39,560 --> 00:25:42,880 Speaker 1: or hot tea. And the tea is helpful because it's 461 00:25:42,880 --> 00:25:45,600 Speaker 1: a warm sensation that you can kind of move your 462 00:25:45,640 --> 00:25:49,760 Speaker 1: brain from emotional to physical sensation and focus on that 463 00:25:49,840 --> 00:25:53,200 Speaker 1: and help you stay present. It also has the aromatherapy 464 00:25:53,240 --> 00:25:56,479 Speaker 1: part too, so it's creating two physical sensations that can 465 00:25:56,520 --> 00:25:59,560 Speaker 1: pull you out of that really emotional spiral, so I 466 00:25:59,600 --> 00:26:03,760 Speaker 1: love it. I've linked a couple teapots on that page. 467 00:26:04,320 --> 00:26:07,240 Speaker 1: One of them is the one that I was actually 468 00:26:07,240 --> 00:26:09,760 Speaker 1: gifted a year ago as a house oring gift, and 469 00:26:10,520 --> 00:26:12,640 Speaker 1: it is really cute. It has like one of these 470 00:26:12,720 --> 00:26:15,359 Speaker 1: long spout neck things. I don't know what you call that, 471 00:26:15,920 --> 00:26:18,080 Speaker 1: but it kind of makes making tea fun, you know, 472 00:26:18,320 --> 00:26:21,840 Speaker 1: because the little spout thing is cool to pour out of. 473 00:26:22,520 --> 00:26:25,040 Speaker 1: I think I like to find joy in the little things. 474 00:26:25,119 --> 00:26:28,440 Speaker 1: And then I've also linked a couple face mass and iemass, 475 00:26:28,440 --> 00:26:30,359 Speaker 1: but really, any of those kinds of things, it doesn't 476 00:26:30,400 --> 00:26:34,119 Speaker 1: matter which one it is. If it cools, then that's great. 477 00:26:34,240 --> 00:26:37,600 Speaker 1: If the teapot gets hot, then that's great. That's really 478 00:26:37,600 --> 00:26:39,119 Speaker 1: all we're looking for. We don't have to make it 479 00:26:39,160 --> 00:26:45,080 Speaker 1: super complicated. So temperature regulating things is number eight on 480 00:26:45,119 --> 00:26:48,560 Speaker 1: my list. And then my last thing, I've combined two 481 00:26:48,640 --> 00:26:52,360 Speaker 1: things kind of and really there are two companies that 482 00:26:52,720 --> 00:26:56,520 Speaker 1: both have missions that I really love and can stand behind, 483 00:26:57,119 --> 00:26:59,959 Speaker 1: and I group them together because the gift idea is 484 00:27:00,119 --> 00:27:03,720 Speaker 1: very similar. So the companies are the giving keys and 485 00:27:03,960 --> 00:27:06,240 Speaker 1: Able and I'm not sure if they are both on 486 00:27:06,280 --> 00:27:08,399 Speaker 1: the list last year, because they both give back and 487 00:27:08,440 --> 00:27:11,199 Speaker 1: they both have really strong missions that I believe in. 488 00:27:12,119 --> 00:27:17,439 Speaker 1: The Giving Keys started as stamped keys with words like strong, brave, believe, 489 00:27:17,920 --> 00:27:22,520 Speaker 1: et cetera. And the goal behind these was to gift 490 00:27:22,880 --> 00:27:26,360 Speaker 1: a necklace to somebody that had a word that might 491 00:27:26,440 --> 00:27:28,880 Speaker 1: mean somebody, that person that you think that person might need, 492 00:27:29,600 --> 00:27:33,280 Speaker 1: and eventually that person then would give that necklace to 493 00:27:33,320 --> 00:27:36,280 Speaker 1: somebody else, So it just continues to cycle through people 494 00:27:36,359 --> 00:27:39,240 Speaker 1: that need it. And I really like that they actually 495 00:27:39,320 --> 00:27:42,639 Speaker 1: use like real old keys that they find and stamp 496 00:27:42,680 --> 00:27:45,439 Speaker 1: those words on. So it's like the gift that keeps giving, 497 00:27:46,040 --> 00:27:48,520 Speaker 1: except it's much better than the Jelly of the Month 498 00:27:48,680 --> 00:27:52,520 Speaker 1: club from Christmas Vacation. Hopefully you guys have all seen 499 00:27:52,560 --> 00:27:54,879 Speaker 1: that movie, because you have no idea what I'm talking about. 500 00:27:55,040 --> 00:27:57,359 Speaker 1: But that's the gift that keeps giving that I'd actually 501 00:27:57,400 --> 00:27:59,520 Speaker 1: want to be a part of. And that's also coming 502 00:27:59,520 --> 00:28:01,600 Speaker 1: from somebody doesn't like jelly. So maybe we should put 503 00:28:01,640 --> 00:28:03,720 Speaker 1: Jelly of the Month Club on here as an idea. 504 00:28:04,240 --> 00:28:08,520 Speaker 1: That can just be our honorary number ten. Now, The 505 00:28:08,560 --> 00:28:11,880 Speaker 1: Giving Keys actually has a really expansive collection on their website. 506 00:28:11,880 --> 00:28:14,720 Speaker 1: Now they offer a lot more items. But I am 507 00:28:14,800 --> 00:28:18,000 Speaker 1: really again to make this easier for you, guys, really 508 00:28:18,040 --> 00:28:22,879 Speaker 1: suggest going with that original item, the original pieces as 509 00:28:22,880 --> 00:28:26,080 Speaker 1: an easy way to celebrate or encourage somebody. And then 510 00:28:26,240 --> 00:28:29,760 Speaker 1: able which is another company that has I mean, they 511 00:28:29,760 --> 00:28:32,280 Speaker 1: have tons of stuff. They do leather goods, they do clothing, now, 512 00:28:32,280 --> 00:28:34,640 Speaker 1: they have some home goods, they have shoes. They also 513 00:28:34,720 --> 00:28:38,160 Speaker 1: have a jewelry line. Now, this jewelry line was actually 514 00:28:38,200 --> 00:28:41,800 Speaker 1: started a long time ago by Gracie Moekler who is 515 00:28:41,920 --> 00:28:45,400 Speaker 1: now the founder of Emergency Confetti, And if you haven't 516 00:28:45,440 --> 00:28:48,640 Speaker 1: heard of Emergency Confetti, it's definitely worth checking out and 517 00:28:48,720 --> 00:28:52,880 Speaker 1: also has a wonderful mission behind it. And able Abel's 518 00:28:52,960 --> 00:28:57,080 Speaker 1: jewelry line has jewelry that you can also personalize. And 519 00:28:57,880 --> 00:29:05,280 Speaker 1: their company helps give job opportunities to women who are 520 00:29:05,680 --> 00:29:09,960 Speaker 1: coming out of less than desirable situations, whether that's sobriety 521 00:29:10,400 --> 00:29:14,880 Speaker 1: or just dangerous living situations or incarcerations, stuff like that. 522 00:29:15,120 --> 00:29:17,920 Speaker 1: They help get women back on their feet and allow 523 00:29:17,960 --> 00:29:21,360 Speaker 1: them to do some meaningful work that can create some 524 00:29:21,680 --> 00:29:25,160 Speaker 1: self esteem, some sense of self and all that good 525 00:29:25,200 --> 00:29:28,680 Speaker 1: stuff that we really need to be successful. And so 526 00:29:28,720 --> 00:29:31,400 Speaker 1: I love the mission behind it. And like I said, 527 00:29:31,440 --> 00:29:35,560 Speaker 1: they have July that you can personalize. And last year 528 00:29:35,600 --> 00:29:39,719 Speaker 1: for Christmas, I gave the three quarts Therapy Therapists bracelets 529 00:29:39,760 --> 00:29:43,680 Speaker 1: that said both slash and on them if you know 530 00:29:43,760 --> 00:29:48,040 Speaker 1: you know again. And recently I got one of their necklaces. 531 00:29:48,400 --> 00:29:51,040 Speaker 1: It's like a long bar and it has four sides 532 00:29:51,080 --> 00:29:53,960 Speaker 1: to it, and I put on the front the person's name, 533 00:29:54,000 --> 00:29:56,440 Speaker 1: and then on each side I put a word that 534 00:29:56,480 --> 00:29:59,520 Speaker 1: describes them stamped a word that describes them on there. 535 00:29:59,680 --> 00:30:02,760 Speaker 1: And that's just a fun way to celebrate somebody and 536 00:30:02,760 --> 00:30:06,240 Speaker 1: at the same time pretty simple. So there you guys 537 00:30:06,280 --> 00:30:10,480 Speaker 1: have it. There is my short but long list of 538 00:30:10,720 --> 00:30:14,640 Speaker 1: easy gift ideas that honestly are more than just gifts. 539 00:30:15,400 --> 00:30:17,600 Speaker 1: And I feel like I've said this a million times, 540 00:30:17,680 --> 00:30:19,760 Speaker 1: but I will link all of those things so you 541 00:30:19,800 --> 00:30:23,120 Speaker 1: can find them for yourselves easily. We're in the spirit 542 00:30:23,120 --> 00:30:25,600 Speaker 1: of ease in the show notes, so you can find 543 00:30:25,640 --> 00:30:28,200 Speaker 1: that there and you can grab whatever speaks to you 544 00:30:28,240 --> 00:30:31,480 Speaker 1: if anything does. Also, feel free to gift something to 545 00:30:31,600 --> 00:30:36,240 Speaker 1: yourself because that is always okay and always encouraged by me. 546 00:30:37,120 --> 00:30:40,200 Speaker 1: So I hope that this year you get to, like 547 00:30:40,240 --> 00:30:44,520 Speaker 1: I said earlier, really enjoy this time where we get 548 00:30:44,560 --> 00:30:48,320 Speaker 1: to celebrate each other and celebrate our relationships, and we 549 00:30:48,440 --> 00:30:53,560 Speaker 1: allow energy to spend more on celebrating than making sure 550 00:30:53,760 --> 00:30:58,200 Speaker 1: we're celebrating exactly perfectly right and getting the exact perfect 551 00:30:58,280 --> 00:31:02,920 Speaker 1: impression or feedback or reaction that might get in the 552 00:31:02,960 --> 00:31:05,720 Speaker 1: way of the actual experience. If you guys want to 553 00:31:05,760 --> 00:31:08,160 Speaker 1: send me a note or a question for couch Talks, 554 00:31:08,200 --> 00:31:11,080 Speaker 1: the episode where I answer your questions, you can send 555 00:31:11,120 --> 00:31:14,320 Speaker 1: that to Katherine at you Need Therapy podcast dot com. 556 00:31:14,680 --> 00:31:16,960 Speaker 1: You can follow me Kat van Buren on Instagram and 557 00:31:17,360 --> 00:31:20,240 Speaker 1: at You Need Therapy Podcast Until I talk to you 558 00:31:20,240 --> 00:31:22,640 Speaker 1: guys again on Wednesday for couch Talks. I hope you 559 00:31:22,680 --> 00:31:23,840 Speaker 1: have the day you need to have.