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Speaker 1: Motherfucking mini your self mini episode, motherfucking mini ever self.

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Speaker 2: Some line from the Kendrick diss I didn't have time

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Speaker 2: to look up. Welcome to a man, Welcome little Mama's

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Speaker 2: and gentiles alike to another phenomenal episode of My Mama

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Speaker 2: Told Me.

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Speaker 3: The vodcast where we dive deep, deep into the pockets

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Speaker 3: of black conspiracy theories.

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Speaker 2: And we finally worked to prove the conspiracy theories of

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Speaker 2: you the listeners. It's a motherfucking mini.

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Speaker 3: Episode, motherfucking mini episode, and what a what a phenomenal rebuttal.

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Speaker 3: It took a long time, but God damned, this motherfucking

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Speaker 3: shit hurt my feelings. Brother, I've been, I've been really

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Speaker 3: ever since. Oh there's listen. There's very little that I

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Speaker 3: personally feel like, uh in common with Drake right, Like

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Speaker 3: I think that I don't think personally that's not like

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Speaker 3: a person that I want to be or or uh

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Speaker 3: sort of see myself in. But there is something, and

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Speaker 3: I think this sort of speaks to the way that

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Speaker 3: culture is. There is something in seeing someone who looks

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Speaker 3: like you be annihilated that makes you get defense.

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Speaker 2: You feel like you could catch it, you're catching astray.

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Speaker 3: It felt like it was. It was Kendrick saying fuck

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Speaker 3: Drake and Lanston, you know what I mean, Like he's

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Speaker 3: like whispering my name underneath it. It's just was. It

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Speaker 3: was hurting my feelings. And I listened to it like

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Speaker 3: five times in a row, and I was like, God damn.

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Speaker 3: He didn't even and he only slightly touched that Drake's

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Speaker 3: a pedophile.

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Speaker 2: Only grazed just the tip. He just gave a low

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Speaker 2: das and said, I'm not even gonna go that far

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Speaker 2: because I respect.

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Speaker 3: I respect that you got a nice RnB.

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Speaker 2: You know what would hurt my feelings is if you

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Speaker 2: dissed me and you're not rapping in a way that

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Speaker 2: feels like you're gonna be out of breath right like

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Speaker 2: all your motherfucking wind.

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Speaker 3: That's so relaxed, Like, oh yeah, that's a really good

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Speaker 3: way to put it. He opens with that with that

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Speaker 3: sort of like a ab ass rhyme, and it's it's

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Speaker 3: mean right from the beginning, You're like, God damn, this

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Speaker 3: nigga is gonna take his time six minutes of just

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Speaker 3: making me feel low is fucking you know.

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Speaker 2: Remind me is in eighth grade, we had this dude,

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Speaker 2: mister lyle and he was like, such a bad did

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Speaker 2: you ever have a teacher who was like a white

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Speaker 2: you could tell you's maybe more a rich guy and

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Speaker 2: like kind of a poor school. And he couldn't hang.

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Speaker 2: He was like that. Like at one point he yelled

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Speaker 2: at us and he was like, I don't know how

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Speaker 2: you can remember all the words on these rap lyrics,

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Speaker 2: but you you know what I mean. He was like

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Speaker 2: that kind of guy, you know what I mean? And Bro,

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Speaker 2: there was this one I felt bad for him. There

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Speaker 2: was this one white kid who sat in the front

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Speaker 2: and they used to bully this kid like it is

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Speaker 2: pretty terrible. But like when he was like, we don't

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Speaker 2: want to say nigga, it was like them whispering to

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Speaker 2: that kid, you know what I mean. It was just

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Speaker 2: like a mean, mean bullying.

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Speaker 3: No, he told him he dresses bad.

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Speaker 2: I hate the way that you dress.

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Speaker 3: He said, uh, you have no relationship with your son.

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Speaker 3: You don't wake him up in the morning, which just

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Speaker 3: fell so bad. But you know, Drake doesn't wake his

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Speaker 3: son up.

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Speaker 2: I don't think Drake has ever heated up an uncrustable.

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Speaker 2: I don't think he's opened up a juicy juice. I

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Speaker 2: don't think that is get down.

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Speaker 3: I think he's got those those blinds on the automatic

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Speaker 3: setting and they open up and a TV turns on,

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Speaker 3: and that little odd looking baby just sort of watches

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Speaker 3: puppy balls until an adult finally sobers up.

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Speaker 2: And ston he said, well you saying next to text

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Speaker 2: sexy rat, red juice, two bad bitches. That shit. That

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Speaker 2: shit was crazy.

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Speaker 3: It was it was mean, and I'm excited. I like

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Speaker 3: that wrap is beefing unnecessarily. It's not even like this

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Speaker 3: came from some real place. But but apparently it is

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Speaker 3: a very real place. Apparently everybody's had to Drake this

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Speaker 3: entire time.

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Speaker 2: Is that a surprise though? You know, in our industry

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Speaker 2: there are people who are famous who everybody hates. That's like,

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Speaker 2: that's why it makes sense to me. It's like I

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Speaker 2: see the parallels on I'm like, oh, I'm that makes

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Speaker 2: sense to me that Drake's like, nobody likes this dude,

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Speaker 2: but he's popping.

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Speaker 3: There are But but I'm I guess I'm more surprised

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Speaker 3: at how many of them were sort of like his

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Speaker 3: closest collaborators, you know what I mean, Like it it

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Speaker 3: doesn't surprise me that a bunch of motherfuckers don't like Drake.

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Speaker 3: I can see that easy. But it did surprise me that,

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Speaker 3: like it was a list of what I thought were

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Speaker 3: Drake's best friends, being like, man, I've hated your guts

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Speaker 3: for years.

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Speaker 2: I think it's just fuck you. That's so cool. He

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Speaker 2: does feel so bad.

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Speaker 3: Right now, he's gotta feel insanely low. And what does

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Speaker 3: he call? No, I don't, yeah, just the OLV. O

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Speaker 3: can't because for.

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Speaker 2: Are we even sure those are real people?

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Speaker 3: He shouts out people all the time that I've never

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Speaker 3: heard of and have never se what I'm saying.

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Speaker 2: Oh, Vo, who's in ovo? Who's in it?

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Speaker 3: Forty forty wheelchairs?

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Speaker 2: It's just like, and I get it, you made up

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Speaker 2: a fake gang to impress your other friends. I understand. Yeah,

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Speaker 2: it's a bummer because I get it. Though it's also like,

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Speaker 2: as a soft, sensitive guy, I also feel what I'm like, Damn,

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Speaker 2: it feels like it feels like he's coming to me too.

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Speaker 2: Mm hmmm yeah, yeah, I feel like anybody who has

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Speaker 2: any weakness anywhere in them.

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Speaker 3: Yeah, No, I think I think I think weak men

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Speaker 3: united in both our our fear and appreciation for They're like, Damn,

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Speaker 3: that's a dude, that's a centered adult. Is a grown

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Speaker 3: man talking down to a chi.

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Speaker 2: He's not writing checks based on foolery, which is pretty

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Speaker 2: much my full bank account. You ever get it checking,

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Speaker 2: you're like, damn, I talked about pussy for this.

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Speaker 3: That it's really when you when you're like, this was

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Speaker 3: a scam. I think I just scammed the system and

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Speaker 3: I ain't going to your high that's crazy, though. We

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Speaker 3: gotta get you. We got to get you back doing burpees.

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Speaker 2: Man, No, that sucks. Burpee sucks. They're like the worst bro.

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Speaker 2: They do suck, but but they're effective. I think, Yeah,

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Speaker 2: I mean that's why they do it in prison.

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Speaker 3: Right, Yeah, I've heard.

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Speaker 2: I don't. I don't know.

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Speaker 4: I'm not.

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Speaker 2: You never do burpanes though, you never read to do

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Speaker 2: it like high school?

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Speaker 3: Oh no, I do them now? Yeah?

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Speaker 2: But do you do the Kendricks where you end with

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Speaker 2: the like what you face towards lie and you end with.

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Speaker 3: The no, I'm a I'm a sinner. There's no uh,

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Speaker 3: I like that. There's no praise and worship attached to

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Speaker 3: my working out. There's just self hatred and a desperate

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Speaker 3: want to make five to ten pounds leave my body.

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Speaker 2: I mean, honestly, I think both things are as effective.

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Speaker 3: Self hatred and worship of God.

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Speaker 2: Yeah, yeah, yeah, I either way to probably get you

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Speaker 2: to where you need to be going.

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Speaker 3: I think I think we all just need a motivator,

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Speaker 3: and whatever that motivator is, it be it self hatred.

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Speaker 5: You have a family, yeah, yeah, yeah, I love that

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Speaker 5: your hatred for yourself is a higher motivator.

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Speaker 1: Yeah.

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Speaker 3: Man, I'm not going to pull back on this. Yes,

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Speaker 3: it's complicated in myself, my whole life. I just got

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Speaker 3: a family. I met them recently. Oh man, I barely

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Speaker 3: know my daughter. But but me, I know me well

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Speaker 3: and no thanks to me, I know my true Yeah,

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Speaker 3: and they are murky fucking like me. So I gotta

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Speaker 3: I gotta keep working.

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Speaker 2: Anyways, We're not just here to talk about why, like

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Speaker 2: since got those killer abs that he's got, you could

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Speaker 2: get away. I don't bro if I was not. If

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Speaker 2: you're like a ben not shut off guy, why don't

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Speaker 2: you just lie and say you have abs? You think

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Speaker 2: these fucking people know any different.

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Speaker 3: The problem is, and this is I've been thinking about

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Speaker 3: this recently. The problem is is that for casting, I

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Speaker 3: often get casted as a do with abs and that

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Speaker 3: gets complicated when the veal happens and you ain't got

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Speaker 3: what they were hoping for.

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Speaker 2: Oh that is a new kind of body shame. I

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Speaker 2: don't even understand.

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Speaker 4: Yeah.

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Speaker 1: Yo.

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Speaker 2: So they're like, you click called in as a heart

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Speaker 2: throb and they're like, okay, take it off. You got

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Speaker 2: like a lot muscle tone your body. That's all. You know.

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Speaker 3: It's crazy. It's not even bad. It's not even like,

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Speaker 3: uh what the type ship? Thanks? Man, It's just not good,

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Speaker 3: you know what I mean. And when you they cast

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Speaker 3: you as a heart throb for television, they're like, it's

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Speaker 3: gotta be good. You gotta be tight. Yeah, it's gotta yeah.

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Speaker 1: Yeah.

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Speaker 3: And then it's just like, oh, man, I got that

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Speaker 3: same body. We could have casted me for that, and yeah,

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Speaker 3: what do you want for me? I didn't I tell jokes, y'all.

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Speaker 3: Y'all are idiots. Yeah, you're the one that's not vanity.

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Speaker 2: Man. I've never been a heart throw but I think

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Speaker 2: I could do it for a season. I don't think

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Speaker 2: I could live that lifetime.

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Speaker 3: I think a lot of people will feel that way.

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Speaker 3: I think they are like, oh, I would like to

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Speaker 3: be the heart throb, And then I think you what

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Speaker 3: you want is for it to be temporary. I don't

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Speaker 3: think you want it to be a permanent issue. I

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Speaker 3: think no, no, no, no. Look at Michael B. Jordan,

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Speaker 3: You know what I mean?

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Speaker 2: I think I think bro. People always call me a hater.

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Speaker 2: I've maintained I think he's a terrible actor. I don't

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Speaker 2: think he's a terrible actor. I don't think he's a

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Speaker 2: great one. Okay, that's not fair. I don't think he's

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Speaker 2: a great I think there are very few movie stars

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Speaker 2: who are as poor of an actor as he is.

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Speaker 3: I think that's fair.

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Speaker 2: Does that make sense? There's just no personality on anything

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Speaker 2: he does, Like Will smith Man, regardless of where he

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Speaker 2: is right now, straight on, such a charismatic person you

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Speaker 2: know what I mean? So many of these movies starres

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Speaker 2: so charismatic. Michael B. Jordan is just like, he's just

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Speaker 2: so boring to me. Throw me in the ways with

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Speaker 2: my ancestors.

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Speaker 3: Yeah. And I think he found himself in a very

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Speaker 3: unfortunate position where so much of his casting booking value

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Speaker 3: was connected to him having that sexy ass body, and

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Speaker 3: then it became like, okay, well I have to just

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Speaker 3: be more sexy body than even talented individual, you know

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Speaker 3: what I mean, Like we are, we are wanting to

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Speaker 3: see the abs more than we're even expecting you to

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Speaker 3: have range. And now he can't move his shoulders all

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Speaker 3: the way. So even if he wanted to play, you know,

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Speaker 3: a different kind of role, it just is a buff

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Speaker 3: ass dude pretending it's not a fucking you know what

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Speaker 3: I mean?

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Speaker 2: And I say this knowing fully well that I would

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Speaker 2: have been the person. Remember when that lady interviewed him

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Speaker 2: and he like made fun of her for calling him

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Speaker 2: corny that you want to talk about? That was my

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Speaker 2: I was happy for him, I but I was like, man,

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Speaker 2: that's gonna there's that I was not cool too.

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Speaker 3: I'm sure, oh, you felt like you were the lady

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Speaker 3: more than you felt like you were him.

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Speaker 2: Way more. I'm not that rich, oh, me and the

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Speaker 2: ladies bank accounts are closer than me, you know what

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Speaker 2: I'm saying, Like I do all right, but I'm not.

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Speaker 2: I don't own anything.

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Speaker 3: I guess I wasn't thinking about it in terms of wealth.

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Speaker 3: I was just more like emotionally, I remember people who

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Speaker 3: you know, we were not nice, and it was like

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Speaker 3: a great hero moment for him to be like hey,

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Speaker 3: I remember, but it's okay, It's okay.

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Speaker 2: But also, let's be honest, he was corny in high school.

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Speaker 2: Of course I'm going to be an actor. Of course

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Speaker 2: the fuck of course I would have made fun of

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Speaker 2: him too. I'm not the hero in this.

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Speaker 3: Story, but I definitely we all have enemies, do you

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Speaker 3: know what I mean? And it was nice to see

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Speaker 3: somebody come out fucking yeah, get to confront their enemy

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Speaker 3: and be classy. It was.

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Speaker 2: It was cool. It's cool, but the bad part of

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Speaker 2: me always I only want to see bullies physically bested.

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Speaker 2: I'm not saying he should have hit that woman, but

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Speaker 2: I'm saying that, like, had he got his girlfriend to

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Speaker 2: do it, I would think that was cool.

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Speaker 3: Yeah, it would have been cool if you went, hey,

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Speaker 3: lady bodyguard.

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Speaker 2: Yeah yeah, yeah, she dropped that bitch.

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Speaker 3: Because a lady in a three piece black suit just

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Speaker 3: comes and karate chops the ship out of this lady

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Speaker 3: from his high school.

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Speaker 2: I wish I could tell you how many times in

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Speaker 2: my life I wish I had lady hitters to go

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Speaker 2: they whenever I've needed them. I've never had one, but

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Speaker 2: because I got bully more by girls. Oh yeah, so

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Speaker 2: I remember just being like sister. It was not even

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Speaker 2: bullying in the same It was just like, Yo, this

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Speaker 2: girl's I'm my fucking bumper all the time, you.

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Speaker 3: Know, right, I just need somebody that's gonna make them shaky,

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Speaker 3: share a little more shaky in their behavior.

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Speaker 2: But not on my bumper in the way where it's

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Speaker 2: like maybe I could convert it into getting right.

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Speaker 3: This isn't flirting. This is just antagonizing.

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Speaker 2: Yeah, yeah, yeah, So that's all the girls who wore dickies.

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Speaker 2: Fuck remember dickies girls. That's like such a specific genre.

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Speaker 3: We can't talk about this all day. We got an email.

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Speaker 2: Olivia said, pitch, this could be the video episode Fighting

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Speaker 2: Girls combination. Remember, yeah, man, And this is the end

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Speaker 2: of it. When he started speaking in that Canadian accent,

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Speaker 2: that's that's tough, man, and that's we all think you

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Speaker 2: guys talk funny up there.

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Speaker 3: There's so much footage of him being a little d weep,

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Speaker 3: and they're they're just gonna keep Metro is gonna like

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Speaker 3: mixing just bad the grassy clip to bad the grassy

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Speaker 3: clip into everybody's shit. It's gonna go on forever. And

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Speaker 3: he I just don't know if Drake has a stamina.

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Speaker 3: I will say this to his credit before we and

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Speaker 3: we'll move on from this in a second. To his credit,

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Speaker 3: he has shown more fight than I thought he could

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Speaker 3: given the circumstances against him.

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Speaker 2: I mean, to be to be a rapper, you have

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Speaker 2: to be able to take a punch. And I do

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Speaker 2: think even the bad rappers like you gotta because it's

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Speaker 2: just such a that's just how that shit is, you

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Speaker 2: know what I mean?

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Speaker 3: And I do think, like him or not, Drake is

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Speaker 3: a great rapper, Like I do think he legitimately like

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Speaker 3: he's funny and he kind of like is able to

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Speaker 3: kind of like do bits, you know, even.

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Speaker 2: Yeah, when really the only thing is I agree with Kendrick.

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Speaker 2: The only thing I don't like is the tough talking ship. Really,

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Speaker 2: I was just like, but everything else he does I fun. Man.

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Speaker 3: Yeah, he's a fun guy, and so it's always got a.

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Speaker 2: Great summer song, always got a great summer song.

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Speaker 3: Dude, Passion Fruit is better than everybody who's ever dissed him,

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Speaker 3: you know what I mean? Like that song enough is

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Speaker 3: better than anything anybody else has made.

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Speaker 2: Drake gets me on ship that's not even for me,

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Speaker 2: you know how much I like nice for what, like

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Speaker 2: for real, Like, I love that song. It's a great song.

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Speaker 2: It's so good. That has nothing to do with me.

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Speaker 3: No, no, in fact, in fact that you're You're part

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Speaker 3: of the problem in the song.

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Speaker 2: I'm the one who wants to him. I'm the one

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Speaker 2: who's like you.

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Speaker 3: He was talking to them, dicky girls when uh, when

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Speaker 3: you don't. We're calling upon you because we have new merch.

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Speaker 3: We have very exciting merch that we are now selling

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Speaker 3: and it's fucking great. We love it so much.

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Speaker 2: Just sleek, it's sexy.

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Speaker 3: Come on, you want to tell them what we have?

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Speaker 2: Yeah, we have three different types of hats, which is

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Speaker 2: really fun. We have a two tone hat, an alien

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Speaker 2: dad hat, the traditional logo in black and khaki. Then

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Speaker 2: we have the enamel pin with an alien who has

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Speaker 2: a cooofie on it since my mama told me. And

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Speaker 2: then we have t shirts that say proud little Mama,

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Speaker 2: which is who you are.

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Speaker 3: Yeah, you can buy the merch now, go to my

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Speaker 3: mama told me dot merch table dot com. It's a

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Speaker 3: brand new name, but it's the same old merch and

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Speaker 3: we would love for you to get some if you

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Speaker 3: haven't got it already. And we want you to have

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Speaker 3: all the sweet stuff, so get it.

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Speaker 4: All right.

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Speaker 3: We got an email twenty minutes. Then we got an

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Speaker 3: email twenty minutes. Then we got an email from a

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Speaker 3: person named Shelley. Shelley sent us an email and she said, Hi,

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Speaker 3: David and Langston. I was recently introduced to your podcast

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Speaker 3: via the socials. I loved the podcast, like legit, fuck

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Speaker 3: with y'all. Thank you. I'm working my way through the episodes,

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Speaker 3: and I'm not sure if you guys have already covered this,

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Speaker 3: so my bad if you did. I'm born and raised

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Speaker 3: in Baltimore, Maryland, and growing up there there was an

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Speaker 3: urban legend going around the city about the bunny Man.

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Speaker 3: It was a man dressed in a bunny suit going

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Speaker 3: around attacking people with a big ass knife. Had the

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Speaker 3: kids in my neighborhood shook. I'm not sure if it

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Speaker 3: was just a black neighborhood thing, but people who I

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Speaker 3: met at college HBCU from this region also knew about

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Speaker 3: the bunny Man. Was that a thing in your neighborhoods

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Speaker 3: growing up? Thanks for sharing your craft best, Shelley, not

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Speaker 3: at all. Never heard of the bunny man for in

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Speaker 3: my life.

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Speaker 2: I mean, I yeah, it's really interesting. I don't know

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Speaker 2: if it's a timing thing, because that seems to be

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Speaker 2: like a more of a seventies eighties thing than a

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Speaker 2: nineties thing, like this idea of like some mass predator,

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Speaker 2: you know what I mean, or even like like even

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Speaker 2: growing up, I didn't hear about it, like even in

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Speaker 2: the media, like there was no there weren't a lot

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Speaker 2: of serial killers or anything like that. Does that make

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Speaker 2: you know what I mean?

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Speaker 3: Yeah, I mean, certainly the serial killer part of it,

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Speaker 3: I will say, And we've talked about it a few

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Speaker 3: times on the podcast Homie. The clown was a very

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Speaker 3: real thing for Chicago kids, and that, certainly in the

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00:20:41,000 --> 00:20:45,840
Speaker 3: nineties was still a thing we believed and we're telling

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Speaker 3: people about and all that shit of like this murderous

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Speaker 3: man and a clown and a white or a clown

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Speaker 3: costume and a white van snatching up babies. But I

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Speaker 3: do take your point that it was more it's certain

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Speaker 3: felt more like an active threat probably in the seventies

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Speaker 3: and eighties when serial killers were at their height. Well,

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Speaker 3: we ain't got serial killers no more.

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Speaker 2: I don't know because we I mean, DC was the

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Speaker 2: last one that I remember that it was like we

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Speaker 2: as a nation were like you know what I mean, Yeah,

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Speaker 2: I think we got school shootings now though that's.

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Speaker 3: True and that's almost serial killing, but like faster.

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Speaker 2: Which do you ever were you? I don't know how

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Speaker 2: to word this correctly.

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Speaker 3: I'm excited either way.

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Speaker 2: I was talking to my girl the other day and

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Speaker 2: I remember I was telling her about how one time,

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Speaker 2: so I, yeah, I told you, I went to a

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Speaker 2: sh a bunch of schools. One of the schools I

380
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Speaker 2: went to one of the junior high schools. It was

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Speaker 2: at the bottom of a hill and a high school

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Speaker 2: was at the top of the hill, like the adjoining

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Speaker 2: high school or whatever. And they had shot somebody at

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Speaker 2: the high school. But it wasn't like it wasn't like Colin.

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Speaker 2: It was just like one guy shot like two guys. Yeah,

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Speaker 2: and we locked down and all that, Like we couldn't

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Speaker 2: go home for like an hour after school shit. But

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Speaker 2: that shit wasn't even on the news. Yeah, but that's poverty, right, yes,

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Speaker 2: not the but it like we because Colmback was a

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Speaker 2: very nice school. People don't realize that. It's like it's

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Speaker 2: like a sports powerhouse. It's a very nice school.

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Speaker 3: I went to school down the street from not down

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Speaker 3: the street, but our neighborhood, Oak Park is adjacent to

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Speaker 3: a neighborhood called Maywood, and they're not right next to each other,

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Speaker 3: but they're pretty close to each other. And Maywood is

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Speaker 3: a predominantly black neighborhood. A lot less money, a lot

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Speaker 3: obviously less funding for the school. There were shootings all

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Speaker 3: the time. It PROVIDESO East the high school that was

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Speaker 3: in Maywood, and that shit was never it's like a

400
00:23:00,600 --> 00:23:04,040
Speaker 3: real problem. It was just treated like gang violence and

401
00:23:04,160 --> 00:23:07,600
Speaker 3: sort of retaliation whatever they were calling it, instead of

402
00:23:07,720 --> 00:23:12,480
Speaker 3: recognizing that, like, yo, there's something fundamentally broken in our system,

403
00:23:12,640 --> 00:23:16,400
Speaker 3: whether you even if you do associated with gangs. Why

404
00:23:16,440 --> 00:23:19,560
Speaker 3: are we not assessing the the greater sort of like

405
00:23:19,680 --> 00:23:22,240
Speaker 3: problem in the fact that this all exists for these

406
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Speaker 3: students who have to go to school every single day.

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Speaker 2: That's fair because also now that I'm thinking about it,

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00:23:27,920 --> 00:23:30,000
Speaker 2: we only had to stay after like an.

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Speaker 3: Hour, just long enough.

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Speaker 2: It was like they had like come on the in

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Speaker 2: they had come on the intercom like a little bit

412
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Speaker 2: before last period, and then they let us go to

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Speaker 2: the buses like yeah, like an hour yeah, probably like

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Speaker 2: an hour later, yeah, no, which I was pissed. I

415
00:23:50,320 --> 00:23:54,159
Speaker 2: remember because that's when Dragon ball Z was on Cartoon Network.

416
00:23:55,520 --> 00:23:58,560
Speaker 2: Remember that, Yeah, yeah, that was that was during that

417
00:23:58,600 --> 00:24:01,000
Speaker 2: and I was like, but I I also wasn't telling

418
00:24:01,000 --> 00:24:03,280
Speaker 2: anybody I was watching it, So it's doing inside.

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Speaker 3: It is a crazy thing that we used to have

420
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Speaker 3: to be like anime heads in secret, relaxed.

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Speaker 2: I watched one show, not a fucking nerd.

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Speaker 3: Oh well, I was a fucking nerd, and I couldn't

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Speaker 3: tell nobody nothing.

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Speaker 2: No, it was not cool. Nobody wanted to but dragon

425
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Speaker 2: ball Z it was not like nobody couldn't be Like

426
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Speaker 2: Goku's been making the spirit bomb for days.

427
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Speaker 3: I listen. I've never been a very big fan of

428
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Speaker 3: any of my step parents, and I've had more than most.

429
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Speaker 2: Sometimes you give a peek behind the curtain and it's chilling.

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Speaker 3: Listen. My dad's been married three, my mom's been married

431
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Speaker 3: for There's a whole lot of these motherfuckers.

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Speaker 2: That is a lot. Look at you that you're killing.

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Speaker 3: I never liked none of them enough. But but I

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00:24:56,040 --> 00:24:59,679
Speaker 3: will say my mom's second husband used to have like

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Speaker 3: a bunch of the tapes that he, I guess, had

436
00:25:03,320 --> 00:25:07,240
Speaker 3: either recorded or bought on some weird website whatever. But

437
00:25:07,359 --> 00:25:10,639
Speaker 3: he had tape dragon Ball Z tapes that I would

438
00:25:10,680 --> 00:25:13,920
Speaker 3: like watch, and they had like the whole Freezer arc

439
00:25:14,480 --> 00:25:19,800
Speaker 3: all the shit. Man. I used to go crazy watching

440
00:25:19,800 --> 00:25:23,760
Speaker 3: that shit. And then once Cartoon Network finally got to Nami, it.

441
00:25:23,640 --> 00:25:25,560
Speaker 2: Was so you were before that.

442
00:25:25,720 --> 00:25:29,399
Speaker 3: Even I've been on anime since I was a boy

443
00:25:29,640 --> 00:25:33,080
Speaker 3: boy wow, I mean, not a prete. I was a

444
00:25:33,280 --> 00:25:36,920
Speaker 3: boy being like, this is the future of me.

445
00:25:37,560 --> 00:25:40,359
Speaker 2: That's so because I got lucky. I had a friend

446
00:25:40,520 --> 00:25:44,360
Speaker 2: in elementary school and he told me about dragon Ball

447
00:25:44,359 --> 00:25:47,080
Speaker 2: because dragon Ball used to come on a wz WB

448
00:25:47,800 --> 00:25:50,720
Speaker 2: the first dragon Ball like when he was when Goku

449
00:25:50,800 --> 00:25:53,280
Speaker 2: was a little boy, and I used to watch that.

450
00:25:53,480 --> 00:25:57,120
Speaker 2: And then I just happened to fall in to dragon

451
00:25:57,160 --> 00:25:59,000
Speaker 2: Ball Z because I was like, oh, I like that,

452
00:25:59,440 --> 00:26:01,800
Speaker 2: but like it didn't go and I had seen Ninja

453
00:26:01,840 --> 00:26:05,639
Speaker 2: scrolling didn't like it because I was just like, I

454
00:26:05,640 --> 00:26:08,760
Speaker 2: don't want to put a sword in some of these pussy.

455
00:26:09,880 --> 00:26:11,040
Speaker 2: I don't think that's cool.

456
00:26:15,920 --> 00:26:21,320
Speaker 3: I'm not sure. I'm not sure how the bunny Man

457
00:26:21,359 --> 00:26:25,640
Speaker 3: got us here, and frankly, I'm not sure that matters.

458
00:26:25,720 --> 00:26:27,880
Speaker 3: I will say that Olivia sent us a little bit

459
00:26:27,920 --> 00:26:30,880
Speaker 3: of information. She said The bunny Man is an urban

460
00:26:30,960 --> 00:26:34,760
Speaker 3: legend that originated from two incidents in Fairfax County, Virginia.

461
00:26:35,119 --> 00:26:38,480
Speaker 3: So that makes sense. Baltimore, Maryland. You know DMB all

462
00:26:38,560 --> 00:26:41,000
Speaker 3: sort of connected in nineteen seventy.

463
00:26:41,080 --> 00:26:41,560
Speaker 2: You were right.

464
00:26:41,680 --> 00:26:45,000
Speaker 3: This is a seventies born sort of conspiracy, but has

465
00:26:45,000 --> 00:26:47,920
Speaker 3: been spread throughout the Washington, DC, and Maryland areas. The

466
00:26:48,000 --> 00:26:51,960
Speaker 3: legend has many variations, most involved a man wearing a

467
00:26:52,040 --> 00:26:55,480
Speaker 3: rabbit costume who attacks people with an axe or hatchet.

468
00:26:55,840 --> 00:27:00,960
Speaker 3: So big ass knife. That's just little babies translating. Most

469
00:27:01,000 --> 00:27:05,320
Speaker 3: of the stories occur around Colchester Overpass, a Southern Railway

470
00:27:05,400 --> 00:27:10,040
Speaker 3: overpass manning Colchester Road near Clifton, Virginia, sometimes referred to

471
00:27:10,080 --> 00:27:13,080
Speaker 3: as bunny Man Bridge. This motherfucker got his own bridge.

472
00:27:13,280 --> 00:27:19,560
Speaker 3: That makes me feel like that really happened at least once. Yeah, Yeah,

473
00:27:20,119 --> 00:27:23,919
Speaker 3: that's there. Really was a bunny Man. He just wasn't

474
00:27:24,040 --> 00:27:29,560
Speaker 3: like still out on the loose, right. It is the

475
00:27:30,080 --> 00:27:33,119
Speaker 3: scary thing, And if we can sort of connect the

476
00:27:33,200 --> 00:27:37,280
Speaker 3: bigger sort of conversation inside of all of this, it

477
00:27:37,359 --> 00:27:41,440
Speaker 3: is sort of the scary thing. Of what urban legend

478
00:27:41,760 --> 00:27:45,119
Speaker 3: is is that it often is born from at least

479
00:27:45,119 --> 00:27:49,760
Speaker 3: some version of a real incident, and so your fears,

480
00:27:49,800 --> 00:27:52,720
Speaker 3: your parents' fears, all these people who warn you about

481
00:27:52,760 --> 00:27:55,880
Speaker 3: the horrible things that might happen to you, obviously are

482
00:27:55,920 --> 00:28:01,080
Speaker 3: sometimes being hyperbolic or extreme in their response. But it's

483
00:28:01,119 --> 00:28:05,160
Speaker 3: not because it's impossible. It's just that, like, it's unlikely

484
00:28:06,240 --> 00:28:09,920
Speaker 3: ninety nine percent of the time, right I most of

485
00:28:10,000 --> 00:28:12,560
Speaker 3: us are not gonna encounter the bunny Man, but somebody

486
00:28:12,760 --> 00:28:14,600
Speaker 3: will and that's fucking crazy.

487
00:28:14,720 --> 00:28:16,919
Speaker 2: And that's all it takes for it to spread. I

488
00:28:16,960 --> 00:28:21,119
Speaker 2: feel like, in extreme cases of anything, it's just like

489
00:28:21,359 --> 00:28:22,920
Speaker 2: it only needs to happen once, you.

490
00:28:22,840 --> 00:28:26,040
Speaker 3: Know, Yeah, you just need one bunny man and now

491
00:28:26,080 --> 00:28:29,399
Speaker 3: he can become sort of like this permanent fixture in

492
00:28:29,440 --> 00:28:30,760
Speaker 3: our minds forever.

493
00:28:30,640 --> 00:28:34,720
Speaker 2: And it'll always It's it's almost kind of beautiful, isn't

494
00:28:34,840 --> 00:28:38,800
Speaker 2: the word. But it's like such an interesting thing about humanity.

495
00:28:38,880 --> 00:28:41,680
Speaker 2: How like Lord could like that could just live regionally,

496
00:28:42,360 --> 00:28:44,800
Speaker 2: you know what I'm saying. He stabs some drunk guy

497
00:28:45,720 --> 00:28:50,160
Speaker 2: left sears after taking pictures all day, stabs some guy

498
00:28:50,200 --> 00:28:53,600
Speaker 2: on a bridge, and then we still are talking about

499
00:28:53,640 --> 00:28:55,480
Speaker 2: it forty years later, fifty years.

500
00:28:55,240 --> 00:28:58,960
Speaker 3: In a crazy way, it's it's kind of the only

501
00:28:59,000 --> 00:29:00,680
Speaker 3: way you really live forever.

502
00:29:02,840 --> 00:29:05,240
Speaker 2: I feel like this is an origin story right now.

503
00:29:06,120 --> 00:29:06,880
Speaker 1: You said.

504
00:29:11,120 --> 00:29:12,840
Speaker 3: I think I found my purpose.

505
00:29:13,960 --> 00:29:15,800
Speaker 2: You just look off into the distance.

506
00:29:22,200 --> 00:29:25,200
Speaker 6: But you know what I'm saying is I do we

507
00:29:25,320 --> 00:29:28,320
Speaker 6: spend you and I We've spent our entire lives sort

508
00:29:28,360 --> 00:29:31,560
Speaker 6: of like wanting to create legacy through being silly billies

509
00:29:31,640 --> 00:29:33,960
Speaker 6: and telling our jokes and shit.

510
00:29:34,280 --> 00:29:37,880
Speaker 3: And the unfortunate reality is that these jokes are temporary,

511
00:29:37,960 --> 00:29:42,560
Speaker 3: and that like whatever permanence we have is eventually going

512
00:29:42,640 --> 00:29:47,400
Speaker 3: to fade. We can't all remain forever, despite our skill

513
00:29:47,560 --> 00:29:51,080
Speaker 3: or hope whatever, our skill being a lot more timely

514
00:29:51,120 --> 00:29:55,680
Speaker 3: than murder exactly. But like the murder sort of has

515
00:29:55,720 --> 00:29:58,880
Speaker 3: like an evergreen quality to it, especially if you do

516
00:29:58,920 --> 00:30:01,840
Speaker 3: it in a in a crazy enough way.

517
00:30:01,920 --> 00:30:06,960
Speaker 2: You're once again venturing back in the order. I'm just saying,

518
00:30:07,000 --> 00:30:07,880
Speaker 2: you're speaking about it.

519
00:30:10,280 --> 00:30:16,800
Speaker 3: Look, dog, I'm just saying, Jeffrey Dahmer is gonna last

520
00:30:16,840 --> 00:30:19,400
Speaker 3: way longer than Ralph Barbosa, Do you know what I mean?

521
00:30:19,520 --> 00:30:28,680
Speaker 3: Like I'm saying, the imprint is far more vast.

522
00:30:33,920 --> 00:30:37,880
Speaker 2: That's my boy, That's that's true. That's true. We will

523
00:30:38,160 --> 00:30:43,320
Speaker 2: It doesn't matter how good your drake. This joke was

524
00:30:43,520 --> 00:30:46,600
Speaker 2: nobody will remember in probably ten years now.

525
00:30:47,240 --> 00:30:50,840
Speaker 3: But the fuck if you if you fucking chop up

526
00:30:50,880 --> 00:30:53,160
Speaker 3: a kid and put him in your freezer, eat him up,

527
00:30:53,880 --> 00:30:57,120
Speaker 3: eat him up, eat him up, Everybody's gonna be like, hey,

528
00:30:57,680 --> 00:30:59,680
Speaker 3: you know, people be chopping out kids and putting them

529
00:30:59,680 --> 00:31:02,720
Speaker 3: in freeze, just like just like length's doing.

530
00:31:07,360 --> 00:31:08,320
Speaker 2: Well. I think we did it.

531
00:31:08,840 --> 00:31:12,640
Speaker 3: I think we did it. I think I think if

532
00:31:12,680 --> 00:31:16,120
Speaker 3: we could wrap put a little bow on this bad boy, Shelley.

533
00:31:16,200 --> 00:31:19,840
Speaker 3: It sounds like the bunny Man, while probably not an

534
00:31:19,880 --> 00:31:24,720
Speaker 3: active threat, you can rest easy, uh, is not completely fabricated.

535
00:31:24,760 --> 00:31:27,760
Speaker 3: It probably is rooted in some real experience that somebody

536
00:31:27,800 --> 00:31:31,600
Speaker 3: had on a really fucked up overpass in Virginia, and

537
00:31:32,120 --> 00:31:35,440
Speaker 3: my best suggestion would be to stay away from said

538
00:31:35,520 --> 00:31:40,160
Speaker 3: overpass and overpasses in general. Maybe just concentrate on getting

539
00:31:40,200 --> 00:31:42,840
Speaker 3: your ass home and connecting with the people who care

540
00:31:42,880 --> 00:31:45,160
Speaker 3: about you so that the bunny Man or a bunny

541
00:31:45,200 --> 00:31:48,880
Speaker 3: man like figure does not find you in the future.

542
00:31:49,800 --> 00:31:51,400
Speaker 3: You want to tell the people where they can find

543
00:31:51,400 --> 00:31:52,640
Speaker 3: you and what cool shit you got?

544
00:31:52,720 --> 00:31:56,959
Speaker 2: Oh yeah, who got jokes eighty seven on Instagram. I

545
00:31:57,000 --> 00:32:02,000
Speaker 2: am shooting my own special uh funded producing it myself

546
00:32:02,400 --> 00:32:05,240
Speaker 2: is Kyle Birth of a Nation spelled with the G.

547
00:32:06,000 --> 00:32:07,680
Speaker 2: There will be some graphics.

548
00:32:12,560 --> 00:32:14,080
Speaker 3: That's funny. That's very funny.

549
00:32:14,360 --> 00:32:17,600
Speaker 2: There will be some graphics forthcoming. But I'm shooting it

550
00:32:17,640 --> 00:32:20,640
Speaker 2: in Denver, May eighteenth. I would love for you to

551
00:32:20,640 --> 00:32:23,320
Speaker 2: come out and get tickets. If not, it's gonna come

552
00:32:23,360 --> 00:32:26,400
Speaker 2: out about a month later. Sign up for my Patreon

553
00:32:26,520 --> 00:32:31,080
Speaker 2: Patreon dot com backslash David Bori. All the content is free.

554
00:32:31,600 --> 00:32:36,360
Speaker 2: I've given you just little tour stories videos. I gotta

555
00:32:36,440 --> 00:32:39,080
Speaker 2: I do front facing Fridays. It's the old thing. The

556
00:32:39,120 --> 00:32:41,640
Speaker 2: only thing I will ever charge you for is the

557
00:32:41,680 --> 00:32:44,440
Speaker 2: ten dollars for that special. But go online and if

558
00:32:44,440 --> 00:32:46,640
Speaker 2: you're in Denver, buy tickets. I would love to see

559
00:32:46,840 --> 00:32:50,040
Speaker 2: as many little mamas there as possible, so that once again.

560
00:32:50,160 --> 00:32:54,320
Speaker 2: Patreon dot com backslash David Bori and Cool Guy Jokes

561
00:32:54,320 --> 00:32:55,760
Speaker 2: eighty seven on Instagram.

562
00:32:55,840 --> 00:32:57,960
Speaker 3: Okay, go see the special.

563
00:32:58,080 --> 00:33:02,840
Speaker 4: Come go fucking go do that. We're almost streat Yeah,

564
00:33:02,840 --> 00:33:05,560
Speaker 4: that's fucking beautiful. I'm excited to see it all come

565
00:33:05,600 --> 00:33:08,479
Speaker 4: together and uh, as always, you can follow me at

566
00:33:08,520 --> 00:33:12,920
Speaker 4: Langston Kerman on on all social media platforms.

567
00:33:12,960 --> 00:33:16,640
Speaker 3: I am. I'm available wherever you want to find me.

568
00:33:17,040 --> 00:33:19,440
Speaker 3: Oh and if you if you are in the Los

569
00:33:19,480 --> 00:33:23,360
Speaker 3: Angeles area this weekend, we are almost sold out at

570
00:33:23,360 --> 00:33:27,520
Speaker 3: the Comedy Store May fifth, David's Birthday, seven pm sharp.

571
00:33:28,160 --> 00:33:31,040
Speaker 3: We got to start on fucking time with really.

572
00:33:31,040 --> 00:33:32,960
Speaker 2: Do because they're fucking us.

573
00:33:33,200 --> 00:33:37,040
Speaker 3: We cannot afford to waste a minute, so we are

574
00:33:37,080 --> 00:33:40,200
Speaker 3: starting at seven pm sharp. We're excited for you all

575
00:33:40,240 --> 00:33:41,960
Speaker 3: to come out as part of the Netflix It's a

576
00:33:42,000 --> 00:33:45,440
Speaker 3: Joke comedy festival. And again the tickets are almost sold out,

577
00:33:45,480 --> 00:33:46,840
Speaker 3: but we would love for you to be there, So

578
00:33:46,920 --> 00:33:49,840
Speaker 3: come on out, come do the thing. And if you

579
00:33:49,880 --> 00:33:52,880
Speaker 3: want to send us your own drops, your own conspiracy theories,

580
00:33:52,920 --> 00:33:56,520
Speaker 3: if you want to tell us that the individuals you

581
00:33:56,640 --> 00:33:59,000
Speaker 3: know to have been personally attacked by the bunny Man,

582
00:33:59,040 --> 00:34:01,880
Speaker 3: send it all to my a pod at gmail dot com.

583
00:34:02,040 --> 00:34:04,400
Speaker 3: We would love to hear from you. By the merch.

584
00:34:04,800 --> 00:34:08,759
Speaker 3: We we hope that the merch is moving and continues

585
00:34:08,840 --> 00:34:11,279
Speaker 3: to be Uh. We want to see it live, show

586
00:34:11,400 --> 00:34:13,560
Speaker 3: up with fucking hats.

587
00:34:12,760 --> 00:34:14,560
Speaker 2: We'll sign your titties.

588
00:34:15,160 --> 00:34:17,680
Speaker 3: Yeah, we'll sign. We'll sign the merchant. Hey, we'll sign

589
00:34:17,760 --> 00:34:18,880
Speaker 3: what's underneath the merchant.

590
00:34:20,040 --> 00:34:21,480
Speaker 2: Have you ever signed a titty before?

591
00:34:21,920 --> 00:34:24,600
Speaker 3: I have two titties so far in my career.

592
00:34:24,680 --> 00:34:26,799
Speaker 2: You know, I want to know one of my proudest stats,

593
00:34:27,160 --> 00:34:30,080
Speaker 2: I signed the titty before I ever did stand up comedy.

594
00:34:30,560 --> 00:34:31,279
Speaker 3: Holy ship.

595
00:34:31,360 --> 00:34:34,319
Speaker 2: Yeah, the house party is I was really going for

596
00:34:34,400 --> 00:34:37,160
Speaker 2: it for a while. Whoa, Yeah, it's amazing.

597
00:34:37,680 --> 00:34:41,720
Speaker 3: It's amazing that you you didn't peak right there, someone

598
00:34:41,760 --> 00:34:44,359
Speaker 3: said I did. Fuck Yeah, that was pretty cool.

599
00:34:44,560 --> 00:34:47,279
Speaker 2: And she kept it on all the whole like I

600
00:34:47,320 --> 00:34:48,680
Speaker 2: don't know. I guess she wouldn't have watched off for

601
00:34:48,719 --> 00:34:49,840
Speaker 2: titty at the party, but it was.

602
00:34:49,880 --> 00:34:50,080
Speaker 1: Yeah.

603
00:34:50,080 --> 00:34:51,880
Speaker 3: I was about to say, that's that part is not

604
00:34:51,920 --> 00:34:53,080
Speaker 3: as surprising.

605
00:34:53,239 --> 00:34:56,000
Speaker 2: That's the problem with those disposable cameras though you can't

606
00:34:56,000 --> 00:34:57,680
Speaker 2: even find the pictures.

607
00:34:57,960 --> 00:34:59,840
Speaker 3: Ah fuck right.

608
00:35:00,040 --> 00:35:02,960
Speaker 2: Olivia is right. Also, we're gonna sell merch there.

609
00:35:03,280 --> 00:35:06,000
Speaker 3: Yeah, merch merch at the live show. So if you

610
00:35:06,120 --> 00:35:07,680
Speaker 3: do not show up with a hat or a T

611
00:35:07,800 --> 00:35:10,359
Speaker 3: shirt or a pen, we can fix that. We can

612
00:35:10,400 --> 00:35:11,680
Speaker 3: solve that problem right there.

613
00:35:11,760 --> 00:35:16,000
Speaker 2: And it's always cash is king, you know what I'm saying. Yeah,

614
00:35:16,480 --> 00:35:19,880
Speaker 2: you bring cash, Maybe we don't have to cut everybody here,

615
00:35:19,920 --> 00:35:22,399
Speaker 2: and we give Olivia a little taste, let her weather beak.

616
00:35:22,600 --> 00:35:28,320
Speaker 3: I mean, maybe Will Ferrell doesn't have to see any

617
00:35:28,600 --> 00:35:29,400
Speaker 3: any kickback.

618
00:35:29,600 --> 00:35:31,880
Speaker 2: He's doing great. You've all seen.

619
00:35:33,280 --> 00:35:42,280
Speaker 3: He's fine. And and most importantly, if like, subscribe, rate, review,

620
00:35:42,440 --> 00:35:45,240
Speaker 3: do whatever you're supposed to do to make this podcast thrive,

621
00:35:45,800 --> 00:35:49,200
Speaker 3: that certainly is everything we needed to say. Bye, bitch,

622
00:35:50,560 --> 00:35:51,000
Speaker 3: Oh my.

623
00:35:51,080 --> 00:35:54,560
Speaker 2: Gosh, get the cat out of here.

624
00:35:55,480 --> 00:36:03,640
Speaker 1: Oh absolutely not cat, you got to go. Motherfucking mini

625
00:36:03,680 --> 00:36:13,440
Speaker 1: ever sew Mini episode Moll the fucking Mini ever sew Well,

626
00:36:13,480 --> 00:36:19,680
Speaker 1: the fucking mini episode, Mini episode All the fucking Mini

627
00:36:19,719 --> 00:36:20,040
Speaker 1: ever s