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Speaker 1: Mike check one two one two. We are back.

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Speaker 2: We are back, everybody, man, it feels like a long

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Speaker 2: time since we did an IRL takeaway.

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Speaker 1: I'm so happy to be here.

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Speaker 2: I am so happy to be back, and I apologize

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Speaker 2: for the little gap in the programming, but we are here,

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Speaker 2: and we are back, and we have launched our new

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Speaker 2: season with our first episode, which was with special guest

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Speaker 2: Gerrod Carmichael, who I enjoyed very much on the show.

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Speaker 2: And yeah, and so we're here, and this is the

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Speaker 2: takeaway of that episode, which hopefully you guys have watched already.

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Speaker 2: If you haven't, please go do that and then come

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Speaker 2: back here so we could discuss it, or you could

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Speaker 2: stay here rock with us for the takeaway and then

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Speaker 2: go watch the episode either way as you like. But

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Speaker 2: I've loved the response so far. And I loved our

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Speaker 2: conversation number one because it was different than any conversation

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Speaker 2: that we've had on IRL. Driver was our first comedian,

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Speaker 2: first comedian, first comedian who came out of the closet

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Speaker 2: on television, YEP, and has been really open. It's really

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Speaker 2: been our first episode about sexuality and have to kind

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Speaker 2: of confront it, you know, he talks about being in

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Speaker 2: the closet for all those years, and he was a

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Speaker 2: public figure in the closet, like he had a whole

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Speaker 2: TV show, YEP and girlfriends and yeah, he had the

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Speaker 2: Carmichael Show.

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Speaker 1: He was hosting things, and he hosted the Emmys. He

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Speaker 1: won an Emmy.

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Speaker 2: Well, he hosted the Emmys. I think after he came

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Speaker 2: out of the closet, and he had a whole career

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Speaker 2: before that where he was way, way in the closet,

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Speaker 2: even with his family. He grew up in a very

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Speaker 2: religious home, so it was very challenging for him to

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Speaker 2: come out of the closet. So he talks about all

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Speaker 2: of that and then now this moment where he has

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Speaker 2: not only come out of the closet publicly, but let

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Speaker 2: everything out of the closet. Every piece of him is

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Speaker 2: out of the closet. Family issues, you know, challenges with

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Speaker 2: his dad and dating, so many dating problems. The closets

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Speaker 2: flew open for our episode for Gerard Carmichael, and so

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Speaker 2: we talked about a lot of that and what that meant.

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Speaker 2: And I learned a lot from him and I just

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Speaker 2: had a lot of I don't know, but we talked

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Speaker 2: about him being kid because you know, he used to

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Speaker 2: listen to my show as a kid, which is super sweet.

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Speaker 1: Used to tape it.

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Speaker 2: I don't know always that's always fascinating to me how

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Speaker 2: people would tape from other cities because we were only on.

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Speaker 1: In New York before the internet.

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Speaker 2: But thinking about that kid he said he was like

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Speaker 2: twelve taping the show and being in the closet and

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Speaker 2: being a fan of hip hop, and what that meant

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Speaker 2: to be a kid that age in the closet and

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Speaker 2: it being not okay for him to be out of

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Speaker 2: the closet within hip hop culture, but also where he lived,

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Speaker 2: and also being part of a family that was so religious.

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Speaker 3: You know.

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Speaker 2: Just I just learned a lot from him. I thought

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Speaker 2: he was super honest and dope and fun. What are

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Speaker 2: are what?

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Speaker 1: First of all, should we talk about his takeaway? Did

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Speaker 1: he have a takeaway? Did he leave us with one?

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Speaker 3: He did right? I felt I could go anywhere, And

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Speaker 3: that's it's the fear for me in day to day

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Speaker 3: life is that I can't go anywhere in a conversation,

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Speaker 3: that they are boundaries that I can't cross, and I

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Speaker 3: didn't feel that. So I guess my takeaway is the

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Speaker 3: comfort that I felt that I felt like I could

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Speaker 3: go to any any space. I mean, like there's a

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Speaker 3: moment like reflecting on what I'm talking about, like jerking

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Speaker 3: off after school. This is insane, like insane things, and

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Speaker 3: I'm just like, yeah, i'll say this right now. Yeah.

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Speaker 3: I felt very, very comfortable. So the takeaway is that,

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Speaker 3: I mean, you're obviously, so you're good. So this is

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Speaker 3: like you're able to make someone feel heard and feel seen.

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Speaker 3: So I felt that, And so my takeaway is that

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Speaker 3: someone will open up and share more if they have

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Speaker 3: a non judgmental host.

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Speaker 2: That sweet oh oh shush, sweet. I like that because

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Speaker 2: he did open up. I mean, you know me, I'm

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Speaker 2: always like if it's if somebody's talking about me, I'm like, eh, yeah,

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Speaker 2: you need to share that.

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Speaker 1: Humble queen, humble queen.

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Speaker 2: But it's like I don't, like, you know, I'm not

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Speaker 2: here to like, oh, look she really likes me as well.

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Speaker 1: It's not that, but it is.

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Speaker 2: It is a thing because I do think we live

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Speaker 2: in a time where there are not a lot of

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Speaker 2: spaces to do that. It's like there isn't and even

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Speaker 2: for all of us just in general, like everybody, whatever

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Speaker 2: anybody's opinion or reality if you're sharing your story, you

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Speaker 2: serve it up to be, you know, butchered, especially the

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Speaker 2: way things are set up now. So I appreciated that

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Speaker 2: he felt comfortable like that and felt comfortable sharing, But

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Speaker 2: I got to be honest. After watching his show on HBO,

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Speaker 2: it was hard for me to believe he has any

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Speaker 2: discomfort sharing anything at all. But what I learned from

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Speaker 2: this conversation was like, he's more comfortable.

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Speaker 1: It's like sharing with a reason. So it's like, it's

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Speaker 1: my reality show. Cameras are rolling, so I can ask

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Speaker 1: my dad all the things I've ever he he's motivated

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Speaker 1: by it.

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Speaker 2: He's motivated by it. He's found the way in. It's like,

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Speaker 2: I want to talk to my dad about all these

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Speaker 2: real things and I haven't been able to my whole life.

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Speaker 2: I'm going to use this opportunity. I'm shooting a reality show,

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Speaker 2: so we get a chance. We got to talk about it.

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Speaker 1: It was just his.

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Speaker 2: Vehicle for finally tapping into all this stuff, not just

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Speaker 2: about him being gay, but the fact that his parents

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Speaker 2: are not okay with it and why let's talk about it,

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Speaker 2: And also his father had a whole other family nobody's ever.

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Speaker 1: Talked about it.

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Speaker 2: I want to talk about it now, And so it

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Speaker 2: was just interesting to me how he used that as

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Speaker 2: an excuse for him to finally tackle some things, because

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Speaker 2: everybody in every family can relate to the fact that

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Speaker 2: there are things that people in the family do not

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Speaker 2: want to talk about and it is hard to get

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Speaker 2: people to crack.

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Speaker 1: I don't know.

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Speaker 2: I admired that that he found a way to do that,

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Speaker 2: that he found a way to confront his father now.

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Speaker 2: So I know people have mixed feelings about it, like

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Speaker 2: doing that on television to that man, and.

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Speaker 4: Well, bringing in members of your family. They didn't he

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Speaker 4: signed up to be a public figure. They did not

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Speaker 4: sign up to you.

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Speaker 1: Didn't they did it.

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Speaker 2: No, And I understand why people would feel a way

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Speaker 2: about it, But I also understood his take is like

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Speaker 2: he's trying to free them. Yeah, his whole family has

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Speaker 2: lived in secrecy about so many things for so long,

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Speaker 2: and he sees how it has affected them, and he

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Speaker 2: sees the difference in himself as he's come out of

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Speaker 2: the closet. He's freer. He's like your freer. He wants

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Speaker 2: that for his family. So, yeah, it's like non traditional.

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Speaker 2: It may be a little kooky. The way he's done it.

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Speaker 2: But I do admire that he's found a way to

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Speaker 2: do that. You know, I'm like, I don't know that

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Speaker 2: I would do that, but I'm like.

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Speaker 1: Okay, you got in there. Yeah you got in that wound. Yeah, yeah,

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Speaker 1: you got into it publicly.

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Speaker 4: It's also it's the basis of one of his reality

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Speaker 4: show but his comedy sets too.

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Speaker 1: It's like all rooted in truth.

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Speaker 4: Yes, deep uncomfortable truth, the most uncomfortable of truth.

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Speaker 1: Truth.

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Speaker 2: But when you think about the best comedians, that's all

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Speaker 2: it is. We talked about that a little bit too,

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Speaker 2: about like the job of a comedian. I saw somebody

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Speaker 2: say I didn't tell him to see him tell one joke.

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Speaker 2: First of all, comedians don't have to be joking every

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Speaker 2: twenty four hours a day. Comedians are full people, and

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Speaker 2: sometimes non comedic conversations can happen. And I wasn't looking

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Speaker 2: for him to be funny. I wasn't really setting him

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Speaker 2: up for the punchlines on this conversation. I was really

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Speaker 2: interested in getting to know him and his experience. But

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Speaker 2: comedians by nature analyze people the world, analyze things, and

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Speaker 2: try to find unique ways of framing them.

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Speaker 4: And as many as people were criticizing him or ridiculing

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Speaker 4: his show and his comedy special. On the other side

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Speaker 4: of that, it's also people who felt who feel inspired

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Speaker 4: by his story and could relate to growing up in

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Speaker 4: the religious household and all that stuff. I'm sure there's

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Speaker 4: other people who don't have his platform who are on

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Speaker 4: the Internet also telling their coming out stories or talking

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Speaker 4: about their toxic trauma and stuff.

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Speaker 1: You made that comment about he helps everybody gets the

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Speaker 1: reality show. Yeah, yeah, no, yeah.

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Speaker 2: I don't know that I could go that route, but

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Speaker 2: it is true that everybody is living in their own

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Speaker 2: level of a reality show. In this world that we're

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Speaker 2: in now, where everybody has an opinion, everybody has a

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Speaker 2: reality show. I love that clip that he shared about

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Speaker 2: one of his favorite comments.

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Speaker 3: I hope everybody gets their own reality show. People seem

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Speaker 3: to be aiming for again, if if you are posting,

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Speaker 3: like if you're One of my favorite responses is a

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Speaker 3: woman on TikTok. She's like recording on her phone. She's like,

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Speaker 3: what Jerrod Carmichael needs to understand is that everything don't

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Speaker 3: need to be on camera. Like, man, we're all on

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Speaker 3: the same Internet, but we're all just sharing the same Internet,

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Speaker 3: putting things out, wanting to be seen, want people to

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Speaker 3: say I see you, I hear you, I understand you,

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Speaker 3: I accept you. That's the hope, and that's what I'm

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Speaker 3: putting things out for.

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Speaker 1: That is the hope. That is the hope. But yes,

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Speaker 1: everybody has a platform.

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Speaker 2: He said something about that too when we're talking about Oprah,

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Speaker 2: because he was like, one of the reasons some people

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Speaker 2: don't like OPA's because people don't like rich people now,

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Speaker 2: so people will call people complaining because they don't like

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Speaker 2: Opra because she's rich, but they're complaining on Elon Musk's Twitter.

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Speaker 2: So everybody is involved in the same crazy universe that

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Speaker 2: we're in right now, and everybody has opinions and everybody

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Speaker 2: has thoughts.

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Speaker 1: So he's just going in extra hard.

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Speaker 2: I mean, it is kookie like there is wild stuff

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Speaker 2: and he knows that, and I think that's part of

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Speaker 2: his art.

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Speaker 4: Somebody has to do it because I'm not participating in that.

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Speaker 4: I'm strictly a watcher, a strictly a viewer. I don't

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Speaker 4: want you're.

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Speaker 2: Sitting on the Agie Martinez Iral Takeaway podcast saying not me,

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Speaker 2: I have no opinion.

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Speaker 4: I'm when it comes to my personal life, like he's

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Speaker 4: put in his there's there's no.

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Speaker 2: Secret, a strange man's foot in his mouth, literally.

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Speaker 4: Which people also had an opinion about his selection in

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Speaker 4: partner You mean race wise, Yes, yeah, well you know,

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Speaker 4: race is always sensitive for sure.

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Speaker 1: And it wasn't just that.

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Speaker 2: I mean he had made some comments that made people

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Speaker 2: really uncomfortable. But yes, I love the way he breaks

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Speaker 2: down what his relationship means to him, and because I

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Speaker 2: think anybody in an interracial relationship feels the way he

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Speaker 2: speaks about his partner. It's like, it's so hard to

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Speaker 2: find a partner I have. I have friends who are

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Speaker 2: single who would love to to find somebody who work

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Speaker 2: day and night to trying to find some job, like

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Speaker 2: a full time job, and they're like, yo, there's nothing

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Speaker 2: out here.

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Speaker 1: This doesn't work.

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Speaker 2: Like people struggling to find connection with another human being

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Speaker 2: that you could somebody you could live with, live your

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Speaker 2: life with, share experiences with equally, yoke, it is really

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Speaker 2: hard to find somebody that works with you.

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Speaker 1: Let's play the clip. Race is always gonna be sensitive,

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Speaker 1: oh for sure, especially now.

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Speaker 3: And I know I get it. I got it from

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Speaker 3: the trailer, like you know, you put it out I

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Speaker 3: got a white boyfriend. People get upset about that. People

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Speaker 3: have really, really strong feelings. It's funny because I am

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Speaker 3: in love for the first time in my life, and

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Speaker 3: here I am with someone who cares about me and

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Speaker 3: I care about him, And it's already it's hard enough

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Speaker 3: to find someone that you're compatible with just across all areas,

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Speaker 3: like like, just like I got to sleep with this person.

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Speaker 3: I'm not even talking about sex, like sleep, like compatible

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Speaker 3: in the bed, on vacation, food and interest and all

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Speaker 3: these things. You got to find somebody that you align with.

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Speaker 3: And I finally found that. And it's just like, who

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Speaker 3: cares what race that person is. I'm just so thankful

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Speaker 3: to have somebody. I'm so thankful.

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Speaker 1: How can you find on that?

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Speaker 2: Yeah, I get theories about like how people think, you know,

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Speaker 2: it's better to raise two children if you're you know,

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Speaker 2: legacy and things like that.

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Speaker 1: I understand those conversations.

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Speaker 4: About being like with another black person, yeah, or whatever

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Speaker 4: your religion.

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Speaker 2: You know, there's reasons why people like to marry people

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Speaker 2: who are within their community and create children with people

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Speaker 2: within their community, whether it be race, religion, ethnicity, whatever.

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Speaker 2: I do understand that, But I also feel him like,

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Speaker 2: it's hard to find a partner, and if you find somebody,

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Speaker 2: then why should anybody outside of that relationship have any

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Speaker 2: input on how you live in your life. They're obviously

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Speaker 2: very happy too. He speaks so high his boyfriend.

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Speaker 4: It's like he's like he's every even in the other

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Speaker 4: interviews that he has, he's like, my boyfriend's smarter than me.

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Speaker 4: He's so well read, he's with whatever. Like, no, he's

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Speaker 4: in love. Yeah, yeah, he's like in full love. It

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Speaker 4: was really sweet and cute.

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Speaker 1: I really liked that part. I also liked what he

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Speaker 1: said about friendship, about.

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Speaker 2: How you know, sometimes if you are gay, and especially

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Speaker 2: when you come from a family who does not accept

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Speaker 2: you as such, you have to kind of create your

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Speaker 2: own family when you don't feel supported and you don't

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Speaker 2: feel part of your natural born family kind of you know,

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Speaker 2: doesn't connect with you or tosses you away in some cases.

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Speaker 1: How important it is to create your own family. Friendship

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Speaker 1: seems like it's important thing.

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Speaker 3: Very important. Well, I mean that's kind of the gay thing,

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Speaker 3: like the chosen family, because you feel alienated from your family,

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Speaker 3: and so then you build, like you rebuild your family

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Speaker 3: with your friends and your life and that's a very

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Speaker 3: common thing amongst gay people who come out who have

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Speaker 3: a rough experience at home, and so my friends became

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Speaker 3: my family.

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Speaker 2: I love that clip. Yeah, because I see that clip

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Speaker 2: in real life. My friends who are gay like different.

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Speaker 2: You know, the friends circle is very strong and it

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Speaker 2: is family. It feels like family.

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Speaker 4: Yeah, what I mean historically, if you know anything about

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Speaker 4: like ballroom culture, there also used to be another show

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Speaker 4: on HBO called Legendary and it was about it was

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Speaker 4: basically like a dance competition show between these houses. And

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Speaker 4: houses were made up of people who are from the

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Speaker 4: LGBTQ community, and they have mothers and fathers who are

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Speaker 4: like ordained there and they form like a family of

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Speaker 4: not related by blood, but people who watch over each

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Speaker 4: other and sometimes they live in the same house and

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Speaker 4: they do things together.

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Speaker 1: They offer resources to each other.

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Speaker 4: So that's been like a longstanding historical practice that Yeah,

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Speaker 4: that community has upheld which has been important to them

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Speaker 4: even till this day.

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Speaker 2: Yeah, he broke it down. I just love the way

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Speaker 2: he's just said it so simply, and I don't know

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Speaker 2: I felt that, and you see it in the show too.

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Speaker 2: You see his commitment to his friendships.

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Speaker 4: It's my favorite part of the show. Yeah, because yeah, no,

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Speaker 4: I'm gonna pass on that part. I mean, it's beautiful

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Speaker 4: that he supports that. But I love how he he

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Speaker 4: had two major friends on the show and he took

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Speaker 4: both of them in, let them sleep in his home,

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Speaker 4: doesn't have to pay, and like also nurtured their dreams.

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Speaker 4: Like one of his best friends was a comedian and

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Speaker 4: he put him on tour without ever having experienced. He

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Speaker 4: was like, yeah, have you opened for me? And some

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Speaker 4: nights it wasn't good all it was terrible. But he

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Speaker 4: loves his friends so much that he was willing to

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Speaker 4: open up his resources to do that. And I'm like,

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Speaker 4: if that's not a good friend, I don't know what is.

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Speaker 4: And even with his other friend, he has another friend

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Speaker 4: who she really wanted to be an actress, no experience.

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Speaker 4: He moves her into the house and she starts taking

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Speaker 4: classes and yeah, she's not that great either, but you

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Speaker 4: know he's maybe somebody watched the show was like, screw it,

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Speaker 4: let me give this girl a shot.

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Speaker 1: I got I got a character three roll for her.

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Speaker 1: It was real love there. It was real love there

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Speaker 1: with his friendship. So I love to see that too.

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Speaker 4: People can pick him apart all he wants, but like

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Speaker 4: his whole point I think with the reality show, with

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Speaker 4: doing this episode with you is like I'm showing you

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Speaker 4: the good, the bad, the ugly. Yes, take it how

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Speaker 4: you want to take and I'm gonna take the darts

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Speaker 4: as they come. But at the end of the day,

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Speaker 4: here's my truth.

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Speaker 2: And a lot of that has to do with the

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Speaker 2: fact that when he was a young boy in the closet,

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Speaker 2: he didn't see himself anywhere. He didn't see anything that

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Speaker 2: helped him to cope, Yeah, to help him deal with

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Speaker 2: the guilt, because he had a lot of guilt. So

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Speaker 2: that is also one of the reasons for him being

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Speaker 2: so transparent is that is he wanted, he wants to

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Speaker 2: be what he needed as a kid. So I found

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Speaker 2: that interesting and I saw one of the comments in

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Speaker 2: the YouTube post was that they said it was about

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Speaker 2: him saying that jay Z was the art tect of

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Speaker 2: his personality, which some people might find strange.

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Speaker 1: But he is a fan of hip hop, like he

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Speaker 1: is a hip hop for He's used to take my show.

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Speaker 2: He was breaking down for me like verbatim some of

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Speaker 2: my jay Z interviews, And it's not that strange to me,

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Speaker 2: and I do like the fact when he talks about

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Speaker 2: Jay and Jay being supportive of his career and it

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Speaker 2: being about the art, because I think for Gerard it

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Speaker 2: really is an artistic expression. As maybe hard as it

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Speaker 2: is for some people to watch, I think it really.

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Speaker 1: Truly to him is his art.

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Speaker 2: If you watch his even the special before this reality show,

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Speaker 2: it is something very artistic about the way in which

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Speaker 2: he delivers his specials. So anyway, definitely worth checking out.

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Speaker 2: If you haven't watched the whole episode, you should. It's

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Speaker 2: on YouTube right now and given show a chance, and

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Speaker 2: maybe maybe if you tried before the interview, you may

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Speaker 2: feel differently about it after hearing his full story. So

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Speaker 2: I loved him, especially as we're giving up by the

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Speaker 2: way for Pride. Pride starts June, right, yep, Yeah. I

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Speaker 2: liked that this conversation was our first. I love that

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Speaker 2: that's how we launched it. It was different. We hadn't

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Speaker 2: talked about it, we hadn't really talked about sexuality munch

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Speaker 2: in any other episodes, and so I really enjoyed this conversation.

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Speaker 2: I felt like I really learned a lot from him,

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Speaker 2: And if you haven't checked it, out yet. You should

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Speaker 2: absolutely do that, and we're getting ready to drop. Next

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Speaker 2: week we'll do a new episode.

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Speaker 1: We are back.

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Speaker 2: Irl is back our next episode. Should I say it

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Speaker 2: now in advance?

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Speaker 1: Do it? Oh my gosh. We're pivoting a little bit

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Speaker 1: for sure every episode. But by the way, this season

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Speaker 1: is a lot of pivots. You think we're going in

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Speaker 1: one direction and we're gonna go somewhere else. On you.

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Speaker 2: Our next episode is somebody that I admire a lot

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Speaker 2: to Sarah Jakes Roberts du Da DA d d DA.

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Speaker 1: This is Tdjakes's daughter.

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Speaker 2: Yep, very successful pastor, pregnant at the age of thirteen.

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Speaker 2: Could you be imagined being pregnant at the age of

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Speaker 2: thirteen and being the daughter of TD Jake's and he's

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Speaker 2: already TD Jakes, I'm a cover magazines. She is thirteen,

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Speaker 2: at home, pregnant and somehow winds up becoming a pastor.

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Speaker 2: So definitely check it out.

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Speaker 1: We are back. Thank you to Gerard Carmichael for an

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Speaker 1: amazing conversation.

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Speaker 2: If you haven't checked it out yet, please do and

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Speaker 2: stay tuned for our next episode and we will be

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Speaker 2: back right here. Thanks guys. Go to YouTube, subscribe, Edge

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Speaker 2: Martinez IRL