WEBVTT - Kristen Doute 0:00:00.160 --> 0:00:02.640 This is what happens when I have a friend on 0:00:02.680 --> 0:00:09.640 the podcast. We just dive right in. Welcome back to 0:00:09.680 --> 0:00:13.239 the Give Them All a Podcast. I have a dear 0:00:13.320 --> 0:00:17.840 friend of mine, Kristen Dody, and I love that she. 0:00:17.840 --> 0:00:20.400 She just rolled in here looking sheaic as fuck and 0:00:20.440 --> 0:00:24.520 it's like said something about diarrhea, and I was like, 0:00:24.880 --> 0:00:26.439 she was walking down the hall, I hear it. She 0:00:26.480 --> 0:00:29.639 comes in the office. I was like, hold up, you 0:00:29.720 --> 0:00:32.080 have diarrhea, but you're. 0:00:32.360 --> 0:00:35.680 Ever say I might have COVID and walking into your 0:00:35.680 --> 0:00:39.360 office and saying I have diarrhea. I do not have diarrhea. 0:00:39.680 --> 0:00:41.400 I would admit if I did to you. 0:00:41.720 --> 0:00:44.240 Okay, good because I'm y old, like thin right now, 0:00:44.240 --> 0:00:46.280 trying to pack on the pounds. So anything that's going 0:00:46.360 --> 0:00:48.960 to make me have diarrhea or throw up, I just 0:00:48.960 --> 0:00:49.680 can't afford it. 0:00:50.240 --> 0:00:54.800 My my friend, my Luke, who my my co host 0:00:55.040 --> 0:00:56.560 on my podcast. 0:00:56.480 --> 0:01:01.720 Your podcast, Sex Love and What Else Matter with Kristin Dodie. 0:01:01.560 --> 0:01:06.000 Because nothing else does it really doesn't. Luke left town yesterday. 0:01:06.040 --> 0:01:08.680 He's been in la He lives in Colorado. He left 0:01:08.680 --> 0:01:12.280 town yesterday to go home and handle some shit. And 0:01:12.480 --> 0:01:15.839 while he's handling his shit, I'm handling his German shepherd's shit. 0:01:16.040 --> 0:01:18.160 I'm telling you, I think getting harder than a baby. 0:01:18.160 --> 0:01:20.199 What do you think you have a one? I don't. 0:01:20.400 --> 0:01:22.640 I feel like a human would never make me feel that, 0:01:22.760 --> 0:01:25.240 like stressed out, because it's like, but it's my baby, 0:01:25.720 --> 0:01:28.320 Like yeah, it's streussful. I'll tell you sitting and stuff, 0:01:28.360 --> 0:01:30.440 but it's my purse, it's my little baby. 0:01:30.640 --> 0:01:33.560 One percent. Your baby is like your baby, and I'm 0:01:33.600 --> 0:01:35.800 sure there are people out there. Your dog is like 0:01:35.840 --> 0:01:39.479 your baby, and I'm sure there are people out there 0:01:39.480 --> 0:01:42.480 who don't have a connection to children and their dogs 0:01:42.520 --> 0:01:45.920 really are their babies. As someone who has always wanted 0:01:46.040 --> 0:01:51.560 kids but is dog obsessed, like Lily is my baby, 0:01:51.600 --> 0:01:54.760 and I've said to her, said to Lily even when 0:01:54.760 --> 0:01:57.480 I was pregnant, I was like, don't worry because I 0:01:57.520 --> 0:02:00.080 could never love this baby as much as I love you, 0:02:00.200 --> 0:02:05.880 Like there's just no possible way. And then yeah, ocean 0:02:05.960 --> 0:02:08.440 like slip and slide it out of my vagina, and 0:02:08.480 --> 0:02:12.679 it was like, really sorry. 0:02:12.080 --> 0:02:14.680 I know, and I was I listened. I was listening 0:02:14.720 --> 0:02:17.760 to your last podcast when Easton came back on with 0:02:17.840 --> 0:02:20.239 you guys, and in the very beginning, you said I 0:02:20.280 --> 0:02:23.320 wish everyone could experience my baby, and I'm like, I 0:02:23.400 --> 0:02:26.880 do too, I wish everyone could experience ocean because Jess 0:02:26.880 --> 0:02:30.119 posted a selfie video that ocean. 0:02:29.880 --> 0:02:33.359 Took selfie video that ocean took his and I immediately 0:02:33.480 --> 0:02:35.000 wrote you and I said, I have one of those 0:02:35.040 --> 0:02:36.680 on my phone too, from Thanksgiving. 0:02:36.919 --> 0:02:39.760 You do, And she's like holding the phone up like 0:02:39.840 --> 0:02:41.320 she's taking a selfie and good light. 0:02:41.760 --> 0:02:44.640 Actually she's seen that evil from No It's incredible. 0:02:44.800 --> 0:02:47.399 Kyle saw that on my phone and he said, did 0:02:47.440 --> 0:02:48.640 she take that video herself? 0:02:48.639 --> 0:02:50.520 And I said, yeah, she does. He's at wait, he 0:02:50.680 --> 0:02:52.800 like was shocked. He's like, no, she's a genius. 0:02:52.880 --> 0:02:54.480 She is? Is she? 0:02:55.400 --> 0:02:59.240 I don't know, but like last night, Okay, So she 0:02:59.480 --> 0:03:02.440 gets these little rashes where her diaper sits on her 0:03:02.520 --> 0:03:04.960 legs because she's got little legs. 0:03:04.600 --> 0:03:05.880 She's a little. 0:03:06.680 --> 0:03:10.960 And she's a tiny little tot, but she's keeping like 0:03:11.520 --> 0:03:13.240 an almost two year old, so there's like a lot. 0:03:13.280 --> 0:03:14.919 So we got to size up in the diapers, right, 0:03:14.960 --> 0:03:18.560 So the diapers are baggy, but they fill up pretty quick. 0:03:19.160 --> 0:03:21.400 But she knows that when I change her dipe that 0:03:21.560 --> 0:03:25.240 I put cream on the little like I guess rashes 0:03:25.280 --> 0:03:28.840 on her legs. She has her baby out yesterday. You 0:03:28.880 --> 0:03:32.600 guys with the diaper with the wipes like those little 0:03:32.639 --> 0:03:35.160 bitty babies or whatever from American Girl. You can get 0:03:35.160 --> 0:03:37.800 all the little stuff and there's diaper rash cream. And 0:03:37.840 --> 0:03:41.440 I'm watching her dabbit on both of the inside of 0:03:41.480 --> 0:03:42.840 the baby's legs. 0:03:43.800 --> 0:03:48.440 Is she's sucking genius? She actually is. 0:03:50.640 --> 0:03:53.360 Back to what I was going to say about the dogs. 0:03:53.960 --> 0:03:57.440 I feel like dogs actually are harder. And here's why. 0:03:57.520 --> 0:04:00.680 Because a baby, like is only a baby for so long, 0:04:00.720 --> 0:04:03.880 and then they with every day that passes, they become 0:04:03.880 --> 0:04:06.320 more and more independent, right, and they know how to 0:04:06.520 --> 0:04:08.480 they learn how to how to communicate. 0:04:08.760 --> 0:04:11.440 A dog is basically a newborn forever. 0:04:11.640 --> 0:04:16.600 Yes, So that's where it is very different. So you 0:04:16.640 --> 0:04:19.800 basically have four new newborns living in your house, Like they. 0:04:19.720 --> 0:04:23.120 Know how to communicate as much as they can buttrist, 0:04:23.200 --> 0:04:25.400 but they just depend on me the way that a 0:04:25.440 --> 0:04:27.240 newborn does. Like you have to let me outside, you 0:04:27.320 --> 0:04:28.520 have to feed me, you have to give me water, 0:04:28.560 --> 0:04:29.279 you have to play with me. 0:04:30.360 --> 0:04:33.680 And if I have to project, I'll pop everywhere and 0:04:33.720 --> 0:04:36.320 I can't get outside quick enough and I can't sit 0:04:36.360 --> 0:04:37.120 on a toilet. 0:04:36.880 --> 0:04:38.520 And I backyard anymore. 0:04:39.040 --> 0:04:40.840 You know what, they'll baby, you'll get there. Let's talk 0:04:40.880 --> 0:04:44.680 about that because I was there when you became a homeowner. 0:04:45.000 --> 0:04:48.840 I was there when you sold your home, and we 0:04:49.400 --> 0:04:51.480 I didn't like it as like a going away party. 0:04:51.480 --> 0:04:55.200 It was more like, let's celebrate Ben, it's new beginnings. 0:04:55.400 --> 0:04:57.560 But it was not the new beginning I was looking for. 0:04:58.160 --> 0:05:00.720 Well, girl, I feel you on that. It's a very stratch. 0:05:01.040 --> 0:05:06.559 We're in similar positions, although very not but still having 0:05:07.200 --> 0:05:10.440 with someone else into their home and starting a life 0:05:10.720 --> 0:05:14.600 totally thought. Granted I was not engaged or with child, 0:05:15.480 --> 0:05:16.520 but just yeah. 0:05:16.400 --> 0:05:20.760 But you know what I really and situations are are relative, 0:05:20.880 --> 0:05:23.080 you know, like you could be going through something completely 0:05:23.120 --> 0:05:25.960 different than me, and our pain could be the exact same. 0:05:26.120 --> 0:05:28.560 Like who is one to judge which is more painful 0:05:28.560 --> 0:05:32.200 than the other, doesn't matter. Pain is pain. So you 0:05:32.720 --> 0:05:35.640 having to sell this home that you had worked for 0:05:35.640 --> 0:05:39.159 for your entire life? Yeah, I mean what was like 0:05:39.200 --> 0:05:42.120 the morning process of that. I've never been a homeowner. 0:05:42.839 --> 0:05:46.640 Oh my god. I mean, I'll like start at the 0:05:46.839 --> 0:05:50.279 end and work backwards. But like the very very last night, 0:05:50.960 --> 0:05:54.480 I almost just slept in a sleeping bag, But like 0:05:54.640 --> 0:05:58.240 I stayed there for so long and just cried on 0:05:58.240 --> 0:05:59.960 my back. I could like cry right not thinking about it. 0:06:00.120 --> 0:06:03.520 I cried on my back patio. Like a couple of 0:06:03.520 --> 0:06:07.200 people came over, like a neighbor and Zach, my best friend, 0:06:07.240 --> 0:06:10.760 and like came over and we had a glass of wine. 0:06:10.760 --> 0:06:13.760 But I mostly just like sat there just staring at everything, 0:06:13.839 --> 0:06:17.400 like no furniture. These people are about to like come 0:06:17.480 --> 0:06:20.920 take over the especially because I didn't buy a turn keyhouse, 0:06:20.960 --> 0:06:23.320 you know, like I love it. I put a lot 0:06:23.320 --> 0:06:25.520 of work, a lot of love, a lot of money, 0:06:26.040 --> 0:06:29.720 a lot of money. So yeah, I still have this 0:06:29.760 --> 0:06:32.400 feeling like one day it's going to be my second home. 0:06:32.480 --> 0:06:35.840 One day I'm going to be so stupid wealthy that 0:06:35.920 --> 0:06:37.960 I'm just going to go back to those people or 0:06:37.960 --> 0:06:40.039 whoever owns it, and I'll be like, what do you 0:06:40.040 --> 0:06:43.360 want for it? That's amazing? Do you realize I need it? 0:06:43.440 --> 0:06:47.120 You're manifesting right now on this podcast, And I believe 0:06:47.160 --> 0:06:48.320 in that wholeheartedly. 0:06:48.680 --> 0:06:51.440 Yeah, I've driven by it twice. I won't do it again. 0:06:51.560 --> 0:06:55.560 They've painted it like this ugly shade of like elephant 0:06:55.720 --> 0:06:58.960 sad gray and with like a black mesh fence around it. 0:06:59.080 --> 0:07:03.839 I'm like, this house was like magical and amsicle. 0:07:03.480 --> 0:07:06.880 No, very whimsical. It felt like you were in a 0:07:07.080 --> 0:07:13.600 story book. Yeah, like the fence and just all of it. 0:07:13.600 --> 0:07:16.160 It was like I feel like I'm in a nursery rhyme. 0:07:16.600 --> 0:07:19.680 Yeah, and that was was that a lot of your doing? 0:07:19.720 --> 0:07:21.920 You said you didn't buy a turnkey house, so was 0:07:21.960 --> 0:07:23.480 a lot of it there when you moved in or 0:07:23.480 --> 0:07:25.679 did you move in and just put all of that work. 0:07:25.520 --> 0:07:28.360 Into the vibe? It was I bought the house because 0:07:28.400 --> 0:07:30.680 of the vibe. Okay, I knew going in. I had 0:07:30.720 --> 0:07:34.040 to like knock down walls, redo floors, like gut things. 0:07:34.120 --> 0:07:36.000 I got it almost the whole backyard. But it was 0:07:36.120 --> 0:07:39.600 just like something about that house I kept like the 0:07:39.680 --> 0:07:41.320 day that I saw it. I just like I would 0:07:41.320 --> 0:07:43.040 walk out to the street, take a moment, I'm like, 0:07:43.040 --> 0:07:44.640 I gotta go back in. I gotta go back in. 0:07:44.760 --> 0:07:44.960 Yeah. 0:07:45.160 --> 0:07:47.760 It was just like with a dog, you like meet 0:07:47.800 --> 0:07:51.120 your dog, like you know that that's your animal. It's 0:07:51.120 --> 0:07:54.480 like I knew that was my house, regardless of how 0:07:54.560 --> 0:07:55.680 much work it was going to take. 0:07:56.360 --> 0:07:59.200 I am curious though, with your house, Kristen, do you 0:07:59.320 --> 0:08:02.240 think you had so much attachment and love to it. 0:08:02.240 --> 0:08:04.320 I mean, I'm sure there's many many reasons, Like you said, 0:08:04.320 --> 0:08:05.560 you put so much work into it. 0:08:06.200 --> 0:08:09.640 Did you go through some like deep changes there or 0:08:09.840 --> 0:08:11.360 like find yourself for? 0:08:11.480 --> 0:08:12.480 How long were you there? 0:08:12.560 --> 0:08:14.320 Yeah? Oh my god, I was there two and a 0:08:14.320 --> 0:08:17.920 half years. But it was like the most independent I 0:08:17.960 --> 0:08:20.480 had ever felt, because I had just broken up with 0:08:20.680 --> 0:08:24.480 my ex boyfriend Carter and kept my apartment for a 0:08:24.520 --> 0:08:26.680 couple of months, like in the interim while I was 0:08:26.720 --> 0:08:29.200 like making changes, but I really like moved in there 0:08:29.240 --> 0:08:32.520 on my own. At that time, I was still doing 0:08:32.520 --> 0:08:36.200 the show vander Pump and then I got my book deal. 0:08:36.679 --> 0:08:39.640 I wrote my entire book in that house, in that 0:08:39.720 --> 0:08:42.640 backyard and like a little bit in Palm Springs but whatever, 0:08:43.240 --> 0:08:46.400 and like I had a James May office and I 0:08:46.520 --> 0:08:49.000 was just I was fucking thriving. 0:08:49.280 --> 0:08:52.680 Yeah, like at her arriving home, it was her house, 0:08:52.720 --> 0:08:55.920 and then you went out to like this amazing backyard 0:08:55.960 --> 0:08:58.560 which was also just like such a few The whole 0:08:58.600 --> 0:09:01.560 thing was very feel good. Yeah, but there was a second. 0:09:02.200 --> 0:09:03.720 It was the garage that was converted. 0:09:03.840 --> 0:09:07.000 It was converted, but she had it was amazing. It 0:09:07.080 --> 0:09:10.079 was beautifully done. And she had like cute chairs and 0:09:10.120 --> 0:09:12.360 her neon sign that said James May and all of 0:09:12.400 --> 0:09:15.040 her area where she would package things. So it was 0:09:15.080 --> 0:09:17.800 not only like a feel good home, but it was 0:09:17.880 --> 0:09:19.240 also very functional. 0:09:19.320 --> 0:09:22.959 It was just like productive totally because essentially that like 0:09:23.000 --> 0:09:25.360 the like long story short, but the office was meant 0:09:25.400 --> 0:09:28.720 to be kind of like a showroom. At the time, 0:09:28.720 --> 0:09:32.160 I had an office downtown in Downtown, LA where I 0:09:32.160 --> 0:09:33.960 had people like packing all my stuff. But then the 0:09:34.000 --> 0:09:37.240 pandemic hit right a year after I got it, so 0:09:37.320 --> 0:09:39.480 it was like we had to get out of Downtown. 0:09:39.679 --> 0:09:42.480 I wasn't you know, we were in legit lockdown where 0:09:42.480 --> 0:09:44.160 we weren't even allowed in that building anymore. So we 0:09:44.160 --> 0:09:46.840 had to move all of our inventory. But I was like, oh, 0:09:46.880 --> 0:09:50.560 thank god, I have all this space. Yeah, let's do 0:09:50.679 --> 0:09:54.400 the damn thing. That's an actual functional office, not just 0:09:54.440 --> 0:09:55.040 a showroom. 0:09:55.200 --> 0:09:58.320 There's going to be seasons, and it sounds so fucking cheesy, 0:09:58.360 --> 0:10:01.600 and until you're in experiencing seasons of life, you just 0:10:01.720 --> 0:10:03.560 have to roll with it and go, I don't know 0:10:03.600 --> 0:10:06.400 why the fuck this is happening, but what I do 0:10:06.559 --> 0:10:12.520 know is nothing less forever correct, and you you in 0:10:12.559 --> 0:10:14.800 those moments We talk about this all the time, just 0:10:14.840 --> 0:10:17.920 and I. In those moments you choose am I sinking 0:10:18.160 --> 0:10:22.319 or am I swimming? I like that and you fucking swam. 0:10:22.600 --> 0:10:25.720 Yeah, and even that I'm trying water for sure. 0:10:25.960 --> 0:10:27.839 Hey, I guess why your head is above water? 0:10:27.960 --> 0:10:28.640 Dish. Yeah. 0:10:28.679 --> 0:10:31.280 So whatever type of technique you're doing, it don't matter, 0:10:31.960 --> 0:10:35.120 all right, And you have incredible people around you. And 0:10:35.160 --> 0:10:38.880 I have to say, I don't realize, or didn't realize 0:10:38.920 --> 0:10:42.600 how sensitive my friend Kristen is. She comes off as 0:10:42.640 --> 0:10:44.640 a real tough bitch, like, I think you might be 0:10:44.679 --> 0:10:45.520 more sensitive than me. 0:10:45.679 --> 0:10:49.480 Oh, I'm way more sensitive than you. But you're fine, Aquarius. 0:10:49.679 --> 0:10:51.840 But I'm like right on the cusp of Pisces. So 0:10:51.880 --> 0:10:54.600 I feel like I have all that like emo Pisces 0:10:54.640 --> 0:10:57.920 in me. Okay, right, I'm just like my sister and 0:10:57.960 --> 0:10:59.959 I talk about all the time because whenever I needed, 0:11:00.280 --> 0:11:02.640 like I call my sister about something going on in 0:11:02.640 --> 0:11:04.679 my life, She's like, do you want advice or do 0:11:04.720 --> 0:11:07.600 you just want me to listen? Because my sister is 0:11:07.640 --> 0:11:10.360 a cancer and I can I don't understand cancers to 0:11:10.400 --> 0:11:12.559 save my life. We have so many cancers in our 0:11:12.600 --> 0:11:15.240 life on the cast and and none of them are 0:11:15.240 --> 0:11:18.120 the same. But like my sister is like she always 0:11:18.160 --> 0:11:20.720 says she doesn't feel feelings, and I was like, well, 0:11:20.760 --> 0:11:22.560 I feel them enough for the both of us, right, 0:11:22.600 --> 0:11:24.720 you don't need to feel feelings. Maybe I got that comfort. 0:11:26.120 --> 0:11:28.880 So I cried one time because there was a Luke 0:11:28.920 --> 0:11:33.360 and I were in Colorado and on the ranch where 0:11:33.400 --> 0:11:35.840 my friend Rachel Ryan lives. Blah blah blah. Talked about 0:11:35.840 --> 0:11:38.760 it on my podcast The Ranch. But it's the most beautiful, 0:11:38.880 --> 0:11:43.040 like clear skies. You know, there's nothing around which is beauty, 0:11:43.240 --> 0:11:46.080 just like la. But one time we were looking and 0:11:46.120 --> 0:11:48.000 I was not on like mushrooms or anything. I wasn't 0:11:48.000 --> 0:11:50.200 even stoned, and We're looking at the sky and I 0:11:50.240 --> 0:11:52.559 saw this cloud that was like nowhere near all the 0:11:52.600 --> 0:11:55.559 other clouds. And I was like, that clouds so lonely, 0:11:56.640 --> 0:11:58.760 and I got so sad for that cloud. And I 0:11:58.800 --> 0:12:00.920 was like, it needs to like go with its friends. 0:12:01.200 --> 0:12:03.480 He's like, are you really fucking sad about a cloud? 0:12:03.559 --> 0:12:04.000 Right now? 0:12:04.280 --> 0:12:07.280 You know what, though, Kristen, I so relate to that, 0:12:08.440 --> 0:12:09.760 Like if I were to see that, I'd be like 0:12:09.800 --> 0:12:12.840 I'm that cloud, Like there's something about that cloud, like 0:12:13.000 --> 0:12:14.200 I'm identifying with it. 0:12:14.760 --> 0:12:16.440 Can you go to the movies alone, either of you? 0:12:17.120 --> 0:12:18.319 I can't, but Kyle can. 0:12:18.320 --> 0:12:19.000 He loves it. 0:12:19.240 --> 0:12:20.719 Oh, I think I don't even want to go to 0:12:20.800 --> 0:12:23.600 the movies with people. No can you? No? 0:12:23.960 --> 0:12:25.959 No, no, you can't enjoy it alone. 0:12:26.040 --> 0:12:28.679 I can't like just go to a restaurant alone if 0:12:28.679 --> 0:12:30.840 I have my computer with me and my dogs, and 0:12:30.880 --> 0:12:33.160 I'm like, I need to get out of the apartment. 0:12:33.240 --> 0:12:36.319 I just need to like be somewhere more open with sunshine, 0:12:36.440 --> 0:12:39.280 okay if I'm working. But I can't just like go 0:12:39.480 --> 0:12:41.800 enjoy a meal alone, Okay, I just I need to 0:12:41.880 --> 0:12:43.040 like connect with people. 0:12:43.360 --> 0:12:45.800 So is it more of it's not that you can't 0:12:46.000 --> 0:12:48.040 go by yourself, or is it like I just don't 0:12:48.080 --> 0:12:48.400 want to. 0:12:48.480 --> 0:12:49.040 I don't want to. 0:12:49.200 --> 0:12:50.000 I don't want to either. 0:12:50.120 --> 0:12:53.200 Yeah, of course, I'm like, yeah, capable, But how boring 0:12:53.280 --> 0:12:53.800 is that. 0:12:53.679 --> 0:12:55.640 Some people thrive I get what you're saying, though, some 0:12:55.679 --> 0:12:58.360 people thrive off that. When I used to like wait tables, 0:12:58.360 --> 0:13:00.520 there would be women who come in, they get their book, 0:13:00.679 --> 0:13:03.080 they have a glass of wine, they're sitting there. 0:13:03.120 --> 0:13:05.280 They sit there for Oh honey, when I was a drinker, 0:13:05.960 --> 0:13:09.840 I don't even need anybody because I'm seeing double of everything. 0:13:11.400 --> 0:13:12.559 Some people drive. 0:13:12.679 --> 0:13:14.640 What I drink. The last thing I want to do 0:13:14.760 --> 0:13:17.959 is go drink alone somewhere like the point for me 0:13:18.120 --> 0:13:21.960 of like having a glass of wine. It's like a moment, 0:13:22.080 --> 0:13:25.120 it's an experience. It's like sharing. Totally. 0:13:25.200 --> 0:13:30.040 I get what you mean camaraderie, Yes, totally, I completely 0:13:30.040 --> 0:13:32.880 get it. But I realized the first time that you 0:13:32.960 --> 0:13:35.560 were as sensitive as you are, which now I know 0:13:35.600 --> 0:13:38.600 I got a baby, my friend. The first time was 0:13:38.640 --> 0:13:42.120 when Andy Cohen asked me who would you trust the 0:13:42.240 --> 0:13:45.520 least with watching your kid? Now, let me be very 0:13:45.640 --> 0:13:48.440 very clear my cast, even though I don't connect with 0:13:48.480 --> 0:13:50.800 all of them, like, I believe that if I were 0:13:50.840 --> 0:13:53.760 to leave my daughter with a person on the cast, 0:13:54.040 --> 0:13:57.240 she would be very well taken care of, especially Kristin Doty, 0:13:57.320 --> 0:14:00.400 because you're great with children. I know that she would 0:14:00.480 --> 0:14:02.719 not only be loved, I know she'd be fed, and 0:14:02.760 --> 0:14:05.280 I know she'd have a fucking fun time. All right. 0:14:06.640 --> 0:14:08.600 But for me, it was like a lighthearted question, right, 0:14:08.679 --> 0:14:10.360 and when I think of Chris and Dotie and I 0:14:10.400 --> 0:14:12.880 love her so much, she is the carwashman. 0:14:13.520 --> 0:14:15.200 You know that was the inflatable ones. 0:14:15.320 --> 0:14:18.040 Okay, So I thought I was making a lighthearted joke 0:14:18.200 --> 0:14:21.680 about it, and I hurt your feelings. And I've apologized 0:14:21.680 --> 0:14:23.600 to you, but I want to tell you I'm so 0:14:23.680 --> 0:14:27.440 sorry that I hurt your feelings. Sometimes I'm sensitive, I know, 0:14:27.520 --> 0:14:28.640 and I'm gonna baby you more. 0:14:28.800 --> 0:14:32.800 I cried. I was like, oh, why would she say that? 0:14:32.920 --> 0:14:35.840 Like now, and I'm the oldest girl and I don't 0:14:35.880 --> 0:14:38.560 have a baby yet, and now everyone's gonna think that 0:14:38.600 --> 0:14:39.880 I'd make a bad mom. 0:14:40.640 --> 0:14:43.680 That was by the way, if it was Oprah who 0:14:43.720 --> 0:14:46.480 was asking me that question, I wouldn't have said that. 0:14:46.560 --> 0:14:49.160 But it was like, yeah, Andy Cohen, the shows like 0:14:49.640 --> 0:14:53.960 it makes light of the chaos. So I'm sorry that 0:14:54.000 --> 0:14:54.320 I did. 0:14:54.360 --> 0:14:58.360 That was like, you could have said, James Kennedy, do. 0:14:58.280 --> 0:14:58.880 You would you? 0:14:58.960 --> 0:15:02.360 I was gonna ask j would you if you had 0:15:02.360 --> 0:15:05.160 to leave ocean with James for five hours? 0:15:06.880 --> 0:15:09.240 Oh? I don't know. 0:15:10.120 --> 0:15:15.120 No, no, and not because I don't trust him. There's 0:15:15.240 --> 0:15:18.240 just so many things that could go wrong. You know, 0:15:18.800 --> 0:15:20.960 you leave a gate open, she could fall down the 0:15:20.960 --> 0:15:23.680 stairs if he smokes pot like and he lives a 0:15:23.800 --> 0:15:26.320 very fun single in the sense where he doesn't have 0:15:26.400 --> 0:15:29.840 children or a wife. But even if you're a great parent, 0:15:29.920 --> 0:15:33.160 like accidents happened, so I would I would just be nervous. 0:15:33.640 --> 0:15:36.200 I would like if ocean came to my apartment. I 0:15:36.400 --> 0:15:39.120 mean there's like nothing. I'm literally thinking, there's nothing sharp. 0:15:39.800 --> 0:15:43.160 I would Amazon immediately the outlet plug, cover things, and 0:15:43.200 --> 0:15:44.920 then just like bubble wrap some stuff. 0:15:45.000 --> 0:15:48.360 Yeah, totally, there you go. And you gotta be like. 0:15:48.400 --> 0:15:50.320 I'm gonna be as a mom, like I want to 0:15:50.320 --> 0:15:52.600 be the mom that's like let them fall, let them 0:15:52.680 --> 0:15:56.080 experience it, like it's gonna be okay. But I literally 0:15:56.120 --> 0:15:58.520 feel like I'm gonna bubble wrap my entire house. You 0:15:58.600 --> 0:16:00.720 can just follow them around. Yeah. 0:16:00.840 --> 0:16:03.920 No. And by the way, compared to my friends, like 0:16:04.080 --> 0:16:07.040 they went all out when the kids were a certain age, 0:16:07.040 --> 0:16:10.200 Like now as they get a little bit older, things changed. 0:16:10.240 --> 0:16:12.320 You aren't worried about things that you may have. 0:16:12.480 --> 0:16:14.000 I was about to ask you that I been worried 0:16:14.000 --> 0:16:16.280 about because I obviously I have no notion since she 0:16:16.360 --> 0:16:19.840 was a teeny tiny toime. Yeah, newborn, But like when 0:16:19.920 --> 0:16:22.280 do you feel like it got easier, Like when you 0:16:22.360 --> 0:16:26.240 just went, oh, okay, I'm a mom, Now this is easy, 0:16:26.360 --> 0:16:29.440 Like she's developing, Like I don't have to be so 0:16:29.600 --> 0:16:30.720 freaked out all the time. 0:16:31.120 --> 0:16:35.000 Well, I remember the first time she bled, which I 0:16:35.000 --> 0:16:38.000 think you were there, Jackson Brittany's bow. I put her 0:16:38.040 --> 0:16:41.120 in like this little thing, you know, the circular thing 0:16:41.160 --> 0:16:42.560 where they can play with all the toys and like 0:16:42.600 --> 0:16:45.800 spin around. But she was so sure that she couldn't 0:16:45.800 --> 0:16:49.640 touch the bottom, and so Bo, being this sweet person 0:16:49.640 --> 0:16:51.720 that he is, he put books so that she could, 0:16:52.520 --> 0:16:52.800 you know. 0:16:52.840 --> 0:16:53.920 Touch like stuff. 0:16:54.080 --> 0:16:58.080 Yeah, boost, But when she was moving, she was her 0:16:58.160 --> 0:17:02.400 little toes were getting like paper cuts. And I pick 0:17:02.480 --> 0:17:04.040 her up and I have blood on my hand and 0:17:04.160 --> 0:17:07.199 I lost my fucking well did you know where it 0:17:07.240 --> 0:17:08.880 was from? At first? When I looked at her foot, 0:17:08.880 --> 0:17:09.919 I put two and two together. 0:17:10.640 --> 0:17:13.600 But it's just the moment scarier. 0:17:13.920 --> 0:17:15.800 It's like, yes, she's gonna fall. Like the other day, 0:17:15.840 --> 0:17:18.480 I see her baby shirt go flying across the floor 0:17:18.520 --> 0:17:20.080 and I heard a thud, and I was like, clearly 0:17:20.119 --> 0:17:23.679 she fell. She bumped her lip on her teeth and 0:17:23.720 --> 0:17:26.359 she's bleeding, and it's like, okay, she's fine, but you 0:17:26.359 --> 0:17:28.879 don't worry about the little falls anymore. You worry about Okay, 0:17:29.400 --> 0:17:32.280 she can fall, but like if she falls down the stairs, 0:17:32.560 --> 0:17:35.440 not great. I'm not consider her to bump that gets scary. 0:17:35.600 --> 0:17:36.879 I don't even know how we got into that. 0:17:36.920 --> 0:17:39.119 I don't know, You're just going down the rabbit. 0:17:39.440 --> 0:17:42.480 Who I would trust my child with, I would just like. 0:17:43.240 --> 0:17:46.800 All the time. 0:17:49.040 --> 0:17:50.680 The other night, so I had like a little get 0:17:50.680 --> 0:17:55.080 together for my mom's birthday. Keep in mind, Kristen. Kristen 0:17:55.160 --> 0:17:58.400 sent a group text after Thanksgiving letting us know that 0:17:58.760 --> 0:18:02.919 Luke was sick and so my mom got the RONA, Okay, 0:18:03.600 --> 0:18:04.080 you said it. 0:18:04.400 --> 0:18:07.160 He had cod He's never had it before, and he 0:18:07.240 --> 0:18:08.720 was like, there's no I mean, this is like he 0:18:08.800 --> 0:18:12.240 has like an immune system that is like steel. And 0:18:12.280 --> 0:18:14.800 he's like, there's no way. And it was like a 0:18:14.840 --> 0:18:18.320 little scratchy throat and a lot of sneezing for two days. 0:18:18.640 --> 0:18:22.399 But my sister recently had it as well. In her 0:18:22.680 --> 0:18:25.359 symptoms for the second time, it was sneezing and I'm like, 0:18:25.720 --> 0:18:27.160 maybe you just need to take a test. 0:18:27.320 --> 0:18:27.760 Yeah. 0:18:27.800 --> 0:18:30.440 So he did, Yeah, and it was positive. 0:18:30.600 --> 0:18:33.440 He might be the last person I know that got it, 0:18:33.520 --> 0:18:35.679 because literally everyone I know got it. 0:18:35.840 --> 0:18:37.440 Yeah, totally he did. 0:18:37.600 --> 0:18:37.840 Yeah. 0:18:38.119 --> 0:18:40.880 So she tells me this and when we plan, well 0:18:40.920 --> 0:18:43.960 not we. When I put together my mom's little birthday 0:18:43.960 --> 0:18:47.040 get together, I didn't invite Kristen because I knew the 0:18:47.119 --> 0:18:50.320 vid was circling in her household. Right, So I get 0:18:50.320 --> 0:18:53.200 a text from her asking and then my heart hurt 0:18:53.200 --> 0:18:55.000 for you again because I was like, damn it. 0:18:55.440 --> 0:18:59.040 Now I know I'm staying off Instagram. All my friends 0:18:59.040 --> 0:19:00.080 are there, cele. 0:19:01.280 --> 0:19:02.879 Now I know, I just need to throw you in 0:19:02.920 --> 0:19:04.919 the text so you know you're invited, and then you 0:19:05.000 --> 0:19:06.600 get to decline on your own. 0:19:07.119 --> 0:19:08.720 I don't know what it is, yeah right, I don't 0:19:08.760 --> 0:19:11.879 know what it is. Maybe it's like the show the canceling, 0:19:12.000 --> 0:19:14.639 the something. I don't know that, like I've suddenly become 0:19:14.760 --> 0:19:18.720 this like why am I not included? Like you can 0:19:18.720 --> 0:19:20.960 get a manicure with other friends, but why am I 0:19:21.040 --> 0:19:22.520 not included in certain things? 0:19:22.640 --> 0:19:22.720 Oh? 0:19:22.760 --> 0:19:24.040 Because I don't have a baby. 0:19:24.520 --> 0:19:29.000 Like, Oh, but that gets too That's that's a specific 0:19:29.040 --> 0:19:31.840 thing that happens a lot, especially in like small hometowns, 0:19:32.119 --> 0:19:35.000 hometowns I'm seeing even with my sister. You get to 0:19:35.040 --> 0:19:37.600 an age, your friends start having babies, your friends start 0:19:37.600 --> 0:19:41.360 getting married. All of a sudden, your friends stop inviting 0:19:41.400 --> 0:19:43.679 you places if you don't have a partner, or if 0:19:43.720 --> 0:19:45.760 you don't have a baby and likely I get that, 0:19:46.000 --> 0:19:48.160 or if you're not married even, and she's like, what 0:19:48.280 --> 0:19:51.320 the hell I mean, I don't really hang out with 0:19:51.359 --> 0:19:51.920 a ton of people. 0:19:52.000 --> 0:19:54.280 So I'm not finding that problem right now. 0:19:54.320 --> 0:19:56.840 But it gets to that age where I think that's 0:19:56.880 --> 0:19:58.879 a very big concern that happens. 0:19:58.920 --> 0:20:02.159 It seems to happen a little more with women. 0:20:02.640 --> 0:20:05.800 Yeah, yeah, so that's interesting that does happen. 0:20:06.040 --> 0:20:08.800 I don't really care about now. I do care if 0:20:08.800 --> 0:20:11.040 I'm going with like a group of people who don't 0:20:11.080 --> 0:20:13.119 have kids and I have Ocean, and again, you know, 0:20:13.240 --> 0:20:16.639 I don't have her every single day. So for me, 0:20:16.880 --> 0:20:19.360 it's like I have to be very selective. If I'm 0:20:19.359 --> 0:20:22.320 going to go do something, it better be like something 0:20:22.400 --> 0:20:25.639 that's worth going. It has to be like a birthday 0:20:25.880 --> 0:20:28.639 or like you're having You're getting a cake at your 0:20:28.640 --> 0:20:31.920 AA meeting. Then I can leave my mom with Ocean 0:20:32.000 --> 0:20:34.439 for a few hours. Otherwise, like my kid is coming. 0:20:34.640 --> 0:20:36.640 Yeah you So I have to ask all the time. 0:20:36.440 --> 0:20:38.720 Correct, So I have to ask my friends who don't 0:20:38.760 --> 0:20:41.760 have kids, like is it cool if o comes, because 0:20:41.760 --> 0:20:43.800 it does change the dynamic of things, like I'm gonna 0:20:43.800 --> 0:20:45.080 be running around with dinner. 0:20:45.000 --> 0:20:46.960 Me because I'm like Jess, I don't hang out with that. 0:20:47.240 --> 0:20:50.640 People, do you feel though, But there's sometimes where especially 0:20:50.840 --> 0:20:53.199 visiting home, we're all to ask my friends to go 0:20:53.240 --> 0:20:55.320 out to dinner dinner, and if they say I'm gonna 0:20:55.320 --> 0:20:56.080 bring my baby and go. 0:20:56.240 --> 0:20:59.119 No, no, no, no, not tonight, does it change No? 0:20:59.359 --> 0:21:03.119 I don't, yeah, nor the But you're. 0:21:03.000 --> 0:21:07.119 Also extremely close with Brittany and her kid is with 0:21:07.359 --> 0:21:10.879 like they don't. I don't. They're like superheroes with Jackson Britany. 0:21:11.200 --> 0:21:15.000 They have not a one ounce of help just the 0:21:15.040 --> 0:21:15.520 two of them. 0:21:15.600 --> 0:21:16.800 Brittany's mom is not. 0:21:16.880 --> 0:21:18.320 She lives in Kentucky, Kentucky. 0:21:18.359 --> 0:21:20.119 You always forget that. I think everyone's mom. 0:21:20.280 --> 0:21:23.919 Only two people have ever babysat crews that are not Brittany, 0:21:24.160 --> 0:21:27.920 not family, And it was our manager Ryan a long 0:21:27.960 --> 0:21:30.640 time ago. Jackson Brittany had something they like absolutely had 0:21:30.680 --> 0:21:33.879 to go to. And Ryan has a daughter who's like, 0:21:34.400 --> 0:21:36.639 you know, like in elementary school now, and they were like, okay, 0:21:36.680 --> 0:21:39.000 we can do this for like two hours when Cruz 0:21:39.080 --> 0:21:43.359 was baby. And then maybe like a month ago I 0:21:43.400 --> 0:21:46.359 got to watch Cruise. You did, Yeah, how to go what? 0:21:47.200 --> 0:21:49.720 He literally locked himself in his baby jail with his 0:21:49.800 --> 0:21:53.040 ipadab like never came out baby jail what is baby 0:21:53.320 --> 0:21:56.240 the baby jail? Like it the gate, the plastic gate 0:21:56.320 --> 0:21:58.280 thing like the gray and white one that we all 0:21:57.960 --> 0:22:02.040 have toys, And yes I do. But literally, Jared lips 0:22:02.040 --> 0:22:04.639 Comb and I were like sitting there watching Dancing with 0:22:04.640 --> 0:22:07.480 the Stars. I'm like begging Cruise to be my friend, 0:22:07.480 --> 0:22:09.479 like begging him to play with me, and he is 0:22:10.119 --> 0:22:13.439 as interested as like a dead fly. He's just like 0:22:14.080 --> 0:22:16.919 he's like hey, He's like uh. He'll walk out just 0:22:16.960 --> 0:22:19.320 to be like I want water or I'd be like, 0:22:19.359 --> 0:22:21.240 do you want your bottle? You want this? You want 0:22:21.240 --> 0:22:24.040 a snack? Cool? And he would just take whatever I 0:22:24.080 --> 0:22:26.239 gave him and go right back into baby jail with 0:22:26.320 --> 0:22:29.920 his iPad in his blanky for like three hours. I'm 0:22:29.960 --> 0:22:31.560 like Cruise, like, do you want to play? 0:22:32.400 --> 0:22:36.399 Given his money as a kid to have Kristen Jonie 0:22:36.960 --> 0:22:38.400 and Jared lips. 0:22:38.200 --> 0:22:39.440 Be my babysitter. 0:22:39.560 --> 0:22:41.879 Yeah, now that's a fucking vibe. 0:22:41.880 --> 0:22:43.880 Cruise has no idea what he missed out on. 0:22:44.359 --> 0:22:47.199 No, but I had Brittany feel like every three seconds like, 0:22:47.320 --> 0:22:49.800 how's he doing? Is everything okay? I'm like Brittany, literally 0:22:49.840 --> 0:22:53.840 he will not play with me. He's doing great. He's 0:22:53.920 --> 0:22:57.600 so independent. Now Yeah, he just wants to watch his 0:22:57.640 --> 0:23:01.200 Mickey Mouse and like sip on his is like apple juice. 0:23:01.000 --> 0:23:03.960 Or No, you're a great aunt. Yeah, you're an amazing aunt. 0:23:04.160 --> 0:23:08.400 So Mary like this, Well, your mom mostly watches Ocean. 0:23:08.720 --> 0:23:10.920 Like when I went to Brittany and this is Brittany, 0:23:11.000 --> 0:23:13.760 I'm gonna be there for two three hours max, right, Okay. 0:23:14.000 --> 0:23:16.080 I walk in. She has three bottles of milk in 0:23:16.119 --> 0:23:19.879 the fridge, two giant things of the lemonade that she 0:23:19.960 --> 0:23:22.240 mixes his water with. Okay, and then all these bottles 0:23:22.280 --> 0:23:25.159 of water. She's like, this is all here. I'm like, Brittany, 0:23:25.200 --> 0:23:26.960 you really think he's gonna drink like two gallons of 0:23:27.000 --> 0:23:30.160 lemonade and three bottles in the next two hours while 0:23:30.160 --> 0:23:30.719 you're gone. 0:23:31.040 --> 0:23:33.320 I don't know, how about I because you've washed Ocean 0:23:33.359 --> 0:23:34.240 a few times. 0:23:34.520 --> 0:23:36.560 Yes, you are over prepared. 0:23:36.760 --> 0:23:39.680 Yeah that you're like you're like to me because I 0:23:40.040 --> 0:23:40.919 used to nanny full time. 0:23:40.960 --> 0:23:43.520 I used to babysit. You're like a majority of the mothers. 0:23:43.560 --> 0:23:47.680 You're not too like this because I've babysat for women 0:23:47.720 --> 0:23:50.399 who are like and five thirty, you're gonna do this 0:23:50.560 --> 0:23:51.480 five forty five? 0:23:51.720 --> 0:23:53.880 That's on this happen seven exactly six. 0:23:54.080 --> 0:23:57.119 Yeah, you're like her milk's in the fridge. She's just 0:23:57.160 --> 0:23:59.480 so easy though, And I'm like, do I heat it up? 0:23:59.520 --> 0:24:02.119 And You're like, you're fine, very very chill. 0:24:02.240 --> 0:24:02.640 You're chill. 0:24:02.680 --> 0:24:04.720 You're like her milk's and the freage. You're good. If 0:24:04.720 --> 0:24:06.479 I have a question, you know, I'm gonna call her. 0:24:06.520 --> 0:24:08.560 Text you if she starts punching you in your face, 0:24:08.600 --> 0:24:13.399 I mean she's tired. Yeah, I love this. This is 0:24:13.520 --> 0:24:16.520 we go on tangents on this podcast. But back to 0:24:17.080 --> 0:24:19.399 why you sometimes feel left out, and you were saying 0:24:19.600 --> 0:24:22.080 it could be because maybe you're not on the show anymore. 0:24:22.119 --> 0:24:26.320 Maybe that triggered you. Is that something that still triggers you? 0:24:26.359 --> 0:24:27.359 Can you watch the show? 0:24:28.960 --> 0:24:31.639 I don't know if I will this season. I feel 0:24:31.680 --> 0:24:35.920 like I can last year last season, I watched two episodes. 0:24:36.080 --> 0:24:38.320 One I watched with Katie. I went over Katie's how 0:24:38.400 --> 0:24:41.320 she was like dying my hair for me and was 0:24:41.359 --> 0:24:45.320 it the finale I think or something. And I watched 0:24:45.400 --> 0:24:48.239 like one other episode and that was it. I was like, 0:24:48.400 --> 0:24:51.480 I'm good, Like I want to watch to support my 0:24:51.640 --> 0:24:55.240 friends that are on it, but like I just it's fomo. 0:24:55.960 --> 0:24:58.320 You have fomo but then at the same time, it's 0:24:58.600 --> 0:25:00.720 kind of like a like back and fourth thing because 0:25:00.760 --> 0:25:02.520 at the same time when I did what I did 0:25:02.560 --> 0:25:05.520 see didn't feel like the show I was on, so 0:25:05.560 --> 0:25:07.280 then it didn't. It's completely different. 0:25:07.800 --> 0:25:11.760 It's a completely different show. Yeah, you know, you can't 0:25:11.880 --> 0:25:15.120 lose even though we're all friends, Like, let's just call 0:25:15.160 --> 0:25:19.680 it what it is. We lost like key fucking players, right, 0:25:19.800 --> 0:25:22.359 Like you brought something that will never be able to 0:25:22.400 --> 0:25:25.719 replace Jack's. We will never be able to replace all 0:25:25.800 --> 0:25:29.680 day winners, right, all all day yeah OG's from the job. 0:25:29.800 --> 0:25:32.960 Yeah right, So we did have to go into the show, 0:25:33.080 --> 0:25:37.600 and for me personally, I was like, I'm going to 0:25:37.720 --> 0:25:40.119 be grateful that we get a season nine, but I'm 0:25:40.119 --> 0:25:43.719 definitely not banking that we will continue. Like this is 0:25:43.760 --> 0:25:48.000 going to be most likely a farewell because the show 0:25:48.119 --> 0:25:50.679 just looks different, and I don't know that the people 0:25:50.720 --> 0:25:54.160 that are left if they're able to carry a fucking show, 0:25:54.680 --> 0:25:56.960 you know, because a lot of people that are left 0:25:57.280 --> 0:26:00.000 they want a kumbay yah to break it to you. 0:26:00.240 --> 0:26:02.679 These folks don't want to watch you Kumbai. Yeah, I know, 0:26:02.720 --> 0:26:05.719 because I am an avid reality TV watcher and the 0:26:05.760 --> 0:26:08.760 second I see someone who is Switzerland. I'm like, bitch, 0:26:08.760 --> 0:26:09.919 you're boring. You need to be right. 0:26:10.080 --> 0:26:12.440 I don't know, and I don't care. Don't fly right. 0:26:13.080 --> 0:26:14.560 It's exactly it just doesn't. 0:26:14.680 --> 0:26:18.600 So you won't watch this season because you feel triggered 0:26:18.600 --> 0:26:19.080 by it. 0:26:19.119 --> 0:26:23.040 A little bit? Yeah, I mean I feel like I'll 0:26:23.080 --> 0:26:26.119 know from like either you or Katie or someone like 0:26:26.600 --> 0:26:29.840 or even Sina, like, oh, I should watch that episode, 0:26:29.960 --> 0:26:32.720 you know, like Sena's wedding. I was there, but I 0:26:32.800 --> 0:26:35.560 missed a lot of it. So I'm like, I'd like 0:26:35.600 --> 0:26:37.400 to see like some of the stuff that I missed, 0:26:37.480 --> 0:26:41.040 or just certain moments I'll probably look at. But to 0:26:41.160 --> 0:26:44.320 like sit there and watch as a whole season, Hell no, 0:26:44.840 --> 0:26:46.479 I couldn't do it, you know what. 0:26:47.359 --> 0:26:54.120 I so appreciate your honesty. It's so refreshing to have 0:26:54.560 --> 0:26:59.280 someone say like, I'm bummed, it hurts I can't fight watch. 0:26:59.680 --> 0:27:02.879 Yeah. No, I'm not mad about it. I'm not like 0:27:03.000 --> 0:27:06.840 it's not all this anger anymore. And I'm not like, oh, 0:27:06.920 --> 0:27:10.240 fuck that show I got canceled. Fuck you know no, 0:27:10.400 --> 0:27:12.960 I'm like, I hope my friends still have a job 0:27:13.000 --> 0:27:15.440 next year. I hope that they can find a way 0:27:15.480 --> 0:27:18.400 to shift this. I mean obviously. What I've really hope 0:27:18.400 --> 0:27:20.280 is that vandr Pupkints canceled, we all have a brand 0:27:20.280 --> 0:27:22.399 new show together one day and we go back to 0:27:22.440 --> 0:27:27.679 being one big, happy family that fights butsfunctional family for 0:27:27.760 --> 0:27:30.320 the time being. I want you guys to all thrive 0:27:30.320 --> 0:27:33.840 and succeed and push your brands and everything that you're 0:27:34.040 --> 0:27:36.879 working on and using the show as a platform, because 0:27:36.920 --> 0:27:38.720 that's what this shit is all about. We didn't do 0:27:38.800 --> 0:27:41.560 this for shits and giggles. You know, you don't do 0:27:41.600 --> 0:27:46.920 that show because it's a great fucking time, you know, like, yeah, 0:27:46.920 --> 0:27:49.200 you get to hang out with your friends while filming 0:27:49.240 --> 0:27:51.960 and entertaining people, because that's what we're all really good at. 0:27:52.000 --> 0:27:52.720 At the end of the day. 0:27:52.720 --> 0:27:54.600 Well, we none of us moved out to LA to 0:27:54.600 --> 0:27:55.840 be on a reality TV show. 0:27:55.880 --> 0:27:56.280 We did not. 0:27:56.680 --> 0:27:59.840 But off of that, would you are you still open 0:27:59.880 --> 0:28:02.520 to to reality TV if there was an Okay. 0:28:02.400 --> 0:28:03.200 Yeah, definitely. 0:28:03.280 --> 0:28:05.879 There will be a point in time where we're all 0:28:06.480 --> 0:28:10.359 old and watching our grandkids run around, or you know, 0:28:11.160 --> 0:28:15.280 have twelve dogs in our fabulous homes and you're sipping martinis. 0:28:15.320 --> 0:28:18.080 And I don't think I'll be sipping martini at that 0:28:18.359 --> 0:28:22.840 point in time. But maybe some perier where we do 0:28:22.920 --> 0:28:24.960 get to look back and we're gonna forget about all 0:28:24.960 --> 0:28:25.720 the other shit and go. 0:28:26.520 --> 0:28:29.159 We were on fucking TV. Yeah, what a time in 0:28:29.200 --> 0:28:33.280 our lives and we have this like video memory book. 0:28:33.720 --> 0:28:36.160 Yes, not always one that I want to. 0:28:36.040 --> 0:28:41.680 Know, minus all the falls, the drunk and crying, shitty moments, 0:28:42.200 --> 0:28:43.160 all pushing me. 0:28:43.680 --> 0:28:46.600 What a weird time in my life? You know that's 0:28:46.680 --> 0:28:50.680 what That fucking drunk What was that? 0:28:51.120 --> 0:28:54.000 No, it's just like so not you. It was like 0:28:54.080 --> 0:28:58.400 this hard. It was a hard outer cover to protect 0:28:58.600 --> 0:29:00.800 the sweet pea that lives within. 0:29:01.160 --> 0:29:03.200 I've never been in a physical fight. That's why when 0:29:03.200 --> 0:29:04.960 I pushed her, I was like did I just don't 0:29:05.000 --> 0:29:07.200 and I ran, I ran, I was like, I've got 0:29:07.240 --> 0:29:12.960 to get out of here before well she you not hidden? 0:29:13.280 --> 0:29:14.560 Because I don't know. 0:29:15.040 --> 0:29:16.000 I need to rewatch. 0:29:16.040 --> 0:29:17.400 What is this? What season? 0:29:17.440 --> 0:29:18.000 Did you push her? 0:29:18.160 --> 0:29:18.480 Second? 0:29:18.560 --> 0:29:21.600 For the very last episode, ka. 0:29:21.680 --> 0:29:24.600 And Tom's engaged. Right after Katie and Tom's engagement. 0:29:24.280 --> 0:29:27.320 They get engaged Jessica and we're at Lisa Vannerbump's house 0:29:27.400 --> 0:29:31.360 with Tom and Katie's family like grandparents, and Kristen and 0:29:31.400 --> 0:29:34.920 Stossy are giving a very heartfelt speech to that friends, 0:29:35.360 --> 0:29:39.520 they doesn't matter. Harvelt speech to their two friends who 0:29:39.560 --> 0:29:45.440 are now engaged who they've known forever. And my drunk ass, us, 0:29:45.840 --> 0:29:50.200 my drunk ass, can you wrap it up? What the 0:29:50.240 --> 0:29:54.560 fuck are you talking about? I've watched of everybody? 0:29:54.680 --> 0:29:55.800 Can you wrap it up? 0:29:56.760 --> 0:29:58.600 With? Like the finger curling in the air? 0:29:59.320 --> 0:30:04.240 And then because me again, I'm like, and then cameras 0:30:04.480 --> 0:30:08.400 shut down for us to now go film at sir. 0:30:09.040 --> 0:30:10.840 And I see a black car and I'm broke as 0:30:10.840 --> 0:30:13.480 a motherfucker, right. I see a black car roll up 0:30:14.120 --> 0:30:16.680 and I was like, I'm getting in it. This car 0:30:16.720 --> 0:30:19.000 has taking me to sir. And the guy says, are 0:30:19.000 --> 0:30:21.760 you Chris and Dody? And I go, yep, I get in. 0:30:21.800 --> 0:30:26.640 This bitch flies around. No, it was mortified you made 0:30:26.640 --> 0:30:28.040 me get out, and I was like, all right, I 0:30:28.080 --> 0:30:31.080 don't remember all We were all having a pretty fun 0:30:31.160 --> 0:30:33.040 time at vander Pump's house, but it was just like 0:30:33.440 --> 0:30:36.920 those moments. I know that we've I obviously have not 0:30:36.920 --> 0:30:39.920 been through what you've been through, but I hope that 0:30:40.040 --> 0:30:43.120 at some point in time we can look back. Because 0:30:43.160 --> 0:30:45.719 I can't even watch old episodes like I cringe and 0:30:45.760 --> 0:30:47.960 I feel very disgusted. 0:30:47.640 --> 0:30:50.320 Really do you watch old episodes? 0:30:50.880 --> 0:30:54.480 No, okay, no, no, I'll watch og of everyone else, 0:30:54.600 --> 0:30:57.160 I'll watch I'll watch old vander Pump episodes before I 0:30:57.200 --> 0:30:59.320 was on. I started that during COVID and I'm like, 0:30:59.360 --> 0:31:03.520 this show is gold, but to watch myself. No, we're 0:31:03.560 --> 0:31:04.360 gonna need a lot of. 0:31:04.400 --> 0:31:08.800 Years, a messy, messy, messy, messy messy. 0:31:08.920 --> 0:31:11.680 You know what's so strange is people like Dody and I. 0:31:11.760 --> 0:31:15.120 There's no in between. You've got the rider dies or 0:31:15.120 --> 0:31:16.920 people who want to light us on five. Yeah. 0:31:17.640 --> 0:31:21.920 It's no like she stays just nice. She's cool, like 0:31:21.960 --> 0:31:24.280 not at all. It's it's yeah. I kind of like 0:31:24.360 --> 0:31:26.760 that though, I do too, because for what I am. 0:31:26.840 --> 0:31:29.840 Yeah, and I'm not great, which is why we make 0:31:29.880 --> 0:31:33.000 great reality TV people, because you can't be great. You 0:31:33.040 --> 0:31:35.840 got to be black or white. You know, you got 0:31:35.840 --> 0:31:40.040 to have an opinion, which when you guys were no 0:31:40.120 --> 0:31:41.920 longer on the show, I felt like I had to 0:31:41.920 --> 0:31:44.719 put all your guys's hats on. I was like, I 0:31:44.720 --> 0:31:47.640 gotta bring Kristen Dody, I gotta pay homage to Jack's 0:31:47.640 --> 0:31:50.120 and be the bone collector and carrier, you know. 0:31:50.480 --> 0:31:52.840 And you really did kind of take the role of 0:31:52.920 --> 0:31:56.000 the me of like, wait, so you guys are fighting 0:31:56.080 --> 0:31:58.640 about what, let me insert myself to like have the 0:31:58.800 --> 0:32:01.760 true conversation because clearly you're not having that. 0:32:01.640 --> 0:32:04.760 Conversation like a media that's how not me. 0:32:04.920 --> 0:32:08.360 Now, it was like Tom and Katy are fighting, and 0:32:08.400 --> 0:32:10.360 Tom Katy don't want to talk about why they're fighting. 0:32:10.400 --> 0:32:12.880 So Kristen is going to insert herself in the middle 0:32:12.920 --> 0:32:16.040 of their marriage or relationship and just iron out all 0:32:16.080 --> 0:32:17.360 the wrinkles. 0:32:16.920 --> 0:32:19.280 Right because even though like we all want to coom 0:32:19.320 --> 0:32:21.800 buy a, this is a fucking TV show, so let's 0:32:21.840 --> 0:32:22.400 get it popp in. 0:32:22.600 --> 0:32:26.200 And from a from an outsider looking in, there is 0:32:26.320 --> 0:32:29.120 something very special and was something very special. It still 0:32:29.200 --> 0:32:34.320 is about that group of people about all of you sees. 0:32:34.640 --> 0:32:36.840 I'd say it was I guess season eight, season seven. 0:32:37.360 --> 0:32:38.520 That's a special group. 0:32:38.560 --> 0:32:42.160 There's like, you know, the reality TV producers, there's always 0:32:42.200 --> 0:32:44.880 like they're like, we need the magic, we need this, 0:32:45.040 --> 0:32:47.440 and that's what you might have. I mean, if I 0:32:47.720 --> 0:32:50.760 was a you know, genius reality TV producer, I would 0:32:50.760 --> 0:32:52.480 take that same group and go make something else, like 0:32:52.480 --> 0:32:55.520 you said, because there's something magic about that about your 0:32:55.560 --> 0:33:01.840 st Yeah. 0:32:59.120 --> 0:33:01.240 So now you're in this new we'll call it new 0:33:01.280 --> 0:33:02.560 season of life and you. 0:33:02.560 --> 0:33:05.680 Have a Luke? What is a luke? A luke? I 0:33:05.720 --> 0:33:08.680 would like a luke? Yeah, it. Luke's great. You've met him, 0:33:08.840 --> 0:33:12.240 You've spent time with him. He's great with ocean Luke. 0:33:12.640 --> 0:33:14.320 You know, it just sort of fell into my lap 0:33:14.360 --> 0:33:17.240 after my last breakup. We I talked about this on 0:33:17.280 --> 0:33:19.760 my first episode of my podcast, like we met or 0:33:19.800 --> 0:33:24.360 we became friends. At my girlfriend's wedding, we walked down 0:33:24.400 --> 0:33:26.520 the aisle together as like bridesmaid groomsman. 0:33:27.000 --> 0:33:28.720 Oh wow, yeah, it's like a movie. 0:33:29.040 --> 0:33:32.000 Yeah. Well, I basically once I was able to get 0:33:32.040 --> 0:33:34.360 off my phone and stop worrying about life in Los 0:33:34.400 --> 0:33:38.280 Angeles over that weekend in Colorado, but my phone was 0:33:38.320 --> 0:33:39.960 actually taken away from me, which is the best thing 0:33:40.000 --> 0:33:40.560 that could have happened. 0:33:40.560 --> 0:33:41.400 Who took your phone from you? 0:33:41.560 --> 0:33:43.720 Two of my friends and they're like you'll never know 0:33:43.760 --> 0:33:45.400 who has it but one of us, And I'm like, 0:33:45.440 --> 0:33:47.080 you know, what, what do I need it for? Like 0:33:47.280 --> 0:33:49.480 if there's an emergency, my mom knows who to call, 0:33:49.600 --> 0:33:52.240 Like that's all that matters right now. And then I 0:33:52.280 --> 0:33:56.160 made Luke essentially like my handler for the weekend, and like, 0:33:56.240 --> 0:33:59.080 so you're my groomsman, and you are going to just 0:33:59.160 --> 0:34:02.080 make sure that I have my ship together because you're kind, 0:34:02.360 --> 0:34:05.440 don't Yeah, And then we had sex behind a tent 0:34:05.800 --> 0:34:06.960 and it was great at the wedding. 0:34:07.000 --> 0:34:07.800 At the wedding. 0:34:09.160 --> 0:34:13.680 On the ranch, the first time, she says she. 0:34:15.160 --> 0:34:18.759 Standing up you like pushed up against like a wall 0:34:18.840 --> 0:34:19.200 or something. 0:34:19.280 --> 0:34:20.440 It was like behind a tent. 0:34:22.920 --> 0:34:26.920 So were you like bent over yeah, yeehaw, dog y style. 0:34:27.400 --> 0:34:30.200 Well, we were like in our outfits. Like he was like, oh, 0:34:30.239 --> 0:34:33.800 do you want to come grab the dogs? I'm super 0:34:33.840 --> 0:34:36.400 like emotional, like where are the dogs at the wedding? 0:34:36.719 --> 0:34:38.600 Parts over? The kids are gone? Can we bring the 0:34:38.600 --> 0:34:41.880 dogs to the reception? Like you know, six dogs on 0:34:41.920 --> 0:34:44.040 the ranch. So he's like, okay, let's go get the dogs. 0:34:44.520 --> 0:34:47.440 And then Jill there kissed me. Jill was there killed 0:34:47.440 --> 0:34:51.160 the German shepherd and then he kissed me and he said, 0:34:51.320 --> 0:34:53.080 you know, he's like I didn't think he would escalate 0:34:53.120 --> 0:34:54.759 that quickly. I was like, coud, you don't know me 0:34:54.800 --> 0:34:55.320 that well. 0:34:55.640 --> 0:34:58.520 Can you do the splits? Can I what did I 0:34:58.760 --> 0:35:02.320 know for a Can she do the splits? Split anyone 0:35:02.560 --> 0:35:05.560 anyone who can do splits? I know you're a bag 0:35:05.560 --> 0:35:06.239 of fun in bed. 0:35:07.600 --> 0:35:10.960 Yeah, I was a cheerleader and I'm still flexible. I'm 0:35:10.960 --> 0:35:14.280 like Tom Schwartz, but like a little like Tom Schwartz's body, 0:35:14.280 --> 0:35:16.320 but just like I move a lot more. You know 0:35:16.360 --> 0:35:16.839 what I mean? 0:35:17.480 --> 0:35:19.120 Is Tom Schwartz flexible? 0:35:19.360 --> 0:35:20.040 Is this what? 0:35:20.120 --> 0:35:22.760 Able? Long and lanky? 0:35:23.120 --> 0:35:25.480 Like the model bodies? That's what I call it. The 0:35:25.560 --> 0:35:27.080 long lanky. It's like my sister. 0:35:27.160 --> 0:35:29.279 It's like not really in control of it with like 0:35:29.320 --> 0:35:30.280 not great posture. 0:35:31.120 --> 0:35:34.359 Yeah, but the way your body is dody, like when 0:35:34.400 --> 0:35:36.399 you have like a little tank top on without a bra. 0:35:36.600 --> 0:35:40.200 Like the way your boobs sit, it's like very sexy. 0:35:40.480 --> 0:35:41.840 I hope it stays that way. 0:35:41.960 --> 0:35:42.200 You know. 0:35:42.239 --> 0:35:45.960 Like if I start curving my shoulders, I have shoulder 0:35:45.960 --> 0:35:47.560 blades that look like wings. 0:35:47.640 --> 0:35:48.200 Yeah they do. 0:35:48.480 --> 0:35:53.040 I love it, So I have to like push back 0:35:53.160 --> 0:35:56.720 or else I'm just gonna look kind of like gollum. 0:35:57.280 --> 0:36:01.120 I think it's so chic and like cute. It. I 0:36:01.160 --> 0:36:01.759 really like it. 0:36:02.000 --> 0:36:03.399 But you also liked my alf ear. 0:36:03.840 --> 0:36:06.239 That is true, And I know I I was so 0:36:06.360 --> 0:36:07.680 mad at her and she was going to pin her 0:36:07.719 --> 0:36:09.400 ears and you were and I'm like, don't do it. 0:36:09.480 --> 0:36:10.160 I love your ears. 0:36:10.200 --> 0:36:10.919 What do you think now? 0:36:11.520 --> 0:36:13.359 I mean, she's hot always, so I. 0:36:13.360 --> 0:36:14.440 Love you so much. 0:36:14.880 --> 0:36:18.359 Does Luke co host the podcast? Yeah, here's one thing. 0:36:18.400 --> 0:36:21.240 So your podcast, what's your podcast? 0:36:21.239 --> 0:36:25.520 All about sex and love and relationships and dating and 0:36:25.600 --> 0:36:29.719 just a really unfiltered, really raw like for me, it was, 0:36:29.920 --> 0:36:32.959 It's my favorite thing to talk about. Obviously, I wrote 0:36:33.000 --> 0:36:35.600 my book He's Making You Crazy, And I don't want 0:36:35.600 --> 0:36:39.440 to be pigeonholed sort of into that, oh hack your 0:36:39.480 --> 0:36:43.440 boyfriend's phone like I'm thirty nine now, like I've grown. However, 0:36:43.560 --> 0:36:47.160 I still am just so fascinated by the psychology behind 0:36:47.239 --> 0:36:50.680 why people make the decisions that they make, the choices 0:36:50.719 --> 0:36:53.880 that they make in their relationships. How open are people 0:36:54.000 --> 0:36:56.400 to talking about sex and the people that aren't, Because 0:36:56.440 --> 0:36:59.520 I firmly stand by if you can't talk about sex, 0:36:59.520 --> 0:37:01.919 you shouldn't having it. You should And I don't mean 0:37:01.960 --> 0:37:04.359 public wow, I don't mean you have to like air 0:37:04.440 --> 0:37:07.520 your laundry to everybody. But I just think if you 0:37:07.560 --> 0:37:11.480 can't communicate with your partner, like what you want, what 0:37:11.520 --> 0:37:14.120 you like, what you don't like, why why can't you 0:37:14.200 --> 0:37:16.240 just be honest about all that? It's such an intimate 0:37:16.320 --> 0:37:19.960 act to be, you know, intimate and. 0:37:20.239 --> 0:37:22.799 Have you always felt that way or is it has 0:37:22.800 --> 0:37:24.719 it been as you've gotten older, Because. 0:37:24.520 --> 0:37:27.320 As I've gotten older, for sure, I've always been pretty 0:37:27.440 --> 0:37:29.279 open about it, but just not like. 0:37:29.480 --> 0:37:33.080 Did you think did you think about sex as an 0:37:33.120 --> 0:37:35.240 intimate moment, because as I've gotten older. 0:37:35.320 --> 0:37:37.200 When I was younger, I did that. No, it was 0:37:37.320 --> 0:37:40.719 like it was for fun, yeah, right, one night's stand. 0:37:40.800 --> 0:37:44.480 Nobody now even now though, like when I especially like 0:37:44.600 --> 0:37:47.640 after my last relationship and being single, and like it 0:37:47.719 --> 0:37:51.120 is fine for me to sleep with people on a 0:37:51.120 --> 0:37:53.080 first date. I can do whatever the hell I want to. 0:37:53.400 --> 0:37:55.879 Does it make me a slut? It doesn't? Like, why 0:37:55.880 --> 0:37:57.560 are dudes allowed to do it and we're not. It's 0:37:57.600 --> 0:38:00.880 like that hympathy or slutshaming, which, by the way, well 0:38:01.440 --> 0:38:03.400 that's my body. And if I want to do it, 0:38:03.440 --> 0:38:05.040 then I will, and if I don't want too, then 0:38:05.080 --> 0:38:05.600 I don't. 0:38:05.760 --> 0:38:08.280 I love that you have a podcast that is talking 0:38:08.320 --> 0:38:11.920 about that, because as much as we sit here and go, 0:38:12.080 --> 0:38:15.440 women have moved leaps and bounds and like we can 0:38:15.480 --> 0:38:16.120 do what men do. 0:38:16.239 --> 0:38:16.800 No we can't. 0:38:17.080 --> 0:38:19.600 Right, I go out and I talk about sex and 0:38:19.719 --> 0:38:21.960 what would your daughter think? What would my daughter think 0:38:22.000 --> 0:38:24.680 about me having consensual sex? And me talking about it. 0:38:24.920 --> 0:38:27.319 Oh my god, I hope she'd feel empowered. That's what 0:38:27.320 --> 0:38:27.879 I hope she would. 0:38:27.920 --> 0:38:31.600 Yeah, exactly, like just being open and honest and vulnerable. 0:38:32.480 --> 0:38:34.920 And I just think it's so fucking interesting and like 0:38:35.400 --> 0:38:39.520 having Luke on respect because Luke, it was just when 0:38:39.520 --> 0:38:42.239 we became friends and he obviously doesn't live in California. 0:38:42.320 --> 0:38:45.040 We were We just started talking on the phone for 0:38:45.120 --> 0:38:48.319 like hours and hours and hours a day, and I 0:38:48.360 --> 0:38:51.160 don't even know the moment that it happened where we 0:38:51.160 --> 0:38:54.520 were talking about our own relationships, but like his past 0:38:54.560 --> 0:38:59.080 relationships and in full fucking detail and breaking down the 0:38:59.080 --> 0:39:02.360 psychology of everything, and like why he was emotionally unavailable 0:39:02.360 --> 0:39:03.160 when he was younger. 0:39:03.680 --> 0:39:05.160 Why how old is he? 0:39:05.160 --> 0:39:08.640 He's thirty one, he's still young, but like he's really 0:39:08.680 --> 0:39:10.560 able to say, like, oh, yeah, I had this one 0:39:10.600 --> 0:39:14.280 girlfriend who's on and off for four years, and essentially 0:39:14.320 --> 0:39:16.520 he's like at times, I was just kind of using her. 0:39:16.560 --> 0:39:18.400 I knew she was in love with me, but she 0:39:18.520 --> 0:39:21.080 helped me with my business, she helped me watch my dogs. 0:39:21.320 --> 0:39:23.560 She's really hot. We had great sex, and I basically 0:39:23.640 --> 0:39:26.680 used her. And for a man to like admit that 0:39:27.239 --> 0:39:29.839 he's not proud of it, but just yeah, that's what 0:39:29.880 --> 0:39:32.640 I did, and now I'm I'm aware of that, and 0:39:32.640 --> 0:39:35.319 I wouldn't treat someone like that again because I'm like, 0:39:35.360 --> 0:39:38.160 you can't call your ex crazy when that's what you 0:39:38.200 --> 0:39:40.759 were doing, not saying she's not crazy. I don't know 0:39:40.760 --> 0:39:42.279 the girl, I don't know any of these people, but 0:39:42.880 --> 0:39:45.600 you have to take into consideration the position you were 0:39:45.640 --> 0:39:49.000 putting her in totally. So that's why I'm like, you 0:39:49.000 --> 0:39:52.040 know what, I really need you on this podcast because 0:39:52.080 --> 0:39:55.160 I want to like paint these scenarios that we've gone 0:39:55.200 --> 0:39:58.480 through separately together or other people have been through, and 0:39:58.520 --> 0:40:02.080 then start bouncing off of each other because we share 0:40:02.400 --> 0:40:05.000 very similar points of view and like morals and ethics, 0:40:05.040 --> 0:40:07.480 but we have very different opinions about. 0:40:07.320 --> 0:40:09.839 Or you're you're a woman, he's a man. Yeah, you're 0:40:09.880 --> 0:40:12.600 going to have completely and he may be able to 0:40:12.760 --> 0:40:17.680 shed light correct because I will never pretend like we 0:40:17.800 --> 0:40:21.480 had Mike Johnson on the podcast and he's a sex coach. 0:40:21.520 --> 0:40:24.120 He was on the Bachelorette, but I was telling him 0:40:24.120 --> 0:40:27.879 what I crave in a relationship is transparency and consistency. 0:40:28.239 --> 0:40:30.480 So if you are going to be in and out, 0:40:30.640 --> 0:40:34.680 be in and out consistently. Okay, don't expect anything from me, 0:40:34.760 --> 0:40:37.640 because I've now created the boundary. You have been transparent 0:40:37.760 --> 0:40:39.520 letting me know you're going to pop in and out, 0:40:39.520 --> 0:40:42.200 and we're just fucking guess what. Great, I know what 0:40:42.239 --> 0:40:45.120 to expect exactly. But when you come into my space 0:40:45.400 --> 0:40:47.719 and you start trying to win over my heart and 0:40:47.800 --> 0:40:50.280 have me let my guard down, and then you expect 0:40:50.320 --> 0:40:52.680 me to flip the switch when you're ready to just 0:40:52.719 --> 0:40:54.839 have it be a fuck, I can't go there. 0:40:54.960 --> 0:40:57.879 No, hell no. It's like Luke and I've talked about 0:40:57.880 --> 0:41:02.680 the difference between ghosting or like leaving someone unread is 0:41:02.719 --> 0:41:05.520 what he calls it. If it's like I talked about 0:41:05.520 --> 0:41:07.520 this guy that I dated or not dated, but it 0:41:07.680 --> 0:41:09.640 like I was hooking up with or tried to hook 0:41:09.719 --> 0:41:11.319 up with whatever, and I'm like yeah, and then this 0:41:11.400 --> 0:41:13.799 guy was like all up my ass for like this 0:41:13.960 --> 0:41:16.480 many days and then flaked on me when we were 0:41:16.480 --> 0:41:19.160 supposed to hang out and then just like stop texting 0:41:19.200 --> 0:41:21.080 me back. And Luke's like, no, that's not really ghosting, though, 0:41:21.120 --> 0:41:23.000 it's like leaving you on red. And now I'm learning 0:41:23.040 --> 0:41:24.960 about this thing called bread crumbing, which is kind of 0:41:24.960 --> 0:41:27.560 what you're talking about. Okay, what is that where it's 0:41:27.600 --> 0:41:29.440 like I'm going to leave you these little crumbs, this 0:41:29.480 --> 0:41:32.040 little trail. I'm gonna give you everything you want and 0:41:32.040 --> 0:41:34.319 then I'm gonna flip this. Yeah, it's just like, oh 0:41:34.400 --> 0:41:37.360 now I'm not around anymore. Like, no, that doesn't fucking 0:41:37.400 --> 0:41:39.640 work for me. Just call a spade a spade, say 0:41:39.680 --> 0:41:41.160 it is what it is. If you just want to 0:41:41.160 --> 0:41:44.400 sleep together or like hang out casually, then just say that. 0:41:45.080 --> 0:41:47.480 I'm like, I'm thirty nine fucking years old. 0:41:47.719 --> 0:41:50.960 Yeah, I know exactly what you mean. And back in 0:41:51.000 --> 0:41:53.239 the day, I remember my friends would come to me, 0:41:53.440 --> 0:41:56.839 or I would not so much because that movie. He's 0:41:56.920 --> 0:41:59.759 just not that into you really resonating with me. So 0:42:00.160 --> 0:42:02.719 it back in the day, my friends would come to 0:42:02.760 --> 0:42:05.120 me and they'd say, he's not texting me back. I 0:42:05.120 --> 0:42:07.640 don't understand. And I was like, that's he doesn't need 0:42:07.719 --> 0:42:09.719 to tell you he's not interested. He is telling you 0:42:09.760 --> 0:42:14.520 he's not interested. But as I get older, I don't 0:42:14.520 --> 0:42:18.080 have time for that. You can't reel me in and 0:42:18.160 --> 0:42:22.360 then ghost because I'm a grown up and a mother 0:42:22.520 --> 0:42:25.160 and I need this thing called closure because I'm a 0:42:25.200 --> 0:42:28.800 communicator and I find that everything wrong in the world 0:42:28.880 --> 0:42:34.520 is because there's no community communication. There's no communication, and 0:42:34.560 --> 0:42:37.759 there's also no like we may not agree, but like 0:42:37.800 --> 0:42:42.200 we gotta respect. I respect that you're not interested anymore, right, 0:42:42.239 --> 0:42:43.840 but just like lay it out for me. 0:42:44.040 --> 0:42:46.480 Yeah, just be fucking honest and let's just move on 0:42:46.800 --> 0:42:49.560 and stop wasting precious time that we have on this 0:42:49.600 --> 0:42:50.839 goddamn earth. 0:42:50.600 --> 0:42:52.200 Right, because then I'm sitting here and I'm making up 0:42:52.239 --> 0:42:52.880 a fucking. 0:42:52.600 --> 0:42:55.720 Story in my head that's the story of my life. 0:42:55.800 --> 0:42:57.759 And I say it went all the time, because when 0:42:57.800 --> 0:43:03.520 you don't have answers to questions that you were asking bluntly, honestly, truly, vulnerably, 0:43:04.560 --> 0:43:06.560 you have no choice but to start making up these 0:43:06.600 --> 0:43:09.120 scenarios in your head that are probably so far from 0:43:09.160 --> 0:43:12.640 the truth totally. And then that's viral. And that's based 0:43:12.680 --> 0:43:15.160 on everything that you've gone through with your past people 0:43:15.880 --> 0:43:17.600 when you grew up like you, that is what you 0:43:17.600 --> 0:43:22.720 are conditioned to believe at this point. So guys, stop 0:43:22.760 --> 0:43:25.440 fucking around, Just be honest, Just be honest. 0:43:25.520 --> 0:43:29.440 And I would almost rather be alone forever then have 0:43:29.520 --> 0:43:34.960 someone come into my world who breadcrumbs me or is dishonoring. 0:43:34.239 --> 0:43:35.920 This tug of war with yours. 0:43:36.600 --> 0:43:38.800 Leave me alone, Like, I'm good on my own, dude, 0:43:38.800 --> 0:43:40.760 I don't need you to come in and give me anything. 0:43:40.800 --> 0:43:43.520 In fact, you're just like adding a lot of chaos 0:43:43.800 --> 0:43:44.200 into my. 0:43:44.200 --> 0:43:47.040 Life, chaos and stress and just unneeded bullshit. Like the 0:43:47.080 --> 0:43:50.520 way to my vagina is through my heart. Be a 0:43:50.560 --> 0:43:54.040 good dude, and like you're gonna get laid. Just be 0:43:54.080 --> 0:43:54.560 a good dude. 0:43:54.760 --> 0:43:59.000 Yeah, because I'm in the season. Vagina is my heart. Yeah, 0:43:59.200 --> 0:44:02.160 I ain't passing this good good around and just anybody. 0:44:02.800 --> 0:44:05.200 All right, there may be a new season where that 0:44:05.400 --> 0:44:07.200 is offered, but right now. 0:44:07.560 --> 0:44:09.600 Right, but that's but that's up to you. 0:44:09.960 --> 0:44:13.440 Yes, do you still consider yourself single? Or like, what 0:44:13.440 --> 0:44:15.520 what is happening with your co host? Is he just 0:44:15.560 --> 0:44:16.160 a co host? 0:44:16.239 --> 0:44:21.840 We haven't are I haven't talked about this in my 0:44:21.920 --> 0:44:23.239 Vagina co hosting. 0:44:23.000 --> 0:44:25.640 Okay, they're also we're all okay, so you're in a 0:44:25.680 --> 0:44:27.480 co hosting relationship. 0:44:27.000 --> 0:44:29.959 Yeah, and we haven't, Like I haven't. We literally haven't 0:44:29.960 --> 0:44:31.759 talked about this on the podcast yet. We've talked about 0:44:31.760 --> 0:44:37.200 sleeping together and all of that, but but relationship, yeah, 0:44:37.200 --> 0:44:40.680 we haven't. We have there's no label. But he's like 0:44:40.800 --> 0:44:41.680 okay with that? 0:44:42.239 --> 0:44:43.200 Are you okay with that too? 0:44:43.440 --> 0:44:47.120 It's my choice, okay, but like we're dating, Yeah. 0:44:46.800 --> 0:44:49.759 I love that. So you haven't even ventured into conversations 0:44:49.760 --> 0:44:51.640 about you don't live here, what's the game? 0:44:51.840 --> 0:44:54.040 No, But he just it's like he knows, I'm not 0:44:54.040 --> 0:44:55.759 sleeping with anyone else. I'm not going on dates with 0:44:55.760 --> 0:44:57.879 anyone else. So essentially I think it is what it is. 0:44:57.960 --> 0:45:02.440 But but he's fine with the fact that I haven't 0:45:02.480 --> 0:45:05.200 been quite ready to say, like I'm checking the box. 0:45:05.239 --> 0:45:07.600 You're my boyfriend like this. 0:45:07.800 --> 0:45:10.600 It's so strange because you talking about it, you're very 0:45:10.680 --> 0:45:13.839 much from an outside perspective in a relationship. But just 0:45:14.000 --> 0:45:18.560 that little conversation about the label really does change everything. 0:45:18.760 --> 0:45:23.080 It does for me because like the last relationship I 0:45:23.120 --> 0:45:25.680 was in, the last two relationships I was in, I 0:45:25.800 --> 0:45:28.760 was like, this is my person. Well, I'll say with Carter, 0:45:28.880 --> 0:45:32.080 I was like, this is my person forever, forever, forever, right, 0:45:32.840 --> 0:45:35.320 And I stand by that. I think if Carter and 0:45:35.360 --> 0:45:37.879 I didn't have the issues that we had, which were 0:45:37.880 --> 0:45:41.160 all aired on the show, I think we could have 0:45:41.200 --> 0:45:43.800 been something really great. That's the way that the world 0:45:43.840 --> 0:45:45.640 took us. I still have a lot of love, a 0:45:45.640 --> 0:45:48.160 lot of respect for him. He's in a happy relationship, 0:45:48.239 --> 0:45:51.640 we're friends. Then when I started dating my ex boyfriend, 0:45:52.560 --> 0:45:55.960 I put all of my eggs into that fucking basket. 0:45:56.200 --> 0:45:59.360 And in hindsight, I mean, I cared about it, and 0:45:59.400 --> 0:46:00.960 I'm not going to be a dick and say like 0:46:01.040 --> 0:46:04.440 fuck him, I never loved him or something. But in hindsight, 0:46:04.800 --> 0:46:08.200 it really was like I saw a goal and I 0:46:08.239 --> 0:46:10.359 wanted to achieve that goal, and that goal was I'm 0:46:10.400 --> 0:46:13.239 getting married, having a baby. I'm too old for this shit, 0:46:14.080 --> 0:46:16.279 selling my house and moving into his house. Like let 0:46:16.560 --> 0:46:19.440 you know, I quit smoking, thank god. But like that 0:46:19.600 --> 0:46:22.080 was really in the moment. It was more of a 0:46:22.760 --> 0:46:24.880 I need to please him, to prove to him that 0:46:24.920 --> 0:46:27.799 I'm ready to get pregnant, and I'm really glad that 0:46:27.840 --> 0:46:29.879 I did it for me at the end of the day. 0:46:30.200 --> 0:46:33.280 But it was just like, no matter all the fighting 0:46:33.640 --> 0:46:35.160 that he and I went through and all of the 0:46:35.239 --> 0:46:38.560 chaos and all the bullshit, I just kept going, It's okay, 0:46:38.760 --> 0:46:40.920 We're gonna be okay. Once we get pregnant, once we 0:46:40.960 --> 0:46:43.080 get married, everything's going to be okay. I'm going to 0:46:43.120 --> 0:46:46.120 be the person he wants me to be. And that 0:46:46.280 --> 0:46:49.160 was like a huge fucking mistake. So I'm very grateful 0:46:49.320 --> 0:46:52.200 that he broke up with me. I have to be, 0:46:52.200 --> 0:46:55.000 because it was like when I dated Tom Sandobal, even 0:46:55.040 --> 0:46:56.920 though I was really young, I would have stayed in 0:46:56.960 --> 0:47:00.759 that till the bitter fucking end, even though we were miserable. 0:47:01.239 --> 0:47:03.040 Do you think that was my misery? 0:47:04.000 --> 0:47:06.680 I think at times I have been and I think 0:47:06.719 --> 0:47:12.160 I'm finally like I've found my zenet and yeah, and 0:47:12.320 --> 0:47:15.520 like I when Luke and I became good friends, and 0:47:15.600 --> 0:47:18.200 just realizing like there is there are men out there 0:47:18.239 --> 0:47:20.640 who are not assholes. 0:47:20.120 --> 0:47:22.160 Who are normal, who are going to create like a 0:47:22.160 --> 0:47:23.640 safe space for you be your best right. 0:47:23.800 --> 0:47:25.120 And not to say that Luke and I have never 0:47:25.160 --> 0:47:29.840 gotten in an argument or like whatever before, because we have, 0:47:29.920 --> 0:47:33.120 and we've been on road trips together sixteen hours where 0:47:33.239 --> 0:47:37.680 we've ruffled each other's feathers. But just because one of 0:47:37.760 --> 0:47:41.160 us pops off, it doesn't mean like shit hit the fan, 0:47:41.320 --> 0:47:43.160 it's the end of the world for the rest of 0:47:43.200 --> 0:47:45.520 the day. Now we're going to fight for three days. 0:47:45.600 --> 0:47:48.239 It's like, take a breath, let's talk it out. Why 0:47:48.239 --> 0:47:52.200 did we have that moment? Apologize and move the fuck on. 0:47:52.680 --> 0:47:53.320 And it's an. 0:47:53.160 --> 0:47:55.480 Adult it's an adult relationship. 0:47:55.480 --> 0:47:58.600 It is so relaxing. It's like the elephant, and I 0:47:58.640 --> 0:48:01.520 just feel protected. I feel safe. I feel like my 0:48:01.560 --> 0:48:05.200 best interests are looked out for. I love all of it. 0:48:05.320 --> 0:48:08.279 And he's very patient and he knows that he knows 0:48:08.320 --> 0:48:11.160 all the shit. Like what is the Marilyn Monroe quote, like, 0:48:11.400 --> 0:48:13.120 you don't if you can't handle me at my worst, 0:48:13.120 --> 0:48:15.919 you don't deserve me at my best. Absolutely, And I'm 0:48:15.960 --> 0:48:19.600 not one to be like, here's all my trauma, now 0:48:19.680 --> 0:48:23.160 you take that baggage. However, I am one to say 0:48:23.719 --> 0:48:25.560 there's a lot of shit you might find out about 0:48:25.600 --> 0:48:27.480 me based on the job that I used to have. 0:48:27.760 --> 0:48:29.360 So let me just lay it out for you. And 0:48:29.400 --> 0:48:30.839 if you want to run, run now. 0:48:31.320 --> 0:48:34.200 Well, he I feel like anybody who is with you, 0:48:34.200 --> 0:48:36.960 you me, any woman. I don't need to lay my 0:48:37.040 --> 0:48:39.799 baggage out and my trauma for you. As the relationship 0:48:39.880 --> 0:48:43.880 goes on, you're gonna see it right like, you're gonna 0:48:44.040 --> 0:48:46.920 we're gonna we're gonna have fights, we're gonna do all 0:48:46.960 --> 0:48:49.560 of these little things where I'm triggered, and you're gonna know, Okay, 0:48:49.640 --> 0:48:51.959 that is a trauma for her right, so. 0:48:52.280 --> 0:48:55.799 But exactly, but like he's he gets that and he's 0:48:55.840 --> 0:48:58.959 okay with that, just as like a normal human being 0:48:59.080 --> 0:49:01.400 should be as long as you going back to what 0:49:01.440 --> 0:49:05.440 you said, huge moment, have communication, as long as you 0:49:05.480 --> 0:49:09.520 can fucking talk about it, break it down, set boundaries 0:49:10.440 --> 0:49:14.080 like he's you know, like you always words are hard, 0:49:14.920 --> 0:49:18.480 take out the things on you, take things out on 0:49:18.480 --> 0:49:20.239 the people that are closest to you. That is just 0:49:20.280 --> 0:49:22.759 like a fact, right, It shouldn't really be that way, 0:49:22.880 --> 0:49:24.600 but it's the person that you feel the most connected 0:49:24.600 --> 0:49:26.879 with that you can complain shit, complain about shit too, 0:49:27.400 --> 0:49:30.440 And I think that in a healthy relationship. What I'm 0:49:30.480 --> 0:49:34.960 learning is that that is okay and it should feel 0:49:34.960 --> 0:49:37.400 safe and okay. But also then you kind of like 0:49:37.440 --> 0:49:39.040 I don't want to do that to him all the time. 0:49:39.239 --> 0:49:41.600 I now catch myself like taking a breath and going, 0:49:41.719 --> 0:49:43.120 do I really need to call him to tell him 0:49:43.120 --> 0:49:45.840 about this bullshit that happened to me the day, just 0:49:45.840 --> 0:49:47.040 to like rain on his parade. 0:49:47.320 --> 0:49:49.960 I'm going through the same thing right now where I'm 0:49:50.000 --> 0:49:53.960 literally stopping myself from like calling people to tell them 0:49:54.000 --> 0:49:55.960 about things, And I'm like, am I just giving this 0:49:55.960 --> 0:49:59.600 more life than it even means right, it's very intense. 0:49:59.640 --> 0:50:02.799 I'm actual really proud of us. Yeah, wow, it's all good. 0:50:02.840 --> 0:50:04.240 I know that we're all in this together. 0:50:04.280 --> 0:50:04.480 Man. 0:50:04.600 --> 0:50:06.280 Yes, we're evolving every day. 0:50:06.440 --> 0:50:08.279 I dig it. And I'm so happy that you came 0:50:08.320 --> 0:50:09.200 on my podcast. 0:50:09.200 --> 0:50:10.520 Here is the first time. 0:50:11.360 --> 0:50:14.359 It's the first time, and I'm I love it though, 0:50:14.400 --> 0:50:18.600 because your podcast it really is great. I've listened. I 0:50:18.680 --> 0:50:21.640 love the name. I love you have a very good voice. 0:50:21.760 --> 0:50:25.239 Not everyone is meant to put their voice onto a 0:50:25.280 --> 0:50:28.000 mic and directly into the ears. So good on you 0:50:28.040 --> 0:50:30.680 for that. Where can people listen to your podcast? 0:50:31.000 --> 0:50:33.239 You can listen to it anywhere that you listen to 0:50:33.280 --> 0:50:38.120 your podcasts, Spotify, Amazon, Apple, et cetera, et cetera. Sex, love, 0:50:38.160 --> 0:50:39.120 and what else matters. 0:50:39.200 --> 0:50:40.920 I'm so happy for you with. 0:50:41.000 --> 0:50:43.720 You and you need to come on mind you tell. 0:50:43.560 --> 0:50:45.040 Me you you tell me when boo boo. 0:50:45.120 --> 0:50:47.759 I love you because I love my favorite thing about 0:50:48.120 --> 0:50:50.040 not my favorite thing about you, just everything else. But 0:50:50.120 --> 0:50:52.960 I love Justice Instagram and how she trolls her boyfriend 0:50:53.080 --> 0:50:57.239 and it just gives me so much life and that 0:50:57.239 --> 0:50:59.759 that that is so important in relationships too, is like 0:51:00.320 --> 0:51:03.359 trolling your significant other and like having that laugh and 0:51:03.400 --> 0:51:05.719 like that, like harmonious, like well play. 0:51:05.800 --> 0:51:07.759 I'm it's like I will say, I think a lot 0:51:07.840 --> 0:51:09.759 of people don't have the playfulness or they get to 0:51:09.880 --> 0:51:12.680 like a seriousness or like a we're adult, we're not 0:51:12.680 --> 0:51:13.319 going to act this way. 0:51:13.360 --> 0:51:14.919 And I'm like, I'm gonna be like this forever. He'll 0:51:14.960 --> 0:51:15.720 be like this forever. 0:51:15.880 --> 0:51:19.239 I'm envious in the best way possible, Yes, of your 0:51:19.320 --> 0:51:21.960 relationship with Kyle. And when you tell me you're like 0:51:22.080 --> 0:51:24.560 going home or you're to and Kyle's doing this, that 0:51:24.600 --> 0:51:27.080 and the other. You're making dinner, you're having Christmas wherever, 0:51:27.800 --> 0:51:30.880 I'm like, I want to be there. It just seems 0:51:30.880 --> 0:51:31.560 like good vibes. 0:51:31.640 --> 0:51:33.120 Well, either of you are more than welcome. 0:51:33.239 --> 0:51:37.560 When she bought the furniture and Kyle is like, oh 0:51:37.600 --> 0:51:40.319 my god, ess I died bought this patio furniture. And 0:51:40.360 --> 0:51:42.560 she's like, for our kind of small patio, which isn't 0:51:42.680 --> 0:51:45.680 mine's like half that size in my apartment now. But 0:51:46.040 --> 0:51:47.799 he was like, it's not gonna fit. It's not gonna fit. 0:51:47.840 --> 0:51:49.480 And she's like, well, if we just move it over 0:51:49.560 --> 0:51:51.799 a little bit this way now, the door shuts and 0:51:51.840 --> 0:51:54.839 it's just everything, just watching them just like at each 0:51:54.880 --> 0:51:57.080 other in like the cutest way possible. I'm like, oh 0:51:57.080 --> 0:51:59.240 my god, there's love stone in this world. 0:51:59.440 --> 0:52:02.040 I know anything is possible. Thank you. I love you 0:52:02.040 --> 0:52:04.520 guys so much. What a great episode And I love 0:52:04.600 --> 0:52:06.760 you guys so much. Thank you for listening to another 0:52:06.760 --> 0:52:09.279 episode of the Keep Them La La podcast. I will 0:52:09.360 --> 0:52:12.040 catch you next a week next week.