WEBVTT - How Men Think with Gleb Savchenko 0:00:00.920 --> 0:00:03.880 We're taking you inside the mind of a man. This 0:00:04.559 --> 0:00:08.880 is how men thick and I heard radio podcast. Hey guys, 0:00:09.000 --> 0:00:11.719 I'm lips up Chenko. You know me as a professional 0:00:11.800 --> 0:00:15.920 danswering boreographer danswer with the stars and I am stuper 0:00:16.040 --> 0:00:20.280 happy to co post and be a guest host. Um 0:00:20.360 --> 0:00:24.600 on how men think? I'm gonna be answering all your 0:00:24.680 --> 0:00:29.960 questions and the the main like, the fascinating question is 0:00:30.000 --> 0:00:34.840 that how men think? So let's get started. Producers put 0:00:34.880 --> 0:00:37.040 me in the hot steed and I have to answer 0:00:37.120 --> 0:00:39.479 all of these eleven questions that are in front of me, 0:00:40.360 --> 0:00:44.519 and let's start a question number one? What are you 0:00:44.600 --> 0:00:48.479 known for? Tell us about yourself what I'm known for. 0:00:48.680 --> 0:00:53.400 I mean, I'm hot Russian professional board dancer and dancer 0:00:53.479 --> 0:00:56.120 with the stars. That's what I'm known for. But I'm 0:00:56.160 --> 0:00:59.960 also a girl that I have two beautiful daughters living 0:01:00.080 --> 0:01:03.160 just turned eleven yesterday actually, and I have a lot 0:01:03.280 --> 0:01:07.319 who's four years old. Um, and you know my life 0:01:07.360 --> 0:01:10.199 is around them and dance and that's what I've pretty 0:01:10.240 --> 0:01:14.399 much like known for. And um yeah, who are you 0:01:14.520 --> 0:01:20.920 in your personal life? Who am I in my personal life? Oh? 0:01:22.000 --> 0:01:23.800 What does it mean? Mean? Like I don't even know 0:01:23.840 --> 0:01:27.640 who are you in the person? Like I think, um, 0:01:27.680 --> 0:01:32.199 you know I am, you know, I'm a dad. Number one. 0:01:32.440 --> 0:01:36.640 I think I'm I've been. I'm dreaven always to be 0:01:36.880 --> 0:01:40.840 a better person every day. I come from nothing. Uh 0:01:40.880 --> 0:01:44.480 and I'm in Hollywood living literally in American dream Like 0:01:44.520 --> 0:01:47.080 if you would like it would have more time, like 0:01:47.120 --> 0:01:49.280 I would tell you, like my whole life story, which 0:01:49.320 --> 0:01:54.000 is I think it's pretty crazy, but um yeah, I 0:01:54.120 --> 0:01:58.960 just I'm just just a regular normal guy with two 0:01:59.040 --> 0:02:03.520 kids saying go and you know, trying to trying to 0:02:03.520 --> 0:02:08.880 teach celebrities to chat to walk. What three TV shows 0:02:08.919 --> 0:02:12.160 are you binge watching right now? That's a good one, Um, 0:02:13.040 --> 0:02:15.720 the three D TV shows? So I would say number one. 0:02:15.760 --> 0:02:18.280 I'm still like it's an older show, but I think 0:02:18.840 --> 0:02:21.600 like if someone like I haven't watched it as the 0:02:21.639 --> 0:02:24.639 money has, I'm obsessed with the show. I think it's 0:02:24.639 --> 0:02:28.200 an incredible show. The recent one that I just watched 0:02:28.240 --> 0:02:32.560 is with Game also Super Sick, Like I love that show. 0:02:33.200 --> 0:02:37.359 And the one that I just started watching is The Made. 0:02:37.800 --> 0:02:42.360 I think it's like a pretty like a intense show 0:02:42.480 --> 0:02:46.040 that kind of like actually, you know, see what's going 0:02:46.080 --> 0:02:48.239 on with like people with other people like where they're 0:02:48.280 --> 0:02:49.680 going through. You know what I mean is it's like 0:02:49.720 --> 0:02:51.960 it's a really beautiful shot at and produced. I think 0:02:51.960 --> 0:02:56.200 it's a really good show. What is your favorite food? 0:02:57.520 --> 0:03:05.680 What's my favorite food? What's my favorite food? I think pizza. 0:03:07.280 --> 0:03:10.959 I love pizza like I love any kind of pizza. 0:03:11.000 --> 0:03:15.560 I think I can eat pizza every day. Um yeah, 0:03:15.600 --> 0:03:18.000 that's like my favorite food. I know it's really bad. 0:03:18.000 --> 0:03:20.360 It's like super healthy. And I supposed to represent like 0:03:20.400 --> 0:03:23.880 a health and wellness and I was like pizza, you know, 0:03:25.040 --> 0:03:31.399 so yeah, I love pizza. Tell us about your career. Okay, 0:03:31.600 --> 0:03:38.040 my career. Um, look, my career is pretty crazy. I 0:03:38.760 --> 0:03:42.000 you know, I grew up a mom originally from Moscow, Russia. 0:03:42.080 --> 0:03:46.320 Grew up with mom and dad, and they kind of 0:03:46.360 --> 0:03:50.840 put me in the dance gas and I started, you know, dancing, 0:03:50.920 --> 0:03:54.120 and by the age of thirteen fourteen, I knew it 0:03:54.160 --> 0:03:56.720 was gonna be my career. Like in my culture is 0:03:56.800 --> 0:03:59.080 like if you do something for a specially for parents, 0:03:59.160 --> 0:04:02.080 and they probably put me in dance colleges because they 0:04:02.120 --> 0:04:04.160 wanted to keep me off the streets and like you know, 0:04:04.840 --> 0:04:06.960 for kids to do something, but then they push you. 0:04:07.000 --> 0:04:09.880 They push you so hard that it becomes your you know, 0:04:09.960 --> 0:04:14.040 like it becomes you know, something that you do, and 0:04:14.080 --> 0:04:17.840 then you have to do it great and you have 0:04:17.920 --> 0:04:21.320 to put all your energy into it. And I danced 0:04:21.360 --> 0:04:23.200 with all my life and then then moved to different 0:04:23.200 --> 0:04:26.000 country a lot via I dance there with a girl 0:04:26.000 --> 0:04:29.480 represent the country for a couple of years. Uh. Came 0:04:29.520 --> 0:04:32.520 back to Russian kind of at the age of seventeen eighteen, 0:04:32.560 --> 0:04:35.360 I realized I was like, I don't really want to 0:04:35.400 --> 0:04:38.960 do dance anymore, Like there's like, you know, I only 0:04:39.000 --> 0:04:43.560 spend money because there's no like price, uh money for 0:04:43.640 --> 0:04:46.240 the competitions, and that was like a Russian champion at 0:04:46.240 --> 0:04:48.640 that time, Like you always have to travel on your 0:04:48.880 --> 0:04:51.560 with your own expand you have to take lessons, you 0:04:51.560 --> 0:04:53.760 have to buy coustomes, buy shoes, so it becomes like 0:04:53.800 --> 0:04:56.920 an expensive hobby. So it doesn't give you unless you teach. 0:04:57.960 --> 0:04:59.919 But and with teaching, like in Russia, like you can 0:05:00.000 --> 0:05:02.320 to really make anything. So I was like, I gotta 0:05:02.400 --> 0:05:06.000 do something. So I became a fitness dance fitness instructor 0:05:06.080 --> 0:05:08.280 in one of the fitness centers in Moscow, and one 0:05:09.080 --> 0:05:12.520 um kind of mine and she came up to me 0:05:12.560 --> 0:05:14.960 after the class. She was like, have you ever tried modeling? 0:05:15.120 --> 0:05:18.280 And I was like, no, never tried modeling. She was like, 0:05:18.320 --> 0:05:20.880 I'm gonna take you to model agency. So she brought 0:05:20.880 --> 0:05:26.400 me to model agency. I uh, I started doing modeling 0:05:26.480 --> 0:05:29.920 and became like super successful. Like I was like on 0:05:29.960 --> 0:05:33.200 every cover of the magazine in Russian doing music videos 0:05:33.240 --> 0:05:35.520 and with this, and like I was like, oh my god, 0:05:35.640 --> 0:05:38.480 like I'm gonna be the next breath pit. But for 0:05:38.520 --> 0:05:41.240 me to become an ex breath pit, I have to 0:05:41.839 --> 0:05:44.520 move to America, you know what I mean. So I 0:05:44.600 --> 0:05:49.120 was like great, So I moved to America and I 0:05:49.160 --> 0:05:53.360 lived in New York for about three years. I did uh, 0:05:53.640 --> 0:05:56.960 I did modeling, and I kind of keep myself going. 0:05:57.120 --> 0:06:01.960 I was doing UM still talking they studio UM, and 0:06:02.080 --> 0:06:04.279 that's actually the time when dance start. As you just 0:06:04.400 --> 0:06:08.120 started to remember in on the time score that they 0:06:08.160 --> 0:06:11.840 build this huge glass box where me and my partner 0:06:11.839 --> 0:06:14.200 were like promoting this we'll start of this new brand 0:06:14.240 --> 0:06:19.320 new TV show where UM coming up. What's your biggest 0:06:19.320 --> 0:06:24.360 fear in life? Heights? I'm afraid of heights. I'm like 0:06:24.520 --> 0:06:28.680 super scared of heights. What makes you the most happy. 0:06:30.920 --> 0:06:33.680 I think just the time with family and kids, and 0:06:33.800 --> 0:06:37.279 like what makes me most happy is the positive people, 0:06:37.440 --> 0:06:41.400 the energy, you know, like every person has its own energy, 0:06:41.600 --> 0:06:45.440 and you know, I just love being around good people 0:06:45.520 --> 0:06:49.240 with good energy and interrupt and just have this good 0:06:49.360 --> 0:06:53.680 vibe that look like makes me super happy. What's your 0:06:53.680 --> 0:07:00.880 biggest pet? Peeve um? I'm like I have like a 0:07:01.000 --> 0:07:03.800 major O C D. Like I hate when someone washes 0:07:03.839 --> 0:07:06.520 the dishes and they don't like wipe the sink around, 0:07:06.600 --> 0:07:08.720 like if they if I could see like splashes of 0:07:08.760 --> 0:07:11.040 water around the sink, that frets me out, like I 0:07:11.120 --> 0:07:14.600 can't do it, and here like I can't like it. 0:07:15.120 --> 0:07:18.040 That's like Scott now like like if I stay here 0:07:18.040 --> 0:07:25.440 on the floor, was like, what is your ideal Saturday morning? 0:07:26.360 --> 0:07:31.880 Oh my god, what's my ideal Saturday morning? Listen? Simple 0:07:32.080 --> 0:07:35.680 sipping a champagne on the boat and central pain. I've 0:07:35.720 --> 0:07:38.520 never done this, but that will be ideal on Saturday morning. 0:07:38.600 --> 0:07:41.680 Are you more of the athlete or the armchair quarterback? 0:07:42.720 --> 0:07:48.000 I'm more than I'm more an athlete. I'm super active. Yeah. 0:07:48.400 --> 0:07:52.560 And lastly, what keeps you motivated? What keeps you motivated? 0:07:54.680 --> 0:08:03.960 Never never being satisfied with with it's always like it's 0:08:04.000 --> 0:08:08.560 weird because and that's like something that I think it's 0:08:08.640 --> 0:08:13.280 either um like uh like a cultural thing or the 0:08:13.320 --> 0:08:15.760 way we've been like I've been brought up. It's like 0:08:16.240 --> 0:08:19.960 it's not being negative, but it's not being satisfied hundred 0:08:20.000 --> 0:08:22.600 percent because so you think like, oh you can like 0:08:22.800 --> 0:08:25.760 I always can do better, right, so like you can 0:08:25.800 --> 0:08:27.600 do better than like you could have like even like 0:08:27.680 --> 0:08:30.800 sometimes like let's simple example, right, like we we do 0:08:30.840 --> 0:08:33.679 with dance performing dance right, and dance goes great, We've 0:08:33.720 --> 0:08:36.160 got great scores on the show or something, but then 0:08:36.160 --> 0:08:39.080 I look at the video like and I'm never ever 0:08:39.200 --> 0:08:43.079 satisfied like, oh, that was awesome, you know, Like I 0:08:43.080 --> 0:08:45.559 told myself to do that because I'm working with someone 0:08:45.559 --> 0:08:47.800 who's never danced before. So I have to be positive 0:08:48.000 --> 0:08:49.920 and be like, oh that was great, you know, like 0:08:50.240 --> 0:08:53.199 actually when I look at it, even for myself, I'm 0:08:53.240 --> 0:08:56.040 like this one could have been like this one could 0:08:56.080 --> 0:08:58.480 have been better. So that keeps you motivated just to 0:08:58.559 --> 0:09:00.840 be better in junior, you know what I mean, Like 0:09:01.000 --> 0:09:04.000 with everything I do. Alright, guys, so we're gonna take 0:09:04.040 --> 0:09:06.400 a quick break and when we come back. I'm gonna 0:09:06.440 --> 0:09:12.880 answer all your questions. Hey guys, and Ashley from the 0:09:12.880 --> 0:09:17.079 Almost Famous podcast, It's that time of year where drama 0:09:17.280 --> 0:09:20.400 fills the air. The Bachelor is back with an all 0:09:20.440 --> 0:09:24.520 new season premiering January three. There's a new host, Jesse Palmer, 0:09:24.760 --> 0:09:28.559 and a brand new Bachelor, Clayton. Clayton is a Midwest 0:09:28.559 --> 0:09:31.880 boy that has that great smile, nice teeth, and he's 0:09:31.960 --> 0:09:34.800 really tall as let's call it what it is, he's 0:09:34.840 --> 0:09:39.640 a beefcake. Okay, Well, Clayton seems to be a good 0:09:39.679 --> 0:09:43.840 guy though, and he can't wait to find love, get married, 0:09:43.880 --> 0:09:47.080 and have kids. And he believes more than anything that 0:09:47.160 --> 0:09:49.520 his future wife is on this show. It sounds like 0:09:49.520 --> 0:09:52.640 a fairy tale but also a bit of an emotional 0:09:52.640 --> 0:09:56.800 world coaster, because Clayton tells three different women he's falling 0:09:56.800 --> 0:10:01.040 in love with him. Technically, he told one, I couldn't 0:10:01.080 --> 0:10:03.520 be more sure that I'm falling in love with you, 0:10:04.000 --> 0:10:07.080 and another one, I'm falling in love with you, and 0:10:07.120 --> 0:10:10.520 the third one, I am in love with you. You 0:10:10.600 --> 0:10:13.840 don't miss a thing. It's your years of over analyzing 0:10:14.000 --> 0:10:16.720 everything that guys say. But his heart is in the 0:10:16.840 --> 0:10:22.040 right place. But other parts of him as we find 0:10:22.040 --> 0:10:24.640 out what he admits to two different women that he 0:10:24.760 --> 0:10:27.640 was intimate with both of them. Yeah, I don't think 0:10:27.640 --> 0:10:29.840 it's gonna go over well, we'll be breaking down at 0:10:29.840 --> 0:10:32.680 all on the almost famous podcast Ben is Married Now 0:10:32.800 --> 0:10:36.760 Well Ashley's a mom will change our opinions of what 0:10:36.840 --> 0:10:41.120 we think is acceptable single behavior. Good question find out 0:10:41.120 --> 0:10:43.520 on the almost Famous podcast on our Heart Radio and 0:10:43.559 --> 0:10:54.400 wherever you listen to podcasts. Al Right, guys, let's get 0:10:54.400 --> 0:10:58.880 to our first caller and uh yeah, here we go. Hi. 0:10:59.280 --> 0:11:03.240 My question would be, Um, do men ever learn to 0:11:03.320 --> 0:11:08.080 communicate better on their own? To communicate that? I think, yeah, 0:11:08.400 --> 0:11:12.880 hundred percent. I think it's all about self improvement and 0:11:13.080 --> 0:11:16.400 if he I think, for it depends on the person again, 0:11:17.400 --> 0:11:22.280 but for me personally, I think over the years, like 0:11:22.320 --> 0:11:24.240 I've learned a lot of things, you know, and it's 0:11:24.320 --> 0:11:27.760 not you know, you want to improve yourself and just 0:11:27.840 --> 0:11:31.120 be better for the person that you're with, you know 0:11:31.120 --> 0:11:35.400 what I mean. I think it's like super important, um, 0:11:35.600 --> 0:11:38.760 not just to just to communicate, you know, and listen, 0:11:39.080 --> 0:11:43.680 like always try to like listen that you know, whoever 0:11:43.720 --> 0:11:45.640 is in front of you trying to tell you something. 0:11:45.840 --> 0:11:50.040 You know, um, and let the person speak and like 0:11:50.400 --> 0:11:54.520 try to like understand, not like stand like be stubborn 0:11:54.720 --> 0:11:57.480 like no, no, like you know, but like try to 0:11:57.600 --> 0:12:00.600 understand what this person is trying to tell you, because 0:12:01.120 --> 0:12:05.320 it's you know, it's important to hear. It's important to hear, 0:12:05.360 --> 0:12:09.000 and it's important to listen. That's how you can, you know, 0:12:09.200 --> 0:12:14.200 improve yourself otherwise to just being like super closed off. 0:12:14.280 --> 0:12:19.000 And you know what do you think, Emma, you agree 0:12:19.040 --> 0:12:23.480 with me? Yeah? But does that come in part with 0:12:24.480 --> 0:12:28.360 growing with your partner? Do you think like a man 0:12:28.520 --> 0:12:31.720 could understand how to communicate with a girl better without 0:12:31.760 --> 0:12:38.720 having their partner instruct them or get criticism from them. Well, 0:12:38.760 --> 0:12:44.440 there's the situations, right, there's situations like give me an example, right, 0:12:44.720 --> 0:12:49.679 let's stay with dating, right, and you want to go 0:12:50.960 --> 0:12:54.080 somewhere for Christmas and I don't want to go somewhere 0:12:54.080 --> 0:13:02.000 for Christmas? Right, So what do we do talk about exactly? 0:13:02.280 --> 0:13:04.840 We talk about it, and we decide and let listen, 0:13:05.480 --> 0:13:07.920 you tell them your opinion why you want to go there. 0:13:08.000 --> 0:13:11.240 Like they'll be like, listen, maybe we'll go to you know, 0:13:11.400 --> 0:13:15.200 to a lake or something, or go to Mexico or 0:13:15.240 --> 0:13:18.280 something like that. So it's it's all about the conversation. 0:13:19.640 --> 0:13:22.680 I think people need to have a conversation and be 0:13:22.920 --> 0:13:25.800 able to hear each other, do you know what I mean? 0:13:26.600 --> 0:13:31.120 So like putting yourself on that person's place and be like, well, 0:13:31.240 --> 0:13:33.200 I understand where they come up, unless there's like a 0:13:33.320 --> 0:13:37.240 ridiculous like you know, so, I mean that makes sense. 0:13:37.360 --> 0:13:41.160 I guess it also depends on the stage of where 0:13:41.200 --> 0:13:43.440 you are in a relationship. If you guys are together 0:13:43.640 --> 0:13:48.439 or just beginning to talk, well, I think it doesn't matter. 0:13:48.480 --> 0:13:51.040 I think if you if you're married for fifteen years 0:13:51.200 --> 0:13:53.360 or you just start dating. Do you know what I mean? 0:13:53.400 --> 0:13:56.679 It's it's always gonna be something like, but it's just 0:13:56.720 --> 0:13:58.920 a different like how you're saying. It's a different stage 0:13:58.960 --> 0:14:02.160 of the conversation, do you know what I mean? But 0:14:02.240 --> 0:14:04.440 there's always that you have to always me. If you 0:14:04.440 --> 0:14:07.600 don't like something, tell me and I'll be like no, no, no, 0:14:07.760 --> 0:14:11.720 like or I'll be like okay, cool, yeah, like okay, 0:14:11.760 --> 0:14:15.920 I'll whatever. But thanks for calling. I appreciate your good question. 0:14:16.280 --> 0:14:23.800 Thank you appreci All right, here we go the next color. Hannah. Hi, Um, 0:14:23.800 --> 0:14:26.800 my question is I'm wondering if it is considered a 0:14:26.840 --> 0:14:30.160 red flag if you talk about an ex boyfriend or 0:14:30.280 --> 0:14:40.000 girlfriend on a first date. I mean, it depends how 0:14:40.000 --> 0:14:42.200 you talk about it, do you know what I mean? Like, 0:14:42.600 --> 0:14:47.680 so I went on a date, uh, and I actually 0:14:47.720 --> 0:14:51.560 had a conversation with the girl who I'm actually seeing 0:14:51.600 --> 0:14:54.120 now on the first day. We talked about my action. 0:14:54.160 --> 0:14:57.800 I've been married for fifteen years, but I'm we're super 0:14:58.080 --> 0:15:04.080 cool now have to divorce. But I think it's not 0:15:04.240 --> 0:15:07.480 It depends on if you're positive and you're genuinely nice 0:15:07.600 --> 0:15:10.960 person and you're like, it's not like unless you're like 0:15:11.400 --> 0:15:13.600 shooting on someone, then that would be like, oh, that's 0:15:13.640 --> 0:15:16.000 so weird. Like if he talks about her like that, 0:15:16.040 --> 0:15:18.440 like what he's going to talk about me or something 0:15:18.480 --> 0:15:20.200 like that, that's you know. I think it depends on 0:15:20.240 --> 0:15:24.600 the person really, But what do you think I think? 0:15:25.120 --> 0:15:27.160 I mean, I think I've been on dates in the 0:15:27.200 --> 0:15:30.200 past where they ask if I've been in relationships before, 0:15:30.200 --> 0:15:33.520 and I've always been hesitant to answer yes or no 0:15:33.640 --> 0:15:36.200 because I don't want them to think I'm talking about 0:15:36.240 --> 0:15:39.320 my ex boyfriend too much. I tell you this straight on. 0:15:39.640 --> 0:15:42.440 You gotta be you gotta be straightforward, You've gotta be honest. 0:15:42.560 --> 0:15:45.360 And if he's okay to that, he's cool because then 0:15:45.600 --> 0:15:47.360 you can take it to the next level or whatever. 0:15:47.400 --> 0:15:49.440 But if you're like trying to hide something or not 0:15:49.520 --> 0:15:52.840 to say something or choose the words how you say, 0:15:52.880 --> 0:15:55.880 that's already not like a real thing because you're trying 0:15:55.960 --> 0:16:00.200 to like cater like to someone who you're know I 0:16:00.240 --> 0:16:02.560 really are you know what I mean? You always have 0:16:02.680 --> 0:16:05.560 to be yourself and just be like, Yo, I've been 0:16:05.840 --> 0:16:10.640 on twenty five thousand dates did not work. Hopefully you're 0:16:10.680 --> 0:16:14.680 the one because I like or something. Just be super 0:16:14.720 --> 0:16:18.600 cool yeah, and be like I think personally, you know 0:16:18.600 --> 0:16:20.280 what I mean, if we're going the date and they'll 0:16:20.320 --> 0:16:25.160 be like okay, Hannah, how many relationships serious relationships have 0:16:25.280 --> 0:16:30.720 you had in the past. I'm asking like four four 0:16:31.280 --> 0:16:34.000 How that was the last relationship? How long was your 0:16:34.080 --> 0:16:38.760 last relationship? Six months? Six months? Why would you guys 0:16:38.760 --> 0:16:42.600 break up? Just what some red flags? I think on 0:16:43.400 --> 0:16:45.280 his part and maybe my part, we just weren't a 0:16:45.280 --> 0:16:49.480 good match. Well, you see, for me, if I would 0:16:49.560 --> 0:16:51.720 be on the date with you, that's not like a 0:16:51.800 --> 0:16:54.280 straightforward answer, Like I know, it's there's a lot of 0:16:54.280 --> 0:16:57.400 personal stuff, but eventually, like I would want to know 0:16:57.920 --> 0:17:02.160 what was the red flags, because then me coming from 0:17:02.200 --> 0:17:05.359 like a genue, like a good you know, like a good, 0:17:05.400 --> 0:17:08.159 like a like a you know what I mean, like 0:17:08.359 --> 0:17:12.400 being me like I would wanna maybe I don't make 0:17:12.440 --> 0:17:14.800 those kind of mistakes or something like that, Like there's 0:17:14.800 --> 0:17:21.119 always you know, just honest, so they know, because like 0:17:21.240 --> 0:17:23.840 life is too short. Why do I want to waste 0:17:23.840 --> 0:17:26.840 now with someone that is not telling me the truth 0:17:26.920 --> 0:17:29.360 of trying to be who not they're not really are 0:17:29.680 --> 0:17:36.439 or whatever, because then it's like, you know, there's no point. No, 0:17:36.600 --> 0:17:40.080 that's that's great advice. I'm definitely gonna gonna remember that. 0:17:40.160 --> 0:17:43.640 Thank you so much. Thank you, thanks for a question. 0:17:44.280 --> 0:17:50.280 Have a nice day you too. We got the next question. Hi, 0:17:50.920 --> 0:17:54.200 Hi tomorrow. It's so good to me. You nice to me. 0:17:54.359 --> 0:17:58.520 It's too Um well i'll jump into my question. I 0:17:58.520 --> 0:18:01.040 don't know how much time I have, so I'll get 0:18:01.119 --> 0:18:06.479 right in. Uh dating, of course. Um, it's all about dating. 0:18:06.840 --> 0:18:10.240 The older I get, the harder it is, the more 0:18:10.560 --> 0:18:14.400 I'm confused at how forward I should be with men, 0:18:14.680 --> 0:18:18.560 especially on a first date. So I'd love your take 0:18:18.640 --> 0:18:24.280 on how much you think I guess women should put 0:18:24.320 --> 0:18:27.400 out there with what their needs and wants in a partner, 0:18:27.520 --> 0:18:32.040 especially on the first date or two, right, So I 0:18:32.080 --> 0:18:35.400 think it really depends on the person. So do you 0:18:36.480 --> 0:18:38.480 I want to go and have nice dinner in the 0:18:38.520 --> 0:18:41.479 conversation with someone, or do you want to go and 0:18:41.520 --> 0:18:43.920 get play? Do you want to have a good time 0:18:43.960 --> 0:18:46.920 and go to a movie? And because well, because I'm 0:18:46.920 --> 0:18:49.560 just saying how it is, you know, we're all humans. 0:18:49.760 --> 0:18:51.960 We'll all want to have sex, we all want to eat, 0:18:52.000 --> 0:18:54.639 the world all want to sleep, you know, so like 0:18:54.800 --> 0:18:59.520 what's your intention? I think if you're like stupid, straightforward, 0:18:59.600 --> 0:19:03.800 then they're like, yo, you don't want to do that 0:19:03.880 --> 0:19:06.080 because that will be like, oh my god, like does 0:19:06.160 --> 0:19:08.080 she do that with every single guy that she goes 0:19:08.119 --> 0:19:10.440 on a date with. But then at the same time, 0:19:10.440 --> 0:19:14.639 they're like there's always a moment during that evening or 0:19:14.760 --> 0:19:18.320 dinner over drinks where you kind of like you feel 0:19:18.359 --> 0:19:23.320 that moment where like that's the time where I'm either 0:19:23.440 --> 0:19:26.480 like taking it to a different like level if you again, 0:19:26.520 --> 0:19:30.040 if you like that, right, but a hundred percent agree 0:19:30.080 --> 0:19:33.080 with you, Like it's so freaking hard when you get 0:19:33.160 --> 0:19:38.880 older to like to because eventually it's not about like 0:19:39.200 --> 0:19:41.680 and I think I'm just speaking for myself, I don't 0:19:41.720 --> 0:19:44.760 know how other guys like, they're different, Like some of 0:19:44.800 --> 0:19:48.600 my friends are like stay single, you know, like have 0:19:49.000 --> 0:19:51.399 like you know, blah blah blah, Like you know, do 0:19:51.440 --> 0:19:55.080 you think? And for me, it's not about this. It's 0:19:55.080 --> 0:19:56.919 all about the good vibes. Like if I have a 0:19:56.960 --> 0:20:00.840 good vibe with the person and like we're just you know, 0:20:01.000 --> 0:20:04.399 chilling and it's all like really really connected, that's a 0:20:04.600 --> 0:20:07.879 very different so and like the sex is just becomes 0:20:08.359 --> 0:20:13.080 an addition to that, right, But I think, yeah, again, 0:20:13.119 --> 0:20:17.320 it's what you want. What do you want? Well, I mean, 0:20:17.440 --> 0:20:22.040 everyone tells me to stay single, so I'm like, but 0:20:22.160 --> 0:20:25.199 as I'm dating, I'm like, this is fun and I 0:20:25.359 --> 0:20:28.000 exactly like you said, I want to be able to 0:20:28.680 --> 0:20:31.480 um enjoy it and have a friendship and see where 0:20:31.480 --> 0:20:34.879 that leads. But then I'm also thinking, okay, do I 0:20:34.960 --> 0:20:39.359 tell them I actually want to see how far this goes. 0:20:39.480 --> 0:20:43.920 I'm looking for a life partner. So does that scare 0:20:44.040 --> 0:20:48.840 the person at the get go? Um? You know it's not. 0:20:48.880 --> 0:20:51.760 I think depends what It depends what this person wants. 0:20:52.440 --> 0:20:54.560 You know, this person wants just to have fun, and 0:20:54.640 --> 0:20:57.400 you'll be like, Okay, cool. We can have fun, right, 0:20:57.920 --> 0:21:03.240 but then you know, yeah, yeah, then it's not meant today. Yeah, 0:21:03.440 --> 0:21:06.119 just take it, take take a step by step, you 0:21:06.160 --> 0:21:09.160 know what I mean. And but always always think about 0:21:09.280 --> 0:21:14.000 like also like don't waste your time, you know what 0:21:14.040 --> 0:21:16.040 I mean. If you see he's like a player, like 0:21:16.160 --> 0:21:19.240 you know, you know, he's like one day he's with you, 0:21:19.280 --> 0:21:21.119 and then you call him, he doesn't pick up the phone, 0:21:21.200 --> 0:21:24.439 and he knows. He like there's like like I know, 0:21:24.560 --> 0:21:26.879 something like making up stories be like oh yeah, like 0:21:26.920 --> 0:21:28.760 I'm so sick because he's out in the movies with 0:21:28.800 --> 0:21:33.520 his friends. So he doesn't really value you as you 0:21:33.560 --> 0:21:35.600 know that much. So for him, you are as just 0:21:35.680 --> 0:21:41.159 a fun moment like fun, you know, so then you listen, cool, 0:21:41.480 --> 0:21:44.000 see you later. Hard to get into that guy's mind, 0:21:44.200 --> 0:21:47.160 but I know we have to trust it's actually not 0:21:47.400 --> 0:21:51.080 We're we're very primitive, Like we're very primitive. We're not 0:21:51.200 --> 0:21:55.320 like very complex. You guys are more complex. Girls are 0:21:55.320 --> 0:21:58.720 more complex. You're like overthinking, you're in your head. You 0:21:58.920 --> 0:22:02.159 create that like it's like a moment like I and 0:22:02.240 --> 0:22:04.439 I've noticed that it was like there's like a little 0:22:04.760 --> 0:22:08.280 thought of something. You create this huge story with like 0:22:09.440 --> 0:22:11.720 row to the left road to what if he did this? 0:22:11.840 --> 0:22:16.720 Oh my god. And then it's actually like just because 0:22:16.840 --> 0:22:19.520 my phone was on silence and I was driving and 0:22:19.520 --> 0:22:24.800 I wasn't parking my car in the garage, and that's it. Yeah, yeah, 0:22:25.240 --> 0:22:29.159 don't overthink it. Well, thank you for that. Thank you, 0:22:29.480 --> 0:22:33.600 thank you, thank you, thank you. Good. Okay, all right, 0:22:33.680 --> 0:22:41.280 I see you too. Hello, Hi, good. I love the 0:22:41.440 --> 0:22:45.760 art behind you. I love it so much. How are 0:22:45.800 --> 0:22:50.600 you doing today. I'm doing great. I'm better now that 0:22:50.640 --> 0:22:54.040 I'm talking to you. Thank you. I feel the same way. 0:22:55.920 --> 0:22:57.720 So I'm supposed to just ask the question, is that 0:22:57.760 --> 0:23:01.879 how we do it? Yeah, ask me anything, not really, 0:23:01.920 --> 0:23:07.119 But because I'm a counselor, I feel like, um, the 0:23:07.200 --> 0:23:11.800 stigma about counseling and therapy is like even deeper when 0:23:11.800 --> 0:23:15.479 it comes to men's health. So my question for you is, 0:23:16.280 --> 0:23:18.359 I guess maybe a little bit selfish for me to 0:23:18.760 --> 0:23:21.000 help connect with men, but what do you think that 0:23:21.080 --> 0:23:24.119 we as counselors can do to kind of bridge that 0:23:24.200 --> 0:23:26.399 gap and and let men know that this is a 0:23:26.440 --> 0:23:28.960 good place for them to be, you know, like maybe 0:23:29.200 --> 0:23:32.199 content to put out there or just kind of ways 0:23:32.240 --> 0:23:36.120 to cater to the the problems that men have so 0:23:36.160 --> 0:23:39.720 that it looks attractive to go to counseling and get 0:23:39.720 --> 0:23:49.399 that help. I'm dunk counseling twice. But I think the 0:23:49.440 --> 0:23:52.399 way it's been done it was very and that was 0:23:52.480 --> 0:23:56.000 like something that when uh, we both were trying to 0:23:56.040 --> 0:23:59.320 save about the marriage, it was like I would say, 0:23:59.359 --> 0:24:03.679 three years ago, oh uh and uh it was just 0:24:03.720 --> 0:24:06.480 done in a very weird way because I wasn't to 0:24:06.600 --> 0:24:11.040 her and uh, I remember I was literally during the day, 0:24:11.080 --> 0:24:14.200 like we did it like twice a week. I had 0:24:14.240 --> 0:24:16.760 to go in the audience, like when there's no like 0:24:16.760 --> 0:24:19.080 there's no audience in the theater, it's just to be quiet, 0:24:19.240 --> 0:24:22.280 like it's an empty theater, it's dark, and my ex 0:24:22.320 --> 0:24:26.440 wife would be in the room with a person, you 0:24:26.520 --> 0:24:28.719 know what I mean. So it was pre COVID, so 0:24:28.760 --> 0:24:33.119 it felt like it felt like because we're trying to 0:24:33.160 --> 0:24:34.560 figure it out, like we were trying to figure it 0:24:34.600 --> 0:24:37.199 out us, what's happening, you know what I mean. And 0:24:37.359 --> 0:24:42.480 it felt to me that the you know, that person 0:24:42.600 --> 0:24:44.920 was like almost on her side, like they were trying 0:24:44.920 --> 0:24:47.960 to like figure it out me instead of figured out us. 0:24:48.480 --> 0:24:51.680 So I think for me at that moment was very 0:24:51.840 --> 0:24:55.000