1 00:00:00,080 --> 00:00:02,600 Speaker 1: My eighteen year old kids got a paternity test because 2 00:00:02,680 --> 00:00:05,680 Speaker 1: something looked off. My wife, Kelly, and I have known 3 00:00:05,680 --> 00:00:08,240 Speaker 1: each other for over twenty years and have been married 4 00:00:08,320 --> 00:00:10,840 Speaker 1: for eighteen years. We have seventeen year old twins, a 5 00:00:10,880 --> 00:00:13,640 Speaker 1: boy and a girl, and OP found something out Sam. 6 00:00:13,480 --> 00:00:14,720 Speaker 2: They're having a child together. 7 00:00:15,680 --> 00:00:18,159 Speaker 1: Two days ago, I found out that both of my 8 00:00:18,320 --> 00:00:20,880 Speaker 1: kids are not mine. My wife, Kelly, and I met 9 00:00:20,880 --> 00:00:24,080 Speaker 1: as coworkers right out of college. We were both very ambitious, 10 00:00:24,160 --> 00:00:26,720 Speaker 1: so after working for a couple of years, we decided 11 00:00:26,800 --> 00:00:28,320 Speaker 1: to start a business together. 12 00:00:28,680 --> 00:00:32,199 Speaker 2: Yo, this, guys, people are in not only do you 13 00:00:32,240 --> 00:00:34,400 Speaker 2: have kids with the person, not only are you married. 14 00:00:34,400 --> 00:00:35,680 Speaker 2: We got a business together. 15 00:00:35,800 --> 00:00:38,440 Speaker 1: We fell in love and after a year starting our business, 16 00:00:38,520 --> 00:00:40,720 Speaker 1: we got married. A couple of months into marriage, we 17 00:00:40,800 --> 00:00:44,000 Speaker 1: had a massive fight about the direction we wanted to 18 00:00:44,040 --> 00:00:46,760 Speaker 1: take the business in. You should have asked what direction 19 00:00:46,920 --> 00:00:49,720 Speaker 1: she was taking her business in? If you catch what 20 00:00:49,800 --> 00:00:50,159 Speaker 1: I mean? 21 00:00:50,440 --> 00:00:53,320 Speaker 2: Was she throwing that ass around? Who is the CTO? 22 00:00:53,600 --> 00:00:56,880 Speaker 2: The chief touching your wife officer? Uh oh? 23 00:00:57,000 --> 00:00:59,520 Speaker 1: After a big fight, I left our home, but she 24 00:00:59,600 --> 00:01:01,960 Speaker 1: came to me a couple weeks later and we compromised. 25 00:01:02,040 --> 00:01:04,160 Speaker 1: We've been inseparable ever since. 26 00:01:04,440 --> 00:01:07,680 Speaker 2: We were on a break and so I'm getting that vibe. 27 00:01:08,120 --> 00:01:10,399 Speaker 2: Well to see like a few months or a few 28 00:01:10,400 --> 00:01:14,240 Speaker 2: weeks after this break that they she falls pregnant. We'll see. 29 00:01:14,240 --> 00:01:17,000 Speaker 2: Maybe it was outside of the break, and you know, 30 00:01:17,640 --> 00:01:21,360 Speaker 2: if it happened during the break, like more understandable or understandable. 31 00:01:21,400 --> 00:01:25,160 Speaker 1: Kelly got pregnant around this time. And we've been through 32 00:01:25,280 --> 00:01:28,200 Speaker 1: thick and thin. Our business has had several hardships, but 33 00:01:28,240 --> 00:01:30,240 Speaker 1: we have weathered all of them together. We were always 34 00:01:30,280 --> 00:01:32,440 Speaker 1: there for each other. We could always depend on each other, 35 00:01:32,520 --> 00:01:35,640 Speaker 1: and I love her so so much. She is a 36 00:01:35,680 --> 00:01:37,839 Speaker 1: part of me and I couldn't even imagine a life 37 00:01:37,880 --> 00:01:38,280 Speaker 1: without her. 38 00:01:38,400 --> 00:01:41,479 Speaker 2: Start imagining. Boy, Oh, get that. 39 00:01:41,480 --> 00:01:45,360 Speaker 1: Imagination flowid, baby, because you're gonna need it. I trusted 40 00:01:45,360 --> 00:01:50,000 Speaker 1: her absolutely until this happened. Kelly has been crying profusely 41 00:01:50,040 --> 00:01:53,280 Speaker 1: and apologizing constantly. She's told me that during this time 42 00:01:53,320 --> 00:01:55,880 Speaker 1: that we had a fight at the start of our marriage, 43 00:01:55,960 --> 00:02:00,000 Speaker 1: she got a little loppy drunk one time and slept 44 00:02:00,120 --> 00:02:03,080 Speaker 1: with a random guy. But she said she has not 45 00:02:03,160 --> 00:02:04,040 Speaker 1: cheated on me since. 46 00:02:04,160 --> 00:02:06,160 Speaker 2: I mean, are they were on a break. 47 00:02:06,440 --> 00:02:11,440 Speaker 1: They were separated. Yeah, that's a dicey one. They weren't 48 00:02:11,440 --> 00:02:14,960 Speaker 1: there wasn't an exclamation of like we're done or like 49 00:02:15,120 --> 00:02:17,480 Speaker 1: I need I guess he said it through his actions. 50 00:02:17,520 --> 00:02:19,880 Speaker 2: But a couple of weeks, that's crazy leading for a 51 00:02:19,960 --> 00:02:21,880 Speaker 2: couple of weeks. He left for a couple of weeks. 52 00:02:21,919 --> 00:02:23,800 Speaker 2: It wasn't her he left for Yeah, he left the 53 00:02:23,800 --> 00:02:26,800 Speaker 2: house for a couple of weeks. Yo, a few weeks 54 00:02:26,880 --> 00:02:27,720 Speaker 2: no contact? 55 00:02:28,000 --> 00:02:29,360 Speaker 1: You know what was not getting contact? 56 00:02:29,360 --> 00:02:30,160 Speaker 2: Her cheeks? Yeah? 57 00:02:30,400 --> 00:02:33,080 Speaker 1: Now was she gonna go weeks without getting her cheeks plundered? 58 00:02:33,320 --> 00:02:35,320 Speaker 2: Bro? With all that business stress, you got a d 59 00:02:35,480 --> 00:02:40,120 Speaker 2: stress listening? Come on, come on, bro. Also, I'm just 60 00:02:40,200 --> 00:02:43,160 Speaker 2: like always so impressed at like the one night stand 61 00:02:43,160 --> 00:02:45,160 Speaker 2: guys that are just shooting bullets. 62 00:02:44,960 --> 00:02:48,080 Speaker 1: I mean like straight shooters like them in the NBA, 63 00:02:48,120 --> 00:02:52,079 Speaker 1: because they get every time batting average is like eight hundred. 64 00:02:52,400 --> 00:02:57,240 Speaker 1: Good God, Now I trusted her absolutely. This betrayal has 65 00:02:57,320 --> 00:02:58,560 Speaker 1: left me disoriented. 66 00:02:58,720 --> 00:03:01,040 Speaker 2: She probably she should have told him, You should have 67 00:03:01,080 --> 00:03:03,520 Speaker 2: told him, Yeah, if they got back together. But like 68 00:03:03,639 --> 00:03:05,679 Speaker 2: of the times to betray someone. 69 00:03:05,639 --> 00:03:11,800 Speaker 1: That is the best time, the least egregious window of time. 70 00:03:12,160 --> 00:03:16,799 Speaker 2: Yeah. Yeah, it's just like, man, that one mistake a 71 00:03:16,880 --> 00:03:18,840 Speaker 2: lot of baggage. Who man? 72 00:03:18,960 --> 00:03:21,160 Speaker 1: I told Kelly I needed time to process this, and 73 00:03:21,160 --> 00:03:23,360 Speaker 1: I'm currently staying at a hotel. I don't know what 74 00:03:23,400 --> 00:03:25,640 Speaker 1: I'm even doing anymore. The last two days have been 75 00:03:25,680 --> 00:03:29,000 Speaker 1: a complete blur. I feel like a zombie, completely unable 76 00:03:29,080 --> 00:03:31,160 Speaker 1: to feel or process anything. 77 00:03:31,200 --> 00:03:31,440 Speaker 2: Now. 78 00:03:31,520 --> 00:03:34,080 Speaker 1: To be clear, I didn't intend to abandon my kids. 79 00:03:34,200 --> 00:03:36,800 Speaker 1: I might not be their biological father, but I'm still 80 00:03:36,840 --> 00:03:38,280 Speaker 1: their dad and I love them dearly. 81 00:03:38,400 --> 00:03:40,560 Speaker 2: Does that not change your opinion for kids you think 82 00:03:40,600 --> 00:03:41,200 Speaker 2: are now. 83 00:03:41,240 --> 00:03:44,240 Speaker 1: After raising them for eighteen years? I would say it's 84 00:03:44,320 --> 00:03:47,520 Speaker 1: the relationship and the nurturing that you've given. 85 00:03:47,600 --> 00:03:49,480 Speaker 2: I mean, I like, I understand you're still going to 86 00:03:49,560 --> 00:03:52,240 Speaker 2: care for them. Yeah, but like, does that not just 87 00:03:52,280 --> 00:03:55,720 Speaker 2: like change your perception even a little bit hurts? 88 00:03:55,800 --> 00:04:00,240 Speaker 1: But I personally probably wouldn't be able to disassociate at that. 89 00:04:00,320 --> 00:04:02,880 Speaker 2: I don't think you disassociate. Yeah yeah, yeah, but it's 90 00:04:02,960 --> 00:04:06,160 Speaker 2: like it has to have an effect on your relationship 91 00:04:06,240 --> 00:04:09,360 Speaker 2: with your kids in some way, that information, right, Yeah. 92 00:04:09,120 --> 00:04:11,600 Speaker 1: Yeah, I'm sure. But I could also see, like if 93 00:04:11,600 --> 00:04:13,400 Speaker 1: I'm in his shoes, like there's. 94 00:04:13,240 --> 00:04:14,480 Speaker 2: Like an equivalent of adoption. 95 00:04:14,560 --> 00:04:16,839 Speaker 1: I guess, yeah, yeah, like it's the bond is so 96 00:04:17,000 --> 00:04:19,000 Speaker 1: like it's definitely a stain. But I don't know that 97 00:04:19,040 --> 00:04:22,240 Speaker 1: it would like like all of those years almost like 98 00:04:22,279 --> 00:04:23,000 Speaker 1: the emotional back. 99 00:04:24,000 --> 00:04:27,400 Speaker 2: It would not like stop you from like a father 100 00:04:27,600 --> 00:04:30,719 Speaker 2: to them, obviously, But I'm just like wondering, like it 101 00:04:30,800 --> 00:04:34,680 Speaker 2: has to have like maybe I'm like totally wrong here, 102 00:04:34,720 --> 00:04:37,680 Speaker 2: but I can't imagine that it doesn't like affect the 103 00:04:37,800 --> 00:04:38,960 Speaker 2: relationship in some way. 104 00:04:39,120 --> 00:04:41,000 Speaker 1: I could, I could say for me, I think I 105 00:04:41,040 --> 00:04:42,600 Speaker 1: would be able to bury it as what I'm trying 106 00:04:42,600 --> 00:04:45,400 Speaker 1: to say, Oh, like, yeah, it's like that's so strong 107 00:04:45,480 --> 00:04:47,120 Speaker 1: that it would kind of just like almost I. 108 00:04:47,120 --> 00:04:49,719 Speaker 2: Think that I agree with that. Yeah, it makes sense. 109 00:04:49,760 --> 00:04:51,840 Speaker 1: And right now I'm sitting on my hotel bed and 110 00:04:51,880 --> 00:04:54,839 Speaker 1: I have not eaten anything today. My thoughts are a mess, 111 00:04:54,920 --> 00:04:57,160 Speaker 1: so I'm writing this down to help me process it. 112 00:04:57,240 --> 00:04:59,680 Speaker 1: Kelly has always been a great wife and an excellent 113 00:04:59,680 --> 00:05:01,560 Speaker 1: business partner, But I don't know if I'll be able 114 00:05:01,640 --> 00:05:03,920 Speaker 1: to look at her the same ever again, or if 115 00:05:03,960 --> 00:05:06,279 Speaker 1: I will be the same person again. I do not 116 00:05:06,520 --> 00:05:07,880 Speaker 1: know how to move forward from here. 117 00:05:07,960 --> 00:05:11,280 Speaker 2: We were on a brook. Yeah, you can't leave for 118 00:05:11,360 --> 00:05:14,680 Speaker 2: like three weeks no contact and and expect your wife 119 00:05:14,680 --> 00:05:17,279 Speaker 2: to not clap cheeks. That's what I'm saying. After a 120 00:05:17,279 --> 00:05:20,400 Speaker 2: big fight, Like three weeks is such a long time, 121 00:05:20,480 --> 00:05:20,840 Speaker 2: such a. 122 00:05:20,760 --> 00:05:22,919 Speaker 1: Long time, that's how many? How many seconds is that? 123 00:05:23,080 --> 00:05:25,160 Speaker 1: I'm sorry? Is that a billion seconds? 124 00:05:25,240 --> 00:05:27,680 Speaker 2: Yeah? That's a billion people that you could fuck? How 125 00:05:27,800 --> 00:05:28,040 Speaker 2: is she? 126 00:05:28,440 --> 00:05:30,680 Speaker 1: How is she not gonna get dicked down for a 127 00:05:30,760 --> 00:05:31,560 Speaker 1: billion seconds? 128 00:05:31,640 --> 00:05:31,839 Speaker 2: Dude? 129 00:05:32,120 --> 00:05:37,320 Speaker 1: That's insane on an unimagin imaginable, unimaginable. She's hot, she's 130 00:05:37,360 --> 00:05:40,160 Speaker 1: in demand, she's in demand. But there is an updates. 131 00:05:40,360 --> 00:05:42,960 Speaker 2: Actually, yes, yoh, I'm excited for this. 132 00:05:43,160 --> 00:05:45,120 Speaker 1: Thank you for the overwhelming response I got on my 133 00:05:45,200 --> 00:05:47,200 Speaker 1: last post. I wrote it down just to clear my head. 134 00:05:47,240 --> 00:05:49,240 Speaker 1: The day after my post, I called my children and 135 00:05:49,279 --> 00:05:51,080 Speaker 1: told them I love them. They were scared that I 136 00:05:51,160 --> 00:05:54,080 Speaker 1: might leave them. I told them that they're absolutely still 137 00:05:54,120 --> 00:05:57,320 Speaker 1: my children, even though I'm not their biological father, and 138 00:05:57,320 --> 00:05:59,720 Speaker 1: that I will not be abandoning them. I just needed 139 00:05:59,760 --> 00:06:02,080 Speaker 1: to think about my relationship with their mother. I saw 140 00:06:02,120 --> 00:06:05,279 Speaker 1: several comments telling me that they're not my children because 141 00:06:05,320 --> 00:06:08,119 Speaker 1: I don't have their DNA, but that matters very little 142 00:06:08,120 --> 00:06:10,479 Speaker 1: to me. I raised them, and they are my children. 143 00:06:10,520 --> 00:06:12,479 Speaker 1: I spent time thinking about how to move forward with 144 00:06:12,560 --> 00:06:15,239 Speaker 1: Kelly after this. I was angry that she had slept 145 00:06:15,279 --> 00:06:18,080 Speaker 1: with someone else. After we had gotten married, I calmed 146 00:06:18,120 --> 00:06:20,200 Speaker 1: down and I really thought about the whole situation. I 147 00:06:20,240 --> 00:06:22,800 Speaker 1: wanted to call my lawyer to talk about separation, but 148 00:06:22,839 --> 00:06:25,760 Speaker 1: I kept thinking of our life together. So I decided 149 00:06:25,760 --> 00:06:28,080 Speaker 1: to talk to Kelly and give her a chance. I 150 00:06:28,160 --> 00:06:30,159 Speaker 1: called her and went back home. The next day. My 151 00:06:30,240 --> 00:06:32,320 Speaker 1: kids were thrilled to see me, and we spent some 152 00:06:32,400 --> 00:06:34,279 Speaker 1: time together. Kelly and I went up to our room. 153 00:06:34,320 --> 00:06:34,720 Speaker 2: After that. 154 00:06:34,800 --> 00:06:37,680 Speaker 1: I hadn't spoken to her properly since we saw the results. 155 00:06:37,800 --> 00:06:39,840 Speaker 1: I gave her time to talk. Kelly told me it 156 00:06:39,960 --> 00:06:42,800 Speaker 1: never occurred to her that the kids might not be mine. 157 00:06:42,839 --> 00:06:44,760 Speaker 1: She told me that we got in a fight early 158 00:06:44,800 --> 00:06:46,960 Speaker 1: in our marriage. She was angry at me for leaving 159 00:06:47,040 --> 00:06:49,680 Speaker 1: over a business dispute and was waiting for me to return. 160 00:06:49,760 --> 00:06:51,760 Speaker 1: She said she went to a bar one day and 161 00:06:51,800 --> 00:06:55,040 Speaker 1: got not be wasted. She picked up some guy and 162 00:06:55,240 --> 00:06:58,120 Speaker 1: didn't remember much of what happened that night. The guy 163 00:06:58,279 --> 00:07:00,440 Speaker 1: was gone before she woke up the next day, and 164 00:07:00,480 --> 00:07:04,039 Speaker 1: she felt extremely guilty. She wanted to tell me, but 165 00:07:04,200 --> 00:07:06,440 Speaker 1: was afraid that I would leave her. To be fair, 166 00:07:06,520 --> 00:07:08,680 Speaker 1: I was hot headed and a stubborn guy back then, 167 00:07:08,800 --> 00:07:11,320 Speaker 1: so I probably would have filed for divorce without a 168 00:07:11,320 --> 00:07:13,960 Speaker 1: second thought. To her, it was a drunken mistake that 169 00:07:14,080 --> 00:07:17,200 Speaker 1: would never come out, so she didn't want to risk 170 00:07:17,280 --> 00:07:19,000 Speaker 1: our marriage over it, and I never would have found 171 00:07:19,040 --> 00:07:21,120 Speaker 1: out about it if she didn't get pregnant that night. 172 00:07:21,160 --> 00:07:24,960 Speaker 1: She broke down multiple times and apologized constantly through the conversation. 173 00:07:25,200 --> 00:07:27,720 Speaker 1: I believed her story. Kelly has been my rock and 174 00:07:27,800 --> 00:07:30,160 Speaker 1: partner throughout my life, and I wouldn't be where I 175 00:07:30,200 --> 00:07:33,680 Speaker 1: am today without her. We've trusted each other absolutely. This 176 00:07:33,840 --> 00:07:36,360 Speaker 1: ordeal has been a massive dent in my belief in 177 00:07:36,400 --> 00:07:38,520 Speaker 1: her as a wife, but I still trust her as 178 00:07:38,560 --> 00:07:41,320 Speaker 1: a partner. We had long conversations about our future, and 179 00:07:41,360 --> 00:07:43,560 Speaker 1: I told her I was willing to give us a chance. 180 00:07:43,680 --> 00:07:45,800 Speaker 1: I made it clear that we might not succeed and 181 00:07:45,880 --> 00:07:48,440 Speaker 1: I might leave, but I was willing to try. I 182 00:07:48,440 --> 00:07:51,560 Speaker 1: assured my children that no matter what happened with our marriage, 183 00:07:51,600 --> 00:07:53,880 Speaker 1: I will always love them and I will always be 184 00:07:53,920 --> 00:07:56,480 Speaker 1: our father. We decided to give marriage counseling a try. 185 00:07:56,640 --> 00:07:58,840 Speaker 1: My wife asked a therapist friend of hers, and she 186 00:07:58,920 --> 00:08:01,840 Speaker 1: recommended a counselor. We start appointments next week. 187 00:08:02,040 --> 00:08:04,600 Speaker 2: It does feel like like one mistake, you know, Yeah, 188 00:08:04,720 --> 00:08:09,640 Speaker 2: it feels like one one mistake, especially with what was 189 00:08:09,680 --> 00:08:12,480 Speaker 2: going on. Yeah, Like it's not like he's like totally 190 00:08:12,520 --> 00:08:15,320 Speaker 2: not at fault. Yeah, but you know, you never would 191 00:08:15,320 --> 00:08:17,560 Speaker 2: have expected, you know, you know, you never expect your 192 00:08:17,560 --> 00:08:20,200 Speaker 2: wife to go get pregnant from another man's kid. 193 00:08:20,400 --> 00:08:23,400 Speaker 1: You don't, you don't. But yeah, this is I think, 194 00:08:23,440 --> 00:08:25,440 Speaker 1: like you said, this is the window where it could 195 00:08:25,480 --> 00:08:27,680 Speaker 1: happen the best. 196 00:08:28,040 --> 00:08:32,120 Speaker 2: Yeah, that's another guy. Ye, this window. 197 00:08:32,320 --> 00:08:34,360 Speaker 1: If you thought that was crazy, check out this one 198 00:08:34,400 --> 00:08:37,040 Speaker 1: where Op forces his son to get a paternity test 199 00:08:37,240 --> 00:08:38,720 Speaker 1: click here check the link in the description