1 00:00:00,120 --> 00:00:02,280 Speaker 1: Hey there, Kevin Pollock here, I wanted to invite you 2 00:00:02,320 --> 00:00:06,000 Speaker 1: all to become a Patreon supporter of Alchemy this. Go 3 00:00:06,120 --> 00:00:09,479 Speaker 1: to Patreon dot com slash alchemy this. To become a 4 00:00:09,560 --> 00:00:12,600 Speaker 1: v i P member. You'll get bonus episodes that will 5 00:00:12,640 --> 00:00:14,720 Speaker 1: not be available to non v i P s. These 6 00:00:14,720 --> 00:00:17,919 Speaker 1: include the live shows and also special scenes that will 7 00:00:17,960 --> 00:00:22,079 Speaker 1: record in our regular weekly in studio recordings uh that 8 00:00:22,079 --> 00:00:24,360 Speaker 1: will only be released to v i P members. You'll 9 00:00:24,400 --> 00:00:27,320 Speaker 1: be able to join the live Alchemy This cast hangout sessions. 10 00:00:27,400 --> 00:00:30,200 Speaker 1: You're gonna get an exclusive hotline phone number. That's right. 11 00:00:30,640 --> 00:00:33,320 Speaker 1: You can call in, leave a message, have a request, 12 00:00:33,520 --> 00:00:36,760 Speaker 1: a comment, a question of any of the Alchemists. You're 13 00:00:36,800 --> 00:00:39,720 Speaker 1: gonna get your scene, suggestions for getting top priority, all 14 00:00:39,840 --> 00:00:44,040 Speaker 1: kinds of incredible bonuses, and just be creatively involved in 15 00:00:44,040 --> 00:00:46,640 Speaker 1: the shows. We'd love to have you as a Patreon 16 00:00:46,720 --> 00:00:50,000 Speaker 1: member again. Go to Patreon dot com slash alchemy this, 17 00:00:50,479 --> 00:00:56,960 Speaker 1: and thank you. Welcome back to another episode of Alchemy 18 00:00:56,960 --> 00:00:59,360 Speaker 1: That's I'm your host, Kevin poll Guess that Kevin Bob 19 00:00:59,400 --> 00:01:03,240 Speaker 1: was that well from what you've told me. If Richard 20 00:01:03,440 --> 00:01:06,360 Speaker 1: Marks sang about it in the eighties, I'm sure you 21 00:01:06,400 --> 00:01:09,240 Speaker 1: didn't mean to break his heart exactly the way he 22 00:01:09,440 --> 00:01:12,600 Speaker 1: described it. But I digress. Let's meet our alchemists, shall we? 23 00:01:12,680 --> 00:01:14,400 Speaker 1: In no particular order? Say hello? But I have to 24 00:01:14,440 --> 00:01:19,360 Speaker 1: raggling veniche then? Or do you have a favorite Richard 25 00:01:19,440 --> 00:01:26,759 Speaker 1: Mark's song? Excellent? Next up? Nothing says walk waking up 26 00:01:27,160 --> 00:01:29,600 Speaker 1: like some sweet heeny in your cup. It's James Hene 27 00:01:30,280 --> 00:01:34,120 Speaker 1: Jimmy jingle most of the way. What would you like 28 00:01:34,240 --> 00:01:36,959 Speaker 1: Richard Marks to know about you? Well, I would like 29 00:01:37,160 --> 00:01:41,120 Speaker 1: Richard Marks to know that I am a really big 30 00:01:41,480 --> 00:01:45,759 Speaker 1: fan of learning about new people. And is he one 31 00:01:45,800 --> 00:01:51,160 Speaker 1: of the Marks brothers of the market would be? Okay, 32 00:01:51,240 --> 00:01:53,600 Speaker 1: So he's still alive if he were in fact related 33 00:01:53,640 --> 00:01:59,360 Speaker 1: to them. Yeah. No, he's unbelievably famous singer songwriter. Oh 34 00:01:59,440 --> 00:02:02,440 Speaker 1: I love his music? Yeah? You you know? No, I 35 00:02:02,440 --> 00:02:10,840 Speaker 1: don't know his music. I can it? Is it relevant now? Music? Oh? Man? Well, 36 00:02:10,840 --> 00:02:12,840 Speaker 1: he just did a magical show at a trouper door 37 00:02:12,960 --> 00:02:18,360 Speaker 1: here in Los Angeles. So he's alive. Okay, Richard Marks, 38 00:02:21,320 --> 00:02:25,400 Speaker 1: Just like Sport, he needs reviews. If you can review 39 00:02:25,600 --> 00:02:28,840 Speaker 1: Richard Mark, I mean, I think, in all fairness I 40 00:02:28,840 --> 00:02:31,080 Speaker 1: have to listen to his music first. I'm not gonna. 41 00:02:31,120 --> 00:02:33,120 Speaker 1: I won't leave a review for him if it's it 42 00:02:33,160 --> 00:02:36,040 Speaker 1: says here he's a big fan of yours. Room for 43 00:02:36,120 --> 00:02:39,320 Speaker 1: laughter because Craig Atkowski is here to fill your cup. Coco. 44 00:02:39,919 --> 00:02:43,120 Speaker 1: Please complete the following lyric from the Richard Marks song 45 00:02:43,639 --> 00:02:52,280 Speaker 1: Don't Mean Nothing, Don't Mean Nothing A rapper part of 46 00:02:52,320 --> 00:02:55,800 Speaker 1: the lyrics. So complete this lyric if please. The director 47 00:02:55,880 --> 00:02:57,920 Speaker 1: smiles as you walk in the door. He says, I 48 00:02:57,960 --> 00:03:06,320 Speaker 1: love you work, babe, but you're just like a whore. Marks, 49 00:03:06,560 --> 00:03:10,520 Speaker 1: I believe not what we're looking for. Yeah, yeah, yeah. 50 00:03:11,080 --> 00:03:13,880 Speaker 1: And last, but not quite the least, it's Joey Greer 51 00:03:14,680 --> 00:03:17,680 Speaker 1: another cup of joe Please. If you were to meet 52 00:03:17,760 --> 00:03:20,880 Speaker 1: Richard Marks in the next hour, what would you say? 53 00:03:21,080 --> 00:03:26,720 Speaker 1: For real? Can you please get my car? Get in 54 00:03:26,720 --> 00:03:29,800 Speaker 1: your car? Can you get my car? My Sky has 55 00:03:29,880 --> 00:03:36,960 Speaker 1: platinum album. You overestimated our collective affinity. I think Gang 56 00:03:37,080 --> 00:03:41,160 Speaker 1: is gonna love this one. I just needed everyone to 57 00:03:41,200 --> 00:03:47,760 Speaker 1: know the lack of affinity is a who's into the 58 00:03:47,880 --> 00:03:51,440 Speaker 1: Richard Marks like myself. He was very big in the 59 00:03:51,480 --> 00:03:56,080 Speaker 1: eighties and nineties. All right, let's get to a first 60 00:03:56,080 --> 00:04:03,400 Speaker 1: scene night give a ship all thank you. I should 61 00:04:03,400 --> 00:04:07,000 Speaker 1: first mention that we really need you. You talking to you, 62 00:04:07,080 --> 00:04:09,520 Speaker 1: our favorite listener, please write a review of the show 63 00:04:09,560 --> 00:04:12,600 Speaker 1: in the next fifty two hours. I'm waiting. Apparently this 64 00:04:12,680 --> 00:04:15,840 Speaker 1: is what's needed together. I'm right here. I'm gonna set 65 00:04:15,920 --> 00:04:18,440 Speaker 1: stand by this microphone with my headphones on until I 66 00:04:18,440 --> 00:04:21,320 Speaker 1: get a signal from Joey Greer that you have in 67 00:04:21,400 --> 00:04:23,640 Speaker 1: fact written a review. Joey, why don't you write one 68 00:04:23,640 --> 00:04:29,360 Speaker 1: of those reviews right now for us? All right? How 69 00:04:29,360 --> 00:04:35,520 Speaker 1: do you spell marks? Oh? Today's scene suggestions are gathered 70 00:04:35,520 --> 00:04:37,719 Speaker 1: from our listeners email. If you'd like to submit yours, 71 00:04:37,720 --> 00:04:39,920 Speaker 1: please write to the podcast at your name here and 72 00:04:40,000 --> 00:04:42,520 Speaker 1: offer me this dot com that that's your name here 73 00:04:42,680 --> 00:04:46,120 Speaker 1: at alchemy this dot com. My first scene comes from Charlotte, 74 00:04:46,200 --> 00:04:48,960 Speaker 1: who wrote, Hello, all love the podcast. Thanks for the 75 00:04:49,040 --> 00:04:52,159 Speaker 1: last Tuesdays and Thursdays are great, so on so forth. 76 00:04:53,040 --> 00:04:55,240 Speaker 1: People really want to phone in that first part. My 77 00:04:55,320 --> 00:04:58,080 Speaker 1: scene suggestion comes from the most painful part of my 78 00:04:58,279 --> 00:05:03,120 Speaker 1: daily life, the school drop off line between the traffic directors, 79 00:05:03,160 --> 00:05:05,880 Speaker 1: the moms who get out to put their backpacks on 80 00:05:06,000 --> 00:05:08,680 Speaker 1: their nine year olds, and the dads who think they're 81 00:05:08,680 --> 00:05:12,159 Speaker 1: about the rules. So we're all slaves to the drop 82 00:05:12,160 --> 00:05:14,279 Speaker 1: off line. Is hell on earth. Please I beg of 83 00:05:14,400 --> 00:05:17,000 Speaker 1: you give me a reason to laugh about it all. Truly, 84 00:05:17,400 --> 00:05:20,920 Speaker 1: this podcast is my favorite. Nothing makes me laugh harder 85 00:05:21,160 --> 00:05:25,320 Speaker 1: than Snoofer. After many episodes, I still can't figure out 86 00:05:26,200 --> 00:05:31,640 Speaker 1: consistent name for that flemy hillbilly voice. Also, I'm trying 87 00:05:31,640 --> 00:05:33,560 Speaker 1: to do my husband to go with me to l 88 00:05:33,600 --> 00:05:36,080 Speaker 1: A for a live show. We are at the West 89 00:05:36,120 --> 00:05:38,080 Speaker 1: Side Comedy with you the first Sunday of every month, 90 00:05:38,440 --> 00:05:40,479 Speaker 1: so please won't you join us? Oh she didn't write that, 91 00:05:40,520 --> 00:05:43,120 Speaker 1: I just put that in there. Um. But he argues 92 00:05:43,160 --> 00:05:45,120 Speaker 1: it's too much of a drive from Phoenix. Actually it's 93 00:05:45,120 --> 00:05:47,560 Speaker 1: about four hours. It's like six. But it's not too 94 00:05:47,640 --> 00:05:49,080 Speaker 1: much of a drive. I drive it all the time, 95 00:05:49,160 --> 00:05:56,440 Speaker 1: do you well? Hashtag blasted We my my My wife's 96 00:05:56,440 --> 00:05:58,400 Speaker 1: family has a summer home in Sedona, so we go 97 00:05:58,440 --> 00:06:00,200 Speaker 1: there as much as we can, and we passed through 98 00:06:00,279 --> 00:06:02,520 Speaker 1: Phoenix on the way. It takes about six hours if 99 00:06:02,520 --> 00:06:04,839 Speaker 1: you do speed, it's like way quicker, did just take 100 00:06:04,880 --> 00:06:08,480 Speaker 1: the ten? Yeah, yeah, yeah, thank you for that. If 101 00:06:08,520 --> 00:06:10,839 Speaker 1: you wouldn't mind throwing his name Joe in as a 102 00:06:10,920 --> 00:06:16,440 Speaker 1: selfish character in the scene somehow that would he truly 103 00:06:16,480 --> 00:06:21,440 Speaker 1: love you too? Thanks all of you. Sure, Look, we're 104 00:06:21,440 --> 00:06:24,640 Speaker 1: not opening the gate yet. Okay, we opened the gate 105 00:06:24,800 --> 00:06:28,320 Speaker 1: at seven o'clock. Dash needs to get in there. Okay, Well, 106 00:06:28,400 --> 00:06:32,200 Speaker 1: Dash is gonna have to wait. Can't wait, can't wait. Look, 107 00:06:32,200 --> 00:06:35,520 Speaker 1: it's about three minutes. You're a kid in yet. I 108 00:06:35,520 --> 00:06:37,240 Speaker 1: don't have a kid, and you don't know what it's like. 109 00:06:37,279 --> 00:06:40,160 Speaker 1: And Dashiell needs to get in there. I understand. All 110 00:06:40,200 --> 00:06:41,840 Speaker 1: the kids need to get into school. I want them 111 00:06:41,880 --> 00:06:44,120 Speaker 1: to be in set over. The gates aren't open until seven, 112 00:06:44,120 --> 00:06:46,360 Speaker 1: all right, I just want to learn, sir. All right, 113 00:06:46,440 --> 00:06:49,960 Speaker 1: this is this Nashville. Okay, So how did you get 114 00:06:49,960 --> 00:06:54,360 Speaker 1: behind the gate? Yeah, here's a question. Why is there 115 00:06:54,400 --> 00:06:56,640 Speaker 1: a gate? Oh? The gates there to protect the kids 116 00:06:56,680 --> 00:06:58,480 Speaker 1: and protect us as well. I guess we just want 117 00:06:58,480 --> 00:07:04,080 Speaker 1: to make sure the purity perimeter around the elementary school. Yes, yes, 118 00:07:04,240 --> 00:07:06,400 Speaker 1: it's four minutes still the gate opens, let me in. 119 00:07:06,720 --> 00:07:09,200 Speaker 1: Look just what it'll be seven o'clock and will open 120 00:07:09,240 --> 00:07:11,320 Speaker 1: the gate. So you need to know your name, mr. 121 00:07:11,760 --> 00:07:14,640 Speaker 1: My name is Logan Logan Logan all right, is that 122 00:07:14,680 --> 00:07:18,400 Speaker 1: with a P in the middle? Yes? And what's the 123 00:07:18,480 --> 00:07:23,040 Speaker 1: last name? Further? Logan Logan Further? Well, I'm locking that 124 00:07:23,080 --> 00:07:27,440 Speaker 1: one down to stop. Stop, stop. My daughter's gonna get 125 00:07:27,520 --> 00:07:31,480 Speaker 1: in there and uh and start warming up her voice. Okay, look, 126 00:07:31,480 --> 00:07:33,760 Speaker 1: the gate's gonna be open at seven and then she 127 00:07:33,800 --> 00:07:36,200 Speaker 1: can warm up out there, you know. No, she's got 128 00:07:36,200 --> 00:07:38,800 Speaker 1: to get in the auditorium where the acoustics are good 129 00:07:39,040 --> 00:07:41,160 Speaker 1: so you can start warming up her voice. Oh, I'm sorry. 130 00:07:41,200 --> 00:07:42,720 Speaker 1: I don't want to do this person. I want my 131 00:07:42,800 --> 00:07:45,000 Speaker 1: son in there, but not for that reason. But you 132 00:07:45,080 --> 00:07:47,880 Speaker 1: can't allow anyone else to practice for the pageant in 133 00:07:47,920 --> 00:07:50,640 Speaker 1: the auditorium before a group practice. We've signed up. No, 134 00:07:50,720 --> 00:07:53,840 Speaker 1: it's unfair. It's unfair. The group gets in there. No individuals. 135 00:07:53,960 --> 00:07:56,680 Speaker 1: We've signed up from seven to seven or four? You haven't, Yes, 136 00:07:56,760 --> 00:08:03,200 Speaker 1: we have. Oh, well, i's coming from you. I got 137 00:08:03,200 --> 00:08:05,880 Speaker 1: a secret way into the school. What do you it's 138 00:08:05,920 --> 00:08:08,080 Speaker 1: follow me. It's around the back the gate, and the 139 00:08:08,120 --> 00:08:10,920 Speaker 1: gate doesn't go all the way around the perimeter. Here. 140 00:08:11,000 --> 00:08:12,600 Speaker 1: Get your kids and keep it low. We don't want 141 00:08:12,600 --> 00:08:14,520 Speaker 1: to find out about this. Who are you? Why do 142 00:08:14,560 --> 00:08:19,360 Speaker 1: you dressed like a pirate? My name is John John, 143 00:08:19,400 --> 00:08:22,040 Speaker 1: but you can call me Captain John, all right, and 144 00:08:22,160 --> 00:08:24,160 Speaker 1: I just follow me, but keep it low. Captain John 145 00:08:24,240 --> 00:08:26,440 Speaker 1: is like two more minutes, got to be quieting to 146 00:08:26,520 --> 00:08:28,520 Speaker 1: open the gate. Yeah, but if I show you this 147 00:08:28,600 --> 00:08:30,800 Speaker 1: opening in the gate, then tomorrow you don't have to 148 00:08:30,800 --> 00:08:33,200 Speaker 1: waste We're just gonna follow Captain Johnny showing us a 149 00:08:33,240 --> 00:08:37,000 Speaker 1: secret injury. Stop. Look at the gate's gonna be open 150 00:08:37,080 --> 00:08:40,240 Speaker 1: in two minutes. Okay, um, logan, I believe it was logan. 151 00:08:40,280 --> 00:08:43,200 Speaker 1: Captain John is trying to lead us to a hole 152 00:08:43,240 --> 00:08:46,760 Speaker 1: in the gate. Captain John the imaginary character that's created 153 00:08:46,800 --> 00:08:48,680 Speaker 1: by the collective mind of the school. You're telling me 154 00:08:48,720 --> 00:08:52,720 Speaker 1: it's gonna show you a secret, and he's a mascot. 155 00:08:52,800 --> 00:08:54,800 Speaker 1: The kids voted on Captain John. Are you seriously? This 156 00:08:54,960 --> 00:08:57,920 Speaker 1: isn't that real? He is? We just saw him and 157 00:08:58,080 --> 00:09:00,760 Speaker 1: just invited us to follow him around in the back. Look, 158 00:09:00,800 --> 00:09:03,360 Speaker 1: if you're gonna pull my leg, make sure it comes off. Okay, 159 00:09:03,360 --> 00:09:05,599 Speaker 1: you got two minutes until the gate opens up. You 160 00:09:05,640 --> 00:09:07,760 Speaker 1: can't still be two minutes. Yeah, it's two minutes, but 161 00:09:08,320 --> 00:09:10,679 Speaker 1: two Ask where did he go? Where did he go? 162 00:09:10,760 --> 00:09:14,400 Speaker 1: Where did we all saw him? Right? I patch hook? 163 00:09:14,440 --> 00:09:20,120 Speaker 1: Can ye smell? The hook was a hook? Hands? Where 164 00:09:20,200 --> 00:09:22,760 Speaker 1: his hand? You know what I meant? Captain hook style? 165 00:09:23,400 --> 00:09:28,240 Speaker 1: Captain hooks breakfast hot dogs, breakfast hot dogs. You guys 166 00:09:28,280 --> 00:09:30,120 Speaker 1: might be out here for a while. Some No, we're 167 00:09:30,120 --> 00:09:35,440 Speaker 1: going to get in two minutes. Two minutes. Yeah, yeah, 168 00:09:35,440 --> 00:09:37,280 Speaker 1: you got it. Needs to get in because he wants 169 00:09:37,320 --> 00:09:39,199 Speaker 1: to see his desk. Okay, this desk. I want a 170 00:09:39,200 --> 00:09:44,080 Speaker 1: little breakfast hot No, we don't eat dogs. Yeah. Do 171 00:09:44,120 --> 00:09:46,600 Speaker 1: you have any vegan dogs? Yeah? We do. Okay, gluten 172 00:09:46,640 --> 00:09:50,480 Speaker 1: free bread, yes, gluten free bread. But the dog vegan? 173 00:09:50,760 --> 00:09:52,360 Speaker 1: I mean, is the dog gluten frese? Is the dog 174 00:09:52,360 --> 00:09:54,520 Speaker 1: gluten free? There's bread and the dog. There's bread in 175 00:09:54,600 --> 00:09:59,560 Speaker 1: the dog. Okay, no, no, thank you, all um. And 176 00:09:59,600 --> 00:10:02,360 Speaker 1: they have uh, they have eggs on them as well. 177 00:10:03,040 --> 00:10:04,800 Speaker 1: Oh yeah, I can crack a couple on there on 178 00:10:04,840 --> 00:10:06,640 Speaker 1: their ros hell. I don't have to cook him at all. 179 00:10:06,679 --> 00:10:12,040 Speaker 1: Has anyone seen Dashell? Has anyone seen Sequoia? No? No, 180 00:10:12,080 --> 00:10:13,959 Speaker 1: I don't. I don't know anyway. I gotta get out 181 00:10:13,960 --> 00:10:19,720 Speaker 1: of here. There you go. Wait, okay, guys, I'm missing Dashall's. 182 00:10:20,720 --> 00:10:24,000 Speaker 1: I saw Captain John and they're saying he doesn't exist. Guys, 183 00:10:24,080 --> 00:10:27,720 Speaker 1: I can't find my parents. Who are you? Got tossed 184 00:10:27,760 --> 00:10:32,719 Speaker 1: over the fence? Who are are you? My name is Bobby, 185 00:10:33,840 --> 00:10:37,120 Speaker 1: name is that I'm a little boy. Have you seen Dashell? 186 00:10:38,400 --> 00:10:40,439 Speaker 1: Have you seen Sequoia? She probably tried to yell out, 187 00:10:40,440 --> 00:10:42,960 Speaker 1: but she's on vocal rest. They don't treat me very nice. 188 00:10:42,960 --> 00:10:45,640 Speaker 1: I don't know them very well. Your kids are bullies. 189 00:10:45,920 --> 00:10:49,000 Speaker 1: No wears French braids. Yeah I know. Oh now I 190 00:10:49,120 --> 00:10:54,920 Speaker 1: remember Dashell. Not a nice kid. Okay, Bobby, I'm glad 191 00:10:54,920 --> 00:10:56,240 Speaker 1: you're on that side of the fence and I'm on 192 00:10:56,240 --> 00:10:58,360 Speaker 1: this side because if if this fence wasn't there, you 193 00:10:58,360 --> 00:11:07,840 Speaker 1: would be got back on. Come here. This is fucking nuts. 194 00:11:07,880 --> 00:11:10,559 Speaker 1: This line to get into the school's crazy law. Why 195 00:11:10,559 --> 00:11:12,760 Speaker 1: do we do this every day? I don't know. I 196 00:11:12,760 --> 00:11:14,760 Speaker 1: don't know which to the country. Please? Can you stop 197 00:11:14,800 --> 00:11:16,840 Speaker 1: fighting with me when he's in there? Every single day? 198 00:11:16,880 --> 00:11:23,959 Speaker 1: We wait, we wait out. It's okay. I just leave 199 00:11:23,960 --> 00:11:26,040 Speaker 1: it there to protect you. I don't want to go 200 00:11:26,080 --> 00:11:29,040 Speaker 1: to the country. There's animals. Don't talk down to him 201 00:11:29,120 --> 00:11:33,880 Speaker 1: like that of every animal. Honey, what do you what 202 00:11:33,920 --> 00:11:35,840 Speaker 1: do you mean I'm talking to Don you talk to 203 00:11:35,880 --> 00:11:37,720 Speaker 1: him like an adult? Are you talk to him like adult? 204 00:11:38,000 --> 00:11:46,680 Speaker 1: Leave the fucking seatbelt on? Is that adult? O? No? Maybe, 205 00:11:46,720 --> 00:11:49,040 Speaker 1: don't yell maybe that's not what talking to an adult means. 206 00:11:49,120 --> 00:11:51,120 Speaker 1: Oh yeah, like you would know. You have no idea 207 00:11:51,160 --> 00:11:54,000 Speaker 1: how to talk to adult. Excuse me, your cursing so 208 00:11:54,120 --> 00:11:56,959 Speaker 1: loud that my family can hear it, and uh, I 209 00:11:57,000 --> 00:11:59,520 Speaker 1: don't really want my kids to hear the up in 210 00:11:59,520 --> 00:12:03,560 Speaker 1: your car. I don't know if that's okay. I think 211 00:12:03,600 --> 00:12:06,640 Speaker 1: it would probably be in appropriate. I don't know. He 212 00:12:08,200 --> 00:12:12,480 Speaker 1: let us handle this, gentleman, Okay, pal, I'm starting right now. 213 00:12:13,960 --> 00:12:17,480 Speaker 1: They're watching Pokemon. Sir, sir, can you do us a 214 00:12:17,480 --> 00:12:19,319 Speaker 1: favor When you get a second, can you sit down 215 00:12:19,360 --> 00:12:21,960 Speaker 1: to a big steamy bowl of fuck? Oh my god, 216 00:12:22,040 --> 00:12:24,760 Speaker 1: did you just say, get the hell away from the car, 217 00:12:24,800 --> 00:12:27,000 Speaker 1: get the funk out of Okay? Okay, Ca'm walking away 218 00:12:27,200 --> 00:12:33,240 Speaker 1: working Jesus. Unbelievable. It's insane. It's in Pokemon, that fucking minivan. 219 00:12:33,440 --> 00:12:36,480 Speaker 1: I know, honey. So are you really the captain John? 220 00:12:36,480 --> 00:12:38,440 Speaker 1: That's on all of our T shirts? Yeah, I'm the 221 00:12:38,480 --> 00:12:41,480 Speaker 1: Captain John. I am the captain. Now follow me. I 222 00:12:41,720 --> 00:12:44,199 Speaker 1: become a captain. It became a captain because there was 223 00:12:44,240 --> 00:12:47,320 Speaker 1: a vote. Have you heard of democracy? Yeah? You didn't 224 00:12:47,360 --> 00:12:50,400 Speaker 1: kiss their ranks. We all voted for a mascot. It 225 00:12:50,440 --> 00:12:54,800 Speaker 1: was a choice between a crocodile, a unicorn, and a pirate, 226 00:12:55,080 --> 00:12:58,800 Speaker 1: and that's me. I'm the captain, now right, what are 227 00:12:58,840 --> 00:13:01,000 Speaker 1: you captain? I'm the cap to this school. Follow me. 228 00:13:01,080 --> 00:13:04,200 Speaker 1: Kit's you guys wanted to get the unicorn. You voted 229 00:13:04,240 --> 00:13:06,640 Speaker 1: for the unicorn. It's not even a real thing. Unicorns 230 00:13:06,640 --> 00:13:10,079 Speaker 1: are fake. I voted for the crocodile. That's a good choice. 231 00:13:10,120 --> 00:13:12,160 Speaker 1: But I think that I'm the better one. I've got 232 00:13:12,200 --> 00:13:14,920 Speaker 1: you know, I'm a human. Alright, This this right here, 233 00:13:14,960 --> 00:13:18,679 Speaker 1: this is actually a door. It looks like I can't 234 00:13:18,679 --> 00:13:22,440 Speaker 1: play piano very well, but you can play a little. Okay, 235 00:13:22,440 --> 00:13:26,360 Speaker 1: we play one handed. Will you call it a hook 236 00:13:26,440 --> 00:13:29,640 Speaker 1: hand or just a hook? I call it a hook? 237 00:13:29,840 --> 00:13:31,679 Speaker 1: Why did you get the hook? And it's right through 238 00:13:31,720 --> 00:13:44,520 Speaker 1: this door? Might I get okay? Okay, Wow, you shot 239 00:13:44,559 --> 00:13:47,800 Speaker 1: that dog in the face. It's a muscar. It's it 240 00:13:47,840 --> 00:13:51,679 Speaker 1: works as a kind of guns not all the way 241 00:13:51,720 --> 00:14:03,199 Speaker 1: to Oh I'm sure he did. Okay, I got it. 242 00:14:03,360 --> 00:14:08,520 Speaker 1: Just gonna stay the corn would never do. I don't 243 00:14:08,559 --> 00:14:12,160 Speaker 1: think putting her shoe in the dog's mouth is gonna 244 00:14:12,280 --> 00:14:17,840 Speaker 1: kill it. Okay, okay, turn your heads. If I turned 245 00:14:17,840 --> 00:14:23,760 Speaker 1: my head. You're gonna snap it. I won't. Let's just 246 00:14:23,840 --> 00:14:28,040 Speaker 1: move away from the dog. It's gonna die. This is 247 00:14:28,080 --> 00:14:40,760 Speaker 1: the word. Can we just leave the dog and my friends? Okay, okay, okay, 248 00:14:41,720 --> 00:14:52,720 Speaker 1: gets castle there? You? Oh my god, what happened to here? Okay, 249 00:14:52,920 --> 00:14:57,080 Speaker 1: pulled it? Clear off? Please get me away. Captain John, 250 00:14:58,000 --> 00:15:01,680 Speaker 1: you have not an imagine a mascot at all. No, 251 00:15:01,720 --> 00:15:05,680 Speaker 1: I'm not an imaginary killer, not a dog killer. I 252 00:15:05,760 --> 00:15:09,680 Speaker 1: killed a dog. Okay, I'm glad all the parents could 253 00:15:09,680 --> 00:15:12,520 Speaker 1: make it here today. Um. First off, I just want 254 00:15:12,560 --> 00:15:16,760 Speaker 1: to say, uh, sorry about the gate issue. Also, this 255 00:15:16,840 --> 00:15:20,280 Speaker 1: conversation will be recorded, and uh we don't want that 256 00:15:20,320 --> 00:15:23,840 Speaker 1: to you know, have any of you hold your tongues, 257 00:15:23,840 --> 00:15:25,480 Speaker 1: but at the same time think about what you say 258 00:15:25,520 --> 00:15:27,960 Speaker 1: because words are pretty powerful. We are live streaming this, 259 00:15:28,120 --> 00:15:32,440 Speaker 1: so um uh. We have decided to do a elementary 260 00:15:32,440 --> 00:15:36,280 Speaker 1: school tribunal. Try doctor John for the trauma that he 261 00:15:36,360 --> 00:15:39,240 Speaker 1: has created for the students as well as Doctor John. 262 00:15:40,080 --> 00:15:44,040 Speaker 1: Dr a pirate he was, but this is the fat 263 00:15:44,160 --> 00:15:48,520 Speaker 1: New Orleans musician he was. Why would you do that 264 00:15:48,640 --> 00:15:52,880 Speaker 1: to Dr John? He's a national treasure and the medicine man. Yeah, 265 00:15:52,960 --> 00:15:57,240 Speaker 1: but fantastic. We all agree with music is fantastic, but 266 00:15:58,320 --> 00:16:00,160 Speaker 1: you know he wanted to venture off into something and 267 00:16:00,200 --> 00:16:02,920 Speaker 1: decided to be Come up, Reggie, can I see my office? 268 00:16:03,040 --> 00:16:05,880 Speaker 1: Of course? Yeah? Can you send those facts is over? 269 00:16:06,000 --> 00:16:10,760 Speaker 1: I don't know how the machine works, Reggie, Well, what 270 00:16:10,840 --> 00:16:12,640 Speaker 1: was that? No? I just guy said the facts is 271 00:16:12,680 --> 00:16:15,360 Speaker 1: over right. But it seems kind of half half. You know, 272 00:16:15,440 --> 00:16:17,960 Speaker 1: she had a question and you just kind of look 273 00:16:17,960 --> 00:16:19,920 Speaker 1: at it. She'll figure it up. I I work in 274 00:16:19,920 --> 00:16:24,320 Speaker 1: the resource room. I don't know how this facts machine works. 275 00:16:25,200 --> 00:16:26,840 Speaker 1: You've given me all these papers. I don't know what. 276 00:16:27,120 --> 00:16:29,680 Speaker 1: Reggie explained why I'm here again, I don't even know 277 00:16:29,720 --> 00:16:33,040 Speaker 1: what I did. Look, look, look, I love that chicken 278 00:16:33,120 --> 00:16:40,480 Speaker 1: from back back. Oh man, it's always so good. So well, 279 00:16:40,560 --> 00:16:42,680 Speaker 1: right now I'm in the wrong place, in the wrong 280 00:16:44,480 --> 00:16:47,920 Speaker 1: just want to be around him. So he did do 281 00:16:47,960 --> 00:16:51,320 Speaker 1: the pompeyes apps. Yeah, that was me. Can you just 282 00:16:51,320 --> 00:16:55,440 Speaker 1: just facts whatever you can? She does. She's saying, she's 283 00:16:55,480 --> 00:16:57,400 Speaker 1: telling you straight up, I don't know how the facts 284 00:16:57,440 --> 00:17:02,160 Speaker 1: machine works. Your response is just accent. Yeah, okay, So 285 00:17:02,200 --> 00:17:04,920 Speaker 1: I got the minutes from the meeting at the school, 286 00:17:05,560 --> 00:17:08,119 Speaker 1: and you started it by saying you wanted to have 287 00:17:08,160 --> 00:17:12,080 Speaker 1: a tribunal for Dr John. Yes, so we brought Dr 288 00:17:12,160 --> 00:17:14,560 Speaker 1: John in this morning to see if you could answer 289 00:17:14,640 --> 00:17:18,119 Speaker 1: his questions as to why you wanted I got so 290 00:17:18,160 --> 00:17:25,520 Speaker 1: many quest Jones. You are so question number one Dr John. Uh. 291 00:17:25,720 --> 00:17:30,879 Speaker 1: First of all, look, when an elementary school tribunal says 292 00:17:31,040 --> 00:17:34,320 Speaker 1: that Dr John is going to be tried, Dr John 293 00:17:34,400 --> 00:17:38,120 Speaker 1: shows up. Okay, I'm true to my word. Says it's 294 00:17:38,119 --> 00:17:40,879 Speaker 1: not connected to the wireless. It's fine, just connected to 295 00:17:41,960 --> 00:17:46,480 Speaker 1: I don't have a hotspot. Yeah, I'm trying to tax 296 00:17:46,560 --> 00:17:48,399 Speaker 1: something and I don't know how what I'm doing. I 297 00:17:48,400 --> 00:17:51,159 Speaker 1: don't know how. It says not will not connect to network. Okay, 298 00:17:51,200 --> 00:17:53,200 Speaker 1: do you have a different line for the facts or 299 00:17:54,680 --> 00:17:59,080 Speaker 1: I don't work? Look, I know this is important thing 300 00:17:59,240 --> 00:18:10,399 Speaker 1: we got Dr John. Thank you. I'm hungry. Look if 301 00:18:10,440 --> 00:18:12,760 Speaker 1: Dr John knows two things, he knows pianos and he 302 00:18:12,800 --> 00:18:16,000 Speaker 1: knows facts machines. Can I check what a third thing 303 00:18:16,040 --> 00:18:19,160 Speaker 1: you know might be? Can you are you a fan 304 00:18:19,240 --> 00:18:26,080 Speaker 1: of Richard Marks? Who is that again? That mean dictator? Oh? Yes, 305 00:18:26,480 --> 00:18:34,679 Speaker 1: that's right, Richard Marks. Why don't you fix the machine now? Kendall, 306 00:18:36,280 --> 00:18:40,360 Speaker 1: we've got ambitious with how you're running the school meetings. Right. 307 00:18:40,400 --> 00:18:43,440 Speaker 1: The parents come in. They want to know about their children, 308 00:18:43,560 --> 00:18:46,119 Speaker 1: the well being of their children, and you want to 309 00:18:46,160 --> 00:18:50,639 Speaker 1: try Dr John. So what's going on, what's going on 310 00:18:50,680 --> 00:18:54,960 Speaker 1: at home? You can love it with me. Just come clean. 311 00:18:56,600 --> 00:18:59,359 Speaker 1: Whatever it is, it doesn't matter to me. I'm not 312 00:18:59,440 --> 00:19:03,200 Speaker 1: here to Joe. I'm here to find solutions. I think 313 00:19:04,400 --> 00:19:08,040 Speaker 1: it's okay. I just said I think put up your heart. 314 00:19:09,960 --> 00:19:14,360 Speaker 1: I think that ever comes out, I I just I'm 315 00:19:14,359 --> 00:19:17,399 Speaker 1: not comfortable talking about it. I canna be honest. Okay, 316 00:19:17,680 --> 00:19:20,520 Speaker 1: I think about that. I think, what do you think? 317 00:19:21,920 --> 00:19:24,320 Speaker 1: I think if you describe how you were feeling, what 318 00:19:24,800 --> 00:19:27,520 Speaker 1: would I think? Most of my family are hot dogs? 319 00:19:28,960 --> 00:19:33,239 Speaker 1: So how did you get to understand some Look, I 320 00:19:33,280 --> 00:19:37,960 Speaker 1: have a new adapter to doing technology, so renaissance man. 321 00:19:38,160 --> 00:19:41,760 Speaker 1: There's nothing more fascinating then be able to send people 322 00:19:42,520 --> 00:19:47,159 Speaker 1: to somebody else. Absolutely, I've said it so many times. Okay, well, 323 00:19:47,160 --> 00:19:49,080 Speaker 1: I see the problem is down hooked up back here. 324 00:19:49,240 --> 00:19:54,720 Speaker 1: Oh my gosh, it in. I should take you out 325 00:19:54,760 --> 00:19:57,639 Speaker 1: for some Gama. I would love that. Look. I know 326 00:19:57,760 --> 00:20:00,840 Speaker 1: we are not in Louisiana right now, and I know 327 00:20:00,920 --> 00:20:03,160 Speaker 1: the good job a lot of places in every town 328 00:20:04,240 --> 00:20:07,240 Speaker 1: because I've been looking for the last four years. Okay, 329 00:20:07,280 --> 00:20:09,480 Speaker 1: there's a plate. You gotta go around the back. There's 330 00:20:09,520 --> 00:20:13,120 Speaker 1: not a sign. You gotta ask for Curtis. Okay, kitas, 331 00:20:13,359 --> 00:20:17,880 Speaker 1: you gotta ask for quitas. Alright, somebody asked for koitas. 332 00:20:18,960 --> 00:20:22,560 Speaker 1: Uh you know me, man, it's back with ban Let 333 00:20:22,560 --> 00:20:28,240 Speaker 1: me get down there. Give you some quitters. Huh. Okay, 334 00:20:28,440 --> 00:20:35,360 Speaker 1: you've got to have sex with Curtis. Second. Tell you what, 335 00:20:37,520 --> 00:20:43,520 Speaker 1: I'll take this one. I'll neave this one for the team. Alright, alright, 336 00:20:43,600 --> 00:20:45,960 Speaker 1: he's worth it. It's worth it. Not a restaurant at all. 337 00:20:46,119 --> 00:20:48,879 Speaker 1: It's not a restaurant. No, it's just you go to 338 00:20:48,920 --> 00:20:51,280 Speaker 1: Curtis's house, have sex with him, and he'll make you jump. 339 00:20:51,760 --> 00:20:55,400 Speaker 1: Would you like a pot of m a thank you? Yes, 340 00:20:55,520 --> 00:20:58,400 Speaker 1: I'm absolutely sure. I'm gonna make my own self one. 341 00:20:58,480 --> 00:21:02,959 Speaker 1: Are you a doctor at all? I have? I actually 342 00:21:03,000 --> 00:21:07,240 Speaker 1: do have a doctor, right doctor, But I'm not like 343 00:21:07,280 --> 00:21:13,800 Speaker 1: a medical doctor. John first, patient is ready? Now? Okay, 344 00:21:13,960 --> 00:21:18,199 Speaker 1: all right, here we go. What seems to be the trouble. 345 00:21:18,400 --> 00:21:23,160 Speaker 1: It's just to have a hard time breathing. Stand up quick. 346 00:21:24,520 --> 00:21:26,800 Speaker 1: Oh I just did a show last night. I was 347 00:21:26,880 --> 00:21:34,000 Speaker 1: sweating beside. What what what did you say? I said, 348 00:21:34,040 --> 00:21:36,800 Speaker 1: I did a show last night in Shreveport, and I 349 00:21:36,840 --> 00:21:41,920 Speaker 1: was sweating like crazy talking about I'm dying. I think 350 00:21:41,960 --> 00:21:45,640 Speaker 1: I'm dying too. I think I'm actually dead to be Please, 351 00:21:46,960 --> 00:21:49,480 Speaker 1: can get go to doctor out of here and get 352 00:21:49,520 --> 00:21:53,040 Speaker 1: me a real okay doctor? Do you need anything? Yeah? 353 00:21:53,520 --> 00:21:56,560 Speaker 1: I think this pageent needs a mail? Okay? Can we 354 00:21:56,720 --> 00:21:59,719 Speaker 1: can we send the facts? Can we? I don't know 355 00:21:59,720 --> 00:22:02,480 Speaker 1: how to let's see. Okay, Well no, I can help 356 00:22:02,480 --> 00:22:04,840 Speaker 1: with that. Man, I can help with We're going to 357 00:22:04,920 --> 00:22:07,360 Speaker 1: fact the real doctor and we're going to get right 358 00:22:07,400 --> 00:22:17,520 Speaker 1: back to you. Suggestions to alchemy This dot com see 359 00:22:17,600 --> 00:22:20,160 Speaker 1: number two comes to us from Thomas, who wrote, good 360 00:22:20,200 --> 00:22:23,240 Speaker 1: Morning Alchemists. I want to start by saying this podcast 361 00:22:23,320 --> 00:22:25,480 Speaker 1: is great. I couldn't think of anything more original to 362 00:22:25,760 --> 00:22:29,520 Speaker 1: start off with that did not involve James c oh 363 00:22:29,560 --> 00:22:32,920 Speaker 1: I see, he wanted to greet us, and he wanted 364 00:22:32,920 --> 00:22:35,480 Speaker 1: to involve you, and couldn't come up with anything more. Really, 365 00:22:35,520 --> 00:22:39,439 Speaker 1: don't damn it. Anyways, my suggestion is an exaggerated backstory 366 00:22:39,440 --> 00:22:43,800 Speaker 1: of Alchemy This and how Kevin recruited you all. Thanks again, Thomas, Joey, 367 00:22:43,800 --> 00:22:46,840 Speaker 1: why don't you come on in? Yeah, thanks for coming 368 00:22:46,840 --> 00:22:51,959 Speaker 1: in today. Man, sure, just in a second. Uh wow, 369 00:22:52,240 --> 00:22:55,080 Speaker 1: So you've been working out, Yeah, it's kind of you 370 00:22:55,160 --> 00:22:57,000 Speaker 1: belong to a gym. Yeah, it's just be kind of 371 00:22:57,000 --> 00:22:59,479 Speaker 1: sick though. You haven't been feeling well. No, I mean, 372 00:23:00,160 --> 00:23:03,159 Speaker 1: let me just dake your temperature. Do you mind if 373 00:23:03,160 --> 00:23:07,199 Speaker 1: we do this or only? Sure? All right? Uh? Just 374 00:23:08,400 --> 00:23:17,280 Speaker 1: too too much? Okay, let me get that out of there. 375 00:23:18,720 --> 00:23:23,440 Speaker 1: Is this the right room? Hey? Show? Is that it? Yeah? 376 00:23:23,520 --> 00:23:27,119 Speaker 1: He's not feeling well. It's easy desert. Yeah, you look bad. 377 00:23:30,240 --> 00:23:34,920 Speaker 1: There's coffee and waters and stuff. Oh okay, so we 378 00:23:34,960 --> 00:23:36,919 Speaker 1: have to pay for so no, no, everything's on the 379 00:23:36,920 --> 00:23:43,360 Speaker 1: house sends up with knuckle head. Here his dad looks 380 00:23:43,400 --> 00:23:47,359 Speaker 1: like a knuckle. Yeah, what's up? The bath looks like 381 00:23:47,359 --> 00:23:50,280 Speaker 1: a big knuckle and his face looks like a thumb. 382 00:23:50,400 --> 00:23:55,919 Speaker 1: Joey Um, I have two questions for you. Yeah, please 383 00:23:56,040 --> 00:24:04,520 Speaker 1: enjoy Joey. Question number one Wednesday. Uh huh m, that's 384 00:24:04,520 --> 00:24:07,919 Speaker 1: all you're gonna it's the day. It's it's from the 385 00:24:08,040 --> 00:24:17,959 Speaker 1: Viking calendar. It comes from wed Miss, the god of grass. Okay, 386 00:24:18,000 --> 00:24:21,520 Speaker 1: we're looking for some improv though, but some something you 387 00:24:21,600 --> 00:24:24,320 Speaker 1: read in the book. For one more question at you 388 00:24:24,400 --> 00:24:30,320 Speaker 1: get milk. If you have it, I'll do all the 389 00:24:30,359 --> 00:24:33,440 Speaker 1: milk you got, okay, please, all right, we'll see I've 390 00:24:33,440 --> 00:24:39,400 Speaker 1: really enjoyed you embarrass supply Westie Comedy Theater and uh 391 00:24:39,560 --> 00:24:46,320 Speaker 1: also pretty pretty pony you're well yeah that's July. You're 392 00:24:46,320 --> 00:24:48,879 Speaker 1: gonna eat that cake and on stage you're so fast 393 00:24:48,920 --> 00:24:52,800 Speaker 1: and fearless, and uh, I just wanted to there's just 394 00:24:52,880 --> 00:24:58,000 Speaker 1: peanut butter cake. Yeah it is peanut butter cake. Now 395 00:24:58,119 --> 00:25:03,560 Speaker 1: you shouldn't eat it? Behoover? You should? You sick? Can 396 00:25:03,640 --> 00:25:06,879 Speaker 1: I get you anything? You said you have milk? You 397 00:25:06,920 --> 00:25:09,040 Speaker 1: know what? Uh? Would you mind if I made an 398 00:25:09,040 --> 00:25:16,480 Speaker 1: appointment for you with Dr John's? That's okay? How can 399 00:25:16,520 --> 00:25:22,080 Speaker 1: I help you? Sick? I guys apparently being groomed. And 400 00:25:22,200 --> 00:25:25,560 Speaker 1: wait a minute? You you Joe Agraham? You Joe you 401 00:25:25,600 --> 00:25:29,720 Speaker 1: can Joe A. Graham from from the Wedside Comedy Theater. Yeah, hey, 402 00:25:29,800 --> 00:25:34,040 Speaker 1: you funny? You should be on a podcast. I think so. 403 00:25:34,240 --> 00:25:36,000 Speaker 1: Let's have been told that they should have a face 404 00:25:36,080 --> 00:25:43,040 Speaker 1: for podcast. That's funny. That's funny. Now did you write 405 00:25:43,080 --> 00:25:44,960 Speaker 1: this stuff? And you're just rolling with it off the 406 00:25:44,960 --> 00:25:49,440 Speaker 1: top of your head as you go along? Okay, now 407 00:25:50,040 --> 00:25:54,320 Speaker 1: with all these facts seasons here. Look, I have I 408 00:25:54,320 --> 00:25:57,760 Speaker 1: have a fact line ever specialist in the country, So 409 00:25:58,160 --> 00:26:02,240 Speaker 1: you know, once we detoy man, what is wrong with you? 410 00:26:03,119 --> 00:26:05,560 Speaker 1: I'm going to fax the doctor and get you an answer. 411 00:26:05,600 --> 00:26:08,320 Speaker 1: I gotta I gotta do this thing with Covin. I 412 00:26:08,359 --> 00:26:11,840 Speaker 1: don't know what it is. Kevin Pilot huh oh man? 413 00:26:12,359 --> 00:26:17,760 Speaker 1: Is he still working? Yeah? That's him on a double 414 00:26:17,800 --> 00:26:22,840 Speaker 1: bill with winter Marks around nineteen eighty nine. It was 415 00:26:24,200 --> 00:26:28,280 Speaker 1: who was written to Mom? Right here waiting? Don't mean nothing? 416 00:26:30,400 --> 00:26:36,280 Speaker 1: Oh the Communist Manifesto. Thanks for having me in, Kevin James, 417 00:26:36,320 --> 00:26:40,679 Speaker 1: it's so great to see you about. Well, the deal is, 418 00:26:40,800 --> 00:26:44,120 Speaker 1: it's no come on, buddy, I want you to join 419 00:26:44,160 --> 00:26:48,920 Speaker 1: a new team. Team. Yeah. So you enjoy doing improv. 420 00:26:49,280 --> 00:26:51,840 Speaker 1: I've seen you many times, you running around the stage 421 00:26:51,880 --> 00:26:54,280 Speaker 1: like a crazy person, and you're always funny and so sorry, 422 00:26:54,880 --> 00:26:58,640 Speaker 1: do you mind if I finish this cake? I know 423 00:26:58,440 --> 00:27:03,399 Speaker 1: I don't see yours? Uh it was now it's your anything, right, 424 00:27:03,520 --> 00:27:07,160 Speaker 1: I'm not good? Thank you? Yeah? Sure. So as much 425 00:27:07,160 --> 00:27:09,600 Speaker 1: as you enjoy running around doing improv, I'm wondering if 426 00:27:09,600 --> 00:27:13,360 Speaker 1: you could sit at a table and also do improv. 427 00:27:14,119 --> 00:27:17,199 Speaker 1: I'll seat at a table with a big microphone in 428 00:27:17,240 --> 00:27:23,320 Speaker 1: your face and headphones. Think you drink? Yeah, there's some milk? 429 00:27:23,520 --> 00:27:28,280 Speaker 1: Would you like some milk with that? Vanessa? Vanessa? Hi, 430 00:27:30,359 --> 00:27:36,159 Speaker 1: we met just really thirsty Kevin. Did you see that? Yeah? That? 431 00:27:36,840 --> 00:27:41,000 Speaker 1: Why did you you've met me? Of course? Sure? You 432 00:27:41,000 --> 00:27:47,400 Speaker 1: look like you don't even recognize me. Mr. Mr polic 433 00:27:47,440 --> 00:27:50,960 Speaker 1: Sorry interrupt, Chris Alvarado's here, all right? Well you know what? 434 00:27:51,080 --> 00:27:53,600 Speaker 1: Could you two figure out the liquid issue? And whether 435 00:27:53,640 --> 00:27:56,040 Speaker 1: you know? I think what we need to figure out 436 00:27:56,080 --> 00:27:58,040 Speaker 1: is why he's coming in with an attitude. I don't 437 00:27:58,080 --> 00:28:02,159 Speaker 1: mean to. I'm just really thirsty. Even you're thirsty, and 438 00:28:02,200 --> 00:28:07,000 Speaker 1: that allows you to forget who Vanessa? Thank you? Thank you. Ken. 439 00:28:08,160 --> 00:28:11,359 Speaker 1: I'm gonna need to know you guys can play together, Queen. 440 00:28:11,400 --> 00:28:15,200 Speaker 1: I don't want to work with him. I don't blame you, Vanessa, James, 441 00:28:15,600 --> 00:28:17,159 Speaker 1: it's not gonna work out. I want to go out 442 00:28:17,240 --> 00:28:20,080 Speaker 1: some more coffee right this way. Mr Alvarado? Did you 443 00:28:20,119 --> 00:28:22,480 Speaker 1: park in a lot? Do you need validation? No? I'm fine, 444 00:28:22,480 --> 00:28:26,840 Speaker 1: I'm good. Thank you. Wow, you were in really good shape. Thanks? Yeah? 445 00:28:27,359 --> 00:28:29,439 Speaker 1: Did you work out already today? I did? Yeah? I 446 00:28:29,440 --> 00:28:33,720 Speaker 1: can't help it? God? Did you No? No, that's not me. 447 00:28:34,320 --> 00:28:38,720 Speaker 1: I think it's you. Know, it's definitely not me. It's okay. 448 00:28:38,720 --> 00:28:41,360 Speaker 1: If it's you, it's all right. Can I get you 449 00:28:41,400 --> 00:28:46,080 Speaker 1: something to drink? Yeah? Maybe, No, that's not me, that's 450 00:28:46,120 --> 00:28:50,080 Speaker 1: definitely you. I think it's you. Okay. Now, Kevin's office 451 00:28:50,120 --> 00:28:52,600 Speaker 1: at the end of this long, long haul. So we're 452 00:28:52,640 --> 00:28:55,000 Speaker 1: just gonna keep walking down. Hey, do me a favor, 453 00:28:55,040 --> 00:28:58,440 Speaker 1: just plug it up. No, look, what did you eat? 454 00:28:58,920 --> 00:29:00,880 Speaker 1: By the way, I have a steady diet of kale 455 00:29:01,120 --> 00:29:07,080 Speaker 1: water and getting it on. Okay, Like that's that's why 456 00:29:07,240 --> 00:29:10,680 Speaker 1: you're you're eating to kale. Okay, I don't know. I 457 00:29:10,720 --> 00:29:17,360 Speaker 1: think you gotta plug that up. All right. I'm gonna 458 00:29:17,360 --> 00:29:19,719 Speaker 1: get you something bubbly, okay. I don't know if that's 459 00:29:19,760 --> 00:29:25,440 Speaker 1: gonna help anything. That is terrible. You're just propelling yourself 460 00:29:25,480 --> 00:29:30,000 Speaker 1: down the hall a little more. Okay, I'm gonna leave 461 00:29:30,000 --> 00:29:37,200 Speaker 1: you here. It's that door wretch up. Catch yep, Hey, Chris, 462 00:29:37,520 --> 00:29:39,840 Speaker 1: are you hey, buddy? Thanks you so much for coming in. 463 00:29:39,880 --> 00:29:45,800 Speaker 1: Happy to be here. Um, listen, what's that you It 464 00:29:45,920 --> 00:29:49,760 Speaker 1: might have been Gosh, I'm a little gassy lately. I'm 465 00:29:49,800 --> 00:29:52,680 Speaker 1: so sorry. Uh. Sometimes they don't smell bad. They kind 466 00:29:52,680 --> 00:29:56,960 Speaker 1: of smell nice, yeah, like Lilac. You ever had a 467 00:29:57,040 --> 00:30:00,120 Speaker 1: fart smell like Lilac? Oh? Yeah? Yeah? Yeah. So let 468 00:30:00,120 --> 00:30:03,040 Speaker 1: me ask you how you feel about James Heeney. I 469 00:30:03,080 --> 00:30:09,520 Speaker 1: don't know. Okay, what about Craig Atkowski love him? Yeah? 470 00:30:10,000 --> 00:30:15,560 Speaker 1: Well he had a few questions for you. Craig did, yes, yeah, 471 00:30:15,600 --> 00:30:17,800 Speaker 1: he had a couple of quicks. I recorded them, all right, 472 00:30:17,800 --> 00:30:21,400 Speaker 1: all right, so let me just play this back. Okay, Craig, 473 00:30:21,400 --> 00:30:23,320 Speaker 1: when you're ready. Here a question for Chris. Are you 474 00:30:23,320 --> 00:30:26,760 Speaker 1: gonna fucking initiate every scene? Okay? This is Craig by 475 00:30:26,760 --> 00:30:33,040 Speaker 1: the way. So that was Craig's first question there was 476 00:30:33,080 --> 00:30:38,240 Speaker 1: that you yes, yes, yes, and I wish you'd s good, 477 00:30:38,520 --> 00:30:42,760 Speaker 1: very good. H I'll do it. I don't think it 478 00:30:42,840 --> 00:30:48,520 Speaker 1: was a request. I think it was sort of cutting 479 00:30:48,520 --> 00:30:53,200 Speaker 1: it off at the past. That I think I got 480 00:30:53,200 --> 00:31:00,000 Speaker 1: Anya is that you. It's what me did you get yourself? 481 00:31:00,760 --> 00:31:05,840 Speaker 1: Holy ship, Chris. This is Craig again. Also, this is 482 00:31:05,840 --> 00:31:07,680 Speaker 1: gonna be a long term commitment. So I just want 483 00:31:07,680 --> 00:31:09,080 Speaker 1: to know that you're gonna be in town for a 484 00:31:09,120 --> 00:31:12,280 Speaker 1: while and able to do as many episodes as possible. 485 00:31:12,400 --> 00:31:14,600 Speaker 1: This is Craig. Yeah, I promise not to miss a one. 486 00:31:15,280 --> 00:31:18,880 Speaker 1: All right, so i'll I've recorded your answers. I'll send 487 00:31:18,920 --> 00:31:25,360 Speaker 1: those over to Craig. Hey, Chris, great, you look great. Thanks? Thanks? 488 00:31:25,360 --> 00:31:30,080 Speaker 1: So do you was that you? I don't know. I 489 00:31:30,120 --> 00:31:32,400 Speaker 1: don't know if it was, Hey, Chris, Craig. Here third 490 00:31:32,440 --> 00:31:35,560 Speaker 1: prerecorded question. I just want to know if you're farting 491 00:31:35,640 --> 00:31:41,200 Speaker 1: right now? I can I can definitely say no. I 492 00:31:41,240 --> 00:31:46,120 Speaker 1: don't know what. I don't know what's happening, Craig, Baby, 493 00:31:46,200 --> 00:31:49,120 Speaker 1: listen to me. I got a gig. You're gonna love it. Okay, 494 00:31:49,160 --> 00:31:51,120 Speaker 1: what is it? Morty? Look? Look look, look, look, look 495 00:31:51,120 --> 00:31:54,800 Speaker 1: look look look look you're a funny guy, right, yes, yes, 496 00:31:55,000 --> 00:31:57,600 Speaker 1: I love it. You like to do fun stuff, right? 497 00:31:57,760 --> 00:32:03,120 Speaker 1: What about me? Carla? Carla, just stop. I'm jumping on 498 00:32:03,160 --> 00:32:06,480 Speaker 1: the phone. Can't jumping in to get a handle on this. 499 00:32:06,600 --> 00:32:08,360 Speaker 1: I'm trying to get a handle on her, but she's 500 00:32:08,360 --> 00:32:12,080 Speaker 1: a loose canady. If you don't get me in on 501 00:32:12,200 --> 00:32:17,000 Speaker 1: that hot recording, there's no way Elorado is committed. It's 502 00:32:17,160 --> 00:32:20,280 Speaker 1: never gonna be a slot open. Come on, look, I 503 00:32:20,360 --> 00:32:22,720 Speaker 1: need to commit from you. Okay, I don't know, Morty. 504 00:32:22,760 --> 00:32:25,440 Speaker 1: What's the pay? The pay? Right now, top dollar two 505 00:32:25,880 --> 00:32:33,360 Speaker 1: million in episode. If Carla jumps on nothing, you hear me, 506 00:32:33,680 --> 00:32:37,000 Speaker 1: guarantee nothing. I don't know. I love my wife. What 507 00:32:37,040 --> 00:32:40,000 Speaker 1: am I going to do two hundred mill if it's 508 00:32:40,080 --> 00:32:43,000 Speaker 1: just me? Hey, Craig and Vanesa, thank you guys so 509 00:32:43,080 --> 00:32:46,080 Speaker 1: much for coming in. I just have questions about well, 510 00:32:46,120 --> 00:32:50,320 Speaker 1: I think you know what's coming. Joey Greer is the smell, 511 00:32:51,120 --> 00:32:54,440 Speaker 1: and I'm just wondering if you guys have any suggestions 512 00:32:54,480 --> 00:32:58,680 Speaker 1: about how we can. I don't know what the word is, uninvite. 513 00:32:58,960 --> 00:33:04,840 Speaker 1: Someone needs to earned me. So Joey's dying, I don't understand. 514 00:33:04,920 --> 00:33:07,480 Speaker 1: That would be great if that were the case. But 515 00:33:08,160 --> 00:33:09,880 Speaker 1: why did you ask him? He's very much. I mean 516 00:33:10,240 --> 00:33:13,400 Speaker 1: it's your thing. I don't care. People make mistakes. I 517 00:33:13,440 --> 00:33:18,360 Speaker 1: thought he was funny and then I hadn't met him, like, 518 00:33:18,400 --> 00:33:21,880 Speaker 1: oh yeah, man, red flags everywhere. Well, my wife Carl 519 00:33:22,000 --> 00:33:26,040 Speaker 1: is definitely available. I love her. Yeah, please ask her 520 00:33:26,080 --> 00:33:29,680 Speaker 1: to join us. But again, I need to remove like 521 00:33:30,240 --> 00:33:32,920 Speaker 1: like a kidney stone. I gotta get this guy out 522 00:33:32,920 --> 00:33:36,960 Speaker 1: of my Just tell him. I'm sorry to interrupted as 523 00:33:37,560 --> 00:33:41,160 Speaker 1: Mr Pollock. Yeah, Hi, I'm Tim Haffer. I'm part of 524 00:33:41,160 --> 00:33:44,120 Speaker 1: Make a Wish Foundation, Tim and uh, I don't know 525 00:33:44,680 --> 00:33:48,960 Speaker 1: you're familiar with Mr. Hello, let's see what's coming. I 526 00:33:48,960 --> 00:33:54,240 Speaker 1: see what's coming. Who is this? I'm James. Don't worry 527 00:33:54,240 --> 00:33:56,720 Speaker 1: about him. Don't worry about him. Does he have to 528 00:33:56,760 --> 00:34:01,960 Speaker 1: be here? Well, that's a great question. Okay, we met before. Yeah, 529 00:34:02,240 --> 00:34:06,560 Speaker 1: I do a lot of stuff with Make a Wish kids. Yeah, James, Look, 530 00:34:06,720 --> 00:34:10,840 Speaker 1: I appreciate you pitching in and thank you and wanting 531 00:34:10,880 --> 00:34:12,440 Speaker 1: to be a part of the team. It means a 532 00:34:12,440 --> 00:34:15,719 Speaker 1: world to me. I think in situations like this you 533 00:34:15,800 --> 00:34:18,400 Speaker 1: have to just look at Joey and say, stop with 534 00:34:18,440 --> 00:34:26,080 Speaker 1: the characters. Make a Wish character? No, really good? Oh 535 00:34:26,120 --> 00:34:29,200 Speaker 1: my god, I didn't even really incredible, Like when he's 536 00:34:29,280 --> 00:34:33,719 Speaker 1: not performing, like he's a he's a mess on the 537 00:34:33,760 --> 00:34:38,080 Speaker 1: floor like believes. But then he comes to life when 538 00:34:38,120 --> 00:34:45,160 Speaker 1: he's in character, is my point. And that's sorry. That's cool, man. 539 00:34:45,360 --> 00:34:49,320 Speaker 1: I mean we need you. I meant no, that's you. 540 00:34:49,320 --> 00:34:55,040 Speaker 1: You've been starting NonStop for years now, great improviser. Uh, 541 00:34:55,280 --> 00:34:58,160 Speaker 1: what is Joey? What is Joey drinking? I think that's 542 00:34:58,200 --> 00:35:04,200 Speaker 1: com I can't make more specifically, how do you know 543 00:35:04,719 --> 00:35:06,880 Speaker 1: we're looking at because it's what he wrote on the 544 00:35:06,920 --> 00:35:15,680 Speaker 1: firmness Okay it says my own I can't make more guys. 545 00:35:15,719 --> 00:35:18,880 Speaker 1: Come on, drink what you have? Who are you? I'm James. 546 00:35:18,960 --> 00:35:23,800 Speaker 1: He listen. Oh yeah, Valerie, you're going to call me Valerie. 547 00:35:24,600 --> 00:35:28,520 Speaker 1: We're gonna call me val Okay, maybe I was Okay, 548 00:35:28,560 --> 00:35:30,359 Speaker 1: I'm sorry, but now we're getting to know each other 549 00:35:30,360 --> 00:35:32,520 Speaker 1: a lot better, now that you're seeing the sight of me. 550 00:35:33,080 --> 00:35:36,279 Speaker 1: It's really James. Follow up question please? Yeah, if you're 551 00:35:36,320 --> 00:35:38,279 Speaker 1: able to join the group at some point, can you 552 00:35:38,360 --> 00:35:42,680 Speaker 1: bring like some green screen Absolutely? Yeah, I get. I 553 00:35:42,680 --> 00:35:47,000 Speaker 1: mean as long as I'll get Chris Avocado, get Greg, 554 00:35:47,040 --> 00:35:49,200 Speaker 1: we'll all get together in front of green screen something. 555 00:35:50,520 --> 00:35:53,200 Speaker 1: I mean, we're going to be a team. That's what's important. 556 00:35:53,560 --> 00:35:55,560 Speaker 1: What do you do with Make a Wish? Kid? I 557 00:35:56,320 --> 00:35:59,160 Speaker 1: you know, I usually it's just me going in and 558 00:35:59,200 --> 00:36:03,080 Speaker 1: surprising them and they're so that's how it works. You 559 00:36:03,160 --> 00:36:05,560 Speaker 1: just go in. They don't have to record. You're you're 560 00:36:05,560 --> 00:36:08,640 Speaker 1: here to see Tyler, anybody that's sick today. I just 561 00:36:08,680 --> 00:36:12,080 Speaker 1: want to do you. Are you part of the no? No, 562 00:36:12,160 --> 00:36:16,480 Speaker 1: I'm part of the Make a Wish? Oh fantastic. Tyler 563 00:36:16,520 --> 00:36:20,080 Speaker 1: wanted to see Superman Okay, cool, but he's right in here. 564 00:36:20,160 --> 00:36:27,000 Speaker 1: All right, Tyler? Hey, are your Superman? No, I'm James Heeney. 565 00:36:27,160 --> 00:36:34,279 Speaker 1: What James Tyler? Tyler? So get a doctor in here. 566 00:36:34,480 --> 00:36:40,440 Speaker 1: You're supposed to be Superman doctor with this kid. Oh 567 00:36:40,480 --> 00:36:43,880 Speaker 1: my god, Oh no, this kid is fucked. Oh no, 568 00:36:44,280 --> 00:36:48,000 Speaker 1: oh this is terrible. I can't get this fax machine working. Okay, 569 00:36:48,200 --> 00:36:51,480 Speaker 1: come on, are there any other Are there any other kids? 570 00:36:51,520 --> 00:36:54,080 Speaker 1: Didn't there any of their kids? You know? I just 571 00:36:54,080 --> 00:36:56,719 Speaker 1: wanted to do a good day. We gotta rat something 572 00:36:56,719 --> 00:36:58,480 Speaker 1: that don't payball, and then we're going to fax it 573 00:36:58,680 --> 00:37:01,520 Speaker 1: to a specialist. How won't we just take a picture 574 00:37:01,520 --> 00:37:05,400 Speaker 1: of the paper and texted to them? Okay, all right, 575 00:37:06,000 --> 00:37:09,320 Speaker 1: before we kill another kid. Well, let's go to see 576 00:37:09,320 --> 00:37:17,759 Speaker 1: three please. Our final scene comes from Robert, who rode 577 00:37:17,840 --> 00:37:21,919 Speaker 1: High Kevin and Alchemists. I grew up in Laporte, Indiana. 578 00:37:22,360 --> 00:37:25,520 Speaker 1: There isn't much unique about report other than our high 579 00:37:25,520 --> 00:37:30,560 Speaker 1: school had a very odd mascot. We were the Slicers. 580 00:37:35,960 --> 00:37:42,640 Speaker 1: Is there a pure photographs e mail of some sort 581 00:37:42,680 --> 00:37:50,000 Speaker 1: of blade, But it's slices. You heard me write the Slicers. 582 00:37:50,000 --> 00:37:52,239 Speaker 1: I would love to hear your take on the committee 583 00:37:52,239 --> 00:37:55,160 Speaker 1: meeting where it was decided that the slicer was the 584 00:37:55,200 --> 00:38:01,200 Speaker 1: option best for the school. Robert, All right, let's hear 585 00:38:01,400 --> 00:38:04,440 Speaker 1: the next suggestion. Please, if we can just step up 586 00:38:04,440 --> 00:38:09,360 Speaker 1: to the microphones, we can hear your suggestion. Yeah, a 587 00:38:09,400 --> 00:38:15,319 Speaker 1: microphone works. You state your name, well, your name, my 588 00:38:15,440 --> 00:38:20,920 Speaker 1: name is Kerm. Yeah come no, Kerm, I hound you come. 589 00:38:21,040 --> 00:38:25,600 Speaker 1: Now let's get to your suggestion. Well, uh by spell 590 00:38:25,760 --> 00:38:34,080 Speaker 1: come k e am come ah m? Yeah am like Mary? Yes, 591 00:38:34,960 --> 00:38:41,600 Speaker 1: are like Randy? Yes? All right, now catch you yes, 592 00:38:43,040 --> 00:38:52,080 Speaker 1: what's the like Ejackie litt? Now they have had all 593 00:38:52,200 --> 00:38:57,480 Speaker 1: ideas for what we can be. That's God, all right, 594 00:38:58,280 --> 00:39:02,400 Speaker 1: I am and I I thought that we we could be. 595 00:39:03,040 --> 00:39:08,600 Speaker 1: I'm sorry, come with me. Now, what what next? What? Please? 596 00:39:08,640 --> 00:39:17,680 Speaker 1: Stand by to the microphone station. Name Bobo? How many 597 00:39:17,800 --> 00:39:24,400 Speaker 1: bees in that bio? Bio? All right, Bubbobo? No, it's Bubbo. 598 00:39:24,520 --> 00:39:28,800 Speaker 1: It's how my parents called me. Nine bible. Uh so 599 00:39:29,200 --> 00:39:33,600 Speaker 1: I'm considering the yogurt chokers. Say again, the yogurt chokers. 600 00:39:33,840 --> 00:39:37,960 Speaker 1: It sounds like you're saying the yoga chokers. The yogurt chokers. 601 00:39:37,960 --> 00:39:42,120 Speaker 1: You gotta write, and what is a yoga choker? Well, 602 00:39:42,160 --> 00:39:45,240 Speaker 1: it's when it's choked. It's it's yogurt. It's a yogurt 603 00:39:45,320 --> 00:39:50,439 Speaker 1: choker when it is choked. Is that what you say 604 00:39:50,520 --> 00:39:56,600 Speaker 1: is right? Uh? Am I to imagine what it is? 605 00:39:56,760 --> 00:39:59,600 Speaker 1: Are you gonna share that with a committed it's growing? 606 00:40:01,800 --> 00:40:09,840 Speaker 1: Do you want me to take him away? Please? Step 607 00:40:09,880 --> 00:40:14,000 Speaker 1: to the microphones over there? All on? Yeah, the one 608 00:40:14,000 --> 00:40:16,160 Speaker 1: in front of you is as well. High folks, you 609 00:40:16,160 --> 00:40:18,720 Speaker 1: all know me Aaron Cohen. I run the Coasher Delhi 610 00:40:18,760 --> 00:40:21,960 Speaker 1: in town. It's so nice to have you here, and 611 00:40:22,440 --> 00:40:24,960 Speaker 1: I wanted to ask you about how lean he is? 612 00:40:25,080 --> 00:40:29,759 Speaker 1: Little wrong, It's incredibly lean. It's so lean. And I've 613 00:40:29,760 --> 00:40:33,359 Speaker 1: brought a pound for you look right here, and uh 614 00:40:33,400 --> 00:40:40,480 Speaker 1: and some some creplock soup for everyone is cold cold? 615 00:40:41,280 --> 00:40:46,719 Speaker 1: Why am I the only one? Forget Lambert? Sit down now. 616 00:40:46,800 --> 00:40:48,560 Speaker 1: I know I haven't lived here as long as the 617 00:40:48,600 --> 00:40:50,800 Speaker 1: rest of you. I don't have the same cartoonish accent. 618 00:40:50,920 --> 00:40:57,919 Speaker 1: But but you are a Hebrew fellow, that's true. Which 619 00:40:57,960 --> 00:41:03,319 Speaker 1: is cartoon enough? Well? I suppose it is no one, 620 00:41:04,040 --> 00:41:09,000 Speaker 1: no one, lamb book. Look with the high holidays coming 621 00:41:09,080 --> 00:41:13,680 Speaker 1: up like the high ones? Uh? What does that mean? Like? 622 00:41:13,760 --> 00:41:15,839 Speaker 1: I know? Being the Coacher Deli in town. You know, 623 00:41:16,040 --> 00:41:19,560 Speaker 1: I'm just gonna be besieged with with orders. Uh, you know, 624 00:41:19,560 --> 00:41:22,280 Speaker 1: because everyone wants uh you know that needs a slice 625 00:41:22,280 --> 00:41:25,960 Speaker 1: of rye or hallah. Yeah, what specific foods would we 626 00:41:26,000 --> 00:41:33,279 Speaker 1: be ordering at the holiday? Well, pizza, Lamb, book. I 627 00:41:33,320 --> 00:41:39,040 Speaker 1: think that was a little Caesar's commercial. Um. Look, when 628 00:41:39,800 --> 00:41:42,840 Speaker 1: when you need a slice? When when you need a 629 00:41:42,920 --> 00:41:46,279 Speaker 1: loaf of holla sliced? Uh? You know you come to 630 00:41:46,320 --> 00:41:52,799 Speaker 1: me and that's true? What's that now, Carla? Is this 631 00:41:52,880 --> 00:41:57,399 Speaker 1: a trial? Is the going abolie? Yes, there's a coach 632 00:41:57,680 --> 00:42:04,040 Speaker 1: Deli own Main Street? This is all established. Yes, what holiday? Okay, 633 00:42:04,280 --> 00:42:08,399 Speaker 1: Look I really don't I really don't want to get 634 00:42:08,440 --> 00:42:12,719 Speaker 1: into that. You brought it up. I brought it up 635 00:42:12,880 --> 00:42:20,200 Speaker 1: and uh and I apologize. Order Okay, Look, I was 636 00:42:20,280 --> 00:42:24,160 Speaker 1: just gonna propose that the new mascot be named after 637 00:42:24,560 --> 00:42:29,600 Speaker 1: the stop that stop it for God's sake, Lamb. But 638 00:42:29,680 --> 00:42:31,800 Speaker 1: do I have to remove you from the proceedings like 639 00:42:31,960 --> 00:42:35,560 Speaker 1: we do every damn month. You'll never slid, You'll never 640 00:42:35,800 --> 00:42:38,439 Speaker 1: silence me. Nobody is joining in. What are you doing 641 00:42:39,520 --> 00:42:43,440 Speaker 1: the only Yes? Yes, you always the only one, Lambo. 642 00:42:44,320 --> 00:42:47,239 Speaker 1: Now before carling in Jacks again, please tell us the 643 00:42:47,360 --> 00:42:49,640 Speaker 1: name of your machine that you would like the mascot 644 00:42:49,760 --> 00:42:54,440 Speaker 1: the shale. Just kid, it's a slicer. So that's the 645 00:42:54,560 --> 00:42:59,200 Speaker 1: name of the mascot. You'll suggest it's a bread slicer. Yeah, yes, 646 00:42:59,880 --> 00:43:06,040 Speaker 1: is a slice? Have to do with a bunch of coeds? Music? 647 00:43:07,000 --> 00:43:11,160 Speaker 1: Are you familiar with the mascot history? Oh? What is heating? 648 00:43:12,760 --> 00:43:15,000 Speaker 1: Please give me a history lesson on the history of mascot. 649 00:43:15,560 --> 00:43:21,000 Speaker 1: No far, first New York Giants, that's the Giant Bears, 650 00:43:21,040 --> 00:43:33,840 Speaker 1: A musical Philly, the Funky Philly, and so there you 651 00:43:34,000 --> 00:43:39,640 Speaker 1: have it. No, none of that was accurate, lab but sweah, 652 00:43:39,920 --> 00:43:43,520 Speaker 1: have you uh taken from days proceeding? Am I the 653 00:43:43,760 --> 00:43:47,480 Speaker 1: only one? Look? I know it's not conventional, you know, 654 00:43:48,000 --> 00:43:51,600 Speaker 1: for something inanimate to be the mascot, But I just 655 00:43:51,719 --> 00:43:54,279 Speaker 1: think that local teams here are the best things. Since 656 00:43:56,480 --> 00:44:00,560 Speaker 1: I must say, I think that if we trust me 657 00:44:06,640 --> 00:44:16,680 Speaker 1: a lifeguard already he had so much milk in his 658 00:44:16,800 --> 00:44:24,000 Speaker 1: mouth and the doctor puts you on that old mucus 659 00:44:24,120 --> 00:44:38,200 Speaker 1: diet again, please Mr Cohen, Yes, yes, I'm sorry, what 660 00:44:38,480 --> 00:44:41,439 Speaker 1: is it? I'm sorry enough? But the kids, the kids 661 00:44:41,480 --> 00:44:45,440 Speaker 1: are revolting. They need a mascot, and they need one now. Children. 662 00:44:45,719 --> 00:44:53,399 Speaker 1: We want a mascot. We want a mascot. Mascot cow. 663 00:44:54,120 --> 00:44:56,360 Speaker 1: They want a cow. They want a cow that was 664 00:44:56,440 --> 00:44:58,640 Speaker 1: not gonna be a cow they need they're going to riot. 665 00:44:58,760 --> 00:45:03,520 Speaker 1: We already said no to the movine. The suggestions, we're going, right, 666 00:45:04,080 --> 00:45:12,360 Speaker 1: we wanted to. That was good. That was good. Okay, 667 00:45:12,480 --> 00:45:15,319 Speaker 1: then let's go over the suggestions we have so far. 668 00:45:15,680 --> 00:45:19,680 Speaker 1: Thank you, Mr Cohen for yours you so again, slicer, slicer, 669 00:45:23,120 --> 00:45:24,960 Speaker 1: still never got to see why I don't like it. 670 00:45:27,840 --> 00:45:31,920 Speaker 1: But but let me follow up just before we do vote. 671 00:45:32,840 --> 00:45:36,720 Speaker 1: What does the mascot look like? Who's called the slice? 672 00:45:36,800 --> 00:45:40,359 Speaker 1: Or does it look like the machine down at the Delhi? Well, 673 00:45:40,640 --> 00:45:43,880 Speaker 1: I think what it looks like is a piece of 674 00:45:44,160 --> 00:45:48,360 Speaker 1: ride just coming off of all that sounds like the slice. 675 00:45:50,080 --> 00:45:54,600 Speaker 1: I'm sorry this Cohen here, love it here, this is calling. 676 00:45:57,600 --> 00:46:00,480 Speaker 1: I'm wearing a wedding band. Don't lear at me. It's 677 00:46:00,520 --> 00:46:04,360 Speaker 1: my wife Ester everyone uh so a little also Jewish. 678 00:46:05,040 --> 00:46:09,400 Speaker 1: She's also Jewish. Uh a little sketch here again, that 679 00:46:09,480 --> 00:46:13,359 Speaker 1: looks like a slice of bread coming off a machine. Exactly. Yeah, 680 00:46:14,160 --> 00:46:17,680 Speaker 1: so that's that's what the mascot will look like. Well, sure, 681 00:46:17,800 --> 00:46:19,480 Speaker 1: I mean the mascot could be a guy in a 682 00:46:19,600 --> 00:46:24,960 Speaker 1: giant suit that looks like a low Sorry, I was 683 00:46:25,000 --> 00:46:28,480 Speaker 1: trying to make out contact with esther. Okay, yes, I 684 00:46:28,560 --> 00:46:32,480 Speaker 1: love you, Okay, I love you too. He could be 685 00:46:32,560 --> 00:46:35,600 Speaker 1: a slice. He could be a loaf of pumpernickel or 686 00:46:36,000 --> 00:46:38,920 Speaker 1: or holla, I like the pumper nickel. That's a dog bread. 687 00:46:39,280 --> 00:46:42,000 Speaker 1: Yeah that is a dark break. Yeah, so damn all right. 688 00:46:42,040 --> 00:46:45,600 Speaker 1: Here we are Sunday night, and football has happened here 689 00:46:45,600 --> 00:46:47,240 Speaker 1: at the high school level. We do it on Sunday. 690 00:46:47,640 --> 00:46:51,120 Speaker 1: Don't get hotter than this, don't. We got the Sharks 691 00:46:51,480 --> 00:47:00,880 Speaker 1: versus the pumper Nickels, and they are coming in. Oh sick, fantastic, 692 00:47:01,800 --> 00:47:05,120 Speaker 1: And that's always gonna give us. You know you paid 693 00:47:05,200 --> 00:47:07,399 Speaker 1: that to John tin Bugs. That's how you get, you get. 694 00:47:09,360 --> 00:47:12,799 Speaker 1: That's all we need. Now. Pumper Nickel head coach Mark 695 00:47:12,840 --> 00:47:14,920 Speaker 1: Truffle is out here. He's gonna be able to give 696 00:47:14,960 --> 00:47:17,680 Speaker 1: us a little breakdown of what's gonna happen tonight's game 697 00:47:17,760 --> 00:47:20,680 Speaker 1: for tonight. And the follow up question, Mark is the 698 00:47:20,800 --> 00:47:26,400 Speaker 1: quarterback single and is eighteen? He is in fact over eighteen, 699 00:47:27,200 --> 00:47:34,359 Speaker 1: so completely legal if that question. Yeah, he's twenty two. Yeah, yeah, 700 00:47:34,520 --> 00:47:38,320 Speaker 1: we've we've got a long, storied history, but he just 701 00:47:38,480 --> 00:47:41,319 Speaker 1: keeps winning games, so we'd rather he not graduating. So far, 702 00:47:41,400 --> 00:47:45,880 Speaker 1: he's agreed. We're gonna take the game to our our opponent. 703 00:47:46,040 --> 00:47:48,880 Speaker 1: That's our plan for tonight, and we still would like 704 00:47:48,960 --> 00:47:51,120 Speaker 1: to doesn't sound like much of a plan to take 705 00:47:51,200 --> 00:47:54,879 Speaker 1: the game to the team seems vague and open. Well, 706 00:47:54,920 --> 00:47:56,600 Speaker 1: I don't want to give away any of our secrets 707 00:47:56,680 --> 00:48:00,799 Speaker 1: before the game starts. Smart like to put a word 708 00:48:00,840 --> 00:48:04,719 Speaker 1: out there to all the fans of the pumper Nickels that, um, 709 00:48:05,200 --> 00:48:09,759 Speaker 1: we really enjoyed playing Friday nights. Uh the way every 710 00:48:09,840 --> 00:48:11,799 Speaker 1: high school don't have anything to do with that team 711 00:48:11,840 --> 00:48:14,720 Speaker 1: has ever played. And suddenly we guys switched the Sunday 712 00:48:14,800 --> 00:48:17,640 Speaker 1: nights and well they're using different things. They're using this 713 00:48:17,880 --> 00:48:20,000 Speaker 1: area for different things Holiday on Friday, so we're not 714 00:48:20,000 --> 00:48:24,600 Speaker 1: allowed to every Collins moved to town exactly. Okay, Well, 715 00:48:24,680 --> 00:48:27,600 Speaker 1: we're just let me get back to get me started. Honestly, 716 00:48:27,640 --> 00:48:30,520 Speaker 1: don't get me started. No, I'm not I'm not doing anything. 717 00:48:30,560 --> 00:48:32,680 Speaker 1: I'm not saying anything. But that's that's the problem. Just 718 00:48:32,760 --> 00:48:49,480 Speaker 1: don't what's the proms you am are? And I see Okay, Oh, Okay, 719 00:48:49,600 --> 00:48:50,840 Speaker 1: so we're not gonna be able to do this on 720 00:48:51,000 --> 00:48:53,440 Speaker 1: senda if we don't know how to pronounce their names. 721 00:48:53,440 --> 00:48:59,280 Speaker 1: It's not pronounced. It's stout either way. Look, you're on steroids. 722 00:48:59,560 --> 00:49:05,359 Speaker 1: I am out you are. Everyone knows your body's same 723 00:49:05,480 --> 00:49:08,279 Speaker 1: is totally totally different in the last one, it's a 724 00:49:08,320 --> 00:49:11,440 Speaker 1: perfect t it's sick. I don't hear you have bulked 725 00:49:11,480 --> 00:49:14,439 Speaker 1: up in the creepiest way, and you mean all the time. Okay, 726 00:49:14,600 --> 00:49:19,480 Speaker 1: no one complains when I catch the floorlessly good space 727 00:49:19,560 --> 00:49:25,200 Speaker 1: of the pyramid. That's true. Damn right. You broke Breasta's spine. Okay, 728 00:49:26,520 --> 00:49:28,960 Speaker 1: she has got to have some sort of ostroporosis or 729 00:49:29,000 --> 00:49:33,360 Speaker 1: something because that was a normal Roses. You're stupid. That 730 00:49:33,520 --> 00:49:36,279 Speaker 1: is stupidest thing. And pronouncing and spelling the same thing. 731 00:49:36,480 --> 00:49:41,400 Speaker 1: We're not the same squad without Bresta and Brea. Oh, 732 00:49:41,560 --> 00:49:46,080 Speaker 1: this is terring as apar. This new name is. We 733 00:49:46,200 --> 00:49:50,440 Speaker 1: have to decide. We have to decide we won't Google. 734 00:49:52,520 --> 00:49:56,480 Speaker 1: It's not performance enhancement. Everybody uses Google. Oh my gosh, 735 00:49:57,239 --> 00:50:01,560 Speaker 1: stop shooting up right now. Listen. This is this is 736 00:50:01,680 --> 00:50:04,440 Speaker 1: performance enhancement. Google is not. We should be able to 737 00:50:04,560 --> 00:50:06,680 Speaker 1: use Google. Is that the only vein you can find 738 00:50:06,719 --> 00:50:10,279 Speaker 1: between your toes. Yeah, oh my god, your feet is 739 00:50:10,320 --> 00:50:15,359 Speaker 1: a fucked up. Yeah, I'm flat footed. Okay, where are 740 00:50:15,400 --> 00:50:17,919 Speaker 1: you getting that? That's a big needle. That's too big. 741 00:50:18,440 --> 00:50:23,000 Speaker 1: My dad's affect, my dad's effect. What war was the end? No, 742 00:50:23,160 --> 00:50:27,520 Speaker 1: he's a veterinary dumb dumb your lipid. We're all stupid, 743 00:50:34,560 --> 00:50:38,920 Speaker 1: my bag, I'm twenty four. What wouldn't let me graduate? 744 00:50:39,360 --> 00:50:50,040 Speaker 1: You're too good? Oh? I guess so that's our man. 745 00:50:50,800 --> 00:50:53,279 Speaker 1: When Joey put his face down the table, I knew 746 00:50:53,280 --> 00:50:57,319 Speaker 1: it was a magical day. Let's take all of our 747 00:50:57,360 --> 00:51:00,719 Speaker 1: alchemists together and yet separately. Joey, we're going to start 748 00:51:00,760 --> 00:51:04,279 Speaker 1: with you. Please tell us a little something about yourself. Uh, 749 00:51:04,719 --> 00:51:10,600 Speaker 1: let's see what I want to share. Um hm, put 750 00:51:10,680 --> 00:51:13,879 Speaker 1: that away. Okay, I guess I'm an any I haven't 751 00:51:13,880 --> 00:51:19,760 Speaker 1: share that. Yeah. What about your belly button? Uh? It moves, 752 00:51:19,920 --> 00:51:23,360 Speaker 1: it moves wherever my belly button is, different parts of 753 00:51:23,400 --> 00:51:26,480 Speaker 1: my stomach at different times a day. Fantastic, James Enie. 754 00:51:27,200 --> 00:51:32,000 Speaker 1: Well for me, I haven't any belly button, an Auntie Penis, 755 00:51:33,800 --> 00:51:36,279 Speaker 1: I think everything's pretty much normal. Got the normal? Oh, 756 00:51:36,440 --> 00:51:39,839 Speaker 1: here we go. But the One thing that's awesome about 757 00:51:39,920 --> 00:51:42,480 Speaker 1: me is that there are reviews. And there's one from 758 00:51:42,560 --> 00:51:45,560 Speaker 1: Emily in the United States and she says, due to 759 00:51:45,640 --> 00:51:50,879 Speaker 1: my successful shaming, she's officially submitting review You're so good 760 00:51:50,920 --> 00:51:54,160 Speaker 1: at that. I didn't realize how good I should have 761 00:51:54,239 --> 00:51:55,719 Speaker 1: I should have been a parent. I would have been 762 00:51:55,760 --> 00:51:59,239 Speaker 1: great at shaming. Really, okay, good good news. Do you 763 00:51:59,280 --> 00:52:01,520 Speaker 1: want to read her review? That was the beginning, okay? 764 00:52:01,520 --> 00:52:03,760 Speaker 1: And then it goes on with a smiley face emoji 765 00:52:03,760 --> 00:52:06,360 Speaker 1: and it says, I love alchemy. This so funny and creative. 766 00:52:06,440 --> 00:52:08,840 Speaker 1: Such a nice change of pace in the podcast world. 767 00:52:09,320 --> 00:52:12,239 Speaker 1: I'm always very impressed by the improv. Very cool. I 768 00:52:12,360 --> 00:52:15,520 Speaker 1: hope you guys get big enough to do live shows 769 00:52:15,560 --> 00:52:20,720 Speaker 1: around the US. I'd come to a live recording. Emily, 770 00:52:21,000 --> 00:52:23,840 Speaker 1: very sweet. Emily, Thank you for that, and thank you, James. 771 00:52:24,080 --> 00:52:29,359 Speaker 1: Thank you for thinking me. Vanessa, thank you any everything. Sure, 772 00:52:32,360 --> 00:52:36,319 Speaker 1: thank you for that. Craig. If you want to get 773 00:52:36,360 --> 00:52:38,080 Speaker 1: started with the work of the late Dr John, I 774 00:52:38,120 --> 00:52:42,480 Speaker 1: would recommend the nine eight album Gree Gree, which guy 775 00:52:42,520 --> 00:52:44,920 Speaker 1: has such tracks as gree Greek Gumbo, Yeah Yeah, and 776 00:52:45,280 --> 00:52:48,800 Speaker 1: uh I Walk on Gilded Splinters. Thank you for all 777 00:52:49,560 --> 00:52:53,560 Speaker 1: time classic of psychedelic swamp rock, indeed perhaps the leader, 778 00:52:54,560 --> 00:52:59,960 Speaker 1: perhaps perhaps niche itself. Thank you to our engineer Doug 779 00:53:01,640 --> 00:53:06,799 Speaker 1: our post, sound design artist Raphaelbrito, and our producers Orman 780 00:53:07,760 --> 00:53:17,800 Speaker 1: I Heart Radio Media, Dr John. This is Richard Market. 781 00:53:20,560 --> 00:53:25,040 Speaker 1: Who's the phony? Now? Are we not going to get 782 00:53:25,080 --> 00:53:28,000 Speaker 1: in trouble for that? Oh? I hope so. I encourage 783 00:53:28,040 --> 00:53:33,080 Speaker 1: all doesn't write a review. Yeah, here's hoping he doesn't 784 00:53:33,360 --> 00:53:37,359 Speaker 1: here the episode. I'm gonna send it to him. I've 785 00:53:37,400 --> 00:53:39,880 Speaker 1: just got to stock him for a couple of weeks. 786 00:53:40,120 --> 00:53:43,279 Speaker 1: Get some information. Isn't where to send it? Encourage all 787 00:53:43,320 --> 00:53:44,680 Speaker 1: of you to write a review. Un Tell everyone you've 788 00:53:44,680 --> 00:53:46,560 Speaker 1: ever met and write to us at your name here 789 00:53:46,560 --> 00:53:49,520 Speaker 1: at alchemy this dot com. It's your name here at 790 00:53:49,560 --> 00:53:52,080 Speaker 1: alchemy this dot com. Until next time. I'm Kevin Pollock 791 00:54:03,160 --> 00:54:21,520 Speaker 1: and a football and a football