Speaker 1: The Nicky Glazer Poda. Here's Nikki. Hello here, I am
Speaker 1: welcome to the show. It's Nicki Glazer Podcast. I'm Nikki Glazer.
Speaker 1: It is Thursday. I am in St. Louis with Andrew
Speaker 1: and I have both dogs on my lap. Andrew has
Speaker 1: both our little stuffed animals on his lap so that
Speaker 1: he doesn't feel alone. And it's funny that they, the
Speaker 1: hedgehog and the llama are Luigian Marian. Okay, well, Marian
Speaker 1: is going over underneath the table now. Isn't that what
Speaker 1: animals do to go die? Why are you underneath the table?
Speaker 1: She's getting shade in our room. She's so hot. I
Speaker 1: just took her for um walk and she just lays
Speaker 1: like we went in the Starbucks. She just lays flat
Speaker 1: on the ground to get that cool ground. She's so
Speaker 1: she's so overheated. It's so goddamn hot outside. Think about
Speaker 1: how many times she has to step to just to
Speaker 1: get there. I know she has so many more steps. Yeah,
Speaker 1: you're right, you're those Santa Pete, aren't you? And I
Speaker 1: pick her up because she gets so lazy on walk.
Speaker 1: She's so fat right now? What's she doing? Look at
Speaker 1: She's going even deeper underneath the table camera. I don't
Speaker 1: know that. There's something about what dogs want to die.
Speaker 1: They go away and they go, oh hurt taylors Wagon,
Speaker 1: she's not dying. No, no no, no, she doesn't jump up,
Speaker 1: she hasn't. Don't don't you always gotta pick her up? Sorry?
Speaker 1: I saw I saw some video of like this dog
Speaker 1: I was gonna was too old to die. That sounds
Speaker 1: like a James Bond Yeah, that actually is pretty cool line.
Speaker 1: H James want Sean Connery dead? Yes, yeah, welcome to
Speaker 1: the row. I think he is. I think he died
Speaker 1: of I'm gonna say four years ago. Five years ago
Speaker 1: I found out Don McLean was still alive today. Really,
Speaker 1: oh yeah, he sent Taylor Oh no, no, no, I'm sorry.
Speaker 1: He died at age ninety October twentieth foss alarm October
Speaker 1: four years ago. In what it's felt like, dog just
Speaker 1: walked off into the woods and goes, I'm too old.
Speaker 1: I'm gonna die. I know I'm gonna die. That's crazy.
Speaker 1: Luigi thought Luigi was really really sick when I first
Speaker 1: got him once and he just disappeared. They don't want
Speaker 1: to burden you, and they want to be alone. And
Speaker 1: that's when your animals go off and do something weird
Speaker 1: and they're like hiding under tables. Something they're hiding so
Speaker 1: that I don't know, there's probably like they don't want
Speaker 1: to be bothered when they die. They want their like
Speaker 1: I don't know what it is. But he went out.
Speaker 1: He would not come out from under the stairs because
Speaker 1: he's just going down there to die. And it was
Speaker 1: so sad when we looked up, like what's going on
Speaker 1: with that, and they're like, no, that's what they do
Speaker 1: before they die. And I was like, oh, Luigi was dying.
Speaker 1: Oh my god, Yeah, you were a baby boy. He
Speaker 1: was so sick. It's he was so cute when he
Speaker 1: was sick. I wanted to make him sick. I'm a
Speaker 1: little embarrassed that I'm dying. Kidding. Yeah, they're like ashamed.
Speaker 1: I always that way about a subway. If I die
Speaker 1: on the subway, I would feel terrible say that to
Speaker 1: just I don't know. I think my last like would
Speaker 1: be embarrassing. We're talking about like getting creamate and stuff,
Speaker 1: and it's like I would literally donated my body to
Speaker 1: necro Felix because I don't care or or lay it
Speaker 1: out in the like, I'm sure you have some listeners
Speaker 1: right now they're like, please die tomorrow. They I mean
Speaker 1: that those people just want me dad. They don't want
Speaker 1: to suck my buddy. I mean that's just YouTube commenters.
Speaker 1: UM what I wanted to say, though, I read on
Speaker 1: read on Reddit that um, a lot of people this
Speaker 1: woman goes it was the saddest story gear up trigger
Speaker 1: warning for sad dog thing. She was like, my dog
Speaker 1: recently died and uh, you know not not like they
Speaker 1: weren't even that old or anything, but they were just
Speaker 1: having issues where they were like peeing in the house,
Speaker 1: shipping in the house, and like she was like, I
Speaker 1: didn't know that that was a sign of like like
Speaker 1: severe illness that my dog was like shutting body, shut,
Speaker 1: shutting down. I just thought the dog was being bad,
Speaker 1: and so like, I feel so bad reflecting on how
Speaker 1: I was like yelling at my dog the weeks leading
Speaker 1: up to it's like diagnosis because I just thought he
Speaker 1: was being like a bad dog and I was like
Speaker 1: yelling at him because he but he couldn't control it.
Speaker 1: And it's like, so if your pet is doing things
Speaker 1: that it's like abnormal, don't yell at them. Last night
Speaker 1: I got up to go the bathroom, I walked. I
Speaker 1: always walked marrying the Luigi right before I go to bed,
Speaker 1: so like sometimes eleven thirty at night, just for their
Speaker 1: last p because the idea of them holding in Pete
Speaker 1: throughout the night like makes me so sad. So they
Speaker 1: both went. And then in the middle of this morning,
Speaker 1: at five am, I went to the to my bathroom
Speaker 1: and I'm like, God, Chris's shower last night is still
Speaker 1: you got water everywhere? Maryan b everywhere a lot too,
Speaker 1: And I was like, did that's that's what I do
Speaker 1: when she pas? Even though little dog? God, well, they
Speaker 1: were playing so art last night that they were drinking
Speaker 1: a lot. They were playing so it was so freaking cute.
Speaker 1: They were lying they sit, yeah they do. You know
Speaker 1: what lists their spirits is? I don't know what this is,
Speaker 1: if there's any vets listening. Why is Luigi such a
Speaker 1: bummer when I'm home alone with him, Like, he's always
Speaker 1: looks sad. He always is looking at me disappointed. He's
Speaker 1: never wanting to play with me. He gets excited when
Speaker 1: I first come home after a while, but then it's
Speaker 1: just like as soon as that is over, he just
Speaker 1: goes to the couch and he looks at me like
Speaker 1: like he's almost like ashamed or sad, and like I go,
Speaker 1: what's going on? And he and he gets he leans
Speaker 1: away from me because he's just so sad. And the
Speaker 1: second Chris or you or any friend comes over that
Speaker 1: he knows he starts playing again, like not with us,
Speaker 1: but just like he gets active and starts like going
Speaker 1: to chew on a bone in the corner like acts, no,
Speaker 1: there's no attention, Like there's no, he's not getting attention
Speaker 1: when a friend comes over, it's like it's it's it's
Speaker 1: it's not because he's getting attention from both of us,
Speaker 1: Like I will just have a friend. No, mom be
Speaker 1: sitting on the couch talking and Luigi suddenly will be
Speaker 1: happy across the room chewing on a bone like la
Speaker 1: la la, Like why why can't he be like that?
Speaker 1: Think about yourself. When you're with your mom, you're not like, yeah, wow,
Speaker 1: just alone with her. You just sit in silence and
Speaker 1: then cool uncle shows up, You're gonna get more excited.
Speaker 1: That's the same kind of concept. I don't get what
Speaker 1: you're saying. I I would have just been happy, like
Speaker 1: hanging with my mom. I didn't like when uncle showed up.
Speaker 1: I don't want my mom's friend to show up. I
Speaker 1: want more attention because now my mom is giving attention
Speaker 1: to this person. So it doesn't make sense to me.
Speaker 1: He just likes to having all the people he loves
Speaker 1: together in one place. It's almost like when Chris isn't
Speaker 1: here or you're not here, he's worrying about you. But
Speaker 1: then when he's got you both here to people who
Speaker 1: he knows he loves, he's just happy to have you.
Speaker 1: And so every time Chris is over, he's like, they
Speaker 1: are so cute, and I'm like, they are never like
Speaker 1: this when I'm alone. Luigi is a different animal when
Speaker 1: I'm with him, and then when someone else is around,
Speaker 1: he is just so um. He's just happy. He's chewing
Speaker 1: on bones. He won't touch a goddamn toy to save
Speaker 1: his life. When I'm alone with him, he has bones everywhere,
Speaker 1: fresh treating. I will give him treats. I'll give him
Speaker 1: pieces of like a fucking pigeon I just killed. No,
Speaker 1: But the second someone comes over and I'm like hey
Speaker 1: and we're just talking tos, not even paying attention to him,
Speaker 1: he goes and he picks up that bone, and then
Speaker 1: he's like, I'm not and he just choosing the corner
Speaker 1: by himself. It's so weird. Here, here's my theory. My
Speaker 1: theory is when you're home alone with him, he feels like, Okay,
Speaker 1: I just have my mom here, I'm doing my job
Speaker 1: to hold my post. And then when someone else comes,
Speaker 1: he feels free, especially if it's someone that he trusts. Okay, well,
Speaker 1: this person is taking care of my mom. I'm gonna
Speaker 1: go do my little thing in the corner. I like that.
Speaker 1: The only thing that because I do think that in
Speaker 1: some ways that's true. He is so not aware of
Speaker 1: me when I'm home. It's not it's not like he's
Speaker 1: like worried about me. He's he's mad. It looks like
Speaker 1: he's mad at me. Constantly. I'll look at him, then
Speaker 1: I look over at him and he'll just look back
Speaker 1: away and I'll go get when some kisses and hugs
Speaker 1: and he'll he'll move away from me, like get away.
Speaker 1: He hates it when we do the podcast. He fucking
Speaker 1: loves it. He loves this is his comfort zone. As
Speaker 1: two people he knows talking to another person on zoom,
Speaker 1: two people he knows, having fun, Like he just feels
Speaker 1: secure when when there's family together. I think I relate
Speaker 1: to that of like when everyone's taking care of your
Speaker 1: maybe your right, no, like I know that these people
Speaker 1: are taking care of so I don't have to try anymore. Well,
Speaker 1: I mean when he gets to your parents house, he
Speaker 1: perks up like a motherfucker, gets real excited. It's that's
Speaker 1: that I'm not confused about, because that I haven't seen
Speaker 1: a while. The initial like Chris comes over, He's like,
Speaker 1: all over Chris. I get all that. It's after Chris
Speaker 1: and I are just established. Hours later, he's chewing on bones.
Speaker 1: He's so happy and has nothing to do with us.
Speaker 1: It's it's not like he's playing with us. Does something
Speaker 1: similar like we'll hang out in the house, you know,
Speaker 1: and then when Brennan comes, it's like a different cat.
Speaker 1: It's like, who then is this guy? This guy is
Speaker 1: a good time. Have you been, Um, how's how's it
Speaker 1: been being home from the road? We have the weekend off,
Speaker 1: You're going to a wedding coming up? Um? Yeah, what's
Speaker 1: been the scoop this week? We don't talk outside of
Speaker 1: the podcast how's life been? We save it all for
Speaker 1: the pods. Listen if you're If that makes anyone sad
Speaker 1: out there, how often do you talk to your best friend?
Speaker 1: We talked to each other for an hour a day.
Speaker 1: We're together all weekend, like we talked plenty. We we
Speaker 1: we've probably talked more than any two people on earth almost,
Speaker 1: you know. So anyhow, Um, it's good. Like things are good.
Speaker 1: Like I don't know. I mean, I'm I'm happy, freaking
Speaker 1: I I like being home. I like having a schedule.
Speaker 1: Now for some reason, I'm getting older. I like I
Speaker 1: see myself as a morning person. This morning, I worked
Speaker 1: out at seven seven am. I went to a class
Speaker 1: seven am, and I loved it. Then I had all morning.
Speaker 1: I was just doing like little things that I necessarily
Speaker 1: want to do. They don't I don't overthink it. I
Speaker 1: just get it done. I love when I wake up
Speaker 1: early in the morning and you get something done and
Speaker 1: then you have you've accomplished so much by eleven, like
Speaker 1: you're just like I'm my day is done and now
Speaker 1: there's no burden of like I gotta get that thing done.
Speaker 1: It takes me a while, though, to get back into that.
Speaker 1: Like I'm supposed to be writing my book proposal, and
Speaker 1: I'm like I can't. I did a show on Sunday night. Monday,
Speaker 1: I have to do a podcast and I I didn't
Speaker 1: have a day off. I know I don't have days off,
Speaker 1: and so I said it last week, but I mean,
Speaker 1: I I can't get I was supposed to start my
Speaker 1: book proposal this week again and start working on I
Speaker 1: cannot do it. I've been sleeping. I've been pushing the
Speaker 1: podcast till eleven thirty because I'm like, I need to
Speaker 1: stay in bed, like I just can't get up, and
Speaker 1: it's um. But when I'm when I am home long
Speaker 1: enough where I can get in that routine, god, it
Speaker 1: feels good. It takes me like three or four days
Speaker 1: to get back in that kind of routine. I've been
Speaker 1: running again and it's awesome. I really feel like if
Speaker 1: you ever to we didn't go on the road, I
Speaker 1: would be I'd be like a six am person. For me,
Speaker 1: it's not the road on the weekend, it's the um.
Speaker 1: It's the week days being filled with bullshit, like the
Speaker 1: press stuff has been killing me. Like I feel like
Speaker 1: Monday to Thursday, Friday, Sunday to Thursday, or Monday to Friday,
Speaker 1: that's a good enough chunk where I'm like, Okay, I
Speaker 1: can always count on that to do the same thing.
Speaker 1: Like weekends, I can be traveling and it's like a weekend,
Speaker 1: you know, if I have Monday to Friday where I'm
Speaker 1: just doing a one podcasterday and maybe one other or
Speaker 1: working on my book book proposal, that leaves me enough
Speaker 1: space to create to do stuff. It's just like I
Speaker 1: just can't get a break. It's just constant. I had
Speaker 1: to have a phone call with a woman after this
Speaker 1: about I signed up to do this thing that I
Speaker 1: thought would be really fun because I thought I would
Speaker 1: have time to do it, and it's like I don't
Speaker 1: have any time. I had to learn a TikTok dance
Speaker 1: this NBC show that I have to film myself doing.
Speaker 1: I thought I could film myself on the phone. They
Speaker 1: just sent an entire camera case that I have to
Speaker 1: set up and learned this TikTok dance. I haven't learned
Speaker 1: the dance yet. I invited my sister over because I
Speaker 1: was like, it would be fun for us. Both were
Speaker 1: both bad at dancing, but we like to learn dances
Speaker 1: to learn it and I love I don't care about
Speaker 1: being a bad dancer on TV anymore. So I gladly
Speaker 1: was like, I'll do this. They're not paying me that much,
Speaker 1: but I'm like, I got Now I gotta learn this dance.
Speaker 1: I thought it was going to be like three weeks
Speaker 1: from down. They're like, no, we needed by Friday eight am.
Speaker 1: So it's Wednesday right now. By the way we're filming this,
Speaker 1: I have to learn a dance in two days. That
Speaker 1: is not that easy. And to set up a camera. Yeah,
Speaker 1: I love that they're making you the director. They're like,
Speaker 1: hold the boom? Can you hold the boom? And can
Speaker 1: you get yourself flying to l A As soon as
Speaker 1: they go you can do this remotely. I was like,
Speaker 1: and they said shoot it in high death and I'm like, oh,
Speaker 1: that means on your phone. I think they changed their
Speaker 1: mind after the initial pitch, and now they're like, but
Speaker 1: I did get I'm not giving back the suitcase they
Speaker 1: just sent me. And they sent me a suitcase and
Speaker 1: it's a gorgeous suitcase. So I'm like, I'm keeping that.
Speaker 1: It's probably like a Target one, but still put nice
Speaker 1: three months. You're gonna be like, yeah, we're gonna need
Speaker 1: that bad man. But I've loved getting back in a routine. Yeah,
Speaker 1: I've been running again, and you know what, Yeah, I
Speaker 1: just do the same route every day. I probably gotta
Speaker 1: switch it up and I'm gonna get murdered. But um,
Speaker 1: I've been bringing my Tiger Lady with me when it
Speaker 1: has it's my self defense tool. So come at me.
Speaker 1: You're gonna get scratched pretty hard. It's gonna be pretty annoying.
Speaker 1: You can still write me, but you're gonna your your
Speaker 1: back's gonna get You're gonna look like you were first. Yeah,
Speaker 1: they're gonna look like I liked it at first. Um,
Speaker 1: I uh yeah. But it's been fucking hot here. I
Speaker 1: mean we we left on Friday. Last Friday, it was
Speaker 1: forty degrees. We came back on Sunday, um forecast for
Speaker 1: Monday four degrees. So I've been running and I love
Speaker 1: running in extreme heat. I love it. There's something about
Speaker 1: it's like because I don't run for like burning calories anymore.
Speaker 1: I run for like the cleanse of it, like my
Speaker 1: soul and like just sweating a lot and like feeling like, oh,
Speaker 1: like I love the feeling that I get on a run.
Speaker 1: Four miles is perfect for me because the first smile,
Speaker 1: I'm like Okay, this is easy one mile, and then
Speaker 1: the second mile, I'm like, oh it's a little bit harder.
Speaker 1: Third mile. I want to fucking die and I want
Speaker 1: to give up, but I keep going because I like
Speaker 1: the feeling of Louis k used to say he'd run
Speaker 1: five miles a day because there's always a partner in
Speaker 1: five miles where he wanted to give up, and you
Speaker 1: have to persevere a pest. Everything in your body is
Speaker 1: saying please stop. Which there's a point where if you're
Speaker 1: having an injury, do please stop. Writing a movie, And
Speaker 1: like those middle pages that are like you just gotta
Speaker 1: get through them to get to the writing a movie. Yeah,
Speaker 1: middle pages, if you write a movie, it's like I said,
Speaker 1: watching a movie, I'm like reading a movie. Subtitles call
Speaker 1: the pages. Um. Yeah, Like the middle is the hard part.
Speaker 1: But man, when that voice on my app goes one
Speaker 1: mile left, like it's perfect. There's something about thinks in
Speaker 1: quadrants for me. Four pieces first pieces like easy, second piece,
Speaker 1: a little hard, third piece. I want to die. If
Speaker 1: there was two more pieces, it was fifth, it would
Speaker 1: be a little bit more insurmountable. There's something about the
Speaker 1: last fourth that is so easy because it's almost done,
Speaker 1: and I just it feels like it's it takes me
Speaker 1: fifty thirty six to fifty minutes to do this, depending
Speaker 1: on how fast I'm going. And lately, because I just
Speaker 1: don't care about the time, I'm not trying to be
Speaker 1: at the time and I'm just trying to like kind
Speaker 1: of just listen to a podcast, like go through my thoughts.
Speaker 1: I've been running like ten fifty miles, Like I mean,
Speaker 1: I used to be up seven thirty and now I'm like, no,
Speaker 1: this is just about shuffling along and it's just so
Speaker 1: it's so nice and you instantly feel better. My mind
Speaker 1: is so much clearer. I feel healthy, like I don't.
Speaker 1: There's no part of me anymore that goes, oh no,
Speaker 1: I can eat a lot tonight, or like, oh good,
Speaker 1: I'm not gonna be There's no It used to always
Speaker 1: be mode evated by I don't want to be fat,
Speaker 1: or like now I can eat, or now I deserve
Speaker 1: something on the other side of this, And instead now
Speaker 1: it's just like a treat that I get to go run.
Speaker 1: I'm like excited. So I feel about that class. You know,
Speaker 1: it's interesting, like it's it's f forty five it's called
Speaker 1: and I've talked about how it's like a little CULTI
Speaker 1: like today was David Beckham day, Like it's his workout.
Speaker 1: He comes up on the screen, so he's getting paid
Speaker 1: millions of dollars. Yeah, it's so funny too. He's like
Speaker 1: stands on his on his good side the whole time.
Speaker 1: He's stupid. He's like, hey, what's up guy. It's like
Speaker 1: it's just his left side of It's it's very Mariah Gary.
Speaker 1: But the f stands are functional. And obviously I joked
Speaker 1: that I can't get on the floor and stuff like that,
Speaker 1: and I've on'tly been doing this two weeks. But a
Speaker 1: lot of its movement that you just don't do when
Speaker 1: you get older. You just you just work out. You
Speaker 1: either run or you This is like ship you would
Speaker 1: do like if you were training for soccer back in
Speaker 1: I mean hence David By like like today there were
Speaker 1: like box jumps and this box it was like four ft.
Speaker 1: I'm like, I'm not getting like, I don't know in
Speaker 1: my mind as a forty two year old man, I go,
Speaker 1: if you ask me literally two weeks ago, could you
Speaker 1: get up on the I go, no, I can't, And
Speaker 1: literally in two, dysfunctional forty two. Yeah, yeah, diabetes forty two.
Speaker 1: I'm sucking jumping on this box and ship and I'm like,
Speaker 1: it's like blowing my mind how quick you can change
Speaker 1: your brain and your body to fucking to be like
Speaker 1: no ages, I know it sounds just you can literally
Speaker 1: still move your body, like really, well, if you could
Speaker 1: just get over the hump in two weeks up stack
Speaker 1: of boxes David Becka that are sponsored by David left Side. No,
Speaker 1: it's that's a good point, and I always referenced this,
Speaker 1: so I'm sorry I've said a million times on the podcast,
Speaker 1: but it just boggles my fucking mind. The story that
Speaker 1: I heard on Radio Lab that podcast about a woman
Speaker 1: who was an ultramarathon runner that used to run marathons
Speaker 1: and half marathons and she was always get like, you know,
Speaker 1: she was just casually a marathon runner, not good at all.
Speaker 1: Her brain. She had a brain injury where a part
Speaker 1: of her brain that uh short term memories. She has
Speaker 1: no short term memory anymore, so her brain is constantly restarting.
Speaker 1: She can remember things long term, like you know where
Speaker 1: she went to high school, friends from, but like anything
Speaker 1: short term, it's not it's constantly restarting, and she could
Speaker 1: suddenly overnight do these hundred and fifty mile races when
Speaker 1: she was really just a you know, a five kres
Speaker 1: it was like a ten k Like she wasn't doing
Speaker 1: anything like any anywhere close to this. All that changed
Speaker 1: for her was that she was looking at these races.
Speaker 1: It was she was constantly starting over on these races.
Speaker 1: So if you constantly look at your life as instead
Speaker 1: of going this bike, right, I have to do is
Speaker 1: twenty miles, if you just take it one mile at
Speaker 1: a time and start over, you can do more than
Speaker 1: you've ever thought you could do. And I think that
Speaker 1: that's something that I you know, even for this book.
Speaker 1: As soon as my the woman helping me was like,
Speaker 1: let's not look at this as like a forty page proposal.
Speaker 1: Let's take it one page at a time, one little thing.
Speaker 1: There's always tiny steps you can do. And I think
Speaker 1: that that's that's just it's so mental because the way
Speaker 1: we look at these things we go I can't, like
Speaker 1: I was talking about two days ago about the whatever
Speaker 1: you're dealing with binge, eating, uh, smoking cigarettes, drinking, this
Speaker 1: idea of like it's hard, this is gonna be This
Speaker 1: recovery is so hard. Quitting drinking so hard. If you
Speaker 1: keep telling yourself that it's you're not gonna you're you're
Speaker 1: giving yourself excuses not to to give to give up
Speaker 1: along the way, if you treat it like, well, actually,
Speaker 1: I just have to be sober this next minute, then
Speaker 1: this next minute. Then I always tell people that are like,
Speaker 1: you know, in my eating to sort of recovery, They're like,
Speaker 1: I'm never gonna get to binge again. That's the only
Speaker 1: thing I ever want to do, saying that you just
Speaker 1: don't binge for the next five minutes, and then start
Speaker 1: over and say you could you can binge in five minutes.
Speaker 1: How it feels after five minutes not doing it. Let's
Speaker 1: go to break and see if you can make it
Speaker 1: through this new commercial break without binging. We're back. I
Speaker 1: know this is turning into like an eating disorder hell podcast,
Speaker 1: but I feel like, as I've been listening to podcasts
Speaker 1: that have helped me overcome stuff, if I have a
Speaker 1: message of recovery that can get through with a comedy
Speaker 1: like self Care kind of the conversational podcast we have,
Speaker 1: why not put that in there, because you know we
Speaker 1: can have it. You can have it all you I don't.
Speaker 1: I'm doing this recovery talk tonight, which is last night.
Speaker 1: It happened on Facebook. It's uh if you want to
Speaker 1: check it out, It's the Addiction Center. It's American Addiction
Speaker 1: Centers facebook page. I did at Facebook live about my
Speaker 1: recovery journey in quotations because to me, I just I
Speaker 1: you know, once I got sober from alcohol, I went
Speaker 1: to pot, and then once the pot was taken away,
Speaker 1: I went to limia, and then I went from beliemia.
Speaker 1: I went to been starving myself like I'm always and
Speaker 1: then once I was starving my couldn't starve myself anymore,
Speaker 1: I went back to pot, like I'm always replacing it,
Speaker 1: and even now I'm like micro dosing a little bit,
Speaker 1: and like there's always I'm I'm replacing. So I'm a
Speaker 1: little bit reluctant to be like I'm recovered and I
Speaker 1: can't wait to share my steps with you, But I
Speaker 1: do feel, um, I'm very grateful that I get to
Speaker 1: like talk about it and it I now it does
Speaker 1: help people, because first of all, it's not fucking perfect
Speaker 1: and I and I posted about it in Rachel find
Speaker 1: Stein wrote to me I was like, so good that
Speaker 1: you're doing this, and I'm like, I feel like a
Speaker 1: fraud because I'm like, I just took like a micro
Speaker 1: dose mushrooms, which I don't feel, but I do like it.
Speaker 1: I know it helps me. There's something. It's not like
Speaker 1: I'm like getting fucked up or I'm like, whoa the sun.
Speaker 1: It's like so subtle, I don't feel it, but I'm
Speaker 1: still reaching to something that is not me to like
Speaker 1: help me. And I'm on the antide pressence. Actually I'm
Speaker 1: not anymore, but I'm on like I take things is
Speaker 1: to make me feel better. Sometimes I do a kombucha
Speaker 1: because I'm like, I just want to feel something different.
Speaker 1: Caffeine I'm fucking addicted to. But I feel like, as
Speaker 1: I always tell people that are dealing with addiction, stuff
Speaker 1: is like there's always gonna be something you supplement it with,
Speaker 1: whether it's crying, whether it's like feeling your feelings, like
Speaker 1: all these uncomfortable things. But if it's the less of
Speaker 1: the if it's lesser bad to yourself. For me, smoking
Speaker 1: pot is less evil than drinking for me, some people
Speaker 1: might be the other way around. To me, blieve you,
Speaker 1: for a while was less bad than drinking. Then that
Speaker 1: got too bad because I was getting mouth sores and
Speaker 1: like my sore throat was sore, and I was tired
Speaker 1: of cleaning toilets. Okay, So then now I'm going to
Speaker 1: switch to this other thing like I'm always and that's
Speaker 1: that's okay. Well, the addiction is switching, like that's an
Speaker 1: addiction in itself. Of I don't think that that is no,
Speaker 1: I think that well. I I know that I'm dealing
Speaker 1: with feelings of discomfort when I want to reach for
Speaker 1: the food, when I want to reach for the pot,
Speaker 1: I just having an uncomfortable feeling, and I want to
Speaker 1: feel something else, even if I reached from music to
Speaker 1: go like, um, I just don't want to think right now.
Speaker 1: I want to put on music like it's something to
Speaker 1: kill the thoughts that I'm having because I'm uncomfortable with them.
Speaker 1: And that's okay, Like it's okay to have it's okay
Speaker 1: to have addictions. You're not a bad there's nothing wrong
Speaker 1: with you. It's like we're constantly seeking other things to
Speaker 1: distract us. It's you know, I always say, though, if
Speaker 1: you're being like I can't believe a smoke pot. I
Speaker 1: can't believe it drinks so much. I got wasted last night.
Speaker 1: Let's just say, if you didn't get wasted, you might
Speaker 1: have beat your children, you might have kicked your dog,
Speaker 1: you might have cut yourself. These things are might be
Speaker 1: worse than what you did. So maybe you were doing
Speaker 1: the best thing you could do and that's okay. Does
Speaker 1: any of this presentate with you, Yeah, for sure. I
Speaker 1: mean I think the idea of having I guess you
Speaker 1: could call them healthy addictions, although you know, any healthy
Speaker 1: addiction can become unhealthy depending on how when your life
Speaker 1: becomes unmanageable. You know, Um, this class helps me tremendously
Speaker 1: in the sense of it gives me structure which then
Speaker 1: I could apply to my life. And like, I just
Speaker 1: feel like it's the first time I took a workouts
Speaker 1: because I've done CrossFit, I've done like other kind of
Speaker 1: things where it starts out like, oh, I'm into this,
Speaker 1: and then they go you could do a little bit
Speaker 1: more weight than that you could do, and then it
Speaker 1: becomes like man man upping kind of ship again. And
Speaker 1: it's like stats are on the board. Yes, now no
Speaker 1: it doesn't, but they do have stat stuff. But it's
Speaker 1: like for your own heart rate like like what you
Speaker 1: are percentage wise, and there's a little bit of like
Speaker 1: come on, you could do you could do more in regards,
Speaker 1: but it's not like meat headed like I've been around
Speaker 1: like a lot of meat off the treadmill because you're
Speaker 1: trying to run fast in front of Brenna. Does it
Speaker 1: feel like was that feeling that you got before you
Speaker 1: started sprinting that time where you got injured? Do you
Speaker 1: feel that ever? Now? No? I don't. I don't even
Speaker 1: though I did jump as high as I could it,
Speaker 1: but like the idea like, no, it doesn't feel like
Speaker 1: there was whatever that was about getting past the fear
Speaker 1: in that way instead of trying to prove something to
Speaker 1: someone like becoming a fear of like I can't jump
Speaker 1: this as opposed to like if I jump this then
Speaker 1: everyone will like me. Yeah, yeah, it was, honestly it was.
Speaker 1: It's just like a way to like push yourself without
Speaker 1: that like fucking like you could do you could do
Speaker 1: more weight, and then that's how you get hurt. Number one.
Speaker 1: That's how like like the I like you don't do
Speaker 1: good form, then you're not doing it correctly. Like there's
Speaker 1: so many reasons so like this is good because it
Speaker 1: pushes you without that like extra like just there's just
Speaker 1: something about like it sounds like what I'm trying that
Speaker 1: it's it's motivated of like, no, you can do this.
Speaker 1: This isn't about like prove it, you fucking pussy. It's
Speaker 1: like what's stopping you from thinking? That looks like a
Speaker 1: crazy amount, but we know you can do it and
Speaker 1: it's not gonna hurt you, like trust that this is
Speaker 1: okay and that you are capable of this. It's conquering
Speaker 1: fear as opposed to, uh, trying to be better than
Speaker 1: trying to prove yourself. When we conquer fears, I feel
Speaker 1: like even me signing up for this dancing when I
Speaker 1: they asked me to do it, I'm having flashbacks of
Speaker 1: Dancing with the Stars. I'm having flashbacks of getting trashed
Speaker 1: on that fucking podcast about my Bob Saget song. Like
Speaker 1: I'm having all these fears like if people see me
Speaker 1: do this dance, which once I saw the dance, I'm like, well,
Speaker 1: this is not as cool as the Lizzo Like in
Speaker 1: the minute, I'm gonnaita sentiment that that's a really cool
Speaker 1: dance where she's like, no, this one is like I
Speaker 1: feel the earth and the moon and the stars and
Speaker 1: the sky, and I'm doing things like this and it's
Speaker 1: jazzy and I try and it's like a little bit embarrassing.
Speaker 1: But I was like, honestly, if I learned this dance,
Speaker 1: I will feel so good about myself. And I am
Speaker 1: scared of this, so I'm saying yes to it because
Speaker 1: everything in me is going, don't do this. But I
Speaker 1: learned the hard way when I did the first pitch
Speaker 1: that also scared me. And again, like Dancing with the Stars,
Speaker 1: I did it. It did not go the way I
Speaker 1: wanted to. I was humiliated. No matter how much people
Speaker 1: say it wasn't that bad, I personally was deeply humiliated
Speaker 1: by it. And I was talking about it in therapy
Speaker 1: with Chris yesterday because that was a day that oh
Speaker 1: my god, I was so fucked up that day. So
Speaker 1: that day I was you know, I did two days
Speaker 1: of press in New York for three days in a row.
Speaker 1: That just broke me. I mean, I told you guys
Speaker 1: both like I, if I did the podcast, I'll start
Speaker 1: crying because I'm just so tired. I can't even I
Speaker 1: can't do it. And um, and I've only been that
Speaker 1: much exhausted from work in the past. One time when
Speaker 1: I went to the Comedy Seller in two thousand, like thirteen,
Speaker 1: and I was trying to do stand up and Nicki
Speaker 1: and Sarah alive and right all day, And one day
Speaker 1: I started up the Seller to do a set, and
Speaker 1: I was just like, I can't, Like I didn't even
Speaker 1: know what was happening to me. It was truly like
Speaker 1: Lindsay Lohan hospitalized for exhaustion. So on the heels of
Speaker 1: that New York trip, I fly right home on Friday
Speaker 1: after Thursday night, I'm on Watch What Happens Live. I
Speaker 1: go out with Cured and Shipgun and those friends. I
Speaker 1: like a good night, but it's still like a late night.
Speaker 1: I packed. My flight is at fucking five in the
Speaker 1: I get up picked up at five in the morning
Speaker 1: from the hotel I land. I haven't you know, I
Speaker 1: have to do the podcast, have an hour sleep, and
Speaker 1: then go to this Cardinals day game, which I'm embarrassed by.
Speaker 1: Ak a like the way Noah is when she has
Speaker 1: a party thrown for any kind of attention that she
Speaker 1: didn't feel like she earned, Like is that right, Noah?
Speaker 1: Like having your birthday party bar Mitzka, that kind of thing,
Speaker 1: like at a wedding. You're just like, what I didn't
Speaker 1: like get a degree. I just got someone to love me, Like,
Speaker 1: I don't need all the attention. Yeah, I just don't
Speaker 1: like the spotlight. Yeah. I related to you on on
Speaker 1: that Nikki Glazer day. But I couldn't say that because
Speaker 1: it was such a gift that was being given to
Speaker 1: me and people are worked so hard, and it was
Speaker 1: for me to be anything like I don't want to
Speaker 1: do this, like this is embarrassing, would be really hurtful
Speaker 1: to the people that put so much effort into this.
Speaker 1: And prior to I'm trying to make this quick, prior
Speaker 1: to me doing the Cardinals game, and this whole Nicky
Speaker 1: Glazer Day came to be. I sent the email to Chris,
Speaker 1: my boyfriend because he loves the Cardinals, and was like, hey, um,
Speaker 1: what do you think of the schedule, all the press interviews,
Speaker 1: all the things of doing at the Cardinals game? And
Speaker 1: he was like, you would be cool maybe to throw
Speaker 1: out T shirts with Fred Bird or whatever. And I
Speaker 1: think I've talked about this before, but I really examined
Speaker 1: what happened that day, and I was like, oh, my god.
Speaker 1: I would love that the girls are hot. You get
Speaker 1: to wear short little shorts, you get to like be
Speaker 1: on the dugout and like throw T shirts and be
Speaker 1: like wow, and like it's kind of like being a
Speaker 1: Hooters girl, but like in a tasteful way. With fred Bird.
Speaker 1: I was like, oh my god, that would be so
Speaker 1: fun when I and I really was going home about it,
Speaker 1: and then Chris was like, okay, and that was his suggestion,
Speaker 1: and I said yes to it, and I was meaningful
Speaker 1: of it. I followed up with him being like, oh, yeah,
Speaker 1: to make sure that because he's talking to people, he's like,
Speaker 1: I'm getting involved. I was like, make sure you do
Speaker 1: the T shirt thing. So again, I'm like, do the
Speaker 1: T shirt thing again. I'm thinking in my head that
Speaker 1: was his idea, but I'm into it. And then the
Speaker 1: day I throw the pitch, it doesn't go well. I
Speaker 1: can't I can't cry about it because I then I say,
Speaker 1: it seemed like an ingrade. I don't want to be.
Speaker 1: I don't want people to feel sorry for me. I
Speaker 1: just want to like get through it. And then I
Speaker 1: have to go do this, you know, slingshot, these T
Speaker 1: shirts with these hot girls. I'm feeling fucking big, and
Speaker 1: I saw like myself in my outfit, I did not
Speaker 1: look small. I looked old compared to these girls Like
Speaker 1: I just all the shame of that pitch started going
Speaker 1: to my looks and my athletics proudness, and like, who
Speaker 1: do you think you are? People this game think you're
Speaker 1: a joke. No one cares about Nikki Glazer. Everyone's like
Speaker 1: embarrassed that you're even doing this. They're probably like, what
Speaker 1: does Nicki Glazer day? Like? Stop? And so I'm waiting
Speaker 1: in the wings before going out to do the T
Speaker 1: shirt and I am in no mood to do this,
Speaker 1: and I'm trying to keep it together, but I'm kind
Speaker 1: of projected. I'm so mad that I can't accept that
Speaker 1: I have done this to myself. I agreed to this.
Speaker 1: I was the one that was like, yes, Chris, I
Speaker 1: want to do that idea you had. I can't accept
Speaker 1: that because if I do, then I start going like
Speaker 1: I have to. I'm so embarrassed about the pitch. I
Speaker 1: have to blame someone for it. It cannot be my fault.
Speaker 1: It has to be they didn't let me practice. They
Speaker 1: wanted me to do this, and I was coursed into it.
Speaker 1: I don't even want to do this this fucking like
Speaker 1: because then they're going the slingshot thing is a lot
Speaker 1: harder than it looks, and I'm like, oh, great, a
Speaker 1: fucking another thing that I'm I'm like, I don't even
Speaker 1: want you to tell me how to do it, so
Speaker 1: I have an excuse for when I do it poorly,
Speaker 1: I can blame you for not telling it to me.
Speaker 1: And so I start kind of getting an attitude towards Chris,
Speaker 1: who's with me, because he's you know, you tru the
Speaker 1: people you love the most, you like take it out
Speaker 1: on them because you know they're gonna be there for
Speaker 1: you regardless, and they love you, so you start being
Speaker 1: a brat to them, and so I'm just like, I
Speaker 1: don't even want to do this, like like you know,
Speaker 1: when I get I'm kind of alone with Chris and
Speaker 1: one other guy that I'm like, he won't tell anyone,
Speaker 1: I'm being a little ingreat and I'm just like, yeah,
Speaker 1: I guess I'm writing, Yeah it's raining outside, cool, Yeah
Speaker 1: I look look like I was just being abraut, like
Speaker 1: gonna funk it up and just look stupid again and
Speaker 1: trying I'm like letting out and he's kind of like,
Speaker 1: are you mad at me because you're doing this? Like
Speaker 1: and in my head, I'm like, yeah, it was your
Speaker 1: fucking idea. You added this to my day and you
Speaker 1: don't know how tired I am and you're not looking
Speaker 1: out for me, and I'm like And later on that
Speaker 1: came up as like I felt really weird that day.
Speaker 1: It felt like you were like making it like I
Speaker 1: forced you to do this thing, and like and I go, yeah,
Speaker 1: I did make it that way. Like when I re examined,
Speaker 1: did I go, oh my god, you got me in
Speaker 1: the world. I was being the biggest brat. You got
Speaker 1: me in my baby. I was being a baby because
Speaker 1: I was tired, so I had no way to be
Speaker 1: like strong emotionally. I was embarrassed, which makes me like you,
Speaker 1: you know, you trip over something on the sidewalk and
Speaker 1: you go, what a funk because you're so embarrassed. When
Speaker 1: you get embarrassed, yeah, you get you you either get
Speaker 1: angry or you get like, oh I'm meant to do that.
Speaker 1: You get killed, or you get angry like this wasn't
Speaker 1: my decision at all. Yes, And so that's what I did.
Speaker 1: I was like, and so I explained him last night.
Speaker 1: I was like, I, you're so right. I was blaming
Speaker 1: you for that because I couldn't blame myself because I
Speaker 1: was already so embarrassed. I had to give the blame
Speaker 1: to someone. And he goes, but I just suggested it. You.
Speaker 1: You were the one that was like, I want to
Speaker 1: do it, and you were enthusiastic, and I was like, yeah,
Speaker 1: you're right, it's fucking I was like, because he goes.
Speaker 1: It was interesting because he said I like sometimes we
Speaker 1: say things to each other that we just go That
Speaker 1: felt really good to hear, like I needed to hear that.
Speaker 1: I didn't know I needed to hear that. I told
Speaker 1: him once that, you know, because I meet a lot
Speaker 1: of hot guys and guys that on paper seem like
Speaker 1: really like amazing and maybe from afar, like they're like
Speaker 1: celebrities that I've maybe like drooled over or like I
Speaker 1: like their character, and then I meet them and I'm
Speaker 1: just like, I give them a lot more than they
Speaker 1: deserve because I don't know them, I've projected a lot
Speaker 1: onto them, they're hot whatever. And there was something about
Speaker 1: Chris and going to therapy with me and like really
Speaker 1: working on himself and being emotionally vulnerable that I was,
Speaker 1: like I told him one day, I was like, every
Speaker 1: time I see a hot guy now that I might
Speaker 1: project a lot of like perfection onto of like or
Speaker 1: I start getting in those what ifs I dated him.
Speaker 1: If I'm having a bad day with Chris or whatever
Speaker 1: it is, I always see a little meter above their
Speaker 1: head now that is on zero for like emotional intelligence,
Speaker 1: because I just haven't met someone to me that's willing
Speaker 1: to be as nimble and like doing uncomfortable things emotionally
Speaker 1: that Chris has. And I was like, for me, your
Speaker 1: meter is on like nine, like you've got but you
Speaker 1: you challenge yourself, and like I just I don't. I
Speaker 1: don't let guys start out on like nines anymore. They
Speaker 1: have to prove a nine. To me, they're all on zero.
Speaker 1: And he was like, there's something about that that really
Speaker 1: made me feel safe, like because I'm sure there is
Speaker 1: a part of him that's like you're famous. Now you're
Speaker 1: gonna meet guys that are very shiny and like if
Speaker 1: we're having a bad day and you go on set
Speaker 1: with someone who's like fun and like flirtatious and like
Speaker 1: you've seen him before on paparazzi shots and he looks
Speaker 1: so cool and like maybe he played emotionally evolved character,
Speaker 1: like you might give him a lot more than he deserves.
Speaker 1: And I'm like, no, I don't do that anymore, Like
Speaker 1: I I have everyone starting at zero. You have to
Speaker 1: earn that to me, And he was like that made
Speaker 1: me feel really good. And then the other night he
Speaker 1: had told me that, like, no matter what, I just
Speaker 1: know you're a good person. I always and if anyone
Speaker 1: were to ever say you're a bitch, I would really
Speaker 1: I think I mentioned this before it just he goes,
Speaker 1: I would never let someone call you a bit I
Speaker 1: think a lot of times like people can say that
Speaker 1: women are bitches are like maybe in the past. I
Speaker 1: don't think he said this, but he could maybe think
Speaker 1: I was or like maybe I was up to no
Speaker 1: good or like was out for myself. He was like,
Speaker 1: I know that you're a good person, and there's just
Speaker 1: something about that that made me feel the same way
Speaker 1: that dumb meter thing I said. I was just like, Okay,
Speaker 1: if we're on that base level where you can even
Speaker 1: though I make you mad and some days I can
Speaker 1: seem like a bitch, if you can get to the
Speaker 1: place of like, her bitchiness is coming not because she's
Speaker 1: inherently a bad person, it's something's something's up that's making
Speaker 1: that happen. I can always be okay being myself or
Speaker 1: like that I have I have the freedom to be
Speaker 1: a bit sometimes because you know, I'm not one, and
Speaker 1: that that day I'm It's Halloween, you know, and I'm
Speaker 1: dressing up as a bit, and there's just something very
Speaker 1: nice about having that. Do you really, is there anything
Speaker 1: that you've been given like that where you go, oh,
Speaker 1: I didn't know I needed to hear that compliment or
Speaker 1: I needed to hear Brenna say that. Is there anything
Speaker 1: that stretch you? Well? What strikes me is the suggestion thing,
Speaker 1: the idea that like, I've done things where like someone
Speaker 1: will suggest something that I don't want to do it,
Speaker 1: but I do it and then I take it out
Speaker 1: on They don't deserve the anger or whatever, but because
Speaker 1: I agreed to it. And so I've done that many
Speaker 1: times in my life where someone's like, hey, let's go
Speaker 1: do this and I'm like yeah, instead of having like
Speaker 1: uh not an argument or a disagreement about wanting to
Speaker 1: do it, or like maybe I'll feel guilty because they'll
Speaker 1: be like, well, I thought it would be a good idea,
Speaker 1: and so then you just do it. And then you're
Speaker 1: there at the thing and you're like, what the anyway
Speaker 1: you forced me to do it? Because I was trying
Speaker 1: to be nice and I and I'm scared that you're
Speaker 1: gonna get bad at me if I'm not nice. That
Speaker 1: is still you What if that person would get mad
Speaker 1: at you? Like, okay, well then deal with that, like
Speaker 1: stop people, please. Where I've gotten to or I'm trying
Speaker 1: to is like, even if I do put myself in
Speaker 1: that predicament that I don't want to be in, I go,
Speaker 1: it's not there. It's stop pointing. Just stop pointing. Start
Speaker 1: maybe learn a lesson of not saying yes too quickly
Speaker 1: to things or being okay with when you get to
Speaker 1: something going like I can it's okay for me to
Speaker 1: not like this, even if I thought I once was
Speaker 1: gonna like it, it's okay. It doesn't mean that I'm like,
Speaker 1: here's the other crazy thing. You might really love it?
Speaker 1: Oh yeah, I know. That's why Chris was talking about
Speaker 1: pickle ball yesterday, and I just don't want to play
Speaker 1: pickleball because I'm nervous about being unathletic around his family
Speaker 1: who is athletic and like holds like that in high esteem.
Speaker 1: Like I think I have this fear that they're going
Speaker 1: to reject me as one of them if they see
Speaker 1: how unathletically and cline I am. So I'd rather just
Speaker 1: not be there and and have them not even think
Speaker 1: of me, as opposed to going and being like, oh,
Speaker 1: I don't need to play. Then they go, well, maybe
Speaker 1: she's bad. Maybe we need like a montage where we
Speaker 1: go and play pickleball and and you get really good
Speaker 1: and you just show up like it would be so
Speaker 1: funny to train. I'm not kidding you. I think I
Speaker 1: might start taking to pick the ball lessons and then
Speaker 1: show up one day. He does, how watch my poet.
Speaker 1: This would be amazing. Please do not tell him that
Speaker 1: is a good idea. And I think I'm going to
Speaker 1: do it as a Oh I love it. Okay, let's
Speaker 1: go to break and come back with all fan tracks
Speaker 1: all day long. All right, we're back. Let's get to it.
Speaker 1: We're supposed to do an all fan track show, but
Speaker 1: you guys know, we get all found tangents, so the
Speaker 1: rest of the show will be all fan tracks, but
Speaker 1: it's you know, it's a regular size segment. Let's do it.
Speaker 1: You guys seriously need to look at the YouTube of
Speaker 1: this because I'm covering myself in all the the things
Speaker 1: I got just in fucking New Jersey this weekend. So
Speaker 1: many letters, This beautiful painting that bestie made of her parent.
Speaker 1: She has a cockatoo that has a shirt on that
Speaker 1: she made it a little like you know, um vest
Speaker 1: that says bestie on it, so her parrot. I forget
Speaker 1: the parrots, same bestie. It says don't be cut. On
Speaker 1: the frame. It says the Nikolaser podcast. She did the
Speaker 1: logo that from the T shirt, which besties have been
Speaker 1: wearing that T shirt, the Nikkei Layser podcast t shirts.
Speaker 1: They're so fucking cute. I love them. I love our merch.
Speaker 1: It says mascot because this this I forget. Oh it's
Speaker 1: miss Marilyn Monroe is the name of the parrot, and
Speaker 1: I want to thank that bestie. I forget her name,
Speaker 1: but she was lovely and we're gonna hang this up. Um,
Speaker 1: you know, I got so many cards, let me just
Speaker 1: pick one at random. Noah, can I read a letter?
Speaker 1: That one of our best he's wrote to you. It's
Speaker 1: there's a bracelet in it, a moonstone bracelet. It says
Speaker 1: dear Noah, and she got your name right. N o
Speaker 1: A is just in case Bessie's want to know know what.
Speaker 1: You are one of the most genuinely kindest person I
Speaker 1: have ever people I've ever met. You're so soft spoken,
Speaker 1: and sometimes I wish I could be, but that's not
Speaker 1: for me. You have so many unique things about you,
Speaker 1: and just that makes you one of the greatest and interesting,
Speaker 1: most interesting people I know. You've taught me to look
Speaker 1: at situations differently and to take different perspectives into account.
Speaker 1: I see this when you chime in when Nicki and
Speaker 1: Andrew have a disagreement. You have such great ideas for
Speaker 1: the pod and are so creative and make the pods
Speaker 1: such a fun experience. Love your white board, by the
Speaker 1: way you do things and ask so politely and just
Speaker 1: show how great of that just shows how great of
Speaker 1: a person you are. Reminds me to be more patient.
Speaker 1: Love obvious voice in the fant Rex segment, which is
Speaker 1: my favorite because hearing other besties stories and connections makes
Speaker 1: me so happy for them that they also have a
Speaker 1: space in this podcast. I can't wait to meet you someday,
Speaker 1: but keep killing it. Jeesasi love Edith and she was
Speaker 1: at the Madison nine PM show, so shout out to Edith.
Speaker 1: She wrote us all letters Andrew got his mind. I
Speaker 1: haven't read read it on another one, but yes, I
Speaker 1: feel that way about Noah and I love that Noah,
Speaker 1: you know, sometimes gets zero airtime on episodes because we
Speaker 1: are just chatterboxes, but people still like that letter. I
Speaker 1: almost like, I cannot believe how how they get they
Speaker 1: get her so much. That is that is Noah to
Speaker 1: a fucking tea of being patient, thoughtful, flawed, open about
Speaker 1: her flaws, are standing working on herself, like Noah is
Speaker 1: dividing balls with her nose, admitting adorable things, her adorable voice,
Speaker 1: someone who was just such a good friend, was such
Speaker 1: a good friend to me. The other night when I,
Speaker 1: you know, reach out to her about something that we
Speaker 1: were going to talk about offline, she shared this thing
Speaker 1: that she's going through with me, and we were talking
Speaker 1: about it and sharing and it was just so so
Speaker 1: nice to catch up in that way. And then you know,
Speaker 1: it's so like Noah does, like she shares this thing
Speaker 1: that like should take up hours of our conversation and
Speaker 1: dissecting going through and then I share a little something
Speaker 1: like just a little like yeah, I've actually been feeling
Speaker 1: that way about this, and she's like, wait, what's going
Speaker 1: on with that? And then it turns then we talked
Speaker 1: for so much longer about my dumb little thing, and
Speaker 1: it was just like if it wasn't dumb. No one
Speaker 1: never makes me feel dumb about my problem. She never
Speaker 1: makes me feel like I'm not being a good friend
Speaker 1: to her, even though there are times where I go like, man,
Speaker 1: i haven't checked in in a while. All I do
Speaker 1: is work with her. You're just to really just a
Speaker 1: gem of a person and so good, damn good at
Speaker 1: your general girl. I love to hear that. You don't
Speaker 1: want to hear adorable. Yes, it's so, it's but I
Speaker 1: love that Edith saw you so completely in that. Let's
Speaker 1: get to um, Let's get to some of our messages.
Speaker 1: Voice all right, I'm want to start off with Nick
Speaker 1: from Germany. You're gonna love this. Hi, Andrew, NICKI and Noah.
Speaker 1: I'm Nick and I'm a bestie from Germany. And I
Speaker 1: wanted to tell you a mispronunciation and cursed story today.
Speaker 1: A few weeks ago, a friend came back home from
Speaker 1: the US where she lived the past year, and somehow
Speaker 1: it's very common that Germans who lived abroad sometimes pretend
Speaker 1: they don't know German words anymore. So a few days
Speaker 1: ago Germany's Next Top Model. It's the German version of
Speaker 1: Next Top Model by Tyra Banks. If you know that show,
Speaker 1: it's very huge here in Germany and they are all
Speaker 1: about diversity this year, so there are some fatigued plus
Speaker 1: size or best ages, you know. And my friends said
Speaker 1: as we watch, oh, I love that there is so much.
Speaker 1: I don't know the German word viarity this year. I
Speaker 1: told her, first, bitch, you are so for pretending to
Speaker 1: not know your native language anymore, and second, you don't
Speaker 1: know the English word either variety. So that's my little story.
Speaker 1: I hope you guys have all the swells. I love
Speaker 1: you guys, love the Oh my god, what the hell
Speaker 1: that is that that guy went and recorded a just
Speaker 1: kidding from the podcast to use it on I mean
Speaker 1: that nick standing ovation for that. Thank you so much. All.
Speaker 1: I want to watch Germany's Next Up because that show
Speaker 1: is not big in the US anymore like it used to.
Speaker 1: Be but man, when that show was like popular, it
Speaker 1: was so fun to watch, So it would be kind
Speaker 1: of cool to watch a country that really is obsessed
Speaker 1: with that show still and like puts that much effort
Speaker 1: into it and cares that much. It might be a
Speaker 1: good watch. Um. That reminds me so much of the
Speaker 1: Ilari Abaldwin thing of when she's on the Today Show
Speaker 1: and she goes how you say cucumber like during the
Speaker 1: segment because she speaks Spanish so much, I will say
Speaker 1: that there who told me that? When you do speak
Speaker 1: maybe sometimes the way that you besties say that. Sometimes
Speaker 1: you say my friend Nicky and people are like, who's
Speaker 1: your friend Nicki? And you're like, oh, I'm not really
Speaker 1: friends which podcast? It's how I feel about Reddit sometimes,
Speaker 1: where I'm like, did a friend tell me this? Or
Speaker 1: just these people being so open um. Someone said in
Speaker 1: a Reddit defending her, I think it was that that
Speaker 1: when you speak another language sometimes so much you do
Speaker 1: forget the English word. I think your friend was trying
Speaker 1: to be kid, but I want to give the benefit
Speaker 1: of the doubt that sometimes you just you can't make
Speaker 1: that translation. And I almost give yet that benefit of
Speaker 1: the doubt. Maybe she did forget how you say cucumber um? Also,
Speaker 1: but also how do you say is probably how you
Speaker 1: would say if your native English speaker, you wouldn't say
Speaker 1: how you say, you know, Like, I also think that's
Speaker 1: suspicious to do the English like a foreigner. I'm thinking
Speaker 1: about how many times I've said variety and it's really
Speaker 1: only with like cereal or potato chips. Yeah, Like, it's
Speaker 1: not a word I say a lot. So I give
Speaker 1: her to benefit doubt because that is not a word
Speaker 1: that I if I forget it, but necessarily even diversity,
Speaker 1: Like he's saying, like she could have picked any German
Speaker 1: word that is like has a lot of different cultures
Speaker 1: or like has a lot of different whatever it was
Speaker 1: she could have she I have a feeling Nick knows
Speaker 1: this friend better than we do. This friend is capable
Speaker 1: of which does not make them a bad person. I'm wondering, Nick,
Speaker 1: if you actually did say, and if she goes, what
Speaker 1: does that mean? And you try to explain it because
Speaker 1: a lot of times when you call out, it's such
Speaker 1: an insult once you really explain it to someone, like
Speaker 1: I think you're trying to be cool right now that
Speaker 1: it's hard to like actually kill someone who you have
Speaker 1: to then explain what kurd means. It's easy to kill
Speaker 1: a revving engine because you just go kill and the
Speaker 1: person is kind of like that sounded shitty, but I
Speaker 1: don't know what it means. Um, maybe you just thought it,
Speaker 1: but I want to know if you really did kill
Speaker 1: your friend and what the in Germany or German in
Speaker 1: Germany variety. Okay, let's go to the next one. Okay,
Speaker 1: here's one from Ida. Hey, besties, hope you're having a
Speaker 1: good day having all the swells everybody else as well.
Speaker 1: I was just listening to the mullet House episode and
Speaker 1: the conversation of the fact that, uh, the word pussy
Speaker 1: and the word pussy sounds the same or similar, I
Speaker 1: should say, um, is kind of funny. So I actually
Speaker 1: have a story. Um. I was working at a hotel
Speaker 1: and I had a very bad I think it was
Speaker 1: like a cut on my finger or something like that,
Speaker 1: and my manager was standing next to me. Uh, and
Speaker 1: I'm a little bit of an odd duck. I'll kind
Speaker 1: of just randomly shout things out loud. What I you know,
Speaker 1: saw that my finger was pussy, And I say out loud,
Speaker 1: my finger is so pussy. And my manager just looked
Speaker 1: at me, laughed and walked away. Um, so that was
Speaker 1: pretty funny. I hope you guys are having a good day.
Speaker 1: I love you all. It's all. It's so funny, Eida,
Speaker 1: because almost if you were to say my cut looks
Speaker 1: like a pussy, it would be less disgusting than saying pussy,
Speaker 1: because puss is such a gross word on its own,
Speaker 1: it's almost worse than pussy. I love you that you
Speaker 1: call yourself an odd duck. I think that's a very gentle,
Speaker 1: sweet way to describe like what you know. Sometimes I go,
Speaker 1: I'm a weirdo. Sorry, I'm just weird, and it's like
Speaker 1: really derogatory, and like I always feel like an odd
Speaker 1: duck too with some of the things anxieties I have
Speaker 1: some of the weird things. I'm just like, I just
Speaker 1: don't like that, and I'm I'm just weird. Sorry, I'm
Speaker 1: just stupid. I just don't like it. And it's a
Speaker 1: gentler way to be like just an odd duct because
Speaker 1: ducks are so cute. I love that. And I want
Speaker 1: to know what other things you scream out loud sometimes, Um,
Speaker 1: but I do. And I also want to know if
Speaker 1: you followed if your manager, if you ever went back
Speaker 1: to your manager to be like, I was talking about
Speaker 1: this cut on my hand and it looks like like
Speaker 1: I wonder if it looked like a pussy too, because
Speaker 1: a lot of times the pussies do look like wounds.
Speaker 1: I mean, I think, Yeah, I'm trying to think of
Speaker 1: other like words that we could use, maybe for when
Speaker 1: you feel you know different, aut no like a nice no.
Speaker 1: Autistic is actually makes me feel nice because it's like
Speaker 1: it's not my fault and odd duck. What's another example?
Speaker 1: There was a great Reddit I was reading, Um, maybe
Speaker 1: I can just pull it up real quick. Sorry, now,
Speaker 1: are spending a lot of time on Reddit. I'd go
Speaker 1: every single night just like this is the eight reference.
Speaker 1: It's where I get everything. I don't understand what people
Speaker 1: do if they're not on Reddit. It's it's the cutest,
Speaker 1: most fun stuff. Oh there was Okay, let me just
Speaker 1: pull this up because this was so what's your favorite euphemist?
Speaker 1: This is different, but it says what's your favorite euphemism
Speaker 1: for a dumb person? And this is another way of like,
Speaker 1: you know, just like funny phrases. I could give them
Speaker 1: a penny for their thoughts. And I'd ask, and i'd
Speaker 1: get I could give them a penny for their thoughts,
Speaker 1: and I'd get changed back. Someone said, a beautiful lamp,
Speaker 1: but it sure isn't shining much. My great grandmother used
Speaker 1: to just say that he's got two brain cells left
Speaker 1: and they're fighting for third place. The wheel is spinning,
Speaker 1: but the hamsters dead. That made me. I love that.
Speaker 1: They sound like dr philis. Ums. You're the reason we've
Speaker 1: now listen. You're the reason we have worn in labels. Um.
Speaker 1: They have um. They must have put your swing too
Speaker 1: close to a wall as a kid. You're Oh, this
Speaker 1: one's good, honey, You're less useful than a chocolate teapot. Yeah,
Speaker 1: it's so good. Um, all right, let me just read
Speaker 1: this one really quickly. I just opened this randomly. This
Speaker 1: is from a bestie I think in Montclair, New Jersey.
Speaker 1: From a bestie. It says she printed this up. It
Speaker 1: looks like a newsletter. There's pictures of us on it.
Speaker 1: It looks like like, oh, like my synagogues newsletter. Yes,
Speaker 1: it does look like that. It's from bestie Kristen Um
Speaker 1: on Instagram. She's fly Underscore Yellow Underscore Bird Underscore Fly
Speaker 1: Fly Yellow Bird Fly Hi, Nik, congratulations on your well
Speaker 1: to serve success. And it is so jackpot that someone
Speaker 1: like you with such such a great grand platform chooses
Speaker 1: to be a voice for all animals. Your message for
Speaker 1: kindness and respect to animals is reaching so many of this.
Speaker 1: I remember meeting her, she gave me Vegan shirts too,
Speaker 1: and your enlightenment is undoubtedly helping animals in some way
Speaker 1: across the world. God bless folks like you, Ricky your vase,
Speaker 1: and at Leasha Silverstone. Hell fucking us, I didn't realize
Speaker 1: this was going to be like such a um like.
Speaker 1: I'm not choosing this because I'm like, guys, look how
Speaker 1: sweet I am. It is pure enjoyment to throw in
Speaker 1: my air pods and spend an hour with no Drukie
Speaker 1: and other best das while I am going through my day.
Speaker 1: Thank you for this podcast. Listeners benefit from your encouragement
Speaker 1: to dare share and bear our feelings. I love dare
Speaker 1: share bear what oh that's got to be a segment
Speaker 1: name that is good with which foster's healthy relationships of
Speaker 1: our own and in between sweet belly laughs. You're even
Speaker 1: still beliefs in those still striving to reach a goal
Speaker 1: and confidence in those contemplating a change. What's more, you
Speaker 1: often suggest tools to deal with guilt and temptation and
Speaker 1: resources for those wanting to incorporate better health and wellness
Speaker 1: into everyday life. You all absolutely rock. Thanks again for
Speaker 1: all you do. Also just to share, sorry Andrew Nikki,
Speaker 1: please please careful with that cute baby talk voice. Sometimes
Speaker 1: it seems like you're going to send Andrew into outer space,
Speaker 1: like the sound is a feather to his taint or something.
Speaker 1: What does that mean? And I talked like this apparently
Speaker 1: I'm turned on by it. Oh um oh, and then
Speaker 1: she signs up. Oh, she said she saw us at
Speaker 1: the Walmont Theater in New Jersey, which was the most
Speaker 1: best the attended event I've ever done. And uh she
Speaker 1: signed off, just don't eat animals, thank you very much,
Speaker 1: bestie Kristen Um and she put little pictures of us.
Speaker 1: It was so nice. I don't even know where you
Speaker 1: get pink paper. That's like, I don't remember doing baby
Speaker 1: voices or you responding words. That must have been one
Speaker 1: episode that I just can't remember. And I came a lot.
Speaker 1: I do remember that episode. It was a lot of coming. Yeah,
Speaker 1: it was like a Shakespearean because that was with, Yeah,
Speaker 1: it wasn't about me, but it was daring the baby voice,
Speaker 1: daring um, but it was still wasn't you. I don't
Speaker 1: even like, oh, you know what. It was probably on
Speaker 1: the day where I was doing this, like the talking
Speaker 1: about Elizabeth Holmes. If I was pitching like this, or
Speaker 1: I have an idea for a blood mission, it's that episode. Um,
Speaker 1: let's do another fan thrax. Okay, you want to give
Speaker 1: us a advice. I love to give advice. All right,
Speaker 1: here's a voicemail from Michelle. Hey, Nikki, Andrew, and Noah.
Speaker 1: This is Michelle. I was listening to the podcast where
Speaker 1: you were talking about UM narcissists and alcoholics and how
Speaker 1: you have to stop being friends with them. And I
Speaker 1: have a situation where my childhood friend UM really only
Speaker 1: talks about herself any time we get together. But I
Speaker 1: was wondering how how would you recommend ending that relationship.
Speaker 1: Is it something that you just kind of slowly let
Speaker 1: fizzle out and stop reaching out to that person, or
Speaker 1: is it something where you would have a conversation with them,
Speaker 1: or what has been your experience with ending those types
Speaker 1: of relationships? And any advice you have would be great.
Speaker 1: Thanks by I'll let you take this one first. I
Speaker 1: mean for me, I think it depends if she changes
Speaker 1: what you want to have a friendship. I think you
Speaker 1: have to have a conversation with her first if you
Speaker 1: want to possibly keep it going explained, like how she
Speaker 1: makes you feel, how she doesn't ask you questions, how
Speaker 1: she just talks about herself. And then if she just goes, well,
Speaker 1: you know what, that's who I am, or she goes no,
Speaker 1: I don't and does and dismisses your feelings or cut
Speaker 1: you off. Um, I think you're right, but I also
Speaker 1: part of me goes she I hear the tone of
Speaker 1: her voice. She's done. And you know these people, it's
Speaker 1: almost like maybe you haven't been forthright with them about
Speaker 1: what you're feeling, but you've given them the tests of like,
Speaker 1: let's just see if they ever ask about me in
Speaker 1: this entire hangout, and you've given and you you can
Speaker 1: see you can be friends with them long enough that
Speaker 1: you know that there's something that is unfixable about this,
Speaker 1: or that they don't or maybe they don't take accountability
Speaker 1: for other things in their life. Every breakup they've ever
Speaker 1: had is the guys. But whatever it is, and you
Speaker 1: just know it's not this is not negotiable, or it
Speaker 1: probably is, And maybe you just don't even want to
Speaker 1: be friends with this person anymore, which, by the way,
Speaker 1: you're allowed to not want to be friends with someone.
Speaker 1: You are allowed to not want to be no accu
Speaker 1: doesn't anymore just because they're your cousin or cut things
Speaker 1: off with a brother or something. You are allowed to
Speaker 1: do those things if they aren't serving you anymore. And
Speaker 1: I think people feel so bad because they're like, well,
Speaker 1: I've known her since child, our parents are friends. I
Speaker 1: guess she doesn't have anyone else. She needs to learn
Speaker 1: that if she continues this, she's not gonna have anyone else.
Speaker 1: You don't need to be the one thing that's getting
Speaker 1: her to go. Well, at least I have her. I
Speaker 1: don't have to change. That's actually enabling. I said this before, possibly,
Speaker 1: but the best way a friend has cut it off
Speaker 1: with me is to say, babe, I'm going you can.
Speaker 1: You can, because this person probably is not going to
Speaker 1: ever accept any blame for themselves, and they're going to
Speaker 1: spend it anyway. And it is a youth thing ultimately,
Speaker 1: because you are being friends with someone, you've been friends
Speaker 1: with someone that for a long time has not been
Speaker 1: giving you what you need, which is a you problem. Um.
Speaker 1: As much as you could probably understand that what's the
Speaker 1: girl's name that rotus Megan Michelle Michelle Michelle, I feel
Speaker 1: like just say the next person. The time this person
Speaker 1: writes you, hey, babe, I'm just going through a lot
Speaker 1: right now in my life and I I just need
Speaker 1: some space. It has nothing to do with you, because
Speaker 1: honestly it probably it doesn't. What it has to do
Speaker 1: with is that you have boundaries now and this person
Speaker 1: isn't living up to them. So and if you make
Speaker 1: it about them, they're gonna get defensive, They're gonna come
Speaker 1: at you and try to change, They're gonna like keep going.
Speaker 1: You set a boundary of babe, I need some space, um,
Speaker 1: And I just don't think I'm gonna be able to
Speaker 1: hang out for a really long for a bit, and
Speaker 1: I'll let you know when i'm ready to again. That way,
Speaker 1: if they keep reaching out to you, it's done now.
Speaker 1: Maybe this person and you share friends and you're like,
Speaker 1: now I got to cut out all those people. No,
Speaker 1: you don't. You're allowed to cut out people in your life.
Speaker 1: You're allowed to and it might be awkward. It is
Speaker 1: a hard thing to do saying the word babe or
Speaker 1: whatever kind of loving thing you can say, doing in
Speaker 1: a loving way, taking accountability for that. This is your decision.
Speaker 1: There's nothing they could have done or do. But if
Speaker 1: you want to repair this, I think writing an email,
Speaker 1: preparing like writing a letter and getting it, getting it
Speaker 1: all out where you won't get interrupted like I did
Speaker 1: to Andrew when I telled him to answer this for me, um,
Speaker 1: and he didn't do a good enough job in my mind,
Speaker 1: so I started, No, that wasn't why at all. Um No,
Speaker 1: I think you had a good point, but I just saw, like,
Speaker 1: but I don't want her to have to work it out.
Speaker 1: Sometimes I'm just like, don't try to work this. That
Speaker 1: just happened. But that that's I feel like that happens
Speaker 1: all the time, where then the person doesn't learn. They
Speaker 1: just go, oh, well, all right, they just didn't want
Speaker 1: to hang out with me. I guess nothing's really wrong
Speaker 1: with your job. It's not not your job. But I'm
Speaker 1: just saying that it happened. The person goes, is it
Speaker 1: something I did? Then you can say yes, and you
Speaker 1: can be honest, but wait for them to be curious
Speaker 1: if it's something they can change, because someone who is
Speaker 1: like that's you know what intervention although shows about people
Speaker 1: are saying we are not going to have you in
Speaker 1: our life anymore. Or if you keep using this drug,
Speaker 1: if you keep hurting yourself like I'm out, you need
Speaker 1: to pull your love for people to change because once
Speaker 1: they're once that tent pole comes out, they are a
Speaker 1: tarp on the ground and they have to figure out
Speaker 1: there's some I don't have that support anymore. My point though,
Speaker 1: is that with an intervention, right, there's something concrete, like
Speaker 1: you're taking this drug. We know it's the drug. This
Speaker 1: is it, right? But if it's someone that just talks
Speaker 1: about themselves and doesn't ask about they probably don't really
Speaker 1: even they might not even be aware. So maybe a
Speaker 1: letter just so you can say it all without getting
Speaker 1: sidetracked by them responding and saying everything you want to
Speaker 1: say in a very loving way of like, you know,
Speaker 1: sometimes I go I need a lot more in friendships
Speaker 1: than maybe most people do, and I require people to
Speaker 1: be interested in my life, which I have not felt
Speaker 1: for some reason I haven't felt for maybe you are
Speaker 1: interested in my life and and I'm not interpreting it
Speaker 1: that way. But there's something wrong here and it doesn't
Speaker 1: feel good to hang out with you, and I don't
Speaker 1: want to fake it with you. And maybe it's all me,
Speaker 1: maybe have to work on myself. Maybe we aren't just
Speaker 1: meant to be friends right now. Always lead with like
Speaker 1: love and not a lot of blame, but stating the
Speaker 1: facts of like, I feel like you don't care about
Speaker 1: my life, and I don't want to be friends with
Speaker 1: people who don't care about my life because for me
Speaker 1: my friendships, I care about my friend's life. So when
Speaker 1: you don't care about mine, it's totally fine that you don't,
Speaker 1: but it means I interpret that as you don't you're
Speaker 1: not a good friend to me. And so just you know,
Speaker 1: speaking from you as opposed to speaking from I and
Speaker 1: not so much you would be helpful. Michelle and I
Speaker 1: hope it works out. And I know that's so tough,
Speaker 1: especially if you have friends in common or like places
Speaker 1: of hanging out in common. You might see them around
Speaker 1: friends before just over the things that could have been
Speaker 1: rectified through a conversation. I just said this to Chris
Speaker 1: so hard, though, But I've seen people change after a
Speaker 1: conversation where you're like, oh, I just said to Chris
Speaker 1: the other day, when you when I say something that
Speaker 1: kind of makes you go I didn't like that. Instead
Speaker 1: of um, like what I do a lot of times,
Speaker 1: instead of just going okay, like like that's how I
Speaker 1: do it, I don't say okay. But like he was like,
Speaker 1: I don't say okay, And I'm like, whatever that is
Speaker 1: for you where you hear something and you're just like,
Speaker 1: I'm just gonna ignore that she said that because it's
Speaker 1: so upsetting. Will you try your best to just clear
Speaker 1: up whatever is going through in your head? And he's like, well,
Speaker 1: sometimes that's I'm just not even aware of it. And
Speaker 1: I go, well, you know what I can do when
Speaker 1: I when I feel you may be shutting down, because
Speaker 1: I can feel it immediately. If I bring up something
Speaker 1: and I'm like, wait, what did I say wrong? He
Speaker 1: just dropped the subject. I can then go I'm feeling
Speaker 1: like you didn't like what I just said. Can I
Speaker 1: ask you if that rubbed you the wrong way? And what?
Speaker 1: So we can help each other in real time as
Speaker 1: opposed to just going they're mad at me and then
Speaker 1: creating the story about why they're mad and they're so
Speaker 1: as sensitive and all this stuff, when really it was
Speaker 1: just like a misunderstanding and honestly trying to avoid a fight,
Speaker 1: when really when you try to avoid fights, you make
Speaker 1: such a bigger one down the road. Final thought, I
Speaker 1: know what you said that this just recently happened to you.
Speaker 1: I had yeah, very quickly, because you have an interview.
Speaker 1: A friend broke up with me over email I didn't like.
Speaker 1: And it wasn't because I did anything wrong except um
Speaker 1: that I remained my friends your email. It was what
Speaker 1: was her reasoning. So the reason was, um, she is
Speaker 1: going through a divorce with another friend that I'm friends with,
Speaker 1: her husband her next husband, I guess, and uh, I'm
Speaker 1: still friends with him, and I was still friends with her.
Speaker 1: But in her message she said, right now in my life,
Speaker 1: I can't be friends with anyone who supports this person.
Speaker 1: And you know, I respect her decision. I'm not mad
Speaker 1: at her. I understand this is a life turning event
Speaker 1: for her and whatever her brain is telling her is
Speaker 1: not anything against me. It's just what she has to do.
Speaker 1: So I think you're right about UM just being honest
Speaker 1: in an email, and it was it was not emotional.
Speaker 1: It's just kind of sterile and just very direct, and
Speaker 1: I'm I'm appreciate, you know, I think it's it was
Speaker 1: actually very big of her too, beyond me with it,
Speaker 1: and and to just be honest instead of just kind
Speaker 1: of ghosting and like not inviting, which is when I
Speaker 1: was not getting back. Yeah, yeah, interesting, And you know what,
Speaker 1: that actually leaves space for the future of being like, hey,
Speaker 1: this thing that I before is no longer the case,
Speaker 1: like when you get really honest, even though it might
Speaker 1: hurt to hear, like you can't help your feelings. She
Speaker 1: can't help that. She is just I can't help that.
Speaker 1: I did not want to be friends after I found
Speaker 1: out one of my friends voted for Trump in the
Speaker 1: two thousand and sixteen election. I was so hurt by it,
Speaker 1: and she had claimed that she she voted for him
Speaker 1: because really long time friend that I had, you know,
Speaker 1: wasn't close with anymore but a high school friend. I
Speaker 1: was so deeply disturbed that my friend, who I like,
Speaker 1: who's a woman who has daughters, voted for Trump. I
Speaker 1: just couldn't. I couldn't do it, and I said I can't,
Speaker 1: I cannot be friends with you, and all of my
Speaker 1: other friends were like, really, you're pulling out of this
Speaker 1: front like our group chat because of this, and I'm like,
Speaker 1: I'm too angry about it. It honestly has nothing to
Speaker 1: do with her. It has to do with me and
Speaker 1: figuring out why I can't get over how someone has
Speaker 1: a different opinion about something to me. But to me,
Speaker 1: that was like being friends with my ex husband and
Speaker 1: picking this side that I think is nothing but pure
Speaker 1: evil based on how emotionally invested I am in this
Speaker 1: thing going on. If you choose his side, I can't.
Speaker 1: And I am just now reconnecting. I mean, we always
Speaker 1: stayed friends. I would always write on her birthday. We'd
Speaker 1: write each other like little inside jokes. But the day
Speaker 1: to day stuff that we used to be doing it
Speaker 1: it disappeared, and I there's a I was like, I
Speaker 1: was just in a bad place, and there's in some
Speaker 1: ways I stand by it. Some ways, I'm still sucking
Speaker 1: angry about it because I just don't understand how her
Speaker 1: logic would be. Every man in my life voted for Trump.
Speaker 1: How am I not going to do that? To me,
Speaker 1: that was like, um, because you have a brain of
Speaker 1: your own, and when you get in the voting booth,
Speaker 1: your husband's not monitoring. You just tell them you voted
Speaker 1: for Trump and then don't do It's like, do what's
Speaker 1: right for your daughter inside the booth, bitch. But maybe
Speaker 1: what's right for her daughter is having lower taxes or
Speaker 1: whatever her husband had convinced her was better than you know,
Speaker 1: protecting your right to an abortion, a safe abortion, whatever
Speaker 1: in you know, for me, were the issues in two
Speaker 1: thousand sixteen that were on the line and voting for him.
Speaker 1: And I don't know the whole story and I don't
Speaker 1: know her experience. But we've just started talking again and
Speaker 1: I don't talk about politics obviously, that's just we don't
Speaker 1: talk about Bruno. And it's still hard for me though.
Speaker 1: It's still there's a part of me that really is
Speaker 1: like so angry and feels betrayed, and um, yeah, it's
Speaker 1: like but you know, I've had friends take breaks from
Speaker 1: me too for whatever reason, and I feel like so
Speaker 1: angry because I'm like, she doesn't understand, like I wasn't
Speaker 1: doing that because just like my friend was like, I
Speaker 1: didn't do it because I don't care about abortion rights.
Speaker 1: That did because I just want to get along with
Speaker 1: the men and my family, which I don't understand. I
Speaker 1: don't my my the men and my family. My their
Speaker 1: love isn't contingent on me voting the way they vote.
Speaker 1: But what I don't know what it's like to be
Speaker 1: in a family like that. So it was a struggle.
Speaker 1: But I like people asking for advice. I hope that
Speaker 1: it helped her and that I don't know, I hope
Speaker 1: that people get stuff out of it, you know, like
Speaker 1: it would be funny if she was just like five
Speaker 1: years later, they're like, no, I'm still going through it.
Speaker 1: I'm still best friends with this girl who hasn't asked
Speaker 1: me one question. I gotta say, Michelle, every fucking person
Speaker 1: I know has one person like for one or two
Speaker 1: people like this in their life that they are just
Speaker 1: friends with out of just being nice and going with
Speaker 1: what they did before following doing what your family does. Oh,
Speaker 1: they're friends with my family. Oh there, my, they are
Speaker 1: my family. I gotta just put up with it, like
Speaker 1: you don't. And people only get better if you set
Speaker 1: boundaries for yourself. They learn how to have boundaries for themselves,
Speaker 1: and they learn they learned that their actions have consequences
Speaker 1: as opposed to like, you're not doing anyone any favors
Speaker 1: by faking like putting up with them unless they're your boss,
Speaker 1: and like, you know, you're just trying to get a
Speaker 1: page jug right, Andrew better agree with me? All right, Okay,
Speaker 1: here we go. Oh yeah, rap. You know, sometimes I
Speaker 1: feel like a hedgehog. I'm running through to smug. All
Speaker 1: I want to do is jump like a frog, but
Speaker 1: I get held down by this fucking girl ohover here,
Speaker 1: which ships like a log. But dude, I'm just working around.
Speaker 1: It's just a song. Uh. And sometimes I feel like
Speaker 1: a llama, you know. I get mad at your mama.
Speaker 1: And sometimes I want to vote for Obama, but he's
Speaker 1: not on the tickets, so you gotta just hit it.
Speaker 1: And then a friend votes for Trump and you might
Speaker 1: have to quit it. But the point of this all
Speaker 1: is that Quidditch is a game that was in Harry
Speaker 1: Potter her and I know that sounds lame, but I
Speaker 1: gotta go because I gotta get on a call. I'm
Speaker 1: talking about a dance that I don't want to do
Speaker 1: it all am. I gonna bomb it, probably, but let's
Speaker 1: just see on NBC two thousand three. Al Right, guys,
Speaker 1: don't we have a great weekend. We'll see you on
Speaker 1: the Pod on Monday and Joke Jackie the Joke Man,
Speaker 1: marlen Stern, Baba Booie hit U with behind by Guys
Speaker 1: Beetle Juice