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Speaker 1: The Nicky Glazer Poda. Here's Nikki. Hello here, I am

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Speaker 1: welcome to the show. It's Nicki Glazer Podcast. I'm Nikki Glazer.

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Speaker 1: It is Thursday. I am in St. Louis with Andrew

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Speaker 1: and I have both dogs on my lap. Andrew has

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Speaker 1: both our little stuffed animals on his lap so that

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Speaker 1: he doesn't feel alone. And it's funny that they, the

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Speaker 1: hedgehog and the llama are Luigian Marian. Okay, well, Marian

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Speaker 1: is going over underneath the table now. Isn't that what

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Speaker 1: animals do to go die? Why are you underneath the table?

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Speaker 1: She's getting shade in our room. She's so hot. I

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Speaker 1: just took her for um walk and she just lays

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Speaker 1: like we went in the Starbucks. She just lays flat

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Speaker 1: on the ground to get that cool ground. She's so

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Speaker 1: she's so overheated. It's so goddamn hot outside. Think about

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Speaker 1: how many times she has to step to just to

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Speaker 1: get there. I know she has so many more steps. Yeah,

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Speaker 1: you're right, you're those Santa Pete, aren't you? And I

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Speaker 1: pick her up because she gets so lazy on walk.

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Speaker 1: She's so fat right now? What's she doing? Look at

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Speaker 1: She's going even deeper underneath the table camera. I don't

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Speaker 1: know that. There's something about what dogs want to die.

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Speaker 1: They go away and they go, oh hurt taylors Wagon,

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Speaker 1: she's not dying. No, no no, no, she doesn't jump up,

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Speaker 1: she hasn't. Don't don't you always gotta pick her up? Sorry?

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Speaker 1: I saw I saw some video of like this dog

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Speaker 1: I was gonna was too old to die. That sounds

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Speaker 1: like a James Bond Yeah, that actually is pretty cool line.

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Speaker 1: H James want Sean Connery dead? Yes, yeah, welcome to

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Speaker 1: the row. I think he is. I think he died

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Speaker 1: of I'm gonna say four years ago. Five years ago

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Speaker 1: I found out Don McLean was still alive today. Really,

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Speaker 1: oh yeah, he sent Taylor Oh no, no, no, I'm sorry.

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Speaker 1: He died at age ninety October twentieth foss alarm October

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Speaker 1: four years ago. In what it's felt like, dog just

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Speaker 1: walked off into the woods and goes, I'm too old.

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Speaker 1: I'm gonna die. I know I'm gonna die. That's crazy.

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Speaker 1: Luigi thought Luigi was really really sick when I first

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Speaker 1: got him once and he just disappeared. They don't want

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Speaker 1: to burden you, and they want to be alone. And

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Speaker 1: that's when your animals go off and do something weird

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Speaker 1: and they're like hiding under tables. Something they're hiding so

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Speaker 1: that I don't know, there's probably like they don't want

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Speaker 1: to be bothered when they die. They want their like

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Speaker 1: I don't know what it is. But he went out.

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Speaker 1: He would not come out from under the stairs because

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Speaker 1: he's just going down there to die. And it was

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Speaker 1: so sad when we looked up, like what's going on

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Speaker 1: with that, and they're like, no, that's what they do

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Speaker 1: before they die. And I was like, oh, Luigi was dying.

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Speaker 1: Oh my god, Yeah, you were a baby boy. He

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Speaker 1: was so sick. It's he was so cute when he

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Speaker 1: was sick. I wanted to make him sick. I'm a

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Speaker 1: little embarrassed that I'm dying. Kidding. Yeah, they're like ashamed.

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Speaker 1: I always that way about a subway. If I die

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Speaker 1: on the subway, I would feel terrible say that to

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Speaker 1: just I don't know. I think my last like would

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Speaker 1: be embarrassing. We're talking about like getting creamate and stuff,

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Speaker 1: and it's like I would literally donated my body to

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Speaker 1: necro Felix because I don't care or or lay it

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Speaker 1: out in the like, I'm sure you have some listeners

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Speaker 1: right now they're like, please die tomorrow. They I mean

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Speaker 1: that those people just want me dad. They don't want

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Speaker 1: to suck my buddy. I mean that's just YouTube commenters.

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Speaker 1: UM what I wanted to say, though, I read on

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Speaker 1: read on Reddit that um, a lot of people this

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Speaker 1: woman goes it was the saddest story gear up trigger

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Speaker 1: warning for sad dog thing. She was like, my dog

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Speaker 1: recently died and uh, you know not not like they

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Speaker 1: weren't even that old or anything, but they were just

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Speaker 1: having issues where they were like peeing in the house,

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Speaker 1: shipping in the house, and like she was like, I

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Speaker 1: didn't know that that was a sign of like like

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Speaker 1: severe illness that my dog was like shutting body, shut,

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Speaker 1: shutting down. I just thought the dog was being bad,

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Speaker 1: and so like, I feel so bad reflecting on how

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Speaker 1: I was like yelling at my dog the weeks leading

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Speaker 1: up to it's like diagnosis because I just thought he

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Speaker 1: was being like a bad dog and I was like

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Speaker 1: yelling at him because he but he couldn't control it.

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Speaker 1: And it's like, so if your pet is doing things

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Speaker 1: that it's like abnormal, don't yell at them. Last night

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Speaker 1: I got up to go the bathroom, I walked. I

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Speaker 1: always walked marrying the Luigi right before I go to bed,

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Speaker 1: so like sometimes eleven thirty at night, just for their

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Speaker 1: last p because the idea of them holding in Pete

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Speaker 1: throughout the night like makes me so sad. So they

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Speaker 1: both went. And then in the middle of this morning,

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Speaker 1: at five am, I went to the to my bathroom

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Speaker 1: and I'm like, God, Chris's shower last night is still

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Speaker 1: you got water everywhere? Maryan b everywhere a lot too,

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Speaker 1: And I was like, did that's that's what I do

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Speaker 1: when she pas? Even though little dog? God, well, they

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Speaker 1: were playing so art last night that they were drinking

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Speaker 1: a lot. They were playing so it was so freaking cute.

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Speaker 1: They were lying they sit, yeah they do. You know

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Speaker 1: what lists their spirits is? I don't know what this is,

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Speaker 1: if there's any vets listening. Why is Luigi such a

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Speaker 1: bummer when I'm home alone with him, Like, he's always

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Speaker 1: looks sad. He always is looking at me disappointed. He's

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Speaker 1: never wanting to play with me. He gets excited when

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Speaker 1: I first come home after a while, but then it's

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Speaker 1: just like as soon as that is over, he just

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Speaker 1: goes to the couch and he looks at me like

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Speaker 1: like he's almost like ashamed or sad, and like I go,

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Speaker 1: what's going on? And he and he gets he leans

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Speaker 1: away from me because he's just so sad. And the

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Speaker 1: second Chris or you or any friend comes over that

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Speaker 1: he knows he starts playing again, like not with us,

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Speaker 1: but just like he gets active and starts like going

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Speaker 1: to chew on a bone in the corner like acts, no,

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Speaker 1: there's no attention, Like there's no, he's not getting attention

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Speaker 1: when a friend comes over, it's like it's it's it's

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Speaker 1: it's not because he's getting attention from both of us,

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Speaker 1: Like I will just have a friend. No, mom be

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Speaker 1: sitting on the couch talking and Luigi suddenly will be

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Speaker 1: happy across the room chewing on a bone like la

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Speaker 1: la la, Like why why can't he be like that?

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Speaker 1: Think about yourself. When you're with your mom, you're not like, yeah, wow,

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Speaker 1: just alone with her. You just sit in silence and

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Speaker 1: then cool uncle shows up, You're gonna get more excited.

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Speaker 1: That's the same kind of concept. I don't get what

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Speaker 1: you're saying. I I would have just been happy, like

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Speaker 1: hanging with my mom. I didn't like when uncle showed up.

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Speaker 1: I don't want my mom's friend to show up. I

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Speaker 1: want more attention because now my mom is giving attention

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Speaker 1: to this person. So it doesn't make sense to me.

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Speaker 1: He just likes to having all the people he loves

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Speaker 1: together in one place. It's almost like when Chris isn't

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Speaker 1: here or you're not here, he's worrying about you. But

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Speaker 1: then when he's got you both here to people who

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Speaker 1: he knows he loves, he's just happy to have you.

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Speaker 1: And so every time Chris is over, he's like, they

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Speaker 1: are so cute, and I'm like, they are never like

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Speaker 1: this when I'm alone. Luigi is a different animal when

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Speaker 1: I'm with him, and then when someone else is around,

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Speaker 1: he is just so um. He's just happy. He's chewing

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Speaker 1: on bones. He won't touch a goddamn toy to save

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Speaker 1: his life. When I'm alone with him, he has bones everywhere,

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Speaker 1: fresh treating. I will give him treats. I'll give him

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Speaker 1: pieces of like a fucking pigeon I just killed. No,

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Speaker 1: But the second someone comes over and I'm like hey

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Speaker 1: and we're just talking tos, not even paying attention to him,

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Speaker 1: he goes and he picks up that bone, and then

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Speaker 1: he's like, I'm not and he just choosing the corner

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Speaker 1: by himself. It's so weird. Here, here's my theory. My

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Speaker 1: theory is when you're home alone with him, he feels like, Okay,

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Speaker 1: I just have my mom here, I'm doing my job

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Speaker 1: to hold my post. And then when someone else comes,

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Speaker 1: he feels free, especially if it's someone that he trusts. Okay, well,

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Speaker 1: this person is taking care of my mom. I'm gonna

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Speaker 1: go do my little thing in the corner. I like that.

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Speaker 1: The only thing that because I do think that in

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Speaker 1: some ways that's true. He is so not aware of

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Speaker 1: me when I'm home. It's not it's not like he's

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Speaker 1: like worried about me. He's he's mad. It looks like

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Speaker 1: he's mad at me. Constantly. I'll look at him, then

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Speaker 1: I look over at him and he'll just look back

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Speaker 1: away and I'll go get when some kisses and hugs

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Speaker 1: and he'll he'll move away from me, like get away.

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Speaker 1: He hates it when we do the podcast. He fucking

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Speaker 1: loves it. He loves this is his comfort zone. As

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Speaker 1: two people he knows talking to another person on zoom,

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Speaker 1: two people he knows, having fun, Like he just feels

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Speaker 1: secure when when there's family together. I think I relate

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Speaker 1: to that of like when everyone's taking care of your

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Speaker 1: maybe your right, no, like I know that these people

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Speaker 1: are taking care of so I don't have to try anymore. Well,

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Speaker 1: I mean when he gets to your parents house, he

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Speaker 1: perks up like a motherfucker, gets real excited. It's that's

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Speaker 1: that I'm not confused about, because that I haven't seen

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Speaker 1: a while. The initial like Chris comes over, He's like,

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Speaker 1: all over Chris. I get all that. It's after Chris

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Speaker 1: and I are just established. Hours later, he's chewing on bones.

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Speaker 1: He's so happy and has nothing to do with us.

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Speaker 1: It's it's not like he's playing with us. Does something

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Speaker 1: similar like we'll hang out in the house, you know,

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Speaker 1: and then when Brennan comes, it's like a different cat.

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Speaker 1: It's like, who then is this guy? This guy is

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Speaker 1: a good time. Have you been, Um, how's how's it

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Speaker 1: been being home from the road? We have the weekend off,

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Speaker 1: You're going to a wedding coming up? Um? Yeah, what's

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Speaker 1: been the scoop this week? We don't talk outside of

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Speaker 1: the podcast how's life been? We save it all for

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Speaker 1: the pods. Listen if you're If that makes anyone sad

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Speaker 1: out there, how often do you talk to your best friend?

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Speaker 1: We talked to each other for an hour a day.

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Speaker 1: We're together all weekend, like we talked plenty. We we

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Speaker 1: we've probably talked more than any two people on earth almost,

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Speaker 1: you know. So anyhow, Um, it's good. Like things are good.

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Speaker 1: Like I don't know. I mean, I'm I'm happy, freaking

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Speaker 1: I I like being home. I like having a schedule.

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Speaker 1: Now for some reason, I'm getting older. I like I

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Speaker 1: see myself as a morning person. This morning, I worked

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Speaker 1: out at seven seven am. I went to a class

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Speaker 1: seven am, and I loved it. Then I had all morning.

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Speaker 1: I was just doing like little things that I necessarily

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Speaker 1: want to do. They don't I don't overthink it. I

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Speaker 1: just get it done. I love when I wake up

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Speaker 1: early in the morning and you get something done and

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Speaker 1: then you have you've accomplished so much by eleven, like

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Speaker 1: you're just like I'm my day is done and now

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Speaker 1: there's no burden of like I gotta get that thing done.

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Speaker 1: It takes me a while, though, to get back into that.

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Speaker 1: Like I'm supposed to be writing my book proposal, and

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Speaker 1: I'm like I can't. I did a show on Sunday night. Monday,

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Speaker 1: I have to do a podcast and I I didn't

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Speaker 1: have a day off. I know I don't have days off,

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Speaker 1: and so I said it last week, but I mean,

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Speaker 1: I I can't get I was supposed to start my

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Speaker 1: book proposal this week again and start working on I

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Speaker 1: cannot do it. I've been sleeping. I've been pushing the

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Speaker 1: podcast till eleven thirty because I'm like, I need to

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Speaker 1: stay in bed, like I just can't get up, and

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Speaker 1: it's um. But when I'm when I am home long

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Speaker 1: enough where I can get in that routine, god, it

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Speaker 1: feels good. It takes me like three or four days

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Speaker 1: to get back in that kind of routine. I've been

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Speaker 1: running again and it's awesome. I really feel like if

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Speaker 1: you ever to we didn't go on the road, I

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Speaker 1: would be I'd be like a six am person. For me,

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Speaker 1: it's not the road on the weekend, it's the um.

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Speaker 1: It's the week days being filled with bullshit, like the

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Speaker 1: press stuff has been killing me. Like I feel like

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Speaker 1: Monday to Thursday, Friday, Sunday to Thursday, or Monday to Friday,

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Speaker 1: that's a good enough chunk where I'm like, Okay, I

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Speaker 1: can always count on that to do the same thing.

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Speaker 1: Like weekends, I can be traveling and it's like a weekend,

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Speaker 1: you know, if I have Monday to Friday where I'm

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Speaker 1: just doing a one podcasterday and maybe one other or

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Speaker 1: working on my book book proposal, that leaves me enough

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Speaker 1: space to create to do stuff. It's just like I

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Speaker 1: just can't get a break. It's just constant. I had

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Speaker 1: to have a phone call with a woman after this

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Speaker 1: about I signed up to do this thing that I

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Speaker 1: thought would be really fun because I thought I would

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Speaker 1: have time to do it, and it's like I don't

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Speaker 1: have any time. I had to learn a TikTok dance

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Speaker 1: this NBC show that I have to film myself doing.

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Speaker 1: I thought I could film myself on the phone. They

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Speaker 1: just sent an entire camera case that I have to

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Speaker 1: set up and learned this TikTok dance. I haven't learned

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Speaker 1: the dance yet. I invited my sister over because I

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Speaker 1: was like, it would be fun for us. Both were

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Speaker 1: both bad at dancing, but we like to learn dances

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Speaker 1: to learn it and I love I don't care about

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Speaker 1: being a bad dancer on TV anymore. So I gladly

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Speaker 1: was like, I'll do this. They're not paying me that much,

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Speaker 1: but I'm like, I got Now I gotta learn this dance.

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Speaker 1: I thought it was going to be like three weeks

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Speaker 1: from down. They're like, no, we needed by Friday eight am.

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Speaker 1: So it's Wednesday right now. By the way we're filming this,

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Speaker 1: I have to learn a dance in two days. That

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Speaker 1: is not that easy. And to set up a camera. Yeah,

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Speaker 1: I love that they're making you the director. They're like,

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Speaker 1: hold the boom? Can you hold the boom? And can

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Speaker 1: you get yourself flying to l A As soon as

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Speaker 1: they go you can do this remotely. I was like,

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Speaker 1: and they said shoot it in high death and I'm like, oh,

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Speaker 1: that means on your phone. I think they changed their

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Speaker 1: mind after the initial pitch, and now they're like, but

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Speaker 1: I did get I'm not giving back the suitcase they

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Speaker 1: just sent me. And they sent me a suitcase and

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Speaker 1: it's a gorgeous suitcase. So I'm like, I'm keeping that.

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Speaker 1: It's probably like a Target one, but still put nice

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Speaker 1: three months. You're gonna be like, yeah, we're gonna need

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Speaker 1: that bad man. But I've loved getting back in a routine. Yeah,

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Speaker 1: I've been running again, and you know what, Yeah, I

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Speaker 1: just do the same route every day. I probably gotta

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Speaker 1: switch it up and I'm gonna get murdered. But um,

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Speaker 1: I've been bringing my Tiger Lady with me when it

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Speaker 1: has it's my self defense tool. So come at me.

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Speaker 1: You're gonna get scratched pretty hard. It's gonna be pretty annoying.

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Speaker 1: You can still write me, but you're gonna your your

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Speaker 1: back's gonna get You're gonna look like you were first. Yeah,

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Speaker 1: they're gonna look like I liked it at first. Um,

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Speaker 1: I uh yeah. But it's been fucking hot here. I

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Speaker 1: mean we we left on Friday. Last Friday, it was

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Speaker 1: forty degrees. We came back on Sunday, um forecast for

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Speaker 1: Monday four degrees. So I've been running and I love

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Speaker 1: running in extreme heat. I love it. There's something about

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Speaker 1: it's like because I don't run for like burning calories anymore.

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Speaker 1: I run for like the cleanse of it, like my

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Speaker 1: soul and like just sweating a lot and like feeling like, oh,

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Speaker 1: like I love the feeling that I get on a run.

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Speaker 1: Four miles is perfect for me because the first smile,

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Speaker 1: I'm like Okay, this is easy one mile, and then

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Speaker 1: the second mile, I'm like, oh it's a little bit harder.

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Speaker 1: Third mile. I want to fucking die and I want

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Speaker 1: to give up, but I keep going because I like

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Speaker 1: the feeling of Louis k used to say he'd run

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Speaker 1: five miles a day because there's always a partner in

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Speaker 1: five miles where he wanted to give up, and you

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Speaker 1: have to persevere a pest. Everything in your body is

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Speaker 1: saying please stop. Which there's a point where if you're

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Speaker 1: having an injury, do please stop. Writing a movie, And

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Speaker 1: like those middle pages that are like you just gotta

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Speaker 1: get through them to get to the writing a movie. Yeah,

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Speaker 1: middle pages, if you write a movie, it's like I said,

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Speaker 1: watching a movie, I'm like reading a movie. Subtitles call

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Speaker 1: the pages. Um. Yeah, Like the middle is the hard part.

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Speaker 1: But man, when that voice on my app goes one

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Speaker 1: mile left, like it's perfect. There's something about thinks in

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Speaker 1: quadrants for me. Four pieces first pieces like easy, second piece,

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Speaker 1: a little hard, third piece. I want to die. If

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Speaker 1: there was two more pieces, it was fifth, it would

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Speaker 1: be a little bit more insurmountable. There's something about the

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Speaker 1: last fourth that is so easy because it's almost done,

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Speaker 1: and I just it feels like it's it takes me

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Speaker 1: fifty thirty six to fifty minutes to do this, depending

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Speaker 1: on how fast I'm going. And lately, because I just

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Speaker 1: don't care about the time, I'm not trying to be

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Speaker 1: at the time and I'm just trying to like kind

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Speaker 1: of just listen to a podcast, like go through my thoughts.

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Speaker 1: I've been running like ten fifty miles, Like I mean,

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Speaker 1: I used to be up seven thirty and now I'm like, no,

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Speaker 1: this is just about shuffling along and it's just so

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Speaker 1: it's so nice and you instantly feel better. My mind

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Speaker 1: is so much clearer. I feel healthy, like I don't.

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Speaker 1: There's no part of me anymore that goes, oh no,

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Speaker 1: I can eat a lot tonight, or like, oh good,

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Speaker 1: I'm not gonna be There's no It used to always

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Speaker 1: be mode evated by I don't want to be fat,

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Speaker 1: or like now I can eat, or now I deserve

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Speaker 1: something on the other side of this, And instead now

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Speaker 1: it's just like a treat that I get to go run.

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Speaker 1: I'm like excited. So I feel about that class. You know,

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Speaker 1: it's interesting, like it's it's f forty five it's called

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Speaker 1: and I've talked about how it's like a little CULTI

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Speaker 1: like today was David Beckham day, Like it's his workout.

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Speaker 1: He comes up on the screen, so he's getting paid

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Speaker 1: millions of dollars. Yeah, it's so funny too. He's like

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Speaker 1: stands on his on his good side the whole time.

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Speaker 1: He's stupid. He's like, hey, what's up guy. It's like

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Speaker 1: it's just his left side of It's it's very Mariah Gary.

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Speaker 1: But the f stands are functional. And obviously I joked

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Speaker 1: that I can't get on the floor and stuff like that,

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Speaker 1: and I've on'tly been doing this two weeks. But a

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Speaker 1: lot of its movement that you just don't do when

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Speaker 1: you get older. You just you just work out. You

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Speaker 1: either run or you This is like ship you would

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Speaker 1: do like if you were training for soccer back in

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Speaker 1: I mean hence David By like like today there were

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Speaker 1: like box jumps and this box it was like four ft.

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Speaker 1: I'm like, I'm not getting like, I don't know in

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Speaker 1: my mind as a forty two year old man, I go,

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Speaker 1: if you ask me literally two weeks ago, could you

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Speaker 1: get up on the I go, no, I can't, And

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Speaker 1: literally in two, dysfunctional forty two. Yeah, yeah, diabetes forty two.

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Speaker 1: I'm sucking jumping on this box and ship and I'm like,

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Speaker 1: it's like blowing my mind how quick you can change

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Speaker 1: your brain and your body to fucking to be like

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Speaker 1: no ages, I know it sounds just you can literally

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Speaker 1: still move your body, like really, well, if you could

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Speaker 1: just get over the hump in two weeks up stack

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Speaker 1: of boxes David Becka that are sponsored by David left Side. No,

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Speaker 1: it's that's a good point, and I always referenced this,

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Speaker 1: so I'm sorry I've said a million times on the podcast,

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Speaker 1: but it just boggles my fucking mind. The story that

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Speaker 1: I heard on Radio Lab that podcast about a woman

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Speaker 1: who was an ultramarathon runner that used to run marathons

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Speaker 1: and half marathons and she was always get like, you know,

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Speaker 1: she was just casually a marathon runner, not good at all.

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Speaker 1: Her brain. She had a brain injury where a part

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Speaker 1: of her brain that uh short term memories. She has

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Speaker 1: no short term memory anymore, so her brain is constantly restarting.

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Speaker 1: She can remember things long term, like you know where

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Speaker 1: she went to high school, friends from, but like anything

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Speaker 1: short term, it's not it's constantly restarting, and she could

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Speaker 1: suddenly overnight do these hundred and fifty mile races when

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Speaker 1: she was really just a you know, a five kres

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Speaker 1: it was like a ten k Like she wasn't doing

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Speaker 1: anything like any anywhere close to this. All that changed

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Speaker 1: for her was that she was looking at these races.

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Speaker 1: It was she was constantly starting over on these races.

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Speaker 1: So if you constantly look at your life as instead

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Speaker 1: of going this bike, right, I have to do is

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Speaker 1: twenty miles, if you just take it one mile at

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Speaker 1: a time and start over, you can do more than

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Speaker 1: you've ever thought you could do. And I think that

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Speaker 1: that's something that I you know, even for this book.

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Speaker 1: As soon as my the woman helping me was like,

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Speaker 1: let's not look at this as like a forty page proposal.

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Speaker 1: Let's take it one page at a time, one little thing.

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Speaker 1: There's always tiny steps you can do. And I think

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Speaker 1: that that's that's just it's so mental because the way

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Speaker 1: we look at these things we go I can't, like

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Speaker 1: I was talking about two days ago about the whatever

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Speaker 1: you're dealing with binge, eating, uh, smoking cigarettes, drinking, this

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Speaker 1: idea of like it's hard, this is gonna be This

390
00:19:27,960 --> 00:19:31,280
Speaker 1: recovery is so hard. Quitting drinking so hard. If you

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Speaker 1: keep telling yourself that it's you're not gonna you're you're

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Speaker 1: giving yourself excuses not to to give to give up

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Speaker 1: along the way, if you treat it like, well, actually,

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Speaker 1: I just have to be sober this next minute, then

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Speaker 1: this next minute. Then I always tell people that are like,

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Speaker 1: you know, in my eating to sort of recovery, They're like,

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Speaker 1: I'm never gonna get to binge again. That's the only

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Speaker 1: thing I ever want to do, saying that you just

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Speaker 1: don't binge for the next five minutes, and then start

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Speaker 1: over and say you could you can binge in five minutes.

401
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Speaker 1: How it feels after five minutes not doing it. Let's

402
00:20:02,240 --> 00:20:03,639
Speaker 1: go to break and see if you can make it

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Speaker 1: through this new commercial break without binging. We're back. I

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Speaker 1: know this is turning into like an eating disorder hell podcast,

405
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Speaker 1: but I feel like, as I've been listening to podcasts

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Speaker 1: that have helped me overcome stuff, if I have a

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Speaker 1: message of recovery that can get through with a comedy

408
00:20:25,560 --> 00:20:28,719
Speaker 1: like self Care kind of the conversational podcast we have,

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00:20:29,280 --> 00:20:32,679
Speaker 1: why not put that in there, because you know we

410
00:20:32,720 --> 00:20:34,639
Speaker 1: can have it. You can have it all you I don't.

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Speaker 1: I'm doing this recovery talk tonight, which is last night.

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Speaker 1: It happened on Facebook. It's uh if you want to

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Speaker 1: check it out, It's the Addiction Center. It's American Addiction

414
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Speaker 1: Centers facebook page. I did at Facebook live about my

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Speaker 1: recovery journey in quotations because to me, I just I

416
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Speaker 1: you know, once I got sober from alcohol, I went

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Speaker 1: to pot, and then once the pot was taken away,

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Speaker 1: I went to limia, and then I went from beliemia.

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Speaker 1: I went to been starving myself like I'm always and

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Speaker 1: then once I was starving my couldn't starve myself anymore,

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Speaker 1: I went back to pot, like I'm always replacing it,

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Speaker 1: and even now I'm like micro dosing a little bit,

423
00:21:13,760 --> 00:21:16,879
Speaker 1: and like there's always I'm I'm replacing. So I'm a

424
00:21:16,960 --> 00:21:19,520
Speaker 1: little bit reluctant to be like I'm recovered and I

425
00:21:19,560 --> 00:21:22,800
Speaker 1: can't wait to share my steps with you, But I

426
00:21:23,320 --> 00:21:26,359
Speaker 1: do feel, um, I'm very grateful that I get to

427
00:21:26,400 --> 00:21:27,880
Speaker 1: like talk about it and it I now it does

428
00:21:27,920 --> 00:21:31,720
Speaker 1: help people, because first of all, it's not fucking perfect

429
00:21:31,720 --> 00:21:33,440
Speaker 1: and I and I posted about it in Rachel find

430
00:21:33,440 --> 00:21:34,720
Speaker 1: Stein wrote to me I was like, so good that

431
00:21:34,760 --> 00:21:36,480
Speaker 1: you're doing this, and I'm like, I feel like a

432
00:21:36,520 --> 00:21:39,240
Speaker 1: fraud because I'm like, I just took like a micro

433
00:21:39,359 --> 00:21:44,000
Speaker 1: dose mushrooms, which I don't feel, but I do like it.

434
00:21:44,160 --> 00:21:46,040
Speaker 1: I know it helps me. There's something. It's not like

435
00:21:46,040 --> 00:21:48,840
Speaker 1: I'm like getting fucked up or I'm like, whoa the sun.

436
00:21:48,920 --> 00:21:51,120
Speaker 1: It's like so subtle, I don't feel it, but I'm

437
00:21:51,160 --> 00:21:54,960
Speaker 1: still reaching to something that is not me to like

438
00:21:55,000 --> 00:21:56,880
Speaker 1: help me. And I'm on the antide pressence. Actually I'm

439
00:21:56,880 --> 00:22:00,119
Speaker 1: not anymore, but I'm on like I take things is

440
00:22:00,160 --> 00:22:01,840
Speaker 1: to make me feel better. Sometimes I do a kombucha

441
00:22:01,840 --> 00:22:03,679
Speaker 1: because I'm like, I just want to feel something different.

442
00:22:03,800 --> 00:22:08,960
Speaker 1: Caffeine I'm fucking addicted to. But I feel like, as

443
00:22:09,000 --> 00:22:11,560
Speaker 1: I always tell people that are dealing with addiction, stuff

444
00:22:11,640 --> 00:22:15,040
Speaker 1: is like there's always gonna be something you supplement it with,

445
00:22:15,040 --> 00:22:17,479
Speaker 1: whether it's crying, whether it's like feeling your feelings, like

446
00:22:17,560 --> 00:22:20,640
Speaker 1: all these uncomfortable things. But if it's the less of

447
00:22:20,680 --> 00:22:24,800
Speaker 1: the if it's lesser bad to yourself. For me, smoking

448
00:22:24,840 --> 00:22:27,040
Speaker 1: pot is less evil than drinking for me, some people

449
00:22:27,080 --> 00:22:29,520
Speaker 1: might be the other way around. To me, blieve you,

450
00:22:29,600 --> 00:22:32,240
Speaker 1: for a while was less bad than drinking. Then that

451
00:22:32,320 --> 00:22:34,119
Speaker 1: got too bad because I was getting mouth sores and

452
00:22:34,160 --> 00:22:36,600
Speaker 1: like my sore throat was sore, and I was tired

453
00:22:36,600 --> 00:22:38,920
Speaker 1: of cleaning toilets. Okay, So then now I'm going to

454
00:22:38,960 --> 00:22:41,399
Speaker 1: switch to this other thing like I'm always and that's

455
00:22:41,440 --> 00:22:44,600
Speaker 1: that's okay. Well, the addiction is switching, like that's an

456
00:22:44,600 --> 00:22:48,359
Speaker 1: addiction in itself. Of I don't think that that is no,

457
00:22:48,720 --> 00:22:51,720
Speaker 1: I think that well. I I know that I'm dealing

458
00:22:51,720 --> 00:22:54,440
Speaker 1: with feelings of discomfort when I want to reach for

459
00:22:54,480 --> 00:22:56,000
Speaker 1: the food, when I want to reach for the pot,

460
00:22:56,080 --> 00:22:57,879
Speaker 1: I just having an uncomfortable feeling, and I want to

461
00:22:57,880 --> 00:23:00,199
Speaker 1: feel something else, even if I reached from music to

462
00:23:00,240 --> 00:23:02,239
Speaker 1: go like, um, I just don't want to think right now.

463
00:23:02,280 --> 00:23:04,320
Speaker 1: I want to put on music like it's something to

464
00:23:04,440 --> 00:23:07,120
Speaker 1: kill the thoughts that I'm having because I'm uncomfortable with them.

465
00:23:07,240 --> 00:23:12,160
Speaker 1: And that's okay, Like it's okay to have it's okay

466
00:23:12,160 --> 00:23:15,280
Speaker 1: to have addictions. You're not a bad there's nothing wrong

467
00:23:15,320 --> 00:23:18,760
Speaker 1: with you. It's like we're constantly seeking other things to

468
00:23:18,840 --> 00:23:22,480
Speaker 1: distract us. It's you know, I always say, though, if

469
00:23:22,480 --> 00:23:24,399
Speaker 1: you're being like I can't believe a smoke pot. I

470
00:23:24,440 --> 00:23:26,360
Speaker 1: can't believe it drinks so much. I got wasted last night.

471
00:23:26,920 --> 00:23:29,280
Speaker 1: Let's just say, if you didn't get wasted, you might

472
00:23:29,280 --> 00:23:31,240
Speaker 1: have beat your children, you might have kicked your dog,

473
00:23:31,320 --> 00:23:34,480
Speaker 1: you might have cut yourself. These things are might be

474
00:23:34,600 --> 00:23:37,120
Speaker 1: worse than what you did. So maybe you were doing

475
00:23:37,160 --> 00:23:41,600
Speaker 1: the best thing you could do and that's okay. Does

476
00:23:41,600 --> 00:23:43,600
Speaker 1: any of this presentate with you, Yeah, for sure. I

477
00:23:43,640 --> 00:23:46,879
Speaker 1: mean I think the idea of having I guess you

478
00:23:46,920 --> 00:23:51,720
Speaker 1: could call them healthy addictions, although you know, any healthy

479
00:23:51,720 --> 00:23:55,400
Speaker 1: addiction can become unhealthy depending on how when your life

480
00:23:55,400 --> 00:24:03,400
Speaker 1: becomes unmanageable. You know, Um, this class helps me tremendously

481
00:24:03,960 --> 00:24:06,679
Speaker 1: in the sense of it gives me structure which then

482
00:24:06,720 --> 00:24:09,520
Speaker 1: I could apply to my life. And like, I just

483
00:24:09,600 --> 00:24:12,399
Speaker 1: feel like it's the first time I took a workouts

484
00:24:12,480 --> 00:24:16,199
Speaker 1: because I've done CrossFit, I've done like other kind of

485
00:24:16,200 --> 00:24:18,680
Speaker 1: things where it starts out like, oh, I'm into this,

486
00:24:18,760 --> 00:24:20,320
Speaker 1: and then they go you could do a little bit

487
00:24:20,359 --> 00:24:22,960
Speaker 1: more weight than that you could do, and then it

488
00:24:23,040 --> 00:24:25,879
Speaker 1: becomes like man man upping kind of ship again. And

489
00:24:25,920 --> 00:24:32,320
Speaker 1: it's like stats are on the board. Yes, now no

490
00:24:32,480 --> 00:24:34,640
Speaker 1: it doesn't, but they do have stat stuff. But it's

491
00:24:34,640 --> 00:24:37,240
Speaker 1: like for your own heart rate like like what you

492
00:24:37,240 --> 00:24:39,399
Speaker 1: are percentage wise, and there's a little bit of like

493
00:24:39,480 --> 00:24:42,280
Speaker 1: come on, you could do you could do more in regards,

494
00:24:42,400 --> 00:24:45,399
Speaker 1: but it's not like meat headed like I've been around

495
00:24:45,440 --> 00:24:47,960
Speaker 1: like a lot of meat off the treadmill because you're

496
00:24:47,960 --> 00:24:49,639
Speaker 1: trying to run fast in front of Brenna. Does it

497
00:24:49,640 --> 00:24:51,879
Speaker 1: feel like was that feeling that you got before you

498
00:24:51,920 --> 00:24:54,000
Speaker 1: started sprinting that time where you got injured? Do you

499
00:24:54,040 --> 00:24:58,200
Speaker 1: feel that ever? Now? No? I don't. I don't even

500
00:24:58,240 --> 00:25:00,080
Speaker 1: though I did jump as high as I could it,

501
00:25:00,200 --> 00:25:04,199
Speaker 1: but like the idea like, no, it doesn't feel like

502
00:25:04,240 --> 00:25:06,520
Speaker 1: there was whatever that was about getting past the fear

503
00:25:06,560 --> 00:25:08,560
Speaker 1: in that way instead of trying to prove something to

504
00:25:08,600 --> 00:25:11,520
Speaker 1: someone like becoming a fear of like I can't jump

505
00:25:11,560 --> 00:25:13,200
Speaker 1: this as opposed to like if I jump this then

506
00:25:13,240 --> 00:25:16,560
Speaker 1: everyone will like me. Yeah, yeah, it was, honestly it was.

507
00:25:16,760 --> 00:25:20,080
Speaker 1: It's just like a way to like push yourself without

508
00:25:20,720 --> 00:25:23,679
Speaker 1: that like fucking like you could do you could do

509
00:25:23,760 --> 00:25:26,200
Speaker 1: more weight, and then that's how you get hurt. Number one.

510
00:25:26,640 --> 00:25:29,760
Speaker 1: That's how like like the I like you don't do

511
00:25:29,840 --> 00:25:32,760
Speaker 1: good form, then you're not doing it correctly. Like there's

512
00:25:32,760 --> 00:25:35,840
Speaker 1: so many reasons so like this is good because it

513
00:25:35,880 --> 00:25:39,399
Speaker 1: pushes you without that like extra like just there's just

514
00:25:39,480 --> 00:25:43,280
Speaker 1: something about like it sounds like what I'm trying that

515
00:25:43,400 --> 00:25:46,120
Speaker 1: it's it's motivated of like, no, you can do this.

516
00:25:46,119 --> 00:25:48,720
Speaker 1: This isn't about like prove it, you fucking pussy. It's

517
00:25:48,760 --> 00:25:51,760
Speaker 1: like what's stopping you from thinking? That looks like a

518
00:25:51,840 --> 00:25:53,960
Speaker 1: crazy amount, but we know you can do it and

519
00:25:54,000 --> 00:25:57,119
Speaker 1: it's not gonna hurt you, like trust that this is

520
00:25:57,160 --> 00:25:59,920
Speaker 1: okay and that you are capable of this. It's conquering

521
00:26:00,119 --> 00:26:05,080
Speaker 1: fear as opposed to, uh, trying to be better than

522
00:26:05,520 --> 00:26:08,920
Speaker 1: trying to prove yourself. When we conquer fears, I feel

523
00:26:08,960 --> 00:26:10,919
Speaker 1: like even me signing up for this dancing when I

524
00:26:10,960 --> 00:26:13,520
Speaker 1: they asked me to do it, I'm having flashbacks of

525
00:26:13,600 --> 00:26:16,080
Speaker 1: Dancing with the Stars. I'm having flashbacks of getting trashed

526
00:26:16,080 --> 00:26:18,959
Speaker 1: on that fucking podcast about my Bob Saget song. Like

527
00:26:19,000 --> 00:26:20,720
Speaker 1: I'm having all these fears like if people see me

528
00:26:20,760 --> 00:26:22,680
Speaker 1: do this dance, which once I saw the dance, I'm like, well,

529
00:26:22,680 --> 00:26:25,560
Speaker 1: this is not as cool as the Lizzo Like in

530
00:26:25,600 --> 00:26:28,520
Speaker 1: the minute, I'm gonnaita sentiment that that's a really cool

531
00:26:28,600 --> 00:26:31,840
Speaker 1: dance where she's like, no, this one is like I

532
00:26:32,040 --> 00:26:34,760
Speaker 1: feel the earth and the moon and the stars and

533
00:26:34,880 --> 00:26:37,880
Speaker 1: the sky, and I'm doing things like this and it's

534
00:26:38,000 --> 00:26:41,480
Speaker 1: jazzy and I try and it's like a little bit embarrassing.

535
00:26:41,840 --> 00:26:45,080
Speaker 1: But I was like, honestly, if I learned this dance,

536
00:26:45,119 --> 00:26:47,680
Speaker 1: I will feel so good about myself. And I am

537
00:26:47,760 --> 00:26:49,879
Speaker 1: scared of this, so I'm saying yes to it because

538
00:26:49,960 --> 00:26:52,879
Speaker 1: everything in me is going, don't do this. But I

539
00:26:52,960 --> 00:26:54,720
Speaker 1: learned the hard way when I did the first pitch

540
00:26:55,359 --> 00:26:59,639
Speaker 1: that also scared me. And again, like Dancing with the Stars,

541
00:27:00,000 --> 00:27:01,280
Speaker 1: I did it. It did not go the way I

542
00:27:01,280 --> 00:27:03,840
Speaker 1: wanted to. I was humiliated. No matter how much people

543
00:27:03,840 --> 00:27:07,320
Speaker 1: say it wasn't that bad, I personally was deeply humiliated

544
00:27:07,320 --> 00:27:09,800
Speaker 1: by it. And I was talking about it in therapy

545
00:27:09,880 --> 00:27:13,480
Speaker 1: with Chris yesterday because that was a day that oh

546
00:27:13,520 --> 00:27:15,680
Speaker 1: my god, I was so fucked up that day. So

547
00:27:16,840 --> 00:27:18,920
Speaker 1: that day I was you know, I did two days

548
00:27:18,920 --> 00:27:21,240
Speaker 1: of press in New York for three days in a row.

549
00:27:21,359 --> 00:27:23,760
Speaker 1: That just broke me. I mean, I told you guys

550
00:27:23,800 --> 00:27:25,520
Speaker 1: both like I, if I did the podcast, I'll start

551
00:27:25,520 --> 00:27:27,720
Speaker 1: crying because I'm just so tired. I can't even I

552
00:27:27,760 --> 00:27:31,119
Speaker 1: can't do it. And um, and I've only been that

553
00:27:31,480 --> 00:27:34,320
Speaker 1: much exhausted from work in the past. One time when

554
00:27:34,320 --> 00:27:36,920
Speaker 1: I went to the Comedy Seller in two thousand, like thirteen,

555
00:27:37,160 --> 00:27:39,200
Speaker 1: and I was trying to do stand up and Nicki

556
00:27:39,200 --> 00:27:42,119
Speaker 1: and Sarah alive and right all day, And one day

557
00:27:42,119 --> 00:27:43,320
Speaker 1: I started up the Seller to do a set, and

558
00:27:43,320 --> 00:27:46,800
Speaker 1: I was just like, I can't, Like I didn't even

559
00:27:46,800 --> 00:27:48,639
Speaker 1: know what was happening to me. It was truly like

560
00:27:48,720 --> 00:27:52,679
Speaker 1: Lindsay Lohan hospitalized for exhaustion. So on the heels of

561
00:27:52,680 --> 00:27:55,480
Speaker 1: that New York trip, I fly right home on Friday

562
00:27:55,520 --> 00:27:57,800
Speaker 1: after Thursday night, I'm on Watch What Happens Live. I

563
00:27:57,840 --> 00:27:59,840
Speaker 1: go out with Cured and Shipgun and those friends. I

564
00:28:00,080 --> 00:28:02,080
Speaker 1: like a good night, but it's still like a late night.

565
00:28:02,119 --> 00:28:04,240
Speaker 1: I packed. My flight is at fucking five in the

566
00:28:04,440 --> 00:28:06,000
Speaker 1: I get up picked up at five in the morning

567
00:28:06,000 --> 00:28:09,119
Speaker 1: from the hotel I land. I haven't you know, I

568
00:28:09,160 --> 00:28:11,239
Speaker 1: have to do the podcast, have an hour sleep, and

569
00:28:11,280 --> 00:28:14,919
Speaker 1: then go to this Cardinals day game, which I'm embarrassed by.

570
00:28:15,359 --> 00:28:17,119
Speaker 1: Ak a like the way Noah is when she has

571
00:28:17,160 --> 00:28:19,520
Speaker 1: a party thrown for any kind of attention that she

572
00:28:19,560 --> 00:28:22,920
Speaker 1: didn't feel like she earned, Like is that right, Noah?

573
00:28:23,040 --> 00:28:25,840
Speaker 1: Like having your birthday party bar Mitzka, that kind of thing,

574
00:28:25,880 --> 00:28:28,280
Speaker 1: like at a wedding. You're just like, what I didn't

575
00:28:28,440 --> 00:28:31,240
Speaker 1: like get a degree. I just got someone to love me, Like,

576
00:28:31,280 --> 00:28:34,399
Speaker 1: I don't need all the attention. Yeah, I just don't

577
00:28:34,440 --> 00:28:37,960
Speaker 1: like the spotlight. Yeah. I related to you on on

578
00:28:37,960 --> 00:28:40,760
Speaker 1: that Nikki Glazer day. But I couldn't say that because

579
00:28:40,760 --> 00:28:42,560
Speaker 1: it was such a gift that was being given to

580
00:28:42,600 --> 00:28:44,480
Speaker 1: me and people are worked so hard, and it was

581
00:28:44,800 --> 00:28:46,480
Speaker 1: for me to be anything like I don't want to

582
00:28:46,520 --> 00:28:50,080
Speaker 1: do this, like this is embarrassing, would be really hurtful

583
00:28:50,120 --> 00:28:51,960
Speaker 1: to the people that put so much effort into this.

584
00:28:52,720 --> 00:28:55,000
Speaker 1: And prior to I'm trying to make this quick, prior

585
00:28:55,040 --> 00:28:58,200
Speaker 1: to me doing the Cardinals game, and this whole Nicky

586
00:28:58,200 --> 00:29:01,400
Speaker 1: Glazer Day came to be. I sent the email to Chris,

587
00:29:01,440 --> 00:29:05,320
Speaker 1: my boyfriend because he loves the Cardinals, and was like, hey, um,

588
00:29:05,400 --> 00:29:07,320
Speaker 1: what do you think of the schedule, all the press interviews,

589
00:29:07,360 --> 00:29:08,640
Speaker 1: all the things of doing at the Cardinals game? And

590
00:29:08,640 --> 00:29:10,360
Speaker 1: he was like, you would be cool maybe to throw

591
00:29:10,360 --> 00:29:11,920
Speaker 1: out T shirts with Fred Bird or whatever. And I

592
00:29:11,920 --> 00:29:14,200
Speaker 1: think I've talked about this before, but I really examined

593
00:29:14,200 --> 00:29:17,000
Speaker 1: what happened that day, and I was like, oh, my god.

594
00:29:17,000 --> 00:29:18,560
Speaker 1: I would love that the girls are hot. You get

595
00:29:18,560 --> 00:29:20,000
Speaker 1: to wear short little shorts, you get to like be

596
00:29:20,080 --> 00:29:22,080
Speaker 1: on the dugout and like throw T shirts and be

597
00:29:22,160 --> 00:29:23,760
Speaker 1: like wow, and like it's kind of like being a

598
00:29:23,760 --> 00:29:25,960
Speaker 1: Hooters girl, but like in a tasteful way. With fred Bird.

599
00:29:25,960 --> 00:29:27,720
Speaker 1: I was like, oh my god, that would be so

600
00:29:27,800 --> 00:29:30,880
Speaker 1: fun when I and I really was going home about it,

601
00:29:30,960 --> 00:29:33,880
Speaker 1: and then Chris was like, okay, and that was his suggestion,

602
00:29:33,920 --> 00:29:35,920
Speaker 1: and I said yes to it, and I was meaningful

603
00:29:35,920 --> 00:29:38,480
Speaker 1: of it. I followed up with him being like, oh, yeah,

604
00:29:38,680 --> 00:29:40,680
Speaker 1: to make sure that because he's talking to people, he's like,

605
00:29:40,680 --> 00:29:42,160
Speaker 1: I'm getting involved. I was like, make sure you do

606
00:29:42,240 --> 00:29:44,320
Speaker 1: the T shirt thing. So again, I'm like, do the

607
00:29:44,360 --> 00:29:46,600
Speaker 1: T shirt thing again. I'm thinking in my head that

608
00:29:46,680 --> 00:29:49,120
Speaker 1: was his idea, but I'm into it. And then the

609
00:29:49,200 --> 00:29:51,800
Speaker 1: day I throw the pitch, it doesn't go well. I

610
00:29:51,840 --> 00:29:54,000
Speaker 1: can't I can't cry about it because I then I say,

611
00:29:54,040 --> 00:29:55,440
Speaker 1: it seemed like an ingrade. I don't want to be.

612
00:29:55,440 --> 00:29:57,080
Speaker 1: I don't want people to feel sorry for me. I

613
00:29:57,120 --> 00:30:00,120
Speaker 1: just want to like get through it. And then I

614
00:30:00,160 --> 00:30:02,840
Speaker 1: have to go do this, you know, slingshot, these T

615
00:30:02,920 --> 00:30:06,560
Speaker 1: shirts with these hot girls. I'm feeling fucking big, and

616
00:30:06,640 --> 00:30:08,880
Speaker 1: I saw like myself in my outfit, I did not

617
00:30:09,000 --> 00:30:11,440
Speaker 1: look small. I looked old compared to these girls Like

618
00:30:11,480 --> 00:30:13,960
Speaker 1: I just all the shame of that pitch started going

619
00:30:14,000 --> 00:30:17,480
Speaker 1: to my looks and my athletics proudness, and like, who

620
00:30:17,520 --> 00:30:19,040
Speaker 1: do you think you are? People this game think you're

621
00:30:19,040 --> 00:30:21,480
Speaker 1: a joke. No one cares about Nikki Glazer. Everyone's like

622
00:30:21,520 --> 00:30:23,760
Speaker 1: embarrassed that you're even doing this. They're probably like, what

623
00:30:23,760 --> 00:30:27,080
Speaker 1: does Nicki Glazer day? Like? Stop? And so I'm waiting

624
00:30:27,080 --> 00:30:28,520
Speaker 1: in the wings before going out to do the T

625
00:30:28,600 --> 00:30:31,080
Speaker 1: shirt and I am in no mood to do this,

626
00:30:31,160 --> 00:30:34,080
Speaker 1: and I'm trying to keep it together, but I'm kind

627
00:30:34,120 --> 00:30:37,000
Speaker 1: of projected. I'm so mad that I can't accept that

628
00:30:37,120 --> 00:30:39,200
Speaker 1: I have done this to myself. I agreed to this.

629
00:30:39,280 --> 00:30:40,680
Speaker 1: I was the one that was like, yes, Chris, I

630
00:30:40,680 --> 00:30:43,400
Speaker 1: want to do that idea you had. I can't accept

631
00:30:43,440 --> 00:30:45,360
Speaker 1: that because if I do, then I start going like

632
00:30:46,040 --> 00:30:47,920
Speaker 1: I have to. I'm so embarrassed about the pitch. I

633
00:30:47,960 --> 00:30:50,160
Speaker 1: have to blame someone for it. It cannot be my fault.

634
00:30:50,400 --> 00:30:52,440
Speaker 1: It has to be they didn't let me practice. They

635
00:30:52,480 --> 00:30:54,680
Speaker 1: wanted me to do this, and I was coursed into it.

636
00:30:54,920 --> 00:30:56,960
Speaker 1: I don't even want to do this this fucking like

637
00:30:57,120 --> 00:30:59,040
Speaker 1: because then they're going the slingshot thing is a lot

638
00:30:59,040 --> 00:31:01,120
Speaker 1: harder than it looks, and I'm like, oh, great, a

639
00:31:01,200 --> 00:31:03,480
Speaker 1: fucking another thing that I'm I'm like, I don't even

640
00:31:03,480 --> 00:31:04,520
Speaker 1: want you to tell me how to do it, so

641
00:31:04,560 --> 00:31:06,120
Speaker 1: I have an excuse for when I do it poorly,

642
00:31:06,240 --> 00:31:08,040
Speaker 1: I can blame you for not telling it to me.

643
00:31:08,640 --> 00:31:12,360
Speaker 1: And so I start kind of getting an attitude towards Chris,

644
00:31:12,360 --> 00:31:15,440
Speaker 1: who's with me, because he's you know, you tru the

645
00:31:15,480 --> 00:31:17,400
Speaker 1: people you love the most, you like take it out

646
00:31:17,440 --> 00:31:19,640
Speaker 1: on them because you know they're gonna be there for

647
00:31:19,720 --> 00:31:22,160
Speaker 1: you regardless, and they love you, so you start being

648
00:31:22,160 --> 00:31:24,480
Speaker 1: a brat to them, and so I'm just like, I

649
00:31:24,520 --> 00:31:26,320
Speaker 1: don't even want to do this, like like you know,

650
00:31:26,320 --> 00:31:28,200
Speaker 1: when I get I'm kind of alone with Chris and

651
00:31:28,240 --> 00:31:29,920
Speaker 1: one other guy that I'm like, he won't tell anyone,

652
00:31:29,960 --> 00:31:32,920
Speaker 1: I'm being a little ingreat and I'm just like, yeah,

653
00:31:32,920 --> 00:31:35,920
Speaker 1: I guess I'm writing, Yeah it's raining outside, cool, Yeah

654
00:31:36,040 --> 00:31:38,000
Speaker 1: I look look like I was just being abraut, like

655
00:31:38,120 --> 00:31:40,080
Speaker 1: gonna funk it up and just look stupid again and

656
00:31:40,280 --> 00:31:41,960
Speaker 1: trying I'm like letting out and he's kind of like,

657
00:31:42,880 --> 00:31:44,680
Speaker 1: are you mad at me because you're doing this? Like

658
00:31:45,200 --> 00:31:46,600
Speaker 1: and in my head, I'm like, yeah, it was your

659
00:31:46,600 --> 00:31:48,720
Speaker 1: fucking idea. You added this to my day and you

660
00:31:48,760 --> 00:31:50,600
Speaker 1: don't know how tired I am and you're not looking

661
00:31:50,600 --> 00:31:53,440
Speaker 1: out for me, and I'm like And later on that

662
00:31:53,520 --> 00:31:56,680
Speaker 1: came up as like I felt really weird that day.

663
00:31:56,680 --> 00:31:58,880
Speaker 1: It felt like you were like making it like I

664
00:31:59,000 --> 00:32:02,040
Speaker 1: forced you to do this thing, and like and I go, yeah,

665
00:32:02,560 --> 00:32:04,680
Speaker 1: I did make it that way. Like when I re examined,

666
00:32:04,720 --> 00:32:07,000
Speaker 1: did I go, oh my god, you got me in

667
00:32:07,040 --> 00:32:09,520
Speaker 1: the world. I was being the biggest brat. You got

668
00:32:09,560 --> 00:32:11,560
Speaker 1: me in my baby. I was being a baby because

669
00:32:11,560 --> 00:32:13,760
Speaker 1: I was tired, so I had no way to be

670
00:32:13,800 --> 00:32:18,800
Speaker 1: like strong emotionally. I was embarrassed, which makes me like you,

671
00:32:18,800 --> 00:32:20,800
Speaker 1: you know, you trip over something on the sidewalk and

672
00:32:20,800 --> 00:32:22,800
Speaker 1: you go, what a funk because you're so embarrassed. When

673
00:32:22,800 --> 00:32:26,280
Speaker 1: you get embarrassed, yeah, you get you you either get

674
00:32:26,320 --> 00:32:28,040
Speaker 1: angry or you get like, oh I'm meant to do that.

675
00:32:28,120 --> 00:32:31,600
Speaker 1: You get killed, or you get angry like this wasn't

676
00:32:31,640 --> 00:32:34,360
Speaker 1: my decision at all. Yes, And so that's what I did.

677
00:32:34,400 --> 00:32:36,080
Speaker 1: I was like, and so I explained him last night.

678
00:32:36,120 --> 00:32:39,480
Speaker 1: I was like, I, you're so right. I was blaming

679
00:32:39,480 --> 00:32:41,520
Speaker 1: you for that because I couldn't blame myself because I

680
00:32:41,560 --> 00:32:44,520
Speaker 1: was already so embarrassed. I had to give the blame

681
00:32:44,560 --> 00:32:47,240
Speaker 1: to someone. And he goes, but I just suggested it. You.

682
00:32:47,240 --> 00:32:48,560
Speaker 1: You were the one that was like, I want to

683
00:32:48,600 --> 00:32:52,200
Speaker 1: do it, and you were enthusiastic, and I was like, yeah,

684
00:32:52,400 --> 00:32:55,760
Speaker 1: you're right, it's fucking I was like, because he goes.

685
00:32:57,360 --> 00:33:02,840
Speaker 1: It was interesting because he said I like sometimes we

686
00:33:02,920 --> 00:33:04,800
Speaker 1: say things to each other that we just go That

687
00:33:04,880 --> 00:33:06,720
Speaker 1: felt really good to hear, like I needed to hear that.

688
00:33:06,760 --> 00:33:08,360
Speaker 1: I didn't know I needed to hear that. I told

689
00:33:08,400 --> 00:33:12,760
Speaker 1: him once that, you know, because I meet a lot

690
00:33:12,800 --> 00:33:15,080
Speaker 1: of hot guys and guys that on paper seem like

691
00:33:15,160 --> 00:33:18,320
Speaker 1: really like amazing and maybe from afar, like they're like

692
00:33:18,480 --> 00:33:21,440
Speaker 1: celebrities that I've maybe like drooled over or like I

693
00:33:21,520 --> 00:33:24,040
Speaker 1: like their character, and then I meet them and I'm

694
00:33:24,080 --> 00:33:25,480
Speaker 1: just like, I give them a lot more than they

695
00:33:25,520 --> 00:33:27,640
Speaker 1: deserve because I don't know them, I've projected a lot

696
00:33:27,680 --> 00:33:30,640
Speaker 1: onto them, they're hot whatever. And there was something about

697
00:33:30,720 --> 00:33:33,520
Speaker 1: Chris and going to therapy with me and like really

698
00:33:33,560 --> 00:33:36,080
Speaker 1: working on himself and being emotionally vulnerable that I was,

699
00:33:36,120 --> 00:33:38,560
Speaker 1: like I told him one day, I was like, every

700
00:33:38,560 --> 00:33:40,240
Speaker 1: time I see a hot guy now that I might

701
00:33:40,280 --> 00:33:42,440
Speaker 1: project a lot of like perfection onto of like or

702
00:33:42,480 --> 00:33:44,920
Speaker 1: I start getting in those what ifs I dated him.

703
00:33:44,960 --> 00:33:46,560
Speaker 1: If I'm having a bad day with Chris or whatever

704
00:33:46,560 --> 00:33:49,520
Speaker 1: it is, I always see a little meter above their

705
00:33:49,560 --> 00:33:53,560
Speaker 1: head now that is on zero for like emotional intelligence,

706
00:33:53,560 --> 00:33:56,360
Speaker 1: because I just haven't met someone to me that's willing

707
00:33:56,400 --> 00:34:02,080
Speaker 1: to be as nimble and like doing uncomfortable things emotionally

708
00:34:02,120 --> 00:34:03,840
Speaker 1: that Chris has. And I was like, for me, your

709
00:34:03,880 --> 00:34:06,720
Speaker 1: meter is on like nine, like you've got but you

710
00:34:06,720 --> 00:34:10,319
Speaker 1: you challenge yourself, and like I just I don't. I

711
00:34:10,360 --> 00:34:13,520
Speaker 1: don't let guys start out on like nines anymore. They

712
00:34:13,600 --> 00:34:15,640
Speaker 1: have to prove a nine. To me, they're all on zero.

713
00:34:15,680 --> 00:34:17,600
Speaker 1: And he was like, there's something about that that really

714
00:34:17,640 --> 00:34:20,360
Speaker 1: made me feel safe, like because I'm sure there is

715
00:34:20,400 --> 00:34:22,640
Speaker 1: a part of him that's like you're famous. Now you're

716
00:34:22,640 --> 00:34:25,880
Speaker 1: gonna meet guys that are very shiny and like if

717
00:34:25,920 --> 00:34:27,439
Speaker 1: we're having a bad day and you go on set

718
00:34:27,440 --> 00:34:30,319
Speaker 1: with someone who's like fun and like flirtatious and like

719
00:34:30,360 --> 00:34:33,520
Speaker 1: you've seen him before on paparazzi shots and he looks

720
00:34:33,560 --> 00:34:37,120
Speaker 1: so cool and like maybe he played emotionally evolved character,

721
00:34:37,239 --> 00:34:39,280
Speaker 1: like you might give him a lot more than he deserves.

722
00:34:39,280 --> 00:34:41,160
Speaker 1: And I'm like, no, I don't do that anymore, Like

723
00:34:41,239 --> 00:34:43,080
Speaker 1: I I have everyone starting at zero. You have to

724
00:34:43,160 --> 00:34:45,319
Speaker 1: earn that to me, And he was like that made

725
00:34:45,320 --> 00:34:47,319
Speaker 1: me feel really good. And then the other night he

726
00:34:47,360 --> 00:34:51,400
Speaker 1: had told me that, like, no matter what, I just

727
00:34:51,520 --> 00:34:54,360
Speaker 1: know you're a good person. I always and if anyone

728
00:34:54,400 --> 00:34:57,280
Speaker 1: were to ever say you're a bitch, I would really

729
00:34:57,719 --> 00:34:59,600
Speaker 1: I think I mentioned this before it just he goes,

730
00:34:59,640 --> 00:35:01,600
Speaker 1: I would never let someone call you a bit I

731
00:35:01,600 --> 00:35:04,360
Speaker 1: think a lot of times like people can say that

732
00:35:04,400 --> 00:35:06,920
Speaker 1: women are bitches are like maybe in the past. I

733
00:35:06,960 --> 00:35:09,920
Speaker 1: don't think he said this, but he could maybe think

734
00:35:09,960 --> 00:35:12,200
Speaker 1: I was or like maybe I was up to no

735
00:35:12,320 --> 00:35:14,600
Speaker 1: good or like was out for myself. He was like,

736
00:35:15,400 --> 00:35:17,560
Speaker 1: I know that you're a good person, and there's just

737
00:35:17,640 --> 00:35:19,680
Speaker 1: something about that that made me feel the same way

738
00:35:19,680 --> 00:35:22,719
Speaker 1: that dumb meter thing I said. I was just like, Okay,

739
00:35:22,760 --> 00:35:25,480
Speaker 1: if we're on that base level where you can even

740
00:35:25,480 --> 00:35:26,880
Speaker 1: though I make you mad and some days I can

741
00:35:26,920 --> 00:35:28,640
Speaker 1: seem like a bitch, if you can get to the

742
00:35:28,680 --> 00:35:32,879
Speaker 1: place of like, her bitchiness is coming not because she's

743
00:35:32,880 --> 00:35:36,399
Speaker 1: inherently a bad person, it's something's something's up that's making

744
00:35:36,440 --> 00:35:40,040
Speaker 1: that happen. I can always be okay being myself or

745
00:35:40,320 --> 00:35:43,799
Speaker 1: like that I have I have the freedom to be

746
00:35:43,840 --> 00:35:46,279
Speaker 1: a bit sometimes because you know, I'm not one, and

747
00:35:46,320 --> 00:35:48,640
Speaker 1: that that day I'm It's Halloween, you know, and I'm

748
00:35:48,719 --> 00:35:51,000
Speaker 1: dressing up as a bit, and there's just something very

749
00:35:51,040 --> 00:35:54,600
Speaker 1: nice about having that. Do you really, is there anything

750
00:35:54,600 --> 00:35:56,040
Speaker 1: that you've been given like that where you go, oh,

751
00:35:56,080 --> 00:35:57,880
Speaker 1: I didn't know I needed to hear that compliment or

752
00:35:57,920 --> 00:36:00,600
Speaker 1: I needed to hear Brenna say that. Is there anything

753
00:36:00,600 --> 00:36:03,680
Speaker 1: that stretch you? Well? What strikes me is the suggestion thing,

754
00:36:03,840 --> 00:36:06,839
Speaker 1: the idea that like, I've done things where like someone

755
00:36:06,880 --> 00:36:09,040
Speaker 1: will suggest something that I don't want to do it,

756
00:36:09,120 --> 00:36:11,439
Speaker 1: but I do it and then I take it out

757
00:36:11,480 --> 00:36:17,359
Speaker 1: on They don't deserve the anger or whatever, but because

758
00:36:17,400 --> 00:36:20,120
Speaker 1: I agreed to it. And so I've done that many

759
00:36:20,160 --> 00:36:22,279
Speaker 1: times in my life where someone's like, hey, let's go

760
00:36:22,400 --> 00:36:26,440
Speaker 1: do this and I'm like yeah, instead of having like

761
00:36:26,760 --> 00:36:30,239
Speaker 1: uh not an argument or a disagreement about wanting to

762
00:36:30,280 --> 00:36:32,879
Speaker 1: do it, or like maybe I'll feel guilty because they'll

763
00:36:32,920 --> 00:36:34,880
Speaker 1: be like, well, I thought it would be a good idea,

764
00:36:34,960 --> 00:36:36,480
Speaker 1: and so then you just do it. And then you're

765
00:36:36,520 --> 00:36:40,080
Speaker 1: there at the thing and you're like, what the anyway

766
00:36:40,200 --> 00:36:42,280
Speaker 1: you forced me to do it? Because I was trying

767
00:36:42,280 --> 00:36:44,319
Speaker 1: to be nice and I and I'm scared that you're

768
00:36:44,320 --> 00:36:46,160
Speaker 1: gonna get bad at me if I'm not nice. That

769
00:36:46,239 --> 00:36:48,640
Speaker 1: is still you What if that person would get mad

770
00:36:48,680 --> 00:36:50,759
Speaker 1: at you? Like, okay, well then deal with that, like

771
00:36:51,160 --> 00:36:54,920
Speaker 1: stop people, please. Where I've gotten to or I'm trying

772
00:36:54,960 --> 00:36:57,319
Speaker 1: to is like, even if I do put myself in

773
00:36:57,400 --> 00:37:00,279
Speaker 1: that predicament that I don't want to be in, I go,

774
00:37:01,280 --> 00:37:04,320
Speaker 1: it's not there. It's stop pointing. Just stop pointing. Start

775
00:37:04,520 --> 00:37:06,800
Speaker 1: maybe learn a lesson of not saying yes too quickly

776
00:37:06,840 --> 00:37:09,640
Speaker 1: to things or being okay with when you get to

777
00:37:09,680 --> 00:37:12,360
Speaker 1: something going like I can it's okay for me to

778
00:37:12,440 --> 00:37:14,160
Speaker 1: not like this, even if I thought I once was

779
00:37:14,160 --> 00:37:16,640
Speaker 1: gonna like it, it's okay. It doesn't mean that I'm like,

780
00:37:17,080 --> 00:37:19,319
Speaker 1: here's the other crazy thing. You might really love it?

781
00:37:19,719 --> 00:37:23,600
Speaker 1: Oh yeah, I know. That's why Chris was talking about

782
00:37:23,560 --> 00:37:25,239
Speaker 1: pickle ball yesterday, and I just don't want to play

783
00:37:25,239 --> 00:37:28,240
Speaker 1: pickleball because I'm nervous about being unathletic around his family

784
00:37:28,239 --> 00:37:31,440
Speaker 1: who is athletic and like holds like that in high esteem.

785
00:37:31,560 --> 00:37:34,200
Speaker 1: Like I think I have this fear that they're going

786
00:37:34,239 --> 00:37:36,319
Speaker 1: to reject me as one of them if they see

787
00:37:36,360 --> 00:37:38,719
Speaker 1: how unathletically and cline I am. So I'd rather just

788
00:37:38,800 --> 00:37:41,439
Speaker 1: not be there and and have them not even think

789
00:37:41,440 --> 00:37:43,160
Speaker 1: of me, as opposed to going and being like, oh,

790
00:37:43,200 --> 00:37:44,840
Speaker 1: I don't need to play. Then they go, well, maybe

791
00:37:44,880 --> 00:37:47,680
Speaker 1: she's bad. Maybe we need like a montage where we

792
00:37:47,719 --> 00:37:50,719
Speaker 1: go and play pickleball and and you get really good

793
00:37:50,760 --> 00:37:53,239
Speaker 1: and you just show up like it would be so

794
00:37:53,280 --> 00:37:56,279
Speaker 1: funny to train. I'm not kidding you. I think I

795
00:37:56,320 --> 00:37:58,120
Speaker 1: might start taking to pick the ball lessons and then

796
00:37:58,520 --> 00:38:00,600
Speaker 1: show up one day. He does, how watch my poet.

797
00:38:01,280 --> 00:38:03,360
Speaker 1: This would be amazing. Please do not tell him that

798
00:38:03,440 --> 00:38:04,719
Speaker 1: is a good idea. And I think I'm going to

799
00:38:04,800 --> 00:38:08,279
Speaker 1: do it as a Oh I love it. Okay, let's

800
00:38:08,280 --> 00:38:11,200
Speaker 1: go to break and come back with all fan tracks

801
00:38:11,400 --> 00:38:17,160
Speaker 1: all day long. All right, we're back. Let's get to it.

802
00:38:18,000 --> 00:38:19,520
Speaker 1: We're supposed to do an all fan track show, but

803
00:38:19,560 --> 00:38:21,440
Speaker 1: you guys know, we get all found tangents, so the

804
00:38:21,480 --> 00:38:23,040
Speaker 1: rest of the show will be all fan tracks, but

805
00:38:23,080 --> 00:38:26,319
Speaker 1: it's you know, it's a regular size segment. Let's do it.

806
00:38:30,680 --> 00:38:33,279
Speaker 1: You guys seriously need to look at the YouTube of

807
00:38:33,360 --> 00:38:38,000
Speaker 1: this because I'm covering myself in all the the things

808
00:38:38,040 --> 00:38:41,440
Speaker 1: I got just in fucking New Jersey this weekend. So

809
00:38:41,520 --> 00:38:46,640
Speaker 1: many letters, This beautiful painting that bestie made of her parent.

810
00:38:47,880 --> 00:38:50,520
Speaker 1: She has a cockatoo that has a shirt on that

811
00:38:50,560 --> 00:38:53,000
Speaker 1: she made it a little like you know, um vest

812
00:38:53,120 --> 00:38:55,000
Speaker 1: that says bestie on it, so her parrot. I forget

813
00:38:55,000 --> 00:38:58,400
Speaker 1: the parrots, same bestie. It says don't be cut. On

814
00:38:58,440 --> 00:39:00,480
Speaker 1: the frame. It says the Nikolaser podcast. She did the

815
00:39:00,520 --> 00:39:02,960
Speaker 1: logo that from the T shirt, which besties have been

816
00:39:03,000 --> 00:39:05,480
Speaker 1: wearing that T shirt, the Nikkei Layser podcast t shirts.

817
00:39:05,480 --> 00:39:08,399
Speaker 1: They're so fucking cute. I love them. I love our merch.

818
00:39:08,760 --> 00:39:11,759
Speaker 1: It says mascot because this this I forget. Oh it's

819
00:39:12,080 --> 00:39:14,560
Speaker 1: miss Marilyn Monroe is the name of the parrot, and

820
00:39:14,600 --> 00:39:16,359
Speaker 1: I want to thank that bestie. I forget her name,

821
00:39:16,400 --> 00:39:19,720
Speaker 1: but she was lovely and we're gonna hang this up. Um,

822
00:39:19,800 --> 00:39:22,040
Speaker 1: you know, I got so many cards, let me just

823
00:39:22,040 --> 00:39:25,080
Speaker 1: pick one at random. Noah, can I read a letter?

824
00:39:25,120 --> 00:39:30,319
Speaker 1: That one of our best he's wrote to you. It's

825
00:39:30,960 --> 00:39:33,520
Speaker 1: there's a bracelet in it, a moonstone bracelet. It says

826
00:39:33,560 --> 00:39:35,680
Speaker 1: dear Noah, and she got your name right. N o

827
00:39:35,800 --> 00:39:38,600
Speaker 1: A is just in case Bessie's want to know know what.

828
00:39:38,719 --> 00:39:40,680
Speaker 1: You are one of the most genuinely kindest person I

829
00:39:40,680 --> 00:39:43,240
Speaker 1: have ever people I've ever met. You're so soft spoken,

830
00:39:43,280 --> 00:39:45,319
Speaker 1: and sometimes I wish I could be, but that's not

831
00:39:45,400 --> 00:39:47,680
Speaker 1: for me. You have so many unique things about you,

832
00:39:47,719 --> 00:39:50,800
Speaker 1: and just that makes you one of the greatest and interesting,

833
00:39:50,920 --> 00:39:53,040
Speaker 1: most interesting people I know. You've taught me to look

834
00:39:53,040 --> 00:39:55,880
Speaker 1: at situations differently and to take different perspectives into account.

835
00:39:56,160 --> 00:39:57,640
Speaker 1: I see this when you chime in when Nicki and

836
00:39:57,640 --> 00:40:00,120
Speaker 1: Andrew have a disagreement. You have such great ideas for

837
00:40:00,160 --> 00:40:02,080
Speaker 1: the pod and are so creative and make the pods

838
00:40:02,080 --> 00:40:04,600
Speaker 1: such a fun experience. Love your white board, by the

839
00:40:04,640 --> 00:40:07,120
Speaker 1: way you do things and ask so politely and just

840
00:40:07,160 --> 00:40:09,200
Speaker 1: show how great of that just shows how great of

841
00:40:09,200 --> 00:40:11,520
Speaker 1: a person you are. Reminds me to be more patient.

842
00:40:12,080 --> 00:40:14,480
Speaker 1: Love obvious voice in the fant Rex segment, which is

843
00:40:14,480 --> 00:40:18,040
Speaker 1: my favorite because hearing other besties stories and connections makes

844
00:40:18,080 --> 00:40:19,920
Speaker 1: me so happy for them that they also have a

845
00:40:19,920 --> 00:40:22,280
Speaker 1: space in this podcast. I can't wait to meet you someday,

846
00:40:22,320 --> 00:40:27,279
Speaker 1: but keep killing it. Jeesasi love Edith and she was

847
00:40:27,320 --> 00:40:29,959
Speaker 1: at the Madison nine PM show, so shout out to Edith.

848
00:40:30,080 --> 00:40:32,560
Speaker 1: She wrote us all letters Andrew got his mind. I

849
00:40:32,560 --> 00:40:35,160
Speaker 1: haven't read read it on another one, but yes, I

850
00:40:35,200 --> 00:40:38,080
Speaker 1: feel that way about Noah and I love that Noah,

851
00:40:38,120 --> 00:40:41,400
Speaker 1: you know, sometimes gets zero airtime on episodes because we

852
00:40:41,480 --> 00:40:46,920
Speaker 1: are just chatterboxes, but people still like that letter. I

853
00:40:47,040 --> 00:40:51,279
Speaker 1: almost like, I cannot believe how how they get they

854
00:40:51,320 --> 00:40:54,040
Speaker 1: get her so much. That is that is Noah to

855
00:40:54,160 --> 00:40:59,080
Speaker 1: a fucking tea of being patient, thoughtful, flawed, open about

856
00:40:59,120 --> 00:41:03,400
Speaker 1: her flaws, are standing working on herself, like Noah is

857
00:41:04,680 --> 00:41:08,360
Speaker 1: dividing balls with her nose, admitting adorable things, her adorable voice,

858
00:41:08,360 --> 00:41:11,640
Speaker 1: someone who was just such a good friend, was such

859
00:41:11,680 --> 00:41:13,719
Speaker 1: a good friend to me. The other night when I,

860
00:41:14,200 --> 00:41:17,080
Speaker 1: you know, reach out to her about something that we

861
00:41:17,080 --> 00:41:19,640
Speaker 1: were going to talk about offline, she shared this thing

862
00:41:19,680 --> 00:41:21,960
Speaker 1: that she's going through with me, and we were talking

863
00:41:21,960 --> 00:41:24,120
Speaker 1: about it and sharing and it was just so so

864
00:41:24,239 --> 00:41:26,560
Speaker 1: nice to catch up in that way. And then you know,

865
00:41:27,400 --> 00:41:30,279
Speaker 1: it's so like Noah does, like she shares this thing

866
00:41:30,320 --> 00:41:33,000
Speaker 1: that like should take up hours of our conversation and

867
00:41:33,040 --> 00:41:35,760
Speaker 1: dissecting going through and then I share a little something

868
00:41:35,840 --> 00:41:38,520
Speaker 1: like just a little like yeah, I've actually been feeling

869
00:41:38,560 --> 00:41:40,560
Speaker 1: that way about this, and she's like, wait, what's going

870
00:41:40,560 --> 00:41:42,440
Speaker 1: on with that? And then it turns then we talked

871
00:41:42,480 --> 00:41:45,440
Speaker 1: for so much longer about my dumb little thing, and

872
00:41:45,440 --> 00:41:47,719
Speaker 1: it was just like if it wasn't dumb. No one

873
00:41:47,760 --> 00:41:49,759
Speaker 1: never makes me feel dumb about my problem. She never

874
00:41:49,800 --> 00:41:51,879
Speaker 1: makes me feel like I'm not being a good friend

875
00:41:51,880 --> 00:41:53,919
Speaker 1: to her, even though there are times where I go like, man,

876
00:41:53,960 --> 00:41:55,799
Speaker 1: i haven't checked in in a while. All I do

877
00:41:55,880 --> 00:41:58,880
Speaker 1: is work with her. You're just to really just a

878
00:41:58,960 --> 00:42:00,840
Speaker 1: gem of a person and so good, damn good at

879
00:42:00,880 --> 00:42:05,279
Speaker 1: your general girl. I love to hear that. You don't

880
00:42:05,280 --> 00:42:08,239
Speaker 1: want to hear adorable. Yes, it's so, it's but I

881
00:42:08,320 --> 00:42:11,080
Speaker 1: love that Edith saw you so completely in that. Let's

882
00:42:11,080 --> 00:42:13,960
Speaker 1: get to um, Let's get to some of our messages.

883
00:42:14,120 --> 00:42:18,160
Speaker 1: Voice all right, I'm want to start off with Nick

884
00:42:18,320 --> 00:42:23,719
Speaker 1: from Germany. You're gonna love this. Hi, Andrew, NICKI and Noah.

885
00:42:23,800 --> 00:42:26,440
Speaker 1: I'm Nick and I'm a bestie from Germany. And I

886
00:42:26,480 --> 00:42:30,960
Speaker 1: wanted to tell you a mispronunciation and cursed story today.

887
00:42:31,239 --> 00:42:33,880
Speaker 1: A few weeks ago, a friend came back home from

888
00:42:33,960 --> 00:42:37,759
Speaker 1: the US where she lived the past year, and somehow

889
00:42:37,840 --> 00:42:42,160
Speaker 1: it's very common that Germans who lived abroad sometimes pretend

890
00:42:42,200 --> 00:42:45,480
Speaker 1: they don't know German words anymore. So a few days

891
00:42:45,520 --> 00:42:50,239
Speaker 1: ago Germany's Next Top Model. It's the German version of

892
00:42:51,000 --> 00:42:53,600
Speaker 1: Next Top Model by Tyra Banks. If you know that show,

893
00:42:54,239 --> 00:42:57,719
Speaker 1: it's very huge here in Germany and they are all

894
00:42:57,760 --> 00:43:02,320
Speaker 1: about diversity this year, so there are some fatigued plus

895
00:43:02,360 --> 00:43:06,600
Speaker 1: size or best ages, you know. And my friends said

896
00:43:06,800 --> 00:43:11,320
Speaker 1: as we watch, oh, I love that there is so much.

897
00:43:13,480 --> 00:43:18,880
Speaker 1: I don't know the German word viarity this year. I

898
00:43:19,000 --> 00:43:24,759
Speaker 1: told her, first, bitch, you are so for pretending to

899
00:43:24,800 --> 00:43:28,720
Speaker 1: not know your native language anymore, and second, you don't

900
00:43:28,719 --> 00:43:35,920
Speaker 1: know the English word either variety. So that's my little story.

901
00:43:36,080 --> 00:43:38,719
Speaker 1: I hope you guys have all the swells. I love

902
00:43:38,760 --> 00:43:46,160
Speaker 1: you guys, love the Oh my god, what the hell

903
00:43:46,800 --> 00:43:50,480
Speaker 1: that is that that guy went and recorded a just

904
00:43:50,600 --> 00:43:53,399
Speaker 1: kidding from the podcast to use it on I mean

905
00:43:53,480 --> 00:43:57,719
Speaker 1: that nick standing ovation for that. Thank you so much. All.

906
00:43:57,760 --> 00:44:01,000
Speaker 1: I want to watch Germany's Next Up because that show

907
00:44:01,080 --> 00:44:03,160
Speaker 1: is not big in the US anymore like it used to.

908
00:44:03,239 --> 00:44:06,680
Speaker 1: Be but man, when that show was like popular, it

909
00:44:06,760 --> 00:44:08,359
Speaker 1: was so fun to watch, So it would be kind

910
00:44:08,360 --> 00:44:11,280
Speaker 1: of cool to watch a country that really is obsessed

911
00:44:11,320 --> 00:44:13,160
Speaker 1: with that show still and like puts that much effort

912
00:44:13,200 --> 00:44:15,279
Speaker 1: into it and cares that much. It might be a

913
00:44:15,320 --> 00:44:18,400
Speaker 1: good watch. Um. That reminds me so much of the

914
00:44:18,440 --> 00:44:21,000
Speaker 1: Ilari Abaldwin thing of when she's on the Today Show

915
00:44:21,040 --> 00:44:23,319
Speaker 1: and she goes how you say cucumber like during the

916
00:44:23,360 --> 00:44:26,799
Speaker 1: segment because she speaks Spanish so much, I will say

917
00:44:26,800 --> 00:44:30,600
Speaker 1: that there who told me that? When you do speak

918
00:44:30,880 --> 00:44:34,240
Speaker 1: maybe sometimes the way that you besties say that. Sometimes

919
00:44:34,239 --> 00:44:36,560
Speaker 1: you say my friend Nicky and people are like, who's

920
00:44:36,560 --> 00:44:37,919
Speaker 1: your friend Nicki? And you're like, oh, I'm not really

921
00:44:37,920 --> 00:44:40,400
Speaker 1: friends which podcast? It's how I feel about Reddit sometimes,

922
00:44:40,400 --> 00:44:41,719
Speaker 1: where I'm like, did a friend tell me this? Or

923
00:44:41,840 --> 00:44:45,040
Speaker 1: just these people being so open um. Someone said in

924
00:44:45,040 --> 00:44:47,719
Speaker 1: a Reddit defending her, I think it was that that

925
00:44:48,200 --> 00:44:50,759
Speaker 1: when you speak another language sometimes so much you do

926
00:44:50,920 --> 00:44:53,239
Speaker 1: forget the English word. I think your friend was trying

927
00:44:53,239 --> 00:44:54,760
Speaker 1: to be kid, but I want to give the benefit

928
00:44:54,800 --> 00:44:58,080
Speaker 1: of the doubt that sometimes you just you can't make

929
00:44:58,120 --> 00:45:01,000
Speaker 1: that translation. And I almost give yet that benefit of

930
00:45:01,000 --> 00:45:04,839
Speaker 1: the doubt. Maybe she did forget how you say cucumber um? Also,

931
00:45:05,600 --> 00:45:07,600
Speaker 1: but also how do you say is probably how you

932
00:45:07,600 --> 00:45:10,279
Speaker 1: would say if your native English speaker, you wouldn't say

933
00:45:10,280 --> 00:45:13,319
Speaker 1: how you say, you know, Like, I also think that's

934
00:45:13,360 --> 00:45:16,480
Speaker 1: suspicious to do the English like a foreigner. I'm thinking

935
00:45:16,480 --> 00:45:19,640
Speaker 1: about how many times I've said variety and it's really

936
00:45:19,640 --> 00:45:24,319
Speaker 1: only with like cereal or potato chips. Yeah, Like, it's

937
00:45:24,360 --> 00:45:26,080
Speaker 1: not a word I say a lot. So I give

938
00:45:26,080 --> 00:45:28,160
Speaker 1: her to benefit doubt because that is not a word

939
00:45:28,800 --> 00:45:34,480
Speaker 1: that I if I forget it, but necessarily even diversity,

940
00:45:34,560 --> 00:45:37,920
Speaker 1: Like he's saying, like she could have picked any German

941
00:45:37,920 --> 00:45:40,440
Speaker 1: word that is like has a lot of different cultures

942
00:45:40,520 --> 00:45:42,960
Speaker 1: or like has a lot of different whatever it was

943
00:45:43,640 --> 00:45:46,160
Speaker 1: she could have she I have a feeling Nick knows

944
00:45:46,200 --> 00:45:48,800
Speaker 1: this friend better than we do. This friend is capable

945
00:45:48,840 --> 00:45:52,279
Speaker 1: of which does not make them a bad person. I'm wondering, Nick,

946
00:45:52,880 --> 00:45:55,799
Speaker 1: if you actually did say, and if she goes, what

947
00:45:55,880 --> 00:45:58,320
Speaker 1: does that mean? And you try to explain it because

948
00:45:58,320 --> 00:46:01,239
Speaker 1: a lot of times when you call out, it's such

949
00:46:01,280 --> 00:46:04,359
Speaker 1: an insult once you really explain it to someone, like

950
00:46:04,600 --> 00:46:06,640
Speaker 1: I think you're trying to be cool right now that

951
00:46:06,800 --> 00:46:10,120
Speaker 1: it's hard to like actually kill someone who you have

952
00:46:10,200 --> 00:46:12,440
Speaker 1: to then explain what kurd means. It's easy to kill

953
00:46:12,560 --> 00:46:14,400
Speaker 1: a revving engine because you just go kill and the

954
00:46:14,440 --> 00:46:16,040
Speaker 1: person is kind of like that sounded shitty, but I

955
00:46:16,040 --> 00:46:19,400
Speaker 1: don't know what it means. Um, maybe you just thought it,

956
00:46:19,560 --> 00:46:21,359
Speaker 1: but I want to know if you really did kill

957
00:46:21,400 --> 00:46:25,239
Speaker 1: your friend and what the in Germany or German in

958
00:46:25,280 --> 00:46:31,000
Speaker 1: Germany variety. Okay, let's go to the next one. Okay,

959
00:46:31,080 --> 00:46:35,520
Speaker 1: here's one from Ida. Hey, besties, hope you're having a

960
00:46:35,560 --> 00:46:38,960
Speaker 1: good day having all the swells everybody else as well.

961
00:46:39,360 --> 00:46:43,000
Speaker 1: I was just listening to the mullet House episode and

962
00:46:43,200 --> 00:46:48,360
Speaker 1: the conversation of the fact that, uh, the word pussy

963
00:46:48,560 --> 00:46:52,080
Speaker 1: and the word pussy sounds the same or similar, I

964
00:46:52,120 --> 00:46:55,600
Speaker 1: should say, um, is kind of funny. So I actually

965
00:46:55,600 --> 00:46:58,600
Speaker 1: have a story. Um. I was working at a hotel

966
00:46:59,320 --> 00:47:02,560
Speaker 1: and I had a very bad I think it was

967
00:47:02,600 --> 00:47:05,120
Speaker 1: like a cut on my finger or something like that,

968
00:47:05,640 --> 00:47:10,000
Speaker 1: and my manager was standing next to me. Uh, and

969
00:47:11,200 --> 00:47:13,440
Speaker 1: I'm a little bit of an odd duck. I'll kind

970
00:47:13,440 --> 00:47:18,840
Speaker 1: of just randomly shout things out loud. What I you know,

971
00:47:18,960 --> 00:47:24,320
Speaker 1: saw that my finger was pussy, And I say out loud,

972
00:47:25,400 --> 00:47:29,360
Speaker 1: my finger is so pussy. And my manager just looked

973
00:47:29,400 --> 00:47:34,080
Speaker 1: at me, laughed and walked away. Um, so that was

974
00:47:34,120 --> 00:47:36,839
Speaker 1: pretty funny. I hope you guys are having a good day.

975
00:47:36,880 --> 00:47:39,360
Speaker 1: I love you all. It's all. It's so funny, Eida,

976
00:47:39,480 --> 00:47:41,439
Speaker 1: because almost if you were to say my cut looks

977
00:47:41,440 --> 00:47:44,280
Speaker 1: like a pussy, it would be less disgusting than saying pussy,

978
00:47:44,320 --> 00:47:46,359
Speaker 1: because puss is such a gross word on its own,

979
00:47:46,400 --> 00:47:49,480
Speaker 1: it's almost worse than pussy. I love you that you

980
00:47:49,520 --> 00:47:51,720
Speaker 1: call yourself an odd duck. I think that's a very gentle,

981
00:47:51,920 --> 00:47:55,400
Speaker 1: sweet way to describe like what you know. Sometimes I go,

982
00:47:55,480 --> 00:47:57,880
Speaker 1: I'm a weirdo. Sorry, I'm just weird, and it's like

983
00:47:58,280 --> 00:48:01,800
Speaker 1: really derogatory, and like I always feel like an odd

984
00:48:01,880 --> 00:48:04,319
Speaker 1: duck too with some of the things anxieties I have

985
00:48:04,400 --> 00:48:05,960
Speaker 1: some of the weird things. I'm just like, I just

986
00:48:05,960 --> 00:48:08,239
Speaker 1: don't like that, and I'm I'm just weird. Sorry, I'm

987
00:48:08,239 --> 00:48:10,440
Speaker 1: just stupid. I just don't like it. And it's a

988
00:48:10,480 --> 00:48:12,640
Speaker 1: gentler way to be like just an odd duct because

989
00:48:12,719 --> 00:48:15,239
Speaker 1: ducks are so cute. I love that. And I want

990
00:48:15,239 --> 00:48:19,040
Speaker 1: to know what other things you scream out loud sometimes, Um,

991
00:48:19,080 --> 00:48:21,480
Speaker 1: but I do. And I also want to know if

992
00:48:21,520 --> 00:48:24,000
Speaker 1: you followed if your manager, if you ever went back

993
00:48:24,000 --> 00:48:25,759
Speaker 1: to your manager to be like, I was talking about

994
00:48:25,800 --> 00:48:27,840
Speaker 1: this cut on my hand and it looks like like

995
00:48:27,840 --> 00:48:29,600
Speaker 1: I wonder if it looked like a pussy too, because

996
00:48:29,600 --> 00:48:31,440
Speaker 1: a lot of times the pussies do look like wounds.

997
00:48:33,120 --> 00:48:36,000
Speaker 1: I mean, I think, Yeah, I'm trying to think of

998
00:48:36,040 --> 00:48:39,560
Speaker 1: other like words that we could use, maybe for when

999
00:48:39,600 --> 00:48:45,239
Speaker 1: you feel you know different, aut no like a nice no.

1000
00:48:45,320 --> 00:48:47,719
Speaker 1: Autistic is actually makes me feel nice because it's like

1001
00:48:47,760 --> 00:48:51,640
Speaker 1: it's not my fault and odd duck. What's another example?

1002
00:48:51,680 --> 00:48:55,040
Speaker 1: There was a great Reddit I was reading, Um, maybe

1003
00:48:55,040 --> 00:48:56,560
Speaker 1: I can just pull it up real quick. Sorry, now,

1004
00:48:56,640 --> 00:48:59,160
Speaker 1: are spending a lot of time on Reddit. I'd go

1005
00:48:59,239 --> 00:49:02,200
Speaker 1: every single night just like this is the eight reference.

1006
00:49:02,760 --> 00:49:05,000
Speaker 1: It's where I get everything. I don't understand what people

1007
00:49:05,000 --> 00:49:07,600
Speaker 1: do if they're not on Reddit. It's it's the cutest,

1008
00:49:07,800 --> 00:49:09,879
Speaker 1: most fun stuff. Oh there was Okay, let me just

1009
00:49:09,920 --> 00:49:12,880
Speaker 1: pull this up because this was so what's your favorite euphemist?

1010
00:49:12,960 --> 00:49:15,040
Speaker 1: This is different, but it says what's your favorite euphemism

1011
00:49:15,080 --> 00:49:17,759
Speaker 1: for a dumb person? And this is another way of like,

1012
00:49:17,920 --> 00:49:20,440
Speaker 1: you know, just like funny phrases. I could give them

1013
00:49:20,440 --> 00:49:22,719
Speaker 1: a penny for their thoughts. And I'd ask, and i'd

1014
00:49:22,719 --> 00:49:24,800
Speaker 1: get I could give them a penny for their thoughts,

1015
00:49:24,800 --> 00:49:27,680
Speaker 1: and I'd get changed back. Someone said, a beautiful lamp,

1016
00:49:27,719 --> 00:49:30,040
Speaker 1: but it sure isn't shining much. My great grandmother used

1017
00:49:30,040 --> 00:49:32,160
Speaker 1: to just say that he's got two brain cells left

1018
00:49:32,160 --> 00:49:35,320
Speaker 1: and they're fighting for third place. The wheel is spinning,

1019
00:49:35,360 --> 00:49:38,600
Speaker 1: but the hamsters dead. That made me. I love that.

1020
00:49:38,680 --> 00:49:41,319
Speaker 1: They sound like dr philis. Ums. You're the reason we've

1021
00:49:41,520 --> 00:49:45,920
Speaker 1: now listen. You're the reason we have worn in labels. Um.

1022
00:49:46,040 --> 00:49:49,839
Speaker 1: They have um. They must have put your swing too

1023
00:49:49,880 --> 00:49:52,480
Speaker 1: close to a wall as a kid. You're Oh, this

1024
00:49:52,520 --> 00:49:59,560
Speaker 1: one's good, honey, You're less useful than a chocolate teapot. Yeah,

1025
00:49:59,800 --> 00:50:02,919
Speaker 1: it's so good. Um, all right, let me just read

1026
00:50:02,960 --> 00:50:05,560
Speaker 1: this one really quickly. I just opened this randomly. This

1027
00:50:05,600 --> 00:50:08,000
Speaker 1: is from a bestie I think in Montclair, New Jersey.

1028
00:50:08,520 --> 00:50:11,560
Speaker 1: From a bestie. It says she printed this up. It

1029
00:50:11,600 --> 00:50:14,960
Speaker 1: looks like a newsletter. There's pictures of us on it.

1030
00:50:14,880 --> 00:50:18,040
Speaker 1: It looks like like, oh, like my synagogues newsletter. Yes,

1031
00:50:18,080 --> 00:50:21,360
Speaker 1: it does look like that. It's from bestie Kristen Um

1032
00:50:21,400 --> 00:50:25,680
Speaker 1: on Instagram. She's fly Underscore Yellow Underscore Bird Underscore Fly

1033
00:50:25,800 --> 00:50:29,160
Speaker 1: Fly Yellow Bird Fly Hi, Nik, congratulations on your well

1034
00:50:29,200 --> 00:50:32,160
Speaker 1: to serve success. And it is so jackpot that someone

1035
00:50:32,200 --> 00:50:34,920
Speaker 1: like you with such such a great grand platform chooses

1036
00:50:34,920 --> 00:50:36,480
Speaker 1: to be a voice for all animals. Your message for

1037
00:50:36,560 --> 00:50:38,840
Speaker 1: kindness and respect to animals is reaching so many of this.

1038
00:50:38,960 --> 00:50:41,200
Speaker 1: I remember meeting her, she gave me Vegan shirts too,

1039
00:50:41,520 --> 00:50:43,839
Speaker 1: and your enlightenment is undoubtedly helping animals in some way

1040
00:50:43,880 --> 00:50:46,040
Speaker 1: across the world. God bless folks like you, Ricky your vase,

1041
00:50:46,080 --> 00:50:49,000
Speaker 1: and at Leasha Silverstone. Hell fucking us, I didn't realize

1042
00:50:49,000 --> 00:50:51,640
Speaker 1: this was going to be like such a um like.

1043
00:50:52,400 --> 00:50:54,239
Speaker 1: I'm not choosing this because I'm like, guys, look how

1044
00:50:54,239 --> 00:50:56,799
Speaker 1: sweet I am. It is pure enjoyment to throw in

1045
00:50:56,840 --> 00:50:58,800
Speaker 1: my air pods and spend an hour with no Drukie

1046
00:50:59,320 --> 00:51:01,399
Speaker 1: and other best das while I am going through my day.

1047
00:51:01,400 --> 00:51:04,040
Speaker 1: Thank you for this podcast. Listeners benefit from your encouragement

1048
00:51:04,040 --> 00:51:07,120
Speaker 1: to dare share and bear our feelings. I love dare

1049
00:51:07,200 --> 00:51:11,120
Speaker 1: share bear what oh that's got to be a segment

1050
00:51:11,280 --> 00:51:15,560
Speaker 1: name that is good with which foster's healthy relationships of

1051
00:51:15,560 --> 00:51:18,120
Speaker 1: our own and in between sweet belly laughs. You're even

1052
00:51:18,120 --> 00:51:20,520
Speaker 1: still beliefs in those still striving to reach a goal

1053
00:51:20,719 --> 00:51:23,520
Speaker 1: and confidence in those contemplating a change. What's more, you

1054
00:51:23,560 --> 00:51:26,239
Speaker 1: often suggest tools to deal with guilt and temptation and

1055
00:51:26,280 --> 00:51:28,920
Speaker 1: resources for those wanting to incorporate better health and wellness

1056
00:51:28,960 --> 00:51:31,680
Speaker 1: into everyday life. You all absolutely rock. Thanks again for

1057
00:51:31,719 --> 00:51:35,320
Speaker 1: all you do. Also just to share, sorry Andrew Nikki,

1058
00:51:35,680 --> 00:51:38,840
Speaker 1: please please careful with that cute baby talk voice. Sometimes

1059
00:51:38,840 --> 00:51:41,320
Speaker 1: it seems like you're going to send Andrew into outer space,

1060
00:51:41,640 --> 00:51:43,880
Speaker 1: like the sound is a feather to his taint or something.

1061
00:51:44,440 --> 00:51:47,720
Speaker 1: What does that mean? And I talked like this apparently

1062
00:51:47,760 --> 00:51:50,359
Speaker 1: I'm turned on by it. Oh um oh, and then

1063
00:51:50,360 --> 00:51:52,640
Speaker 1: she signs up. Oh, she said she saw us at

1064
00:51:52,640 --> 00:51:54,919
Speaker 1: the Walmont Theater in New Jersey, which was the most

1065
00:51:54,960 --> 00:51:59,239
Speaker 1: best the attended event I've ever done. And uh she

1066
00:51:59,360 --> 00:52:06,080
Speaker 1: signed off, just don't eat animals, thank you very much,

1067
00:52:06,520 --> 00:52:10,520
Speaker 1: bestie Kristen Um and she put little pictures of us.

1068
00:52:10,560 --> 00:52:11,680
Speaker 1: It was so nice. I don't even know where you

1069
00:52:11,680 --> 00:52:15,000
Speaker 1: get pink paper. That's like, I don't remember doing baby

1070
00:52:15,080 --> 00:52:17,239
Speaker 1: voices or you responding words. That must have been one

1071
00:52:17,239 --> 00:52:19,840
Speaker 1: episode that I just can't remember. And I came a lot.

1072
00:52:20,680 --> 00:52:23,439
Speaker 1: I do remember that episode. It was a lot of coming. Yeah,

1073
00:52:23,560 --> 00:52:27,640
Speaker 1: it was like a Shakespearean because that was with, Yeah,

1074
00:52:27,680 --> 00:52:30,600
Speaker 1: it wasn't about me, but it was daring the baby voice,

1075
00:52:30,680 --> 00:52:34,919
Speaker 1: daring um, but it was still wasn't you. I don't

1076
00:52:34,920 --> 00:52:36,759
Speaker 1: even like, oh, you know what. It was probably on

1077
00:52:36,800 --> 00:52:39,880
Speaker 1: the day where I was doing this, like the talking

1078
00:52:39,920 --> 00:52:42,759
Speaker 1: about Elizabeth Holmes. If I was pitching like this, or

1079
00:52:43,239 --> 00:52:46,000
Speaker 1: I have an idea for a blood mission, it's that episode. Um,

1080
00:52:46,040 --> 00:52:48,839
Speaker 1: let's do another fan thrax. Okay, you want to give

1081
00:52:48,920 --> 00:52:52,440
Speaker 1: us a advice. I love to give advice. All right,

1082
00:52:52,680 --> 00:52:57,200
Speaker 1: here's a voicemail from Michelle. Hey, Nikki, Andrew, and Noah.

1083
00:52:57,239 --> 00:53:00,799
Speaker 1: This is Michelle. I was listening to the podcast where

1084
00:53:00,800 --> 00:53:06,200
Speaker 1: you were talking about UM narcissists and alcoholics and how

1085
00:53:06,239 --> 00:53:08,560
Speaker 1: you have to stop being friends with them. And I

1086
00:53:08,600 --> 00:53:13,160
Speaker 1: have a situation where my childhood friend UM really only

1087
00:53:13,200 --> 00:53:17,279
Speaker 1: talks about herself any time we get together. But I

1088
00:53:17,360 --> 00:53:22,640
Speaker 1: was wondering how how would you recommend ending that relationship.

1089
00:53:22,760 --> 00:53:24,759
Speaker 1: Is it something that you just kind of slowly let

1090
00:53:24,880 --> 00:53:28,000
Speaker 1: fizzle out and stop reaching out to that person, or

1091
00:53:28,080 --> 00:53:30,839
Speaker 1: is it something where you would have a conversation with them,

1092
00:53:31,000 --> 00:53:35,600
Speaker 1: or what has been your experience with ending those types

1093
00:53:35,640 --> 00:53:38,480
Speaker 1: of relationships? And any advice you have would be great.

1094
00:53:38,719 --> 00:53:43,560
Speaker 1: Thanks by I'll let you take this one first. I

1095
00:53:43,600 --> 00:53:48,840
Speaker 1: mean for me, I think it depends if she changes

1096
00:53:48,880 --> 00:53:50,920
Speaker 1: what you want to have a friendship. I think you

1097
00:53:51,000 --> 00:53:53,040
Speaker 1: have to have a conversation with her first if you

1098
00:53:53,080 --> 00:53:57,400
Speaker 1: want to possibly keep it going explained, like how she

1099
00:53:57,480 --> 00:54:00,359
Speaker 1: makes you feel, how she doesn't ask you questions, how

1100
00:54:00,400 --> 00:54:03,719
Speaker 1: she just talks about herself. And then if she just goes, well,

1101
00:54:03,760 --> 00:54:05,920
Speaker 1: you know what, that's who I am, or she goes no,

1102
00:54:06,040 --> 00:54:09,600
Speaker 1: I don't and does and dismisses your feelings or cut

1103
00:54:09,640 --> 00:54:15,960
Speaker 1: you off. Um, I think you're right, but I also

1104
00:54:16,040 --> 00:54:19,279
Speaker 1: part of me goes she I hear the tone of

1105
00:54:19,280 --> 00:54:23,359
Speaker 1: her voice. She's done. And you know these people, it's

1106
00:54:23,400 --> 00:54:26,240
Speaker 1: almost like maybe you haven't been forthright with them about

1107
00:54:26,320 --> 00:54:29,759
Speaker 1: what you're feeling, but you've given them the tests of like,

1108
00:54:29,840 --> 00:54:31,400
Speaker 1: let's just see if they ever ask about me in

1109
00:54:31,400 --> 00:54:34,080
Speaker 1: this entire hangout, and you've given and you you can

1110
00:54:34,120 --> 00:54:36,239
Speaker 1: see you can be friends with them long enough that

1111
00:54:36,280 --> 00:54:40,440
Speaker 1: you know that there's something that is unfixable about this,

1112
00:54:40,640 --> 00:54:42,839
Speaker 1: or that they don't or maybe they don't take accountability

1113
00:54:42,840 --> 00:54:44,920
Speaker 1: for other things in their life. Every breakup they've ever

1114
00:54:44,920 --> 00:54:46,840
Speaker 1: had is the guys. But whatever it is, and you

1115
00:54:46,920 --> 00:54:49,440
Speaker 1: just know it's not this is not negotiable, or it

1116
00:54:49,480 --> 00:54:51,640
Speaker 1: probably is, And maybe you just don't even want to

1117
00:54:51,640 --> 00:54:54,399
Speaker 1: be friends with this person anymore, which, by the way,

1118
00:54:54,680 --> 00:54:56,760
Speaker 1: you're allowed to not want to be friends with someone.

1119
00:54:56,840 --> 00:54:59,880
Speaker 1: You are allowed to not want to be no accu

1120
00:55:00,000 --> 00:55:02,439
Speaker 1: doesn't anymore just because they're your cousin or cut things

1121
00:55:02,440 --> 00:55:04,680
Speaker 1: off with a brother or something. You are allowed to

1122
00:55:04,719 --> 00:55:07,560
Speaker 1: do those things if they aren't serving you anymore. And

1123
00:55:07,600 --> 00:55:09,239
Speaker 1: I think people feel so bad because they're like, well,

1124
00:55:09,280 --> 00:55:11,600
Speaker 1: I've known her since child, our parents are friends. I

1125
00:55:11,640 --> 00:55:14,880
Speaker 1: guess she doesn't have anyone else. She needs to learn

1126
00:55:14,960 --> 00:55:17,520
Speaker 1: that if she continues this, she's not gonna have anyone else.

1127
00:55:17,560 --> 00:55:19,520
Speaker 1: You don't need to be the one thing that's getting

1128
00:55:19,520 --> 00:55:21,000
Speaker 1: her to go. Well, at least I have her. I

1129
00:55:21,000 --> 00:55:26,080
Speaker 1: don't have to change. That's actually enabling. I said this before, possibly,

1130
00:55:26,160 --> 00:55:28,040
Speaker 1: but the best way a friend has cut it off

1131
00:55:28,080 --> 00:55:31,879
Speaker 1: with me is to say, babe, I'm going you can.

1132
00:55:32,040 --> 00:55:34,080
Speaker 1: You can, because this person probably is not going to

1133
00:55:34,160 --> 00:55:36,440
Speaker 1: ever accept any blame for themselves, and they're going to

1134
00:55:36,520 --> 00:55:39,080
Speaker 1: spend it anyway. And it is a youth thing ultimately,

1135
00:55:39,560 --> 00:55:41,479
Speaker 1: because you are being friends with someone, you've been friends

1136
00:55:41,480 --> 00:55:42,799
Speaker 1: with someone that for a long time has not been

1137
00:55:42,800 --> 00:55:46,120
Speaker 1: giving you what you need, which is a you problem. Um.

1138
00:55:46,160 --> 00:55:49,400
Speaker 1: As much as you could probably understand that what's the

1139
00:55:49,400 --> 00:55:55,560
Speaker 1: girl's name that rotus Megan Michelle Michelle Michelle, I feel

1140
00:55:55,600 --> 00:55:59,480
Speaker 1: like just say the next person. The time this person

1141
00:55:59,680 --> 00:56:02,399
Speaker 1: writes you, hey, babe, I'm just going through a lot

1142
00:56:02,480 --> 00:56:06,439
Speaker 1: right now in my life and I I just need

1143
00:56:06,520 --> 00:56:09,720
Speaker 1: some space. It has nothing to do with you, because

1144
00:56:09,719 --> 00:56:12,359
Speaker 1: honestly it probably it doesn't. What it has to do

1145
00:56:12,400 --> 00:56:15,520
Speaker 1: with is that you have boundaries now and this person

1146
00:56:15,600 --> 00:56:19,399
Speaker 1: isn't living up to them. So and if you make

1147
00:56:19,400 --> 00:56:21,520
Speaker 1: it about them, they're gonna get defensive, They're gonna come

1148
00:56:21,560 --> 00:56:23,920
Speaker 1: at you and try to change, They're gonna like keep going.

1149
00:56:24,520 --> 00:56:28,400
Speaker 1: You set a boundary of babe, I need some space, um,

1150
00:56:28,480 --> 00:56:30,400
Speaker 1: And I just don't think I'm gonna be able to

1151
00:56:30,440 --> 00:56:32,920
Speaker 1: hang out for a really long for a bit, and

1152
00:56:32,960 --> 00:56:36,240
Speaker 1: I'll let you know when i'm ready to again. That way,

1153
00:56:36,600 --> 00:56:39,640
Speaker 1: if they keep reaching out to you, it's done now.

1154
00:56:39,800 --> 00:56:41,600
Speaker 1: Maybe this person and you share friends and you're like,

1155
00:56:41,600 --> 00:56:43,120
Speaker 1: now I got to cut out all those people. No,

1156
00:56:43,239 --> 00:56:46,640
Speaker 1: you don't. You're allowed to cut out people in your life.

1157
00:56:46,640 --> 00:56:48,880
Speaker 1: You're allowed to and it might be awkward. It is

1158
00:56:48,880 --> 00:56:51,400
Speaker 1: a hard thing to do saying the word babe or

1159
00:56:51,400 --> 00:56:54,880
Speaker 1: whatever kind of loving thing you can say, doing in

1160
00:56:54,880 --> 00:56:58,360
Speaker 1: a loving way, taking accountability for that. This is your decision.

1161
00:56:58,760 --> 00:57:01,879
Speaker 1: There's nothing they could have done or do. But if

1162
00:57:01,920 --> 00:57:06,200
Speaker 1: you want to repair this, I think writing an email,

1163
00:57:06,840 --> 00:57:10,520
Speaker 1: preparing like writing a letter and getting it, getting it

1164
00:57:10,600 --> 00:57:13,319
Speaker 1: all out where you won't get interrupted like I did

1165
00:57:13,320 --> 00:57:16,480
Speaker 1: to Andrew when I telled him to answer this for me, um,

1166
00:57:16,520 --> 00:57:18,000
Speaker 1: and he didn't do a good enough job in my mind,

1167
00:57:18,000 --> 00:57:20,520
Speaker 1: so I started, No, that wasn't why at all. Um No,

1168
00:57:20,920 --> 00:57:22,680
Speaker 1: I think you had a good point, but I just saw, like,

1169
00:57:22,920 --> 00:57:24,680
Speaker 1: but I don't want her to have to work it out.

1170
00:57:24,760 --> 00:57:26,640
Speaker 1: Sometimes I'm just like, don't try to work this. That

1171
00:57:26,720 --> 00:57:30,680
Speaker 1: just happened. But that that's I feel like that happens

1172
00:57:30,720 --> 00:57:33,840
Speaker 1: all the time, where then the person doesn't learn. They

1173
00:57:33,880 --> 00:57:36,240
Speaker 1: just go, oh, well, all right, they just didn't want

1174
00:57:36,240 --> 00:57:37,880
Speaker 1: to hang out with me. I guess nothing's really wrong

1175
00:57:37,920 --> 00:57:41,640
Speaker 1: with your job. It's not not your job. But I'm

1176
00:57:41,680 --> 00:57:45,040
Speaker 1: just saying that it happened. The person goes, is it

1177
00:57:45,200 --> 00:57:47,760
Speaker 1: something I did? Then you can say yes, and you

1178
00:57:47,800 --> 00:57:50,920
Speaker 1: can be honest, but wait for them to be curious

1179
00:57:51,000 --> 00:57:53,560
Speaker 1: if it's something they can change, because someone who is

1180
00:57:53,600 --> 00:57:57,560
Speaker 1: like that's you know what intervention although shows about people

1181
00:57:57,840 --> 00:57:59,360
Speaker 1: are saying we are not going to have you in

1182
00:57:59,360 --> 00:58:01,920
Speaker 1: our life anymore. Or if you keep using this drug,

1183
00:58:01,960 --> 00:58:06,560
Speaker 1: if you keep hurting yourself like I'm out, you need

1184
00:58:06,600 --> 00:58:09,120
Speaker 1: to pull your love for people to change because once

1185
00:58:09,200 --> 00:58:11,960
Speaker 1: they're once that tent pole comes out, they are a

1186
00:58:11,960 --> 00:58:14,200
Speaker 1: tarp on the ground and they have to figure out

1187
00:58:14,400 --> 00:58:17,080
Speaker 1: there's some I don't have that support anymore. My point though,

1188
00:58:17,160 --> 00:58:20,840
Speaker 1: is that with an intervention, right, there's something concrete, like

1189
00:58:21,120 --> 00:58:24,640
Speaker 1: you're taking this drug. We know it's the drug. This

1190
00:58:24,760 --> 00:58:26,720
Speaker 1: is it, right? But if it's someone that just talks

1191
00:58:26,720 --> 00:58:30,200
Speaker 1: about themselves and doesn't ask about they probably don't really

1192
00:58:30,200 --> 00:58:34,120
Speaker 1: even they might not even be aware. So maybe a

1193
00:58:34,240 --> 00:58:37,440
Speaker 1: letter just so you can say it all without getting

1194
00:58:37,440 --> 00:58:40,480
Speaker 1: sidetracked by them responding and saying everything you want to

1195
00:58:40,520 --> 00:58:44,120
Speaker 1: say in a very loving way of like, you know,

1196
00:58:44,440 --> 00:58:46,760
Speaker 1: sometimes I go I need a lot more in friendships

1197
00:58:46,800 --> 00:58:49,600
Speaker 1: than maybe most people do, and I require people to

1198
00:58:50,080 --> 00:58:52,120
Speaker 1: be interested in my life, which I have not felt

1199
00:58:52,160 --> 00:58:54,120
Speaker 1: for some reason I haven't felt for maybe you are

1200
00:58:54,160 --> 00:58:56,160
Speaker 1: interested in my life and and I'm not interpreting it

1201
00:58:56,200 --> 00:58:59,240
Speaker 1: that way. But there's something wrong here and it doesn't

1202
00:58:59,280 --> 00:59:00,800
Speaker 1: feel good to hang out with you, and I don't

1203
00:59:00,800 --> 00:59:03,640
Speaker 1: want to fake it with you. And maybe it's all me,

1204
00:59:03,680 --> 00:59:06,680
Speaker 1: maybe have to work on myself. Maybe we aren't just

1205
00:59:06,760 --> 00:59:10,040
Speaker 1: meant to be friends right now. Always lead with like

1206
00:59:10,240 --> 00:59:13,040
Speaker 1: love and not a lot of blame, but stating the

1207
00:59:13,080 --> 00:59:14,760
Speaker 1: facts of like, I feel like you don't care about

1208
00:59:14,800 --> 00:59:16,000
Speaker 1: my life, and I don't want to be friends with

1209
00:59:16,040 --> 00:59:17,960
Speaker 1: people who don't care about my life because for me

1210
00:59:18,480 --> 00:59:21,040
Speaker 1: my friendships, I care about my friend's life. So when

1211
00:59:21,040 --> 00:59:23,320
Speaker 1: you don't care about mine, it's totally fine that you don't,

1212
00:59:23,760 --> 00:59:26,440
Speaker 1: but it means I interpret that as you don't you're

1213
00:59:26,480 --> 00:59:30,520
Speaker 1: not a good friend to me. And so just you know,

1214
00:59:30,600 --> 00:59:36,200
Speaker 1: speaking from you as opposed to speaking from I and

1215
00:59:36,320 --> 00:59:39,840
Speaker 1: not so much you would be helpful. Michelle and I

1216
00:59:39,840 --> 00:59:41,600
Speaker 1: hope it works out. And I know that's so tough,

1217
00:59:41,720 --> 00:59:44,280
Speaker 1: especially if you have friends in common or like places

1218
00:59:44,320 --> 00:59:48,480
Speaker 1: of hanging out in common. You might see them around

1219
00:59:48,520 --> 00:59:51,720
Speaker 1: friends before just over the things that could have been

1220
00:59:52,120 --> 00:59:55,880
Speaker 1: rectified through a conversation. I just said this to Chris

1221
00:59:55,920 --> 00:59:58,280
Speaker 1: so hard, though, But I've seen people change after a

1222
00:59:58,320 --> 01:00:01,920
Speaker 1: conversation where you're like, oh, I just said to Chris

1223
01:00:01,960 --> 01:00:04,280
Speaker 1: the other day, when you when I say something that

1224
01:00:04,440 --> 01:00:07,520
Speaker 1: kind of makes you go I didn't like that. Instead

1225
01:00:07,560 --> 01:00:09,960
Speaker 1: of um, like what I do a lot of times,

1226
01:00:10,000 --> 01:00:14,960
Speaker 1: instead of just going okay, like like that's how I

1227
01:00:15,000 --> 01:00:16,840
Speaker 1: do it, I don't say okay. But like he was like,

1228
01:00:16,920 --> 01:00:18,960
Speaker 1: I don't say okay, And I'm like, whatever that is

1229
01:00:19,000 --> 01:00:20,640
Speaker 1: for you where you hear something and you're just like,

1230
01:00:20,760 --> 01:00:23,000
Speaker 1: I'm just gonna ignore that she said that because it's

1231
01:00:23,000 --> 01:00:26,800
Speaker 1: so upsetting. Will you try your best to just clear

1232
01:00:26,920 --> 01:00:28,640
Speaker 1: up whatever is going through in your head? And he's like, well,

1233
01:00:28,800 --> 01:00:30,440
Speaker 1: sometimes that's I'm just not even aware of it. And

1234
01:00:30,480 --> 01:00:32,360
Speaker 1: I go, well, you know what I can do when

1235
01:00:32,440 --> 01:00:35,240
Speaker 1: I when I feel you may be shutting down, because

1236
01:00:35,240 --> 01:00:36,880
Speaker 1: I can feel it immediately. If I bring up something

1237
01:00:36,920 --> 01:00:38,200
Speaker 1: and I'm like, wait, what did I say wrong? He

1238
01:00:38,680 --> 01:00:43,080
Speaker 1: just dropped the subject. I can then go I'm feeling

1239
01:00:43,120 --> 01:00:44,560
Speaker 1: like you didn't like what I just said. Can I

1240
01:00:44,600 --> 01:00:46,200
Speaker 1: ask you if that rubbed you the wrong way? And what?

1241
01:00:46,440 --> 01:00:50,080
Speaker 1: So we can help each other in real time as

1242
01:00:50,080 --> 01:00:52,600
Speaker 1: opposed to just going they're mad at me and then

1243
01:00:52,600 --> 01:00:55,040
Speaker 1: creating the story about why they're mad and they're so

1244
01:00:55,080 --> 01:00:57,120
Speaker 1: as sensitive and all this stuff, when really it was

1245
01:00:57,160 --> 01:01:00,760
Speaker 1: just like a misunderstanding and honestly trying to avoid a fight,

1246
01:01:00,920 --> 01:01:02,720
Speaker 1: when really when you try to avoid fights, you make

1247
01:01:02,800 --> 01:01:06,080
Speaker 1: such a bigger one down the road. Final thought, I

1248
01:01:08,840 --> 01:01:10,880
Speaker 1: know what you said that this just recently happened to you.

1249
01:01:11,400 --> 01:01:13,640
Speaker 1: I had yeah, very quickly, because you have an interview.

1250
01:01:14,000 --> 01:01:17,880
Speaker 1: A friend broke up with me over email I didn't like.

1251
01:01:18,120 --> 01:01:22,040
Speaker 1: And it wasn't because I did anything wrong except um

1252
01:01:22,120 --> 01:01:30,000
Speaker 1: that I remained my friends your email. It was what

1253
01:01:30,040 --> 01:01:33,880
Speaker 1: was her reasoning. So the reason was, um, she is

1254
01:01:33,920 --> 01:01:36,920
Speaker 1: going through a divorce with another friend that I'm friends with,

1255
01:01:36,960 --> 01:01:40,680
Speaker 1: her husband her next husband, I guess, and uh, I'm

1256
01:01:40,720 --> 01:01:43,320
Speaker 1: still friends with him, and I was still friends with her.

1257
01:01:43,960 --> 01:01:46,160
Speaker 1: But in her message she said, right now in my life,

1258
01:01:46,160 --> 01:01:49,280
Speaker 1: I can't be friends with anyone who supports this person.

1259
01:01:50,400 --> 01:01:53,960
Speaker 1: And you know, I respect her decision. I'm not mad

1260
01:01:54,000 --> 01:01:56,880
Speaker 1: at her. I understand this is a life turning event

1261
01:01:57,000 --> 01:02:00,240
Speaker 1: for her and whatever her brain is telling her is

1262
01:02:00,280 --> 01:02:03,200
Speaker 1: not anything against me. It's just what she has to do.

1263
01:02:03,640 --> 01:02:06,360
Speaker 1: So I think you're right about UM just being honest

1264
01:02:06,400 --> 01:02:08,840
Speaker 1: in an email, and it was it was not emotional.

1265
01:02:08,880 --> 01:02:12,280
Speaker 1: It's just kind of sterile and just very direct, and

1266
01:02:12,320 --> 01:02:15,160
Speaker 1: I'm I'm appreciate, you know, I think it's it was

1267
01:02:15,200 --> 01:02:18,440
Speaker 1: actually very big of her too, beyond me with it,

1268
01:02:18,560 --> 01:02:20,880
Speaker 1: and and to just be honest instead of just kind

1269
01:02:20,880 --> 01:02:23,080
Speaker 1: of ghosting and like not inviting, which is when I

1270
01:02:23,120 --> 01:02:26,120
Speaker 1: was not getting back. Yeah, yeah, interesting, And you know what,

1271
01:02:26,200 --> 01:02:30,080
Speaker 1: that actually leaves space for the future of being like, hey,

1272
01:02:30,160 --> 01:02:33,080
Speaker 1: this thing that I before is no longer the case,

1273
01:02:33,080 --> 01:02:35,080
Speaker 1: like when you get really honest, even though it might

1274
01:02:35,160 --> 01:02:38,320
Speaker 1: hurt to hear, like you can't help your feelings. She

1275
01:02:38,360 --> 01:02:40,600
Speaker 1: can't help that. She is just I can't help that.

1276
01:02:40,680 --> 01:02:42,480
Speaker 1: I did not want to be friends after I found

1277
01:02:42,520 --> 01:02:44,320
Speaker 1: out one of my friends voted for Trump in the

1278
01:02:44,320 --> 01:02:48,040
Speaker 1: two thousand and sixteen election. I was so hurt by it,

1279
01:02:48,720 --> 01:02:52,160
Speaker 1: and she had claimed that she she voted for him

1280
01:02:52,280 --> 01:02:54,760
Speaker 1: because really long time friend that I had, you know,

1281
01:02:54,840 --> 01:02:57,320
Speaker 1: wasn't close with anymore but a high school friend. I

1282
01:02:57,360 --> 01:03:00,880
Speaker 1: was so deeply disturbed that my friend, who I like,

1283
01:03:01,160 --> 01:03:04,840
Speaker 1: who's a woman who has daughters, voted for Trump. I

1284
01:03:04,920 --> 01:03:07,720
Speaker 1: just couldn't. I couldn't do it, and I said I can't,

1285
01:03:07,720 --> 01:03:09,720
Speaker 1: I cannot be friends with you, and all of my

1286
01:03:09,720 --> 01:03:13,040
Speaker 1: other friends were like, really, you're pulling out of this

1287
01:03:13,120 --> 01:03:15,160
Speaker 1: front like our group chat because of this, and I'm like,

1288
01:03:15,320 --> 01:03:17,680
Speaker 1: I'm too angry about it. It honestly has nothing to

1289
01:03:17,720 --> 01:03:20,080
Speaker 1: do with her. It has to do with me and

1290
01:03:20,160 --> 01:03:23,040
Speaker 1: figuring out why I can't get over how someone has

1291
01:03:23,080 --> 01:03:25,520
Speaker 1: a different opinion about something to me. But to me,

1292
01:03:26,160 --> 01:03:30,120
Speaker 1: that was like being friends with my ex husband and

1293
01:03:30,160 --> 01:03:33,160
Speaker 1: picking this side that I think is nothing but pure

1294
01:03:33,200 --> 01:03:36,280
Speaker 1: evil based on how emotionally invested I am in this

1295
01:03:36,440 --> 01:03:40,080
Speaker 1: thing going on. If you choose his side, I can't.

1296
01:03:40,480 --> 01:03:44,680
Speaker 1: And I am just now reconnecting. I mean, we always

1297
01:03:44,680 --> 01:03:46,520
Speaker 1: stayed friends. I would always write on her birthday. We'd

1298
01:03:46,560 --> 01:03:48,880
Speaker 1: write each other like little inside jokes. But the day

1299
01:03:48,880 --> 01:03:51,000
Speaker 1: to day stuff that we used to be doing it

1300
01:03:51,000 --> 01:03:55,480
Speaker 1: it disappeared, and I there's a I was like, I

1301
01:03:55,600 --> 01:03:58,440
Speaker 1: was just in a bad place, and there's in some

1302
01:03:58,480 --> 01:04:00,280
Speaker 1: ways I stand by it. Some ways, I'm still sucking

1303
01:04:00,320 --> 01:04:02,680
Speaker 1: angry about it because I just don't understand how her

1304
01:04:02,720 --> 01:04:05,720
Speaker 1: logic would be. Every man in my life voted for Trump.

1305
01:04:05,760 --> 01:04:07,480
Speaker 1: How am I not going to do that? To me,

1306
01:04:07,560 --> 01:04:09,840
Speaker 1: that was like, um, because you have a brain of

1307
01:04:09,880 --> 01:04:11,640
Speaker 1: your own, and when you get in the voting booth,

1308
01:04:11,680 --> 01:04:13,919
Speaker 1: your husband's not monitoring. You just tell them you voted

1309
01:04:13,960 --> 01:04:16,680
Speaker 1: for Trump and then don't do It's like, do what's

1310
01:04:16,800 --> 01:04:19,800
Speaker 1: right for your daughter inside the booth, bitch. But maybe

1311
01:04:19,800 --> 01:04:22,520
Speaker 1: what's right for her daughter is having lower taxes or

1312
01:04:22,560 --> 01:04:25,960
Speaker 1: whatever her husband had convinced her was better than you know,

1313
01:04:26,360 --> 01:04:30,160
Speaker 1: protecting your right to an abortion, a safe abortion, whatever

1314
01:04:30,320 --> 01:04:32,280
Speaker 1: in you know, for me, were the issues in two

1315
01:04:32,280 --> 01:04:34,560
Speaker 1: thousand sixteen that were on the line and voting for him.

1316
01:04:34,920 --> 01:04:37,160
Speaker 1: And I don't know the whole story and I don't

1317
01:04:37,160 --> 01:04:40,840
Speaker 1: know her experience. But we've just started talking again and

1318
01:04:41,680 --> 01:04:45,880
Speaker 1: I don't talk about politics obviously, that's just we don't

1319
01:04:45,880 --> 01:04:50,800
Speaker 1: talk about Bruno. And it's still hard for me though.

1320
01:04:50,840 --> 01:04:52,720
Speaker 1: It's still there's a part of me that really is

1321
01:04:52,760 --> 01:04:57,600
Speaker 1: like so angry and feels betrayed, and um, yeah, it's

1322
01:04:57,680 --> 01:05:00,640
Speaker 1: like but you know, I've had friends take breaks from

1323
01:05:00,680 --> 01:05:03,240
Speaker 1: me too for whatever reason, and I feel like so

1324
01:05:03,880 --> 01:05:05,959
Speaker 1: angry because I'm like, she doesn't understand, like I wasn't

1325
01:05:06,000 --> 01:05:08,160
Speaker 1: doing that because just like my friend was like, I

1326
01:05:08,160 --> 01:05:10,600
Speaker 1: didn't do it because I don't care about abortion rights.

1327
01:05:10,600 --> 01:05:11,840
Speaker 1: That did because I just want to get along with

1328
01:05:11,880 --> 01:05:14,760
Speaker 1: the men and my family, which I don't understand. I

1329
01:05:14,760 --> 01:05:18,320
Speaker 1: don't my my the men and my family. My their

1330
01:05:18,360 --> 01:05:21,120
Speaker 1: love isn't contingent on me voting the way they vote.

1331
01:05:21,520 --> 01:05:23,800
Speaker 1: But what I don't know what it's like to be

1332
01:05:23,800 --> 01:05:26,880
Speaker 1: in a family like that. So it was a struggle.

1333
01:05:27,040 --> 01:05:31,280
Speaker 1: But I like people asking for advice. I hope that

1334
01:05:31,320 --> 01:05:34,680
Speaker 1: it helped her and that I don't know, I hope

1335
01:05:34,720 --> 01:05:37,200
Speaker 1: that people get stuff out of it, you know, like

1336
01:05:38,080 --> 01:05:40,080
Speaker 1: it would be funny if she was just like five

1337
01:05:40,160 --> 01:05:42,240
Speaker 1: years later, they're like, no, I'm still going through it.

1338
01:05:42,240 --> 01:05:44,520
Speaker 1: I'm still best friends with this girl who hasn't asked

1339
01:05:44,520 --> 01:05:47,960
Speaker 1: me one question. I gotta say, Michelle, every fucking person

1340
01:05:48,040 --> 01:05:50,000
Speaker 1: I know has one person like for one or two

1341
01:05:50,040 --> 01:05:51,560
Speaker 1: people like this in their life that they are just

1342
01:05:51,680 --> 01:05:55,240
Speaker 1: friends with out of just being nice and going with

1343
01:05:55,280 --> 01:05:58,480
Speaker 1: what they did before following doing what your family does. Oh,

1344
01:05:58,480 --> 01:06:00,640
Speaker 1: they're friends with my family. Oh there, my, they are

1345
01:06:00,760 --> 01:06:02,520
Speaker 1: my family. I gotta just put up with it, like

1346
01:06:02,960 --> 01:06:05,800
Speaker 1: you don't. And people only get better if you set

1347
01:06:05,840 --> 01:06:09,040
Speaker 1: boundaries for yourself. They learn how to have boundaries for themselves,

1348
01:06:09,120 --> 01:06:13,120
Speaker 1: and they learn they learned that their actions have consequences

1349
01:06:13,160 --> 01:06:15,680
Speaker 1: as opposed to like, you're not doing anyone any favors

1350
01:06:15,720 --> 01:06:18,440
Speaker 1: by faking like putting up with them unless they're your boss,

1351
01:06:18,480 --> 01:06:20,560
Speaker 1: and like, you know, you're just trying to get a

1352
01:06:20,560 --> 01:06:28,880
Speaker 1: page jug right, Andrew better agree with me? All right, Okay,

1353
01:06:28,920 --> 01:06:32,000
Speaker 1: here we go. Oh yeah, rap. You know, sometimes I

1354
01:06:32,080 --> 01:06:35,280
Speaker 1: feel like a hedgehog. I'm running through to smug. All

1355
01:06:35,320 --> 01:06:37,360
Speaker 1: I want to do is jump like a frog, but

1356
01:06:37,400 --> 01:06:39,800
Speaker 1: I get held down by this fucking girl ohover here,

1357
01:06:39,840 --> 01:06:42,680
Speaker 1: which ships like a log. But dude, I'm just working around.

1358
01:06:42,680 --> 01:06:46,200
Speaker 1: It's just a song. Uh. And sometimes I feel like

1359
01:06:46,200 --> 01:06:48,480
Speaker 1: a llama, you know. I get mad at your mama.

1360
01:06:48,760 --> 01:06:50,840
Speaker 1: And sometimes I want to vote for Obama, but he's

1361
01:06:50,840 --> 01:06:52,960
Speaker 1: not on the tickets, so you gotta just hit it.

1362
01:06:53,320 --> 01:06:55,400
Speaker 1: And then a friend votes for Trump and you might

1363
01:06:55,440 --> 01:06:57,760
Speaker 1: have to quit it. But the point of this all

1364
01:06:57,840 --> 01:06:59,680
Speaker 1: is that Quidditch is a game that was in Harry

1365
01:06:59,720 --> 01:07:01,560
Speaker 1: Potter her and I know that sounds lame, but I

1366
01:07:01,600 --> 01:07:04,360
Speaker 1: gotta go because I gotta get on a call. I'm

1367
01:07:04,400 --> 01:07:06,080
Speaker 1: talking about a dance that I don't want to do

1368
01:07:06,120 --> 01:07:08,840
Speaker 1: it all am. I gonna bomb it, probably, but let's

1369
01:07:08,880 --> 01:07:12,919
Speaker 1: just see on NBC two thousand three. Al Right, guys,

1370
01:07:12,960 --> 01:07:15,720
Speaker 1: don't we have a great weekend. We'll see you on

1371
01:07:15,720 --> 01:07:20,840
Speaker 1: the Pod on Monday and Joke Jackie the Joke Man,

1372
01:07:21,720 --> 01:07:25,560
Speaker 1: marlen Stern, Baba Booie hit U with behind by Guys

1373
01:07:25,920 --> 01:07:26,520
Speaker 1: Beetle Juice