WEBVTT - Conversations with A Brain Surgeon With Dr. Lee Warren - Part 4: Neuro-habits 0:00:00.400 --> 0:00:04.400 I won't let my body. I'll be out wait everything 0:00:04.440 --> 0:00:08.039 that I'm made done. Won't spend my life trying to change. 0:00:08.640 --> 0:00:12.879 I'm learning love who I am again. I'm strong, I 0:00:13.000 --> 0:00:17.560 feel free, I know every part of me. It's beautiful 0:00:19.440 --> 0:00:24.400 and then will always out way if you feel it 0:00:24.480 --> 0:00:27.159 with your hands and be here, She'll some love to 0:00:27.280 --> 0:00:30.240 the boy you have there. Say go one day Ana, 0:00:30.920 --> 0:00:34.680 did you and die out way? 0:00:35.240 --> 0:00:36.720 Happy Saturday, out Weigh. 0:00:36.800 --> 0:00:39.680 We are back for our fourth and final episode of 0:00:39.720 --> 0:00:43.120 this neuro series. We are back with doctor Lee Warren. Hello, 0:00:43.320 --> 0:00:44.680 Doctor Warren, Welcome back. 0:00:45.159 --> 0:00:46.599 Thanks Leanne. Good to be back with you. 0:00:46.920 --> 0:00:49.519 If you missed the last three weeks, definitely check it out. 0:00:49.600 --> 0:00:52.280 Three weeks ago we talked about neuro thoughts, then we 0:00:52.320 --> 0:00:55.600 went through neuro feelings. Last week with neuro beliefs, and 0:00:55.680 --> 0:00:58.279 this week we are going to get into neuro habits 0:00:58.280 --> 0:01:01.240 and action and doing and the get off your butt 0:01:01.280 --> 0:01:03.160 and do side of things, which is what people think 0:01:03.360 --> 0:01:06.280 is the first thing, but I specifically put it last. 0:01:06.480 --> 0:01:09.840 So that being said, when it comes to this kind 0:01:09.880 --> 0:01:12.840 of trickle down effect or this cause and effect chicken egg, 0:01:12.880 --> 0:01:14.560 of what we talked about, the thoughts, the feelings, the 0:01:14.600 --> 0:01:18.200 beliefs and really believing your way into becoming the next 0:01:18.319 --> 0:01:21.280 version of yourself and starting at your thoughts. What would 0:01:21.319 --> 0:01:23.520 you say to you to really kick us off when 0:01:23.560 --> 0:01:26.800 it comes to how our brains decide what we're doing, 0:01:26.880 --> 0:01:29.520 the action, the habit side of things. Can you first 0:01:29.560 --> 0:01:31.440 and foremost kind of give us a thirty thousand foot 0:01:31.480 --> 0:01:34.479 overview of what actually happens in connect the dots from 0:01:34.480 --> 0:01:35.560 the last few weeks. 0:01:35.880 --> 0:01:38.080 One of the things we talked about in the first episode, 0:01:38.160 --> 0:01:41.000 I believe was this idea that sometimes we get stuck 0:01:41.040 --> 0:01:44.440 in thought loops. Something happens and we start thinking about it, 0:01:44.520 --> 0:01:46.240 and then we can't quit thinking about it, and then 0:01:46.520 --> 0:01:48.960 pretty soon all we're doing is thinking about everything, and 0:01:49.000 --> 0:01:51.360 we can't get out of our heads. And that's when 0:01:51.360 --> 0:01:55.120 we have to have somebody, a wise professor or a friend, 0:01:55.160 --> 0:01:58.280 a counselor somebody come alongside. Hey, it's time to stop 0:01:58.320 --> 0:02:01.040 contemplating and start operating. You got to get out of 0:02:01.080 --> 0:02:02.920 your head and start doing stuff. And then one of 0:02:02.960 --> 0:02:05.440 the things we know from neuroscience too, is that it's 0:02:05.520 --> 0:02:07.640 not just that you've got to somehow some of the 0:02:07.680 --> 0:02:10.720 courage to start moving, but you can also anticipate that 0:02:10.840 --> 0:02:14.120 movement and action actually feeds back and makes things better 0:02:14.160 --> 0:02:16.880 for you too. You get this brain derived neurotropic factor 0:02:16.919 --> 0:02:20.760 and need all these neurotransmitters that boost more effectively with 0:02:20.880 --> 0:02:24.680 movement and physical activity than they do with medication. So 0:02:25.160 --> 0:02:27.520 taking action is actually a compassion and a good thing 0:02:27.560 --> 0:02:30.560 you can do for yourself too, even when it seems hard. 0:02:30.840 --> 0:02:32.520 So I think the first thing is just to say 0:02:32.840 --> 0:02:36.799 that there's a process in your brain of anticipating something 0:02:36.840 --> 0:02:39.519 that you need or want to do and then thinking 0:02:39.560 --> 0:02:42.040 about all the variables involved in that, and then the 0:02:42.080 --> 0:02:44.160 feelings get involved, and you know, the last time I 0:02:44.160 --> 0:02:46.480 did this, last time I put myself out there, this happened, 0:02:46.520 --> 0:02:48.880 And then you can cock yourself out of taking that action, 0:02:49.280 --> 0:02:51.399 and then you feel bad that you didn't do the thing, 0:02:51.440 --> 0:02:53.600 and then you can start getting into that rumbination loop 0:02:53.960 --> 0:02:55.960 of not having done it, and you get stuck. Right. 0:02:56.280 --> 0:02:58.800 And so sometimes especially if we've been through something hard, 0:02:59.320 --> 0:03:01.519 or if we have a shame situation with of a 0:03:01.639 --> 0:03:03.919 habit or a pattern that we are using as a 0:03:04.000 --> 0:03:07.240 numbing behavior to avoid feeling or dealing with something else, 0:03:07.480 --> 0:03:10.079 then we can find ourselves really stuck and we don't 0:03:10.120 --> 0:03:11.960 have to be stuck, like the hoarder in our house 0:03:12.000 --> 0:03:14.400 that hasn't left, you know, been inside for twenty years. 0:03:14.560 --> 0:03:17.519 But we can get stuck in inactivity or inaction in 0:03:17.639 --> 0:03:20.280 various areas of our life where we have certain things 0:03:20.280 --> 0:03:22.680 that we just aren't doing that we need to be doing, 0:03:22.960 --> 0:03:26.480 stewarding relationships, you know, advancing on our professions, or whatever 0:03:26.520 --> 0:03:28.639 it is that we need to be doing, and then 0:03:28.720 --> 0:03:31.799 that starts becoming its own burden of this weight of 0:03:31.960 --> 0:03:36.120 not having done something. So there's this risk reward thing 0:03:36.240 --> 0:03:39.320 that I want people to recognize that sometimes it's sort 0:03:39.360 --> 0:03:43.480 of scary to take action, to finally jump and make 0:03:43.480 --> 0:03:46.040 the leap and do that thing. But it's not as 0:03:46.120 --> 0:03:48.800 scary is if you look at the long failure of 0:03:48.880 --> 0:03:51.800 staying put. So like, if you keep doing what you've 0:03:51.800 --> 0:03:53.920 been doing, you're going to get better at doing what 0:03:53.960 --> 0:03:58.920 you've been doing. And if what you've been doing is nothing, stuck, ruminating, 0:03:59.600 --> 0:04:02.400 deprive yourself of life, then you're going to get better 0:04:02.480 --> 0:04:04.640 at doing that. You're going to start making this synaptic 0:04:04.800 --> 0:04:06.920 like we talked about in the Feeling and then and 0:04:06.960 --> 0:04:10.720 then the Belief episode about synaptic c wagon trail that 0:04:10.760 --> 0:04:13.160 you get stuck in these ruts. So the longer you 0:04:13.320 --> 0:04:18.840 delay starting the action part of your thought feeling action loop, 0:04:19.360 --> 0:04:21.200 the harder it's going to be to make that happen. 0:04:21.240 --> 0:04:23.039 So sometimes you got to rip the band aid off 0:04:23.360 --> 0:04:24.400 and just get after it. 0:04:24.880 --> 0:04:27.039 So good, And I'd love to kind of dive into 0:04:27.080 --> 0:04:29.799 the whole lessons more concept as well, because I remember 0:04:29.880 --> 0:04:31.880 back in I think it's twenty ten, when I started 0:04:31.960 --> 0:04:34.800 learning about the physiological nervous system just trying to heal 0:04:34.880 --> 0:04:37.240 my own stuff. One of the things I heard was 0:04:37.240 --> 0:04:39.680 that not all movement is good movement, because you if 0:04:39.680 --> 0:04:42.240 you're in pain, like taking the nervous system through a 0:04:42.240 --> 0:04:44.799 painful repetition, is you want to go for a pain 0:04:44.920 --> 0:04:48.640 free repetition. And I started diving into this idea of 0:04:48.680 --> 0:04:51.680 the nervous system kind of being a less is more, smarter, 0:04:51.880 --> 0:04:55.760 not harder system and training it to success, not to failure, 0:04:55.920 --> 0:04:58.560 and versus the muscular skeleton system, which you know a 0:04:58.560 --> 0:05:00.680 lot of people look at is like this harder, faster, more, 0:05:00.920 --> 0:05:02.680 you know, no pain, no gain kind of thing. 0:05:03.040 --> 0:05:04.720 So can you talk to us a little bit. 0:05:04.640 --> 0:05:07.719 About for a beginner that doesn't have the momentum is 0:05:07.760 --> 0:05:10.160 in that ripping off the band aid phase. Can you 0:05:10.200 --> 0:05:12.760 talk to us about the beauty of how the brain learns? 0:05:13.320 --> 0:05:16.000 Yeah, I think you know. There's a lot of neuroscience 0:05:16.040 --> 0:05:19.920 around the idea of your anti mid singulate gyrus. For example, 0:05:19.960 --> 0:05:24.400 that learning to make yourself take a step in something 0:05:24.440 --> 0:05:28.400 that's uncomfortable or hard actually turns out to have tremendous 0:05:28.440 --> 0:05:34.120 benefit in improving willpower and increasing resilience in all areas 0:05:34.120 --> 0:05:36.080 of your life. So if you learn how to just 0:05:36.120 --> 0:05:39.640 sort of do one hard thing, like make that phone 0:05:39.680 --> 0:05:42.120 call that you've been avoiding, make that apology, say thank 0:05:42.160 --> 0:05:44.560 you for something that you've been avoiding, or finding a 0:05:44.600 --> 0:05:47.520 way to send somebody a note or whatever, it might 0:05:47.560 --> 0:05:50.520 be just a little thing, that little step might be 0:05:50.720 --> 0:05:53.480 enough that the next time you're faced with a different 0:05:53.560 --> 0:05:57.880 hard thing, the inertia involved in doing that is actually lower, 0:05:58.160 --> 0:06:00.960 and you find yourself, hey, I'm actually becoming a person 0:06:00.960 --> 0:06:02.839 who can do stuff when I say I need to 0:06:02.880 --> 0:06:06.839 do it, and so little. Your nervous system is incredibly efficient, 0:06:07.000 --> 0:06:09.080 and when you teach it a lesson in one area, 0:06:09.480 --> 0:06:12.200 it applies that lesson in multiple areas, so you can 0:06:12.279 --> 0:06:16.680 create that kind of synaptic fluidity and you're reduced inertia 0:06:17.160 --> 0:06:20.719 in other areas by doing things in one area that 0:06:20.800 --> 0:06:22.240 seem a little bit uncomfortable. 0:06:22.520 --> 0:06:25.760 Yeah, So it's almost like your willpower, your discipline can expand, 0:06:25.760 --> 0:06:28.080 but you've got to give it that stimulus. 0:06:28.200 --> 0:06:28.720 What's right. 0:06:28.839 --> 0:06:30.560 So one of the things I talk about with my 0:06:30.600 --> 0:06:33.520 clients is this idea of if you absolutely hate something 0:06:33.600 --> 0:06:36.520 and you have all these negative neuro associations alongside doing 0:06:36.560 --> 0:06:38.880 the thing, the chances of you continuing to do the 0:06:38.920 --> 0:06:41.440 thing aren't going to be very good, right, And it's 0:06:41.480 --> 0:06:44.440 about who you're being while you're doing. The doing is 0:06:44.440 --> 0:06:46.440 also just as important, because the truth is is if 0:06:46.480 --> 0:06:48.240 you hate it, you're not going to sustain it, right. 0:06:48.520 --> 0:06:50.320 So can you speak to us a little bit about that, 0:06:50.360 --> 0:06:52.919 because a lot of people that are listening, they're coming from, 0:06:53.080 --> 0:06:55.520 you know, doing plans and programs that they absolutely hate, 0:06:55.560 --> 0:06:58.400 or it forces them to obsess or control or micromanage 0:06:58.520 --> 0:07:01.240 or think about things or just do things that they 0:07:01.279 --> 0:07:04.320 absolutely hate, and it becomes a conversation of force, persuasion, 0:07:04.360 --> 0:07:07.800 coercion versus feeling like they're choosing it, feeling like they're 0:07:07.800 --> 0:07:10.000 moving in the direction of something that they enjoy or 0:07:10.000 --> 0:07:12.000 that they could see themselves doing. 0:07:12.040 --> 0:07:12.720 In the long haul. 0:07:13.000 --> 0:07:14.960 So can you help just kind of speak into that 0:07:15.040 --> 0:07:16.240 piece of the puzzle as well. 0:07:16.560 --> 0:07:19.960 Yeah, So I think one thing is to identify why 0:07:20.080 --> 0:07:23.400 you hate something, like to figure out what the story 0:07:23.560 --> 0:07:26.400 is that's happening. And that's not to say that if 0:07:26.400 --> 0:07:29.120 there's something that you really just loathe, you need to 0:07:29.160 --> 0:07:31.360 first ask yourself, do I have to do that thing? 0:07:31.880 --> 0:07:33.920 Am I putting myself in a position of having to 0:07:33.960 --> 0:07:36.280 do something that I could change my life in some 0:07:36.320 --> 0:07:38.600 way and not have to do that thing? Not to 0:07:38.680 --> 0:07:42.720 avoid something uncomfortable, But maybe sometimes some questioning and understanding 0:07:42.760 --> 0:07:45.920 the situation might be helpful. But oftentimes what you're getting 0:07:45.960 --> 0:07:47.960 at is that there's something that we really do need 0:07:48.000 --> 0:07:50.720 to do, we need to exercise, we need to repair 0:07:50.800 --> 0:07:53.520 this relationship, we need to balance our budget or whatever, 0:07:53.680 --> 0:07:56.640 and we hate it. Then maybe the question comes down 0:07:56.720 --> 0:07:58.920 to what we talked about, I think in episode two 0:07:59.040 --> 0:08:03.040 about this tension density and quantum Zeno effect idea of 0:08:03.160 --> 0:08:06.200 what you pay attention to and the way in which 0:08:06.200 --> 0:08:09.520 you pay attention to it determines how it comes true 0:08:09.640 --> 0:08:11.640 or doesn't come true in your life. So that means 0:08:11.680 --> 0:08:15.680 that sometimes the idea is can I shift my perspective 0:08:15.880 --> 0:08:18.640 somehow on this thing, and can I find a better 0:08:18.720 --> 0:08:21.040 story to tell myself that would make me not actually 0:08:21.160 --> 0:08:23.960 hate it, but to find some value in accomplishing it 0:08:24.080 --> 0:08:26.920 or doing it well. Right. I always say perception, I 0:08:27.040 --> 0:08:31.280 mobilizes in perception and power. So if you have this perspective, 0:08:31.280 --> 0:08:34.120 empowers perception to mobilize. This perspective empower. So if you 0:08:34.160 --> 0:08:36.559 have this idea that, oh, I hate this, My perception 0:08:36.640 --> 0:08:39.880 of this is always miserable. I hate it, It's just horrible, 0:08:40.320 --> 0:08:42.120 then what's going to happen is that's going to become 0:08:42.120 --> 0:08:43.960 true in your life that when you finally have to 0:08:44.000 --> 0:08:46.360 do the thing, it is terrible, and you prove to 0:08:46.400 --> 0:08:49.400 yourself that you were right because you focus your attention 0:08:49.520 --> 0:08:51.720 in a particular way on that thing and you wired 0:08:51.760 --> 0:08:53.439 that into your brain, that that's always going to be 0:08:53.440 --> 0:08:56.960 an uncomfortable and miserable experience. But if you shift your 0:08:57.000 --> 0:09:00.320 perspective and say, wait, what if I could a coomplish 0:09:00.400 --> 0:09:03.040 this in a way that benefited somebody else, or that 0:09:03.080 --> 0:09:05.000 I could find some way to be grateful about the 0:09:05.040 --> 0:09:07.400 outcome of this, even if I don't like the process 0:09:07.800 --> 0:09:09.960 that takes me through to get to it. If I 0:09:10.000 --> 0:09:12.760 can change that perspective, then I can look at it 0:09:12.800 --> 0:09:14.760 from a different way. And all of a sudden, I'm 0:09:14.840 --> 0:09:17.560 using different parts of my brain, I'm wiring different things in, 0:09:18.000 --> 0:09:20.760 I'm paying attention to the problem in another way, and 0:09:20.800 --> 0:09:23.080 I'm finding, hey, wait a minute, you know that wasn't 0:09:23.120 --> 0:09:25.240 so bad and I kind of enjoyed it. Then they 0:09:25.240 --> 0:09:27.080 were grateful when I did it, and they said thank you, 0:09:27.120 --> 0:09:29.840 and now made a new relationship, or I've repaired something, 0:09:30.000 --> 0:09:33.000 And so maybe the issue is not that you should 0:09:33.000 --> 0:09:35.480 just suffer through things and improve to yourself. That that 0:09:35.559 --> 0:09:38.520 really wasn't miserable, but I'm at least glad it's over. 0:09:39.040 --> 0:09:41.560 Maybe rather find a way to say, you know what, 0:09:42.280 --> 0:09:45.200 I learned something about myself that I can do hard things, 0:09:45.400 --> 0:09:47.040 and that when I do them, they turn out not 0:09:47.120 --> 0:09:49.120 to have been so hard in the first place. And 0:09:49.160 --> 0:09:52.160 then maybe I actually sort of enjoyed that. Maybe you 0:09:52.200 --> 0:09:54.720 can just change perspective and that might be the answer. 0:09:55.120 --> 0:09:57.320 It just so trickles into everything that we've talked about. 0:09:57.360 --> 0:09:59.040 You know, a lot of times it's not the thing itself. 0:09:59.080 --> 0:10:01.720 It's like the story te is the problem, so to speak, 0:10:01.760 --> 0:10:04.040 the story that we're telling, And again, coming back to 0:10:04.080 --> 0:10:05.359 what you're saying, feelings. 0:10:04.960 --> 0:10:05.800 Are not facts. 0:10:05.840 --> 0:10:09.000 You know, how we feel about something might be painting 0:10:09.000 --> 0:10:11.640 the picture in a way. And then also just being 0:10:11.640 --> 0:10:14.000 aware of when we're using those always never kind of 0:10:14.000 --> 0:10:16.160 statements or like I hate doing this or I'll never 0:10:16.200 --> 0:10:18.520 be good at that. It's such a good thought process 0:10:18.559 --> 0:10:20.560 because a lot of people get stuck in the rut 0:10:20.600 --> 0:10:22.840 of thinking that the thing is the problem, right, But 0:10:22.920 --> 0:10:25.160 oftentimes you're right, it is our perspective. 0:10:30.360 --> 0:10:32.920 So the question that I feel, I'm guessing you've been 0:10:32.960 --> 0:10:34.280 asked this a thousand times. 0:10:34.600 --> 0:10:36.560 I feel like if you ask ten different people, they'll 0:10:36.559 --> 0:10:38.520 give you ten different answers about you know, it takes 0:10:38.559 --> 0:10:40.400 twenty one days to start a new habit, it takes 0:10:40.400 --> 0:10:43.120 thirty days to start a habit. Obviously, the attention density, 0:10:43.160 --> 0:10:45.240 the fire and wired heads law that we talked about, 0:10:45.280 --> 0:10:47.640 there's all those different things that come into play. But 0:10:47.720 --> 0:10:50.240 what would you say to somebody who's like, Okay, I'm 0:10:50.320 --> 0:10:52.439 drawing a lie in the sand. There's this whole new 0:10:52.440 --> 0:10:54.960 way of thinking and being and feeling and beliefs that 0:10:55.000 --> 0:10:57.840 I want to step into. In terms of it becoming 0:10:58.000 --> 0:11:01.160 my new way of being and my new brain what 0:11:01.240 --> 0:11:03.720 does that look like on a timeline level, on an 0:11:03.800 --> 0:11:06.520 intensity level, on a density level. 0:11:06.800 --> 0:11:08.880 From your perspective, Well. 0:11:08.720 --> 0:11:10.959 I think it's different for everybody, and I think it's 0:11:10.960 --> 0:11:14.000 different in every situation for everybody too, because there's some 0:11:15.160 --> 0:11:17.800 habits that need to be broken and new ones to 0:11:17.880 --> 0:11:21.440 be replace. The length and depth to which you will 0:11:21.440 --> 0:11:23.400 have to go to break those depends on a number 0:11:23.440 --> 0:11:25.839 of things. Some of them are just how long you've 0:11:25.880 --> 0:11:28.199 been doing it that way, right, Like if you've been 0:11:28.520 --> 0:11:30.360 using a pair of scissors in a certain way with 0:11:30.400 --> 0:11:31.959 your right hand your whole life, and all of a 0:11:31.960 --> 0:11:33.680 sudden somebody says, oh, you have to use those with 0:11:33.720 --> 0:11:35.560 your left hand. Now, it's going to take you a 0:11:35.559 --> 0:11:37.800 long time to figure out how to do that job 0:11:37.840 --> 0:11:40.080 with your left hand because you're not left handed. There's 0:11:40.080 --> 0:11:42.960 some physiology involved in that. You haven't ever done it 0:11:43.000 --> 0:11:45.800 that way, so there's some novelty involved in that, and 0:11:45.880 --> 0:11:48.480 it's awkward because the scissors are right handed scissors and 0:11:48.520 --> 0:11:49.840 you're trying to use them with the wrong way. So 0:11:49.840 --> 0:11:52.640 there's some mechanics and logistics involved in that. Right. So 0:11:52.679 --> 0:11:54.560 there's a lot of different things that come into play 0:11:54.600 --> 0:11:57.360 when you talk about breaking a habit or changing a habit. 0:11:57.800 --> 0:12:00.480 Another level of it, though, is that some things breaking 0:12:00.480 --> 0:12:03.960 a habit related to certain medications or substances. There's also 0:12:04.080 --> 0:12:08.840 a physiological and psychological involvement and an addiction component to that, 0:12:08.920 --> 0:12:11.560 and so the answer is different depending on what the 0:12:11.600 --> 0:12:14.560 situation is. But the truth of it is this that 0:12:14.800 --> 0:12:18.360 what you're doing, you're getting better at. And the way 0:12:18.440 --> 0:12:20.880 to get better at something is to tell yourself, I 0:12:20.920 --> 0:12:23.040 don't have to do it all today. In fact, they 0:12:23.080 --> 0:12:26.520 talk about this in the addiction Recovery lingo a lot. 0:12:26.559 --> 0:12:28.440 It's like, you don't have to quit drinking for the 0:12:28.440 --> 0:12:30.600 rest of your life. You just have to decide I'm 0:12:30.600 --> 0:12:33.040 not going to drink for the next hour. You just 0:12:33.080 --> 0:12:35.080 have to decide, Okay, I'm not sure when the next 0:12:35.080 --> 0:12:36.520 time I take a drink is, but it's not going 0:12:36.520 --> 0:12:39.320 to be to day, right, So make a habit that 0:12:39.360 --> 0:12:41.800 will get you through. If it's a day and you 0:12:41.840 --> 0:12:44.080 can do that, do that, If it's an hour and 0:12:44.120 --> 0:12:46.840 you can do that, do that. But get better at 0:12:46.960 --> 0:12:50.480 being better at doing something for the specified period of time, right. 0:12:50.840 --> 0:12:52.760 And then what you'll find is that as you start 0:12:52.800 --> 0:12:55.480 to incorporate that sort of will and that sort of 0:12:56.080 --> 0:12:59.560 sort of carefully stewarded thought and effort and drive into 0:12:59.600 --> 0:13:03.600 the process. You'll find that the process itself becomes easier 0:13:03.640 --> 0:13:06.880 to attack and more successful in short increments. And so 0:13:06.960 --> 0:13:10.760 I think habits that don't require physiological addictions to be 0:13:10.800 --> 0:13:13.720 broken are probably quicker. That's probably where that twenty one 0:13:13.800 --> 0:13:16.120 day thing comes in. That people say it's actually probably 0:13:16.120 --> 0:13:18.079 more like thirty days for a lot of hard things. 0:13:18.520 --> 0:13:21.400 But I think when you're talking about something that changes 0:13:21.440 --> 0:13:26.000 your physiology like substances, or changes your psychology significantly, like 0:13:26.000 --> 0:13:28.680 pornography or something like that, it may take a very 0:13:28.720 --> 0:13:31.600 long time, but it won't take you long to master 0:13:31.760 --> 0:13:34.240 the art of doing it in short bursts and being 0:13:34.280 --> 0:13:37.000 proud of yourself, giving yourself that dopamine reward of having 0:13:37.080 --> 0:13:39.600 accomplished that thing for a short period of time. And 0:13:39.640 --> 0:13:41.959 you know, for me, it might be I don't wake 0:13:42.040 --> 0:13:44.000 up tomorrow with cheto dust all over my fingers. I 0:13:44.040 --> 0:13:46.440 did it for tonight. I don't have to worry about tomorrow. 0:13:46.640 --> 0:13:48.680 Each day has enough trouble of its own, but I 0:13:48.679 --> 0:13:49.640 can do it for today. 0:13:50.200 --> 0:13:52.960 And I mean, even just stacking on everything that you've 0:13:53.000 --> 0:13:56.079 just said is in alignment with making sure that you're 0:13:56.080 --> 0:13:58.920 addressing the thoughts, the feelings, the beliefs, the habits. 0:13:58.920 --> 0:14:01.200 It's not just the thing itself, Like the thing is 0:14:01.240 --> 0:14:02.240 never the thing, you know. 0:14:02.360 --> 0:14:05.360 So before we kind of end this, bring us home, 0:14:05.440 --> 0:14:07.320 bring us full circle. So if you were to just 0:14:07.440 --> 0:14:10.439 kind of paint a picture of how our thoughts, our feelings, 0:14:10.440 --> 0:14:13.920 and our beliefs all coexist, all chicken egg each other 0:14:13.960 --> 0:14:16.720 which is a technical term of course, and the cause 0:14:16.720 --> 0:14:18.760 and effect of all of them, could you just kind 0:14:18.760 --> 0:14:21.320 of speak into that, just because I really, I really 0:14:21.360 --> 0:14:23.720 want people to get that whatever they're struggling with is 0:14:23.760 --> 0:14:26.000 not about the food, and it's not about their body. 0:14:26.040 --> 0:14:28.480 It is what's going on in their brain, their thoughts, 0:14:28.560 --> 0:14:31.560 their beliefs, their behaviors. It's not any one thing. It's 0:14:31.600 --> 0:14:34.240 all of it. It is a three dimensional thing. But 0:14:34.320 --> 0:14:37.880 that's a beautiful opportunity and possibility, you know, and there's 0:14:37.880 --> 0:14:39.880 a lot of hope that lives in that. So can 0:14:39.920 --> 0:14:41.600 you just kind of speak it to all of that 0:14:41.640 --> 0:14:42.480 three dimensionally? 0:14:43.120 --> 0:14:46.200 Absolutely, And it might even be more than three dimensions, 0:14:46.240 --> 0:14:48.680 you know, so you a fourth dimension involved in it. 0:14:48.800 --> 0:14:49.000 Yeah. 0:14:49.000 --> 0:14:52.520 But the thing is, so you're not a collection of 0:14:52.560 --> 0:14:55.960 your failures and you are not a collection of the 0:14:56.000 --> 0:14:58.720 things that you've not been able to overcome. What you 0:14:58.800 --> 0:15:02.560 are is a whole person with a story and a 0:15:02.680 --> 0:15:05.360 history and a heritage, and a set of genetics and 0:15:05.400 --> 0:15:08.240 epigenetics which is that created the starting point from where 0:15:08.280 --> 0:15:11.360 you are, and a set of traumas and tragedies and 0:15:11.440 --> 0:15:14.160 dramas and maybe massive things that you've been So what 0:15:14.200 --> 0:15:16.360 you are is not just a person who has repeatedly 0:15:16.400 --> 0:15:19.480 failed to accomplish this one thing or repeatedly falls into 0:15:19.480 --> 0:15:22.920 this particular behavior. Give yourself a little bit of self 0:15:22.960 --> 0:15:25.560 care and say, hey, wait a minute, I need to 0:15:25.600 --> 0:15:28.240 have a kind of trauma informed view off and stop 0:15:28.280 --> 0:15:31.040 saying what's the matter with me, and rather say, kind 0:15:31.040 --> 0:15:33.200 of what happened to me? Where have I been? What 0:15:33.280 --> 0:15:35.400 have I been through? Where did I get from my parents? 0:15:35.400 --> 0:15:37.400 What was my starting point? And all of that stuff. 0:15:37.600 --> 0:15:39.920 To just acknowledge to yourself that if you looked at 0:15:39.920 --> 0:15:43.240 another person in the same situation, you would have compassion 0:15:43.320 --> 0:15:47.240 and empathy for them. So give yourself the same perspective. Right, 0:15:47.480 --> 0:15:51.240 have some compassion and empathy for yourself and then say, okay, wait, 0:15:51.560 --> 0:15:54.720 now I've got a set of emotions, feelings and a 0:15:54.760 --> 0:15:58.480 set of thoughts that are all mixed and mingled together 0:15:58.520 --> 0:16:00.920 in a way that I can't possibly say. And I 0:16:00.960 --> 0:16:03.840 know that the baseline generation of feelings is that there 0:16:03.840 --> 0:16:06.640 are neurochemical events and not necessarily facts. And if I 0:16:06.640 --> 0:16:09.160 can learn to discern that, then I can begin to 0:16:09.240 --> 0:16:12.920 apply some reasons in frontal low brain power to what 0:16:12.960 --> 0:16:15.160 I'm feeling before I act on it. And then if 0:16:15.200 --> 0:16:17.400 I can recognize that I have a lot of automatic 0:16:17.480 --> 0:16:20.160 thoughts that aren't necessarily true, and I can learn to 0:16:20.160 --> 0:16:23.160 biapse to them and decide if they're true before I 0:16:23.200 --> 0:16:25.600 take action on them, then I can start to have 0:16:25.720 --> 0:16:28.520 some power in the process of say, wait a minute, 0:16:28.600 --> 0:16:31.600 I know that I don't have to respond every thought 0:16:31.640 --> 0:16:33.640 and feeling, and I know that I can use the 0:16:33.960 --> 0:16:37.480 directed power of my mind to make structural changes in 0:16:37.520 --> 0:16:40.840 my brain and make myself better at being better at 0:16:40.840 --> 0:16:43.680 my own life. Then I've got some power. Now, I've 0:16:43.680 --> 0:16:45.520 got some skin in the game because I'm not a 0:16:45.600 --> 0:16:48.880 victim anymore of the way I've always been. I'm not 0:16:48.920 --> 0:16:51.000 a victim of the way my parents raised me. I'm 0:16:51.040 --> 0:16:53.120 not a victim of the genes that I inherited. Because 0:16:53.160 --> 0:16:54.960 I know that my thoughts can turn them on and 0:16:55.000 --> 0:16:57.600 off and make them better in the future. And I'm 0:16:57.600 --> 0:16:59.360 not even a victim of what I might pass on 0:16:59.360 --> 0:17:01.520 to my kids, because I can make that better too 0:17:01.880 --> 0:17:03.480 by changing the way I think in the way I 0:17:03.520 --> 0:17:06.040 live now, they'll inherit a better set of switched on 0:17:06.119 --> 0:17:08.760 or off jeans than I did. So all of that 0:17:08.880 --> 0:17:12.560 to say, Leanne that if you add the fourth dimension, 0:17:12.640 --> 0:17:15.200 which I think is spiritual, then you say, okay, wait, 0:17:15.320 --> 0:17:18.960 I'm a whole person with the whole vast story that's happening. 0:17:19.080 --> 0:17:21.120 And I'm not just a left brain kind of thing 0:17:21.160 --> 0:17:23.240 that's a two dimensional object that says I am a 0:17:23.240 --> 0:17:26.320 failure or I'm a success. I'm a right hemisphere too, 0:17:26.359 --> 0:17:28.560 which is the whole world around me and all the 0:17:28.640 --> 0:17:32.359 experiences and feelings and nuance and thoughts and all of 0:17:32.400 --> 0:17:36.560 that stuff jumbled up into this entire person that, from 0:17:36.560 --> 0:17:39.679 my perspective, is fearfully and wonderfully made and worthy of 0:17:39.880 --> 0:17:43.760 value and love and honor, that has a purpose and 0:17:43.800 --> 0:17:45.800 a meaning to your life. And if you believe that 0:17:45.880 --> 0:17:48.320 about yourself and that you can change the things that 0:17:48.359 --> 0:17:50.760 you feel like you've been stuck with, there's no limit 0:17:50.840 --> 0:17:51.560 to what you can do. 0:17:52.080 --> 0:17:55.639 Oh my goodness, this is why we love you, doctor Warren. 0:17:55.680 --> 0:17:58.240 That was I mean, that was such a beautiful summation. 0:17:58.520 --> 0:18:01.479 And ladies and the couple of gentlemen that are listening. 0:18:01.520 --> 0:18:04.440 You know, no, really, in all of that, there wasn't 0:18:04.520 --> 0:18:07.560 much said about food or your weight, or there wasn't 0:18:07.560 --> 0:18:09.760 anything said about it. It really comes back to you 0:18:09.800 --> 0:18:12.560 as an entire being, the essence of who you are, 0:18:12.920 --> 0:18:14.679 the worthiness that lives inside of you. 0:18:14.760 --> 0:18:17.000 That has nothing to do with any of those things. 0:18:17.200 --> 0:18:19.720 But if you do want to change those things, start 0:18:19.800 --> 0:18:24.399 in this four dimensional conversation, right, multidimensional conversation. Thank you 0:18:24.480 --> 0:18:26.320 so much for being here. Thank you so much for 0:18:26.359 --> 0:18:28.479