WEBVTT - Savanah Leaf 0:00:00.160 --> 0:00:03.720 You are listening to Ruthie's Table four in partnership with Montclair. 0:00:04.720 --> 0:00:07.200 A few weeks ago, I was invited to a gala 0:00:07.240 --> 0:00:10.520 dinner at the National Theater. The host of My Table, 0:00:10.680 --> 0:00:13.520 Yan Appeal, said she was sitting me next to a 0:00:13.560 --> 0:00:18.120 young filmmaker who had recently won a BAFTA. Then I 0:00:18.160 --> 0:00:21.280 met an artist whose work had just been exhibited at 0:00:21.280 --> 0:00:24.959 hauserin Worth Gallery in Los Angeles and is about to 0:00:25.000 --> 0:00:27.720 be shown at the San Francisco Museum of Modern Art. 0:00:28.720 --> 0:00:32.800 Then I met a champion volleyball player who, aged eighteen, 0:00:32.920 --> 0:00:37.599 represented Britain in the twenty twelve London Olympics. To day 0:00:37.680 --> 0:00:41.599 in the River Cafe, I'm about to talk with all three, 0:00:42.000 --> 0:00:46.600 as Savannah Leaf incredibly is them all? The London born, 0:00:46.800 --> 0:00:52.000 California raised athlete turned artist who still only thirty, has 0:00:52.200 --> 0:00:55.120 just won the baft Of for Best British Debut Director 0:00:55.600 --> 0:00:59.880 for her powerful film Earth Mamma. Executive chef of the 0:01:00.120 --> 0:01:04.000 River Cafe, Sean Owen is joining us. Now we are 0:01:04.080 --> 0:01:09.160 five cook, an artist, a director, an athlete and me 0:01:09.920 --> 0:01:16.640 women rule. I love that. Yeah, we're good. 0:01:16.760 --> 0:01:17.360 So it was. 0:01:17.440 --> 0:01:19.280 It was an amazing dinner, wasn't it It? 0:01:19.319 --> 0:01:20.119 Was really nice. 0:01:20.240 --> 0:01:22.560 You never know who you're going to sit next to you, 0:01:22.560 --> 0:01:27.720 you know, I don't know me too, next to each other, 0:01:27.920 --> 0:01:30.039 and it was it was a pretty amazing night. Was 0:01:30.360 --> 0:01:34.800 because it was a gala supporting the National Theater and 0:01:34.840 --> 0:01:38.280 it was really created by the actors and the director. 0:01:38.720 --> 0:01:43.360 Yeah, you really felt like the theater experience while also 0:01:43.560 --> 0:01:47.160 going to a galla with food and you know, an 0:01:47.200 --> 0:01:49.320 auction and all of it. But it was really nice 0:01:49.320 --> 0:01:53.120 to just be seated next to you and and talking 0:01:53.160 --> 0:01:56.160 to you about everything architecture, food. 0:01:57.000 --> 0:02:01.600 Films, covered volleybool, volleyball, volleyball, and I think what you know, 0:02:02.920 --> 0:02:05.080 I mean, I think you very often meet people who 0:02:05.160 --> 0:02:09.200 do different things. You know that they can be well, 0:02:09.240 --> 0:02:11.160 they could be a chef, they could be a writer, 0:02:11.320 --> 0:02:13.600 they could be an actor and a mother. They could 0:02:13.639 --> 0:02:17.480 be an actor and a director and love to swim. 0:02:17.520 --> 0:02:22.639 There are people who do combine different parts of life together. 0:02:23.240 --> 0:02:25.200 And then there are people who do one thing you know, 0:02:25.280 --> 0:02:27.360 so that's fine too. Or some people do nothing and 0:02:27.400 --> 0:02:31.919 that's fine too. But you know, so from interesting to meet, 0:02:32.400 --> 0:02:35.360 I've ever met anyone who was an Olympic, much less 0:02:35.440 --> 0:02:38.919 a volleyball player in the Olympics. So I think it's 0:02:39.000 --> 0:02:43.239 interesting how you have taken those parallel lives and put 0:02:43.240 --> 0:02:45.919 them together. There's lots to talk about food, and lots 0:02:45.960 --> 0:02:49.040 to talk about how you got where you are and 0:02:49.080 --> 0:02:52.120 what you want to do, But how does the combination 0:02:52.360 --> 0:02:56.920 of being an athlete and being an artist, what has 0:02:56.960 --> 0:02:58.200 that taught you. 0:02:58.400 --> 0:02:59.320 At this point? 0:02:59.800 --> 0:03:03.120 It's it sounds really weird saying that I played in 0:03:03.120 --> 0:03:05.600 the Olympics and you know, have made a film and 0:03:06.600 --> 0:03:10.760 do video art, and it sounds like not like a 0:03:11.120 --> 0:03:13.640 typical kind of narrative. But when I look back on it, 0:03:13.720 --> 0:03:16.160 I really feel there's a lot of parallels, you know, 0:03:18.440 --> 0:03:22.960 and the transition doesn't feel as crazy because because when 0:03:23.000 --> 0:03:26.560 I was an athlete, I was working in a team environment. 0:03:26.760 --> 0:03:29.919 You're very good under pressure a lot of the times, 0:03:30.160 --> 0:03:33.840 and you're kind of looking at all your teammates around 0:03:33.840 --> 0:03:35.840 you and you're seeing what their strengths are and then 0:03:35.880 --> 0:03:38.800 you're trying to pull that out of them, and you're 0:03:38.800 --> 0:03:41.440 also seeing their weaknesses and where you can kind of 0:03:41.640 --> 0:03:44.760 fill in or help them in spaces that they're struggling with. 0:03:44.840 --> 0:03:48.280 And it's all about this kind of movement towards a 0:03:48.280 --> 0:03:52.560 common goal, you know, and at the time also when 0:03:52.600 --> 0:03:54.320 I played in the Olympics, I was also going to 0:03:54.400 --> 0:03:59.320 university in Miami and I was playing Division one volleyball there. 0:03:59.360 --> 0:04:02.600 And while I was at that university, I studied psychology 0:04:03.320 --> 0:04:06.240 and human and social development. So I was already thinking 0:04:06.320 --> 0:04:11.119 about kind of how we interacted our societies and what 0:04:11.360 --> 0:04:14.240 individuals struggle within their own kind of mental health. 0:04:14.320 --> 0:04:17.320 And so I. 0:04:17.279 --> 0:04:20.120 Was thinking about kind of like society and how we 0:04:20.120 --> 0:04:24.240 can help one another or kind of focus on individuals stories. 0:04:24.279 --> 0:04:26.880 And then I was also in this team environment. So 0:04:26.920 --> 0:04:29.680 in a way, like film is kind of a combination 0:04:29.839 --> 0:04:32.200 of all of that, because you have to kind of 0:04:33.080 --> 0:04:37.160 work in a similar setting. You have this like clock 0:04:37.640 --> 0:04:39.880 while you're on set, and you have this kind of 0:04:40.880 --> 0:04:43.600 the day is, you know, moving quickly and you have 0:04:43.680 --> 0:04:45.880 to get to this common goal and you have to 0:04:45.920 --> 0:04:48.719 make quick decisions, and there's like an intuition there that 0:04:48.800 --> 0:04:51.120 I think is kind of very common in a lot 0:04:51.160 --> 0:04:56.200 of these artistic scenarios. And then you also have this 0:04:56.360 --> 0:04:59.320 kind of study on the character and the human development 0:04:59.360 --> 0:05:03.520 and society. And then you have artistic expression, which is 0:05:03.560 --> 0:05:06.160 something I felt like I was lacking in sports, you know, 0:05:06.320 --> 0:05:08.480 like I didn't get to share my mind or what 0:05:08.640 --> 0:05:12.000 was going on in terms of my worldview. 0:05:12.200 --> 0:05:14.000 And so there was a. 0:05:13.920 --> 0:05:17.080 Point in sports where I was like, I need to 0:05:17.160 --> 0:05:20.080 share my voice. I have all these stories inside of me, 0:05:20.240 --> 0:05:23.680 but I haven't been able to show them because all 0:05:23.680 --> 0:05:26.200 I'm doing is expressing. 0:05:25.720 --> 0:05:26.600 Things with my body. 0:05:26.640 --> 0:05:28.520 So all of a sudden, I could start expressing things 0:05:28.600 --> 0:05:31.520 with my mind and that that was very liberating for me. 0:05:31.960 --> 0:05:37.520 I want to you then segued from volleyball to film. 0:05:37.560 --> 0:05:40.080 Did you start out as an actor in a film? 0:05:40.160 --> 0:05:42.880 Did you just play small films? Well? 0:05:42.920 --> 0:05:46.960 My first well, I think like ever since I was 0:05:47.000 --> 0:05:50.479 a kid, I was like painting or drawing or doing 0:05:51.000 --> 0:05:56.360 you know, different variations of art. And then I got 0:05:56.360 --> 0:05:59.080 injured playing in Puerto Rico. Because I was playing professionally 0:05:59.080 --> 0:06:00.719 in Puerto Rico at the time. 0:06:00.320 --> 0:06:02.360 What is Andreie, you would suffer in volleybale. 0:06:03.880 --> 0:06:07.760 So I had stress fractures in both of my legs. 0:06:08.040 --> 0:06:11.640 And at the time they were telling me, which actually 0:06:11.760 --> 0:06:15.279 relates to food in a funny way, I had transitioned. 0:06:15.320 --> 0:06:18.240 When I was in TMGB, I was like eating everything 0:06:18.279 --> 0:06:20.640 and then I started becoming like a pescatarian. Then I 0:06:20.680 --> 0:06:24.359 became a vegan because I realized, like I was eating 0:06:24.440 --> 0:06:27.680 kind of everything and anything like Burger King McDonald's. Literally 0:06:27.760 --> 0:06:31.240 every day was just like downing as much food as possible, 0:06:31.320 --> 0:06:34.200 like six eggs for breakfast, just excessive. 0:06:33.680 --> 0:06:34.359 Amount of food. 0:06:34.960 --> 0:06:37.080 And then when I got to the Olympics and I 0:06:37.080 --> 0:06:40.279 started getting a nutritionist, they were kind of like, ah, 0:06:40.320 --> 0:06:43.040 you're a little bit you're like not eating very healthy. 0:06:43.080 --> 0:06:45.039 You're kind of a little bit heavier than you should be, 0:06:45.240 --> 0:06:48.720 and you need to kind of like be thinking about 0:06:48.720 --> 0:06:51.080 what you're eating and the kind of energy you're preserving, 0:06:51.200 --> 0:06:54.120 and you know how you can kind of utilize that energy. 0:06:54.160 --> 0:06:56.160 And so it kind of started to get me thinking 0:06:56.240 --> 0:06:59.360 about food a little bit more. But when I went 0:06:59.400 --> 0:07:03.960 back to I decided to just like go full throttle 0:07:04.000 --> 0:07:07.279 like vegan, and so I just cut everything. But I 0:07:07.279 --> 0:07:10.520 didn't really know how to like balance that vegan diet. 0:07:10.720 --> 0:07:11.440 So I was just. 0:07:11.440 --> 0:07:14.280 Kind of eating like an insane amount of like bananas 0:07:14.320 --> 0:07:17.840 and bruccoli and like but not really thinking about what 0:07:18.040 --> 0:07:19.920 is what is that food? 0:07:20.000 --> 0:07:21.480 Were you having enough protein? Then? 0:07:21.640 --> 0:07:24.760 So exactly that, So when I went and played in 0:07:24.920 --> 0:07:27.680 Puerto Rico like a few years later, I had such 0:07:27.680 --> 0:07:30.600 a strict diet, but I got these stress fractors in 0:07:30.680 --> 0:07:33.400 my bones and my shins and my bones were becoming 0:07:33.440 --> 0:07:37.640 really frail, and I don't know, maybe it's just the overworking. 0:07:37.720 --> 0:07:41.720 I was working like all through the year, both for 0:07:41.840 --> 0:07:44.760 Team GB and England and then also professionally. I was 0:07:44.800 --> 0:07:47.080 literally taking no time off and a lot of times 0:07:47.120 --> 0:07:50.120 you're jumping in a gym with like just cement beneath 0:07:50.120 --> 0:07:53.600 your legs, and so you're just completely over overworking yourself. 0:07:53.680 --> 0:07:57.720 But then when I went to the doctors, they were saying, oh, 0:07:57.840 --> 0:08:00.560 like it could be because you're not getting enough vitamin 0:08:00.640 --> 0:08:03.960 D and you're not getting enough nutrients for your bones 0:08:04.000 --> 0:08:08.760 to kind of maintain while you're overworking them. Basically, they 0:08:08.800 --> 0:08:11.200 told me I had to either put rods in my 0:08:11.320 --> 0:08:14.240 legs or I would have to take at. 0:08:14.280 --> 0:08:15.680 Least a year off, if not more. 0:08:16.280 --> 0:08:18.120 And they said during that time, if I take that 0:08:18.160 --> 0:08:20.960 time off, I can't walk much. I have to just 0:08:21.040 --> 0:08:24.800 like be as still as possible, don't do exercises any 0:08:24.920 --> 0:08:26.880 If you do any exercise, ass be in the pool. 0:08:27.960 --> 0:08:31.240 And so it really forced me to like sit and 0:08:31.720 --> 0:08:34.560 think about kind of what my life was at that 0:08:34.840 --> 0:08:37.320 kind of young age and how long I wanted to 0:08:37.360 --> 0:08:40.000 do this for and like, at what age do you retire? 0:08:40.880 --> 0:08:42.120 Can I go back to this? 0:08:42.200 --> 0:08:45.000 And so? And am I happy doing what I'm doing? 0:08:45.240 --> 0:08:50.720 And I started thinking about what else could I be? Like? 0:08:50.760 --> 0:08:51.120 What else? 0:08:51.400 --> 0:08:54.200 I've always been known as this athlete because you see 0:08:54.200 --> 0:08:57.280 me when I walk in, I'm like very tall, athletic looking. 0:08:57.480 --> 0:08:59.840 It's like instantly what people think of when they see me. 0:09:00.720 --> 0:09:03.040 And so I started kind of thinking of myself as 0:09:03.120 --> 0:09:07.800 more than an athlete. And that was like very liberating. 0:09:14.720 --> 0:09:19.400 The River Cafe is excited. We're opening the River Cafe. Cafe. 0:09:20.240 --> 0:09:23.920 Come from a morning Briosian cappuccino, a plate of seasonal 0:09:23.920 --> 0:09:27.640 antipasty on the terrace, or an ice cream or a 0:09:27.640 --> 0:09:31.360 paratibo in the sun. We can't wait to open, and 0:09:31.400 --> 0:09:42.559 we cannot wait to welcome you. In your family growing 0:09:42.640 --> 0:09:45.440 up as a child, what was food like in your family? 0:09:45.480 --> 0:09:49.160 Did your mother cook? Did you sit around the table 0:09:50.080 --> 0:09:54.320 being a child in the household? You had a single 0:09:54.360 --> 0:09:56.960 parent and you grew up in San Francisco. 0:09:57.360 --> 0:10:00.079 Well, so I grew up half my life here in 0:09:59.840 --> 0:10:03.560 a in Vauxhall, and I grew up with just my 0:10:03.679 --> 0:10:08.360 mom when I was little, and uh, it was you know, 0:10:08.440 --> 0:10:14.199 she's working long hours, and so sometimes it was neighbors 0:10:14.200 --> 0:10:18.240 that are I'm eating dinner with, or sometimes it's my mom, 0:10:18.320 --> 0:10:21.160 and so it would be a mixture of things. 0:10:21.200 --> 0:10:22.600 And we were an only child. 0:10:22.760 --> 0:10:25.080 I was an only child until I was sixteen, and 0:10:25.080 --> 0:10:27.080 then my mom had my sister. 0:10:26.840 --> 0:10:29.680 Growing up though, growing up the all So would she 0:10:29.720 --> 0:10:31.000 come back from home. 0:10:31.240 --> 0:10:33.760 Yeah, sometimes it would be late, sometimes it'd be late, 0:10:33.800 --> 0:10:36.199 And I think like as I got older, there was 0:10:36.240 --> 0:10:39.680 a lot of like you know, microwaveable meals or whatever 0:10:40.600 --> 0:10:43.080 you could have, especially like when you're also thinking about 0:10:43.120 --> 0:10:45.880 I would then go to sports practice. 0:10:45.920 --> 0:10:48.120 I'd go to volleyball practice or basketball practice. 0:10:48.160 --> 0:10:50.000 What day should you stop playing volleyball? 0:10:50.280 --> 0:10:54.400 I think I was like nine, maybe, Yeah, a lot 0:10:54.400 --> 0:10:56.680 of times, like my mom would be riving home and 0:10:56.720 --> 0:10:59.320 I'd be going to practice or something like that, so 0:10:59.440 --> 0:11:03.600 I would have to eat before she came home. But 0:11:03.640 --> 0:11:08.160 then also, like I think there was different stages sometimes, 0:11:09.520 --> 0:11:11.680 you know, there was also times where my mom would 0:11:11.760 --> 0:11:14.800 make something on a Sunday and then there would be 0:11:14.880 --> 0:11:16.720 leftover so I could eat it for the next couple 0:11:16.720 --> 0:11:17.000 of days. 0:11:17.040 --> 0:11:20.320 You have grandparents around, no, because. 0:11:21.720 --> 0:11:23.679 I grew up with only my mom, and then we 0:11:23.720 --> 0:11:27.439 moved to the Bay Area in California, and my grandma 0:11:27.480 --> 0:11:28.840 lives in Yorkshire, Weatherby. 0:11:29.040 --> 0:11:29.800 Do you know where that is? 0:11:29.920 --> 0:11:30.280 Yeah? 0:11:30.320 --> 0:11:35.280 Okay, so my grandma lives in Weatherby, and so she 0:11:35.400 --> 0:11:39.360 wasn't really around. We would sometimes go for Christmas or 0:11:39.400 --> 0:11:43.760 something like that. But my grandma had this like really 0:11:43.800 --> 0:11:46.520 simple pasta and I remember just like asking my mom 0:11:46.559 --> 0:11:48.600 for it all the time, and it was the most 0:11:48.600 --> 0:11:53.320 simple thing. It was literally like penne pasta with like 0:11:53.360 --> 0:11:55.959 a tin red sauce and then cheese on top and 0:11:56.040 --> 0:11:57.800 you put it in the oven. But for some reason 0:11:57.840 --> 0:12:01.120 it like had this kind of I don't know. I 0:12:01.160 --> 0:12:03.680 would just ask my mom for it like all the time, 0:12:03.760 --> 0:12:06.400 and I think even now we call it like Grandma's 0:12:06.440 --> 0:12:09.360 famous famous pos even though very simple. 0:12:11.679 --> 0:12:13.840 San Francisco. What was that like for you to move? 0:12:14.640 --> 0:12:15.480 How old are you then? 0:12:16.000 --> 0:12:17.600 I was eight years old when I moved. 0:12:17.800 --> 0:12:19.360 So did you start playing volleyball? 0:12:19.600 --> 0:12:20.440 When I got there? 0:12:20.960 --> 0:12:23.640 And I started seeing because volleyball is not really like 0:12:23.679 --> 0:12:26.320 a big thing in the UK at all. I think, 0:12:26.400 --> 0:12:29.199 like in the London twenty twelve Olympics is when people realize, 0:12:29.920 --> 0:12:33.199 you know, what kind of sport it was? But when 0:12:33.240 --> 0:12:37.160 I moved to the Bay Area, volleyball and basketball were huge. 0:12:37.640 --> 0:12:40.000 And for what was when I saw women? 0:12:40.480 --> 0:12:44.360 Yeah, for women, for young girls, and I mean I 0:12:44.360 --> 0:12:46.880 think basketball I was more excited about at the time. 0:12:47.080 --> 0:12:49.319 But I was like, I've always been a kid that 0:12:50.080 --> 0:12:52.560 hung around a lot of guys, and so I would 0:12:53.320 --> 0:12:55.600 There was like this basketball hoop kind of close to 0:12:55.640 --> 0:12:57.520 my house where all the guys would play and they 0:12:57.520 --> 0:12:59.199 would ask me if I wanted to join it, and 0:12:59.320 --> 0:13:02.640 so I would join in. But you went for volleyball 0:13:02.679 --> 0:13:05.600 over basketball, Yeah, because I was better at volleyball. Yeah, 0:13:06.200 --> 0:13:10.920 and I was stronger at it, and I was starting 0:13:10.920 --> 0:13:14.720 to people were noticing me for volleyball, and like I 0:13:14.760 --> 0:13:17.199 was getting a lot of offers to play in university, 0:13:17.280 --> 0:13:21.200 and the more offers I got, I realized, like, let's 0:13:21.240 --> 0:13:23.880 lean into that, you know, let's lean into the where 0:13:24.200 --> 0:13:26.400 I naturally am like better. 0:13:26.800 --> 0:13:27.920 What does your mother think? 0:13:28.920 --> 0:13:31.480 I think she was just like excited to see me 0:13:31.960 --> 0:13:34.520 finding something I was good at. Also, it was something 0:13:34.559 --> 0:13:36.400 like I could go and play in university and have 0:13:36.520 --> 0:13:41.800 everything paid for and have like this whole trajectory in 0:13:41.840 --> 0:13:44.120 my life, and so she was excited to watch that. 0:13:46.320 --> 0:13:49.000 But yeah, It's very moving to me. The way you 0:13:49.160 --> 0:13:55.080 spoke about about being in a team, in the space 0:13:55.840 --> 0:13:59.280 into another space to help someone, having someone move into 0:13:59.320 --> 0:14:05.800 your space, the the collaboration. That reminded me of what 0:14:05.840 --> 0:14:08.560 we do here. Yeah, you know, probably and in many 0:14:08.640 --> 0:14:12.079 many offices, many fields, there are people who, as I say, 0:14:12.280 --> 0:14:14.680 like to work at home by themselves in a room 0:14:14.679 --> 0:14:17.120 with the typewriter, or the people who really seek out 0:14:17.960 --> 0:14:20.320 kind of feel. And I think cinema, I was on 0:14:20.360 --> 0:14:24.840 a set the other day and it really struck me 0:14:24.880 --> 0:14:28.080 how similar probably or in the National theater, how many, 0:14:28.480 --> 0:14:32.400 how many similarities they are I thought at the time 0:14:32.440 --> 0:14:34.280 between a restaurant and. 0:14:34.800 --> 0:14:37.840 Yeah, I can see it even now, like just looking 0:14:37.880 --> 0:14:41.440 into the kitchen and seeing everyone kind of knows their position, 0:14:41.560 --> 0:14:43.640 but then also can help each other out if they 0:14:43.680 --> 0:14:48.480 need to. But yeah, that's it's something that I think 0:14:48.520 --> 0:14:51.840 about a lot when I get when I'm like in 0:14:51.880 --> 0:14:54.920 the hiring position, you know, as a director you're thinking 0:14:54.960 --> 0:14:58.120 about who can I hire and balance out on a 0:14:58.240 --> 0:15:00.560 set because I need Sometimes I I want to hire 0:15:00.600 --> 0:15:02.880 some that's never done this role before, but I like 0:15:02.960 --> 0:15:06.680 them for their kind of general vision, you know. For 0:15:07.360 --> 0:15:11.000 my film Earth mamac I hired this costume designer who 0:15:11.040 --> 0:15:14.520 had never done a film before, but she just had 0:15:14.600 --> 0:15:17.760 such a great taste for it, and so it's like 0:15:18.040 --> 0:15:21.240 a matter of hiring her and then hiring someone that's 0:15:21.760 --> 0:15:24.720 very experienced that can work with her, you know, as 0:15:25.040 --> 0:15:28.000 a kind of under her to help kind of manage everything. 0:15:28.040 --> 0:15:31.120 And so I like that idea of hiring and kind 0:15:31.120 --> 0:15:35.400 of thinking, how can we find people from different places 0:15:35.440 --> 0:15:40.240 to help this vision be progressive and challenge the way 0:15:40.320 --> 0:15:43.120 cinema is made. But then I also kind of have 0:15:43.240 --> 0:15:45.200 the experience of some of these people that have done 0:15:45.200 --> 0:15:46.360 it time and time again. 0:15:46.520 --> 0:15:50.080 You know, during this period when you became interested in 0:15:50.120 --> 0:15:52.920 doing film working and then you say how you started, 0:15:53.280 --> 0:15:56.480 and then when you were in a situation of being 0:15:56.560 --> 0:15:59.680 actually a director, yeah, and you could create your own 0:15:59.720 --> 0:16:01.840 work world? Was that very well? Yeah? 0:16:02.520 --> 0:16:03.600 I didn't take long. 0:16:03.680 --> 0:16:05.560 I started working for a company and then I like 0:16:06.600 --> 0:16:11.120 left maybe four months in or something and kind of 0:16:11.160 --> 0:16:12.320 saved up money and made. 0:16:12.200 --> 0:16:13.480 My first little short. 0:16:13.920 --> 0:16:14.440 What was that? 0:16:14.960 --> 0:16:16.040 It was called f Word. 0:16:17.120 --> 0:16:20.880 It was kind of about a girl who's coping with 0:16:21.680 --> 0:16:26.640 not knowing her father. At a biographical yes, it is, 0:16:26.720 --> 0:16:29.840 but it's also you fictionalize it a little bit to 0:16:29.880 --> 0:16:31.240 have a bit of distance to it. 0:16:31.520 --> 0:16:33.120 How long ago was that? 0:16:33.120 --> 0:16:34.800 That was twenty fifteen? 0:16:34.920 --> 0:16:39.600 I think I was twenty one and then actually it's 0:16:39.640 --> 0:16:42.760 interesting you thinking about, like, you know, shifting your career 0:16:42.920 --> 0:16:47.760 finding ways because then you know, eight years later, I 0:16:47.760 --> 0:16:52.880 guess Earth Mama was released in twenty three last year, 0:16:52.920 --> 0:16:55.960 which is my first feature film, which feels like a 0:16:55.960 --> 0:16:58.840 big shift from them from doing your first, you know, 0:16:58.920 --> 0:17:02.680 little short film to doing your first feature film, and 0:17:02.720 --> 0:17:06.760 then last year also releasing like a piece of video 0:17:06.880 --> 0:17:10.919 art and like moving into the video arts space and 0:17:11.000 --> 0:17:11.680 the art world. 0:17:11.760 --> 0:17:14.639 And I don't know. 0:17:14.680 --> 0:17:16.640 I think you get to a point in your career 0:17:16.720 --> 0:17:19.399 where you've been doing it for almost ten years and 0:17:19.440 --> 0:17:21.879 then you feel like how can I challenge myself in 0:17:21.920 --> 0:17:25.119 a whole other space or like keep evolving? And I 0:17:25.160 --> 0:17:29.399 think for myself, I hope that I'm always like that 0:17:29.520 --> 0:17:33.040 throughout my whole life, is like always not afraid to 0:17:33.119 --> 0:17:36.040 take that kind of jump into a new space, because 0:17:36.760 --> 0:17:39.400 the idea of having one job for all of your 0:17:39.400 --> 0:17:42.320 life doesn't excite me. Like for me, I need to 0:17:42.400 --> 0:17:43.639 have those shifts, you know. 0:17:44.240 --> 0:17:46.560 Can you tell us about the movie? 0:17:46.800 --> 0:17:49.800 Earth Mama is about a young woman who has two 0:17:49.880 --> 0:17:52.120 children in foster care and one child on the way, 0:17:52.880 --> 0:17:57.040 and it's all set in the Bay Area, and she 0:17:57.240 --> 0:17:59.040 is trying to figure out what she's going to do 0:17:59.080 --> 0:18:03.040 with her unborn child, whether she's going to give her 0:18:03.119 --> 0:18:05.560 child up for adoption or try to keep it. And 0:18:05.600 --> 0:18:10.639 so there's kind of this dilemma there of whether or 0:18:10.640 --> 0:18:13.440 not as well whether the system is going to allow 0:18:13.520 --> 0:18:16.720 her to keep her child or not. So it kind 0:18:16.720 --> 0:18:20.159 of goes through her final days of her pregnancy and 0:18:20.200 --> 0:18:23.600 how she maneuvers those those obstacles. 0:18:24.160 --> 0:18:27.760 When we talk about adoption, yeah, and I'm a mother 0:18:27.800 --> 0:18:30.320 of an adopted child, A lot of it is about love. 0:18:30.560 --> 0:18:32.440 As a mother, I had one child that was I 0:18:32.480 --> 0:18:35.720 would say, handed to me on my breast after giving birth, 0:18:35.760 --> 0:18:37.639 and another child who was handed to me in a 0:18:37.680 --> 0:18:41.840 hotel lobby, you know, in Philadelphia, and then I remember 0:18:41.840 --> 0:18:44.879 going up on the elevator and thinking I could no 0:18:45.000 --> 0:18:47.879 sooner give this baby away, yeah, you know, than the 0:18:47.880 --> 0:18:50.359 one that I was I gave birth to. And I think, 0:18:50.800 --> 0:18:54.159 and it is about what is what is love? What 0:18:54.240 --> 0:18:59.080 is protection? What is taken care of? And so I 0:18:59.119 --> 0:19:04.320 think that and you experienced that with yeah, your own sisters. 0:19:04.000 --> 0:19:08.760 Yeah, yeah, exactly. Well, the film is like roughly based 0:19:08.800 --> 0:19:11.440 on my relationship to my own sister. My sister was 0:19:11.480 --> 0:19:15.080 adopted when I was sixteen. It was a really pivotal 0:19:15.119 --> 0:19:17.560 moment in my life, which is why I wanted to 0:19:17.600 --> 0:19:20.239 make this film because for me as a sixteen year 0:19:20.280 --> 0:19:23.760 old meeting her birth mother and like sitting across from 0:19:23.840 --> 0:19:29.520 her and just thinking about this kind of selfless act 0:19:29.680 --> 0:19:32.120 that she was going to do, but also the pressures 0:19:32.119 --> 0:19:34.960 in her life at that time and how she was 0:19:35.000 --> 0:19:38.119 going to have to make that decision. And she told 0:19:38.160 --> 0:19:39.840 me at the time, she said, I want you to 0:19:39.880 --> 0:19:42.760 be the role model that I can't be in her life. 0:19:42.880 --> 0:19:46.520 And I remember like that shifting something within me because 0:19:46.560 --> 0:19:49.840 it just all of us. When you're an only child, 0:19:49.840 --> 0:19:52.560 you don't have that same sort of responsibility as you 0:19:52.640 --> 0:19:55.439 have as you know, an older sister or a parent, 0:19:56.200 --> 0:19:58.600 and at that age, being sixteen, I almost felt like 0:19:58.600 --> 0:20:01.320 a second parent, you know, to my siblings. 0:20:01.320 --> 0:20:02.200 Did you cook for her? 0:20:03.480 --> 0:20:06.359 She was so young, she was like, I was giving 0:20:06.400 --> 0:20:11.640 her the bottle, so I was, I was doing that, 0:20:11.720 --> 0:20:15.480 but she I left the house before she really started 0:20:15.520 --> 0:20:16.520 eating foods. 0:20:17.160 --> 0:20:20.040 You have a scene in the movie which takes place 0:20:20.080 --> 0:20:22.960 in a restaurant. Yeah, and it's a very emotional scene. 0:20:23.040 --> 0:20:24.040 Yeah, yeah. 0:20:24.160 --> 0:20:25.359 Can you describe the scene. 0:20:25.440 --> 0:20:28.119 Yeah, So there's this moment which is actually, you know, 0:20:28.200 --> 0:20:31.679 in the first draft of the script, I wrote it, 0:20:31.760 --> 0:20:33.960 and there was one scene that's stuck through that whole 0:20:34.000 --> 0:20:36.080 first draft, which was the scene that you're talking about, 0:20:36.119 --> 0:20:38.159 which is the middle point of the film, which is 0:20:38.200 --> 0:20:41.840 where the birth mother meets the adoptive family for the 0:20:41.880 --> 0:20:47.320 first time and they meet over food over in a restaurant, 0:20:47.560 --> 0:20:52.639 and it's kind of playing with this the uncomfortability, but 0:20:52.720 --> 0:20:56.840 also the intrigue and the questions you have all these 0:20:56.840 --> 0:20:59.560 feelings that arise when you're sitting across the table from 0:20:59.560 --> 0:21:02.399 someone who who's potentially going to be giving her child 0:21:02.600 --> 0:21:05.840 to you, and you kind of anticipating that child, whether 0:21:05.880 --> 0:21:09.800 you couldn't have children before that, or what that anticipation 0:21:09.880 --> 0:21:13.119 is like. And also as a sister, what it was 0:21:13.240 --> 0:21:16.960 like to sit across from this person that you're kind 0:21:17.000 --> 0:21:20.480 of know nothing about, but they're potentially changing your whole life. 0:21:21.400 --> 0:21:23.879 So it was such an important scene in the film, 0:21:23.920 --> 0:21:26.960 and it started in the first draft and maintained throughout 0:21:27.000 --> 0:21:30.000 the whole film. But I think it's also been one 0:21:30.040 --> 0:21:32.560 of the things that people take home or take with 0:21:32.680 --> 0:21:33.480 them the most. 0:21:33.880 --> 0:21:36.400 In the movie, it's interesting in the see the detailed 0:21:36.480 --> 0:21:39.880