Speaker 1: Hey, this is Stephen Ferdick. I'm the pastor of Elevation
Speaker 1: Church and this is our podcast. I wanted to thank
Speaker 1: you for joining us today. Hope this inspires you. Hope
Speaker 1: it builds your faith. Hope it gives your perspective to
Speaker 1: see God is moving in your life. Enjoy the message
Speaker 1: today is going to be amazing. Yeah. So this is
Speaker 1: like not my iPad. This is like not my iPad cover.
Speaker 1: This is a feminine iPad cover, so that can only
Speaker 1: mean one thing. And the table is even marble, so
Speaker 1: that can only mean one thing. Holly Ferdick is bringing
Speaker 1: the word today. Come on, look at this artesian Bible cover.
Speaker 1: That must mean Holly Ferdick is preaching the word. Look
Speaker 1: at this hand drawn Bible study Philippians. Come on, let's
Speaker 1: thank God for Holly. I'm gonna leave her by herself
Speaker 1: in a minute. Last week I preached to her, and
Speaker 1: now you owe me pay backtime you got to preach
Speaker 1: to me. So I'm gonna go sit in my seat
Speaker 1: and I know that you're excited to hear God's word
Speaker 1: from this woman. You should be, because who preaches to
Speaker 1: you today lives a better sermon than anything that ever
Speaker 1: comes from her lips. Trust me. I live with her
Speaker 1: and the stuff that she doesn't show on Instagram is
Speaker 1: the best stuff. People say to me. I just love Holly.
Speaker 1: I'm like, no, you don't. I love Holly because I
Speaker 1: know it and I know how deepro authenticity really is,
Speaker 1: and so I thank God for you. But I also
Speaker 1: want to say this, Rebecca Summers. Where's Rebecca. I bet
Speaker 1: she's around the building somewhere doing a chat host or
Speaker 1: something like that, probably praying for somebody, or casting out
Speaker 1: a devil online something like that, doing a digital exorcism.
Speaker 1: She was saying at the Rhythm night that our team
Speaker 1: has been doing a great job for our youth. Make
Speaker 1: sure you subscribe to Elevation Youth on YouTube, Okay, so
Speaker 1: you can get the word. But she was saying I
Speaker 1: heard them do a panel one day and they were
Speaker 1: saying who's influenced you the most? And she said you.
Speaker 1: I think she said a few other people, but you
Speaker 1: were in the top three. She said, Da Da Da
Speaker 1: Da Da and Holly Ferdick. And I was like, if
Speaker 1: you only knew, She's one of these people that the
Speaker 1: closer that you get, the better that she looks. Some
Speaker 1: people can impress from a distance, but impartation happens up close.
Speaker 1: Thank you, so right now I want you to take
Speaker 1: this pulpit and minister to the people. I'm excited. I
Speaker 1: got a preview of the word, and I'm gonna sit down,
Speaker 1: just the two of us, just the one of you.
Speaker 1: Let's give it up today. Everybody's saying the Chad, welcome, Holly, well, hello, elevation.
Speaker 1: We're here together. Worshiping again is what we do every week.
Speaker 1: If this is super assignment, sure you come back, because
Speaker 1: we're here over and over again all day to day.
Speaker 1: If the message minister's to you, share it with someone
Speaker 1: and tell them, hey, you can catch it again. I'm
Speaker 1: thirty eleven, thirty two, five, ten, Hey, all of them,
Speaker 1: we're here. We want to see you, and we want
Speaker 1: to be able to minister to you every week. I
Speaker 1: am just really excited that you have set aside the
Speaker 1: time today to worship with us. I know that God
Speaker 1: is going to speak to you as you focus your
Speaker 1: attention on Him for just the next few moments that
Speaker 1: we have together. You guys that are in the room
Speaker 1: can go ahead and be seated. This has been a
Speaker 1: really incredible season of ministry. For our church. I just
Speaker 1: every time I get up on this stage, I just
Speaker 1: I'm so proud of our teams. And one of the
Speaker 1: teams at Elevation that has really risen to the occasion
Speaker 1: over the past six months is our E groups teams.
Speaker 1: It's one of my favorite teams. This is a small team.
Speaker 1: They're not nearly as big as our worship team. And
Speaker 1: maybe you've been worshiping with us for a while and
Speaker 1: you've heard us talk about E groups but you're not
Speaker 1: exactly sure what they are. E groups are away for
Speaker 1: the people of Elevation Church to gather together in small
Speaker 1: groups and just support each other and go through life
Speaker 1: together and just offer a place for you to continue
Speaker 1: to grow in your faith. And thanks to technology, we
Speaker 1: have people from all over the world who come together
Speaker 1: each week. Sometimes they're in home, sometimes they're on Zoom.
Speaker 1: And I really want you to be a part of
Speaker 1: an E group. So if you're a part of an
Speaker 1: E group, though, help me out. Tell the people in
Speaker 1: the chat what are they missing out on? Tell them
Speaker 1: how amazing your eGroup is, and just a few words,
Speaker 1: because nobody wants to read a whole lot of stuff.
Speaker 1: You know, the Bible says that the gates of Hell
Speaker 1: will not prevail against God's Church, and I believe that
Speaker 1: we are stronger than ever. And so I just wanted
Speaker 1: to take a minute because I have the stage, and
Speaker 1: just officially invite you to join an E group because
Speaker 1: now is the time, because over the sixth the past
Speaker 1: six months, I have been working with our teams on
Speaker 1: a study on the Book of Philippians. Isn't it beauty full? Too?
Speaker 1: You can get a copy of the study and join us.
Speaker 1: Philippians is the most joyful book in the Bible, but
Speaker 1: yet did you know that it was written from a
Speaker 1: prison cell? And so over the next five weeks, our
Speaker 1: groups are going to be setting aside time to read
Speaker 1: through the Book of Philippines together and just learn. We
Speaker 1: called it Philippians the Art of Contentment because Paul. How
Speaker 1: was it possible that Paul was able to have so
Speaker 1: much joy in the midst of a literal lockdown? And
Speaker 1: We're gonna study God's word together and we're going to
Speaker 1: talk about it. And I believe that God wants to
Speaker 1: speak to you through E groups in this season of
Speaker 1: your life. We are not waiting for a virus to
Speaker 1: go away, to have church. We are the church. The
Speaker 1: church is not a building. The church is just a
Speaker 1: group of imperfect people coming together on a journey of faith.
Speaker 1: And we're not waiting until we can pack out a building.
Speaker 1: We're going to pack out homes and we're gonna pack
Speaker 1: out zoom. We have over one thousand groups signed up
Speaker 1: to do this study because you were not meant to
Speaker 1: go through life alone. So that's my commercial. Don't miss
Speaker 1: out on this opportunities. Only five weeks, we have the
Speaker 1: perfect group for you. Go to philippianstudy dot com to
Speaker 1: find out more. But don't go right now because I
Speaker 1: have a message that I want to bring to you
Speaker 1: that I'm really really excited on because God has laid
Speaker 1: this one on my heart. Actually, it sparked in my
Speaker 1: heart years ago while I was leading any group for
Speaker 1: married women. I was teaching and we were studying, and
Speaker 1: I came across this verse in the Bible that said
Speaker 1: that wives could win their husbands over without words. And
Speaker 1: I was so intrigued by this idea of winning someone
Speaker 1: over without words because I love words. If you know me,
Speaker 1: I am a very talkative person. Now, don't ask me
Speaker 1: how my weekend was unless you really want to hear
Speaker 1: every detail of the sleepover that we had this past
Speaker 1: weekend for Graham's thirteenth birthday, and how I had middle
Speaker 1: school boys and they're dirty socks and all over my house.
Speaker 1: I can't help it. I like stories, I like description.
Speaker 1: I just I like talking. I've been this way my
Speaker 1: whole life. One of the nicest things that anybody ever
Speaker 1: said to me was I was in the middle of
Speaker 1: telling a story and they said, Holly, this story is
Speaker 1: so good, do not leave one detail out. Tell me everything.
Speaker 1: And I was like, I love you, You're my best friend.
Speaker 1: Here we go. Someone actually said that to me. Now
Speaker 1: sometimes I say that to other people because I don't know.
Speaker 1: Maybe doesn't mean that much people, but I love it.
Speaker 1: People have been telling me to stop talking my entire life.
Speaker 1: When I was a child, on my report card, there
Speaker 1: was this common theme. When I was a kid, the
Speaker 1: teachers actually hand wrote our report cards, and on the
Speaker 1: back of it there were these little boxes where they
Speaker 1: could leave some personal thoughts and comments, and there was
Speaker 1: a theme all throughout my childhood that said something like this,
Speaker 1: Holly is a bright child who would do better to
Speaker 1: talk less. I can't help it. I'm a woman of
Speaker 1: many words. And you know, actually sometimes this comes in
Speaker 1: handy when you have to talk to thousands of people
Speaker 1: from a practically empty room, right, But in normal settings,
Speaker 1: I have had to really learn how to rain this in.
Speaker 1: And one of the greatest lessons that I have had
Speaker 1: to learn in the area of being an over talker
Speaker 1: is that you don't have to say everything you think.
Speaker 1: This is really hard for me. I know it's not mean.
Speaker 1: Some of you may be better at this, but I've
Speaker 1: really had to learn this lesson the hard way. One
Speaker 1: time when we were in college. I know my husband's
Speaker 1: told you how we traveled on a ministry team in
Speaker 1: this van in the summertime, and we traveled all through
Speaker 1: these small towns in South Carolina. And one particular day,
Speaker 1: we were driving through this really small town and I
Speaker 1: just blurted out, this town is really trashy looking. I
Speaker 1: would hate to live here. And the girl behind me
Speaker 1: and the seat behind me, she just quietly said she
Speaker 1: was like, my whole family's from this town. I was like, oh,
Speaker 1: can I get this shoe emoji in the chat? If
Speaker 1: you're like me and you put your foot in your mouth,
Speaker 1: it's time or two or three or four in your life.
Speaker 1: I just I talk too much. I talk when I
Speaker 1: get excited. I talk when I'm nervous. Sometimes I talk
Speaker 1: because I'm bored. Sometimes I talk because I'm uncomfortable. I'm
Speaker 1: uncomfortable with silence. Actually, I just I don't I don't
Speaker 1: like silence, and so I just will. If you don't talk,
Speaker 1: I'm gonna talk. And if I'm by myself, I even
Speaker 1: have my aarpods in with an audiobook playing because somebody
Speaker 1: needs to be talking. I talk too much my whole life.
Speaker 1: I have been trying to learn how to shut my
Speaker 1: mouth and think before I talk. Is there anyone out
Speaker 1: there who can relate to me? Please let me know
Speaker 1: that I'm not alone. I know that no one likes
Speaker 1: to be around someone who just dominates every space with
Speaker 1: the sound of their voice. And I'm trying to fix that. Okay,
Speaker 1: I'm working on it. The Bible actually has a lot
Speaker 1: to say about talkers. Proverbs eighteen twenty one says the
Speaker 1: power of life and death is in the tongue. The
Speaker 1: psalmist prayed for God to put a guard over his
Speaker 1: mouth and James one of my favorite Bible verses, well,
Speaker 1: I wouldn't say favorite, but one that I've really had
Speaker 1: to tell myself over and over again. He says, be
Speaker 1: quick to listen and slow to speak. And I think
Speaker 1: all of us, no matter how talkative we are, have
Speaker 1: experienced these moments where we realize the power of our words.
Speaker 1: Have you ever said something that you realize hurts someone deeply?
Speaker 1: Maybe unintentional, and it's not always a direct insult. I
Speaker 1: know we all have a time that we can remember
Speaker 1: when somebody directly insulted us, Like you know, I don't know.
Speaker 1: Lots of people have a story where their father said
Speaker 1: You're never gonna amount to anything. Yeah, we all have
Speaker 1: times like that. But a lot of times we can
Speaker 1: hurt those that we love also with what we don't say,
Speaker 1: or or the thing the ways that we don't encourage them.
Speaker 1: I remember one particular time several years ago, and my
Speaker 1: husband's first book was finally finished, and they mailed a
Speaker 1: case of the books to our house, and I remember
Speaker 1: walking into the room and seeing this big box and
Speaker 1: Stephen was there. He just cut it open and he
Speaker 1: reached out and he pulled out a copy of Son
Speaker 1: Stands Still by Steven Ferdick, and I picked up the
Speaker 1: book and I fanned through it and I said, really,
Speaker 1: big huh? And I saw my husband's shoulders visibly droop,
Speaker 1: and I was like, oh God, oh no, Can I
Speaker 1: get a rewind? I mean, it's amazing. Can I get
Speaker 1: a do over? Because as I thought, that's not what
Speaker 1: I meant to say, I realized that I had spent
Speaker 1: the last eighteen months watching this man agonize over every
Speaker 1: word that was in that book. He went through revision
Speaker 1: after revision, He changed the cover ten times. This was
Speaker 1: his first book, This was his story. Did I say,
Speaker 1: my man, you're a published author. Nope. Did I say
Speaker 1: this book is gonna change people's lives? Nope? I just
Speaker 1: said the first thing that popped into my head. The
Speaker 1: font's kind of big huh hustle. Words hold weight, and
Speaker 1: what you choose to say and what you whoose not
Speaker 1: to say is important. That's why we have to learn
Speaker 1: to pay attention to everything that comes out of our mouths.
Speaker 1: Can we talk about this today? We are living in
Speaker 1: a time where people do not consider the weight of
Speaker 1: their words. Now, some of us may be better at
Speaker 1: not saying everything that we think, but what about typing
Speaker 1: Our thumbs can sometimes cause more damage than our tongue.
Speaker 1: Solomon wrote the power of life and death is in
Speaker 1: the tongue, But I wonder if he'd lived in twenty twenty,
Speaker 1: he might have said, the power of life and death
Speaker 1: is in the thumbs. There is so much noise going
Speaker 1: on in the world today, and it is hard to
Speaker 1: separate the truth from the fiction. It's hard to know
Speaker 1: when you have a feed coming through, and now we
Speaker 1: all know that our feed is just feeding us what
Speaker 1: we want to be fed. And it's so hard to
Speaker 1: even have a voice when it feels like everyone is
Speaker 1: just shouting at each other are and not listening at all.
Speaker 1: I want to learn how to be part of the
Speaker 1: solution to the things that are going on around me,
Speaker 1: not just another person who's just adding to the noise.
Speaker 1: So today, since our groups are kicking off a study,
Speaker 1: remember you're going to join run Philippianstudy dot com. It's
Speaker 1: not too late. I wanted to preach from Paul's words
Speaker 1: as well. God has been speaking to me so much
Speaker 1: about this topic and I'm just really excited to bring
Speaker 1: it to you today. So as we open up God's word,
Speaker 1: I just want us to all say a prayer together
Speaker 1: out loud, so you don't have to close your eyes.
Speaker 1: We'll just all collectively. If you're in your living room
Speaker 1: or in your car, it's okay, out loud, let's all
Speaker 1: say this. Lord, speak to me. I am listening. Amen.
Speaker 1: All right. If you have a Bible, look with me.
Speaker 1: At Philippians, chapter two, verse fourteen. Because Paul has so
Speaker 1: much that he is going to teach us about our words.
Speaker 1: Says this, do everything without grumbling or arguing, so that
Speaker 1: you may become blameless and pure children of God, without
Speaker 1: fault in a warped and crooked generation. Then you will
Speaker 1: shine among them like stars in the sky as you
Speaker 1: hold firmly to the word of life. Do everything without
Speaker 1: grumbling or arguing, then you will shine. If you're looking,
Speaker 1: if you're sitting with someone, I want you to look
Speaker 1: at them. Tell them my sermon title say this, shut
Speaker 1: up and shine. Go ahead and put that in the chat.
Speaker 1: Don't worry. It comes right from the Bible. It's okay
Speaker 1: to say shut up, shut up, and shine. So on
Speaker 1: the surface here it looks like Paul is giving us
Speaker 1: a pretty impossible command with the promise, But it's a
Speaker 1: promise that we're never going to achieve because out in
Speaker 1: the world are we supposed to do everything without grumbling
Speaker 1: or arguing. But if you dig into this, these three
Speaker 1: small verses, I want to show you that Paul is
Speaker 1: trying to teach us that how the things that he's
Speaker 1: trying to teach just how the things that you do
Speaker 1: not say can sometimes have just as much power as
Speaker 1: the things that you do say. He's giving us if
Speaker 1: you look back at it, he's giving us two things
Speaker 1: to not do and two things to do. So he
Speaker 1: begins by telling us to do everything without grumbling or arguing.
Speaker 1: Maybe you're like me and you read it and you're like, yeah,
Speaker 1: that's not going to happen. Everything like zero tolerance policy.
Speaker 1: This is gonna be hard because sometimes complaining is really
Speaker 1: fun and sometimes arguing is just necessary. Of some of
Speaker 1: the married people, give me an amen and the chat.
Speaker 1: When you read the Bible, though, it's important to understand
Speaker 1: who is writing these words, and where was he when
Speaker 1: he wrote them, and who was he writing them to,
Speaker 1: because when you put all of that together, the words
Speaker 1: become more than just commands of dues and don'ts and
Speaker 1: this and that. They have context and they come alive.
Speaker 1: And the Book of Philippians is a letter written by
Speaker 1: Paul to the people at the Church of Philippi, a
Speaker 1: church that he planted, and a lot of scholars believe,
Speaker 1: based on Paul's words and his tone, that the people
Speaker 1: of the Church of Philippi, they were Paul's secret favorites.
Speaker 1: These were his true friends, the people that he considered
Speaker 1: almost like family, because these people supported him as he
Speaker 1: traveled around and as he ministered and started churches all over.
Speaker 1: And now he's found himself in a Roman prison and
Speaker 1: the Philippians have just sent him a good old fashioned
Speaker 1: care basket and a love offering, and so he's sending
Speaker 1: them back a letter. And not only is he giving
Speaker 1: them words and an update on how things are going,
Speaker 1: but he's living out what he's saying to them from
Speaker 1: a prison cell. And really he's warning them. He's saying
Speaker 1: in a way that you have to to approach a
Speaker 1: difficult circumstance, the way to approach it is not to complain,
Speaker 1: and the way to have lasting arguments is not to argue.
Speaker 1: Complaining and arguing are our default responses, but they can
Speaker 1: be extremely counterproductive in our lives. You see, complaining rarely
Speaker 1: improves my circumstances. Now, obviously there are times when it's
Speaker 1: right to make a complaint, Like I have a friend
Speaker 1: who hates to bother her landlord, Like if she has
Speaker 1: a leak or something's broken, she doesn't want to bother her.
Speaker 1: And I'm like, that's like the one perk of renting.
Speaker 1: You don't have to fix stuff. It's okay to complain
Speaker 1: to your landlord. But someone once gave me a rule
Speaker 1: of thumb, and it's this, never complain about a situation
Speaker 1: to a person who's powerless to change it. The kind
Speaker 1: of complaining that Paul is talking about here is the
Speaker 1: kind that keeps us stuck blaming something that's outside of
Speaker 1: our control. Have you ever tried to keep track of
Speaker 1: every time you complain? If you've been through missus better half,
Speaker 1: you've done this because we have this one week where
Speaker 1: we try to see how much negativity and how much
Speaker 1: complaining that we're putting out into the world. And I
Speaker 1: stole this little challenge from a book that I had
Speaker 1: read and because it meant so much to me. And
Speaker 1: you wear a little bracelet or a hair tie or
Speaker 1: whatever on your wrist, and every time you catch yourself complaining,
Speaker 1: you switch the bracelet over to the other hand. And
Speaker 1: every time that I do this challenge, which I've done
Speaker 1: it a lot, because I've taught many many rounds of
Speaker 1: missus better half. I keep thinking, maybe I'm going to
Speaker 1: be better at it this time, maybe I'll have complain less.
Speaker 1: But I always just amazed at how much I complain
Speaker 1: and I don't even realize. And by the end of
Speaker 1: the challenge, my bracelet is falling apart, and I'm starting
Speaker 1: to like punish myself because I'm so mad at them.
Speaker 1: My wrist is red. We say things all day long
Speaker 1: that we're not even aware of. Can you help me
Speaker 1: out if I'm my alone out here? Okay, let me
Speaker 1: know in the chat if you have said in the
Speaker 1: last twenty four hours any of the following things, just
Speaker 1: you know, give me the little hand raising emoji. All right,
Speaker 1: I'm tired. I hate the car line at school, or
Speaker 1: some of you are like, I wish I missed the
Speaker 1: car line at school. Or did you say wearing a
Speaker 1: mask is so uncomfortable, or it's so hot, or it's
Speaker 1: so cold, or what an ugly day? My back hurts,
Speaker 1: I have nothing to wear, there's nothing to eat. Why
Speaker 1: doesn't anyone listen to me in this house? This I
Speaker 1: think I said all of those this week. Sometimes I
Speaker 1: can get really creative with my complaints too. I can
Speaker 1: dress them up, make them all nice and cute, say
Speaker 1: something like I just I wish I had more time,
Speaker 1: or it must be young to be able to eat
Speaker 1: whatever you want, or maybe some of you have said
Speaker 1: this one this week? When is fall going to get here? Right?
Speaker 1: Sometimes I'll take my complaints and I'll focus them on
Speaker 1: another person. I might say something like I just I
Speaker 1: wish my friend would call me more, or I wish
Speaker 1: my kids were more respectful. I found that as I
Speaker 1: have identified my complaints, they didn't really It didn't really
Speaker 1: make me feel better. I felt increasingly worse about my situation.
Speaker 1: Like when I wish that my kids were more respectful,
Speaker 1: it actually happened because one of them had a friend
Speaker 1: over and the friend was all like, yes, ma'am, and
Speaker 1: missus verdick, where's the garbage can? I don't even think
Speaker 1: my own kids know where the garbage can is in
Speaker 1: my house, And so I'm like, I wish my kids
Speaker 1: were like that, you know, And now I'm like, God,
Speaker 1: I'm a terrible mom. It's my own fault. I mean,
Speaker 1: I'm their mother. I pick up their trash and don't.
Speaker 1: And so it started as wishing that a person in
Speaker 1: my life was different turned in to making myself out
Speaker 1: to be a bad mother, because complaining will spiral out
Speaker 1: of control so fast, and on the surface, it just
Speaker 1: seems like a statement of the fact. But now my
Speaker 1: focus is on the negative, and so is everyone else's
Speaker 1: that's around me. And it's so easy to identify complaining
Speaker 1: in others. It's so easy to be like, yeah, my
Speaker 1: husband needs to stop complaining, but it's harder to see
Speaker 1: it when I'm the one that's doing it. Oh, I'm
Speaker 1: not complaining, I'm reviewing. I'm not saying that reviews aren't helpful.
Speaker 1: Actually they aren't helpful because usually the only people who
Speaker 1: review products are the people who aren't happy with the product. Like,
Speaker 1: if you're happy with the product, you're not gonna go
Speaker 1: back and te ipe out a review. We live in
Speaker 1: a world, though, where people actually consider themselves professional complainers,
Speaker 1: professional yelpers. This is so messed up because negativity slows
Speaker 1: down your progress, it diverts your attention. And Paul is
Speaker 1: warning us that complaining is a slippery slope that can
Speaker 1: distract us from the things that we can actually control
Speaker 1: in our lives, like my attitude. I can control my attitude.
Speaker 1: But watch how Paul doesn't only give us a command,
Speaker 1: but he gives he leads the way. He gives us
Speaker 1: an example, back in chapter one, Paul says this verse
Speaker 1: twelve Philippians one, verse twelve. Now, I want you to know,
Speaker 1: brothers and sisters, that what has happened to me has
Speaker 1: actually served to advance the Gospel. As a result, it
Speaker 1: has become clear throughout the whole palace guard and to
Speaker 1: everyone else that I am in chains for Christ. And
Speaker 1: because of my chains, most of the brothers and sisters
Speaker 1: have become confident in the Lord and dare all the
Speaker 1: more to proclaim the Gospel without fear. It blows my
Speaker 1: mind that nowhere in the Book of Philippians will you
Speaker 1: find Paul describing his prison conditions. Nowhere does he say
Speaker 1: it's cold, I'm hungry, they're terrible. I got whipped the
Speaker 1: other day. He never even asks the Philippians to pray
Speaker 1: for his release. He says, I must be in change
Speaker 1: for Christ, because revival is breaking out inside of my prison,
Speaker 1: and revival can break out wherever you are if you
Speaker 1: change your perspective Paul gives us throughout the book. He
Speaker 1: weaves in the antidote to complaining, and you know what
Speaker 1: that is, rejoice. Sixteen times in the Book of Philippians,
Speaker 1: Paul uses the word joy or rejoice. He says it
Speaker 1: over and over again again. I will say rejoice, rejoicing
Speaker 1: the Lord. Always again I will say rejoice. And if
Speaker 1: Paul can look for the opportunity in a hard place,
Speaker 1: so can I. The minute that I catch myself complaining,
Speaker 1: I've gotta flip it. I have got to find something
Speaker 1: to rejoice about. So now I'm gonna use my over
Speaker 1: talking for my own benefit. If I'm gonna if I'm
Speaker 1: gonna talk, I'm gonna talk about the good things. I'm
Speaker 1: gonna find something. I'm gonna call myself back to joy
Speaker 1: over and over and over again. I'm not complaining. I'm
Speaker 1: just saying, well, you know what, if you're just saying,
Speaker 1: if what you're just saying is keeping you stucked, and
Speaker 1: you should probably stop saying. Stop saying I wish our
Speaker 1: kids were young again. Stop saying I wish we had
Speaker 1: more money. Stop saying this house is too small, Stop
Speaker 1: saying it is what it is. No you know the
Speaker 1: Israelites spent so much of the focused complaining about the
Speaker 1: wilderness and wishing that they were back in Egypt, that
Speaker 1: they missed out on the promise that was right in
Speaker 1: front of them. So Paul warns us he's got two things,
Speaker 1: complaining and arguing, because complaining keeps me suck in my circumstances,
Speaker 1: and arguing keeps me from experiencing true connection with those
Speaker 1: that I love. Can I find another honest person in
Speaker 1: the chat? I'm saying that a lot today because I
Speaker 1: just I'm kind of burying my soul and I want
Speaker 1: to make sure that I'm not alone. But am I alone?
Speaker 1: Am I the only person that likes to have the
Speaker 1: last word? Sometimes I feel like I have multiple personalities
Speaker 1: because on one hand, I'm a total people pleaser, like
Speaker 1: I will go to great links to avoid conflict. But
Speaker 1: then there are a few people and a few topics,
Speaker 1: then well if you I'm just gonna put my boxing
Speaker 1: gloves on. And my husband is looking at me right
Speaker 1: now because he knows that I have this one particular trigger,
Speaker 1: Like you can talk about politics, you can talk about policies,
Speaker 1: you can talk about theology, and I will cool as
Speaker 1: a cucumber. But if you bring up this one topic
Speaker 1: and I'm not gonna tell you what it is, because
Speaker 1: I'll just go off. It's kind of a hot topic anyway,
Speaker 1: and probably shouldn't say it on camera, But I'm just saying,
Speaker 1: there's just there's certain topics that I can't not argue about,
Speaker 1: and then there's certain people. Lord knows, the three of
Speaker 1: my favorite people on the planet are Elijah, Graham, and Abby.
Speaker 1: But those three people, they are professional button pushers, and
Speaker 1: I will stoop to their level and I will argue
Speaker 1: with them, and I will lose my cool, and I
Speaker 1: will keep going and going and going because I am
Speaker 1: the adult and therefore I have the last word. The
Speaker 1: problem is that when I keep doing that, I'm not
Speaker 1: actually proving my authority to them. I'm more compromising, and
Speaker 1: I'm down on their level. And any time that we
Speaker 1: need to win an argument with another person, we compromise
Speaker 1: the relationship somehow. So what I'm learning is that if
Speaker 1: my goal is purely to win, I lose. Well. I
Speaker 1: may win the argument, I may walk away feeling proud
Speaker 1: I was right I put them in their place, but
Speaker 1: I have no concern for how the other person feels,
Speaker 1: and in the process of me winning, I've lost a
Speaker 1: small piece of the relationship that I have, and over time,
Speaker 1: piece by piece, I chip away at the opportunity to
Speaker 1: have a right relationship with a person in my life
Speaker 1: that I love. See, when you argue with an attacking stance,
Speaker 1: you automatically put the other person in a defensive position.
Speaker 1: And when someone is defending, they're most likely not even
Speaker 1: hearing a word that you say because they are in
Speaker 1: protection mode. They're in defense mode. James said, Remember, be
Speaker 1: quick to listen, slow to speak. This means that while
Speaker 1: the other person is talking, I am paying attention to
Speaker 1: what they're saying. I'm not planning what I'm going to
Speaker 1: say next. I'm actually seeking to understand. I'm not just
Speaker 1: airing out my own opinions. And then when I do speak,
Speaker 1: when it's my turn to speak, I choose words that
Speaker 1: are not abrasive or accusing. I told you that I
Speaker 1: have put my foot in my mouth way too many
Speaker 1: times to count, and so years ago I came across
Speaker 1: this verse and immediately put it to memory. It meant
Speaker 1: so much to me. It's Colossians four to six, and
Speaker 1: it says, let your conversation. Always be full of grace,
Speaker 1: seasoned with salt, so that you may know how to
Speaker 1: answer everyone. This verse is talking about how to defend
Speaker 1: the gospel to those who don't believe in Yes, we
Speaker 1: absolutely need to be passionate about the Gospel and the
Speaker 1: values that we have as believers in Christ. But if
Speaker 1: you come out the gate accusing and demeaning and come
Speaker 1: across like you are the enlightened one, you're never going
Speaker 1: to win anyone over. Put a little salt on those words.
Speaker 1: Let the person know that you love them and that
Speaker 1: you hear them, and that you're listening to their side.
Speaker 1: If you are, if you do. Our pastor teaches us
Speaker 1: this all the time. I mean, God, he has been
Speaker 1: on fire the last few weeks, like absolutely. I told
Speaker 1: him that his message last week is in the top three,
Speaker 1: my top three messages of all times. Never ever in
Speaker 1: twenty years of marriage have I suggested that he preach
Speaker 1: on a passage of scripture. And he actually did until
Speaker 1: last week. So that was a win for me, and
Speaker 1: I got my own personal sermon. If you miss it,
Speaker 1: you have to go back and watch it, because that's
Speaker 1: not my point. My point is that the last several
Speaker 1: sermons that he have preached have been sent around this
Speaker 1: idea about the questions that Jesus asked, and he told
Speaker 1: us that everything begins with a question, and buried deep
Speaker 1: in my notes, as I was flipping through, I came
Speaker 1: across this one line that I had written, where he
Speaker 1: said questions create access. Questions create access, but accusations close hearts.
Speaker 1: If we're going to be quick to listen and slow
Speaker 1: to speak, we must learn how to ask questions, and
Speaker 1: we have to ask good questions. For instance, what are
Speaker 1: you thinking? That's not a good question Just because it
Speaker 1: has a little punctuation mark doesn't mean that it works,
Speaker 1: because you might as well tack on the word idiot
Speaker 1: to that. What were you thinking? You idiot? But if
Speaker 1: you say something like can you help me understand? It
Speaker 1: communicates care, It communicates concern. It says I want to
Speaker 1: hear what you have to say, and I care more
Speaker 1: about us than I do about making my point. And
Speaker 1: Paul models this again for us back in chapter one.
Speaker 1: Let's see. He says, if you go to Philpy chapter one,
Speaker 1: verse seventeen, he's talking about the people who were preaching
Speaker 1: Christ for selfish gain, and he doesn't go around crusading
Speaker 1: after them and putting them all in their places. I
Speaker 1: want you to look at what he says. This is
Speaker 1: verse seventeen. Preached Christ out of selfish ambition, not sincerely
Speaker 1: supposing that they can stir up trouble for me while
Speaker 1: I am in chains. But what does it matter? In
Speaker 1: every way, whether from false motives or true, Christ is preached.
Speaker 1: And because of this I rejoice. There are times where
Speaker 1: I have to ask myself does this really matter? Is
Speaker 1: this argument worth the damage that it might have on
Speaker 1: our relationship? And can I have the humility to let
Speaker 1: it go? In those moments, I have to learn to
Speaker 1: take a second and think, quick to listen, slow to speak.
Speaker 1: And did you notice what Paul did? He called himself
Speaker 1: back to joy. He said, I'm going to fix my
Speaker 1: focus on the things that do matter. And what matters
Speaker 1: is that Christ is being preached. What matters is the person,
Speaker 1: not my point if the person matters to you, because
Speaker 1: the world does not need another opinion, but the world
Speaker 1: desperately needs some better examples. Paul says, do everything without
Speaker 1: grumbling or arguing, so that you may be become blameless
Speaker 1: and pure children of God. Without fault and a warped
Speaker 1: and crooked generation. Then you will shine among them like
Speaker 1: stars in the sky as you hold firmly to the
Speaker 1: word of life. Crooked means bent in the wrong direction.
Speaker 1: But the way to redirect someone is not to shout,
Speaker 1: it's to shine. See I'm a talkative person. But not
Speaker 1: only am I a talkative person, I'm also a really
Speaker 1: loud talker. Again, this kind of comes in handy in
Speaker 1: this sort of setting, but in day to day it
Speaker 1: can be really annoying. I don't know why I'm allowed talker.
Speaker 1: Maybe it's because I'm a middle child and I wanted
Speaker 1: to be heard in my family. Maybe it's because I
Speaker 1: have I actually do have a sister who's hearing impaired,
Speaker 1: and maybe my whole family talks loud. I don't know.
Speaker 1: I don't know why, and I don't even realize it.
Speaker 1: Sometimes I have an out of body experience where I'm like,
Speaker 1: oh God, I'm yelling at this person and they're standing
Speaker 1: right in front of me. The thing that I'm learning, though,
Speaker 1: is that my life speaks louder than my voice ever can.
Speaker 1: When Paul says you will shine like stars in the sky,
Speaker 1: he's referring to a prophecy from the Book of Daniel.
Speaker 1: Somebody sent me this card this summer and they wrote
Speaker 1: this Bible verse on it, and I liked it because
Speaker 1: we do talk about shining like stars and missus better
Speaker 1: half as well. And so I put it up on
Speaker 1: my desk, and I was sitting at my desk working
Speaker 1: and I looked up and I read this verse. I
Speaker 1: want to read it to you. It's in Daniel chapter twelve,
Speaker 1: verse three. Those who are wise will shine like the
Speaker 1: brightness of the heavens, and those who lead many to
Speaker 1: righteousness like the stars forever and ever. Daniel was amongst
Speaker 1: a people who did not worship God, and it was
Speaker 1: the life that he lived that impacted an entire nation.
Speaker 1: Remember he's the one that knelt to pray every day,
Speaker 1: even though the king had made an order prohibiting prayer.
Speaker 1: It was his actions that made an impact, not his words.
Speaker 1: Have you ever watched a friend go through something, maybe
Speaker 1: a divorce or an illness, or maybe watch them try
Speaker 1: to navigate a difficult situation with their child. We all
Speaker 1: experience difficult situations that we didn't expect that come up
Speaker 1: along the way. But have you ever watched someone just
Speaker 1: absolutely shine under the hardest circumstances. My friends, she had
Speaker 1: one of the most horrific years last year. I mean
Speaker 1: we joke about twenty twenty, but she lost her job,
Speaker 1: she had to move across the country, away from her
Speaker 1: home where she had lived for almost forty years, and
Speaker 1: try to rebuild her life. And then about a month
Speaker 1: after moving, she was diagnosed with stage three breast cancer.
Speaker 1: And every time we talked, she was just she was real.
Speaker 1: She would tell me how she was scared. She was
Speaker 1: obviously alone in the way that she felt she was
Speaker 1: physically alone because her family was so far away, But
Speaker 1: somehow she would just always bring the conversation back to
Speaker 1: all the ways that God was working. And one day,
Speaker 1: through tears, she said, Holly, I know that God has this.
Speaker 1: I know that I'm going to get through it. Everywhere
Speaker 1: I go I see glimpses of him. Scott spoke to
Speaker 1: me today through the lady who checks me out at CBS.
Speaker 1: I just know I'm gonna make it to the other
Speaker 1: side of this. Then you will shine among them like
Speaker 1: stars in the sky as you hold fast to the
Speaker 1: word of life. How do you shine? How do we
Speaker 1: do this? Well? One you refuse to dwell on the
Speaker 1: negative and you let go of the need to be right,
Speaker 1: and then you hold firm to the word of life.
Speaker 1: What is God speaking to you in this season? Maybe
Speaker 1: you have no idea, You're like, I don't know. Okay,
Speaker 1: Well go back. Think what was the last thing that
Speaker 1: God spoke to you. Maybe he whispered very softly to
Speaker 1: you about your attitude at work. Maybe it was something
Speaker 1: that had to do with doing things for others without
Speaker 1: having to be noticed. Maybe it was about focusing on
Speaker 1: all the things that you have to be grateful for
Speaker 1: in a season where things just really aren't turning out
Speaker 1: the way that you think. Maybe, like Daniel, he just
Speaker 1: called you to spend time praying every day. And sometimes
Speaker 1: what we miss is that the best way to impact
Speaker 1: the people around you is to make a change in
Speaker 1: yourself in life. The most difficult lesson of all for
Speaker 1: me has been to understand that at the end of
Speaker 1: the day, the only person that I can really change
Speaker 1: is me. But it's not fun to change me. It's
Speaker 1: easier to try and change others and hope that when
Speaker 1: others change, my life will improve. Right. But when I focus,
Speaker 1: when I place my focus on all the things that
Speaker 1: everyone else needs to change. What happens is I become
Speaker 1: someone I don't want to be. I become a nagging
Speaker 1: and manipulative woman, and then sometimes I give up on
Speaker 1: the nagging in the manipulation that I just become stubborn
Speaker 1: and withdrawn. And then I wonder why I'm never really
Speaker 1: making any progress in my relationships or in my personal life,
Speaker 1: because when I blame others' actions for my problems, I
Speaker 1: can never experience real change in my life. I love
Speaker 1: to tell this story about Graham and Abby. Years ago.
Speaker 1: I asked them to go pack their lunches. It was
Speaker 1: the school night, and in our house, pack your lunch
Speaker 1: means grab a juice box and a lunch box and
Speaker 1: get some prepackaged snacks and then bring it to me
Speaker 1: and I'll put your sandwich in it. Okay, So no
Speaker 1: little beautiful little binto boxes or anything like that. So
Speaker 1: on this particular night, I said, Graham and Abby go
Speaker 1: fix your lunch, and I hear Graham yelling at Abby, Abby,
Speaker 1: pack your lunch, Abby, Mom said, pack your lunch. Abby,
Speaker 1: You need to do it. Mom said, I just went
Speaker 1: on and on, and the kids have like the most
Speaker 1: incredible amount of patience and saying something over and over again,
Speaker 1: while I got tired of it, and I said, Graham,
Speaker 1: come here, come into the kitchen, and he comes in
Speaker 1: empty handed. He's a buddy, where's your lunch? And he goes, Oh,
Speaker 1: I forgot. Graham was so busy picking a fight with
Speaker 1: his sister and telling her what she needed to do,
Speaker 1: that he neglected to pack his own lunch. And what
Speaker 1: I want to tell you today is pack your own lunch.
Speaker 1: You determined to be kind no matter how you're treated.
Speaker 1: You'd be the first one to apologize, even if you
Speaker 1: were only ten percent wrong, which you probably weren't ten
Speaker 1: percent wrong, but you'll be the first one to say
Speaker 1: I'm sorry. What does it matter? You determine that I'm
Speaker 1: gonna bow out of a conversation if it gets ugly somehow,
Speaker 1: I'm gonna get out of there. I'm not gonna I'm
Speaker 1: not gonna go there talking about other people. You be
Speaker 1: generous with your time and your money, rich, expecting nothing
Speaker 1: in return, because God has the work that he wants
Speaker 1: to do in you. And if you say hyper focused
Speaker 1: on others and how they need to change and what
Speaker 1: they need to do, you might end up complaining that
Speaker 1: you don't have any lunch, You're gonna be hungry. Sometimes,
Speaker 1: the greatest impact that you will have on the people
Speaker 1: of your life will not be with the words that
Speaker 1: you say. It will be with the life that you live.
Speaker 1: So can we just collectively all decide stop shouting at
Speaker 1: each other and just start shining brighter. I'm not saying
Speaker 1: that we can't be a voice for the voiceless. I'm
Speaker 1: not saying that we don't speak up against injustice. I'm
Speaker 1: just pointing out first John three eighteen. I learned this
Speaker 1: verse when I was a little girl. There was a song.
Speaker 1: I'm not going to sing the song, but it says this,
Speaker 1: let us not love with words or speech, but with
Speaker 1: actions and in truth. I told you that last week's
Speaker 1: sermon was in my top three Stievelfredick sermons of all times.
Speaker 1: And if you miss it, it's called Just the Two
Speaker 1: of Us, you have to go back and watch it.
Speaker 1: But he preached about the Shunamite woman. So I'm hoping
Speaker 1: the most of you heard it, because the Shunamite woman,
Speaker 1: she was the epitome of knowing how to keep her
Speaker 1: mouth shut and go to the one who could fix
Speaker 1: her son. There was only one person who could fix him.
Speaker 1: So you remember, the child died and she placed him
Speaker 1: on the bed, the prophet's bed that was in her home,
Speaker 1: and she set out to find Elisha. And she did
Speaker 1: not waste time arguing with her husband about how he
Speaker 1: should have brought the boy to her sooner, and this
Speaker 1: was his fault. She did not knock on her neighbor's
Speaker 1: door and request prayer. When Elisha's servant came out to
Speaker 1: her and he asked her if everything was all right,
Speaker 1: she did not complain to him. She said, I'm fine,
Speaker 1: everything's fine, and she kept going where she knew she
Speaker 1: needed to be. But when she reached the prophet, the
Speaker 1: verse says that she actually knelt down, and it says
Speaker 1: she took hold of his feet, and she poured out
Speaker 1: her soul to him, to let go of what you
Speaker 1: cannot fix, and you hold firm to what you know,
Speaker 1: then you will shine among them like stars in the sky,
Speaker 1: as you hold firmly to the word of life. She
Speaker 1: knew that she had to get to the one who
Speaker 1: had spoken life to her. Beautiful. He said, you're gonna
Speaker 1: have a son, and that was the promise that she
Speaker 1: was clinging to He said, I was gonna have the sun,
Speaker 1: so he did this, so he's the only one that
Speaker 1: can fix it. She was quiet when it came to
Speaker 1: speaking to others, but when she got in the presence
Speaker 1: of the Prophet, she poured out her soul to him,
Speaker 1: and she i refused to leave his presence because when
Speaker 1: you go to the source, you're never alone in your problem,
Speaker 1: no matter how lonely you feel. So she stuck with them,
Speaker 1: and as they journeyed back to her home, she stayed close.
Speaker 1: And when they got back to her house, the Prophet
Speaker 1: went into the room with her child and shut the door.
Speaker 1: I like to think about how she thought she was
Speaker 1: going to go in with him and he shut the door.
Speaker 1: And when my husband said that sometimes you have to
Speaker 1: stand outside the door while God goes in with your problems,
Speaker 1: I knew that that was a picture that I would
Speaker 1: never forget because I don't know about you, but I've
Speaker 1: had a few times in my life. I've had enough
Speaker 1: times in my life where I've had to stand outside
Speaker 1: the door and just like God handle my situation. And
Speaker 1: she stood there. She was quiet, and she was alone
Speaker 1: because sometimes the things that you go through, they're just
Speaker 1: they're too personal to share in the moment. And so
Speaker 1: she just stood there while the prophet was behind the
Speaker 1: door with her child. And I keep wondering what could
Speaker 1: have possibly been going through her mind, because as a woman,
Speaker 1: it's like, I can fix this, I need to fix this.
Speaker 1: But she couldn't fix it. She had to stand outside
Speaker 1: the door and wait and hold firm to the promise
Speaker 1: that God had given her. Because the thing that enables
Speaker 1: us to shine bright in the darkness, it's not only
Speaker 1: what we don't say, because that's a start, but it's
Speaker 1: what we cling to. You can cling to the promise
Speaker 1: that he will never leave you or forsake you. You
Speaker 1: can cling to the promise that the same Holy Spirit
Speaker 1: that lives inside of you, that he lives inside of
Speaker 1: the people that you love, and he's working on them,
Speaker 1: just like he's working on you. He's working on them.
Speaker 1: You can believe that if he speaks to you, he
Speaker 1: can speak to them without without your mouth, he can
Speaker 1: speak to them, and you can cling to that promise.
Speaker 1: I have a friend whose son is just doing everything
Speaker 1: that he wants to do right now, and she's clinging
Speaker 1: to the promise that God has given her about her son.
Speaker 1: You can cling to the promise that he sees every
Speaker 1: tear that you cry, and he hears every prayer that
Speaker 1: you pray, because he does, so you cling to that.
Speaker 1: You cling to the promise that you serve a God
Speaker 1: who really does turn everything for good. He does, He's
Speaker 1: done it before, he'll do it again. He really does
Speaker 1: turn graves into gardens. And the grave part is not fun,
Speaker 1: but the garden part you look back and can only
Speaker 1: have been God. And cling to that. And when you
Speaker 1: cling to that, your life will shine so bright that
Speaker 1: people can't help but see God glorified in your life. So, Lord,
Speaker 1: we just we open up our hands to you today.
Speaker 1: Pray for the person who's watching this alone. Just whisper
Speaker 1: to them, tell them that they're not pray for the
Speaker 1: person who has been praying for their child for years
Speaker 1: and years and years, because just speak to them. Tell
Speaker 1: them that you love their child more than they do.
Speaker 1: We cling to you today, which you reveal to us
Speaker 1: the things that we need to let go of, and
Speaker 1: then which you just remind us, like you do, of
Speaker 1: the promises that you have spoken over our lives. Your
Speaker 1: promises are good and precious. Your promises are yes and
Speaker 1: amen with buff you Lord, thank you saying Jesus name.
Speaker 1: I pray amen oooh that sermon. I know I'm biased,
Speaker 1: but I think what Holly just preached was the most
Speaker 1: relevant thing that she could have said. You know, we
Speaker 1: always talk about how hers and teaching is bringing the
Speaker 1: Word practically, but there was a prophetic element to that
Speaker 1: message today. And God gave her that message months ago,
Speaker 1: and I believe he wanted you to hear it right now.
Speaker 1: He wanted us to experience it together in this moment.
Speaker 1: So I pray you received it today, and I want
Speaker 1: to thank you. Thanks to all of you who support
Speaker 1: this incredible, worldwide, thriving ministry that is bearing fruit all
Speaker 1: over this planet. And the Bible says that we shouldn't
Speaker 1: just love in word, but indeed action. And some of
Speaker 1: you who who give financially and who pray and share
Speaker 1: the Gospel and serve, you're just You're the best. So
Speaker 1: thank you. I want to thank you for continuing in
Speaker 1: your generosity in this time. And I also wanted to
Speaker 1: encourage you to stay in touch. Those of you who
Speaker 1: attend a local elevation church, you know, check in with
Speaker 1: your campus pastor your campus team, make sure you're getting
Speaker 1: updates on in person worship experiences as more of those
Speaker 1: become a available hopefully in the days ahead, and for
Speaker 1: our EPM around the world, we're going to be right
Speaker 1: here for you every step of the way as we
Speaker 1: navigate this moment in time together. Well, you heard the word,
Speaker 1: and now I want to make sure that you're subscribed
Speaker 1: to the channel. Thank you for your partnership in the gospel.
Speaker 1: I love you.