WEBVTT - Finally! A Show About a Gender Equity Commissioner Going Back to School 0:00:02.400 --> 0:00:10.000 It's Monday, and it is officially the first day of school. 0:00:10.280 --> 0:00:14.320 I am excited a little more. 0:00:14.120 --> 0:00:19.920 Calm than I expect it to be, but extremely grateful 0:00:20.480 --> 0:00:26.240 for this opportunity to finish. 0:00:25.160 --> 0:00:32.000 A very necessary part of my career. And I'm excited 0:00:38.840 --> 0:00:41.880 this is finally a show about the first day of school. 0:00:42.200 --> 0:00:45.160 Jennifer was in the Atlanta ballroom scene. Wants to put 0:00:45.200 --> 0:00:54.680 it to law. So seventh grade, first day of seventh grade. 0:00:54.760 --> 0:00:57.840 I love my first days. Listen. First days are very 0:00:57.960 --> 0:00:59.720 very important to me. So when I got on the 0:00:59.720 --> 0:01:03.920 bun my cousin was on the bus and I think 0:01:03.960 --> 0:01:05.760 at that time she was dating a boy and so 0:01:05.920 --> 0:01:09.039 she was sitting with him, but she still let everybody know, 0:01:09.240 --> 0:01:12.840 like this is my cousin, blah blah blah blah. And 0:01:12.880 --> 0:01:15.000 I remember that was the first time people had CD 0:01:15.120 --> 0:01:19.720 players back then, so I had the headphones on I 0:01:19.800 --> 0:01:22.080 was listening. I was like, Oh, this is so cool, 0:01:22.319 --> 0:01:25.240 you know, I can zone out to music. Was kind 0:01:25.240 --> 0:01:30.560 of like my hideaway, like headphones and a CD player 0:01:30.880 --> 0:01:41.600 and batteries. I was good, correct, that's me. Today marks 0:01:41.760 --> 0:01:47.520 the beginning of what I would say is a completion 0:01:48.320 --> 0:01:55.240 of a degree. I've been pursuing bachelor specifically, professionally, I'm 0:01:55.240 --> 0:02:02.800 known as Jennifer Barnes, Palenciaga and Leek. I am missus 0:02:02.880 --> 0:02:07.280 Jennifer Lee McQueen, and I think for the beginning of 0:02:07.320 --> 0:02:13.000 school purposes, I am Jennifer Barnes simply. And we're riding 0:02:13.040 --> 0:02:17.800 through East Harlem right now, headed to Baroke College on 0:02:18.000 --> 0:02:23.760 a busy traffic field Monday. No better way I'd like 0:02:23.800 --> 0:02:30.200 to start off the week. I achieved my associates last 0:02:30.240 --> 0:02:34.760 semester and now I get to complete my bachelor's after. 0:02:35.960 --> 0:02:38.520 I guess this would be going into the eleventh year. 0:02:39.880 --> 0:02:45.680 So I'm excited and a lot of life experiences has 0:02:46.320 --> 0:02:50.200 brought this point to where it needed to be. Is 0:02:50.240 --> 0:02:52.600 there anything you did this morning to get yourself in 0:02:52.639 --> 0:02:58.280 the right headspace? So I listened to David Bowie's when 0:02:58.880 --> 0:03:03.040 I listened to Lenny Prafits, Black Girl, I listen to 0:03:03.080 --> 0:03:07.280 Paul Jackson New York. I listen to Pol Jacks and Bulldozer. 0:03:08.320 --> 0:03:12.160 I am a music person, so that helps me get ready. 0:03:13.919 --> 0:03:19.120 I am pursuing an undergraduate degree in political science and 0:03:19.240 --> 0:03:23.280 minoring in law. This would make me I think this 0:03:23.360 --> 0:03:26.640 is my beginning of my junior year, so end of 0:03:26.680 --> 0:03:29.440 sophomore beginning of junior is kind of where my placement 0:03:29.560 --> 0:03:35.240 is at this point within college. First class is Civil Liberties. 0:03:36.520 --> 0:03:40.680 From there, hopefully we can get something made somewhere around 0:03:40.680 --> 0:03:46.400 here and then go to the second class. Second class 0:03:46.960 --> 0:03:53.360 is European political systems, and the third is public policy. 0:03:53.520 --> 0:03:57.360 But that is on zoom Yep. They're all in the 0:03:57.360 --> 0:04:04.840 main building. Oh look, you can see the banners. We're 0:04:04.880 --> 0:04:11.960 almost here. Seventeen. My biggest hope for today is to 0:04:12.000 --> 0:04:14.040 have a great ID picture. 0:04:15.920 --> 0:04:16.360 Thank you. 0:04:34.200 --> 0:04:37.000 I was set. I was a set person. I knew 0:04:37.000 --> 0:04:42.000 who I was for a long time. I was born 0:04:42.600 --> 0:04:50.120 January first, nineteen eighty nine in Hamilton, Ohio, to two 0:04:50.240 --> 0:04:54.560 parents who were very young, one of which had just 0:04:54.680 --> 0:04:58.880 graduated high school and one of which was going into 0:04:58.960 --> 0:05:05.680 the military. And I think I was a lot more 0:05:05.920 --> 0:05:14.279 than they expected, a lot more. I am brushing my 0:05:14.440 --> 0:05:17.840 hair out because we have to look like something. 0:05:19.120 --> 0:05:19.320 Now. 0:05:19.360 --> 0:05:27.919 I'm putting on lift gloss. This is fortune Cookie and 0:05:28.920 --> 0:05:31.159 I can't remember what this color. I think it's like 0:05:31.240 --> 0:05:35.200 temptation or something. A tempted fortune. 0:05:34.800 --> 0:05:51.440 Cookie looked this way. Smild you like ready, stand away 0:05:51.440 --> 0:05:51.800 from your car. 0:05:51.920 --> 0:05:52.280 You friend. 0:05:53.200 --> 0:05:54.000 Nice? 0:05:56.680 --> 0:06:05.080 Why didn't Now it's the waiting game. It's a good 0:06:07.400 --> 0:06:11.080 fingers crossed legs, crossed toes too. 0:06:13.640 --> 0:06:16.480 Oh please, oh please. 0:06:17.600 --> 0:06:26.920 Please, school gods help me. I look like my mom. Dank, 0:06:29.040 --> 0:06:42.760 h God, I look just like my mother. It's hilarious. 0:06:44.800 --> 0:06:53.640 Well we're official. Oh god, I like my mom. I 0:06:53.680 --> 0:06:57.000 had to send it to my husband. I'm still gonna 0:06:57.000 --> 0:07:12.840 face tyring. You want to see the picture. It looks cute. 0:07:13.400 --> 0:07:15.520 Don't I look like my mom? 0:07:17.920 --> 0:07:18.120 Oh? 0:07:18.200 --> 0:07:23.200 My god. Okay, that's all I wanted. We're walking around 0:07:23.240 --> 0:07:27.000 campus and think from the beginning, I showed signs of 0:07:28.040 --> 0:07:32.000 high expression. I loved with my mother while my father 0:07:32.120 --> 0:07:35.160 was in a military and I started second grade at 0:07:35.240 --> 0:07:39.720 Kramer Elementary, which is in Oxford. Activities that I was 0:07:39.840 --> 0:07:43.920 allowed to do at Kramer Elementary were that of playing 0:07:43.960 --> 0:07:47.880 with dolls. If I requested, I could do that. Seventy 0:07:47.920 --> 0:07:50.760 percent of the class was black. I had a black 0:07:50.880 --> 0:07:54.400 first grade teacher. Seventy to eighty percent of that class 0:07:54.520 --> 0:07:58.680 was black. All of the black figures of leadership and 0:07:58.800 --> 0:08:03.560 trailblazing movements were kind of presented to me at that time. 0:08:04.040 --> 0:08:08.000 When I went to Kramer, my mother had started to 0:08:08.280 --> 0:08:14.200 figure out that I was into women's things heels firstly, 0:08:16.680 --> 0:08:20.720 and from there I think my mother was looking for 0:08:20.760 --> 0:08:24.120 my father to save me and bring me back to manhood. 0:08:24.840 --> 0:08:26.760 And so I went to live with my dad at 0:08:26.800 --> 0:08:30.840 the age of seven and a half eight. So when 0:08:30.840 --> 0:08:35.400 I moved my father a few months after going to 0:08:35.480 --> 0:08:41.080 Kramer in Newport News, Virginia, which is of course a base, 0:08:43.160 --> 0:08:48.959 totally different environment, very structured. It was very you know, 0:08:49.120 --> 0:08:52.840 these are boys toys. I'll get you boys toys. We'll 0:08:52.840 --> 0:08:56.640 get your boy clothes. When I went to school in 0:08:56.679 --> 0:09:00.960 Newport News, I was made to do punishment if I talked, 0:09:01.120 --> 0:09:04.680 or because I was talkative, of in the corner, like 0:09:04.760 --> 0:09:08.080 I'd have to hold the push up position just because 0:09:08.120 --> 0:09:12.720 I was being expressive. So the introduction of a black 0:09:12.760 --> 0:09:15.160 male at that time, because that's what I identified as 0:09:15.240 --> 0:09:22.959 and was, it's just a It was a lot. Once 0:09:23.400 --> 0:09:27.640 I school became kind of the focus, and then not 0:09:27.760 --> 0:09:29.920 just the focus, it was kind of like that you 0:09:30.120 --> 0:09:32.520 have to and then not just that you have to, 0:09:32.720 --> 0:09:37.120 it's you have to do better. And then with each 0:09:37.200 --> 0:09:40.400 grade it just felt like more and more and more 0:09:40.640 --> 0:09:44.240 was paling on to something that was already not being 0:09:44.280 --> 0:09:49.880 dealt with like who I am, how I identify? School started 0:09:49.920 --> 0:09:52.440 to be something where I would ditch class to be 0:09:52.520 --> 0:09:55.800 with boys, Like we ditch and go to the bathroom, 0:09:55.880 --> 0:10:00.480 and you know, you learned about anatomy and atomical mod movement, 0:10:00.600 --> 0:10:04.280 but that was it, you know, not how to handle 0:10:04.320 --> 0:10:08.440 yourself in those situations. So with that being said, I 0:10:08.600 --> 0:10:13.960 ended up in detentions and alternate school assignment so kind 0:10:13.960 --> 0:10:17.559 of like in school suspension, so you're removed from the 0:10:17.679 --> 0:10:22.000 other students in place with these students that they're labeling 0:10:22.040 --> 0:10:26.160 as bad or you know, disruptive, and you have to 0:10:26.240 --> 0:10:28.600 do all the assignments that are put in class, but 0:10:28.720 --> 0:10:32.240 without any of the fun. And I think I was 0:10:33.559 --> 0:10:38.240 fourteen fifteen, and one day I came home and then 0:10:38.440 --> 0:10:40.360 was like a fifteen I was supposed to be in 0:10:40.559 --> 0:10:42.640 by eight, and my father would not let me in 0:10:42.640 --> 0:10:46.400 the house. I walked away from the house and I 0:10:46.440 --> 0:10:50.160 was going to my friend Sabrina's house, and my father 0:10:50.440 --> 0:10:54.480 apparently had come looking for me. He was like, well, 0:10:54.600 --> 0:10:58.240 you better beat me home before I get home. Impossible 0:10:58.240 --> 0:11:01.160 in a car, And when it got out car, he 0:11:01.400 --> 0:11:03.240 like threw me over the hood of the car and 0:11:03.440 --> 0:11:07.280 was just really upset that I didn't make a home 0:11:07.280 --> 0:11:09.280 by curfew. I mean, that's what all of this was 0:11:09.320 --> 0:11:13.320 out for her. And after he left and that happened, 0:11:13.360 --> 0:11:16.280 I called the police. I went to some neighbor's house 0:11:16.320 --> 0:11:18.920 and I just called the police. And when the police 0:11:18.960 --> 0:11:22.079 got to the house, they basically blamed me and said 0:11:22.120 --> 0:11:24.720 I should be listening to this man in this nice 0:11:24.760 --> 0:11:32.160 home and all this bullshit. And after they left, you know, 0:11:32.840 --> 0:11:35.520 my dad came into the room after I said, oh, 0:11:35.559 --> 0:11:40.200 didn't to go to sleep, and was like, well, since 0:11:40.240 --> 0:11:42.560 you don't feel so safe, you need to find yourself 0:11:42.600 --> 0:11:46.839 somewhere else to live. When I got to my mom's house, 0:11:46.960 --> 0:11:49.480 you know, it's a great time for a period of time, 0:11:49.640 --> 0:11:53.160 and then it starts to settle. End that one. You're 0:11:54.040 --> 0:11:59.600 poor in this space. Not only poor, you're dealing with 0:11:59.640 --> 0:12:04.240 the mother who has issues. So I go to register 0:12:04.360 --> 0:12:08.040 for school and I was started in the freshman building. 0:12:09.200 --> 0:12:11.840 At this point, I had been held back about two 0:12:11.840 --> 0:12:17.120 to three times in school, and after three days there, 0:12:17.280 --> 0:12:21.200 I just couldn't do it. It was children. I dropped out. 0:12:22.720 --> 0:12:25.280 My mom the next day she said, come on, I'm 0:12:25.280 --> 0:12:28.480 gonna take you somewhere. We went on this trip to Cincinnati, 0:12:28.679 --> 0:12:32.400 and she was like, I found somewhere where you can 0:12:32.480 --> 0:12:36.760 make some money. And I was like, okay. We wound 0:12:36.840 --> 0:12:43.280 up going to job Corps, the recruiting space, and the 0:12:43.400 --> 0:12:47.520 lady was like, well, you got two options. She said, 0:12:48.040 --> 0:12:50.319 you can either stay at home with your mom and 0:12:50.520 --> 0:12:53.960 she take you to class, or you can go to Dayton, 0:12:54.559 --> 0:12:56.520 where you can live on campus and I'll pay you 0:12:56.559 --> 0:13:00.720 a little stipend every week. And oh, well, I'll go 0:13:00.760 --> 0:13:15.839 to Dayton. I had to shave my hair. I had 0:13:15.880 --> 0:13:22.200 a mohawk, a literally a literal mohawk, and it was 0:13:22.360 --> 0:13:27.840 blind ends and they told me, they said, you're gonna 0:13:27.840 --> 0:13:32.920 have to cut the hair, and I was I was devastated, 0:13:32.920 --> 0:13:39.360 but I was like, okay, okay. And when I cut 0:13:39.559 --> 0:13:44.960 my hair, it felt like my whole life started that 0:13:45.160 --> 0:13:47.840 At that very moment, I felt like adult had started 0:13:48.000 --> 0:13:55.000 for me. I not only past the ged the first 0:13:55.040 --> 0:14:02.240 time I took it. I graduated the same month as 0:14:02.559 --> 0:14:05.720 my actual class was supposed to graduate. From the very 0:14:05.720 --> 0:14:08.959 beginning of me being in school, I graduated in May 0:14:09.120 --> 0:14:14.000 of seven. Like it was. I can't even explain to 0:14:14.040 --> 0:14:18.120 you how much all of that turmoil was meant to 0:14:18.200 --> 0:14:22.200 happen in order for me to understand what it means 0:14:22.240 --> 0:14:25.240 to be traumatized and get past it. 0:14:25.840 --> 0:14:32.640 And going to this. 0:14:34.680 --> 0:14:47.320 Dang. I have three pages of notes already, learn some 0:14:47.400 --> 0:14:55.440 new terminology. It's pretty exciting. I mean, it was a 0:14:55.480 --> 0:14:59.800 good class, great professor. I think he is extremely knowledge 0:14:59.840 --> 0:15:03.680 of He asked a question about what is quit pro quo, 0:15:04.920 --> 0:15:10.400 and of course I know exactly what that is. A 0:15:10.720 --> 0:15:20.240 sea of diversity and youth. We're singing questions so diverse. 0:15:22.920 --> 0:15:26.240 Right now, we're headed to the fourth floor in order 0:15:26.280 --> 0:15:29.160 to go to find where the second class is and 0:15:29.240 --> 0:15:34.560 then starting till twelve fifty and so we're just making 0:15:34.560 --> 0:15:42.240 our way downtown, walking fast faces past and we're class bound. 0:15:49.360 --> 0:15:52.120 I ended up meeting a friend of mine who was 0:15:52.120 --> 0:15:59.840 from Muskegan, Muskegan, Michigan UH named Torrianto and he he 0:16:00.000 --> 0:16:05.600 he was the introduction to ballroom for me. He was 0:16:05.640 --> 0:16:09.640 playing a Miss Jay Kuran beat and voguing in the 0:16:09.680 --> 0:16:16.280 courtyard and and I was like, child, I could do that. 0:16:16.640 --> 0:16:20.120 And that was kind of the moment where I started 0:16:20.200 --> 0:16:25.320 learning how to vogue and dip and all this stuff. 0:16:25.360 --> 0:16:28.480 And I was like, oh, I love this. So he 0:16:28.640 --> 0:16:35.920 was showing me videos of you know, Sonaia, of Ashley Yaalanda, 0:16:36.240 --> 0:16:44.120 of Katrina, of Mika, of like all the girls that 0:16:44.360 --> 0:16:49.880 were the girls at that time, and I was just obsessed, 0:16:50.000 --> 0:16:55.720 totally obsessed. Just the beat, the presumptuous understanding that with 0:16:55.840 --> 0:16:59.160 this beat your meant to dance. Like That's what registered 0:16:59.200 --> 0:17:03.720 in my mind as soon as I saw voguing. I 0:17:04.720 --> 0:17:09.720 they just like it's slammed together. It was perfectly pronounced 0:17:09.720 --> 0:17:15.720 that this is what happens. And so I've always been ballroom. 0:17:15.920 --> 0:17:20.160 I just didn't know how to express it. So at 0:17:20.200 --> 0:17:22.520 home when I was living with my father, looking on 0:17:22.600 --> 0:17:28.120 YouTube and stuff like that, my best friend Cameron, we 0:17:28.160 --> 0:17:32.880 had watched many, many clips voguing in the house all 0:17:32.920 --> 0:17:35.960 the time. One day we went to this mini ball 0:17:36.000 --> 0:17:39.959 in somebody's house because they're called many balls, and I 0:17:40.080 --> 0:17:48.280 was walking the category of runway because duh. But the 0:17:48.400 --> 0:17:52.000 crazy part about it was I didn't understand the fundamentals 0:17:52.040 --> 0:17:56.679 of it. And I got on the floor and it 0:17:56.800 --> 0:18:00.400 was almost like everybody was waiting for me to do anything, 0:18:00.800 --> 0:18:07.080 and they chopped me in this house for walking this category. 0:18:07.280 --> 0:18:09.359 And the funny thing was when me and my best 0:18:09.400 --> 0:18:13.359 friend left, we was like that's the last time that's 0:18:13.800 --> 0:18:18.520 ever gonna happen. Like we were determined to be the 0:18:18.600 --> 0:18:26.280 best Cincinnati had ever produced, right amazing. I gave him 0:18:26.320 --> 0:18:29.120 a business card and tell him how excited I am 0:18:29.160 --> 0:18:36.000 about that class. I'm really enjoyed the syllabus, so I'm 0:18:36.000 --> 0:18:40.720 looking forward to it because I got so much information 0:18:40.920 --> 0:18:44.760 just from today that had I not been in class 0:18:45.560 --> 0:18:50.720 at the appropriate time and listening, like I truly would 0:18:50.760 --> 0:18:56.600 have missed some very good points in some initial ways 0:18:56.600 --> 0:19:00.560 to study. Like I now know how my study it 0:19:00.600 --> 0:19:02.480 needs to go. I feel like the first day of 0:19:02.520 --> 0:19:04.600 class is supposed to give you that, and that's what 0:19:04.600 --> 0:19:16.040 I got. I feel totally affirmed in the decision I made. 0:19:17.160 --> 0:19:21.400 The diversity that I've seen there today has been affirming 0:19:21.480 --> 0:19:24.760 as well. A lot of the interest that the students 0:19:24.760 --> 0:19:27.920 seem to have seem to be pretty much aligned. I mean, 0:19:27.960 --> 0:19:32.600 there's a probably a ten year age difference between myself 0:19:32.640 --> 0:19:37.280 and the majority of the ten years plus of myself 0:19:37.320 --> 0:19:41.119 and the students, so I think they're just a little 0:19:41.119 --> 0:19:47.400 more excited than I am. Probably I'm like, yeah, when 0:19:47.400 --> 0:19:53.080 can I take a nap? Me and my best friend 0:19:53.480 --> 0:19:56.879 Sydney at the time was like we could go to 0:19:57.000 --> 0:20:02.160 one or two places, you know, replaces La New York 0:20:02.320 --> 0:20:08.720 or Atlanta. And I was like, fucking I mean, I 0:20:08.760 --> 0:20:15.360 had two trash bags and a suitcase and I got 0:20:15.400 --> 0:20:19.479 on that bus and I went to Atlanta sixteen hours. 0:20:19.480 --> 0:20:26.360 If I'm not mistaken, Atlanta was full of you could 0:20:26.359 --> 0:20:28.840 be whatever you want, but you better make it work. 0:20:30.080 --> 0:20:37.600 That's what Atlanta was built on. I ain. During that time. 0:20:38.760 --> 0:20:43.240 I had contracted HIV In twenty eleven, I was at 0:20:44.040 --> 0:20:46.440 a club night. My best friend Camera and had come 0:20:46.480 --> 0:20:50.280 down to visit, and it was getting free if you 0:20:50.400 --> 0:20:52.800 just tested, and I was like, okay, well cool, we'll 0:20:52.840 --> 0:20:55.760 go test because I can spend more money on drinks 0:20:55.800 --> 0:21:01.680 at this point. So and got to test. My vest 0:21:01.720 --> 0:21:04.320 friend Guy as the results he was fined, and I 0:21:04.359 --> 0:21:07.399 got my results and they said, well this is showing 0:21:07.480 --> 0:21:12.639 up preliminary positive, and so my entire world was crumbling. 0:21:13.520 --> 0:21:19.159 I was absolutely, you know, distracted by survival. How was 0:21:19.200 --> 0:21:22.399 I going to survive? Am I going to live? What 0:21:22.440 --> 0:21:26.760 does this mean for sexuality? How do I engage sexually 0:21:26.840 --> 0:21:31.280 with people with being HIV positive? All of these thoughts? 0:21:31.600 --> 0:21:37.199 How old were you on this? Twenty one two and 0:21:37.280 --> 0:21:39.840 it was just horrible. I had to drop out of school. 0:21:39.920 --> 0:21:46.600 My grades were horrible, and yeah, I was homeless. I 0:21:46.640 --> 0:21:48.600 was sleeping on some friends who were still in the 0:21:48.640 --> 0:21:52.920 same schools couch for a while for a few months, 0:21:53.080 --> 0:21:58.160 I think, and I one day I had gotten into 0:21:58.240 --> 0:22:04.160 housing and founder program Evolution Center and they would give 0:22:04.240 --> 0:22:09.800 gift cards and resources and shout out to John Diggs 0:22:09.920 --> 0:22:14.240 changed my life. He recommended me going to the Grady 0:22:14.320 --> 0:22:20.760 IDP building anyways, that's where all the infectious people were going. 0:22:21.720 --> 0:22:24.560 And so I signed up for and I was waiting 0:22:24.600 --> 0:22:28.359 around and one day I was able to get an 0:22:28.440 --> 0:22:33.760 apartment and downtown in this place called the Etgewood Center, 0:22:34.760 --> 0:22:38.120 and that came with supportive services. So the supportive services 0:22:38.160 --> 0:22:42.160 place was behind. So I moved in there. My best 0:22:42.160 --> 0:22:45.960 friend helped me move in. It's a room like this, 0:22:46.880 --> 0:22:51.360 a little smaller than this. And I lived there for 0:22:53.760 --> 0:22:59.640 six years, six seven years. The first four I cocooned 0:23:00.920 --> 0:23:04.520 twenty three, twenty four. I was like, okay, bitch, do 0:23:04.560 --> 0:23:06.960 you want to be a man walking around in hills 0:23:07.000 --> 0:23:14.520 at forty five? And I started identifying with exactly what 0:23:14.720 --> 0:23:21.160 made me happy, and my womanhood was what made me happy, 0:23:21.440 --> 0:23:25.639 like truly being able to just go ahead and follow 0:23:25.680 --> 0:23:28.359 that path. And so the next time I had a 0:23:28.359 --> 0:23:30.439 doctor's appointment, I think it's a week or two later, 0:23:31.800 --> 0:23:34.600 I told him what I was thinking. You know, I 0:23:35.280 --> 0:23:38.240 would love to hear about options of that, and he 0:23:38.280 --> 0:23:40.639 looked at me. The doctor looked at me and he said, 0:23:41.600 --> 0:23:45.800 I absolutely can see where that would go for you, 0:23:46.119 --> 0:23:48.840 and if that's what you want to do it, gave 0:23:48.840 --> 0:23:51.520 me a pamphlet and tell me he'd give me a 0:23:51.520 --> 0:23:54.840 week to think about it. That night, I called my 0:23:55.040 --> 0:23:58.040 parents and told him. We came up with a name, 0:23:59.000 --> 0:24:04.240 me and Ifat and Cody, and I chose Jennifer. My 0:24:04.320 --> 0:24:06.560 aunt Ifat gave me the last name of Barnes. She 0:24:06.680 --> 0:24:12.440 was like Barnes the name Salama, and it stuck and 0:24:12.520 --> 0:24:15.480 I became Jennifer Barnes. I called my parents and told 0:24:15.520 --> 0:24:18.119 them that's what my name was. That's how I wanted 0:24:18.119 --> 0:24:25.800 them to refer to me. And yeah, I really focused 0:24:25.840 --> 0:24:29.159 on what did it mean to be the woman that 0:24:29.359 --> 0:24:33.919 I saw inside of me? What did that mean? What 0:24:34.040 --> 0:24:39.520 did I desire? How could I do that efficiently productively? 0:24:40.280 --> 0:24:43.160 I didn't want to be the same person I was before, 0:24:44.680 --> 0:24:49.080 So I got in touch with Chanelle Haley because I 0:24:49.200 --> 0:24:52.800 was changing my names at this time. Chanelle Haley at 0:24:53.000 --> 0:24:58.640 Georgia Equality in Atlanta, Georgia, and I was like, oh, 0:24:58.680 --> 0:25:01.159 they won't let me change my name. I had no 0:25:01.240 --> 0:25:04.439 idea about how to do any of that shit. She 0:25:04.640 --> 0:25:08.680 listened to me, huh, because she's very about our business. 0:25:09.119 --> 0:25:12.000 And then she got me in contact with Emily Halden Brown, 0:25:12.680 --> 0:25:15.679 and Emily Halden Brown got me in contact with BT. 0:25:15.960 --> 0:25:20.720 He goes by BT, and he literally hand held walked 0:25:20.720 --> 0:25:24.800 me through changing my name for free in Atlanta. It 0:25:24.880 --> 0:25:42.280 was the most underground shit I had ever seen. I 0:25:42.320 --> 0:25:45.760 remember my court date. I have a picture on my 0:25:45.960 --> 0:25:48.800 phone of the day that I changed my name to Jennifer. 0:25:50.320 --> 0:25:53.480 That was the first thing that I had really done 0:25:53.680 --> 0:25:58.080 in completion. And after I started doing that, I became 0:25:58.119 --> 0:26:01.119 an advocate for it becoming easier for people to be 0:26:01.160 --> 0:26:04.760 able to change their name. So that was my platform 0:26:04.960 --> 0:26:12.520 in the beginning, was being a name change specialists. Everything 0:26:12.560 --> 0:26:16.800 started to blossom once I started becoming happy with my decisions, 0:26:17.400 --> 0:26:20.399 being able to make my own decisions. You know that 0:26:20.560 --> 0:26:27.919 is truly, it is the truth. If you allow a 0:26:28.040 --> 0:26:33.080 flower to just be, it will bloom. If you give 0:26:33.119 --> 0:26:37.879 it all the necessary things that needs it will bloom sunlight, 0:26:38.000 --> 0:26:45.600 photosynthesis is real, water feeding drinking is real, and food 0:26:45.880 --> 0:26:50.800 or pollination it does, it works. All those things work 0:26:50.880 --> 0:26:54.440 together in tandem. So I think all of those things. Internally, 0:26:54.480 --> 0:26:58.040 I started to understand and started to be appreciative of 0:26:58.080 --> 0:27:00.920 the opportunities. I was given the peace that I was 0:27:00.960 --> 0:27:05.000 able to sustain for myself and started to pay attention 0:27:05.080 --> 0:27:08.119 to Okay, now what else can I do to help? 0:27:09.640 --> 0:27:14.080 Once I figured out legally that I was me that 0:27:14.240 --> 0:27:17.960 everything started to click. I got invited to come to 0:27:18.200 --> 0:27:24.280 a youth policy HIV Advisor's interest meeting and then they 0:27:24.320 --> 0:27:26.200 said that they were going to give us a stipend 0:27:27.160 --> 0:27:29.080 and I was like, oh, well, I'm set I this 0:27:29.280 --> 0:27:34.639 ain't sure, I'll do it. Absolutely sure will. The next 0:27:34.680 --> 0:27:37.560 week or maybe the week after, we had a meeting 0:27:37.640 --> 0:27:41.360 with state Representative Park Cannon. That was my first time. 0:27:41.400 --> 0:27:43.560 I think I have a picture of that too, of 0:27:43.800 --> 0:27:50.240 like me being able to be on the bill. So 0:27:50.280 --> 0:27:53.800 it was the Georgia Legislative Black Caucus, and it was 0:27:53.840 --> 0:27:59.240 Georgia's Sexual Health Policy Symposium of twenty fifteen, and I 0:27:59.320 --> 0:28:03.040 was on a panel for voices of the epidemic black women, 0:28:03.359 --> 0:28:09.280 transgender people, black MSM, and LGBTQ youth. I felt like 0:28:09.320 --> 0:28:11.560 I was trusted in what I would, what I knew. 0:28:12.359 --> 0:28:14.600 I felt like this was the first time that I 0:28:14.680 --> 0:28:19.440 was able to really do things my way. And that's 0:28:19.560 --> 0:28:22.760 all I've ever wanted, all I've ever wanted. If you 0:28:22.800 --> 0:28:25.320 be and anybody, they'll probably tell you that's the one 0:28:25.359 --> 0:28:27.240 thing about me. I've got to do it my way. 0:28:28.960 --> 0:28:33.480 My life skyrocketed. It was just like it just went 0:28:33.680 --> 0:28:36.480 up and it was the only person that could stop 0:28:36.480 --> 0:28:41.680 me was me. Okay, so I just reapply my lip gloss. 0:28:41.720 --> 0:28:46.640 After eating a delicious lunch at Chipotle, we are headed 0:28:46.720 --> 0:28:52.840 back now to European Political Systems class at Barot College. 0:28:53.160 --> 0:29:03.360 Whoo yeah, ver y. I want to power. I definitely 0:29:03.400 --> 0:29:11.720 am a person that's looking forward to leaving d US. 0:29:11.800 --> 0:29:16.240 I'm not sure if it'll be short term or I'll 0:29:16.240 --> 0:29:21.680 be an expat or who knows, but I definitely am 0:29:21.760 --> 0:29:28.600 looking for future career moves. That's the goal. I'm looking 0:29:28.680 --> 0:29:35.120 to leave the US to become better acquainted with international procedures. 0:29:35.800 --> 0:29:39.760 I believe that America has a lot of growth to do. 0:29:39.960 --> 0:29:43.560 Being one of the youngest nations in existence with so 0:29:43.680 --> 0:29:49.600 much controversy that could have probably been avoided if we'd 0:29:49.920 --> 0:29:57.280 only learned new and more efficient and inclusive and equitable 0:29:58.080 --> 0:30:05.240 means for Americans to exist row versus way being overturned, 0:30:05.920 --> 0:30:11.680 ways that we can certainly identify and find layers of 0:30:11.760 --> 0:30:16.920 how to make sure that those types of inconsistencies don't happen. 0:30:19.920 --> 0:30:24.680 The only reason why I'm able to pursue these goals today, 0:30:24.840 --> 0:30:30.040 you know, it's because I saw Shirley Chisholm. This is 0:30:30.080 --> 0:30:33.000 the only reason why I do what I do, and 0:30:33.280 --> 0:30:46.480 she did, you know, the first. So ballroom prepared me 0:30:46.640 --> 0:30:54.000 to face any room head up, shoulders back, legs stretched 0:30:54.120 --> 0:30:58.200 for the stripe, like I am absolutely prepared to do 0:30:58.280 --> 0:31:04.360 whatever is necessary to make sure that equity is completely enforced. 0:31:04.840 --> 0:31:12.040 So barroom in itself is a rebellious movement, a rebellious 0:31:12.080 --> 0:31:15.160 movement of what we couldn't be included in. So if 0:31:15.200 --> 0:31:17.959 I can't be a lawyer, I'm going to portray a lawyer. 0:31:18.480 --> 0:31:20.840 If I can't be a runway model, I'm going to 0:31:20.880 --> 0:31:23.800 portray a runway model. If I'm not asked to be 0:31:23.840 --> 0:31:26.600 a beauty queen, if I'm not allowed to compete as 0:31:26.600 --> 0:31:30.080 a beauty queen. I'm going to portray that within ballroom. 0:31:30.240 --> 0:31:36.040 That's what the face category is for. You see the 0:31:36.080 --> 0:31:44.040 presentation of life in America. It truly is the most 0:31:44.040 --> 0:31:48.280 beautiful mockery of it. That's what it was created for. 0:31:48.400 --> 0:31:50.720 Because you won't let us in, we'll do it ourselves, 0:31:50.800 --> 0:31:53.680 and we'll do it probably even better in ninety nine 0:31:53.720 --> 0:31:57.719 percent of time. That's what happens. You know, everything glamorous 0:31:57.800 --> 0:32:02.720 comes from ballroom. Believe that we're talking about mainstream of 0:32:02.840 --> 0:32:07.280 black and brown ball room. And for me, the highest 0:32:07.800 --> 0:32:12.320 house in the land was always the House of Balenciaga. 0:32:13.120 --> 0:32:17.120 I have been approached by the House of Mizrahi, the 0:32:17.200 --> 0:32:22.520 House of gar Song, I'd been approached by House of Ebony, 0:32:23.360 --> 0:32:28.000 I had been approached by the House of avant Garde, 0:32:28.040 --> 0:32:33.680 which I did have a lot of mentors during that time. 0:32:34.120 --> 0:32:39.400 In that house, I helped impost group with a voter 0:32:39.520 --> 0:32:43.240 registration and at the voter registration is where I ran 0:32:43.280 --> 0:32:47.600 into the legend Rico Balenciaga again, and that's where he 0:32:47.640 --> 0:32:50.520 said the statement about how aga ish I was starting 0:32:50.560 --> 0:32:56.080 to look and carrying myself, and you know, he knew 0:32:56.200 --> 0:32:58.800